Sin
by Kiya Sama
Summary: An elite officer without remorse. A young man struggling for survival. Welcome to Byaku-Shinkyou, where your sins are purged, though temptation still beckons and the willpower to resist is futile.
1. 01: Porcelain Skin

**Sin (Tsumi)**

**Main Pairing: **UchihaSasuke and Uzumaki Naruto

**Sub Pairings:** Expect the unexpected

**Genres:** Drama, Angst, Historical, Romance

**Rating:** Mature

**Author's Notes: **Thanks to reading a lot of samurai-based manga and WWII-based novels in the past few months (don't ask), the muses got a-roaring again, and I've decided to sink my teeth back into Naruto fan fiction. Now, unlike pure samurai stories, I have taken plenty of liberties with this one. Just like Kishimoto's Naruto world seems to be a blend of the old and new, so will this story. There will be modern devices here and there, but many throw-backs to the Tokugawa/Edo era as well. I do not know if supernatural elements will appear yet (as in special fighting skills etc. etc.), but if that does happen, it happens. With that said, I would really appreciate people not sending me snippy comments about how this doesn't fit into that. Even though I'm blending two eras, I am still doing my research to keep things as authentic as possible.

Secondly, this story is dark and will have scenes that might be unpleasant or too graphic for most readers. I make no apologies for that, because back in the day torture and abuse was rampant and not fun either. I do, however, make apologies for any typos you might notice. I tend to write fast, and do my best to edit afterwards, but I might miss one or two things here and there.

Thirdly, the 'voice' of the characters might appear to be older than they are, and that is because it was envisioned with the main characters writing out their tales when they are…well…much older. So if you read it, and notice that Naruto sounds like he just stepped out of college, just imagine him as some older guy sitting in his office, writing out his memoir. I'd like to think he's much smarter by then. Don't you?

And last but not least, to anyone who even considers ripping off this story and posting it as theirs, please do NOT even contemplate doing that. It really upsets me to see this happening more and more, and I honestly now dread posting my work on this site. So please, if you enjoy the story, direct others to it, but do **not** pass it off as your own!

And to those who do read it, your comments/feedback are always welcome and very much appreciated. Enjoy! :D

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 01:<strong>

**Porcelain Skin**

_Our life in this world_

_To what shall I compare it?_

_It's like an echo_

_Resounding through the mountains_

_And off into the empty sky_

_- Monk Ryokan_

It was impossible to miss her.

She easily stood out amongst the other grimy occupants of the congested, claustrophobic, and heaving bus; her porcelain skin like a beacon for those who cared to notice.

It was an anomaly in the grand scheme of things; though she did her best to blend in with the rest of us dressed in yukatas or Sunday Bests' that had seen better days. I would almost laugh at her attempt to look like 'one-of-us', but I was too busy admiring her very presence to show my uncouth manners. Besides, I wanted to make a good impression despite my -

"Move it, kid," came the gruff retort as I was shoved unceremoniously to the side; nearly falling on my ass to the mud-slicked floor in the process. There was barely enough room to breathe and yet this gigantic moron had almost tried to kill me with just a jab from his meaty elbow. It didn't help that he stunk of raw fish and stale cabbage, and as he oozed himself between two skinny men - who seemed to shrink aside in fear (or maybe the stench) - I sighed and rose to my feet; now eager to find a seat lest I be made to stand for the lengthy journey.

Unfortunately, the only empty seat was two rows ahead of the subject of my admiration, but at least it was on the opposite side of the bus, so if I was careful, I could sneak a few glances here and there without attracting too much attention. Clutching the brown paper bag tightly against my chest, which contained a pitiful number of personal belongings I was allowed to bring, I squeezed next to a passenger who was already snoring in the midst of the din surrounding us. Unbelievable.

Dressed in a gray yukata, he looked like he was in his twenties, though with the struggles of this day and age, I wouldn't be surprised if he was actually a teenager like me. His shaved head seemed to gleam beneath the pale sunlight that filtered through the dusty windows, and subconsciously, I ran my fingers through my blond tresses; wondering if there would come a day when I'd have to shave it all off too. It had grown a little longer in the past few months during my stay at Tosho-gu, forcing me to keep it in a loose ponytail. I would have preferred to have it back to its familiar short length, but who had the time or money to go to a barber these days?

Suddenly feeling morose at the sight of the drool accumulating in my new companion's mouth, I sighed and tried to make myself comfortable, but it was practically impossible. The seat was of hard wood; the kind that dug into your buttocks and made it hurt with every movement. There was no arm rest, and I dared not set my bag down as the likelihood of it disappearing within seconds was high. My traveling companions were not exactly the most innocent of people after all, and though the sun was yet to reach its zenith, it was still blistering hot in these tight confines. Sweat drenched our flesh and soaked our clothes; the dark, patchy stains beneath armpits, backs, and chests ugly reminders of our pitiful situations.

"Move it! Move it! Come on! We ain't got all day!" came the impatient wail from one of the conductors outside as three more passengers were shoved into the already pregnant bus. Grumbles and mumbles began in the back, and it didn't take long for someone to mutter out loud about the dismal conditions.

"We ain't animals," came the complaint. "We ain't even got room to jerk off."

Amidst the bleak situation, this statement did get some of us laughing, but I immediately blushed in embarrassment as I realized that such a crude joke might not be appreciated by our lone female traveler. I dared to steal a peek; thankful that the newcomers were moving toward the back so as not to obstruct my view.

I wasn't sure of what to expect; that perhaps she would be frowning in distaste or pouting in disapproval. However – and much to my reluctant admiration - she didn't seem fazed at all. If anything, her attention was focused outside the window; an expression of indifference (or boredom) etched on those pale features.

_She must have witnessed plenty of such crude behavior, _I deduced; now wondering if she had grown up in those homes where yakuza often paid visits on a daily basis. Or perhaps she _was_ the daughter of a yakuza. It would make sense then if she was 'one-of-us'; though it was a rarity that such people were actually brought to justice. Yakuza were known to pay off the watchdogs (police) and could get away with cold-blooded murder even with witnesses all over the place.

"Everyone in?" a conductor yelled, but his grating voice could have been miles away for all I cared. "All right! Bus Number 2308…GO!"

There was the piercing sound of a whistle being blown as the doors closed and my journey to a new life officially began. However, I was still preoccupied with thoughts of the girl and a life story I was readily creating for her.

_You must have lived such a rough life,_ I thought sadly; allowing my fantasies to take flight as the bus gave a loud groan – as if finally tired of being forced to remain in one position for so long – then a jarring jerk that sent most of us nearly hitting our heads or crashing our bodies against each other, before finally cranking its way out of the parking lot.

The commotion had finally awakened my companion, who blinked several times as if unsure of where he was. His beady dark eyes eventually cleared and after throwing me a cursory glance, he effectively dismissed me as non-threatening and snuggled closer to the window in an effort to get more comfortable. In less than a minute, he was snoring again! I had to admire his ability to block out everything else, though my ass was now beginning to hurt even worse than before. I already wanted to stretch my legs, but there was no where it could go. The space between seats was way too limited.

"Settle down, you worthless pieces of shit!" came the sudden loud bark which was promptly followed by the near deafening clank of an unsheathed sword struck against the steel barricade at the front of the bus. Whether it was the sound of his voice – which bore a striking resemblance to thunder – or his size, which was intimidating in itself; our watchdog for the journey was a living, breathing _monster._

The familiar uniform – the black kamishimo, striped hakama, and adorned crest (in the shape of a fan) – almost always sent a sliver of fear down the spines of many. As a little kid, I had always wanted to be a member of the elite watchdog force; to be able to walk down the streets in my costume with my swords and handguns fighting for the peace and stability of our towns and cities. I could still remember the many hours I'd spend just stalking Officer Dosu, who actually didn't seem to mind that he had an overzealous fan like me. In fact, he had called me over while enjoying a break with a fellow officer at a local noodle shop.

At first I wasn't sure if he was actually calling me, considering I had been hiding behind several large barrels outside the shop, but when he specifically pointed at me with his wakizashi, I knew the jig was up. I figured if I was going to get punished, I might as well take it like a man. Besides, I would only brag about it to my friends later on. It wasn't everyday any of us could show our scars from getting a beating from a watchdog. It was like a badge of honor!

"What's your name, boy?" Officer Dosu had asked as I stood before him with what I hoped was determination on my face. There was no need to show fear, but damn if his katana didn't look long and shiny. I wanted to touch it so bad, it hurt.

I stood at attention and opened my mouth to belt out "Uzumaki Naruto!" at the top of my lungs; much too loudly I guess because a few of the other patrons gawked at me, some with displeasure, others with amusement. Dosu was of the latter, for he burst into loud laughter and slapped his thigh, while his companion chuckled and shook his head.

"He's a brash one, isn't he?" Dosu remarked and grinned. The motion made the rugged scar on the left side of his face twist even more cruelly. I wondered what had happened to cause such a wound in the first place. A sword fight gone wrong? Though he was still alive, wasn't he? He pointed to his wakizashi. "Do you know what this is, Uzumaki Naruto?"

"It's a sword, sir," I replied with an eagerness I no longer tried to hide. "The sword given to elite officers."

"That's right. It is a sword for the elite." He paused as if considering something, and then with a light shrug, he withdrew the katana from his obi and held it out to me. "Would you like to hold it, Naruto?"

"Dosu," his companion warned in a low voice, though he continued to sip on his sake.

"He's just a kid," Dosu reasoned with a playful wink at me. "Besides, I think Uzumaki Naruto here wants to become an elite like us someday, don't you?"

"Do I!" I squealed breathlessly; unable to believe I was actually allowed to hold something so powerful in my hands. The scabbard alone was exquisite, and even 'til this day, I can still remember how its intricate gold design had shone beneath the sun in all its glory. However, as I tried to lift it and to swing like I had seen some _ronin_ do in the past, I found myself stumbling and falling flat on my face! My embarrassment was complete when the officers burst into laughter and even a few of the patrons snickered and seemed to mock me. Sure I was just a seven-year-old snotty-nosed orphan that roamed the streets; it still didn't give them the right to make fun of me.

Feeling my eyes burn with tears, I grit my teeth and staggered to my feet; using the sword as leverage. It was much heavier than I thought, but I was determined to at least swing it once. I tried again, and the result was no different. I barked my shin, scraped my knee and wound up with a bloody nose, but I wasn't going to give up. No way. Not while I had this opportunity. By this time, they had stopped laughing and some were beginning to look at me with pity, but I didn't care. Sweat poured down my face in rivulets and stung my eyes. My arms were tired; unused muscles protesting with each motion. I had lost count of how many times I had tried to swing the damn thing, and just as my knees trembled in my final effort to save face, I felt the larger hand clasp mine gently but firmly.

"It is not your time, Uzumaki Naruto."

I looked up and into the pity-filled expression on the officer's visage; the bitter bile of defeat filling my tongue. Gently, he took the sword away from me, but first wiping the sweat and drops of blood I had imprinted on it with a silk cloth. I envied how effortlessly he seemed to lift it before attaching it back to his hakama.

"Perhaps in a few more years, hmm?" He reached out to ruffle my hair. "Keep working hard at it. You show signs of promise."

_My ass,_ I thought bitterly before doing the unthinkable.

I spat at his feet.

That alone would have gotten me beaten black and blue, if I had been caught, but I was just too fast for them. They finally gave up the chase after about an hour of me running through back alleys and secret hideaways; one of the many advantages of being another faceless orphan in this city. All the same, I think I cried myself to sleep that night and yet swore to train on my own so that someday I could show Officer Dosu and his stupid friend that I could become one of them. I knew it was a lofty goal for someone like me, but I was never one to back down from such grandiose delusions. I had latched on to that dream for most of my life.

So much for that now.

"Jesus…" I groaned as my companion's foot dug painfully into my ribs. The idiot had raised his legs onto a seat that was hardly wide enough for one person! Talk about being inconsiderate.

Tempted to push him hard, my plan was thwarted when a shadow fell over me. I looked up and into the watchdog's towering features; wondering what I had done now to deserve such special attention. In fact, it seemed like everyone else in the bus was now staring at us in anticipation. What the hell happened while I was lost in my thoughts? Did I miss some important announcement?

"You!" came the angry command laced with spittle.

_Huh?  
><em>

As if in slow motion, I watched the officer's wakizashi whipped out of from his obi – braced myself for the hit - before it was struck hard against my companion's face. The effect was immediate as his howl of pain was lost in the gurgle of blood that now filled his mouth and dribbled down to his chin. Something white and shiny plopped onto his lap, and I realized he had lost a tooth as well. It didn't help that spatters of his blood had ended up on my face and arms, but I dared not wipe them off now. Not in this tense situation. Hell, I dared not breathe!

"Whaaadaaaadoooo?" the man gurgled in panic, fear, and confusion. And who could blame him? He was just enjoying his nap for crying out loud. There was no need for the violence.

The watchdog's lips parted to reveal teeth that were as sharp as razors. I shuddered in repulsion at the sight. He couldn't be human.

"Sleeping already?" the officer drawled as if in amusement; though the glint in his dark eyes spoke otherwise. "Enjoying yourself, are you? Let's see how well you sleep now, you filthy asshole."

"Whaaaaruuurgh!"

To my horror, the man was dragged by the scruff of his yukata and tossed into the middle of the aisle; where the other men seemed to shrink away subconsciously as if aware of what was about to happen. In this state, my former companion looked small and petrified as he tried to scramble to his feet, but he didn't get very far as he was kicked hard in the stomach; sending him toppling back to the floor with a grunt of pain that was accompanied with the emptying of whatever he must have eaten that morning.

The beating was terrible, and I couldn't get myself to watch; though listening to it was even worse. No one said a word; only bearing the agonizing sounds of flesh upon flesh until even the victim's voice was silenced. I wouldn't have been surprised if he was dead. These watchdog bastards wouldn't give a shit anyway. They'd probably toss him out and make room for one more straggler.

_It's what we deserve,_ a part of me whispered, and I closed my eyes as I wondered what awaited me. Would I be tortured to the point of death? I had heard stories of this place we were heading to, but…but…

_I don't want to die. Not like this. Not now._

I suddenly felt the hairs at the back of my neck prickle with awareness; the awareness that someone was watching me. Fearing it was the second watchdog – who hadn't moved a muscle from his position beside the bus driver, I lifted my lashes and tried to see who it was. Not surprisingly, most of the men now had downcast gazes; silently chastised at the brutal show of authority by the officer in charge. No one dared look in defiance now for they knew what awaited them. So who could it…?

_Her._

The sudden thud of my heartbeat superseded any fear it could have conjured up for the bastard watchdogs. It was only for a moment – barely enough to even contemplate it being more than her probably looking in my direction and not directly _at me_ – but it was more than enough. Eyes as black as night; piercing in their intensity – had effectively knocked the wind out of my sails. It wasn't just how they looked (after all most of the people here had black eyes), it was the expression in them; an expression of quiet disgust and…anger perhaps? It was hard to tell.

She can't stand it either. Of course she can't! _Such brutality is not fit for a lady like you. If I could protect you, I would, but this is our reality now. There's no turning back._

"Anyone else want to consider this ride a pleasure trip?" the officer growled to the silent occupants. "Eh? Anyone?"

Of course no one did. Who would be stupid enough to answer?

"Remember this, you scums of the earth."

_Scum._ I had been called worse in the past, but it still stung to be insulted all the same. I bit my inner cheek hard enough to draw blood.

"…where you are going is a place to remind you of your sins and to cleanse you from them. You are all here for the same reason. You murderers, rapists, burglars, gold diggers, whores, scam artists, cheaters, drug dealers…and trash." He emphasized this by tipping the chin of a mousy-looking man who was just about ready to pee on himself…if he hadn't already…with his sheathed sword. "Some of you will make it, and some of you better start praying reaaaaal hard before you even get there. The purification of your tainted souls begins today."

_Purification, huh?_ What purification? So yes, what I had done was inexcusable, but I had good reason for it. I _had_ to do it. It was for survival. Where was the sin in killing a man for your survival?

It had rained that night. I remember. Raining pretty heavily. No one could have heard the scuffle. No one would have heard the raised voices. The gun had felt so damn heavy in my hand, and before I knew it…

**BAM!**

My lashes flew open and for a second, blind panic filled me as I looked around with widened eyes. It was considerably darker now; a sign that it was nightfall. Had I fallen asleep? When? I couldn't remember much of what happened after Officer Asshole's lecture, and I don't remember having anything to eat either as my stomach began to growl in response. Many of the men in the bus were fast asleep as well, and a quick glance down the aisle revealed that my ex-companion was still comatose in a pool of blood and vomitus around his battered body. I wondered if the stench filling my nostrils was from the combined body odors of the other men or his decaying body, though a light twitch of his leg revealed he was still (un)fortunately alive. My stomach growled again and I sagged in weariness…and then something even worse happened.

I needed to pee. _Badly._

The painful stomach cramp began almost immediately, and I winced and struggled not to reveal my distress too much. Had the bus stopped for a break while I dozed off? If that was the case, I was screwed.

_Fuck. Fuck! Fuck!_

I clamped my thighs together and tried to think of other things, but no matter what, my brain refused to cooperate and kept sending the damn signals to my groin.

_Oh God. Please….please…make this bus stop…even if it's for just a few seconds. I'm begging you! _

The very notion of urinating on myself was too humiliating. Not only would I reek, but there was a girl I was hoping to impress, and presenting myself in a soiled linen suit was definitely not appealing. She'd probably scream and kick me in the nuts before bolting for her dear life.

I stole another quick peek as if to make sure she wasn't already laughing at my discomfort. However, she was asleep…and something about watching her head nod ever so often against her chest made me smile despite the pain. Did I forget to mention her hair? Unlike most of the girls who seemed to like wearing it long these days, she had kept the black tresses short enough at the back but still long at the sides, so it framed her slightly angular features nicely. Ah ha! That's it! She's got 'handsome' features; those girls who could easily pass off as boys with just the right haircut.

Suddenly…the most beautiful sound in the world was heard. The screech of brakes and the bus finally…_finally_ coming to a stop!

_Thank you, God!_

"Five minutes!" Officer Asshole barked as the men began to rouse out of their stupors. I didn't need to be told twice. I was out of my seat, nearly knocking over a few other guys before jumping out of the bus and toward…_huh?_

_Where the fuck were we?_

If anyone had hoped to make an escape in some wooded area, there were completely out of luck. We could have been in the middle of nowhere for all the landscape presented us. Besides what looked like Mount Bandai in the distance, we were surrounded by mostly flat lands and skeletal communication poles with wires.

_No time to admire the scenery, Naruto! Get to business!_

…aaaaah. Bliss. Who knew peeing in public would be the greatest feeling in the world? And I didn't even mind that I was sharing the 'space' with two other men beside me. Their relief was just as palpable.

Speaking of which…how would the girl manage? I wondered if she would have to hold it in until we got there, and I was sorely tempted to walk up to her and to tell her that I'd hide her if need be. Though I realized it was a stupid thought, all of that was squashed in one fell swoop as I noticed her approaching…or rather heading back into the bus.

I gulped and zipped up in embarrassment as she glanced at me briefly. If she acknowledged I even existed, it was not obvious, but that's okay, I knew I wasn't exactly attractive. These damn scars/whiskers on my cheeks had put off many girls in the past despite my many attempts to explain that I had been born with them.

However, seeing her this way was enlightening. Outside…at least when not sitting, she was pretty damn tall for a girl – at least taller than me by an inch or so. She didn't walk like a girl either, but I'm guessing that's because of her upbringing; after all being around men so much would make you pick up a few things here and there. Her strides were confident and unflinching. In fact, her very aura seemed to scream 'back off!' and I could feel my chances of chatting her up slipping faster than the wind. She would never want to get with a person like me anyway. Whatever sin she might have committed, it couldn't be as bad as shooting a man to death. She didn't look like she belonged with us. Her kimono alone – though plain blue and white striped – looked well-made.

"If yer done staring," someone sneered behind me; causing a rush of color to flood my features.

Once everyone was back in the bus – though there was a brief delay as someone passed out with hunger and had to be dragged in by the disgruntled watchdogs – we were eventually on our way again. Time began to lose all meaning as I drifted in and out of consciousness. Between my stomach growling, the lack of proper sleep, and mini-fainting spells, I wanted this journey to be over already.

We stopped for another break sometime mid-afternoon the next day, and the effects of our lack of nourishment was now more obvious. Some of the men refused to leave their seats; some so weak they had even let go of their bodily fluids right there. This, of course, only got the officers more pissed off and needless to say, there were a few more beatings enforced. However, we were now somewhat numbed to the brutality, and I had learned to tune myself out of those moments and to focus on other things...like say my childhood or my life before the shit hit the fan.

As evening approached again, I wasn't sure if I could last another hour. My tongue felt parched and heavy in my mouth. I hadn't even had a drink of water for over twenty-four hours. The stomach cramps I was experiencing now were not a product of bladder issues, but of my body demanding some kind of nutritional relief. However, I knew I couldn't bear to show any weakness; not with that girl probably watching me.

_What's the point?_ My mind screamed in protest. _Like she gives a shit when she's been stuck in this bus with you for the past – _

"We're here," someone whispered feverishly behind me and that forced my heavy lashes to open. "I see them gates."

Like wild fire, the men passed on the news to each other, and just like that, our hours of dazed stupors were wiped away with an overwhelming feeling of fearful anticipation. I gripped my paper bag like a lifeline and squinted to make out the view before us. The bus was pulling up to a pair of towering wooden gates where four guards –dressed in the black watchdog gear – stood in waiting. One broke ranks to approach the driver, and after a brief discussion, an order was given for the others to open the gates.

We all seemed to hold our breaths collectively; our eyes widened in disbelief as we stared at the impressive courtyard illuminated by seemingly thousands of oil lamps and lanterns. Well-tended lawns, miniature ponds, and clean paved surfaces cocooned the bus which seemed to be making its way towards an impressive temple surrounded by several neat townhouses and what looked like one or two dojos. It was picturesque. It was ideal. It was like something out of a tourist postcard. It was too damn surreal.

Was this really the feared Byaku-Shinkyou? Where were the people who were painted as demons and who were ready to lead you straight into the pits of hell? Where were the torture chambers and sacrificial domes set up for prisoners to be executed? What was with all the flowers and trees and the false sense of peace and calm? This couldn't really be it…could it? When they had said purification, had they actually meant just coming to a temple to become like monks? If that was the case…

_Might not be so bad. I might actually…like it._

I thought too soon.

For no sooner had I began to relax into my happy assumption that all would be well, did the bus seem to take a sudden turn toward a much darker section of the seemingly endless compound. Though the gardens were still well tended, the buildings on this side were considerably less appealing to one's aesthetics. The houses looked like they were in need of repair, but that became the least of my worries when two rows of about ten large men, dressed in white togas, turbans, and wielding large spears (bokken? Can't tell in this light) suddenly marched out of nowhere to stop beside the bus.

"All right, everyone!" Officer Asshole bellowed with an unnecessary clang of his sword against the barricade again. "Let's make this quick and organized! One at a time now! One at a time!"

Obediently, we did as we were told. I had no time to wonder if the girl was going to be all right as I was immediately dragged off the bus by one of the toga'd officers – nearly falling to the ground – and pushed into a rough line with the other men.

_Shit!_

It was fucking coooold; a painful reminder that we were way up north now, where the nights were bound to be bitter come the winter months. Wishing I had worn a kimono instead of my cheap linen suit, I tried to control my shivering as we were ordered to form groups of five.

_Where is she?_ I thought frantically as I found myself amongst a group consisting of the fat bastard that nearly tripped me and the other who had sneered at me gawking at my unrequited love. But try as I might, I couldn't make her out anyway, which was odd. Had she escaped? How? Or maybe girls were taken to another section of the –

"Get moving!" came the gruff command as I was – again – pushed towards a set of wooden gates the guards must have come out of. It came as no surprise to realize that they seemed to lead into a cave of sorts. This was a mountainous area after all, so such things shouldn't have been unexpected. So much for the picturesque front. Whoever ran this joint was damn smart. I'd give them that.

For how long we marched into this cave, I had no idea. I was already weak and tired from hunger and weariness; and I could have sworn that I must have fallen asleep while walking at some point. Every now and then a loud bellow from the guard, the crack of a whip, the yell or groan from a prisoner would jerk me back to consciousness. After what seemed like an eternity, we were finally ordered to stop, where some of us promptly collapsed, while others threw up whatever little food they had left in their stomachs. I slumped against a wall and willed death to come. I could feel something warm and sticky trickle between my toes, and I knew it wasn't sweat but blood from walking for so damn long on rocky paths with shoes not geared for such trips.

Someone shouted an order, and on autopilot, we responded – forcing ourselves back to our feet. There was a new set of officers…no…not officers, but fellow prisoners I'm guessing, only they must have been here much longer than we have. They were dressed in plain drab gray kimonos, and as the officers began to bark their orders again, numbly we did as we were told and stripped down to our skivvies. The cold bit into my naked flesh, and as I took off my shoes, my worst fears were confirmed. The soles of my feet were raw and bleeding freely now, and I could barely take a step without wanting to scream in agony.

"Disgusting scum," one of the officers muttered beneath his breath as he noticed my predicament. "Shikamaru!" he suddenly called out with a snap of his fingers.

One of the older prisoners, a boy no older than I was, stepped out of the ranks of his fellow inmates and approached with an impassive expression on his visage. "Sir?"

"Get him treated and bring him to the pit immediately."

_The pit?_

"Yes, sir."

Shikamaru turned to me and gave a curt nod; hardly glancing at my feet. "Can you walk a couple of steps?"

"I think I can manage," I replied with a weak smile as I shrugged into what would become my outfit for the duration of my stay. For my bravado, I was rewarded with a light shrug as he turned to lead the way.

I've always been told I am a stubborn brat; heard that all my life in fact, and that trait couldn't have been needed more than now. Walking was hell, but I grit my teeth and did it all the same. It was funny having to sort of walk like you were tiptoeing, but fortunately for me, the 'infirmary' was closer than I thought.

If you could even call it that.

It was just a room with a bed that was barely comfortable. Shikamaru motioned for me to sit while he lit another lantern to give the room even more illumination. My attention was immediately directed at the small sink with its faucet, which had my parched throat longing for a taste of much-needed water. I licked my lips and dared to ask. Surely he wouldn't deny me the pleasure of just a sip, would he?

"Uum...may I?" I asked almost shyly.

He shrugged. "Help yourself."

Nearly bursting into tears of joy, I hobbled towards the sink, turned on the faucet with a trembling hand and nearly attached my entire mouth around it in an effort to get as much water as I could into my dehydrated body. I didn't care that the water seemed to have a caustic taste. All I needed was right here. I could think again.

"Take it easy now," Shikamaru was saying. "You might start..."

The cramps began even before he could finish his warning. That was the bad thing about drinking too fast especially after not having anything for a while. The body protests and it's not a pretty sight. I managed to turn off the tap, hobble back to the bed and wait for the pains to stop. Geez.

"We might have to wait a while," Shikamaru explained as he went over to a side table with some medical equipment – that in all honesty - looked archaic. "Kabuto does tend to take his sweet time whenever he wants."

I nodded and with a groan dared to lay flat on the bed in exhaustion. Compared to the chair and the million-mile walk, this was heaven!

"What are you in for?" I finally asked after what seemed like an eternity of agonizing silence, broken only by the muted and almost haunting sounds of movement from elsewhere in the caves. Shikamaru wasn't much of a talker was he? He had the kind of studious face…no…a face that looked studious, but also looked as if he didn't really give a shit about anything. He could pass for a slacker, if you took into consideration his long hair – which was in a ponytail – or the fact that his ears were pierced. I lifted my lashes to see if he was even still in the room with me considering he hadn't answered immediately, so I sat up on my elbows and tried again.

"Well?"

He was sitting on a stool, arms crossed on his chest with his features hidden in the shadows. "Some stupid shit," he finally drawled.

I opened my mouth to retort at his smart ass answer, but figured two could play the game. "Yeah," I replied with a light shrug. "Me too."

Another tense silence fell…and not used to dealing with such 'quietness', I decided to engage him in conversation again. "So…eh…is there a place for girls here?"

He raised a brow in confusion. "Huh?"

"Girls…chicks…babes?" I laughed a little. "You forgotten what those look like?"

"What kind of a dumbass question is that?"

I smirked as if sharing a secret. "I met this really hot chick on the bus on the way here. I tell you, she is…" I whistled and lay back on the bed, hands beneath my head as I closed my eyes and pictured the girl with the porcelain skin. "She was _fine_. I hope they don't do anything weird to her though."

"That's impossible," Shikamaru answered.

"What's impossible?"

"Girls are not allowed here," came the bored reply. "You must have seen a guy who looked like a girl. No more. No less. There are many of them around here, so it's easy to get confused."

I could feel my cheeks beginning to burn with a convoluted mish-mash of conflicting emotions ranging from embarrassment to anger to disbelief to…well…no _fucking way_!

"It was a girl," I mumbled angrily; hoping what he was suggesting wasn't actually true. The very notion that I could have been…that my heart could have been…

_Oh God. I need to throw up._

Shikamaru – the evil bastard – smirked. He really was enjoying watching me suffer. "What did this 'girl' look like?"

"None of your fucking business," I growled.

But he wasn't done yet. "Black hair? Skin sort of like…pale…?"

Something in my expression must have given it away, because he burst into laughter. "What's so funny?" I hissed; though my entire body was now burning with humiliation. I hoped to goodness he wouldn't go around spreading the rumor that I might be one of 'those guys'. It was the last thing I needed.

"Oh, you'll see," he replied cryptically, and though I wanted to find out more about this mystery 'girl' who was not actually a girl after all, the door opened to reveal a bespectacled man, who looked no older than us. Dressed in royal purple kimono, with a stethoscope around his neck, he must have been coming from another patient's room because he looked a bit frazzled. Even his silver pony-tailed hair was in slight disarray.

"And what's his problem?" Kabuto – I'm guessing - asked with a quick glance at me and then Shikamaru.

"His feet."

Kabuto sighed heavily, motioned for Shikamaru to get off the stool, and dragged it closer to the bed before sitting on it. For the next ten minutes, the man was an efficient machine, which was admirable besides the fact that his hands were as cold as fucking ice. His only orders were for Shikamaru to get whatever supplies he needed, and after washing my feet with what felt like liquid fire, wads of bandages were applied and a curt instruction not to put too much pressure on them because he sure as hell wasn't going to work on these things again.

He was out before I could even muster up a 'thanks for nothing'.

"Geez, what's his problem?" I grumbled as Shikamaru helped me off the bed after assisting me into the pair of straw slippers provided.

"Can't blame him. He's the lead doctor here." He balled up the sheets I had stained with my blood and dumped it into a corner of the room.

"A kid like that?"

"He might look like a kid, but he's older than us…and smarter too. This way, Blondie."

"My name's Naruto."

"So what?"

"Don't call me Blondie, jackass."

"Shut up, moron."

But he was smiling a little, and I knew then that I had at least made a (tentative) friend in this dump.

"So what's this pit all about?" I asked as he led me down the now empty cave corridor of horror.

"Hmm…consider it a briefing room," Shikamaru explained. "You just get to see the head honcho and he welcomes you before purification begins."

That word again. 'Purification'.

"And are you purified?" I asked with a sneer.

Shikamaru threw me a glance over his shoulder. "I'm still here, aren't I?"

_What the hell did that mean?_

We made a turn and were immediately met with two of the robed guards who nodded to Shikamaru before pushing open the heavy oak doors into what could only be described as an underground auditorium. Only there were no seats for the audience. In the 'bowel' of the room, all the new prisoners stood around waiting; some muttering to themselves or sharing muted conversation with their fellow inmates. Towering above the bowel, were storied alcoves – nearly ten feet high! - where guards stood like sentry watching over us in silence. The older inmates – like Shikamaru – stood in a line on the first level as if not wanting to contaminate themselves with the new breed of sinners.

I limped my way into the pit to join the others, and as if they had been waiting specifically for me to arrive, the ground beneath our feet suddenly gave way to send us neck deep into water that nearly blocked my airways.

_Can't breathe! Can't breathe! Can't fucking breathe!_

There were screams of terror as the icy needles of the water pierced our skins. Panic-filled prisoners thrashed about in an attempt to escape and in the process knocked me deeper beneath the surface.

_I'm going to die here! Jesus fucking Christ! I can't…! I just can't!_

It was with an effort that I somehow managed to find the strength to yank myself back to the surface, but it was only because the water was now receding…disappearing back into the cervices we were unaware of, and in its wake, leaving drenched, bedraggled, shivering (and a few comatose), prisoners.

Unfortunately, we were barely allowed to catch our breaths when the process was repeated again. It wasn't so much the water, but the speed at which it came at us. One minute you thought you were on dry land, the next you were sinking beneath below freezing waters, struggling to breathe. If this was 'purification' then this was the stupidest way of doing it…ever!

This happened for a total of seven 'cleansings', and by then, most of us were barely able to move, let alone function. I was flat on my back, my chest heaving in a desperate attempt to swallow much-needed gulps of hair. The rubber band that had once held my ponytail had broken apart earlier, and my hair now lay plastered upon my head and cheeks like limp strings. The pathetic kimono was stuck to my body like a second skin. I was so cold that I was numb all over. I couldn't feel anything, and I yet I was in agony.

"For sinners such as yourselves, this is only the beginning of your journey to salvation."

The voice seemed to come from everywhere, and through hooded lashes, I struggled to make sense of its exact location.

"You are all children of sin," the voice continued as I staggered to one knee and squinted to look above me.

_There_. On the top most level was a tall, skinny man who was a pale as a sheet with hair of darkest night that seemed to go down to his waist. He was dressed in a long robe of gold and black, and in his left hand was a staff with its head shaped like that of a serpent. There was something decidedly creepy and revolting about the 'leader', and it was all I could do to control the shudder of disgust that ran down my spine.

However, it was the person standing by his side that had me doing a double take and catching my breath for a whole other reason.

Her…him…that…that…_person!_

That person being the 'girl' I had crushed on for a few hours. That 'girl' who was now dressed in the black colors of the hateful watchdogs - the elite forces I had once hoped to become as a child - complete with his swords and guns; looking for all the world like he belonged. I felt my blood begin to boil with fury; perhaps more at myself for being such a fool and allowing myself to get caught up in the notion of him being a member of the opposite sex. Oooh the shame! The…HUMILIATION. Or maybe it was because I realized he was not one-of-us after all.

And perhaps he knew that as well, for though he was seemingly miles away from me – in his lofty position - I knew he could see me; that he _recognized_ me, for a slow smug smirk came to his lips as his master rambled on.

_Welcome to hell, Uzumaki Naruto,_ those dark knowing eyes seemed to say. _This is your new reality._


	2. 02: BlueEyed Sinner

**Author Notes: **Well, thanks to the four of you who took the time to leave a comment on the first chapter! I really appreciate it! Hallo Sean! :D Not guaranteeing that this will be another 21-day wonder story like the other one *lol* But I will try to update as often.

Also please note that the dead shall come to life in this story; meaning that some characters who might have kicked the bucket in the manga/anime will be alive and well in this tale.

So without further ado...enjoy! And as always your comments are very much encouraging and appreciated.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 02:<strong>

** Blue-Eyed Sinner**

_I feel the life is_

_Sorrowful and unbearable_

_Though_

_I can't flee away_

_Since I am not a bird_

_- Yamanoue no Okura_

I was filthy. Sullied. Unclean.

My feet could not walk fast enough, and I was almost tempted to run toward the temple as my skin seemed to crawl with unseen insects; digging and burrowing their way into my very pores and festering like maggots beneath the surface. It took a lot of self-control not to begin scratching or clawing at my flesh in repugnance. I _needed_ to be cleansed and quickly.

"Welcome back, my child."

_Shit!_

I almost always forgot that the old geezer sat at the side of the temple steps; so primeval, wizened and motionless, he had literally become a part of the scenery. Of course it helped that it was nighttime, and anyone else could have made the same mistake of nearly stepping on him in their haste. His gray robes and shaved head blended so well with the ancient stone walls, I wondered how much longer it would be for a statue to be erected in _his_ honor. It would fit in nicely with the other numerous carvings that could be found on the grounds. Taking a deep breath to control my thudding heart, I knelt before him and closed my eyes just as he began muttering the familiar chants and prayers.

_Sin is our enemy._

The sound of the _kakei_ hitting the stone basin coupled with the priest's musical incantations, were almost soothing to my troubled thoughts. I barely heard him lift the copper scoop and dip it into the blessed waters, but did manage to stop myself from shuddering as it was soon poured on my head.

The chill seeped into my bones. Icy cold, but necessary.

_Through his grace can we be redeemed._

You could not wipe your face while the water cascaded down to your chest and soaked your clothes. It was considered impolite and against the will of Buddha. And at the geezer's quiet command for me to begin ablutions, I was finally allowed to lift my lashes to begin the ritual. Still on my knees, I moved towards the wooden basin where I washed my face, hands, and rinsed my mouth, while repeating the necessary prayers beneath my breath.

_We are but fallen creatures, and our spiritual life on earth is warfare._

"You may enter the temple now."

Thanking him with clasped hands and a low bow, I rose to my feet and made my way into the impressive house of worship; a stupendous piece of architecture that was supposedly designed by one of my ancestors. Tonight – and on most nights – it was extremely quiet yet hauntingly beautiful. From the moment you walked past the two house-sized lion statues at the top of the stairs and stepped through the massive red and gold doors, you were presented with an elegant indoor courtyard as large as several rice fields where at its very head sat one of the largest golden statues of Buddha in the country. It must have been at least ten feet tall for it did seem to overwhelm you at first sight. Surrounding it were the most beautiful flowers of all shapes, sizes and colors, over a thousand lit candles, and little gifts left by the locals as offerings after their prayers. The very floor, you walked on, was made of the finest marble and granite; sometimes giving one the illusion of tiny diamonds sparkling especially during the day. Rumor had it that over a thousand artisans had slaved over each piece for over a year, and I wouldn't have been surprised if that was the truth. Stone pillars, on which were etched stories of warriors from long ago, seemed to rise to the heavens for the roof was just that high. That in itself was another marvel of ancient Japanese artistry and design. As a child, I recalled sitting in the middle of the courtyard as the sun filtered through the wooden slats for windows, staring hungrily at the ceiling with its paintings of brave and great Uchiha warriors. I wanted to become a part of history. I wanted to one day have my name carved into the stone walls of the temple and to be recognized for my immeasurable contributions to my clan's legacy.

_What legacy?_ Came the sudden but low voice of bitterness at the back of my mind. _You know you have nothing left, so why bother?_

"Welcome back, Sasuke-sama," came the quiet greeting that had me stopping in my tracks – at least for a moment.

Kneeling and bowing so low, that all I could see was his waist-length raven hair, my personal page had appeared before I was even aware of his presence. Damn his knack for doing such things. I gave an inward sigh and tried to step around him.

"Is my dinner and bath ready?" I asked as I made my way to one of the smaller altars to light a candle, signifying my return to the temple.

"Yes, my Lord. Do you need me to…?"

"I'll be fine without your help, Haku...for now," I interrupted with a curt nod to the boy, who by this time had risen to his feet. I swear he looked more like a girl with each passing day. It didn't help that he was in a pastel-colored kimono, something our 'great leader' had ordered the pages to wear anyway. Haku, in particular, seemed to garner the attention of those men who entertained effeminate boys as sleeping companions for his beauty was the talk of the community. I shuddered to think of how many filthy old men had taken advantage of him over the years, but who was I to feel sorry for him? After all, when I was younger, I had suffered through such advances.

_Shun all desires of the flesh._

It was a mantra I took to heart after spending a month, at Ryoan-Ji, studying under the great priests of the holy temple. According to the Great Book, the flesh had its temptations, but once you were pure of heart and soul and cleansed of all earthly desires, you had the power to resist no matter what came your way. Perhaps that was why no one dared attempt to touch me after my return. I welcomed no physical contact unless absolutely necessary…like say the apprehension of sinners while on duty….or Haku's assistance when getting dressed.

Otherwise, if anyone dared to lay a finger on me…they barely lived to see the next day.

Dinner was a quick affair as I knew I had a lot to do this evening. As Haku served me, I engaged in polite conversation; or rather he did most of the talking while I 'hmmd' and nodded where necessary. On a particularly lazy night, he'd serenade me with his _shamisen_, but even he knew that tonight was not conducive for a performance.

Thanking him for a good meal, I immediately made my way into one of the many caverns that graced Byaku-Shinkyou, where a private _onsen_ waited patiently for my return.

It was my haven away from it all; my thinking place if you will. In here, I could focus on my thoughts and grade myself on how well any particular day went in regard to my work. Did I apprehend enough sinners? Did I record each one's sin appropriately and exact the appropriate punishment? Were they worth saving through purification? Or did they deserve to go through the darker ritual of Gudan?

After a quick bath, it was with blissful gratitude that I waded into the soothing waters; its temperature just hot enough to open my pores and complete the purification process. The crawling sensation of disgust I had felt from the moment I entered that bus, was wiped away as I closed my eyes and finally allowed my mind to wander.

Ah, you must forgive my rudeness for not introducing myself properly. My name is Uchiha Sasuke. I am nineteen years old and first captain of the elite watchdogs; a police force created by my ancestors and a role we have taken seriously until this day. We were the harbingers of peace and stability; the voice of authority that was looked up to and respected. There was a certain pleasure one derived from patrolling the streets and knowing you struck either fear or admiration from those you met.

Power can be quite intoxicating.

Unfortunately, if there was one part of my 'official' duties that I loathed with a passion, it was the unnecessary trips to and from bus stations around the country to monitor the new crop of sinners. It was a tedious task in more ways than one, all thanks to Orochimaru's 'brilliant' idea of surveillance. I knew he was only using me – no, not just me per se – but the members of my clan for our _special_ abilities. You see, we Uchihas have been blessed with the gift of _sight_ and in some cases, _foresight_. You could relate it to being a psychic, but it was much more than that. We could see the truth within a person's heart especially if they were sinners. It allowed for us to weed out those who would be purified and those who would be taken in for Gudan. In a way, it made us formidable; this ability to place judgment on a person from just the way he spoke or behaved.

However, thanks to the way we were being used these days, it was an ability I was beginning to hate just as much as the trips I was forced to take. It had come to a point where just getting a knock on my door, signaling another meeting with Orochimaru, almost always had me gritting my teeth with simmering fury.

_We are really nothing more than instruments to him._

On that cool afternoon of my assignment, I had knelt before him in his living quarters – which was actually a large room where he conducted his daily businesses - hands clenched tightly into fists on my thighs as I watched him read the scroll on which was listed bus stations we (I was flanked by two other members of my clan) were to head off to next.

It was always the same with this man; the waiting as he took his sweet time before getting his damn point across. It was an opportunity to really appraise him, to take stock of a man I hoped to kill someday.

No one was sure of how old he was, for he looked exactly as he did when I was first introduced to him almost fourteen years ago. He wasn't particularly tall, but his choice of clothing – mostly robes that emphasized his lanky build – gave the illusion of being majestic and intimidating. His skin was so pale, it was practically white. I did know he had a fetish for the geisha lifestyle, and there were times when he'd powder up himself to appear even more ghost-like, but otherwise his flesh was translucent and quite baby smooth to the touch; a grotesque anomaly. I believed it was his eyes that were his most mesmerizing feature. Slit and akin to those of snakes, they could flash a dark shade of green when extremely upset, or fade into pale ambers when aroused or pleased. There was a constant hunger within them; a fervor that could devour you if you stared into them for too long. If we Uchihas had the gift of sight, then Orochimaru had the gift and then some. It was extremely difficult to read his thoughts, but he almost always seemed to know exactly what _you_ were thinking, and many a time had he mocked me with his predictions on what I would do next. It made my role of acting as his pawn even more difficult. I knew he was no fool. He must have realized how much I loathed his very presence as much as he needed me.

It would be a slow death, I decided; the kind where I'd torture him until he literally begged for his life to be extinguished and even then I wouldn't give him the luxury. However, I knew this was something I could not accomplish rashly. I would bide my time until the moment was right.

But dear gods, it was becoming harder every single day, and I realized that my fury towards him and those he surrounded himself with, was only transferred to the sinners that trudged through those gates on a daily basis. To me, they were nothing more than commodities – expendable commodities – hardly worth my time. For their crimes and sins, they deserved whatever they received. For each sentence of death I delivered, it was his face I saw in their place.

Yes indeed, a slow and pain -

"Toshu-gu," came the quiet statement that jerked me out of my bitter thoughts.

I raised a brow in confusion; wondering if I had heard correctly. "I beg your pardon?"

"Lord Orochimaru said you would be going to Toshu-gu," came the softly-spoken, yet snide reply from the white-haired man who was literally Orochimaru's shadow.

Kaguya Kimimaro - another beautiful young man whom Orochimaru favored in more ways than one.

I curled my lips into a sneer, which was rewarded with a smirk on his lips. I watched as he knelt beside his seated master and poured some more tea into the empty cup. His actions were genteel…effeminate. He spoke very little and when he did, it was always in something regarding Orochimaru's commands. Dressed as Haku, in a light blue kimono that revealed his pale, hairless chest whenever he moved, I sighed inwardly at the tell tale bruises on his chest; evidence of yet another 'passionate' encounter with his master. It was enough to make me hurl at the thought of what activities the men engaged in. However, for all his attempts to act like the submissive partner, Kimimaro was one of the strongest fighters I have ever met. For many years, he had been my sparring partner at the dojo, and I could tell you first hand how painful his blows could be whether it be in kendo or in taijustu. I was yet to officially kick his ass, which was why he could act like this to me.

"Toshu-gu…is in the South," I stated firmly; hoping they would realize that it was going to be a two-day journey…four days in total. I was definitely not ready to spend four days on some filthy bus filled with sinners I'd love to kill with my bare hands.

"Yes, it is," Orochimaru agreed; finally looking up to give me a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. "Kidoumaru tells me that the new crop of sinners need immediate purification. The stench of their sins…their very presence pollutes the air of the sacred land."

My skin was already beginning to crawl. "Yes, but why -"

Orochimaru – who had been resting his chin on a raised palm (as if in boredom all this time) - held up his free hand, which revealed long black-polished fingernails that seemed to gleam beneath the light.

"Before you begin complaining, my dear one, remember your oath as an elite first captain." He licked his lips slowly with that long tongue that always made me shudder with revulsion. "You have to lead by example, or have you already forgotten that little fact?"

_I'll cut out his tongue first. That's what I'll do. Cut it out, dangle it in front of his eyes and watch him choke on his blood – _

"I have not forgotten," I said aloud, bowing my head in submission and apology for my rudeness.

It was with bitterness that I began my journey. It was with anger that I suffered through forty-eight hours of absolute boredom on my way there; only allowing myself to be occupied with a booklet of passages from the Great Book. It was with trepidation that I stepped out of the bus once it arrived at the station, and my abhorrence was complete when I saw the officers I'd be traveling with let alone the pathetic group of men who were doomed for whatever fate had in store for them.

I went through my duties quickly; introducing myself to Officers Abumi Zaku and Momochi Zabuza, before going through the list with them over a barely edible lunch. I had heard of Zabuza's reputation, but never actually seen him up close and personal. He was ruthless and unforgiving of those who sinned against the High One. His sense of righteousness put him on a pedestal, where he believed sinners were not worth his time. I would approve of his zealousness in purification and the purging of such filth, but there was something about his personality that put me off completely. Zaku, on the other hand, seemed to only want to ride on Zabuza's coattails; wiling to do anything to make his commander happy. What a brown-noser.

As I sat in the dingy, hot office reading names and signing beside each one in acknowledgment, I could vaguely hear the sounds of conductors, officers, and prisoners being ushered into waiting buses. We watchdogs were situated all over the country and Byaku-Shinkyou could be considered the headquarters. In the beginning, only members of the Uchiha clan could actually become officers, however, the times had changed and now anyone who was worthy of wearing the black colors signed up. It was not an easy process. Getting accepted into the force was a year long rigorous test of mental, physical and emotional strength, so one couldn't really blame those who did get accepted for being so smug and big-headed. It was one of the most honorable professions anyone could brag about.

_Rokushou Aoi – 34 - Multiple burglary, sodomy, gambler_

_Shigure – 22 - gambling, shoplifting_

_Oboro – 17 – car theft, alcoholic, in debt_

_Mubi – 18 – car theft, alcoholic, in debt_

Apparently Oboro and Mubi were related. Typical. I rolled my eyes at the stupidity of some of the crimes listed. Petty thievery, gambling, alcoholism. All vices that would be purified once they got to Byaku-Shinkyou. However, the crimes began to get worse as the list continued:

_Kagari – 42 - multiple rapes, sodomy, alcoholism, drug trafficking_

_Hidan – 25 - drug trafficking, human trafficking, multiple rapes, serial murderer_

Good grief. Did these people have no shame? And yet, there was at least one person on the list who looked like he hadn't done a lot:

_Uzumaki Naruto – 19 – first-degree murder_

Not murders – with an 's' – but just a lone murder. Poor bastard. I'd almost feel sorry for him if it wasn't for the gravity of his sin. The taking of another life when not chosen for the purging rites of Gudan was unforgivable. This Uzumaki Naruto did not deserve to live.

As for the journey back home, let's just say it was one of the worst yet. Usually my trips took a day or less, so I was lucky not to deal with too much. I could withstand sitting beside a sinner and keeping my mouth shut for the duration of the trip. If they did try to engage in conversation, a cold glare usually did the trick or I'd pretend to be mute and deaf. I chose the mute and deaf routine for this particular journey, but I wondered if I should have done more with some of the things I witnessed. For instance, slapping Zabuza for his blatant abuse of power. I knew it was a tactic to get the sinners to be more submissive, but there were other ways of wielding such authority. The beating was unnecessary and made me furious. However, I knew I could not give my position away, though I made a vow to make note of his foolish act.

In addition, there was something else that had bothered – well not so much bothered, but irritated me during the trip. It was the blond-haired, blue-eyed young man with the whiskered scars. I made it a point of duty not to associate names with faces, as it gave the illusion that I cared for these scums of the earth. It was the worst thing you could do as an officer. You had to maintain a certain distance if you hoped to perform your duties well. Even engaging in one-on-one conversation – no matter how little – could be the difference between doing an excellent job and finishing with a sub par performance. Needless to say anything below excellent was not in my vocabulary.

For starters, individuals with blue eyes were a rarity in these parts, and I had only heard of one clan – while pouring through the history books – that had members with such eye color. Did that make them special? Not particularly, but it was definitely uncommon. His were the first pair of blue eyes I had ever seen, and even from where I sat, they reminded me of azure skies on a beautiful summer day at Byaku especially whenever I went hiking around the mountains. _Breathtaking._

…the scenery, not his eyes. So we are not confused as to what I am trying to say.

Secondly, I did not like the way he seemed to keep staring at me whenever possible. It conjured up memories of the many men that Orochimaru entertained at his private parties; men who would want me as a companion for their trips back to their homelands or to keep their beds warm. I was lucky in that Orochimaru wanted to groom me for himself, for he always laughed and told the sick fools that I was not to be touched or taken.

However, unlike those men whose eyes were filled with fetid hunger, this blue-eyed sinner's gaze was…dare I say …warm and inviting. It sickened me to think that in addition to whatever existing sin he had committed, he was also trying to engage in one of the worst. _Homosexuality._ It was one of the reasons I hated Orochimaru, for here he was preaching about purging and purification of such sins, when he was the number one culprit of said sin! He had justified his actions by using the high priests as back up for his acts. His choices in bed fellows were only made possible by visions from above. For him to be strong in his faith, the weakness of the flesh had to be appeased; not with the flesh of the weaker sex (females), but strengthened by the communion with the male form.

_There is a beauty in such couplings,_ Orochimaru had tried to convince me. _You achieve a state of nirvana; a peak of knowledge when you finally give up yourself to someone who can truly understand you. There is a merging of souls; a communication of minds through the touch and feel of flesh upon flesh in the most intimate of ways_. Though, he insisted, that the acts of the sinners brought to Byaku were selfish and filthy for they did not purify themselves before and after the act.

_So purification makes it okay to engage in sodomy?_ I had asked with as much sarcasm and skepticism as I could muster.

And the simple answer to that? Yes.

_Bullshit._

He was making excuses, and he knew it.

I was never more grateful for my month stay at the temple. My eyes and heart were more than enlightened, and I did not need to engage in revolting acts of sexual intercourse – with male or female – to achieve nirvana.

"Sasuke-sama?"

I was startled into alertness with my lashes flying open at the sound of the soft voice. I had completely forgotten I was still soaking all this time. It was Haku again, on his knees beside the onsen and with a concerned expression on his visage.

"You were in here for such a long time, I was getting worried," he added as I gave a nod of understanding as well as a small smile of reassurance.

"I'm fine. I guess I was more tired than I thought."

"Orochimaru-sama has sent for you," he said quietly. "Do I tell him you're still taking a bath?"

Great. Reporting time. I sighed heavily and stood up to begin wading out of my sanctuary. "I'll see him now. No use delaying the inevitable."

"Yes, my Lord."

I accepted the towel he provided, hardly feeling ashamed that he was seeing me in the nude. He has been my personal page for over a year now, so he was already used to this. In my private quarters, which was a rather large room, but contained only a futon that was neatly made and my writing desk on which sat a photograph of my family.

Once dried, I knelt before the mirror Haku had set up, allowing him to groom me in readiness to meet Orochimaru before we headed off to the pit for the purification process. As he rubbed some sweet-smelling oils on my skin with an expertise that never failed to amaze me, I stared at my reflection with a light frown.

_My family._

I no longer had a family.

In an unforeseen attack on the Byaku-Shinkyou – when I was about seven years old – my parents were murdered brutally before my eyes. How had I been spared? Only because of my mother's quick thinking as she had hidden me in the basement just in time, for no sooner had she shut the trap door did those heathens burst in to execute her in cold blood.

I could still feel the hot drops of my mother's blood seeping through the wooden panels and onto my forehead and cheeks, but I dared not cry out for I knew I would be caught, and I was too much of a coward to fight at the time. I knew my older brother had gone out to fight, but he too never returned, and so I assumed that he had been killed – his body then burned like the other members of our community who had dared to put up any resistance.

For two long days, the battle raged on, and I could only remain in my hiding place like a frightened mouse; caught between crying and begging for death to take me. In fits of sleep, the cruel images of my father being shot repeatedly; his body dancing like that of a frenzied puppet before collapsing to the ground, haunted me. I was lucky not to see my mother being decapitated, but the sound of her head falling and rolling on the floor was enough to have me screaming silently for many years to come. I didn't even want to think of my brother's death or to compare the putrid stench of burning bodies to him.

It just didn't make any sense. What had my parents done to deserve that? Byaku-Shinkyou had always been a peaceful place for members of the community to worship or go to the dojo or to celebrate festivals. We were well-loved by everyone so why did that have to happen? _Why? _It was a question I'd keep asking myself even 'til this day.

I was eventually discovered by a surviving member of my clan – almost three days after the fights had stopped (I was still unable to leave even when I could see and hear nothing after those initial two days of fighting). I was severely dehydrated and in need of food. Too weak to even think of much, I could only remember seeing that long, pale face belonging to Orochimaru leaning over me with a sad smile and tears in his eyes.

"You poor thing," he had said. "To have to witness such ugliness. It breaks my heart."

He had caressed my cheek and planted a cold kiss on my forehead. "Not to worry, my dear Sasuke. I will continue your father's legacy and rejuvenate Byaku-Shinkyou. It will become a place of purification for the sins of those who have done this grave injustice to your family. We will punish all those who dare to raise a hand against the will of the Great One. This will be our new role as the watchdogs of this country..._your_ new role. Do you accept it?"

I must have agreed because his words hit me harder than I would have thought. He was right. He was so damn right. _The sinners._ It was all their fault. My life had been ruined because of those bastards. A community that had once been peaceful and welcoming to outsiders had been destroyed by a bunch of ungrateful, filthy scums of the earth.

They all deserved to die. Every last one of them.

"Your arms, Sasuke-sama."

I rose to my feet and held them out to the sides on autopilot; allowing Haku to slip the black kamishimo over my head and to smooth the sleeves down my arms.

I would later learn that Orochimaru had sent his army of fighters to curb the uprising, and since my brother wasn't around to take over the role as head of the Byaku-Shinkyou, and I was still just a kid, Orochimaru had installed himself as the leader with the blessings of several daimyo. It turned out that over eighty percent of my clan had been eliminated in those two days; not just here, but in different uprisings all over the country. It was as if whoever had planned the attacks had hoped to cripple the power of the Uchiha, and they had succeeded…for the most part.

For those of us who still existed, we knew we owed our lives to him now. It was a knowledge he was quick to point out whenever we dared go against him for anything.

And goodness knows it always left a bitter taste in my mouth.

Done with my uniform, Haku now knelt before me with his head bowed and arms outstretched as he presented my two swords. Though I had the option of attaching my pistol, I preferred not to use that weapon. It felt too bulky...too noisy. I was more comfortable with my blades, and as I tucked them within my obi, I felt more in control though one thought continued to plague me even as I slipped my sock-clad feet into my slippers.

_Byaku-Shinkyou was rightfully mine. _

And yet I could do absolutely nothing about it. Orochimaru's power exceeded beyond the gates of the community. He had the backings of the lords and the emperor himself, I'm sure. If I even thought of starting an uprising, I knew he would not hesitate to eliminate the rest of us. Whether I liked it or not, I was now considered the head of the once proud Uchiha clan, and whatever move I made now would be scrutinized with much intensity and suspicion.

I had to play my cards right, and continue to bide my time.

"Welcome back," he greeted as I knelt before him once ushered into his private domain. I winced inwardly for though he had said I could enter, he was still being dressed by Kimimaro. The last thing I wanted to see was Orochimaru naked. As if I needed any more horrific images to fill my mind.

"All the sinners have been accounted for," I stated flatly; keeping my eyes firmly on the low writing desk with its sheets of documents he must have been going through earlier.

"And how was the journey?"

"Momochi Zabuza must be reprimanded."

"Oh?" It was a drawled word tinged with amusement, which let me know that he must have already known what had happened. I looked up and was not disappointed to see the expression on his visage. He was literally grinning with mischievous intent.

I grit my teeth and forced myself to continue. "The officer abused his power, and I feel he ought to be reminded of ways to deal with sinners at the right time and the right place."

"I see."

He smoothed out the robe – which was of a heavy black material like brocade adorned with gold embroidery. He moved towards an ornate stool - his feet barely audible on the tatami mat – and peered at his reflection in the mirror while Kimimaro began to brush his hair in gentle strokes. The worship on the white-haired man's face was irritating. I'd bet if Orochimaru told him to go hang himself from the great oak tree at the front of the temple while completely naked, Kimimaro would gladly do so without bothering to ask why. Talk about blind devotion.

"Would you like to be the one in charge of reprimanding him, Sasuke? You look like you're eager to do so."

I didn't want to, but with how annoyed I felt right now, I was willing to bring some pain to someone. "If you want me to."

This response elicited a loud laugh from the older man. "If I want you to," he repeated before eyeing me with amusement. "You are so easy to read, my dear one. Now tell me…any of the sinners in particular interest you?"

_The blue-eyed sinner._

I blinked at the sudden random image of the blond one and shook my head in dismissal. "No one in particular."

Orochimaru's lips quirked a little. "Really? So they all deserve the purification rites?"

"A few deserve Gudan," I said carefully, trying to remember which ones my 'eyes' had noted as possible candidates for the purging festival.

What was Gudan, you might ask? Consider it the next step from purification rites. It was a festival held in the community where sinners who were beyond purification and forgiveness were made to perform several death-defying acts before being released from their worldly attachments…by public execution.

Depending on which daimyo was invited to be entertained, executions could range from beheading to firing squads; anything to get the fans (locals) excited. My first act of Gudan had come when I was twelve-years-old. It was the first time I had ever beheaded a human being, and though I had been scared shitless at the notion of missing (and goodness knows I had practiced long and hard by slicing off melons for hours on end), it had all gone rather smoothly. I confess that I did almost pass out at the sight of the stump left after the head had rolled into the pit (you could still see veins and vessels pumping with blood), but as the crowd had roared and began to chant my name; exhilaration and a sense of accomplishment had taken over.

Though I didn't partake in the festivities all the time, a part of me had come to enjoy my chosen role as executor; for in that moment…when the doubt would creep in and my heart would waver…all I had to do was think of my parents and brother…

And then nothing else mattered.

"It will be a good night for purification, don't you think, Sasuke?" came the question that jarred me from my thoughts.

I nodded absently and fought hard not to cringe as Orochimaru walked up to cup my chin gently. I suffered the abrasive texture of his fingernail tracing my cheek and then my lips tenderly. I could hear his breathless sigh of longing, and a part of me rejoiced at his physical anguish. He _wanted_ me, but did not know how to _reach_ me. Kimimaro on the other hand, could only scowl in displeasure at his master/lover's betrayal. Must suck knowing the man you loved wanted to bed others while you watched helplessly.

"Shall we, my dear?" Orochimaru invited with a final caress of my lips before turning away to reach for his staff. "The sinners await."

We followed his gliding form; and I say gliding because he seemed to walk that way. You could not see his feet – thanks to the robes – and he literally appeared to be walking on air. As we stepped into the much cooler confines of the caves that would literally lead us into the bowels of the earth (it wasn't called 'the pit' for nothing), we walked past a seemingly endless row of guards, who had to bow in recognition of their master.

Waiting just at the doors leading into the underground venue were two other high-ranking officers Sakon and Ukon – twin brothers who had been in service for Orochimaru since they were children apparently. They bowed in greeting and held open the doors for us, where we had a bird's eye view of the den of iniquity below us.

No matter how many times I had been in this cave over the years, the effect was still the same. For though Orochimaru had built this himself; stating it was the first step for these lost souls to begin repentance, Nature had done most of the work. Massive stalagmites (which tended to give an ethereal glow when the lanterns were doused) dangled stiffly from the roofs of the cave or erected from beneath one's feet. There was a dank smell of ancient rocks; thanks to the countless purification rites over the years. Unseen underground pipes were designed to spout water at a speed of over 30 miles per hour; hard enough to knock the wind out of your sails. If you were lucky to survive it, you deserved to be purged of your sins. However, it went without saying that we had lost a few sinners over the years just from this rite alone, while some had severe injuries. Either way…it was a necessary evil. It _had_ to be done.

Below, they milled about like zombies; dazed, confused, and unsure of what was to happen next. I almost felt that pang of pity for them. However, there was something …or rather _someone_ missing. Perhaps it was because he was the only blond on the bus or perhaps it was because of those eyes which would have been noticeable from way up here.

_Where was he?_

"There is someone missing," I whispered just as Orochimaru was about to give the signal to the guard in charge of turning on the water system.

Orochimaru raised a brow of consternation and eyed the pit below. "There is? Perhaps he didn't make it."

That would be a shame if that was the truth. I knew the walk from the entrance to the pit was incredibly long especially if you had been denied food and water for two days, but he hadn't seemed that weak on arrival. A part of me had hoped that he would have survived long enough for the ritual of Gudan. The pleasure of loping off his head was becoming more appetizing by the minute.

"Ah, I think that is him now?" Sakon motioned with a finger as we all turned back to notice the latecomers. One was already a purified member of the community, whose name I did not care to know, and the other was the blue-eyed sinner whose name I did not want to know either.

He was limping, so that might have been the problem – all the same, he had barely settled into the pit, with the others, when Orochimaru gave the command and all hell promptly broke loose.

Their screams of terror, fear, and pain bounced off the sacred stone walls and echoed hauntingly with the rushing sound of water. Imagine if you will a waterfall suddenly being unleashed in such tight confines. It was mesmerizing with its intensity. I watched dispassionately as they selfishly tried to drown the other in an attempt to survive, and though I wanted to keep them all in my sights, I still found myself eager to see how the blue-eyed sinner would manage. At first, he seemed taken by surprise at the first douse of water, but he proved to be quite adept at managing to control his breathing the sixth time around. Unfortunately, even the strongest of men would eventually crumble, and I was disappointed at how pathetic he looked when it was all over.

Had I actually been rooting for him in some way? Perhaps. I did not want him to die just yet. My goal of being his final executor was firmly implanted in my mind now. I would speak to Orochimaru about it. I wanted to be a part of the Gudan festivities this year and that hunger was fueled by what he did next.

_Fascinating._

Usually at this stage, no one had the strength to even move a muscle even as Orochimaru rambled on about the purification rites, but this man…this man was _different_. While others lay spent and defeated, I could see his stubborn determination to at least get onto one knee. However, it was the expression on his features... in those blue eyes – that were now darkened – which had me smiling in appreciation of his feelings at the moment.

_Anger. _

Sweet. Beautiful _fury_. I could practically taste it from here. It oozed off him in a wave that seemed to scorch me; eliciting an excitement I had once thought jaded over the years.

_Yes._ I wanted him to feel every bit of it. I wanted him to realize just what awaited him in Byaku-Shinkyou. If he thought he could get away with his sin in the outside world, in here, I would assist in making him pure again as he prepared for his journey to his next life.

_Not to worry, you blue-eyed sinner. I promise to make your death as painless as possible. _


	3. 03: Soliloquy

**Notes: **My sincere thanks again for your comments! *bows gratefully* As always they are very much appreciated. Enjoy!

**P.S:** I don't have to keep putting up whatever pairings show up in each chapter, do I? =/ I honestly think it's a pain in the tushie. Either way, there will be some het pairings/situations showing up, so be warned! :D

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><p><strong>Chapter 03: <strong>

**Soliloquy**

_things don't die or remain damaged__  
><em>_but return: stumps grow back hands,__  
><em>_a head reconnects to a neck,__  
><em>_a whole corpse rises blushing and newly elastic.__  
><em>_Later this vision is not True:__  
><em>_the grandmother remains dead__  
><em>_not hibernating in a wolf's belly._

_-Kimiko Hahn_

Her hair smelled like fresh roses, and when I buried my face within the soft pink strands, her giggles of pleasure were like music to my ears. I reveled in that sound; wrapping an arm around her slender frame to pull her tighter against me. Her breathless sigh let me know that she was becoming aroused again, and who was I to deny the love of my life the opportunity to use me as much as she wanted.

_Naruto,_ she moaned when I found that pleasurable mound of heat between her legs all over again. _Naruto…Naruto…_

_Sakura,_ I groaned and buried myself so deep I could go no further. She felt so damn good.

With a grunt, I swiftly changed positions so she was now flat on her back; a motion which had her giggling again and calling out my name with a breathless squeak. Feeling my excitement begin to reach fever pitch, I intensified my thrusts; hoping to bring her as much pleasure as she gave me.

However…

_Look at me,_ I begged desperately as her head remained stubbornly turned towards her left. _Look at me, goddamn it!_

But she continued to ignore me, instead finding pleasure in biting a finger and absently bucking her hips to meet my frenzied motions. Was I not good enough for her? Was she simply going through the act just to please me? What the hell did she find so interesting over there? Why couldn't she give me the attention and love I deserved?

_Look at me!_

Instead, I received yet another breathless sigh. I could have been making love to a mannequin for all her enthusiasm, and it pissed me off – almost as much as I had felt when I saw her naked with that bastard…

_Why are you wasting your time with me, Naruto?_ she finally asked, and even before she turned that face to give me her full attention, I could already feel the scream building up from deep within me. I knew what I would see, but I couldn't turn away. She _wouldn't_ let me turn away.

_Do you enjoy fucking the dead, Naruto?_

Her lips parted to show a grin that had my penis shriveling with fear and revulsion, and still she wouldn't let me go. It was as if she had clamped my organ within her inner muscles like a vice and would chop it off in a second if I dared move.

_Oh God…_

_Don't you find me beautiful, Naruto? _

With half of your face blown off? I don't think so.

Blood so dark, it looked black and inky, mingled with pieces of brain matter, bits of bone and folds of flesh that dangled off the side of her face like something out of a really bad horror movie. I could see the inner workings of what was left of her once beautiful face, and with each deadening pulse of a muscle or vessel, my stomach lurched in aversion.

_I'm so sorry, Sakura. So damn sorry this had to happen to you…_

_Are you?_ She asked with a sneer; a skeletal hand – once pink and supple but now with flesh hanging around the bone like strips of cloth - reaching up to cradle my face. _I don't think so, Naruto. I think you're happy this happened to me. You were glad I was killed, weren't you? After all I cheated on you and this is what I deserve…_

No one deserves death…no one…

_Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. You are such a liar._

Sakura…please…

_You just couldn't wait for me to die long enough before moving on to someone else, eh? _

There is no one else…there will never be anyone else…

_Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. You are such a liar, Naruto, but it's okay…I'll never let you go. You know that. You and I will always be together. Always. You are mine, Naruto. Never forget that. You will always be…mine…Naruto…_

…my Naruto…

…Naruto…

…aruto…

…ruto…

…uto…

"Oy! Wake the fuck up already!"

The sudden sharp pain, of something prodding my ribs, had my lashes flying open quickly. I shied away from the offending object, wincing as my legs and lower back protested my awkward motion. Reconciling my nightmare and what reality presented took a minute longer as I blinked rapidly before rubbing my eyes which still felt as heavy as lead. I couldn't tell if it was morning or night, no thanks to my current sleeping quarters in a dungeon, miles beneath the surface of the earth. The pathetic excuse for a blanket, which was nothing more than a burlap sack that itched all over, coupled with the moth-ridden mattress so thin I could still feel the uneven rocks beneath – had been my only protection and comfort for the night.

I eyed the long wooden pole that was responsible for poking me before finally looking up to meet the amused gaze of my tormentor. He was safe behind the steel grille; a sturdy design in which you only had enough room to stick out an arm like a beggar. However, there was a little rectangular space at the bottom, which was where a flat tin pan of food was shoved toward me.

"You better eat," came the quiet advice. "You look like shit."

I lifted my middle finger in response and - though I loathed having to do this - forced myself to crawl on my hands and knees toward the meal. The soles of my feet were throbbing and I wasn't sure if I could walk on it at all, let alone do the tiptoeing routine. I reached for the pan, on which sat a lone medium-sized plain rice ball that was lukewarm and congealed. However, considering this was my unofficial first meal since…since whenever, I couldn't complain. I ate hungrily, not caring that he was watching me with acute interest. It was finished in about three bites. When I was done eating, he was kind enough to shove a small tin cup of water through the space, and just like the rice ball, it was finished in seconds.

I belched. I was still hungry.

"That's it?" I asked as I licked my fingers; despite the grime that's accumulated so far. I knew I was filthy, but this was no time for proper decorum in these conditions.

"This isn't a five-star hotel, you know."

"I noticed."

The lights from the lanterns in the hallways illuminated his features ever so often, and I had to admit that it was good to see him again. I was ridiculously close to tears for some reason.

"How long have I been down here?" I asked, clearing my throat lightly to prevent myself from sounding so gruff and emotional.

"Two days," Shikamaru replied quietly. His dark eyes scrutinized me carefully.

_Two days? How…why…?_

"They tried to bring you out yesterday, but you were running a pretty high fever and blabbing some incoherent shit. Had to talk them into leaving you alone."

He placed the stick on the ground gently, glanced behind him and then side to side as if making sure the coast was clear, before digging into his kimono. "I got something for your feet. Swiped it from Kabuto's office when he wasn't looking."

He held up a small tube of some medication which he slid through the opening. I dove for it and hid it within my kimono just as quickly.

"You might be getting an infection," he explained with a soft nod. "Just rub it every now and then. Should stop it from spreading."

I eyed my feet; someone must have applied fresh bandages while I was in my comatose state. It would be easy to peel them off, apply the cream, and replace them again.

"Thanks, man," I said with utmost sincerity. I would have said more, but he was already rising to his feet with stick back in hand. He began to move, and I struggled desperately to think of some other topic of conversation that would make him stay for a while longer. I didn't want to remain in this place by myself. The loneliness alone just might kill me.

"What time is it?" I asked quickly, now crawling closer to the grille to clutch the cold bars like a lifeline.

He stopped and turned to face me again. He seemed to debate whether to keep speaking to me, but after another long minute, he finally gave me answer. "It's almost noon. That's why the dungeons are a little quiet. Most of the others are out working."

"Working?"

He nodded. "Yeah…you get to do different things until your fate is decided." He opened his mouth to say something else, but seemed to reconsider it. All the same, I could tell. There was something else he was keeping from me.

"What do you mean by fate being decided? I thought everyone got to serve the same punishment."

He sighed heavily and took a step back as if to get away from me. "Some people's sins are worse than others…that's all."

"What happens to them?" I asked, feeling my stomach begin to churn with anxiety and the cold claw of fear. "Come on, man, please tell me!"

"Keep your voice down," he hissed. "I shouldn't even be here at all. You know how much I had to pay that bastard guard just to let me see you?"

I tried to look contrite, but I was burning up now. I had to know what his cryptic words meant.

"Are they…are they going to torture me?" I finally asked in a voice that felt raw.

His lowered gaze was more than enough of an answer, and my grip on the bars tightened despite the pain of some of the bolts digging into my flesh. I bit my lower lip hard and rested my now feverish forehead against the cool steel; trying to tell myself that whatever those bastards planned for me, I could deal with it. If I could survive that stupid purification process, nothing they could throw at me could possibly be worse.

"Who's Sakura?" came the sudden question that had me looking up quickly in surprise. Shikamaru had an expression that seemed to be a conflict of pity and curiosity. It was as if he was trying not to feel too sorry for me and couldn't quite manage it.

"She…" I swallowed tightly. "She was my girlfriend…about two years ago…"

_Before she got shot by the guy she cheated on me with. _

"Was?"

"She's dead," I replied flatly, and at his raised brow, I shook my head slowly. "No…I didn't kill her…that's not why I'm here."

"Ah."

"Why do you ask?"

"You kept muttering her name," he replied before sighing heavily. "Guess that definitely tells me your mistake was honest."

_Mistake?_ What the hell was he talking about? I was confused…until I noticed the small quirk of his lips that sent the flood of color rushing to my cheeks.

_That…_

"Fuck off," I muttered in embarrassment and turned away as he chuckled and excused himself.

His soft laughter would continue to echo within my head even as I crawled towards the darker corner of the dungeon so I could tend to my wounds. It wasn't that large of a place anyway. Just about the size of my living/bedroom of my apartment. I winced as I peeled off the bandages slowly. It was hard to tell from the pitiful light from the lanterns in the corridor, but I could still see the changing hue of the bruises. They were beginning to turn a sickly shade of purple with possible pus accumulating, and if Shikamaru was right, I could be experiencing the worst kind of infection yet. Definitely something I didn't need if I was going to be tortured later.

Speaking of which…his reminder of my 'mistake' only did more to fuel my burning fury at the face of that guy…who had looked anything but girlish in his uniform that night. The fact that he was standing next to the person Shikamaru had described as the 'head honcho' made me think that the guy was probably a high-ranking official. So what was he doing spending two days with us on that hell ride? Spying? Probably. Wouldn't surprise me if he was there just to scout out the prisoners and make recommendations to his boss.

So where does that place me?

My hand stilled its rubbing motion as I was immediately hit with a dull sense of panic.

_Oh shit!_ Had I given off any weird vibes? Sure I had stolen a few glances here and there, but I never spoke to him; don't think I even gave him any real 'look' of encouragement either. I hoped to goodness I hadn't come across as someone desperate for his attention, but then again what had that look he gave me in the pit meant? It wasn't the look of someone who was all too happy to see me again. If anything, he looked pissed behind that shit-eating smile. He looked like a guy who enjoyed his role as second-in-command and all that it entailed. In short, he had all the signs and symptoms of being a first class son-of-a-bitch.

…_and you just had to go googly-eyed over him…_

"Except I thought it was a her, damn it!" I hissed to myself and continued to apply the medicine. The smell was awful; like a mixture of sulfur and rotten eggs. Still, it was working a little and as I began to put the bandages back in place, the throb was now ebbing into a state of numbness.

With nothing else to do with myself, I decided to investigate my new home…at least for now. I held onto the wall for support and struggled to my feet…only to nearly fall back to the ground as my leg muscles refused to cooperate with me. I latched onto the cool rocks and counted to ten before taking a step (on tiptoe naturally) and then another. I continued this until I came back to where I started. My cell was exactly 114 steps all around – steel grille included. I hobbled back to it and tried to look out…as far as my neck could go…which was virtually impossible. I couldn't even get my face through one of the squares. So I strained my ears and tried to listen for anything.

There were no guards – which was surprising in itself; although I had to wonder if there was one actually hidden beyond my line of sight. The corridor itself was no different from the endless one we had marched through that first night. Oil lanterns hung from hooks carved into the stones and besides the crackle of the fires within them and the occasional lonesome dripping of unseen water…I could have been the only person on the planet. Just what part of the prison was this? Was this the section reserved for murderers like me? If so, there ought to be a whole bunch of…

/Most of the others are working./

I sagged limply to the ground. I couldn't believe I was thinking this, but I would have killed to be working right about now. Even if it meant scrubbing toilets…anything to get out of this hell hole. I needed the fresh air. I needed to see other people…to talk to other people…to feel alive again…

…and to relieve myself.

And since there wasn't exactly a toilet around here…

_Sigh. _

A guy's gotta do what a guy's gotta do. Proper decorum be damned.

* * *

><p>Haruno Sakura was my one true love.<p>

At least I had thought she was for about a year and a half.

Looking back now, it was hard to believe that she could have even considered a guy like me for a boyfriend. We couldn't have been any more different or on far ends of the spectrum. It was your typical nerd meets gorgeous babe and they fall in love and live happily ever after. The only problem with that scenario was that 'happily ever after' never quite came to be after all.

I must have mentioned my difficulty in getting girls to see past my 'whiskers' and brash behavior, and it was that way for the first sixteen years of my life. I seemed to have just about everything going against me from day one. I never knew my father, and my mom passed away when I was about two or three-years-old to cholera; a disease that was floating around like crazy back then. I was born in a small fishing town near Shikoku – yep. Waaaay down South where the summers could be blistering hot and downright unbearable. We weren't exactly wealthy, and if I had any relatives; they never bothered to check up on me that's for sure. The only reason I didn't end up joining my mother on her death bed was because I was found a couple of days later by a traveling medicine-man.

The irony of it all still fills my mouth with bitterness 'til this day. If only he had showed up a week earlier, perhaps my mother would have survived.

Either way, instead of leaving me – as many others would have back then – he decided to take me to Nagasaki, where I was left in the care of his younger sister…a widower who definitely did not want to deal with an extra mouth to feed.

I was treated like trash; no other nice way of putting it. She would make me sleep outside even in the dead of winter, wouldn't let me eat with her real children and at that, I usually got the scraps or leftovers. I got hand-me-down clothes; some so torn and worn out, they barely covered me. Shoes. What shoes? I was lucky to even have a slipper to walk around in. She was always quick to remind me of my place; that I was never one of them and at no time was I to consider myself a part of her family. To be honest, it hurt…_a lot_, so what did I do to mask those feelings? I became a pain-in-the-ass to everyone especially to her 'precious' children. The little monsters – there were five of them in all, of which two were about a year older than me – were out for me too. Not one of them tried to be nice to me even when Mom wasn't home. In retaliation, I'd pull the meanest pranks I could possibly manage; cutting off the oldest son's hair while asleep, using a knife to shred some of their best clothes, putting sand in their meals, or making them do stupid things like daring the little ones to cross a river while reassuring them there was absolutely nothing wrong. Of course I would always have the last laugh when they'd run crying off to their mom, thanks to being stung by leeches.

Except my enjoyment never lasted long.

I was beaten for my antics, and I always took them with a stubborn determination not to cry in front of the kids; for they'd line up like sullen brats just waiting for me to break down. I would try to think of other things while my buttocks and back dealt with the lashes from her hands or whip; other things like the day I'd become an elite member of the watchdogs and make sure she was locked up…she and all her little minions.

The final straw came when I realized that she actually planned to kill me. I guess I should have realized it when I started experiencing some weird stomach aches and a severe case of diarrhea. If it wasn't for me walking past Old Man Ishizuchi's pharmacy that afternoon, and overhearing her asking him fervently if he was sure the medicine would cause severe vomiting, I might have been dead that night.

With nothing to my name, I ran away from 'home' at eight years old, and began a life of the nomad. I refused to remain in any one place for longer than six months; always journeying between towns and villages so no one could really get to know who I was. I changed my name a bunch of times and lied about my age so I could work and get some money to survive. As for education, I had no formal one. I received excellent lessons from life itself, but did manage to master reading and writing eventually, thanks to a kind family I settled with during my early teens. I doubt I would have done well in a proper school anyway. I get too antsy to remain in any one place for too long, remember?

When I turned sixteen, I returned to Nagasaki; hoping I could find the medicine man and to thank him for not letting me die….and then maybe giving him a report on how 'wonderful' his dear sister had treated me. However, I was met with bad news on arrival to the familiar small town house. My surrogate father had passed away a few years ago, and because he had made little to no money from his traveling business, he died with a massive debt over his head. His home had been put up for auction, now run by a group of yakuza that was considered the most powerful in all of Japan.

It would be my initiation into that dark, seedy underworld; a place I really had no plans of being except for that stupid side of me that felt I owed it to the old man. I had to pay off his debt somehow, and if it meant working for the yakuza…then so be it.

Enter Masakata Kojima…the man I would eventually kill.

Kojima was my friend and mentor or at least I thought he was. He was a junior member of the Bakufu syndicate, and was one day hoping to be 'made'. In the interim, he was one of their go-to guys for smaller jobs like threatening the locals who owned the syndicate money, or dealing with pesky individuals who just didn't know when to shut up or who thought about skipping town. Though I wasn't allowed to follow him when at 'work', he would always regale me of his escapades over a beer and good food at his favorite restaurant.

I thought he was the coolest cat around. He was always dressed like he was going to a party. With his slicked black hair – a throwback to the days of rock and roll – his white linen suits, colorful Hawaiian shirts, which would be opened to reveal a hairy chest adorned with an expensive gold chain and dark sunglasses, he was the consummate showman. A cigarette would always dangle from the corner of his lips, and when he spoke, his words came out in a low drawl as if he had all the time in the world. There were times when I found myself trying to emulate his speech pattern, only to stop in embarrassment because I knew I sucked at it. Each finger on his large hands had at least a gold or silver ring; one of which was the most important because it signified he was a member of the Bakufu.

"One day, man," he'd drawl and blow a ring of smoke in my face. "One day…you're gonna get your own ring, Naruto. You and me…brothers for life."

I wanted to tell him that I had no interest in being a yakuza; that the only reason I was even hanging around them was because I had to keep giving Kojima or his partner – Ichimura (a big, ugly bastard) their payment every two weeks. If I didn't, I'd be in trouble. However, having Kojima on my side had been a blessing. He claimed he had negotiated on my behalf in regards to the bi-weekly thing. If not, I would have been working my ass off to get the payment every fucking week, something I could barely afford.

I, unofficially, became his 'younger brother', and found myself being introduced to places and things I never thought possible. For instance, the first time I was taken to the red light district. I could still remember the conversation and how red-faced I had been through it all. That stupid Ichimura just had to be there to witness my humiliation, hadn't he?

It all started with Kojima complaining about the broad he had slept with the night before.

"Think she give me the crabs, man," he grumbled while adjusting himself. "I've been itching like crazy."

"Might wanna go see the doc," Ichimura suggested as he shoveled some more of the spicy noodles into his mouth. "Heard its spreading these days."

Kojima grumbled and stuck a cigarette in his mouth. He leaned forward, giving me the honor of lighting it up for him. After taking a long and much-needed drag, he adjusted himself again and then made a face. "I need to let it cool off…might be heading off to the RDL soon."

Ichimura – all folds of flesh and spittle – guffawed and shook his bald head. "Oh yeah? What about the kid? He gonna follow us?"

Kojima eyed me for a long minute, while I tried my best to keep my cool. I had never really been with a woman before. The closest had been in my fourteenth year when a couple of friends of mine had dared me to sleep with a local older woman who had seemed to take a liking to me. She had gotten as far as taking off my pants and was just about to go down on me when her husband suddenly showed up! Needless to say, I never lived down the embarrassing incident. Here I was, an innocent fourteen year old kid, running down the street with his pants around his ankles and some old geezer shooting at me. I could have died that night!

"You ever been there before, Naruto?"

"Huh?"

"The RDL?" Kojima asked with a light smirk. I thought about lying, but I knew he'd figure it out before I was even done shaking my head.

"Well…I uh…passed it…one time…" Which wasn't a lie actually. I had more than passed it a few times, and every time I had told myself that it would be the night I'd finally have the balls to walk into one of the buildings and demand a woman to satisfy me…I'd chicken out at the last minute.

"You passed it one time," Kojima replied before bursting into loud laughter that seemed to ricochet around the restaurant. I wanted to die.

"You never fucked a girl before?"

Someone kill me now, please.

"Never sucked a girl's tits? Eh?"

"Besides his momma's!" Ichimura added insult to injury by cupping his man boobs and pretending to be a girl by pouting his lips and trying to come on to me. "Come suck my titties, pretty Naruto. I'm here for you."

Kojima snickered. "Not even tasted a woman's cunt?"

Ichimura – again – stuck out his tongue in a decisively rude gesture that made me burn with shame and disgust. I wanted to shove the plate of food in his face until he choked on it.

"That's it then," Kojima decided with a slam of his fist on the table. "We're gonna give you a good ol' initiation party to become a man tonight, Naruto."

And that was that. No amount of arguing or pleading with Kojima would make a difference. In less than an hour, I found myself being ushered into a room in one of the most expensive brothels (as you might have guessed we only got in because of his Bakufu status), with a beautiful dark-haired beauty who must have been at least ten years older than me.

"Is this your first time?" she had crooned when she noticed that I was still kneeling with my gaze lowered to the tatami mat. I felt as frozen as a block of ice and was sure I would screw up with even the simple task of taking off my shirt. I felt so awkward and shy, I wanted to run out of the room and never look back.

"It's okay, baby," she breathed into my ear; and boy did my crown jewels get as hard as a rock at her voice and touch. "I'll teach you everything you need to know to please a woman."

And with the silent whisper of her kimono dropping to the floor, I had my first introduction to the female body, and allowed myself to be taken to a whole new world where indescribable pleasures and desires were revealed.

Morning came too damn soon.

"So…how does it feel to be a man?" Kojima had asked me later that afternoon with a knowing smirk on his visage.

How did it feel? Like I could do absolutely no wrong. Just remembering how many times I made that woman call out my name made me rub my nose smugly. She had been a good teacher, but the student had eventually surpassed even her greatest of expectations. I could still taste her warm juices on my tongue and lips.

"Ask for me when you come back," she had invited; looking absolutely delectable with the sheet pooled around her waist and her full breasts bearing my imprints of passion. Her card was still burning a hole in my pocket, and I definitely knew I'd be making many repeat visits.

I kept my word…for a few months at least. Each session with 'Kiyo' was more intense than the last. It did suck that I had to wait for her on some nights since she was apparently in demand, and I guess the novelty began to wear off when I realized that I was never really going to be the only man for her. I would have to keep sharing her with others, and that knowledge began to turn me off.

It was also during this time that I met Sakura, and no, she was not working at the red light district.

One of my many odd jobs was working at a small bookstore which was right beneath a cram school. I worked the evening shifts, and that was when most of the students would begin stomping up the steps beside the shop to make their way to the school. Sakura was one of those students, and I had the pleasure of meeting her up close and personal when she first stopped to purchase a few notebooks and writing materials.

The funny thing was there were many girls who came walking through those doors; most of the bookwormish kind and some I felt were way out of my league and wouldn't even give me a second look. Sakura fell in the latter category, and from the moment she walked in, I experienced dual sensations of intense euphoria and misery. Euphoria at how cute she looked in her black and white school uniform with that pink hair held up with white ribbons. She had given me a polite smile and bow when she walked into the store with a friend, and I had assumed that was that. All the same, I pretended to arrange books as I 'stalked' her down the aisles. She seemed to be looking for something, and in the process of praying that she would call on me for help, yet hoping she wouldn't because I might say something stupid – she did call on me in the end.

I couldn't recall our first conversation because I must have been on cloud nine through it all. I do remember her smiling at me again as I rang up her purchases and wished her a good night. As she left, I honestly assumed that would be the last of it; that I'd never see her again and she would have forgotten me completely.

However, when she returned the very next day to buy just a pencil…after browsing through the shelves for almost half-an-hour, I figured I just might have a chance. I tried engaging her in conversation, and before you knew it, she was laughing at my stupid jokes and suggesting we meet at the park on a Saturday.

I couldn't believe it! The very notion that this gorgeous girl would want to be seen with a bum like me…it was too damn good to be true!

"What you've got there, little brother," Kojima had said with a smirk, after I gushed about it to him. "Is a girlfriend."

"A girl…girlfriend?" I stammered with a blush so hot I felt I would go up in flames.

Kojima laughed and patted my shoulder. "You've got to treat her right, all right? Show her a good time. Make her feel special and all that."

Burning with determination to be the best boyfriend in the world, I all but pounced on my mentor. "Teach me everything! I want to know what to do…I don't want her to leave me, ever!"

For the next few months, I played the role of perfect boyfriend for Sakura. On the nights I wasn't working, I'd diligently wait for her outside the cram school and take her home on my motorbike. I saved up some of the money that I wasn't giving to the syndicate to buy her the nicest things, which she'd gush over in delight. Our first kiss was shared in a movie theatre where she made me watch some sappy movie I didn't even really like. I got to first base in her living room when her parents weren't home, and we finally got to go all the way in my cheap apartment, which I had done my best to clean because I knew she was coming over. Not only had she prepared a great hot pot, which we finished in one sitting, her shy invitation for me to finally take what I had silently begged for since we began dating – was well worth the wait.

I finally introduced her to Kojima six months into our relationship, and looking back now, I guess I should have figured something would go wrong with that fated meeting. Perhaps I should have been more careful with the way she seemed curious about Kojima. I had only assumed it was because of his looks – he was handsome after all – or the fact that he was a yakuza and that in itself was intriguing. I really thought nothing of it.

How stupid and naïve I was.

"You've got one fine chick there, brother," Kojima had told me one morning while having a smoke and beer on the docks. We could see some watchdogs rounding up a couple of rowdy teens in the distance.

"Yeah," I replied with a shy smile. "I think I'm gonna ask her to marry me."

Kojima spit out the beer he just drank, stared at me incredulously before bursting into loud laughter. "Marriage? Already? You ain't even seventeen yet, and you're already marrying the chick."

"I love her," I muttered with righteous indignation. Who was he to laugh at me? He slept around with different women every night and had the crabs to show for it. I had a beautiful girl I could talk to whenever I wanted. "And she loves me too," I added just in case he doubted it.

Kojima rolled his eyes and snorted. "Yeah, sure she does."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing," he replied with a playful wink. "Just be wary of bitches, Naruto. They ain't always as they seem."

"Sakura's not a bi…bitch," I hissed; hating he would even attach that label to the girl I loved. It was damn disrespectful. "She's a wholesome beautiful girl."

"Yeah, yeah, invite me to the wedding then," came the drawl of dismissal.

I guess my hate for Kojima began from then, and it only festered when he made no attempt to apologize for his attitude towards Sakura as time went on. My hatred came to a head on the night I was to make my monetary delivery to them. It was a terrible night; one in which the heavens seemed really pissed what with how hard it was raining. Visibility sure was poor, and I had almost crashed a couple of times. Guess I should have figured that was a bad omen.

Usually we had our meetings in the restaurant, where the money would be given and either he or Ichimura would count it out to make sure it was all there. However, neither of them were in the restaurant that night, which had me bewildered. Querying the cook yielded nothing. He hadn't seen the duo either.

My next option was to go directly to their homes, and since I had no clue where Ichimura lived, I figured Kojima wouldn't mind me popping into his lavish apartment; a place I had visited a few times in the past. If there was any reason for one to become a yakuza, their living accommodations would have been a good enough excuse. They seemed to own the most modern buildings and with that all the extra amenities denied the lesser mortals.

Just stepping into the elevator gave me wild fantasies of becoming a yakuza boss someday and building a mansion where Sakura and I would live with our four kids…okay maybe five kids and no more. My foolish fantasy was so imprinted in my mind, I was sure I had a goofy smile on my face as I stepped up to Kojima's door and knocked on it. I could hear the loud music blasting from within, and I knew he wouldn't hear my knock or the bell ringing no matter how many times I pressed it.

I really wasn't expecting the door to be open, after all yakuza had to be careful of enemies showing up at their doorstep at anytime. So it came as a big surprise when the door knob turned quite easily at first try.

"Kojima?" I called out as I removed my shoes and sunk my sock-clad feet into the plush red carpet. I hoped he didn't mind me dripping all over the place. My umbrella had barely protected me from the harsh weather. "Kojima?"

A popular rock band blasted from the speakers and made it virtually impossible to hear oneself think, and as I made the turn from the foyer into the living room, I was met with a sight that should have not been all that surprising.

Lines of cocaine were intermingled with cigarette butts and what I was sure was rolled marijuana; the air was sickly sweet with the smell. Several hand guns; some of which were still brand new, lay either on the floor or on the white leather couch on which women's lingerie was draped as if taken off quickly.

"Ko…jima?" I called out warily. Where the fuck was he? Should I even be here? Maybe I should just drop off the money and get the hell out of here while I can -

"Stoooop!" came the playful laughter that was quickly followed by the very naked figure of a girl I had once thought wholesome, innocent…_mine._

_Sakura? _

Im…Impossible.

It had to be someone that looked like her, that's all.

And yet, she had just dashed into the living room, clutching nothing but a bed sheet to her chest and laughing at the man who was just as naked, but tattooed all over, as he sauntered into the room with a pair of handcuffs dangling off a finger.

"Come on, babe. Come to Dadd…" he began, only for the words to die out as he noticed me standing like a zombie in the middle of his living room.

Sakura was a little slow on the uptake, for she had turned to reach for the marijuana on the coffee table when she finally realized her lover was no longer chasing after her.

"What made you…oh!"

Her breathless gasp of shock would have made me laugh if it wasn't for the dull throb of rage that was beginning to paint my world a muted shade of red.

"Naru…Naruto…" she began with an expression that was a cross between fear and irritation. "It's not what you think."

_Not what I think? Not what I think? You fucking bitch! You are naked and smoking weed in his apartment and you're telling me it's not what I think?_

"He made me do it," she blurted breathlessly, now walking towards me with a weak smile on her visage. "I swear, Naruto. He said if I didn't sleep with him, he'd …he'd…he'd kill you for not paying off the money you owe."

My eyes widened at this news and my fevered gaze darted to Kojima, who was now smiling a little. He shrugged and tossed the cuffs aside. "The bitch is right…not all the way right though. I did tell her she had to sleep with me, but she didn't put up much of a fight. Thought she'd be all pissed off at the idea, but all it took was one phone call and she was letting me bang her all night long."

"Stop lying!" Sakura shrieked, while trying to press herself against me, but the smell of her…the stench that reeled off her was that of sex. The sickening perfume of another man's seed all over a body I had once worshipped. For the first time – no second time – in my life, I really wanted to hit a woman badly.

"What is she talking about?" I asked instead; in a voice that sounded very unlike me. It was deeper…colder…detached from the happy-go-lucky Naruto they both knew. They must have realized it as well because Sakura took a step back and even Kojima now seemed to tense a little. That's right. They've never seen me pissed off before, have they? Well welcome to the monster you've both created.

"What do you think I'm talking about?" Kojima asked with a shrug. He walked to the coffee table and picked a pack of cigarettes. Lighting up one, he took a drag and then reached for one of the newer gun models. He eyed it and seemed to test its weight on his palm. "Thanks to you, the boss ain't too happy with me these days, Naruto."

My jaw worked silently. "I've been paying you diligently. I haven't missed a payment. Not once."

"That ain't the point, fox boy." _Fox boy_ was a nick name he had given me because of my scars, and I didn't really like being called that. I thought it degrading, but couldn't really tell him that, could I? He grinned and revealed his perfect white teeth, marred only by the lone gold tooth as a left incisor. "See? I put in a good word for you, but they are becoming impatient. They want more…and often. Meaning, you gotta double the amount you give …and it's gotta be every week now."

I was furious. "You never told me that! How the fuck am I gonna get that much money to pay every week? You know how many hours I put in at work, you asshole!"

"Better watch how you talk to me, kid," he drawled and pointed the gun at Sakura who gave yelp of horror and clung to me. "It's either that…or the girl goes…or you go…either one don't matter much to me."

My heart sunk low in disbelief and with a deep sadness I could not put into words. Was this the same Kojima who had laughed and shared some of his private moments with me? Was this the man I had really considered a big brother? Why was he suddenly treating me this way? What had I done to deserve this? Hadn't I done all I was required to do?

"You fucking bastard," I growled. "You son-of-a-bitch!" I roared again; making a lurch for him just as a particularly loud clap of thunder seemed to rock the very foundation of the building. However, I should have known that I was dealing with a yakuza in the first place. Did I honestly think I was going to inflict any damage on him?

Even before I had reached halfway across the room, he had reached for a baseball I hadn't even noticed and swung it hard across my stomach; sending me crashing into a side table where my world exploded in pain. Vomiting and spitting out blood, I tried to stagger to my feet; panic setting in as I heard Sakura's shriek of terror. The world was swimming before my eyes, but I could still make out that my girlfriend was now on her knees; tufts of her hair clutched tightly in Kojima's hand as he pointed the gun to her temple.

"Don…don't," I wheezed and tried to stagger towards him, but I lost my footing and stumbled; falling on my face like the weakling I was.

"Don't kill me!" Sakura was begging in loud gasps and harsh sobs. Her tears and snot ran down her face and she looked anything but beautiful now. "Please don't kill me! I'll do anything! I'll do anything for you! Please don't kill me! I'm begging you! Don't kill meeeee!"

"Oh for God's sake, you bitch! Just shut the fuck up!" Kojima bellowed.

The deafening sound of the gun going off made me think at first that he had fired a warning shot to keep Sakura silent, but when I felt the hot drops of blood splatter on me and the subsequent slump of her body to the floor, I could only stare in mute horror at the one good eye left – an eye that would haunt me for many nights to come. That eye seemed to blame me for all this. If only I hadn't gotten involved with Kojima. If only I hadn't tried to be the good boy and to pay the old man's debts. If only. If only. If only.

_If only we hadn't met. _

"Damn bitch messed up my couch," Kojima was mumbling as he eyed the mess he had created. He didn't seem to give a shit. Why would he? He killed people everyday on a daily basis, so why the fuck would he care that he had just destroyed the one person who meant the world to me?

"Goddamn…" he was muttering; now bending to pick up several fallen pieces of his weed. It gave me an unpleasant view of his ass, penis and balls, and the sudden urge to blow them all to hell overwhelmed me.

_Make him suffer. Make him feel pain. I'll fucking kill him._

I could see another gun about a foot away. Thanks to my fall, I had knocked it closer from its original position. I knew I had to move carefully. He was too preoccupied with his clean up and assumed I was still passed out or stunned from what had just happened to even think of doing anything.

I slid an inch closer to my target…an inch more…and yet another. It felt like it took an eternity to reach it, but as my trembling fingers finally found the cool weapon, I gripped it like a lifeline and hoped to God it was loaded.

It felt so damn heavy.

Another clap of thunder; a glance at the eye socket that glared at me with hate even in death, and the pool of her blood slowly making its way toward me.

_Get up, Naruto! Get up, Naruto! Get up, Naruto. ..Naruto!_

I was in excruciating pain, but I managed it somehow. I rose to my feet unsteadily and cocked the weapon.

He heard it, of course, and turned around slowly with a raised brow.

"Ooooh? You gonna shoot me now?" he drawled and then chuckled. "Surprise. Surprise, but then again…you and I both know you ain't got the balls to do it, Naruto."

"Sh…shut up," I hissed, hating how petrified I sounded. I held the gun in both hands, and I was still shaking like a fucking leaf.

"Sh…sh…shut up," he mimicked my stutter and laughed out loud. "You still remember how to use that damn thing? Heeeey, now I remember. I was the one who taught you how to shoot, didn't I?"

Yes, he had. For fun, he had taken me to an abandoned warehouse where he set up empty cans and showed me how to try shooting them off from a distance. I hadn't been good at it, and to be honest, it had put me off the weapon in the first place. I had never liked guns and still don't.

But for now…I would make the gun my friend.

"Go on, Naruto," he dared. "Go on and shoot me. Come on." He pounded his chest on which an impressive tattoo of a dragon seemed to be drawn all over it all the way to his back. He was a muscular and well-built bastard that's for sure. Not the kind of guy you'd want to mess with on any given day.

"Do it, you chickenshit!" he screamed when I remained frozen. I was sobbing now; ashamed of how weak I was turning out to be. I hated him and yet I realized that a part of me would still be grateful for his friendship. A part of me still saw him as my brother; still saw him as the guy who had stood up for me a few times. I couldn't kill my brother. I just _couldn't!_

He spat in disgust. "I just killed your girlfriend, and you can't even kill me. God, you are such a goddamn wuss, you make me wanna puke!"

He growled and reached for his gun and that was when I _knew_ I was going to die. It was now or never. He was faster than me, and he'd always be faster than me. There was simply no more time to think over anything.

_I'm so sorry…so sorry…so sorry…so sorry…so…_

**BAM!**

Already deafened by the first shot, I barely heard the second, but did feel the effects of firing the weapon all the same. I felt as if my arms would fall off, and I almost lost my footing too. I watched in mute fascination and horror as his eyes widened a little as if unable to believe I had finally done it.

He looked down at his chest, and I swear I hadn't exactly planned to hit that area – I was just pointing randomly, but apparently I made a direct hit to his heart. The perfect shot. I could make a damn good sniper if anyone was in the mood to do some recruiting.

"You…" A gurgle of blood erupted from his mouth, but the bastard seemed to be smiling for some bizarre reason. "Knew…you… had it in you…you bas…"

He fell onto his face before he could finish his words, but I had heard enough anyway. Slowly, feeling all the power seep away from my legs, I sunk to my knees and allowed the gun to slip from my fingers and to the blood-soaked carpet.

I was officially dead; in mind and spirit.

I would be caught. My fingerprints and footprints were all over the damn place.

I don't remember how long I remained frozen in that position, but eventually I realized that I had to get my butt moving if I at least hoped to escape before his yakuza friends found me. I had done the unthinkable after all. Killing a member of their own was a guarantee you were not going to live to see the next day.

In motions that felt automated, I covered up Sakura's body with the sheet, said a quick prayer for her and hoped she'd forgive me in the afterlife.

I was bloodied and still limping as I left the building, but was lucky not to encounter anyone who was going to ask any questions.

That night, I packed up my few belongings and left Nagasaki.

For the next two years, I became the hunted; by both the yakuza and the watchdogs who were no doubt going to be on their side – at least the corrupt ones. I knew it would only be a matter of time before all the leads would come back to me. All the same, I tried to live the life of a good man; to lay low and keep my nose out of trouble. I bought wigs and changed my name many times over. To hide my 'whiskers', I'd have to apply thick layers of foundation; a pain in the ass to do every morning, but necessary all the same. I must have lived in over ten cities, towns, or villages within that two-year span, while counting down the days, minutes, and seconds until I'd be finally brought to justice.

My arrest was almost anti-climatic, and all because of a silly mistake.

It might have been two years, but if there was one thing about the watchdogs, they never gave up on criminals on their Most Wanted list. The past week had been particularly trying because my face had appeared on the news a whole lot more than usual. I couldn't go out as much as I wanted, and I was beginning to run out of food. I had to get something to eat lest I starve to death in my apartment. It had only been a five minute walk across the street to pick up a loaf of bread, in the wee hours of the morning, and in my haste/desperation I had forgone wearing my wig and contact lenses.

The storekeeper - a nice old lady who was pleasant to talk to on any other given day – had just about screamed when I stepped through the door. Her husband – who was also a pretty nice guy – had run in from the back room to see what the commotion was about. He hardly gave me a chance to explain myself before whipping out his shotgun and telling me to stay put as he ordered his wife to call the police. I made no attempt to run, and though I tried to reassure them that I wasn't going to do anything to harm them, they refused to believe me. There was a hefty bounty on my head after all, and if there was anything good that came out of me being catered off to the local jail, it was that the old man and his wife would have some money to keep their business going for a couple more years.

Naturally my arrest had the Bakufu syndicate and watchdogs arguing over who had the rights to my death. The yakuza, of course, wanted payback for taking the life of their own, but I guess the Chief of Police finally got them to agree to me being sent to Byaku-Shinkyou, where they were sure that my punishment would be a whole lot worse than death.

I'm sure monetary negotiations were involved, but whatever the case, I was no longer on the yakuza death list. The watchdogs – or Byaku-Shinkyou - would deal with me however it deemed fit.

My fate was simply no longer in my hands.

_I deserve whatever comes to me._

* * *

><p>"Hey, you! Wake up!"<p>

I lifted my head slowly – where it had been resting against my raised knees - and blinked blearily at the sudden flood of light to nearly blind me. Lifting an arm to shield my eyes, it was hard to make out who it was at first until the guard finally lowered the lantern. He stepped aside to reveal a watchdog I did not recognize. He was pretty tall with a beard that gave him wolf-like qualities except its tip looked more like a goatee than actually shaggy and wild. His eyes – beneath the glow of the lantern – looked like liquid pools of brown chocolate, and he might have been kind…though he wasn't exactly smiling at the moment.

I swallowed tightly. Damn. Was it time already?

"Are you Uzumaki Naruto?" the watchdog asked in a voice that seemed to ricochet off the cave walls.

"Yes…?"

He gave a light grunt and removed a sheet of paper and a pen tucked within his kamishimo. I watched as he scribbled something on it.

"All right," he mumbled before turning to the guard. "Get him as cleaned up as possible and bring him out to the courtyard to join the others within the hour. The first captain will be doing the inspection."

"Yes, sir."

With a final, brief, and almost dismissive look in my direction, the watchdog left the dungeon, only for two more guards to appear out of nowhere.

"On your feet, scum," one of them barked and proceeded to strike me with his bokken across my shoulders.

I swallowed my cry of pain and stumbled to my feet; having just enough time to hide my precious medicinal cream below my burlap blanket. I dared not remind them of my aching feet, but luckily one of the guards remembered and ordered for them to lead me out carefully.

"Don't want his tainted blood staining our sacred ground," came the stupid rationale, but I could care less about the insults now. I was finally free…well for a couple of hours at least.

I had no idea what awaited me with this so-called 'inspection', but I hoped to God that whoever this first captain was, he'd be kind enough to give me a break or at least move me to a better cell.

I might have been a goddamn sinner, but even God Himself had mercy on us every now and then. So why couldn't mere mortals do the same?


	4. 04: Confrontation

**Notes: **My sincere thanks again for the comments/feedback from you lovely people (and my new BFFFFFFFFF! You know you! *lol*) Anyhoo, I really do appreciate the encouragement, and I hope more of you leave comments because I like reading them! :D

Enjoy! (a little bit of naughtiness at the end...wait...why am I even warning you guys? Read on! Heh)

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 04: <strong>

**Confrontation**

_Why should I be bitter  
>About someone who was<br>A complete stranger  
>Until a certain moment<br>In a day that has passed._

_- Saigyo_

The day has _not_ been a good one so far.

I woke up feeling irritable and restless; no thanks to Orochimaru dismissing me last night when I tried to bring up the topic of my participation in the upcoming Gudan festivities. How he always managed to make me look like a child in front of his 'precious' Kimimaro (or other officers in the vicinity for that matter), got me steaming with humiliation and rage. Just before I got into the meat of my reasoning, he had yawned and waved his hand as if shooing away a fly.

"Not tonight, Sasuke," he said with a shake of his head. "I am weary, and I suggest we discuss this some other day. Gudan is still technically months away. Why the rush? The sinners will be punished in due time. Until then, find other ways to work off your frustrations, my dear." And as if his insult wasn't bad enough, he then winked at me playfully. "You know my door is always open in case you change your mind."

_That sick, twisted, perverted bastard!_

It was all I could do not to plunge my katana into his back as he turned and walked away with a gloating Kimimaro by his side. If looks could kill, he (both of them) would have been singed to death.

It was with thoughts of multiple variations of murdering my tormentor, that I finally fell into dreamless sleep…well at least it had been dreamless for the first few hours until the _nightmare_ began. Imagine my shock and horror when my very dreams were suddenly filled with _that_ face; that scarred face with eyes of deepest blue that seemed to scorch my very soul. I told myself it was only because he had stood out from the others; that it was because of his look of determination and anger that I was yet to witness in any other sinner at this stage of their incarceration. From the moment I saw him, something told me he was going to be trouble, and if my dreams were any indication, they only made me more apprehensive. I needed to get rid of him and quickly, but with Gudan still months away (it had to be done during the summer), I was stuck with trying to find other ways to make him non-existent.

All the same…I couldn't remember exactly what the dream had been about, but I do know he was there…doing something…but…_what_?

"…suke-sama?"

Had we been talking? I think I remember we were talking for a while on a…

"Sasuke-sama?"

…or maybe we were traveling to someplace. I couldn't remember the exact locat-

"SASUKE-SAMA?"

"What is it?" I snapped in irritation; finally looking up from the scroll I was pretending to read all this time.

Haku's visible wince at the tone of my voice had me relaxing my furrowed brows a little. Unfortunately, he has had to deal with most of my bad mood all morning (something I'm guessing he's sort of used to by now). Still, I had to try to relax since it wasn't his fault.

"Yes, Haku?" I asked in what I hoped was a softer and more conversational tone.

"Momichi Zabuza-san is here," he announced with a light bow.

Oh great. I completely forgot all about that asshole. Sighing inwardly, I unrolled another section of the scroll. "Let him wait in the main office. I'll see him there."

"Yes, my Lord."

Wait a damn minute. Was it just me or did Haku sound a little breathless? I looked up with a raised brow and called him back into the room.

"Yes, my Lord?" he asked as he kneeled again and tried to look innocent…which wasn't all that hard to do. His facial features already had that expression of purity; of one who was untainted, though I knew he was almost my age and had seen more than his share of evils in the world. It was one of the reasons I chose him; perhaps more to rescue him from Orochimaru's clutches or to protect him for some inexplicable reason. Oh, and that he had another skill that made him an invaluable manservant.

Right now there were twin hues of color on his cheeks. I knew the winter months were fast approaching, so it couldn't possibly have anything to do with the current weather. It was windy at best outside and not hot enough to warrant the blush.

"Are you all right?" I asked; absently reaching for the quill and ink, so I could sign my name at the end of the scroll.

"Yes, my Lord," came the predictable response, but I could tell something else was on his mind, and I had the feeling it was related to the officer I was about to meet. I tried to piece together Haku's history and to see if there was any reason for the two men to have met before. However, all I really knew about my manservant was that he had been found wandering the streets of the town about six years ago and brought into Byaku-Shinkyou by Kimimaro. At first Orochimaru had balked at the notion of the newcomer being a female, until it was proven otherwise (in the most obvious way of course). It was also a reminder that despite being with Haku for this long…I knew little to nothing about him. I had not bothered asking about his personal life because I did not care to know about it. All this time, I had actually seen him as nothing more than a…well…tool…

_(and how does that make you any different from Orochimaru?)_

…damn.

"Sa…Sasuke-sama?" came the quizzical question.

I tried to give him a smile, but that action felt foreign and strange to me. I just couldn't manage it. I had been brought up to keep my distance from those who were under my employ; menservants included. This was no time to become 'buddies' with him.

"I was just curious about your…reaction to Zabuza being here," I finally said aloud. I stamped the scroll, rolled it up and placed it into the growing pile of scrolls beside me. They all contained orders for different officers that would have to be enforced; list of officers, patrol routes, patrol times, bodyguard duties etc. etc.

Haku bowed his head and to my chagrin, his blush deepened. Even before he opened his mouth, I already had an idea of where he was going to go with this.

"I knew…Zabuza-san and I…we were once…lo…"

"Save it," I cut in with a shake of my head; trying hard to hide my disgust as the mental image of Haku bedding that big ugly oaf, filled my mind. I rose to my feet, and he must have realized I was in an even sourer mood because he couldn't bear to look at me now.

Like a forlorn puppy, he trailed after me as I left my private quarters and began the brisk walk across the courtyard toward the administrative section of the compound. Since Orochimaru had decided to build/re-create his domain where his official affairs could be conducted, I chose to take over my father's former office. During the surprise raid, the heathens had blasted holes through the doors and windows with their machine guns; hoping to get my father that way. Instead, they ended up taking several lives of close friends, good officers, and left most of the once prestigious building in disarray. Bullet holes had once riddled the fine oak walls, bamboo screens, and brick exterior. Windows had been shattered with either their splinters or large pieces of glass buried within the bodies of the unfortunate few within the building at the time. Orochimaru had overseen the renovations, however, I pleaded with him to maintain the original style and design with the help of many old photographs. If there was one other thing I could be grateful for, it was his decision to let me have my way with that particular request.

"Good morning, Sasuke-sama," came the polite greetings from some of the officers stationed on the grounds as I walked past them. I gave curt nods in greeting, but barely moved my head in acknowledgement at some of the purified sinners who greeted me, while attending to their various chores. They did have to earn their keep after all, and though I would have personally released them (who needed the overcrowding), Orochimaru seemed to think otherwise. Hence for those sinners who had gone through the purification rites and renounced their sinful ways, they were given a chance to redeem themselves by becoming productive members of society. Gardeners, landscapers, courtyard sweepers, cleaners, those responsible for making sure the temple, dojos, and officers were spic and span every single day, dish washers, laundry cleaners, mechanics…hell, you name it, you were bound to see one of 'them' hovering around like incessant flies.

I will admit most of them did spectacular jobs. Byaku-Shinkyou always looked impeccable.

However, my admiration for a well-tended lawn faded rapidly when I noticed Zabuza standing at the foot of the stone steps which led to my office. He was engaged in conversation with another officer; both laughing at some joke which got my hackles raised. I was sure he must have been aware of why he was called to see me, and yet he was acting as if this was some kind of a tête-à-tête with his friends. If it wasn't for the officer he was chatting with suddenly looking over his shoulder and snapping to attention as he noticed me, Zabuza might have very well gone on talking even if I stepped on him.

"Good morning, Lord Sasuke!" the other officer bellowed in greeting.

I grunted in response and nodded toward Zabuza, who had only saluted without saying a word to me. His eyes seemed to gleam with amusement; as if mocking me, and though I had only planned to give him a reprimand about his behavior, I realized – as I began to lead the way up the steps – that I was going to make him pay for his goddamn insolence.

One of the guards slid open the _shoji_ screen doors leading into the main office, and I walked into a room where I felt a sense of calm and purpose fall over me. Besides my private onsen, this was also a place in which I could put my thoughts together; perhaps because I felt my father's spirit all around me.

Fugaku Uchiha had been a strict traditionalist, and instead of the many desks and chairs one could find in other sections of the building, stepping into his (my) office was like stepping into time.

The finest tatami mats combined with white cedar made up the floor. The ceiling was of red cedar paneling and the walls covered with traditional mud plaster. Though the original had been destroyed during the raid, we had managed to find a replica of an eight foot Mizuya cabinet in which my father had kept most of his files, scrolls, and other items of significance. I would later learn that most of those items were stolen by the heathens, which wasn't that surprising to me. There was going to be little to no hope of recovering those ever again.

An old-fashioned radio (father always enjoyed listening to the classics) sat beside a telephone, I rarely used, in a corner of the room. On the right was an alcove where father used to have private meetings. I chose to convert that into a shrine to my family, where my father, mother, and brother's photographs sat amongst a small bouquet of flowers and candles that I lit every morning before praying in remembrance.

There were also photographs of my father, grandfather, and great-grandfather on the wall above the cabinet interspersed with the Uchiha clan crest (_mon_) of a fan. Our motto - _to serve and protect_ – was etched around it. On days when I had felt overwhelmed with my duties, I would find myself looking up at the great men and that damned crest as if cursing it for putting such a heavy burden on my shoulder. And yet, I knew I wouldn't have traded my position for any other…_ever_.

I allowed Haku to remove my swords and to place them on an antique console beside the cabinet, before settling down on the plush pillow behind the low desk with crossed legs. Along with the console, both pieces of furniture had, surprisingly, lasted through the barrage of gunfire. Though the Gansu desk (a gift from some Chinese dignitaries) still had a few bullet holes on the side, it was still sturdy enough to handle my day-to-day business. It was a morbid reminder of that day, but I felt it would be an injustice to discard it …besides it did have sentimental value.

Despite the pile of paperwork awaiting my attention, I still took a moment to look beyond the desk, past the opened _shoji_ screens, and into a setting father must have seen a thousand times over in his lifetime. From this vantage point, Byaku-Shinkyou was as beautiful as it had always been…as it was _meant_ to be.

Beyond the large courtyard - where my brother and I used to play a lot and where father welcomed his many visitors - was the temple, the two main dojos and the massive gates which led into the compound. Beyond that was the view of Lake Kuttara surrounded by snow-capped mountains in the horizon. In winter, it was simply stunning; for the combination of snow and ice made for a picturesque scene worthy of any tourist postcard. I could see why my ancestors would have decided to move here, of why they had created Byaku-Shinkyou as a haven for their small traveling band of the Uchiha. According to the historical scrolls written about my family, Byaku had started out with only a few wooden townhouses to shelter those families. It had eventually expanded into its current 3,000 acre state where the clan had flourished to eventually become one of the most powerful and influential in the country. It was an exclusive community and did have its share of men, women, and children at one time.

_(And what has it become now, Sasuke?)_

A shadow of its former self. Thanks to those goddamn heathens.

"You never know who to trust," had been Orochimaru's reasoning as he made the law banning women and children from the premises. Unless they were coming to pay their respects at the temple, Byaku-Shinkyou would no longer accept them. In other words, the remaining few Uchiha, who were not able-bodied men, were banished from a land they once thought as theirs.

Swallowing down the familiar taste of bitterness that filled my tongue, I cleared my throat and forced myself to get back to the present.

"You can ask him to come in now," I ordered Haku as I reached for the folder containing Zabuza's personal information. "And you can leave us. This is to be a private matter."

"Yes, my Lord."

I barely looked up as I finally heard him come in; simply motioning for him to sit with a wave of my hand as I looked through his records over the years.

_Momichi Zabuza – Age 25_ (Good grief. I thought he was much older.)

_Place of Birth – Kyushu_ (not surprising. I hear most heathens came from the South)

He was recruited into the force at the age of fifteen and spent the first five years at Byaku-Shinkyou being trained under Orochimaru. He was extremely proficient with the sword and preferred that as his weapon of choice. He was promoted to captain and transferred to Toshu-gu five years ago where he has presided over that branch 'til today. His conviction record was at an impressive 94 percent, which meant he rarely let any sinner off easily. His precinct registered the lowest crime and murder rate compared to the others, though I doubted this report was telling me the whole truth. There was no mention of brutal scare tactics or of meaningless violence. There was nothing to tell of any wrong convictions or false accusations. In fact, anyone reading this, without knowing about the incident I witnessed, would have painted him as a goddamn saint.

"Well? Do I make the cut, sir?" came the low drawl, which had me looking up sharply.

He was sitting crossed-legged like me, but his body language was anything but respectful. That annoying gleam of amusement was still in his eyes, and his lips were bared to reveal those sharp canines that made me shudder with revulsion. Irritated, I slammed the folder shut and spat out coldly.

"You know exactly why I called you here, Momichi Zabuza. Your conduct on the bus ride from Toshu-gu was extreme and unbecoming of an officer of Byaku-Shinkyou. You have -"

His sudden bark of laughter caught me off guard and sent a rush of color to my face. My hands were slowly beginning to form tight fists.

"Do you mind sharing the joke?" I asked in a tone likely to freeze steam.

Zabuza smirked and leaned forward; a hand resting on his thigh as if about to share a secret with me. "You're reprimanding me for using brute force on a sinner when the very things you do _beneath the surface_ makes my antics child's play?"

My jaw worked for a second. He was right, but I wouldn't give him the pleasure of admitting it.

"Your display of _unnecessary_ brute force _in such a public setting_," I continued; keeping my gaze firmly on him. "tarnishes the reputation of this establishment. When sinners are driven to and from their places of incarceration, they will be treated as humanely as possible until appropriate purification rights are administered."

He snorted. "Says the guy who chops off heads for a living."

The slam of my fist on the desk was done before I could control myself. Even he seemed a bit surprised (if his raised brow was any indication) at my reaction. I was not usually this quick to anger, but with my already sour mood this morning, Zabuza was really pushing his luck.

"You will know your place, Zabuza," I stated succinctly. "A reprimand will be written and added to your records as a warning. However, if this happens again -"

"What are you going to do? Torture me like the rest of your sinners? Demote me?" He sneered; his lips peeling back as his grin widened.

That was it.

"Your _mon_."

He blinked in shock for a second before scowling. "What did you say?"

I held out my right hand in case my point wasn't clear enough the first time around. "Your badge. Now, officer."

"Are you fucking kidding me? Do you know how…?"

I snapped my fingers impatiently, and from seemingly out of nowhere, two burly guards – definitely much bigger than Zabuza - appeared behind him.

"It seems Momichi Zabuza has forgotten his place as an officer of Byaku-Shinkyou," I said through clenched teeth, though I had to admit that watching that shit-eating grin now wiped off his face was delightful to my sense of victory. "Please remind him of exactly what happens to those who feel they are above the law."

"Yes, sir," they echoed like automatons, promptly reaching out to each wrap a muscled arm beneath Zabuza's arms and dragging him to his feet.

"Get off me, you sons of bitches!" Zabuza growled, and he did put up a good struggle; nearly taking out one of the guards with his legs. "You spoiled little brat!" He growled at me. "You think you can keep hiding behind Orochimaru? Huh? You're just a goddamn pawn for him! You are-"

I had heard enough of his drivel.

With an impatient sigh, I rose to my feet, walked around my desk, reached for his katana within his obi, unsheathed it and pressed its extremely sharp blade against his jugular. I watched dispassionately as a thin thread of blood suddenly appeared on his bronzed skin, and even he must have sensed that any attempt at struggling now would result in his immediate death.

"I gave you an option," I hissed quietly. "You chose to be a fucking shit head over it. Bear the consequences like a true officer of Byaku-Shinkyou, and come back crawling on your hands and knees begging for mercy when it's all over like the fucking dog you are."

I ripped out the badge from his uniform, ignoring the dual emotions of fury and dismay that filled his eyes, before pushing him a little as a signal to the guards to take him away. His katana was thrown aside as well, where another officer appeared to take away the trash.

_/You're just a goddamn pawn…!/_

_Fuckin' asshole! _As if he had the right to judge me!

However, in the sudden silence after the calamity, my head began to pound with a headache that had my vision blurring. It was with an effort that I made my way to the teapot of water Haku always placed on one of the side cabinets in the office. I was even more surprised to find that my hands were trembling…and that I was still holding onto that idiot's tainted badge. I flung it in disgust just as a light knock on the door signaled another visitor.

I was so not in the mood to see anyone. Turning away a little to hide my state of weakness, I asked sharply. "Yes?"

"Lord Orochimaru would like to see you, Sasuke-sama," came the clipped tones an officer.

Great. Had word gotten out about Zabuza's antics already? I'm beginning to think Orochimaru had a crystal ball that saw everything going on around the compound. That thought didn't surprise me in the slightest.

"I'll be there shortly," I answered; waiting until the officer was completely gone before guzzling down two cups of water. I closed my eyes and tried to control myself; to regain that feeling of calm and serenity. Hadn't he once told me that I'd die before my time because I put too much stress on myself? With the way my heart was still racing, I wondered if it was only a matter of time before Death came knocking. Perhaps I would even welcome it with open arms.

_But not before taking you with me, Orochimaru._

Ten minutes later, I was kneeling before his desk; waiting (im)patiently for him to be done with the signing of some documents, which he then handed to some officers with curt instructions that they be delivered promptly. Though my curiosity burned to know just why those documents were so damn important, it only reminded me of how much Orochimaru kept from me. He rarely disclosed any real official plans to me unless he felt it was necessary, or perhaps I really hadn't cared to know. I was also surprised to see his 'shadow' wasn't around.

"Kimimaro is on assignment for me this morning," Orochimaru said with a small smile as he began to unravel another scroll. "Miss him that much?"

_Urgh._

"…no."

He chuckled and began to read what was before him. Today, he was dressed in a pair of black pants that molded his hips, thighs and legs like a second skin, and a white shirt with sleeves that billowed like those of a pirate's. I had never seen him wear the uniform of the watchdogs, which was fine with me. I cringed to think of him parading around with the Uchiha _mon_ on his back. His long black hair was held up in a ponytail today with an elaborate gold band that shone brilliantly whenever the sun's rays struck it. He looked even paler than usual, and though it was hard to tell, I had a feeling that beneath the thick layer of eyeliner hid bags of weariness.

_He's getting older...and he hates that... _

"Having a good morning so far?" he finally asked, and I knew he was testing me. He must have heard about what happened with Zabuza.

"Fine," I replied instead; having no intention of mentioning the officer's insubordination. "I still have a few things to do…if you'll excuse me to get them completed that is."

Orochimaru smirked and looked up. "Though I must admit that seeing your beautiful face first thing in the morning is always a pleasure, I did call you here for something important." He signed the scroll with a flourish and finally straightened up to give me his full attention.

"I am expecting a few daimyo and councilmen to pay us a visit this weekend. I trust you have no plans and will join me in entertaining them?"

_No, I do not want to join you in entertaining a bunch of old farts who only show up to kiss your ass and beg for money to further their political campaigns._

"I have no plans," I stated aloud.

"Good! Good!" Orochimaru grinned and leaned back in his chair; only to tent his long fingers beneath his chin to appraise me for a long minute. "Some of them would like to have a word or two with you."

I sighed heavily. "Look, I already I told you -"

"Yes, I realize you are not willing to share your body with any of them, but that was not the point," the older man interrupted with a wag of his finger as if admonishing me…which he was anyway. "You should keep yourself abreast of the changing political climate, Sasuke. If you hope to run this place someday, don't you think it's in your best interests to be made aware of…_everything_?"

What the hell was that all about? What was that look in his eyes? And why did I feel a sudden chill go through me at that very moment? Was there something he was telling me that I wasn't picking up? Was he trying to hint at my incompetence or that if I wasn't up to par, he just might hand Byaku-Shinkyou to…God forbid…_Kimimaro_? I shuddered at the thought and the realization that he just might be right. I had gone about my duties all these years as he had told me, never really allowing myself to think 'outside-the-box'.

_/You're just a goddamn pawn!/_

"Ah, we just got another busload of sinners," Orochimaru was saying as he changed the subject. Two other officers had entered the room while I was lost in my troubled thoughts. They were currently briefing him on the situation. I had to get out of here.

"May I be excused?" I finally asked through lips that felt parched.

"Yes, you may, Sasuke. Try to have a good day, hmm?"

I ignored his mocking jibe and bowed in farewell before making my way outside to grateful and much-needed fresh air. Sometimes being around Orochimaru could be stifling and damn claustrophobic.

After my daily morning inspection of my squads, delegating them to their patrols for the day, as well as reviewing reports from previous patrols, it was almost lunch time when Officer Asuma Sarutobi came sauntering into my office.

"Busy?" he asked with a small smile.

"I told you not to smoke in my office," I growled and waved a hand to emphasize my disapproval. But as usual, he ignored me, laughed a little, and blew even more smoke in my direction before making himself comfortable across me.

Asuma was a rare one; one of the few…actually the _only_ officer I could have a conversation with for more than five minutes. He was my assistant of sorts; a rank lower than mine, but an invaluable companion whenever it came to making some decisions. He knew there were some boundaries he could not cross, but all the same, he was a man who did not seem afraid of me or my status. It was something he had made clear from the moment we met several years ago.

"_Itachi was a good friend to me."_

I think it was those seven words that drew me to him; the fact that I latched on to anyone or anything that would remind me of my family. There was an inherent kindness in him that I had told him many times would make him weak to the sinners, but his cryptic words of:

"_Human kindness has never weakened the stamina or softened the fiber of a free people. You do not have to be cruel to be tough."_

...had left me unsatisfied and still eager to decipher what they really meant.

"Still eating alone, I see," he pointed out with a nod towards the tray of food Haku must have dropped off earlier. As if on cue, my stomach suddenly growled in protest, forcing me to move toward it. However, Haku – ever efficient – heard the cue and slid open the screen door leading into his 'hiding place' (actually it was his private office where he was to wait until called upon) and with a bow of acknowledgement to Asuma, began to set up my eating area.

"I like eating alone," I muttered as Haku uncovered the dishes; while deliberately ignoring the look Asuma must have thrown my way. Still didn't stop my cheeks from burning at what he was implying.

There was no doubt that I garnered a lot of respect (and fear) from most of the officers, and those feelings were never more on display than whenever I tried to join them in the officers' dining room. It was almost always the same reaction. I would hear lively conversation and laughter as I approached, and as soon as I stepped into the place…it would cease to hushed and reserved muttering. I knew they were uncomfortable around me, and their discomfort only made me feel more disgruntled. It was with an effort that I'd finish my meal; every damn bite like sand and rocks on my tongue. I knew they watched me surreptitiously. No one tried to strike up conversation with me, but that was okay. I didn't need to engage in trivial banter anyway. When finished with the chore of eating, I'd excuse myself – and as you might have guessed, the moment I left, the lively conversation would begin again. No doubt many of them talking about me.

Were my feelings hurt? Perhaps, but as I mentioned before, my goal was not to make friends with anyone.

"Mmm…smells and looks good, Haku," Asuma praised which sent the younger man's cheeks flaring with color at the compliment. "You have really outdone yourself."

"Thank you, sir," came the shy response that had me rolling my eyes at the exchange. I picked up the chopsticks and began to dig into my steaming bowl of _katsudon _with gusto. I had no idea I was this hungry.

"And as usual, you do not offer me any," Asuma stated with a mock pout. "See how mean he is to me, Haku-chan?"

Haku giggled and poured some tea into two cups, offered one to Asuma, before sitting back on his knees quietly.

"If you're so hungry, go join the others in the dining room," I pouted like an insolent child. "You don't have to be here."

"I'm here to keep you company because I know you'll be lonely all by yourself."

My blush deepened, and I tried to glare at him, but this only seemed to amuse him more for he burst into loud laughter.

"Goddamn it, Asuma! You're going to burn down my office one of these days!" I reached out to pick up the still smoldering cigarette that had dropped from his mouth, and flicked it outside.

"Aww man, that was the last one," came the grumble as he stared at the lost cancer stick with blatant longing.

"You should quit anyway. It's bad for you."

"Yes, mother dearest."

I gave him the middle finger and ignored the chuckle this elicited. All the same, this was…dare I say…_nice_. I hated to admit that it did feel good to have someone to share a lunch with, and because he had been out of town for the past two weeks, having him finally back home was great.

As I ate, he spoke of his travels; something that Haku seemed to enjoy since he was asking the most questions. I was too busy eating and trying to remember what else I had to get done before spending an evening training at the dojo. I needed to vent my frustrations and what better way to do that but to work up a sweat hitting something or someone?

"All done?" Asuma finally asked as I laid down my chopsticks and washed down the last bites of my meal with another cup of tea Haku had poured for me.

I belched and nodded. "Yes. What have we got?"

He dug into his _kamishimo_ to bring out a scroll, on which was listed the names of sinners brought into Byaku-Shinkyou in the past few days.

"Inspection later this evening?," Asuma reminded me. "Where you get to divide the chaff from the wheat?"

I nodded and eyed some of the familiar names. The list from Toshu-gu, in particular, had me curious because I knew _he_ was there; that bastard that had haunted my dreams last night. I didn't want to know his name and yet…

"Haku, please tell Officer Touya to get me the folder containing all the information about the sinners specifically brought in from Toshu-gu."

"Yes, my Lord."

"Anyone there interest you?" Asuma asked once Haku had left the room. I shrugged and put on an air of nonchalance.

"Not really."

"Heard Zabuza was in charge of that bus ride."

"Hn."

"Heard he was reprimanded."

"…"

Asuma smirked and shook his head. "You can be a cold-hearted son-of-a-bitch when you put your mind to it, Uchiha Sasuke."

"He had it coming," I grated harshly. "You should have seen the way he treated me. No respect whatsoever. It was downright insubordination, and he knew it. He was taunting me, Asuma."

I met those brown eyes that were now filled with an expression that made me even angrier. It was pity and perhaps sadness, but either way, I disliked it. Luckily, Haku returned before I could address Asuma's need to always feel sorry for me.

"The files as you requested, Sasuke-sama," Officer Touya announced as he stepped into the office with a pile of folders within his arms. Groaning inwardly, I asked him to place them beside my desk. With Haku clearing away the tray and excusing himself, Asuma and I were finally left alone to begin pouring through the documents. Each folder had a photograph (or mug shot if you will) as well as more detailed information about each of them.

I pretended to be interested in some of the sinners, though I was more than impatient to flip through them quickly in an effort to find the blond one. However, since we had split the job of rummaging through them, there was the possibly that Asuma might have the blue-eyed sinner's file, and my fears were confirmed when I had almost gone through my entire stack and I was yet to see him. Every now and then, I'd steal a peek at the file he was reading; my frustration mounting when the blond's photograph was still not seen. However, just as I was about to read through the sinner – Hidan's – file, another quick peek had my heart rate speeding up just a little faster in excitement.

The problem now was getting Asuma to give it to me without sounding like I was that interested.

"Hmm…"

I sat up at the low sound from the older man. "What? What is it?"

"Oh nothing," he replied as his eyes continued to dart across the folder. "It's been a while since I've seen anyone with blue eyes, that's all. You don't see those everyday, eh?"

"Well, I'm glad you find his eyes captivating," I replied flatly. "May I see the folder?"

Asuma raised a brow, and though I did my best to keep my expression neutral, I was sure he was still able to see something on my face, for he gave a small, knowing smile and without another word, handed over the folder.

I cleared my throat, ignored the curious look he was giving me, and forced myself to maintain a straight expression as I opened it. The effect was immediate and unchanged…much to my dismay. The photograph confirmed what I had seen that night and in my dreams; only instead of looking angry, there was a small smile on the scarred face as if…as if almost _relieved_ to have been caught. It was baffling to be honest, but then again, I had seen some mug shots of sinners actually laughing. There was a forming bruise on his left temple; a sign that he must have been roughed up during his stay at the local prison, and still…within those blue eyes was a glow…a light of sorts that I couldn't explain. Happiness? A person at peace within himself?

_Goodness,_ came the sudden low voice within me. _He is a good person; an inherently good person. _

I gasped and squeezed my eyes shut; knowing damn well my so-called 'ability' was responsible for this momentary lapse in judgment.

"Sasuke?" came the concerned question that had me lifting my lashes quickly.

"I'm…I'm fine," I replied with a weak smile. "Just…had a little…felt a little dizzy that's all."

"Ah…"

I lowered my gaze to the document again; this time avoiding looking directly at the photograph as I began to read his information.

_Uzumaki Naruto – Age 19 _

Oh my God! _The murderer._ I knew it! _I knew it!_ My instincts were right after all. The overwhelming rush of relief, at the notion that my initial thoughts of him being fit for Gudan, had me almost sagging or falling to the floor in gratitude. Damn whatever the hell my eyes saw, it was what the gut knew, and after so many years in this 'business', it never failed.

_Date of Birth – 10__th__ October _(just celebrated a birthday, eh? Probably in jail at the time)

_Place of Birth – Shikoku_ (of course – a southern heathen)

Unfortunately, there was really nothing else on him besides the murder. No history of any arrests or even a petty crime. All the same, it was interesting to read his statements regarding the events of that night. Apparently, he had only shot the member of the Bakufu Syndicate (more on those bastards later) in self-defense. This yakuza had shot and killed his girlfriend, so he had to protect himself.

_Taking another life for a life, eh? Typical. _

I slammed the folder shut; having read enough. However, I was in a relatively better mood. From now until Gudan, Mr. Uzumaki Naruto would wish he had never been born. In fact, by the time the festivities came around, I was sure he'd be begging for death.

Except Asuma just had to ruin my fun, didn't he? I knew I shouldn't have allowed him to do the inspection with me.

It was almost dusk when I finally found the time to do the inspection, and I was just returning from the West Block where the new busload of sinners had just arrived. Slightly out of breath and running out of time, I walked into the courtyard where I could already see the long row of sinners awaiting my judgment. About thirty of them in all, all shackled to each other with chains around their legs as well as being handcuffed; their stench alone had me cringing inwardly. They really were a sorry bunch of pathetic humans.

And he was here as well…Uzumaki Naruto.

It was all I could do not to skim the heads of the men to find him, but controlled myself as I began to walk down the row; stopping only before each man as Asuma read out his name and crime. Flanking us were two other officers, just in case of a skirmish – which was highly doubtful since the courtyard was also surrounded by guards ready to open fire on any sinner bold enough to even think of starting something stupid.

"Shigure," Asuma read. "Gambling, shoplifting."

I stared hard at the trembling man before me. His gaze was lowered; hair shaggy and unkempt to match the week-old beard in need of trimming. Beads of sweat broke out on his brow and as I tipped his chin with the handle of my sword, I examined his facial features carefully. He could barely look me in the eye. A blackened soul through and through.

"Gudan," I stated coldly, and moved to the next; ignoring the breathless cry this elicited from the condemned man…as well as the barely audible sigh from Asuma. What was his problem?

My irritation and annoyance grew with each name called and their sins; made only worse when the serial rapists and murderers stood before me. The one name Hidan was the most atrocious of them all. Even as he towered over me, with that slicked back hairstyle that seemed to be popular these days (at least for the sinners), he had absolutely no remorse for his actions. Talk about a man whose soul was so pitch black, it was impossible to see any hope for his redemption. Purification rites would be a waste.

"So you think they all deserved to die?" I asked coldly. "You think sexually abusing your victims, scalping them, and delivering body parts to their families was necessary?"

Hidan spat; his saliva almost touching my foot. Disgusting heathen. "Yep. All them bitches had it coming. No one would believe in the power of my god and his infinite mercy, so why forgive them? They deserved it. _You_ should understand, Officer."

_As if I would lower myself to your twisted hedonistic nature._

Maybe it was his smile, or his self-righteousness and justification for his actions. Whatever it was, I was sick of seeing that expression on his face. Hardly giving him time to think, I struck his face – as hard as I could - with the back of my hand, watching as his head flew back and a fine spray of blood escaped his broken nose and lips. His howl of pain was music to my ears as Asuma was quick to give me a handkerchief to wipe off the stains from my uniform.

"Gudan," I condemned the heathen and moved to the next person. I made a mental note to personally behead the fool when the time came.

My show of force seemed to do the trick, for the rest of the sinners now looked even more contrite and afraid. All the same, my good mood had completely evaporated, and by the time I found myself standing before the blue-eyed sinner, my tolerance for bullshit was at an all time low.

"Gu…" I began, not even bothering to waste another second staring at him, but Asuma cleared his throat.

"Do you have a cough now?" I snarled impatiently as I turned a little to face him.

"Well, you didn't even let me call out his name before inflicting his punishment."

"I already know what he is guilty of…and why the fuck are you standing like that?" I barked; now turning back to Uzumaki Naruto. Everything about him was now goddamn infuriating.

Naruto held up his shackled hands as if begging for forgiveness, though there was something in his expression that was a mixture of disgust and amusement. Wait a minute…_disgust_? Who the hell was he to feel any such emotion?

"The soles of his feet, Sasuke," Asuma replied forcing me to look down in confusion. Sure enough, Naruto was all but standing on the balls of his feet; an awkward position all things considered because his heels were wrapped in bandages.

So what? A cruel side of me sneered. He was going to die soon anyway, so why make his life any easier?

_/He shot my girlfriend…the woman I loved more than anything else in the world…I knew he was going to kill me and I had no other choice…I had to defend myself./_

I blinked at the sudden imprint of his typed statement filling my mind, and though I didn't want to do it, I found myself actually meeting his eyes again…and yes, this time – standing barely a foot away from him, that feeling of being sucker-punched was more intense than ever before. In the dusk, they had taken on a shade of light violet, and I swear I could see flecks of gold within them.

My eyes – which always saw the 'truth' and warned my heart to make its decision – began to burn with what it _really_ knew. That behind those blue eyes was a young man who had only done what anyone else in his position would have. Unlike me, who had no power to extract justice on those who had taken the lives of those I loved, this Naruto had done the opposite. Instead of walking away, he fought back the only way he knew how.

…and I hated him for it. Hated him for exposing a side of me that might never see the light of day.

I gritted my teeth and growled out his sentence. "Gudan."

Asuma's sigh was a little bit louder this time, and Naruto's obvious display of disdain for me was more evident in his expression. I wanted to hit him, and just when I felt the itch to do so overwhelm me, he finally looked away with his jaw set as if ready for whatever was going to come his way.

The tight grip on my _wakizashi_ – I hadn't even known I was gripping the damn thing that tightly all this time – loosened a little. In fact, as I moved on to the next sinner, I realized I was breathing a lot easier now. I had been so tense around Naruto even my shoulders were beginning to ache with a dull throb. Haku would have to give me the mother of all massages tonight. God knows I needed it badly.

"So let's see…out of thirty sinners…you only spared five," Asuma stated with as much sarcasm as he could muster. We were back in my office, where I was just about ready to call it a day. My head was beginning to hurt. "Congrats, Sasuke."

"Thank you," I replied just as sarcastically.

"Good God, man," he finally barked with a throw of his arms. "What is this? An attempt to break the record for most beheadings in one festival?"

I groaned and rubbed my aching temples as he began to nag and nag and nag and nag and…

"What the hell do you want me to do?" I finally snapped to interrupt his tirade.

"Have a _heart_ maybe? If it's not too much to ask."

I snorted and rose to my feet. I was going to end this conversation. There was really no reason for me to remain here listening to –

"Itachi would have been very disappointed in you," came the quiet words that hit me hard in the solar plexus and brought an unexpected sting of unshed tears in my eyes.

That wasn't fair. That was not fair at all. It was a low blow and he knew it. My brother – besides my parents – was the only one who made life worth living. Itachi had been my rock, my world...my everything. He could simply do no wrong in my sight, and I had worshipped him like any younger brother would. To use Itachi against me like this...it just wasn't fair. When I was sure I wasn't going to burst into tears, I spun on my heels to glare coldly at him.

"I think you've done quite enough today, Asuma. You may leave."

"At least put some of them to task around the grounds until it's time for them to get off'd," he continued, completely ignoring me as usual. "Some of the purified members have begun to leave for the city and there are open vacancies in need of good workers. We could use the extra hands. How about those ones who look like they're about to croak anyway or who might be injured…like ...eh...Uzumaki Naruto for instance."

I stiffened.

"…instead of leaving him to be tortured day in and day out down there, and being completely useless, put him to work."

"You are suggesting I allow a murderer to walk around the grounds, Asuma? You expect me to allow an unpurified sinner to wander the grounds? Are you out of your damn mind?"

"You make it sound like the guy's killed a whole bunch of people. You read his folder, Sasuke. You know as well as I do that he would never have done such a thing -"

"But he did -"

"Because the occasion called for it -"

"…he is unclean…"

"He is only human -"

"…unfit for the ground…"

"You would have done the same thing in that position, Sasuke! Open those damn eyes of yours and see reason!"

"I will NOT have a murderer working on the sacred grounds of my clan!" I yelled with a loud slam of my fist against the wall.

We were both breathing heavily and glaring at each other with plain animosity. I hated having to argue with him, but he was leaving me with no choice.

"Get out of my office," I finally said quietly but firmly. "Please…leave…before we do something we regret."

Asuma snorted and gave me a mock bow. "I was already leaving, my Lord. Wouldn't want to sully the precious Uchiha grounds with my presence."

"Asuma…" I growled with growing impatience.

"I'm going. I'm going. Jesus fucking Christ. You really do need to get laid and fast."

I gasped at the insult and insinuation; feeling my cheeks burn even as his smirk and receding figure did nothing to cool my humiliation. How dare he suggest that everything will be solved with…with…_that_? He was no different from that pervert Orochimaru.

And yet…

"You are extremely tense, my Lord," Haku observed as his soft yet strong hands worked their magic on my shoulders.

Several long hours later, I was now lying face down on my futon with nothing but a white towel covering my buttocks, while receiving one of the many luxuries my manservant provided me. The _shoji_ screens leading to the back gardens was open to let in some of the cool night air, and with the sweet-smelling candles, incense and oils Haku had at his disposal, I felt more relaxed than I had in weeks.

"It was a tiring day," I agreed with a soft sigh as my lashes grew heavier with his ministrations. His hands were moving down to my lower back; a sensitive region for me all things considered. I couldn't help my body's natural reaction to the touch, and had to adjust a little to ease my 'growing' discomfort.

"Well, I hope I can please my Lord this evening," Haku said softly; his hands moving back up to my shoulders to massage the tight knots there.

I grunted and turned my head to the other side; keeping my eyes closed though I was again – accosted with those blue eyes that wouldn't let me go.

Disdain. Disgust. Anger. All emotions reserved for me.

_/He shot my girlfriend…the woman I loved more than anything else in the world…/_

I wondered what this girl must have been like; this girl that would drive him to commit a sin of such grave magnitude. Had his so-called love been that intense? Was love enough reason to forgive a sinner like that?

"Haku?" I suddenly called out wearily as I forced my lashes open.

"Yes, My Lord?"

"…am I…do you think me heartless?"

Why on earth did I need his opinion? What was I hoping for? His approval? Was I really allowing Asuma's words to get to me this much?

Haku's hands had stilled a little at the question, and I could almost see the wheels spinning in his head as he struggled to say the right thing without upsetting me.

"My Lord…you have done some good things," he finally replied diplomatically.

"You didn't answer my question."

"I'm sorry, my Lord, but I can't…"

"Never mind," I interrupted with a heavy sigh and lowered my lashes again. "It's not important."

But in a way it was. If my brother was still alive...would he approve of me? Of what I had become? He had been a great fighter even at that age as no one had been able to defeat him in the dojo. I always wanted to make him proud of me; to show that I could be as strong as he was.

(so tell me, nii-san...would I make you proud today? Or would you despise the path I have chosen?)

My body trembled as Haku's hands traveled beneath the towel to work on my upper thighs and then to my clenched buttocks. I was still a little uncomfortable at him being this intimate, but he had a job to do, and I had to remind myself that it was nothing more than a task to be accomplished. I bit my lower lip to stifle a groan as his hands molded the gluteal muscles before kneading them tenderly...thoroughly...and with an expertise that was downright wonderful. My toes began to curl with a pleasure that I could not deny; no matter how much I tried to tell myself that it didn't matter. It was only the body's natural reaction to such intimate touches after all. My heart was definitely not into it at all.

(what is he doing right now?)

A hand slipped between my butt crack, and I jerked automatically in response.

"Sorry, my Lord," Haku breathed in a voice that told me he was anything but apologetic. He sounded like he was short of breath, and his breathing was indeed becoming shallow and uneven. The poor fool. It was his only opportunity to touch me after all; so why not indulge his fantasy? Stopping him now would be a cruel thing to do.

(is he locked in the bowels of the earth cursing me with every breath he takes?)

My servant's fingers brushed against my testicles...once...twice...three times (definitely no accident now) and I bit hard into the pillow.

(is he thinking of me? Wishing he could kill me? Wishing he could inflict some kind of pain on me?)

My penis was a hard rock object against my torso and it hurt…even to breathe. I was aching in a way that was inexplicable to my senses, and though I had masturbated myself to relief just a few times in the past…tonight…tonight felt…different…

(are those eyes burning with hate?)

...intense...

I groaned and clutched the sheets tightly as Haku's hands began to knead harder…faster…

(do you hate me, Uzumaki Naruto?)

Jesus fucking Christ…Haku…oh God…don't…don't touch me…like…that…

(Just as much as I loathe, despise, and want your blood on my hands?)

The sudden parting of my butt cheeks - which left my anus exposed for only a brief moment - was more than enough to crumble my already weakening resolve. No level of self-control would have stopped what was bound to happen anyway.

(ah shit...)

I came harder than I ever have before; my low grunt of completion buried within the soft pillow while my entire body shuddered and burned with embarrassment at my moment of weakness. I was so pathetic, I could cry, and I was sure if Orochimaru had been in the room, he would have laughed his ass off at the sight I made now. Mr. Cold and Aloof and Frigid couldn't hold off his orgasm longer than five minutes.

Maybe he and Asuma were right. Maybe I did need to…

_No!_ _Do not forget what the priests taught you! You are only weakening to the pleasures of the flesh. You have to be stronger, Sasuke. For the sake of Byaku-Shinkyou._

"My…my Lord?"

"What?" I groaned in weariness.

"I apologize for daring -"

"Right. You are sorry." I turned onto my back with a small smile; my lashes half-closed since I was this close to falling asleep. His features were just as red-faced as mine probably were, but I could see he was still proud of what he had done. I reached for the towel to cover myself, sighed heavily and staggered to my feet.

"Take care of the mess," I ordered as I wiped myself and tossed the now cum-stained cloth to him. Reaching for my yukata, I slid into it and walked outside to get some fresh air. I got as far as the koi pond before stooping to my haunches to stare at the clear waters and my pale reflection.

There was a full moon tonight, and as just as the wind picked up to caress my heated skin, and I closed my eyes to worship Nature's magic…

/"…instead of leaving him to be tortured day in and day out down there, put him to work."/

_Fuck you, Asuma._

…I knew I was about to make a decision I would probably regret for the rest of my life.


	5. 05: The Others

**Notes: **Oh, third person POV, I missed you so much! *lol* All the same, this is an important chapter, so please do not skim or consider it 'filler' because it all sets the stage for what happens in the future. My sincere thanks again for all your wonderful comments/feedback! I love y'all for taking the time to do so. It really means a lot! (((hugs)))

Enjoy!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 05: <strong>

**The Others**

_This autumn will end.  
>Nothing can last forever.<br>Fate controls our lives_

_- Yosano Akiko_

_Yokoshibahikari, Chiba Prefecture_

_1.45am_

It was another quiet night; nothing much to report and only one prisoner (a local drunk) lay snoring in his cell. Officer Aoi – who just turned twenty-two about a week ago - yawned and flipped through the pages of the girlie magazine. He whistled in appreciation at the sight of Shizu-chan's double A cup-sized breasts and wondered if he could get away with jerking off for at least half-an-hour since he was all alone in the station.

His partner, Officer Kenzo, had gone off to do one more patrol around the block; something Aoi had rolled his eyes about when the older man made the announcement. Though he was technically still a rookie, Aoi did not understand why Kenzo had to be so meticulous about everything. Nothing much ever happened in this damn town except arresting the occasional drunk or dealing with a domestic brawl. People seemed more concerned with their personal business and generally stayed out of trouble.

Aoi felt he could run things on his own; after all that training to become a watchdog, he knew he was capable of being in charge. However, Kenzo – who really should have retired by now – didn't seem to want to let go of his position. The old man was pushing his late sixties, and as if that wasn't bad enough, he would always claim he was a member of the famous Uchiha clan; something Aoi scoffed at that. Everyone knew most of those guys were either dead or stuck in the North at the revered Byaku-Shinkyou, so Kenzo was clearly losing his damn mind.

_Poor guy's getting Alzheimer. Next thing you know, he'll claim he was once an emperor. _

He chuckled and flipped to the next page of the magazine; a hand absently moving down to the growing bulge within his pants.

He would have just enough time to admire the dusky nipples of Kiyoko-chan's full breasts, before the sudden explosion would rip his body into barely identifiable pieces.

* * *

><p><em>Yainazu, Fukushima Prefecture<em>

_1.45am_

"Fi…Fire!" came the strangled scream. "Fire!"

Eyes watering, stinging, burning; his throat parched and breathing extremely difficult, he coughed and tried to reach for the fire alarm; but someone else beat him to the punch. The shrill sound ricocheted off the walls of the police station, causing the few officers on duty to begin evacuation procedures as quickly as they could manage it.

"Did someone call the fire station?"

"I heard the siren! They're on their way!"

"Jesus fucking Christ! How did it start?"

"Who the hell knows? It's spreading faster, man!"

"The whole place is gonna blow any second! Evacuate the sinners! Evacuate the sinners!"

_It's not my fault. It's not my fault. It's not my fault,_ were the only words Officer Kyoya could think as he struggled to make his way out of the building. He had only gone down to the storage unit to do his nightly check of the weapons in stock. He had definitely not expected to see tendrils of smoke emanating from beneath the doors or to almost get blown to smithereens when said door suddenly exploded in splinters and ash. He was lucky to still be alive, that's for sure.

There was a mini pandemonium occurring and even as he felt himself dragged out into fresh air; even as the panicked voices of the sinners being evacuated danced within his frazzled mind, even as the locals began to trickle out of their homes to see the commotion, and even as the firemen finally arrived to do their duty; Kyoya knew there was really nothing anyone could do.

The fire had now completely consumed the building and everything within the vicinity. The home of the watchdogs was simply no more.

* * *

><p><em>Kanan, Osaka Prefecture<em>

_1.45am_

Officer Higashi Shibito was a realist.

As captain and a member of the watchdogs for over twenty-years, he had seen his share of failures and successes in this line of work. He had dealt with the worst of the worst; child predators and killers were usually at the bottom of his totem pole of sins. He never felt more rewarded than having to accost one of those sick perverts under his watch. As a father of two young boys – whose photographs sat proudly on his desk – he couldn't imagine having any of them go through what the other innocent victims must have endured. It literally made him sick to the stomach having to go to crime scenes where children – some as young as three-years-old – were found dead and mutilated especially after being sexually abused.

Yes, he could deal with the petty crimes and the drunks, but when it came to those perverted humans, they did not deserve to live another day.

He sighed and closed the folder of the latest sinner responsible for the hideous rape of seven-year-old twin girls, whose bodies had been found in the woods not far from here about a week ago. Higashi could still remember the mother's distraught tears (she was simply inconsolable), the father's stoic expression of buried shock, and as for the sinner? Currently sitting in solitary confinement before being transported to Byaku-Shinkyou tomorrow. In a way, it made Higashi wish he was still at the northern headquarters where he could personally organize the sinner's torture until Gudan.

However, as he glanced at the photographs of his family, he knew there was simply no way he could have remained there. His need to get married to his long time high-school sweetheart, settle down, and raise a family had taken precedence, hence his eventual request to be transferred. He was happy now. Happy and blessed. And in about two years, he knew he would hang up his uniform and call it a day. Retirement – at this stage of his life – didn't seem so bad. He certainly looked forward to lazy days spent on his fishing boat off the coast of Okinawa.

The sudden shrill ring of his phone had him reaching for it almost absently. Expecting it to be a report from downstairs, he was pleasantly surprised to find it was his wife on the line.

"How much longer?" she asked in that sweet voice that always brought a smile to his face.

"In a few hours, my dear." He leaned back in his chair. "I still have a lot of paperwork to complete."

"I miss you, you know," she whispered.

"And I miss you too, but I'll be home soon. I promise."

"Don't forget to pick up the sauce for the soup when you pass the store, okay?"

"What am I? Your personal errand boy?"

Her giggle made him feel warm and loved, and as he glanced at the clock, he wished time would move a little faster so he could return home and creep into bed to be by her side.

"I love you, Higashi," she muttered shyly. "We love you."

If he had any more tears to shed, he would, but he did feel his heart stir with that emotion he felt he could never get tired of. "And I love you too, Miyaki. I will see you soon, okay?"

His attention was distracted at the sight of the rookie officer hovering at his door, and he motioned with a hand for the young man to enter. Hanging up the phone, he finally noticed the man had a parcel in his hands.

"Mail?" Higashi asked with a raised brow of curiosity.

"It was left at the front of the station, sir," came the bemused reply. "I kept asking the others who it might be for, but they weren't sure either."

"Hmm." Higashi sighed and held out a hand. "Let's see it then. Might just be another misplaced delivery. I swear these mail men are slacking off at their jobs."

The younger man – he couldn't have been older than eighteen – smiled tentatively and wondered if he ought to remain in the room. Being in the presence of his boss was always intimidating after all.

Higashi eyed the box. Whoever wrapped this thing hadn't done a very good job. The brown paper was generic and the thick string in itself was frayed at the edges. It looked like it had been sent from place to place for a while, and the various stamped dates and locations made it difficult to trace its exact starting point. It wasn't even really addressed to any one person in particular. So who…?

_Shit! Shit! Shit!_

He had softened over the years, for such a stupid, silly mistake would never have escaped the Higashi of old. He should have seen the trap and signs from the moment the officer had walked into the room. And even before the final – yet barely audible – click was heard within the box, Higashi Shibito was at least allowed to have one final thought.

_I'm so so sorry, Miyaki. I guess I won't be coming home after all..._

* * *

><p><em>As heard on the ten o'clock evening news...<em>

"…with the most recent explosion in Meiwa, there have now been ten reported cases of mysterious bombings or arsons committed in various towns across the country. These attacks seem to be targeting only the police stations; something that has not escaped the Superintendent General. In a statement released last night, Councilman Shimura Danzo stated that he and his department will be working hard to catch the perpetrators of these acts of terrorism. All stations have doubled up on security and anyone looking even remotely suspicious is brought in for questioning. So far, there have been many false leads, but no concrete suspects arrested or claiming responsibility for the attacks. Over a hundred police officers have either been killed or injured due to these events; something that has left many in these towns worried and concerned for their safety…"

* * *

><p><em>Haku<em>

Knowing his master's routine by now, he waited patiently – almost an hour after Lord Sasuke was done reading his passages – to finally excuse himself. His master could be quite stubborn even when it came to that natural instinct - _sleep_. He would watch as the young lord studied for hours on end until the wee hours of the morning, and even when his head would begin to nod or droop in weariness, Sasuke would force himself awake with a jerk; literally slap his cheeks and try to focus on the scrolls or books before him. It was cute to see his master that vulnerable and 'human'; for watching Lord Sasuke at work during the day could be difficult. The Sasuke he knew at night or in his private quarters was sometimes a far cry from the detached, aloof, and ruthless captain that was feared by everyone. Well, mostly everyone.

When alone, Sasuke did like his peace and quiet. He always favored Haku playing on his _shamisen_ or listening to classical music on the radio, and though his master had the opportunity to have a television, he did not seem to like watching it or want one in his room. He was definitely more relaxed when he was away from the administrative side of his work, but not so much as to completely let go of his inhibitions. Haku was yet to see his master laugh out loud about anything or to give a _genuine_ smile of warmth and not one of sadistic pleasure or triumph.

However, the other night when Haku had performed the massage…needless to say, it was definitely a side of his master he had never seen before. Besides the bodily reaction to his touches (seeing his mater orgasm had been more than rewarding for Haku), it was the quiet almost tentative question Sasuke had asked that still stuck with him.

_/Do you think me heartless? / _

It was puzzling; perplexing that his master would even want to get some kind of answer from him – a mere lowly servant who was nothing more than a tool or weapon to be used at will. Haku was under no pretense that Sasuke saw him as anything but that. For most of his life, he had been raised to believe that was the case. His individuality would have to remain on the back burner, while he pleased others to the best of his abilities.

It was the role Lord Orochimaru had set for him the moment he was brought to Byaku-Shinkyou almost thirteen years ago.

Orphaned at a young age (his parents had been killed by wandering _ronin_ who also set fire to their small home in the countryside), his life had been spent on the streets surviving on a day to day basis while praying for death. Every day was a lesson in survival, for sustenance included rummaging through trash, hunting for rats, stealing, or begging strangers for something to eat. He slept in abandoned homes or on doorsteps, and in the bitter winter, would sneak into stables to snuggle between fat, muddy pigs or if he was lucky, warm hay among horses.

Like most orphans that roamed the street, he was seen as nothing more than an object; sometimes kicked around and bullied by the bigger kids (or adults) who seemed to take pleasure in humiliating him. He had always been a quiet kid, hardly speaking unless spoken to, and would never scream or fight back much while he was tormented. Many a time had he run away; naked and crying while he was flogged or stones thrown at him. Sometimes he would be left for dead; having lost consciousness after a particularly harrowing time with his tormentors.

It was how Kimimaro had found him; almost frozen and half-dead in the snow just on the outskirts of town. Drifting in and out of consciousness, Haku had barely registered the sound of footsteps _crunch, crunching_ on the thick snow before they came to a stop beside him.

"Is it dead?" someone had asked impatiently. "I really do not understand why I have to pick up every stray rat we come across, Kimimaro."

"I'm sorry, my Lord, but…" Haku was nudged gently with a black boot. "This one seems alive."

The loud neigh of a horse and a light grunt signaled someone getting off a horse. Haku did not know who they were…did not care to know who they were…he just wanted to _live_; to get out of his hell and to find salvation somewhere…_anywhere_.

"It's a girl," came the low voice of disdain. His body was nudged again; this time a little harder. "I will not have females in Byaku-Shinkyou. I already told you that. Let's go."

_No…please…don't leave me…_

"What in the…?" Kimimaro stopped as he felt the light tug on the hem of his _hakama_. He looked down to see the frail, pale hand; trembling but still holding on tight to the cloth.

"Pl…" Haku tried; _really tried_ to get the word out of his frozen lips, but he just couldn't seem to form them. Tears of frustration filled his eyes. He was hurting and bleeding in several places. He couldn't even run after them if he wanted to. There was no doubt these men were powerful leaders; at least one of them was a watchdog, but unlike the simple black uniforms the others wore in the town, this man must have been a high-ranking official. Either way, Haku knew he was taking a big risk by being so bold. Nothing stopped them from killing him off and ending his miserable life.

"What's holding us?" came the annoyed rasp from the other man.

"She's not letting me go, my Lord," Kimimaro replied with a light shrug. "Perhaps we can find some use for her…"

"I am not running a goddamn orphanage!"

"But my Lord…"

Orochimaru gave a long-suffering sigh, shook his head, and mounted his horse again. "I swear, Kimimaro, you will be the death of me someday. I thought I had managed to eradicate that kind streak of yours."

"I apologize…"

"Save it for another day. Until then, I do not want to see the little runt around the grounds. She will be your responsibility. Is that clear?"

"Yes, my Lord."

"One month with her and then she's gone."

The horse gave another neigh and with a sharp command from its rider, galloped away in a cloud of snow, leaving Kimimaro and his new ward to look at each other for a long minute.

"Well…I guess it's just you and me now," the white-haired man said as he shrugged out of his overcoat to drape it around Haku before lifting the tiny body within his arms. "You are all sticks and bones," he muttered to himself. "Guess you need a good meal and then…then we'll figure out what the hell to do with you."

It had taken almost two days for Haku to recover, and that was because true to his word, Kimimaro did look after him like a doting father. Looking back now, Haku was sure it was a side of the older man that Orochimaru hated to see or would not acknowledge or perhaps did not really know. Either way, Haku had vowed there and then to give his life to the officer with the beautiful face. His life was Kimimaro's, whether he wanted to accept it or not. It was also during this time – when he was finally given a bath – that his real sexual identity was revealed.

"Lucky you then," Kimimaro had said with a smile and a ruffle of Haku's long hair. "Guess we can talk my Lord into letting you stay."

Now cleaner, well-fed and rested, Haku was presented to Orochimaru at the end of the month; much to the older man's delight. He didn't mind that he was inspected like a newly purchased item, or that Orochimaru now had a gleam of devilish intent within those serpent-like eyes, Haku was just happy that he was accepted and 'loved' by someone.

"You are a very beautiful child," Orochimaru had praised with a caress of Haku's cheek. "But come, I want to introduce you to someone. You just might be interested in him."

That 'someone' would turn out to be Lord Sasuke, who had been training in the dojo at the time. The then eight-year-old was engaged in a spar with a much older student, but it was clear that Sasuke already had skills that rivaled any veteran fighter. He was small, but his speed was exceptional. Hence his ability to dodge blows coming at him from his opponent was a sight to behold. Haku wasn't aware he had been holding his breath in awe (and perhaps jealousy), until the order was given for the fighters to acknowledge the presence of their Lord and Master.

"Look, Sasuke-kun," Orochimaru said with an indulgent smile as the presented Haku (who bowed in respect to the older boy). "I brought you a new playmate. His name is Haku. Don't you think he's lovely?"

Haku had looked up shyly; only to wince inwardly at the cold glare he received from the panting boy before him. Still drenched with sweat from his spar and not exactly in the mood for Orochimaru's gimmicks, Sasuke had only scowled in distaste before replying flatly,

"I don't need a playmate."

He slammed back the protective mask over his face and with a barely noticeable bow of acknowledgement to Orochimaru, jogged back to the mat to face another opponent.

Haku tried to mask his disappointment and hurt at being rejected so openly, but Orochimaru only patted his shoulders in reassurance. "He's always like that. Such a grouchy, ungrateful little bastard, but he'll come around. Until then…" He looked closely at Haku. "You might want to learn a few tricks yourself."

"My...my Lord?"

"Well if you're going to remain at Byaku-Shinkyou, you might as well learn how to fight. So…which is going to be your weapon of choice? The sword or the gun?"

Haku swallowed tightly and stole another glance at Sasuke who was going at it with his _bokken_ in a manner so effortless and yet intense, it was beautiful to watch.

"The…the sword," Haku finally whispered. _I want to be just like him. To be as strong as him. To make him like me someday and have him respect me._

"The sword it is," Orochimaru had announced. "And I have just the teacher to help you with that." He snapped his fingers. "Fetch that brat Momichi Zabuza!"

_Momichi Zabuza._

It would be the beginning of a friendship/relationship that would last for quite a long time. Though – to be honest – the teenager had scared the shit out of him at first sight; and hadn't always been the most patient of teachers. Still, Haku knew he owed a lot to Zabuza's teaching and reluctant friendship. He was not only able to hone his _taijutsu_ and sword-fighting skills, but he also became adept at other weapons including throwing knives – which were his personal favorite. And although Zabuza wasn't much of a talker, he did _listen_ and didn't seem to mind if Haku talked his ear off during moments of rest between trainings.

It was Zabuza he turned to when the 'other things' had started. The first time the 'other thing' happened, Haku hadn't really understood what role he was to play. All he knew was that he was being groomed for something; for he was taught how to wear more effeminate clothing, play the _shamisen_, and learn how to entertain the guests Orochimaru invited to his private quarters. He usually ignored the lecherous looks that came his way as he'd serve the older men during the dinner parties or when he was made to dance for them. At thirteen years old, he and about ten other boys who looked like him (pretty that is) were almost always at these weird parties. It wasn't until he found himself in a private room with one such guest, did Haku finally realize just what his new role had become.

He couldn't really remember all the events of that night, but did know he awoke the next day with an inexplicable soreness in his buttocks and groin area. He had nearly screamed at the sight of the blood that still trickled from his anus, but had bore the pain and allowed himself to be purified. Orochimaru had praised him for doing such a good job, and Haku – as naïve and gullible as he had been – truly believed he was doing the right thing.

It was Zabuza who had told him otherwise. The older boy would all but shake him for being such a damn fool and allowing himself to be used by Orochimaru.

"You're nothing but a sex slave to his sick friends!" he'd scream after a particularly strenuous spar session. "Is that what you want to be for the rest of your life? Some sex slave for Orochimaru and his cohorts?"

"But…but…" _That's all I'm good for,_ Haku would argue within himself. As he'd lay on the futon and allow his body to be toyed with (all the while fighting tears of humiliation or pain during each session), he wondered if Zabuza was right after all. Was this really what his life would continue to be? To be nothing more than a vessel for these men to pour their frustrations upon? With every thick spurt of semen left within him, Haku felt himself die a little more inside. Even with all the purification rites he was made to go through, he still felt unclean…sullied…tainted.

He could remember eventually sobbing in resignation in Zabuza's arms one night they had sat on a roof simply staring at the landscape in companionable silence. He must have muttered something about wanting to die or kill himself, and either to shut him up or to show him otherwise, Zabuza had finally silenced him with a kiss…his first real kiss that didn't consist of large quantities of saliva being shoved into his mouth and down his throat.

Did he love Zabuza? He wasn't sure. He did know that being in his arms was definitely better than being with those other bastards. He would eventually come to find refuge in Zabuza after his 'duties' for Lord Orochimaru, finding pleasure and comfort within those strong arms that would never hurt him. However, they both knew it was a relationship that would have to be kept a secret, and it did work for a while until Zabuza was suddenly given a transfer order.

"It's because he knows about us," Zabuza had deduced as Haku clung to him desperately. "He's getting rid of anyone who will get in the way."

"I hate him," came the whisper filled with venom.

Zabuza laughed and tipped Haku's chin gently. "Get in line then. You're not the only one who wants to see his guts spilled all over the floor, but until we find someone with balls enough to step up to him…we just have to wait."

Wait? For how long would he have to wait? How long would they _all_ have to wait? Haku wasn't sure if that day would ever come, but he was aware that there was something happening…something about to change the course of their history. Perhaps it was in the way Zabuza had spoken to Sasuke-sama the other day. There had been no fear…no real concern for his future, and when their eyes had met, Haku had seen _something_ within those sharp black eyes. Zabuza had secrets to share, and this was why Haku found himself walking briskly across the courtyards this cold night to find the answers.

He had to wait until he was sure his master was completely asleep before daring to leave the private quarters, otherwise he would have risked having to field questions about his decision to see his long-lost friend and partner.

"Halt," came the sudden sharp cry which had Haku gasping in mild panic. "Who goes there?"

He had wrapped a thick scarf around his head, neck, and even covered his nose and mouth with the cloth. However, he lowered it a little to reveal most of his face to the guard stationed before the path leading to the East Block.

"Ah, Haku-san," came the familiar greeting as the other man relaxed. "What brings you here this time of the night?"

"I have a message for Officer Fudo," Haku lied and showed just a bit of a scroll (which actually contained nothing) within his kimono. "From Sasuke-sama. It's urgent."

At the mention of his master's name, the guard stiffened and saluted before stepping aside. It never ceased to amaze him how his master's name could elicit such a reaction, and Haku thanked his lucky stars (for the one-millionth time) that Sasuke had finally chosen and accepted him as a servant.

He would still never know the real reason behind Sasuke's decision, but it had all happened when his master turned eighteen and Lord Orochimaru had thrown a large party for the very blasé birthday boy. It had been a big brouhaha, with Orochimaru decorating the large banquet hall with the finest silks, the richest trinkets, the most expensive foods and wines, dancers and musicians from India, and a cake that was large enough to feed the entire police force on the compound. However, the guest list was mostly made up of officers and a few of Orochimaru's buddies. There was hardly anyone of Sasuke's age, let alone anyone that could be considered a _friend_ to share such a milestone with him, and though he had been dressed in a custom-made silk kimono (yet another gift from Orochimaru) and looked positively resplendent, one seemed to get the feeling he was only there to please the older man and nothing more.

Haku could still remember watching the parade of young men brought before Sasuke for him to make a selection. As per Lord Orochimaru's tastes, they were of the same stock; beautiful and pliable.

"You're becoming a man now," Orochimaru had stated with a flourish. "You will need someone to be at your beck and call and to assist with your duties. I know you want to do every damn thing on your own, my dear, but trust me; having a man servant is very important. Now then…" He picked and sucked on a strawberry from the tray Haku was holding out to him and grinned at Sasuke. "Pick one or two, doesn't matter to me."

_Pick none of them,_ Haku had secretly prayed; though he was dismayed at even thinking of that in the first place. There was just no way Sasuke would have even looked twice at him. In fact, he was sure since that day at the dojo, Sasuke had barely said more than ten complete sentences to him in ten years. So why in the world would he even assume he'd be considered for the role?

"Anyone?" Sasuke had drawled lazily. There was a mysterious small smile on his face now, and Haku couldn't help the flush of color that came to his cheeks as he felt the weight of those piercing dark eyes fall on him for the briefest of moments. He lowered his gaze and had to grip the tray a little tighter so its contents wouldn't spill to the floor.

"Anyone at all," Orochimaru replied. Even he couldn't contain his enjoyment at this moment. He cradled his chin within a palm and waved toward the buffet of eager young men, who were all but literally drooling and begging to be chosen. I mean, who wouldn't? This was only THE Lord Uchiha Sasuke, who everyone knew was the most respected first captain and fighter in Byaku-Shinkyou. He wasn't bad on the eyes either, and being a manservant to a man like him would be the highest of honors!

"Then I pick…" Sasuke paused; pretended to examine each blushing male before him intensely, before giving a sigh (as if suddenly weary of the game) and pointing his chopsticks at the young man kneeling beside Orochimaru's chair.

"Him."

Orochimaru looked bemused. Haku even more confused. He even glanced behind him to be sure there was no one else lurking there. But there wasn't. Unless Sasuke had a thing for bronzed statues of gods. He turned back to see Sasuke was indeed staring at him. By this time, Orochimaru had straightened up in his chair; his eyes flashing with mischief and obvious interest.

"You want Haku?" he asked as if wanting to be sure of exactly what his stubborn ward was requesting.

Sasuke shrugged lightly. "You did say I could pick anyone, or were there limits to who was available?"

"And here I thought you didn't want a playmate."

Sasuke's cheeks burned at the reminder of his rudeness all those years ago, but he kept his gaze stubbornly trained on the older man. It was clear he wasn't going to back out of this.

"All right then. You may have Haku, although I will miss him," Orochimaru added as he pet Haku's head lightly as if he were nothing more than a house cat. "He has given me many nights of pleasure after all."

If the ground had cracked open at the very moment, to swallow them all whole, Haku would have welcomed it gladly. Not only had Orochimaru managed to cheapen him to nothing more than 'used goods', Haku wondered if Sasuke-sama was now having regrets at having chosen him. The last thing he wanted to do was give his new master the impression that he was only good in the bedroom, and later on that night – as he had knelt uncertainly outside Sasuke-sama's door – he was pleasantly stunned to hear the young man's curt instructions.

"I am not like them," Sasuke had announced succinctly. "So you can be rest assured your body will not be tarnished any longer. You will be my manservant, but only for the usual things and nothing more. If anything extra is required of you, I'll let you know."

Haku had really not planned to burst into tears of gratitude, but they had come anyway. He knew his sobs were embarrassing to his new master, but he couldn't control them even if he wanted to. For the first time since Zabuza had left him all alone (and Kimimaro when he thought of it) there was someone else who saw him as more than an object of desire. And just as he had vowed to give up his life to those who genuinely cared for him, Haku swore there and then that he would become Sasuke's shadow, even if it meant taking a bullet for him.

He reveled in being Sasuke's closest companion on a daily basis, even if his master rarely spoke and had the tendency to lose his temper often. In the year plus they had been together, Haku had come to learn so much (and yet nothing at all) about a young man he had admired and worshipped in silence for ten years. He had seen sides of Sasuke that no one else could understand, and it hurt (and annoyed him) when he overhead other servants or soldiers mocking his master behind his back.

Stepping into the cool confines of the East Block was always disturbing to Haku. The security here was much tighter than the other places, and as one of the guards began to lead him past the steel gates - with seemingly a thousand locks - and into the dank bowels of the earth, Haku shuddered and prayed he would never end up in such a place.

The East Block, simply put – was the torture chamber. Catacombs devoted to the most cruel devices and methods to place any human being through, could be found in here. Even before they had gone past the first level, Haku's nostrils were already filled with the stench of pain, suffering, and death. He could hear the faint screams of agony coming from deeper within the caves; a sign that yet another sinner (or sinners) were going through their rites of passage. It was colder down here as well causing Haku to wrap his scarf a little tighter around his body.

"Officer Fudo will be here shortly," the guard said as they came to a stop on level five. The levels went as far down as ten; with level ten reserved for those sinners bound for Gudan. Haku had heard horrific stories of what those sinners had to go through, and goodness knew he wouldn't have wished that on anyone.

"You can wait here…"

"Uum…could you tell me which room Momichi Zabuza was sent to? I believe he was brought here a few days ago?" Haku asked breathlessly. He could see the guard's brow rise in bemusement, but since this was Sasuke-sama's personal manservant…who was he to question his decision to see anyone?

"Momichi Zabuza is a level below," the guard finally replied. "Just walk down the steps; first cell on your right."

"Thank you." He was almost about to bow, but then remembered that guards were technically below him in status.

He could feel the guard's gaze trained on him as he descended the uneven stone steps. He felt his heart in his throat as the hollowed screams of torture echoed and bounced off the cave walls. He wondered if Zabuza was still undergoing any right now, but he doubted it. Just the thought alone made him want to throw up. Now out of sight of the guard, Haku felt he could breathe again; however there was another set of them on this particular level, but they both seemed engaged in a card game and paid no attention to the slender figure who did his best to slip past them unnoticed.

_First cell on right, first cell on right, first cell on right, _Haku thought frantically. It was hard to tell since most of the cells here seemed to be carved right from the caves themselves. He had to hold his nose as he walked past several; blood, feces, urine, and that sickly stench of ripe wounds churned his stomach. He would have walked right past the very man he was looking for, if it wasn't for the familiar low rasp as his name was called.

"Haku…?"

_Zabuza-san!_

He spun around and then stooped to his haunches before the cell; his eyes welling with tears as they struggled to make out the figure of the man he considered a friend and lover. It was hard to see anything at first, since the dungeon was so dark, and the lanterns on the outside didn't really illuminate much, but eventually Haku's eyes adjusted and he gasped at the state of the man who had revealed his well-built body many times in the past.

The once proud officer was now a shadow of his former self. Zabuza was literally caked in blood for he had been flogged – goodness knew how many times – until strips of his flesh literally dangled off his body. His face was swollen; his eyes nearly shut with whatever beating he must have received. His nose and lips were clearly broken and cracked, and when he tried to speak, it was an effort in itself.

Haku couldn't believe it. His hands trembled around the steel grilles and his sob of misery was almost thunderous in the relative silence.

"Zabuza-san," he moaned; wishing he could stretch his hand in to touch the older man, but there wasn't even room to do so. "What have they done to you?"

Zabuza, who was lying prone on the ground and could barely lift his head, tried to chuckle bitterly; but even that alone wracked a new wave of pain that had him sucking in a harsh breath.

"Your master did this to me, remember?" he tried to sneer and the end result was a ghastly expression that made Haku shudder. "That man you work for…did this to me."

_Sasuke-sama…_

Haku was torn. His loyalties to Sasuke did take precedence over Zabuza's plight, and yet seeing his partner in this condition lit a dull flame of anger at this unjust punishment. Could he really blame Sasuke-sama for this?

"I will probably die here," Zabuza was saying, and Haku – already grief-stricken – couldn't and wouldn't bear to think of it.

"No, you won't," he whispered harshly. "You'll be out of here soon. You've got to survive, Zabuza-san. You promised you'd get me out of here someday, right? One day, Sasuke-sama will get tired of me and then what will I do? Where will I go? I need you, Zabuza-san."

"Stop it," came the harsh reprimand, though it was clear that Haku's words had affected him. Though his eyes were almost shut, it wasn't hard to see the pain yet determination in them. "Stop your crying, Haku. That won't get us anywhere, remember?"

The servant could only sniffle and nod softly in agreement.

"Besides, I really don't know why you came down here…to see me…like this…"

"I had to see you…"

"You're a fool then."

"I don't care."

Zabuza looked up again to stare at the younger man, who was so close yet so far away. He hated to see Haku crying. It annoyed him, yet made his heart break a million times over. Hadn't he once foolishly told the young man that he would never make him cry?

He tried to crawl a little closer – to at least touch that beautiful face – before his life was extinguished. It was the only thing that kept him alive to be honest, but first…

"There is something I have to tell you," Zabuza whispered. He crawled another inch and had to pause to take a break. His body felt like it was falling to pieces with every movement. "Lean closer, Haku."

The servant did as he was told; watching with bated breath as Zabuza forced himself to move again. "How many guards are out there?"

"Just two," Haku replied.

Zabuza nodded and lowered his head to catch his breath. When he spoke, Haku really had to strain his ears to catch all of what he was saying.

"The revolution…is starting," Zabuza seemed to be saying. He licked his bloodied lips and struggled to continue. "All over the country…they are beginning to rise up against the watchdogs…against Orochimaru and his doctrines."

"What?" Haku was confused. He really did not understand what was being said to him as he tended to steer clear of such politically-charged topics.

"Listen to me," Zabuza hissed impatiently. He lifted his head and this time his gaze burned with passion and intensity. "It's only a matter of time before they come back here to take his head... even that one you call a master. Though he's too stupid to realize that they are doing all this for him."

_What in the world is he talking about? Someone was after Sasuke-sama's life? Wh…why?_

"You tell him to watch his back," Zabuza panted. He could barely speak now. "You protect that son-of-a-bitch with everything you've got. There are some people…out there…who want…who want…everything…destroyed...we…we were all fighting…for the cleansing…"

Zabuza was clearly rambling now, and Haku was deathly afraid of what he had just heard. He could hear the guards approaching and knew that his time was up.

"Zabuza-san," he whispered desperately. "Please survive. I beg of you. Until then, I will keep what you've said to heart. I have vowed to be Sasuke-sama's shield and will protect him as best I can, but you must keep your end of the bargain and live. Please."

"Who's there?" came the harsh call, which had Haku rising quickly to his feet; covering his nose and mouth again and lowering his gaze to the ground just as the guards made the turn to see him.

"Who are you?" the second barked, and then stilled when Haku lifted his head. "Ah, my apologies Haku-san. But what are you doing down here?"

"I was looking for Officer Fudo," Haku lied.

"Officer Fudo is off duty. Is there any message we can deliver to him?"

Haku glanced quickly towards Zabuza's cell, and felt his heart sink when that body barely seemed to move a muscle.

"No," he finally whispered thickly and with heaviness in his heart. "There is nothing you can do now. Absolutely nothing at all."

* * *

><p><em>Shikamaru<em>

"Welcome back."

A snort. "Now he finally comes to see me." A hairy hand reached out with an offering. "Smoke?"

"Don't mind if I do."

He plucked a cigarette from the box, placed it between his cold lips and allowed it to be lit by the bigger, older man. He waited for the familiar rush of nicotine to infiltrate his lungs, before letting it out with a sigh of relief.

"Cold night," his companion observed dryly. Tendrils of smoked danced off his cigarette as he spoke, coupled with the one emitted from between his lips.

"Winter's here."

"Hn."

They fell into amiable silence; watching the sway of the trees with the night breeze. From their perch on the roof of the townhouse, Byaku-Shinkyou was beautiful beneath the pale glow of the moon. Its haunting silence broken only by the sounds of several guards patrolling the grounds or the occasional rustle of the leaves with the breath of wind.

Shikamaru flicked aside some ash and raised his knees to his chest. He stared morosely out to the mountains and once again thought of the one he had left behind.

"How is she?" he finally asked quietly.

"All right. Much livelier than the last time I saw her. Doctors say she might be leaving soon – give or take a month."

Shikamaru felt his heart lurch with relief, and he had to close his eyes for a moment to gather himself.

"How much do you have today?"

Shikamaru dug into his kimono to withdraw the folded bills. "Last month's pay. Hardly enough I know, but it should help…right?"

His companion accepted the money and counted the notes carefully beneath his breath. He nodded and tucked it within his yukata before sighing heavily. "Every bit helps, kid. She's still holding you to that wedding. You know that, right?"

Shikamaru had the grace to blush. "Yeah…as soon as I get out of here, that's the first thing we're going to do."

"How much longer did they say?"

He scoffed absently at a piece of the roof's red tiles with a toe. "One more year. One more year in this dump then I'm out."

"Heh, at least you survived. Count yourself lucky."

"Ain't that the truth. Just remind me never to get involved with the Syndicate again."

Asuma's hearty laughter erupted from deep within his gut before he could control himself. He flicked aside some ash from his cigarette before stealing a glance at his partner. He seemed to debate within himself on whether or not to bring up the topic, but he must have noticed something in the younger man's eyes that made him go "fuck it".

"I saw something rather interesting the other day, kiddo. Something related to your silly little crime."

Shikamaru raised a brow, but said nothing.

Not deterred, Asuma continued quietly. "There was a new sinner brought in about a week ago. Blond hair…blue eyes…"

"Uzumaki Naruto," Shikamaru replied quickly, which caused Asuma to blink in surprise.

"Oh? He's already popular, eh?"

"Not really," came the careful reply. "He's been in the East Block for the past two days now, right? Been locked in his dungeon before that. Poor bastard. He's hardly seen fresh air besides the inspection."

"Hmm."

"What?"

"Didn't you find him…different?"

"In what way? That he talks too damn much when you let him?"

Asuma chuckled, but it was a half-hearted attempt. His brows were soon furrowed in thought. "Those scars on his face…"

"Yeah…those definitely stand out…"

"Don't you remember the history of the family who once had scars like that? A long time ago?"

Shikamaru glanced at the older man in confusion. "I don't get…"

"Ever heard of the Senju Syndicate?"

_Senju Syndicate?_ "Jesus, those guys were wiped out like…centuries ago."

Asuma shrugged and took another drag. "That's right. You could consider them the godfathers of organized crime, oh clueless buddy of mine. If you think the Bakufu are the shit now, you should have seen the Senju back then. They fucking owned Japan. In fact, they were so big, their empire extended all the way to China, Hong Kong, Korea, the United States, and even our neighbors upstairs…Russia. They controlled _everything_."

"Wow…"

"Wow, indeed."

"So how…I mean if they were so fucking huge…how did they get wiped out?"

"The head of the Senju Syndicate wanted to become legitimate. He basically wanted to take the underground to the 'upper' ground; to get respect as true businessmen instead of dealing with the darker, illegal side of things. I guess he was getting sick of all the murders and drug dealings his syndicate was becoming known for. Anyway, as you can well imagine, this wasn't received well by everyone and the syndicate began to fight within itself. Factions rose against factions; those who wanted to be 'good' and those who wanted to remain in the 'dark'. Get it?"

Shikamaru nodded.

"Well, turns out those who wanted to remain in the dark won, and in about five years, the Senju Syndicate as we knew it was no more. Its new leader renamed themselves as the Bakufu, and the rest – as they say – is history."

"What happened to the old head?"

"Assassinated. He and anyone related to him. For years the Bakufu sought out anyone who was remotely related to the Senju clan because they feared there would be another uprising; those ready to take back the syndicate from the Bakufu. They did their homework all right and probably got them all, but I'm guessing that our new friend here came from a family who managed to escape the persecution."

"…wouldn't they suspect he was a member of the Senju with the way he looks?"

"Pfft. This war happened back in the 19th century, Shikamaru. Do you really think the bosses and dime-and-nickel yakuza these days really give a shit about something that happened so long ago? If any of them took the time to read through the history of their precious Bakufu, I'm sure they would have read about many members of the Senju with those scars on their faces. It's a rare thing, but a dead give away of who they really are."

Shikamaru frowned in thought. If what Asuma was saying was true, then it meant that the young man being tortured within the bowels of the earth – at this very moment - was actually the true predecessor and leader of one of the most feared syndicates in all of Japan.

_Holy shit._

"I know what you're thinking," Asuma said quietly, "but I can assure you that even if it were possible to want to take over, it won't happen without some major bloodshed. Besides, the Senju are so diluted now, it's hard to find anyone willing to want to pick up a sword or gun to fight these days. He might be one of the last pure members of the clan, but it doesn't mean he'd want to be in charge of something like that."

That was true. Having seen a bit of Naruto's personality, Shikamaru could not reconcile the notion of that blond moron being the leader of the yakuza anytime soon. It just wasn't going to happen.

"This is why you are going to be his bodyguard, Shikamaru."

"Huh?" He looked up with widened eyes filled with confusion. "What the hell…?"

"All I'm saying is that you keep him under your care. I don't think Lord Orochimaru knows about this yet, but I have a feeling that once he gets wind of Naruto being here, he's going to use that kid for whatever diabolical plan he's got in mind….just as he's been using Sasuke all these years."

"What?"

"Oops. I spoke too much."

Asuma smiled, though it didn't quite reach his eyes. Shikamaru was dying to know more, but with Asuma now rising to his feet and stretching his large frame while yawning, he knew he was going to get nothing else from his friend tonight.

"Get some sleep, Shika-chan."

"Stop calling me that."

Asuma snickered and reached out to pet the pouting man's head gently. "Seriously though, get some rest. I know I heaped a lot of info on you tonight, but you're a smart kid and I know you'll do the right thing."

He sighed and looked toward the mountains; a pensive expression now on his visage. "The tides are beginning to change, Shikamaru. The rumblings are becoming a little louder, and it will only be a matter of time before we all have to deal with our fates."

Shikamaru opened his mouth to ask just what he meant by that, but Asuma was already descending the ladder to return to his quarters, but not before waving a hand in farewell. Snorting in frustration, he remained motionless for almost half-an-hour, still on the roof, and lost in his troubled thoughts.

In a year, he hoped to be free to be with the woman he loved. In a year, he hoped to be walking down the aisle and exchanging vows. In a year, he hoped to be living as far away from Byaku-Shinkyou as possible. He wasn't supposed to be in this place to begin with, and he hadn't been lying to Naruto when he said he had been incarcerated for some 'stupid shit'. A night of drunken fun, with friends, had ended up with him trying to break into a house (on a dare) to steal something. Unfortunately, they had chosen the house of a Bakufu faction boss, and needless to say, Shikamaru had been charted off to prison before the sake had even worn off.

Spared from the sentence of Gudan, he had proven to be a hardworking, purified sinner (though he had to admit that the whole process was a big joke). Still, Shikamaru kept to himself, did as he was told and began to use the little money he made to pay the hospital bills for his girlfriend who had been involved in a car accident on her way to visit him here. During that time, Asuma had become an unlikely friend – probably because the officer had bummed a pack of cigarettes from him one time and they had ended up talking for the rest of the night. Shikamaru liked the older man and genuinely enjoyed his company especially when they'd play _shogi_ or _go_ (which Shikamaru won all the time).

It made living in this place a little more bearable, but still…his heart yearned for his girl and the future they could have together.

_Sigh. This is such a pain-in-the-ass, I swear._

As he began to climb down the ladder to head to the workers' quarters, Shikamaru pondered on his latest 'assignment'.

To protect Uzumaki Naruto, who could (or could not) be the likely successor to the Bakufu Syndicate nee Senju, if he was so inclined to pursue it. It might all be a big mistake. It might end up being just a fluke of Nature that Naruto had been born with those scars on his face, and that it might mean absolutely nothing at all. Hell, he could have been scratched by wild animals when he was a baby!

_Yeah, but those scars are too damn 'neat' and aligned properly to be just random scratches from weird animals, Shikamaru. You know that damn well. _

He stopped as a sudden gust of wind nearly knocked him off his feet, and as he looked up to the full moon that graced the skies over Byaku-Shinkyou, Asuma's haunting words seemed to meld and drift with the night breeze; sending a chill through his body.

_/ The tides are beginning to change, Shikamaru. The rumblings are becoming a little louder, and it will only be a matter of time before we all have to deal with our fates. /_


	6. 06: Darkness

**Notes: **Oh my God. I really cannot stand how this site always messes up my formatting. :( Anyway, onward and upward, dear readers - especially to you lovely folks who always take a moment to leave your feedback. I feel like I'm writing this for only five of you! *lol* But it's all good. As long as I still have your attention, that's all that matters to me. I'm glad the other chapter was interesting despite the lack of Sasuke-ness and Naruto-ness (at least not much of them in person), so you'll get your fill in this one. I'm switcheroo-ing between POVs, so hopefully it's not too confusing, but as someone mentioned, the plot is getting thicker and the 'outside forces' are creeping in.

Warnings for this chapter...a loooot of pain. *winces and goes into hiding*

Enjoy and see you next week! :D

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 06: <strong>

**Darkness**

_Out in the marsh reeds_

_A bird cries out in sorrow_

_As though it had recalled_

_Something better forgotten_

_= Ki no Tsurayuki_

* * *

><p><em>Drip. Drip. Creeeak. Drip. Drip. Creeeak. Drip…<em>

What day was it?

_Drip. Drip. Creeak. Drip. Drip. Creeak. Drip…_

What hour was it?

_Drip. Drip. Creeak. Drip. Drip. Creeak. Drip…_

I wandered in the darkness; stumbling and limping my way toward something I could not see. My journey seemed endless; never knowing what awaited me with every step I took. Sometimes I welcomed the darkness and the silence that would cloak me like a shield; protective, cocoon-like. It was my only refuge from a reality that I did not want to return to.

_Drip. Drip. Creeak. Drip. Drip. Creeak. Drip…_

In this darkness, I could almost feel human again. I could remember the happier moments in my life; like…like…like the many precious hours and minutes I spent with my dearest Sakura.

_Drip. Drip. Drip. Drip._

Every now and then I would smile – within this darkness – as memories of our time together drifted in and out like slides from a projector onto a movie screen. Ah, there's the slide showing when we went to the park and shared a vanilla and chocolate ice cream cone. There she was looking adorable in her pink parka and black jeans; trying to look coy as she kissed away the dollop of ice cream she had left on my nose. There we are holding hands, swinging them like children while walking down the street, sometimes window shopping when I didn't have enough money to squander on her. She would always tell me that she didn't mind me not spending a dime on her; that just having me as her boyfriend was more than enough.

_Drip. Drip. Creeeak. Drip. Drip. Jerk! Creeeeak._

Sakura, sweet Sakura. How I miss you every single day. If I could turn back the hands of time, I would. I would do everything I could to bring you back…

_Back where?_ Came the low, mocking voice that suddenly shattered my illusions of bliss. It was my Reality coming back with a vengeance, and how I wished it would not return.

_Drip. Drip. Drip. Drip. _

But return I must – as cruel as it was - and as finally forced my lashes open, the world swam before me proceeded by an intense wave of vertigo. I shut them quickly again; counted inwardly to ten before lifting them again…a lot more slowly this time.

I was floating.

No…not really, but my feet definitely seemed far away; from not just my body, but from the ground itself. The dripping sound that had infiltrated my thoughts all this time was finally visible to my dulled senses.

_Blood. _

**My** blood to be exact; dripping from my legs (back? Feet? Who the fuck knows?) onto the ground with every gentle sway of my body. A small puddle was already beginning to form, and I wondered how long it would take before I was completely drained. Aaah, that's right. Now I know why I'm in this position. I was hanging from some device attached to the roof of the cave, which would explain why I could barely feel my damn arms anymore.

It was all coming back to me like a spool of thread unraveling ever so quickly. I was woken up at an ungodly hour in my regular cell, blindfolded and dragged by those fucking guards to God knows where. Felt my yukata ripped from my body until I was completely naked, had my wrists suddenly bound with thick ropes that dug into my flesh causing them to chaff almost immediately; listened to the creaking sound of some device being cranked as I was slowly being raised off the ground with my arms stretched above my head. I must have dislocated something with how long that asshole kept cranking that thing until one of the other guards told him to "stop. I was high enough."

I won't lie. It hurt like hell, but I had vowed not to cry out in pain for anything; that I wouldn't give these fuckers the satisfaction of knowing their methods of 'purification' was nothing more than some shitty excuse for torture.

_Gudan._

That was all they kept muttering beneath their breaths…when the flogging began at least.

_Gudan. Gudan. Gudan. Gudan. _

With each crack of the whip, which I was sure had metal tips or something like it; they would chant the word in monotonous unison. I had no idea how many of them were in the room – three, five, ten? Either way, they seemed to take turns whaling on me, and I guess they were getting pissed off that I wouldn't scream out or react much because their strokes became a little more aggressive.

I must have probably passed out at some point, since the body can only take so much before the mind decides to shut down to prevent itself from going insane. Pity they wouldn't let me enjoy my moment of bliss in the darkness, as someone threw a bucket of ice cold water on me to toss me back to reality.

It was such a jolt to my system that I forgot exactly where I was – at first – and jerked so hard on my ropes that I felt another bone in my shoulders moving out of place. _Fuck!_ I gasped and panted in an effort to catch my breath, only for the blindfold to finally be removed so I could get to see their ugly faces.

I was not disappointed.

"Don't go dying yet," the guard had said with a leery grin and a lick of his thick lips. He was one of the fattest slobs I had ever seen, and considering I was sort of towering over him from my position, he was still huge enough for his face to be close to my groin area. Unlike the other guards, in their white togas and turbans, this one was dressed in a skirt made out of brown leather; stained with dark splotches I'd later come to realize as years of dried blood - and goodness knew what else - that had accumulated on it. His bare torso revealed male breasts pierced with heavy gold rings. His stomach was in folds which fell over the top of the skirt and as he moved, they jiggled like dough, which was pretty damn disgusting to watch. His bald head shone beneath the dull glow of the lanterns, and his skin – which looked bronzed – appeared to have been oiled as well. There were numerous tattoos all over his body with designs I could not recognize. However, there was one particular design that stood out from the rest. It looked like a particularly neat circle of yin and yang symbols, right above his left breast. I would later learn that this was no ordinary tattoo.

"Sinners like you don't deserve such a quick death," he continued as he jiggled away to the corner of his chamber of death.

_Fuck you too, asshole._

All the same, I was pretty damn tired, in agony, and felt incredibly dizzy. I lowered my head and tried to control my breathing; to see how much longer I could sustain my threshold for torture.

"Remember not to harm him too much," I overheard one of the guards muttering to the fat one. "He is for Gudan, so he must be preserved as much as possible."

I raised my head a little to see what was going on. The fat slob didn't look too happy at not having to punish me as much as he'd like, but he only nodded in understanding before turning back to glare at me. I guess I must have smiled or something, because it pretty much pissed him off enough for him to suddenly back hand me across the face – so hard I thought my head was going to fall off.

Fuck! That hurt like a bitch!

My whole face felt like it had been put through the grinder, and I was sure it was going to be swollen soon. I could already feel one or two teeth loosening in their sockets, and my mouth was already filling with blood. I spat it out, but it was filled quickly again. I tried to swallow some down, but it still managed to dribble down my chin and onto my chest.

"We'll see how long you can keep that smug look on your face, sinner," the fat slob growled before spitting at my face. His saliva made contact with an area above my right eye, which I had to close quickly before that damn thing (which was like phlegm) would enter it and probably blind me.

"I will take my time with you. You can be assured of that."

Great. I had made a new pal in this dump. Whoo hoo.

However, all that happened several hours (days?) ago, and now…now…_now what_? No one had come in since then, and my arms were beginning to throb again with a numbing ache that was seeping into my bones. I wondered if the longer I remained in this position, the more my limbs would stretch until both arms would be completely ripped off. It wasn't impossible. I had watched several movies where those kinds of things happened to –

_Dude, you are in a cave about to be tortured to fucking death and all you can think about is some stupid movie you watched?_

I sighed and wished I could shut my mind up. I sometimes tended to drift to other topics when trying to get away from a rather painful situation, and this certainly called for a topic of light-heartedness and…just _anything_ to get my mind off this. However, and as you can imagine, it wasn't exactly easy thinking of fun things when you generally felt like shit. I groaned and twisted my body gently, so I could rest my feverish face against an arm…

_Creeeak. Creeak. Drip. Drip. Drip. Drip…_

I hated the sound of that. My back and buttocks must be a sight to see, I was sure. I was guessing it was a whole lot more than welts on the skin now. Why else would I be bleeding like this? The other guard had said for the fat one not to over do it, which would mean that they at least still wanted me alive for the damn Gudan thing. I really still had no idea what they meant, though I got the impression that it would involve the final 'rite of purification'.

Death by hanging? Burned at the stake? Beheaded?

Whatever it was, I hoped to goodness it would be done quickly. I wasn't sure I could handle any more prolonged –

There was a sudden loud creak of a door behind me, and immediately I felt the chill seep into me as the smell of the fat one assailed my senses. I mean, he literally smelled like blood and grease, and with the way he was whistling beneath his breath; something told me I was in for a world of agony in today's session. I stiffened and held my breath; my hands forming tight fists as my buttocks automatically clenched in readiness for the now familiar sensation of the leather whip. I could feel the beads of sweat breaking out on my brow as the bastard kept whistling to himself and tinkering with his 'tools of the trade' behind me. I think that made it even worse; not knowing what he was going to do next. The only view in front of me was the jagged surface of the cave and the lanterns stuck to it. Everything else was behind me…everything and anything else that could kill me. The psychological mind fuck was slowly driving me nuts.

"Goood morning, Sinner," the fat slob greeted cheerfully as he jiggled his way around me with a hard slap on my ass. I hissed in a sharp breath at the subsequent burning sensation; wondering if my wounds were still that raw or if…

"A little salve for your wounds," he explained; holding up a palm filled with what looked like salt.

Of course. His wicked grin should have been warning enough.

I sucked in a harsh breath as he rubbed the 'salve' on my shoulders, back and buttocks; squeezing my eyes shut as the pain forced me to curl my toes and clench my fists even tighter. I bit hard on my lower lip enough to draw blood, but swore I would not cry out in distress.

"Still not caving in, eh?" He had the gall to look a little disappointed when I lifted my lashes to appraise him. "You sure are a stubborn one. Let's see how well you do with this then…"

_Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck!_

I jerked so hard on the rope that it nearly gave way. It felt as if he was pouring liquid fire on me, and I could barely breathe when he was done. I sucked in several gasps of air; eyes widened as they focused on the ground in what could be a combination of shock and suppressed suffering.

This bastard was going to kill me. I just knew it. Gudan be damned.

"Impressive indeed," he praised as he came to a stop before me again. He licked his lips and looked at me with an expression that took a moment to decipher. "Such a beautiful body…save for those things on your face that could only be the mark of the devil."

Huh? What the fuck is he blabbing about?

"I would happily skin it off for you, but Sasuke-sama would not be pleased."

_That name! That goddamn name! Sa…su…ke…sama. That…!_

My body gave an involuntary jolt in reaction as that face, I had once considered beautiful, came back to haunt me. It immediately brought back the memories of that so-called 'inspection' where that jerk had gone about dishing out 'Gudan' sentences like he was desperate to meet some quota or he wouldn't get an extra raise in his paycheck. He hadn't even listened to that other man read out my sentence before he was calling out 'Gudan' for me like I really deserved it. Okay, so yes, I killed a man, but Jesus! Didn't self-defense account for anything? And the way he had spoken to me like I was some cockroach he wanted to stomp on. Grrrrr! I swear if I see him again, he had better pray he's not all alone because I'll rip his fucking guts out and hang them up to dry…

"Oooh? What's this?" Fat Slob jeered as he tipped my chin with the handle of his whip. I could see it wasn't the one with the steel tips today. Thank God. "You look positively furious. Hardly the expression I wanted to see. Still, you refuse to be broken, eh, Sinner? Well, I'll change that."

He took a step back, and hardly giving me time to collect myself, swung as hard as he could so that the whip found its target across my chest and right ribs. I gasped and jerked in response; but stubbornly bit my lip and refused to cry out.

"Renounce your heathen ways, Sinner!"

Another lash; this time around my shoulders and upper back.

"Those scars on your face tell of your birth from the devil! You spawn of evil! Your blackened soul will be purified!"

Another lash – same location. _Fuck!_ My toes curled, and I hung my head in an effort to focus on something else. Anything else…anyone else…Saku…

_Sasuke._

Yes. **Him**. The asshole that sentenced me to this fate. I would train all my hate into that smug face.

**WHAM!**

I would think of ways to exact my revenge; to make him suffer…to make ALL of them suffer for what they were doing to me.

**WHAM!**

He was probably enjoying himself in his cozy little mansion; not having a care for us 'sinners'.

**WHAM!**

Probably licking his chops and tallying in the number of people he has sentenced today. Probably glad he's about to get some kind of promotion or something.

**WHAM!**

_Shit!Shit!Shit!Shit!_

I could feel myself blacking out again, but at the same time, I could feel something else rising within me. Something thick, heavy, and suffocating in its intensity. If 'hate' could be a mass -a physical thing to behold - then that was it. It was this 'hate' that made the lashes become numb. It was this 'hate' that had me feeling an odd sense of calm. I realized then that I wanted to survive after all; that if there was some way I could manage to escape Gudan, I would return in some form or fashion to kill each and everyone one of these fuckers slowly…and with pleasure.

_This isn't like you, Naruto,_ a tiny voice whispered. _This isn't like you at all…what's happening to you?_

Fat Slob had stopped with the flogging and was now standing before me; panting and out of breath. He looked perturbed and even more pissed off. I wasn't cooperating with him, was I? This wasn't the way the script was supposed to go.

"You heathen," he hissed beneath his breath.

I felt my lips parting before I could control them as well as the grin forming on my face. "Fuck…you…too…" I panted, and collecting as much blood and saliva as I could muster in my mouth, I hurled it – with sick delight – in his direction. I watched with amusement as my spit hit the target – squarely on his right eye. I gotta confess, it was disgusting to see, but felt too damn good not to enjoy my moment of mini-victory.

Needless to say, Fat Slob did not really enjoy the same sentiment. He seemed rooted to the spot for a long minute, as if unsure of just what had happened. I watched the saliva run down his eye and down to his cheek, before he lifted a finger to wipe it away…examine it as if seeing an oddity…and then…

_Eeew._

Sticking it within his mouth to lick it off. In fact, he licked off the entire thing, and though his features were red-faced with fury, his smile spoke otherwise.

I was a dead man.

"They said I couldn't ruin your body too much, but they didn't say I couldn't break you in other ways."

What now?

"Do your worst," I dared him all the same, while bracing myself for him either breaking my legs or finishing off my arms or…whatever else.

I watched him walk away – all folds of fat and flesh; listened to him rummaging for something in the background, while muttering (probably curses) beneath his breath. I closed my eyes and hoped that whatever it was, I could bear it. I still had many things to do…such as burning this fucking place to the ground and then killing that Sasuke and everyone connected to him, but until then…I _had_ to _live_…I had to survive…I had to…

"AAAAAHHH!"

Who screamed? Me? Is that my voice? Do I really sound that afraid and in pain? And yet as that bastard's laughter intermingled with my sudden bellow of fury and disbelief, it was only to mask what was currently happening to me.

Of all the worst things he could do…he had to…he had to…

"FUCK!"

_Breathe, Naruto. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe._

The pain was excruciating, and I literally felt as if I was being ripped in half. I had no idea what he was sticking up my anus, but whatever it was…no human should have to suffer through something like that.

"I knew this would get you singing to the heavens," the slob breathed with a noisy lick of his lips.

_Make it stop. Please make it stop_, my mind screamed in desperation. _I am a sinner! I am a sinner, goddamnit! Please…make it stoooop! _

I was this close to actually begging him out loud, when his next words and actions had me frozen with terror.

"This is only the beginning, my dear Sinner," came the whispered words as the sensation of those sweaty, large palms, caressing my ass cheeks before moving to my balls to squeeze them none-too-gently, had me shuddering in revulsion. "By the time I'm through with you, you'll wish you'd never been born."

And with one final twist and shove, of whatever instrument he was using, deep within me, my body eventually gave up the fight to remain in the present.

I sank and welcomed the sudden darkness that washed over me; in which I desperately sought to find the last strands of my sanity.

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke:<em>

_Death_.

It is but a natural occurrence for we all must go through that process eventually.

However, the Great Book states that death is not the end of life, but merely the end of the body we inhibit in life. The spirit remains to seek out a need for attachment to a new body and new life. Where this spirit will be reborn is as a result of their past life and the accumulation of positive and negative action, including the resultant Karma due to one's past actions.

With such haunting words, I had to wonder if I would even _return_ in the next life. Did I even _want_ to return in a next life?

With an inner sigh, I reached for the small bucket of holy water and dipped the scoop into it. With a muttered prayer beneath my breath, I washed the graves of my family in a ritual so familiar now, I almost did it without thinking.

_Mother…Father…Brother…have my actions made my spirit so unworthy to be returned to the next life to be with you again?_

The polished grave stones seemed to have an ethereal glow around them beneath the cold sunlight. It was one of those days when the heavens couldn't quite make up its mind whether it wanted to rain or break into sunshine; a typical November morning here in the mountains. From this vantage point, one could see Byaku-Shinkyou several miles below. With its high fence enclosing the extensive grounds, it looked distant…closed off from the rest of the world; totally isolated from anything and anyone it seemed. You could see the town and farmlands just across the river – which wasn't that far of a walk once you left Byaku. And though modern roads marred the landscape, it still retained its raw, natural beauty which had been untouched for centuries.

Orochimaru had given me the option of having my parents buried somewhere in Byaku-Shinkyou, however, I declined the offer. I really had no idea why, considering I was too young to really make any real decisions, but for some reason, I felt their souls would never be at rest if they were buried in the same place their lives had been taken. I wanted them to find their peace in the next life, and it was eventually the suggestion of one of the remaining older members of my clan, to have their stones placed in this picturesque setting. It was fitting after all. They could continue to watch over us from here…

_But do they like what they see, Sasuke? Do they like what Byaku-Shinkyou has become over the years? Do they like what **you** have become over the years?_

I did what I had to do, I argued fiercely within myself. I am only doing what I have to do, Father. But don't worry…one day I will take back what rightfully belongs to the Uchiha. I swear on your gravestones.

With a final bow to them and to the silent priest who watched over the graves from his hamlet not far from here, I finally began to make my way down the narrow, winding path to a waiting Haku. For inexplicable reasons, he had insisted on following me today for my patrol, and though it wasn't really necessary for him to do so, I hadn't been in the mood to argue with him to remain behind.

Besides, he's been looking pretty somber in the past two days or so…and I was more than aware I was the cause of it.

_Sigh._

"How long do you plan on moping around me?" I asked as I walked past him, and he immediately followed like a shadow.

His sullen silence was more than enough of an answer.

"Do you expect me to apologize?" I queried with a glance over my shoulder. His gaze was trained to the ground, and it looked like he was close to crying. Just what I didn't need.

"How was I supposed to know he was going to die?" I snapped irritably. Walking down a hill could be pretty damn treacherous, and I nearly lost my footing. Guess I should have worn boots instead of my slippers and socks. Damn it all to hell and back. This was not helping my temper in the slightest. I should probably send him back to the compound, if he was going to be such a goddamn baby about this.

"Death is inevitable," I lectured with a scowl on my face. Who was I trying to convince? Him or myself? "He was insubordinate and deserved his punishment. You were witness to his behavior."

Still nothing.

I growled beneath my breath and decided it wasn't worth it. Haku could be a downright petulant child when it came to some things. However, I was still perturbed by the whole thing. Receiving the news about Momichi Zabuza's death had actually…shocked me. It was an emotion I hadn't expected, considering deaths were not uncommon around Byaku-Shinkyou. Still, it was jarring to think of the healthy, young man who had just about cursed me out in my office, barely a week ago, no longer in existence.

_As soon as I get back, those torturers are going to have to answer to me. Goddamnit! They really should take things easy!_

I stole a glance at Haku, wondering if telling him that would help to ease his troubles. He must have really cared for that bastard, and I hated the fact that I was feeling a little sorry for him.

"Listen…Haku…" I began, when suddenly –

He _moved._

At first, I assumed he was about to attack me, and my hand automatically went to my katana to counter his actions, when I heard the undeniable _chink_ of something wheezing past me before it lodged itself into the bark of the tree behind us. A quick glance showed it was a three-pronged dagger, and it was clear that Haku had deflected it with one of the throwing knives he kept hidden within his kimono. His body was as tense as a bowstring while he shielded me; those dark eyes no longer looking miserable, but alert and watchful. He seemed to be looking at something on his right, and before I could give an order, he whipped out two smaller knives, from within his robes, to throw them with pinpoint accuracy towards the cluster of bushes in that direction.

The low grunt of pain we heard was more than enough to tell us we had caught the attacker. Haku dashed quickly to see who it was, though he was still careful enough to hold onto another knife in case of another ambush.

I would have gone after him if I hadn't noticed that the three-pronged dagger had something wrapped around it. It took a while to dislodge the damn thing from the tree, but I finally managed to yank it out with a loud grunt of impatience. The craftsmanship of the dagger was excellent, but clearly not made in these parts. It looked like a Chinese blade and as I unwrapped the paper rolled around its handle, my theory was confirmed at the insignia engraved around it.

_A foreigner?_

"Who is it?" I asked Haku as I walked closer to where he was now on his haunches beside the prone body of a figure I did not recognize.

Haku withdrew his knives – which had been lodged in the man's chest and throat – before peeling off the dead man's face mask. He shook his head slowly in bemusement.

"I've never seen him before, my Lord, but he does look…"

"Chinese," I muttered beneath my breath and unrolled the piece of paper to read its contents.

"Beware the enemies that lurk in the dark," I translated quietly; feeling something cold and slimy crawl beneath my skin as my heart beat quickened with what I hoped was not fear.

Haku made a sudden movement, and assuming we were about to be attacked again –

(Good grief! I was so damn tense!)

…I realized he was only rising to his feet; though there was an expression of concern and still that guarded alertness on his visage.

"May I suggest we go back home, my Lord?" Haku suggested quietly. "We can do the patrol another day."

"I think not," I replied with a firm shake of my head, while slipping both dagger and note within my _kamishimo_. I was not about to let a couple of common thugs rearrange my plans for the day. Hiding within Byaku-Shinkyou would only make them bolder. I had to show that I was not afraid of whatever plans they had in store for me.

_/Beware the enemies that lurk in the dark/_

Just what the fuck did that mean anyway? I knew we weren't exactly liked by everyone, and I would have been a fool to assume that I did not have my enemies out there because of my line of work. It was also not the first time I had to deal with random attacks. During patrols of the town in the past, I've had one or two unruly idiots who had a thing against the watchdogs and had tried to stab or shoot me, so this was nothing new.

"But my Lord…"

"Haku."

"Yes, Sasuke-sama?"

"Go back to the compound if you're so concerned about me…"

"No, my Lord," came the immediate and almost vehement response. "I will stay with you."

I stopped walking and looked over my shoulder and at him carefully. "Are you sure? I do not need you complaining and whining about every little thing. I've had such attacks happen before, so it's no real surprise."

He looked unsure about my explanation, but nodded softly anyway. I had a feeling he wanted to tell me something else, but wasn't quite sure of how to say it. Probably to try to convince me to go back to home. However, he said nothing else and simply continued to walk behind me seemingly lost in his thoughts. Either way, the atmosphere had changed drastically. Instead of feeling relatively relaxed as we made our way across the bridge and towards the town, the tension was still there. Everyone and everything now seemed more sinister, and I had to be more on guard than ever before.

Usually a trip to Kanei was a time for me to reacquaint myself with civilization again. Though most of the townsfolk rarely spoke to me, except to greet or bow in acknowledgement, it was still good to see 'others' besides the usual faces in Byaku. It was one of the many things I missed about my home of old. Now, thanks to Orochimaru's rules, getting to hear the sound of children's laughter or experience the comforting presence of a woman was no longer feasible. Though I was never really an outgoing child, my brother more than made up for my 'quietness'. We'd walk through the hamlet on some evenings, stopping by neighbors' homes to wish them well or engage in conversation. I would remember evenings sitting on the doorsteps of some uncle or auntie's house (not really related per se but we called everyone uncle or auntie), munching on hot roasted potatoes and drinking sweet cider, or running home after classes at Old Man Kamakura's while waving at familiar faces of families I recognized. The end of the day meant resting my head on my mother's lap as we sat on the patio of our home, where she'd stroke my hair gently and hum some song beneath her breath, while father and my brother would probably be on their way to the administrative offices to go over some final paperwork.

These days, I realized I only tortured myself whenever I'd linger in front of a market stall; pretending to want to purchase something, though I really was observing my surroundings with a deep-seeded hunger for a past I could never reclaim. The sight of a mother admonishing her children or hanging up the laundry or even doing something as simple as dozing off beneath the sun, would evoke those memories I tried to suppress often. Perhaps a part of me would have loved to have any of these families look at me in the same way they used to in the past, but unfortunately, things had changed; the times had changed. Finding a genuine kind gaze was a rarity as only respect (sometimes grudging) and fear had replaced them.

It was not surprising that Kanei had a very low crime rate if any, after all most of its inhabitants were mostly purified sinners who had spent quite some time in Byaku-Shinkyou and wouldn't be foolish enough to do anything else to get them back in there. The lone police station was almost always empty – it's holding cells that is – and as I made my way into the cool confines of the building, it was all I could do not to roll my eyes as the chit-chatting officers on duty, rose to attention immediately they noticed me walk in. One of them had gotten up so fast, he tipped his chair over and the other almost choked on the food he had been munching on.

"Good afternoon, sir!" they greeted in unison.

"At ease," I ordered curtly, which was about as effective as asking them to start singing. They had at least stopped saluting, but were still standing as stiff as ramrods. Knowing it was pointless to repeat myself, I moved on.

"Is Captain Kurobachi around?"

"Yes, sir! He is in his office, sir!"

"Someone called?" came the sudden bellow that was followed by the towering figure of the very man I was looking for. Kurobachi was a monster of a man. He was easily over six feet tall, and had the frame of a body-builder. His no-nonsense attitude had been infamous while within the walls of Byaku-Shinkyou, which was no real surprise considering he was the mentor to several officers including the deceased Momichi Zabuza. My feelings towards Kurobachi were mixed to say the least. I respected his skills as an officer and fighter, but otherwise…

"Ah, the young master is here to see me," he thundered in that voice of his that didn't seem to have a reduced volume level. "I am not in trouble, am I?"

His guffaw was accompanied by uneasy smiles from his subordinates and an irritated frown from me. I was not in the mood for his antics. I had to get to the bottom of this mysterious note and my attacker.

"There is a dead man lying within the bushes of Genbu Hill. Thirty-eight N. Thirty E."

Well that stopped him laughing at least. I watched his expression quickly change to a frown of concentration. Good. I now had his attention.

"He tried to kill me," I continued. "Have your men dispose of his body quickly. In the meantime, I will need to speak to you privately."

Kurobachi grunted with a curt nod toward the other two officers. "Zaku. Kin, get going and take two others with you. I want increased security around the perimeter."

"Yes, sir!"

We watch them scurry out in haste; and I had the feeling they were glad to be doing something of importance again. Things had been slow around here lately.

"Come on in," Kurobachi invited; having to stoop a little, so he wouldn't hit his head on the alcove leading into his office. Motioning for Haku to wait outside for me, I walked past the captain and waited for him to shut the door behind us before settling into the chair across his desk. The room wasn't all that big, and his bulk only seemed to shrink it further. His light grunt, as he settled into the brown leather chair, was quickly followed with his muscular arms hitting the top of the document-cluttered desk. He leaned forward with acute interest.

"Want to tell me what all this is about?"

I reached into my _kamishimo_ to pull out the dagger and note which I tossed onto the desk between us. He raised a brow, eyed me for a long minute, before reaching out to examine the items. He read the note beneath his breath and shook his head slowly.

"Chinese mafia, maybe?"

"Possibly," I replied carefully. "I just didn't think they'd dare to make their way up here."

"Hn."

"Do you think the Bakufu have anything to do with it?"

"Wouldn't surprise me. Those bastards have their hands on everything." He paused and then glanced at me warily. "Why you though? Gotten your hands mixed up with them?"

"Don't be ridiculous," I all but snapped. "What in the world would I want to get mixed up with the Chinese mafia for?"

"Did you arrest anyone recently…?"

I shook my head. "No…at least not me. Perhaps another watchdog group did. All the same." I stabbed the note with a finger. "This is a warning to me, and I want you to do something about it."

Kurobachi leaned back in his chair and tapped the dagger against the desk; brows furrowed in thought. "I'll have a patrol out to see if we've received any influx of newcomers into the town lately. My guess is they'll probably be in the RLD; those mafia guys like to hang out there a lot."

"Whatever you do, make sure its discreet," I insisted firmly. "The last thing we want is to have them swarming around here and causing trouble."

"You betcha."

I rose to my feet in readiness to leave, when something else occurred to me. "One more thing…"

"What's that?"

"When and if you get anything, direct the information straight to me."

"Huh?" He raised a brow in bemusement. "Don't we usually…"

"Not this time," I stated curtly; feeling my head and heart begin to thud with the enormity of what I was ordering him to do. Usually all such important information was sent directly to Orochimaru's office, but this time around, I wanted to be the one in charge. I felt that this was my 'problem' and I was going to deal with it in my own way. "Haku will be the intermediary. Deliver all messages or phone calls to him. Is that clear?"

"…sure."

"I'm dead serious, Kurobachi. This is a situation that must not be disclosed to anyone but you and me."

He raised his arms as if surrendering. "Whatever you say, young master. Oh…before I forget. Sarutobi called in earlier and was asking about you."

_Asuma?_ What the hell did he want?

"I told him you hadn't arrived yet." Kurobachi pointed to the black phone on his desk. "Might wanna call to him to find out what's up." He rose to his feet and gave a curt bow. "I'll leave you alone. Gotta go get my men organized for some arrests tonight."

I waited until he was out of the room before dialing the number to Asuma's office. Though it was close to lunch time, I sincerely hoped he was still around and –

"Sarutobi here," came the familiar gruff voice. He sounded busy.

"Asuma? It's Sasuke."

"Ah, the son-of-a-bitch I've been looking for all this time. Goddamn it."

"And a good afternoon to you too."

He snorted and expelled a breath of exasperation. "I have an order from you here, young man."

An order? What…ooh. _That_ order.

"Yes? So?" I picked up the note Kurobachi had left behind and tucked it back into my uniform. I noticed he had taken the dagger with him.

"It hasn't got your goddamn signature on it!" Asuma all but roared at me. "You know how irritating these officers can be about protocol, and how much shit they'll give me if I tell them that you actually authorized his release but without your signature, they do not consider it official and…"

I swear Asuma must have been one hell of a nagging wife in his previous life. I waited until he was done with his tirade; though my attention was trained on the numerous photographs on the shelves and walls. Kurobachi was definitely a popular guy. I sneered at the picture of he shaking Orochimaru's hand while receiving his promotion to Captain.

"If you're finished," I finally spoke when he stopped long enough to catch his breath. "You can transfer me to Officer Touya. I will speak to him about your precious document."

He growled. "You are lucky I'm not near you, or I'd put you over my knee and -"

"Know your place, Asuma."

"Fuck you too, Captain. Hold on and don't hang up!"

I tried to hide my smile at the insult, but to be honest (I sank into Kurobachi's chair), talking to Asuma was a reminder of my impulsive decision to release a few of the sinners. One of whom would be that blue-eyed heathen called Uzumaki Naruto.

_And I still remember his damn name._

I rubbed my forehead wearily. I usually tried not to keep the names of sinners imprinted in my memory (though there were quite a few of them not easily forgotten). All the same, I was thankful that my dreams had resorted back to being empty journeys through nothingness; though I must confess that hearing about Zabuza's death had resulted in a particularly worrisome nightmare. I think he had tried to chew me to death with those teeth of his -

"Officer Touya here," came the sudden breathless voice at the other end of the line. I jerked myself out of my thoughts and focused long enough on giving him instructions about making sure my orders were carried out. In my rush, I had forgotten to sign the release decree, but basically it was to let him know that Asuma had the authority to see to the sinners' 'freedom' effective immediately.

"Happy now?" I asked when Asuma was back on the line.

"Ecstatic," he replied with as much sarcasm as he could muster into the word. I contemplated telling him about my harrowing experience earlier, but figured it could wait for another day.

Kurobachi stuck in his head with a single knock at the door. He held up a bento with a raised brow; a silent invitation for lunch with him. I was ready to shake my head in refusal; insisting I would eat back in Byaku-Shinkyou, but my stomach apparently had other plans. The sudden growl had my cheeks flaring with color, and Kurobachi's grin wasn't helping either. I think this town has made him too soft. The Kurobachi of old would have never bothered (or dared) do something like this.

"Gotta go," I grumbled to Asuma. "I'm going to get lunch."

"Buying something from Ichiraku again?"

"No…Kurobachi's planning to poison me with his food."

Asuma burst into hearty laughter, and I managed a weak smile before hanging up the device and motioning for the older man to enter. As he happily opened the large black-lacquered box with its array of several rice, fish, and meat delicacies (he was happy to brag that his wife of two years had made this for him), I swallowed the thick lump that came to my throat at the sudden rush of pain-filled memories.

I had narrowly escaped death today, and yet the simple act of having lunch with someone was exposing a side of me I did not want to reveal.

'_tosan…'kasan…nii-chan…_

Sometimes…it really was the _little_ things that made all the difference.

* * *

><p><em>Shikamaru<em>

With Asuma's instructions burning a hole into his brain, as well as the scroll tucked within his kimono, Shikamaru followed the guards towards the East Block with a dull feeling of trepidation and uncertainty.

He knew what was required of him, and yet he had to keep wondering _why_ he was even agreeing to this in the first place.

It was no surprise that he had been given the task of releasing Naruto. Most of the officers trusted him, and many had even tried to talk him into becoming a watchdog someday– a concept that made him shudder with revulsion at the very idea of working in such a place. _No way in fucking hell._ You couldn't pay him enough to remain here once his time was up. He still had his plans to marry his woman and to live a quiet and uncomplicated life somewhere far away from this cesspool of hypocrisy.

And this cesspool couldn't be more emphasized than what he was walking into.

From the outside, you were only greeted with a small townhouse – in which the officers or guards on duties resided – and you could never believe that behind it was the underground route to a section of Byaku-Shinkyou that never made the news or papers.

Sighing inwardly, he braced himself for the familiar stench of 'The EB' – as many of the sinners called it – to assail his senses. He gave wan smiles through the process of identifying himself and suffering through the heavy gates and locks being undone before they were ushered into the cold cravens.

Shikamaru was more than aware that he was extremely lucky not to have made it to this place. He could still remember his day for inspection, and standing in that intimidating compound as Lord Sasuke went down the row of sinners dishing out his judgment. When the first captain – who was no older than he was – had stood before him, Shikamaru had felt something he still wasn't sure he could describe in words to this day. It wasn't fear per se, but something else…like a reluctant jolt of awe at the determination and intensity within those dark eyes.

He had heard the sinners (and even some guards) tell a thousand stories about the young captain, over the years, but Shikamaru did not put too much stock in most of them. He wouldn't say he liked the guy, because anyone who could be that ruthless and cold-hearted, did not deserve his respect to be honest. Still, he had to admire a guy who could turn out to be this way considering his family history. He doubted the original owners of this place had planned to turn their police headquarters into a miniature version of hell. In fact, Shikamaru doubted the concept of Gudan had even been in their vocabulary, which could only mean that Lord Orochimaru had instilled the ridiculous rites of purification as his means to brainwash everyone.

_Go figure._

The guards made him stop on the first level; which was a good thing because his stomach was already beginning to churn with disgust as the dull metallic smell of blood – from the levels below – filled his nostrils. It was all he could do not to cover his nose, and it amazed him how the guards and officers could walk, talk, and laugh as if there was nothing amiss. Why should it? They were probably used to this dump.

Officer Fudo – a small man with beady black eyes – was walking up the stone steps which led to the lower levels; with a scowl on his features. At the sight of Shikamaru waiting, he gave a grunt of acknowledgement and stretched out a hand. Guessing he must have been expecting this already, Shikamaru withdrew the scroll to place it within the waiting palm.

Fudo – hardly skipping a beat – unrolled the scroll; scanned through it quickly, rolled it back up, slipped it into his _kamishimo_, before barking out an order.

"Take him to Cell K103!"

_Jesus!_ For a small guy, he did have a booming voice. Guess it was useful when working in this place.

Shikamaru thanked him – and got nothing but another grunt in return before the older man was already on his way to the next victim. Biting his lower lip, he shuffled after the two guards as they made their way down the haunting corridor. Unlike the other dungeons, in the West Block, these seemed more like catacombs…freakin' tombs to house the dead…which wasn't too far from the truth considering most of the poor bastards in here were sentenced for death anyway. Moans of agonies came from within some of them, while others remained dark and silent which was the worst as Shikamaru could feel the weight of their hateful gazes trained on him.

_Hate…everywhere…death…everywhere…you can feel it…eating at you…sucking the life out of you…_

He shivered as they made another turn (it was so damn easy to get lost in this place without guidance), and just when he thought their journey would never end, the guards finally came to a stop before one such catacomb that was no different from the rest. All the same, it was damn hard to see anyone inside, and they had to hold up the lanterns to illuminate a sight that had the normally poker-faced young man to gasp in dismay.

_Naruto…holy hell…what did they do to you?_

The blond was naked; save for the tiny piece of cloth that barely covered his groin area. His once smooth, pale skin was covered with streaks of blood and angry welts; the kind where just looking at them alone could tell you how painful the whipping must have been. There was a tin pan with an untouched rice ball still sitting on it along with a small tin cup of water. The _drip, drip_ sound seemed to be coming from a leak from the roof of the cave, but Shikamaru was aware that all of that was a distraction to the man he had come to see.

Naruto – looking skinnier than the last time - sat with a knee raised to his chest, while his other leg was still outstretched. His arms were wrapped around the raised knee, but it was his face…his _expression_…that sent a sliver of fear racing down Shikamaru's spine.

Gone was the happy (well relatively happy) go-lucky guy he had met almost two weeks ago. In its place was a _beast_. The blond hair looked shaggy and wild around his face; almost giving one the impression of a lion's mane. Perhaps it was the scars on his cheeks that made the comparison more applicable...and _those eyes_…those eyes that had once been the brightest of blues and filled with curiosity, now looked…reddened and filled with an emotion that was a combination of emptiness and yes…_hate_.

Pure, unadulterated _hate_. Loathing. Disdain. _Simmering_ _fury_.

Shikamaru shuddered as Asuma's words came back to haunt him.

_That's right. He's a descendent of the Senju; one of the most feared clans of all time. Diluted or not, this guy…the way he looks like right now…he could rip my fucking head off and not feel a bit of remorse._

Shikamaru nearly jumped out of his skin at the sudden clanging sound of the steel locks to the dungeon being opened, and he was unaware of holding his breath as the second guard held out his _bokken_…just in case. Shikamaru was also quick to notice that the guards had special whips with steel tips attached to their togas. If Naruto was to do anything stupid…

"Stand back," one of the guards said firmly. "He's likely to cause trouble."

"It's all right," Shikamaru said quietly as he tried to get between the guards. He could feel his heart in his throat, but he knew he had to do this. "I'll get him out myself."

The guards looked at each other and then shrugged as if saying "your funeral" before stepping aside and letting Shikamaru further into the cell.

"Naruto?" he called out gently, and for his efforts, was rewarded with a downtown of the blond's lips before they peeled back to reveal an ugly sneer.

"You're being released, Naruto," Shikamaru continued. "I've come to take you out of here."

Shikamaru couldn't be sure, but he felt he saw something 'human' flicker within those blue eyes for a heartbeat before they were replaced with that empty expression again.

"Will you come with me, Naruto?"

Shikamaru took another step closer; feeling his heart stir when Naruto appeared to want to shrink back into the shadows.

"It's okay," Shikamaru was saying softly as if hoping to appease a child. "It's going to be ok…**urgh**!"

When asked to describe it later, he would compare it to being hit with a sack of bricks from out of nowhere. The wind was literally knocked out of his sails, and as he felt himself thrown to the ground and his windpipe suddenly blocked by hands that felt as strong as steel, Shikamaru struggled to come to terms that he might either die in the next few seconds, or have to think really fast to save his life.

_What a fast, motherfucker, and he looked so damn innocent too!_

He could barely hear the guards shouting and ordering Naruto to get off him, and even as they began to hit him with their whips and bokken, Naruto would _not_ let go. There was an animalistic, primal glow in those eyes…in his snarl as he bared his teeth as if eager to bite…in his general temperament. His body was probably so used to the punishment that none of the blows from the guards meant a thing to him. His focus was on Shikamaru, and that focus and intent was to simply _kill_ – to inflict the same kind of torture he had gone through on someone else.

_I understand, Naruto,_ Shikamaru spoke with his eyes, which were getting blurry as the world began to shiver. _I understand your pain. I do._

He felt something hot and wet descend on his forehead and cheeks, and assuming the ceiling was leaking again, it took him a second longer to realize that the drops of liquid were actually…

_Naruto…you…_

…**tears.**

Tears of frustrated fury that had filled the blond's eyes and were cascading down his cheeks and into his mouth silently though he never cried out with pain at the blows he was still receiving. The grip around Shikamaru's neck was slowly weakening, and those blue eyes now seemed a little more human and filled with remorse and shock at what he was doing.

"You heathen! Release him!" one of the guard bellowed angrily and with a particularly vicious blow to Naruto's ribs, it was the final straw to send the blond collapsing into unconsciousness on Shikamaru's prone form.

"Good God," one of the guards panted. "What is he made of? Iron?"

_You fuckers,_ Shikamaru thought with irritation, though his eyes, throat and lungs felt like they were on fire. He kept trying to cough, but even that act was too painful to achieve. He watched them drag Naruto's comatose body aside as he struggled to get to his feet; reaching out to hold the side of the cave to catch his breath.

"Son-of-a-bitch," another of the guard was growling with a hard kick to Naruto's side. "You almost broke my fucking arm! I could fucking ki -"

He stopped at the firm hand gripping his wrist, for he had been ready to hit Naruto again with his _bokken_. The guard was ready to open his mouth to protest, but he saw the flicker of anger in Shikamaru's eyes and knew it wasn't going to be a good idea.

"Don't touch him again…either of you," Shikamaru rasped painfully. He released the guard's wrist with a final hard squeeze – hoping he had broken a bone or two – before stooping to his haunches beside Naruto.

_I'm sorry,_ he thought sadly as he took in the striped shoulder, back and buttocks of the blond. _I'm so fucking sorry, man. No one deserves this shit. No one._

With a light grunt, he began to heave Naruto's body over his shoulder; much to the guards' surprise as they had assumed they'd be the ones doing it. Once Shikamaru had the other boy safely in a fireman's lift, he began to walk out of the cave slowly, ignoring the guards who made way for him without saying another word.

He had no idea what being a bodyguard entailed or what Asuma _really_ wanted him to do, all Shikamaru knew was that he was somehow now responsible for this kid…literally his new burden. For now, he would simply watch and protect Naruto as best he could…for as long as he could…until the time came for his final purification rite on this earth.


	7. 07: Collision

**Notes:** My sincere thanks again for your fantastic feedback! I really do appreciate it. Enjoy! :D

**P.S:** Maybe someone can tell me how to indent things to the right on this site. :( This is really messing up my formatting, but hopefully it doesn't deter you from the reading.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 07: <strong>

**Collision **

_The troubled waters  
>are frozen fast.<br>Under clear heaven  
>moonlight and shadow<br>ebb and flow._

_- Murasaki Shikibu_

* * *

><p>Voices drifted in and out of my consciousness like gentle tidal waves with its constant ebb and flow. They made little to no sense to me; those snatches of conversation, but at least they let me know that I was still alive…still breathing…still <em>existing<em>…barely…

"…looks half-dead…"

"…why bother? Just let him die…"

"…no one come in here, damn it…"

"…not a hotel! He's one of us…!"

"…get out of here!"

I was burning with a fever that seemed to emanate from deep within my bones. It was like being dipped into a roaring furnace and, every now and then, wrenched back to reality with the sensation of something cool and soothing against my flesh. Those didn't always work though, for the fever would return with a vengeance soon after. Tongue heavy, mouth dry…Hell really was a terrible place, and I was sure the Devil was having his way dancing all over me and laughing in delight at my suffering -

"…still running a fever…"

"…gave him the medication as I instructed?"

"…all of them…"

"Pfft. Don't understand why you're still bothering with him…"

"…can't just let him die…"

"He's just about dead anyway."

"You're a fucking doctor, aren't you?"

"You watch how you speak to me, you bastard. I didn't have to come down here, you know."

"…my apologies…"

_Sigh._ "…these twice a day…apply these ones on the wounds…not guaranteeing it makes a difference…"

"…thanks…"

"…slows down his eventual death anyway…"

"Why do you have to be so damn negative? Some doctor you are…"

"This is the last time I wander into this cesspool of sin…!"

The voices kept rising; like a married couple, grasping at straws, with no solution in sight. Ah, arguing about somebody who's dying, eh? Poor sap. It couldn't possibly be me. I was still here…still alive…still breathing…still _existing_…barely…

"…take it easy…not a sack of potatoes…"

"…nearly two weeks…the guy's gatta wake up some time…"

"…went through a lot more than you did…"

"So what? Why's he getting special treatment?"

"…"

"See? Even you can't answer that…!"

"Some people…are…"

"Whatever. I ain't sharing my space with him…"

"Jesus! Have a fucking heart!"

"No way! What's he got that I ain't…"

"He is scheduled for Gudan."

"…"

"…"

"…maybe he's better off dying now…"

"Would be the best thing…"

"Don't talk like that…"

_Gudan._

That lone word sparked something deep within me; a feeling so intense it felt as if I had been slammed into a brick wall.

_Gudan. Gudan. Gudan._

The monotonous chant by disembodied voices had me struggling to breathe. I felt trapped all of a sudden; felt as if an elephant was sitting on my chest and wouldn't allow me to take in the air I so desperately needed. I was in a claustrophobic cage with its walls closely in on me rapidly, when suddenly…from the darkness above…_that_ face appeared; _that_ bald-headed, greasy, smelly fat-ass who…who…

"!"

"Whoa!"

"Hold him down! Hold him down goddamnit!"

"What the fuck is wrong with him?"

"I don't know…just hold him steady!"

"What's that…?"

"A shot…Kabuto said to give it to him when he gets like this…"

"OW! Holy shit! My eye! Bastard kicked me in the eye!"

"Grab his legs too!"

My eyes were open, but I could not see. I was still in that damn cage, begging, pleading, desperate to be released. I felt the hands upon me – so many of them - and I cringed in revulsion and dread. To me they all _felt_ like the slimy hands of that fat slob. They all _smelled_ like _him_. They were all miniature versions of _him_. They were all going to do _that thing_ again and again and again and again until…until…

"Fuck! My nooobse! He brode mah nobse!"

"Goddamnit, Naruto! Calm the fuck down!"

"Man, he's so fucking strong!"

"Hold him down…I got it. I got it…here we go…!"

I barely felt the tiny prick of the needle being jabbed into my upper thigh, but the effect was immediate all the same. The sudden claustrophobic/panic attack was slowly being replaced by a languid stupor that had my lashes growing heavier with each passing second. I welcomed the fog that clouded my vision and my mind, and before long, I was pleasantly numb all over…numb but still alive…still breathing…still _existing_…barely…

* * *

><p>"You're late, little brother."<p>

I looked up with surprise; having to blink rapidly to be sure I wasn't see things, but no…he was still here in the flesh with hardly a blemish on his body. He pulled out his gold lighter and cupping his fingers around the flame, lit the cigarette which had been dangling from the corner of his mouth.

_Always so cool…even in death…_

"Don't just stand there like a goddamn idiot, Fox Boy. Come closer."

_This is a dream…_

I assumed it was a dream, but if it was, it felt too damn real. I could feel the night air nipping at my skin, could smell the salt water from the sea marred only by the ships and boats anchored by the piers. The docks were busy tonight with new shipments coming in and fishermen hauling in their catches of the day. I rubbed my nose and sniffled before sitting beside him on an overturned wooden crate, and together we watched the night lights dance over the gentle waters in companionable silence.

_Nothing but a dream… _

"So…" He finally asked after what seemed like an eternity. "How's that girlfriend of yours?"

I stole a glance at him with a horrified expression, wondering if he was fucking around with me. I expected to see him smirking, but his gaze was still trained on the ships in the distance; his visage not giving anything away. Was he being serious? Had he forgotten that he shot her in cold blood? What kind of game was he trying to play here? Feeling my anger well up at the memory, I opened my mouth to remind him of exactly 'how she was doing', when my lips parted to form the words,

"She's doing great. She's still got the flu though, but she says she might be better this weekend. We're going to see that new movie that just came out…it should cheer her up."

_Huh?_ What? What was I talking about? Sakura was dead! _Dead!_ And yet here I was acting as if this was just another day in -

"She seems like a good girl," Kojima agreed with a playful wink in my direction.

"She _is_ a good girl," I insisted. "The best."

_And you took her away from me._

He chuckled and flicked some ash away; making sure they didn't fall on his white suit. "Whatever you say, Fox Boy."

"I hate when you call me that," I mumbled.

Fully expecting him to laugh and ruffle my hair as he always did, I found myself squirming a little in discomfort when he only gave me a long and thoughtful look.

"…really have no idea, do you?" he finally muttered with a light shake of his head.

"Have no idea about what?"

Without warning, he reached out to cup my chin hard, turning my face this way and that as if examining something. I didn't want to tell him that his grip was hurting me or that my neck felt like it was going to be ripped out soon, so I simply settled for swallowing tightly and hoping he wouldn't crack any bone by accident.

"Where did you say you were born again?" came the random question.

What the hell was this all about?

"Shikoku," I replied or tried to considering my neck was still being stretched.

"Shikoku…" he mumbled, and then thankfully released me as if discarding something suddenly revolting.

I coughed and rubbed my aching neck, wondering if I was going to be abused anymore tonight, but he was back to watching the ships with that same cryptic expression on his visage. A sudden gust of wind had me pulling the flaps of my jacket tighter around me. I wanted to go back to my apartment, but I had a feeling Kojima wasn't quite done with me yet.

"Ever wondered why I joined the syndicate, Naruto?" he eventually asked just as the loud blast of a ship's horn echoed around us.

"…to make money?" I suggested hopefully. Why else would anyone want to join such a thing in the first place?

"Even better. I wanted the fame, fortune, and the women."

"Ah." _Why else?_

He took a final drag of his cigarette before crushing it beneath his polished leather shoe. "I got the money and women part at least…not so much fame." He gave a bitter laugh and dug into his jacket for something…which would turn out to be his pistol; his treasured Beretta 92FS, which he had nicknamed 'Sugar'.

"Know how many men Sugar has made love to, Naruto?"

I shook my head. Did I even want to know? It looked like the same gun he had used on Sakura, and this knowledge made me sick to my stomach. I wanted to vomit, but I held it in and tried to even my breathing.

"Even I've lost count," he replied with a smirk. "Ya know…I figured that was the way it worked. The more you kill…the higher up you go…the more respect you got, but look at me…" He twirled the gun around a finger. "Joined when I was just out of high school…almost fifteen years later…whatta I got to show for it? I'm still a two-bit thug in their eyes." He spat and laughed bitterly.

Couldn't believe I was beginning to feel a little sorry for the guy. Maybe he should have tried another line of work.

"I killed my first man when I was ten years old," he revealed with a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. "Went into his bedroom…dug around in his dresser…found his Smith and Wesson and…pow!" He held out his arms with a finger on the trigger as if about to shoot at a passing fishing boat. "Walked into the bedroom where he was fucking my older sister and shot him between the eyes."

_Yikes._ "Your sister's boyfriend?"

"Nah…my old man."

I felt even sicker to my stomach. Maybe not so much at the idea of him killing his father, but that his father had been sleeping around with his…_older sister_? How disgusting was that?

"Sometimes you've gotta do what you've gotta do, Naruto. Sometimes…"

He reached out for my hand and slapped the gun on my palm as if trying to give me a gift of some sort. He forced me to wrap my fingers around the handle, and to my chagrin made me point it squarely at his forehead. Immediately, my fingers began to slack off as panic seized me. Though I had killed him once, in this moment, I felt as if I had never actually used a gun before. The weapon felt heavy and clumsy within my grip, and the knowledge that a bullet could go off at any minute and lodge itself within his brain, made my eyes water.

"…sometimes," Kojima whispered with a feverish intensity to match the expression in those black eyes. "You've gotta do what you've gotta do to survive, Naruto. Live by the gun...die by the gun."

"I don't…"

"All you have to do is pull the trigger, Fox Boy."

"I can't…" I begged in a pained whisper.

"Yes, you can. You have to, Naruto. It's in your blood!"

_No! I am not a killer! I **cannot** kill!_

"I will teach you how to become a killer…like you were born to be."

_No! No! No! No!_

I wanted this nightmare to stop. I wanted him to stop saying those words to me, and yet the more he spoke…

"…the blood of your ancestors…those who created us…made us what we are today…it will always be in you…"

…the more I felt it; that familiar calm that had come over me the moment I pulled the trigger in his apartment. It was that same icy, calculated motion that had made the gunshot to his heart hit with such pinpoint accuracy. Considering I had only had a day of lessons in that warehouse - and I only managed to make two decent shots out of all the bottles and cans he had laid out for me - it really was a miracle I killed him with a single bullet.

"Luck…" I moaned in misery. "That's all it was…pure luck."

But Kojima's grin widened to reveal those perfect white teeth now stained with thick globs of blood which slowly began to dribble down his chin.

"Luck? I think not," the new version of Kojima laughed in unbridled amusement. "You are, my dear Uzumaki Naruto, _a natural born killer_."

_It's about time you embraced it…_

* * *

><p><em>NO!<em>

My lashes flew open as I sat up with a loud gasp. I felt drenched; feverish yet cold as I struggled to make sense of my surroundings. The feeling of wetness came from my sweat dampening the plain gray yukata I was wearing, and the chill was from the open wooden windows beside and above me.

_Wait…what? Am I back in…ouch!_

My hands quickly moved to my left ribs to control the shot of pain that had raced up to my brain with the sudden movement. It was clear that my numbness was slowly easing away, and I was back to being plagued with aches and pains inflicted by my stay…_there._

Swallowing the bitter taste that rose to my mouth, I moved gingerly on the thin mattress to survey my surroundings. For one thing, I was no longer underground – thank God – and I had to admit sucking in breaths of the cool night air was wonderful compared to dealing with the musty, dank stench of rocks and stones. I was in a small room – well more like a closet space. There was nothing in here besides the mattress, the tatami mats and my window…and of course the screen door leading to whatever was out there.

Where was I exactly? Was this another step in the Gudan process? Were you allowed to stay in this closet until then? I had been made to believe that I was doomed to remain below ground until my time was up. So why was I here?

Things just weren't making any sense.

Debating between opening the door and peering out the window, I settled for looking out the window first…if I could move that is. My body was still in agony and the medication that someone had given me earlier had just about worn off. Biting my lower lip to control any sound I was likely to make, I rose to my knees – nearly fell with the intense wave of dizziness that overwhelmed me, paused, and counted to ten before trying again. I still had to steady myself against the wall, but with some effort, I finally managed to get high enough for my head to peek over the ledge warily.

_Hmm._

There was another town house directly across me…and several others all shackled together to resemble a typical narrow street in town. In fact, you could very well assume it was a real town though it was in the dead of night and no one was walking around except for a black dog fast asleep on a bench. To the east were more of the houses, while the west had the view of the administrative buildings and the temple. Beyond that, I could see the haunting silhouettes of the mountains and a hard lump formed in my throat. I guess it finally hit me that I was going to die in this place; that even though I had my 'freedom', this would be the last time I'd ever get to see Nature's beauty as it was meant to be.

I slumped back down to the floor in defeat and raised my knees to my chest to bury my face against them. Every ache and pain I experienced only did more to bring back the memories of my hours and days spent in that hell. Coupled with my weird dream of Kojima, I was beginning to feel mingled emotions of despair, helplessness, bitterness and that solid forming mass called hate – all over again.

I knew I had done some bad things in my life, but was it worth me being abused like that? Was it worth being _violated_ in the worst way possible? I could almost laugh at the notion of considering myself lucky he hadn't actually decided to go the extra step in his violation by actually sticking his dick inside me. Lucky? Yep. I sure was one lucky bastard.

_/Luck? I think not, my dear Uzumaki Naruto./_

I shuddered at the watery voice of Kojima filtering into my ears and squeezed my eyes shut. I did not understand what his words had meant. That I was a _'natural born killer'_? Was that supposed to be an insult? Or praise?

_Then why did he smile when you shot him? Remember what he said to you? "I knew you had it in you."_

So did that make him right? Did Kojima know something that I didn't?

I raised my hands in the dully lit room (thanks to the moon's glow) and eyed my hands. These large, grimy, blood-stained hands. Were they really made for the gun? To kill others?

No…to _protect_ others. Wasn't that why I wanted to become an elite watchdog in the first place? Hadn't their motto been _to protect and serve_? Wasn't that all it was? To see the smiles on people's faces as they thanked me for rescuing them? To be recognized by others and to be seen as someone worth admiring in society?

"Hah…haha…hahahahahaha!"

I really hadn't expected to burst into such cynical laughter, but there it was before I could control myself. It bubbled up within me, and I couldn't shut up. I pounded my fist on the mat and nearly doubled over with my bitter mirth.

So much for being an elite officer.

If elite officers were like the ones I had seen so far, in Byaku-Shinkyou, well…they could all take their goddamn badges and shove it up their asses. In fact, I think I _will_ do that when I seek revenge on this place. Make them all bend over and shove their badges right up their anuses until it bled and they begged for mercy. For the Fat Slob, I'd stick it so far up his ass, he'd be kissing my fingers and then when it was that snobbish captain Sasukewhatever's turn, I'd make him lick the very floor I walk on before –

The door to my closet space suddenly slid open to reveal a still slightly-sleepy but annoyed Shikamaru.

"Shsssh," he hissed with a finger to his lips and a quick glance behind him. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

Somehow seeing him with his hair down – which made him look like a girl – got the laughter welling up again. I would have pointed that out to him, when the sudden sensation of his hand against my mouth…

_(can't breathe. Can't breathe. Can't breathe. Can't breathe! Don't touch me! Don't touch me! Don't fucking touch me!)_

…erased the laughter immediately as I slapped it away with more venom than necessary. He must have seen something in my eyes because, instead of getting pissed off for what I did, he only held his hand to his chest and nodded softly as if in understanding.

"It's okay, Naruto. I'm sorry, all right?" he muttered. "I won't…won't do that again, but you've got to keep your voice down. There are others here you know."

Others? What others? As if reading my thoughts, he moved aside a little to reveal the room behind him.

Ah…_those_ others.

There were about thirty futons in the large room and each was occupied by a man dressed in the now familiar drab yukatas. They were all fast asleep; some in some rather interesting positions – with legs and arms flailing all over the place, some snoring, some drooling, and one or two who seemed more content sleeping while sitting up. I couldn't see an empty futon which must have belonged to Shikamaru, and the question must have been in my eyes because he shrugged lightly.

"I sleep by the door," he explained with a gentle tap. "To keep an eye on you."

"Why?" I raised a brow and tried to tone down my sarcasm. "So I wouldn't run away? So they sic Mommy Shikamaru on me?"

"You ungrateful fucktard," he cursed softly. "You know how much trouble you've put me through since we've been here?"

"So why did you bring me here if I was going to cause so much trouble, _Mom_? You should have left me back down there to die."

I huffed and lay back down; turning away from him to pull the thin blanket over me. I knew I was being an asshole, but I honestly didn't give a fuck right now. My bitterness was still acidic on my tongue.

"Maybe I should have left you to die," Shikamaru agreed without preamble. "Maybe it would have been better."

I grunted and said nothing; though I was holding my breath and waiting for him to leave me alone again. However, I didn't hear the sound of the door closing and wondering if he had fallen asleep in position, I glanced over my shoulder to see him still kneeling there. He wasn't looking at me though, but did have his arms crossed on his chest; his expression thoughtful as if admiring the tatami mats.

"You've been in here for almost three weeks," Shikamaru finally said quietly.

Three…_three weeks?_

"For three weeks, I've had to do this shitty job of being your bodyguard," he continued in that same quiet tone. "Three weeks of cleaning up after you, feeding you, bathing you, shaving you, tending to your wounds, making sure these guys…" He nodded to the sleeping men. "…didn't kick you out because they thought you were getting special treatment, and generally trying to convince myself that maybe that nice guy I met that first night was still in there somewhere." He finally looked up to meet my gaze; his eyes dark and inscrutable. "Guess not."

Ouch.

"I'm not going to sit here and assume that what you went through wasn't hell, Naruto. It's something I wouldn't wish on anyone, but I'll be damned if I'm going to let you put all my hard work to waste."

_Huh?_ What's he getting upset about? I'm the one who should be…!

"You think remaining in here and sulking is going to solve anything?" he hissed. Yep. He was definitely pissed about something, and I had the feeling it wasn't just at me.

"You're relatively well enough to walk around," he continued. "But I've lied and bought you at least one more week of recovery time. That's a whole month of being pampered by yours truly. If it wasn't for Asuma telling me to do this, goodness knows I'd have other things to deal with."

Who the hell is Asuma?

"Bottom line, when your week is up, you're on kitchen duty – just about the only thing you can do until you're at least ninety-percent or completely healed."

"Kitchen…?"

"Yes. Scrubbing, cleaning, and serving…that sort of thing. It's the easiest job I could lobby for you. That or you would have been working at the hills digging up rocks for another of Lord Orochimaru's grand buildings."

"Oh…"

"So do us all a favor…no…do _me_ a favor and get over it as best you can. It sucks, but life goes on. _Your_ life goes on…at least until…you know. Either way, while you're technically 'out', you might as well make the best of it. Get to know the layout of the place, make friends, know your enemies and all that shit. Who knows? If you kiss the asses of the right people, they might forget all about Gudan eventually."

_Yeah right, still…_

"Fair enough," I shrugged lightly. "Then I can come back and finish up a few things."

He raised a brow, but didn't seem all surprised at my clipped words. "You and a bunch of others," he finally said with a small smirk. "If I had a yen for every time I've heard a sinner vow to wreck their revenge on this place…I'd be a fucking billionaire by now." He snorted and slid the door shut before I could get another word in, though his muted voice filtered through.

"Get some sleep and don't try to be too active or they'll find out and kick you outta here earlier than you should. Got it?"

"Yes, sir."

His low chuckle brought a weak smile to my face, but his words did give me food for thought as I snuggled back beneath my blanket to glare at the wall before me.

_Get over it?_ Hardly likely. Know the layout of the place? Make a few friends? That was definitely a plan. If the others who had tried to destroy Byaku-Shinkyou hadn't succeeded over the years, then it was time to change the pattern. **I** would be the one to make a difference, and if I was deciphering the meaning behind Shikamaru's words, I had the feeling even _he_ wanted me to succeed. I knew my time was limited, but I was determined to make the best of it.

_I won't let you down,_ I vowed as my lashes slowly began to get heavier with weariness. _Don't you worry, Shikamaru._ _One day…it will all come to an end._

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke:<em>

"Now remember your hitting points as I showed you earlier. _Men_," I struck the top of my assistant's head with the _shinai_ lightly.

"_Hidari-men_," I hit the left side of his head. "_Migi-men._" I struck the right. "_Tsuki._" I pointed at his neck. "_Kote._" Struck his wrist. "_Do._" Struck his ribs, both left and right before stepping back with the _shinai_ balanced on my shoulder. I eyed the class of ten young boys – the oldest must have been at least thirteen – all sitting before me with rapt attention.

"Keep those points in mind while you spar, but bear in mind that you must not use _tsuki_ too often. I will be watching carefully. If any of you miss a point, you will have me or the instructors to answer to. _Hajime!_"

"_Osu!_" they roared in unison before rising to their feet to face their opponents.

For the next half-hour, I performed the role of master instructor; either observing or stopping partners when I felt they were doing things the wrong way. There were two other adult instructors with me, so the burden was eased off my shoulders from having to keep an eye on all the teams at the same time.

"You must tighten your grip," I explained as I stooped to my haunches to show the kid how it was done. He was pretty short, a reminder of how I was at his age and had to fight with the bigger kids. The uniform and protective mask seemed to swallow him whole, but there was a fire of determination in his eyes that I could appreciate. Something told me he was going to be a good fighter with a little more practice.

A shadow suddenly seemed to fall into the dojo, and a quick glance towards the opened doors refilled Asuma's towering frame. He was out of uniform, but dressed in Western clothes instead of his usual kimono or yukata. He hovered at the doorway and waved at me; knowing he couldn't step into the dojo in such an outfit. I nodded in understanding and motioned for him to give me five more minutes. He had been gone for the past week, for some assignment, and a part of me was glad to see him again.

Leaving instructions to my assistants, I excused myself and left the warm confines of the dojo and into the chilly afternoon. Winter was officially in full bloom, and the weather forecast had called for snow in the next few days. The once blooming sakura trees that surrounded the two main buildings for training, now looked skeletal and hungry, but there was still something poignant about its starkness.

I found Asuma sitting on a stone slab next to the second dojo lighting up a cigarette. He grinned and waved me over, while patting the spot next to him.

"You're looking well," I greeted as I admired the heavy black wool coat draped around his shoulders. "How was the trip?"

"Productive," came his enigmatic reply as he smiled at me. "Miss me that much?"

My cheeks flared with color at the insinuation. "You wish."

He laughed and reached into the pocket of his brown suit. "I got you an early Christmas present. Tadaaa!"

I eyed the black box on his palm, before raising a brow in bemusement. "What is it?"

"Well, you won't find out if you keep staring at it," he teased and moved it closer to me. "Go on. Open it. It won't bite."

Shaking my head at his insufferable attitude, I reached for the gift to open it (somewhat) impatiently. I could tell he was watching me with amusement, and as I shuffled through the white tissue, I finally made out the small good luck charm within. It was a silver…well…cat with an inscription and prayer engraved behind it.

"As soon as I saw it," Asuma drawled. "I thought to myself, now _that_ is going to be right up Sasuke-chan's alley."

"…do you have a death wish?" I growled. I didn't know whether to laugh or to cry or to kill him for this. It wasn't as if the cat was attractive. This one looked hideous with its leery grin and bugged out eyes.

"You don't like it?" came the bemused question tinged with what seemed like genuine dismay. I looked up to meet Asuma's gaze; wondering if he was kidding, but the man did look like he was disappointed. "Aww, and the old geezer I bought it from said it was definitely going to keep all the bad things away from you."

I struggled not to roll my eyes, but tucked the charm within my kimono all the same. "Thanks. It was very thoughtful."

"Say that with any more sarcasm, and I just might start believing you actually mean what you say."

"Shut up already."

He snickered and leaned back against the stone wall. "I'm guessing I won't be getting any Christmas present from you this year, huh?"

I mimicked his position; my hands clasped on my stomach as I watched several officers march by while doing their afternoon drill. "What do you want?"

"Stupid. You don't ask people what they want for Christmas. You surprise them."

"Didn't I do that one time?"

Asuma snorted. "Yes…you were ten or so…and fetched me a dead lizard."

"It was still alive when I caught it."

"So just you holding it made it die? Good God, man. You really are the God of Death."

I jabbed an elbow in his ribs, trying to stifle a smile as he pretended to be really in pain by doubling over and moaning as loud as he could. We got a few curious glances from some passing purified sinners, and I had to nudge him again to get him to shut up. All the same, it did bring back memories of past Christmases spent in this place...which was pretty much non-existent.

Within Byaku-Shinkyou, the holiday was not observed because Orochimaru did not believe in it. Simple as that. You would not find Christmas trees or lights within the grounds, but that didn't stop the folks in town from observing it without his permission. Perhaps, thanks to Orochimaru, I had really put no stock in the holiday itself. To me, it was simply just another cold day. It was only Asuma who did his best to remind me of it with his odd gifts every year. Last time it had been a pair of baby blue bunny slippers; something still gathering dust in my closet. I had just about died in embarrassment when he presented it with Haku in the room, though my glare had dared my manservant to burst into laughter. I mean for God's sakes, those things lit up when you walked! How juvenile was that?

"How's he holding up?" came the sudden question that had me jerking back to the present.

"How's who holding up?"

"Haku."

"Oh." I kicked out a leg absently. "He's much better now. I allowed him to pay his final respects to Zabuza…"

"How magnanimous of you."

"I told you, it wasn't as if I planned it," I hissed angrily. "How was I supposed to know those fools would over do it?"

"Torture usually does that, Sasuke," Asuma replied dryly. His gaze was trained on the skeletal branches above us; as tendrils of his cigarette smoke danced into the wind. "Whenever you sentence anyone down there…what the fuck do you expect?"

"Well, those responsible have been dealt with," I interrupted with a huff. "New guidelines are in place, so…so…"

"That makes it all better," Asuma finished with a wry grin.

"Fuck you," I growled and rose to my feet. I didn't have to deal with this shit.

I could hear him calling me, but I was still too pissed at his suggestion that 'my ways' were not in accordance to what has always been done in the past. Was it my fault that the torturers were getting too happy with their jobs and didn't understand what moderation meant? Good grief! I was only doing _my_ goddamn job! Why did everyone have to be on my -?

"Urgh!"

"Fuck!"

The collision would have been comical, if I was in that kind of mood, because the loud clatter of things falling around us finally had me opening my eyes to stare at what the hell I had run into.

At first I was confused as to why I was seeing steel pots, pans, and plastic plates (in different colors) at my feet – after all the kitchens were at the other end of the compound – but even more dumbfounded when I realized _who_ it was across me. The blond hair might not have been enough - considering there were a few other blond people around the grounds – but it was that undeniable scarring on his face and the cold blue eyes that forced his name back to my consciousness.

_Uzumaki Naruto. _

For a second, he too looked stricken, before something hard and impenetrable came over him. I watched his lips part as if to say something before they thinned into a downward frown as if tasting something sour.

"You two okay?" came the question that had us both looking up to Asuma. His arms were folded on his chest, and he looked absolutely amused about something. Recalling his last words to me, his present attitude, and now me sitting on the ground with a dirty kimono and pots and pans around me thanks to _someone_ not watching where they were going…I was officially irritated.

"Do you find it hard to walk, Uzumaki Naruto?" I grated coldly as I stood up; ignoring Asuma's offered hand, and dusting off the seat of my clothing. "And besides, why are you _here_? The kitchens are the other way, you heathen."

"My apologies," came the quiet reply, which I did not believe to be sincere for a second. Maybe it was because of that look I had seen earlier; that expression that had revealed a side of him that could be dangerous in more ways than one. "It's my first day working in the kitchen, and they told me to take this back there…guess I lost my way."

He tried to look sheepish; scratching the back of his head and giving a smile that felt forced. "I'll just pick these up and get out of your way…sir." I had a feeling the 'sir' was an afterthought.

He rose to his feet, only to bend again to pick up the pots and pans – some of which had rolled away and he had to jog a little to pick them up. However, I would have been a fool not to notice his movements were a little strained. The bandages were no longer around his feet, but I could tell he was still getting used to actually walking with his heels now, and though the sleeves of the yukata were long, there was no mistaking the bruises around his wrists and the fading ones on his cheek and temple. Just how long had he been in the East Block?

As he straightened up, it was impossible to miss the low gasp of pain he emitted; a hand going to his left ribs as if to control the pain. He seemed to pause as if to catch his breath, and when he was sure he wasn't going to fall (or faint), dumped the last plate into the large plastic container with something muttered beneath his breath.

I really wasn't aware I had been studying him for this long until he caught my gaze again. I felt my cheeks suddenly flaring with color at the notion that I had been caught doing such a thing in the first place. It was infuriating that I was allowing myself to get sucked into his antics, and a part of me wanted to suddenly kick the container to spill the contents out again; just so he could suffer a little more.

However, instead of resorting to such cheap, childish tactics, I grit my teeth and spun on my heels to get away from the scene before I caved in to that side of me again. I could hear Asuma saying something to Naruto, and though I was curious to know what was being exchanged, it didn't take long for his footsteps to follow me as I made my way towards the dojo.

"Nice kid," he began amiably. "He said to apologize to you again for bumping into you."

I snorted in derision. "Yeah right. You saw the way he looked at me. He wanted to kill me."

"Nah. How is that possible? I mean…sure anyone would want to hug you tightly for calling them a heathen."

I slammed a palm against the wall of the dojo as I came to a stop. Turning to face him, I spoke as succinctly as possible. "I am not a fool, Asuma. You cannot tell me that he conveniently lost his way toward the dojo, can you? It cannot be his first day either! I released him almost a month ago!"

"…and he's been spending that month recovering," Asuma stated quietly. "Do you have any idea what they did to him down there, Sasuke?"

What? What is this? What the hell is this feeling? Why is he looking at me like that? With those eyes that seem to be mixed with pity and anger? And why is my heart suddenly beating so fast? Why is he trying to make me feel _guilt_ over something _good_ that I did? Wasn't my decree of freedom adequate enough? What else did he want from me?

And yet as flashes and glimpses of Uzumaki Naruto's wounds and bruises came back to me; that dull pang hit again – much stronger this time. I didn't understand it. I had sentenced many others before him to their fates, so why was this situation so different from the others?

_Because you saw what was within him, didn't you? Your 'eyes' saw the inherent good within the sinner, and now…maybe you've managed to wipe that goodness with your self-righteous notion of justice. The light in his eyes now…what does that tell you, Sasuke?_

"But hey…don't mind me," Asuma was saying with a stretch of his arms above his head and a loud yawn. "I mean…he should be licking your boots for his 'freedom', eh? At least he's alive and well…unlike the other one who didn't quite make it."

"I…"

But Asuma was already turning on his heels with a wave of his hand over his head in farewell. "See you around, young master, oh…and I wouldn't dismiss that lucky charm thing so quickly. Might want to give it a proper looksee when you've got the time. See ya."

"What do you mea…?"

But I was talking to the wind as Asuma was already out of sight. I dug into my kimono for the charm; wincing inwardly at the leering cat before turning it around again to read the inscription. What in the world could be so fascinating about the obvious generic blessing of 'May this protect you from all harm'?

_Protect me from all harm…_

/Beware the enemies that lurk in the dark/

What did it all mean? How were the two related? Did Asuma know about the attack? I was yet to tell him about the events of that day, and Kurobachi's updates had been less than satisfactory. According to him, yes there had been an influx of Chinese visitors to the town, but most were traders and only a handful were possible suspects. They claimed not to know anything about any mafia involvement, and Kurobachi had no other option but to release them. All the same, he promised he would still keep an eye out for anything 'worth reporting.'

"Sasuke-sensei! Sasuke-sensei!"

I looked up with a start at the sound of my name. It was one of my older students from the dojo; a reminder that I had been teaching before this whole mess started.

"Are you coming back to the dojo?" the kid asked with a bemused frown. I nodded and began to climb up the steps. However, just as I reached out to pet the boy's head gently, I noticed two uniformed officers – from Orochimaru's private court – approaching the building.

Great. Another summoning no doubt.

"Sasuke-sama?" one of them called out with a polite bow. "Lord Orochimaru would like to see you immediately."

I nodded in understanding. "Tell him I'll see him as soon as my classes are finished."

"He insists you stop whatever you are doing, sir. It is urgent," the second officer stated with an expression that let me know he didn't really care much for me and would drag my ass to Orochimaru's if necessary. The prick.

"I said I will see him as soon as my classes are finished," I repeated slowly, just in case they hadn't heard me. "Now if you will excuse me. I have students to attend to."

I spun on my heels and made my way into the dojo; immediately barking out instructions to the students who had been slacking off.

Whatever the hell Orochimaru wanted to see me for could wait at least another half-hour. Besides, if I knew that pervert's schedule, it was probably to watch him get dressed again or to engage in some asinine conversation about 'how my day went'.

Totally and completely pointless.

* * *

><p><em>Naruto: <em>

You know what? I really was having a perfectly good day until that shit just had to happen.

I slammed the container with more force than necessary on the table, hence igniting my new boss's ire as he stomped out of the storage room to begin his nagging.

"Where the hell were you?" he bellowed. "You were supposed to bring those damn things over an hour again, Uzumaki!"

"Sorry, sorry," I bowed and gave a sheepish laugh. "I really was lost. I thought Umeshi said go left, and I ended up going around and around in circles. Sorry."

I bowed again and waited for him to slap my head or something, but all he did was give a grunt before turning away with an order for me to "start unloading the damn things because we had dinner to make!"

"Yes, sir!" I yelled with a mock salute. He glared at me, but turned his focus back to his cooks who were peeling about a million potatoes at one side of the enormous kitchen. It was chaos in here – organized chaos that is – but heaven compared to what I've experienced in this shit hole so far. The simmering and delicious smells of fried and grilled fish, sliced beef, stir-fried vegetables, sauces, soups and stews assailed my senses and just about made me drool.

As for my boss, for all the hard time I gave him, he really was a nice guy. He looked like he could be a grandpa – with his frizzy white hair and wrinkled visage – and he liked to wear his white chef uniform and floppy hat like one of those French chefs you see in the magazines or movies. He was a small guy – about two inches shorter than me – but _damn_…was he the best and fastest cook I had ever seen. He could whip up a plate of _udon_ in five minutes flat and have it tasting like something from God Himself. Sure most of the better food was served to the officers, but every now and then, he'd allow me to have a 'sample' especially if I had done a good job that day.

And I _did_ love this job, surprising I know. Believe me, I've done some really shitty jobs in the past (nothing beats cleaning up feces while working, part time, for a plumbing company) so the concept of washing pans and plates, or scrubbing floors, sweeping the dining room, polishing the furniture, or running other errands, was pretty much child's play to me. Since I wasn't a fully purified sinner, I couldn't make any money, but I didn't mind. Where would I use the money anyway considering I was set for death, right?

I did appreciate the 'pay' of eating good food for the first time in nearly two months. In this first week alone, I must have eaten more than I ever had in all that time combined. Shikamaru had said I lost a lot of weight, so I made it up by sneaking bits and pieces of food whenever the cooks or Chef wasn't looking. And also to thank him for not giving up on me, and being such a good 'Mom', I'd sometimes steal a little something extra (tucking it into my yukata), which we'd later share in my closet space when the others were fast asleep. To be honest, we sinners didn't exactly get to eat the best food either. We usually had the watered down versions of the awesome meals the officers received, and were only allowed to eat when they done. We had a separate dining hall, and as you can well imagine, it wasn't as nice or fancy as the officers'. You'd have to line up and march to the counter where the servers would dump your pan of food onto your tray before ordering you to move on even if you wanted to complain about your portion being too small. They just didn't give a shit.

Anyway, did I forget to mention how humongous the kitchen was? I worked in one or two restaurants during my travels, but none of them were this big or modernized. There must have been at least ten electric stoves and grilles with something being cooked on it at any given time. At least there were twenty purified sinners at work; half of whom were assistant chefs – under the watchful eye of Chef Grandpa – and the rest like me – the grunt workers. It could be pretty tiring as I literally worked from morning to night – seven days a week.

I had to be up at five in the morning, sweep out the dining hall and polish up the furniture, then set the tables for all the officers who would be having breakfast. I wasn't allowed to actually serve them yet, considering I was still 'unpurified' or whatever, but I did have to accept all the dirty dishes as they came through the conveyor belt and begin washing like I had never washed before (in other words - _fast_). Even before the officers were done with breakfast, lunch was already being worked on. Which meant that by the time I was done with the dishwashing, it was time to head back into the dining hall to set up for lunch. This cycle would repeat itself until the last meal was eaten around ten at night. I wasn't officially allowed to leave until midnight, and by then I was so exhausted (and aching all over) but satisfied enough to sleep until the bell would shatter my dreamless nights at five in the morning.

So far, I had taken Shikamaru's words to heart. After my extra week of 'rest', in which I did my best to play possum and act up my pain and suffering to the fullest; finally getting an opportunity to step outside without being shackled was fucking awesome. Many of my new roommates (well, more like housemates) didn't really like me at first, but eventually they began to come around, especially when I'd regale them with (embellished) stories about my escapades and how I was destined for Death Row because of my crimes. One of them admitted that they usually didn't hang around 'unpurified' sinners, but the fact that I was set for Gudan gave them a whole new respect for me. They believed I didn't fear death.

I didn't have the heart to tell them otherwise.

On the positive side, my wounds were healing rapidly, but the bruises were still reminders, every now and then, especially the physical aches after straining myself for too long. I still couldn't bend down often, so Chef allowed me to run more errands instead of doing other back breaking work.

It was during one such errand that I decided to make a little detour.

I was already familiar with the layout of the kitchens, dining hall and town homes for the sinners, and at night, I was able to sketch out a blueprint of it's haphazard design with a piece of paper and pencil I bummed from a fellow housemate. From what I could tell so far, the kitchen was interconnected with the two dinning halls, making a rough H-shape. There was also another building (like a broken piece of the H) adjacent to these four, which was the exclusive banquet hall. It was where Lord Orochimaru would host his big events whenever he had guests in town. About a mile down, was the laundry/dry cleaning service where sinners were given the duty of washing every officer's uniform and other material necessary for Byaku-Shinkyou. It was a pretty busy section and even at the end of the day, you'd always see the smoke rising from the building; a sign of more clothes being washed or pressed into the wee hours of the morning.

However, I was yet to familiarize myself with the other side of the compound, which was mainly made up of the administrative offices, the temple, and dojos. So what better excuse than to pretend as if I was lost?

I wandered around aimlessly for a while, all the time making sure I was moving in the direction of the temple. Whenever I would walk past the guards or watchdogs, I'd dutifully lower my gaze and try to look as contrite as possible; or maybe to blend into the scenery and not be bothered. Luckily, no one stopped or questioned me about anything, which was good. I wondered if I could get to hang out with Shikamaru for a couple of minutes. He said he would be working on landscaping today, but as I passed the gardens (which were beautiful by the way), I couldn't make out his familiar figure among the other sinners on duty. Guess he was done for the day.

When I got close to the temple, I was not disappointed with the breath-taking architecture. I almost felt bad that I would have to destroy it someday, but some things just had to be done. I was more than tempted to walk into the building, but wondered if I wouldn't go up in flames because I was such a 'sinner'. Either way, it really was nice to be outside like this; far from the depths of darkness, the sweaty kitchens, and out into a section of Byaku-Shinkyou that told a completely different story.

This was the section the visitors saw; the perfect tranquil setting for such a historical place. I could almost picture the tourists, _oohing_ and _aahing_ over everything as they took their pictures and posed in front of the important landmarks.

_Oh, if you could only see the underbelly of hatred and despair. Maybe you wouldn't think of Byaku-Shinkyou so highly then. _

The mountains were much closer this way as well, and it was while I was drifting off into fantasy land about hiking up one of them someday, did my day take a very sour turn.

It wasn't so much the collision/bump in as much as it was the expression on that bastard's face. He had the gall to look as if it was _my_ fault he hadn't been looking where he was going. Okay, so yes, I was technically at fault too because I was staring off, but _still_, he was the one stomping around the corner like a goddamn elephant whose meat had been taken away from him, and then…WHAM!

Talk about getting the wind knocked out of your sails.

I really had been ready to start apologizing right off the bat, but then he had to open his mouth to talk, and as expected, nothing but that self-righteous attitude oozed out of him. If it wasn't for that big guy showing up, who knows what I would have done? I might have had a chance at taking him out there and then.

_One down…so many more to go…_

Besides…why the fuck was he staring at me like that? Guess he couldn't believe I was still alive, huh? Well look hard and long, oh Captain. I plan on sticking around and making your life a living hell if I can manage it -

"Don't mind him," the big guy was saying after Mr. High and Mighty had stomped off again. I looked at him and immediately felt an ease I had not experienced with anyone in a watchdog uniform before. In fact, his face looked damn familiar now that I thought about it.

_Oh right…he was the guy who was announcing the crimes when jerk-ass was doing his sentencing. _

He looked different in his suit and coat though. Much bigger and even more intimidating, but he appeared to be a nice enough guy, and the way he smoked reminded me of Kojima. I didn't know if that was good or bad.

"He's actually got a heart beneath all that…surliness," the big man continued with a smile. "Asuma's the name." He actually held out his hand to me, and for a stupid second, I thought he wanted me to give him something, before I realized I was supposed to shake it.

I didn't want to touch him. I was still jittery about that to be honest, but I couldn't leave him hanging either. Swallowing tightly, I reached out to give the hand a firm pump before releasing it quickly and resisting the urge to wipe it down my clothes.

"Uzumaki Naruto," I began.

"I know who you are," Asuma interrupted with a wink that had me raising a brow in confusion. "Something tells me I'll be seeing a whole lot more of you, young man." He tipped an imaginary hat in farewell. "See you around and give my regards to Shikamaru."

"Oh…" But the man was already trotting after Mr. High and Mighty, leaving me bewildered as to the conversation we just had.

_Seeing me around more?_ Guess so, since I technically now worked in the kitchens. I shrugged and decided to put it out of my thoughts, but I was still in a bad mood. My perfectly good day had been ruined.

"What's gone up your crotch now?" came the query from my fellow dish-washer as he bit into a carrot and crunched loudly. His name was Chouji Akimichi, and he's been working in the kitchens since he was incarcerated almost five years ago. His plump figure and waist-length red hair made him stand out amongst the other workers (well besides one of the assistant chefs), but he was a pretty cool guy to hang out with especially during the rare lull periods we had. He could tell the best stories, and had taken to me the moment I walked in here unlike some of the others. He didn't seem to have a pretentious bone in his body, and I could appreciate that.

"I was taking a walk and had to meet up with the devil," I grumbled as I began stacking the pots in their places. "God must really hate me."

He guffawed and scratched at his chest; revealing that black tattoo everyone seemed to have. Shikamaru had finally told me what they meant. It was a 'seal' given to all purified sinners; a sign to show that they had renounced their ways and were now productive and 'healed' members of society. The seal could be placed on any part of their bodies, and while Chouji's was on his upper right breast, Shikamaru had his on his left shoulder.

_(and Fat Slob had his on…)_

I shuddered and shook my head to get rid of that image. I _had_ to move on, as Shikamaru had told me. I couldn't keep going back there, but try as I might, it didn't deter from the fact that there were others _still_ underground…right at this very minute…suffering through the most ungodly punishment ever dealt to another human being.

_And it's all his doing,_ I thought bitterly as the image of that pale visage and dark eyes, filled my mind. _Everyday, he hands out his judgment. How many more since then? Forty? Fifty? A hundred more since then?_ I was unaware of the plastic plate being squeezed between my hands until the loud snap, as it broke in two, had me looking at it with comical bemusement.

"There goes your paycheck," Chouji teased.

I chuckled weakly and tossed the useless dish into the garbage can. "Yeah…they can take it out of my fucking corpse if they want."

Chouji's laughter was a soothing balm to my thudding headache, and as I continued to arrange the pots and pans in their places, I allowed that tiny (growing) dark side of me to continue its many fantasies of how wonderful and rewarding it would be to have the first captain at my utter and complete mercy.

_...to have just a little taste of his own medicine..._


	8. 08: Deception

**Notes: **Oh my God! I got more reviews/comments! *does the Snoopy Dance* Thank you, guys! Really. I appreciate all your words - good or bad because it means that the story and characters are resonating with you in some way. I know some of you were not 'pleased' with Naruto's behavior in the past chapter, but I ask you to put yourself in his shoes and to try to understand why he was acting that way. If you have been abused and violated in the worst way humanly possible...are you not justified in your actions in feeling hatred towards those who have done that to you? Can we really expect you to return to being 'happy-go-lucky' or for him to quickly warm up to Sasuke - the very person who sent him to the torture chamber? Doubt it. Also, he does not know what Sasuke's thinking; neither does he realize that Sasuke might be re-thinking his ways. In fact, I dare say everything has not been revealed to him yet, so we'll just have to wait and see what happens when he learns the truth. Until then, hold on to your jock straps and bras, boys and girls. Methinks the fun is just beginning! :D

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 08: <strong>

**Deception**

* * *

><p><em>Out of the darkness<em>

_On a dark path, _

_I now set out. _

_Shine on me,_

_Moon of the mountain edge._

_- Izumi Shikibu_

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke:<em>

I was wrong.

Not only was Orochimaru _not_ getting dressed; his demeanor reeked of anything but the trivial joviality I was used to. As I knelt before the low desk, he barely acknowledged my arrival; only sparing me a quick icy glare before turning his attention to the documents he was reading and signing. His personal officers (Kimimaro included) hovered around; waiting patiently as he snapped out instructions or gave orders for one thing or another to be carried out.

As he continued to ignore me, I did my best to keep my features expressionless – choosing instead to focus on the lucky charm, still within my _obi_, and Asuma's cryptic words. I was yet to decipher what else the inscription could mean, and I made a mental note to speak to him tonight to find out exactly what he was trying to tell me. I sighed and made the little mistake of closing my eyes to collect myself; only to lift my lashes quickly as a now familiar pair of icy blue eyes had me giving a reluctant shudder of awareness.

_Why_ did I have to think of _him_ again? Considering I had done a good job getting rid of that pesky sinner from my thoughts while teaching at the dojo after our unfortunate meeting.

I realized it was, technically, the first time I had ever heard him speak, and if it wasn't for the murderous intent that had oozed off him, his voice could almost be considered…pleasant and friendly. It would fit the persona I had noticed during the bus ride to Byaku-Shinkyou; the warm gaze he had given me a few times as if…as if…

As if _what_ exactly?

_Attraction…he must have been attracted to you,_ came a tiny voice within me. _The expression he had during the ride was clearly that of a man liking what he saw and wanting to get to know the other person better. Remember the shy smiles he'd give when you looked his way? Or how he'd pretend as if he was doing something else when he was clearly staring at you?_

Which meant my first assumption was correct then. Uzumaki Naruto was clearly one of _them. _Forget the fact that he allegedly killed his _girlfriend's_ murderer. He could be someone that didn't mind what sex was in his bed.

I resisted the urge to vomit; gritting my teeth and swallowing down what I had felt rising to my throat. Still, a part of me argued that It _couldn't_ be 'attraction'…especially considering how quickly Naruto's demeanor had changed when I met him in 'The Pit' later that night. Gone was the warm and perverted look, and in its place, the venomous danger that had sent a thrill of familiar sadistic delight within me. It had been the look of a man desperate, angry, yet unable to do a damn thing about it.

Today, it was a little different.

The anger was still there, no doubt about it, but its intensity was nearly scorching. If looks could kill, I might have been dead within seconds.

_Can you blame him?_ Mr. Tiny Voice continued relentlessly. _You know exactly why he feels that way, don't you?_

/…he's been spending that month recovering. Do you have any idea what they did to him down there? /

I captured my lower lip between my teeth and lowered my lashes. I had no idea. How would I know? I had only been to the East Block a handful of times over the years, and my last visitation had been almost a year ago to inspect the facilities with Orochimaru. I realized I had watched the proceedings – the whipping of a man so full of sin, he was literally nothing more than a black mass in my eyes – dispassionately. I had no feeling one way or another for the sinner, and since then never really bothered to see any of them as being…well…_human_. It was the same way I felt when it came to the final ritual of Gudan. After the first two times of my role as executioner - in which I felt sick to my stomach at what I was doing - you eventually learn to block out the humanity in the sinners and see them for what they were; nothing more than evils of society that had to be expelled for their souls to somehow find their way to heaven.

I was doing them a _big_ favor by making their passage to the next life a quick and easy one. I should have been commended for my efforts, and I think I was – at least Orochimaru approved. I do recall Asuma hardly speaking to me for a week after the festivities were over, but I had only assumed it was because he was too busy with paperwork and his duties. Looking back now, I guess it was just his way of saying he disapproved of my decision to become an active participant in the festival of cleansing.

_He just doesn't understand…_

To top it all off, come summer of next year…I was already signed up to be the one to execute the blue-eyed sinner. There was no going back on my decision now, neither did I want to. Yes…I would be doing him a favor (and me too, now that I think about it). With him out of the picture, perhaps I could return back to the old me; the one who did not dream of the sinners, the one who did not care for their bruises and wounds, the one who did not have to worry about whether or not they wanted to see me dead. I knew almost all the sinners hated my guts, so why would one scarred murderer make any difference to me?

A welcome sense of relief washed over me as I came to my justified conclusion. I lifted my lashes, and felt I could breathe again. My duties as an officer and elite watchdog came first. Everything else was second or unimportant.

As it turned out, Orochimaru made me kneel for almost thirty minutes – obviously punishment for 'wasting his time'. I think I had managed not to show my irritation at this cheap tactic, and as soon as the last officer left the room, he finally acknowledged my existence.

"We will be heading to Kyoto first thing in the morning," he announced, while shuffling the sheaf of papers before him. I think I noticed a letterhead with the words **~Ministry of Defense~** on it, but I could be mistaken. What business could he possibly have with the Ministry of Defense for crying out loud?

"So make plans to have your official duties assigned to someone else," he continued while neatly arranging the papers in a folder, "We should be there for about a week…or less if I can manage it," he added with a mumble.

Wait…what does he mean by 'we'?

"We?" I asked aloud in bemusement. "Am I accompanying you on this journey?"

He gave me a look of exasperation. "I realize it's probably been a long day for you, Sasuke, but try to keep up with me, okay?" He snapped his fingers as if talking to an imbecile, and it was all I could do not to hit something in annoyance. "Did I not just say you had to re-organize your duties? Assign them to someone trustworthy and get ready. Our ride leaves here first thing in the morning. Oh, and pack some suits or western clothes. We will be in the city after all, and I doubt your kimonos will be fitting."

_Thanks,_ I thought sarcastically, but bit the inside of my cheek hard to prevent that word from slipping out. "Will I need my uniform?" I asked instead.

"No," Orochimaru replied with a brief shake of his head. He unrolled a scroll, and I watched as he read through it quickly; his lips thinning with what I recognized as impatience or simmering irritation at something. I wasn't sure of what was going on, but there was a frantic ambience in the air. Orochimaru looked…_uncomfortable_ and that discomfort was translating into his behavior right now.

Not to be deterred by his attitude, I pestered on. "What about Haku? Can I bring him with me?"

"Must you have a babysitter with you at all times?" came the sneer that sent a flood of color to my cheeks. _Point taken, asshole._

"Do you mind me asking what we'll be doing in Kyoto?"

"Sightseeing," came the immediate answer that had me raising a brow in disbelief. Orochimaru spared me another glance; only the corner of his lips was quirked up as if trying to smile but couldn't quite manage the action. "We were invited by Councilman Shimura Danzo. You remember him, don't you?"

I nodded. Who could forget him? Though his visits were far and in between these days, I did remember him visiting my father on a few occasions.

"He insisted you come see the sights and sounds of Kyoto," Orochimaru continued with a roll of his eyes. "But I need you for something else; to be a witness to a meeting of fools who control the government."

_What?_

The older man gave a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes; those were cold and filled with some other unreadable expression. "You get to see first hand, the greed and evils of our society, Sasuke. You will see why what we do here is necessary. If I could inflict the rite of Gudan on all our government officials, I would. Sinners…every last one of them."

It took me a second to realize the sudden dark drops, dripping onto the scroll, were actually _his blood_. He was digging his long fingernails. so hard into his palm, he was unaware of the pain he was inflicting on himself. His pale visage had become a hard, ugly mask that sent a shudder of revulsion (and perhaps a tiny sliver of fear) down my spine. This was a side of Orochimaru that was intimidating and frightening; the side of him that could crush those who opposed him without a second thought. It was this side of him that had stymied my plans to overthrow him over the years; the realization that even a slip of any plan I could conjure up, was the difference between life and death.

I did not want to die in vain.

_Coward. You are nothing but a coward. I bet if it was Uzumaki Naruto, he would have jumped up right now and stabbed Orochimaru with no questions asked. If it was -_

_Stop it!_ I hissed at the tiny voice that seemed to be growing louder and louder within me. Of all the names it had to throw at me, it had to be that damn murderer!

"What is the matter with you?" came the sudden question that had me looking up with mild alarm. Had he noticed my inner turmoil? Or was he able to read my intentions so blatantly these days? However, he only looked impatient; a silk handkerchief now cleaning up the mess he had created.

"I need…" I licked my lips and tried again as my voice had come out sounding raw and hoarse. "I need to start packing my things," I finished quietly. "Is there anything else you needed me for?"

Orochimaru raised a brow as if not believing my excuse for a second. All the same, he shrugged and waved me away with his non-bloodied hand. "You may leave. Fetch me Kimimaro once you are outside, will you?"

Nodding and giving a bow of farewell, I fled his presence before he could change his mind and want to query me a little more about my demeanor.

I walked blindly to my private quarters; hardly acknowledging any greetings from either officers or sinners as I passed them. My head was in a tizzy; and I needed my sanctuary to get away from it all. It had been a while since I had packed for a week-long stay at any place besides Byaku-Shinkyou. In fact, I can't remember the last time I stayed anywhere longer than two days outside of these walls.

"Are you okay, Sasuke-sama?" came the quiet but concerned question that jarred me from my thoughts.

Haku was in his usual 'welcome home' position – kneeling on the patio – as I walked up the small flight of steps leading into my bedroom.

"I'm fine," I muttered as I walked past him, kicked off my slippers and padded around the room in my socks with growing anxiety. I didn't even know where to begin with the packing. And western clothes? I don't think I've worn those since I was a child. I was more comfortable in traditional Japanese wear, and the idea of stomping around in a stuffy suit or a pair of jeans, did not sit too well with me.

"I'll get you some tea," Haku suggested when he realized I was close to having a mini nervous breakdown, but I stopped him with a firm hand on his wrist.

"I am traveling to Kyoto tomorrow with Orochimaru," I explained. "I need to pack some things…organize my affairs…urgh! I wish he had told me this earlier in the week! I would have had more time to get myself together."

"It's okay, Sasuke-sama," Haku encouraged with a smile. "I'll assist with the packing if you'd like. I'm usually good at that."

"I have to go with western clothes," I groaned; releasing him and flopping onto my back on the floor. "I don't even know where the hell those are." I honestly didn't. I think Asuma bought me a suit last year, but I doubted it still fit. I had grown a few inches since then.

Haku tried to stifle his giggle. Someone was clearly enjoying my distress. He slid open the door to my wardrobe, and we both looked at what was available in dismay. Kimonos, hakamas, yukatas, and of course my uniforms. The closest thing to western wear was a really old white tee shirt I rarely wore.

"Ah…this then," Haku cried out in delight as he finally noticed the protective clear wrap around an item of clothing that was hidden deep into the closet. He whipped it out and looked hopeful. It was indeed the black suit Asuma purchased for me last year.

"I'm not sure that will fit," I mumbled as I rose to my feet to accept the garment.

"You should still give it a try. I'd love to see the way you look in western clothing, Sasuke-sama."

I felt my cheeks burn with color at the earnest expression on his face, and I tried to scowl as if displeased with his attitude. What was the big deal about wearing a stupid suit anyway? Yet as I shooed him out of my room and began to undress, I did have to admit it was a little exciting to be 'different' once in a while.

One leg after the other, I slipped into the trousers and yanked it up to my waist – with a little hop. As I expected, it was a little high (I could see my ankles) but everything else seemed okay. The white silk shirt was a little snug around the chest – a sign that I had added a little more muscle weight in the past year, but I was still able to button and tuck it into the trousers with no problem. The jacket was the same…a little snug around the shoulders and upper arms, but manageable. While adjusting the cuffs, the ever impatient Haku slid open the door gently and poked his head in …with his eyes closed.

"Can I see you now, Sasuke-sama?"

I rolled my eyes and shrugged. "Fine. You can come in."

His gasp had me rubbing my hand down the suit in worry. Did I really look that ridiculous in this outfit? However, looking at him again, I was rewarded with a look that could only be described as idolatry worship. It made me extremely uncomfortable, and I wanted him to look away.

"I take it you approve?" I asked gruffly as I tugged down the sleeve of the jacket…something to keep my hands busy.

"Oh…yes…" came the slightly breathless response. "You really should wear these more oft -"

"Knock, knock?" came the loud sing-song voice that could only belong to one person; a person I really did not want to see. "Are you decent, Sasuke-chan?"

I growled beneath my breath, and would have hurried off to change back to my uniform, but Kimimaro was already making his way into my room with a low whistle at the sight of me.

"My, my, my. Don't we look dashing this evening? What's the occasion?"

"Sasuke-sama is traveling with Lord Orochimaru tomorrow," Haku the Parrot quipped before I could stop him. He really was getting lax (or I was the one being more lenient because of …well…that thing with Zabuza) these days. "He has no other western clothes though."

"Lucky for you, that's why I'm here," Kimimaro said with a chuckle. "I had to remind Lord Orochimaru that you might have nothing to travel with, and I doubt sitting on a train for a whole day in that suit is going to be conducive, so…" He held out a small black carryall. "I am lending you a few of my old clothes. They should fit with no problems."

I stared at the bag; wondering if I ought to accept his offer. Knowing Kimimaro, his offer of goodwill wouldn't come without a price. I wonder if it meant having to do something menial for him in the future.

"Thank…you…" I finally grated out as I accepted the bag.

"Don't have to sound like you're getting your teeth pulled," the older man said with a smirk. "Go on…try some of them and let's see."

"I am not hosting a damn fashion show for you two," I argued, but Kimimaro was ignoring me and making himself comfortable beside Haku. I watched him smile warmly at the younger man before reaching out to pet his head…like my father used to do when I was little. It was only brief, but the sudden recollection of such a tender moment had me turning away to wrest the zipper open with more force than necessary.

What was the point of bringing up the past? I only had my future to look forward to, and in this case, a future where I was about to exposed to the real world; where darkness and evils beckoned and a million sinners' cries went unheeded.

* * *

><p>I hated to admit that Kimimaro was a life-saver, but he really was. Thanks to his thoughtfulness, I was snug and warm in a pair of his jeans, a black turtleneck sweater and matching black wool coat; accessorized with my pair of boots (very important when patrolling the town during the winter months).<p>

We left Byaku-Shinkyou at about five in the (very nippy) morning, and it had taken me an extra half an hour of dealing with Haku's moping about me not taking him for the trip. I explained a thousand times over that it was Orochimaru's decision, and short of him throwing a tantrum, he finally settled for nodding and accepting the situation. He did wish me a good trip and made me promise that I'd be extremely careful in whatever I was doing. I had thought this request odd, but did not bring it up and only put it to Haku's caring and worry-wart nature. All the same, I had taken Asuma's charm with me, and had it tucked within the inner pocket of the coat.

With only Kimimaro as Orochimaru's companion – someone had to keep his bed warm at night, I guess – the three of us were driven out of the compound by one of his private coupes and to the train station. They were apparently expecting us, because we were ushered straight to the first class carriage (about three cabins in all); which Orochimaru had rented out exclusively for himself. For a man planning to spend only a week (or less), watching the long line of expensive designer luggage being wheeled into the carriage was embarrassing to say the least. Compared to my pitiful carryall and backpack, it felt like I was nothing more than a servant to his highness – the King of Perversion.

I was glad when the train finally left the station and he left me alone in my section of the cabin. Still it wasn't hard to overhear the hushed and muted whispers between he and Kimimaro in the next cabin. As I struggled to read my passages from the Great Book, all I could hear were breathless giggles…soft moans…a groan or two…silence…and then the wet sounds of something…before the steady, low rhythmic creaking sound that had me slamming my book shut and stomping toward the furthest end of the cabin in disgust and frustration.

I mean, we were barely half-an-hour into the fucking trip! Couldn't they give it a rest for that long?

I curled up against the window and tried to force myself to continue reading, but I realized it was going to be pointless. I couldn't concentrate, and I realized now…as I glanced around me and at the other empty seats …how _alone_ I was. I was by myself, traveling to a city I had never been and unsure of what I was to see and experience. Though I had taken the bus rides to pick up sinners in the past, at least they were _others_ around me and it wasn't so damn depressing. I wished Haku was with me; at least he could talk off my ear while I read or kept me company with just his presence. Hell, even Asuma – who hadn't seen me off, much to my disappointment – would have been a welcome companion.

_And since when did you care about having a companion?_

I snorted at my inner voice and closed my eyes; my head resting against the cool window pane as the landscape raced by. I tried to recall the last train ride I had taken. I must have been five years old at the time…traveling to Osaka to visit relatives with Mother and Itachi…and…

_Wha…?_

I was back in that stuffy, cramped bus from Toshu-gu. I sat up with a jerk and blinked rapidly; wondering if I would return back to the posh, empty first class cabin on the train. But no…I was still on the bus…and though I was surrounded by sinners, neither of them made a sound. They sat like mannequins in their drab gray yukatas; features expressionless as they stared before them blindly. It was as if the world had been eradicated of its color, and I was all alone within a sea of motionless humanity. A sudden, intense feeling of claustrophobia had me wanting to scream in panic. I wanted to get off this bus; to go back to my refuge in Byaku-Shinkyou, where I could find myself again. Breathing heavily, I tried to get off my seat, when I saw it…no…_him_…before me…at least the back of his head.

The golden locks stood out in sharp contrast to the gray, and for some inexplicable reason, I felt something melt away within my chest; a sensation of weightlessness; of having some kind of burden dropped at an alarming rate. I parted my lips to call out his name, and I was sure I was calling out his name, but…I could not hear my voice, and I knew he couldn't hear me either because the bus came to a quick stop and he was the only one getting off his seat.

_Don't leave me here,_ I found myself begging feverishly. _Don't you dare leave me here! Look at me! Please look at me!_

I was completely and utterly ignored.

Without looking back, he stepped off with a wave of his hand over his head in farewell, and as I pressed my face against the grimy glass to see his destination, I could see nothing but a cloud of absolute darkness approaching him. It was the kind of black where not even a pinpoint of light could prick through, and as I watched him vanish slowly before my eyes; I felt the burning sting of tears forming.

_I made him get off the bus. It's all my fault…all my fault…all my fault…all my…_

"…suke? Sasuke?"

I gasped and sat up; eyes widened as I looked into the face of a bemused Kimimaro. He had been shaking my shoulder, and now dressed in a black smoking jacket…and not much else, his flushed visage was another sign of what must have transpired in the private cabin with his master.

I shuddered and shrank away from his touch.

"Are you okay?" he asked. "Looks like you were having a nightmare."

He motioned toward his eyes and wiped it away. I was confused at what he was doing, before the first taste of salt on my lips told me that I was the one who had to do the wiping.

_Crying? _Me, _crying_? What the fuck was wrong with me? I could honestly say it has been years since I shed a tear for anything. This really was embarrassing and so unlike me. Angry at myself for showing such weakness, I wiped my face with the sleeves of my sweater; before glaring at him and daring him to even mention this to his lover. He must have realized what I was saying with my expression, because he only shrugged and gave a weak smile.

"Hungry?" he asked in an effort to change the subject. "The stewardesses dropped off brunch, but you were sleeping."

I watched him wheel the trolley toward me, and though – on any other day – I would have ignored his offer, I felt too drained to resist or put up my guard. I ate with him in silence (I could have been eating sand for all the taste on my tongue) while listening to him ramble about the last time he went to Kyoto and how much I'd enjoy the place. Unfortunately, all I could see and think about was my dream (nightmare) and how real it had felt.

It was clear as to what the dream was implying, and it only brought to light the many other lives I had condemned over the years. I was torn; literally felt like I was being ripped in half. I did not understand why his sin should be the moral compass to leave me in such disarray. He had murdered someone for crying out loud. He did deserve what was coming to him, and yet a small part was slowly realizing what I was loathe to admit.

I _wanted_ to see that warm smile again. I _wanted_ to see those blue eyes not trained on me with hatred, but with that friendly light, which had irritated me (at the time) with how…_nice_ it felt.

However, I knew I was asking for the impossible. We both knew such a thing was never going to happen, so what was the point dwelling on it? He hated me, and I felt the same for him. And that was all there was to that.

Orochimaru later joined us; looking refreshed and invigorated from his 'escapades' and sleep. I pretended to be reading as he and Kimimaro discussed some things out of earshot. I knew they wouldn't appreciate me eavesdropping; though I was more than curious to know more about this trip besides having to see the sinners of government at work. I slept a few more times, but luckily did not have any troubling dreams. Sometime in the evening, the scenery had changed to reveal a landscape that was familiar and yet not familiar. I could make out towering palaces reminiscent of the Heian to Meiji era nestled amongst the hills and surrounded by lakes (either man made or natural). Despite the hints of the old country, modernization had taken its toll on the city as well; for there were many skyscrapers, lit streets and neon signs we bypassed. Considering I had lived a relatively sheltered life for almost fourteen years, and the only excuses I had for traveling was simply to go to bus stations to pick up sinners - being a part of the city life was a little overwhelming.

Our journey came to an end around two in the morning, where a black Mercedes Benz (the latest model) with a uniformed chauffeur and a bespectacled man in a business suit was expecting us at the station. Orochimaru's luggage would arrive in a separate van, and as we made ourselves comfortable in the backseat (luckily I was spared the agony of sitting right next to Orochimaru), the bespectacled man introduced himself as Torune – Councilman Danzo's private secretary.

"The councilman is honored you accepted his invitation, Lord Orochimaru," Torune was saying. He was in the front seat and had to turn his head a little to address us. "He insists that you spend the time enjoying your stay in this fine city before the meeting tomorrow night."

Orochimaru gave a non-committal grunt, and a quick glance at him revealed his gaze was trained out the window; his features expressionless. It was as if he didn't really give a damn whatever Torune had to say. Kimimaro – who was dressed in a casual suit as well – also had the same stone-faced expression. My apprehension was growing. If Orochimaru hated coming here so much…why make the trip in the first place?

"And here we are," Torune said as we pulled up to an elegant traditional townhouse. Despite it being smack dab in the middle of the city, it had been constructed in such a way to give the illusion of actually being in the countryside.

"Everything has been arranged as you requested," Torune continued with a polite bow as Orochimaru strutted past him without a second glance. The poor guy seemed to hold his breath as Orochimaru inspected every single thing with his critical eye, and I had to say that the rooms were spotless and as exquisite as a man befitting his status. There were only four servants – two male and two female (shocking I know), but the female attendants were for my benefit apparently, and they were quite eager to show me my living quarters.

"We hope everything is to Sasuke-sama's liking," the older of the two said as she bowed her head to the tatami mat.

I couldn't complain. The room was done in muted browns and creams with the familiar natural materials that made up the rooms in Byaku-Shinkyou. A futon had already been set for me with what looked like the softest white cotton sheets ever. Two sturdy Japanese lanterns illuminated the room, and there was a low-writing desk with chairs in a corner; right next to the alcove where two decorative samurai swords sat silently. There was a screen door leading to the private baths, and I was already dreaming of soaking in the tub when this was all over. I felt filthy.

"Would Sasuke-sama like some assistance in getting ready for bed?"

"We can help run your bath and wash your back if you want."

_Huh? _

I spun around – so lost in my examination of the room that I had completely forgotten the women were still here. They were still on their knees; dressed in light kimonos that accentuated their curves with every movement. They couldn't have been any older than twenty, and it was embarrassing to have them looking as if they wanted to eat me alive. I shuddered and shook my head in polite refusal.

"I can take care of myself. Thank you."

The older one tried to mask her disappointment. "If Sasuke-sama ever needs us for anything, just press the little button at the side of the wall there, and we'll be at your beck and call."

Thanking her again, I waited until they had bowed themselves out before I could breathe freely. Please do not assume that I am completely averse to women. I do not hate them or dislike them, but it's been so long since I've actually sat or been in a room with any of them for longer than ten minutes, it makes me anxious and uncomfortable. Women could be intimidating and overpowering with their very presence. Perhaps that was why Orochimaru didn't want them around.

For what it's worth, I ended up sleeping like a baby. I had fully expected to have a restless night, but I must have been more exhausted than I thought. After a quick bath and my early morning prayers, one of the girls – the younger one – served me breakfast. Without her older companion, I was able to examine her mannerisms a little more carefully. She seemed more deliberate with her actions; slower as she would move the tray – as if hoping the items wouldn't spill – or the way she'd pour out the tea (her hands would tremble a little). I could be wrong, but I had an inkling she was new to this stewardess business. Could it be that she was one of those girls who had to sell their bodies for money to pay off some debt?

However, it was when she turned toward the window, and the first filter of sunlight drifted through the wooden slats, did I finally notice it. It was something that had eluded me last night since she had kept her gaze down for most of the time.

Her _eyes_. They were…_blue!_

A rarity like the sinner back in Byaku-Shinkyou and yet here was another one before me with the very same eye color. Which could only mean …?

"Take it off," I commanded quietly.

Her eyes widened in shock, and I kicked myself inwardly for how my order had sounded. The girl must have assumed I wanted to do something to her body…the furthest thing from my mind this early in the morning. I shook my head and clarified by nodding towards her head.

"That rug on your head," I stated plainly. "Take it off and show me what's beneath."

She still looked panicked and distressed, but with hands that were literally shaking now and her gaze lowered to the tatami mat, she did as she was told. The black wig came off effortlessly to reveal the tightly bunched thick blond hair beneath. She bit her lower lip; clutching the wig tightly on her lap as she continued to stare at the floor. I could see the tears welling in her eyes; a sign she was struggling to hold back whatever shame I had caused her.

"You can put it back on," I said with what I hoped was a non-threatening voice. "I just wanted to clarify my suspicions that's all."

This time, when she did look up, I could have sworn there was something else besides panic in those eyes. It was a dark expression that disappeared as quickly as it appeared. All the same, she put the wig back on and seemed to breathe a little easier.

"You are not who you claim to be, are you?" I prodded; now reluctantly intrigued by whatever back story she had. Was she a runaway? Was she someone in trouble with the law? Did she know who we were and that's why she had to hide her identity?

She stubbornly remained mute and continued to study the mats. I sighed and did my best to control my temper. "Well? Are you going to tell me your real name or not?"

"E…E…"

I strained to hear her whispered words, wishing she'd speak up for goodness sakes.

"E…noh…" she finally got out, just as the screen door opened to reveal her older companion. The new presence broke the spell, and 'Enoh' or whatever she called herself, was back to playing second fiddle as she allowed the other woman to take over the reigns.

By mid-morning, I found myself in a car heading toward the over-commercialized Christmas shopping district with Kimimaro for company. According to his orders, Orochimaru expected me to be dressed impeccably for the dinner meeting tonight with the councilman, hence I needed to be outfitted in a good evening suit. By the time we had visited about five different stores, I had a feeling the white-haired man had missed his calling. He was the consummate fashionista; able to point out what worked and didn't work with my hair or my eyes or my build, and it was one parading of outfits after another until I was ready to rip my hair out (and never listen to another _Jingle Bell _being sung for as long as I live). Not that he gave a shit about my distress.

A typical Kimimaro assessment at a store.

"Try the black shirt."

Five minutes later. "No. Too blah. How about this one?"

Five minutes later. "Too…meh. It doesn't bring out your eyes. Try this one."

He literally drove the salespeople nuts, and all the while sitting comfortably in his chair, legs crossed, sipping from a flute of champagne, while waving his hands up and down and sideways as he pointed out what outfits he wanted me dressed in and what he didn't want to see me in. I guess Orochimaru must have given him an unlimited amount of cash to squander.

"I thought we were only going to buy one suit," I finally grumbled as we left our sixth designer store with five large shopping bags to add to the ten or more already loaded in the rented Benz.

"You can never have enough clothes, Sasuke my dear," came the flippant comment that pretty much summed up the rest of my day.

It was during lunch, at some fancy restaurant, that he nearly had a fit of epic proportions. "I almost forgot," he gasped, while staring at me…well my head to be more specific. "You have _got_ to get a haircut."

I blinked and eyed the long bangs on either side of my face. What was wrong with my hair? I would have asked that aloud, but Kimimaro was already rambling on about what kind of hairstyle I could get that would fit my features. I hated to point out to him that his ponytails and zigzag parting weren't exactly fashion-forward, but I knew he wouldn't pay any attention to me. However, my shame came full circle when two flamboyant men walked past our table, only for one of them to stop and smile at us with an expression that I was all too familiar with.

"You two make a delicious couple," he breathed with a giggle. "I am sooooo jealous."

His partner apologized for the comment, though both still stole hungry glances of us as they left the restaurant.

I wanted to die.

Kimimaro, on the other hand, burst into loud laughter that even my glare couldn't control. "Well, how about it, Sasuke?" he drawled lazily with a playful wink. "Don't you think we'd make a delicious couple? I could teach you a few things here and …urk!"

I had tossed a grape in his direction; more at his forehead, but somehow it landed into his mouth and the poor guy was now gasping for breath. It took one of the maitre'd's available to perform the Heimlich maneuver, which sent the grape flying across the room and into someone's soup. Well, that caused another mini-disaster.

Bottom line, the haircut idea was discarded.

"You almost killed me!" he bitched on the drive back to our rented home. "I can't believe you'd do that after all I've done for you today."

"I said I was sorry," I replied for the one-millionth time. "I didn't think it would enter your mouth. I was aiming for your enormous forehead."

"Haha. Funny," he grumbled, and proceeded to stomp to he and Orochimaru's wing of the house, leaving me to deal with all the bags of clothes (half of which I was sure I would never wear in this lifetime). Luckily 'Enoh' showed up to assist me, but I was too exhausted from the day to be bothered dealing with her quiet and secretive nature. I let her do whatever the hell she wanted before passing out on my futon in weariness. Fortunately, I did manage to get at least an hour of sleep before a loud knocking on my door signaled that our dinner date with the councilman was to begin.

After about five minutes of deliberation, I settled for the black double-breasted tuxedo, the black trousers with the silk stripe on the side, a white silk shirt, and a black bow tie. The gold cufflinks were an 'extra' gift from Kimimaro, and as I tied up my patent leather shoes and made sure my black cummerbund wasn't going to fall off as I walked, I stepped back to examine the 'finished product' in the mirror. I looked like a completely different person, and I wasn't sure I liked the change. Sighing softly, I reached for the white handkerchief, and folding it into fours like the salesperson had taught me, I tucked into the breast pocket and nodded in muted satisfaction.

The 'new and improved' Uchiha Sasuke was finally ready for his public debut.

* * *

><p><em>Enoh: <em>

From her hiding place behind the clump of bushes, vines, and trees within the large compound, she watched them step out of the main house, and toward the waiting vehicle. She clutched a branch tightly as the young master stepped into the glow from a street lamp; his handsome visage stoic yet strained as he followed Lord Orochimaru and Kimimaro. From the moment she had laid eyes on him, she agreed that the pictures did not do him justice at all. In person, Lord Sasuke was even more intoxicating, powerful, potent, and he didn't even know it.

His voice made her heart skip a beat, and when he had ordered her to 'take it off', she had to admit that her initial thoughts had run amok at the possibilities of bedding him. She might have resisted…for the first five minutes before eventually giving in. It was just a damn pity Kaname-san always managed to poke her nose in when she was least expected. Last night all she had done was brag and yak about how the young master had stared at her the longest, and how he had clearly wanted to be with her, but he was just too shy to admit it.

_Whatever._

She waited until the Benz was completely out of sight, before hiking up the skirt of her kimono and tiptoeing quickly across the compound toward the security station. She knew she had only a small window of time to get her task done or Kaname-san was bound to start asking questions. As she approached the small, one-room building, she gave a quick nod to the guard who only tipped his hat in acknowledgement before stepping aside as if excusing himself and not seeing her at all.

She shut the door behind her quietly and picked up the phone to dial the numbers she had memorized to heart. It was picked up almost as soon as she was done dialing.

"Any move?" came the sonorous voice at the other end.

"They've just left for the banquet," she replied; the shy whisper used all day disappearing to reveal the strong, confident voice of a woman who knew exactly what she was doing. "Sasuke-sama was with them."

"I see." There was a pause of a heartbeat. "This means there's a change in plans. The bastard is smarter than we give him credit for."

"No go with the original?"

"We cannot risk hurting the young master. He is the key to all this, remember?"

"Yes, sir," she replied humbly for the voice had risen sharply in disdain.

"Remember to keep your eyes open, Ino."

"I understand."

The click signaled the end of the conversation, and she hung up the device with an expel of breath. A quick motion outside the window had her looking up. It was the guard who was giving the sign that there was someone coming. Nodding in understanding, she slipped out of the building as quickly and quietly as she had gone in; only to blend into the shadows with barely a sound.

She had a role to play, and she would keep her end of the bargain until their best laid plans was finally rewarded with success.

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke: <em>

"If you weren't such a stuck up pain in the ass, I'd have a good mind of taking you back to my bedroom and having my way with you," Orochimaru drawled as he just about raped me with those eyes of his. I tried to smile, but couldn't quite manage it. I wasn't sure if I ought to thank him for the roundabout compliment or not.

Though he had insisted it was going to be a black-tie event, Orochimaru danced to the beat of his own drum; hence he had chosen to wear a white silk embroidered mandarin jacket and matching pants. He had let his hair down tonight – literally. For that long flowing black mane seemed to glow a dark sheen of blue beneath the light as he moved. He looked even paler tonight, having applied even more of his makeup to hide the lines of age I'm sure. His golden staff/walking stick shaped like a serpent was also an accessory he banged on the floor as he walked. Kimimaro was dressed like me, only his tuxedo was white. The fact that his hair was in the same shade made him stand out like an angel (or ghost) in the sea of people we were now making our way towards.

When he had mentioned 'dinner date' with the council man, I had assumed we were going to his home for a private affair.

So much for that.

This 'date' was being held in one of the premier hotels in the city, and it was clear that the who's who of Japanese politics and entertainment were in attendance tonight. Men dressed to the nines in their evening suits and women dazzling in ball gowns and jewelry that must have cost a fortune.

The thick stench of greed, envy, vanity, and pride made me want to vomit.

_And why are my eyes beginning to water?_

I winced at the flashbulbs from the cameras going off as we made our way into the lobby, and there was no doubt that the three of us were getting the most curious looks. No thanks to Orochimaru I'm sure.

However, it wasn't until I passed a few people did I overhear their hushed and excited whispers:

"It's him, isn't it?"

"Looks so much like his father."

"It's the Uchiha boy."

"Heard he was the lone survivor of the uprising."

"The poor dear. I feel so sorry for him."

"He's the sole heir to the Uchiha fortune, I hear."

"Amazing. He's grown so much since we last saw him."

"I wonder if he's looking for a bride…"

_Are you fucking kidding me?_

"Now remember, Sasuke. I need your _eyes_ tonight," came the husky words breathed into my ear. "Keep a note of the names of the men who will be introduced to you and note the depths of their sins. I need to know those I can trust and those who are not worth my time. Can you do that for me?"

Of course. I knew I hadn't been invited to Kyoto for just any ordinary 'sightseeing'. What good was I for besides being his 'spy'?

"Yes," I replied quietly.

"Good boy. Ah…here he comes now," Orochimaru muttered as I noticed the sea of people parting to make way for the stately man walking toward us slowly with the aid of a walking cane. Dressed in a generic black tuxedo, he had a black patch over his left eye, but from the hard lines on his face, it was clear he was a man who had seen hardships in his life and had conquered them all.

Shimura Danzo – acting head of the entire Police Force in the country. You could consider him the public face of the watchdogs, while Orochimaru worked in the shadows. It was a partnership that seemed to fit them both.

"Welcome, welcome, welcome!" Danzo greeted as he held out his arms as if to give Orochimaru a hug. "We are humbled by your presence, Lord Orochimaru."

Instead of a hug, they settled for firm handshakes as the cameras went off and the guests began to applaud. I watched Orochimaru switch into 'people' mode; which meant the anti-social psychopath had been tossed aside to reveal this smiling, oh-gosh-you personality which had them falling hard and fast into the web of lies he was spinning.

Almost immediately, I felt a burning sensation in my eyes; like suddenly being stabbed with needles continuously. The sensation got worse whenever I looked in the direction of Danzo and the important-looking men surrounding both he and Orochimaru. It wasn't hard to see the reason why. I could _see_ it all; the aura of _blackness_ that cocooned each of them like a second skin; none more so than Shimura Danzo.

/ You get to see first hand, the greed and evils of our society, Sasuke. You will see why what we do here is necessary. If I could inflict the rite of Gudan on all our government officials, I would. Sinners…every last one of them. /

So Orochimaru hadn't been lying. It was as if he had chosen to wear the white suit for a reason. It was to make those evil ones more evident against the unblemished color of his being. I wanted to gorge my eyes out; to rip them out of their sockets and to remain blind. I could barely breathe.

"Easy now, Sasuke," Kimimaro whispered into my ear with a reassuring hand on my shoulder. "You're beginning to look anxious. I know it's overwhelming, but bear with it for a little while."

Bear with it? _Bear with it?_ I could hardly see!

"And this is Little Sasuke? Hardly little anymore, are you?" came the jovial cry from a portly man, whose jowls seemed to dance with every motion of his lips. "Don't you remember me? I used to work with your father in the Ministry of Defense."

_Ministry of Defense…my father…those documents Orochimaru was reading…I don't…understand…_

"Of course he can't remember such things," another man said. This one was skinny but still as wrinkled and ancient. "I'll bet he remembers me. Uncle Gozu. Your father and I were quite close back in our academy days. In fact, I remember the time when -"

"No, no, your father and I were in the same business together. You remember me surely, Sasuke-kun?"

They were all beginning to crowd me, and I wanted to escape…to get away from it all. I didn't belong here. Who were this people? Why did they want me? What did they want with me? I wanted to get back to my safe haven; my cocoon – back to Byaku-Shinkyou, where I belonged. Modern society and its eccentricities frightened me, terrified me with its inherent evil and greed. These men did not care about anything but what they could benefit from their positions of power. I wanted…I needed…

…_get out of here!_

"Let the young man get some air," came the voice of reason as Danzo broke through the throng of men to grasp my wrist protectively. "Here, have a drink, Sasuke. Looks like you need it."

I accepted the flute of what I hoped was non-alcoholic beverage, but a sip told me otherwise. I had vowed to abhor alcohol after my month with the priests, and yet here I was breaking that promise. All the same, the rich smooth taste did ease my anxiety a little, and as I glanced over my shoulder, I could make out Kimimaro leaning against a wall with a hand in pocket and the other cradling a flute raised in a toast to me. Orochimaru was engaged in conversation with a group of men and women, but did find the time to glance my way; a dark and unreadable expression in his eyes before forcing himself back to the conversation at hand.

"Here we are," Danzo was saying as he pushed open a set of doors leading out to the balcony. There was another couple out here, but they were not close enough to be a bother. Grateful for the fresh air, I squeezed my eyes shut for a second; allowed the wave of vertigo to stop making me feel nauseated, before lifting my lashes to look at the Kyoto skyline at night. Like a million colorful fireflies, one could almost consider it urban beauty.

At least my eyes had stopped burning, so that felt better.

"It is a beautiful city indeed," Danzo was saying; reminding me that I was not alone. He tapped his walking stick on the ground and smiled at me.

"It's been a while now, hasn't it? When I last saw you, you were about this high." He pointed toward his chest. I was now taller than him by about an inch. I wasn't sure if I was supposed to say anything, so I settled for a low 'yeah' in agreement and took another swig. Whatever was in this drink, I was really beginning to like it. I was beginning to feel pleasurably numb all over.

"It's a pity you have to remain stuck behind the walls of Byaku-Shinkyou, when there's a whole world out here just waiting to be explored."

I shrugged and eyed the bubbles forming at the sides of the flute. "I like Byaku-Shinkyou."

"As you well should, since it belongs to your family…your inheritance."

There was something in his voice that made me look up, and again I was immediately assaulted by the evil around him. I decided to focus my attention on an area above his head instead of looking directly at his face. It felt like my eyes would begin bleeding soon if I kept this up.

"Would you mind if I did something, Sasuke?"

"Hmm?"

"It won't be but a second of your time."

_Huh?_

A smile was thrown my way before he snapped his fingers and two men – from seemingly nowhere – appeared to begin patting me down. I would have protested the invasion of my personal space, but I was still a little buzzed and besides these men were damn quick with whatever they were doing. I watched in bemusement as one of them handed something to Danzo. Whatever it was, was so small I could barely see it, but it must have been enough for Danzo to give a grunt and nod as if it was to be expected. He squeezed his hand tightly and I think I heard the crush of something, but I must have been hearing things.

"Now I can speak to you freely," he stated as the two men vanished as quickly as they appeared.

Stranger and stranger.

Danzo walked to the railings to look out to the city, and began to tap his walking stick on the ground in a rhythmic pattern. "As you well know, Sasuke, Byaku-Shinkyou has been run by Orochimaru since the unfortunate demise of your family. As you also know your father was the Commissioner General – a role which I unfortunately have today – in other words, he oversaw everything that involved law enforcement in this country. It's a role that has always been under the name of the Uchiha, and it is my wish that someday you will take over the reigns when my time is up."

What the hell is he talking about?

"Unfortunately, Orochimaru has deemed it fit to control the role of the watchdogs from Byaku-Shinkyou instead of the other way around." At this point, Danzo had moved away from the railings and was now walking toward me; a fever in his eyes that I could not bear to look at. He was suffocating me. "Orochimaru assumes he can take control of the entire watchdogs and is not simply satisfied with being a 'hidden' figure. He wishes to take his insane doctrines to the extreme and we _cannot_ allow that to happen."

"…doesn't he fund your office, Councilman?" I drawled with a small smirk. "You are talking big for someone who keeps crawling to him to help finance your re-election. Should you be saying such things about him behind his back?"

His lips tightened in distaste. "Orochimaru is full of greed and will stop at nothing until he is in total and complete control of _everything_. He will not hesitate to remove you from the picture, just as he planned and orchestrated that up -"

"Ah, so this is where you two ran off to," came the familiar voice of Orochimaru as he all but burst through the doors and stepped out to the balcony with Kimimaro in tow…and a few other politicians hanging onto his coattails.

Orochimaru moved closer to me; a hand reaching out to caress my neck gently. Though he was smiling, I could see that his eyes spoke volumes. He was clearly not pleased about something.

"And what were you two talking about without us, eh?"

This brought some laughter from the vultures and I could feel his caress getting a little harder. He was just about squeezing my neck.

"The political climate, Orochimaru," Danzo replied with a tight smile as well. I was beginning to think there was no love lost between these two, and what was that he was saying about Orochimaru orchestrating and planning an up…? Up what?

"The recent attacks on police stations around the country hasn't escaped you, has it?" Danzo continued.

Recent attacks on police stations? Why hadn't I heard of this before?

"Indeed," Orochimaru stated loudly and for the benefit of his now rapt audience. "We have heard of these despicable acts, and you can be rest assured that the sinners who have committed such treason will have their sins purged the only way we know how."

"How's that?" a politician asked. "What can you do to stop these terrorists?"

Orochimaru smiled. "Why the spiritual ritual of Gudan. The cleansing of the corrupted spirit and soul from this earth where they will be taken to the heavens."

"Didn't I hear it was basically a beheading?" someone muttered, which caused a murmur of conversation among the crowd. Inside, I squirmed in discomfort.

"A beheading…yes…" Orochimaru agreed with an indulgent nod. "But we do not just chop off heads for fun. It is all done with prayers and the most ancient of purification rites observed."

"I've been to one of those things," a politician admitted. I couldn't really see him from here, but it sounded like the fat man with the jowls. "They aren't really exciting. I mean, we just see the sinners brought out and then you mutter your prayers and wham, they get killed off."

"We demand they suffer a little more," a woman cried out shrilly, and a chorus of 'yes! yes! yes!" was taken up by the blood-thirsty crowd. My eyes began to burn again; forcing me to lower my gaze to the ground.

"With all the sinners being sent to Byaku-Shinkyou recently," some other politician rambled. "Many of whom were connected to the loss of over a hundred brave and patriotic officers all over the country, I think it's fair that we get to see them tortured for much longer than five minutes of prayer and then a beheading."

"Hear! Hear!" they cried out.

"So what do you suggest?" Orochimaru asked; his voice filled with dark amusement. He directed this to Danzo who had been quiet all this time. "How else can we appease you, my lords and ladies?"

"Let them fight to the death," Danzo stated firmly. Even I had to look up at this declaration. Just what the hell was he suggesting?

"I say that all the sinners to be beheaded on that day be put into a death match. Let it become a survival of the fittest with some rouse that whoever wins gets his freedom. Then…the winner of the death match gets to face your strongest fighter or officer. If he manages to beat …or kill…said officer in a battle…he deserves his freedom, don't you all agree?"

The audience nodded here and there, many murmuring their agreements. I glanced at Orochimaru in disbelief. He couldn't possibly go with this, would he? It was against the rite of Gudan. It was to be a 'clean' (albeit bloody) rite of passage. Agreeing to this death match was going too far.

"Orochimaru…" I began, but he squeezed my neck hard, and I could see in his eyes; a gleam of excitement that sent chills of concern and trepidation down my spine. He really was going through with this. He was really going to –

"I accept your offer," he said aloud with a firm tap of his walking stick on the ground as if to silence them. "The sinners will fight to the death, and to sweeten the pot or make the stakes even higher, I know just who will be the final officer they'll have to face."

"Oh?" Danzo asked with a raised brow. "And who is this officer willing to offer himself for the cause?"

Fully expecting it to be Kimimaro – since he was stronger than me (and I didn't mind him getting killed by an overzealous sinner) – I felt my stomach drop as I was suddenly pushed forward a little.

"Why the very heir of the Byaku-Shinkyou," came the loud cackle of declaration that elicited stunned silence at first. "Whoever survives the death match will face Uchiha Sasuke as his final ticket to the afterlife or to freedom. It should be a thrilling match, shouldn't it?"

There was another heartbeat of stupefied silence, before their cheers of agreement ricocheted like thunder. Unfortunately, it only felt like muted disembodied voices to me. I could only train my gaze to the ground; my hands forming tight fists, my stomach fluttering with mixed sensations of fever and ice as I realized just what Orochimaru had in store for me.

_And Danzo too. Both of them…both of them…are…are…_

"And to appease you even more," my tormentor continued with a slap of my shoulders. "What say we move the date of the festivities to the third week of the new year, hmm? Perfect time to usher in blessings with multiple cleansings, wouldn't you agree?"

Their blood-thirsty cheers made me want to vomit, but I could only hold it in and force myself to keep a neutral expression. Many of them promised to attend, with the hope that it would turn out to be a good show. I listened to Orochimaru shake hands and tell them all that they were welcome to Byaku-Shinkyou at anytime. In less than a few minutes, he had managed to turn my whole world upside down, and I was left trembling with the enormity of what changes had been made.

Of my _life_ suddenly being at stake.

In four weeks, the final rite of passage would officially begin. In four weeks, I would get to watch men resort to being beasts as they struggled for survival, and in less than four weeks, I would have to test my worth to Orochimaru and Shimura Danzo; two men who seemed to want to see me humiliated and destroyed in front of thousands.

The lying, conniving bastards!

_So be it,_ I thought angrily as I walked to the railings and glared at the twinkling skyline that now seemed to mock me. _I will show you both what I'm made of. You can count on it. _


	9. 09: Control

**Notes: **My sincere thanks as always to the lovely few who take the time to leave a comment on the chapter as you read. It's very much appreciated! Enjoy! Some violations ahead...

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 09: <strong>

**Control**

_there is no freedom  
>escaping from my cocoon<br>I must seek you once again  
>I am drawn to you<br>like a moth to a candle  
>circling nearer and nearer<br>the deadly flame calls  
>now my wings are scorched<br>why must my nature be so?_

_- Teagan_

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke: <em>

The rest of the evening went in a poisoned blur. I remained, stubbornly, on the balcony though Orochimaru insisted I re-join the festivities inside. I knew my insubordination only made him furious, but in my current state of mind, I simply did not give a shit about his feelings. Had he spared a second considering _mine_ when he agreed to Danzo's ludicrous ideas? Had he considered what the consequences could be if things didn't turn out as they assumed it would? The last thing we needed was for the spiritual rite of Gudan to be sullied by something as menial as the sinners having to 'fight to survive'. What was the whole point then? We were simply letting them resort back to the crimes they were incarcerated with in the first place. It just made no sense to me that Orochimaru would agree to something like this.

"And just how long do you plan on remaining mute, Sasuke?" he asked impatiently as we sped down the highway and back to our rented home.

The farce of a dinner party was finally over, and I wanted nothing more than to find solace within my room and contemplate what steps I had to take next. I now had two targets to work with, and seeing to their deaths would involve some careful planning. Despite his conniving mannerisms, there were some things Danzo had revealed tonight; things that let me know that Orochimaru had _deliberately_ kept me in the dark all this time. Why? Did he feel that I was not worthy of being kept abreast of the most recent happenings? Or least things that related to the running of Byaku-Shinkyou? Did he really assume that I was that unreliable or could not be trusted?

"…so rude of you to deny the Chairman's daughter a dance when she requested it," the bastard was saying. Though my gaze was trained out the window, I could still see his reflection on the glass as he shook his head and tsked in disapproval. "In fact, your decision to sit outside like an obstinate little brat made us look incredibly bad tonight, Sasuke."

I caught his glare and curled my lip in a responding sneer of disdain. Like I give a fuck about your tarnished reputation.

"Are you honestly that concerned about the new rules?" he asked with a brow raised in what seemed like genuine confusion. "You make it seem as if you have no confidence in your abilities."

I felt the blood draining from my face at the insinuation. If he, for one minute, thought that I was _afraid_ of pitting my skills against any of those sinners…!

"There's a reason I agreed to Danzo's idiotic plan, Sasuke," Orochimaru continued with a low sigh as if trying to explain something so obvious to me. "He has got this notion in his head that you are not fit to run an organization as large and involved as Byaku-Shinkyou…"

/Orochimaru is full of greed and will stop at nothing until he is in total and complete control of _everything_. He will not hesitate to remove you from the picture…/

Danzo's words echoed hollowly in my mind, leaving me more confused as to what each man was trying to imply. Who was lying? Who was telling the truth? Who could I believe? Both men were obviously trying to mislead me, but…who? Who was the lesser of two evils?

"…and assumes that you are too weak…spineless…a coward," Orochimaru continued with a purse of his lips.

Why did I get the feeling he was insulting me as well?

"I agreed because I wanted it to be an opportunity for you to shine, Sasuke. Think about it, my stubborn little ward." He glanced at me; a small smile on his visage. "When you have destroyed the last sinner standing, your reputation in the eyes of Danzo and those greedy, blood-thirsty politicians, will be restored. You can then prove to them that you are worthy of carrying your family's long dynasty of protecting Japan as we know it."

He rubbed his chin in thought, his black polished fingernails gleaming in the muted darkness. "I might have to tweak things a bit, but I do insist that you battle whoever the last prisoner is. Even I must admit I'm curious to see how far you've come over the years. It's been a while since you've been in an actual fight, yes?"

The last 'actual fight' was with Kimimaro about two years ago at the dojo. Though Orochimaru had declared it was just to entertain some guests from Hong Kong, Kimimaro must have forgotten the memo because he just about nearly killed me during that 'spar' by going all out. My luck was that it hadn't been with real swords, but with wooden bokken, and _still_ he managed to have me bleeding and limping around by the time the match was over. It was an embarrassing loss, and his attempt to 'cheer me up' by saying I had done well and was getting stronger (I had only managed to graze his temple), did not make me feel any better. As long as he was around, I'd always be considered second best.

_As long as he's around, any chance of eliminating Orochimaru is next to impossible. _

"So consider it a personal challenge, eh?" Orochimaru quipped as if hoping to get me excited at the notion of me putting my life on the line to prove a point to him and his cohorts. "I am putting all my faith and trust in you, Sasuke. Make it a good show, eh?"

He dared to reach out to pat my shoulder indulgently, and on complete reflex, I slapped it and all but shoved him away with more force than necessary. Though he has touched me in the past (a pat on the head or an arm around my shoulder), I had never retaliated or acted in such a violent way before. It was obvious this did not sit too well with him; for his pale green eyes immediately became hard flints of fury and some other emotion I could define. Before I knew it, I felt my head whipping back and hitting the window with a low thud, before the pain eventually registered in my stunned mind.

He had _slapped_ my left cheek; so hard that the sensation of blood filling my mouth had me tasting it in disbelief. I couldn't remember the last time he had struck me, but it was enough to have my eyes stinging (not with tears of pain per se), but at how humiliating the admonishment felt. I could deal with being made to kneel before him for minutes on end, or have him insult me in a roundabout way, but there was something decidedly degrading in the way he had struck me. Something that made me feel even lower than the unpurified sinners bound for Gudan. In fact, now that I thought about it, it was the same kind of slap he usually gave to sinners when they appeared before him. Feeling my entire being burn at the knowledge, I could make out Kimimaro's gaze in the rear-view window (he was sitting in the front seat), and I wasn't sure if it was filled with pity or blasé. This did not make the situation any better.

"You really are an ungrateful child," Orochimaru rasped coldly beneath his breath. "After all I do and have done for you over the years, you keep treating me like I am nothing more than a hindrance. Gratitude and servitude should be a virtue, Uchiha Sasuke. I thought your precious Great Priests would have taught you that."

I grunted in surprise as he suddenly cupped my chin hard enough for me to feel his fingers digging into my jaw, forcing me to look at him. The pressure made my eyes water still, and I was aghast to find the tears rolling down my cheeks as he squeezed my chin a little harder.

"You break my heart so much, my dear boy," he drawled lazily; those hard flints of green changing hues to reflect his current state. He was getting aroused; a sick realization, but true all the same. It was obvious in his breathing, the way his pink tongue darted out to lick his thin lips, and the way his fingernail dipped into and caressed the blood that was dribbling down my chin. I tightened my hands into fists and tried to move away, but my body was in an awkward position anyway; half turned toward the window, and the other half turned toward him. I wanted to look away, but his eyes were hypnotic and –

_Resist. Resist. Resist!_

"Open them," he hissed when I had dared to squeeze my eyes shut. "Open them and see with those cursed eyes of yours."

I groaned at the added pressure to my jaw, my lashes fluttering weakly as I lifted them reluctantly. I was barely given a moment to understand just what was going on before I felt his tongue; that long appendage creating a wet, abrasive sensation against the corner of my mouth.

_Oh God! Oh God! Stop! Stop! Stop!_

He was _licking_ away my blood as if literally feasting and deriving nourishment from the dark liquid. I squeezed my eyes shut again and tried to control the uncontrollable wave of repulsion that hit me. I wanted to vomit all over him, but I was frozen…immobile…unable to breathe as he continued to assault me. In a desperate attempt to protect my sanity, I tried to 'get away' from the moment; to seek refuge in a place where I could pretend as if this wasn't happening to me. It was something I had adopted on the day my parents were killed; the way my mind had 'shut down' in an effort to pretend as if the sounds of gunshots and the hollow drips of my mother's blood was nothing more than a leaking pipe somewhere and firecrackers going off in celebration.

Praying Orochimaru wouldn't decide to go all the way, or that he would tire of trying to suck me dry, my short cry of helpless fury was masked below the low laughter that erupted from him. _I couldn't believe it_! Gasping in growing panic, he continued to squeeze that sensitive region between my legs; as if trying to shape my penis and balls to fit the curve of his large hand. It was shameful. It was terrible. I didn't want to believe this was happening, but…but…I was…

_(turned on)_

"Shit!" I breathed and finally forced my hands to wrap around his wrist in an effort to push his away from me. I was disgusted and yet my body seemed to have other plans of its own. It just wouldn't cooperate with me. He squeezed and rubbed…harder and faster, and the more I tried to stop myself from giving in, the worse it became. It was literally impossible to control myself. My penis was a hard rock within the restricting cloth of my underwear, and I wanted to die of mortification

_(and reluctant pleasure) _

"Sto…stop…" I begged feverishly as I lowered my head with a defeat that made my heart heavy with shame. "Please…I can't…"

"You can't what, Sasuke?" came the husky drawl against my ear. I shuddered at the feel of his tongue tracing it. "Can't believe you are actually this…_sensitive_? That your beautiful body was made for this, Sasuke? It's okay to give in, my dear. It's okay to reveal this side of you every once in a while…"

_No…no…nononononononononononononon…NO! I cannot give in like this! I just cannot..!_

"Come for me, Sasuke…"

_No…_

"Come for me…show me what lies beneath the icy layer…"

I moaned in desperation. "No…please…no…"

We both knew this was going to be a losing battle.

_Fu…fuck!_

My (intense) orgasm had me giving a choked sob before I forced myself to bite my lower lip to control my cry of completion. I could feel my sticky seed coating my underwear before seeping through my trousers to wet his sinful hand. My grip – still around his wrist – slackened as I fell back to the seat in miserable dismay. I was breathing heavily; trying to reorient myself back to the present, and how to eventually kill myself as he finally pulled away with a chuckle of victory.

"Now that was worth the wait," came the satisfied drawl. I could hear him licking his fingers, and I closed my eyes and turned away; as if hoping to crawl into the door (or open it and roll out to the road where I could be mercifully crushed by a passing car). It was one thing for Haku to elicit such a reaction from me during his massage, but a whole other experience to have this sick bastard finally violate me after all the years of meaningful looks, teasing, flirtatious comments and touches that repulsed me.

_Now_, abhorrent feelings had hit an all time low.

I needed to be _clean_…and fast. I needed something to cleanse me from his touches; something to give this whole unfortunate incident meaning. I loathed my own skin and wanted to literally rip it shreds.

"Your eyes are bloodshot," Orochimaru was saying as the car began to slow down. It was clear we were approaching the house, and I longed to make my escape. "Kimimaro be sure to administer the eye drops to Sasuke. The poor thing has had a very long night."

"Fuck you," I whispered angrily, but my words only did more to amuse him.

"Considering how breathtaking you looked when you came, my dear one, your righteous anger makes you even more delectable." He licked his lips again suggestively, and I turned away with a clenched fist. That vow I had once made to cut off his tongue? I'd shove the cut piece down his throat so he could have a taste of his own disgusting -

"Come on, Sasuke," Kimimaro's voice jarred me from my thoughts. The car had come to a stop and I hadn't even noticed. I stared – in embarrassment – at the wet dark patch between my legs. How the hell was I going to step out without the servants noticing or assuming I had soiled myself? However, Kimimaro – ever resourceful – gave a small smirk and wrapped his large coat around me.

"There you go. You should be fine now."

I ignored his patronizing tone and followed him to his private quarters – I had assumed he'd be in the same room with Orochimaru, but apparently not. I hovered at his doorway, wary of stepping all the way in for fear _he'd_ do the same thing to me.

"Just give it to me and I'll go," I stated quietly. I couldn't look him in the eye. I wanted to get away from anything connected to Orochimaru at this time. I needed to soak for the rest of the night in my bathtub and scrub away -

"Patience, patience," Kimimaro mumbled as he dug through his carryall. "I'm coming…"

A quick glance into the black bag showed it was filled with many other vials and bottles that were not all too surprising. It was another of Orochimaru's side hobbies; trying to find the cure to everything. He considered himself a man of science; one who explored the use of Nature's flora and the human body to find cures for anything and everything under the sun. Although I was yet to see his laboratory (he claimed he had one, so I just believed him), he had perfected these 'special' eye drops to be given to me whenever my eyes became too inflamed and painful.

The first time I complained about the pains was several weeks after the death of my family. I remembered telling Orochimaru about the sensation of tiny needles pricking the sensitive corneas, and he had only looked at me with a thoughtful expression on his visage.

"When does the pain happen, my dear one?"

_Whenever I look at you,_ I had begun to say, but I must have been smart enough at the time to realize it wasn't something he'd want to hear. So I settled for a "whenever I see bad people."

"Bad people, eh?" he had replied with a rub of his chin. "Does it hurt when you look at me then?"

I shook my head vehemently, but he had a brow raised in amusement. "Only a little," I finally admitted. Thinking he'd be upset with me, he had only laughed and rubbed my head gently.

"Not to worry, my little darling. I will prepare some medicine that will help to make your eyes feel so much better, okay?"

I was so relieved to hear about that, it did not occur to me to ask any questions about _where_ this miracle drug had come from or _what_ it entailed. Besides, I was only six-years-old at the time, what did I know? Orochimaru had become my new father, brother, and mother all in one. Whatever the hell he said, I lapped it up like the desperate kid I was.

True to his word, the medication was a godsend. His instructions had been to apply them three times a day for the first few weeks, which he assisted me with. The effect was immediate. Cool and soothing, the pain just about vanished within the hour. It was a damn miracle! However, years of diligent application seemed to 'numb' my eyes to certain situations. I could no longer sense any evil around Orochimaru, and within the walls of Byaku-Shinkyou, they appeared to adjust to the point where even staring at evil in the face wouldn't bother me so much.

However, tonight – being in a new environment – in such a concentrated cesspool of darkness…it had eventually taken its toll. My eyes were still stinging and Orochimaru's assault hadn't helped matters. I was this close to gorging my eyes out.

"You sure you don't want me to help you with it?" Kimimaro was saying as he held out the small brown vial to me. "I could -"

I snatched it away from him before he could finish and all but ran to my side of the house. As I slid the door to my room shut, my trembling hands almost found it difficult to open the top. If anyone had seen me in this state, they would have assumed I was a junkie desperate for his fix, but I couldn't help it. I _was_ desperate, and as I finally managed to get the required drops within my eyes…words could not express how much of a relief it was.

_He controls me…_

I gripped the small vial tightly in my fist; wanting to crush it to pieces, yet knowing I couldn't do without it.

_He controls me…_

In every little thing; from something as simple as eye drops to that humiliating experience in the car. With a small cry, I all but began to rip out of my tuxedo; flinging the cloth that now had the combined stench of his unique scent and the evidence of my weakness. Though my hands were still shaking, I somehow managed to get down to my underwear – and was about to take it off – when the sudden knock on my door had me freezing with hands on the hem of the cloth.

_Who the hell…? Oh God…no! Please no!_ Panic like wild fire had my brain burning at the notion that it could be Orochimaru returning to finish off what he started.

"Sasuke-sama?" came the timid call, I could barely hear, and even before I could tell whomever it was to wait, the shoji screen slid open quietly to reveal Enoh. "Sasuke-sama, I wanted to find out if…oh!"

Oh? _Oh?_ Was she really that incompetent that she couldn't understand when a man needed his privacy? Her expression of shocked surprise, the sight of a trembling hand moving to her mouth, and those blue eyes…

_(damn it!)_

…seemed to trigger off all the frustration and anger that had built up steadily all evening. With a growl that seemed to come from nowhere…

_(who are you becoming, Sasuke?)_

…I grabbed her wrist, all but dragged her further into the room and slid the door shut behind her with vehemence.

"Oh?" I grated coldly. "Did you come to laugh at me? Huh?"

She shook her head desperately. "I don't…I don't understand what you're talking about, Sasuke…argh!"

I flung her onto the futon which in turn made the cheap wig fly off her head to reveal the blond hair beneath. She tried to scramble off, but I was too fast for her. I straddled her body and gripped both wrists to pin her to the mattress so she couldn't move. Her eyes were as wide as saucers and the aura of fear that oozed off her made me feel…powerful…in control.

_(finally)_

I _wanted_ to be in control again. Orochimaru had stripped that away from me in the car, and now, with this timid woman at my mercy, I could do whatever the hell I wanted. I could perhaps take her and prove that I was not like Orochimaru; that I could enjoy the female flesh and be as 'normal' as the others.

"Please…" she was begging. "Don't do this, Sasuke-sam -"

"Shut up, you cheap whore." I ignored her gasp of pain at the insult. "Isn't that what you are?" I continued with a sneer as I released a wrist to cup her left breast. I squeezed and found myself enjoying her wince, though her hips did buck a little in response.

Hm. Interesting.

"You really do want this, don't you?" I growled and dug a knee between her thighs. Her low groan was enough to increase my disgust yet fascination with her reaction. It was clear she was afraid and yet her body seemed to want it. Was that really it then? Hadn't the great priests said it all with the body's ability to drift into temptation though the mind tried to resist?

_The sin of the flesh…_

I released her other wrist and slowly began to trace the outline of her shoulders…up to her slender, pale neck…

…_to eradicate the sins of the flesh; where inhibitions are stripped away…_

I wrapped my hands around the smooth skin.

…_I will free you from the sins that tie you to this world, my dear…_

I began to squeeze gently…almost lovingly.

_Do you understand? I am doing you a big favor. I am helping you…_

Those blue eyes – which had seemed to darken with her arousal – began to widen as I applied a little more pressure. As I stared into them, I gradually began to realize I was almost comparing them to…well…that other blue-eyed sinner I didn't want to know. However, unlike Uzumaki Naruto's – whose eyes seemed a little brighter and more…intense, her eyes were (disappointedly) different. Enoh's seemed murky and pale; incapable of producing the same fiery light like Uzumaki Naruto's.

_And why the fuck am I even thinking about that stupid, clumsy fool?_

"Sa…su…ke…sa…ma…" came the breathless gasps of desperation beneath me. I could feel her hands reaching up in an attempt to stop me; the frantic jerks of her legs as she struggled to escape. Her features were turning a little pale, and I squeezed harder still.

_Why can't you understand that I am trying to help you?_ My mind screamed in confusion. _You are not of this world. You do not belong here where you will be tarnished by the sins of man. I will send you away…back to a place where your soul can finally find its peace. I will…_

_/You spineless coward/_

Like suddenly being slapped or doused with a bucket of ice, that firm, hard voice within my mind had me releasing Enoh quickly. I stared in horror at the bruise I had left behind; harsh, ugly red marks against her smooth skin while she coughed violently and tried to suck in much needed air.

_What was I doing? What the hell had I planned to do?_

I stared at my trembling hands; unable to believe I had been this close to taking a life for no damn good reason. Enoh's harsh sobs had me scrambling off her body; and the sudden overwhelming wave of shame and sorrow to hit me caused a low moan of disbelief to escape my lips. Feeling my legs and knees give way, I sunk onto the mattress and buried my feverish head and face within my hands. I was doomed. There was no longer any hope for me. What penance could I possibly carry out to atone for my actions tonight?

"Leave," I finally croaked when it seemed like Enoh had no plans to excuse herself long after her coughing fit had subsided. "Go now," I ordered a little louder. "Please…just…get away from me…"

I suddenly felt like crying.

When there was still no effort, on her part, to do as I had commanded, I looked up with impatience and frustration. "Didn't I say you could leave? Or do you want me to really kill you?"

I fully expected her to flee, but was surprised when she simply rose to her feet to stand before me. In this way, she towered over me, and perhaps it was the silent tears running down her cheeks, or the way the blond hair was finally released from its knot to cascade in waves around her shoulders and back, or the way she held herself with such dignity. Whatever it was, Enoh – at this very moment – looked like something out of the pages of the Great Book. A goddess, not of this world. She seemed powerful yet ethereal, and as if my night of surprises couldn't get any worse (or shocking), I watched as she began to untie the sash holding her kimono together.

"Wha…what are you doing?" I whispered. "What do you think you're doing? Are you not afraid of me? Did you not hear me? I will kill -"

"It is not in your heart, my Lord," came her cryptic yet soft reply that brought a hard lump to my throat. "I have seen the pain and anguish in your eyes, Sasuke-sama. Your suffering…I felt it deep within me, and I want to help you."

"Help me?" I would have laughed out loud, if I wasn't too busy being shocked at the sight of her kimono falling off her body with a gossamer whisper to the floor. Aside from a pair of white cotton panties on her curvy hips, I was officially looking at my first naked female body…that was not within the pages of history or anatomy books. I could feel my entire body burn with a rush of heat that made me want to look away, and yet I couldn't.

(beautiful)

My fingers itched to touch…to explore…to see if it was as soft and wondrous as it appeared to me. The breast I had squeezed earlier, still had my mark on it, but beneath the glow of the lanterns, her skin had taken on a golden hue to mask the bruises. Her dusky nipples were erect and begging to be kissed and sucked on, and though she seemed to be covering that V between her legs with her hand, I could still make out the damp patch forming on the light cotton cloth. It gave off a musky scent that pleased my senses greatly. My tongue suddenly felt heavy and dry; as if knowing that only one thing would appease its thirst.

"Please…" she was whispering as she reached out to cradle my cheeks tenderly. Almost immediately, I shuddered; the recollection of Orochimaru's caresses interfering with this moment. Still, there was something decidedly different about Enoh's touch. I had no idea if she was hypnotizing me, but as my lashes grew heavier, I could feel loving warmth flowing through me; a sensation that almost made me want to burst into tears.

"Let me cleanse you, my Lord," she begged as she slowly knelt before me. "Use me as you wish. Let me make it all go away…"

I couldn't tell her that I hadn't been with a woman before. I couldn't get my lips to form the words that I had vowed to stay away from the temptations and wiles of sinners like her, and that I had chosen to follow the path where my only satisfaction came in eradicating evil. I wanted to recite all this to her, and yet as I found myself being pushed back to the mattress and that flowing blond hair enveloping me in a shroud, I knew it was going to be pointless fighting against this overwhelming power she had over me.

The devil's mistress. She had won this time.

"Enoh…" I groaned and closed my eyes as my hips bucked with the feel of her gentle fingers on my nipples and torso.

"Yes, my Lord…" she breathed.

_Do what you will,_ I thought with a soft sigh of resignation. _Wash away his repulsive violation and make me feel whole again. _Come morning, I vowed to find the nearest temple to perform several rites of ablutions. Until then, I welcomed my first initiation into manhood with no more questions asked.

It would only occur to me - much, much later – that the hard voice I had heard in my mind; the voice that had stopped me from doing the unthinkable - had come from none other than the blue-eyed sinner who haunted my dreams.

It was a clear sign that Uzumaki Naruto was slowly beginning to seep into my very consciousness; a troublesome prospect I could no longer control.

* * *

><p><em>Naruto:<em>

"Atchoo!" Sniffle. ". Brrrrrr!"

I shook myself like a dog would when doused with water. It was just too damn cold in the fucking morning to be doing this, but I gotta admit…Byaku-Shinkyou looked breathtaking with all the snow around.

About three inches fell last night (there were still flurries at the moment), hence coating everything with a blanket of white. If I had a camera, I could take a couple of pictures, but I settled for imprinting them within the memory banks; at least grateful that I was still alive to see something like this. It hardly snowed down South, and even if it did snow, they never made the scenery as beautiful as this. Maybe it's because we were in the relative countrysi-

"Stop moping and start shoveling, Uzumaki!" came the barked ordered from the officer on duty that rudely jerked me back to reality.

"Yes, sir," I yelled back; contemplated giving a mock salute, but figured I was going to push my luck if I pissed him off this early in the day.

I eyed the snow-covered path leading to the dining halls with an inner sigh. So yes, it was beautiful, but the work was going to be tedious as hell. There were about ten of us assigned to shoveling aside the snow so the officers could walk safely to their destinations. Such jobs were going on all over the grounds actually, so it wasn't as if we were the only ones having to deal with it. Besides, you'd think they'd invest in those large trucks that shoveled snow and would have made the work a little faster. Guess budget cuts didn't plan for that one.

"I hate snow. I hate snow. I hate snow. I hate snow," came the grumbled chant beside me. It was my good buddy, Chouji, who – with every shovel of snow tossed aside – would go into his chant.

"Saying it won't make it disappear any quicker," I replied with a low chuckle as I began to work as well.

"Whatever," Chouji muttered, while sparing a quick glare to his left. "Look at them…all nice and cozy in their heavy jackets and hot cocoa, while we're freezing our asses off here."

I glanced at the three guards leaning against the building while laughing about something amongst themselves. They did look nice and warm in their black wool coats, and as I watched the steam rise from the big mugs they were holding, it was clear whatever they were drinking smelled and probably tasted delicious. My stomach growled with the lick of my lips. We were yet to have breakfast, and last night's meal of tepid miso soup and rice was hardly enough to satisfy the long hours put in the kitchens. Since Lord Orochimaru wasn't around, some of the officers had decided to throw an impromptu Christmas party, so the kitchen had worked overtime trying to get all their celebratory dishes finished on time. You'd think they'd be a couple of leftovers, but according to the hierarchy of sinners, I was on the lowest rung; hence all the purified sinners got the good bits, and I had nothing left but empty pans to lick off (which I didn't do of course).

Anyway, for protection against the cold, we were only allowed to wear light gray jackets that were hardly thick enough to keep your teeth from chattering or the winter chill nipping at your flesh. At least we had been issued thick socks, so it was enough protection for the feet. All the same, the cold did not really help my healing joints and limbs. The colder it got, the stiffer they became, and going to bed at night was becoming something I dreaded. Having to get up in the morning would be a lesson in tolerance, because it became so bad, I sometimes felt I couldn't get up at all. I was like an old man in a nineteen-year-old's body!

Fucking depressing if you ask me.

"I remember when I used to build snowmen with my children," one of the sinners was saying. His name was Soujiro; a lanky guy who looked like just touching him would make him break in two. He said he had been brought in for embezzlement, but he explained he had been so desperate to feed his family of five children, that he had no other choice. Poor guy. Being stuck here while his wife and family suffered on the outside. At least the little money he made here, he did send to them, and he had said he was only going to be here for two more years.

"My littlest one, Minami, she was always into making snow houses," he reminisced with a sniffle and low chuckle. I felt my heart stir at the expression on his face. He really did miss his family. You had to be blind not to see the pure love and adoration within those gray eyes. "She would make the biggest one like this high…" He motioned to somewhere around his thighs.

"Really?" I asked; since no one else seemed to want to engage in conversation with him. Everyone else had the same glum expression as they shoveled. I at least figured I could talk to the guy since he seemed eager to share his story. "How old is she?"

Soujiro's face lit up with genuine pleasure. It was apparent my interest made him happy, and I felt my lips twitch in a reluctant smile. Something as simple as sharing a story about family, eh? Wish I had happy ones to tell…

"She's going to be six in a few days," he remarked with a chuckle. "She likes to sing karaoke just like her father."

"I bet she sings better than you," I teased, which made Soujiro burst into laughter. It made the weary lines of age disappear from his face.

"Well…I guess you could say tha…URK!"

The sudden and unexpected heavy blow had come from nowhere, but it was still enough to have my jaw dropping in disbelief as I watched Soujiro slowly crumble to the ground in a boneless heap. The wound inflicted on his head, from the bokken, was slowly beginning to stain the once pristine white snow with its dark red hue. By this time, the other sinners had stopped shoveling to gawk at the scene in curious silence.

The guard spat at the foot of the motionless figure before kicking it lightly. "Get up, you lousy asshole. Keep chattering when you should be working, eh?"

"…he was working," someone muttered coldly. It would take me another second to realize **I** was the one who had spoken. My gaze was still trained on the spreading blossom of red, and I wondered if he was dead. If his family would never see him again. If little Minami, whose birthday was in a few days, would never get to build snow houses with her father because of some stupid asshole who considered himself holier than thou and felt that he could –

"Did you say something, Uzumaki?" the asshole sneered. I could hear his footsteps approaching, but I didn't look up.

"Hey!" He prodded my shoulder with the handle of his bokken. "Hey! Didn't you hear me you scarred freak show? What did you say?" He prodded me again; a little harder, and I did nothing but grind my teeth and form a clenched fist. If I started any trouble, I knew they wouldn't hesitate to chuck me back into the dungeon. Shikamaru had worked hard to get me out of there, and I wasn't going to let that be for naught.

_Bear with it. Bear with it. Bear with it._

"Chickenshit," the guard whispered as he stepped up to my face. His breath smelled like hot tea and onions; his features taut and pale beneath the turban. He barely looked older than me. "What? What!" He taunted. "Why are you looking at me like that? Wanna fight, eh? I can see it in your eyes, you spawn of the Devil."

"Let it go, Aoi," one of the other guards called out. "You just better pray the other guy ain't dead or youse gonna get it from Officer Ootori."

With a final painful jab at my shoulder, Aoi the asshole stomped away, but not before glaring at all the other sinners. "What are y'all looking at? Get back to work!"

The shoveling continued in earnest; though some of the sinners now had expressions of quiet derision at the obnoxious guard. I turned back to my section of land to be shoveled, my anger pouring into each plunge of my shovel into the thick snow. I could have killed that son of a bitch…

"You should have taken him," Chouji muttered beneath his breath. From the corner of our eyes, we watched the guards hover over Soujiro's immobile form. I was now hoping he really wasn't dead. The guy looked weak enough already. That blow would have been enough to take him down…permanently.

I grunted and said nothing to Chouji's remark, though a part of me sneered at the idea that they were waiting for _me_ to make the move. Why couldn't _he_ do it? He had hands and legs, didn't he? I could have taken the annoying SOB, but I knew the situation was bigger than myself. Giving in to the taunt would make me fall right into their trap. I knew most of the guards didn't think much of me, and felt I shouldn't be mingling around the other sinners in the first place. I was still filth and unclean or whatever, so to them, I was really worth less than a cockroach. I just wondered why no one had gone as far out with me as they could have. I mean I had been talking too, but Aoi hadn't even hit me. Just his stupid taunting. In fact, now that I thought about it, besides the glares and cold treatment from the guards and officers, none of them had gone out of their way to really inflict any kind of harsh beating or punishment. Sure, I hadn't gone out of my way to cause any trouble, but it was still…strange…

"Oooh…look who's out and about," came the whisper from another sinner to our right. We turned to see what had gotten his attention, and sure enough, it was someone new…and definitely not 'one of us.'

I don't know what it was; couldn't even explain it if I could, but it was almost the way I had felt when I saw that 'girl' in the bus. It was the way my heart suddenly seemed to skip a little faster at the sight of something really beautiful, and how I wanted to stand a little taller and to show that beneath this dirty yukata and injured bones was a man who could treat her right…

Wait a minute…_her_? Didn't Shikamaru say there were no women allowed on the grounds? Which could only mean that…

_Damn. Not again._

…the slender figure with the long black hair, dressed in a pastel kimono and protected by a black top coat, was just another pretty boy from the 'exclusive' section of the grounds.

_Son of a bitch. I really have been kept too long in this place. It's becoming harder to differentiate between the sexes!_

"Haku-chan," the man who had whispered sighed in a lovesick manner that made my stomach churn. "Isn't he beautiful?"

"She's a fucking guy," I gritted as I shoveled a little faster. Just thinking about it made my embarrassment, at the mistake with that Sasuke bastard, come to the forefront again. If anyone else knew I had even considered banging that 'chick', I would never live it down. At least Shikamaru had stopped teasing me about my mistake. Thank God for small mercies.

"So what?" the sinner argued beneath his breath. The guards were now ordering two other sinners to lead the unconscious Soujiro to the sick bay. "Haku-chan is like a flower. So delicate and pretty. He always manages to give us a smile and make us feel better."

"Urgh."

"And he's Sasuke-sama's personal manservant," Chouji added just as Haku-_chan_ began to climb the small flight of steps leading to the dining halls. Almost immediately, a few sinners dashed to clear away more snow to make a path for her…_him_ (damnit!), all of them smiling and blushing as Haku covered his mouth with a shy giggle and thanked them for their kindness.

"You look lovely today, Haku-chan," the lovesick fool stuttered with a light bow.

"Stop saying that, Sanzo-san," Haku tittered like a girl; though his pale cheeks were rosy at the compliment. "You work hard now, okay?"

"I will!" he vowed with a salute. "Will Haku-chan pray for me today?"

"Of course I will."

"And me too! And me too!" the other sinners began to chime, even Chouji got into the act; though he seemed more amused at the events taking place than actually being enamored by the effeminate manservant. I watched him approach our direction, and by this time, the smart guards had managed to cover up the scene of Soujiro's fall, so no questions could be asked. I guess being the manservant to their first captain sort of made him one to be feared too, because they stood at attention and tried to look their best.

He walked past me…or would have, but seemed to falter in his step before turning back to look at me with an expression of innocent bemusement in his eyes. What now? What did I do? I tried to smile and gave an indulgent bow, but knowing he was that bastard's servant…I just couldn't get myself to do it. I guess things were beginning to fall into place now. With such a girly servant, who needed a real woman to keep his bed warm at night? No wonder he was such a stuck up asshole. There was no doubt that our dear captain was a flaming –

"…lue eyes…" Haku-chan was muttering, and I blinked in confusion. What was he talking about?

"Haku-san," one of the guards interrupted us. "What brings you here so early in the morning?"

"Oh…" He seemed to shake himself; as if coming out of a daze, before smiling lightly at the guard. "I just thought I'd have breakfast in the dining hall today. If that's okay…"

"Of course!" the man said with a laugh that was just too loud. "We'd be honored to have you join us today. This way, Haku-san. Watch your step."

I rolled my eyes and turned back to shoveling the snow; but I could still feel those large brown eyes trained on me. Why was I of interest to him? Had Sasuke warned him about me? And besides, this was the first time the guy was eating in the dining hall, so why did he decide to do that today? Did he get in a lover's tiff with his _dear_ Sasuke?

Any other rhetorical questions I could have for myself, was erased as more officers began to stream towards the dining halls. We did our best to shovel away as much snow as possible, and by breakfast time, I was hungry and hurting enough to eat the entire pot of miso soup.

Since I was unpurified, I was not allowed to eat with the other sinners; hence it was either eating in the kitchen or climbing up to the alcove in the storage shed to eat there. It was a neat place I had found when the weather wasn't as cold, and it gave me a good view of the grounds between the kitchens and laundry area. I tried to settle in between the wooden slats (I've bumped my head against them one too many times) to get comfortable. It was cold in here, but much better than not being able to eat without people shoving and pushing you around in the kitchen. I unwrapped my package, a hard lump coming to my throat as I noticed Old Man Chef had wrapped an extra rice ball for me. I chewed on it slowly; savoring the sweet taste until I realized I was crying silently.

I sniffled and scrubbed my eyes; hating myself for being this weak, but I couldn't help it. There were times when my emotions would get the best of me; when the weariness and realization that I wasn't really free, would have me crying either in my sleep or when I was alone like this. I missed so many things in the 'outside' world, things like hearing the sound of cars and buses honking loudly outside my apartment window, the smells of civilization – of women and children - of eating really good food and being able to walk down the street (even if in disguise) so I could feel normal again. The loneliness in this place was killing me. If I couldn't carry out my plan to destroy this place…

(and how? Really, Naruto? How do you plan to do it?)

…I would almost wish for Gudan to be here already so I could just die and end it all.

"So this is where you are," came the familiar voice that had me looking down and into Shikamaru's familiar visage. "Can I come up?"

"Got your entrance fee?" I asked, glad for the cold so he would assume that my sniffling and reddened eyes were from the weather and not from me being a cry baby.

He reached into his yukata to pull out a wrapped piece of his grilled fish, and nodding in acceptance, I motioned for him to climb the ladder that would lead him to my hiding place.

It was a tight fit, but he managed to squeeze himself in beside me and after our exchange of goods, we were content to eat in companionable silence. We watched some of the sinners on laundry duty stomp through the snow carrying large containers or baskets full of uniforms to be washed. And though it was almost nine in the morning, the skies were still dull, gray and promised more snow for the evening. I guess we'd have to shovel much more tomorrow morning.

_Sigh._

"You don't mind me smoking, do you?" Shikamaru asked. He was already putting the damn thing in his mouth, and without waiting for me to say 'no', he lit up and promptly sent me coughing as he blew the smoke in my face.

"Amateur," he teased.

"Fuck you too," I coughed and waved the smoke aside. "One day, when you're in hospital dying of lung cancer, don't expect me to donate mine to you."

He laughed and nudged me gently. "Fool. They don't donate lungs."

"Yeah, they do."

"Tell me one person who has donated a lung to another. Go on, tell me."

I pressed a finger to my forehead and tried to think, but as I drew a blank, his chuckle made me blush. "Yeah, well, I'm sure there's got to be a lung transplant patient out there," I grumbled.

"I don't want your sinking lung anyway." He poked at my chest. "It will probably kill me."

I puffed out my chest. "I have the best lung in the world, douche bag. You wish you could have it."

For the next five minutes, we argued over whose lung was best, until I was done eating. I finished my bottle of water with a loud belch.

"God…I need a good fuck," I groaned abruptly.

It was a weird thing about my body. After eating, I sometimes got the urge to either jerk off or find a woman to satisfy me. Sure it was weird to do so in the kitchens or even up here in the storage shed, so I've been unable to satisfy the masturbation side of things. After Sakura's death, the urge had faded as well, but in the latter years (before my arrest); I was able to find a willing body in a local brothel for a cheap price. One hour of bliss with no strings attached. Two hours if I was particularly horny.

"Don't look at me," Shikamaru replied dryly. "Though I'm sure there are some guys here that will be glad to keep you company."

"Urgh." I shuddered at the idea of a man touching me, and my repulsion was heightened at the memory of my experience down below. Shikamaru must have realized it because he threw me an understanding glance.

"Sorry," he muttered.

"Whatever." I shrugged and tried to brush it off. "Say…how do you manage? You know…"

He motioned with his hand (obviously). "And whenever I get a pass to go to town."

"You get a pass?" I asked incredulously. "When?"

"Once in a blue moon. They pick a few of us to go into town, mostly to help pick up supplies – and if we have a particularly nice officer on duty, he lets us have a little fun for a couple of hours."

I glared at him in envy. "Lucky bastard."

"Yeah…but I already have a girlfriend, remember?" He flicked some ash aside. "I don't go about fucking every girl I see."

"I thought you said she was in hospital?"

"She is."

"How is she anyway?"

"Still alive." His features took on a pensive look, and I wondered how much he missed his woman. "She's going to be released in a week or so. She might come to visit me when the temple is open for the public."

"Oh…that's nice," I said quietly; my heart breaking as I thought of Sakura never getting an opportunity to visit me…not unless she keeps showing up in my dreams.

"I heard you got to see the famous Haku-chan today," Shikamaru stated with a light snort; perhaps realizing that talking about girlfriends was beginning to depress the shit out of me. However, bringing up the effeminate boy was no better either.

"Yeah…all the guys on my team just about drooled all over themselves when he showed up."

Shikamaru chuckled. "Yep. He's got that effect on people."

"Man, I don't understand how anyone can be attracted to someone like that…"

"The same way you were attracted to Sasuke…"

"I told you…!"

"Yeah, yeah, it was a mistake." Shikamaru grinned, and I growled in response. "Hey, what's the difference? Well, there is a big difference, but attraction is attraction. You can't help it if it happens."

"Pfft."

"Don't be fooled by the way he looks though," Shikamaru continued. "The guy is pretty strong. I've seen him training in the dojo and man…" He whistled softly. "He could take down guys ten times his size with his _kenjutsu_ and _taijutsu_ skills. No wonder Sasuke chose him as his bodyguard."

I said nothing; though a part of me was curious as to how a guy, who looked that weak, could be a deadly killer. Guess you really couldn't judge a book by its cover. I wondered if he would kill me if I tried to attack his master? Maybe if I took him out first…

"Speaking of which…he's not around, did you know that?"

I yawned and dug a finger into my ear to scratch it in disinterest. "What? Who's not around?"

"Sasuke," Shikamaru replied with a small smile. "He left town with Lord Orochimaru."

"…so?" What the hell did he expect me to say? To jump for joy? Do back flips and cartwheels around the place in jubilation?

"That the way you treat the person who rescued your ass from more sodomizing?"

I stiffened and eyed him warily. "What are you saying?"

"I'm saying that it was Sasuke who signed the papers saying you were released, and by order no one is to touch you until the rites of Gudan begin." Shikamaru crushed out the cigarette on a wooden slat and tried to stretch out his legs, which was next to impossible. "Didn't you wonder why the guards and officers weren't after your ass all this time?"

Yes, I did wonder about that, but still…

"So…I guess I'm supposed to start licking his boots now?" I sneered and rolled my eyes. "He sent me down there in the first place, so big fucking deal. He suddenly got a conscience and figured I didn't belong down there. Whoopity freakin' do."

Not sure of why this news should upset me even more, I uncoiled myself from my position and all but slid down the ladder. I ignored Shikamaru calling me as I stomped out – in no particular direction (though I really should have been going back to the kitchen to begin dishwashing) – hoping to get as far away from Shikamaru's revelation as possible.

I knew what this was all about. He had released me so I'd feel 'indebted' to him. It was the oldest trick in the book, and it made me sick that he'd go that low to make himself seem benevolent and kind-hearted. He might as well just chuck me back down there and be done with it. Just how long did he plan on humiliating me?

I kicked at a tree and sucked in a harsh breath as the pain shot up to my head. Sinking to my haunches (damn it was getting colder); I hugged the light jacket around me and tried to think. If we met again, he'd want me to thank him…no, he must have been expecting it that other time we collided into each other, but I hadn't said anything because I didn't know. All the same, there was no way in hell that I was going to –

"Hello."

_Huh?  
><em>

I looked up quickly; bracing myself for some guard or officer about to give me more grief. However, I found myself looking into that pretty face with those large brown eyes that were now obvious with their curiosity. He was squatting just like me, which made the situation pretty funny (to anyone looking at us), but I was more confused than anything. What the hell did he want with me? And how the hell did he find me? I hadn't even heard his footsteps or was I too lost in my thoughts to have noticed?

He gave a small smile. "I don't think I've seen you around here," he continued in that same friendly tone and an expression that made him look like he was a kid. His fresh-faced innocence was unnerving. How was he strong and dangerous? He looked like he couldn't hurt a damn fly.

"I don't get around much," I finally replied with a light shrug. "Sorry for not being one of your many… fans."

His smile widened and he cupped his chin as if staring at an interesting specimen; his gaze was intense and kinda…bothersome. It made me feel uncomfortable, and I looked away…and began to make snowballs (of all things); more to keep my hands busy. He watched me roll at least three before copying me. Can you believe this guy? Still it was interesting to see him forming the perfect balls between his hands, and before long, we had made about a pile of twenty or more of the tennis-ball sized things.

"Fort Haku," he declared, drawing a circle around them with a dead branch. "You need to build a bigger fort foooor…?"

"…Naruto," I finally replied. Nice way of getting my name. I smiled at the tactic, which he reciprocated. He really did have a cute smile. "Uzumaki Naruto."

"I knew it."

_Eh? _I raised a brow at his chuckle.

"No…" He began to explain. "It's just that my master kept muttering your name one night while he was struggling to stay awake, and I noticed he kept doodling your name over and over on his paper. U-zu-ma-ki Na-ru-to." He wrote out my name in Kanji within the snow. "You are the blue-eyed sinner."

I rose to my feet abruptly, and he made no attempt to copy me this time; though he did look up with bemusement. "Did I say something wrong?"

I didn't like it. I did not like this at all. The notion that the captain had it out for me from the get-go was enough to let me know that I had to set my plan in motion quickly. I had to do _something_ to begin to change my fate. I couldn't let this guy have this much control over me. He was like the freakin' puppet master and everything seemed to be connected directly to him. It was aggravating.

"Are you not Naruto?" Haku asked again.

"Yes…yes, I am," I replied tightly; as my hands formed tight fists. "And you can give your master this message for me."

"What's that?"

"Tell him that I have no intention of kissing his ass; not now, not ever. I will fight him tooth and nail if I have to, but he will not dictate how I live the rest of my life in this dump! Got it?"

I guess Haku had never heard anyone talk about his master that way (or have to deliver such a message for that matter), because his eyes and mouth became wide as saucers. I would have stayed longer to savor my minor victory, but I could hear my name being hollered from the kitchen area, and I knew I had to hightail it before I got in trouble.

_Yeah, like that little 'message' isn't going to get your ass in even more hot water if he decides to deliver it to dear Sasuke. _

I sighed and rubbed my forehead. I swear sometimes my mouth does tend to run off before I can stop it. Well…whatever happens would happen. I'd just have to brace myself for the punishment that was bound to come my way.

Guess I should have known better, for little would I know… that the problems were only just beginning.


	10. 10: Lullaby

**Notes: **My sincere apologies for the delay. My laptop died on me and with that all my files, so it's been a week of scrambling, crying, scrambling, crying some more, and trying to figure out what the hell to do. *sigh* Anyway, I just wanted to thank you all for your wonderful comments and feedback on the last chapter. I know I keep saying they encourage me to write, but this time around, they really did. I was so down in the dumps I was definitely NOT in the mood to write another word, but I owed it to those of you who take the time to write out your thoughts. I just couldn't leave you all hanging. Thank you again, and I hope you enjoy the new chapter.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 10: <strong>

**Lullaby**

[Japanese Lullaby by Eugene Field]

_Sleep, little pigeon, and fold your wings,—_

_Little blue pigeon with velvet eyes;_

_Sleep to the singing of mother-bird swinging—_

_Swinging the nest where her little one lies._

Her voice was a soothing sound; like gentle rain on a pleasant summer night. My head lay on her lap, my lashes growing heavier with weariness as the scents, sights, and sounds of late July assailed my young senses. The sensation of her hands caressing my hair, and every now and then her fingers reaching out to trace the outline of my forehead and cheeks, made me feel good..._loved_. I snuggled even closer to her warmth; inhaling those inherent emotions only mothers seem able to ooze from their very pores.

_Away out yonder I see a star,—_

_Silvery star with a tinkling song;_

_To the soft dew falling I hear it calling—_

_Calling and tinkling the night along_.

We were the only ones at home, which was fine with me. Sure I had pouted and complained when Father wanted to take Itachi again for training at the dojo, but he had only smiled and pet my head saying, "When you're a little bigger, Sasuke. Don't worry. Your time will come." _When?_ I had wanted to ask, but Itachi had whispered into my ear that he'd bring me a surprise if I behaved myself, and knowing how Itachi's 'surprises' were always the coolest, that did the trick effectively.

_In through the window a moonbeam comes,—_

_Little gold moonbeam with misty wings;_

_All silently creeping, it asks, "Is he sleeping—_

_Sleeping and dreaming while mother sings?"_

Being with Mother meant, for the most part, watching her do the household chores. She allowed me to help with the laundry, and together we hung up kimonos, yukatas, and bed sheets on wooden clotheslines in the backyard. The dull flapping sound of the clothes dancing with the afternoon's breeze was an odd but not unpleasant musical accompaniment to Mother's voice. In the distance we could hear the neighbors calling to each other in cheerful greeting, while the delicious smells of grilled or smoked fish, sweet potatoes, or barbequing pork filled the air. In a few minutes, Mother would probably want to start getting dinner ready for Father and Itachi...with the hopes that they did come home on time. There were some nights when Father would work extra long hours at the office, causing Mother to sit all alone in the living room waiting patiently for his return. In those moments, when I would peek in to see her like that, I always thought she looked so sad; a sight that almost always broke my heart. I never wanted to see my Mother unhappy.

"'_Kaasan?_"

"Hmm?"

"When I get bigger, I'll always come home on time for dinner. I promise I'll never be late."

She stopped humming for a heartbeat, and when she spoke again, I could hear the smile in her voice.

"And I'll always be here waiting for you, my brave little warrior."

I blushed as she leaned closer to place her warm lips against my forehead. I would have wiped it off if Itachi was around (because it was always embarrassing and he would sometimes tease me about it), but when we were alone like this, I didn't mind her affectionate gestures. However, as I adjusted my body to get more comfortable, the sound of the sheets flapping in the wind seemed to quicken as an angry gust of wind suddenly swooped in from nowhere. I shivered at the chill that accompanied this unexpected change in weather; an anomaly for this time of the day (or year for that matter).

"'_Kaasan?_" I whimpered; looking into the heavens that were now filled with darkening gray clouds. "Looks like it's going to rain."

But my mother was not paying much attention to me. She kept singing as if unaware of the ominous change in the air.

_Up from the sea there floats the sob_

_Of the waves that are breaking upon the shore,_

_As though they were groaning in anguish, and moaning—_

_Bemoaning the ship that shall come no more._

"'_Kaasan?_" I called out a little louder. I could hear _it_. I could hear _them_. The pounding, thunderous sounds of hooves from seemingly a thousand horses. I could hear the screams of death, and I knew what was coming; knew what was inevitable. All the same, I _had_ to warn her; had to tell her to get away from the patio. We had to get inside..._now!_

"'_Kaasan!_"

_But sleep, little pigeon, and fold your wings,—_

_Little blue pigeon with mournful eyes;_

_Am I not singing?—see, I am swinging—_

_Swinging the nest where my darling lies._

"We have to go inside now!" I screamed, but I could not hear my voice. Mother was still smiling to herself; oblivious to anything and everything. I tried to pull away; to drag her to her feet, but her grip had now tightened around my neck, holding me prisoner. Could she not see? Could she not understand that she was going to die? Did she not want me to rescue her? Why wouldn't she let me go?

"'_Kaaaasaaaan!_" I bellowed as the deafening neigh of a horse as black as night and as large as a house, with a rider I could not recognize in matching dark robes, leapt over the fence with the longest and sharpest katana I had ever seen being unsheathed.

"Do not be afraid, my little brave warrior," my mother was saying with that same warm smile on her features. "I will always be here with you….waiting…"

My scream of horror was drowned in the cacophony of chaos as I watched my mother beheaded for the second time. The smile still remained on her beautiful face, though her head seemed to twist endlessly in the air until it was caught by her long hair by the unknown black rider. He dangled my mother's head before me as if seeking my approval, and in a swift move, he/it tossed the head into a bulging bag attached to his horse. I was sure I could make out my father and Itachi's head in there as well; a sight that sent me completely numb with terror.

I couldn't even open my mouth to make a sound anymore.

"It's your turn, Uchiha Sasuke," the black rider spoke in a voice that seemed to boom from all corners of the earth. The katana gleamed beneath the skies in silver and blood, and as I squeezed my eyes shut and waited for the deadly strike to take me away…

* * *

><p><em>But sleep, little pigeon, and fold your wings,—<em>

_Little blue pigeon with mournful eyes;_

I lifted my lashes with a breathless gasp.

_Am I not singing?—see, I am swinging—_

_Swinging the nest where my darling lies._

I was confused.

_Am I still dreaming? Why am I still hearing that song? …Kaa…Kaasan? Is that you?_

And yet there was something quite different about this dream. I was no longer a child for one thing, and I was definitely not in Byaku-Shinkyou either. There was a scent in the air that was a far cry from warm dinners and late summer evenings. For although this smell was not of my mother's, I could still sense the familiar warmth that only a woman could provide. Orientation of my surroundings did not take long as my companion moved gently, causing her long blonde hair to fall across my shoulders and torso.

Enoh.

_Sleep, little pigeon, and fold your wings,—_

_Little blue pigeon with velvet eyes;_

_Sleep to the singing of mother-bird swinging—_

_Swinging the nest where her little one lies._

She was the one singing softly and caressing my head as my mother had done all those years ago. Though I would have appreciated the sentiment of trying to get me to sleep (or maybe I did fall asleep after 'The Act'), listening to those lyrics now only sent unpleasant shivers down my spine. I never wanted to hear them again.

"Stop," I commanded though my voice sounded hoarse and drugged.

"My Lord?" came the bemused reply. Mercifully, her fingers had also stopped fiddling with the strands of my hair.

"That song," I explained quietly. Her soft yet firm breasts pressed tenderly against my back, and it was only a reminder of how I had dared to feel them…of how she had actually encouraged me to suckle on those pert nipples like a babe deprived of food. I felt my cheeks become warm at how wanton I had behaved.

_Shameful. _

"Do you not like it?" came the question that jarred me from my thoughts.

"Like what?"

"The song, my Lord. You said…"

"Never sing it in my presence again," I stated. I could feel her confused look trained on me, but she dutifully agreed with my decision without question.

"As you wish, Sasuke-sama."

There was a long, awkward, and somewhat uncomfortable pause in which I mused over what had transpired moments earlier? _Moments?_ I glanced at the clock and winced inwardly. It was almost four in the morning. Enoh had been with me for the past hour; an hour in which new discoveries had left me feeling satiated yet strangely unsatisfied. Why?

'The Act' had, at first, been mostly her doing all the work as I simply lay back and observed her attempts to pleasure me. It was Haku's massage all over again; only this time, Enoh's lips and tongue had introduced me to a sensation that was more potent than whatever my manservant could conjure up. I admit it was embarrassing having to watch her suck on my penis with more enthusiasm than should be necessary (and there had been a moment when I was sure she was going to actually bite it off). However, my fears aside, the final result was all that mattered. I don't think I have ever come so hard in my life, and it was all I could not to scream out at the surge of adrenaline and heat that had my toes curling in downright ecstasy. She had swallowed every drop of it; another surprising moment that made me wonder if it was really that good to taste. She appeared to enjoy it, so I did not bother asking.

She also seemed to realize it was my first time with anyone, and did not laugh or mock my feeble attempts to reciprocate her actions. Enoh was a good and patient teacher, and her encouragement came with every breathless gasp and sigh she gave as I did my best to match her skills. I came to realize that the female body was much more sensitive than I could have possibly imagined. Just the gentle pinch of a nipple or blowing softly on her belly button was enough to get her excited, and when she led my fingers to the warm, moist heat between her legs, it was all I could do to keep her pinned to the futon. I could write an entire essay on my first exploration of the female vagina, but I'll spare you the details.

With the intricacies of foreplay mastered, it was finally time for consummation, and I could honestly say I had never been more intimidated and unsure of what to do with myself at the time. Again, Enoh was more than glad to show me the way, and though I hated to admit that I had once or twice tried to imagine what the process of intercourse would feel like; actually experiencing the real thing would be downright impossible to describe in mere words. To be crude, it felt like sinking your penis into warm dough…only the dough was capable of tightening around your organ and squeezing it at different and unexpected intervals, hence creating a sensation so intense, you felt as if you were going to pass out with pleasure.

I could only assume she had her orgasm before mine; for her hips had bucked hard, and I could feel her literally drench my swollen (and hard) organ with her body fluids. She bit hard into the pillow to stop herself from crying out loud; which was a good thing because I had no intention of trying to explain to anyone why I was sleeping with the servant. All the same, her release triggered mine, and again, it is hard to put into words how it felt at the time. Let's just say it was the same thing I experienced after Haku's massage…twice over.

Needless to say, after such an eventful day and all the stored up emotions having been released with the grand finale of 'The Act', I must have passed out in her arms in exhaustion. And now, wide awake and dealing with the after effects (a combination of being groggy and woozy), I wanted her gone as far away from me as possible. I felt sullied and tainted, and though it would have been foolish for me to run out at this hour to find the nearest temple for ablutions, I would have to make do with an early shower and bath and –

"Is my Lord disappointed?" came the quiet question which had me finally turning my head a little to give her my full attention.

She was now sitting up with the top sheet held protectively against her chest. Her gaze was downcast; her hair a tumbled blonde mess around her face and shoulders. Her skin was now a flushed hue of pink with some areas a much darker red thanks to my passionate embraces at times. As she captured her lower lip between her teeth, I realized that was one part of her body I had not touched yet. Though they were inviting, kissing her would make the situation even more…awkward, and besides, I did not want to give her the impression that I planned to take this relationship any further. In my naïve world, the act of kissing a person on the lips meant that you intended to continue (or begin) an intimate relationship. I had only seen my father do that to my mother once – when they thought Itachi and I had gone to bed – hence I believed it was an act between people who loved each other deeply. I appreciated Enoh, and that was about it.

"…my Lord?" she prodded gently.

"No…" I replied carefully; trying not to hurt her feelings. I wanted to blurt out that it was a very good learning experience, but I had the idea that it was not exactly the sort of thing a woman would want to hear after giving herself up like this. "Uum…thank you…?"

She looked at me with an expression I couldn't quite decipher. Amusement? Anger? Pity? Had I said the wrong thing? Thanking her for her…companionship…was that such a bad thing?

"You were…eh…helpful," I added; feeling more foolish and yet frustrated by the second. What did she want from me?

She finally broke into a small smile before leaning close to place a kiss on my forehead. It was all I could do not to wipe it off on reflex. How dare she…?

"You really can be quite cute when you're embarrassed, Sasuke-sama."

Cu…_cute?_ What the hell does she mean by…?

However, before I could speak out my indignation at her insinuation that I was 'cute', she was already getting off the futon to seek her clothes. It gave me another opportunity to admire her slender yet strong build; her every movement beginning to stir my nether regions with that sinful desire I struggled to control. On closer inspection, I noticed my seed still trickling down (or stuck to) her thighs, and it immediately hit me that in the heat of the moment, I had forgotten to protect myself! How could I have been so stupid? What if she was the kind of woman who slept around with every man she felt sorry for? Did that mean I would soon contract some kind of venereal disease? Or worse…would she get pregnant with my child? I did not know what precautions such women took to protect themselves, and my problem now lay in framing a question about her sleeping habits without sounding like a complete asshole. I found myself opening and shutting my mouth for a few seconds while she slipped into her kimono, tied her sash, and began to brush out her hair with her fingers before getting it into a ponytail.

I cleared my throat and forced myself to speak. "Uum…Enoh…"

"Where did you get that?" came the sudden question that had me blinking in confusion. She was looking at my evening suit, which I had flung onto the chair earlier in the evening. Where did I get the suit from? What kind of a question was..?

However, it turned out it wasn't the suit that had caught her eye, but what she was now reaching out to pluck from it. It was the lucky charm Asuma had given me. I had tucked it within my jacket before leaving.

"A friend gave it to me," I replied warily. She was staring at it with an expression that was borderline amazement and yet fascination.

"Who is this friend?" she asked, which caused me to raise a brow at her audacity. Had she forgotten her place? She might have shared an intimate night with me, but it gave her no right to ask me questions as if I owed her any answer. I was just about to tell her to leave, when she reached into her kimono (I'm guessing there's a hidden pocket within it) to pull out an exact replica of the charm.

"See?" she said with a smile; her pale blue eyes shining with fervor. "It's the same thing."

"Probably generic," I muttered; now knowing Asuma must have bought it at some souvenir store. It somehow cheapened the gift for me now. I had really bought into it being unique and special.

"Not generic at all," Enoh was saying. She was back on the futon; leaning closer to me in earnest. "This is a special charm given to members of an organization. The inscription at the back…did you not see it?"

An inscription.

_May this protect you from all harm…_

/"Oh…and I wouldn't dismiss that lucky charm thing so quickly. Might want to give it a proper looksee when you've got the time."/

I all but snatched the charm from Enoh and peered hard at the words carved at the back of the ornament. However, I could see nothing different from…

"Here," she explained, now leaning so close, I could feel her warm breath against the back of my hand. She pushed aside my thumb and pointed to the even tinier kanji etched within the charm. It was written in such a way that it seemed to blend with the back of the cat's leg. It would have been hard for anyone else to see it anyway.

"Day…break…," I read slowly. "Daybreak…? What the fuck does that mean?"

Enoh's smile widened. "The Kanji reads as 'daybreak', but _we_ are known as _Akatsuki_. Whoever gave you the charm is probably a member of our group."

I looked up at her; the wig…the stronger voice…it was all an act after all. I knew it. Somehow this confirmation only did more to remind me of what had transpired at the dinner party yesterday night, and my paranoid thoughts of not being able to trust anyone seeped into my consciousness again.

"Who are you?" I asked coldly. "What are you? And what has Asuma got to do with all this?"

"Asuma?" She looked genuinely confused. "I must not have met him yet. I only just joined recently. However, if you want to know the truth…I will be glad to show you, Sasuke-sama."

"How…?"

"Tom…today is supposed to be my day for grocery shopping," she explained. "You must find a way to leave the house alone and meet me at Saiho-ji. It's one of the most famous temples in Kyoto. I'm sure you'll want to visit it."

"What time are we to meet?"

"Hmm…two o'clock seems fine. It will be quite busy then, and we should be able to talk without arousing suspicion. Meet me at the moss gardens situated in the eastern temple grounds. I will be waiting on the bridge by the Golden Pond."

I wanted to ask so many more questions, but she was gasping in panic as the clock hit the five o'clock mark.

"Oh my," she fretted while adjusting her wig. "I must leave you now, Sasuke-sama. I do not want Kaname to awaken and discover me no longer in bed."

"Ah…"

"I will see you later in the day," she cut in quickly, and this time, as she leaned close to me again, I braced myself for another kiss on the forehead, but was instead rewarded with the sensation of her soft lips against mine. Her audacity really was astonishing.

"Thank you for choosing me as your first, Sasuke-sama," she finally whispered with a smile so warm and friendly; my heart stirred with an emotion that threatened to get me emotional. It had been so long since anyone had looked at me in such a way, and I wanted to latch on to it for as long as I could.

"Get some rest," she advised as she rose to her feet and made her way to the door. "Oh, and by the way, it's not 'Enoh', it's 'Ino'," she corrected with a giggle, and with a polite bow, she slid open the shoji screen doors and let herself out with barely a sound.

"Ino," I recited with a shake of my head. Wasn't much of a difference in phonetics, but it did not matter to me now. As I lay back on the futon with my hands beneath my head, all I could think about was this new imparted information and what awaited me at the temple later on today. It was going to be tricky trying to convince Orochimaru to allow me to go sight-seeing on my own, but after what he did to me last night, he dared not refuse anything I requested.

_Daybreak…Akatsuki…red…moon…_

Who were they and what did they want with me? Why was Asuma a member? And why hadn't he told me about it after all this time? So many damn questions, so little time. Yet as my lashes grew heavier and I snuggled beneath the blanket to try to get some sleep, little would I know that the lingering musky scent of the first woman I ever 'loved' would be the only thing left for me to remember her by.

It would be the last time I ever saw Ino alive.

* * *

><p><em>Naruto:<em>

Haku was at it again.

Only this morning, he had his hair in some funny style that involved his long black hair framing each side of his face in a ponytail, and the rest of it, tied in a bun covered with some protective head piece I had never seen before. He had forgone the girlish kimono today at least (thank God), and was clad in a black long-sleeved turtleneck beneath a short but warm-looking navy blue yukata with a thick brown sash. His _hakama_ pants were a matching black; long enough to almost cover the heeled slippers and thick white socks he wore on his feet. He looked a little more manly today; emphasis on the 'little'.

What was even more embarrassing was that he made a straight beeline for me instead of stopping to flirt with the other prisoners as he usually did. Oh sure he greeted them and spent a few seconds chit-chatting, but with the way he kept craning his neck around in search for someone or something, the realization that he had been looking for me, made it worse.

"Good morning, Naruto-kun," he greeted with a bright smile; a stark contrast to the bitter gray morning, where we were - you guessed it – shoveling another two inches of snow that had fallen overnight. I couldn't feel my fingers and toes, but cheesy as it seems to say it, Haku's smile made you feel…well…_warm_ inside.

Was that a good thing?

Someone had the gall to whistle, and I could feel the rush of blood creeping up my neck as Haku giggled behind his hand and proceeded to watch me shovel with more force than necessary. I didn't have Chouji to protect me today because he was sick with the flu. So any attempt to pretend as if Haku didn't exist was not happening.

"How are you doing this morning, Naruto-kun? It's so cold today, isn't it?"

_No kidding, Captain Obvious,_ I wanted to snap, but I shoved down this dark side of me and forced myself to respond as cheerfully as I could. "Wanna help me shovel?"

I had only asked in jest; not really expecting him to agree, but boy, was I shocked when his eyes widened and he then cocked his head to the side as if in thought. "Well…I don't mind, but they won't let me." He pouted and nodded toward the guards who were watching us with expressions of confusion and annoyance. I bet they wanted to break up our little meeting, but didn't have the balls to interfere. Man, being Sasuke's manservant really did have its perks.

"Bummer," I agreed with a dramatic sigh. "It really is fun to shovel this snow for hours on end."

"Really?"

I glanced at him; wondering if his breathless response was him mocking me, but he _really_ did look innocent and earnest. I could tell him that shoveling snow would make him super strong or give him super powers, and he would eat it up just like that. He was turning out to be like one of those kids I used to tease and prank often while growing up on the streets. Was he really that gullible or just pulling my legs?

"I like snow," Haku volunteered as he stooped to his haunches beside me. I was careful not to shovel his foot on accident. He was that close. "Sometimes…" He folded his arms on his raised knees and rested his chin against them. "When I was growing up…sometimes I'd have to sleep in the snow because I had no place to live."

_What?_

I glanced at him again, but he wasn't looking at me. His brown eyes were distant and filled with a loneliness and sadness I could recognize. It was an expression that must have been etched on my face so many days and nights during my childhood; of wondering if you would ever live to see the next day, of not being appreciated and loved by anyone. I felt my heart stir so hard at the memories, that I had to turn away and bite my lower lip to control myself from reaching out to hug him.

"Sometimes the snow would protect me," he continued; now extending a palm to the heavens as a few snow flurries began to descend. "It would hide me from those people who tried to hurt me. When it snowed extra hard, they would never see me."

"Yeah…" I grunted as I tossed another shovelful of snow to the side. "Funny…"

"Hmm? What's funny?"

"I thought you were born and raised here," I said with a light shrug. He was already shaking his head before I was finished.

"Nope." He sighed and returned to folding his arms on his knees. "I was born in a small village several miles from here. It was Kimimaro-sama who brought me here. He saved my life when I thought I was going to die."

"Kimimaro…?"

He raised a brow. "You do not know him? He is the man who is always beside Orochimaru-sama. The one with the white-haired and dot on his forehead."

Ah…that guy. I had only seen him once, and that was on the night of the initial purification rites. In fact, now that I thought about it, it's the only time I've seen the snake-like dude as well. He didn't get out often, did he? Considering he was the supposed 'boss' and all.

"What about you?" came the question that had me blinking in confusion.

"What about me, what?"

"Where did you come from?"

_Everywhere and nowhere,_ I wanted to reply, and that would have been the God honest truth. I belonged _nowhere_. I was a walking nomad, and even if I was to be released today (by some miracle), I had no idea where I'd go. Probably back down South and as far away from the Bakufu as possible. I sighed and rubbed my forehead wearily.

"I come from…" I began to speak, but was rudely interrupted as the first trickle of officers began to approach the dining hall. Haku and I knew our chit-chat time was over. He rose to his feet quickly, and I noticed his body language changed as well. It was as if he had shielded himself in a block of ice – no pun intended – but I realized it was a tactic he had to adopt whenever in the presence of the high-ranking officials. After all, the very notion of speaking to an unpurified sinner like me could probably get him in trouble.

With a hurried whisper of 'I'll see you later', he joined the throng of the black-clad watchdogs and blended in effortlessly. Call me a sentimental old goat, but watching him leave did hurt…a little. It felt like he was abandoning me, and considering I had thought his company annoying just moments earlier, I berated myself for being so indecisive. Did I want him to hang around me or not?

I decided 'not' after I was teased mercilessly by the other guys about having a 'new boyfriend' the rest of the morning. Hell, even the lovesick bastard from the other day had sulked and said he would challenge me to some shitty duel over his precious Haku-chan. I did tell him he was welcome to marry the guy, but lovesick dude wouldn't hear of it. He was so old-fashioned, he really _did_ plan to challenge me to a fight.

Heh. Whatever floats his boat.

By lunch time, I was too tired to even eat one of my rare days of special meals; a steaming hot bowl of shrimp _tempura udon_. I swirled the noodles within the soup, around and around absently with my chopsticks and wondered if I could at least sleep for five minutes before having to begin the dishwashing for lunch. I was back in my storage room hiding place, but too weary to even climb up the ladder to the roof. I settled for slumping onto an upturned crate, and was just about to shove some noodles into my mouth when the door creaked open and Shikamaru's silhouette flooded my sanctuary.

"May we join you?"

"Huh?" _We?_ Who the hell was he bringing in…?

"Hello, Naruto-kun!"

Of course. Who else?

"Found him loitering around the grounds looking for you," Shikamaru explained as if comparing Haku to a lost puppy of some sort, which wouldn't be too far from the truth. The guy looked absolutely giddy to be in such a dump for reasons beyond me.

As usual, neither waited for me to give them the 'yay' or 'nay' to disturb my solitude, as they began to drag empty crates toward me. They also had their lunches with them. Shikamaru I was used to, but Haku was surprising considering he must have had some explaining to do about leaving the dining room with his food.

"I usually do that anyway," Haku said; making me wonder if I had asked my question aloud in the first place. "Sometimes I just go to the dining room to pick up my food and Sasuke-sama's food and take it back to his place."

"He doesn't eat with them?" I asked with a raised brow. Like I gave a shit whether Mr. High and Mighty ate with them or not, and yet I _still_ wanted to know the answer.

Haku was shaking his head. "Not all the time…well, it's been a while actually. He doesn't like eating with the officers…"

I snorted. Typical. "Thinks he's too good for them, I'll bet," I mumbled and shoved some more noodles in my mouth.

"…because they don't like him being with them," he finished quietly, and dare I say…sadly.

There was an awkward pause, in which Shikamaru and I exchanged looks of bewilderment at this revelation before he shrugged and continued eating.

"Well…you can't really blame them," I began carefully; trying to frame my words in such a way that it wouldn't sound…insensitive. "I mean…he is their boss and I guess they…uh…respect him…or whatever."

Haku opened his mouth to say something, but seemed to decide against it. He simply shook his head and began to pick at his noodles. For some reason, I suddenly felt like apologizing to him. Seeing him look despondent got me down a little, and I found myself wanting to make him smile again.

"Hey," I said with a perkiness I didn't quite feel inside. "What's with all the decorations I've seen some of the prisoners putting up around the grounds? I know it's not for Christmas, since that's past already."

This did the trick as Haku looked up with an enthusiastic nod. "It's for the New Year festivities. It's the only time the gates are opened to the general public, and they get to visit the temple, pay their respects and sinners can see their loved ones. It's always a fun day. Isn't it, Shikamaru-kun?"

"It is," Shikamaru agreed with a small smile thrown Haku's way. "The one time of the year this place doesn't look like zombie-land…well until Gudan comes around…"

The last bit was an afterthought, but as soon as he said it, it was enough to bring down the mood again. I could sense him about to apologize, but I interrupted with a wave of my hand. I didn't want to hear it. I knew I was going to die, so being skittish around the topic was only going to do more to aggravate me.

"You know what?" I asked with the chopsticks stuck in the corner of my mouth. "I keep hearing about this damn Gudan thing, and I really don't know what happens in it besides me getting whacked somehow. So what's it like?"

It was now Haku and Shikamaru's turn to exchange bewildered looks, as if unable to believe I really wanted to know more about this damned festival of death. Neither seemed willing to talk first, but eventually, Shikamaru cleared his throat and figured he might as well tell it.

"It happens once a year," he said quietly. "And it's a pretty big deal."

"The whole town and important guests are invited," Haku chirped in; perhaps forgetting he had designated the storytelling to Shikamaru in the first place.

"What he said," Shikamaru continued with a nod. "There's a place about two miles past the East Block, where the outdoor auditorium is. You've seen those movies where gladiators come out to fight in front of the people, right? That's what it looks like pretty much."

I nodded in understanding; though I could feel a certain chill come over me. As they spoke and described the sights and sounds of Gudan, the bravado I had felt earlier was beginning to dissipate faster than I had anticipated. I didn't want to hear anymore, but I had requested this, so I had to suffer through it all. They actually had performers entertain the crowd first, and then all the prisoners were marched out where they were mocked and ridiculed by the crowd for their sins before Lord Orochimaru would pray for their souls and lead them all into a chant where they recanted their sins and prayed for forgiveness to the gods. With that over, it was then time for the final rite; the elimination of your physical body from this earth the only way they knew how.

"…like a deep hole in the middle where…you know…you're beheaded," Shikamaru finished softly.

"Last year it was Hibachi-sama who got to do the honors," Haku mused. "This year, I think Sasuke-sama's going to be doing it again."

_Oh God._ You _have_ got to be fucking kidding me. Not only does he sentence me to death, he gets to have the pleasure of chopping my neck off. Great. Fucking fantastic. I'll bet he's already sharpening his katana, or axe, or whatever the fuck they used, right about now.

"I'm sorry," Haku whimpered as I groaned and covered my face with my hands. My appetite was completely gone. In fact, I was sure I was never going to be able to eat for the rest of my life.

"Maybe we shouldn't have said anything."

"It's okay," I replied with a weak smile and wink. "I asked for it, didn't I?"

"But…" Haku began slowly. He paused and couldn't continue.

"But what?" I encouraged.

"…I do not sense that you are a bad person," he finally finished softly. "I mean…I'm sure you did something bad to be sent here, but you are…different. Perhaps that is what Sasuke-sama saw in you."

"Oh yeah?" I sneered. "Fat load that's doing for me, isn't it? If he senses I'm such a good person, why doesn't he give me my walking papers?" I shook my head and leaned against the piled boxes of canned fruit. "The fact is, he just doesn't give a shit. He's the kind of person that enjoys torturing others and doesn't give a damn about their feelings."

The more I spoke about him, the more agitated I became. His smug visage was firmly planted in my head now, and I wanted nothing more than to -

"But that's not really how he is," came the words that snapped me from my inner rampage. I blinked and stared at the bemused-looking boy before me.

"Sasuke-sama," Haku continued quietly but firmly as if hoping to instill this new concept into my head. "Sasuke-sama is only doing his duty and he has to be firm and cold to those sinners who deserve it."

"You're only saying that because you work with the guy…or wait…" I smirked. "Maybe because you keep his bed warm at night, eh?"

His gasp of shock accompanied by Shikamaru's hissed 'Naruto!' had me wincing inwardly. I could tell I had really hurt the other boy's feelings, and I hated myself for being such an asshole to him especially since he's gone out of his way to be nice to me. He didn't have to come all the way here to eat with me, when he could be in his nice house where it was warm and comfortable.

"Sasuke-sama is not like that," came the cold words as Haku seemed to straighten up; an indignant expression on his visage. In this moment, I could see where strong, deadly fighter persona he could become, and a shiver of awe slid down my spine. "You do not understand him, so you can only sit there and judge him without knowing the truth."

"He judges others," I argued softly. "Don't you think it's a little hypocritical of him as well?"

"That's because he has to do that to survive!" came the sudden bellow that had both me and Shikamaru nearly falling off our crates.

Yikes.

Haku was now on his feet; hands balled into trembling fists at his sides. His large brown eyes were filled with tears of frustration and anger, and again, that overwhelming feeling of wanting to apologize came over me.

"You don't understand," Haku whispered. He angrily wiped away his tears with the sleeve of his shirt. "Sasuke-sama has to be this way or…or…he will no longer be needed."

…what the fuck was he talking about?

"To get back Byaku-Shinkyou, Sasuke-sama has to be this way, but he is not a bad person. He really isn't though he does things he assumes are right. Even he does not realize how much pain he's in. You have no idea how hard it is to listen to him cry in his sleep at night, or for him to wake up from nightmares he can never express to anyone. He goes about day to day with one goal in mind, and that is to one day reclaim a land and clan that is rightfully his! So do not sit there and belittle one of the bravest, strongest, and kindest men I have ever met!"

"Haku…" Shikamaru began, but Haku wasn't hearing any of it. He picked up his bowl and chopsticks and spun on his heels to leave, but not before stopping at the door to look back at us. The hard light of anger had gone to be replaced with a sadness that tore my heart in two.

"I am sorry you are in so much pain as well, Naruto-kun," he said quietly. "But I truly believe that if you really opened your heart and _listened_…you'd see just how alike you two are. Perhaps that is why I was really drawn to you in the first place. In a way…you remind me of Sasuke-sama…but…" He sighed heavily, before finishing weakly. "I can only hope that someday you forgive him. The burden he bears…it is just too much for one man to carry."

Hardly giving us a chance to put in a rebuttal, with a polite bow, he finally left Shikamaru and me in dumbfounded silence. Neither of us said anything for a long time, and it wasn't until I heard the flick of his lighter and the subsequent stench of his cigarette did I finally look up to meet his gaze. As usual, I couldn't really tell what he was thinking; though I had to wonder if he was just as confused as I felt inside.

"Happy now?" came the drawled question as he exhaled some smoke and flicked aside some ash to the ground. "You not only managed to insult the guy, you pretty much made him not want to see your ugly mug ever again."

I opened my mouth to give a wise-assed comeback, but figured it wasn't worth it. Shikamaru was right. I had done something stupid, but still…

"He's got a point you know," Shikamaru continued in that same lazy voice. He was staring at the slats on the ceiling; his features pensive. "About Sasuke."

"Hmph."

"I don't know the whole story but…I do remember reading up someplace that Byaku-Shinkyou belonged to the Uchiha clan. His father used to be commissioner of police or something."

_What's it to me?_ I wanted to ask, but I kept silent; a part of me somewhat eager to know more about this bastard that everyone else seemed to think was some saint behind the devilish persona he presented. I didn't get it.

"Then there was some kind of uprising…no one is sure of who started it or why for that matter, but anyway…his dad…mom…brother…" He made a slicing motion across his neck, causing me to give a reluctant shudder. "All of them killed in front of him, I heard. If that don't give you the trauma of a lifetime, I don't know what does."

I bit my lower lip; my gaze focused on the dusty floor. It was almost the same with Sakura. Having to watch the one you love being killed in front of you was simply…indescribable. And yet the guy had to watch his entire family be butchered in front of him when he was probably a kid. I hadn't known my father, and my mother had passed away before I was old enough to really comprehend the concept of death, so how could I really relate? I wasn't there when the old man who raised me…well dumped me with his sister…had passed away, and Kojima really didn't count as family. I could only compare the pain and suffering to losing Sakura, but even at that…

_Blood is thicker…_

"Is that what qualifies him to be such a dick?" I muttered; not wanting this side of me to pity him. Besides, I'm sure he didn't need anyone's pity.

"Is that what qualifies _you_ to be such a dick as well?" Shikamaru flung back at me with a wry smile. "You weren't this annoying…well maybe you were, but you weren't this cynical were you? The circumstances have warped your thinking and made you this stubborn, hasn't it? Put yourself in his shoes, you jerk. You grow up in this kind of environment…" He waved his hand about. "…even I would have killed myself a long time ago. I wouldn't stand it."

"Look," He leaned forward and crushed out his cigarette on the ground. "I'm not trying to get you to feel sorry for him. The guy has done some dick-headed things before, but…to be honest, besides his job, he barely hangs around the grounds much or bothers anyone." Shikamaru shrugs. "Never seen him hang around with anyone his age, or even crack a smile that wasn't as cold as fucking ice. Your pains are physical, but like Haku said…his must go way deeper than mere whips and unwanted violations. In time your wounds will heal…not all of them if you know what I mean…but what's he got to heal his?"

"What's he waiting for?" I suddenly blurted out in frustrated anger. I really did not like the way their words were getting to me. Why were they both trying to make him the victim when I was the one going to die in the long…short run? "If he's so intent on reclaiming his fucking clan or whatever, what's he waiting for? He's practically living next to the guy running the show, he can just take a knife and stab him while he sleeps, can't he?"

"Keep your goddamn voice down!" Shikamaru hissed. "Do you think what you've said hasn't been tried before?"

"Huh?"

"Asuma told me that there were a group of officers who tried to kill Lord Orochimaru…start some kind of mutiny against him. Guess what happened?"

I could figure out what must have happened, but Shikamaru told me anyway.

"They found their heads stuck on poles and placed in the middle of town for all to see. That is what happens when you stand against Lord Orochimaru. That's what Haku was trying to tell you. Sasuke can't just wake up one morning and decide to kill the guy. Orochimaru is one smart asshole and would have already thought ten steps ahead of Sasuke, and besides, there are many officers and guards here who are on his side. If Sasuke dared to do anything that brash, he wouldn't make it out of here alive. It's like he's stuck between a rock and a hard place. Do you get it now?"

I closed my eyes…took a deep breath…and tried to reorganize my thoughts. I got it. I more than got it, but still…what was I expected to do? What could I do in my situation? I was nothing more than a man on death row. I doubted I would get to see him again until Gudan, and even if I did end up seeing him by some 'accident'…what the fuck was I going to say to him?

"_Oh hey, no hard feelings, eh? I know you're going through some shit and you had no choice but to sentence me to death just because you're having a bad day, and it's cool. Just you know…when you behead me or whatever, get it right the first time, okay? Multiple chops is just going to make a damn mess and it's gonna hurt like a bitch too. So…"_

"NARUTO, YOU LAZY, GOD-FOR-NOTHING BASTARD! WHERE ARE YOU? WE NEED YOU IN THE KITCHEN, GODAMNNIT!"

I lifted my lashes as reality – in the form of the assistant head chef – came crashing through my wild thoughts. Fat chance of that conversation ever taking place between me and Mr. Life Sucks For Me Too. I sighed and rose to my feet; allowing Shikamaru to walk ahead of me. I was at least grateful he didn't pester me for a definitive answer, because I still didn't know what the hell any of them wanted me to do. Did they really assume that I could do anything to help him with his goal? It was just too ridiculous to comprehend.

I had no intention of becoming Uchiha Sasuke's savior because he sure as hell wasn't looking out for my ass. He would just have to figure out a way to fight his battles on his own. God knows I had too much on my plate to deal with right about now.

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke:<em>

It was almost too easy.

Even before I had pep-talked myself into seeing Orochimaru's face – in my quest to seek permission to go sightseeing - Kimimaro was meeting me half-way across the corridor with a smile on his visage.

"He's even organized a personal driver to take you around the city," the white-haired man had said. However, not wanting anyone to know my whereabouts, I declined the offer, choosing instead to use the buses or trains and to experience the city life without their help.

I was told I could take a bus about a block away from where we were staying, and the bus would take me to the train station. I was already used to being in a bus, but unlike the crowded, stuffy and unpleasant rides from police station to station, it was refreshing to be in a 'normal' bus with people who didn't smell like they hadn't taken a shower in weeks.

I didn't know how to react to the appreciative glances that came my way, and settled for not giving them any encouragement one way or another. It wasn't as if I stood out from any other male in the vicinity. I had chosen to wear a non-descript pair of black trousers and a dark blue sweater, and though I felt ridiculous wearing the sunglasses (it really wasn't that sunny outside), it was to protect my still sensitive eyes. I suffered some teenage girls giggling behind their hands as I struggled to ask them the way to _Saiho-ji_ temple. Girls were bemusing creatures. It seemed like saying a word to them got them flustered or babbling like idiots. By the time I could finally get proper directions from a security guard, I couldn't believe I was more than eager to see Ino again. She seemed to be the most reasonable person on the planet.

Arriving at the famous temple was an experience like no other. Though it was not as big as the one in Byaku-Shinkyou, it was still impressive enough to have me awed at its majestic beauty. Surrounded by towering trees, it was hard to believe that this nook of heaven was close to a bustling city, and though there were other visitors/tourists, there was a quiet reverence about them as they walked or sat and paid homage in silence.

At the entrance there was a line of waiting patrons, and when it finally came to my turn, I bowed respectfully before stepping into the sacred grounds. There was a large _temizu_ basin where about five of us (at a time) began the ritual of purification. You were to wash your left hand first, then your right, then your mouth with the ladle provided. I tried not to concentrate too hard on what had transpired last night with Orochimaru and Ino, but settled on begging for forgiveness for allowing my sinful lustful desires to overwhelm me completely. I felt a little better as I approached the shrine, where I rung the bell, made a donation, clapped my hands twice and prayed as hard as I could for a fresh start.

I could see some other visitors tying their fortunes, but since I really had nothing to say per se, I settled for caressing the charm Asuma had given me. It was practically burning a hole in my pocket, and a quick glance at my watch showed that it was almost time for my rendezvous with Ino (I had arrived almost two hours too early). I decided to kill time by visiting each of the three tea houses (_Shonan-tei_, _Shoan-do_, and _Tanhoku-tei_) where beautiful and graceful geishas served me with the finest tea I had ever tasted. After quick stops at the study and the three-storied pagoda (I wished I had brought a camera with me), I headed toward the famous moss gardens where my breath was promptly taken away.

The pictures on the brochure did not do it any justice at all. In here, far from the polluted sounds of city life, I was transported back in time. There was no sound (despite two or three other humans around me) besides the tittering of the birds, the soft whispers of the tree leaves, and the soothing yet barely audible trickle of water cascading down ancient rocks and into the still pond. According to the brochure, the moss was supposedly made up of over 120 different varieties, and the temptation to touch it was too much to overcome. It felt like a carpet made of velvet; a sight and sensation that would be imprinted in my mind forever.

I noticed the bridge Ino had talked about, and made my way there with five minutes to spare. From this vantage point, I could make out the shape of the pond in its entirety. Like the brochure had said, it was indeed shaped like the Chinese character for 'heart', and the three small islands made for a picturesque scene.

_Romantic…_

Was that why she chose this particular location? That wouldn't surprise me in the slightest. The ambience in here did give one the illusion that it was made for lovers. However, this was a place of sacred rites and holiness. I doubted anyone would have the intention of perfuming sexual or deviant arts in such a setting. Either way…

_Where was she?_

She didn't seem like the kind of girl who would keep anyone waiting. I told myself that perhaps she was caught up with shopping and had forgotten about our meeting, so I decided to give her thirty more minutes.

2:45pm. Ino was still not here.

I could feel a dull sense of foreboding, but I squashed it aside and tried to keep myself upbeat and positive. She would show up. She couldn't have gotten cold feet. I had so many questions to ask her, and this would or might be my only chance to know exactly what was going on with Orochimaru and Danzo. Whatever group she was a part of…they were not out for me…if so, she would have taken her opportunity to eliminate me in my moment of weakness. Besides, if Asuma was a part of them too…he had made no moves to kill me either.

3:30pm. Still no sign of her.

I had been pacing the bridge ever so often, ignoring the curious glances from other visitors who walked past as my agitation and worry grew. Where the hell could she be? I had no other means of contacting her except going back to the house and perhaps meeting her there. This would have been a complete waste of time. Why would she ask me to come here and then not show up? Whatever admiration I had once had for her was fading fast. I was becoming irritated and hungry. I had deliberately skipped lunch just so I could perhaps ask her to join me for something to eat. It was the least I could have done.

By 4.42pm, I decided to leave. It wasn't worth it anymore.

Feeling oddly dejected and cold (more thanks to the fast approaching evening), I made my way back to the house; stopping only to grab a quick bite at a roadside stall that sold some rather delicious _dango_. I have no idea why I still bought two extra, which I wrapped and placed within my jacket to give her later. I'm sure she would have a good explanation for missing our meeting. She might have been made to work extra long hours at the house…or maybe asked to go shopping somewhere else. One never knew with servants. I had to give her the benefit of the doubt.

"Did you have fun?" came the first question posed to me as I stepped into the compound and met Kimimaro sipping some tea (or maybe sake) on the patio. Orochimaru was not with him. Surprising.

"It was…all right," I replied with a light shrug. I began to walk past him, but not before asking flippantly. "Where's Orochimaru?"

"He's been in meetings all day, but then again…you wouldn't have noticed considering how much fun you had last night with your new girlfriend."

I froze in mid stride; my heart skipping a beat before pounding hard and fast as he chuckled and took another sip of his drink. He…he _knew?_ How…!

"It's nothing to be ashamed of, Sasuke," the bastard continued with a playful wink. "Congratulations on finally losing your virginity."

"Shu…shut up!" I hissed; though I felt I was going to go up in flames of embarrassment. "How did you…?"

"Well, Lord Orochimaru and I were taking a night walk and overheard the moans and groans and -"

I slapped a hand over his mouth to silence him. I wanted to die of humiliation. "How dare you listen in to…!"

"Not all of it," he stated as he pushed my hand away with a laugh. "Just enough to fuel our imaginations. Lord Orochimaru was so proud of you -"

"Shut the fuck up!"

His laughter followed me as I strode into my bedroom and nearly tore the shoji screen off its hinges as I slammed it shut behind me. My head was aching badly, and I wanted nothing more than to go back to my safe haven…back to Byaku-Shinkyou and as far away from all this. I groaned and flopped onto my back; wincing as the sticks of dango dug into my ribs. I had forgotten all about those –

"Sasuke-sama?"

I looked up with the hope that it would be Ino, but as the door slid open quietly, it was the other girl. Kaname or whatever her name was. She was on her knees with her head bowed.

"Would Sasuke-sama like a bath this evening?"

"Yes…but I would prefer Ino to assist me with it."

Her head remained lowered, but I might have missed the tightening of her lips, or maybe it was just a trick of the light. "Sorry to have to say this, Sasuke-sama, but…Ino no longer works here."

I raised a brow in confusion and disbelief. "What do you mean?"

She looked up then; her eyes filled with tears. "We discovered that she was out to kill you, Sasuke-sama. I found this hidden within her clothes and reported it to Lord Orochimaru, who fired her promptly."

She held out a piece of paper, which I snatched from her quickly as I rose to my feet. The words blurred before my vision, and I had to take off the sunglasses to be sure I wasn't seeing things.

_Failed in attempt to kill Lord Sasuke last night._

_Will try later today when we meet at Saiho-ji temple._

_If unsuccessful, I will proceed to Plan B._

Plan B? Plan…B? I don't understand this. She had given no indication that she planned to kill me last night, and besides, hadn't she promised to tell me all about this organization that Asuma was a part of? Why would she go through all that trouble? Was she lying all that time as well?

"I can see that you are shocked, Sasuke-sama," the girl was saying as she made an attempt to reach out to me. "Let me help you…"

"Don't touch me," I snarled and slapped her hand away, ignoring her wince and expression of pain. Something didn't feel right, and this sniveling woman wasn't helping matters. "Get out," I commanded coldly. "And do not return until you are sent for. Is that clear?"

"Yes…yes, my Lord."

She bowed politely and left as quietly as she had entered; leaving me cold and bereft.

With Ino gone, I would now never know the truth. I felt hurt and betrayed; dismayed that a moment of weakness had led me to give myself to a woman who was willing to carry out such a diabolical plan in the first place. And yet…

_Some things are simply not adding up._

(Un)Fortunately, I would be spared the chore of seeking her and demanding answers, as one of the male servants soon arrived with the curt message from Orochimaru that our mini-vacation was now officially over. Lord Orochimaru was apparently done with whatever meetings and goals he had set out to accomplish, and I was to begin packing my things in preparation for the trip.

We would be leaving on the first train back to Byaku-Shinkyou in the morning, and though I hated to admit that I had been mildly homesick, I couldn't wait to get back to my only sanctuary.


	11. 11: Revelations

**Notes: **So happy to see you new readers and your feedback! I really appreciate you taking the time to check out the story and enjoying it so far. This is another loaded chapter, so read slowly and carefully...and with your coffee in hand or something *lol* And what happened to your PM, my BFFFFF from another planet? Couldn't respond to your PM for some reason. =/ Anyway, thank you again for such kind words and your feedback! YOU ALL make this writing process so much fun!

Enjoy! XD

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><p><strong>Chapter 11: Revelations<strong>

_I have always known  
>That at last I would<br>Take this road, but yesterday  
>I did not know that it would be today.<em>

_-Narihira_

* * *

><p><em>Kaname: <em>

Gnawing nervously on her fingernails, she dared to steal a peek through the blinds of the window; watching as Lord Orochimaru and his company were finally ushered into the waiting car bound for the train station. She kept telling herself that she had done the right thing; that she had only tried to keep Sasuke-sama out of trouble from the wiles of that slut. It had absolutely nothing to do with jealousy or the realization that Sasuke-sama had chosen that lying whore instead of her. Hadn't she done all she could to get his attention? Hadn't she given him the signals that she was ready and willing to be the one to keep his bed warm at night? And yet he had decided to go with the 'supposed' timid, new-girl-on-the-block. It was enough to get her furious all over again.

She should have put two and two together the moment Ino had walked into the inn, two weeks ago, seeking a position. Of course then, Kaname hadn't known her real name was _Ino_, neither had she known that the black wig only hid the thick blond hair beneath. She had taken 'Haruko' under her wings, always ready and willing to teach the younger girl all she knew. She had imparted her wisdom about dealing with different kind of guests; warning her against the advances of rich, greedy men who only wanted to use her body. As a servant, she had to keep her distance yet show humility as necessary. They might not be geishas, but they were to carry themselves like one. 'Haruko' had been such an eager student, Kaname hadn't thought twice about any ulterior motives. Her soft-spoken voice and her inability to look into anyone's eyes for longer than a few seconds, had revealed a girl who was naïve and easy bait for anyone willing to take advantage. 'Haruko' had revealed that she had no parents or siblings, and Kaname had even considered 'adopting' the younger girl as a sister.

It was the betrayal that hurt the most.

That all this time she had pretended to be naïve and shy, 'Haruko' had been busy wooing the handsome, brave, and very eligible bachelor, Sasuke-sama, behind her back. It wasn't as if 'Haruko' didn't know that Kaname had her eyes set on the young man. In fact, she had confided her secret desires to become _Uchiha Kaname_ as long as she played her cards right. So if she was older than Sasuke-sama by two years? That didn't matter in this day and age. That bitch must have laughed in secret all that time.

_I shouldn't have sent her to Sasuke-sama,_ she thought bitterly. _I should have gone myself. Maybe things would have been different._

Indeed it might have, who knows? It was all because the men had returned quite late from their outing, and Kaname was too tired to get off her futon. In her laziness, she had shaken 'Haruko' awake to take over. She was sure nothing would happen as Sasuke-sama had barely given 'Haruko' a glance all this time, and there was no doubt he'd probably kick her out and want to do things on his own as usual.

She had gone back to sleep…but only for a short while. She couldn't tell you what made her wake up at that ungodly hour, but she had lifted her weary lashes with a sense that something wasn't quite right. For starters, 'Haruko's' futon was empty. Kaname was sure she had sent the girl to welcome Sasuke-sama quite some time ago, and a quick glance at the table clock in their small room confirmed her doubts.

_Where in the world was she? Lost again? _

'Haruko' had the annoying tendency to wander off for several hours at a time, always returning with a sheepish expression and saying 'I got lost'. Kaname would be exasperated at those times, but otherwise, she always forgave 'Haruko' for her innocence. Besides, it was hard to stay upset with the quiet girl. Tonight, however, there was just no excuse.

Grumbling beneath her breath, Kaname got off her futon, shuffled into her slippers and went in search of her elusive companion. She checked the bathroom, but it was empty. The kitchen yielded nothing either. The compound was relatively large, and as she walked across the courtyard – and past the area where Sasuke-sama's private quarters were – she just happened to glance towards the shoji screen doors…and would have probably looked away, if it wasn't for the 'odd' shadows being created by the occupant(s) inside. She froze in her tracks; unsure of what she was actually seeing. Had Sasuke-sama returned with a woman? That was definitely unlike him considering all the signals he had given since he arrived. He didn't seem like the sort of person who would dare to bring a random woman to his bedroom, and besides Sasuke-sama was too classy to deal with a cheap whore from the street.

_Still…_

She found herself tiptoeing closer to the screen door; making sure she was not heard or noticed by anyone. Keeping to the shadows, she just about became invisible to anyone who might have walked past, but that was the least of her worries now. As she knelt beside the door and slid it open – just a little – she was able to get a good look (well as good as it could possibly be with only one eye) at what was taking place. What she saw nearly made her scream in shock, dismay, and downright fury! For starters, who was the blond woman clearly kneeling between Sasuke-sama's spread thighs and…and…and…

_Urgh._ Just thinking about it made her cover her mouth and turn away for a second, but it didn't help. The sounds that were emanating from the room; his low moans of pleasure (and how delicious did he look with his eyes closed and his head thrown back; revealing that strong neck attached to that torso she would have loved to worship) and the sucking sounds from the slut, made her bite her lower lip hard. She had no idea who this woman was, and she might have slid the door shut to tiptoe away again, when the blonde finally lifted her head a little and the glow from the lantern hit her very familiar features.

…Haruko? _HARUKO?_ But…but…how? Why…? How is she…? Wait a minute…she's…_blonde?_

Feeling herself becoming numb with disbelief and shock, Kaname strained to look around the room and finally noticed the black mound (which at first looked like a large rat), but was actually the wig 'Haruko' must have been wearing all this time. Slowly, she slid the door shut, but was unable to move from her spot; trying hard to digest what was transpiring.

_She lied. She lied. She lied. She's a liar. A liar. A liar. A liar. A big, fat, good-for-nothing liar! She must have known that Sasuke-sama was coming and had already planned ahead to work here just to get her filthy paws on him. _

The seeds of jealousy now taking root, Kaname bit hard on her fingernails unaware of the tiny droplets of blood forming as her teeth continued to burrow themselves into her flesh. Vaguely she listened to their consummation; her eyes, head and entire being burning with the intensity of her anger. She had to do something to teach the little bitch a lesson, but what? Reveal to Lord Orochimaru that the girl was a liar? It wouldn't be the first time some girl had lied to get an opportunity to work in such a lofty position, so that wasn't good enough. She had do something else; something that would tarnish Haruko's reputation beyond repair. She would make Sasuke-sama loathe her. Make him never want to see her face ever again.

When the conversation started, Kaname had to literally force herself out of the depths of her darkened stupor of hate, to grasp the gist of what they were saying. She found it odd that Sasuke-sama kept calling her 'Enoh', but Kaname could only assume that the slut was lying to him again about her real name. Hell, was 'Haruko' even her real name? She was finding it damn hard to believe anything coming out of that girl's mouth now. However, her night of many surprises wasn't over yet. Just when it seemed like Enoh/Haruko was getting ready to leave (and Kaname was already trying to find a way to escape without being seen), the conversation took a turn for the worst…or better depending on how you looked at things.

You couldn't have given her better fodder if you tried. Like a Cheshire cat getting its first taste of milk, Kaname grinned in pleasure and realized that the gods had finally favored her cause. She knew it was going to be a stretch, but she was sure she could pull it off. All she had to do was write a note as 'Enoh/Haruko' and show it to Sasuke-sama when he awakened. There was no way he'd want to see Enoh/Haruko after that.

She snickered to herself and tiptoed away from the door; nearly skipped down the patio and ran across the courtyard…only to find herself slamming hard into something tall, warm, and strong as she made the turn towards her quarters.

"Steady there," came the low deep voice, which had her looking up with mild panic. It was Kimimaro-sama, and right behind him was Lord Orochimaru himself. Her eyes widened and on autopilot, she fell to her knees before the couple; wondering why the hell they were up and about at this hour.

"My apologies, my Lords," she stuttered. "I did not see you…"

"Hardly surprising considering you seemed to be in quite a hurry." It was Lord Orochimaru's accusing tone that had the chill of fear creeping down her spine. He had never addressed her directly before; preferring to use Kimimaro as his mouthpiece, and even now his tone held disdain which made her feel cheap and unimportant.

"What were you doing in the guests' private quarters?" came the cold question that had her biting her lower lip in worry. What could she say? That she was spying on Sasuke-sama? There was no doubt she'd be in serious trouble if she said that aloud, so thinking quickly…

"It is the woman I work with, my Lords," she blurted; barely lifting her gaze off their sandaled feet. "I woke up and saw that her futon was empty, and in my worry, I went to search for her only to discover she was with Sasuke-sama. I…I think…I think she might be a spy."

Since she wasn't looking up, she failed to see the effect her words had on the men, especially the older one. Orochimaru's lips tightened as he glanced toward Sasuke's area; his eyes flashing with an emotion that was a cross between fury and faint amusement.

"A spy, hmm?" he rasped softly. "And what makes you say that?"

"I…I…overheard her saying that she plans to meet Sasuke-sama tomorrow at the Saiho-ji temple…something about being in some organization and something about a charm…I did not really catch all of it, my Lords, but I think Sasuke-sama's in trouble, and I wanted to warn you be…before it was too late."

With her heart pounding hard within her chest, Kaname held her breath and waited for their verdict; wondering if they'd believe her story. For a long minute, neither man said anything, and feeling that she was being scrutinized, she continued quickly.

"Also she claimed to be called Haruko when her real name might be Ino. She's always wearing a wig! Her real hair is blonde, not black. I knew something was wrong when she suddenly showed up out of the blue about two weeks ago saying she wanted to work here, and -"

"That will be enough," Kimimaro ordered with a quick glance at Orochimaru, who was still glaring coldly at Sasuke's quarters. "You may leave now. Your loyalty will be greatly rewarded."

"Than…thank you, my Lords."

She staggered to her feet; her knees still shaking as she backed away from the men now making their way towards Sasuke-sama's room. What would happen now? Would they accost the slut and try to get her to confess? Would they call her back to confront Haruko/Ino? If so, would she be ready to deal with whatever accusations are hurled at her? Not waiting to find out, she spun on her heels and all but ran back to her side of the compound.

Sleep was impossible for the rest of the night (well…wee hours of the morning). She remained burrowed beneath her blanket; eyes wide and body tense as she watched the door in case Haruko…

_Ino, damnit! Her name is Ino!_

…would come walking through it with eyes filled with hurt and guilt. Either way, Kaname felt she was ready. She told herself she would be in control if Ino showed up with that kind of attitude. It was her fault for giving herself up to Sasuke-sama like a cheap slut. He deserved so much better.

However, by the crack of dawn and as the first rays of sunlight filtered through the windows…there was still no sign of Ino. Her futon still lay as in its tousled state; her personal items still in their places. There was something rather haunting about them now, and Kaname had the sinking feeling that she might never see the blonde again. All the same, she had to be sure that Sasuke-sama had no more contact with her ever again. With fingers that trembled, she penned the note; hoping it sounded as sinister as she made it seem. She had never seen Ino's handwriting before, but she doubted Sasuke-sama would care since he had probably not seen it either. All that was left was presenting it to him with her made up story.

The day went as slow as molasses. Everything made her jump ten feet in apprehension. She steered clear from the living quarters of Lord Orochimaru and Sasuke-sama; keeping herself busy doing odd jobs around the compound while watching the clock with growing anxiety. By six in the evening, she was officially a nervous wreck, and walking back to their sleeping quarters did not help either.

Ino's things were gone.

Not a single thing left. It was as if she hadn't even existed in the first place.

_Oh God…What have I done?_ Kaname's mind screamed, though she took a deep breath and kept her wits about her; telling herself that Ino was probably fired and nothing else. It was the story she'd tell Sasuke-sama later, although his reaction was not what she had really expected. Whatever transpired last night between them, it was clear that she was a little too late. Ino had managed to ensnare Sasuke-sama within her sleazy clutches. All men were pawns.

_Pity your precious Ino is no longer coming back,_ she had thought bitterly. _Wherever she is, I hope she burns in hell._

With a heavy sigh, she closed the blinds and crept back beneath the blanket; idly wondering why Lord Orochimaru preferred to travel at night or in the wee hours of the morning. Maybe it was because of his pale skin. No wonder he always wore long sleeves and kept indoors most of the time. Still, she was disappointed that her plans with Sasuke-sama had not gone well. Not only had he not even bothered to thank her for her services, but his handsome face had been filled with an undecipherable expression she had struggled to make sense of. Hurt? Anger? Confusion? Sadness? She couldn't tell, but at this moment, she didn't care. She would probably never see him again, which was a damn pity.

He really would have made the perfect husband…

* * *

><p>…later that night, while in the throes of dreamless sleep, Ishikawa Kaname would barely feel the katana's fine blade slicing neatly through her neck. One thing she could at least be grateful for…it had been a quick and painless death.<p>

* * *

><p><em>Orochimaru and Kimimaro:<em>

Kimimaro listened intently and with a light grunt, hung up the phone before turning back to face his companion.

"It's been done," he announced quietly.

"Good," Orochimaru replied absently as he turned to another page of the book he was reading. He was now clad in a golden silk caftan; his raven hair undone to fall around his face and shoulders. He barely flinched as Kimimaro slid back into the bed beside him, neither did he pay much attention as he felt the strong but warm arms wrap themselves around his waist. God help him, but Kimimaro could be incredibly clingy when he chose to be. It was a trait he had at first thought endearing, but now…

"…did we really have to kill her?" came the sudden low question that him stiffening. Not this again.

"I've already explained myself to you," Orochimaru growled softly. The train gave a little jolt and nearly had him hitting his head against the headboard. Shit. He really hated traveling. "That woman knew too much."

"And Ino…"

"If she's not dead by now, she's a stronger woman than I give her credit for. She's still not confessed to working for Danzo, has she?"

Kimimaro shook his head. "The interrogators say she has revealed nothing. Whatever organization she works for…they must have trained her very well."

Orochimaru snorted. "Danzo thinks he's got the upper hand, but he doesn't realize I am one step ahead of him. Sending his spy to woo Sasuke, huh? The conniving little toad."

Kimimaro bit his lower lip as he watched the cold expression on his lover's visage. A sadistic thrill went down his spine; knowing whenever his master was in this mood, their lovemaking tended to be a journey through the most intense pleasure yet pain. All the same, he knew he was walking a thin line when it came to his master's desires. Though he had learned over the years that Orochimaru's sadistic nature involved teasing him with other lovers, Kimimaro bore it as best he could. His pain ran even deeper whenever he watched his master's interaction with Sasuke. He had told himself over the years that Sasuke was merely a means to an end to Orochimaru's grand schemes, but as the boy grew older and became more of a man, Kimimaro was sure that his master had feelings that now went beyond the superficial. He would even consider it 'love', although such a word seemed odd to be associated with a man who rarely used it. Orochimaru was yet to say those three words to him in all their years of being together, but Kimimaro didn't mind. He would say it enough for both of them, for as long as he could until he was eventually discarded.

Fighting down the bout of self-loathing that came with this thought, he moaned and writhed suggestively against the slender yet sinewy length of his master's body; wishing he could rip off the cloth to savor that pale, cold flesh only he was capable of warming.

"Japan needs strong leaders," Orochimaru began lecturing (as usual). He could literally smell the need for sex oozing off Kimimaro, and who was he to decline such tempting invitation? Tossing the book to the side, he reached out to cup Kimimaro's chin tightly; his long fingernails digging into the younger man's flesh. "Do you know why we are in such a deep depression, my dear? It's because this great nation is weak because of pathetic leaders like Shimura Danzo. He thinks that just because Fugaku found favor with him, he can control _me_ and the rest of his cohorts? He's sadly mistaken."

Kimimaro's low groan of pain was lost as Orochimaru sealed his lips in a kiss that was nothing short of bruising. However, in this very moment, he was not seeing the white-haired man at all, but the dark-haired heir who had given him a thrill the other night. _Finally_ touching Sasuke for the first time had set a fire deep within him that he wanted to explore all over again. It was an intoxicating rush he had not felt in a long time, and goodness knew he needed to taste that frigid bastard until he was drunk on his essence.

However, learning of that traitor's audacity in claiming Sasuke's treasured virginity; something he had waited all these years to have the pleasure of taking eventually, had triggered a hate so deep within him, the question of pardoning the girl's life had been out of the question. Not only would she be dealt with for her lies, but if she ended up losing her life, it was no big loss. Sasuke _belonged_ to him and no other, and in due time…

"Aaah…Orochimaru-sama…oh God…I'm…I'm coming…!"

He stared dispassionately at the heaving man beneath him; watching with bored fascination as his penis continued to drill into the plaint hole he had used and abused all these years. He imagined Sasuke in this position; something that was considerably easier to do now after seeing the younger man's face flushed with desire. In due time, he would discard Kimimaro. He might be an indispensable fighter, but when it came to his duties in the bedroom, Orochimaru knew it was time for a change. He would take an intense pleasure breaking that uptight little brat into tiny pieces. He would prove that being with a strong, virile man was ten…no…a million times better than being pleasured by some weak female.

_How dare she!_

It was with that fury that he brutally took Kimimaro to his orgasm; finishing with a hard bite on the white-haired man's shoulder where the blood that flowed was swallowed with relish.

_In due time, Sasuke. In due time._

For making Uchiha Sasuke his complete and loyal slave, was only the first step in taking hold of a nation and a power he so desperately needed.

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke:<em>

"Welcome back, Sasuke-sama!"

"You don't have to sound so happy to see me," came the low grumble as Sasuke walked up the steps and onto the patio, where his ever faithful manservant knelt waiting with a smile on his features. He hated to admit that a part of him felt good at the warm welcome; considering how morose he had felt throughout the train ride.

Every waking hour had been spent mulling over the supposed note from Ino and trying to decipher what it could mean. He really did not understand why she'd go through all the trouble of 'comforting' him all under the guise of wanting to kill him at the same time. It just didn't make any sense. He had detected no evil around her; not that his eyes were in any way, shape, or form ready to look that deep into her heart. Her emotions had seemed genuine, and he realized that if indeed she had planned to kill him, and everything that had transpired that night had been nothing more than a joke…

_(it hurt)_

…how could he ever trust anyone that intimately again? It was definitely punishment from the gods for his transgressions. That he would willingly fall into the lust of the flesh at a whim…this was what he deserved. Hadn't he been warned by the Great Priests? Hadn't the Great Book outlined the possibility of this happening?

"Is my bath ready?" he asked wearily, while shrugging out of his clothes. He couldn't wait to get back to wearing his comfortable kimonos and uniforms. Just three days of trying to look 'western' and he was this close to going nuts.

As he flung his clothes this way and that, Haku darted around picking them up. "Yes, my Lord," he replied as he reached for the belt…and then jeans…and then socks. As he moved, he couldn't help watching and noticing something a little different about his mater's body language. It wasn't so much that he sounded distracted, but there was something in his behavior…no…his walk perhaps…an extra hint of swagger that hadn't been there before. Haku wondered if seeing the 'outside world' had created this slight change. Whatever it was though, he only hoped that Sasuke-sama had enjoyed himself. Goodness knew he had definitely had some fun during his days off. He smiled softly to himself as he recalled the conversations had with his somewhat new friend, Uzumaki Naruto. He knew he had gone out of line speaking about his master like that – especially to a sinner set for Gudan, but there was just something about the blond young man with the scarred face and breathtaking blue eyes, which made him want to talk and talk and talk and never stop. Given the right situation or circumstances (as in, if they weren't in such different stages of their lives), Haku was sure they would have been the best of friends. He really did like Uzumaki Naruto even though he had such a rude/dirty mouth that needed to be washed out with soap.

He giggled behind his hand as he remembered a particularly dirty joke Naruto had told him earlier in the day. He was so lost in his memory of their conversation, he failed to notice the puzzled look his master was giving him. As Sasuke tied the small towel around his waist – after his quick bath – and headed towards the onsen, he tapped Haku's head lightly as he walked past.

"What's so funny? You look like you're a good mood."

Haku, who had been kneeling at the entrance to the onsen, looked up with a start; his visage turning a bright crimson as he was given a good view of his master's very toned derriere when the towel was removed. Lowering his gaze, he cleared his throat and lied about his true thoughts.

"I was just excited about the New Year festivities taking place on Saturday. Just seems like yesterday we were celebrating the last one, doesn't it, Sasuke-sama?"

Sasuke gave a non-committal grunt and sunk blissfully into the waters, his eyes closing with relief as all his non-physical aches and weariness from the journey seemed to melt away. He covered his eyes with the small washcloth and tried to ignore the fact that in less than three weeks – thanks to that bastard and Danzo – the much darker yet spiritual rites of Gudan would begin. He wondered how Haku would react if he told him the news now. He knew Haku wasn't really a big fan of the event anyway.

"…if the Enka dancers will come?" Haku was muttering to himself. He seemed to have forgotten he was talking to his master. "Last year, they were so entertaining, and I told Naruto-kun all about it, but he said he had seen even better dancers when he was in Osaka. It's a pity he won't be able to wat…"

Sasuke, who had been dozing off to be honest (since Haku's solo chit chats could run on for quite a while), sat up with a jolt at one particular section of Haku's soliloquy. He removed the washcloth from his eyes and gawked at his clueless manservant. Had he been hearing things or had Haku actually mentioned…_Uzumaki Naruto_? And not just that, but actually calling him _Naruto-kun_? As if they were… _friends?_

"Haku."

"Hmm…I mean, yes, my Lord?"

"…what did you do while I was away?"

Haku could feel the rush of blood creeping up his neck, and he stubbornly kept his gaze lowered to the stone floor.

"Haku…" Sasuke cajoled with a hard edge in his voice. "Where did you go while I was away?"

"Just to the dining hall, my Lord…and…and around the grounds…" he finished weakly. Oh God. What had he said? He had been so lost in his excitement about the festivities, and having to watch all the sinners help set up the decorations, he hadn't really been paying much attention to half of what he was saying! Had he said something to upset Sasuke-sama? If so…_what_?

"The dining hall…"

"Yes, My Lord…"

"And the grounds…"

"…yes…my Lord."

Sasuke took a deep breath and tried again. "Did you see anyone interesting while walking around the grounds and dining hall, Haku?" He wondered why his heart was beginning to beat a little faster, or why he felt his hands forming tight fists beneath the water. If it turned out that Haku had been interacting with that sinner…

"I met lots of interesting people…"

"Do not play games with me!" he snapped impatiently. "Did you or did you not meet the sinner, Uzumaki Naruto?"

Haku seemed to wilt and he bowed even lower. He did not understand why Sasuke-sama suddenly sounded upset. It was almost the same way Naruto-kun had reacted at the mention of his master. It was clear that both men simply did not like each other, and confessing now that he had spoken to the blond would only make things worse.

"I will accept any punishment, my Lord," he said instead; his forehead now touching the cool stones. "Forgive me for my actions, Sasuke-sama, but I was only trying to be…to be friendly…"

"To a sinner? A murderer? Do you have any idea what you have done?"

"I'm sorry, my Lord."

Sasuke gritted his teeth. "I hope to goodness you've at least purified yourself from spending so much time with them. Perhaps it's best you just stay with them, since you seem to enjoy being around them so much."

Haku looked up with a stricken expression. "My Lord, I will never do it again. I promise you."

Sasuke snorted and closed his eyes again; not really sure why a part of him was actually enjoying torturing Haku this way. Was he really upset that Haku had dared to engage in conversation with the sinner? Or was a part of him actually…_envious?_ that Uzumaki Naruto could talk to Haku without a hint of anger.

_Hmph. Envy._

He snorted in derision. What nonsense. Why did he care if that scarred bastard chose to speak to his manservant? Except…

"What did he say to you?" he blurted out before he could stop himself from asking. He told himself he didn't give a damn whatever that blond fool had to say, and yet curiosity egged him on like an incessant fly buzzing within his mind.

"What did…?" Haku looked bemused.

"The sinner, Uzumaki Naruto," Sasuke stated calmly. He covered his eyes with the washcloth again and pretended not to be interested. "Surely he must have said something of importance to you."

"Oh…well…" Haku paused for a moment, but then figured why not. After all…his master had asked. "Well, he said that he was not going to kiss your ass, no matter what you do to him…or something like that. Oh…and that you were a hypocritical dick."

The effect was immediate. You couldn't have gob smacked the stunned young man any harder even if you tried. Sasuke could feel the heat rise from the tips of his toes to the strands of his hair, and if it were possible for the water to start bubbling around him with the intense heat he felt, it would have taken place easily.

The washcloth was off his eyes, which now seemed to blaze a dark shade of red (at least to Haku it looked that way), but damn…his master did look pissed enough to kill something. Maybe he shouldn't have added the 'hypocritical dick' part.

"He said that, did he?" came the deceptively calm question.

_I'm in trouble…with both men,_ Haku thought miserably. He lowered his gaze again and nodded. "Yes…my Lord."

"I see." It took another minute for Sasuke to realize his fists were still tightly clenched, and he forced himself to relax them. In fact, he had to take another long minute to calm down; realizing he had been this close to storming out of here and writing out an order to cancel Uzumaki Naruto's 'freedom'. The gall of that fool! He knew it was a mistake releasing him! Come to think of it -

"Haku?"

"My Lord?"

"Fetch me Officer Sarutobi, will you? I need to see him in my private officer immediately."

Haku stiffened in concern. He lifted his gaze slowly; aware that his master was now in 'that mood' again. "Sasuke-sama?" he called out quietly.

"What is it?"

"…are you going to punish, Naruto-kun? I mean…it was my fault for goading him into saying that, so if anyone needs to be punished, it's me. Please! I beg you!" He bowed his head down to the stone floor again. "Please have mercy on him. He's already serving his punishment every day knowing his death is at hand, my Lord…"

_Faster than he knows it,_ Sasuke thought coldly. He was already stepping out of the onsen and would have walked right over his kneeling servant, when he felt the warm hands clasp around an ankle.

_What in the world…?_

"Release me this instant, Haku."

"Please do not make the same mistake you did with Zabuza-san," the younger man cried out with a harsh sob; a sound that seared through Sasuke's heart at the memory of his error. "Punish me in his stead, Sasuke-sama. Please…"

With a heavy sigh, Sasuke finally replied wearily. "Can you at least release me and fetch Asuma? I will consider your request. Will that suffice?"

"…yes…" came the low, miserable response.

"Until then, you are to stay away from the dining hall and the sinners' quarters, Haku," Sasuke threw over his shoulder. "God knows what other tales you've been feeding them about me."

Haku winced as he rose to his feet and made his 'escape' to find Officer Asuma. He figured it wouldn't be a good thing to mention that he had indeed spewed a whole lot more than he should have. If Sasuke knew that Naruto-kun was aware of his nightmares and struggles…Haku was definitely sure he wouldn't live to see another day.

By the time Asuma came sauntering into his private office, Sasuke - now clad in a silk black kimono and sitting behind his low table with several scrolls opened before him – was still steaming about being called a hypocritical dick. And what was that about not kissing his ass? Although he did find himself get a little flustered at the mental picture that had conjured up for a brief second.

No…Uzumaki Naruto would not kiss his ass, but he would be licking Sasuke's boots if by some miracle he ended up being the last one standing at Gudan. Somehow the knowledge that such a scenario was even possible sent a reluctant thrill down his spine. It would be a chance to prove not just his skills to Orochimaru, Danzo and the rest of their blood-thirsty politician friends, but to show Uzumaki Naruto, once and for all that his existence meant nothing more to him than that of a cockroach.

_I'll show you just how much of a dick I can be._

"Either you just sentenced someone else to Gudan, or you're really happy to see me," came the dry comment that had Sasuke looking up from the scroll he hadn't really been focused on anyway. Asuma was dressed just like him; now out of his uniform but wearing extra layers of warm clothing beneath the dark blue yukata. He watched the big man sit across him and puff out a cloud of smoke from the pipe he had stuck in his mouth.

"Pipes now?" Sasuke asked wanly as he waved the smoke away from his face and coughed a little. The smell was sickly sweet.

"It's the newest thing, my man." Unrepentant, he blew another trail of smoke toward his companion, only to start, in slight alarm, as something was slammed hard on the table between them. On closer inspection, it was the charm he had given Sasuke just before his travels with Orochimaru, and from the stern expression on Sasuke's face, Asuma knew this was no time to kid around.

"I take it you finally know what it's all about," he stated quietly.

"Not quite," Sasuke replied. "I need to know -"

"Not here," Asuma said with a light shake of his head. He reached for a piece of paper and withdrew a pen from within his robe.

Sasuke watched in bemusement as Asuma scribbled something before shoving it his way when done.

/Let's talk at my place/ The note said. /I'll leave first. Meet up with me in about half-an-hour after I'm gone./

Sasuke opened his mouth to ask 'why?' but must have seen something in Asuma's dark eyes to simply give a nod of understanding. He could feel his heart rate quicken for a whole other reason now; temporarily forgetting about his earlier anger at being insulted as he thought about getting closer to the truth about Ino. In the meantime, they both decided to talk about other matters; namely the moving of Gudan to the last week of the upcoming month.

"No kidding," Asuma replied wryly. "Shit…why?"

"Danzo and Orochimaru figured it was a way to convince the politicians that we take Gudan seriously," Sasuke replied quietly; failing to mention Orochimaru's trivial suggestion that it was just to test his fighting skills.

"A fight to the death, huh? That's gonna be brutal." Asuma sighed and shook his head. He glanced at the clock and then gave a curt nod. "All right, young master. Gotta get going. Got some paperwork to finish up."

"All right. You have a good night," Sasuke replied quietly as he too glanced at the clock. He nodded at the quick wink given to him by the older man before he excused himself. With the opening of the door, the chill set in; reminding Sasuke of how different the weather was here compared to Kyoto. Some of the snow had melted away with the warmer temperatures earlier in the day, but it was still cold enough to remind him of how lovely Byaku-Shinkyou looked in the throes of winter. God, he loved it up here in the North.

Though he did his best to pretend as if he wasn't time conscious, Sasuke tried to finish up the pile of paperwork he had to complete. There was a new batch of prisoners coming in tomorrow night; the last they would be receiving before the end of the year. With this group, the total tally of sinners brought to Byaku-Shinkyou in the past year was almost five hundred; a new record. About a third of them got dealt with during the Gudan held in the summer, the other half was released due to their small crimes, while others (the intermediaries) would serve out their sentences while working on the grounds. A part of him still believed that it was a strain on their resources; having to take care of these sinners, as well as maintaining Orochimaru's tendencies to keep building more and more facilities on the grounds. By the end of the next year, he was already planning to create a whole new 'education center' to broaden the minds of the many young men who wanted to become elite officers.

Whatever.

Forty-five minutes later he was finally finished with his tasks, and bundling himself as warmly as he could, he left his house in the cloak of winter's pitch darkness. He covered his head with the hood of his jacket; not wanting to be pestered by any officer still up and about. He rarely came to this side of the compounds these days, considering they used to be homes to normal families when he was a child. The narrow streets had once been filled with men, women, and children going about their daily lives, but now…except for one or two officers sitting outside and engaged in quiet conversation; it had become a shadow of its former self. There was simply no 'joy' felt anyway and it was depressing to tell the truth. All the same, he was incredibly tired and wanted nothing more than to go to sleep. However, he _had_ to learn the truth from Asuma, and even if it meant staying up until the wee hours of the morning, then so be it.

It wasn't hard to find Asuma's home. He now occupied the top floor of what had once been a bakery shop. The first floor had been turned into living quarters for another officer who, luckily, was on assignment; sparing Sasuke the chore of forced conversation. With a single knock on the door, Sasuke ushered himself into the cozy yet Spartan apartment, where the older man was waiting in his living room with a large bottle of sake and two cups on the low table.

"To celebrate your initiation into the Big Boys Club," he said with a playful wink. "I saw Kimimaro on the way here and he told me the good news. Heh, I knew there was something a little different about you. Congratulations!"

Sasuke, who had been in the process of taking off his shoes and the scarf wrapped around his neck, felt his cheeks burning with heat; and it wasn't from the electric heater in Asuma's room either.

"Shut up," he mumbled beneath his breath. "Can't believe that bastard would go announcing it to everyone." Wasn't anything sacred anymore?

"Hey, at least saves me the trouble of having to find you a good girlfriend. I was beginning to worry there that you might be…you know…" He titled his head in a motion that Sasuke understood full well.

"I am not like that," he replied tightly, though that sudden image of a certain blond (definitely not female) bowing at his feet; had him feeling a little hot under the collar. What the hell was wrong with him? Was he turning into that damn pervert with such sadistic thoughts? At least he could be grateful Kimimaro had not revealed the other shameful event that had transpired during the trip.

"Anyway…" He sat across from Asuma and shook his head at the alcoholic beverage handed to him. He didn't drink, remember? "First, why aren't we talking in my house?"

"Bugged," came the simple answer as Asuma helped himself to a full cup. He downed it in one gulp and let out a belch of satisfaction before meeting the bemused dark eyes before him. "Yep. You heard me. We think Orochimaru's been listening in to most of your conversation all this time, or he might be planning to."

Sasuke clutched fistfuls of his kimono; his gaze hard and wide as he tried to let this new information sink in. It would make sense then…of why he would sometimes meet Orochimaru and the older man would already know exactly what was taking place before he opened his mouth. How…how _stupid_ had he been all this time? It was also what Danzo must have suspected, hence the quick search at the dinner party. How long and how many times had he been bugged without his knowledge?

"No need to get too upset," Asuma reassured him with a small smile. "At least you haven't really done anything to warrant his suspicions so far."

"…he could have bugged my room in Kyoto," Sasuke said through lips that felt frozen. "He must have probably heard everything Ino said and..and…"

"I'm guessing this Ino is the girl you slept with?" At Sasuke's brief nod, Asuma grunted lightly. "Hmm. Think he would go that far on such short notice though?"

"He bugged my freakin' evening suit! The one Kimimaro bought for me, so both of them are on it!" Sasuke snarled. He pounded a fist of frustration on the mat. "All this time...I don't fucking believe it."

"It sucks, I know, but for now…just keep acting as if you don't know anything about it. I'll do a check on Ino to see where she is. Although if you're right and Orochimaru does know about her involvement with Akatsuki…" He bit his lip and lowered his gaze; his expression telling Sasuke all he needed to know about the possibilities of the girl surviving whatever was in store for her.

He groaned and covered his face; unable to accept just how fast everything seemed to be going downhill. Why did his life have to be such a complicated mess?

"Who…what is Akatsuki?" he finally asked hoarsely. "What do they want with me? Why didn't you tell me you were a part of them? What's the big secret?"

"I'm sorry, Sasuke, but it was something I hadn't really planned on revealing until the time was right. Perhaps it's best that you meet with someone who can tell you more about it than I can," Asuma said softly. "I can set up a meeting for the two of you because I'm sure you'll have lots of questions that I can't answer."

When Sasuke said nothing; though he still had the haunted expression on his visage; Asuma cleared his throat and began speaking quietly.

"Akatsuki is an underground organization with only one goal in mind…to help restore moral order and return Byaku-Shinkyou to what it once was. You could call them vigilantes; young men and women who are determined to stop the evils of those who wish to destroy the country."

Sasuke looked up sharply; his gaze narrowing with wariness and caution. "What the hell are you talking about?"

Asuma sighed and took a long drag from his pipe before speaking again. "After the uprising, as you already know, many of the Uchiha clan were eliminated or banished from Byaku-Shinkyou. Those able-bodied men who were not captured and forced to become officers for Orochimaru, dispersed all over the country and remained hidden in the shadows for fear of persecution. What you didn't know is that whoever was in charge of the uprising was _still_ going after any member of the clan willing to put up a fight. In other words, the goal was and is to completely wipe away your clan from the history books, Sasuke."

_Wipe…away…my…clan…?_

"That's…that's impossible," he blurted out before he could control himself; though an inexplicable chill was setting within his bones. "I'm still here, aren't I? There are at least fifteen of us left here…"

"Yeah, but for how long?" Asuma interrupted dryly. He was adjusting his pipe and adding some more tobacco into it. "I don't really know what Orochimaru's motives are when it comes to you, but I get the feeling that when he no longer needs you…you'll be next. Hate to be blunt, but that's the honest truth."

Sasuke was already shaking his head; not wanting to believe what he was hearing. It couldn't be true. This…all this didn't make any sense!

"So…so who was responsible for the uprising?" he asked in a thick whisper, but even as he asked, he felt he already knew the answer.

"Some folks say it's Shimura Danzo…others believe it was Orochimaru," Asuma replied with a shrug; though his watchful gaze was pinned on the pale young man before him. Sasuke looked like he was about to pass out. "Again, we do not know for sure, but…that's the rumor floating around. Orochimaru, Danzo, and your father were all in the same team, you could say…and I don't know all the particulars, but we believe there was a power struggle of sorts…"

"You're trying to tell me," came the low growl that interrupted his words. "You're trying to tell me that Orochimaru orchestrated the death of my family just so he could -"

"Don't take my word for it. This is purely me speculating at this point. As I said, I think it's best you speak to someone who knows more about this…and trust me," he added quickly as he watched the younger man's eyes darken into a shade that was almost blood red. Damn. Now he had seen the next level of Sasuke's anger, and it was not all that pretty.

"Now, before you go do something stupid," Asuma continued as he leaned forward in earnest. "You've got to pretend as if nothing is wrong, do you understand me? You've never liked Orochimaru from the beginning, right? At least something about him started to turn you off over the years, right?"

"Yes…his perverseness," Sasuke grated out coldly. "His penchant for not telling me anything. That son-of-a -"

"I know you're pissed, and trust me, those in Akatsuki are pissed for you, but we've got your back, Sasuke and we've been doing our best to protect you as best we can. As far as we know, Danzo wants you dead. He sees you as a threat should you one day decide to take over this place, and since he's got control of the Bakufu Syndicate or rather, they have him in his pocket, who the fuck knows, bottom line, if they get a chance, they'll take you out one way or another. Oddly enough, Orochimaru's been the one protecting you all this time by keeping you here. It's pretty damn complicated."

"Oh, I am soooo grateful for that," came the sarcastic response. "Just what am I? Some fucking ping pong ball to be bounced around by anyone for their own use?"

"Shssh! Keep your voice down. I realize it's not exactly the thing you want to hear, but you damn Uchiha folks were quite the powerhouse back in the day. Between them and the Senju…makes me wonder who the real monsters were," he added beneath his breath. However, with a smile, he held up a cup filled with sake and gave a knowing wink. "Ready for this now? Looks like you need it."

_Fuck it,_ were the two words that resonated loudly in the frazzle young man's mind as he accepted the small cup and downed the sake in without taking a breath. Any other day, he might have gone into a mini rant on why he couldn't drink, but in his current state…rules be damned. He finished with his throat burning, his eyes stinging, and his temper a little less flammable.

"They both want me dead," he finally said quietly as depression seemed to set in like a heavy hand descending on his shoulder. "That's why they changed the way Gudan was to be performed. They figured the last sinner standing was going to be the most difficult and toughest fighter and there was no way I could survive the battle." He felt the bubble of hysteria slowly rising to the surface, and when it did break through, Asuma could only watch sadly as the loud bitter laughter was mixed with tears that had nothing to do with the alcohol.

_Poor kid. That son-of-a-bitch really has warped and fucked you over, hasn't he? And what could I do? Simply cower in the shadows and do my best to keep that human side of you still intact. Did I do a good job? Huh, Itachi? Did I fail in the last task you gave to me? _

"Heh, at least if I die," Sasuke's drawled words cut into his thought when he finally sobered down and reached for another cup of sake. "I bequeath this fucking place to you. Cheers, Asuma! Rule Byaku-Shinkyou with a gentle fist or…whatever…"

"Thanks," Asuma replied wryly, but he found himself talking to thin air, for the young man – who clearly could not hold his liquor – had promptly slumped to the floor in a dead faint, though the tears still continued to fall ever so silently until the bigger man reached out to wipe them away gently.

"Hang in there, kid," he whispered softly. "I know it's painful, but your time will come. We promise you that."

* * *

><p><em>Naruto:<em>

Tomorrow was New Year's Eve. The beginning of the end, in his humble opinion. The New Year was only going to usher in the final days, weeks and months until his death; and though he would have wished to complete everything on his bucket list (in which his goal of finishing at least twenty bowls of Ichiraku's famous _yakisoba_ in one sitting was at #2), he figured he might as well do the best he can under his new and difficult circumstances.

Thankfully, no snow had fallen overnight, so there was nothing to be shoveled this morning. Even better, it was finally a day off for him…well only because some new sinners had been 'hired', so Naruto's hours were reduced a little to accommodate the newcomers. He didn't mind at all, except he discovered he really had nothing to do besides sitting in either his storage room and watching the folks at the laundry do their job or remaining cooped up in his 'closet' reading some of the 'literature' Shikamaru managed to smuggle in. Such fantastic readings usually included fascinating write-ups on the Hottest Girl of the Month, or Wannabe Idols who – in his opinion – could very well be AV candidates.

He wasn't complaining. Besides, it was the most action he was ever going to get in this dump, and considering that many of the other guys were more than excited for the festival, Naruto felt even more depressed at what it signified. They would finally get some 'alone time' with their girlfriends or wives; something even Shikamaru had all but drooled over as he anticipated his girl coming. As if that wasn't bad enough, there were even one or two townhouses set aside just for that; though the sleazy officers would make a quick buck by charging the desperate sinners some money for at least an hour of use.

Take for instance, one of the sinners who simply went by the name of Kurama. Kurama would brag – to anyone that cared to listen – that he had managed to pay up for at least _three_ hours of alone time with his TWO girlfriends; though neither girl would know the other was there. He had been a player through and through on the 'outside', and the irony of his so-called purification hadn't seemed to cure him of this particular disease.

Finally having enough of listening to the men brag about their future conquests and what they planned to do to their women, Naruto managed to slip out undetected in an effort to get some fresh air…and to think clearly.

The grounds were literally bustling with activity, as everyone seemed to be doing something in readiness for the festival. Though he had covered his head with the thin scarf (to hide himself as best he could), no one really stopped him or had the time to anyway. That being the case, he was able to walk past the invisible line between the sinners' quarters and the main grounds with no fear of being stopped or harassed.

"Wow…"

He whistled beneath his breath as he took in the numerous and beautiful _kadomatsu_ – three bamboo branches each representing heaven, humanity, and earth and wrapped within a straw mat and rope – that lined several entrances. As he came to a stop before a particularly impressive one – this had been adorned with tall blue and green flowers – Naruto swallowed the hard lump that came to his throat as memories of previous New Years he had celebrated came rushing back.

Since he had no family growing up, he had always missed out on the other fun parts of the holiday, like receiving postcards or getting money in fancy envelopes. He at least did receive a beautiful handmade charm from Sakura while they dated. All the same, he had done his best to enjoy the holiday as best he could. He never missed watching _Kohaku Uta Gassen_ on T.V. for instance, and he would always make sure he purchased the best _mochi_ money could buy.

…_not next year…_

He sighed and kicked absently at a stone; watching it roll around until it fell into a gutter. He kicked another and continued to play his one-sided football, until he almost hit the carved stone statue of some god he could not recognize. He steadied himself against the ancient object and realized that he had somehow ended up in the dojo area…again.

However, unlike last time when the place had been filled with officers (or kids) practicing, the intimidating building stood empty and silent; as if waiting for something…or someone.

_Come…come to me…come within…come…Uzumaki Naruto…_

He blinked hard; realizing he was only imagining that an empty building could be speaking to him. It was ridiculous, but all the same, he found himself climbing up the stone steps; his heart beating hard, loud and fast within his chest as he licked his dry lips. He _shouldn't_ be here. He wasn't supposed to be here. Unpurified sinners were banned from entering such sacred places. Hell, he had even been told he would not have the opportunity to partake in the New Year festivities.

Banned. Banned. Banned.

Everywhere he went. He simply was not needed.

_Well fuck them all,_ he thought bitterly as he stepped out of his slippers and allowed his feet to touch the cool wooden floors now shiny with wear and age of the many fighters who have graced it over the years. If you stared hard enough, you could even make out the darker spots as possibly blood stains from strenuous matches. The interior was damn impressive though it was really nothing more than a wide open space for fighting/training, a high ceiling with slats resembling those of the temple, and a podium with three low desks and pillows. The wooden walls were adorned with spiritual scrolls and photographs of old masters; reminding the fighters/officers of exactly where they were.

_To be an elite officer...to be respected...looked upon with reverence...never to be._

He noticed a large stand in the furthest corner of the room where several wooden _shinai_ were stored. He knew he was pushing his luck by daring to do what his mind and body screamed for him to attempt, but hey…it wouldn't hurt to know what it felt like to swing that around, would it? He had never actually fought with a sword before except for his weak attempts at playing with Officer Dosu's katana when he was still a kid. He rubbed his nose and blushed in embarrassment; though he darted a quick glance around to make sure no one was here to watch him make a fool out of himself.

"Just for a little bit," he whispered to the empty room, and taking a deep breath, he chose a _shinai_ that was actually not as heavy as he had assumed it would be. He tested its weight within his grip as he wrapped his hands around the handle…seemed like a good fit…and then…swung in a clumsy half-circle that nearly sent him tumbling to the floor.

"Fuck," he breathed in surprise. "This isn't as easy as it looks, is it?"

He tried again; trying to mimic the way he had seen some of his favorite action heroes fight with swords in the movies. Yet with each swing, he felt even more ridiculous. He didn't know if it was the outfit he was wearing which hindered his movement, or that the _shinai_ didn't feel that…well…_right_ in his hands…

_That's because you were meant for the gun, Naruto, _Kojima's voice seemed to whisper into his ear. Naruto shuddered and tried to block it out. _These hands…were meant to ki -_

"HEY!"

_Oh shit!_

He spun around at the thunderous bellow from the officer; looking for all the world like a deer caught in headlights. He tried to run, but his feet remained frozen. His palms seemed glued to the handle of the _shinai_ with his sweat, and he struggled to come up with some possible excuse that would fly with the irate man stomping toward him.

"What the hell do you think you're doing here?" the officer asked, and just as Naruto figured he could get away with hitting the guy with the weapon and bolting from the scene, another officer appeared to see what the commotion was about.

_Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! This was so not what I had planned,_ Naruto wailed inside. _So sorry, man, but I've gotta run!_

He swung blindly; listening to the wail of disbelief and pain from the officer he had struck hard on the shoulder. He dropped the _shinai_ in panic and would have run out safely, if he suddenly didn't slip on the droplets of sweat (which had accumulated while 'practicing') to fall flat on his face with a painful thud.

_Goddamnit!_

"Got the bastard!" one of the officers cried as Naruto felt his arms tugged behind him before being bound by what he assumed to be rope of some sort. He struggled fruitlessly, but the two men (including the one he had struck) were pinning him down to the polished floor; where the eye-watering stench of wood polish and years of sweaty feet had him gritting his teeth. He braced himself for a blow or two, knowing he was probably going to be sent back to the dungeon for his stupid decision, when the low, deep voice had the three of them freezing immediately.

"What is going on here?"

The officers let up a little, but still didn't release him, and Naruto felt as if his arms were going to be ripped off their sockets if they kept tugging them so hard. He did manage to crane his neck a little to see who the newcomer was, but he figured he should have known before the officers opened their mouth.

"Good morning, Sasuke-sama!" they greeted with salutes. "We found this sinner daring to practice within the sacred dojo."

"Ouch!" Naruto complained when he was cuffed suddenly. "There was no need for -"

"Silence in the presence of the first captain!" came the sharp reprimand. "You will know your place -"

"Release him."

_Huh?_

Even the officers were just as stunned at this announcement. The one who was struck looked the most indignant. "My Lord, he…he attacked me! He cannot -!"

"I said release him, Officer Kenzo," came the cold command laced with impatience. "I will not repeat myself."

With great reluctance, the officers slackened their death grip and stepped away; allowing the blond young man to stagger to his feet, though he had to flex his arms a little to get the circulation back into them. As he did this, he stole a surreptitious glance at his 'savior', who seemed to be heading toward the storage bin filled with _shinai_.

_What the hell is he doing?_

With bemusement, he watched Sasuke - who looked like he had just had a pretty shitty morning already (didn't he look like that all the time?) - select a _shinai_ for himself before turning back to face Naruto.

_Yikes. _

Sasuke really did look like hell. There were dark circles around his eyes- as if he hadn't slept very well last night – and the downturn of his lips signified a man who was not exactly making any attempt to become his buddy anytime soon.

Which was fine with Naruto anyway. Recalling how Sasuke had treated him had his hackles rising as well. So what if his entire family was murdered and he was nothing more than fodder for that snake dude? A dick was still a dick. Nothing could change that.

"Pick up your sword," Sasuke commanded with a nod toward the _shinai_ Naruto had dropped earlier.

Naruto raised a brow. "…why?"

"You want to fight, don't you?" Sasuke sneered coldly. "So? Pick up your goddamn sword and show me why you dared to sully this sacred place with your sinful soul."

Naruto gritted his teeth at the blatant insult. It must be a talent; the way this guy could open his mouth and spew the most condescending language in the history of mankind. Hell, even if Sasuke did say a simple 'hello', Naruto was sure it would sound as if Sasuke was greeting a pile of feces. He could hear the officers snickering behind him, and that only fueled his aggravation. With a low growl, he bent to pick up the weapon, when the sudden stomp of Sasuke's foot on his hand had him fighting an inner wince of pain.

_Not playing fair, are you, you piece of shit!_

He looked up and into the blank dark eyes that scrutinized him with an intensity that he would have found creepy if it wasn't for his furious state of mind. He had no idea what Sasuke was thinking, but he'd be damned before he'd let this bastard get to him like this.

"Why do you exist?" came the sudden low question that – for a brief second- threw Naruto off with its randomness.

_Why do I exist? Why do **I **exist? I'll tell you why I live each and every day, you stuck up prick!_

"To make your life a living hell," he growled and with a speed that Sasuke hadn't seen coming, he simultaneously pushed off the captain's foot (nearly sending him toppling to the floor) and picked up his _shinai_ before rising unsteadily to his feet.

"Come on then," he invited with a bravado he did not really feel inside. He didn't know how to fight with a real sword – let alone this damn wooden replacement - but by God, he was going to do his best to wipe the smug look off that face.

However, as he watched Sasuke take a step back, close his eyes, take a deep breath, and then lift his lashes slowly before falling into a stance that just about made him look downright formidable…

…Naruto somehow knew he was in for a _world_ of hurt.


	12. 12: Prelude

******Notes:** Thank you so very much again for your comments on the last chapter! *bows gratefully* You guys are wonderful! Hopefully this chapter makes up for the semi-long delay. Yours truly has had a very crazy ass week, that's for sure. *sigh* Anyhoo...enjoy! And as always, your feedback is my Gatorade. :)

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 12: <strong>

**pRelude**

_As I view the moon,  
>Many things come into my mind,<br>And my thoughts are sad;  
>Yet it's not for me alone,<br>That the autumn time has come._

_Oe no Chisato_

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke:<em>

Morning was heralded with a blinding headache and a sour taste in my mouth; the unfortunate aftermath of my decision to indulge in alcohol for the first time in my life out of self-pity. Big mistake. I doubted I was going to be hitting the bottle anytime soon after this and it made me wonder how anyone could relish in the taste of something that potent and survive to see the next day. Alcohol truly was the bane of -

_Shit._ This was no time to lie and ruminate on the evils of sake. I needed to relieve myself…_badly._

Forcing my lashes open (they felt as if someone had placed lead weights on them), I threw off the blanket that covered me and staggered to my feet; my knees jelly-like and hardly able to support me. Asuma must have made the makeshift futon for me to sleep in, since I was still in the living room area, but with the heavy silence in the apartment, I had a feeling I was alone.

Good. The last thing I needed to see was his face this morning. I was sure he would probably laugh and call me 'weak' for not being able to hold my liquor. The sadistic bastard.

With a loud groan, I stumbled into the bathroom…fumbled clumsily with my kimono… (almost stumbled to the floor), but finally managed to lower my damn underwear to get the job done. For the record, it must have been the longest time I've spent standing up and letting go of such bodily fluids. I would be impressed at this feat, if I wasn't still feeling slightly disoriented and out of sorts.

With my bladder finally emptied (and thankful it had stopped or I was sure I would drain every single liquid in my body, risking dehydration), I shuffled to the sink to wash my hands and mouth. A quick glance at the small mirror before me, earned a grimace as I finally took note of my reflection. To be perfectly blunt, I looked like hell. I had always frowned upon the few drunks I had arrested in the past, but look at me now...wouldn't they be the ones mocking my appearance? My eyes were slightly bloodshot and faint dark rings encircled them like angry smears. There were shameful dry streaks of what must have been tears etched on my cheeks. I scrubbed at them angrily, recalling – with some effort – the surreal conversation I had with Asuma last night.

_To wipe out my clan…_

Some things were slowly falling into place, and yet Asuma's story had only left me longing for more. Why were _we_ such a threat? What harm could we possibly do while we were so outnumbered by our 'enemies'? Who was the leader behind this Akatsuki, and why were they so eager to assist me in restoring Byaku-Shinkyou back to its glory days? How could they be trusted if they couldn't tell me their objective from the beginning? I mean what stopped this 'leader' from trying to take over when Orochimaru was eventually thrown out of power?

_If that day ever comes._

I snorted in derision. If it was that easy to eliminate him, I'm sure that would have been done by now. I need not remind you of how improbable that task is, for the man has been able to avoid attempts made on his life before…and quite easily too. Perhaps this Akatsuki have tried in the past and failed. Perhaps like me, they were simply biding their time and building up their 'army' to start another uprising. I gave an involuntary shudder at the possibility.

Either way, I had a lot to think about now…if my brain would cooperate with me. I still felt as if my head was stuffed with cotton balls, and I had to sit for almost ten minutes before I felt I could walk without falling flat on my face. I did finally notice the note Asuma had hastily scribbled before leaving. He had stuck it on the fridge, with a magnet in the shape of very voluptuous breasts (typical), perhaps assuming I'd want something to eat. He was right. I was starving, but his damn fridge hardly had anything edible in it (a loaf of bread that was a week past its expiration date, five bottles of beer, a large bottle of water, and two eggs in a cardboard crate of twelve). Shutting the fridge with a muttered curse, I blinked hard to make out the words he had written:

_Gone to town to find out about 'her'._

_Help yourself to breakfast._

_Talk to you later._

_Her?_ Ah, I had almost forgotten about that; though with his ominous words last night, any hope for Ino still being alive was diminishing with every passing second. I squeezed my eyes shut and crushed the note within a palm; perhaps hoping my whispered prayer for some good news would come true. Still it only brought to light the other situations that made this whole thing seem like something out of a really bad movie.

_Bugged. All this time, my privacy was being invaded by him listening in to my conversations. How the hell am I supposed to act as if nothing's wrong when I'm going to keep wondering if everything I'm doing is being observed or listened to? _

With a frustrated punch of the wall, I forced myself to calm down before leaving the apartment. Unfortunately, it was no use. Every step toward my private quarters became more depressing. All I could think about was Orochimaru's presence even if he wasn't there physically. How the fuck was I supposed to function now? I would have to do a thorough sweep of my home…from top to bottom (with Haku's help probably), just to make sure there was nothing anywhere. It would take time, but I was determined to get rid of them; no matter how long it took. Of course if he realized I had taken away all his tracking devices, he might begin to get suspicious and then try some other sneaky tactic to spy on me.

All the same, I was getting too ahead of myself. I needed to clear my head a little more – to try to think up some way to move on from here on out. I needed some peace and quiet in a sanctuary where all troubled thoughts could be appeased. Hence my decision to head toward the temple. I would share my fears and concerns with the priests…

(is that a wise idea? They are Orochimaru's cronies as well, remember? What stops them from telling him all your secrets? You might want to shut your mouth if you know what's good for you.)

…right. Talking to the priests was definitely out of the question. So what could I do next -?

"Ow! Fuck! The bastard hit me! Get him!"

_What the hell…?_

No one was supposed to be in the dojo at this hour. With everyone preparing for the _shogatsu_ festivities tonight and tomorrow, the dojo was usually empty. However, the loud commotion in there had me gritting my teeth at the mindless acts of possibly some officers deciding to play around this early in the day. I was already in a sour mood, with zero to no tolerance for anyone's bullshit, and as I climbed the steps – mentally preparing my speech for them – what reality presented almost had me doing a double take.

In fact, I think it's safe to say my brain found it rather hard to compute what it was seeing.

_Uzu…Uzumaki Naruto? _

I squeezed my eyes shut for a second; resisted the urge to rub it just to be doubly sure the alcohol wasn't responsible for this insane hallucination, but opening them again…_he_ was _still_ there, now being pinned to the floor by the irate officers. It looked like they were just about to hit him into submission, when a quick glance around the dojo had me putting two and two together.

The sinner had _dared_ to come into this sacred place to practice. Incredible. You really had to reluctantly admire his guts despite the consequences that awaited him. Lucky for him (and me), I was going to have to remind him of his place around here. If he was a wielder of the sword, then it would be a good test of my skills in preparation for Gudan. It's been a while since I've gone all out on someone who wasn't just a sparring partner.

And yet, it was strange – as I watched him accept my challenge; strange that a part of me was actually thrilled at the prospect of fighting him one-on-one. There is no doubt a certain rush of adrenaline comes over you when in combat. Everything seems heightened and clearer; your senses alert (a little dulled today though) and every nerve ending in your body is wired taut with preparedness to fight. Your heart races, quickens, beats just a little faster and harder even before it begins. Your flesh breaks out in tingling goose bumps and that urge to hit…to strike...to cause pain to another deliberately fills you with a charge unlike any other. Hell, now that I've had my first consummation with a woman, I could almost compare it to the moment when I felt my orga –

_Just what the hell was I thinking about in a time like this?_

Cursing beneath my breath, I forced myself to concentrate and to take a really good look at my opponent. Compared to the last time I saw him, the sinner looked much healthier; close to how he was when I first saw him in the bus. Most of the bruises I had noticed last time were gone, and he didn't seem to be limping either. What was wrong with this picture? No…what was wrong with _him_? I just could not understand it. This was a man supposed to be broken in spirit. Most sinners set for the final rite of purification were usually resigned to their fates; mindless zombies who went about day to day simply counting down to their final breaths.

_Not this one._

Not this one who had dared to come to this side of the grounds where he was not allowed (and goodness knows that excuse of 'being lost' wouldn't wash this time around). Not this one who had dared to walk into a place where great warriors had battled over the years and had even gone as far as picking up a weapon to practice as if he belonged. Not this one who dared to look at me with those eyes that blazed with a feverish passion that was likely to scorch one's soul. It led me to finally ask the question; to ask why he seemed intent on living when there was absolutely no hope left for him.

_Why do you exist?_

His answer was not what I had expected; neither was his next move which almost had me stumbling to the floor; an embarrassing situation before my subordinates who were watching us with acute interest. To humiliate me before them was unacceptable, and yet one had to admire his ability to move that fast to take me completely off guard. I would have to be careful with this one.

"Come on then," he taunted with a sneer.

_Ignore him. Concentrate. Center yourself, Uchiha Sasuke. He's fast, so you must strike where he least expects…_

As I fell into my stance – shifting my legs as far apart as they could go considering I was still in a kimono and not my usual hakama pants for training, while balancing my weight on my slightly bent right knee and holding out my _shinai_ – I was stumped (and honestly confused) to see him…well…_not_ in a stance. He was simply standing with the _shinai_ above his shoulder like a common thug in a street fight. He was so open I could have hit him anywhere without much resistance. What the hell was wrong with him?

"What the hell are you doing?" I grated impatiently. "Fall into your stance."

Is he mocking me? Is he suggesting he can defeat me with no respect for the tradi –

"I don't know what stance you're talking about," he replied with a smirk and a thumbing of his nose in obvious derision. "I call this the Uzumaki Naruto stance, so deal with it."

The…the _what_? That's it. This sinner had insulted me for the last time!

I moved; feinting that I was going to hit him straight on as I raised my _shinai_, only to twist a little to strike at his right ribs with enough force to send him staggering backwards in surprise. His low cry of pain was music to my ears, but I was not done giving him an introductory lesson. He tried to protect himself by holding out the _shinai_ – which did succeed as my next attack was blocked, but only for an instant. I crouched a little and pushed off his weapon; seeking his left side, but was blindsided with his almost graceful dodge to the right. I hissed in a breath as he yelled and swung – his intention to hit my shoulder, but I was fast enough to prevent it from happening as I thrust out my weapon to block the attack. (Un)Fortunately for him, the tip of my _shinai_ ended up grazing his left temple; leaving an ugly red welt behind.

However, did that stop the bastard? No way. He swung again and though I raised my _shinai_ to block the wild attack (this was clearly a sign this man had no idea about _kenjutsu_); I was shocked to find myself pushed back with the force of his blow. My feet slipped a little and I would have fallen to the floor if not for my quick reflexes kicking in to hold me steady. We were literally in a stalemate now as we strained toward each other with our _shinai_; wondering who would give in first. All things considered this was the first time I was this close to him; so close that I could feel his warm breath against my face; could see the whites of his teeth as he snarled and pushed at me. His features were flushed with exertion and sweat; a sign that he was not exactly in the best physical shape despite his slender build. Another thing I couldn't help noticing was that his scars looked more prominent when he was angry; as if they had a life of their own and etching deeper into his flesh. However, all this paled in comparison to his most compelling feature. His eyes. Those startling blue orbs were the most telling of all, and in them, I could see _everything_…

Anger. Frustration. Pain. Helplessness. Resignation.

"Why don't you give up?" I growled beneath my breath; ignoring the cheers from the officers who wanted me to finish him. "You have no hope left, Sinner. So bow your head in defeat, and I will spare you the agony of finishing the rest of your days back in the dungeon."

Perhaps I naively expected him to be grateful for my suggestion; that he would consider me merciful and drop his weapon, but instead of fulfilling my foolish ideas, he curled his lips into what could be considered a mocking smile and growled right back.

"Fuck. You."

And though he didn't say this out loud, I could literally hear him add, "Didn't I say I wasn't going to kiss your ass?" A reminder of what Haku had revealed about his true thoughts when it came to me. I burned with embarrassment at being dismissed so easily.

"So be it, Sinner -"

"It's Uzumaki Naruto, asshole," he corrected me angrily. "At least get it right!"

"Like hell I'll call you by that name!" Goddamn it! He was _really_ pushing me to my goddamn limit, and all I could think about was causing him so much pain, I simply couldn't think straight. This bastard was driving me insane!

With all my strength, I finally pushed him off and swung as hard as I could towards the left side of his head; something to take him out completely. I failed to notice the newcomers to the dojo, and perhaps I would have really finished him off there and then when something…no an arm rather…seemed to appear from nowhere to intercept my blow.

I winced as the _shinai_ shattered into pieces against the muscled arm, and turning quickly to see who the person was, I was stunned to see it was Asuma; smiling but grimacing at the same time as he brushed away some of the splinters from his uniform. Naruto – who had fallen to the floor – seemed just as surprised to see the bigger man in the dojo. Neither of us had heard him come in.

"I thought this was supposed to be a friendly spar," Asuma said with a wink in my direction. "Looked like you were about to kill him, Sasuke."

"I was," I answered bluntly. "Spares me the extra work of doing it on the day of Gudan."

"Huh…"

"And what would be the fun in that?" came the familiar low drawl of amusement that had all of us turning toward the main doorway to the dojo. As if my morning couldn't be any more full of surprises. It was Orochimaru and his shadow – Kimimaro – making their way to the middle of the dojo. I could only assume he was doing one of his rare morning strolls around the grounds to see the progress of the festival preparations, otherwise, I really couldn't understand why he was here in the first place.

While the other officers bowed in respect, I couldn't get myself to do it, and the stupid blond sinner hadn't even made any attempt to do the same. He was still sitting on the floor with a raised brow at the newcomers as if unable to believe he could warrant such an important visit. I was about to open my mouth to order him to bow, but found the words stuck somewhere in my throat as Orochimaru trained his gaze on Naruto with an intensity that made me uneasy. It was an expression I had seen so many times now in the past. Orochimaru had found something 'new' he liked or approved of. I gritted my teeth in simmering irritation.

"And who is this?" he finally asked with a slow lick of his lips. "I don't believe I've seen you around here before."

"His name is Uzumaki Naruto, my Lord," Asuma replied after a pregnant minute of silence where no one seemed ready to give an answer. "He's a sinner set for Gudan."

"Oh?" Orochimaru's brows shot up in surprise, and I was sure he was going to explode in anger at the audacity of Naruto's actions, but instead…he only threw back his head and laughed out loud in pure amusement. "Well, well, this is the first time I've heard or seen a sinner like you dare to walk into the dojo…or not be within the bowels of the earth in readiness for your final rite of purification. You may rise to your feet, Uzumaki Naruto."

Might be my imagination, but I was sure Naruto had visibly shivered as Orochimaru reached out to touch his hair just as he was standing up. He was still clutching his _shinai_, and a part of me wondered (perhaps hoped) that the sinner would swing hard at the man still examining him thoughtfully.

"Where are you from?" Orochimaru queried.

"The South," came the cryptic answer. Did he have no intention of telling Orochimaru exactly where he came from?

"The South…obviously," Orochimaru mused. "And why are you here?"

"Here?" Naruto asked with a raised brow. "Do you mean here in the dojo or here in this dump overall?"

Oh my God! I was aghast at his behavior, but Asuma seemed to be enjoying himself immensely. He smiled as he crossed his arms across his chest and watched the interaction between the other two men. Kimimaro had an expression I was sure I had on my face as well. No one…at least no sinner had ever spoken to Orochimaru with such flippancy. It was as if Naruto simply had no fear, and why this infuriated me, I had no idea.

"This dump?" Orochimaru smirked. "You consider Byaku-Shinkyou a dump?"

Naruto shrugged and then turned his head a little to glare at me. "Not exactly a five-star hotel, is it? Besides, I don't really appreciate being attacked by your people when I was doing nothing wrong."

"You were obviously brought here for a reason, Uzumaki Naruto, and for that reason you were deemed fit for the blessed rite of Gudan. You should consider yourself lucky."

Naruto gave him an 'are-you-shitting-me?' look that would have had me laughing, but I was still in my state of dull shock and disbelief to react.

"And you, Sasuke," came the sudden reprimand that had me looking up in surprise. Orochimaru was shaking his head and 'tsking' as if admonishing a child. "I thought you had more restraint than that. To think you'd be so quick to pick a fight with a sinner in such a manner. Quite unbecoming of a first captain, don't you think?"

I felt my entire being flush with heat at the humiliating dress-down I was receiving in front of the other officers, but more importantly before this…this…this sinner who did not deserve to take another fucking breath. I clenched my hands into tight fists by my side and refused to say anything lest I explode with all the accusations I wanted to hurl at him. I couldn't even look into his face, and the headache I had once thought gone was returning with a vengeance.

"Whatever the case may be, we will stop all matters here for today and try to enjoy the last day of the year, hmm? Besides, my dear fiery Uzumaki Naruto, there'll be plenty of time for you to show us your fighting skills. I so look forward to watching you in battle."

He reached out to caress the blond's cheek…or would have if Naruto didn't suddenly reach out to slap it away, while taking a step back with a look of panic in his eyes.

"Sor…sorry," Naruto sputtered as he must have noticed the dark expression that flittered across Orochimaru's countenance. "I just don't like people touching me…like that."

"I see," was the clipped reply as Orochimaru formed a fist with the hand he had once extended in a gesture of 'acceptance'. I almost expected him to hit Naruto with it, but he only spun on his heels; the long black robe he was wearing, sweeping the floor with every step he took. He came to a stop before the podium – seemed to think something over – before turning around to face us again.

"I might as well impart this to you, Uzumaki Naruto, since I assume that it was Sasuke who forgot to send you to your real place of incarceration." His tongue snaked out again; his eyes now aglow with dark amusement. "Your day of judgment is fast approaching as the date has been moved to within the next three weeks. So…enjoy your time on this physical earth as much as you can, my dear, for a better and more rewarding life awaits you after your final purification! I have a feeling I'll take great pleasure in watching the events unfold."

And with a grin that didn't quite reach his eyes, he left the dojo – with Kimimaro in tow - in a state of deafening silence broken only by the sound of a _shinai_ clattering loudly to the floor. It was Naruto, who was no doubt in shock at the news. I'm sure he hadn't expected to hear that his life would be over so soon, and though I felt I ought to gloat with victory at his pale visage and widened blue eyes, a small part of me felt…

_Pity? Sorry for him?_

How stupid.

_He deserves it,_ I told myself vehemently. It was his reward for doing something so foolish in the first place.

(as in seeking revenge for the woman he loved? Think about it, Sasuke. Aren't you planning on doing the same thing? If Ino's dead…aren't you going to want to teach the killer(s) a lesson? Or will you simply shrug and brush it aside? What's so different about his life and yours? What's so..?)

"Sasuke?"

Asuma's voice broke through my muddled thoughts, and I looked up to meet his unreadable visage. "The officers want to know what you plan to do with him."

Him being Naruto now slumped to his knees; the stunned expression still on his features. I had the feeling Naruto was mentally no longer in the room with us and though every fiber of my being screamed for him to be sent back to the dungeons, I knew Asuma would take issue with that and besides…

(he's suffered enough for one day)

"…back to his quarters," I finally replied with a light shrug. "We are finished here."

"All right, Blondie! Up on your feet! Let's go!" one of the officers growled as they both all but dragged an unresisting Naruto up and out of the dojo. A part of me hoped he would look back and possibly sneer or growl at me, but I got nothing. Orochimaru had managed to do something I had been unable to accomplish with only a few words. It made me resent the bastard even more.

"Hangover cured now?" Asuma asked dryly as he bent to pick up the _shinai_ Naruto had dropped. "Just had to pick a fight first thing in the morning, didn't you?"

"He started it," I grumbled childishly while stooping to my haunches to pick up the broken pieces of my _shinai_. I could easily leave it for the sinners to clean up, but Asuma and I needed to talk anyway. "How long were you here?"

"Long enough to see you almost do something you might have regretted. Never seen you get so hot under the collar over someone like that before."

"His very presence infuriates me."

"Why?"

Why? _Why?_ There were so many damn reasons where could I possibly begin? "It just does," I muttered angrily. I needed to change the subject."Him aside…any news about…you know?"

Asuma sighed heavily and put the _shinai_ back in place before walking back to stoop beside me. Even before opening his mouth, I knew what the answer would be, and yet I didn't want to accept the inevitable.

"It's not looking too good," he said quietly. "They don't know where they've taken her to, and it might be a few days before they can track down her whereabouts. They have promised to keep me posted, and when I hear any news I'll let you know."

Damn it. Playing the waiting game was going to be torture.

"When can I meet this leader?" I asked impatiently. "I need to see him as soon as possible, Asuma."

"Patience, young master," Asuma replied with a small smile. "Your best chance to meet with him will be during Gudan. Orochimaru will be too busy with his invited guests to take much notice of what happens after the festivities. Until then…do your best not to get in trouble. Got it?"

I opened my mouth to protest, but Asuma was already shaking his head and nodding towards a few more officers walking into the dojo. Our conversation, for now, was officially over. Besides, I needed to get away from here. I still felt like shit, and having these men wonder why I was dressed rather casually, instead of being in my uniform, was something I did not want to deal with.

The journey back to my private quarters was an uninterrupted one, and I was even more relieved that I did not have Haku's many questions to deal with. During this time of the year, he was usually around the grounds assisting with the set up of the decorations for the New Year celebrations, which was fine with me. Being alone gave me the chance to think again and to finally cleanse myself from being in contact with that sinner…

/It's Uzumaki Naruto, asshole! At least get it right!/

"You heathen," I hissed angrily as that voice resonated loudly in my head. _As if I'd ever get a chance to call you by that name…ever. Maybe just as I'm about to execute you... if it comes to that. Maybe then, I'll give you the pleasure of calling out your full name before sending you to the next life._

I sunk a little lower in the bathtub and tried to think of anything else but that fool. I wondered what the turn out would be for the festivities tomorrow. Last year, we had a good sized crowd, and though I would have rather spent my time reading, Orochimaru had insisted I mingle with the townsfolk and show that we were benevolent and caring (or whatever shit he had spewed about public relations). Still, this year, I planned to -

/Fuck. You./

_Damn_ _it!_

I closed my eyes, placed the washcloth over them, and tried to relax. Now literally willing myself to not filter that annoying voice into my mind again. I would think of my plans for the New Year ahead. It was already going to start off rather grueling, and I would have to practice twice as hard in the dojo in readiness for Gu -

/To make your life a living hell./

_Leave me the fuck alone!_

I blushed hard as I realized I had actually shouted that aloud. In my haste, the washcloth had slid off my face to fall into the soapy waters, and in the process of searching for it, I found myself burning up for a whole other reason now.

I was horrifyingly, uncontrollably, shamefully _aroused_.

_Why?_

Perhaps it was still because of the rush of the fight; for it wasn't uncommon for me to get an erection after a particularly good work out, but I had never really thought much of it in…well…in a sexual light. Was it because of my encounter with Ino (and Orochimaru)? Was I now more aware of how easy and sensitive I was to my body's every reaction to an intense emotion? What was wrong with me? Had they both weakened me to the point of wanting some form of release; no matter how I set about achieving it? Did I now really crave another human's touch to send me to the heights of pleasure? I could almost hear Orochimaru's voice taunting and mocking me; could almost see him gloating in victory at my current descent into indecency.

_It's okay to give in, my dear. It's okay to reveal this side of you every once in a while…_

I squeezed my eyes shut and clamped my thighs together; forcing myself to conjure up the most grotesque images possible. I did not want to think of being touched by anyone; not by Haku, not by Ino, definitely not by Orochimaru and not by…

/Come on then…/

**No**…definitely not _him._

/Come…/

**No! **Goddamn it! I bit my lower lip hard enough to draw blood as my treacherous mind continued to tease me mercilessly with that taunting voice. Though reality begged to remind me that he had said that phrase in a way to make me angry…at this very moment…in this steamy bathroom…and as my fingers slowly found their way to an organ that was all but throbbing hard with anticipation…the sinner's voice seemed to change.

/Come…Sasuke.../

"Fuck…" I gasped as I tugged gently and burned in shame. "Please…don't…make me do this…" I pleaded breathlessly to no one in particular.

And yet as the vivid memory of his warm breath against my face; of those lips parting to reveal teeth that a sick and twisted part of me longed to have buried within my flesh, and of those piercing blue eyes blazing with an emotion other than anger, I groaned in misery and obscured my feverish face against my raised arm balanced on the edge of the tub.

This was too…too damn _cruel_.

"Oh God…"

My toes curled with delight as I felt the pressure mounting…faster…harder…and in the process, cursed my wild imagination taking flight because I was no longer alone in the tub. I could almost feel his arms around me, his naked chest against my back, his own hard organ nudging my buttocks, but best of all, I could feel his fingers taking over mine, wrapping themselves around my swollen penis and perhaps his voice…taunting…teasing…smoky hot within my ear saying…

"Let me help you, Sasuke. You're too damn weak to finish it on your own."

_Fuck yes!_

I gave a choked sob with a release so intense, the world seemed to black out for a second. My entire body thrummed with an energy I had never experienced before, not even with Ino. I trembled in the aftermath of my satiation; willing my pounding heart to slow down. I was panting as if I had just run a goddamn marathon, and as I forced my lashes open slowly (hadn't even realized my eyes had been closed all this time), I struggled to get my breathing back to normal and to understand just what had transpired.

_What is happening to me?_

I masturbated – not a shocking event in itself – but it was the realization that I had done it with…with…with a…a…_male_ in mind that made it all the more disturbing. What made it even worse was that it had to be to the very male who had the ability to make me do irrational things; a fucking sinner who was turning out to be the bane of my existence.

Not good. Not good at all.

"Damn you," I whispered harshly as I lifted my knees and buried my face against them in deep set humiliation. I hated what I was becoming. I hated myself for giving in and especially loathed the knowledge that I had enjoyed every single minute of it. "Damn you to hell and back."

And so it was that I prayed and actually thanked Orochimaru for shifting Gudan to an earlier date; for every second knowing Uzumaki Naruto existed, only made my life a little more unbearable.

Maybe with his death, I could finally find some peace within this tumultuous heart of mine.

* * *

><p><em>Naruto:<em>

We watched the fireworks blaze through the night sky; knowing we had the best view in the house. We were lying on the hood of her brand new car; a gift given to her by Daddy Dearest as a birthday present. Her parents were pretty loaded, so it wasn't exactly unusual to receive something this extravagant especially since their only child had reached the ripe old age of seventeen. So for the past few weeks, she had given me permission to drive around with it as much as I'd like, and tonight, we had decided to drive up to the hills to watch the fireworks display instead of being stuck within the claustrophobic crowds in the city.

Out here, beneath the blanket of the stars – we felt like we were the only two people in the world. Out here, we were free from the shackles of society; free from the watchful eyes of her parents (who didn't exactly approve of me being a boyfriend since I wasn't exactly from an established family) and free from Kojima and his crony, who seemed to keep insisting she was not good for me.

Like they were the ones to give me advice about love and relationships.

I cradled her to me; my lips finding her forehead to place a tender kiss on it as she snuggled even closer with a sigh of content. It was a rather chilly night, but I could not feel a thing besides her warmth, her love, and the fact that she smelled so sweet and wonderful. Fact is, I couldn't have asked for a better way to spend the New Year. I really had to be the luckiest guy in the world.

"I love you," I whispered shyly into the thick pink locks.

She giggled and kissed the hollow of my neck tenderly. "And I love you too, Naruto."

Another wave of fireworks lit up the sky, and after a few minutes of companionable silence, she asked softly. "What are your plans for the year? You know I'm going to start college this summer, and I won't be around here as much."

"I'll come with you," I immediately replied; having already made up my mind to do so when she told me she might be accepted into Tokyo University. "We can rent an apartment and live there together." I reached out to clasp her hand; our fingers entwining and holding on tight as I stared into those breathtaking sea-green eyes. "Just you and me," I whispered softly.

"I like that," she replied sweetly. "Just you…and me…always?"

"Always…"

"So does that mean you plan on marrying me?" she teased and giggled again, but stopped when she realized I wasn't laughing with her. Even in the dull glow of the shadows, I could see her cheeks turning a bright red. "You're not serious, Naruto…"

"I am," I said firmly. "I'll save up enough money and buy you the best engagement ring ever, Sakura. One day…I'll propose to you and make you my bride."

For a long time, she said nothing, but if the tears welling up in her eyes were any indication, it was a sign that she did not disapprove of my idea. "You…you idiot," she sobbed, wrapping her arms tightly around my neck to whisper thickly against my lips. "Why do you make me fall in love with you every single day?"

"Is that a 'yes'?" I asked with a smile.

"I don't know yet," she replied, "but for now…let's just enjoy this moment together, okay? Happy New Year, baby."

"Happy New Year, Sakura…"

We missed the next rounds of fireworks as we allowed our lips and hands to do the rest of the talking…

…and tonight, two miserable years later, the loud sounds of fire crackers and fireworks only filtered through my window and into my enclosed prison like melancholy sounds of doom. I could vaguely hear the sounds of cheering and laughter from the folks watching, and it was only a reminder that I was probably the only person still stuck within the building while everyone else was outside enjoying the celebrations.

Lucky them.

What was the point anyway? I thought bitterly. I was now officially forbidden to even leave the sinners' quarters as all the guards and officers were on high alert to keep me within this section of the grounds. I raised my knees to my chest and buried my face within them, wishing I could block away the sounds of false gaiety of the fools who didn't seem to realize they were still stuck in 'prison' anyway. After tonight, then what? Wouldn't the morning welcome them back to being stuck in their filthy uniforms, having to slave around the grounds for little to no pay or being treated like nothing more than tools to be used? What was there to be happy about? There was simply no more joy to be had or experienced.

_Three weeks._

In three weeks, it would be all over.

I smiled bitterly to myself. What was a man on death row to do for the next three weeks? Spend each minute counting down the minutes until his head was chopped off? It had been a cruel thing to contend with; knowing that your time had been cut short due to a 'change-in-schedule.' Apparently, this year there was no plan to make the annual rite a summer thing, and it only made me wonder if the gods were really out for me. I really couldn't understand why there had to be an exception to the rules this time around.

With a groan, I flopped onto my back; only to fight back a wince as my aching ribs protested. Damn. It was all thanks to that asshole hitting me in a spot I thought I was already recovering from. Absently, I caressed the bruise that had formed there overnight and allowed my thoughts to drift to the fight – if you could call it that – with Mr. High and Mighty.

The guy was no joke…at least when it came to fighting, that's for sure.

In the few minutes we had spent on the dojo, I think I got a first-hand look at why he was probably the first captain (well besides him being the heir or owner or whatever of this place). The way he moved across the floor…it almost seemed like the guy was floating at some point. He was just that fluid and light on his feet. Let's not talk of the way he waved that _shinai_ around like it was weightless. He made it seem as if he was only holding a little stick, and yet each swing and strike of the damn thing had hurt big time. Even when we had gotten into the stalemate (a lucky position for me because I could barely hold him back), it would have been easy for him to attack me any way he wanted.

Funny thing was…it was the first time I had ever gotten that close to him; so damn close I had seen that his eyes weren't all totally black as I had first assumed. Though bloodshot – maybe he didn't sleep well the night before (good! I hope he had plenty of fucking nightmares) – there were flecks of dark brown or maybe maroon within them. His lashes were long too; almost effeminate and that skin…it looked like he hadn't had a scratch on it since he was born. It was too …smooth, and again, reminded me of fragile porcelain; like the kinds Sakura's mother had in her expensive collection. An irrational, gut reaction had been to reach out to caress the skin; to see if it was fucking real, but that thought was quickly wiped away from the next words that had slipped out of his lips.

He had literally asked me to beg him; to kiss his ass basically. Like hell. I mean, you really had to admire the guy's delusions.

I guess I really did piss him off with my response because I was sure he was going to kill me if that big dude hadn't shown up to block the next attack. Damn…I keep forgetting his name. And as if that wasn't bad enough, the circus came into town led by Snake Dude. It was the first time I had gotten to see the head honcho up close and personal, and I've gotta say that I've never felt so…_weird_ around someone like that before. Just from the way he walked and talked made my skin crawl with disgust…as if there were literally snakes crawling all over my body. I wanted to stay as far away from the guy as possible, but it was as if he had this hypnotic thing over you. You just couldn't look away. It was a major miracle I could even talk back to him or slap his hand away when he tried to touch me. Something told me I could have been taken out with just a look from him at that moment, but he managed to do even worse by telling me about the new date with my death.

Well fuck him…and Mr. High and Mighty too.

It wasn't until I was washing the dishes the next day, did something Snake Dude said finally sink into my troubled thoughts.

/ Besides, my dear fiery Uzumaki Naruto, there'll be plenty of time for you to show us your fighting skills. I so look forward to watching you in battle./

_Huh?_

What exactly had he meant by that? I thought Gudan was all about saying some shitty prayers and then waiting for my head to be lopped off by Mr. Wonderful? What was all this about some battle and getting to show fighting skills? Was there something Haku and Shikamaru had forgotten to tell me with their story about the ritual?

I hoped to meet up with Shika at lunch to bother him about it, but he was too busy helping with unloading of some supplies in the warehouse, and couldn't make it on time. By the time I got back to my 'closet' later that night, I was so tired and completely forgot all about what I had planned to bother him with. I snuggled within my thin blanket and just about slipped into dreamless sleep…but only for what seemed to be a minute because the next thing I know, someone's shaking my shoulder and whispering my name feverishly.

Oh fuck no! It can't be five o'clock already! I just got into bed for God's sake!

"Lemme alone," I groaned and burrowed deeper beneath the blanket, but whoever this person was, wouldn't quit.

"Wake up, Naruto," came the much louder hiss and harder shove of my shoulder.

"I said, leave me the fuck alone," I growled; sitting up and getting ready to punch someone's lights out. I was momentarily blinded by the lantern, which was immediately lowered to reveal Shikamaru's features in the gloom. What the fuck did he want?

"Come," he ordered firmly. "Someone wants to talk to you."

"Are you kidding me?" I muttered in disbelief. "I am fucking tired, man. I don't -"

"Asuma needs to see you."

_Asuma?_ Who the hell is…?

Ah…Big Dude. But…why the hell does he want to see me? What did I do now? All the same, I found myself crawling out of my futon, shuffling clumsily into my slippers and tiptoeing after Shikamaru's shadow as we did our best not to awaken the snoring men in the crowded room. For the next ten minutes, the man led me through narrow alleys that I didn't know existed; effortlessly moving within shadows as if he belonged and had fucking night vision or something.

He eventually came to a stop before a dejected-looking town house that was close to the outskirts of the sinners' quarters and gave a brief, but sharp whistle. It was reciprocated almost immediately, and with a nod, Shikamaru darted across the empty street – with me hot on his tail – and darted into the building whose doors had opened almost as soon as we arrived. It was closed just as quietly behind us and we both turned to take note of our host. It was Big…I mean Asuma.

"Sorry to have to wake up you when you must be dead tired, Uzumaki Naruto," he began with a friendly smile. "But I think you and I need to have a little talk. Come. Let's go downstairs where we won't be disturbed."

_Downstairs?_

He lifted some _tatami_ mats from the floor (may I just mention that this townhouse looks like no one's lived in it for years. There are pieces of broken furniture, roaches, cobwebs and dust everywhere) to reveal a built in wooden trap door whose hinges cringed as he tugged hard on the rusty handle.

"After you, boys," Asuma ordered.

Shikamaru went down the ladder first, turning holding onto the lantern as he did so. I followed with my heart in my throat and my head thumping as loud as a drum. As my feet touched solid ground again, I watched as Shikamaru went about turning on lanterns as if he was already familiar with this place. In fact, there was nothing much under here besides a wide empty space with some empty wooden crates stacked in a corner, a long work desk with a few old tools, and plenty of dust and even more cobwebs around. There was no window, so the air in here was musty and thick with the stench of age, and as Asuma descended the ladder, while closing the trap door behind him, that overwhelming feeling of claustrophobia was beginning to kick in.

"Pardon the abysmal conditions," the man was saying with a chuckle. "But it's the best I could do under the circumstances."

He dragged two crates toward the center of the room and motioned for me to sit on one of them…which I did gingerly. Shikamaru, who had been quiet all this time, got a crate for himself and I soon found myself almost sandwiched by the two men who seemed content to stare at me for a long uncomfortable minute as I squirmed in discomfort. I mean…what the fuck gives?

"It really is uncanny," Asuma finally muttered with a light shake of his head. "I've only seen a few pictures, but the relationship is clearly there."

"What relationship?" I asked in bemusement.

"The Senju," Asuma explained as he dug into his robe to whip out a pipe. Was he really going to smoke in this room with no windows? I was going to suffocate in here! Oh…and what was that about Senju?

"What's that?" I asked. "The Senju thing you were talking about."

Shikamaru finally spoke as Asuma was too busy filling his pipe. "He believes you're a descendent of one of the greatest crime syndicates Japan has ever known. The Senju. They were here before the Bakufu's existence."

"Ah…"

_So?_ A part of me wanted to scream. They woke me up to tell me that I was the descendent of some syndicate? Great. Were my ancestors going to rescue me from dying? If so, I would gladly join their fucking syndicate if it still existed.

Asuma smirked. "That 'ah' pretty much says it all. You couldn't give a fuck about your ancestors, and I cannot blame you. Believe me, Naruto, it is not the reason I awakened you at this ungodly hour."

"Well that's good. I was just about to curse you out and head on out of here for wasting my time."

"Fair enough." He lit up the pipe and watched the embers on his tobacco for a second. "I actually came to help you." His lips quirked into a smile. "I think you just might be able to fight your way to your freedom."

Okay, now that had my attention. I sat up with a start; eyes widening as my heart began to thud a little faster. He had better not be shitting me or toying with my emotions. What was he trying to say exactly?

"You heard what Lord Orochimaru said the other day at the dojo, right?" Asuma asked.

"Yeah, yeah, he said something about wanting to see me fight, but I didn't really understand what he was talking about. Shika said Gudan was just prayers and head chopping. He never mentioned anything about fighting."

"That's because the rules have changed," Asuma explained as he sucked in a lungful of nicotine. He expelled several clouds of smoke before continuing. "It seems that this time around, Lord Orochimaru intends for it to be a death match. All sinners destined for Gudan will be pitted against each other and the last person standing…goes free."

Wait…_what?_

I must have gawked in shock; because it definitely felt like my jaw had dropped to the ground at this stupendous announcement. Was he being fucking serious? I'd have to _kill_ people to get my freedom? What kind of a raw deal was that?

"That's…that's bullshit," I said out loud in a trembling whisper. "That's fucking bullshit! I might as well have _murderer _stamped on my forehead even if I do get my fucking freedom! What's the point? You send people in here for murders, and then you ask them to do the same thing just to be free? I thought this place was about cleansing folks of their sins? Why make them commit the greatest of them all again?"

"Ironic, no?" Asuma agreed serenely. He didn't seem taken aback at my rant. If anything, those dark eyes seemed to flash with some emotion that could almost be defined as…admiration? Or maybe I was reading too much into it. He glanced at Shikamaru; his lips quirked into a smile. "You were right after all. I really thought he was going to be happy about the news. Seems he's still got a sense of justice about him."

Shikamaru gave a wry smile and looked at me seriously. "Whatever the case is, Naruto, you've got to remember that when this news gets out to the other sinners set for Gudan, they aren't going to be as righteous as you are. They'll want you dead as much as they'd want their freedom, so it's best to be prepared."

I snorted and folded my arms across my chest. "I'm not killing anyone, and that's that."

"Oh? So how do you plan to be the last one standing?" Asuma asked with amusement.

How indeed? I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to think of some plan. Maybe lying low in the fray and waiting for everyone else to kill themselves before …

"Don't think it's going to be that easy, oh Son of Senju," Asuma interrupted with a snicker. "I can read you like a book. You think you can just lie low and wait for everyone else to kill themselves and then you can sneak out and claim victory? Hah!" He guffawed at my embarrassment, and I tried to huff with indignation.

"Look, I can manage it," I insisted with a firm nod. "There are ways to hurt people without actually killing them."

"Fair enough," Asuma agreed. "But after what I witnessed in the dojo the other day…you have a snowball's chance in hell to inflict even as much as a scratch on even the weakest of fighters."

Ouch. Had he just insulted my fighting skills?

"If I hadn't stopped the fight, Sasuke might have finished you off quite easily."

Hn. Whatever.

"…your stance is terrible. Your strikes are not strong enough. In fact, you can't even hold a _shinai_ properly. Have you never fought with the sword before?"

"I don't exactly go about waving that thing anyhow I like," I grumbled. "I told you, I don't like fighting or killing people."

"Which is exactly why you're going to get a crash course in _kenjutsu_ starting from tonight," Asuma stated firmly leaving no room for argument.

I opened my mouth to protest; to tell them that I had no intention of sacrificing my precious sleep just to practice for some battle I had no intention of participating in, but neither man was listening to me. Asuma had risen to his feet only to stand on tiptoes for a minute as he searched for something in the slanting slats that made up the basement's ceiling. He pulled down a _shinai_…and then another, while Shikamaru pushed aside the crates to make more room.

"Here you go," Asuma declared as he tossed the wooden weapon to me; forcing me to rise to my feet and catch it lest it hit me or worse.

God. Not this again.

I sighed inwardly and reluctantly gripped the now familiar handle of the weapon within my palms.

"To pick up a sword is to give your life to it," Asuma stated quietly, and for a second, I felt a jolt sear through me as memories of Kojima saying the same thing – only he used the gun as an analogy – flooded my mind. I looked up with my heart in my throat; fully expecting to see the tattooed older man before me, but it was only Asuma though he looked a little different now. He seemed to be standing a little taller; his presence even more imposing. The smile was gone from his face and with the way he was holding his _shinai_, it reminded me of the way Sasuke had held his before we fought.

"We might live in a day and age when walking around with a sword might be seen as a thing of the past, but we must remember that the men who once fought with them…fought for something bigger than themselves. We are as close to samurai as we'll ever be, Uzumaki Naruto, so do not take this weapon lightly."

I swallowed and gripped the _shinai_ a little tighter. I could already feel the cold beads of sweat forming on my brow and upper lip, and I licked them away absently. I couldn't show this guy that I was scared shitless inside.

"Prepare yourself, Uzumaki Naruto," Asuma continued in that same solemn tone. "For the samurai way of losing is death. You must wield your sword with pride, do you understand?"

I didn't, but I could only bite my lower lip and nod numbly.

"You saw the way Sasuke fought the other day, didn't you? You saw how effortlessly he seemed to fight? Well, that didn't come overnight. That comes from years of training from the day he could walk, Naruto. Five, six hours a day for most of his life, he spends honing his skills, and I've got only three weeks - give or take – to get you to at least half of his skill level." He seemed to smirk. "Even you don't want him to keep looking down on you, do you?"

I gritted my teeth as that smug visage filled my consciousness again. Asuma was right. Even if I had no plans to kill anyone, there was that part of me that still wanted to show up Mr. High and Mighty; to show that the other day at the dojo had been a fluke and that the next time we met, I'd be more than ready for him. Still…

"Why?" I asked quietly. "Why would you do this for me? Why go through all this trouble for someone you don't even know?"

The hard light that had once filled his eyes seemed to ease a little back into that warmth I had noticed earlier. "Because you have something within that's bigger and brighter than the darkness that surrounds you, Naruto. Even when your lips and mind scream for death to take you, your heart still wants to survive…to live on despite the many odds against you. The flame might be nothing more than flickering embers now, but it's still there; that passion and desire to win at all costs. That is why you have lived all these years. Hasn't it?"

_Damn._ Why? _Why_ the fuck did he have to be right?

My throat was tight and as he blurred before my eyes, it didn't take a rocket scientist to let everyone know that I was now openly sobbing like a goddamn kid. It was the first time anyone had managed to 'get' me so easily; for some adult to show me any kind of affection and understanding in such a long time. All these years, I had struggled to be somebody, and Sakura's acceptance of me was something I had latched on to with every fiber of my being. Hell, hadn't I even fallen for the notion that Kojima might have been the older brother I always wanted? I wept for what I could have had and what I could be, and the two men in the room seemed to understand that I needed to let this all out. They made no attempt to comfort me, though Shikamaru turned away respectfully and Asuma seemed more concerned with his pipe.

When I felt I was more in control of my emotions, I wiped my face with the sleeves of my yukata and took a deep breath. The time for feeling sorry for myself was over. I had to buckle down and prepare for whatever lesson Asuma was to impart to me. I would be an excellent student and practice for as long and as hard as it took.

"Now you've got to consider the sword as an extension of your hand," Asuma began once he noticed I was finally ready. He extended his hand to show me just what he meant. "Usually, most fighters tend to start off by pointing their blade at their opponent. Slash." He waved his hand downward. "Stab." He pointed a finger towards me. "Seems pretty easy with just the hand, eh? Now…imagine doing that with a _katana_ in hand, where you have to wield all your power into it and unto the air." He raised his powerful arms and slashed again; this time a little harder and fast enough to create a gust of air in the stuffy room.

Whoa. Damn impressive if you ask me.

He gave a small smile and held out the _shinai_. "For starters, your grip should be like so. Wrap your hand around from where your pinky is and apply no pressure on the thumb or index finger. Hold it gently, not as if you're gripping it for dear life."

I tried to copy what he was showing me and after a few tries – you'd think something as simple as holding a wooden _shinai_ would be easy but it wasn't – managed to get it right.

"Place your left hand to where the center of your body is and steer with your right hand…put the pressure in your abdomen…and then…"

I watched in awe as Asuma literally seemed to grow a foot taller before me. It felt as if he had sucked in the very air within the room and it was all concentrated in and around him. I couldn't breathe, and when he slashed the air with his _shinai_, I almost found myself ducking in fear he'd strike me. He didn't, but the effect was no different. It was the way Sasuke had come at me toward the end of the fight; the same dark aura of invincibility that enveloped him like a shield. Would I ever be able to have such an aura or presence with this wooden thing in my hand?

"So then," Asuma announced with a flourish. "Let's see you give a try."

Oh shit.

_Okay…you can do this, Naruto…just…remember what he said._

I re-gripped the _shinai_ as I had been told, held it to the center of my body, braced my legs apart while putting a little more weight on my slightly bent right knee…sucked in my abdomen and taking a deep breath…

"Ow," I hissed as I swung and nearly took off my shoulder with the awkward motion. The _shinai_ had felt heavy and clumsy with my strike; hardly as powerful and graceful as Asuma or Sasuke's had been. My cheeks burned with humiliation; the brief but painful memory of being laughed at while trying to lift Officer Dosu's sword coming back to haunt me with a vengeance. I really wasn't meant for this weapon, was I?

"Not to worry," Asuma said with a smile; though I could tell he was probably groaning inwardly at how much work he had to do with me. "We'll go through it again. At least another hour and I'll let you go for tonight, all right?"

"All right."

"Don't look so glum. We all started somewhere. Hell, even Shikamaru sucked big time before he got the hang of it."

"Huh? He can fight with a sword too?" I blinked at my friend in disbelief earning an indifferent shrug from the other man.

"Yes, he does. He looks like a lazy bum, but he's not exactly a slouch in the fighting department. On the days I'm out of town for assignment, he will take my place and be your sparring partner. Now." He clapped his large hands and motioned for me to pick up my _shinai_ again. "Let's go through this from the beginning. Hold your grip…"

And that was how it began; my secret underground training with a man who I would come to consider an ally, friend, and confidant. For the next two weeks, when I wasn't busy working myself to death in the kitchens, I would spend every waking moment – well as much as I could – training. I was immune to the whispers that had begun about Gudan being moved upward; blind to the fact that preparations were already beginning as workers went about setting up the arena of death. I ignored the pitying looks from other sinners as they realized my final hours were fast approaching; some even went out of their way to be extra nice to me; after all I didn't have much longer to live, right? All the while I suffered the aches and pains that came from grueling practices, in silence, though I realized that they made me mentally and physically stronger with every passing day.

My hands became raw from the many hours spent wielding the _shinai_, and on some nights, they would literally bleed, but I continued to bear it as best I could. I only had to think of a certain black-haired man training for all his life, to give me even more motivation to endure the agony with no complaint. True to his word, Shikamaru turned out to be a great sparring partner and though he was not as strict as Asuma, he was still stern enough to keep me on my toes when I felt I couldn't go on.

On my last night of practice – and at the time I had no idea it would be my last night with them – Asuma brought in a bottle of sake and the finest sushi he had purchased on his outing earlier in the day. As we drank and ate; telling each other funny (and dirty jokes), I swallowed the hard lump that had risen to my throat as I watched their faces beneath the glow of the lanterns.

I had only a week left with them, and come the day of Gudan – give or take – my life was literally going to be in my hands. I didn't want their hard work to go to waste and I was determined now to give it my all. I was going to fight; not just for me, but for the good men who would still remain in this place whether I lived or died.

"Thank you," I whispered thickly, which caused them to stop chattering long enough to look at me as if I was a creature from another planet. I forced myself to smile. "I just wanted to say that…for everything…you two…"

"Why are you talking as if you've already lost?" Asuma chided gruffly as he reached out to ruffle my hair. "Come on. We've still got a week to practice, and you've progressed so much in such a short period of time. You should be more confident."

"I…"

"You nothing," Asuma huffed. "Drink up and then you and me are sparring. Shikamaru said you managed to knock him down yesterday. This, I've got to see."

I smiled and blushed as Shikamaru bragged about my improved skills, but that dull sense of foreboding wouldn't leave me. All the same, I was glad that Asuma got to see the difference his teaching had made. I did manage to bring him to his knees, and his mock bow of defeat was the only thing to leave me with a sense of accomplishment as we said our goodnights and parted ways. Like always, we slipped within shadows and crept down, now familiar, alleys in silence and as I watched Shikamaru's back, a part of me (and not for the first time) wondered if we would have been the best of friends in the outside world. It really would have been cool to hang out with him for one day; to watch a baseball game, play at the arcade, or just chill out somewhere...being...regular guys.

"Goodnight," Shikamaru whispered when we finally arrived at the townhouse and came to a stop. "I'll see you tom…hey!"

I had wrapped my arms around him in a tight embrace; my eyes squeezed shut as I waited for that familiar repulsion of experiencing such close human contact with another male, to overwhelm me. However, I felt nothing and I knew why. Shikamaru had proven to be a friend; someone I could trust and confide in with no fear of being betrayed or hurt. Hell, you could even say I loved the guy.

"Naruto," he said quietly, but I refused to release him until he finally wrapped his arms around me as tightly as I did him. For a long time we remained motionless in our embrace; simply letting our hearts and minds do all the talking.

_Thank_ _you, my friend. Thank you for not giving up on me._

"Win," he finally hissed thickly into my ear. "You hear me. No matter what happens. You've got to win and get out of here. Promise me that."

"I promise," I croaked thickly; hardly pulling away as he did something I was sure he might probably regret in the morning. It was only a hard kiss on my left cheek before he pushed me away from him. He turned away before I could see the tears forming in his eyes, and with a final wave of farewell, he slipped into the shadows and to his side of the house.

I tiptoed into my closet and shut the door as soundlessly as I could; wincing as my sore body protested my decision to lie down. However, sleep wouldn't come easy for me; though I knew I had to milk the precious two hours I had left until it was time to be called for kitchen duty. I forced myself to conjure up happier memories of my time with Sakura, but was alarmed to realize that...

_I can't see her!_

...not so much that I couldn't 'see' her, but that her features, which had always been vivid in my memory, now seemed fuzzy and out of focus. It was as if I was struggling to put together pieces of what she might have looked like, and I felt a blind panic overwhelm me. Was I losing my memory? Or was she slowly dissolving into my past as so many other things before? I would have loved to ruminate more on this new discovery, but was interrupted when the door to my closet was suddenly opened.

I spun around quickly in readiness to fight (or flight) – all sores forgotten - but was immediately gagged with a dirty cloth to shut off my scream of anger and fear. I had only time to see that there were four guards and a stern-looking officer overseeing the events before I was robbed of my sight with a dark cloth placed over my eyes. I was dragged rudely to my feet, my arms yanked painfully behind me and my wrists bound in what felt like ropes made with wires. I sucked in a harsh breath and struggled to compose myself (and breathe evenly).

"Uzumaki Naruto, the final week of your purifications has been so ordered by Lord Orochimaru," came the sonorous voice of the officer as if reciting from a well-rehearsed script.

"Your Gudan begins today, Sinner, and any resistance will be futile."


	13. 13: Preparations

**Notes: **Holy crap! I write too much! *lol* But all for a good cause. Not much to say except read and hope it was worth the wait. Lots of stuff to digest in this one as well, but it's all setting up for the climax...which is not with Gudan as some of you must have assumed! There's still some resolutions to deal with and it ain't gonna happen with one fight. =/

Enjoy and as always thanks so very much to those who always take the time to leave a comment or two. I more than appreciate it as it lets me know all my aching fingers had not been for nothing. *lol*

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><p><strong>Chapter 13: <strong>

**Preparations**

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><p><em>The knell of the bells at the Gion temple<br>Echoes the impermanence of all things.  
>The colour of the flowers on its double-trunked tree<br>Reveals the truth that to flourish is to fall.  
>He who is proud is not so for long,<br>Like a passing dream on a night in spring.  
>He who is brave is finally destroyed,<br>To be no more than dust before the wind._

_-Heike Monogatari_

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><p>The new moon rises with each stirring of dusk; large, iridescent, and serene, it almost kisses the top of the mountains as it approaches its zenith. Many agree that they have never seen it so close to the earth, but those who are wise - and consider themselves a dying breed - realize the significance of its intimidating aura. The <em>festival-of-death<em> was finally upon them, and not even a change in schedule could diminish the pregnant anticipation that smothered the air. In the summer days, it was almost stifling with its intensity for the stench of the sinners' dying wails and decaying flesh choked those who felt 'purified' and free from their unfortunate fates. In this winter chill, however, where breaths created miniature fogs and bodies huddled together for warmth, the ambience was still the same.

The week of Gudan was upon them – too sudden, true – but it was still a time for the 'lucky ones' to prepare themselves for a yearly ritual they simply no longer questioned. They had longed learned that speaking of its barbaric nature was likely to result in a fate worse than death. The foolish ones who had protested in the early days...where were they now? Vanished without a trace and with nothing left to their names. Nowadays, most were avid students and followers of Lord Orochimaru's doctrines; blindly led by the teachings of the white-skinned man with eyes that blazed like gold when passionate about his unorthodox beliefs. For those who still lived in doubt - those who still dared to question such acts of 'mercy' in the form of executions – they had to be content with remaining in the shadows for speaking of such things aloud was likely to have you betrayed by the one you least expected. You could trust no one; not even oneself.

It was without irony that the very week of the 'festival' was quite somber. When evening fell, it was not uncommon to see most of the streets devoid of human or vehicular traffic. The people seemed content to remain within the safe confines of their homes lighting candles at miniature shrines to engage in hour long prayers or indulging in various purification rites. For those who were not content to remain at home, they huddled in restaurants and bars; bodies hunched over tables while nursing cold or tepid beverages and discussing the upcoming events beneath their breaths. They could name one or two people they knew who were destined for the afterlife, and though there were mild feelings of pity and regret, it was safe to say that they considered themselves grateful to still be alive.

In just a few days, they would be forced to march into Byaku-Shinkyou, to sit within the man-made arena, and to pass judgment on their fellow human while cheering in their loudest voices. Were they really any different from the Romans who garnered joy and entertainment from watching hungry lions feast on wretched slaves during gladiator battles in ancient times? Hardly. At least they were spared the agony of watching the flesh being ripped off from the sinners of today. Lord Orochimaru was indeed a merciful and benevolent leader.

May Buddha have mercy on their poor, lost souls.

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><p>As the horse <em>clip, clopped<em> quietly down the narrow street, it was hard to reconcile that this was the same busy intersection which had been bustling with activity earlier in the day. It was only eight in the evening, and yet only a few people stood around or walked by briskly in their heavy coats or jackets, as one or two cars sped off in the distance.

_Like a freakin' ghost town…_

The rider came to a stop before the inn – a townhouse tucked between a haberdashery and sword shop (though both seemed closed at this hour). A young boy – of about thirteen – stepped out of the shadows to assist the large figure off his horse, in turn receiving quite a generous tip for his services. He watched as his horse was taken toward the back of the building, before shaking himself from his dazed stupor and stepping into the inviting warmth of the inn.

Not surprising, it was hardly full tonight, but his large presence was enough to have the few heads in the room turning in his direction. They were just as quick to dismiss him, and not because of the hooded robe he was wearing that hid most of his features from view. They must have sensed he was not going to cause trouble as he gave a friendly smile to the old man (and owner of the establishment) who welcomed him with a polite bow.

"He is at the back room," came the hushed whisper after pleasantries were exchanged. "Kaide will take you to him."

"Thank you, Ichiro-san," the big man replied. He smiled at the pretty girl in the pastel kimono, who blushed in return and led the way past the low tables and chairs, and toward the back of the main dining area. She pushed aside the door made of woven straw, ushering him down a narrow corridor barely lit with lanterns hanging from the wooden walls. Though she seemed to walk as if on air; her feet soundless within her socks, he was embarrassingly aware of how loud and almost clumsy his were, for the old floors creaked and groaned with every step he took. She finally came to a stop at the last room and with a final bow and smile to the man, she slipped away as quietly as she had arrived.

He waited until she was completely out of sight before lowering the hood and knocking lightly.

"Enter," came the barely audible response, but it was enough for him to slide open the shoji screen door and let himself into the small private room. It was just big enough to contain a futon, which was already prepared for its occupant. Two standing lanterns illuminated the room and the silent figure that was sitting by and staring out the window. Dressed in a dark blue yukata, with a leg outstretched and the other raised to his chest, the long-haired man gave the illusion of being relaxed and unconcerned, though the newcomer was smart enough to know that wasn't the case. Beneath the slender build, raven ponytail, and unassuming profile was a man who could almost be considered dangerous.

"You look well...Asuma," came the softly-spoken greeting, though the man still hadn't turned his gaze away from the enormous moon that seemed to peek over the rooftops of the houses across the street.

"So do you," Asuma grunted in response, while settling down across his companion and digging into his robes for his cigarettes. "I trust you had a good trip?"

"Yes. I had no trouble. The people have been kind."

"Hn." He finally found them and lit one gratefully; faintly alarmed to see that his hand was shaking a little. He tried to blame it on the cold weather.

"The mountains haven't changed," came the quiet observation after several long minutes of companionable silence.

"Those never change," Asuma replied with a small smile. "Been a while, huh?"

A matching smile came to the other man's lips. "It has...I haven't been here since..." He shrugged lightly; allowing the yukata to slide off his left shoulder and revealing some more expanse of pale flesh. He made no attempt to put it back in place.

"The town has expanded a lot since then," he mused thoughtfully. "I don't recall half of the buildings I noticed while sightseeing earlier."

"That's because the sinners who got released settled down here; those who had no place else to go," Asuma replied dryly. He flicked away some ash into a jade dragon-shaped ashtray. "More than half of the people here are loyal to him because of that. They truly believe he saved their lives. Hmph."

He took a long drag of his cigarette and stared out the window as well, though he noticed the other man's hand had formed a tight fist on his raised knee.

"He can't wait to see you," Asuma finally said quietly. "...though I wonder what he's going to think when he does see it's...well..._you_."

The man's lips quirked in a wan smile. "Then I guess I owe him a big apology, hmm?"

"It's not going to be as easy as saying 'sorry', Mister. He's going to have a lot of questions to ask you...that or he'll kill you himself. Whichever comes first."

He chuckled and shrugged lightly. "Me being alive is an even bigger threat to Orochimaru and Sasuke's life. We both know that..."

Asuma rubbed his forehead and gave a weary sigh. "Don't I know it. It's a miracle you're still around to be honest."

_Indeed._

"How is he doing?" came the question barely coated with his concern.

Asuma gave a small but sad smile. "Take a wild guess. He's gone into that mode again where he's got to prepare himself for the 'rituals'." He quoted the air as he said this. "I hardly see him especially with this final week. He's either cooped up in the temple with the priests or buried in his Great Book trying to seek justification for his actions." He sighed again and banged his head lightly against the wall as if admonishing his failures. "Still...I have no doubt that this new format is weighing hard on his mind. He knows if he ends up with a stronger fighter...he might not make it, which is why I've taken precautions."

"...precautions?"

Asuma gave a light wink. "If my instincts are right, I think he just might make it through the battle at the end."

"You aren't making any sense, Asuma."

The big man sat up and leaned toward his companion in earnest. "There is this sinner called Uzumaki Naruto. He's a great kid with lots of potential, and my hunch is that he makes it through the main fight to face Sasuke at the end. What I am banking on, is that Naruto will not have the heart to kill Sasuke. Hell, I don't even think Naruto has the heart to kill anyone, but he realizes he's got to do what needs to be done to survive."

"And what makes you think he won't kill Sasuke when the time comes?"

"Because he doesn't know about it yet."

"...what?"

Asuma took another drag of his cigarette before crushing it out completely. "I did not mention that Sasuke would be his final opponent. For a couple of weeks, I trained him – Naruto that is – and made him believe that he'd only have to fight with the other sinners, and if he was the last one standing...he'd be free. I did not mention that he'd have one more obstacle to overcome."

A loud groan accompanied this announcement. "Why in God's name didn't you tell him? Don't you think it would give him more of an incentive to want to win? Or do you think Sasuke has a chance against him?"

"Well...there is that," Asuma replied with a rub of his chin. "But there is also the fact that those two have this...thing...this connection between them that makes it impossible for either of them to kill each other off." He paused as he recalled Sasuke just about to finish off Naruto in the dojo and decided he had better not share that particular incident.

"Are they friends?" came the innocuous question that had Asuma nearly choking on himself with laughter.

"Friends? Hah. Hardly."

"So your plan could backfire on you."

"Hn."

"What if Sasuke ends up killing this Naruto? What then was your purpose in teaching him to defend himself without telling him the whole truth? Were you so willing to risk either man's life just as an experiment?"

Asuma squeezed his eyes shut and counted inwardly to ten. "You see, this is why I hate talking to you. You always manage to make my good intentions look stupid." He lifted his lashes to glare at his companion. "Call it nothing but the hunch of an old man looking for any form of redemption. I don't know what's going to happen any more than you do, but I can only hope that either of them realizes that it will be pointless to kill each other…"

"And Orochimaru?"

"What about him?"

The long-haired man gave a smile that could be considered cold. "Do you really think he'll let either boy go if they decide to shake hands and call a truce? I heard Shimura Danzo, and a whole other hosts of delegates from the government, will be attending this event. I doubt Orochimaru will be pleased to see that no body counts – at least those that matter to him – would be tallied. He will stop at nothing to prove his power to those blood-thirsty fools."

He grit his teeth and turned to look out the window; his hands still clenched fists on his knees. "For years we have tried to eliminate him; assassination attempts or sending spies to infiltrate Byaku-Shinkyou, and what do we get for our efforts? More deaths and unnecessary bloodshed. Shisui believes that there's probably a spy among us; someone who tells him about our activities, which would be the only way to explain how he is always a step ahead of us." He expelled a breath of frustration. "Though we have done our best to remain in the shadows all these years, the rumblings are beginning that we were the ones responsible for the police station bombings. I'm sure you realize by now who was really behind all this."

Asuma nodded thoughtfully. It was a twisted and psychopathic way of running things, but then again, this was Shimura Danzo we were talking about here. Between him and Orochimaru, Asuma didn't know who was the lesser of two evils. However, it was his companion's earlier words, of those who had lost their lives in their effort to eradicate Orochimaru that hit him hard.

_What a way to end a life…_

Asuma could still remember Sasuke's expression when he finally delivered the news about Ino's death. It was not pretty. Was Death ever that way? The young woman had been disposed like trash…literally. Her mutilated body was found in a black trash bag which had been tossed into a compost pit on the outskirts of Kyoto. The morbid photographs taken by authorities were ones Asuma would have rather not shown Sasuke, but the young man had insisted on seeing them for himself; perhaps to clear any doubts he might have had and to verify that she simply no longer existed.

Asuma wasn't sure if he had expected Sasuke to burst into tears or rant in rage, and in retrospect, any of those reactions would have been considered normal. However, all Sasuke had done was look at the photographs with those dark eyes that had been unreadable and painfully devoid of emotion. He especially spent long minutes staring at the horrifying picture of a body that was barely recognizable. Who knew what hell that poor woman had gone through all in her quest to protect him? There had been no tears…no wailing…no justifiable rage expressed by the young man. All he had done was tuck the photos within his kimono, thank Asuma for his hard work, before turning back to the pile of paperwork on his desk without another word.

"He is hurting," Asuma muttered quietly to himself. "He's got to be."

"Who is?"

Asuma looked up and into features that bore similarities to the young man he had just about raised all these years in his stead. Besides the deeply etched lines on his companion's face, it was not hard to see the resemblance. Only he would know how agonizing it was for this man to choose his way of life all in an effort to protect the one closest to him.

"Your baby brother," Asuma finally replied with a sad smile. "Hardly a baby now, but…"

"I know," came the quiet reply. The anger that had filled those dark eyes were now fading to regret. "I know, Asuma, but there is something I must confess…"

"What's that?"

The long-haired man gave a smile and weak chuckle. "A part of me did not want to come back here. I did not want to have to face him after all this time. It made me realize just how much of a coward I really am…"

"No, you aren't. You had to do what you had…"

"Spare me your kind words, Asuma, as much as I appreciate them. I made him believe I was dead, and a part of me wonders what good my showing up now will do to him. I expect resentment, and though a foolhardy part of me envisions a loving reunion, I know it will not happen. I am, honestly, more than content to continue watching and protecting him from the shadows, the best way I know how."

"Well, it's too late to turn back now," Asuma replied with a nod and small smile of understanding. "I have done your job for the past fourteen years, so do me one big favor…"

"What's that?"

"Whatever you plan to tell him, it had better be good and worthwhile, Itachi, because I think he is going to need you now…more than ever before."

He rose to his feet and placed a firm hand on the other's shoulder to squeeze it gently in reassurance. "What's the worst that could happen, eh? Let's just hope that my scenario goes as planned."

"And if it doesn't?" came the quiet whisper. "What if it all fails, Asuma?"

The older man gave a wan smile and peered at the moon with an inward sigh. "Then I have no other choice but to take responsibility for my actions, my friend. That is a burden, I am willing to bear until my last breath."

* * *

><p>Shimura Danzo was a practical man; ambitious – yes, practical – most definitely. For though he exuded such admirable traits to the public eye (including being a charismatic and compelling public speaker), there was one other side of him that many failed to notice.<p>

His patience.

He had not gotten to his position as a high-ranking government official through transparent under-handed methods like most of his fellow comrades or opponents. Whereas some of their sleazy trails (prostitution, money-laundering, embezzlement, etc.) lingered after them like putrid stenches, Danzo always made sure his dealings with the underworld remained that way; unseen and untraceable by the gullible public. To them, he was nothing more than an old man who had seen and dealt with his share of hardships under dictators of past government administrations. He had been a blue-collar worker; rising from the ranks as a once decorated war hero to becoming a prominent voice of the people and a honorable representative in the DIET. His 'sudden' decision to quit his seat in parliament and dedicate his life to protecting the citizens of Japan, had been seen as nothing more than a selfless service to the nation. He would be working for less pay (supposedly), but with his military background, it was only fitting that he'd want to work with the foremost police force which had always been under the rule of the Uchiha clan from its conception.

Byaku-Shinkyou was considered the pride of Japan; an institution whose history has been so steeped in tradition, that anything less than excellence was frowned upon. It was why many had considered the Uchiha a bunch of snobbish, high-class elites; those who tended to look down on others because they did not fit their status quo. Danzo could still remember meeting the aging Uchiha Madara as a young man, and the embarrassing way he had been treated by the clan's oldest patriarch. He had not been considered worthy by the great military leader; seen as nothing more than a brown-noser and called out on it in front of other high-ranking Uchiha members. He could still remember the young Fugaku – the one who would eventually lead Byaku-Shinkyou – being in the room at the time. He was sure Fugaku had taken Madara's words to heart, for when Danzo returned years later to show his allegiance to the Uchiha, he had a feeling Fugaku had been keeping him at arm's length.

There was a coldness in their dealings; a polite tolerance if you will, and it had grated on Danzo's nerves to no end. No plan or idea he came up with was of any use to the new Uchiha patriarch, and his ire was tenfold when he realized that Orochimaru – from seemingly nowhere – had somehow ended up becoming Fugaku's second-in-command.

Orochimaru – a war hero himself – had been recognized for his contributions to the war, but disappeared for a few years from the public eye. No one knew where he was (or even if he was still in the country) and perhaps things would have been fine as they were (and Danzo felt he was slowly getting through to Fugaku) when he reappeared to the public's consciousness during a visit to the DIET with Fugaku. To say the country was shocked to see him after being away for so long, would have been a massive understatement. Everyone seemed to want a piece of the brilliant soldier, who would later admit that he had spent those ten years studying with Holy Priests and learned scholars of arts, medicine, and science in various parts of the world. No one bothered to dig more into this, but his influence was no doubt felt as he latched onto Fugaku and became his confidante and ally.

With Orochimaru now in his corner, Fugaku became even more powerful and in demand; so much so, the prime minister was in talks to promote him to the Ministry of Defense! What did that mean? It would mean that not only would Fugaku end up becoming the head of the entire military service, but more resources and power would be given to the Uchiha clan in general. There would be simply no limit to what they could or could not do, and Danzo craved that power and influence like a drug. He wanted to be a part of that innermost circle Orochimaru seemed privy to, hence he had gone out of his way to befriend the white-skinned man, who also appeared to have other plans of his own.

Danzo should have known from the beginning.

"With your influence in the underworld, and my powers with the military and police," Orochimaru had confided over a private dinner. "Do you not think it beneficial that we join forces to take control of a clan so infused with so much wealth and prestige?"

"…what's in it for me?" Danzo had asked warily.

"This…" He had pushed a blueprint of the entire layout of Byaku-Shinkyou before him. "You will be the one in charge someday, Shimura Danzo. If you simply leave things up to me."

So greedy and naïve had he been at the time, Danzo had leaped at the opportunity without knowing Orochimaru's true intentions. Fourteen long years later, it was apparent that his plans had been foiled. As long as Orochimaru lived and kept Uchiha Sasuke as the pawn in his quest to control power for as long as possible, Danzo knew his time was running out. He had been fighting back the only way he knew how; by blocking Orochimaru's appointment to becoming the head of the Ministry of Defense. As long as he lived, he was damned if he was going to make this white-skinned freak take control of this country. He had worked long and hard to get to this point, and nothing…absolutely _nothing_ was going to stand in the way.

He just hoped that one more obstacle would be eliminated with the festivities tomorrow. If all went as planned, then Uchiha Sasuke – the one last blip to this plan – would no longer be in the picture.

"Sometimes one most make allowances for good fortune."

Danzo shook himself back to the present; his lips turning down with disdain as he took note of what was now taking place. He was in Orochimaru's private quarters; having arrived earlier in the day with a few other guests. This particular invitation by Orochimaru hadn't been that surprising. They both needed to talk anyway, but Danzo would have preferred not to have witnessed the strange ritual Orochimaru seemed to pride himself in performing before his visitor.

For starters, he insisted that Danzo join him in a private underground onsen just off his bedroom, where the lanky man was be stripped down to his birthday suit and lowered into the steaming water by two priests chanting prayers beneath their breath. His white skin would then be pierced with large acupuncture needles in several places as he remained floating face up in the water; eyes widened as if staring at something in the caved ceilings no one else could. For almost half-an-hour, Orochimaru would remain this way, while the priests prayed and continued their mindless chant. Danzo had fully expected the man to either experience severe skin burns from remaining in the onsen for that long or at least bleed from where the pins stuck, but none of that happened.

When this was completed, the needles were removed, Orochimaru was helped back to his feet, and a parade of (actually six) effeminate young men appeared with towels to dry him off while applying sweet smelling oils onto his skin. A robe of fine silk and gold was then draped around his lanky frame, and his hair brushed until it shone blue-black beneath the lanterns' glow.

Danzo was a patient man, but even he had his limits to how much more of this charade he could take.

"What are you talking about?" he finally grated beneath his breath as Orochimaru sat daintily on his low gilded chair with armrests in the shape of snakes (hardly surprising).

Orochimaru smiled and licked his lips slowly. "I have found something new and delicious among my sinful flock."

"What?"

"Senju blood."

Danzo raised a brow. "Sen…ju? Impossible. They are a rare breed these days."

"True, considering your precious Bakufu dogs were responsible for wiping them out over the years. Somehow, one of them slipped through the cracks. I would have thought they'd be more careful."

"The Bakufu these days have no care for history or the past," Danzo replied with a snort. He helped himself to some sake that had been poured by yet another beautiful young man. Were there really no women in this place? Disturbing. "Do you think they'd really care about a descendent of the Senju?"

Orochimaru pouted and sucked absently on a strawberry. "This one is most delectable for I believe he just might be the son of one of those troublemakers."

Danzo sighed heavily. It was getting late after all and he had to be awake early for the beginning of the festival. "Troublemakers? If I gave you a list of everyone who has ever given me trouble over the years, Orochimaru, we'd never leave this room tonight."

"Hn." Orochimaru smirked and snapped his fingers. As if on cue, Kimimaro appeared from his waiting place behind the shoji screen doors to present a dossier which was placed before Danzo. Stamped on the cover was the word 'CLASSIFIED' and as Danzo reached for it, he gave the other man a wry glance.

"Go on," Orochimaru invited with a wave of his hand. "Read it and see what I mean. I was able to do a little research and came up with something you might appreciate."

On closer inspection, there were actually two dossiers – one for a sinner called Uzumaki Naruto and the other for…

"…what is the meaning of this?" Danzo asked curtly as he took in the photograph of the young man. "Why do you have a dossier on Minato Namikaze?"

"He was a wanted criminal after all. It was found in the archives of this place," Orochimaru explained with a small smile. "I do believe he used to work for…you?"

Danzo felt the blood drain from his features, but he managed to keep his composure; replying back curtly. "Minato was a traitor. Yes, he did work for the Bakufu, but only as a hired gun. He fled eventually and no one knew where he was. He was useless to me."

"Only after he decided he wanted to move on from killing your enemies," Orochimaru drawled as he pretended to eye his fingernails. "Must have been a trying job having to assassinate so many government figures who stood in your way. The poor beautiful man. Makes me wonder how he _really_ died…"

"Cut the bullshit, Orochimaru," Danzo snapped with a slam of his hand on the desk. "Why are you bringing this up now?"

Orochimaru's eyes flashed with dark intent. "The one named Uzumaki Naruto just might be his offspring, Danzo. Think about it. If he manages to kill Sasuke…wouldn't that be sweet revenge for Minato's betrayal? Of course assuming that Naruto survives the first round of battle." He grinned and revealed pointed canines. "If he regains his freedom…so many possibilities to end up working for you, hmm?"

"No, thank you," Danzo replied tightly. "I have enough of the syndicate as is. There is no room for one more."

"Are you sure?" Orochimaru asked with a sneer. "There's still time to make up your mind on whether you can take him away from here…for a good price."

"You are insane," Danzo hissed and rose to his feet. "Just keep your end of the deal and make sure Uchiha Sasuke does not survive, Orochimaru. I bid you good night."

He all but slammed the door shut behind him, leaving Orochimaru seething behind the cold smile on his face.

"That bastard," came the low growl. There was a loud crack, which had Kimimaro glancing sharply at his master. Orochimaru had snapped off the head of his walking stick; his knuckles so white, it was almost translucent. His strained and pinched features told of his fury, and knowing Orochimaru was in no mood to engage in chit chat, he figured he could slip away quietly –

"Where is that boy now?" came the sudden snapped question that jerked Kimimaro in surprise.

"The boy…?"

"Sasuke."

"Making his rounds around the dungeon as is customary."

"Order him to come to me when he is finished."

"Yes, my Lord."

He waited until Kimimaro was out of the room before flinging the walking stick across the room in frustration. His entire being throbbed with painful anticipation. It might be the last night he would spend with Sasuke, and he was determined to make it worth his while.

"My love for you is such that I must watch you die, my dearest one," he whispered into his clenched fist and squeezed his eyes shut. "You beautiful, tragic soul. I will at least give you a night of lasting pleasure you will take to your grave."

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke: <em>

_Reflection is the wisdom obtained from one's own thinking, not just from hearing others. It is the understanding of impermanence, suffering and essencelessness, from what one has grasped by the means of one's own intellect._

"You bastard! I hope you burn in hell!"

_It is the process of intellectually analyzing something to see whether it's logical or rational._

"Save me! Please save me! Good sir! I beg of you! Save me! I don't want to die!"

_Having gone through such a process, one can then accept a teaching intellectually._

"You condemned me to die! I didn't do anything and you sent me to hell! Let me out of here!"

_One may thereby become knowledgeable about the theory of Dhamma, and may explain it to others._

"I don't want your stupid food!" **SPIT.** "Go to hell you fucking fairy!"

Without skipping a beat, I wiped my face with a handkerchief and moved to the next cell. This was no time to get upset though I could still feel the low embers of fury within me at being treated in such a manner. However, I reminded myself that I ought to be used to it by now. One of the many rituals – and thankfully the last of them – involved a last visit to the sinners set for Gudan tomorrow. As their executioner (and usually last face they'd see on this earth), I was to provide them their last meals and pray for their souls. It was nothing fancy; just a relatively large rice ball and a small cup of blessed tea that was supposed to appease their souls. Unfortunately, there didn't quite seem to be any appeased souls tonight.

Of the twenty men set for their deaths, more than half of them had insulted or made attempts to harm me through their grilled dungeon doors. I was accompanied by two guards – who were handling the food and doing double duty as protectors – so if any of the sinners dared to get too cocky, they were prodded and poked back into submission. One of them had even had the gall to try to urinate on us; laughing gleefully as I side-stepped the weak yellow stream before he was beaten into silence.

_Sigh._

Typical. There really was no redemption for some of these people, was there?

_One may even be able to help others realize the fact of anicca, dukkha and anatta, but still one cannot obtain liberation for oneself._

"Well, well, well, a last visit from the prince, eh?" came the amused drawl from within the shadows of the dungeon before me. Though I could not make out his features, it wasn't hard to tell who it was. That slicked-back gray hair was unmistakable. It was the hedonistic heathen…Hidan. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"

I said nothing; simply motioning for one of the guards to hand me another plate of food and the drink. I stooped to my haunches and slipped the meal beneath the rectangular slat opening; only to gasp in shock as I felt my hand suddenly grabbed and my face all but slammed into the steel grille.

_Fuck!_

"Let him go!" came the growls from the guards, but it was pointless. Hidan had me in a death grip and I could feel my fingers nearly getting crushed as his hot breath whispered into my ear.

"I should perform the rite of Jashin right now on you," he hissed. "Lord Orochimaru understands, which is why he does this, didn't you know?"

With an effort, I tried to reach for my sword with my free hand; though the guards were still doing their best to push him aside with their bokken. The son-of-a-bitch still wouldn't let go.

"You would make such a beautiful sacrifice." The sensation of his abrasive tongue licking my ear finally broke my last reserve of polite temperament.

I finally grabbed the handle of my sword, unsheathed it, and without pausing, swung to make sure it was buried deep within the bastard's shoulder. His howl of pain was accompanied by him finally releasing me, and I rose to my feet just in time to withdraw my sword before he stumbled back into the dungeon with it. The thick metallic smell of his blood was a keen reminder of how long it had been since I had actually used my katana on any human, and the realization that I would be likely to shed even more tomorrow triggered something dark and inhumane within me. I flexed my fingers – nothing broken it seemed – but his long fingernails had left scratches etched into my skin which disgusted me.

"Haha…hahaha…" the fool laughed, though he kept holding his bleeding left shoulder. "Good one, oh Prince. That almost hurt."

I noticed he was also bleeding from cuts to his forehead and cheek; signs of the guards having inflicted some damage as well. Still, the man looked positively gleeful, and as he liked his blood, I knew I was dealing with a deranged lunatic.

_He might end up being the one I fight with tomorrow,_ I thought wildly. _None of the prisoners know exactly how it's going to be, so this man…if this man realizes he's got the opportunity to kill me…_

I spun on my heels and made my way to the last dungeon. I forced myself not to think of it. I had done well with that all week; choosing instead of cleanse my mind of all burdens and pressures I felt. I chose to be in the temple for the most part; content to remain in the solitude of Buddha and the priests, who were willing to simply pray and purify me as needed. I would not think of my battle tomorrow. I would not think of who I might face. I would not think of my possible death for I felt I was spiritually ready for whatever the outcome. Besides, perhaps it would be only fitting I finally join my family in the afterlife and even meet Ino and sincerely apologize for her tragic ending. Not even the sinners were treated to such barbaric techniques…at least I would have liked to believe that. Seeing those pictures of her body; that beautiful body that I had touched and explored for the first time in my life, become nothing more than a canvas for human brutality…

_Fuck it all to hell and back! I swear if I survive…no…WHEN I survive the fight tomorrow, I'll find those bastards who did that to you and kill them just as slowly and as painfully as they must have done to you too!_

I was unaware I had pounded a fist into the wall of the cave until I felt the sharp pain race up my arm and the subsequent bruises on my knuckles.

"Sasuke…sama?" one of the guards asked warily. "Is everything all right?"

"Yes," I replied with an absent nod; wrapping my bleeding hand with the handkerchief. "This is the last I believe."

"Yes, my Lord," the guard replied.

I already knew who's dungeon it was, and though I could still hear the cacophony of complaints being made by the other sinners, they seemed muted and dulled in this section of the caves. The adrenaline rush and explosion of anger felt when dealing with Hidan, as well as my thoughts about Ino, seemed to all come to a head as I approached the last cell.

_On the contrary, there is a danger that one may accumulate more mental defilements by developing ego since one lacks the direct experience of wisdom._

Even in the gloom, he literally seemed to light up the place; perhaps due to the blond hair – which had grown even longer since I last saw him, for it now kissed his shoulders and looked even shaggier than ever – or those piercing blue eyes that were trained directly on me. He was sitting against the wall; knees raised to his chest and an arm placed on them to hide his nose and mouth. He was naked…except for a loose piece of cloth around his waist. It was the first time I had seen him in this state, and I wasn't surprised to find that despite his slender frame, he looked…strong. There were still a few bruises here and there, and he looked in need of a bath, but that would be taken care of tomorrow morning. The sinners were given one last cleansing before being presented to the public. I wondered if he had heard the commotion with Hidan, and suddenly felt an inexplicable need to explain the reason for it.

He had not moved; nor made any attempt to acknowledge my presence. All the same, I motioned for the last plate of food and cup, stooped to my haunches and repeated the process; though a part of me stiffened with anticipation at being attacked again. Would I be better prepared this time? Would I be able to stab him as I did to Hidan? I paused and held my breath. However, nothing happened. Naruto was still as motionless as ever; and I began to wonder if he was actually sleeping with his eyes open. Was he even still alive?

Forcing myself not to be deterred by his anti-social behavior, I rose to my feet; clasped my hands and began to pray when –

"Don't bother," came the quiet statement that stabbed through the silence. "I don't need your hypocritical prayers."

I ignored him and continued, or would have if he didn't keep talking.

"I'm telling you, it's going to be pointless. Who do you pray to anyway? God? Which God? The one that allows you to kill people for your own cause? That's one fucked up God if you ask me."

I clenched my jaw and realized how stupid I was looking with my hands still clasped together. I would not dignify him with an answer, and yet my mouth had other plans.

"You are a murderer," I stated firmly before I could reign my words back in. "Your soul has been tarnished and will be…"

"And I'd do it all over again if I had a chance," came the words that sent a shiver down my spine. I looked into those eyes that were now brimming with an intensity that made me slightly feverish. There was a cold determination there; one that made me realize that he was capable of carrying out such a task if need be.

_And what if it's him tomorrow? What if I end up having to face this? But then again…it shouldn't be too hard to take him out. If his pathetic skills at the dojo the other day were any indication, eliminating Naruto would be much quicker than the guests would like. _

"If you had someone you loved," Naruto continued quietly, though his voice was loud and clear and seemed to resonate deep within me. "Someone who for the first time in your life, showed you what it meant to be needed…wanted…appreciated…what would you do if that person was suddenly taken away from you before your eyes?" He made a pistol with his fingers and placed it to his temple. "To have her brains blown out…_pow_! Just like that. Tell me, Sasuke…what would you do?"

It was cold…it was _supposed_ to be cool beneath the earth and yet…I could feel beads of sweat breaking out on my brow. _What would I do?_

(Ino…)

_What could I do?_

(Kaasan…Toosan…Nii-san…)

_I have waited for far too long…_

"What would you do when your life is on the line, Sasuke?" my tormentor continued with a grim smile on his visage. "What would you do when you find yourself being threatened by the one person you thought you could trust. Hmm? What would you do when you find a gun…pointed right at you?" This time he turned his pistol-fingers towards me, closed as eye as if concentrating and fired right at me complete with sound effects. If he had a real gun, I was sure the bullet would have lodged itself between my eyes. "Would you run away like you've been doing all your life?"

He couldn't have hit me any harder even if it had been physical contact. I felt my entire being flush with a heat so strong, I really was sweating more than I would have liked. Why was I standing here listening to this? Why was I allowing him to get to me like this? Was this a challenge? Was he daring me to become as brash and heartless as he was?

"Shut…up," I grated coldly; not sure who I was speaking to. Him or my inner voice?

"What's the matter, Sasuke?" came the low teasing question. "Having doubts now?"

"I swear to God…!"

"What? What are you gonna do to me?" he taunted. "Come on in. We can finish it right here and now, if you want."

I smiled bitterly. "You wish. You do realize I -"

I snapped my mouth shut. I couldn't tell him about the final battle…providing he survived the first. I straightened up and took a deep breath to calm myself. He was doing this for a reason. To rile me and get me out of my organized thoughts, but I had no intention of playing to his cheap methods.

"Enjoy your meal," I finally said. "Though I shall still pray for your soul tonight."

"Mighty kind of you, sir. In fact, you know what? I think I'll pray for you too."

My jaw must have dropped or at least it felt that way to me, and I was embarrassed to find my cheeks burning all over again. Composing myself quickly, I managed to spit out an icy, "Keep your heathen prayers to yourself -"

"Dear Lord," the bastard said aloud; completely ignoring me (as usual). "Please give some people the ability to see the errors of their ways and to realize that they are only being used by some sick perverted bastard like that Snake Dude…probably…because God knows what that guy does to poor Sasuke-_chan_ when they're in the bedroom - "

"_Shut up, Naruto!_" I hissed quickly as my humiliation and annoyance grew (the guards were still here for crying out loud). It took me a second later to realize just what I had done. I gasped as his eyes widened and a gleeful smile of victory came to his visage. Oh my God! I had…I had…

_Goddamnit!_

"Ah ha! You finally called my name!" the blond trouble-maker cried out in delight. "That wasn't so hard, was it?"

"You have…no…idea…" I growled beneath my breath as I focused my gaze on anywhere but that face that kept laughing at me. "…how…much…I…"

"…loved calling out my name?" Naruto taunted with a knowing smirk. "It's okay, Sasuke. Might as well get used to it since I don't plan on losing tomorrow."

_What?_

He rose to his feet and approached the grille, and it was only then that I realized just how close I had been to the damn thing all this time. Just one more step and he would have been able to reach out to grab me, but he did no such thing. He only seemed content to wrap his fingers around the cool steel bars and to grin at me; only this time, I could see that it didn't quite reach his eyes. For all his 'joviality', Naruto was still pissed at something.

_(me)_

"I'm going to survive," he said beneath his breath as if only for my benefit. "I don't know how, but I don't plan on dying anytime soon, so you had better start getting used to the idea of seeing and hearing about me from now on."

He seemed to examine me for a second longer than necessary, and I was ashamed to find myself recalling how my mind had been warped enough to imagine him looking at me in this same way when I…I…uh…pleasured myself. What exactly did he see when he looked at me in such a way? How did I appear to this sinner who seemed so sure and confident of himself and of his abilities to survive?

"Heh…" he finally drawled lazily; a wry smile on his face now. "Can't believe I actually almost had a crush on you too. Remember that time on the bus? The only reason I kept looking at you was because I thought you were a pretty hot chick. Who knew you were such a cold-hearted asshole beneath?"

My eyes widened in shock, and I honestly do think I forgot how to breathe for a few precious seconds. I was literally frozen in place; unable to believe he'd have the gall to confess such a thing to me in the first place. Not so much the insult. I had heard worse after all. It was the notion that he had thought I was…

_A hot **chick**? ME? A hot…**girl**? He thought I was a…I was…a **female**?_

Was this a new way to call me…_weak_? To emasculate me? To consider me not manly enough to be in control of –

/…almost had a crush on you…/

And what the fuck was that all about – ?

"Mm…pretty damn tasty rice ball too," came the commentary that jarred me from my disturbed thoughts. Naruto was back in position on the floor; eagerly consuming his meal before raising his cup in a toast to me.

"Sweet dreams, Sasuke. I'll see you tomorrow, eh?"

He winked, and I decided that saying anything else was going to be useless. My throat seemed constricted, and I definitely could not trust myself to speak. What the hell was wrong with this man? These were not the kind of thoughts I ought to be having after a visit with sinners. I should have been in a prayerful mood; in a state of Zen-like enlightenment at having mercy on their condemned souls and yet here I was, barely able to think straight because of some idiot's ability to say the most stupid things to throw me off kilter. It was a fucking miracle I could walk because I was a trembling mess…inside and out!

I eventually met a solemn Haku outside, and I need not tell you his reason for being this way. Thanks to his new 'friendship' with his 'dear' Naruto-kun, he had all but moped around all week; almost driving me insane with his need to remind me of my role in all this.

"Kimimaro-san came looking for you," he said softly. "He said Orochimaru-sama would like to see you."

I stiffened at this news; my eyes narrowing as I felt a chill (that had nothing to do with the cold night air) seeping into me. I couldn't imagine what he'd want to see me for. I do know I was going to have to see him tomorrow, as it was the day when he'd present the special executioner's katana to me, but other than that, I sincerely hoped he didn't expect me to join his special guests for dinner. Though I had applied my medication, ever since they arrived at Byaku-Shinkyou, the 'stench' of their evil and sins had permeated the air almost immediately. I shivered and gave a curt nod.

"Thanks for letting me know."

"Is it okay to visit Naruto-kun now?" came the quiet question; one he has been asking since we learned of the sinner's re-incarceration.

I glanced at the entrance to the dungeons, where the guards were still on duty. It was usually not advised for sinners to have visitors the final week to Gudan, but it was the least I could do for Haku. I shrugged and nodded in agreement.

"That's fine. Just let them know I gave you my permission."

I received a grateful smile, which made me feel even more of a heel than I would have liked. As I walked away from the East Block, I debated on whether or not to go to my private quarters first, but I decided against that. I would see Orochimaru first, see what he had in mind before leaving so I could get an early night. Besides, I was still in my uniform, which felt more of shield to me than wearing a mere kimono in his presence.

As I approached his domain, I braced myself for the usual loud laughter and music that accompanied his guests paying a visit, but I was a little bemused to find it no different from any other quiet night. He was not in the main living area; neither was he in his office adjacent to it. Assuming he had forgotten he had sent for me, I cleared my throat as loud as I could and knelt before his work desk to await him. Seconds later, Kimimaro appeared from behind a shoji screen door that led to his private quarters.

"Lord Orochimaru will see you in there," Kimimaro said with an expression that was hard to read. 'There' being Orochimaru's bedroom. 'There' being a place that – in the past – I wouldn't have minded going in, but now…

"I would rather not," I replied curtly.

Kimimaro seemed taken aback at my response. "Excuse me?"

"I said, I would rather not." I clenched my fists on my lap as Naruto's taunting 'prayer' came back to haunt me. I could almost see the blond idiot smirking in victory if I gave in as I usually did. "If he wants to see me, I'll be waiting out here."

A small smile came to the white-haired man's face and he nodded. "Very well. I'll let him know."

The screen door closed behind him again, and I found myself expelling a gust of breath. I had a feeling that this was not a good time to upset Orochimaru, but a part of me – a part that was gradually getting louder and stronger…

(and you know exactly why, Sasuke)

…was ready to face the music. If Orochimaru berated me, I'd give it to him twice as hard. Though this final week was supposed to be one of finding peace within oneself, incidents like Hidan, Naruto and now Orochimaru's cryptic decision to see me, was creating a tumultuous range of emotions within me like no other. I decided to distract myself by observing the room carefully. Were there hidden microphones or videos in here as well? Haku and I had managed to do a thorough sweep of my quarters during our spare time, and neither of us had found anything out of place.

I was still uneasy.

From my vantage point, I could see it; the sacred sword of Uchiha Riku – one of my clan's greatest warriors – which has been used to perform Gudan for all these years. Sitting before the large golden statue of Buddha in a private alcove just next to the room, it was displayed on a mahogany stand, sheathed within an ancient scabbard of the finest leather with gilded artistry and inscriptions. It was believed that the great Riku-sama had killed over a thousand men with this sword granting him the status of 'The-Thousand-Demon-Slayer'. Unfortunately, there wasn't much else about Riku-sama as all I had read about him were in faded historical scrolls in my father's archives…

The sudden sliding of the shoji screen door had me sitting upright in a flash. Orochimaru – dressed in white caftan, which just about blended with his flesh – stormed out with an expression that could be considered as irritation. I fully expected Kimimaro to be on his tail, but the other man was obviously not needed at this time. The strong stench of sweet oils and perfume (and was that opium?) almost made me sneeze, but I kept my expression neutral as he walked toward…and then around me. I froze as the soft cloth brushed against my skin – he was that close – and those smells grew even stronger. Fully expecting him to move back to his chair, I was stunned to suddenly feel his strong (but so damn cold) hands on my shoulders. To my horror, he began to knead them gently.

"You seem so tense, Sasuke," he drawled lazily. "You are usually more relaxed and in control during this time of the year. Or are you that worried about tomorrow?"

The hands were moving a little lower…down to my arms, which made me even more glad I was not in a kimono. I could feel the sensation of snakes crawling up and into my flesh; slimy, slithering creatures that threatened to make me want to vomit.

/What would you do, Sasuke?/

Surprising him, and myself, I rose suddenly to my feet; a hand firmly on the hilt of my sword. Like Kimimaro, he too seemed taken aback at my behavior, and perhaps it was a trick of the light, but I was sure there had been a flicker of uncertainty within those narrowed eyes.

"I am not worried about tomorrow," I replied; pleased that my voice sounded distant and in control. I nodded toward Riku-sama's sword. "Did you wish to give that to me tonight?"

Orochimaru's gaze had returned to being unreadable. His lips quirked upwards and he nodded. "Of course. Why waste time with formalities as was done in the past? It's a new year and a new way of doing things, so please…by all means…pick up the great sword, Uchiha Sasuke."

I spun on my heels and away from him; glad I could breathe again as I approached the weapon. As I stood before it, I felt a familiar surge of adrenaline run down my spine and groin. My fingers tingled with the urge to touch…to feel…to caress such deadly beauty. I could still remember the first time I was given the honor of wielding the sacred sword; of how heavy and wonderful it had felt. Now as I reached out to clasp it – call me corny – but I really did feel a thrill of power race up my arm in a rush. I almost felt invincible with the beautiful weapon within my grasp and I did not want to let it go…ever.

I unsheathed it slowly…admired the way the light shone on its fine blade (such fine craftsmanship) and sensing him behind me, spun around quickly with the deadly tip _just_ nicking his left cheek. Blood swelled from the cut immediately, and a cold grin came to his features as he darted out a tongue to lick it off.

"As fast as ever," he praised in a low voice. "Though something tells me that you wish it had caused more damage."

"I have no idea what you are talking about," I replied evenly. I would give nothing away; would give him no reason to suspect that I really had wanted to go all the way. My hand was steady, my gaze trained squarely on him. In this moment…this very second…I could kill him and end it all. I could make up for all the years of suffering in silence, of knowing he was possibly the one responsible for the death of my family, and for creating this monster I had become over the years.

(just one swing)

Perhaps I would have done it, or attempted to, but I felt something hard and cold pressed into my lower back, and I didn't need to turn around to know that it was Kimimaro. I hadn't even heard him arrive; another reason why any attempts on Orochimaru's life was likely to be a failure. With a loyal assassin like Kimimaro as his shadow…

"Just testing it out," I said with a nonchalant shrug. I slid the blade back into its sheath and clipped it to my side.

"And it's to your liking?" Orochimaru sneered.

"Perfect," I replied with a matching smile that didn't quite reach my eyes. "Sharp enough to cut steel. Just what I needed." I stepped away from Kimimaro and noticed it had been a pistol in his hand. He tucked it away just as quickly and gave me a warm smile.

"Just testing this out too," he said. "Works even faster."

I gritted my teeth inwardly and gave a bow to both men. "If that is all, I'd like to call it a night now. I have a long day tomorrow."

"Indeed you do," Orochimaru replied with a nod and a sharp clap of his hands. "I most definitely look forward to you putting up a good fight, Sasuke. Do not fail me."

I said nothing, but only gave another small bow before leaving his presence. However, instead of heading straight for my private quarters, I spent almost a good hour or two walking aimlessly around the grounds. Tonight might be the last time I get to see this place I had called home despite the 'strange' way I had been raised. I tried to memorize every stone and plant I came across; tried to recall my happier childhood memories especially places my older brother and I used to play or train in, and when I finally fell to my knees beside the small stream that ran close to the mountains, in exhaustion, I squeezed my eyes shut and found myself praying for some kind of divine mercy.

_Oh He who watches over us,_

_Please help me…for I am afraid…_

* * *

><p><em>Naruto:<em>

… _I know I act like I know too much, and I'm all brave and shit, but really…I am scared shitless deep down inside because I really don't know what to expect. Oh God…I don't know what you have planned for me, but whatever it is…please…let me make it through. Please send me a sign that tomorrow's gonna be a good da –_

"Naruto-kun?"

My lashes flew open at the hushed whisper of my name, and for a second I could only stare blankly at the pretty face peering at me through the grilles of my cell.

"Ha…Haku?" I asked with uncertainty; sure this was some kind of hallucination. They probably put those kind of drugs in the rice ball and that was why I was suddenly seeing my first…well second if you counted Sasuke…real visitor since I was locked up again. Apparently, part of the final cleansing rites had involved not having a damn person to talk to besides your shadow and your mind. After enjoying almost two months of relative 'freedom', being thrust back into the gloomy, claustrophobic prison was enough to make one go insane.

_(you really don't know what you've got until it's gone)_

I had mentally prepared myself for being tortured all over again, but all I had been subjected to was being stripped of my clothes and spending at least an hour or two a day being tied up and dunked in a large barrel warm water, while some weird priests chanted something when I was finally brought up to get some much-needed air. It had freaked me out at first, and I honestly thought they meant to drown me at some point, but I came to realize it was…of course…nothing more than a Gudan rite.

I was _really_ beginning to get sick of those.

To kill time in my loneliness, I 'practiced' my kenjutsu skills as best I could. I had no sword, bokken or even a stick to swing around, so I used my hands and arms, while trying to recall all that Asuma had taught me.

/The bottom line is that Kendo relies mostly on mental strength. It is the ability to think fast on your feet and to think two, three, five steps ahead of your opponent. It's all well and good to swing a sword around, but you must keep your mind sharp and think of tactics to throw him off guard. Sometimes the quickest way to win a fight is to be unorthodox. Do something your opponent least expects, and when you have an opening or have him at your mercy…you must strike immediately!/

Mental strength, eh? I wasn't sure I had much of that, but I had tried to memorize all the steps; from my stance to the rules of Kendo and the mantra I had been taught.

_To mold the mind and body._

_To cultivate a vigorous spirit,_

_And through correct and rigid training,_

_To strive for improvement in the art of Kendo._

_To hold in esteem human courtesy and honor._

_To associate with others with sincerity._

_And to forever pursue the cultivation of oneself._

Through all this, I wondered if I would ever get to see Asuma or Shikamaru again…hell even the boy now smiling before me. I would have hugged the kid, but I was still in a daze to move much.

"How are you feeling, Naruto-kun?"

"Wonderful," I finally replied with as much sarcasm as I could muster. "I feel as happy as a man likely to get whacked first thing in the morning. How 'bout you?"

He lowered his lashes, and I sighed at my snippy remark. The guy had only tried to be nice. Why did I have to keep acting like such a dick around him? "I'm sorry," I muttered. "I'm just…"

"I understand," he replied softly. "I guess I would feel like you do now if I was in your position."

"Yeah…well…" I scratched my head and adjusted myself. "Say…your master just left here. Guess he just couldn't resist my charm after all." I could spend all fucking day teasing that guy, now that I thought about it. It really didn't take much to get him pissed off, and a part of me actually found that it was kinda…fun (in a twisted way).

Haku chuckled weakly. "Yes…he always has to perform the final rites and give the final meals to the sinners since he's the one…well…"

"Nice job he's got there," I replied with a roll of my eyes.

Haku gave a wan smile and then leaned even closer to the grille. "Can I ask you something, Naruto-kun?"

"Sure." I moved close enough until he was literally whispering in my ear. Compared to the fetid smells (including yours truly) of this hell hole, Haku smelled like heaven. Just about the same way his damn master had smelled too. Hell, his very presence was like a breath of fresh air. Would I be considered weird if I wanted to sniff his hair for the rest of his time here?

"I overheard Sasuke-sama talk about the new format of the battle with Asuma-san the other day, and he mentioned that you'd have to kill the other prisoners to be free…is that true?"

I sighed. "Don't remind me. I'm still trying to figure out a way to get out of actually having to do that, but if push comes to shove…I'm not going to have much of a choice, will I?"

Haku's features broke into a smile. "I think I can help you with that, Naruto-kun." He reached into his kimono and withdraw what looked like a sewing needle, but it was pointed on both ends.

"What is that?" I asked in bemusement.

"A special weapon Zabuza-san introduced to me. You have to handle it carefully though because once it pricks you, you…well…die."

"…and how the hell is this supposed to help me?"

Haku wagged a finger as if admonishing me. "You die…but only until you are revived by the antidote, which I have. The needles contain a special poison that infiltrates the blood stream, slows the heart rate and in less than a minute, you are declared 'dead' by anyone who tries to feel your pulse."

"No shit," I gasped in awe.

"No shit, Naruto-kun." Haku giggled then froze. We both listened for any approaching footsteps, but all we could hear was the continuous whine and curses from the other inmates. "I would like you to have them, Naruto-kun," he continued fervently. It was as if he realized his time was running out.

"How do I carry them though? I'm only dressed in this darn loin cloth thingy."

"Tomorrow you'll be dressed in a yukata," Haku explained. "I will be waiting for you at the entrance to the arena, where I will slip the needles into it as you walk past. During the battle, use as many as you can without being noticed…and try not to hit any vital points."

"No vital points…got it." Asuma had taught me about those too.

"Don't worry about the bodies," he continued. "Once they are 'dead', the other sinners have to take them to the pit that is several miles away from here. I have made plans with the sinner in charge of them and he will administer the antidote to those you pricked."

"Phew…good to know. I was going to ask about that you little detail…"

Haku – to my surprise – suddenly reached out a hand (with some effort too because the space between the grilles were quite small) to caress my cheek. I fought against my body's immediate reaction to shudder at the touch and closed my eyes; forcing myself to relax and breathe evenly as he tenderly traced the outline of my scars. I didn't know if what we were doing was going to be regarded as 'cheating' but hell…anything to get out of having to kill unnecessarily and besides a few lucky few might get their freedom if all went according to plan. I really was grateful for him choosing to befriend a pain-in-the-ass like me. I didn't feel I deserved his attention and care.

"Thank you," I sighed softly. There was something soothing about his caresses…almost as if he was giving me a massage. "For…everything…"

"I have done nothing, Naruto-kun," Haku whispered in return. "If you win…you are free, yes?"

"Yeah…"

"Then you and I must meet in the outside world someday and do a lot of fun things together, eh?"

I lifted my lashes and gave him a warm smile. "Sure. Something tells me you need to get out more often anyway."

He blushed and giggled again, and before I could stop myself, I caught his fingers and squeezed them gently. Soft yet strong. "You better get going," I said aloud yet with regret. "Methinks your master's going to need you tonight."

"Why do you say that?" Haku asked with a cock of his head in bemusement.

I smiled as the memory of Sasuke's flustered and shocked expression filled my mind. I knew I had kicked off something within Mr. Righteousness, and if my hunch was right then…

"Just…take care of the guy," I replied with a light shrug. "He's got some real issues he's got to solve on his own and you might be the one he needs to be his moral support."

Haku opened his mouth as if to say something, but shook his head instead. "Oh…okay…if you say so…although…"

"Although what?"

"Sasuke-sama and I do not have that kind of a relationship. I will protect him with my life, do not misunderstand me, but he is not the kind to share his thoughts and concerns with me. I am nothing more than a tool for him and …"

I squeezed his fingers a little harder before releasing them. "A tool? Yeah right. If you're a tool, then you're the goddamn sharpest one in the shed, and if I win tomorrow, I owe you my fucking life."

I heard the shuffling footsteps of a guard approaching and motioned for Haku to rise to his feet as I scooted back into the shadows. He was just in time to act as if he had been doing nothing for the stern-faced guard appeared with a bemused glance at us.

"All done here, Haku-san?" he finally asked.

"All done," came the quiet reply. "Thanks for allowing me to stop by." He threw me a quick glance and a reassuring smile, which I was more than grateful to receive. However, once he was gone, and the heavy cloak of loneliness befell me again, I squeezed my eyes shut and continued my fevered prayers from where I left off.

…_you work pretty fast, oh God, by sending Haku to me, so please…please don't make me accidentally stab myself with the needles. It would be pretty embarrassing if I ended up committing suicide after all the shit I've been through. Oh…and just in case this does end up being my last night on earth…could you at least give me a dream I can be happy with? Maybe with Sakura-chan and I together again? I really would appreciate it. Thank you._

I sighed and prepared myself for a sleepless night, but to my surprise – and perhaps it was due to my prayers – I slipped effortlessly into a world where there was no talk of death or of suffering. In this world, I walked with my head held high and with a heart that felt as light as a feather. I was on my way to meet someone – that much was certain – and as I approached the beautiful park fully expecting it to be my love…my life…my precious dear Sakura waiting on the park bench, God (how cruel he could be) had the last laugh as I was greeted by a now all too familiar figure with twin pools of darkest night that seemed to look through me and deep into my soul.

_It is time, Uzumaki Naruto,_ they seemed to say. _It is finally…our time._


	14. 14: Gudan 1

**Notes: **To bridmatt, SilverSauce, Narutofan143 (aka Nana), ThroughdarknessandLight, and Opalynne...THANK YOU for your comments on the last chapter! *bows gratefully* You always manage to bring a smile to the face when I see your names in my inbox, so I really do appreciate you taking the time to leave a word or two. Hopefully this chapter gets you (and other readers) yapping a little more. So...enjoy! XD

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 14: Gudan<strong>

_Though I know indeed  
>That the night will come again<br>After day has dawned,  
>Still, in truth, I hate the sight<br>Of the morning's coming light._

_**Fujiwara no Michinobu**_

* * *

><p><em>Dawn breaks with the solemn rise of the sun from behind the mountains; its weak yellow light diffused by the thick layer of fog that descends from the heavens. <em>

In town, its inhabitants diligently awaken with zombie-like motions in preparation for the long day ahead. Children, too young to participate, are left with the old ones too weary to be bothered with the ritual. There is a tense feeling of anticipation as they bundle up in warm clothes, lock their doors and begin the journey to a venue that promises retribution through 'merciful' death. Neighbors, friends, and strangers nod in silent acknowledgement to each other as they converge on the streets. The 'outsiders' – those from neighboring towns and even as far as other prefectures – mingle with the growing crowd and try to engage in polite conversation. For some reason, they cannot look each other in the eye even as lips form empty syllables. It is sometimes shameful to admit that they eagerly welcome the brutal punishment deserving of those sinners. It is shameful that they sometimes feel a thrill with the descent of the sacred blade or listening to the wails of despair from the condemned. For what it's worth, they justify their feelings by claiming that these lost souls are being redeemed after all.

No one pays much attention to the two men dressed in nondescript hooded dark robes, for they blend easily into the throng of shuffling townsfolk. Today, the roadsides are lined with several watchdogs on duty; primarily to make sure everyone behaves themselves and there are no scuffles or unnecessary fights. The hooded men dutifully bow their heads as they walk past each officer; giving the impression they are completely subservient in their positions.

However, as they cross the bridge which will lead them to their final destination, and as the sudden heavy _dum dum dum_ sound of the sacred drums and gongs being struck echoes across the landscape from within the towering walls of Byaku-Shinkyou, it is clear that one of the men is greatly affected by this, for his hands form tight fists within his robes. His companion spares him a quick look of sympathy, but knows this is no time to focus on past regrets. Sharp dark eyes survey their surroundings and take mental snapshots. Their plan today is to go without a hitch and every opportunity has been taken to make sure their sleepless nights were not for naught. He nods (barely) in acknowledgment to the people he seeks for they too blend into the crowd being ushered into the grounds by either uniformed officers or toga'd guards.

So far. So good.

The younger of the two seems hesitant as he comes to the threshold. Though he is jostled and shoved by the impatient ones, he is almost frozen and seems to have forgotten the simple task of walking. One more step will take him into a place he has not seen in over fourteen years, and though he cannot help noticing slight changes here and there…

_I am home again._

...it is still as beautiful as it has always been. Nostalgia – like a sudden bout of nausea – makes him weak-kneed and he nearly stumbles, but strong and familiar hands grasp his upper arm to steady him. He meets the fierce (stern) gaze trained on him and forces himself to gather his composure. He has come here for one reason and one reason alone. If all works out as planned…then it will simply be the first step to recovering what was once lost all those years ago.

They could not afford to fail now.

* * *

><p><em>Dawn breaks with the solemn rise of the sun from behind the mountains; its weak yellow light diffused by the thick layer of fog that descends from the heavens.<em>

Kimimaro finds him sitting as motionless as the sacred statue he is beneath. His eyes are closed, his legs crossed Indian style, and hands placed on them in the traditional meditative state. His alabaster skin literally glows beneath the golden hue of Buddha's shadow; his long black hair a cloak around his silk-clad form. It's opened to reveal he is wearing nothing beneath and though this is hardly the time or place to admire his master and lover's body, Kimimaro knows he is weak to such blatant temptation.

However, he is still extremely sore from his master's 'punishment' last night. Sasuke's insubordination had triggered Orochimaru's ire and frustration to its limit, and as always, Kimimaro found himself being the physical punching bag. His wrists, ankles, and neck still bore the bruises from being shackled; his skin still tingled from the lashes he had received; some hard enough to leave welts on his backside though he had pleaded and begged for mercy. Through his silent tears, he suffered indignities he could never mention to anyone; all masked beneath a subservient attitude that did nothing to appease his insatiable and furious lover. In the end, he was left 'discarded' on the floor; aching, bruised, sticky with cum from not just his master, but two of his guests who had been invited to watch and partake of the humiliating acts.

(broken yet again)

He sighs inwardly and kneels before the podium; patiently waiting for his master to be done with his ritual before leading him to his inner sanctuary where he'll then be purified for the festivities. The guests, including Lord Danzo, have already been taken to the dining hall for a quick breakfast after which they'd be escorted to the outdoor venue. Kimimaro can already hear the excitable cacophony of the townsfolk and visitors culminating in a dull hum within the hallowed walls. He closes his eyes and listens to the dull thrum of the sacred drums and gongs; feeling the familiar adrenaline rush of excitement course through him at the prospect of witnessing something powerful yet different with this year's Gudan.

He has performed the role of executioner a few times in the past where there is a feeling unlike any other when taking the life of those who do not deserve to live. However, this new format was nothing short of intriguing. This could be the day when the executioner could find himself being the hunted; the one desperate to live. He licks his lips at the notion of seeing Sasuke at his wit's end should he have to face a sinner stronger than he. Kimimaro has his money put on the one named Hidan. He is more than familiar with the follower of Jashinism and his hideous crimes. Those who practiced the religion tended to have a high threshold for pain and sometimes felt they were immortal. It was sometimes literally impossible to kill some of them by 'normal' means, hence beheading would have been the best way to go. He has no doubt the zealot will win the battle royale and face Sasuke in the end, and if all goes well…then…

_It will be sad to watch you die, Sasuke…but you really have served your purpose for Lord Orochimaru and he needs you no longer. I thought we'd have bonded. I was willing to be your big brother, but you seemed so intent on distancing yourself from me…from us. A grave pity. You had so much potential…_

"Kimimaro," comes the sudden low call that has the younger man sitting up with a start of surprise. His master is still in position, but those guarded, watchful and piercing green eyes are now trained squarely on him.

"My Lord?" he finally replies with a bow of his head to the floor.

"Is everything prepared?"

"As you have requested."

He pauses. "And Danzo?"

"Having breakfast with the others."

"He said nothing to you?"

Kimimaro shakes his head. "Nothing of significance, my Lord. Though he kept glancing at his watch with impatience."

"Of course. Why expect anything different from that old fool?"

_/Just stick to your end of the bargain…/_

A small smile comes to the thin lips, which are licked slowly in satisfaction. He closes his eyes, takes a deep breath and lifts his lashes to look out the windows where thin blades of pale sunlight struggle to push their way through.

"It's a good day," he finally whispers more to himself than to his companion. "A very good day to die."

* * *

><p><em>Dawn breaks with the solemn rise of the sun from behind the mountains; its weak yellow light diffused by the thick layer of fog that descends from the heavens.<em>

Sleep had not come easy last night, and he awoke long before the sun's arrival. If Haku was surprised to see his master already dressed and paying his daily tributes at the small family shrine, he said nothing but went about his duties with a million butterflies fluttering within the pit of his stomach. His outward expression was one of quiet calm and (possible) indifference; simply giving nothing away. However, the poison-tipped needles – though light as feathers – sat heavily and seemed to weigh a ton within his kimono. As he quietly served his master, he feared that even one false move would reveal the key to Naruto-kun's victory. However, his master seemed…_different_ this morning. He couldn't quite put his finger on it. There was no fear on Sasuke's face; neither did he look angry and discontent with the world. There was a strange sense of calm and purpose; an aura that threatened to keep Haku away, though he politely thanked his manservant for the meal which was then eaten with measured bites and sips.

He knelt in his usual position a few feet away to observe his master eat in silence.

_You won't kill Naruto-kun, will you?_

His hands clenched tightly on his lap and he bit his lower lip hard enough to draw blood.

_Please…Sasuke-sama…please tell me you won't kill Naruto-kun if he makes it to the final round?_

It would be too cruel. Too horrible to imagine that after going through such a brutal battle, he'd still be executed. Why else would Sasuke-sama have the sacred sword of Riku-sama in his possession? Why else would he be dressed in his ceremonial garb consisting of a white _kamishimo,_ with the Uchiha family _mon_ etched on its back, and a black and purple striped _hakama_? Was that the plan all along? He hadn't really caught all of the conversation about the new rules of Gudan, all the same…if Lord Orochimaru's intentions was still to eliminate even the last man standing then…

_It was nothing but a waste of time. All our plans would have been for a lost cause. I'm so sorry, Naruto-kun. So, so, so, so, sorry..._

"Haku."

Haku lifted his miserable gaze from his pale hands to look at his master, and for a second, felt something sharp - a deep pang - pierce through his chest and into his heart as he stared at the strong and handsome profile before him. Was it possible for a person to be born 'perfect'? Was it the way his master's dark hair fell just so? Was it the slightly long lashes? The deep set dark eyes? The straight nose? The strong cheekbones? Those slightly full lips? The tightened jaw? The powerful neck? That porcelain skin that never seemed to favor the sun no matter how long he spent outside? Was it the strong hands with its lean fingers? Or a toned physique that Haku had been lucky to worship with his hands during his massages?

No...it was none of those things. It was none of those 'perfect' physical attributes at all. He loved his master. He really did, but it was not for the physical. This love was beyond that. It was deep rooted in a sense of loyalty and devotion; of knowing a side of Sasuke-sama that no one else would ever know. It was the side that had watched his master suffer in silence all this time; this side that was too proud to share his fears and innermost thoughts with him.

_/Just…take care of the guy. Methinks he's going to need you…/_

Haku smiled sadly._ Naruto-kun…were you able to see something I've been unable to see all this time? _

"My Lord?" he finally called out quietly when it seemed like Sasuke wasn't planning on speaking anytime soon. He noticed that his master had barely eaten half of the meal set out for him, not that Haku could blame him. It was probably not easy being able to digest anything knowing that you were probably going to be…

_No! No! No! It's not going to happen!_

"It's a beautiful morning, isn't it?"

_Huh? _

Haku blinked in surprise at the low random statement/question, and finally forced his gaze to look through the opened shoji screen doors with its breathtaking view of the gardens and mountains in the horizon. Sasuke-sama was right. The fog was finally beginning to lift and pearly dew drops on the leaves and flowers gave the illusion of having rained the night before. There was a fresh tangy scent in the air, and though the haunting sounds of the sacred drums and gongs went off in the distance, it couldn't break through the tranquility of their surroundings. It would have been a perfectly wonderful morning…if both men didn't realize just what lay ahead.

"Yes," Haku finally replied softly. "It is a beautiful morning, my Lord."

Sasuke gave a light grunt in agreement and rose to his feet. He motioned for Haku to bring the sacred sword to him, which was done with slight trepidation. There was something about holding onto the somewhat heavy weapon that always made him break out in a cold sweat, and as he handed the ancient but powerful sword to his master, he obediently stood close by; watching as Sasuke attached it expertly to his obi in quick snaps and tugs. He would not need his regular _katana_ and _wakizashi_ today. Riku-sama's sword would be more than enough to carry out whatever he had to do.

With the sword finally secure, Sasuke seemed to take a deep breath, and Haku – assuming that his work was done – prepared to clear away the tray when he felt the strong and steady hand suddenly placed gently on his head. He felt his cheeks burn with insuppressible heat as he met the dark unreadable eyes before him, and though he had so many questions to ask and so many things to say, they all seemed trivial to the two simple words uttered at him.

"Thank you."

His vision blurred almost immediately, and he had to bite his lower lip to stop them from quivering. Sure Sasuke-sama had thanked him a lot of times in the past, but there was something so deeply genuine and heartfelt about it this particular time around. Was it the timbre of his voice? Or that same inscrutable expression in his eyes? Was it the small smile that threatened to appear on his face before a sound from the outside eradicated it just as quickly as it had appeared? They both turned to notice the four officers awaiting him. They were his escorts to the venue...not that he didn't know the way there, but it was tradition after all.

With a final pat on his servant's head, Sasuke spun on his heels to join them and would have been glad to leave with no queries asked, when the sudden call of his name had him turning back with a raised brow of surprise.

It was Haku – of course – whose tears had finally broken free to trickle down his cheeks silently. He opened his mouth to speak, but the words seemed lodged somewhere in his throat. Sasuke, sensing the officers were uncomfortable with this scene and wanting to spare his servant any more embarrassment, prodded him gently.

"What is it, Haku?"

He clutched fistfuls of his kimono and took a deep breath, before bowing deeply. "I vow to keep my promise to Naruto-kun!" he cried out in a rush. "No matter what happens...I promise...I will take care of you until my dying breath!"

He failed to see the reaction this caused on his master's visage, and perhaps if he had, he would have noticed the flicker of uncertainty and confusion that had filled those dark eyes. Either way, it was too late to do so now, for when he finally managed to lift his head, all he could see was the gentle sway of the plants and trees before him as well as the faint and receding steps of the other men.

_Sasuke...sama..._

The sudden change in the drum beats had him jerking out of his reverie. He had little to no time to make it to the arena, and as he dashed back into the house to finish up his chores; his mind whirled with countless possibilities, many of which involved an (happy) ending that he sincerely prayed for.

No matter how impossible it might seem.

* * *

><p><em>Dawn breaks with the solemn rise of the sun from behind the mountains; its weak yellow light diffused by the thick layer of fog that descends from the heavens.<em>

He was already on his third cigarette and he still could find no relief; not from the cold weather or the cold weight filling his heart. There were dark rings beneath his eyes and he generally felt like shit. Though he had spent the better part of the night with Asuma, either staring morosely at the flickering fire in their hideout, or forcing himself to smile at the jokes the older man tried to crack to break the tension, it was Asuma's eventual revelation of what was to happen today (besides the obvious) that made him sick to his stomach.

Sasuke's brother was still alive, and not only that, there was a damn pretty risky plan this so-called Akatsuki folks had come up with. There was no doubt that if it went as planned, some lives would be lost, but it was a risk they were willing to take.

_Stupid,_ he thought angrily but wearily. _This is all so fucking stupid._

He gazed blearily at the other sinners around him; they too looking as miserable as he felt. They were the unfortunate crew set to take out the dead and clean up the ring after the blood bath. They hovered in the underground tunnel where the condemned would be brought out from their dungeons to face the screaming mass of spectators now filling the stands. Shikamaru's ears rang with the loud thud of the drums and gongs being struck, and every now and then the thunderous roar of the crowd would add to his already blinding headache. He squeezed his eyes shut and placed a finger to his temple. Though this was only his second time witnessing Gudan, the craziness was still as potent as ever. He couldn't understand why humans would enjoy the concept of watching people die in such a manner.

_Just do your best, Naruto,_ he thought as he lifted his lashes to stare blindly at the rocky ground. _I know you can do it, you stubborn bastard. I don't want to be the one to carry your dead body out of there. I don't think I could take it._

He and Asuma had done the best they could with the little time they had. It was now up to Naruto to pull out all and every skill he had ever learned – not just from them – but from his life on the streets. Sometimes battles were won with the head and not just whatever weapon was placed in your hand.

He lifted his gaze to stare out to the arena as another thunderous cheer went up. It was quickly followed by the nearly delirious chants of 'Orochimaru-sama! Orochimaru-sama! Orochimaru-sama!' It was clear that the overseer of this affair was finally in the building. The gruesome show was about to begin.

Shikamaru – as well as the other sinners on duty – seemed to straighten up from their slouched positions. He walked closer to the exit, where he had a much better view of the intimidating arena. Sure enough, the balcony reserved for the V. was rapidly filling up with the dignitaries. Lord Orochimaru looked resplendent in a black gown embroidered with golden snakes to match the elegant staff he wielded in his right hand. He lifted his arms and the crowd went absolutely insane with their adulation of the man they seemed to see as their god. He basked in their love and stated as such; his voice booming over them all via loud speakers set around the nearly 15,000-seat arena now filled to capacity.

"My dear ones," he began with a flourish. "We are gathered here today...!"

Shikamaru skipped over Orochimaru to notice that Kimimaro was – as always – standing behind him dressed in similar clothing. Sakon and Ukon were also on guard; though they seemed hidden further into the shadows of the roof protecting them. Among the dignitaries, Shikamaru could make out Lord Danzo, who remained sitting with an expression of absolute indifference to the proceedings. The others seemed more excited and chattered eagerly amongst themselves, every now and then taking a sip of their expensive drinks or munching on a finger food. Each official also had their servants or guards, which made for a rather cluttered V.I.P section.

_This could be a little tough..._

Feeling the back of his neck prickle with awareness, he lowered his gaze back to eye level to notice Asuma blending in with the other officers of his rank. The big man gave him a light wink and barely noticeable nod, which Shikamaru returned. Asuma made a motion with his left hand, which to anyone else would look like he was simply waving something away from his face, but it was a signal to Shikamaru to turn his gaze to the five o'clock position. Sure enough, there they were; two of the most powerful remnants of the Uchiha clan sitting several spaces apart in the lower section of the seats next to the entrance. There was really nothing to distinguish them from anyone else and Shikamaru might have dismissed them if it wasn't for Asuma telling him of what to look out for. Asuma had also said there would be more of them, but Shikamaru was distracted at the sight of Haku – who had just dashed into the tunnel and was slightly out of breath.

"You're late," Shikamaru replied dryly as Haku blushed and squeezed himself beside the other man.

"Sorry," came the breathless reply. He craned his neck to look toward the arena...and then turned back into the tunnel. "Just in time though."

Shikamaru nodded and then felt his stomach drop a little as he heard the undeniable sounds of the guards ordering the sinners to begin their march to the outside. He closed his eyes and muttered a quick prayer.

It was now or never.

The ball was now squarely in Uzumaki Naruto's court.

* * *

><p><em>Naruto:<em>

_The least they could do was give us something to eat._

So it wasn't exactly the sort of the thing I ought to be thinking about considering the gravity of the day, but all things considered it really would have been nice to at least have a drink of water if nothing else. Foolishly, I had finished the rice ball and tea Captain Hard Ass had delivered last night, and this morning, my stomach was growling all sorts of weird noises that would have been embarrassing if I really gave a damn. I guess I could have rationed the thing, but how was I to know they wouldn't give us nourishment on our last day on earth? It didn't seem fair and it would be a big disadvantage to those of us who couldn't function on a full or semi-full stomach. I was beginning to feel faint already.

"Get moving!" came the snarl as I was dragged unceremoniously to my feet and shoved into the room where we were apparently being prepared for Gudan.

It was already cold down here in the dungeons, but as the guards ordered us to strip out of our loin cloths, I could already hear the mumbles and grumbles of complaints from my fellow sinners. I shivered as I stood in my birthday suit; not even bothering to protect the crown jewels, though I rubbed my arms to try to get some warmth into them. I even took the opportunity to size up my opponents and felt a little heartened at the state of some of them. For one thing, some looked older than me, and I made a mental note to use the needles on those who looked like they were close to death anyway.

There was this old dude – well not really that old – but he was mumbling and sniffling and crying and saying something about his "Aya-chan and Seisuke-chan" and how he would miss them, and I figured those were his kids. I would go for him first...take him out and hopefully he'd be revived and make his escape. The next I'd go for would be the guy who looked like he was stoned. His jaw was slack, his gray eyes glazed and unfocused. He had a nice face; you know...the kind that didn't look like they could hurt a fly. I didn't know what his deal was, or why he was set for death, but I'm sure after spending these past four months underground...all thoughts of doing anything bad ever again would have been erased. Yep. I would give him a chance for a new life by using the needle on him too.

As I went down the line, I realized that I was just about ready to give every damn person a 'needle', but had to wonder just how realistic that would be. For starters, I didn't know how many Haku would even give me, and secondly, hadn't Asuma told me that these guys would want to take each other out first when they realized that they were to fight each other to the death? I couldn't make it too obvious that I had a secret weapon. I'd have to at least put up a decent fight to make it seem like I was giving it my all.

Secret weapon aside, there was another advantage I had, which was that most of these guys looked so thin and frail, it wasn't fair to have them thrust into a battle like this. They had been locked up below ground for so long; it would be a miracle if being outdoors alone wouldn't kill them immediately. Their skins looked pasty and I could see a few ribs sticking out like sore thumbs. It was like having to fight walking corpses; a realization that was beginning to make me feel depressed as hell...at least until I met the amused dark eyes of the tall guy with the slicked back hair. How I failed to notice him before this was beyond me, but there he was. Looking for all the world like he had just strolled into a candy store and given his choice of tasty desserts to feast on. He had this snotty attitude that was beginning to rub me the wrong way; a kind of 'I'm-better-than-you-peons' attitude that reminded me of Sasuke. There was a deep gash on his left shoulder that looked pretty disgusting and fresh, which made me wonder just when the hell he had gotten that wound? Had he tried to escape? Did the guards do that to him? Didn't matter though, the guy didn't look as if he was in any pain neither did he look as frail and hungry as the others. If anything, he looked ready to go, something he was quick to emphasize as he blatantly eyed me and then licked his lips as if seeing something he liked. My skin crawled and I gritted my teeth. This guy was dangerous with a capital 'D'. I was most definitely not sparing a needle on him, but I'd have to do my best to steer clear of him early. He could prove to be a pain to get rid of.

"Step forward!" came the loud order that galvanized us to move again.

We all dutifully shuffled forward, only to fight back yelps of surprise or pain as we were suddenly doused with water so fucking cold, it set into my bones and had me stumbling to my knees. The shock took my breath away and I actually had to force myself to remember to suck oxygen into my lungs to get them functioning again. We coughed and sputtered like drowned dogs, and just when we assumed the torture was over, we were doused again as the sadists began chanting "Gudan" beneath their breaths.

_Fuckers. _

Thankfully this only happened three times before we were shuffled (more like dragged, since some of us fainted) out of the cleansing room and into another where we were outfitted in the same drab yukata we were introduced to when we first arrived. For underwear, we were made to wear the same freakin' loin cloth thing we had on last night, only it was tightened so we would spare the masses the sight of our dicks and balls flailing all over the place. How nice of them. I hated the damn thing and it made moving a little awkward. As if that wasn't bad enough, we were not allowed to wear sandals or even socks, and as our hands were tied behind our backs with crude burlap ropes that dug into our skins, I (reluctantly) began to feel the first twinges of panic fill my stomach.

"Everyone secure?" the head officer asked as about ten of the uniformed watchdogs appeared from out of nowhere. Damn. You'd think we were planning to escape with the way they were treating us.

"Let's head out!"

_Head out._ I'd laugh at the irony of the term, but I was too busy trying to remember everything Asuma and Shikamaru had taught me. It didn't make sense that they'd teach me how to fight with a sword when it didn't seem like anyone was giving us any weapon to fight with. Did they expect us to use our fists? It had been a while since I'd gotten into a fist-a-cuff with anyone, but I flexed my fingers as best I could; wondering if they were strong enough to cause any real damage to anyone's face.

Especially Mr. Smug Face up there.

He was at the front of the line and unlike the other sinners who had their heads down in misery; his was held high as if he was being led to a party and not his death. Even some of the officers seemed a bit surprised (or pissed) at his attitude.

Either way, thoughts of Smug Face or his behavior were wiped out as we began to hear the dull throb of the drums beating rhythmically and the subsequent cheers from what was no doubt...people. Jesus fucking Christ! It sounded like there were a million folks out there! It made the butterflies in my stomach flutter even harder, and I swallowed tightly as I felt a cold sweat break out on my brow. The march was getting a little steeper, a clear sign we were rapidly approaching the entrance to our doom. The drum beats were now louder; the cheers more rapturous. I tried to even my breathing, to think of good things...happy things...and yet, the closer we got, the more anxious I became. I was so tense...so focused on what was ahead; I failed to see the familiar faces of my friends until it was almost too late.

Fortunately, the officer in the lead finally yelled for us to stop, which was when Haku stepped out to begin his job of rubbing some oil like substance on our foreheads. I held my breath as he approached. This was too risky. This was too fucking dangerous. There were too many officers around us. They would discover him trying to slip the needles to me. They would catch us in the act. They would know and then not only would I be in trouble, but Haku could be in some serious trouble too. Who knew what they'd do to him after I'm gone? I was almost this close to shaking my head and telling him to forget the whole thing, when at that same exact moment, Shikamaru did something to cause a little distraction. He gave a loud curse and seemed to motion at something on the ground, which had everyone looking for what was the cause for his distress. It was more than enough time for Haku, for in what seemed like one fluid motion, he managed to rub the oil on my forehead and slip the small pouch into the 'pocket' made where the sash of my yukata met to keep it in place. He managed to give me a small smile before moving to the next sinner, and I felt I could breathe again, but not before giving Shika a grateful nod while he was being lectured by the head officer for being such a pussy at a little spider of all things.

"...time has come for those who wish to fill the earth with their sullied evil to face the consequences of their actions!"

Snake Dude was in full force this morning, wasn't he? His voice seemed to boom everywhere, and even if he said 'eh', the crowd would scream and yell as if he had given them all cash to squander or something. I couldn't really make out the arena from here, but if the sound was any indication, it was going to be one impressive place that's for sure.

"And now...we present to you, those whose very presence should make you all lucky you are not in their positions. Bring out the sinners!"

_That's our cue! It's show time, folks!_

I straightened up and squared my shoulders. Hell, if Smug Face was going to walk out there like he owned the place, I might as well do the same. What was the point of going out there with a defeatist attitude? If I already gave that impression, then I might as well tell the whole world that I was ready to accept my fate whatever that might be. I might have done something bad, but I had a reason to, and any one of those assholes screaming out there might have done the same thing if they were in my shoes. I had nothing to be ashamed of. I'd kill a million Kojimas all over again if they threatened the ones I loved.

The chants and boos began almost as soon as we stepped foot into the arena. While some showed their displeasure with their boos, others chanted "Gudan! Gudan! Gudan!" and stamped their feet in unison. I felt something hard thrown at my head, but ignored it as best I could, more interested in appraising my surroundings than dealing with a bunch of overzealous zombies.

The place was fucking HUGE.

Think of a baseball stadium, but without the diamond in the middle. Every fucking seat in the house was occupied and as I squinted and blinked my way through the shit being thrown at us, I realized that the middle of the stadium was kinda..._weird_. For one thing, there was a huge circular moat around the main ring, and it was clear we'd have to cross a wobbling wooden bridge to get to it. Well, actually there were four bridges connected to the main stage, which was designed to look like a caged dome. However, this was no ordinary moat, for instead of clear water, it looked murky and oily; giving one the impression that if you fell in it, you would probably die from just inhaling a drop of whatever the fuck it was. What were they planning to do? Throw all the dead bodies in there? Wouldn't that defeat the purpose of using the needles and reviving those who were taken away?

"KILL THEM ALL! KILL THE SINNERS!" Some folks bellowed enthusiastically.

_Well fuck you too, assholes. Like you're any better than me. _

We were marched across the bridge, which I swear kept wobbling so bad with every step, it was a goddamn miracle none of us fell into the oily sludge. Another guard was waiting at the end of the trip and he opened the dome with a rattle of keys where we were all pushed into roughly and our ropes eventually untied. Almost immediately, one idiot tried to escape, but he was shoved back much to the amusement of the crowd who boo'd again as the poor guy huddled in a corner and cried like a baby.

God. This was turning out to be a disaster before its even started.

"Welcome to your final day on earth, sinners!"

We looked up and toward the highest section of the stadium where a bunch of important-looking people sat observing the proceedings with acute interest. Snake Dude was the one who had greeted us, and it didn't take a rocket scientist to know that the guy was clearly enjoying himself. I noticed the white-haired guy with the dot on his forehead was with him too, but where was pretty boy First Captain Extraordinaire? He wasn't among the V.; neither did a quick survey of the ground/lower sections reveal anything. Hmm. Maybe he couldn't stomach it after all, though I tried to ignore the small part of me that was a little disappointed. I did want to at least show him my new and improved fighting skills if nothing else.

And that dream...what the fuck did that mean anyway?

_/It is finally our time.../_

"Whatever," I muttered beneath my breath and focused my attention (or at least tried to) on what Snake Dude was saying.

"...for it is only fitting that sinners who deem themselves worthy of forgiveness must seek that forgiveness the best way they know how."

_Talks too fucking much..._

"...and hence, you must face your worst fears by confronting each other in the tradition of old." He paused for effect, before finally announcing it. "A battle to the death!"

The collective gasp from the crowd and even some of the sinners (oh that's right...they wouldn't know about this, would they?) had me struggling to hide my smile. Not surprisingly, everyone began to murmur and talk at once. You could literally taste the confusion in the air...and the growing panic in the cage. Some of the prisoners looked absolutely stricken and began to yell and shake at the steel bars. This hadn't been the plan! They were supposed to be beheaded and that's it! What was all this talk about 'battling to the death'?

"Present their weapons!"

Guards marched from the four bridges to converge before the dome and before we could brace ourselves, they tossed in swords, and what looked like machetes, through the grilles before stepping back. At first, none of us moved as we stared at each other (and the weapons) in bemusement, but when Smug Face reached out for the longest katana in the bunch, the rest of us dove in to grab whatever we could. My fingers sought and found a katana as well, which was a good thing because we realized that there wasn't enough to go around. About five people ended up not getting anything, and with the guards walking away...it was clear that it had been planned that way.

Man! Talk about being cruel and unjust.

"As the Great Book says," Snake Dude rang out with a raise of his arms. "Fight until the blood runs down your veins. Fight until your body is cleansed of its impurities and the last one standing...he who conquers all...shall find and regain his freedom! Let the ritual of Gudan...BEGIN!"

Another rousing and near deafening cheer went up amidst chants of "Gudan! Gudan! Gudan! Gudan!" and yet neither of us in the cage could move. We all wanted to live and yet no one wanted to die or be the first to strike either. There was fear in their eyes, but as each heavy second ticked by, and the chants grew more frenzied, the fear was slowly being replaced by a crazed madness and clear desperation. No one wanted to die, but by God, they were going to fight through this even if it killed them.

And one guy did just that. It was the idiot who had tried to escape earlier. He had grabbed a machete and with a wild cry, dashed towards the weakest one of the bunch, who was without a weapon of his own. I pressed myself against the cage and waited for it, when the guy was suddenly stopped halfway as someone else's katana had pierced straight through his heart.

It was Smug Face! I hadn't even noticed the guy move, and as he withdrew his sword; now coated thick with the poor guy's blood, we all watched the body slump to the dusty ground face down. The crowd seemed to fall silent for a second at this sudden development, before erupting in a loud cheer of approval. Smug Face was rapidly becoming their hero.

Another loud cry was heard and as sinners began to dash towards each other wildly, I did my best to remain unnoticed...which was pretty much impossible because for one thing, the cage wasn't all that big and you could only run and dodge for so far before you were caught. I cringed as hot blood splattered on me; feeling pretty damn useless as the bodies went by too fast and chaotic for me to figure out who was who or who I could use the needle on.

I swung wildly, just in time to prevent a machete from chopping off my head. The clash of the steel blades gave off a faint spark and as I looked up to see my opponent, it was the dude who had been calling out his kids name back in the dungeon. There was pure insanity in his eyes now, and as I fought/pushed him back with one hand, I tried desperately to reach into my yukata to pull out a needle.

_Don't prick yourself. Don't prick yourself. Do not fucking prick yourself, Uzumaki Naruto._

Bless, Haku. He had made it easy enough for me to unroll the pouch, and as I chose a needle as carefully as I could (mind you, I was still parrying with the guy and trying not to get my ass killed), I finally managed to secure one, which I quickly thrust into his wrist before stabbing him in the upper thigh with my katana. It wasn't deep enough to cause him to die (I hoped), but him suddenly falling over so quickly, had me panicking a little. Haku hadn't been kidding. This thing worked like a charm. The illusion would be that my wound to the thigh had killed him, but I would have little to no time to admire this feat when I was attacked again by another guy.

This one seemed to know what he was doing, and he was able to dodge my attacks though I really wasn't planning to hurt him that badly. I finally managed to find an opening and stuck a needle at the back of his neck sending him to the ground with the growing number of bodies around us. Speaking of us...

_Holy shit._

What the hell happened while I was so busy with my need to save folks? It looked like hell in here. Not just at the fact that there were dead (and not so dead) bodies all over the place, but that some of them had actually been...been..._beheaded!_

I covered my mouth to control the almost immediate surge of vomit that rose to my throat, and I didn't need to look around to see who was responsible for this. Smug Face was standing tall and looking like the Prince of Death himself. From head to toe, he was bathed in blood; his katana barely distinguishable from his hand now. His eyes were frenzied with an excitement that was worrisome and though you couldn't tell if he had been injured or not, it didn't matter anyway. The dude was positively enjoying himself. He tossed away the head he had just severed off and I felt my stomach drop in disbelief and misery as I realized it was the very same guy I had pricked with the needle earlier. Smug Face was going about beheading everyone who was already dead! He was leaving nothing to chance. Was he really working for Snake Dude then? Was he some decoy sent in to make sure that no foul play was involved? It would explain why he was able to walk and look like he had no fear. They had sent him as the executioner in place of Sasuke! Those lying, conniving sons-of-bitches! A quick glance up at Snake Dude proved my theory. The pale-skinned guy looked like he was this close to having some kind of weird orgasm. He was enjoying this as much as Smug Face was.

"Help me!" came the desperate cry before it was silenced as the blade effortlessly sliced through the sinner's neck. I held back my cry of horror, my fingers tightening around the handle of my katana that was barely touched with blood. There were two other sinners left – besides me – and they too seemed to realize they were left in here with a mad man. They abandoned all hopes of trying to fight for themselves and tried to claw at the cage to make their escape; crying and sobbing like children as they begged for mercy.

_What is this?_

Smug Face laughed and tapped his katana against his thigh as he approached the duo.

_What is the meaning of this? _

He was mocking them. Toying with them.

_Why is this happening?_

He towered over them as they fell to their knees and begged for forgiveness.

_Why...? Why the fuck are people this...evil?_

I couldn't tell you when I moved, considering there was a line of dead bodies between me and the others, but I did and I didn't allow myself to think twice about what I was doing as I plunged the katana into Smug Face's back with every strength I had left. I honestly thought I had done some serious damage; that I had at least hit a vital point and this guy would be finished once and for all, but to my shock, he only seemed to stare at the protruding end of my katana from his stomach as if seeing such a thing for the first time in his life. To my chagrin, he broke into a grin as he turned a little to look at me.

"I hadn't forgotten about you," he drawled lazily. What the fuck was wrong with this guy? Wasn't he supposed to be dying? "As soon as I'm done with them...I will take great pleasure in killing you."

My scream of horror was overshadowed by the chants from the spectators as he swung his sword and took off the heads of the men before him cleanly. Such brute strength was unseen and unheard of, and as I staggered away on legs that shook with fear, I knew I had not only failed, but I was going to die in here.

_This crazy bastard was going to be the death of me, and I could do absolutely nothing in return. _

He took a deep breath; seemed to suck in a lot of air and then reached behind him to yank out my useless katana. He eyed the weapon, with distaste, before dropping it to the ground. Still ignoring me, he lowered a sleeve of his yukata to reveal his blood-streaked shoulder and arm. He began to draw weird markings on his face and body with his blood, all the while muttering something beneath his breath. The crowd was beginning to grow restless and they were now screaming for me to do something instead of being such a goddamn coward.

I wanted to tell them all to shut the fuck up. They had not faced with death in the eye before, and just like it was with Kojima, I found myself freezing up with a fear so deep, I was finding it a little hard to breathe. He was now moving the bodies aside to make more room ...but only to draw a weird anagram of a circle with a triangle in the middle on the ground with yes...more blood from the bodies he had decapitated. Boos now echoed around the stadium as Smug Face lifted his arms and began to pray or chant or whatever and I realized this would be a good a time as any to make my move...

(if my damn legs would cooperate)

All I had to do was prick him with a needle and then chop off his head like he's done with all the others. It would be perfect. I took a deep breath and began to move slowly; keeping my gaze firmly on him as he continued his prayers with his eyes closed. I had to step on or around bodies and finally found a katana that I could work with. I slid slowly to my haunches to pick it up, and just as my fingers wrapped around it, I felt the wind promptly knocked out of sails and my body (literally) flying across the ring to slam painfully against the steel cage.

_Jesus fucking Christ! What the hell...?_

"Urgh!"

Strong fingers clutched a fistful of my hair from the roots and dragged me up to my knees. My eyes watered with pain, but I refused to release my grip on the katana. I looked into the deranged dark eyes and watched his lips curve into a sneer.

"Your blood," he drawled. "Smells and tastes powerful enough to complete the circle."

"Up...yours..." I grunted and spat in his face.

The immediate blow to my stomach had me vomiting out my meager dinner from last night and blood at the same time. I sank to the floor and would have passed out, but I was dragged up again by my hair to face him.

_Fuck. Fuck. Fuck!_ This was too much to deal with.

He struck me again and I think I heard a few bones cracking. Like nothing more than a rag doll, I was flung aside; left to burrow my shame and agony against the still warm bodies of my fellow sinners. I made the mistake of looking up; to see if Snake Dude was having the time of his life with my suffering, but it was Haku's tear-streaked face I saw instead. He was standing beside Shikamaru – who looked expressionless – and mouthing (yelling) something at me that my muddled mind could not comprehend.

_What are you saying? Why are you shouting? I can't do anything anymore, Haku. I'm sorry. This plan was not going to work in the first place. I am not fit to live anyway. I can't do this anymore. I just can't. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sor – _

**Get up, Uzumaki Naruto. **

_Huh? What...what was that? _

Call it telepathy or ESP or whatever it is they call it these days, but I swear to you that I really did hear that hard ass's voice fill my head. I didn't understand it. Why the fuck was he speaking to me (if it was him and not just my mind playing tricks on me), and secondly...why was I even thinking about him _now_ of all times?

And yet, I found myself searching through the throng of endless bodies and faceless faces; looking...seeking...and eventually finding the bane of my existence. He wasn't among the V., much to my surprise, but he was surrounded by officers all the same. With arms folded across his chest and his features about as giving as a brick wall, there was no mistaking First Captain Uchiha Sasuke or the fact that he was obviously staring right back at me. I couldn't tell if he was pissed off or just didn't give a shit. Either way, there was no way he could have said anything to me because his lips were tightened...and _still_ I heard him again.

_Get the fuck up, you worthless sinner and finish what you started!_

_How eloquent, you piece of shit,_ I thought, though I still found myself closing my eyes and chuckling a little. How ironic that it would have to be his 'voice' to set those flames of rebellion within me again. I tightened my grip on the katana and lifted my lashes.

_You're right. This is no time to feel sorry for myself. I came all this way, and I'm not going down with a fucking fight._

I sensed Smug Face coming up behind me, and biting my lip to control the grimace of pain as I moved, I spun around and rolled aside just as his katana plunged itself into the already dead body I had been lying on. I rose to a knee and remembering what Asuma taught me, slashed hard towards Smug Face's thigh; sending him toppling to the ground in surprise. His blood – hot and metallic – drenched me as I withdrew and struck again, this time finding an area at the back of his leg. He growled in fury and swung with his sword. It would have taken me out, but I leapt out of the way just in time and got a nick around my jaw for my effort.

He rose to his feet in a manner that did not betray he had almost gotten a leg sliced off. I swear this guy must be made out of iron or something.

"You sure don't know how to die, do you?" I panted in disbelief as I braced myself and held out my katana in preparation.

Smug Face smiled; a gruesome sight considering all the weird markings and blood on him. "That is because I am immortal."

"Eh?" I raised a brow in disbelief. What the fuck is he high on?

"Jashin," he explained with a smirk. "My clueless one. Through the merciful powers of Lord Jashin, I have been given the power of immortality! So no matter how many times you slice and dice me...I simply will not die."

_Fantastic._ If what this psycho was saying is true, then how the hell was one supposed to kill him? Would the fucking needle even work?

"DIE IN THE NAME OF LORD JASHIN!" He suddenly roared and with a maniacal laugh, he dove for me with both a machete and katana in hand.

_Whoa!_ I ducked, tripped over a body and had to practically roll aside as he kept slashing at the already dead humans around us. I know how this looks, but that's exactly what kept happening. He was mutilating the poor guys (limbs and pieces of flesh now flying around) and the ground was now so slippery with blood, I could hardly walk (or run in this case). They could at least stop the fight and get them out of here, couldn't they?

"Fuck!" I barely held out my katana to block the weapons coming at me, but it gave me enough time to strike out with my left leg; sending him back long enough for me to dig into my yukata for another needle...

_Wait...what...? Where was the pouch? Oh no! What...!_

To my horror, I realized it must have probably rolled out when I was dodging earlier, and a desperate glance around the den of hell revealed nothing. That thing had been so small, it was almost hard to make out in this mess. Smug Face was heading for me again, and in my panicked attempt to dodge, I slipped on a pool of blood and nearly took myself out as I fell and struck my head against the cage. Smug Face came hollering and screaming at me, and I was only able to slide a little lower just in time to prevent the machete from taking off my head. The idiot had swung so hard, the weapon was now stuck within the steel grille and wouldn't budge. Did that stop the fucker? You bet it didn't.

He struck with his katana, which I was able to block in time before I found my free wrist suddenly captured and twisted so hard, the world blacked out for a second. He head-butted me away and I slumped down to the ground; the surge of adrenaline I had felt earlier vanishing just as rapidly as it came.

Aww hell...I'm aching and hurting all over.

I could barely move or lift an arm, and I realized that if this was the price for freedom, I wanted out...and fast. It just wasn't worth being abused like this.

"Are you prepared to meet your beautiful death, Oh Scarred One?"

I lifted heavy lashes to look up at the towering figure above me. Beautiful death, eh? It would have been beautiful if I had my girl with me, but hey...

/The bottom line is that Kendo relies mostly on mental strength. It is the ability to think fast on your feet and to think two, three, five steps ahead of your opponent. It's all well and good to swing a sword around, but you must keep your mind sharp and think of tactics to throw him off guard. Sometimes the quickest way to win a fight is to be unorthodox. Do something your opponent least expects, and when you have an opening or have him at your mercy…you must strike immediately!/

_Thank you...Asuma-sensei._

I watched the glint of the blood-stained katana as it hovered over me; his intentions to plunge it right into my heart. However, if my calculations were right, and if I moved fast enough...

"Die for the glory of Lord Jashin!"

_As if, you bastard._

It all happened so damn fast, I wouldn't have the time to admire the feat until long after. He plunged, I rolled away, but only to reach up to tug hard on the sash of his yukata. What did this move do? It made it easy for me to spin him around and toward the direction of the machete that still sat lodged and waiting for just the perfect head to decapitate. It had to be timed and angled properly, and I really wasn't expecting it to work at all. It had been a wild hunch...a whim if you will, but damn if it didn't go as planned. Smug Face would only have enough time to open his mouth in a soundless scream before his head was sent flying through the air before landing amongst the pile he had accumulated earlier.

I know. Pretty fucking anti-climatic, but that was it. Just like that...it was all over.

As his big body eventually slumped to the ground, my knees finally gave way and I sunk in weariness and incredulity at what had just taken place. In fact, I fully expected his body to get up again and for his headless corpse to finish off what it started while his head laughed and mocked me for being so stupid and careless. Immortality meant he couldn't die, so what was the point of this little tactic?

And still...as I trembled and waited for the inevitable; to hear that mocking laughter or to see that damned katana rise again, all I could hear was the thunderous cheer of the spectators, seeping through my highly strung yet dulled senses. It was a painful reminder that all this time, we had really been fighting for the enjoyment and pleasure of blood-thirsty morons. I looked up and blinked slowly. I couldn't make out what they were chanting, but it certainly didn't seem like "Gudan! Gudan! Gudan!" anymore.

Was this it then? Was I finally going to be set free?

Feeling a light sensation begin to flutter within my heart and stomach, I half staggered and stumbled to my feet to clutch the steel cage with eagerness. I looked toward Snake Dude's section, wishing there was a way I could scream and make him hear me. Our eyes did meet, and what I saw...I didn't really like. I couldn't explain it to you if I tried. There was that expression of pleasure and yet a darkness that bothered me. I forced my gaze away and tried to find Haku and Shikamaru. Haku was applauding and even Shika...but I got the feeling he was still worried about something. What? Couldn't he be happy for me? I had survived the battle, hadn't I? Was he just jealous that he would still be stuck in here while I was finally out? Although when I remember his words of me winning and getting out of here...it just didn't seem to fit. I noticed him glancing to a place on his left, and as I followed his gaze, I finally saw Asuma within the throng of officers. He too was looking at me, but there was only a small smile on his visage and not a ginormous one given to a person who was really happy the fiasco was over.

_Something...something's not right..._

I could feel it now, and my palms got sweatier as I darted a panicked glance to search for the final face (of approval?). But to my chagrin, he was no longer in the vicinity. The officers were still there, but Sasuke was gone.

Fair enough. He had probably seen all he needed to see and would now -

"Well done, Sinner!" came the booming voice of Snake Dude that was followed by another cheer from the crowd. I could hear the loud groan of the steel cage doors being opened, from all four sides, and the sinners on duty (about fifty of them) ushered in to begin carrying out the bodies and cleaning up the mess quickly. I honestly thought about slipping out with them, but didn't want to get in the way of their cleaning, besides...I'd be released soon anyway, so what was the rush?

"You have far exceeded our expectations!" Orochimaru continued with a wide smile on his features. "Your strength and courage has shown that you are most deserving of your freedom, and you shall have it for our god is most merciful!"

I smiled and closed my eyes as a huge rush of relief overwhelmed me. Freedom. At last. Never had a word sounded so beautiful to me. Technically, I could leave this place with my head held high because I had only actually killed one person, and that person was a psycho who did deserve to get his ass butchered, but otherwise, I was still relatively clean, which was good. All I had to do was find the next bus that would take me to Kyoto first thing in the morning and then –

"...trials and tribulations to overcome."

Huh? What the hell is he still talking about?

I lifted my lashes and had to step aside as water was being hosed to rinse away the blood that had accumulated. I watched with slight revulsion as the 'debris' of chopped fingers and entrails pooled into the oily moat.

"...for the Great Book says..."

I swear if I find this so-called Great Book, I am going to burn that fucking thing.

"...the heart and body can only be truly free after the final battle."

_Final...battle?_

I heard the loud clang of the steel doors being shut again, and I spun around in panic; eyes widening as I watched the guards walk away, leaving me all alone in the now clean (well as clean as it could be considering there were still streaks of blood everywhere) cage.

"What..." I began with a lick of my dry lips. "What the hell is going on?"

I spun back to face Snake Dude and screamed at the top of my lungs. "What the hell is going on?" I shook the cage angrily. "I'm supposed to be free, aren't I? You promised I'd go free if I was the last one standing, you fucker!"

I didn't really think he'd hear me considering the crowd was still delirious with their need for more blood shed, but apparently he did.

"Oh? But you aren't the last one standing, Uzumaki Naruto," Orochimaru replied with a sneer. He even knows my name! "You have one more opponent to overcome."

WHAT? One more opponent to overcome? Why did I have to go through all this again? And who the hell was I going to have to face now?

As the loud clang of the steel door opened again behind me, I turned with an angry scowl to confront the bastard unfortunate to deal with me in my current state of mind. I was too pissed off to think straight, and all I could think about was picking up my katana and stabbing the asshole once and for all (or chopping off his head if he turned out to be another immortal) to end this farce. At the back of my mind I guess I knew things weren't going to be this easy, and perhaps that was why Shikamaru and Asuma hadn't been so thrilled either.

_They knew,_ I thought bitterly. _They both knew I would have to face one more person and they didn't tell me so I wouldn't get my hopes up. So much faith you two had in me, huh? Well fuck you two as well._

I reached for my sword and held it before me. I still couldn't make out who my new opponent was, because he was proceeded by four officers, who eventually stepped aside to let him through.

The effect of being sucker-punched in the nether regions was fucking intense.

_I don't...I don't fucking believe it._

I wanted to laugh, but I had a feeling it would be of the maniacal, hysterical kind. Of course. Of course it would have to be _him_. Who else? Call it poetic justice that I'd have to face the man responsible for sending me here in the first place. God...or Snake Dude really did have a wicked sense of humor. I shook my head and lowered the katana a little before turning to glance at Snake Dude and his cronies. They all looked riveted, hell even the crowd had gasped in surprise at this sudden turn in development, and who could blame them. The star of the show had finally arrived; the one destined to show them how Gudan was truly performed. Did they really think I had no choice? It was clear I was at the disadvantage. I was tired and considerably weakened from the skirmish earlier, so this had all been set up as a no-win situation for yours truly.

There had really been no intention of me getting out of here in the first place, and that knowledge set the fires of fury literally burning me up.

I turned back to face him and allowed a bitter smile to come to my face.

"Sorry, I couldn't clean up a little better for you," I said calmly. "Just been put through a useless fight and had to take out a few people...if you know what I mean."

He said nothing, simply waiting for the door to the cage to be closed again before slowly unsheathing the katana. I had to admit it looked pretty damn impressive, though my admiration was cut short as he fell into his stance; presenting that somewhat intimidating persona again. Maybe it was the white top he was wearing; the fact that it seemed to fucking glow amidst the carnage that had just taken place earlier. Whatever it was, his aura this time around was far different than the one I had experienced in the dojo. While that Sasuke had looked bleary-eyed and pissed at the world, this one just didn't seem to give a fuck who he was facing. In fact, I had the feeling he wasn't even seeing _me_ at all! Why that knowledge added to my already raging fury, I had no idea.

But no matter.

I'd make him fucking see me if it was the last thing I did. I'd make him acknowledge that I fucking exist, and if it meant killing him to accomplish that...then so be it.

One of us had to die today, and it sure as hell wasn't going to be me.


	15. 15: Gudan II

**Notes:** Thanks to my 'peeps': lonelylulaby, bridmatt, kiashi, silversauce, madstrawberry, opalynne, through_darkness_and_light, xxotheralicexx! XD I really do appreciate your feedback/thoughts on the previous chapters, and I'm especially impressed by those of you who say you're non-English speakers, and yet are still able to take the time to leave a kind word or two! *bows gratefully* How cool is that? To those who are still wondering who the 'other Uchiha is'...I thought I had already mentioned his name in a previous chapter? *LOL* I am getting some really weird/random suggestions as to who the other person might be, so go back and refresh your memory. Also, to those who felt the fight was 'too short'...it was, and not because I was simply too lazy to get into details, but fights in such a frenzied situation aren't going to drag on and on and on, are they? This isn't going to be like DBZ where Goku took like ten thousand freakin' episodes just to get one measly spirit bomb completed. The action is fast and furious and I hoped to capture that intensity with the last chapter. =/ Either way, fighting scenes had never really been my forte as seeing it in my head is one thing and actually writing the words out to convey exactly what happens to the readers is another. So if you are all able to picture it well as you read, that is more than enough for me. *crosses fingers*

Anyhoo, enough rambling! Hope you enjoy the chapter, and put on some action, dramatic music in the background while reading. I know I had one (Audiomachine rocks!) while writing out some scenes *lol* Enjoy!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 15: <strong>

**Gudan (II)**

_It is by its breath  
>That autumn's leaves of trees and grass<br>Are wasted and driven.  
>So they call this mountain wind<br>The wild one, the destroyer._

_**Fun'ya no Yasuhide**_

* * *

><p>"Insanity."<p>

Itachi remained silent to the muttered word of disgust from his companion. His expression gave nothing away; though his feelings did mirror the expressed sentiment. This was indeed insanity at its highest level. Revulsion at Hidan's merciless killings were enough to curdle one's blood, and yet listening to the frenzied yells from the spectators (although there were those who had turned away from the brutal sight or left the arena completely) made his heart heavy with the fickle nature of men. So easily swayed and intoxicated with the notion of being witnesses to such hideous acts, they were willing to give up what little humanity they had left.

Still he had watched intently at the events as they unfurled; unaware that a small part of him had been rooting for the blond young man Asuma had mentioned as being Uzumaki Naruto. Throughout the bloodbath, Naruto had managed to keep his wits about him (for the most part), and though Itachi couldn't detect this for certain, he was sure Naruto had not set about inflicting deadly wounds on those he did end up battling. If it wasn't for Hidan's 'thoroughness', Itachi was sure most, if not all, of the prisoners would have been left limping or barely hanging on.

Was Asuma right after all? Would this wild child be merciful enough not to take his brother's life if given the opportunity? So what if his sword skills were not exactly the best despite whatever Asuma must have taught him? Itachi could still see a lot of potential. There was no doubt that with more training, Naruto could be one of the better sword fighters around. There was a natural fluidity (mostly offset by some clumsy moments) in the blond's movements that was to be envied.

However, thoughts of Naruto would have to take a backseat as a slight commotion on his left had him glancing in that direction. A group of officers had just arrived to the stadium and for the first time in weeks (months? Years?), Itachi felt his heart stir with a gamut of emotions he could not describe.

_Sasuke…_

It was his little brother and yet _not_ his little brother. It was difficult to explain how this contradiction fit into his thought processes; for though he had relied mostly on Asuma's descriptions and a few photographs, actually seeing the once barely-higher-than-my-knee boy he had left all those years ago; now older, taller, and hardly as 'cute' as he had once been – was almost a shock to the senses. Time and his experiences, under Orochimaru's care, had definitely taken their toll.

The Sasuke he had known always smiled in his presence; those dark eyes aglow with curiosity and a happiness that was sometimes contagious. He knew Sasuke had worshipped him unequivocally while they were boys; had known that Sasuke would always try to emulate him in all he did, and goodness knows Itachi had done his best to be the best 'big brother' he could possibly be. Sure there had been moments when he had thought Sasuke annoying and bothersome, especially when he'd throw temper tantrums and want things to go his way, but those were now simply memories that remained near and dear to his heart. He had (still) loved Sasuke unconditionally and would have done anything to keep that smile and innocence ingrained within him forever.

_If only…_

If only what? What could he do now to make up for all those years lost? Would their plan today be to the benefit of everyone? What if things went wrong? Would it all be for naught? He had no delusions that a reunion was going to be anything but 'happy', and Itachi was still on the fence about actually making his presence known when the time came. And yet looking at that face; seeing those dark eyes that were now inscrutable, the down turn of those lips that seemed as if the very act of smiling was going to be next to impossible, Itachi knew there was no way he could 'escape' this time around. He owed his brother an explanation…_many_ explanations in fact. It was the least he could do to atone for whatever sins he had committed.

"KILL! KILL! KILL! KILL! KILL!"

"FINISH HIM! FINISH HIM! FINISH HIM!"

The noise was at fever pitch now. Every attention attuned to the fight as it was now only Hidan and Naruto left within the caged dome. With an effort, Itachi tore his gaze from his brother to focus on the V.I.P section again. The warm feelings he had allowed to seep into his heart just moments earlier, evaporated just as quickly as they had appeared. His lips thinned with disgust as he watched Orochimaru and Danzo all but leaning over the balcony with acute interest. The lecherous grin of intent on the pale-skinned man's face made his stomach churn, and the hidden weapon within his robes suddenly seemed to weigh a ton as he made mental calculations of how many people were packed within the reserved section.

_Too many…too many damn guards. This is going to be tricky._

Orochimaru and Danzo weren't fools. He'd give them that much. Those old geezers would know that they were the targets of enemies at all times, so extra precautions would have to be taken. All the same, this was no time to focus too much on that. Itachi knew they had to get things moving _now._

"Shisui," he finally called out quietly without looking away from those he despised.

"Yes?"

"Give the signal."

Shisui gave a curt nod, and placing a two fingers within his mouth, he gave a barely audible whistle and made a motion with his fingers. Those in the crowd – strategically placed – 'heard' and saw the signal and began to make their move as discreetly as possible. It was easy to slip in and out of the stadium now without rousing suspicion, for even the guards and officers on duty were engrossed with the battle. They really couldn't be bothered with those who chose to leave due to the gruesome nature of the festivities.

In a way, it was almost too easy, and both men knew that sometimes it was the 'easiest' plans that always ended up being the most complicated.

Perhaps he need not have worried about his comrades being caught for the frenzy reached deafening heights as Hidan's head was severed in the most unconventional way. Even Shisui, who was rather had to impress, gave a low whistle of appreciation at the psychopath's quick and unexpected end. There were hardly any feelings of loss or regret for they too had heard of Hidan's escapades in the outside world. It was bad enough that the rumors had begun about him being a part of their organization; something that had Itachi shuddering at the notion. The last thing he needed was to be associated with a crazy bastard like Hidan, so it was with great relief that his capture was well publicized and now this befitting death. Served the asshole right.

Though neither man visibly applauded Naruto's valiant effort, they did have small smiles on their faces and felt a twinge of regret that his victory was only going to be short-lived. It was clear Orochimaru still had that one trick up his sleeve, and it was almost painful to watch Naruto's wail of despair and unbridled anger at being duped with a false sense of security.

"Bastard," Shisui growled beneath his breath. He glared coldly toward the V.I.P section. "I'll take great pleasure in watching him die."

"Asuma told us to expect this, didn't he?" Itachi replied quietly; though his gaze was now focused on the arrival of his brother to the dome. His stomach muscles clenched tight with anxiety; realizing how Orochimaru had set this up perfectly. Naruto was now going to be too furious to even contemplate the notion of forgiveness, for his only thoughts would be of freedom and of eliminating any obstacle in his path to achieving that.

Unfortunately, this 'obstacle' was turning out to be none other than his brother; the one person Itachi had vowed to protect for as long as he lived. So how the hell was he supposed to do that now with this scenario?

"I'm sure Sasuke will prevail," Shisui muttered as if noticing his companion's worries. "Didn't you brag about him being the best sword fighter this side of the country? Besides…"

He paused and looked up – as if toward the heavens – he sniffed once…twice…and allowed another smile to come to his features. "…looks like they've already started the party without us."

Itachi sniffed the air as well and then glanced at his watch. Perfect timing. He opened his mouth to say something else, but was immediately distracted by the uproar of approval from the crowd. It forced his attention back to the events happening within the dome; realizing with a growing sense of foreboding that if things did not go as planned, he could very well be watching his brother's inevitable dance with Death itself.

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke:<em>

_This is madness._

Try as hard as I could to detach myself from the massacre I had witnessed, it was inhumanly impossible to turn away from it as well. Like watching a train wreck of catastrophic proportions, seeing Hidan 'at work' had been enough to have me swallowing my repulsion and gritting my teeth. You might assume I should be used to this, since I have been a willing participant of such things in the past. However, Gudan had never been this…_raw_ and _tainted_.

Gudan had really been treated as a spiritual event, where sinners were simply marched up to the center of the arena, made to kneel before the large pit, prayed for and then sacrificed as cleanly as possible. We did not go about painting our faces with their blood and showcasing the severed heads like war trophies, and depending on the number of sinners due for Gudan, this was usually a quick and stress-free event. Everyone went home subdued or murmuring in thought.

_So much for that now._

I have never seen the crowd so worked up before; never seen them so eager to see more senseless bloodshed in the hands of the psychopath. This mass union of blood lust was mind-numbing, and a quick glance at Orochimaru proved just how much he and his cronies were enjoying and feeding off the frenzy. It was like a drug for him, I'm sure. I had never seen his features so flushed with near orgasmic bliss; neither had I seen him so taken by the sight of...who? Hidan or Naruto? If it was Hidan, I could understand his reason for being so excited. Hidan would have been the perfect henchman ... if he wasn't so damned insane. In fact, hadn't he claimed that he believed in what Orochimaru did? They would have made a perfect team...a probability that did cross my mind as sinner after sinner was being slaughtered until there was only one left.

_Uzumaki Naruto._

Unaware of how tight my fists were clenched as I watched the blue-eyed sinner fight, it would take me a while longer to realize I was _that_ tense during the melee. Naruto's fighting skills hadn't really improved much, or rather; I did notice he was much quicker on his feet than before. He had been able to dodge the wild attacks that came at him, and though he did cause some damage, I was quick to note that he had hit no real vital points in his victims. Hell, if it wasn't for Hidan lopping off heads like they were going out of style, I was sure Naruto had no intention of killing his opponents. Just what had he intended to do if Hidan hadn't beheaded them? Was Naruto really that naïve enough to believe Orochimaru would let him walk out freely without finishing the job? Either the blond was a complete fool or he really did...

_(he has a good heart...don't forget)_

I snorted in derision. _Let's see just how far that good heart of yours gets you, Uzumaki Naruto. Sometimes you have to be cruel to gain what you want. _

So _why_? Why did I not feel at ease as I watched him being beat up by that hedonistic sinner? Why was I not jumping in glee or smiling in victory as I assumed Hidan would finish him with a clean beheading? Why was my stomach in knots as I watched him go down in defeat; as I felt the willpower to fight seem to seep away from his aura? Where was that bravado that had dared me while I visited him in prison? Where was the determined man I had seen in the dojo? The one who wasn't afraid to speak his mind no matter the consequences. Where was the man who...?

_/"I vow to keep my promise to Naruto-kun! No matter what happens...I promise...I will take care of you until my dying breath!"_/

It was as if I had been goosed as I recalled Haku's impassioned and tearful words to me when I left this morning. I felt a chill run down my spine and yet a strange warmth fill my heart all at once. I did not understand what his words had meant at the time; or rather I had not allowed myself to fully comprehend them. However, it seemed to me that despite it all...that despite all the pain and suffering Uzumaki Naruto had gone through, he must have actually told Haku to _look after me_...to care for me. Why? Did he feel I needed to be babied or protected? Or did he really genuinely care for my welfare?

_No..._

_No one_ could be _that_ forgiving, so I assumed it was him being patronizing as usual and Haku probably reading it the wrong way. In fact, I was now sure that Naruto must have said it in jest; that the blond must have uttered the words in a sarcastic tone and Haku had believed him to be sincere. I felt a flicker of something, I refused to acknowledge as disappointment, within me and would have turned away from the fight to prepare for my inevitable opponent...when our eyes suddenly met and the world stood still.

I couldn't explain it to you any properly even if I tried, but I could honestly say that for those few miniscule moments, it really did feel and seem like we were the only two humans left in a void of emptiness. I could no longer hear the frenzied crowd. I could no longer smell the pungent stench of hot blood, human entrails, sweat and tears. In this void, there was no sound but the beating of our hearts; mine – slow and steady, his – rapid and slightly irregular.

Where the fuck were we? What was the meaning of this? What did he want from me? Why was he staring at me with such intensity? Was he waiting for me to say to him? Did he want some form of encouragement? Something to get him motivated? Did he really believe I'd be willing to say something..._anything_ to give him the strength he needed?

(yes...yes...yes...because...because...)

_He was mine._

Mine to kill. Mine to destroy. Mine to eliminate as had been destined from the moment we met. I held Uzumaki Naruto's fate in the palm of my hand, and we both knew it. How could I possibly allow that heathen to steal my inherent wish and desire? How could I allow Hidan to defeat him when we were yet to conclude the fight we began in the dojo? Naruto would have to find some strength from somewhere, get his butt off the ground, and finish what he had started. There was really no excuse for him to lose this way. None.

_Get the fuck up, you worthless sinner, and finish what you started!_

I know he couldn't hear me, for I was sure I had said this in my head and yet he... _smiled_. He actually _smiled_ as if he had **indeed** heard every damn word!

_How eloquent, you piece of shit. _

And now I was hearing voices in my head..._his_...**again**. I shook my head rapidly as if to rid myself of this odd and bewildering situation... and just like that, we were back to reality; a reality that was even more insane than before. Naruto was back on his feet, and as I watched him fight this time around; with more determination and vigor than he had shown moments earlier, I wondered if it really had anything to do with...well...whatever the hell had just transpired in 'the void'. I did not believe in telepathy, and always considered psychics or those who claimed to be 'seers' as quacks and weirdos. So where did this place me? Was I beginning to lose my mind? I have been having trouble sleeping lately, so maybe it had something to do with -

"Whoo...there he goes," came the commentary beside me that was quickly followed by a deafening roar of approval from the crowd.

Hidan was officially dead. Good riddance to bad rubbish.

It was my time now.

_Our time._

I spun on my heels to follow the officers, no longer needing to see the rest of the fight or what was to happen next. Though with the speakers and Orochimaru's voice booming everywhere, it wasn't hard to know that the news of Naruto's 'freedom' being on hold for one more fight was not taken very well by said Naruto.

I almost felt sorry for him. _Almost._

Still, it was just the right trigger to get the blond sinner all riled up, and the closer I approached the caged dome, the more I realized just how well Orochimaru had set this up. With Naruto now so furious about the situation, he would have no other choice but to go all out with me to gain his release. I took a second to glare coldly towards the V.I.P section; meeting Orochimaru's amused dark gaze before he tipped his cup, of whatever the hell he was drinking, in my direction as if giving a toast. I briefly contemplated throwing my sword in his direction and seeing how far it would go or if it would make a direct hit with his chest (or head), but I knew it was next to impossible in this situation, and besides...

(_too late_)

The grinding sound of the cage being locked behind me was the signal that any thought or plan of getting out of this situation prematurely was going to be next to impossible. Not that I had any plan of escaping in the first place. I had a job to do, and I was determined to do it as well as I could. I would have to clear my mind of all extraneous thoughts including any and all conversations I've had with the man...

(_no...not a man...do not see him as human_)

...this sinner before me. I would ignore the fact that in the few conversations we have had so far, he has been able to insult, ridicule, embarrass (he thought I was female for crying out loud!), and have me thinking of matters I would have rather not dealt with. His ability to rattle me easily was something I'd have to take into consideration. I was determined not to let him get to me. No matter what happened.

"Sorry," he began as if we were simply chatting. "I couldn't clean up a little better for you. Just been put through a useless fight and had to take out a few people...if you know what I mean."

The bitter smile on his lips made his appearance more animalistic, and with the brief flash of his teeth...primal. From head to toe, he was covered with spatters of dirt and blood and there was no way to distinguish which belonged to him or to the victims. If he was in pain, he gave no sign of it, though I was sure he was aching in several places thanks to Hidan's punishing blows earlier. He was also weary, that much I could tell with his breathing and slight unsteadiness in his stance. It almost didn't seem fair that I would have this much of an advantage over him. All I had to do was strike and this fight would be over before it even began. The least I could do was put on good performance for Orochimaru and Danzo; to show those bastards that for underestimating me, I was going to prove just what I was capable of.

_Pity you have to be my scapegoat, Naruto,_ I thought with a smile that had him raising a brow in wariness. _But here I come!_

I crouched a little and thrust the sword at an angle; the aim to take him by surprise from below and perhaps deliver a crushing blow to his thigh at least. However, and much to my surprise, my sword was quickly blocked as he shifted to his left (nearly slipping a little, thanks to the wet ground) and struck back hard enough to send me back a few steps.

_What the hell? Where is this strength coming from?_

I stepped back again and fell into a stance, noticing he was doing the same thing. However, unlike before when he had been careless at the dojo, there was now simply no opening at all. I had no idea where he learned to protect himself like this, but watching him now; his eyes dark and intent as he held out his sword before him, I realized I was dealing with someone different. This was not the same Naruto I had fought at the dojo. This Naruto – though mentally and emotionally spent (or wired) – was not going to make things easy for me.

Fair enough. I wouldn't go easy on him either.

We sized up each other; ignoring the impatient yells and screams from the crowd as they sought for us to go all out at once. And just when I felt it was safe to make the first move again, Naruto beat me to the punch with a sudden thrust that was barely blocked as I stepped to my right and held out the sword to prevent it from finding a home in my ribs. I pushed back with a grunt and planting my right foot firmly on the ground I swung back with the handle of the sword to finally make contact with his torso. He gasped in pain and leapt out of the way, only to return - just like a fucking boomerang - to swing at me again.

This time I watched in mild disbelief as tufts of my hair –closest to my forehead – fell to the ground like weightless feathers.

_The hell?_ I couldn't believe it. This guy had been this close to...to...!

"Better watch it," he taunted breathlessly. "Next time, I have no intention of missing."

Feeling a gamut of emotions - ranging from embarrassment to fury – overwhelm me, I struck again nearly connecting with this right foot; though – as before – he was quick to leap out of the way, but...

(_not fast enough_)

...I lifted the sword just as quickly; hardly giving him time to settle down before nearly taking off his left ear. Lucky for him, it seemed I had only managed to graze his temple, but it was enough to have him howling with pain and staggering away with a hand to the wound. I watched dispassionately as his blood flowed between his fingers and down his arm.

Heh. If looks could kill, I would probably be dead by now.

Not that I gave a shit.

I swung again, now seeking to finish this with a cut to his arm. However, I was definitely not expecting what happened next. There are strict rules against using hand-to-hand combat in _kenjustu,_ but I should have known that when it came to Uzumaki Naruto, all rules were thrown out the window. In a maneuver that no instructor would ever teach his student, the bastard had lifted an elbow to strike me hard on my jaw; so hard my mouth was immediately filled with blood and I just about felt all my teeth shift within their sockets. The next blow – this time a hard kick to my stomach - had me falling to the ground and the sword nearly slipping from my grasp.

_Fucking hell! _The pain was agonizing!

It has been a while since I've been in such a situation, and I can honestly tell you my body was screaming in protest at being 'maltreated' in such a manner. I likened it to probably being hit with a car moving at over 60 miles per hour, but what did I know? Even a spar with Kimimaro hadn't been this brutal. I spat out a wad of blood and was just fast enough to hold out my sword to block another incoming attack from Naruto.

Rules be damned, huh? Fine! If that's the way he wanted to do it.

I struck out with my foot; nearly missed kicking him in his private area (which would have been perfect), but ended up making direct contact with his already aching torso. His low cry of pain as he slammed hard against the cage was music to my ears. Rising to my feet quickly, I clutched my sword tightly within my sweat-slicked grip and dashed toward him to finish this off. The longer I stayed here; getting filthier and bloodier with each blow, the more I realized that I might be losing my edge.

Naruto's fighting skills had definitely improved and I had no idea how or why that was the case. He was able to detect my attacks even before I did them, and could block and dodge easily. It was frustrating; not just because of that, but because he wasn't doing it in the 'normal' way. I simply got the feeling he was going with instinct for the most part, and though he was clearly exhausted, he would not give me the opening I needed to finish him off.

"Tir...tired yet?" he panted as we pushed each other off and stepped away to catch our breaths. "Tho...thought you could take me out easily, didn't you?"

"You look dead on your feet," I panted back angrily, and he honestly did. His blond hair was no longer as shaggy as it used to be, thanks to the sweat that now made it limp and plastered to his bloodied forehead and cheeks. I had ripped several places in his yukata exposing more of his flesh to my gaze where some ugly bruises were already forming from where he had been struck or stabbed. How he could still stand was beyond my comprehension. It felt like he had an endless reserve of energy stored up within that lithe frame. It infuriated me. He was supposed to be down and out by now.

_Goddamnit! _

"Oh yeah? Well you look like shit too, Mister," came the sneer followed by him spitting as if in disgust. I knew I probably looked a sight. The bastard had managed to cut me in a few places as well. The sleeves of my _kamishimo_ were barely hanging on, and my hair lay damp upon my head and face. I don't think I've sweat this much in a while – well perhaps after practice at the dojo – and I hated to admit that a part of me felt...well..._excited_ about this.

Fucking _exhilarated._

This rush...this adrenaline...this surge of energy that came with being in a _real_ fight; in knowing that your life was on the line and that any blow to come next could be the last. I craved more of this. I wanted to continue this spine-tingling experience; to feel every nerve ending in my body on edge; ready to spring to life with this sinner as my opponent There was something equally sadistic and troubling about my desire to watch him bleed; to know that my sword had been stained with the thick, rich, fluid that I longed to lick off slowly before him. I cringed at this sinful and wicked thought and shook my head rapidly in disbelief.

I really had spent too much time with Orochimaru.

I watched his feet carefully; saw him move...prepared to block, but as before, he took me by surprise again. This time, he finally made contact with my flesh; a thrust to my left forearm that left a somewhat deep gash behind while he spun around fluidly. My world exploded in pain and the sword did nearly slip to the ground, but I wasn't ready to give up just like that. I leapt back to gather myself. I was the better swordsman in this situation. I could not forget years of training and teachings just to fall into this man's trap of fighting unconventionally.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath; wanting to block out the thunderous noises and to concentrate. I couldn't see him...but I could _sense_ him approach, and I did have to give him credit for not running up to me like a mad man, but I knew it would do him no good either. With a quick flick and twist of my wrist, I raised my sword above my head in a circular motion – waited for a heartbeat before swinging it parallel to my body. I felt the clean cut made even before the blade found its destination, and Naruto's subsequent cry of agony brought a cruel smile to my face.

I lifted my lashes to see what damage had been done, and was slightly taken aback that he had somehow managed to prevent it from going as deep as it should have. The wound was nothing more than a gash to his left shoulder, and though the blood poured freely (and he looked slightly ashen now), there was no denying I had triggered something within him. His eyes seemed to flash with a darkness I had never seen before, and as I took a step back to brace myself for his attack, I felt...rather than saw the loose rock slip beneath my feet.

_Fuck!_

I really did try to steady myself; did my utmost best to hold my ground, but I was tired as well. I was also losing a lot of blood thanks to Naruto's lucky strike, and in my desperate attempt to hang on to my dignity (by not falling flat on my face), I was instead greeted with a painful, jarring, and mind-numbing round house kick to my already aching jaw. This sent me sprawling across the cold, wet ground for several feet until I came to a back-breaking stop against the steel cage.

I was sure I lost consciousness for a second, but I did somehow manage to shake my head slowly to get some kind of orientation to my surroundings, only to sense a shadow fall over me.

_Shit! Shit! My sword...I have to get my sword...my...fuck! I don't have it!_

It had fallen from my grasp earlier, and not only that, it was staring right at me; for Naruto now had the sacred weapon within his grasp as he towered and straddled over me with pure murderous intent in his eyes.

_It's all over..._

Something hard seemed to sink within the pit of my stomach, my mouth felt dry, and I dully realized that this was what it must feel to be at the brink of death. I gritted my teeth (as agonizing as that task was) and tried to sit up, but Naruto would have none of it.

He stamped a foot hard on my right wrist to keep me prisoner, and as if that wasn't bad enough, watching the blade of Riku-sama's sword suddenly plunged deep into my right upper thigh had me howling louder than I ever had in my life.

_Oh...my...fucking God!_

"How does that feel?" came the cold question as I bit my lip and struggled against the unwelcome sting of tears that filled my eyes. I hissed in my breath and fought a groan as he twisted the sword a little harder into me until I was sure he had pierced right through the bone. I was never going to walk again. Probably. If I got out of this alive, I was no doubt going to be limping for the rest of my life. This son-of-a-bitch...

"FUCK!" I bellowed as he withdrew so suddenly, the world did lose focus and go dark for a minute. I forced my lashes open again, and watched in horrified fascination at the dark pool of blood beginning to form where he had stabbed me. I tried to sit up, but the glint of sunlight on the blade as it was raised again told me that Naruto had every damn intention of finishing this here and now.

_I was going to die._

And perhaps I deserved it.

What had my life amounted to after all these years? What had I managed to achieve besides becoming nothing more than a puppet for Orochimaru? Who was I of use to anymore? No one. I had lost everything, so it was only fitting that my death would be in this steel cage for hasn't that been my life all this time? Haven't I been trapped in a cage of my own doing? I had truly believed I was doing the right thing; that believing in Orochimaru's doctrines of purification and finding a better life on the other side was a goal we all hoped to attain someday. It was the only way I could live and come to terms with my decisions to be his henchman. And now..._I was simply no longer needed._

I lowered my lashes and waited for the final strike; hoping he'd make it quick and as clean as possible.

_Kaasan...'Tosan...'Niisan...I'm coming to join you soon._

I held my breath and waited...

...and waited...

...and waited...

...and waited some more...

What the hell was taking him so damn long?

I opened my eyes wearily and lifted my gaze with what seemed like a monumental effort. He was still standing there; sword poised right above my heart, ready to find its destination and yet...he was trembling like a fucking leaf.

What the hell was his problem? Couldn't he even do something as simple as finishing me off?

"Well?" I rasped before feeling the uncontrollable rise of phlegm and blood in my throat. I couldn't control the cough even if I tried and was angry to find myself covering my mouth with a hand that shook just as badly as his was.

"Do it," I demanded impatiently. "Finish it, Uzumaki Naruto, and you can finally have your fucking freedom."

"GUDAN! GUDAN! GUDAN! GUDAN!"

"KILL HIM! KILL HIM! KILL HIM! KILL HIM!"

I smiled bitterly at the frenzied lustful cries from the spectators. I'd bet Orochimaru was smiling as well, and I hated to admit that I had never felt more alone and miserable in my life. To feel so much hate and animosity towards you...was this what all those sinners had faced in the past? Talk about getting a taste of one's medicine.

"You heard them," I finally said aloud. "Go on...right here..." I made a motion across my neck. "Take it off like you've probably fantasized about a million times. Do it, or I swear if I get up from here, I'm not going to forgive you."

"You..." He seemed to struggle with the words. The anger and hatred I had seen earlier were slowly being replaced with genuine bemusement and... was that _pity_? I would hate him even more if he was feeling sorry for me.

"You really want to die?" he queried as if unsure of himself.

"One of us has to," I replied and swallowed down the rise of another cough. My lungs felt like they were on fire.

"I don't get it...why? Why can't you just admit defeat and then I go? Why do I have to take your life?"

"Why not?" I sneered. "I was the one who put you here, remember?"

"..."

"So this is your chance, Naruto." I spat and watched my blood mingle with my saliva on the ground. How revolting. This whole place. This life...every fucking thing. "Kill me and be free."

"Aren't you even going to apologize?"

I raised a brow. "Apologize...for what?"

"For all the shitty things you did to me...to everyone else here! It's thanks to you and your goddamn self-righteousness that got us into this mess! You think you're fucking better than anyone else, and even when you're knocked off your pedestal, you still refuse to see the truth! The least you can fucking do is atone for **your** sins by saying you're sorry!"

Was he crying? Or were my eyes playing tricks on me? What a pathetic situation all around. I shrugged a little.

"My apology will be my death. When I am finally gone from this world...everyone will be happy." I smiled again; though it felt more like a grimace. "My only regret..."

I choked up, simply unable to continue.

_Damn it! Damn it! Damn it!_

The hitching of my breath was alarming; so was the realization that I was probably going to burst into tears of frustration and anger at how this was all ending. I had so many damn regrets. Not getting revenge for my family's death, for Ino's senseless death, not being able to restore my clan's reputation and prestige, not having the time to tell Asuma how much I appreciated him being my only and true friend, not being able to tell Haku just how excellent he had been as my man servant, and how his loyalty had made life a little more bearable, but most importantly...my biggest regret was not killing Orochimaru.

I had wasted so much time being a goddamn coward, and now...it was all just yet another pipe dream that would never come true...

* * *

><p>"Well, this is turning out to be a down right bore," Orochimaru stated with a frown of impatience as he watched the proceedings. "What is the son of Minato Namikaze doing?"<p>

"Will you stop calling him that?" Danzo growled with a loud rap of his walking cane on the ground.

Orochimaru had done his best to remind him of Minato at every opportunity he got, and Danzo realized that the more he watched his once prized assassin's legacy in battle, the more intrigued he became. His ability to think quickly on his feet was something Danzo admired. Naruto was not exactly a prime swordsman, but what he lacked in skills, he made up with unconventional tactics that seemed to work to his benefit. So far, against the traditionalist like Sasuke – whose excellent skills had been on full display from the beginning – Naruto had proven to be an impenetrable wall of defense.

Admirable indeed. It was a shame Minato had not lived long enough to appreciate how well his son had turned out...

"A pity you didn't want him when he was offered to you," Orochimaru had drawled after Hidan's defeat. "What a delicious specimen he is. I have no doubt he'll make an excellent watchdog for me."

"Do you really think he'd want to remain behind these walls for you?" Danzo had sneered.

"Oh, I have no doubt you'd go courting him for your syndicate once he's released," the pale man responded with a knowing smirk. "But I have a feeling he's not going to be that easy to catch. Sometimes with such difficult prey, you have to take it nice and slow." He licked his lips in a manner that made Danzo's skin crawl. "Uzumaki Naruto is a delicious treat to be savored at my own pace. However..."

He stood and held up his hands to quiet the crowd and to get the fighters' attention. Orochimaru had felt a well of disappointment at Sasuke's rookie mistake. Though he had found himself rooting for his once treasured prize at some points during the battle, his lust for Naruto had taken precedence and his impatience knew no bounds. Sasuke had to be eliminated once and for all so he could begin his wooing of the blond sinner, and yet...it seemed like the son of Minato had the inability to conclude a battle effectively...well besides what happened to Hidan.

"You are keeping us waiting, Uzumaki Naruto," he announced with a flourish. His sentiment was echoed with loud boos from the crowd. They too wanted to see it end dramatically. "You must eliminate your opponent for your freedom, remember?"

Naruto, who by this time had turned away from Sasuke to focus on the speaking leader, raised the sword and shook his head in confusion. "Why? He's already down and out! I've won the fucking fight! So set me free goddamn it!"

"BOOOOOO!"

"SHUT UP YOU ASSHOLES!" Naruto roared back. For a second, some members in the crowd were taken aback at his insult, but they returned with even louder boos to combat his scowl of fury.

Orochimaru smirked. "So you do not wish to kill Sasuke then?"

"There's no fucking point!"

"Then perhaps I should make things a little more interesting," came the cryptic comment that had even Sasuke lifting his lashes to try to make sense of what the man was trying to say.

"Set up the flames!" came the unexpected order that had even the audience murmuring in confusion.

Several guards marched forward with lit torches in their hands, and everyone watched in horrified fascination as the oily moat – which surrounded the cage – was suddenly engulfed in flames, hence creating a ring of fire around the steel dome. Naruto blanched in disbelief. It was all making sense now. They really had no plans to let him go in the first place. This had all been...been...!

"YOU'VE GOT TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME!" He roared as he shook the cage only to hiss as the flames just about licked at his fingers and he had to withdraw. The damn things were getting higher and higher!

"Until one of you dies, the flames will continue to burn," Orochimaru declared. "So it's your choice, Uzumaki Naruto. Kill him and live, or be merciful and you can both go to hell hand in hand. I'd say you have about ten minutes to come to a decision before the smoke fills your lungs. Such a terrible way to go...so terrible..."

He pretended to sniffle as if in pain; though his eyes were as dry as they had ever been and filled with glee. He listened absently to the crows of delight from some of the guests behind him, but did meet Danzo's cool gaze and shrugged as if saying "what else did you expect?"

"Now...son of Senju," he muttered as he watched the flames lick at the cage as if hungry to engulf the young men within. "Let's see if you finally give in to your ancestor's ability to survive the harshest of challenges."

Unfortunately, he would only have a moment to savor this thought when a sudden piercing scream from behind, caused him to turn away from the dome in surprise. It was the fat, ugly wife of the Minister of Finance; now slumped in her chair with a bullet wound to the head and her brain matter splattered against the exquisite kimono won by her attendant. There was a heartbeat of stunned silence before the gruesome sight galvanized the guests into action as they began shrieking and trying to escape in terror and panic. There was another grunt of pain; this time an elegant arrow finding its way right into the wrinkled forehead of the Minister of Finance himself before he sagged lifelessly onto his wife's body.

_What in the world...?_

There was another loud grunt of agony; this time coming from none other than Danzo himself! Orochimaru watched in dull fascination as the older man was sent to the floor; a dark and rapidly spreading stain forming on his right shoulder where the bullet had lodged itself deeply. Danzo looked stricken; his features paling as he briefly contemplated the notion of dying in this hell hole right next to the man he loathed with a passion.

"Get down, Orochimaru-sama!" came the sudden cry as Kimimaro dove in front of him to intercept yet another arrow that had been coming his way. His quick reflex was able to catch the deadly weapon in his left hand; eyes narrowing as he took in the make and style of it. With its poisoned tip, slender bamboo shaft and feathered tip (clearly that of an eagle), there was no mistaking the archer behind it. It had been many years since he had seen the man, and even more incredible that he was actually still alive. Lord Orochimaru was no doubt going to be interested in hearing about this.

"Get him out of here," he ordered to his subordinates. "Make sure he's not seen by anyone. I'll remain here and keep an eye out."

Danzo's bodyguards (Torune and Fū) - who were still berating themselves for not being quick enough to protect their boss - did their best to lead the bleeding man away to safety. However, Fū pointed towards the stands to the left where he was able to detect the person responsible for the shooting...at least he assumed he was able to detect someone for all hell had officially broken loose in the stadium. It was full fledged pandemonium as the spectators were hurrying and scurrying in an effort to escape from something. The act of selfishness was in full effect for no one seemed concerned about any one else's safety. They trampled over each other, pushed and shoved and wailed for the heavens to forgive them their sins.

"What the hell is going on?" Orochimaru bellowed as he allowed himself to be taken into the building by Sakon and Ukon via an underground route that only a few (excluding Sasuke) knew about. He hated feeling defenseless especially when attacked without warning. For a man who always relished being in control of any given situation, this was a moment where every fiber of his being thrummed with fury and frustration. By God, when all this was over, he was never going to forgive the bastards responsible for this.

"There's a huge fire on the grounds, Orochimaru-sama," Sakon explained as the elevator doors closed behind them. "We don't know where or how it started, but several guards and officers were found dead around the grounds and most of the sinners quarters are engulfed in flames. It's spreading fast, my Lord, and heading towards the northern section of the stadium. Most of the officers are already working hard to put them out and..."

Orochimaru tuned him out as his mind whirled with conflicting thoughts. A fire...dead guards and officers...of course. Whoever planned this had taken into consideration that during Gudan, Byaku-Shinkyou was at half (if not less) its strength when it came to security. If their aim had been to assassinate him and destroy this place...well, they had at least succeeded halfway. He could afford to lose a few buildings; nothing that couldn't be replaced over time. All the same, this...this..._ambush_ was completely unacceptable!

The fucking cowards!

"Scour every nook and cranny of this damn place and find the ones responsible for this," he barked as the doors finally opened and he strode angrily toward his private surveillance room. "I want just one of them. Just one of the perpetrators is more than enough for me, do I make myself clear?"

"Yes, my Lord!"

They both bowed and slipped out quietly; leaving behind the rigid figure of a man who could only watch while his false kingdom slipped away in black and white chaos upon miniature television screens. It would take him nearly a half-hour to finally function properly, and when he did, it was with a leveled head and cool detachment.

His enemies had grossly underestimated him, and they would pay dearly for their sins.

* * *

><p><em>Naruto:<em>

_Can't breathe. Can't...fucking...breathe..._

It wasn't so much the flames that were bothersome, but the cloud of dark smoke that was now filling our prison rapidly. My eyes were watering like hell, and I could barely suck in a gulp of air without wanting to vomit. Visibility was shot, and I had to stretch out my hands like a kid playing hide and seek in a darkened room to find my way around. Or rather...

"Goddamnit! Watch where you're going!" he hacked/coughed in annoyance.

"Sorry!" I hacked back because I had nearly tripped over Sasuke...and I'm guessing from his holler, it was on the leg I had stabbed too. Ouch.

Still it was a good thing because I had finally found him. I crouched and ran my hand across the ground...his boot-clad feet (probably filling up with blood now)...up his leg...

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" he growled.

"Trying to help you, you ungrateful asshole," I hissed back.

Hell, talking wasn't such a good idea either. Every second spent opening my mouth, meant inhaling more of this godforsaken smoke. That Snake Dude was right. The more time we spent in here, the worse off we were. All I had to do was kill the son-of-a-bitch and this would be over, right? Except I didn't have any needles left. Someone must have packed it up when they were moving out the bodies, and though a part of me didn't want to be that merciful, it would have been the perfect opportunity to use the damn things.

(_Could have killed him earlier though, right?_)

I sighed. Yes. I definitely did have him at my mercy...hell, I _still_ do. God knows I might have actually done the deed, because I was so fucking pissed off with the whole thing and was ready to at least stab his heart...until I heard that damn voice.

_Haku._

It was as if a fog was immediately lifted when I heard my name, and I had looked up to see the poor guy crying his eyes out and just about falling to his knees begging me not to do it. Even Shika had a hard time controlling him, and I would have been embarrassed at his antics, but the crowd was in too much of a frenzy to take note of one lonesome guy's plea for forgiveness. Everyone else wanted Sasuke dead. Everyone but the one guy who was so damn loyal, it was sickening.

I swear if we both got of this place alive, I'd make sure Sasuke thanked Haku profusely for saving his life. That or Haku could get a goddamn raise in his pay check...if he even got paid that is.

**Cough. Cough. Cough.**

"Jesus," I gasped at how deep and dry Sasuke's cough sounded. The guy was practically about to hack out a lung. "We've got to get out of here."

"No...no...way...out..." Sasuke managed to rasp. I couldn't make out his face anymore. The smoke was just that thick. "Locked...in...remember...?"

Ah fuck! That's right. We are trapped in this hell hole and no one seems to be willing to assist us. Shit!

I struggled to my feet; nearly stumbled back to the ground and tried to touch the cage. No good. It was hot, and screaming wasn't going to help either. I sank back to the ground beside my nemesis and thought it fucking ironic that I'd end up dying with this guy by my side. Damn.

Would have been nice to at least say a final goodbye to Asuma, Shikamaru and even Haku...Chouji even...and old man chef. I would kill (hah! Get it? Kill!) to get a drink of ice cold water...or maybe have just one last taste of chef's special curry _udon_ with shrimps and floating noodles in -

"...li...listen..."

"What?" My head was beginning to feel woozy with smoke inhalation, fatigue, and hunger...and thirst.

"Listen...scr...screams..."

I strained my ears through the roar of the flames assuming Sasuke was mentioning the cries from the audience to finish this battle once and for all. However, there was something quite different about the screams this time around. Something...panicky about it. What the fuck was happening out there?

"Some...something...something's wro...wrong..." Sasuke tried to say but ended up coughing badly again. The guy could barely speak, and I swear I really had no plans to do this, but I figured...what the hell? This was going to be our last few minutes together on earth, so I might as well try to bury the hatchet and be kind to the bastard. He didn't deserve it, but if Haku could still find the good in him, maybe I could try to find a little as well.

I ripped out the rest of the sleeve of my yukata (which hurt like a bitch because my entire left side was going numb too with pain and stiffening as well) and blindly sought for his face. I nearly poked his eye out with a finger, which resulted in me being insulted – albeit weakly – but I managed to finally wrap the cloth around his nose and mouth so he could at least breathe a little easier if nothing else. I bet his leg was all stiff now; happens when you get stabbed and I had gone pretty damn deep with that heavy-ass sword. If he didn't die from the smoke...then the blood loss would do it.

"Sorry," I muttered thickly; as I tore off the other sleeve and wrapped my nose and mouth as well in pitiful protection. I didn't expect him to say anything, and I assumed he had passed out anyway, which was good because I didn't want to hear him talk back to me and besides, this was going to be my last confession on earth.

"I really don't like killing people," I wheezed and lowered my head to control my breathing. Everything was beginning to feel..._loose_. Know what I mean? Like you were on a high, the kind of high you get after smoking a little something (thanks to Kojima for that experience that I was never going through again). I closed my eyes and imagined me drifting through a dark tunnel...seeking that light that would take me to heaven.

Hmm...did murderers go to heaven?

"And I'm sure deep down...you probably don't like sending people to Gudan or chopping their heads off."

I was talking. Wait...was I _actually_ still talking? For one thing, it didn't really sound like my voice, and I believed I really was having an out of body experience, because I sounded so fucking far away.

Yeah...I was probably already dead and my spirit was now doing the talking. Wow. Who knew dying was this easy and somewhat painless? It almost felt..._good_ and _peaceful_.

"Haku really likes you, you know...and I don't really understand why, but I guess it's because I haven't seen that side of you he sees. Never will I guess. At least not in this lifetime. Anyway...sorry about your shitty life...with losing your family and all. I didn't have such a great life either...you at least knew your parents. I didn't really know my dad and my mom...well she died before I could really understand what the fuck was going on. Lived my whole life drifting from one place to another...looking for someone who would give a shit about me...and just when I thought it would never happen...she walked into my life. Haruno Sakura." My lips trembled with a smile. "She had the most beautiful green eyes and the softest pink hair you'd ever see. She was...she was..."

The tears came suddenly and I made no effort to wipe them away. Besides, I was already dead and I guess spirits can cry because my chest was hurting so bad, and it had absolutely nothing to do with the carbon monoxide my corpse was still inhaling.

"I loved her so damn much," I sobbed. "She was everything to me...the only person who made me feel like I was worth something. She never judged me or made me feel like I was any lesser than she was. She was always there for me...always smiling...and even on days she felt like shit, she'd always say I was the one who brought the sunshine to her. Me. A street rat with hardly enough money to buy her a decent birthday gift was capable of making her that happy. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her...to have her be the mother of my children...we'd...we'd...be happy...always...together...but...but..."

It was too much to bear. A hitched breath was my undoing as my lungs finally had enough and sent even my spirit evaporating with a whisper. I found that I had wanted to spill my guts to this guy...to let it all out even if I knew he probably hadn't heard a damn thing.

_Fuck it all...dying really sucks._

I barely felt my head thudding to the ground, but I could swear ('til this day) that I had felt something squeeze my hand a little. Maybe it was Sakura's spirit telling me it was going to be all right...or maybe God himself saying all would be well again or maybe...just maybe...

...

_...nah. _

It just couldn't be. I might as well wait for hell to freeze over, and considering I was already on a one-way ticket there...I would have an eternity to wonder what might have been if Sasuke and I had _actually_ been buddies in our lifetimes.

Well, whatever. At least if I saw him in hell, I'll be the first to kick his ass for dragging me there in the first place.

_...the selfish little prick..._

* * *

><p>"Damn. Missed."<p>

Shisui lowered the bow as he watched his target(s) disappear quickly into the shadows. He tucked the weapon within his robes again, just in time to blend in with the rest of the crowd as he noticed Kimimaro et al now looking in his direction.

The stadium was in full chaos mode and he watched dispassionately as bodies were shoved and trampled over, all in their quest to find the nearest exits. There were a few (dead) bodies scattered around; the unfortunate ones who were too weak to overcome the massive exodus, and Shisui crossed himself and considered it divine punishment. It was part of the risk of their plan in starting the fires, and though Itachi had frowned upon it at first, Shisui had been quick to remind him of their mission. It was inevitable that some bodies would have to be scarified for the greater good after all.

Speaking of which...where the hell was Itachi? The last he has seen of his companion was his attempt to take out Orochimaru from his vantage point in the topmost seats, but that hadn't turned out as planned either. Those damn guards were just too effective. They would have to go to Plan B -

"Shisui-san!"

He spun around at the sound of his name, noticing it was Asuma, with two other people he did not recognize, running toward him with panic etched on their faces.

"What's the matter?"

"The dome!" the girl...no wait...the voice was a little too deep to be that of a girl. "Sasuke-sama and Naruto-kun are still in there!"

_Oh shit. _

"Where's Itachi?" he asked; having to yell as they began to dash towards the middle of the arena. It was virtually impossible to see the dome now for the flames had risen even higher still and it seemed to be shrouded in a sea of black smoke. How the fuck were they supposed to get in there?

"Here he is!" the girl/boy cried out as the man in question approached them, though having to shove his way through those running against him. He was tucking away his gun within his robes and had a look of concern etched on his features.

Shikamaru, who had darted a little further ahead to do some quick reconnaissance, returned with curt instructions. "The South bridge doesn't look like it's too badly affected. We can probably get into the dome from there. Asuma? You have the keys, right?"

The officer nodded and without saying another word, they dashed toward the South bridge...or would have if they suddenly weren't blocked by about ten officers.

"Where do you think you're going, Asuma-san?" Officer Touya barked. He had never really liked Sarutobi in the first place, and this was as good an opportunity to deal with the laid-back officer.

Asuma cursed beneath his breath. "Sasuke and the sinner are still in the dome," he replied coldly. "We have to get them out of there."

"Lord Orochimaru's orders are absolute," came the cold sneer. "You are not allowed to...urk!"

A hand had reached up to his neck, his eyes widening comically until everyone finally noticed the gush of blood now flowing from his fingers before he fell flat on his face like a log of wood. Sticking out from his jugular was a small throwing knife, and it didn't take a scientist to figure who was responsible for it. Haku was still poised with about five more of the deadly weapon in his hands; his eyes narrowed as he watched each of the officers with deceptive calm.

"You will let us rescue Sasuke-sama," he stated in a tone that left no room for argument. "Go, Asuma-san! Shikamaru-san! I'll take care of them myself."

"You bastard!" the second-in-command growled as he rushed toward Haku with his sword unsheathed. Unfortunately, he didn't get very far for one of the figures in the dark robes had moved as fast as a flicker of a shadow; causing the officer to fall to the ground in a boneless heap. No one was sure of whether he had been struck with a weapon or simply punched, either way, Asuma, Shikamaru, and Itachi figured they would not be needed at this point as they headed toward and across the bridge. Those officers would be handled with Shisui and Haku in charge.

Crossing the moat felt like they were walking in a sea of fire...literally, and the problem came to a head as they approached the steel door. It was too damn hot to touch!

"Back away," Itachi commanded firmly. He waited until Asuma and Shikamaru were behind him, withdrew his gun from within his robes, and with careful aim at the locks, shot about five rounds into them before they finally gave way. It took several hard kicks for the heavy door to final grind its way to the ground with a resounding crash.

Feeling his panic rising as a wall of thick smoke nearly sent them toppling into the fiery moat, Itachi blinked his stinging eyes rapidly, quickly covered his nose and mouth with the sleeve of his robe and struggled to find the boys in the gloom. He tried to open his mouth to call out to them, but with the deathly silence in here, he knew it was going to be next to impossible for them to hear him and vice versa.

_Please be alive, _he prayed feverishly as he began the desperate yet blind search. _Both of you...please hang in there. I beg of you..._**live!**


	16. 16: Beyond the Walls

******Notes:** A big, big, big, big, BIG thank you to all your wonderful comments/feedback on the last chapter. *passes cookies all around* You guys rock! I really appreciate how deep you're all getting into the plot and how you are able to think outside the box and figure out why something happened or what caused it to take place. I love it! So I might not be getting a gagillion reviews, but I do appreciate the few I get from you lovely folks. It means a lot.

**Warning:** A bit of heaviness in this chapter, but it was inevitable. :(

**P.P.S:** I hope you guys are getting my responses to your reviews? I know I try to reply to each and everyone of you, and with the way this site keeps acting up, makes me wonder if you're getting them at all. Anyhoo, onward and upward! Enjoy!

* * *

><p><strong><span>Chapter 16: <span>**

**Beyond the Walls**

_The mists rise over  
>The still pools at Asuka.<br>Memory does not  
>Pass away so easily.<em>

_-Akahito_

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke: <em>

The flickering flame of the oil lamp illuminated yet created dark shadows around me as I continued my descent into the bowels of the earth. The uneven, winding staircase carved from seemingly unyielding rocks, whispered to me like the walls I caressed with every step I took. Though cold and dank in here, it was still a familiar sight and one that was welcoming and pleasing to the senses. It was one place Orochimaru would never discover, for it lay beneath my private _onsen_ via a discreet route not obvious to the naked eye. To anyone looking, it would seem like nothing more than just the usual cave walls common around Byaku-Shinkyou. However, a diligent and careful rearranging of several 'loose' rocks would slowly reveal the underground lair where all of my clan's secrets and history resided.

I could still remember the day Father had shown my brother and me the 'key', how wide-eyed and slack-jawed I had been as we seemed to walk deeper and deeper underground until I was sure we were going to get lost. I will never forget how in awe I had been as he finally led us into a room - about the size of the dining hall - with walls etched with writings, markings, and drawings of the Uchiha clan's history: its achievements, triumphs and failures. At the end of the room stood a long stone slab in the shape of an altar for some kind of pagan sacrifice (though it wasn't for that purpose). I would later learn that this room had been used for important/secret meetings. On the wall above the altar was our clan's painted symbol now slightly faded and cracked with time. On either side hung large _gunbai_ (war fans) made of wood and attached with heavy-looking chains. On it sat the largest and oldest scroll I had ever seen, and with the oil lamp flickering ever so slightly as Father leaned over it to begin reading, he reminded us of how great our family was and how we were to continue the legacy of the Uchiha long after he was gone.

With his small hunting knife, he pricked our fingers and made us write our names in blood; a ritual that made my heart swell with pride for though I was so young, I knew it was a meaningful rite of passage. I didn't fully understand it, but my brother must have because he had looked as grave as father through it all. However, as the years passed, I came to appreciate just what it had signified, for every name on that scroll had belonged to a high-ranking male member of the clan. Itachi and I had simply continued an unbroken tradition.

Even more surprises awaited us as father – again – tapped several stones in the walls with his fingers, which in turn, created another secret chamber where even more treasures awaited. It wasn't so much that it was actual money or jewelry or trivial things like that, but more ancient scrolls, books, and manuscripts that contained vital information regarding my family. Even Itachi, who never looked awed about anything (at least most of the time) couldn't stop his jaw from dropping at the seemingly thousands upon thousands of reading material to go through. It was stupendous to say the least. As a child, I had no idea what they contained, neither was I really that interested, but I knew Itachi was and on days he'd go 'missing' for hours on end, I figured he must have spent those moments buried nose-deep within these scrolls; studying as long as he could.

After the massacre, I forgot about the underground lair as shock and grief had become second nature, and I was simply under Orochimaru's direct 'care'. It wasn't until I was twelve - when I was finally allowed to return to my family's quarters to reside – did all the memories come flooding back. I had even come this close to telling Orochimaru about the secret hideaway (so eager I was back then to please him), but until this day, I could not tell you what made me change my mind. Maybe it was because I wanted it to remain the closest remainder of my family, and I did not want their memories tainted or tarnished with anyone else discovering it. Hence, on days or nights when I wasn't on duty and didn't have much to do, I'd sneak into the hidden chambers to read and to absorb as much as I could. Down here, I felt safe and comforted by the spirits of my ancestors. Down here, I felt I was no longer alone and that every word I read was simply whispered reassurances from those who wanted me to never forget them for as long as I lived.

However, there was something a little strange about my journey today. I could not place a finger on it, but as I stopped to listen, I was sure I could hear screaming voices though they seemed disembodied and distant. I shook my head and continued walking; telling myself I was only imagining things. It was impossible to hear anything from the outside within these walls. It was literally sound proof and nothing could penetrate –

**FWOOM!**

I cried out in surprise and stepped out of the way; painfully slamming into the uneven wall behind me and almost scraping the skin off my back with the force of the collision. What in the world was that? It felt as if a dark and heavy shadow had just dashed past me and wound itself up the steps without looking back. I tried to move, to take another step forward, but I was frozen in place. Fear? I didn't think so. It was as if my feet were suddenly one with the stones and it was impossible to lift them. I strained and struggled to free myself; aware that something oily and hot was beginning to permeate my senses. I was about ten steps closer to the underground hall - close enough to find my sanctuary - when the sounds shot through my panicking mind. It was not only the screams now (and those were getting louder), but it was the undeniable stench of...well...

_(fire)_

...something burning. It was the sound of papers crackling as the flames must have found their way into the hidden library to consume everything with indiscriminate greed. My panic and desperation grew tenfold. I had to stop the damn flames from destroying everything! I had to get my legs moving!

_Goddamnit! Why don't you fucking move?_

I glared down at my feet as if wanting to berate them for not cooperating, when I all but screamed in horror at the realization that I no longer had any legs! No...wait...it was my right leg that was missing. In its place was nothing but than a bloody stump; a stump that was now jettisoning blood so thick and dark, it was beginning to flood the steps leading down to the lair. I was going to drown in my own blood. Either that or these damn flames were going to kill me.

I tried to scream for help, but I knew it was going to be next to impossible for anyone to hear me. My voice was trapped within my throat though I knew I was shouting. The fiery flames were drawing closer; attracted to my blood and gobbling it up with eager licks and ferocity. Thick smoke, as dark as night, rolled in ominous clouds toward me. Choking, stifling, suffocating, I could no longer breathe. The very act of sucking in air was torture in itself. I was still unable to move, and I knew without a doubt that I was running out of time. I was going to die here; buried several feet beneath the earth with no one knowing where I was. I was going to be all alone; as I had always been from the start...as I had always known...

(you are never alone, Sasuke-sama)

_...I...Ino?_

(my dear Sasuke-sama)

_Is that you, Ino?_

If it was odd that I was hearing her voice, now of all times, I could not explain it to you, but I did sense her presence behind me all the same. I could feel that long blond hair envelop me in a comforting shroud with warmth that had nothing to do with the dangerous ones below. Her slender arms wrapped around my shoulders and tried to tug me up into safety.

(come with me, Sasuke-sama)

But I still could not move. She was not strong enough to help me out of the darkness.

(please come with me)

I tried. I _really_ tried, but each time I felt I was making some kind of progress; my lower body would not cooperate.

(come with me!)

And now her voice was changing...morphing into a combination of voices that reminded me of Haku, Asuma, that annoying blue-eyed sinner, hell I was sure I even heard Kimimaro in there...and then back to hers again.

(you must come with me!)

_I...can't...! I'm trying...goddamnit!_

(Sasuke!)

_That voice!_

I gasped in disbelief; my eyes widening in shock as it seemed to pierce right through my soul. Deep, commanding, authoritative -

_Fa...father...?_

No...it wasn't him. Close, but not quite. Could it possibly be -?

(Come with me!)

The force with which I was yanked away from the fires below was enough to dislocate my shoulders, and yet I couldn't really feel a thing. It was a sense of weightlessness...of floating or being suspended in air for several minutes before I hit something solid again. I was being moved away from the scene quickly, and yet I wanted to tell this person..._the voice_...that I was leaving something precious behind. The fire was going to destroy everything...our family's clan...the history...everything was going to be turned to ashes. We couldn't just run away. We had to rescue and protect them! It was all I had left!

_No...please let me go back...I have to get back there...please...let me go...I have to get back!_

I struggled and fought against the hands (or things) that would not release me, and perhaps I would have succeeded, if not for the sudden sensation of being pricked with something cold and sharp that quickly sent me into a stupor of blissful emptiness...

...an emptiness where nothing simply mattered anymore.

* * *

><p><em>Naruto:<em>

Kojima was waiting for me.

Not a surprise all things considered, since I figured if Hell was my final destination, I would meet the bastard there anyway. Pity no one had told me that Hell would look eerily like his sky-rise apartment complete with its wicked state-of-the-art entertainment center that was blasting some rock music by an artist I could not decipher. I thought it ironic that our meeting place this time would be the final scene of our unfortunate reunion.

And another thing...why the hell was he naked?

_(he was naked that night too...remember?)_

Figures.

All the same, I looked down at myself quickly in case I was in the same state and was glad to see that I was in the same outfit I had worn on that fateful night. As for Kojima, he was sprawled on the white leather couch, a bottle of whiskey in his left hand while his right fiddled with a remote control that apparently controlled the volume of the speakers. A lit cigarette dangled from the corner of his lips, which would curl up every now and then to reveal his gold tooth as he cursed when the device would not cooperate. I was again reminded of how strong this guy was with the way his muscles bulged and strained with every movement. There was not a spare ounce of flesh on him, and did I mention how intimidating (yet cool) those damn tattoos of his were? Save for his dick (he was sporting a boner by the way) and his face, he was a walking work of art (no pun intended).

"Don't just stand there, Fox Boy," he drawled without looking at me. He was still battling with the remote control. "Have a seat."

I shrugged and began to mention that I'd rather stand, but some unseen force had my knees weakening; sending me flopping into the opposite couch where I was given a good view of the lines of cocaine sitting innocuously on the low coffee table. I felt my mouth run dry; wondering if God (or the Devil) was going to reenact that horrific scene all over again. Sakura would come running out of the bedroom...giggling...laughing...flushed with excitement...naked...

_No! No! No! I don't want to think about that!_

"What are you mumbling to yourself for?" Kojima asked. He had risen to his feet to stalk toward the entertainment center. With an angry kick at a speaker, the equipment whined, sparked a little and then fizzled out with a hiss. So much for state-of-the-art.

"Piece of junk," Kojima spat with disgust. "Gotta buy a new one tomorrow."

What the hell was he talking about? Didn't he realize he was already dead? Unless Hell had stores...

I winced as he stooped to his haunches to unplug the wires; giving me more of a view of his taut ass that I would rather not see. With a shake of my head, I struggled back to my feet and paced to the glass sliding doors which led out to the balcony. It gave one a great view of the city skyline, though there was something quite odd about it tonight. Oh the familiar lights from the buildings were still visible, but there seemed to be a fireball (at least it looked that way) in the distance; a fireball that was becoming bigger and spreading faster by the second.

Strange.

"What are you doing here by the way?" came the genuinely bemused question. "Thought I had seen the last of your ugly mug."

I snorted. "Trust me; I don't want to be here either."

The fireball sent fiery orange and red sparks into the heavens, and I was sure I could hear some screams from somewhere. I guessed the damn thing was killing people down there. Where were the firefighters when you needed them? I couldn't hear those sirens going off.

"Then why are you here?"

I jumped as his hand fell upon my shoulder. I hadn't even heard him move closer to me, and the stench of his cigarette had me coughing (which was painful to do by the way) and blinking away the tears that sprang to my eyes. I tried to get away, however, he wouldn't release me, for his grip became a little tighter and his eyes were alight with that look of mischief I was all too familiar with.

"I don't know," I replied honestly; faintly aware that his goddamn erection was rubbing against me as he moved closer still. "I was in some shitty dome match and somehow ended up here. I'm guessing this is Hell if I have to be stuck with a jerk like you."

He pretended to be hurt. "This the way you speak to your big brother?"

"Fuck you," I snarled and shrugged off his hand. How dare he consider himself my brother after the stunt he pulled? "And go put on some goddamn pants. I don't need to see that thing pointing at me for fuck's sake."

He grinned and looked down at what was offending me. With a chuckle, he wrapped his fingers around the hard flesh and dared to shake it a little as if getting out the final drops after peeing. "My dick bothers you that much? What's the matter, Fox Boy? Worried you might want to start playing for the other team? I heard being stuck in an all-male establishment for such a long time can begin to warp your sexual preferences."

I shuddered at the implication. "Sorry to burst your bubble, but I still like chicks, all right?"

"Yeah...pity." He smirked and reached out to cup my chin before I could move away. "I wouldn't have minded swinging the other way with you, you know. Ichimura was right. Your skin is pretty damn soft for a guy. Hah! You know how many times I had to tell that fucker to keep his hands off you?"

I could feel my stomach getting colder by the second realizing how all those extra looks I had received from Ichimura, as nothing more than him being a big creepy asshole, was actually something else. I swear if I saw him again...oh wait...I won't get that chance anymore, will I? Goddamn it. Why the fuck did I have to die in that shitty place anyway?

"Funny," I hissed beneath my breath once he released me and his dick to wander towards the bottle of whiskey he had left on the coffee table. "I always thought you were the chick magnet. Who knew you liked the boys too?"

Kojima snickered and blew out a cloud of smoke. "Nothing wrong with experimenting every once in a while, Fox Boy. Live a little is what I say. Besides..."

He crushed out the cigarette and grinned at me. "You think I don't know you have the hots for that 'chick' with the black hair and eyes? The one you met on the bus?"

I am not sure of what expression I gave, but his loud burst of laughter had me turning several shades of red and I was literally burning up...no...sweating actually. I glanced out the window again as a loud **FWOOM **filled my ears. The fireball was now about five miles away and it was now so huge, it seemed like it was just about engulfing the entire city, and yet Kojima didn't look or sound panicked.

"...have to get out of here..." I muttered, ignoring Kojima's teasing about my 'mistake'. I didn't have to indulge him with stories of how I had come to realize Sasuke was _not_ a girl, and that I had come to terms with that blunder.

"...might turn out to be better than that pink-haired skank you were dating -"

I reached out to punch him – purely on reflex – but ended up howling with agony as he caught my wrist and twisted my arm behind me in a swift move. The pain was excruciating, and I was now literally sweating buckets. I fell to my knees and heard myself screaming for mercy, begging him to release me or my goddamn arm would fall off. However, being the sadist I knew, it did not surprise me to find him laughing at my anguish.

"Scream," he whispered thickly into my ear before giving it a lick that had me shivering in response. "Keep on screaming, Naruto, because nobody can hear you here. Nobody is coming to rescue you. This is Hell, and we are both going to burn together...for all fucking eternity."

_No...no...no...please no...please...noooo!_

My eyes widened in horror as the fireball was now mere feet outside his window. The screams were much louder now, and as I shut my eyes and waited for the explosion to send us to the deepest abyss in this ungodly place, I heard something (someone) calling my name and shaking the damn shoulder that was already hurting like a bitch.

_...uto-kun...!_

_...ruto-kun...!_

_...aruto-kun...!_

_...Naruto-kun...!_

* * *

><p>"Naruto-ku...!"<p>

"All right already," I groaned and shoved (or at least tried to) the hand away from me. "Stop screaming so loud for fuck's sake."

God, my voice sounded like I was speaking with a thousand cotton balls stuck in my mouth and my throat felt as dry as the desert. Scratchy too. I needed something to wet it...and fast.

"...ater," I croaked and then tried again. "Water...please."

"Okay!"

I recognized that voice. Who wouldn't after being cooped up in that place with Kojima for company? Never thought I'd say this, but hearing Haku's eager and breathless voice was like heaven. I missed the guy and would have hugged him if I could get my ass moving.

"Here you go," he said a few minutes later which forced my lashes open; though the left side of my face felt like it was ten sizes too big. "Can you sit up?"

I nodded, only to grimace as I struggled to move my body into said position. My initial thought was that I was back in that godforsaken closet I called a 'bedroom' or worse back in the dungeons, but as I shifted and realized that the soft things beneath me were actually sheets and what had fallen off my chest was actually a decent blanket, my blurred vision cleared to give me a better view of exactly where I was.

_Definitely not in a dungeon...and what was that familiar yet salty smell? And why was the place moving like so..._

"Whoa..." I muttered as the ground literally seemed to shift on its axis. My initial thought was that it was an earthquake (those happen now and again), but the ground seemed to right itself and it was now back to its soothing lull that reminded me of the few times I had taken trips on fishing boats...

"It's okay, Naruto-kun," Haku was saying with a small smile on his face. Though it wasn't that bright in this small, stuffy room (I could only spot the oil lamp hanging from the rafters), it wasn't hard to see the lines of strain on the guy's face. He looked like he was dead tired and there were streaks of tears still etched on his cheeks to match the reddened eyes. Had he been crying for me?

(or maybe it's for his master. I'll bet Sasuke didn't make it after all)

I felt my stomach sink at the thought and my heart give a strange little twist that almost hurt. If that was the case, it was too bad I didn't join him because I was part of the reason for it anyway. I guess I must have stabbed the guy a little too hard and the blood loss coupled with the fire and smoke inhalation...it was too damn much to ask for him to survive.

"Drink up, Naruto-kun," he urged as he raised the plastic cup to my lips. I couldn't look him in the eye anymore because I was sure that behind that smile he was blaming me for everything. Should I apologize? Tell him that I had no choice but to strike? It wasn't as if I had wanted Sasuke dead (though a small part of me still believed he deserved it). I had only planned to hurt him, but who knew that psycho Snake Dude would add the fire thing to the mix? And besides...where the heck were we?

Ah, bliss. The rush of the cold water down my parched throat felt like the elixir of life or something even sweeter. I was so thirsty, I gulped it all in a rush and gave a very loud belch when finished; something that made the guy chuckle weakly before pulling away to place the cup on a small wooden table on its last legs.

"Do you feel better now?" he asked.

I nodded and wiped my lips with the back of my right hand; my left was in agony. I couldn't even lift it if I tried and I didn't bother to. In fact, a part of me wanted it to remain this way. It was Sasuke's memento to me; a parting gift if you will. Since he was dead, my bum left arm and shoulder would be penance until my dying day.

"I'm...sorry..." I muttered as I lowered my head in shame and repentance.

"Sorry?" Haku sounded bemused. "Sorry for what?"

I scratched the bridge of my nose and wondered how to phrase this. "Uuum...your master...what happened to him..."

Haku was shaking his head before I could even get done; the same small smile on his face. "You don't have to apologize, Naruto-kun. You had no choice."

He was taking this pretty well, wasn't he? "So...you're not mad at me for...you know..." _Aiding in his death,_ my mind screamed.

He shook his head again and if anything, his smile was a little wider. "We're just glad that you both survived. Itachi-san was able to find you in time. Any minute longer and we might have lost you two."

He looked like he was about to say something else; his smile wavering, but he shook his head a little and forced the smile on his face again. "We should be thankful. I _am_ thankful."

And before I could gather my confused thoughts about me, the guy was throwing his arms around my neck and hugging the beejeesus out of me, forgetting that I was still hurting all over. Still, I didn't have the heart to push him off or chide him for not being considerate. I could hear him sniffling; a sign he was crying again and with an inward sigh, I hugged him back...well as much as I could without breaking anything else. I was bandaged up like a fucking mummy (my left side) and could only move that arm so much. All the same, something he had said had sent a flood of relief through me.

/...you both survived. /

So the douche bag wasn't dead after all. Thank God for small mercies.

"Where is he?" I finally asked when I was sure he was under control again.

"In another cabin..."

"Where are we though?" Haku pulled away and wiped his face with the sleeves of his kimono. Were those bloodstains? Or was it the trick of light and shadows?

"On a fishing boat," he explained quietly. As if to illustrate this, he rose unsteadily to his feet and lifted a wooden latch connected to a window that he pushed open to let in the full experience of the open sea. For a second, my mind refused to register this anomaly; perhaps trying to tell me that I was supposed to be locked up in that godforsaken place and not in some fishing boat in the middle of the ocean. Just how the fuck did we end up here anyway?

"Urgh..."

"What are you doing?" he asked in panic as I pushed aside the blanket and tried to rise to my feet. I had to really see this for myself. I had to be sure this wasn't just another cruel dream; that Kojima wouldn't appear at the door to laugh in my face and tell me how fake this all was. If that was the case, I had a feeling I was going to kill myself.

"You're not supposed to move, Naruto-kun," Haku was pleading, but I wasn't listening. I nearly fell on my ass as my knees gave way, and I had to hold on to the side of the walls (God, this place stinks of stale fish and wet wood) before staggering toward the door.

"Shisui-san said I shouldn't let you get -"

"Who the hell is that?" I grumbled and shrugged him aside as he tried to block my way. "Listen, I just want to see outside, that's all. I just want to make sure this isn't all a dream, okay?"

"But..." he began, still looking uncertain, but with a heavy sigh, he finally relented and wrapped his arm around my waist and with measured steps, began to lead me outside as if dealing with something fragile. Not that I could blame him. I was a walking pile of hurt.

However, all that faded to oblivion as the first gust of fresh air and salty breeze nearly sent me to my knees with shock and a happiness words simply couldn't describe. For almost six months – from my incarceration at the local police station to my days spent in Byaku-Shinkyou – I had been denied this...this majestic wonder of nature. Though it was pitch dark and the only source of illumination came from the glow of the boat's lights, it did not deter my pleasure in the slightest. I was in euphoric bliss and the insane urge to burst into loud (hysterical) laughter was only superseded by the uncontrollable surge of stinging tears that filled my eyes. I clutched the gunwale of the boat and lowered my lashes; allowing the night breeze to soothe my aching flesh. I didn't bother wiping away the tears because if this was a dream...I wanted to savor it for as long as I could. Hell, if I could lean down and scoop up some of the water to taste or even dive into it and swim forever, I didn't mind in the slightest.

"Amazing, isn't it, Naruto-kun?" came the soft question beside me. I had almost forgotten I had company. I nodded, not trusting myself to speak; besides, I didn't want him to see me crying and if he asked, I'd just lie and say it was the sprays from the ocean causing it.

"I've never seen the sea before," Haku confessed as he rested his forearms on the wooden gunwale. "I was almost too shocked to believe it existed when I saw it yesterday night."

"Yesterday night?" I blinked in confusion. "Just how long was I out?"

"Hmmm...this is the second night. We've been at sea since then."

"We?"

Haku nodded. "Me, You, Sasuke-sama, Shikamaru-san -"

"Shika's here too?" I whooped in excitement. "Holy shit! Where is he?"

I turned around; scrubbing my face with the sleeves of the clean black yukata I was wearing, to scour the deck. It was also an opportunity to take a really good look at the vessel. It wasn't that large, but it was still a commercial fishing boat all the same; one that must have spent quite a few years in action. You could see the wear and tear in some places; old but still as sturdy as ever. I could hear some voices from the starboard side, and began to head in that direction. All I could think about was seeing my friend's face and letting him know just how wonderful it felt to be away from that hell hole. In fact, I couldn't wait to see Asuma-san as well. We could finally share another drink together with no fear of being accosted by pesky guards or hard-headed officers.

"...don't think it's a good idea," Haku was saying just as I made the turn and noticed the lonesome figure of my friend. He was sitting at the stern; feet dangling over the edge of the boat and a cigarette dangling from his mouth. He looked...spaced out or lost in really deep thought and hadn't even bothered to turn around to acknowledge me – though I was yet to call out to him.

Well I was just about to anyway, when Haku squeezed my good arm gently. "I wouldn't bother him right now, Naruto-kun," he said quietly with a slow shake of his head.

I wanted to protest, to tell him that he should butt out of my business, but there was something in Haku's eyes that lodged the words in my throat. His eyes were shimmering with tears again, and this time I felt my heart rate quicken with anxiety and a realization that something was terribly wrong.

"What...what happened, Haku?" I asked softly. "Is it something to do with...how we ended up here? Where is Asuma-san?"

I had asked the question that was almost painful to get past my lips because somehow I knew what the answer would be even before the blunt answer came from someone I'd never seen before.

"Sarutobi gave up his life for your freedom, Uzumaki Naruto."

We both spun around at the sound of the sonorous voice. The speaker was wearing dark robes, his black hair short and somewhat spiky (though not as severe as mine). There was something about his features that reminded me of Sasuke; maybe it was his eyes which were just as pitch black as the first captain's. His features could be considered kind...maybe if he smiled, but he wasn't, so it gave him a somewhat severe look as if perpetually upset with the world. Either way, the vibes I was getting from him was mixed. He wasn't the kind of guy you wanted to mess with, but he was non-threatening as well.

"Shisui-san...," Haku began.

Ah...the famous Shisui that seems to be calling the shots around here, though his words about Asuma still had me frozen in disbelief. Just what did that mean exactly?

"I don't get it," I stuttered.

(oh you get it all right. You aren't deaf. You clearly heard him say that Asuma 'gave up his life', which could only mean...)

"I don't get it," I said louder as if trying to shut down the voice of reason screaming within me. I hobbled up to Shisui and clutched handfuls of his robe to shake him a little as if he was the cause of my confusion. "What does that mean?"

"Leave him alone, Naruto-kun," Haku interjected, while trying to release my grip from the other man's clothing. "It's not his fault. Asuma-san made the decision himself." He choked out a sob and covered his face with hands that trembled. It was clear he was not going to be able to tell me the story, so it was left to Shisui to spill the details of what took place.

"Perhaps if you released me," Shisui stated mildly, with a quick glance at my hands. "I could tell you what happened."

I stared him down for a minute; but I should have known this guy wouldn't budge. He held my gaze steadily and I got that weird sensation that he was able to read into my soul (just like Sasuke), which bothered the heck out of me. With a grunt of reluctance and frustration, I released him and sank onto an upturned wooden crate.

"Well? Start talking," I prodded impatiently. My head was beginning to pound with a headache that made my eyes blur. The joy of being free was no longer as sweet as it seemed and as Shisui began to speak, it slowly dawned on me that my whole life had literally been hanging on a thread...

* * *

><p><em>Hope<em> was a fickle word; tossed about like paper wishes on a windy day.

Itachi considered himself a realist, and knew that with every second spent in this man-made Hell searching for a body (or bodies) that might not even be recognizable when eventually discovered, could be a recipe for disaster. He could barely see now and his eyes, nose, and mouth suffered the effects of the thick smoke that was gradually making him light-headed.

And still he prayed as he never had before.

_Please...live..._

Now literally on his hands and knees, he allowed his hands to do the searching. With every desperate shuffle forward, he clung onto that fickle word – _hope_ – and when he eventually encountered something hard and not rocky, his heart leapt with joyous relief. However, a tug revealed that it was only his companion – Asuma – waving the smoke away and nodding at him with a thumb pointed over his shoulder. "This way", he said without speaking though his features looked pinched and grimy with soot and sweat. Obediently, Itachi followed; knowing how funny this would look on any other day as both men were now crawling blindly like babies.

However, Asuma came to a sudden stop, which almost had Itachi colliding into his derriere. Again, the bigger man motioned the air with his hand and pointed in front of him. "Found them!" his action screamed. Words could not describe the surge of relief and gratitude that filled Itachi at that moment. He scrambled closer to Asuma and felt around for a body. _Hope_ filled him as he made out a leg...thigh...and without giving it a second thought, he slid his arms beneath the still warm body and staggered to his feet. The problem now came in finding their way back out, but there was a slight _fizz_ sound and through the gloom, both men could make out the sparks of what looked like a cheap firecracker. They headed in that direction as quickly as their legs could take them...following the fizzling firecracker until light gusts of fresh(er) air began to fill their lungs and away from the crux of the fire.

"Hurry!" Shikamaru was ordering as he led them across the bridge. He was the one responsible for setting up the 'light' to show the men the way out. "I think I saw Orochimaru's personal guards coming this way!"

Coughing (painfully), and with his vision nearly blinded, Itachi shook his head lightly before looking down at whom he had rescued. It was the blonde one; barely recognizable with the combination of blood and ash all over him. His wounds looked terrible and there was no doubt he would need medical attention and fast. However, it was a choked cry from Haku (who was running up to them with Shisui in tow) that had him looking towards Asuma. Naturally, he had rescued Sasuke and what Itachi saw of his little brother nearly made him cry out in shock as well. Sasuke – who was already pale to begin with – literally looked like a sheet though blood and soot had coated his skin to give it an even more worrisome pallor. Like Naruto, he bled from several places, his jaw was swollen, and his right leg was literally drenched with blood so dark, it looked black from here.

"He's lost a lot of blood...both of them," Shisui was stating firmly. He was slipping out of his outer robe to wrap it around Sasuke's body. This galvanized Itachi into action as he lowered Naruto to the ground and began to remove his robe. However, Asuma was already taking charge. He motioned for Itachi to stop -

(don't want anyone knowing who you are, do you?)

...and promptly wrapped Naruto's body with the _kamishimo_ he had been wearing.

"You need to send them out of here," Asuma was saying. "Take them to a hospital or wherever and get them stitched up pronto!"

"We can't risk sending them to a nearby hospital," Itachi deduced with a thoughtful frown. "Orochimaru is likely to have his henchmen searching for them...us. We have no other choice but to take them along."

"Do you have a medic on board?" Asuma asked with a nod of understanding.

"Two...and Shisui's not bad himself," Itachi added with a weak smile as they both rose to their feet; each carrying one of the young men in their arms.

"All right, let's get moving. Haku! Shikamaru! You come too!"

With Asuma leading the way, they kept their heads low and tried to blend in as much as possible with the remaining spectators still desperate to escape. Haku and Shisui brought up the rear, still keeping guard in case any other officers tried to stop them. The last scuffle had ended rather quickly, with both men able to take out the ten officers with hardly a sweat. Haku – who would have rather not killed anyone – was in a state of mind where rational thinking or being benevolent was not in consideration. This was Sasuke-sama and Naruto-kun's life on the line. Anyone who tried to prevent them from accomplishing their goal would not live to see another second. All the same, he had to admire the way Shisui-san had fought alongside him. Haku had always thought he was fast, but this mysterious dark-haired man was ten times faster. He had never seen anyone move so effortlessly or kill with such precision before. It was quite admirable. He slid a glance at the older man, but could read nothing from his expression. Perhaps if they got out of here safely, he could find the time to –

"Fuck!"

Asuma's loud curse forced them to halt in their tracks; senses alert as they glanced around them with caution and wariness. With a quick and concerned glance at Asuma, Shikamaru grimaced as he noticed the cause of the man's cry. A small throwing knife – similar to the one Haku used – was now lodged deep into Asuma's left shoulder, but like the stubborn bastard he was, Asuma had not dropped Sasuke neither did it seem as if he had any plans to stop.

"Keep going," he grated when he noticed Shikamaru's expression. "You think this little thing's gonna stop me?"

"But..."

"Get down!" Haku cried out as another throwing knife came hurtling towards them. This time, however, Haku was quick to knock it aside with his; sending the enemy's weapon into the stands.

"I can't believe you'd end up siding with them, Haku. You disappoint me," came the familiar voice before them as the cloud of smoke cleared a little to reveal Kimimaro sauntering in their direction. He stopped and glared icily at the motley crew; his lips quirking into a bitter smile as he noticed the two newcomers.

"My guess was right after all," he muttered. "Shisui of the Shadows as you are known. The best assassin since Minato Namikaze to work for the Bakufu Syndicate. Ironic, isn't it?"

Shisui's jaw and lips tightened, but he said nothing.

"And Itachi Uchiha...there were rumors you were still alive, but nothing concrete enough to verify that. Yet here you stand before me – a ghastly ghost of the past. Orochimaru-sama will be intrigued to hear abouturgh!"

He stared, almost comically, at the dark patch that was beginning to spread around his lower right torso. Jutting from the wound was a familiar throwing knife, which Kimimaro withdrew with a loud grunt to toss it to the ground with disgust. He lifted red-rimmed and furious dark eyes to the young man he had rescued all those years ago.

"Haku..." he began with a growl; ignoring the pained expression in the servant's visage. It was clear that it had hurt Haku to do that, but Kimimaro did not care. He began to withdraw his pistol from its holster attached to the hip of his _hakama_. "How dare you...!"

"You talk too much, Kaguya," Asuma growled, and with a lift of his leg, he kicked aside the weapon from the surprised man's grip. "If you want to fight so much, you'll have to deal with me first."

"You traitor," Kimimaro growled. "We should have killed you while we had the chance."

"Heh, you wish." Asuma smirked and turned to Shisui. "Here...take Sasuke and get the hell out of here...all of you. I'll take care of this freak show myself."

"Do you really think you can escape?" Kimimaro hissed as he watched the quick exchange. "I have guards stationed all around the stadium. You will not make it out of here alive. I guarantee that."

"Guarantee this," Asuma grunted as he pulled out the throwing knife now that he was free of carrying Sasuke's almost lifeless body. It hurt like hell, but this was no time to dwell on that. He withdrew his _katana_ and pointed it squarely at Kimimaro; lips quirking into a wry smile. "It's about time I tested out my skills on you. It's been a long time coming."

"Asuma," Shikamaru said quickly with a shake of his head. "We'll stay and fight -"

"Go," came the firm command from the older man. "All of you. The more time you waste here, the less likelihood of those two surviving. Get them the help they need. Got it? I can take care of myself."

"We'll wait for you at the designated location," Itachi began as he began to back away. Though he would have liked to stay as well, Asuma was right. They really had no time to waste. Both Naruto and Sasuke looked even worse and every damn second counted.

"Give me one hour," Asuma replied with a small smile. "If you don't see me then -"

"We'll be waiting for you," Haku insisted firmly. "For as long as it takes."

"Let's go!" Shisui was yelling. He was already jogging towards the exit with his precious cargo for he had noticed the approaching officers and there was no way he could fight in this condition. Luckily, he spotted several of their comrades who were quick to dispose of the opposition as quickly as they appeared.

Both Itachi and Haku gave Asuma one last look before joining Shisui, but Shikamaru didn't budge. He knew he wasn't that much of a fighter and his knowledge of _kenjutsu_ was just enough to get him out of a jam. He had no weapons right now either, so what could he really do but stay behind and help out –

"Go, Shikamaru," Asuma said tightly. "You are no good to me here and besides..._shit_!"

He saw it before the younger man did and his quick reflexes kicked in to push Shikamaru to the ground as the bullet found its target within the same shoulder that had been struck with the throwing knife.

"Asuma!" Shikamaru cried out as he noticed the growing pool of blood that was now drenching the lower part of his yukata. "You...!"

"GET OUT OF HERE!" came the roar that pierced right through Shikamaru's heart. It hurt...it really hurt to be spoken to in such a manner, but he realized that he really was going to be a hindrance if he remained. Biting his lower lip hard, he scrambled to his feet and began to back away on legs that shook with every step.

"Asuma..."

"You really don't know when to quit do you, sinner?" came the low question as the pistol was now trained again on Shikamaru to finish the job. Kimimaro cocked the hammer and it would have gone off, if the _katana_ hadn't appeared from nowhere to just about slice off his wrist.

"Your opponent is me," Asuma panted as he staggered to his knee; both hands gripping the handle of his sword tightly. "Resorting to that cheap weapon. Why don't we finish it like the battles of old...with our swords, hmm?"

Kimimaro smirked and lowered the gun. "As you wish. Run away, little scared sinner. Not that you'll get very far anyway."

Shikamaru ignored the insult as his gaze remained trained on his longtime friend and companion throughout his miserable stay in this place. He _knew_. Somehow he knew that he would never see Asuma again, and knowing that there was absolutely nothing he could do to prevent what would happen, made it even worse. He felt a rough tug on the scruff of his yukata from behind, and before he could turn around to figure out who it was (turned out to be another member of the organization), he was shepherded out of the stadium like a sack of potatoes.

_Thank you...for everything..._

The last image he would see of his friend and mentor was of him still on his knees while five soldiers marched up behind him with their rifles pointed at his back. For while Kimimaro pretended to want to engage in a sword fight with the officer, the firing squad was being set up at the same time.

_How cheap and dirty...what an undignified way to die._

As he was shoved through the crowd and toward the exit, Shikamaru was spared the sight of watching Asuma's brutal end, but he knew that for as long as he lived, the deafening sounds of over twenty gunshots would _never_ fade from his memory.

In the waiting van, where two of the medics were already working on Sasuke and Naruto to the best of their abilities, the rest of the occupants didn't need Shikamaru to open his mouth to tell them what must have happened. His stricken expression was more than enough to convey the tale. And as Haku lowered his head and burst into silent tears, they realized they wouldn't have to wait for an extra hour after all.

They would never have to wait for Asuma Sarutobi on this mortal earth.

* * *

><p><em>Naruto: <em>

It wasn't true.

It _couldn't_ be true.

The story was a good one...a fantastic one if you believed in such action plots. That wasn't the kind of thing that happened to people you knew...to people you really liked, right? That wasn't the kind of thing that happened to a guy who looked like he could take all the bullets in the world, suck it in and spit them out before going 'haha! I told you I was bulletproof, you fuckers! Take that!" That couldn't have happened to...to...to...

_...damn it!_

I could feel the hot drops of my tears wetting my clenched hands, unaware I had been crying all this time. The worn and wet floorboards blurred before my vision; my heart hurting like hell at the notion that I had lost one of the few adult friends I had in my life. There had been no real reason for Asuma to want to hang out with me, and yet the guy had gone out of his way to make surviving in Byaku-Shinkyou a little more bearable. I would miss his crude jokes and boisterous laughter. I would miss the way he'd cuff me on the head when I began to complain about his lessons being too hard or boring. I'd miss the way he'd smoke his cigarette or pipe...the sweet smell of his tobacco while he guzzled down a bottle of beer or sake.

I couldn't even begin to imagine what Shika must be going through. Asuma was like a fucking father or older brother to the guy. I know their relationship wasn't _like that_, but you get the idea. They were that _tight_ as buddies, and it was a friendship that I had envied a little. If Kojima hadn't been such a fuck up, it was the kind of thing I would have wanted for both of us; to have someone I could talk to at all times, share my innermost secrets and fears without being ridiculed or mocked. I wanted a guy I could drink sake or beer with, shoot the breeze and teach me all sorts of shit that I didn't know. Shikamaru had that with Asuma, and now, the one person he could rely on had been taken away from him in such a cruel way.

It hurt..._a lot_.

"Sasuke-sama will be crushed too," Haku was whispering to himself. "Asuma-san was like a brother to him. If he hears about this...he'll...he'll..."

I sighed and wiped my face; suddenly feeling weary and resigned with all of this. We were 'free', but for how long and at what cost? This sucked big time.

"You must be famished," Shisui said; probably mistaking my sigh for being hungry...although my stomach chose that moment to growl, which was both embarrassing and very inappropriate. Even if I did say I wasn't hungry that would be a damn giveaway.

"Haku, prepare something for Naruto in the galley, will you?"

"I'm not really that hungry," I began weakly, but Haku was already on his feet; probably needing something to do than sit around and mope. He was out of sight before I could stop him, leaving me alone with this man who was now leaning against the side of the boat with his arms crossed and that same intense gaze trained on me. What the fuck was he looking at?

"What?" I finally pouted irritably. "What do you want from me?"

Shisui shrugged and then gave a small smile. "Let's just say looking at you is slightly unnerving."

I raised a brow in confusion. "Huh?"

"Save for the scars on your face, you really do take after your father."

I stiffened and sat up a little straighter. "You...you knew my father?" Why the hell was my heart beginning to pound so fast? It wasn't as if I knew the guy – my dad that is – after all, he had passed away before I was even born. "How did you...?"

"AAAAAAAAHHH!"

The sudden scream – slightly muffled but still a scream all the same – had us turning sharply toward a section of the starboard where a door was immediately opened and another weird guy just about ran out before slamming the door shut behind him.

"Jesus fucking Christ," came the breathless gasp from him.

This dude was wearing the same dark robe Shisui adorned, but unlike Shisui, his black hair was much longer and in a ponytail. When he turned to us, there were deep lines etched on either side of his cheeks, but there was no mistaking those features that – again – reminded me of Sasuke. I think it was the eyes because they were pretty deep set and intense.

"Didn't go so good, did it, Itachi?" Shisui asked with a smirk of amusement.

_Itachi?_ Wait...wouldn't he be...?

"He woke up – _finally_ – took one look at me and screamed like he had just been stabbed all over again."

_Ouch._ Way to liken his reaction to my actions in the dome.

"I think I sent him back into his coma," Itachi muttered and rubbed his chin with a heavy sigh. He finally noticed my presence and gave a weak smile. "Good to see you awake, Naruto. How are you feeling?"

Did he want the abridged or unabridged version of just how I felt right now? I settled for giving a noncommittal shrug just as Haku appeared with what looked like a sandwich and a cup of water. Trailing behind him was yet another person I had never met before, but considering how long it had been since I had seen one of 'these' kinds of people up close and personal, my eyes must have bugged out of my skull as I gawked shamelessly in appreciation.

It was a _woman_. Praise the heavens! A full-fledged _woman_...I hoped.

"You shouldn't have gone in there like that, Itachi-san," came the feminine voice that was stern with its chiding. _Phew._ Definitely a woman. No mistaking it. "You should have known it would be a shock to him."

"I'm sorry, Karin," Itachi apologized with a sheepish smile. "I was just so eager to see him and...well..."

"Wait until he's a little more awake and oriented to his surroundings," the woman said as she finally lowered the hood of her robe to reveal flaming red hair to accompany her bespectacled features. She was pretty...in a severe way (if that makes any sense). Kinda like the librarian/teacher type who would 'spank' you if you misbehaved. She slid a glance in my direction and dismissed me just as quickly before making her way toward the room Itachi had just evacuated.

"Here you go, Naruto-kun," Haku invited as he placed the meal beside me on the crate. "Eat slow bites, so you don't throw up."

"Listen to the man," Shisui said with a wry smile. "He knows what he's talking abou -"

"EEEEK!"

This time we all turned toward the same area that held Sasuke – apparently - and watched as Karin all but ran out with her hands over her head in protection. Something flew right after her and plopped into the sea with a splash.

"Your brother's turning into a fucking menace," Shisui deduced dryly, though he still sounded amused.

"I'm just trying to help you!" Karin was screaming angrily. "You don't have to take my fucking head off!"

"...tachi!" We could vaguely hear from inside. The voice came again; much louder, stronger, and definitely pissed off. "Where is he?"

"You're needed," Shisui said with a chuckle as he shoved Itachi forward with a slap to his back. "Want back up in case of an emergency?"

Itachi gave a wan smile and seemed to take a deep breath. Goodness knows he was going to need it. I took a bite of the sandwich (nothing more than two slices of ham, lettuce and some sauce I could not recognize) and idly contemplated sneaking in to listen to their conversation. I was made to believe that Sasuke's family had died, so if this guy here was actually his real brother...there was definitely going to be a lot of explaining to do. However, a motion on the other side had me turning in that direction. It was Shikamaru getting to his feet. The commotion was probably annoying him as he began to make his way to the port side.

I made my decision there and then. He needed me more than my listening in to the brothers patching things up. And so lifting my plate and cup, I signaled to the others that I'd be following the other party. I wanted to know more about my father from Shisui, but that would have to wait as well. Being there for a friend in need was definitely much more important than knowing about a father that was never there.

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke: <em>

As a child, listening to _kaiden_ tales being told by Old Man Kagami, in front of his convenience store, was always a great way to kill time. Several of the neighborhood's children would sit on the raffia mats next to the entrance, where he'd regale us with stories of weird occurrences and creatures like the _kappa to shirikodama_, the _umibōzu_, and _nure ogano_. Our young imaginations would take flight, and goodness knows how many times I annoyed Itachi with my whines about definitely, definitely, _definitely_ seeing a kappa in our garden pond, and could I please sleep with him that night because I was sure the kappa was going to attack me. I was an impressionable child, but I outgrew such flights of fancy quickly and realized they were all nothing more than entertaining stories conjured from the mind of a senile old man. So in addition to me not liking psychics and phony mind readers, I no longer felt intimidated at the concepts of ghosts or spiritual beings from the other world.

However, nothing...and I mean absolutely fucking _nothing_ had prepared me to see one face-to-face.

At first I was sure I was still hallucinating, for I was just crawling out of the foggy clouds of my dreamless sleep, when that...that..._face!_ suddenly blocked my field of vision. What was even worse was that _the face_ had spoken to me...called out my name as if we were on familiar terms.

I have no idea where the scream came from, but it did anyway; wretched from the depths of me as if trying to come to terms with what my mind was desperately trying to make sense of.

_It simply couldn't be!_

The last time I had seen that face, there was still some baby flesh 'roundness' on his features. He had only been ten years old when he was taken away from me, but I could never forget those tell-tale lines that stood out on his cheeks; those lines that made him unique...special..._my_ brother. Now, the face was different; older yet still with those markings that would have distinguished him in a crowd. Those eyes that had always been filled with warmth now looked haunted and filled with a sorrow that could never be appeased, and though he had smiled a little, it looked strained and weary.

_It simply...couldn't...be..._

The apparition disappeared before I could sit up to make sure it wasn't all a figment of my imagination, and my frustration grew tenfold when I felt my body unable to move as fluidly as I would have liked. I looked at myself in disgust. I was lying on a narrow cot in what looked like a cabin. There was barely enough room for another desk or chair, but they had been squeezed in here somehow. There was a small window opened just little to let in some fresh air, and I could smell the tangy salt of ...the sea? How was that possible?

I shifted and felt the blanket, which had covered me, fall a little to reveal my bare but bandaged chest. My left forearm was also wrapped in the thick white cloth and I noticed a makeshift (and quite crude) IV line connected to a port near my wrist. However, it was my right upper thigh that was the worst of it all. It felt as stiff as a piece of wood, and looking at the amount of thick wrapping around it, it was no wonder getting up was going to be next to impossible.

_Fuck this..._

The sound of the door opening had me looking up sharply; my heart rate and pulse kicking up a notch as I anticipated his appearance again. However, I was greatly disappointed to see it was some female I had never seen before. She was smiling shyly at me -

(why? What the hell was so amusing?)

...and moving towards a small cabinet from which she removed several vials and more dressings. "Good to see you awake, Sasuke-sama," she was chirping along. "I have brought some -"

"Where is he?" I growled; wincing as my throat burned with every word I uttered. My tongue felt heavy in my mouth and I needed something to quench my thirst, but that could wait.

"...this should help heal those wounds on your -"

_Was she even listening to me?_

"Where...is...he?" I spoke a little louder.

"Hmm?" She spun around with that same stupid smile on her face. "Do you want me to...eek!"

I slapped away the hand she had reached out to touch me with and glared coldly at her. "Where the fuck is Itachi?"

"I...Itachi...?"

Maybe she's senile, slow...or just incredibly dumb. Either way -

"You can't get up, Sasuke-sama," she cried out and tried to touch me again. This time, I reached for one of the vials in frustration and all but threw it in her direction.

"Don't touch me!" I snarled.

"But...eeeek!" she shrieked, and thankfully this time got the message enough to run out of the room.

"Where is Itachi?" I bellowed after her. Someone else must be out there, and if they heard me, they would definitely come running. "Where is he?"

_You must be a figment of my imagination. You **cannot** be alive. You **cannot** be here. You are **dead**. You've been dead for fourteen years. You, Father, and Mother were killed before me. You made me believe you were no longer a part of my life. For years, I prayed to your spirit, wondering why God didn't take me away with you all. For years I had to live in that godforsaken place with that bastard, who in the end wanted me dead after all. He just prolonged the torture, that's all. Instead of killing me instantly, he took his time to destroy me, and now what is left? What do I have left besides this cruel injection of you back into my life?_

_Itachi...nii-san..._

A shadow fell into the room and I looked up sharply, this time mentally bracing myself for what my mind was now finally coming to terms with.

"Sasuke..."

_Itachi...my dead brother...my dearest dead brother..._

"...I think we need to talk."

_How can I ever forgive you?_


	17. 17: Reunion

**Notes**: What's this? A non-Thursday update? It's the end of the world! *lol* Seriously though, I was quite excited to write this chapter up, and it's all thanks to the WONDERFUL feedback I received for the last chapter from you lovely folks! Thank you so very much, everyone. You really have no idea how much your enthusiasm and support means to me, and it's such encouragement that keeps me going! So sorry I cannot respond to each and every single review I received, but know that they are read and very much appreciated. And to the SilverSauce who asked, yes, I do search for Japanese poems that fit the mood for each chapter or try to convey the emotions I hope to convert. In fact, as I write, I literally have pages of websites and books open so I don't screw things up while doing my research *lol* Anyhoo, enough with the yapping and onto the story. Hope you like! And as always, know that your comments are very much welcome! (((hugs)))

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 17: <strong>

**Reunion**

_Like a rock at sea,  
>At ebb-tide hidden from view,<br>Is my tear-drenched sleeve:  
>Never for a moment dry,<br>And no one knows it is there._

_-Lady Sanuki_

* * *

><p>"Sasuke...I think we need to talk..."<p>

His words hung like dead weight between them; the awkward pause that ensued broken only by the gentle licks of the sea's waves against the side of the boat as well as the faint disembodied voices of the other passengers outside the door he had gently closed behind him.

Sasuke continued to stare; all eyes and mouth slightly agape...before he seemed to realize he was close to drooling on himself and snapped it shut to form a thin and uncompromising line. Though the Itachi he had once known was tall (after all as a child, everyone else practically towered over you), this version of his brother seemed alien and foreign; an anomaly. The shadows in the cabin - coupled with how small (claustrophobic) it was - gave Itachi a somewhat intimidating presence, and even though Sasuke was sure they were almost the same height now, he still wished Itachi would sit down already. There was something rather smothering about the situation, and despite the window being open to let in some fresh air, he could still feel beads of sweat break out on his skin. Perhaps sensing this, Itachi motioned toward the lone wooden chair in the room.

"Mind if I sit down?"

He expected no answer and wasn't disappointed. All he received was a sullen glare, which he took for a 'yes' as he plunked himself on it with a soft sigh. He leaned forward, hands clasped tightly between his spread thighs, while giving the illusion of staring at the grimy and worn floorboards. In actuality, he continued to study his younger brother closely; able to tell from the tense body language that Sasuke really had no intention of making things any easier for him.

(and can you blame him?)

Now up close and personal, it was even harder to reconcile the young man before him to the little boy he had left behind. Without the protection of the _kamishimo_, Itachi could see the strength in those pale shoulders and torso, a sign that his brother had done his best to keep in shape all these years, either with his training or doing his duties as a watchdog.

(still never could get the sun to give you a nice tan, eh, little brother?)

As a child, many had mistaken Sasuke for a girl (especially when he was still a baby), and Itachi could still remember having to explain to the embarrassed person ("oh, such a cute baby sister you have there") that it was actually his _brother_. The baby cuteness would still plague Sasuke even as a precocious five-year-old; his 'adorable' features, a magnet to anyone who wanted to lavish all their attention on him.

Fourteen years later, the baby cuteness was gone to be replaced with strong, handsome features that were quite striking to the first-time onlooker. Those dark eyes he had thought inscrutable at the arena, now simply looked haunted and weary (or perhaps wary). Though there were no visible lines of age on his face, that still downward turn of Sasuke's lips was troubling. It really did seem as if the notion of smiling was bound to make his face fall off if he dared try, and if he indeed _did_ smile, it was only the kind that would be filled with cynicism or haughtiness.

With another inner sigh, Itachi rubbed his chin absently; wincing at the stubble he felt. It was a reminder that in the past two days he has barely had the time to sleep or even consider proper grooming. Considering how fast everything seemed to be happening, where the hell was the time for that anyway?

(and the problems are only getting started...)

"I'm sure you have a lot of questions to ask me," he began in an even tone. Should he smile? Try to act like this was just going to be a casual chit chat between brothers? He dared not. Sasuke was still looking pissed at the world (at him) and Itachi figured he might as well get on with it.

"Where to begin -"

"You can begin by telling me how the fuck you're still alive," Sasuke suddenly blurted out; his voice harsh and slightly trembling. He bit his lower lip hard and forced himself not to give in to the sudden surge of emotion that welled within him. It was the natural instinct to burst into tears; whether of frustration or of relief or of the notion that all this time he had assumed his brother had been murdered, he was actually still _alive_...somewhere on this planet..._living_...while he was stuck in that damn place with Orochimaru.

_All these years, you never came back for me,_ the child within him wailed. _I thought you loved me, nii-san. Why would you not come back for me?_

"I still ask myself that question too," Itachi replied quietly; suffering the angry look thrown at him with a weak smile. "I should have been killed that day, but I guess God had other plans."

_Big fucking deal,_ was Sasuke's initial angry thought, but he had to admit his curiosity was getting the better of him.

"You do remember I wasn't home on that day, correct?" Itachi asked, which caused Sasuke to frown a little in thought. Though the vivid image of his parents' death haunted him incessantly, everything else surrounding the events of that day was like a blur. For years, he had simply assumed that Itachi had gone out to fight, but now that he thought of it -

"I was out with Shisui...you remember him, don't you?"

_Vaguely,_ Sasuke wanted to say, but his mouth remained stubbornly closed. His brother had many friends...well not that many, but considerably more than Sasuke did at the time. Itachi did not let this sullen silence deter him as he continued quietly.

"Shisui and I were fishing that day when we heard the first explosions. At first we weren't sure of what was going on as we assumed it was probably some officers at the shooting range practicing, but when Shisui noticed the mushroom cloud of smoke coming from the residential area, he just about freaked out and began running in that direction; saying something was terribly wrong."

Itachi's hands clasped tighter still as the memories came flooding back. He could still remember how panicked he had felt as he watched Shisui's dark features. If Shisui (who was older than him by two years and was definitely the coolest _senpai_ in the whole world) could look worried, then there was definitely something not right. All he could think about was his family...wondering if they were still okay; hoping that whatever was happening hadn't affected their humble abode. He had wondered if he'd be able to make it on time.

"The closer we got to the main grounds, the worse it became. There were dead bodies everywhere...people we had known all our lives...slaughtered like animals on the street." His fingernails dug deep groves into the flesh of his hands, but he didn't seem to mind the pain or notice what he was doing. His gaze was distant now; fixated on the floorboards though Sasuke was sure Itachi was seeing nothing but the events of that terrible day.

"It was like being suddenly thrust in the middle of a war. We didn't have our weapons with us, and it was hard to tell who the enemy was at some point. Still..."

Still Shisui had just about lost his damn mind when he saw the motionless body of his mother and sister slumped against the walls of their home; their blood smeared upon the wooden panels like a grotesque paint job; a gruesome reminder of what had just transpired. He could remember his friend screaming in a voice that seemed torn from the depths of his soul, before he reached for a fallen man's katana to join the fray in the hopes of finding his family's murderer.

"I tried to call him back," Itachi whispered. "Tried to tell him that it was no use...we were only children and they were going to get us as well. But he wouldn't listen, and the last I saw was him running into the thick of the fight, slashing and thrusting at anything that looked remotely like the enemy."

The enemy; a faceless group of men in death masks and flowing dark robes, who rode on horses as black as night and were quick to trample on anyone who got in their path. Itachi shuddered. He could literally still feel the hot, steaming breath of those magnificent beasts upon his flesh, which now broke out in tiny goose bumps.

"All I wanted to do was get back home...to make sure nothing had happened to any of you," Itachi recalled. "I was sure Shisui was dead, and to defend myself I had to fight as well. Father always said that in a fight...in a battle for your life...you sometimes had to let go of your humanity when you want to survive. I think in those few moments – as I struggled to make my way home – I lost a bit of my humanity...and sanity."

A bitter smile came to the older brother's face. "I would get my first taste of killing another human being on that day, and I don't need to tell you how satisfying it is to watch someone you really hate go down before you in defeat. I can't remember how many more I did end up hurting or killing, but I did know that with every step I took, the heavier my katana became. Do you understand what I mean, Sasuke?"

_Yes,_ came the silent response. _I know exactly what you mean._ For in those early years, when Orochimaru had allowed him to partake in his first series of executions; words could not describe the weight, of knowing you had taken another life, upon one's heart. It was as if an elephant was sitting on your chest and crushing it, and there were nights when Sasuke was sure he would die in his sleep...unable to breathe.

"I didn't see it coming," Itachi continued. "But the pain, I _definitely_ did feel. Someone knocked the back of my head with a really heavy and blunt object, and the last thing I'd remember before passing out was how much I had failed you all. If I was going to die, I would have at least wanted to see your faces one last time, but I wasn't even allowed to do that."

He gave a short bark of a laugh that was tinged with that same bitterness Sasuke had noticed earlier. "When I opened my eyes... I was in a whole other country."

"Huh?"

Itachi smiled; a more genuine expression this time albeit a little one. "Huh is exactly right," he replied with a soft nod. "I had somehow ended up in China...Suzhou to be exact."

Sasuke resisted the urge to rub his eyes or gawk stupidly at this announcement. China? _China?_ Was he fucking kidding...how...when...?

"How did I get there?" Itachi asked with a light shrug of his shoulders. "Fishing boat apparently. Who was responsible? A young man by the name of Yahiko. He had no allegiances or alliances with the Uchiha, but he did have a strong sense of justice, and was obviously aware of just what was going on at the time. He and his small band of vigilantes had joined the fray at Byaku-Shinkyou, but when he realized that they were outnumbered and would not make much of a dent in the battle, he settled for rescuing the few he could. I was one of the lucky few...I guess."

Itachi sighed and rubbed his chin again. "Father and I had been to China once, but it was for only a three day business trip, and I couldn't remember most of what happened then. I couldn't speak the language very well, so you can imagine the culture shock I received when I was fully awake and found myself in the midst of new faces in a new land. Yahiko had left me under the care of his mentor and oldest friend, Li Jialun, in the middle of nowhere and by that, I mean I had little to no access to the outside world. "For my safety", Jialun would say whenever I'd query him. Apparently, Yahiko had given him strict instructions not to let anyone know I even existed. "If they know the heir to Byaku-Shinkyou was still alive, there would be no hope left." I don't think word of your survival had reached the outside world yet, Sasuke. Orochimaru kept you his secret as well...giving the illusion that everyone had perished in the 'ambush' until he deemed it fit to finally showcase you to the world.

"So yes...I was safe and sound in my new home, miles away from knowing if you had all survived or not, desperate to hear of some good news even something as little as knowing Byaku-Shinkyou wasn't completely destroyed. Believe it or not, Yahiko only came by to visit me one more time, and that was almost five years later. Naturally, I wanted to return back to Japan with him, but he would have none of it. "The situation is still volatile," he told me. "The few Uchiha left are either being recruited as Orochimaru's watchdogs or killed if they are defiant. The smart ones go into hiding and refuse to identify themselves as members of your clan..." And my brother? I'd ask. But his expression told me everything. None of you had survived was what his downcast eyes told me. I was the only one left. "But not to worry," he had assured me. "One day you will go back and reclaim your right. I will make sure of it. We are gathering evidence needed to take down Orochimaru and his partner in crime, Shimura Danzo. So trust us and let us do all the work." But I wanted to fight to, I pleaded with him. This was my battle after all. Those bastards had taken away everything I had left and I would not spare them if given the chance. "It's all well and good to go charging in there like a madman," Yahiko said. "But what good would that do you? Do you really think Orochimaru hasn't built himself a fortress now? Do you really think you can just walk into Byaku-Shinkyou and challenge him to a fight? You'd be dead before you even stepped upon the land. He **must** not know you're still alive!

"No amount of pleading and ranting and raving on my part would make him change his mind, and he left me again under the care of an ailing Jialun." Itachi rubbed his forehead wearily. "He was already an old man, you see, and though he had taught me the language, culture and everything else in-between, it was still hard to say goodbye to him when the time came. He died a year later, and because he had no offspring, I became the official leader of his little organization. It wasn't as if they were villains, but they were very good and loyal fighters ready to sacrifice themselves in a heartbeat."

"In other words," Sasuke stated flatly. "He was the head of a Chinese syndicate."

Itachi gave a wry smile. "Bingo."

Sasuke sighed and lowered his head. "Great."

It all made sense now, especially why he had received that 'message' from the Chinese guy Haku had killed on accident. Itachi still had his ties to them after all these years.

"I never saw Yahiko again," Itachi stated softly. "That was because the next time I was visited, it was by Nagato and his woman, Konan, both of whom had worked with Yahiko at the time of his 'accidental death'.

"Accidental...?"

"How much of an accident is it when your car blows up in the middle of the street?" Itachi asked with a wry smile. "Danzo – now Commissioner – was touting it as the work of terrorists, when he was the one responsible for it. It was obvious Yahiko's presence was now being known and felt, and they managed to get rid of him effectively. Nagato, who called himself Pein – because he believed he bore the pain of all the oppressed - had come with the single purpose of having me return to Japan and becoming their leader. To Danzo and his cronies, they believed they had gotten rid of the main problem by killing Yahiko, but they needed me to create a whole new organization; one that would be even more discreet. My initial jerk reaction had been to say 'no', that after seven years of being in China; of becoming family to so many people here, I had no intentions of returning to a country that could possibly no longer welcome me, but then he said five words that changed my life in an instant."

"What?"

Itachi looked up then to meet the curious dark eyes and felt his heart stir just as hard as it did all those years ago when in the presence of Nagato. "He said..."

(_your brother is still alive_)

"Your brother is still alive," Itachi repeated as if still unable to believe it himself, and Sasuke was embarrassed to find his cheeks burning with heat at the tenderness in those words. He could see his brother visibly trembling, and he realized now just how much Itachi must have suffered during those years with the belief that he had no one left.

_Just like me...we were both..._

"Believe it or not, after the initial shock of the announcement, I became furious," Itachi confessed with a weak chuckle. "I thought Nagato was only saying that to get me to return, and I did not appreciate his little joke. I threatened to have him killed, but Konan produced photographs...photographs that had been taken by someone they were working with on the inside...someone..."

Sasuke didn't need to know who that someone is. Only one person had taken a couple of photographs with him back then (well besides the official photographer who was required to take some pictures for the public records) and that person was none other than...

"Asuma," he whispered beneath his breath.

"Yes...Asuma," Itachi replied with an expression of pain Sasuke missed. "Asuma was my _senpai_ as well, and though he was not as close to me as Shisui...I still respected him and was more than surprised he had survived the ambush. Bottom line, the photographs did it for me...and I decided to come home."

Come home indeed. But to Itachi, it was more than just looking at the photographs. How could he adequately express how seeing those candid shots of his supposed 'dead' brother, looking embarrassed about something...or of how that innocent expression had wrenched his heart strings? How could he tell Sasuke how he had wept himself to sleep with the pictures clasped tightly in his sweaty palms? Of how he had walked around for the next few years with the images tucked within his wallet as a reminder of what he was fighting for? No...those were things he could not reveal to Sasuke lest he be seen as too overly protective.

He settled for scratching the bridge of his nose and stretching out his legs. The flame from the oil lamp was getting a little low and Itachi wondered how long he had been talking. It would be dawn soon...

"It felt strange coming back to Japan and being back in civilization...so to speak. Everything had changed, and I felt like a stranger all over again...role reversal you could say. Anyway...Yahiko's organization was a shadow of its former self. They had lost many of their members either by assassination attempts or the weaker ones quitting while they still had a chance. Who could blame them? Danzo and Orochimaru were tightening the noose on anyone who dared oppose them and it was becoming increasingly difficult to get ahead. All the same, Yahiko had done his homework and he had amassed several key information on why the ambush had taken place and the ones responsible for it."

"Wh...why?" Sasuke rasped through lips that felt dry. "Why did they do that? What was the reason for it?"

"Greed and power," came the simple response that left the younger one unsatisfied yet bewildered. However, when Itachi began to explain the intricacies behind Danzo and Orochimaru's plot to gain access to something their father had deserved, Sasuke could feel his insides getting colder by the second. _That was it?_ Pure jealousy and a need to be in power was the reason why his family and so many others had been ruined? He couldn't understand it. He couldn't understand why innocent lives had to be destroyed (his included) just because of two men's decision to want everything. It just didn't make any sense...

"...broke my heart when Asuma told me what you had become..."

_What?_

Sasuke looked up sharply. He had been so lost in his thoughts of fury and kindling revenge, he must have missed half of what Itachi was saying. However, the sad expression on his older brother's face was enough to have his cheeks flaming. He could already feel his defensive shield rising up and a childish part of him wanted to scream that it was all Itachi's fault for not being there to protect him from Orochimaru's crazy doctrines in the first place!

"Asuma said you were so ingrained into your teachings and beliefs about what constituted for sin and purification...you refused to see reason. To think you were in charge of executions and taking the lives of others in such a manner..."

"I...you..." Sasuke took a deep breath and seemed to straighten up a little more. "I can't help it. It's what I grew up believing and a part of me still agrees with some of the teachings of the Great Book. There are some sins that just can't go unpunished."

And yet even as he said this, he realized how..._insignificant_ it all seemed. If all sins were to go unpunished, where did that place him? Was his near-death experience enough to show that even God did not play favorites? That one day his own time would come, and while he might not go through the barbaric ritual of Gudan, his judgment would be just as swift as the executions he had performed in the past.

"How could I rescue someone who seemed content to be with Orochimaru?"

"I was not content!" Sasuke clipped back irritably.

"That was the impression I got from Asuma," Itachi replied quietly.

"Asuma knows nothing," came the low words and suddenly, just as quickly as the fight had appeared, Sasuke's shoulders sagged in weariness. "He doesn't know the half of it...everything I've had to deal with...he...he wouldn't understand..."

"Perhaps because you didn't give him a chance?" Itachi prodded gently. He knew he was going to have to break the news to Sasuke sooner or later, and would have rather had Shisui, with his bluntness, do the deed. "Asuma always felt you kept him at a distance even though he tried to be close to you."

Sasuke raised a brow and seemed to give a cynical smile. "He _was_ the closest to me...all things considered. Still...it doesn't explain why it took you this fucking long to want to see me again. We've had public Gudan showings all these years, you could have come then -"

"You, of all people, should know how Orochimaru works, Sasuke. If it was as easy as simply shooting him down with a sniper, we would have done that a long time ago...and we did try that believe me, but it only got us so far. He has managed to escape the many attempts made on his life, which is why his public appearances are now far and few between. Last time, he was smart enough to take you with him; knowing full well we couldn't attack without hurting you in the process. But perhaps I would have met you sooner if Ino's plan had come to fruition."

At the mention of the girl's name, Sasuke visibly started and felt a combination of heat and a chill sear down his spine. Memories of his time in that room (which now seemed like an eternity ago) and the bothersome nightmares he had with her voice in his head, had him moaning a little and raising a trembling hand to his forehead. Itachi gave a weak smile of sympathy.

"She told me of your plans to meet at the temple gardens where we would have been introduced formally...after she had broken the news to you of course. But as we both know...that didn't happen...by the time we could locate her whereabouts..."

His voice trailed off for he too remembered how distraught he had been at the sight of the barely recognizable body of the young woman with such a bright future ahead of her. In fact, he wouldn't have minded if Sasuke settled down with a person like her (especially after Asuma had shared the story of his baby brother finally becoming a 'man'). Ino had been a smart, funny, yet homely young woman.

"Shisui and I decided that the best way would be to fight from the outside in -"

"Wait...Shisui?" Sasuke looked up with bemusement. "Didn't you say he was dead?"

"Ah...yes," Itachi nodded softly. "I didn't mention that, did I? No...he wasn't dead after all. He was very much alive and well and had become a member of the organization about a year before I returned. He was the one who renamed the group to _Akatsuki_."

"But how did he survive?"

"He was captured...tortured...and given the opportunity to either kill himself or join their organization. He chose the latter and ended up becoming Danzo's personal hit man."

Sasuke shook his head. "He was Danzo's personal hit man...and yet he was with you guys? How did you know he wasn't a spy still working with Danzo? He could have been telling them all about your secrets."

Itachi gave a small smile. "I assumed the same thing too, though he was my best friend and I was overjoyed to see him still alive, but it was clear that he no longer had an allegiance to Danzo because his seal was gone."

"Seal?"

"Assassins of Danzo's Bakufu syndicate have special seals given to them. It's either a tattoo or a piercing on some part of the body. Shisui's had been a tattoo on his lower back, which he had removed in the presence of Yahiko when he decided he no longer wanted to work for Danzo."

"What made him change his mind?"

"He must have seen the light, who knows?" Itachi replied with a shrug. "Shisui still has his secrets even I can't yank out of him. All I know is that I was glad he was still alive and a part of us. He was and is quite beneficial."

"And Nagato...Konan...what happened to them? Are they still around?"

Itachi's lips thinned. "No...they were both murdered as well. Their bodies were filled with bullet holes with a bloody warning note left behind. They were on to us and were not going to rest until every last one of us was destroyed. We had no other choice but to remain in the shadows again for a while until everything had settled down. I was not about to take any rash chances and get you killed in the process especially if Orochimaru realized I was still alive."

"That didn't do much good," Sasuke replied with a sneer. "He still wanted to kill me in the end, didn't he?"

"And why all of a sudden?" Itachi mused. "It can only be because Danzo is getting impatient and needs you out of the picture and -"

The sudden loud sound of something being hit had him looking up quickly. Sasuke had formed a fist and pounded it into the wall beside him; his expression dark with his anger. He had had his theories about Danzo and Orochimaru's relationship, but now that everything was slowly falling into place, it made everything that had transpired that night and afterwards make even more sense. To think that he had been nothing but a goddamn pawn on a chess board...being moved around and maneuvered until one of them screamed 'checkmate!'

"I'm going to kill them both," he vowed beneath his breath. "Both of them...slowly...and with great pleasure. You have no intention of stopping me, do you?"

Itachi watched his brother with an expression that could be a mixture of amusement and sorrow, before lowering his lashes and shrugging lightly. "I couldn't stop you even if I wanted to, however...there is no way you can fight in your condition and with the situation volatile now, it's best that we take you away from that scene for a while until you are completely healed."

Sasuke raised a brow in confusion. "What are you talking about?" He glanced out the window and then back to his brother. "Who is 'we'? And where exactly are we going?" He had assumed they were only going to perhaps the next prefecture, but from the sound of things -

"'We' include you, Haku, Shikamaru, Naruto..."

At the mention of _that_ name, Sasuke felt something hard slam within his chest.

_Na...Naru...Naruto...? That...he...he's still **alive**?_

Not given enough time to digest this troubling information, and Itachi still concerned about how to break the news to his brother, he failed to see the blood drain from his younger brother's face as he continued quietly. "And we are going to Busan...you should be safe there. I have a friend who will take care of you until you are well enough to return to Japan. By then, we assume that things would have settled down a little..."

_Why is he still alive? Why is he...?_

/...I really don't like killing people.../

Sasuke could feel his head beginning to pound with a headache as those faintly echoed words ricocheted within his mind like a ping pong ball. Why the hell was he recalling this now? He had assumed that was all just a figment of his imagination, that the combination of smoke inhalation and the wounds he had suffered were making him hear things, that Uzumaki Naruto hadn't sat there like a fucking idiot spilling his life story to him as if they were really going to die and...and...

(you had felt a little sorry for him, hadn't you?)

/... And I'm sure deep down...you probably don't like sending people to Gudan or chopping their heads off.../

_Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!_

"Sasuke?"

"What?" he snapped in annoyance, more at Naruto's voice still bugging him than at his brother's concerned query. He took a deep breath and tried to calm down. "Sor...sorry, I just...I mean...I was thinking about something else..."

_Why the fuck is he still alive? This is going to be so goddamn embarrassing –_

"I know this is a lot to digest," Itachi said softly; unaware of his brother's chaotic inner turmoil. "And it makes what I'm going to say even harder still."

Sasuke gave Itachi a look of bemusement. "What else could you possibly tell me now that would make this night any more surreal? Goddamn it," he grumbled and ran his fingers through his hair; mussing it up even worse than it already was. "Where the fuck is Asuma anyway? I thought he'd be barging in here wanting to add his two cents to this."

"He isn't...here..." Itachi replied so quietly, Sasuke almost didn't hear anything especially with a particularly loud crash of the waves against the boat.

"What did you say?" he asked for clarification.

Itachi took a deep breath and forced himself to meet the dark eyes before him. "Asuma...he did not make it. He stayed...he stayed behind and...and..."

It took a lot to recount the story to Sasuke and even then, Itachi could still feel his heart grow heavier and heavier with each word he uttered. Sasuke, for his part, seemed frozen in place; not even daring to breathe and unaware of how pale he was becoming.

_Asuma was dead._

The one person who had made life a little more bearable all those years...dead. Gone. No longer alive.

"...it's a lie," he finally whispered even before Itachi could finish. He was shaking his head and muttering the words to himself as if hoping they would come true. "It's a lie. Just like your death was a lie. I'm sure Asuma survived. He'll come back. You'll see. I know he will. Nothing can kill him. Have you seen how huge that guy is? He -"

Something was suddenly tossed onto his lap, and Sasuke could only stare at the blood-stained rag with eyes that were now burning with unshed tears. He recognized the cloth; a silk scarf with the Sarutobi insignia which Asuma loved wearing around his obi. He was never seen without it for according to the big guy, it always brought him good luck. Now, it looked like it had literally been soaked in blood and the red-knitted kanji was barely visible.

"I managed to snatch that from his clothing while we were trying to escape," Itachi explained quietly; hating to add that he had not understood why he did so at the time, but he was sure that his subconscious had told him that it would be the last time he'd see his good friend and _senpai_ ever again.

"I'm sorry," Itachi was saying, though Sasuke could still see and hear nothing. There was this loud roaring in his ears; like the sound of a motor being revved up...louder and louder and louder until he felt he would go deaf with the noise. His eyes began to burn hotter still, but he could not get his hands to lift up to press against the lids to control the pain.

"Sasuke..."

"Leave..." His voice sounded distant. Like it was coming from miles away...not him speaking. It was someone else in his place; a shadow of Sasuke Uchiha. Whatever though. Nothing fucking mattered right now. Not this 'happy' reunion. Not that annoying Naruto. Nothing. "Leave me alone...please...I want...to be left alone..."

Itachi nodded in understanding as he rose to his feet. He had done the dirty work and now it was going to be left to Sasuke to try to come to terms with all he had laid on him today. He just sincerely hoped that Sasuke wouldn't let this eat at him for too long, though he tried to squash down the tiny part of him that felt jealous at the reaction. Itachi had to mentally slap himself for that. It was no one's fault, and Asuma hadn't wished to become Itachi or take his place. It was just the circumstances that had put them all into this mess and now...

(we have to do our best to move on)

"I'm..."

He was about to say he was sorry again, but looking at the bowed head and noticing how small and alone Sasuke looked at this moment, Itachi decided it would be bad timing and inappropriate. He settled for a soft nod and let himself out; almost sucking in gulps of fresh air once he was outside and felt he could breathe properly. He hadn't realized just how tensed he was through it all for a sharp pain in his shoulders suggested he was just that wound up.

"You told him?" came the quiet question from his right. Without turning to look, Itachi nodded wearily. He gazed out at the horizon where the first streaks of daybreak appeared in dark purples and blues.

"I just hope we're doing the right thing, Shisui," he finally muttered. He turned to the older man with a look of clear plea and desperation in his eyes, as if hoping Shisui would give him the answer he was looking for. "We are doing the right thing...aren't we?"

For a long minute, Shisui stared into the red-rimmed eyes and without saying a word, engulfed his childhood friend and partner in a crushing hug that spoke volumes.

Sometimes words were simply not needed.

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke: <em>

"You don't smile very much, do you?"

I looked up from the book I was reading and into the tallest human being I had ever met. To me, even a nineteen-year-old Asuma Sarutobi had looked like a giant. He hadn't grown his famous goatee yet, and those clean-shaven features had revealed the friendly and warm countenance I'd come to know and appreciate over the years. He was dressed in his training clothes for the dojo, a clear sign he was just coming from there because there was still sweat on his skin and the _shinai_ balanced on his left shoulder.

"Whatcha reading?" he queried, and like the sullen brat I was, I had simply shut the book and risen to my feet; not wanting to speak to this weird man. It wasn't as if I hadn't seen him before. After all, before the massacre, Asuma had come to our house once or twice to look for Sasuke since they were both in training to become watchdogs. I could still remember Father praising Asuma while looking at a list of new recruits. He was sure Asuma would end up becoming First Captain (an irony considering I ended up with the job after all).

Either way, my attitude did not stop Asuma from becoming a pain in the ass. He always seemed to know where I was whenever I wanted to be alone, and he'd sit beside me, yakking about things that were of no concern to me...though eventually I became intrigued, especially when he began to talk about his favorite T.V. shows and how he'd reenact each scene with the bad guys vs. the good guys. I thought he was annoying but still funny, and he finally 'broke' me when he showed up to my study session wearing the most ridiculous clown outfit and singing happy 8th birthday to me. I can tell you that my sensei had not found Asuma's intrusion funny, but then again, Asuma had argued that who spent time studying for hours on end when they ought to be outside having fun on their gosh darn birthday?

And as he dragged me outside and made us 'escape' from my furious instructor's wrath, I realized that it would be my first taste of 'freedom'; of breaking the rules and not caring what the consequences were. We ran all the way to the other end of Byaku-Shinkyou...toward the river, where Asuma had already prepared a little birthday party for me. It was nothing more than him teaching me how to fish for the first time, of me being overjoyed at having caught something (even if it was just a carp), roasting it and eating it with gusto. Nothing had ever tasted more delicious to me, and for the next few years, we'd make it a tradition to catch a fish on my birthday or a day after (if he was on assignment).

Asuma was as you saw him; unpretentious, honest to a fault, and a man who clearly loved life despite the circumstances that surrounded us. He always liked to see the good in people, though it confused me that hardened criminals were still 'human' in his eyes.

"We were not all born bad," he'd tell me while tendrils of smoke from his cigarette would filter into the night air as we lay on the roof of his apartment. "I think...that even the toughest and wickedest of criminals must have had something good happen in their life. Something makes us decide to be wicked; sometimes no fault of theirs. Sometimes they have to do really bad things to survive and as watchdogs, we have to try to see their humanity or we become what we fear most in others."

"What's that?"

"Evil."

"Oh."

"You don't want to grow up becoming evil, do you?"

I shook my head vigorously. "No...evil is terrible, isn't it? It's why we purge their sins...like Lord Orochimaru says. Gudan is a way to make them no longer evil when they get to heaven. Right?"

Asuma had sighed and shook his head. "Gudan is..." I was sure he was going to say evil, but he changed the subject instead and made us count the stars in the heavens, which I was sort of glad for. I always felt uncomfortable talking about my deeper foray into Lord Orochimaru's teachings. I felt Asuma would never understand how important my work was; of how I was becoming a vessel for justice and the truth. It was this segment of our relationship that perhaps made our relationship not all that close as Itachi had pointed out. It was because I always knew that deep down, Asuma never approved of that side of me. I wanted him to like the 'other' me, the part that wasn't so attached to Orochimaru's coattails. It was why I welcomed his company and looked forward to spending time with him especially after a long assignment away from Byaku-Shinkyou.

Of course looking back now, I realize that perhaps half of those 'assignments' were nothing more than him meeting up with my brother and his cohorts.

_He knew...and he never told me...always kept it a secret...he kept everything a fucking secret..._

And still I realized just how precarious a position he must have been in; knowing that everyday he left Byaku-Shinkyou to be with Itachi or even being with _me_, was a dangerous situation. In his own way, he had been the bridge between this reunion, and had worked in the shadows all these years to make it happen the best way he knew how.

I clutched the bloodied cloth to my chest and squeezed my eyes shut as that familiar booming laughter filled my ears and heart. He always did have such an infectious laugh, didn't he? Even if you didn't feel like cracking a smile, just listening to that damn guffaw would always have my lips twitching reluctantly. He could tell the lamest jokes and consider them the funniest things he had ever said. His singing voice was not that bad, but when he was drunk and too happy to stay in tune, he could make his listeners tone deaf with just how terrible he was.

Asuma enjoyed life and had wanted me to do the same, but...but...

(_I couldn't. I didn't want to_)

I moaned and curled into a fetal position with the blanket pulled over me; though this position only did more to make me aware of the aches and pains all over my body. I still suffered it in silence. After all...this was nothing compared to being shot by that damn bastard, Kimimaro.

_Him too...I'll kill him too...slowly...carve his fucking head and put it on a stick. Just for you, Asuma. I know you won't approve, but fuck it...fuck it...fuck it!_

Someone gave a harsh sob and seemed to drip hot water on my eyelids and cheeks...salty...as they fell into my lips and I tasted the bitterness within them.

It just wasn't fair, I thought sadly. For now I would forever live with the regret of not responding to his wave of hello on the morning of Gudan, since I was too busy being self-absorbed with my own problems. It was the last time I got to see him; my surrogate father and brother, who I now know I loved almost as much as I had loved my real brother.

_I'm so sorry for everything, Asuma. So damn sorry about everything…for not listening…for being such a stubborn asshole and not learning while I had the chance. So please…give me the strength to make the right decisions from now on. The least I can do is to make you damn proud of me..._

* * *

><p><em>Naruto:<em>

The unfinished sandwich sat limply between us as we leaned over the gunwale and continued to watch the waves crash gently against the boat's water-rusted sides. For the past half hour, we had said nothing to each other, simply allowing our silence to convey all that words could ever say. Shikamaru hadn't told me to get lost when I showed up, which was good. He had only given me a quick glance before focusing his attention on the horizon again; the cigarette's ember the only glow against the gloom of the darkness around us. I took that as a sign to join him and did so, not really exactly sure of where to begin to sympathize with the guy.

It was times like these that I wished I was more eloquent. I don't think I have enough vocabulary in my arsenal anyway.

He wasn't crying or anything; neither were there streaks on his face to show that he had shed a few tears, but his features were definitely the giveaway that all was not right with my friend. Those eyes looked sunken in and hollow within his pale features and there as a downward turn of his lips which hadn't been that noticeable before. There was a light stubble on his chin; a clear sign that he had not bothered to shave since the incident happened. At least he had changed into a new yukata since it was definitely different from the familiar drab gray ones all sinners had to wear in that damn place.

"It will be dawn soon," he stated in a voice that was devoid of emotion. He nodded toward the horizon where I could see streaks of purple and dark blue begin to break out against the sky. It was hauntingly beautiful and again, I felt the sting of tears fill my eyes. I couldn't remember the last time I had seen anything so...wonderful I guess. I just wish Asuma was here to see it with us. He'd probably crack some joke about it and make us laugh and...

"...probably crack some joke about it and make us laugh."

I jumped a little; at first wondering if I had spoken that out loud, but as I glanced at Shika, it was obvious he was the one who had spoken, and this time there was no mistaking the shimmer of tears within his eyes; though his gaze was still trained before him. I looked away so I wouldn't make him uncomfortable.

"Yeah..." I muttered and swallowed the lump that had risen to my throat. "He always had the corniest jokes, didn't he? He thought it was so damn funny and they sucked big time."

This – at least- brought a small smile to Shika's face, and I was glad for it. I really didn't like seeing him look so depressed. I know he had more history with Asuma and how close their relationship was, but still...

"Remember how he'd blow smoke rings with his pipe?" Shikamaru suddenly asked, and for the next few minutes, we reminisced on the things Asuma had done while we were together, and some things he had done while I wasn't with him. I guess Shika had to let it all out because he kept talking and talking and just wouldn't stop. Even when the tears did finally break free, he would only hitch in a soft breath and continue with some story about Asuma; of how the big guy had chosen to befriend him out of the many others he could have picked.

"He said...he said we were a...a...alike," Shikamaru stuttered. His hands were now gripping the edge of the gunwale so hard, they literally made his knuckles white against the gloom. "He said he...he...saw himself in me as a kid and...and...he couldn't even win one stupid lousy game of _Shogi_ with me!"

I really had no idea how one related to the other, but I chucked it up to the grief talking and before I could stop myself, wrapped my good arm around his shoulder to pull him closer to me. I fully expected him to push me aside, but was a little surprised (and pleased) he didn't. His sobs were quiet against my chest and though I wasn't aware I was doing this, I was caressing his head gently perhaps hoping my actions would show just how sorry I was and just how much I understood his grief.

It was soothing comforting him like this. So soothing in fact, that it took a sudden shake of my shoulder from someone to have me starting and looking around in mild panic before looking up to meet the dark eyes studying me warily.

"You were nodding off," the chick...Karin, right? That was what Itachi had called her. "You need to go back to bed. You are in no condition to be moving about so much."

Shikamaru must have heard her as well, because he pulled away from me and turned his face away as if embarrassed to show his tear-streaked face to a woman. Not that she seemed to give a shit, she was already motioning towards the section of my room with a wave of her hand.

"I'll be back in about five minutes to give you some pain killers, all right?"

"Eh...sure..." but I was talking to thin air as she was already stalking away without a look back. I snorted a little. "Why do I get the feeling she doesn't like me?"

"No one likes you," Shikamaru teased; his voice a little stronger and less sniffle-filled. He wiped his face with the sleeves of his yukata and took a deep breath. "But she's right though...you do look like shit. Go get some sleep. Shisui says we should be in Busan by noon or so."

_Eh?_

"Bu...Busan?" I blinked in confusion. Was that a new city in Japan or...?

"South Korea," Shikamaru explained with a small smile as he must have noticed my incredulous look. "I know...I was shocked too, but...hey...considering what's going on..." He shrugged lightly.

"What's going on? _What's going on?_" my voice was rising in panic. "What's all this got to do with me? I don't want to go to Busan! Who the hell do I know in Busan? At least drop me off at Nagasaki, no one is going to find me there!"

"Keep your voice down," Shikamaru hissed, but it was no good. Two fishermen, with their weathered and definitely non-Japanese faces, had poked their heads up from the cabins beneath and were peering at me warily, and from my periphery I could make out Haku, Shisui, and Itachi approaching. I wheeled around to confront them.

"Hey now," I began, hoping I could get through to the poker faces before me. "Look, I don't know what's going on with your situation and the whole hijack of that place, but it's really got nothing to do with me, right? I'm just an innocent...technically...bystander, so you can just drop me off at Nagasaki and I'll be out of your hair. Right? Right?"

"Not right," Shisui said with an aggravating smile. "You are in too deep now, Naruto...considering you are the son of Namikaze Minato. It's not surprising that Danzo would be after you if you dared step foot back into Japan."

"What?" I was confused and getting a damn headache. "I don't understand what the hell you're talking about. Son of Minato...that's my father I'm guessing."

"Don't you even know your father's name?" came the amazed question from Itachi.

"I told you...well maybe not, but I never knew my father," I replied tightly. This was really beginning to annoy me. "My mother never spoke about him much, and I was only a baby...just about when she died of some disease. I was practically an orphan!"

The older men exchanged looks and Shisui nodded first before turning back to me. "Figures...if the timeline is correct. I never knew your father personally. He was only a legend around the syndicate. All the same, word is he left around the time before you were born...you must be eighteen...nineteen...?"

"Nineteen."

Shisui snapped his fingers. "Right. All fits in nicely now. Your father left the syndicate around the time..."

"What? What syndicate?"

"Bakufu...surely you must have heard of them."

I could feel the blood draining from my features and if I wasn't already sitting down, I would have slumped back onto the wooden bench again.

Those Bakufu assholes! They were the ones responsible for this mess! If it wasn't for them threatening to take over my surrogate father's home, if it wasn't for them making me pay them every other week via Kojima and Ichimura, if it wasn't for them hunting me down after I had taken out their prized member, none of this would have happened! And then to now learn that my own father was a member of those bastards?

"Ha...haha...hahahahaha!"

I have no idea where the laughter came from, but there it was; loud and hysterical as I slapped my hand upon the bench and sent the plate of sandwich to the floor. This was just too funny. Too fucking ironic, wasn't it? So that was what Kojima must have meant after all. He must have known my father too and figured I'd be just as good as he was. Good ol' Dad...the syndicate legend!

The laughter turned into tears of bitterness, but I didn't care. I could vaguely hear Haku calling out my name in concern and perhaps I would have continue laughing like a fucking hyena if someone didn't pull me into his arms to console me. At first I thought it was Shikamaru returning the favor, but then realized that this person was standing and he smelled pretty different.

(kind…warm…strong…)

"It's okay to cry," came the soft voice within my hair. "I know this is hard for you to digest and understand, but that is the way life is sometimes."

What the fuck is he...is he...talking about? I wanted to rail at him to leave me alone, and yet I found my hands clutching the robes tightly and sobbing as hard as I never had before. Maybe it was all the stress of the past few days finally getting to me, and this was the release I finally needed. I just didn't think in a million years, I'd actually be using Sasuke's brother as my pillow.

...and I don't think he appreciated it either considering Shisui's sudden jovial greeting.

"Ah, look who's come to join us. Really, should be up and out of bed, Sasuke? You look dead on your feet."

His name was like a douse of cold water to my senses and maybe it was guilt, but even Itachi released me just as quickly as I did him. For starters, I didn't want it to seem like I was getting too chummy with his brother, and secondly, I most definitely didn't want him to see me crying like this. Call it a pride thing, but besides my 'confessions' in the dome - when I was sure he was passed out - there's no way in hell I wanted that guy to see this side of me. It was just the thing he could use against me if given the chance. I wiped my face quickly and dared to steal a peek from behind Itachi's back. Sasuke wasn't moving any closer to us, and it looked like he was leaning against the wall to steady himself. He had managed to throw on a yukata over his pair of shorts, though it wasn't tied well enough to prevent us from seeing the bandages wrapped around him especially his right thigh, and with Karin hovering in the background, I had a feeling she had tried to get him to remain in bed as well. To no avail as usual.

However, it was his expression that spoke volumes. If looks could kill, I'd be mince meat by now, but it still didn't deter from the way his eyes looked red – as if he had been crying – or the fact that his face was still slightly swollen (my punch during the fight probably) and he looked as pale as death itself. He was slightly out of breath too. Must have taken a humongous effort to get himself out of bed in the first place.

"I heard shouting," he explained with a final glare at me before turning it to his brother. "Sorry if I broke up your lovely moment there."

"Naruto's just as distraught as you are over Asuma's death," Itachi began, though it wasn't really the reason why I was all in a tizzy, but do you think Sasuke gave a damn? Hell no.

"He has no right to be distraught," came the icy retort that had even Shikamaru stiffening. "Why should he? Did he know Asuma like I did?"

Oh yeah, that's right. Of course Sasuke wouldn't know about our secret meetings, still...he didn't have to act like a goddamn bastard about it.

"Crocodile tears," Sasuke spat with such venom, I felt a chill go down my spine. "What do you know about grief besides wailing over your stupid girlfriend."

"Oh low blow there, you jerk!" I roared back before I could stop myself. I stood unsteadily to my feet, though Haku was torn between wanting to help me sit back down and wanting to help his master. "You keep my girlfriend out of this!"

"Your dead girlfriend you mean?" Sasuke sneered.

My hands formed tight fists. I was going to kill his motherfucker. I swear it! "Fuck...you..." I growled and took a step forward, but someone put out an arm to block my way. It was Shisui, and only because Itachi had moved forward so quickly, neither of us was able to notice it until the sudden **SMACK** sound filled the air.

Sasuke looked shocked and held his now stinging left cheek, where big brother had slapped. The deafening silence that descended on the boat was only broken by the sounds of seagulls now squawking into the early morning sky.

Whoa. Heavy.

"If you want to be upset with anyone," Itachi said quietly. "Take it out on me and on no one else, Sasuke. I know it seems like the world is in chaos right now, and I cannot imagine the grief you're going through, but Naruto has got his own problems to deal with, and you must try to recognize them as well. You are no longer within the walls of Byaku-Shinkyou...you are no longer under Orochimaru...he..." Itachi nodded toward me and Shikamaru. "...both of them...are human beings who have feelings just like you do. So from now on, you will have to begin to see them as such."

Sasuke, who was still looking as if he wanted to both murder his brother and burst into tears at the same time, finally settled for turning his head to the side to glare out at the sea. Perhaps if he frowned hard enough, the sea would begin boiling with his fury.

"Itachi's right," Shisui added. "Since when you get to Busan, you'll have to live in close proximity, and I can't...we can't be bothered to come running every damn time you both get into an argument." He glanced pointedly at Sasuke and I. I huffed and folded my arms across my chest before sitting down on knees that felt slightly wobbly. My heart was still racing, and I willed myself to relax lest I burst a blood vessel.

"Once we arrive in Busan, we'll take a bus to Buk-gu," Shisui continued when he was sure we both weren't going to glare each other down to death. "There I will introduce you to a friend who will be taking care of you two until you are healthy enough to return to Japan. By then we can only hope that the news has died down."

"What news?" Shikamaru asked.

Itachi sighed and buried his hands into the pockets of his robe. "It's been on the radio already. Orochimaru and Danzo had gone about 'denouncing' the attack as work of a terrorist organization. Luckily, our name was not mentioned, but you can be sure they will now double the effort to arrest and kill any member of our group if noticed. We have ordered all members to cease operations for the meantime, but Shisui and I will return to Hokkaido to do a little scouting and keep up with the situation. Shikamaru, I know you have a girlfriend back in Tokyo?"

Shikamaru nodded softly. "Yes...I don't want her to get involved with this though."

"Understood. We will get her to safety just in case Kimimaro gets his goons to go after her in retaliation."

"How bad was the damage to Byaku-Shinkyou?" Shikamaru asked, causing Sasuke to raise a brow in confusion.

"What happened?" he asked tightly. "What did you do?"

"Nothing much," Shisui replied with a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. "Our goal was to destroy all the new additions Orochimaru built since he came into power. Mostly the dungeons and the stadium itself. Your father would not have approved of such terrible constructions, would he?"

Sasuke gave a bitter smile. "Well? Did you succeed?"

"Half and half," Itachi replied with a light shrug. "They managed to put out the fires before it could do as much damage as we would have liked, but at least one thing's for sure...there won't be another Gudan happening anytime soon. That stadium is toast. Still...it's one of the main reasons why we needed to get you out of there this time around. You know the new Byaku-Shinkyou better than I do...better than even Asuma, right?"

Sasuke seemed to roll his eyes. "There's a fucking labyrinth beneath Byaku-Shinkyou. It would take years to find every damn secret hideaway in there."

Itachi seemed to pause and both brothers must have understood something because Sasuke shook his head lightly. "No...he hasn't found that place yet...I hope."

"I see...either way...do you think you could draw up a blueprint of what the underground labyrinth looks like while you're recovering?"

Sasuke looked ready to argue, but I piped up before I could stop myself. "I know some parts of it." All my days and nights of planning to burn the place anyway, I could draw the layout of the sinners' quarters to the East and West Blocks off the top of my head.

Itachi gave me a small smile of encouragement. "That's good, Naruto. Maybe you two could work together..." He stopped when he noticed our tangible body language and then sighed in resignation. "Or work separately and we'll look at the maps when we see each other again next time. Deal?"

"Deal," I replied with as much gusto as I could manage. Sasuke's response was a sullen silence that seemed to satisfy Itachi anyhow. I guess it was that brotherly instinct or some telepathic thing...

(like the weird one you have with Sasuke?)

Telepathy with that son-of-a-bitch? Don't think so, though a part of me was still grappling with just what had happened that moment during the battle royale. I glanced at him again while pretending to pick up my plate. He was frowning at his chest and rubbing the cheek where Itachi had slapped him, though Karin was trying to get his attention at the same time. I wasn't fast enough, because just as I thought I would look away, he chose that moment to lift his gaze and our damn eyes met again.

The first things to hit me were the words: _He knows._

I could feel my cheeks beginning to get hot.

_He knows._

The bastard _knows_ everything. He must have been awake when I was blubbering in the dome and that look in his eyes tells me that he's definitely going to hold that against me. Why else would he bring up Sakura in our little argument? His lips quirked a little in that smug, shit-eating smirk I now knew I would hate for the rest of my life. God, what I wouldn't do to smack it off right about now. Itachi's slap wasn't hard enough. With a haughty sniff, he finally allowed Karin to lead him back to his room, while Haku reached out to help me.

"It's okay, Haku," I reassured the poor guy when I noticed the worried look he gave to his master and the new chick doting on him. "I wouldn't worry too much about that girl taking your place. You are one of a kind and he'd be a fucking moron to not realize that."

"Thank you, Naruto-kun," Haku replied shyly, though twin spots of pink rose to his cheeks that made him look darn pretty as the sun began to rise a little past the horizon.

"Hold up," I said quickly as I made my way back to the gunwale to lean over it. "Let's watch this for a while, is that okay?"

Haku beamed and joined me...and even Shika, who now had a more relaxed expression on his visage. The three of us watched our first real sunrise in a while, and secretly – deep within our hearts – felt a warmth that could only come from knowing that the big guy with the big laugh was probably watching us right now and patting our heads with satisfaction.

Let's just hope he didn't bore the angels to death with his stupid jokes.

* * *

><p>The port city of Suyeong-gu was like a bout of nostalgia hitting me on all cylinders. It brought back memories of my days in Nagasaki, where the bustling sights and sounds of the small fishing town, made any day a memorable one. It was so good to see 'other' people besides the same ol' faces I had been stuck with during my incarceration. Compared to being trapped in drab gray clothes or looking at black uniforms, seeing the bright colorful clothing and boisterous sounds of the Korean people as they went about their daily business, was a sharp reminder of the rest of the world still in existence behind those thick walls of Byaku-Shinkyou. I was drunk on the smells of fish and fresh vegetables, gasoline and oil. Babies wailing while mothers haggled with fishmongers as husbands appraised the latest foreign goods to come ashore. Listening to the language was a bit weird at first, but it was easy to pick up on a few words here and there since I could speak Korean a little, thanks to living in a small Korean-heavy neighborhood during my travels.<p>

I wanted to get on land ASAP, but as per Itachi and Shisui's orders, we were to remain in the boat until they returned while they set about getting things ready for us. In the meantime, we were provided with new clothes and toiletries to clean up a little; a goddamn luxury after not enjoying the pleasures of soap and a good shave in a while. Though I wasn't spouting a beard yet, it still felt good to get rid of the whiskers that had appeared, and I cannot even begin to tell you how fucking goooood it felt to finally wash my damn hair after so long. I swear I got a boner just from scrubbing it with the shampoo, though it was a pain in the ass considering my arm was still hurting like a bitch every time I lifted it for too long.

I was happy to be back in western clothes again, and though the jeans was a little loose – having lost some weight since I was over there – the belt held it in place and a simple black t-shirt completed my wardrobe. It was weird to see Shika in western clothes as well, and he was dressed just like me...well besides he was wearing a plaid blue dress-shirt instead. We had a good chuckle as we looked at each other and how much we had changed with just a new clothes. Actually, the first time I got to see myself in a mirror, I was pretty shocked at how much my features had changed in the past six months. I did lose some weight yes, but there was something a little...hard...about my face now. I had been through hell and back after all, and though the physical scars weren't really there (besides the obvious bruises), what I had experienced in the depths of Byaku-Shinkyou would remain with me until the day I die.

One person who was not particularly happy with the new change, however, was Haku. He had all but whined and complained about having to wear the itchy pants and shirt, but after some major cajoling from yours truly, he finally caved and came out looking even more girly in his khaki pants and white dress shirt that was a little too big for him. He couldn't very well keep his hair (boy needed a haircut if you ask me), in that hairstyle with the bun at the top of his head, so Karin had suggested he just leave it in one big ponytail and be done with it. Haku spent the rest of the day squirming and tugging at the clothing as if wishing it would be ripped off. I wondered if they sold enough kimonos in Buk-gu, or he was going to drive me batshit crazy with what he was doing.

"Ah, Sasuke-sama is out," Haku announced, with childish giddiness, over the card game Shikamaru and I were playing to kill time. Though I didn't want to look (because I was sure Shika would cheat and I was holding the winning hand this time), curiosity had me turning my head all the same to see what Mr. High and Mighty looked like.

_Damn. _

It was the first time I was seeing him out of his uniform or a yukata and _Jesus fucking Christ_. Did he have to make a plain ol' pair of jeans and dress shirt look like he was modeling or something? God, I hate guys who manage to look good in any damn thing, and there was no doubt Mr. High and Mighty was pulling that off effortlessly. Karin, now his fucking shadow, was clinging on to his left arm, while he leaned on a crutch one of the fishermen had swiped offshore just for him. Hobbling along, he would have probably walked right past us without another look, if Haku hadn't opened his big mouth.

"Would you like to join us in a card game, Sasuke-sama?"

He finally turned his head a little to acknowledge or menial existence, and I could see that he too had managed to clean up as well. The shadows were gone, but there were still dark circles beneath his eyes and the remnant of my fist was still a lovely (but fading) memento on his jaw. His damn hair seemed to shine beneath the light, and it took me a second longer to realize that I was now staring directly into his eyes again.

Hell, even him seemed confused that I was staring at him so hard.

_Shit._

I growled and turned back to the game, nearly snapping at Shikamaru in annoyance. "Your move."

"Sasuke-sama? Do you want to -"

"He's not playing with us," I interrupted coldly. "The game's already started anyway. No more room."

I could feel both Shikamaru and Haku looking at me then at each other in confusion considering there was plenty of room all around us and my statement had made no sense. However, I was in no mood to make any sense, and was glad to find myself breathing a little easier when Sasuke finally hobbled away with something that sounded eerily like "stupid idiot" beneath his breath.

Well fuck him too.

"I win!" Shika announced as he slammed down his cards to show me a straight flush. I sagged my shoulders in defeat. Pfft. The story of my fucking life.

"Another round?" Haku asked, though he kept watching over his shoulder at his precious Sasuke-sama, until we all heard Sasuke's irritated "I said I'm fine already. Don't you have anything better to do?"

Man, what a ...

"We're back!" came the happiest sound in the world or God knows I would have had a word or two with Mr. Too-Good-For-Anyone-Else. Itachi and Shisui were coming on board with loads of stuff, which they began revealing once we were in the safety of the captain's cabin. It was big enough to hold all of us which was good.

"Here are your new ID cards and immigration documentation," Itachi said as he passed around the sheets of papers. I gawked at the piece of plastic that had my face on it (Shisui had taken pictures of all us earlier) with its unpronounceable name.

_Kim...Jung...Junghy...Junghyun? Wha...?_

"As you might have noticed," Shisui was saying, "You now have Korean names, which you must use when in public. Our hope is that you never have to provide documentation to the authorities, which means you have to stay out of trouble while you are here."

"We also have some pocket money for you," Itachi added as he passed along envelopes that felt heavy with cash. "Use it to buy yourselves new clothes, food, whatever is needed. Do not worry about the rent in your new home as our friend will be taking care of it. You are welcome to get a job -"

"Wait a minute," Sasuke chimed in. "Just how long are we staying here? You're making it sound like we're going to be here for..._years_."

Yeah, even I'm wondering that. I'm not sure I like the idea of living close to this guy for a day, let alone having to suffer through years of being neighbors (or God forbid, roommates). I shuddered.

Shisui shrugged. "Again, it all depends on what happens over there and how fast you heal. For now, you are safe here and away from prying eyes. You both have appointments first thing tomorrow morning with a doctor who is a member of the organization, so your wounds and injuries can be taken care of properly." He nodded toward the exit. "There's a mini-bus waiting on shore for all of you, and you should be able to get to Buk-gu in about two or three hours. It's not that far from here. We should..."

A sudden knock on the door had us all stiffening in wariness and panic, and I realized dully that this was the way my life was going to be from now on. Until Orochimaru and Danzo were dead (or hell even the Bakufu Syndicate was eradicated), I was always going to have to keep looking over my damn shoulder. I was beginning to wonder if being stuck behind those walls wasn't better...

"What's wrong?" Itachi asked as the door opened to reveal the face of one of the fishermen.

"You might want to turn on the T.V.," the man said, with his thick accent, as he pointed towards the small 17' television sitting at the corner of the room. Shikamaru leaned over to do as he suggested, and we all sat dumbfounded and frozen as _the face_...that familiar pale face I had come to loathe filled the screen and spoke to the entire world:

"_...destroyed the very foundation of liberty, freedom, and justice in Japan. It pains my heart, and the hearts of the Japanese people, that so many innocent lives had to be sacrificed for the sake of one blood-thirsty organization's need for power. But I can assure you, my fellow people, that the spirit of Byaku-Shinkyou will not be destroyed by these wicked sinners who trample all over what we stand for. We vow to continue to seek out these terrorists and to purge them from this earth in a manner fitting for such heavy and terrible sins. Byaku-Shinkyou will be rebuilt in the memory of the last heir of the Uchiha clan, a young man who was unfortunately taken away from us before his time. In your name, Uchiha Sasuke, I will continue your unquenchable thirst for justice and truth."_

And with those snake-like eyes piercing and golden with its intensity, he finished with the ominous words that sent a chill down my spine:

"_And, trust me, I will not rest until I have found each and every one of you." _


	18. 18: Acclimation

Big, big thanks to SilverSauce, Amanda (so glad my story was the first you've read in the fandom!), airi1285, Opalynne, and ThroughDarknessandLight! I'm really glad you enjoyed the chapter. *bows gratefully* I forgot to mention this in the other chapter because someone asked about their ages on the other site I post this one. So here it is: Asuma (32), Shisui (26), Itachi (24), Shikamaru (20), Sasuke and Naruto (19), Haku (18). Obviously, I'm not exactly going with the actual ages in the manga, so you don't have to scratch your head that much. *lol* But onward and upward. Here's the new chapter, which I hope you'll enjoy! Normalcy for our boys? Say it ain't so! *panics*

**PS:** Again, and as mentioned in the beginning of this story, if you notice typos, please pardon me. I really try to go through to look for any odd word here and there, and I don't always catch all of them. You do not want to know how much I cringe when I'm done uploading it and then see all the errors littered here and there. Gah. Drives me nuts. Ah well...as long as most of it makes sense, I'll get to editing AGAIN much, much later.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 18: <strong>

**Acclimation**

_If I should live long,  
>Then perhaps the present days<br>May be dear to me,  
>Just as past time filled with grief<em>

_Comes quietly back in thought._

_-Fujiwara no Kiyosuke_

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke: <em>

I was watching my funeral..._literally_.

Full of pomp and circumstance, Orochimaru had spared no expense making it seem as if he had lost something so…_precious_ to him. It was eerie; a downright out of body experience to see a large blown-up photograph of myself stuck amidst a gazillion flowers. I fully expected to see my coffin with an imposter's body inside, but luckily, we were spared from that gruesome concept. I could only watch in horrified and disgusted silence as he made a show of bowing before my image, while flanked by several officers (many of whom I recognized as my subordinates) before swishing aside in his flowing black robe to allow a steady stream of mourners (dressed in black as well) to walk past; many of whom left even more flowers, incense or an offering in my honor.

_Insane…this is insane…_

I was being martyred.

That sick son-of-a-bitch was actually using me - even in 'death' - to pull off the next phase of his diabolical plans. I couldn't believe it! The intense desire to reach into the television screen, to wrap my hands around that pale neck and slowly squeeze the life out of him, had my fingers itching so much so, I practically had to clench them into fists to control myself. I longed to scream to the heavens, or rather to the innocent fools who were falling for Orochimaru's trap; to tell them that I was still alive and well and that all of this was just a ploy to finish what he had started. I wanted to -

"That is one nice funeral," came the sudden low drawl from across the room, which broke off my dark thoughts. "Not every day you get to see what that looks like, eh, Sasuke?"

I bristled; wondering if he expected me to respond to that inane observation, but I guess not since he continued with a hard edge now in his voice. "Have to give the guy props for pulling this shit. One minute he's threatening to have us all killed, the next he's acting like he just lost his best buddy in the world."

Naruto snorted in derision and pointed at the screen with his finger. "What's he trying to do anyhow?"

"It's obvious," Itachi replied quietly, causing me to glance at him. His expression gave nothing away, but it was clear from the slight tremble in his tone that he was not exactly too thrilled with what he was seeing either. "With Sasuke now 'dead', it gives him free reign to hunt you down and really finish the job without the rest of the world's knowledge."

"So he knows we're alive then," Haku stated softly; though he looked worried. I had to squash down the sudden urge to comfort him for he looked a bit lost and bemused. I have to confess that it was 'strange' to see Haku look this way; not his expression per se, but stuck in western clothing and looking quite out-of-place compared to the others. If it (slightly) annoyed me that he was getting more and more attached to Naruto (I doubt he's bothered to see me throughout the boat trip), I swallowed it and blamed it all on that girl who seemed intent on smothering my personal space.

"Not surprising," Shisui replied with a light shrug. The images on screen had now changed to what looked like the outside of a hospital. There was another press conference being held; this time a group of doctors giving an update on Shimura Danzo's condition. "Kimimaro must have told him we made it out alive."

"…where the Commissioner is still being treated for a gunshot wound to his right shoulder," the pretty brunette reporter was saying. "The doctors have just wrapped up a quick news conference and say that they expect him to be released soon, but that they fear his arm will remain permanently paralyzed…"

"Looks like you did some major damage," Shisui remarked with a low whistle of appreciation while glancing at my brother.

"Not bad enough," was Itachi's low reply, and it took all my of my acting skills not to show the surge of pride that filled me at that statement. I know it sounds stupid and cliché, but it really is funny that despite all the years separated, despite just seeing and being with him for barely an entire day, and despite getting a nice reminder of who was actually in charge (see my still stinging cheek as reference), Itachi was still _cool_ to me. He was still the big brother who would always take care of me when things got rough. He could be nice and kind to a fault (reference to his need to comfort Naruto for reasons beyond me), but deep down inside, he wouldn't hesitate to use force if necessary, and I was sure he was definitely pissed at not having finished the job when it came to assassinating that hypocrite.

"We're definitely going to have to move more cautiously from now on," he muttered to himself.

"Well, sitting around here isn't going to do us any good," Shisui said impatiently. Why did I get the feeling that he was actually the brains behind the operation? "We have to get moving, Itachi."

"Right." My brother turned off the T.V. (thank God for small mercies) and focused on us again. "As I mentioned earlier, there's a bus waiting to take us to Buk-gu. Shisui and I will only stay for a day or so, just so you can acclimate to your new surroundings before heading back to Japan…"

I opened my mouth to blurt out a plaintive _'why'_? Why did he have to go back now especially after our reunion? There were still some things I wanted to ask him...to share with him, and he was so quick to run away again; though I knew his reasons for doing so. All the same, I was going to be in a foreign land…away from the once safe confines of my home, and thrust into a situation I was not going to be comfortable with. Everything I knew and owned was left behind, and I was already beginning to have horrible flashbacks of the last time I left Byaku-Shinkyou for a significant amount of time and what had transpired then.

_Relax...there's no Orochimaru here anymore, remember? He is no longer watching over your shoulder so...try to relax...breathe..._

Either way, my eyes were still suffering the effects of the smoke; a dull burning sensation that had worsened with my cry-fest over Asuma's death. I did not have my medication with me either, and I was sure that my vision was going to be affected. How the hell was I going to see at this rate? By the time my brother returned (if he returns that is), I might be completely blind. And not for the first time in my life, I cursed the fate that destined me with such a 'gift'.

"...speak the language?" Itachi was asking, forcing me back into the conversation.

"A little," Naruto (ever the show off) said with a wave of his hand. "I lived in Korea town for a while and picked up a few things here and there. Should be no problem...I hope."

"Good. Shikamaru?"

"A little bit," came the quiet reply. Funny, I have never really noticed him before although I'm sure I must have seen him once or twice around the grounds or with Asuma at some point in time, but other than that, I had no idea why this particular sinner...

(his name is Shikamaru)

...was with us on this journey, and why my brother and everyone else seemed quite comfortable with him.

"Haku?"

"Sasuke-sama taught me a few simple sentences," Haku replied with a warm smile thrown my way. I kicked myself inwardly for feeling my cheeks heat up a little, especially with everyone now looking my way. But Haku, who still has a problem with controlling his mouth when he gets going, kept on going. "Sasuke-sama knows how to speak five different languages and he's very good at them too! Japanese, Korean, Chinese, English, and French. I think he was even learning Russian too..."

"Haku," I growled beneath my breath. Normally, I'd be puffing up with pride at my accolades, but seeing the expression on Naruto's face (a mixture of amusement and disgust?) made me feel a little embarrassed at being called out for being too much of a bookworm. At least if there was one thing I could be thankful for, it was Orochimaru's need for me to learn as much as I could with the teachers he specifically chose to tutor me.

/One must always keep the mind active, Sasuke. Remember, knowledge is power. /

_Hmph. Like I needed **you** to tell me that, you bas –_

"Well then, maybe Sasuke-sama should teach all of us, since he's such a master of the languages, eh?" Naruto drawled sarcastically.

Unfortunately, Haku didn't get it and all but clapped his hands in delight. "I think that's a wonderful idea. I'm sure Sasuke-sama wouldn't mind."

He looked at me with hope and pure adoration in his eyes, and I swear I hadn't meant to say this, but it came out anyway. "It's fine...except that some people might find it a little more difficult to grasp whatever lessons I impart due to their slow mentality." This said while glaring pointedly at Naruto. Guess I hit a nerve because his eyes immediately flashed with an expression that I found myself welcoming and feeling quite (oddly) comfortable with. His anger and irritation I could deal with. I had no intention of becoming friends with him no matter the situation thrust at us.

"Slow mentality or not," came the curt interruption from Itachi, just as Naruto was about to open his mouth to probably insult me. "It's good that you all know a little of the language. Not many Japanese are around the location we're going to, so you might as well try to get used to the people and their way of life as quickly as possible. Naruto?"

"What?"

"If I can force you away from homicidal thoughts regarding my obstinate little brother, for just one minute, here's a little something for you. I'd advice to apply them immediately."

A small box was thrust the blond's way, and he opened it to reveal a pair of contact lenses.

"Nice," he muttered. "I used to wear these a lot before...you know." He gave a smile that was hard to decipher, but lowered his head to fix them in, then threw it back to make sure they fit. After several blinks to adjust to them, he lifted his lashes to reveal hazel eyes that somehow...

(don't fit you...it's not you...I prefer to see the real ones...)

...made him look a little different.

"What about my hair?" he asked, while running his fingers through it and making it even spikier than it was. "Got any wigs?"

"Don't think you'll need them," Shisui replied with an amused smile. "There are other blonds around. Think it's a new trend with the youth these days."

A sudden loud knock on the door – which immediately had us all stiffening and turning at the same time toward it - revealed another weathered face of a fisherman we had not seen before. He nodded towards my brother and asked curtly, "_Kahl gah yo_?"

"_Yeh," _Itachi replied immediately in fluent Hangul._ "Kahm sa hahm ni da._"

Impressive...not that it should have been surprising with the kind of life he's led all this time. With an exchange of polite bows, Itachi and Shisui began to usher everyone out with instructions on getting directly into the bus and not stopping for anything and -

"You stay," Shisui commanded curtly as I began to hobble after the others.

I frowned in consternation; leaning heavily on my crutch (God, I hated walking around like an old man). "What is it?" I asked rudely.

Itachi, who was making a show of packing up the rest of the documents, which were not distributed, stopped long enough to reply once he was sure everyone else was out of the room. "Your eyes. How do they feel?"

I blinked and then squeezed them shut for a second before lifting my lashes again. "They still burn a little. Must be from the smoke and all..."

"Asuma mentioned that Orochimaru was giving you some kind of medication to control them," Shisui said quietly; his gaze was searching and penetrating, and I almost felt he was stripping me down...wanting to see beyond what was presented to him. It was disconcerting to say the least.

"Asuma talked too much," I grumbled and took a step back because Shisui was coming closer still. What was his problem?

"He just wants to look at them properly," Itachi explained with a small smile. "Orochimaru's so-called medication must have really fucked up your eyes. Surely even you must have realized what he was doing."

Yes, I did know, but I didn't need them to make it seem like I was _that_ stupid. I opened my mouth to retort but Itachi wasn't done yet.

"Shisui has something to reverse the effects."

Shisui smiled and reached into his robe to pull out a small vial, which he waved a little. "However, you might have to wear sunglasses for a while -"

"How long is a while?"

"Twenty-four hours, give or take."

"And what is this going to do exactly?"

"Stops the burning for one thing," Shisui stated as he walked to a nearby sink to wash his hands, while Itachi was clearing the small table before patting it lightly. "Secondly, you won't feel like plucking them out whenever you see people that are 'evil'. Orochimaru made you overuse them and his medication only enhanced the effects. Besides, the world is so full of evil anyway, if you kept seeing every single person's aura like that...you won't last a week on the outside." He wiped his hands on a rag and pointed to the table. "Lay on it, so I can get started."

"Wha...?"

"Just do as he says," Itachi remarked with a weak smile. "It will be over quickly." And perhaps sensing my 'other' concern, he whispered into my ear as he had always done when we were children. "It won't hurt a bit. Just think of Mama Tae's melons."

The snort of laughter escaped my lips before I could stop it. Itachi's soft chuckle as he pulled away even had Shisui eyeing us with a raised brow. It was something between brothers, he reckoned as I obediently lay back (with an effort and trying not to wince at my other aches and pains). What were Mama Tae's melons? Well, though shameful to admit, as a child, I never really liked paying visits to our family doctor especially when he had a penchant for giving me shots like it was going out of style. I hated receiving such injections, and it was always Itachi who would hold my hand and try to make me think of something else to keep my mind off the incoming prick of pain. Mama Tae's melons were not actual melons at all, but a woman who was quite... let's just say she was very well-endowed in the bosom and backside department. Whenever she walked, it was like watching rolls of fat waddle down the street, and she didn't seem to mind that we children literally ogled at her in awe (she must have been about six feet tall with a face like that of a mashed frog wearing garish make-up). It didn't help that she wasn't the most cheerful of people, that she smoked like a chimney, and she would literally growl at anyone who sneaked into her compound.

Knowing that she was no longer alive made it all seem bittersweet, but it was still a nice memory and a part of me was glad Itachi had brought it up. Still, Shisui had no needle in his hands and seemed to know what the hell he was doing. He hummed to himself as he tinkered around with the medium-sized black box I had noticed him carrying earlier, and before long, I felt my eyes literally widened and taped down by some kind of material to expose more of my corneas. It was like being forced to see the world in even broader vision; quite an uncomfortable feeling, I can assure you.

All the same, I remained as still as I could; though my hands were gripping the edges of the table tightly. They eventually began to water and the tears ran down my cheeks, which Shisui would dab away absently as he carefully began applying drops of whatever was in the vial into the corner of my eyes. The effect was immediate: a sharp sting that nearly had me jerking off the table before it passed to be replaced with a coolness – as if someone was blowing a soothing wind into them. Problem was, I was literally crying now – no fault of mine – it was probably the effect of the drug, and as before Shisui wiped them away diligently.

"Oy! What's keeping us?" came the sudden cry from the outside that was a jarring reminder of exactly where we were. Trust that idiot to be the one to scream like a barbarian.

"Shut him up," Shisui ordered dryly. He was applying another drop of the medication, and I could vaguely hear Itachi leaving to perhaps tell them I was getting a crude eye operation.

Five more times of this procedure and Shisui finally seemed satisfied. With a light grunt, he finally took off the tapes and made me squeeze my eyes for about a minute, while helping me sit up.

"It's going to burn for a little while," he explained even as said sensation began to take effect. It wasn't too bad, but it wasn't exactly a tolerable feeling either. "But like I said, give it about twenty-four hours and you should be back to normal. Everything's going to look a little cloudy meanwhile, but try to bear with it as much as possible, okay?"

And hardly waiting for me to respond, he yelled out to the rest, "We're finished here!"

"Thank God!" came the now all too familiar voice. "Because I'm starving, goddamn it! When are we going to eat?"

I groaned and ignored the snicker from Shisui as he passed the sunglasses to me, which I slid on and squinted through.

God help and give me the patience to deal with this. It wasn't even the end of the first day of my new life away from Byaku-Shinkyou, and I already had the feeling this transition was going to be a long and painful one.

* * *

><p>"Are you going to finish that, Haku?" came the pleawhine from across the table.

"Uumm...well...no..."

"_Koh mahp soom ni da!"_ Naruto yelled in victory before swiping the last piece of grilled fish off Haku's plate with his chopsticks.

"You eat too damn much, Naruto," Karin complained. "Isn't that your fifth helping already?"

_Third actually,_ I corrected absently (not that I'm keeping track) as I stirred the floating noodles in my bowl, while the delicious smells of samgyeopsal (pork belly meat) being grilled on a hot plate assailed my senses. Shisui was doing the honors of turning the meat over so they wouldn't char, while Itachi seemed to be in a dazed stupor (or asleep) as he leaned back on his seat...not speaking much.

"Stop it!" came the sharp bark from the girl as she tapped Naruto's wandering hand with her chopsticks earning a giggle from Haku, a cry of 'pain' from Naruto, and Shikamaru chuckling into his meal.

_This is..._

"But Karin-chaaaaan -"

"I am not Karin-chaaaaaan. It's just Karin. Can't you even get that right?"

_This is..._

"More Itachi?" Shisui asked as he held up a slice of the pork. My brother shook his head and took another sip of his beverage; making me wonder if he was getting drunk. That would be a first.

_This is..._

(like old times)

_...strange._

Talking...laughing...enjoying a full course meal with people who weren't really afraid of you. Acting like nothing was wrong, when less than a hundred miles away, a homicidal maniac was in the hunt for our heads. Asuma would have loved this setting and would have relished it with much gusto. I felt the back of my eyes prick with unshed tears. He should have been here...with us.

I scooped some more noodles into my mouth, having to chew carefully because my jaw was still smarting, and besides, I do take my time to savor a meal anyway (well unless I had a duty to attend and was forced to eat fast). Still, it gave me the time to survey our surroundings. Thanks to Naruto's constant whining about being hungry, Itachi was finally forced to stop at a nearby restaurant which specialized in seafood (obviously) and whose owners were quite welcoming and accommodating to the 'foreigners'.

Luckily, the chef was quite fluent in Japanese, and we (by 'we', I mean Itachi and Shisui) were able to converse for a while before he presented us with the best they had to offer. Our small party occupied a section of the almost claustrophobic eatery, and though we got a few wary glances from some patrons, it really was no different from any other restaurant you might see back home (at least the few that were in Kanei that is). From our vantage point, we could see the chef, his wife and two children working hard behind the counter either cooking, washing dishes or serving their customers. They seemed to know all their customers by name, and would engage in a loud conversation if prodded to do so. All in all, it was a rather cozy atmosphere.

However, something I could not ignore...or rather, something I had noticed before and which only became more obvious as the evening wore on, was a certain man's ability to attract everyone's attention. It was akin to watching a human magnet in action; to see how he effortlessly started up conversation with strangers and in mere minutes, they were either warming up to him or becoming friendly –as if they had known him all their lives. Even Karin, who at first wouldn't give him a second look, was now forced to acknowledge his presence and from the flush on her cheeks, it was clear he was having his effect on her. I couldn't and didn't understand it.

Or maybe I did.

It was that 'thing' I had seen in him on that day I passed his judgment; that 'light' that told of a heart that was inherently good despite his outward behavior or attitude. People like Naruto were indeed a rarity; individuals who tried to see the decency in others even at the expense of getting hurt in return. Perhaps that was why his girlfriend was killed? I wracked my brain to remember the contents of his file while piecing together his 'confession' in the dome. It didn't make sense that he would be so willing to forgive a woman who must have been having an affair with the man he killed. Wasn't that what happened? Hadn't Naruto said he ended up killing the man who had shot his girlfriend in cold blood before his eyes? The report had stated both bodies were in the room...both naked...which could only mean...

"Meanie!" Naruto wailed out in mock agony as Shisui had smacked his hand away from trying to steal an extra piece of meat from the grill. "I only had one!"

"The last is for Sasuke," Shisui explained as he motioned his head toward me.

"But he's still stuck with his bowl of noodles," Naruto said with a raised brow as he looked at me. "Guy eats so fucking slow, we'll be here until tomorrow morning and he'll still be half-way done."

"At least I don't eat like a gluttonous monkey," I retorted, wishing I could control my natural reaction to prickle whenever he attacked me unnecessarily.

"Better a gluttonous monkey than a giiiirl who eats so slooooowly." He proceeded to mimic my eating motion while batting his lashes and trying to act feminine. This got the others laughing, even Itachi cracking a smile at the impersonation. I burned at the insinuation; realizing this was the second (or was it third time?) he was referring to me as a goddamn 'girl'.

"Ah, be nice, Naruto," Karin said with a playful nudge of the blond's side. They were sitting beside each other, by the way, with Shikamaru flanking his left. Haku was next to me, he was next to Shisui and him, next to my brother. It was a large round table and everyone was in close proximity, so I really only had to reach over the table to throttle that bastard –

"I am nice," Naruto complained and then pouted. "It's just that some people tend to rub me the wrong way...that's all."

His quick glance at me spoke volumes, before he turned away to engage Karin's attention again. "How the hell did a beautiful babe like you get mixed up with these folks by the way?" He waved a hand at Itachi and Shisui.

Shisui raised a brow. Itachi – who had been dozing off again – lifted his lashes wearily. Karin gave the men a quick look as if seeking their permission to begin speaking, and they must have said 'yes' (though not aloud) because she cleared her throat, put down her chopsticks and began to speak quietly but clearly.

"Growing up, I only had one goal and dream in mind...and that was to become the first female watchdog in all of Japan."

"But there are no female watchdogs -"

"Dumbass. She just said she wanted to be the first, Naruto. She knows there are no female officers," Shikamaru stated with a light tap on Naruto's head. "Let the girl talk."

"Anyway, as you pointed out, there was no way for me to get enrolled in the academy because I was a girl, neither would they accept my application to Byaku-Shinkyou because...well...you guessed it. Hell, I even contemplated pretending to be a boy just so I could get in, but when I really thought about it, I guessed it wouldn't be worth it."

"Trust me, you were better off. With the kind of officers they have there...," Naruto nodded sagely and this time it was a painful kick under the table that had him howling in pain. "Who did that?" he asked as he glared at all of us. I carefully slid my good foot back into position. Served him right.

Karin continued as if he hadn't spoken. "So I decided to do the next best thing. I enrolled in the new military service school that was opened by Commissioner Danzo. He touted it as the next best thing to breed strong men and women to serve their country." This part she did as if making an announcement by deepening her voice and puffing out her chest. Going back to her normal voice, she spoke on. "I signed up as quickly as the announcement was made and prepared to go into a lifetime of service. I might not end up being a watchdog, but I was damn well determined to become someone useful in society." She sighed and propped her chin on a raised arm. "Funny, turns out that we had to do some kind of aptitude test and based on that, they'd put you in a specific department to hone your skills. I was good at thinking pretty quickly and being good with my hands, but that's only because my parents were in the medical field and I learned a couple of things from them here and there. Anyhoo, the authorities said I'd be best working as a nurse...a nurse!" She spat out the word as if it was a disease. "It was a slap to the face I tell you..."

"But being a nurse is quite important," Haku said with a warm smile as if to appease the girl. "If the fighters get hurt, who's going to take care of them and make them all better?"

"True, true," Naruto agreed. "Without you guys, we'd be dead! You're the key to keeping a good...eh...uum..."

"...squad," I offered with a sigh of exasperation after another minute of Naruto struggling to find the right word. I didn't expect to get a 'thank you' for my answer, and I wasn't disappointed. He only nodded and turned back to Karin.

"What Slow Poke said."

She gave me a smile that was supposed to be filled with gratitude, though I had really said nothing to warrant the action. "Thank you. I guess now I realize it, but back then, I was so mad that they were not taking me seriously. They would make us learn all these medical battle skills; how to dodge incoming attacks and get to patients quickly...treat them without getting your head blown off or stabbed in the process and all of that. It was exhausting, but not exactly what I had hoped for either. That was when Ino and I decided we would leave the school and set our own path..."

The clatter of something falling had everyone looking in my direction, and it was then that I realized I was the one responsible for the noise. My chopsticks had slid from my fingers at the mention of 'Ino'. Had Karin really said that or was that a slip of her tongue?

"Is everything all right, Sasuke-sama?" Haku asked with concern.

"You..." I cleared my throat (word had come out sounding so thick) "You mentioned...Ino...?"

Karin lowered her lashes, and I knew then it wasn't a mistake. She did mean that Ino..._my_ Ino...the one Orochimaru had taken away from me.

"She was a medic like me," Karin explained softly. "We were both classmates and left at the same time. She was actually the one who introduced me to your brother; saying she had joined a group of activists who were intent on dealing with corrupt politicians and bringing justice to those who were downtrodden. At first I thought she was simply hallucinating and making up stories, but at that meeting...when I got to see Itachi and Shisui for the first time...I knew this was a place I could make a big difference. They didn't treat us like mere tools, but made us all feel like we were doing something important and beneficial for society. We wanted to restore Japan back to its glory days, and we were all united in that one goal." She lowered her head even more and this time we could barely hear her words. "I still can't believe she's gone..."

"Did you know her?" came the sudden question obviously directed at me. It was Naruto doing the query, and though a part of me wanted to deny it, I could see them all waiting for my response. Even the older men seemed to want to know whether I'd finally admit my relationship with her.

"...yes..."

"How is that possible?" Naruto asked again in genuine bemusement. "Was she a childhood friend or...?"

"She was my lo..." I began angrily, but held back my words as Haku's eyes widened and even 'slow' Naruto seemed to finally get it.

"She was your _girlfriend_?" he blurted out in a way that made my entire being flush with heat. "Wow...and here I thought..."

"Thought what?" I snapped; waiting for him to say it...to suggest that...

"Weeeeeell, with you being with Snake Dude and all..."

_That's it!_

"Relax, Sasuke," Itachi drawled as he reached out to push me back to my seat. "You know he's just teasing you."

"He is trying to insinuate that I...that I'm...I'm..." I couldn't even finish the words.

"And what's wrong with that?" came the surprising response that had me blinking stupidly behind my sunglasses. Itachi was clearly drunk. That had to be it. Why else would he ask me such an incomprehensible question? "There's a whole new world out here, Sasuke. You're definitely going to meet people like that."

"I know those kinds of people exist. I lived with Orochimaru for fourteen years, _remember_?" I replied with as much sarcasm as I could inject into the word.

His visible wince signified that I had hit a sore spot, and he settled back in his seat with a sigh. With an effort, I sat back as well, though my food was now forgotten as I stared pointedly at Naruto; daring him to continue with his false accusation. Of course hell would freeze over before I admitted that I had fallen by the wayside on the night I had thought of him when..._that_ happened.

"Well where is she now?" he asked with a raised brow. "I mean...if you two are both a couple or whatever. Does she know you're still alive?"

"She's dead," I stated flatly; my words descending into the stunned silence like an anvil. I felt a strange calmness come over me; not a soothing one per se, but a strange feeling of detachment, as if it was someone else speaking and telling them about the loss of the one female (besides the mother) who had known me intimately. I looked directly at Naruto; wanting to hold those hazel eyes prisoner as I said the next words. "Orochimaru had her killed. But not just a merciful death...he ruined her completely."

"Sasuke..." Someone called out gently to me, but I couldn't stop. I _wanted_ Naruto to understand...to see that perhaps I could relate to the pain he went through while he watched his woman die.

"She was raped, probably several times over until she was unconscious, and when she came to, she was whipped and flogged until the skin of her back was ripped to shreds. Oh, as if that wasn't bad enough, they beat her all over; you could barely see her face anymore. They broke her arms and her legs and when they felt they had done enough damage, they tossed her body into a garbage bag and dumped her into a waste disposal. _That_ is what happened to Ino."

With my sordid tale told, I reached out (cursing my fingers for trembling slightly) for my cup of water to drink from it. You could hear a pin drop...at least on this side of the room before low sniffles, from Karin probably, broke the silence. Naruto hadn't looked away from me, but I was still unable to read what he was thinking. His gaze was searching and intense; perhaps hoping to see if I was making it all up. Eventually, his lips thinned and he lowered his gaze to fiddle with the edge of his napkin...refusing to say anything else. I felt I ought to have gloated in victory at finally stumping him, but nothing but a sudden weariness overwhelmed me. I was done engaging in this constant verbal spar with him...at least for today.

"Well...I've officially lost my appetite," Shisui announced with a drop of his chopsticks. "Anyone else feel like eating dessert?"

When silence met his question, it was unanimously agreed that we should perhaps better get going. Night was falling fast and I was getting tired and needed my eyes to really rest anyway.

The bus ride was even more solemn, though I could hear Naruto trying to comfort Karin behind me with sweet talk. A cynical part of me assumed he was only doing this to get her to sleep with him, but I did have to mentally kick myself for not being more tactful with my story. Ino had been a close friend to the girl. I really didn't have to go into that much detail. As for Itachi, he wouldn't even look at me, though if his gentle squeeze of my shoulder as we were leaving the restaurant was any indication, I knew he wasn't too upset with my antics.

With a soft sigh, I leaned even closer to the window (though it was slightly grimy and the interior of the bus smelled like dried fish) and tried to enjoy the sights and sounds of my new adopted country. In the fading light, there was really nothing to separate it from the streets of Kyoto (being the only big city I had ever been to in my life). Besides the signs written in Korean, the streets were just as narrow, the homes/buildings just as clustered and the people just as preoccupied with their personal problems as anywhere else. It took a while to maneuver the mini-bus between the people weaving about on their bicycles and rickshaws, but otherwise, it was an uneventful journey.

I could feel my lashes growing heavier, and I struggled to stay awake. However, when something warm and soft fell over my shoulders, which caused me to jerk alert and turn with slight panic at who was bothering me, I was only met with my brother's kind visage. He had thrown a blanket over me; a small smile on his face.

"We should be there in about an hour," he whispered. "Try to get as much sleep as you can, okay?"

I opened my mouth to say something else, but for some insane reason, the overwhelming urge to burst into tears (maybe it was the blanket thing or just knowing I had someone who gave a shit about me in general) had me biting my lower lip and simply nodding before turning away and lowering my lashes again.

And this time, when I finally drifted off to fitful sleep, my dreams were filled with images of fish (the largest I had ever seen) with faces that were a mixture of Mama Tae and Orochimaru trying to bite me while everyone else laughed and called me a big for nothing fool.

* * *

><p><em>Naruto:<em>

I couldn't sleep.

I was tired...exhausted...downright fatigued, and yet my eyes wouldn't close as I stared out the window of the bus in deep thought.

Karin's head was heavy on my shoulder; a light snore escaping her lips every now and then. I had to admit it felt good to finally have her warm up to me; though her tears over her friend and having to hear that brutal story from Sasuke had really worked her up more than she would have liked. I had done my best to reassure and comfort her, almost feeling as if I was here to do damage control after Mr. Slow Poke had instigated the whole thing.

_Insensitive bastard._

And still...

_/ She was raped, probably several times over until she was unconscious, and when she came to, she was whipped and flogged until the skin of her back was ripped to shreds. Oh, as if that wasn't bad enough, they beat her all over; you could barely see her face anymore. They broke her arms and her legs and when they felt they had done enough damage, they tossed her useless body into a garbage bag and dumped her into a waste disposal. That is what happened to Ino._ /

It _was_ brutal. No one should have to go through something like that, and it was something I'd never wish for anyone...not even if he was an insensitive asshole.

I shuddered to think of such a thing happening to Sakura. Hell, what if it had _indeed_ happened to Sakura? Would I be able to keep such a level-head about me? Compared to getting a lone gunshot to end her life quickly, Ino's suffering and subsequent death seemed ten times worse. Also knowing it was led by the dude you had lived with almost all your life, someone you might have regarded as a friend or a father-figure at some point...

_I would have killed him,_ I thought feverishly unaware of my fingernails digging deep grooves into the palm of my hands. _I would have killed the bastard the moment I heard of what happened to my girl. Even if I wasn't successful, I'd still know I had died trying._

And yet Sasuke had bore it all...suffered through the knowledge that he really couldn't do anything even if he wanted to. That sucked. Really, really, fucking _sucked_. If even Itachi and Shisui with all their careful planning hadn't been able to get Snake Dude...what chance did Sasuke have? Maybe plenty...if he was living that close to the guy; maybe poison his drink or challenge him to a one-on-one duel or something..._anything!_

I sighed and glanced at the guy in question; only managing to see the top of his head though since he was kinda slumped and leaning closer to the window.

I realized I was beginning to feel sorry for him _again_, though every fiber in my being told me that the last thing he'd need is my pity. I watched as his brother covered him with a blanket and felt a pang of envy and some other emotion that really tugged my heart. It must be nice at least knowing you had a relative that was alive and who still cared about you. Sasuke wasn't all alone in the world as he assumed after all.

As for me...though Shisui had teased me about my father's exploits, and my reaction had not been exactly ideal (I guess it was just the shock of knowing my father had been a member of the syndicate in the first place), I was still curious to know about him in all honesty. I wanted to know more about the man who brought me into this world as well as my mother. I could vaguely remember what she looked like...

(red hair)

...and knew she must have loved me, otherwise she would have probably killed me before she passed on, just so I wouldn't suffer all alone. All the same, did I have a family now? Could I call this eclectic group of individuals my new family? Sasuke had Itachi, and if they both survived the next 'war', they might decide to move in together or something to start a new life. Shisui might probably join them or wander off on his own to someplace else. Shikamaru – who was currently dozing off as well – would end up with his girlfriend and keep his promise of marrying her and living as far away from Byaku-Shinkyou as possible. Haku, who was sleeping with his head on Karin's lap, would want to live with his precious Sasuke-sama, if that was possible, and Karin...I didn't know if her parents were still alive or not, but I doubted she'd want to remain a wanderer with Itachi and his organization for the rest of her life. She'd probably want to settle down with someone who wasn't wanted for murder and who could take care of her; hand and foot. That pretty much took me out of the picture. Still, I did want to 'be with her' if you know what I mean. Hell, just feeling the soft pressure of her breasts against my arm was triggering all sorts of warning bells in my head; a reminder that it has definitely been a while since I've had the pleasure of touching the female flesh.

_Patience. Patience. Patience._

I could have sworn I had only closed my eyes for a second, but the next thing I knew someone was shaking my shoulder and telling me to "wake the fuck up!"

"We're here," Shikamaru all but spat in my face, before I pushed his away with a hand.

"You're spraying all over me, man," I grumbled and struggled to sit up. Karin was already outside, so was everyone else actually.

With legs that felt like jelly and my vision still not all here, I all but stumbled out of the bus and stood (leaned) against it while rubbing my eyes.

"This...this is where we're going to be living?" Someone (Sasuke) asked as if unable to believe it himself.

I finally cleared my vision, and looked up, fully expecting to see something swanky and neat, but it was nothing more than an ordinary apartment building; just like you'd see in any other major town or city in Japan. This didn't look too rundown, but it was clear it had been in existence for quite a while. Being nighttime, not many people were up and about, but signs of civilization came in the noises from within the lit rooms; laundry hanging out to dry on clothes line on miniature balconies and piles of junk in some others.

About six other buildings like this made up the street and several more made up its backyard. The only good thing about the neighborhood was that this particular section was directly facing a shallow river which ran straight for about two miles before winding its way into more buildings in the horizon. Across the river was what looked like an ongoing construction site, a baseball field and then the highway. The pungent smell of fish, overflowing trash, chickens (yes, chickens) clucking around this late in the evening and the sweet but sickly smell of tobacco (the kind the old people liked to binge on) filled the air.

I loved it!

This was like a homecoming to me. I fully expected the _obaachan_ (my landlady) to come stomping out of her apartment to wag a finger at me telling me I still owed her rent for last month. However, instead of an old lady, it was a man in his late fifties or early sixties who was as tall as my shoulder, shuffling out of one of the lower apartments with a hunched back but still with a somewhat cheerful disposition.

"You're late," he accused in Hangul as Itachi bowed before him in apology. "What took you so long? I was about to give up on you."

"Forgive us," Itachi replied with a sheepish smile. "We had to get some food for our friends." With that, he motioned toward us and began to make the introductions. "This is Jae Weong Seo. He is the landlord of this complex and will be showing us our rooms."

"Nice to meet you," he said in halting Japanese, though he seemed pleased when we replied back in Hangul. "Ah, so you speak a little, so that's good. Come, come. We don't have much time to stand around."

Ushering us through the front doors, he led us past a foyer that struggled to look as presentable as possible. There was a counter on the right, from which I was sure he conducted his business, though it was now cluttered with tons of paper, magazines, and newspapers. On the large notice board behind it, were tacked flyers and notices for roommates, rent policies, sales, and other knick knacks I couldn't quite make out. There was a door which led into a small office which looked more like a storage space than an actual work room. There was so much stuff inside, there was barely any room for anyone to sit in, and yet from the half-eaten bowl of noodles sitting on the pile of papers as well as the miniature T.V. screen showing a baseball game, it was clear Mr. Jae had been enjoying his evening before we showed up.

With a grumble, he kicked aside a dirty soccer ball and a box of tools toward the corner of the foyer where a large plant was barely alive in these conditions.

"Sorry about the mess," Jae was saying as he shook his head and punched the button on the elevator. "My wife was supposed to clean this place today, but she's still visiting her mother in Ulsan." His sigh seemed to say it all. Methinks he and the wife must have had a falling out.

Luckily, the elevator was large enough to fit all of us (we had no significant luggage), though it was a somewhat tight fit all the same. Damn! The stench in here was terrible to be honest. This thing needed to be aired...and fast. Even leaning against the wood paneled wall – with its rather colorful graffiti in some corners – was making me cringe. Poor Karin looked like she was about to throw up. Shikamaru, Itachi, and Shisui must be used to places like this because they weren't reacting much. Haku was a mixture of curiosity and tolerance because he was trying his best to cover his nose without being too obvious about it, and Sasuke...

I had to stifle a snicker.

The guy looked like he was close to dying, which was a reminder that he had probably never lived in any place outside of his posh living quarters back at Byaku-Shinkyou. His head was lowered, but his already pale visage was whiter still. I just hoped to God he didn't pass out. He looked like he was close to it.

The chime of the elevator door finally opening was like the choirs of heaven singing. We just about tumbled out of the claustrophobic space, each of us gulping the fresh air like starved men. Well...it wasn't exactly fresh air, considering we were still inside, but it was ten times better than being stuck in there. I made a vow to use the stairs as much as possible...

"We are on the top most floor," Jae announced with a flourish.

_Fuck!_

Well, I'll try to use the stairs whenever I could.

"I did as you requested and cleared out all the rooms on this floor, so you wouldn't be bothered," Jae was saying. It was obvious Itachi and Shisui must have told him about our situation. "You stay in here, Miss." He motioned to Karin as he whipped out a pile of keys from his pocket and opened Room #631 for her. Thanking him for his kindness, she waved to us with relief and let herself into her abode with a firm click of the door behind her.

I was tempted to take a step toward it, to knock and ask permission to come in but...

_Patience. Patience. Patience._

"And here is another room for...at least two people can stay in here," Jae was saying as he opened Room #632. "Who wants -?"

"I'll stay with Shikamaru," I blurted out before he could finish. I smiled at my friend, and he nodded with a shrug. Good. I wasn't about to share a room with Sasuke, and besides, I was sure he'd rather be with his brother anyway.

"Works for me," Jae agreed and gave me the keys. "Enjoy your stay."

"Thank you!"

"And this is for..."

I was just in time to hear them say Sasuke and Haku would be in the room next to us, before I let myself into my new home for goodness knew how long.

Shikamaru flipped on the lights and I dumped the small backpack Itachi had given each of us to the wood floor to whistle in...eh...appreciation.

At least it was clean and didn't smell too bad.

It was just about as big as my last apartment, with just enough room for a living room/bedroom (there were futons in the closet for us to unfurl). A 20 inch T.V. stood on a small chest of drawers, which was adjacent to the sliding doors leading to the balcony. There was also a small desk and a chair for reading in the corner of the room. Two other doors revealed a tiny kitchen – only one person could fit in there at any one time – and the other contained only a toilet with a sink. There was no bath tub, which could only mean...

"Are you kidding me?" came the bellow from outside which forced Shika and I to poke our heads out to see what the commotion was about.

"What do you mean there's only one bathroom for the entire floor?" Sasuke was asking with an expression on his face that made me want to laugh. The guy looked absolutely horrified.

"It's a large bathroom...communal like," Jae was explaining. "You can wash up and take turns in the tub if you want. Sorry, I couldn't provide you with personal bathrooms. If you want that, go to Ulsan."

"I don't...!"

"We'll take it like so," Itachi was saying while trying to control his brother. "Thank you for all your help, sir." He glared at Sasuke and hissed beneath his breath. "Stop acting up and go to your room. We'll discuss bathroom problems in the morning."

"What about laundry?" I asked; unable to control my smirk as Sasuke shot me a dark look. He must be pissed that no one else was sharing in his misery at having to share a bathroom with commoners...or wait..._sinners_. Brr. Oh the horror! Wouldn't want to tarnish his blemish-free record.

"There's a laundromart across the street," Jae said with a smile. "Cheap to wash your clothes too, though some people like to wash them in their sinks and hang them outside their balconies. For the little things, you know."

"I'm happy," I replied with a clap of my hands. I grinned and gave the brothers, Haku, and Shisui a mock salute. "And now, I bid you all goodnight. This Uzumaki Naruto is done for. _An nyeong hi ju mu se yo_!"

An hour later, after brushing our teeth and making ourselves as comfortable as possible, Shika and I sat in our underwear on our futons, and eyed our only belongings on earth. Our new ID cards, immigration papers and of course the money.

"A total of W2,250,000," Shikamaru said after he placed the last note in the pile, which caused me to whistle in surprise.

"That's a lot, eh?"

"Not so much, if we do the conversion," he replied with his brow furrowed in thought. "If I'm not mistaken, that's about ¥160,000 in Japan. Should be enough to last us for a couple of months if we are frugal."

"I guess..." I picked up a wad of the cash and ran them through my fingers. "He did say we could get jobs, right?"

"Not so quick. We have to lay low for a while in case...you know."

I sighed and dropped the money, before flopping on my back. Luckily, the walls here were sound proof, so there was no risk of our conversation being heard.

"Don't remind me," I murmured gloomily. "It's like being back to square one, you know? I was on the run before I was finally smoked out by the Bakufu and this was the kind of life I led. Having to hide in apartments for weeks on end, only coming out at night...I can't go through this shit again. I don't know how I got involved with this anyway. This isn't really my fight, you know."

"Unfortunately, until Orochimaru and Danzo are dead, we are all in it now," Shikamaru replied as he tucked away the stuff and settled beneath his blanket. We remained in companionable silence for a while; neither of us bothering to close the blinds as we had chosen to stare out at the night sky in our new home.

It felt so..._weird._

"Strange, isn't it?" Shikamaru asked quietly.

"Mmm..." I nodded. "I can't help it though. I can't really relax. Almost feels like the door will open and some officer will come barging in saying it was all a dream and I had kitchen duty again."

Shika chuckled weakly. "Yeah...but see..." He pointed toward the twinkling lights in the horizon. "You couldn't see that from your closet, could you?"

"No...sure couldn't." I smiled a little and lowered my lashes. I would no longer see a whole bunch of things actually. I would no longer see my dungeon with its dripping walls and dank smells. I would no longer be made to remain underground; away from the pleasures of the real world, while being tortured for a sin I had committed. I had paid my dues over and over again, and I deserved to be free and happy.

Didn't I?

I would have drifted off again, but something that had been bothering me a little had me lifting them again and asking. "Hey..."

"What?" came the slow drawl. It was clear my buddy was this close to la-la land.

"How come you never spoke to Sasuke?"

There was a heartbeat of silence before the low reply came. "What have I got to say to him?"

"I thought you and Haku were all gung-ho about me liking the guy -"

"I never forced you to like him," Shikamaru mumbled and shifted to make himself more comfortable. Did I forget to mention how heavenly this felt against my body? Compared to sleeping on either cold rocky floors, thin mattresses and wooden surfaces, this was pure bliss. "I only said that maybe you should try to see things from his perspective."

"Hmph."

"Guess you got a good dose of that tonight."

"What do you mean?" I asked sharply; glancing at him or rather his shape beneath the blanket he had covered over his entire body.

"I mean his story about Ino. Even you must have felt sorry for him."

I did, but Shika didn't need to know that.

"...was thinking what I'd do if that happened to Temari," Shikamaru continued softly. "I'd probably go insane. No guy should have to go through life knowing he couldn't be there to protect the woman he loved...at least you got revenge, Naruto. He...he hasn't had the opportunity yet so the wound has never quite healed."

_Mine hasn't quite healed either,_ I wanted to retort, but I couldn't because I knew what Shikamaru meant. Though it had hurt to do it, and I had suffered nightmares (and still do in a way) over what had transpired, I was still able to exact my revenge by taking Kojima's life. A part of me could die happy knowing that the bastard who ended hers would no longer be roaming the earth, and yet Sasuke would go to bed tonight knowing that Orochimaru (as well as the fuckers directly responsible) were still alive and well miles away from here.

"Well, when his leg heals, I'm sure he'll be on the first boat out of here to finish the job," I muttered and turn to my good side (had to favor my arm) in an effort to get some sleep. "If I'm lucky, he can get them both and then I can live the rest of my life in peace."

Shikamaru chuckled wearily. "You and peace were never a tag team, Naruto. You know that. Keep on dreaming."

"Fuck you too, Shika."

"And I love you too, asshole. Goodnight and sweet dreams."

I smiled wanly and snuggled in as best I could. "Yeah...good night to you too..."

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke:<em>

I woke up with a scream lodged somewhere in my throat.

I dreamed Itachi and Shisui had taken us on this terrible bus ride to a place that was supposed to be our new home for the rest of my life. It was rat-infested, there was no running water, cockroaches crawled around me and some even sang and danced on my futon, and when I did manage to escape to the bathroom, there was Uzumaki Naruto...about twenty of them for God's sake! Taking up all the room and saying there was "no more space for me."

"You're just going to have to wait your turn, Sasuke," they began to chant and chant and chant and chant until it felt like the whole world was filled with about a million of them. I guess that was when I woke up to my disastrous reality.

I was no longer in Byaku-Shinkyou.

_Shit._

I rubbed my eyes wearily, glad that the cloudiness Shisui had said I was going to experience was not as bad as it was yesterday. The world was no longer in a perpetual haze and I had an even better view of my abysmal surroundings. Haku was still fast asleep beside me; the closest he has ever been to me since he became my manservant. Up close and personal, he looked like a child, though he was eighteen and even when awake, you'd hardly know it. His long black hair framed his face like a shroud, and he was curled in a fetal position; the blankets nearly thrown off him. Since we were yet to purchase clothes, he had only slept in his underwear and it allowed me to see just how slender he really was as well as some of the bruises he must have sustained while escaping the skirmish.

I sighed heavily and tried to adjust my position as best I could. I had ended up sleeping in the pair of shorts Itachi had given me on the boat, which wasn't exactly ideal in this situation. The futon wasn't exactly the most comfortable thing in the world either, and my back was now beginning to ache as well as my leg. Remembering we had a doctor's appointment today, I figured I might as well get up before anyone else and take advantage of the godforsaken communal bath before my nightmare came true.

Having to share a bathroom with Naruto...or any other person for that matter was sickening.

Trying to be as quiet as possible, though my clumsy attempts to be upright still had Haku stirring in his repose, I somehow managed to finally stand without falling flat on my face by balancing against the walls before finding my crutch. Though the blinds had been drawn last night, thin blades of early morning sunlight still managed to peek through; a sign that I really had to get moving before it was too late.

I winced as the door creaked open, but Haku still didn't awaken (a surprise considering he was a rather light sleeper. Guess he was more tired than he thought). Anyway, there was no one else in the hallway, which was very good. I began to hobble as fast as I could toward the end of it, when it hit me that I had nothing to bathe with. No towel. No soap. Not even a fucking washcloth. What the hell was I planning to do? Just pour water on myself and call that a bath?

With a groan, I began to hobble back toward my room, but had the bright idea to stop by Itachi's to see if I could swipe some of his things to use. My intention had been to knock on the door as quietly as I could, but I was surprised to find it unlocked when I twisted the handle gently.

Odd. For two people who were quite cautious about everything, you'd think they'd lock up their doors.

"Itachi?" I called out softly as I took a step into the room. It was just as tiny as ours was, with its blinds closed to let in only that sliver of light that was enough to illuminate the gloom. Their robes hung neatly over the lone chair in the room, and from the light snores I heard, it was clear that they were probably still fast asleep.

Leaning my crutch against the wall, I figured I would hop/tiptoe into the toilet to see if I could find his toiletries. Perhaps it would have been best if I had not bothered to peek at the sleeping duo, but I did...and nearly fell to the floor at the sight that beheld me.

_...what?_

There was supposed to be two futons. Yes, there _were_ two futons, but they had been moved close together to make it look much larger. That wasn't the problem though. The problem was the bodies beneath the blanket. Was it normal for them to be that...that _close_ to each other? To make it worse, it looked like my brother...MY BROTHER...was actually laying his head against Shisui's chest and Shisui – cold, detached, blunt, practical Shisui – was cradling him like a child. _Cradling_ him..._lovingly_.

_I think this is an illusion...that's all..._

It was then that the smell hit me; not so much the lingering smell of the room (I'm guessing all the rooms had that dusty stench of age), it was the 'other' smell that assailed my senses. The smell that I was all too familiar with whenever I shamefully pleasured myself or the night after Ino and I had our passionate encounter. It was the thinly veiled scent of musk...desire...passion, and I could feel my cheeks burning with a heat that seemed to creep from the tips of my toes to the root of my hair.

_No...it...I don't...I don't believe it!_

"Mmm..." came the low groan as the bodies began to stir.

_Oh shit! I have to get out of here!_

With my head and heart pounding so hard, I was sure it would really awaken them, I reached for my crutch again and as carefully as I could, hobbled out of the room and closed the door behind me with a hand that was still shaking like a leaf.

_Not true...not true...not true. It's not true...nothing happened. Hah..of course not. I was only seeing things, that's all._

I absently wiped my brow; slightly panicked to realize I was sweating a little. I tried to blame it on my quick attempt to escape, but I knew otherwise. My heart was still racing and that damn image of the two men embracing was still disturbing me in ways I did not want to explore any further. My brother couldn't be like that, let alone Shisui who looked as if the very concept of being in a relationship with any other human being was a travesty on his person.

Wait a minute...remember? Remember what he said at the restaurant when Naruto had assumed you were...you were..._like that_?

/And what is wrong with that? There's a whole new world out here, Sasuke. You're definitely going to meet people like that./

I slapped a hand over my mouth to control the sudden rise of last night's dinner in my esophagus. I squeezed my eyes shut and struggled to even my breathing. Itachi wasn't like _one of them_. He wasn't like..._Orochimaru_. He couldn't be! He'd ruin every positive image and ideal I've had of him since the day I was born! To think that my own brother could find comfort in the arms of another..._man_? _Why?_

The sound of a door opening had me looking up quickly, and as if my morning couldn't be worse already, it was my nemesis shuffling out of his room with a loud yawn and a crude scratching of his private parts. He was only wearing his boxer shorts, giving me a good view of the damage done to his body thanks to our fight – which now seemed to have happened centuries ago.

He hadn't noticed me yet since he was now stretching his lean build, and I figured I could slink back into the shadows and let him do whatever he wanted, but my damn crutch struck against the tin bucket, with a mop, some idiot had left, causing him to turn around sharply with his eyes narrowed in wariness.

_Damn it._

He wasn't wearing his contacts, and I was allowed to see those startling blue eyes again...which were now widening as he recognized and realized it was only me.

_My heart..._

Why the fuck was it beating so damn fast..._again_? Is it because of the look in his eyes? And what kind of expression was that anyway? Pity? Surprise? Bemusement?

"Uum..." he began slowly, while scratching the back of his head. "...eh...hey..."

_What now?_ I raised a brow at the stuttered conversation unaware I was clutching the crutch so tightly, I could have snapped it in two. What does he want to say to me? What could we possibly have to say to each other? I was _really_ not in the mood to start off my day with him insulting me. Goodness knows I was ready to unleash my frustration on someone right about now.

"...morning."

_Huh?_

"What?" I asked in genuine bemusement.

"I said "good morning", sheesh," he replied with a scowl. "Can't someone give you a simple greeting? You don't have to sound so pissed off already."

_No! Wait...it's not that! I just wasn't expecting...!_

"I am not -" I began to explain, but the door beside me suddenly opened to reveal the face of one of the men who had started off my morning on a very wrong foot.

"What's going on?" Shisui asked as he pulled a t-shirt over his head. "Oh, hey Sasuke..." he added when he noticed me, but it was with an effort that I stifled my scream (or the urge to slap him) before hobbling as fast as I could away from him (them) and into the bathroom with a slam of the door behind me.

I could almost picture them looking at each other in confusion at my behavior, but I needed some time alone to think, and perhaps to reassure myself that I was only imagining things.

_Breathe Uchiha Sasuke. Just...fucking...breathe._

And if my mind was still unsure of what it had just seen, then there really was no other choice but to confront Itachi and find out the truth...straight from the horse's mouth.


	19. 19: Dire Relativity

**Notes:** Whoohoo! Yay for inspiration! And early posting! Big thanks to bridmatt, Morana_Whiskey, Through_Darkness_And_Light, SilverSauce (and all your multiple reviews/comments *lol*), Tohru7, Opalynne, Starriecat! As I PM'd to bridmatt, I believe, things are slowly beginning to come together...well...not so much the long-awaited SEX you're all waiting for. Sheesh. I know, I know, you're getting impatient, but bear with me. I love to tell a story before jumping into bed with my characters, if you know what I mean. XD So thank you again for taking the time to leave a comment and for keeping up with the story all this time. I really do appreciate it. Happy reading!

P.S: Why do I predict some 'eew's coming up with a particular scene in this chapter? *dies* :p

P.P.S: My sincere apologies to those who are Koreans reading this story and you realize I've butchered your language. I am using a lot of different translation sites to get as close to the real meanings as possible, so please bear with me. And for those curious to know what was said in the last chapter by Itachi and Naruto, it was pretty much 'Thank you very much', but in different ways. Itachi's more formal...Naruto's less formal.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 19: <strong>

**Dire Relativity**

_Is there any way  
>Except by a messenger<br>To send these words to you?  
>If I could, I'd come to you<br>To say goodbye forever._

_- Fujiwara no Michimasa_

* * *

><p><em>Meaningless.<em>

"Please, Orochimaru-sama. Behold our newborn son."

_All meaningless._

"He is our first child, and we would be honored to have your blessings upon him."

He towered over their kneeling forms; an alabaster statue of aloofness staring dispassionately at the wailing infant cradled within its mother's arms. For an instant, he pictured his hand reaching out to cover those reddened features -

_(such an ugly child)_

...and squeezing until there was the crunch of bones and the ooze of its brain and blood coating his fingers.

_(hardly worth the trouble)_

He allowed his gaze to drift to the mother; to appraise her thoroughly, and without a doubt knew where the unfortunate infant had received its hideous looks from. She was a scarecrow of a woman – all limbs and hanging flesh, her liquid onyx eyes filled with that expression of adoration and worship that - on any other day - would have pleased him greatly. However, such idolatry only made him more irritated and dissatisfied (restless) and goodness knew he would rather not deal with all this today. He wanted his solace...to think...to solidify half-hatched plans. Unfortunately, it was a sacrifice he had to make, for his ploy to garner the public's sympathy over the 'destruction' of such a national treasure like Byaku-Shinkyou also included allowing said public into the grounds for a rare face-to-face meeting.

_(milk their sympathy...become the victim)_

He looked at the weakling of a father; a man who radiated greed and a penchant for other women as obvious from the sly glances he had been throwing at the other females in the vicinity. Orochimaru couldn't really blame him considering the specimen he had married, but he would not tolerate such expressions of lust and longing within the hallowed halls of the temple.

_(if I were in the mood, I'd have your carcass baking beneath the sun as an example for others)_

"Give me the child," he finally said aloud with outstretched arms. It took all of his acting skills not to cringe as the warm squiggling swaddled mass of a life form was placed within them. He stared into the face for only a second before looking out to the rapt congregation – about a thousand strong - before him.

"We bring this child in the presence of the Great and Holy One," he announced with as much intonation of reverence as he could; though his mind was now a million miles away with his other distressing thoughts. "We pray that he has a long life free from the temptations of wicked sins and iniquity -"

It was the smell that was the problem; the underlying stench of smoke, ash and death which still lingered heavily in the air almost three days after the disaster that had been Gudan. If he strained his ears hard enough, he could hear the unremitting sounds of construction going on around the grounds; a pitiful attempt to rebuild some of the destroyed buildings.

Over half of the sinners' quarters... gone. The entrances to the West and East block dungeons...charred to the ground. However, the worst of all was the arena specifically designed for the sacred festival. It was, without a doubt, his pride and joy, and to see the once grand stadium reduced to a shadow of its former self had sent barbs of pain so deep into his heart, he could barely stand while surveying the damage afterwards. His 'great' idea of setting up the ring of fire to create a more intense fighting atmosphere turned out to be the worst possible situation in the end. That, coupled with the fires started outside the stadium, eventually created an inferno that was difficult to tame. The firefighters had to give up, suggesting they simply wait until the flames extinguished on their own before going in for a final clean up.

_What a mess._

Those unfortunate souls who had been trampled to death (there must have been about two hundred in all) as well as some of his finest officers and guards, were either reduced to ashes or blackened stumps. The once sturdy steel dome, where a blood bath had occurred just hours earlier, now looked like a melted skeletal structure on its last legs. Nothing could have survived the fires, and Orochimaru had honestly assumed both Sasuke and that blond sinner had met their end in the fiery flames...

...until Kimimaro told him what happened.

(still alive)

(escaped)

(still alive)

(Sasuke...)

Unaware of how hard he was now squeezing the child in his arms or the pinched expression on his visage as the monotonous prayers and chants from the congregation droned on, Orochimaru experienced the same emotions of shock, anger/fury, and yes...even a tiny bit of relief at the news.

_Relief?_

Yes. For though he told himself countless times that he was only doing this for his self-interest and that Sasuke's death was of a huge benefit to the plans he and Danzo had set into motion, there was still a tiny part of him that cared deeply for the obstinate young man. So yes, he had done something cruel in murdering his parents as well destroying the happier/normal life he could have had, but in return, Orochimaru felt he had done the best he could in raising the ultimate warrior and companion to spend the rest of his days with. Sasuke would have been the perfect blend of the two, eventually becoming much stronger than Kimimaro and taking over that coveted position as his right-hand man (in every possible way). He bit his lower lip as a tidal wave of bitterness overwhelmed him. Perhaps if he had been more strict with the boy...made him more submissive from an early age instead of letting him do things his own way in an attempt to act like a 'friend' and 'father'. Though Sasuke had never really warmed up to him, there were moments when the little child had clung to his every word; soaking up all his words of wisdom and not cringing whenever an embrace was exchanged or a gentle kiss on his forehead.

When did it all change?

When he allowed that damn traitor, Sarutobi, to get in the way, that's when. It was a good thing Kimimaro had taken care of that fool, or Orochimaru would not have gone any easier on the once decorated officer. He had assumed their relationship was purely platonic and professional, and yet who knew what that bastard had been feeding his precious one all these years to poison his mind against him?

As if that wasn't bad enough, Kimimaro's revelation that Uchiha Itachi and Shisui were _still_ alive and were probably the leaders in charge of this ambush, had caused him to laugh in stunned disbelief. He took pride in being able to pinpoint his enemies and destroying them before they had the opportunity to attack first, and yet...those two young men had somehow managed to evade him all these years. Orochimaru had to give it to them. Wasn't that why the Uchiha had been feared? Their ability to be in control from the shadows had made them formidable opponents. And yet, what was he to think of Uchiha Shisui being under the employ of Danzo in the first place? Danzo had never revealed that to him despite his claim of 'transparency' in all their dealings, but here it was. A glimpse of the truth. The old coot had lied to him again! Making it seem as if he had no knowledge of any other Uchiha still in existence.

_What a fool I've been._

Well no more. No longer was he going to rely on Danzo's counsel from now on. With the Commissioner detained in the hospital, Orochimaru knew he'd have to move quickly to gain control of the situation, hence his decision to perform the mock funeral, while striking up a deal with the current _kumichō_ of the Bakufu Syndicate.

To be honest, Orochimaru _loathed_ the _yakuza_ with a passion. To him, they were nothing more than thugs in suits; claiming to be overlords of Japan with their decadent ways and unscrupulous methods of achieving their goals. Drugs, alcohol smuggling and trafficking, human trafficking, prostitution, slavery, bribery, corruption, greed, embezzlement...just thinking about it all gave him a major headache and a need to purify himself continuously. Hence making the decision to pick up the phone to speak to Ryoichi Ikegami had given him a severe case of migraine.

"I'm surprised that the great leader, Orochimaru-sama, would be calling a lowly servant like myself," came the smoky drawl, so full of sarcasm, Orochimaru would have happily reached into the phone to kill him in that instant.

"We are of like minds, Ikegami-san," he replied as evenly as he could. "Perhaps we can be of some help to one another."

"Is that wise? Danzo has been the one calling the shots... at least he thinks he has," Ryoichi added darkly, and even Orochimaru had to smile at that. For years, Danzo had assumed he kept the Bakufu in his pockets, but perhaps the embers of rebellion were beginning to take shape at last. All the better.

"What makes you think I want to work with a man like you?" Ryoichi continued testily. "Having you two crazy bastards on my ass is not exactly my idea of running an effective business."

"You forget that I have pardoned a lot of your crimes," came the hard reply. "I've had to turn the blind eye to some of your sins, Ikegami-san, and I'd hate to have the public aware of just how 'trustworthy' you are. How's that car sales business of yours doing anyway?"

Orochimaru sneered as he literally heard the other man's grinding jaws at the other end of the line. "I see your point," Ryoichi finally grated through clenched teeth. "You try to stop the import of my automobiles -"

"Filled with probably several thousand kilos of heroin..."

"What do you want?" came the curt interruption.

"Nothing too difficult," Orochimaru replied with a cold smile. His gaze was absently trained on the blasted Uchiha crest painted on the wall of his underground lair. He had always wanted to paint over that thing, but as usual...his need to please Sasuke forbade him to do so. _Damn it._

"Your syndicate is easily the most powerful in the nation...if not across Asia...and I'd like you to wield your might in searching for a group of renegades who are nothing more than nuisances."

"Hah."

"What is so amusing?"

The _kumichō _all but smirked on his end. "An unfortunate incident that happened to your precious Byaku-Shinkyou, right?"

Orochimaru's fingers tightened around the receiver. He counted inwardly to ten before replying as calmly as possible. "You have an idea of who they are, don't you?"

"Perhaps."

"So you were aware of their existence?" he barked in annoyance; now wondering if Danzo had known as well. In fact, how the hell wasn't he sure that Danzo had planned this all from the beginning? Sure he had been shot and might lose his right arm eventually, but that was a small price to pay for all the damage done here.

_That sly son-of-...!_

"I'm surprised you weren't able to capture any of them," Ikegami was saying.

_How could they?_ Orochimaru thought wildly. The few renegades caught in the skirmish had either died at the hands of overzealous officers (who hadn't thought long enough to capture them for questioning), or committed suicide when they realized they were backed into a corner. Their leaders had trained them well. Orochimaru would admire that core principle within the organization, if it wasn't for the destruction and chaos they had left in their wake.

"Your task," he spat out to change the subject from his failures. "Is to have your men search thoroughly for them. Do I make myself clear? You have over three hundred clans under your watch, so it shouldn't be too difficult to get them all involved in this. If it means having to search in neighboring countries, then do it!"

"You know I can't go stepping into the Chinese triads' turf," Ikegami countered back with a yawn of boredom. "And besides, I doubt they would have gone very far in such a short time. So whose head do you want? Their leaders' or do we have permission to kill anyone who remotely knows of their organization?"

"I want one or two for questioning...preferably those in high enough positions, but anyone who is in the thick of things will work. Oh, and while you're at it, any living Uchiha left, please destroy as well. They have been thorns in my sides long enough."

"How the hell are we supposed to know that?" Ikegami asked irritably. "I know they've got weird special things with their eyes, but I can't just go about asking my men to kill anyone who might have their last name."

Orochimaru held a finger to his temple and rubbed it gently. "Fine! Focus on finding out about this Akatsuki organization and its members and destroy it! Torture them enough so they will have no willpower to kill themselves and let me know, understand?"

"Yeah, yeah..." Orochimaru could have sworn he heard 'you pain-in-the-ass' being muttered, but he ignored it. It was time to play his trump card.

"Ah, I might have something of interest to you as well."

"What now?" Ikegami was no longer in the mood to deal with this insane, power-hungry bastard.

"You remember the death of one of your members...a Masataka Kojima from the Nagasaki prefecture at the hands of a young man who was in debt to you?"

Ikegami stiffened. How could he possibly forget? Having members of his syndicate get killed everyday was no big deal and some losses he even welcomed especially if they were troublesome. However, Kojima's death had struck the hardest because the irresponsible son-of-a-bitch had been his late sister's only child. Kojima had had the potential of becoming a _wakagashira_ (first lieutenant) eventually, but his decision to engage in boozing, whoring, and random killings (Ikegami had lost count of how many times he had to bail out the fool from prison) had held him back from getting 'the call' to the big leagues. Ikegami knew Kojima had always held it against him for not progressing, and perhaps it was his way of rebelling, but all the same he had raised the man as his son and despite all his sins, Ikegami still loved him.

To hear of his death had been a crushing blow to say the least, and Ikegami had set out to find the killer no matter what it took. It had taken a while, but eventually they had found the bastard; some dumb kid who really had no right waving a gun about. Ikegami would have loved to 'punish' the kid the yakuza way, but the watchdogs had gotten him first, hence the decision to take him to Byaku-Shinkyou in the end. His hope had been that by now the kid would have gotten a lesson in torture and beheaded like all the other sinners in the past. Justice had to be served after all.

"What about him?" he finally asked.

"Let's just say that young man managed to escape during the ambush," Orochimaru drawled lazily. "So right now, the man who killed your precious nephew is probably out and about as a free man. We can't have that happening, can we?"

Ikegami could feel the blood draining from his features, and he gripped the edge of his desk until his knuckles were white as sheets. "Wasn't it your job to get rid of him?"

"You saw what happened at Gudan," Orochimaru replied tightly. "Somehow, it seems he might be a member of Akatsuki. Maybe they had planned to free him from the beginning."

"That...!"

"Good! I'm glad to see that you're more motivated to find him now."

"I want his head," Ikegami growled. "I want to deal with him my own way, got it? I allowed you watchdogs to take charge and you couldn't handle it. Allow us to show you how it's really done."

Orochimaru shrugged. "Whatever you say. If you find him, he's all yours. Although..."

"What now?"

"If it turns out he's with the Uchiha brothers..." Orochimaru paused.

"The _Uchiha brothers_?" Ikegami asked incredulously. "I thought that whole family was dead."

"And indeed they are," Orochimaru added with a firm nod. There was no need discussing that aspect with this man. "Your only mission is to find the rest of the members of the Akatsuki organization and the blond one...Uzumaki Naruto. Do what you will when he is found. However, do not harm anyone else with him, do I make myself clear?"

"Fine with me. He's the only one I want anyway."

"Good...although I should warn you that he might be a very tricky customer."

"Why's that?"

"I believe his father was a former member of your organization. Someone who was quite the assassin and was next in line to be _kumichō_ – your current position - before he deflected the syndicate almost twenty years ago."

"What are you -?"

"Put it together, Ikegami-san," Orochimaru sneered. God, he loved tossing in a wrench to ruin people's plans. It was always good to do a little homework. You never knew when such extra knowledge would become useful. "He was your comrade...well more like a mere 'little brother', while you were the honorable first lieutenant waiting for your turn to become the _oyabun_. However, there was a rumor floating around that this young man, with such talent and potential, was already being touted as the next _kumichō_. Can you believe that? Your father apparently didn't think too highly of you in the end, did he?"

"You bastard..." came the low growl, but Orochimaru wasn't done with his story.

"Naturally, this didn't sit too well with you, and if I'm not mistaken, there were several attempts made on this young man's life...with you being the culprit behind the scenes..."

"Shut up! You don't know anything!"

And yet from the pounding of the fist on the desk and the heavy breathing (of panic) filling his ears, Orochimaru knew he was definitely hitting a sore spot and triggering memories Ikegami would have preferred to keep buried.

"Oh, don't I?" Orochimaru continued with a mock yawn of weariness. "You finally had to implore Danzo's help, didn't you? Which is odd considering Danzo regarded him highly as well. I guess the old bastard doesn't take too well to those who question his authority as I'm sure Minato did. Any way, together, you finally took down your greatest threat...though it was unfortunate that his wife and child survived and managed to escape."

"What...are...you...trying...to...say?" Ikegami grated harshly.

"I'm trying to say, you insufferable dolt, that the young man you are on the hunt for now, is the son of Minato Namikaze, the rightful heir to your current seat! Your father had his plans already set, but you and Danzo saw it fit to eliminate those who knew of this transfer of power, didn't you? If he finally understands and knows of who's responsible for the loss of his family and true heritage, I have no doubt the threads of revenge will begin to unravel. The blood of Senju runs through his veins, so he is not an easy one to deal with."

A brief image of Naruto fighting in the dome filled Orochimaru's mind, and that familiar thrill of lustful desire at the animalistic expression on the blond's features seared down his spine. The thought of such a beast in power...

"...son...of...Minato...im...impossible!"

"Yes. So, even more of an incentive to find and have him destroyed, eh?"

Heavy silence greeted this, and Orochimaru would have laughed with mirth; imagining the pale features on the other man's grizzled face. From the few pictures he had seen of Ryoichi Ikegami, he was a bear of a man; standing over six feet tall with a physique that had once been considered the envy of body builders everywhere. At almost sixty years old, he was still able to intimidate anyone just by walking into a room, but at this very moment, Orochimaru was sure this 'great man' had been reduced to nothing more than a panicked child desperate to pick up the shattered pieces of his once perfect life.

_(serves him right)_

"Ikegami-san?"

"How...?" the other man cleared his throat and tried again; hoping to sound angry. "How are you sure of this? He did not get married! He never had a wife! If he did, we would have known!"

"You fool!" Orochimaru hissed. "If you idiots had not been content to settle back to toast your minor victory, you would have realized he thought ten...a thousand steps ahead of you! Isn't that why he was next in line for being the head of the Bakufu? That unlike you, he was more thorough and deliberate before making any decision; many of which he did to make your Syndicate what it is today? You might have taken his life, but his legacy lives on. It is now up to you to snuff out that flame before it burns even brighter. In other words, do _not_ fuck it up this time, _kumichō_."

"You don't tell me what to do! You do not -!"

"I am done with this discussion unfortunately," Orochimaru snapped impatiently as he glanced at the clock. "We will speak again if there is any news..._successful_ news that is. Oh and before I leave, this conversation between us must never be mentioned to Shimura Danzo. Consider this a covert mission under my guidance, is that clear?"

There was a barely audible sigh of irritation at the other end. "Understood. But what -?"

"Good bye, Ikegami-san. It was a pleasure speaking to you."

He hardly gave the other man a chance to respond before hanging up the device and rising to his feet. He knew that Ikegami would have a million and one questions, especially with his slip up of the mention of the brothers and Minato's living son, but the _kumichō_ was a man of his word, and Orochimaru had no doubt his instructions would be carried out to a tee.

_Orochimaru-sama..._

(let him figure out what to do with the information about Minato)

"...chimaru-sama?"

He blinked and forced himself back to the present; now aware of the slight tug on his robe from one of the High Priests. He, along with everyone else in the temple, were watching him with varied expressions ranging from bemusement to concern. The chanting and praying had stopped minutes earlier, and apparently they were expecting him to finish with a final word or two. This he did almost automatically; hardly understanding half of what he was saying before he delivered the 'blessed' child back into the grateful parents' embrace and finishing with another round of prayers before dismissing them.

"Thank God that charade is over," he mumbled to himself as he swept past the priests and guards while making his way to his private chambers. Kimimaro followed silently behind him; his expression hardly giving anything away, though Orochimaru had known the young man long enough to realize that he was still moping over what had transpired the other day.

"Betrayal is inevitable," Orochimaru snapped impatiently. "I knew that boy would be trouble the moment you picked him up from the snow. You should have left him to die."

Kimimaro winced inwardly, but kept his silence. Absently, his hand reached out to caress the scarred torso beneath his uniform; a painful reminder of Haku's final decision. Though he had pretended not to care, Kimimaro had still seen the anguish in the younger man's eyes, and had realized just how much it must have hurt Haku to inflict an injury on him. The feeling was mutual. Though their relationship had cooled over the years, Kimimaro still felt Haku owed him his life and would definitely not have expected this from him.

"Would you like me to draw you a bath, my Lord?" he finally asked softly.

"No...not yet," Orochimaru replied with a distracted air. "I...I would like to take a walk first...and then perhaps I will send for you later."

Kimimaro nodded and excused himself, leaving Orochimaru to stand rooted to the spot – in the middle of his lavish bedroom – before shaking himself a little as if rousing awake from a daydream. Through the back doors, he ambled aimlessly for a while around the private gardens; that sickening, lingering aroma of carbon monoxide filling his lungs and causing him to cough pitifully. It was a depressing reminder that despite his outward attempts to remain youthful, the years were beginning to catch up with him. He knew he was no longer as fast as he used to be; so fast that his good friend and rival, Uchiha Fugaku, had nicknamed him 'Lightening'.

_Ah Fugaku...even in death, you still manage to screw me over. You have brought up two very wise and beautiful sons, but unfortunately; their living is only going to be even more of a hindrance to me. Please forgive me for not sending them to you quick enough._

He came to a stop as he realized he had ambled right into Sasuke's section of the grounds, which was in actuality, the previous home of the head of the Uchiha clan. It was the least he could have done for the boy, while he had built his current extravagant abode. For all their wealth and power, there was nothing really extraordinary about this place. Sure the wood used for construction were sturdy and of the finest money could buy, but from the outside, it could have been any other ordinary family home. With bitterness on his tongue, and a slight heaviness in his heart, Orochimaru pushed open the _shoji_ screen doors and was immediately assailed by the lingering scent of the young man he had lost. It was as if time had stood still in here, the pungent stench of smoke and death which filled the 'outside' hardly filtering into the neat rooms.

Orochimaru paced around slowly; soaking in every thing as if deprived of such a sight. It had been a while since he visited Sasuke's home; only because a part of him felt sullied at the notion of being around Fugaku's spirit. His fingertips caressed the low antique desk, which still had a neat pile of papers (forms to be filled and signed with the never-ending list of sinners for admission or release), a crystal paperweight of a hawk; a gift from Orochimaru several birthdays ago. He hated to admit the sight of this warmed his heart a little. There were his quills and ink...his stamps...and a worn prayer book, which Orochimaru flipped through absently to note that Sasuke didn't take his faith too lightly. The boy had annotated just about every page with his thoughts, while highlighting sections that interested him. Such studiousness was also noted in the other books arranged neatly in the low shelves. The young man had definitely not believed in 'light reading' had he? Most of the books dealt with faith, religion, philosophy, and psychology; anything that seemed to deal with the workings of Man's dilemma between salvation and death.

_(fascinating)_

On his left, Sasuke's uniform – what he must have hoped to wear if Gudan had been successful – hung neatly against his closet. Orochimaru allowed his fingers to caress the fine black cloth, while imagining the beautiful body that should have been in it. He closed his eyes and moaned pitifully, wrapping his arms around the uniform and inhaling the unique (almost knee-weakening) scent that could only belong to Sasuke.

_(to see you one last time before I kill you...that is all I ask...to touch you and see...hear that oh-so-beautiful sound of your satiation before I drain the life out of you...feel your succulent blood on my tongue as I suck you dry...that is all I could ever want)_

But for now, he would bide his time and wait for the reports on their whereabouts. He doubted it would take very long. For between Ikegami's clans and his special secret forces within the watchdogs, Orochimaru was sure he had everything covered.

Those bastards would simply have no place to hide.

* * *

><p>Naruto officially labeled it the 'bus-ride-to-hell'.<p>

So far, his day was turning out to be a very shitty one, no thanks to Mr. Slow Poke who had hogged the bathroom for almost a whole hour; keeping the rest of them locked out because of his bipolar tendencies. No matter how many times he banged on the door, Sasuke just wouldn't let them in. What the hell was the guy doing in there for a whole freakin' hour? How long did it take for him to scrub himself and rinse off?

It wasn't until big brother finally stepping in, did Sasuke finally hobble out. And did he apologize for keeping everyone else waiting? You bet your ass he didn't. He just acted as if the past few minutes of Naruto hollering and calling him names hadn't happened (didn't even spare Naruto a glance, let alone his brother) before slamming the door to his room shut.

Some people just needed to be slapped (again!) in his opinion, and now that they were away from 'authority', Naruto's fingers were more than itching to do the deed.

He glared at the shaggy black locks before him; the childish urge to reach out to tug them until Sasuke cried 'uncle' overwhelming him. However, something else about the atmosphere made him think otherwise. For one thing, Sasuke wasn't sitting close to his brother. In fact, all throughout this morning, it appeared as if Sasuke didn't even want to look at his brother's face. What the hell happened last night? Did they fight? Naruto hadn't heard any arguing. If anything, he was sure they had been getting along well, besides, Itachi was way too cool to start an unnecessary fight. So what was the deal?

Itachi, for his part, was just as bemused. He was sitting beside the driver (the same Korean who had delivered them to Jae's apartment complex last night) and every now and then, would glance into the rearview mirror, only to see that same sullen expression on Sasuke's features as he looked out the window. He couldn't understand it. Shisui had said something about Sasuke being outside their door when he woke up, and when he tried to start up conversation, the younger man had just about shot daggers at him with his eyes before locking himself in the bathroom.

Over a quick breakfast of instant ramen, courtesy of Jae, where plans had been made for the way the day would go, Itachi had felt the same 'cold' vibes from Sasuke. Any attempt to get his brother to make a suggestion or give a 'yay' or 'nay' to anything was met with resolute silence or an indifferent shrug. It was annoying when Sasuke got this way (and goodness knows he did that a lot as a child), and Itachi had hoped he'd have outgrown this side of him, but apparently not.

(some things just never change)

With or without Sasuke's help, it was decided that Itachi would be the one to take them to the hospital, while Karin, Haku and Shikamaru would go shopping for some much-needed household items and food. Shisui had some 'other' business to attend; code for doing some snooping around to find out what was going on across the sea. At the end of the day, they'd return for a meeting to compare notes and see what steps they could take from here on out.

"Hey, Itachi!" Naruto called out from his position in the back seat. "How much longer before we get there?"

"About five minutes, give or take," Itachi replied with a small smile thrown over his shoulder. "How's your shoulder feeling?"

Naruto tried to flex it, but it was still pretty stiff beneath the wad of bandages. "Not too good. Must have slept on it after all and feels a little weird."

He hoped he hadn't dislocated it again. He wanted this shit to heal fast, so if he was lucky, he could bolt away from this crew and get 'lost' again with his wanderings before they could stop him. It was a decision he had come to in the wee hours of the morning. He knew he was technically still a wanted criminal and had been on death row, but with his freedom, was it better for him to hang around these guys? Being stagnant and risking being found again? Or was it better to return to being a nomad; not settling down in one place for too long before heading off again? It was a pain, but it was better than nothing.

"How's your leg, Sasuke?" Itachi was asking, and Naruto was unaware he was holding his breath as he waited for the other man's answer.

After what seemed like an eternity, Sasuke finally mumbled out a 'it's fine', and left it at that. Itachi gave a curt nod and turned his attention back to the driver to speak to him, while Naruto shook his head in disbelief and stared out his window.

_Man...if I had a brother, I'd never treat him like that. I don't care what he does to me. He's even lucky he's got a damn family member left._

(and I've got nothing)

Which all brought it back to Shisui's little tale about his father. Naruto was gradually coming to realize just how much he _really_ wanted to know more about this guy and even his mother. If his father had really been a member of the Syndicate...would they have willingly left him and his mother to die? He thought Syndicate members took care of their own. Wasn't that what Kojima preached to him about all the time? So why? Why had his father abandoned them in their time of need? What really happened to him all those years ago?

_(if you hadn't died...I wouldn't be in this mess, right now. We could have been a real family; lived in a nice house...gone to a good school...maybe even be in college now...)_

So what the fuck went _wrong_? Maybe he ought to talk a little more to Shisui, begin some sort of investigation into his father's life. At least if nothing else, he could make peace with the past and move o –

"Urgh!"

A sudden jolt had him nearly falling off his seat, and he blinked hard and looked around in mild panic.

"What the hell -?"

"It's okay," the driver was saying in broken Japanese. "I be careful with these people who don't know how to cross road. Move!" he bellowed to a man with a slow moving truck filled with chickens.

It took almost a good half-hour to finally clear the damn road, and by then the heavy stench of chicken feces, hay, and a few stray feathers floating in through the windows; had the occupants of the minibus wishing the trip was over already. Luckily, the bus finally pulled up to a cluster of two-storey buildings; none distinguishable from the other except for the crooked sign, on one of the doors, with the characters: 자비의 클리닉 우리의 레이디

...which roughly translated into 'Our Lady of Mercy Clinic'. Naruto thought the place looked a little shady, but he realized they couldn't risk going to one of those bigger hospitals, and he'd have to trust that Itachi knew what the fuck he was doing by bringing them here.

"I know it looks suspect," he said as if reading Naruto's mind while they stepped out of the bus and into the mid-morning sunlight. "But the doctor is a good friend of mine and is actually quite the best at what he does."

"Business not doing too well then?" Naruto asked with a smirk.

Itachi chuckled and looked back to the bus, hoping to help his brother out. "He's one of those men who prefer to work for a good cause and not just for money. A rare breed indeed. Do you need some help, Sasuke?"

"I got it," Sasuke grunted as he lumbered and fought with his crutch for almost a minute before managing to extract himself from the bus without falling on his face. As before, he ignored the hand offered to him and hobbled ahead of his companions. Naruto rolled his eyes and stuck his hands into the pockets of his pants before following Itachi, who was finally not wearing a robe today and looked relatively normal in western clothing.

Naruto guessed it was a trait all the Uchiha men had; too look good and attract attention even if they didn't want it. It was noticeable in the way the nurse at the front desk just about drooled all over herself as Itachi went up to speak to her, and how the other nurses (and the few patients in the waiting hall) gawked at Sasuke as he hobbled to find a seat for himself.

The only attention Naruto got was a little kid, of about five, pointing at his face and probably asking his mom why that guy's got those weird marks on his cheeks. Naruto had had to deal with that while in Japan, so why would it be any different here? He tried to smile and engage the kid in a game or something, but the boy would only cling to his mother's chest with a frightened expression while she tried to apologize on his behalf.

"This way," Itachi announced as he approached the men, who were literally sitting miles apart from each other. He sighed inwardly. "He's expecting us."

This time, Sasuke brought up the rear, not that he had wanted to. Naruto was happily chatting away with his brother, and not for the first time, he felt a pang of envy at how easily the blond could start up conversation with someone he barely even knew.

_And why are you getting upset anyway? You've been the one acting like a dick all morning. Itachi's tried to talk to you, but all you do is push him away. Just how do you plan to bring up the conversation about what you saw anyway? With the way you're acting, you're lucky if he even gives you the time of day afterwards._

Sasuke tightened his lips as they made the turn to a much quieter section of the clinic. It was a shorter hall, with a small nursing station at the end – which was currently empty – several doors that were closed and two benches at either side of the corridor.

"You can both wait here," Itachi advised; watching again as (predicted) both took the other bench; as if the very notion of sitting close to each other was going to have them engaging in another fight. If this kept up, how the hell was Sasuke going to fit into normal society? Left to him, he really would have loved to stay a little longer to perhaps teach his brother a little more about how good life could be outside Byaku-Shinkyou, but Shisui's impatience and their need to set their plans in motion would have to take precedence. Sasuke would just have to grow up (all over again) without his help for the most part. His naïve (and hopeful) thinking was that maybe Naruto would become a chaperone in his place, for it seemed like the blond had seen more of the world and could impart his knowledge and wisdom to his younger brother. However, with this ever widening gulf between them...

(pigs might as well fly)

He sighed again. "Doctor Sun Woo will be out soon," he continued. "His office is that door on the right. He already knows what happened and won't bother you with any unnecessary questions. I'll be in the main waiting room. When you're both ready, you can meet me out there, okay?"

"No problemo," Naruto said with a mock salute. Sasuke said nothing; his eyes closed and head thrown back to rest against the wall. There was a light sheen of sweat on his forehead; a sign that either his leg was really bothering him or the hobble from front to back of the clinic had taken more of a toll than he'd like to admit. Either way, Itachi hoped that Sun Woo would be able to give the proper medication and treatment he required.

_Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock._

With Itachi now gone, the silence between Naruto and Sasuke became oppressive. Sasuke kept his eyes closed, though he was still hopelessly aware of the other man sitting across him.

_(restless...too damn restless)_

Naruto couldn't be still for more than a minute. If it wasn't his butt squeaking across the bench, it was his foot tapping or his fingers drumming or a loud exaggerated sigh or a whistle or a muttered curse or the scratching of his scalp or...

"Cut it out," Sasuke finally snapped. His lashes flew open and he pinned an annoyed glance at his companion, who looked back with a raised brow and a slow smirk coming to his lips.

"He's alive after all. All praises to the heavens."

"Shut up."

"Make me."

"I am not going to indulge in your childish games," Sasuke retorted and closed his eyes again. "You're just so damn annoying."

"Says Mr. High and Mighty, who is such a first grade dick."

Sasuke's lashes flipped open again. "What was that?"

"You heard me." Naruto threw up his hands as if in frustration. "I don't get it. I really don't. What's your problem anyway?"

_You!_ Sasuke's mind roared, but he kept his mouth stubbornly shut.

"You've got a brother who's worried about you, and all you do is treat him like shit. I guess that slap on the boat didn't do the trick after all. If I were him, I'd put you over my knee and spank the living hell out of you."

Sasuke flushed at the brief mental image this conjured up before kicking himself mentally. "Do not speak to me like that, you -"

"What? Sinner? Was that what you were going to say? Hey, buddy." Naruto sneered. "News flash. We're no longer in _that_ place, remember?"

Sasuke's eyes narrowed. "So?"

"So? Out here, we're _equals_. No more officer versus 'sinner'," he said with a quote of the air with his fingers. "We're both fugitives, so you might as well start getting used to it. If my ass is caught, your ass is dead meat too."

"We might be fugitives, but I will never be your equal."

"Because you think you're better than me?" Naruto asked darkly. "Because I wasn't born as some shitty elite? Is that it?"

"This has nothing to do with being an elite or not," came the clipped reply. "I have only one goal in mind and that is to defeat Orochimaru and Danzo and claim back what is rightfully mine...ours. Once order is restored, I will not hesitate to finish what I started with you, Uzumaki Naruto. Do not forget you are still a criminal for the murder of another human being -"

"Says the person who's killed others all in the name of some shitty practice."

Sasuke took a deep breath and tried to control himself. "Listen -"

"Say?" Naruto interrupted with a snap of his fingers as if a bright idea had suddenly occurred to him. "When you are done killing Orochimaru and Danzo, how about you kill yourself too? Commit _seppuku_ or something. It will only be fair, won't it? You're killing them for revenge, aren't you? For the shit they did to your family and your girlfriend, right?" He leaned forward and grinned. "It's just like me then. I killed off Kojima for revenge, so what makes your situation any different from mine?"

What indeed.

Naruto seemed to be waiting; those faux hazel eyes gleaming with a knowledge that sent Sasuke's heart pounding with the realization that Naruto was right on all levels. What made his need to eliminate those two men from Naruto's decision to rid the world of the man who took the only person he loved? How much of a hypocrite did that make him?

"See?" Naruto sat back with a smug expression of satisfaction. "You're thinking about it now, aren't you? Good. Glad to see you're not about to spill some of your religious, self-righteous crap on me again."

However, just as sudden as it appeared, the smug expression dissipated to be replaced with a pensive look as he lifted his gaze to the ceiling. "Look...I don't like you, you don't like me. That's just something we're going to have to try to deal with or manage as best as possible until things settle down. So..." He lowered his gaze to pin it on Sasuke. "How about we call a truce of sorts. We don't snap at each other and try to have a civilized conversation, eh? I swear you have no idea how much it takes just to think up something nice to say to you."

"Likewise," Sasuke replied wryly. "I think I expend way too much energy just considering the notion of speaking to you."

"So...truce?" Naruto gave his first real genuine smile of the morning.

Every instinct within Sasuke screamed for him to reject this proposal; that Naruto was only mocking him and would turn around and laugh behind his back at being so gullible. Allowing Naruto to dictate their relationship was only going to make him vulnerable and he couldn't relinquish his fastidious desire to remain in control of any situation they found themselves in. He had been the leader of others for so long; never knowing how to really communicate other than giving orders or accepting them, how the hell was he to conduct a proper conversation with someone like Naruto?

What was a _normal_ conversation like? Like the few he had with Asuma? But even then, there had always been a little 'barrier' between them. With Naruto...they were practically the same age. What could they possibly _talk_ about?

He noticed the blond's smile was wavering; an uncertainty and that familiar look of impatience about to fill his features. Sasuke knew he'd have to make his decision quickly; if he wanted to 'try' to become more civil with Naruto. He just wished his damn heart would stop beating so fucking fast.

_Try...try...try... _

...and just as he opened his mouth to seal his fate, the door to the doctor's office opened to reveal the flushed but friendly features of a portly man in his forties.

"Ah, you must be my patients," Dr. Woo greeted in flawless Japanese. "Well then, who do I have the pleasure of dealing with first?"

"Him," Naruto offered much to Sasuke's surprise. He was sure the blond would want to go first and get it over and done with. "He's been sweating so much. I think the leg's bothering him."

Sasuke's eyes widened. _How did he...?_

"Hmmm...good observation," Woo replied as he peered into Sasuke's flustered features. "Well then, young man. Let's this show going, eh? Come with me."

Once in the examining room, which he was surprised to see had quite a few state-of-the-art equipment you would see in a much bigger hospital; Sasuke was still trying to come to terms with Naruto's surprising statement. He was sure he had managed to mask his agony from everyone, all thanks to bumping the side of the side of the sink in the bathroom a little too hard earlier. His cry of pain was hidden with a bite of his upper arm; stifling the cry while tears sprang to his eyes and he nearly fell to a floor that was far from completely hygienic. It was one of the reasons he had remained in the bathroom for so long because he literally could not move a muscle for a while. He had watched in horror as a spot of blood blossomed and began to spread as he lifted his shorts to examine the damage; a sign that whatever healing might have started was not going to be as fast as he would like.

"Well, however did the first treatment must be commended for a job well done," Woo was saying as he and his assistant nurse began to remove the soiled dressings, while numbing the area with an injection to properly access the damage. "No signs of compartment syndrome and you are able to flex your toes all right? Yes? Circulation is good, yes?"

Sasuke did as he was told and the doctor nodded in satisfaction. As Woo began asking questions about any symptoms of dizziness or fainting experienced, all Sasuke longed to know was when he'd be able to walk properly again.

"Ah, that," Woo replied when the question was finally posed. "I would like to take an x-ray actually just to see the extent of the wound; although from what I've seen so far, it doesn't look like you're going to be in any real mortal danger. If you don't put too much strain on it for the next few days, before you can begin your physical therapy, I don't see why you shouldn't be done with that thing..."

'That thing' being the crutch.

"...in about eight weeks...if not less."

_Eight weeks?_ That was an _eternity_!

"Now then, lie still and let us do the x-ray and finish up the stitching and dressing, eh?"

As Sasuke resigned himself to his fate, Naruto waited outside with a dull sense of humiliation and disbelief at what had transpired earlier. Just what the hell had he been thinking offering a truce to that bastard anyway? Of course Sasuke wouldn't just say "oh yes! let's be friends now! Let's shake hands and sing off into the sunset." That would have been so out of character for a guy who only knew the words "Gudan!" or "Do as I say or get your head whacked!"

_Stupid. Stupid. Stupid._

He should have known with the way Sasuke's eyes had become watchful and guarded; should have known from the body language with the way he had stiffened at the offer. There was just no way to relax around a guy like that; no way at all. He definitely hadn't been kidding when he told Sasuke that just 'thinking' about something decent to say to him was a headache-inducing exercise.

"Is he inside?" came the sudden soft question that had him looking up with a start of surprise.

Itachi was leaning against the wall at the corner where this hall led to the main one. In the brighter noon light, Naruto could clearly see the strain on the older brother's features, and for some reason, his heart clenched with pity for him. He had no idea what Itachi must have gone through in his life, but really...Naruto was sure he would have wanted to be in the room with his baby brother right now; maybe to give him support or something. However, with the way Sasuke's been acting...

"Yeah, just took him in," he replied with a small smile. "Come sit down. You don't have to stand there."

"Thanks for the offer," Itachi replied with a matching smile. Unlike Sasuke, he had no qualms sitting right beside Naruto, and the blond found himself glad for that. For a long minute, they sat in companionable silence, though Itachi was leaning forward with his hands clasped tightly between his spread thighs; that same strained expression still on his visage.

"I hope he'll be able to walk properly again," he finally admitted quietly, and Naruto winced at the insinuation. Technically, it was his fault for that wound, but then again, his shoulder was not exactly a hundred percent either. Where was his pity?

"I hope your shoulder gets better too," Itachi added with a twitch of his lips that had the blond's features reddening as if his thoughts had been read. "You both really did a number on each other, didn't you?"

"We had to," Naruto replied with a pout. "One of us had to die, remember?"

"True. Very true...and I'm glad you spared his life, Naruto. I really am."

Naruto felt his entire being burn with embarrassment at the sincere look of gratitude thrown his way. He scratched the bridge of his nose and tried to look at any place but those dark eyes that seemed to see right through his soul.

"Meh...didn't see a need for it," he muttered bashfully. "Since he was technically down and out. I swear that Snake Dude was just...brr." He shuddered at the recollection of that bastard's clammy touch on his skin back in the dojo and the way those eyes had looked so serpentine and evil-ish.

"I know what you mean," Itachi agreed. "Orochimaru's tastes are...different to say the least."

"No kidding."

Another comfortable silence fell...only this time, there seemed to be a lot of questions hidden within; questions that both men were eager to query each other about and none was sure of where to begin. Finally, Itachi took the initiative and cleared his throat.

"Can I be open with you, Naruto?"

"Huh?"

"Can I ask you a few questions if you don't mind?"

"Uum...sure...?"

Itachi sighed and rubbed his temple gently. "Be honest with me...have you contemplated leaving us at any point in time?"

Naruto started as if goosed, eyes widening in surprise before lowering his gaze and biting his lower lip hard. What the hell could he say? Yes, he had planned on doing it, but he sure as hell hadn't expected Itachi to have noticed it already. Sheesh. This dude was way too sharp.

"You don't have to answer me, I figured out already," came the quiet reply. "I would have thought the same thing if I was in your position. Trust me. I understand where you are coming from. This is not your fight, and you have no stake in the matter, correct?"

"That's about right..."

"But what will you do when you leave? Have you thought about that?"

"I'll do like I've always done," Naruto replied with a shrug. "Become a journeyman again. Wander from place to place until I save up enough money to maybe hide out in Europe for a while. I know Orochimaru still wants my head because I'm an escaped convict..."

"Let's not forget the Bakufu."

"Wha...? I have no business with them anymore."

Itachi gave a wan smile. "If Orochimaru's forces cannot find you, do you not think he'll seek their help to root you out again? When they realize you're still alive, they're no doubt going to seek their revenge on Kojima's death."

"You knew Kojima?" Naruto asked incredulously.

"Not personally, but Asuma did tell me particulars about your case, which was quite tragic. I am sorry for the loss of your girlfriend."

Naruto shrugged lightly; wondering why the hell Asuma felt it necessary to tell every damn person about his personal affairs. "It's cool. It happened a long time ago anyway."

(three years and counting...and sometimes it still feels like it was only yesterday)

"I did a background check on Masataka Kojima and found out something quite interesting."

"What's that?"

"He was apparently the nephew of Ryoichi Ikegami." When Naruto looked blank at the name, Itachi expounded. "He is the current _kumichō_ of the Bakufu Syndicate."

Naruto's features drained of color and he felt his heart slam hard within his chest. _No...fucking...way!_ "Are you serious?" he asked in a voice that sounded small and distant. "Are you sure it's that same Kojima?"

"No mistaking it. He is the son of Ikegami's youngest sister who passed away at childbirth. Ikegami raised Kojima as his son and was hoping he'd end up becoming a first lieutenant, but as you already know...Kojima did things his own way."

"Which is why he was never 'made'," Naruto muttered to himself; recalling all the drunken rants and raves from Kojima while he cursed his uncle (apparently) over not seeing his potential. It was all making sense now.

"So you see...you took the life of not just any member of the Bakufu, but the 'son' of its head. If they discover you're still alive and well..."

"All the more reason why I have to get the fuck away from here as far as possible and –

"And keep running away for the rest of your life, Naruto?" came the quiet question that halted his panicked thoughts. "Is that a way for anyone to live? To keep hiding in the shadows, always wondering when you'll be caught? I lived that like for almost ten years, Naruto, and I realized I was doing more harm than good. Look at what my cowardice did to my brother...what he has become."

His hands tightened even more as his pained gaze was now trained to the floor. "It's why I've made the decision to fight this time instead of waiting in the wings. It's why I have to leave him again, just so he can finally be free. It is why I am about to ask something quite selfish of me, Naruto."

"...what?" came the wary question. He didn't want to look into those eyes that were now pleading silently with him, and almost before Itachi opened his mouth, Naruto already had an idea of where this was going. "You want me to stay with your brother...and kinda protect him, right? Is that what you're gonna say?"

"My brother knows nothing of the real world per se, even you must have noticed that," Itachi replied. "His thinking and principles are archaic and distorted; no thanks to the life he must have lived under Orochimaru's thumb. Asuma did as best he could under the circumstances, and we are lucky he has been able to maintain some sort of humanity beneath the thick layers of self-righteousness and obligation to what quantifies as Sin and Redemption. I will not be around long enough to transition him to normalcy...so to speak, and I will need someone in my place. Haku, you know will and cannot do the job since he is so loyal to Sasuke. Shikamaru might be willing to help, but it is obvious that the connection between the two is minimal if anything else..."

"So me, right? Me the sinner who almost killed him and who wants to get the hell out of dodge has to stick around to be his babysitter?"

Itachi smiled. "You will both be each other's babysitters."

"Huh?"

"If you stick together...all of you...do you not think it's better chances of defeating any random enemies that come at you, than going at it alone? Also, I think that deep down inside...we all long for companionship and that feeling of being a part of something close and meaningful. So even if you cannot stand my brother, eventually you'll come to consider Haku, Shikamaru and even Karin, a part of your new family. At least that is my lofty hope."

Naruto sighed and ruffled his hair in frustation. "Gah...you're really putting me in a tight spot, man. I really don't want to hang around if I don't have to, but with that story you just told me about Kojima and his uncle..." He sighed again and lowered his head in resignation. "I get your point. But only until this whole thing is done...until he gets his revenge or whatever. After that, I'm gone, get it?"

Itachi's smile broadened. "That's fine with me, Naruto. By then...hopefully, he'll will have the mercy to remove your name from the criminal records and set you free."

"Eh?" Naruto raised his brow. "So you don't want to be in charge of the watchdogs when it's done?"

Itachi shook his head lightly. "Do you think I deserve to be its head?"

"Well...you are the older brother..."

"True, but Sasuke knows more about it than I do, and I have no doubt he'll make a great leader when the time comes. He's been through hell and back for that place, and deserves to rebuild it to our father's and ancestors' design." At the skeptical look Naruto gave him, Itachi explained with a soft chuckle. "Byaku-Shinkyou had only a few dungeons for the most hardened of criminals, not the labyrinth Orochimaru has built today. We never performed Gudan either. Prisoners were either sent to the electric chair as ordered by the courts or given a lethal injection. We had no torture chambers and there was no arena built to behead sinners. Byaku-Shinkyou despite its prisons; was a beautiful place where the Uchiha lived and flourished for centuries. Orochimaru has tainted its original purpose and that is what Sasuke has to recover and rebuild when he's in charge. If I am still alive by then...I will be more than willing to help as an advisor if he wants me to."

"What...what do you mean if you're still alive?" Naruto asked through lips that felt dry. "You're going to make it through this. You've lived this long, why should anything stop you now?"

"Because I'd be a fool to imagine that everything would go that smoothly in this next step. I am under no illusions that there is a very big target on my back, and if it means taking the bullet for my brother, I'll do it to get him to achieve his goal."

Naruto tried to swallow the hard lump that came to his throat while kicking himself inwardly for even getting emotional at something like this. It wasn't as if Itachi was his brother or anything; and there was really no reason for him to get this sentimental for someone he hardly knew...and yet he couldn't help it. The thought of this guy...this guy who was one of the nicest people he had ever met...dying over something so stupid.

"I don't get it," he whispered thickly. "I don't get why all the good folks have to die over something so...so...fucked up."

Itachi reached out to pat Naruto's head gently. "Life sucks sometimes, doesn't it?"

Naruto sniffled and nodded. "Yeah...you don't need to tell me that. I could write a book about it."

"And I'd read every single word."

They shared a light giggle before the sounds of voices and the eventual click of the door leading to Dr. Woo's office opened. Sasuke was being led out by the doctor and his nurse, and the guy looked a little out of it.

"Gave him some painkillers, so he's going to be a little on the fuzzy side for a while," Woo explained with a chuckle as Itachi reached out to take over. He began giving the older Uchiha a rundown of the treatments carried out as well as what to expect for the future.

Sasuke, who was definitely feeling light-headed, had no strength to tell Itachi to fuck off or to leave him alone. He willingly sank onto the bench beside his brother and leaned his head back to gather himself. He could vaguely hear someone saying 'it's my turn!" as if about to go get some candy and a bubble of hysterical laughter threatened to erupt from his gut.

(candy...how silly)

Unfortunately, it felt as if he was going to throw up instead, and he had to lean even further back to control the urge.

"Relax..." came the familiar soft voice that was a million miles away. "Just breathe deeply and it will pass."

It was Itachi, wasn't it? That voice...he could recognize it anywhere. Which only reminded him of something he had been meaning to ask all day.

(what...I...saw...)

_Why?_ Came the fuzzy thought laced with distorted images of two men lying on a futon in an embrace. _Why?_

(do...not...understand...)

"...why?"

"Hmm? What's that Sasuke?"

"Why?" Good grief. His voice sounded like he had a million cotton balls in his mouth. He could barely hear himself speak. "Why...you...Shisui...?"

"It's okay, Sasuke. You're just talking from the effects of the drugs. Just try to..."

Sasuke slapped away the hand that had tried to touch his forehead. He shook his head and tried to stop seeing two of his brothers. He had to clear his mind...to think...to find out why his brother was the way he was. Wasn't that why they had come here in the first place? To talk things out? Yes, that's right. They had to talk things out. Like brothers do.

"You...Shisui..." He coughed and took a deep breath. Man, the medication felt soooo fucking good. He could feel no pain...nothing at all. "Hugging...why...?"

Itachi was confused at this line of conversation. "What are you talking about, Sasuke?" Were the drugs really that potent? He eyed the small white paper bag Woo had given him, which was filled with prescription pain killers to help his brother. If there was any hallucinogenic in here, he was going to kill Sun Woo -

"You and Shisui were together in bed," Sasuke finally managed to blurt out a complete sentence. He tried to look angry, but his expression only came across as confused and slightly bewildered. "Why? Were you two in bed...together?"

The older was still a bit in the dark about the seemingly random question, when it suddenly clicked. Shisui had mentioned seeing Sasuke outside the door first thing in the morning, hadn't he? Sasuke had been acting as if they were both spawns of the devil all morning, hadn't he? It could only mean that...

_Shit._

"This isn't the time to discuss this," Itachi said quietly, while thinking fast on how to diffuse would could potentially be a explosive argument. "When you're sober and more in control of your thought processes, I will be glad to explain what you might or might not have seen."

"..sin..." Sasuke slurred as his head drooped as if suddenly too heavy to stay on his shoulders. "It's...a sin...you two...disgusting..."

Itachi winced inwardly and, not for the first time, cursed Orochimaru for what he had done to warp his brother's mind. "I'm sorry you feel that way, Sasuke. I-"

"Don't touch me...ever...again...you...sinner..."

"Sasuke..."

_(we are all sinners...you and I...)_

"Hate you...and Shisui..."

The name came out as a hiss before Sasuke finally succumbed to the effects of the drug with a heavy _thump_ against his brother's chest as he passed out. For a long minute, Itachi could only look into the features in repose, before feeling his heart break as a lone tear escaped the corner of his brother's eyes. He wiped it away gently and tasted its bitterness; vowing with all his heart that he would do his best to make his brother see that the concept of love and devotion did not have to come with pain and misery.

_Love_ was not disgusting or a sin and it was about time Uchiha Sasuke learned of how beautiful, _honest_, and sincere that potent emotion could be.


	20. 20: The Other Leaf

**Notes:** Eeek! Seems like it's been eons since I updated and I sincerely apologize for that. Real life is kicking me in the tushie, and it's been hard to sit down to churn out something worth reading. So hopefully this 'long' chapter makes up for the delay! As always, my sincere thanks to each and every single one of you (you know yourselves!) for taking the time to leave a line or two in commentary. I really do appreciate it! *hugs and smooches all around*

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><p><strong>Chapter 20: <strong>

**The Other Leaf**

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><p><em>The depths of the hearts<em>

_Of humankind cannot be known_

_But in my birthplace_

_The plum blossoms smell the same_

_As in the years gone by_

_-Ki no Tsurayuki_

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><p><em>Sasuke: <em>

I lifted my lashes to unnerving solitude.

I was still in the clinic, that pungent antiseptic smell - common in all medical facilities - filling my lungs with every breath I took. With a light grunt, I sat up and tried to gather myself; a fruitless attempt to remember how the hell I ended up out here in the first place. The last thing I remember was being examined by that doctor while being pricked with some kind of medication to numb the pain. Unfortunately, any other further thinking was thwarted with the incessant drummer who seemed intent on driving me insane with the thunderous noise ricocheting within my skull. Aside from the splitting headache, I could have been the only living thing left on the planet for there was no simply no other sound around me.

Absolutely _nothing. _

There was not even the familiar (and perhaps comforting) _whirr_ of the cooling system or muted voices from any other occupant in the vicinity. I glanced to my left to appraise the narrow hallway devoid of life. The nursing station was still there, with seemingly nothing out of place. However, there was no nurse behind the desk (had there been one when we arrived?), and Dr. Woo's office door was closed as well.

Where the hell was everyone?

Reaching for my crutch, I struggled to my feet and began to hobble toward the exit; assuming that my brother and the blond blabbermouth had decided to wait for me in the main lobby. However, with each haunting echo of the cane upon the slate linoleum floor, I felt a dull sense of trepidation at the notion that I was not going to see anyone...and I wasn't disappointed.

The waiting room was just as empty as the rest of the clinic. All the patients I had seen at my arrival had left as if in a rush. Why? Because magazines and newspapers were still left open as if they had been discarded quickly. A bright, colorful toy truck lay on its side with its wheels spinning noiselessly along with several marbles that lay scattered around the floor. The small mounted television was still on, but there was only soundless noise on the screen with no images to beam to the vacant room. The receptionist area was no different. Papers and documents remained in their place, but the swivel chairs behind the counter were without occupants. Cups of beverages still sat waiting to be consumed, and there was a half-eaten sandwich beside a pile of beige folders, where a small line of ants were beginning to march toward it.

Somehow knowing this was going to be pointless, I still leaned over the counter to reach for the archaic-looking telephone; having to balance precariously in my attempt to do so. As expected, there was no dial tone, no matter how hard I punched the buttons to get some kind of reception.

_Great. Now what? _

I lowered the receiver and looked outside, where it was still blindingly bright. Feeling a surge of hope as I noticed that cars and humans were still in existence (as evidence of them moving and going about their business), I made my way toward the glass doors to at least find the mini-bus. Perhaps Itachi and Naruto were outside after all, and lo and behold, my assumptions were true! The two were leaning against the bus licking ice creams...well at least Naruto was, my brother was scooping his from a small plastic cup – while laughing and talking about something together. I ignored the light twinge of jealousy to hit me at how relaxed and comfortable they looked as I placed my hand on the handle to twist it open. Goodness knows I was going to give Itachi a piece of my mind for not waiting for me and –

_Huh?_

I rattled the handle a little harder.

_What the fuck?_

I shook it harder still, but it just wouldn't budge! I released it and took a deep breath; telling myself that I had perhaps turned it the wrong way. However, another frustrating minute of twisting the damn knob this way and that _still_ yielded nothing. I couldn't get out! I could see no obvious locks, and besides, why the hell would they lock a patient inside the hospital even if they had all gone for a lunch break? This was ridiculous!

With irritation and growing anger (fear), I began to bang on the door to get their attention. Surely Itachi would have to hear me or at least look this way.

_Help me!_ I screamed noiselessly; banging and slamming my fist against the glass with every once of strength in my body, and yet with all the noise I was sure I was making, it still seemed as if I was expending unnecessary energy. Deep down inside, I _knew_ he _couldn't _hear me. I knew he'd _never_ hear me.

_That's because I'm the only one who cares about you, Sasuke. _

I shuddered and felt a million goose bumps break out on my skin at the barely audible yet oh-so-familiar hiss of that slithering voice. I spun around and felt the scream lodged in my throat as I noticed his shadow first before the lanky frame made the turn to block out the flood of light coming from the adjunct hallway.

Disgust, like bitter bile, filled my tongue and made me want to gag. I pressed myself against the door as if hoping it would suck me in and hide me from this horrific scene.

He was dressed in his favorite black robe with the gold trimmings, his walking stick with the diamond serpent head alive with its ruby eyes trained squarely on me. It hissed at me...leered in jest as its master glided closer still toward me. It was impossible to see his feet, but with the way he moved, it definitely did seem as if he was simply _gliding_ across the floor.

_The outside world is cruel and unjust, my dear Sasuke,_ the apparition cajoled as it smiled to reveal its fangs. _Come back to where you belong. Byaku-Shinkyou is yours and mine. We do not need him. We've never needed him..._

_No,_ I screamed within and scrambled desperately for the handle again. _No! No! No! I am not ready for you yet. Not in this condition. You cannot take me back yet! I won't go back!_

_It is pointless to resist,_ came the low hiss as his pale hand, with those inky black long fingernails, reached out for me. _Come back to me...back to where you belong...back into my arms, Sasuke. Come to..._

**NO!**

It was with a desperate wail of anguish and frustrated fury that I lashed out with my crutch to perhaps swat him aside, but the sudden sensation of something warm and comforting upon my forehead had me lifting my lashes (hadn't even been aware I had squeezed them shut) to look into the concerned and wonderful visage of my precious manservant hovering over me.

"Sasuke-sama? Are you all right?"

_I would think not,_ I wanted to say. _I just had the most bizarre nightmare yet._

But my lips wouldn't move. His face and presence had never meant more to me than at this moment, and if I could wrap my arms around him and hug him tightly, I'd do so.

"You must have had a nightmare," he was saying as he suddenly leapt out of view, only to return seconds later with a cup in his hand. "Sit up a little, Sasuke-sama. You should drink this."

I allowed him to place a gentle, but strong hand behind my neck as he eased me to an upright position. With silent gratitude, I downed the cool liquid, feeling relieved as it quenched a throat that felt parched and in need of refreshment. When he was satisfied I was done, he released me with a small smile on his face.

"How do you feel now?"

I nodded and tried to smile back, but it felt more like a grimace. "Alive," I finally muttered as I took a good look at him. They must have finally found a shop that sold kimonos because he was back in his familiar garb, though it was (thankfully) not as feminine as the ones he had in Byaku Shinkyou. This looked manlier with its brown and black theme which suited him quite well surprisingly. His hair had not been cut as I had overheard them discussing the other day, but it was in a ponytail all the same.

"Did you have fun shopping?" I asked, while motioning for him to refill the cup. I was still thirsty.

"It was fun, Sasuke-sama!" he replied; hopping to his feet to do as told. His voice echoed from the small kitchen as I surveyed my dismal lodgings with an inner sigh. However, I did notice that Haku had done a few things here and there to brighten things up a little. Knowing my love for the gardens that graced my childhood home, he had purchased a miniature ficus penda bonsai within an antique vase as well as two small pots of pink orchids and white dendrobium. The bonsai he kept in a corner of the room, but the other plants were outside on the balcony, which did improve the view. He must have also done some house work because the meager furniture we had as well as the walls seemed a little 'brighter' and cleaner. It didn't smell as musty and dusty either. There was a fresh pine aroma that made breathing a little more tolerable.

He had also opened the blinds revealing a twilight skyline where the faint sounds of cars and people below seeped through the small gap made with the sliding door being ajar. It made me wonder just how long I had been asleep...or even how I ended up here in the first place. As in my dream, the last thing I remember was being given some kind of shot to numb the pain in my leg...which by the way was now throbbing a little. Guess the medication was finally wearing off.

Glancing to my right, I noticed that our small television was on, and I assume Haku must have been watching it because there was some ridiculous variety show where contestants were asked to wade around in a tub of soap suds in an effort to win some kind of prize. I rolled my eyes as a hairy fat guy wearing a hideous and embarrassing neon green bikini ended up winning. It didn't help that he began to hop up and down causing just about everything to jiggle in the most unpleasant way possible.

Urgh. This was considered _entertainment_?

"...took us to some great stores!" Haku was still recounting as he returned to kneel beside my futon with cup in hand. As I drank, he blabbed on and on about his fun day with Karin and Shikamaru; of how they had visited different stores in the shopping district and stocked up on new clothing and food (which was a good thing because if I had to eat one more cup of ramen, I'd go mad). He praised Karin's ability to haggle with shopkeepers, especially those who thought they could take advantage of them. Karin was apparently quite fluent in the language of the natives and must have visited the area before since she seemed to navigate around town effortlessly.

"We bought you only one complete outfit, Sasuke-sama. I don't really understand the clothes sizes here, so I couldn't really buy any more. Itachi-sama said that when you wake up and feel much better, then you and Naruto-kun can go buy your own clothes yourselves. It would be better that way."

_How magnanimous of him,_ I wanted to sneer as echoes of my dream and how he had ignored me came rushing back. I rubbed my forehead and shook it off. This was no time to focus on a situation I couldn't control. Besides, the brief flash of a shopping expedition with Naruto was headache inducing in itself.

/...so...truce?/

_That's right...I haven't even given him an answer yet, have I?_

"What day is it?" I asked aloud instead.

"Friday," Haku replied automatically. He was back to watching his show; rapt and apparently cheering for one of the contestants; a pretty young girl who could pass for Haku's sister actually. But wait...had he said _Friday_?

"...I was out for almost a whole day?" I asked incredulously.

"Uh huh. Ooooh!" Haku groaned as the girl fell off the narrow bridge she was supposed to be balancing on. "She was this close!"

"Who brought me in?"

"Itachi-sama. You were out cold, Sasuke-sama."

"Hn..."

"_Su go!_" Haku suddenly wailed and waved his hands as the audience members chanted out the same thing. Consider it the equivalent of '_banzai_' in Japanese.

"What the hell are you doing?" I finally asked in exasperation. "Why are you watching that ridiculous thing?" Now some idiot was trying to balance a champagne glass on his head while walking across a wobbling rope bridge. Good grief!

Haku glanced at me with a pout. "Naruto-kun said the best way to learn a language quickly is by watching the television shows here. He says it's how he learned how to speak Korean when he was in Japan."

Of course. Why would I have expected anything different? Trust Naruto to teach Haku the most stupid way to learn anything.

"I'm sure there are better shows than that you could watch," I muttered, but Haku was not paying any attention to me because the commercials were over and it was game time again. _Sigh._ Why did I get the feeling that ordering him around here would not be the best of ideas? Hadn't Naruto told me the obvious back at the clinic? We were no longer within the walls of Byaku-Shinkyou. Out here, we were all on the same level playing field, so if Haku wanted to kill a few more brain cells by watching senseless Korean variety shows, who was I to stop him?

Unfortunately, nearly three hours later, I was reluctantly hooked...not on the variety show, but on a soap opera/drama type thing which Haku had started watching yesterday while I was in my comatose state. I really had no idea what the storyline was about (though Haku tried his best to narrate as best he could), but I needn't have worried so much. It was a riveting tale set in the era of the Three Kingdoms, and there was something rather cool (though slightly ridiculous) about the way the actors spoke and carried themselves. They do tend to over exaggerate things, don't they? Talk about melodrama. Since I was more fluent in the language, I had to translate a few things for Haku, and I had to admit...it felt...well..._good_ to interact with him in such a manner. Like an eager child, he'd pepper me with questions, and I'd do my best to answer them, while throwing in a few Korean words here and there that he could pick up on his own.

In Byaku-Shinkyou, I did not watch television and though I would have rather spent an evening listening to him playing the _shamisen_ while reading, it was slowly dawning on me that he could have other interests besides keeping me entertained all the time. I realized I had never really asked Haku what things he did like to do outside of serving me; yet another blimp in our so-called relationship. In this new life of ours, I guess it was going to be up to me to get to know him on a more personal level, and learning about his love for television...to be more specific – soap operas (and stupid variety shows) – Haku was revealing a little more of the real him. There was an inexplicable glow on his features that I had never seen before; an aura of 'freedom' that made him even more beautiful...and not just on the outside.

I could appreciate that.

It was evening now, and between eating the quick dinner Haku had prepared (I was pleased to see it was a familiar Japanese meal thanks to a store that specialized in them), we were only bothered by Karin and Itachi. Karin – to see how I was doing and to show me a way to change my wound dressing quickly and as pain-free as possible before administering the medication prescribed to me, and later Itachi, who stayed for a few minutes to check up on me.

It was a little awkward, I have to confess. His presence not only brought my dream to the forefront, but had me recalling my decision to confront him about his relationship with Shisui. However, with Haku being in the room and the drama show being on at the same time (and I really had no inclination to stop watching especially since they were at a mesmerizing battle scene), I decided not to bring it up.

If he was going to mock me about my sudden love for Korean dramas, he did not say it openly. Instead he watched with us for a while, and just as I had done, spent some time answering whatever questions Haku fired at him as patiently as possible. Somehow, that blond loudmouth entered into the conversation, and though I had not asked, I was still curious to know how he was doing; after all, he had gone to the clinic to get checked out as well.

"...to tell you thank you," Itachi was saying.

"He liked it?" Haku all but squealed in delight. "It's just plain miso soup though..."

"Plain or not, Naruto enjoyed it all, and said he wouldn't mind having some more in the morning."

"Then I'll make some more for him!"

"I'm sure he'll appreciate it, considering he's been out of it for a while thanks to all the pain medication he was given." Was Itachi looking at me? I felt he was considering he had raised his voice a little as if making sure I heard it loud and clear. So why the hell was my face suddenly burning at the notion that he knew I was interested? Damn him.

"Poor Naruto-kun," Haku was saying. "He was speaking gibberish too."

"That medication is powerful stuff," Itachi agreed. "Makes you say things you don't really mean..."

_Hmm._

Might be my imagination, but again, it appeared he was directing this at me, and I threw a bewildered glance in his direction. However, his gaze wasn't trained on me as I had assumed. He seemed more interested with the television, which was now showing a commercial for a women's hair removal product. All the same I felt a little uneasy. Was he trying to tell me something?

"We're going to have a little meeting in the morning if you're up to it," Itachi said as he prepared to say his farewells for the night half an hour later. "It will be held in our room -"

"Why there?" I blurted out before I could stop myself. The idea of sitting in that place...on that floor where...just _no._

"Because it's more conducive there," came the quiet reply. There was a pause and then... "Do you have a problem with my room, Sasuke?"

I wasn't sure of why that question seemed loaded (making me wonder if he knew that I knew that he was...well...), but I only shrugged and tried to act nonchalant. "I just wanted to know why we had to have it there, that's all."

Though I wasn't looking directly at him (the main character had been stabbed in the torso during the battle by the emperor...fucking traitor), I did manage to catch the quick flicker of amusement that filled Itachi's visage before it was replaced with the familiar noncommittal expression. "Shisui has a lot of things we can't lug about, so we have to have the meeting there. Sorry...if you don't find it too comfortable."

"I'll manage," I bit out tightly. _Now_, I was sure he _knew_. Did he really think it was _funny?_

I all but glared at him as he left with a polite bow; faintly aware of just how tense and on edge I was (my shoulders were literally aching!) until Haku suggested we take a bath together. My initial reaction was to refuse the offer, but considering the incident that happened the other morning, and risking being harassed by Naruto (and what was the need to be 'ashamed' in front of a servant who had seen me naked many times already), I sighed and agreed with a light shrug.

With some careful maneuvering, we found a way to get my now cumbersome body out the door and toward the bathroom. The hallway was mercifully deserted, though I could hear voices behind the closed doors: music from Karin's room, loud laughter from Naruto and Shikamaru's room, and barely audible voices behind my brother's room. At least they were talking...unless they talked while they...

_Do Not Think About That!_

"Are you okay, Sasuke-sama?"

"Hmm?"

Haku appeared uncertain. "You looked annoyed all of a sudden. Is it your leg again?"

I shook my head and tried to smile at him. "I'm fine. Just thought of something...unpleasant, that's all."

"Ah...okay..." He didn't sound too convinced, but he did push open the door to the bathroom which was actually big enough to host more than one person at a time in it; keeping his doubts to himself.

Akin to a typical Japanese bath house, there was an anteroom for your personal belongings to be kept. It was nothing more than a rickety wooden shelf with wicker baskets in each divided section, where Haku (shameless as ever) stripped quickly and tied a small white towel around his waist, while humming the theme song to the drama show we had just watched. Efficiently, he helped me into a towel as well, though it was slightly tricky considering the floor (with its ugly green tiles) was a little slippery and I nearly lost my footing a few times. Eventually, we made it to the section where we could sit on plastic stools to scrub off the grime from the day. Unfortunately, 'sitting' didn't really apply to me as I was more like half sitting/half leaning against the wall since I had to stretch out my right leg. Not a very comfortable position, but it was better than nothing.

_Aaaaah...feels good..._

I had almost forgotten how great Haku's massages were, and all but melted into a puddle of pleasure as I lowered my head to give him better access to my back. He was careful not to aggravate bruises that were yet to fully heal, and knew just the right areas to touch to make me feel good. I had to bite back helpless groans as I adjusted the towel on my lap to hide what was gradually becoming obvious. Haku, bless his clueless soul, was still humming away happily and unaware of the effect his actions were having on me. I adjusted myself as discreetly as possible and felt the need to speak; perhaps hoping it would kill this embarrassing situation.

"When you're done..." I began quietly.

The humming stopped. "What's that, Sasuke-sama?"

"I said...when you're done...I'll...um... wash your back too."

I think I must have shocked him to the core with this statement because I could literally hear him gasp and drop the sponge he had been using to the floor.

"Uum...you...you don't have to, Sasuke-sama," he finally stuttered when he could find his voice again. I glanced over my shoulder to see him looking downcast and wringing the sponge between his hands. His face was as red as I'd ever seen, and I tried to blame it on the steam emanating from the main bathroom with the waiting tub. "I'm supposed to serve..."

"We're no longer in Byaku-Shinkyou," I explained with a small smile. "So you don't have to keep treating me like I'm your master -"

"But you _are_ my master," Haku interrupted vehemently. He looked up with what seemed like panic in his eyes. "Are you getting tired of me, Sasuke-sama? Is that it? Do you want to get rid of me?"

"No...no, that's not it," I replied quickly with a firm shake of my head. "I would never let you go...unless you wanted to."

He shook his head again; a fiery glow of stubborn determination in his eyes. "Then I am yours until my dying day, Sasuke-sama. I made a vow to be by your side no matter what, so I'm staying...for as long as you want me to..." He trailed off with downcast eyes.

_Haku...do I really deserve someone like you by my side?_

Feeling my heart twinge with such intense gratitude for his loyalty and companionship, I was unaware of my hand reaching out to cradle his chin gently; more to force him to look up and to perhaps thank him for being so generous with his complete devotion...but the sudden sound of laughter and the loud bang of the door opening had us both turning around like deer caught in headlights.

_Shit!_

You could hear a pin drop...to say the least.

"Whooops!" Naruto finally broke the silence after we had all gawked at each other in shock for an eternity of a second. "Didn't realize we were interrupting _something_."

The bastard was smirking with a mischievous glint in his eyes that had every fiber of my being burning with mortification at being caught in a somewhat compromising position.

Shikamaru – who was behind him – cleared his throat and lifted a hand in apology. "Sorry, door was unlocked. We didn't realize it was occupied. We'll just be leaving -"

"Why?" Naruto replied as he shrugged off the hand Shikamaru had placed on his arm. "I have a right to take a shower too you know. I'm dirty. Been sweating like a goddamn pig all day."

"There's plenty of room for you, Naruto-kun," Haku piped up with what was obvious relief in his tone. He grinned and motioned toward the other empty stools. "You can join us!"

_No, he cannot!_ I wanted to scream or kick Haku off his stool in disbelief. What the hell did he think he was doing?

"See? Plenty of room," Naruto agreed as he grinned in kind to his partner-in-crime. "Let's hurry, Shika. I don't wanna miss the movie. Pass me the towel."

I turned away to reach for the shampoo, angry to find my fingers were trembling as I picked up the plastic bottle, while their casual banter continued to float over me. So what if he saw me nude? Besides my mother, father (probably), Itachi and Haku, no one else had seen me in this state before, and I had never – in my life – felt as vulnerable and exposed in every way possible, to these two relative strangers.

_This. Was. Humiliating!_

"...lock the door in case Karin comes wandering in and gets an eyeful," Naruto was saying as I felt and heard him walk past me. I stubbornly kept my head lowered and scrubbed at my hair even harder than before; perhaps wanting to rip out the scalp in an attempt to focus on what I was doing instead of the guy(s) now sitting barely inches away from me.

"Want me to wash your back first, Shika?" Naruto was asking.

_/Want me to wash your back, Sasuke? / _

I shivered at the unspoken words; memories of my shameful antics in the safety of my bathroom, back at Byaku-Shinkyou, suddenly returning with a vengeance. The very idea of Naruto touching me that intimately...

**NEVER.**

"Sure...can you do that with one hand though?"

"Hardy har har. I can move the other one, just not too much. Hey, take it easy when you're washing mine. Don't get the bandages wet."

"Gotcha."

The jarring scrape of stools across the floor had me looking up a little. I could see their feet and it was worrisome just how close those two were to each other. However, a part of me mocked my concern, since Haku was not too far from me either. Coupled with the fact that I had been touching my manservant, was it any wonder Naruto and Shikamaru must have assumed something wrong when they came in? How had Haku and I appeared to them? Would Naruto assume that I was really _that way_ after all? That all his allusions to me being interested in members of my own sex were finally coming to light in his warped mind?

God...what a fucking mess.

"I'll rinse you off, Sasuke-sama," Haku was saying as he rose to reach for the hand shower. I bit my lower lip to control my cry of shock as a douse of water pricked my heated skin like a million icy needles. Haku apologized and adjusted the temperature quickly; though I was sure Naruto and his companion were laughing at my helpless reaction. With hands that still trembled, I rinsed off my face, which forced me to finally look up, and I immediately regretted that decision.

They were indeed close to each other, with Naruto's back bowed a little to give Shikamaru access to it. Shikamaru, whose black hair was always in a ponytail, had been released to cascade down to his shoulders, and I had to admit it made him look a little different (not as reserved I think). Naruto's usual spiky locks were now plastered to his scalp and cheeks; reminiscent of that first night within The Pit during their initial cleansings.

The second thing to catch my attention was their backs etched with scars...welts they must have received from being flogged during their incarceration. While Shikamaru's was all but faded, Naruto's were a little more obvious, and I felt something heavy sink into the pit of my stomach as I watched that flesh treated gingerly. Shikamaru seemed to know just where to scrub without causing any more damage to his companion. For in addition to the scars, there were also the bruises and wounds sustained not just from our fight, but from the battle with Hidan.

_It's the price you pay for the sin you committed, _a voice within me reasoned. _Every scar...every bruise...you deserved. Those are your battle scars, aren't they, Naruto? Literally and figuratively. In some weird way, I envy them. While your scars are visible...mine will always remain hidden._

He seemed to stiffen (or maybe it was just my imagination playing tricks again), before throwing me a glance over his shoulder with a bemused frown on his visage. Had he heard me? Or was I being naïve enough to believe that we had some sort of telepathic communication thing going especially after that incident at the arena?

_Stop being so stupid,_ I chided myself and closed my eyes to allow the water Haku was still pouring on me to wash away the few soapy residues left. That was nothing more than a fluke.

"Hey, Haku," came the sudden call from Naruto just as Haku and I were getting ready to head to the tub for a much-needed soak. "Did you watch _Heavenly Kingdom_ tonight?"

"Oh yes!" came the thrilled reply which had me sighing in resignation. I already had an idea of where this conversation was going. "Sasuke-sama and I watched it together."

_Did you really have to mention that?_

"Eeeeh?" Naruto drawled lazily as he sat up to motion for Shikamaru to turn around. With blatant amusement on his visage, he began to scrub his friend's back though he was still looking at me. I had no idea why I was glad to see he had the small towel draped over his lap to prevent us from seeing his privates. Thank God for brief moments of decorum where necessary.

"I didn't know you watched T.V," he added with a grin.

"Sasuke-sama loved it!" Haku revealed; which promptly had my cheeks flaring with color. Where the fuck was my crutch? I had to get out of here. "He was translating some of the words and teaching me the language as well. Weren't you, Sasuke-sama?"

"I would like to head to the tub now," I replied tightly, while attempting to rise to my feet. "You are free to keep chatting about the drama, but..._shit!_"

"Sasuke-sama!"

Gravity betrayed me as my feet suddenly began to slide awkwardly along the wet floor. I knew it was inevitable I was going to fall on my ass or bang my already throbbing leg against something again, and mentally bracing for the pain, I desperately tried to steady myself (pathetically I might add) against the tiled wall. However, when even clutching onto that failed, it was the sudden and every unexpected sensation of strong arms encircling my waist, which had me stumbling back into something warm and definitely not as painful as the floor might have been.

"Goddamnit!" came the muttered grunt beneath me. "You could have at least worn slippers, and how the fuck do you plan to be in a tub anyway with your leg like that?"

It was Naruto, and the idiot had used himself as a cushion to stop my fall. I would have praised him in gratitude if it wasn't for the dawning realization that the towel I had draped around my waist had come undone...Naruto's was lying inches away from my foot...and that sensation of something familiar... hard and very much with a mind of its own was now nudging against my backside in a rather disconcerting way...

_Oh...oh God!_

I all but scrambled off him quickly; ignoring the pressure I was inflicting on my leg and grabbing my wet towel to hide a shameful and embarrassing natural reaction to the situation.

_Natural?_

What the hell was natural about getting an erection from being in such close contact to another naked _male_? Getting a back scrub from Haku didn't count. At least he hadn't gone out of his way to press his body against mine. But then again, considering the last time I had been this close to another naked body, it had involved a rather passionate encounter (with a female, I might add). It made a suitable excuse for why it was behaving this way. That was all. Memories of that night were only being triggered at this moment.

Now, if I could only control my racing heart beat and stop feeling as if I was blushing up a storm, we'd be in business.

Haku was busy fretting over both of us, while Shikamaru assisted Naruto back to his feet with queries of concern.

_I should be the one doing that..._

I honestly hadn't meant to look at him, but for a heartbeat of a moment, our eyes did meet and I could have sworn there was an expression that was a mixture of genuine bemusement and ...and...and _what_ exactly? It was hard to decipher what that other emotion was (though it appeared to be an upgrade from the warm looks he had given me in the bus when we first met). Either way, it was enough to send my cheeks burning hotter still. I was really beginning to loathe just how much he was affecting me in this way. Thankfully, he was the first to look away; his voice casual as he replied to the concerned question from his friend. The moment between us was broken, and I was glad for it for I could breathe a little easier again. I didn't need to have this new problem weighing on my already troubled mind.

"Come on," he was saying to Shikamaru. "Rinse me off so we can go back."

"Won't you use the tub?" Haku asked.

"It's cool. You and your master can use it. I need to go lie down," Naruto replied and immediately grimaced as he favored his shoulder. A sharp pang hit me then as I realized he must have landed on it in an attempt to stop me from falling.

_This would be the perfect time to thank him, don't you think?_

And though my mind screamed this, I couldn't get my fucking lips to form the words! I could only listen to Haku thank him on my behalf, and for his efforts, Naruto gave him a warm smile and pinched his cheek gently. With a final reminder for Haku to not forget making his delicious miso soup in the morning, our uninvited guests eventually left, leaving behind the sweet scent of the soaps and shampoos they had used as well as a stifling silence between Haku and I.

Suddenly the idea of soaking in a tub didn't look too appealing, and Naruto was right anyway...how was I planning to sit in it without messing up the dressings?

"Sasuke-sama?" came the tentative call of my name that had me looking at my companion. Haku wasn't really focused on me, and he was back to wringing the wash cloth between his hands, which was a sign he was about to ask me something I wasn't sure I wanted to answer.

With an inner sigh, I replied warily. "Go ahead, Haku."

"Why don't you like Naruto-kun?" came the blunt question that just about threw me off guard.

I flailed for an answer. "I...I mean…"

"You don't talk to him much, and when you do, it always seems like you're mad at him," Haku continued in a rush of words; his eyes brimming with unshed tears. "He's really trying to be nice to you, Sasuke-sama, and he's funny and great to spend time with, if you get to know him. He...he's got a good heart...and he was the one who told me to take care of you when he assumed he was going to die at Gudan. I...I just don't understand why you two can't...can't...be fri...friends..."

He sniffled and angrily scrubbed at his eyes before bowing his head to me. "I'm sorry for speaking out of line, Sasuke-sama, but...I just wanted to say that and get it off my chest." He looked up at me with eyes that were reddened with his sorrow, and it made me realize just how much this must have weighed on his heart and mind all this time. He hesitated and looked as if he wanted to say something else, but eventually lapsed into miserable silence and went about his duties like an automaton while I struggled to come up with a reasonable excuse for my actions.

_He is a sinner._

_He mistook me for a female._

_He is crude, crass, uncouth, and incredibly stupid...sometimes._

_He has a penchant to upset me with most of the things he says and does._

_He makes me uneasy with the way he looks at me._

_He wants to see right through me and that worries me more than anything else._

Unfortunately, saying any of this aloud would give Haku the impression that I was being petty and superficial; hence my decision to remain mute created an evening filled with uncomfortable and awkward pauses.

It took a lot of inner debating, much weighing of the pros and cons, much tossing and turning –as best I could – as my restless thoughts superseded the cobwebs of sleep. Finally, around two in the morning (and having stared long enough at the fucking ceiling); I decided I might as well get it over and done with. What was the use of keeping up with this charade? Again, I wasn't planning on becoming a Shikamaru clone anytime soon, but we definitely could try to be civil with each other by accepting the 'truce'. Hence, with that firm thought in mind and doing my best not to awaken my sleeping roommate, I made my way out of the room without the aid of the crutch. It would be too noisy, and besides, I could put a little weight on my leg now without rupturing any stitches. Progress was agonizingly slow, but I eventually reached Room #632; leaned heavily against it to catch my breath before lifting a hand to knock on it.

I would later blame my rash decision, to awaken him at an ungodly hour, on my medication. I was still experiencing some residual effects of it (having taken a little more than necessary thanks to the incident in the bathroom earlier), so even if he cursed me for bothering him, I would ignore it and try to take it all in stride. But what if Shikamaru answered the door instead? I wasn't sure I wanted to speak to the other man first. I really didn't need them both awake to hear my potential ramble.

_Good grief! Open the fucking door already!_

I knocked again, and this time I heard the barely audible sound of muffled voices and someone finally shuffling toward the door. I stepped back and rehearsed my words again, figuring it was going to be quick and painless. I would just get it over and done with and tell Haku about my 'escapade', so he wouldn't keep sulking around me. I couldn't deal with him in a depressed mood because it really could be fucking contagious.

There was the rattle of the lock...

_Ba-dum. Ba-dum. Ba-dum. Ba-dum._

(goddamn foolish heartbeat)

...and then the door creaking open slowly as if afraid of seeing what was behind it. I swallowed as a light sheen of sweat began to break out on my skin. Was I about to experience a panic attack? Or were the strains of my little trip across the hallway finally getting to me? Either way, a pair of cautious, sleep-induced blue eyes blinked slowly at me as if unsure of what they were seeing.

I opened my mouth to recite the words I had practiced while lying on my futon, but everything evaporated in a second at the husky, drawled words that slipped out of _his_ mouth.

"Are you sleepwalking?"

_Wha...?_

"What?" I squeaked out breathlessly; not quite sure where this was go-

"Your room is at the other end of the hallway," he continued with a barely stifled yawn. He opened the door a little wider to point in said direction as if I was that stupid not to know where my own room was. However, I was quick to notice that he was in a wrinkled plain orange tee shirt and a pair of black shorts tonight akin to what I was wearing...well not the same colors anyway. _Still!_ What the hell did that matter? He was distracting me from my original intentions!

"Listen," I begin with a lick of my lips and a deep breath taken. "Um...I..."

"You need help getting there?" he asked with a raised brow and a quick glance at my leg. "Ah...probably that's why you came by. You forgot your crutch and you need -"

_Oh, for crying out loud!_

"Will you just shut up for one second and let me say what I came here for?" I hissed in frustration.

Now both brows were raised and I could tell the sleep was fading quickly to be replaced with an expression that was definitely not going to make this easy if I kept up in this way. I spoke quickly and firmly.

"I wanted to thank you for helping...in the bathroom...when I was going to fall?" I ended with a question when it seemed like he wasn't making any attempt to remember what the hell had happened. Those damned blue eyes continued to watch me carefully, before they lowered and he scratched the back of his head. He finally looked up again, and there was no mistaking the hint of a smile that tugged the corner of his lips.

"Bit of a delayed reaction, ain't it?"

"What?"

"You woke me up at..." He looked back into his darkened room and then turned to me again; the smile now a little wider. "You woke me up at two-forty five in the morning just to thank me for something that happened last night? Geez. You really are something, aren't you? Why couldn't you tell me this in the morning...in daylight I mean?"

"I..." _I what?_

"What?" The smile became a knowing smirk. "You're embarrassed to be seen talking to me? Is that it?"

"Actually, I only did it because I didn't want to see Haku upset," I blurted out defensively...and immediately wished I hadn't because he literally seemed to pull away from me; an unreadable expression filling his visage.

"Ah...Haku, huh?" he finally muttered. "Otherwise, you wouldn't have taken the initiative to do so on your own, eh?"

"I didn't mean it like that..." I began hastily, but I knew I had screwed up in some way. It now seemed like the wall I had tentatively began to push aside to get to him, was now descending at a rapid rate.

"I know exactly what you mean, Sasuke," Naruto clipped. He was upset...no..._angry_ for some reason. I didn't understand why he would feel that way. "Give your precious Haku my thanks for having the balls to teach you how to become a decent human being. Besides, I don't need your fucking thanks. His was more than enough. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going back to bed."

He made to turn away, but I slammed a hand against the door jamb, effectively blocking his path with my outstretched arm. This motion forced me to move a little closer to him, but I couldn't be bothered with proximity issues at the moment. I had to make him _understand_ for God's sake. He had no idea how difficult this was for _me_!

"I didn't say it right," I grated out tightly. "What I meant to say was that Haku..." I shook my head. "Look forget about him, all right? You offered a truce at the clinic -"

"I take it back since you're such a dickwad -"

"...and I wanted to say yes...why do you have to insult me, you bastard?"

"You're insulting me too," he hissed back. Might I add we were pretty much arguing in harsh whispers so as not to wake up the rest of the floor. "You think it's fun having to listen to you calling me 'sinner, sinner, sinner' all the fucking time? Oh, and there's the bastard thing too."

"I am trying to be nice to you -"

"Try harder."

I banged a clenched fist against the door. This was _infuriating_! "What the fuck do you want me to do to prove it?"

He gave a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes and leaned forward...so close that I could feel his warm breath bathe my fevered flesh and flecks of gold swimming within those twin pools of blue. My irrational and frenzied thought was that it would take only one more step and those soft-looking lips...especially the lower one he was now biting ever so gently...were going to meet mine and then...and then...

(he wouldn't dare. He is just as disgusted as I am about the whole thing. He wouldn't dare think of doing something as sinful and humiliating as ki...ki...)

(but...I am curious...)

(curiosity killed the cat. Remember that)

(...what would it be like?)

(don't even entertain the thought)

(what would he taste like?)

_Sasuke...?_

(...just one more step and...)

_Sasuke...!_

(heh...who is the sinner now?)

Mocking laughter filled my head, and I was sure it sounded like Orochimaru's cackle of glee at the stray thoughts filtering through my mind. I groaned in misery and silently begged for forgiveness, and still my knees were beginning to feel a little weak; the faint buzzing in my head growing louder by the second. My vision swam and it was with trembling hands that I found myself reaching out to clutch his tee shirt; more to steady myself than anything. Gratefully, I wasn't shunned or pushed aside.

_Are you all right, Sasuke?_

It was him...he was the one calling my name, but it seemed to be miles away; disembodied...faint.

_Geesus. You shouldn't have come out without your goddamn crutch. Here...hang on to me..._

Somewhere, a door was opening. There was a new voice now; familiar...

"...think he's about to faint. Can you help me with him?"

They were talking and at the same time strong arms lifted me like a child to carry me off somewhere. I must have blacked out at the point, for the next time I opened my eyes, I was staring at the familiar uninspiring plain pattern of the ceiling in my apartment.

_A... dream?_

Perhaps it really had been nothing more than that, for that thin line between my dreams and reality were becoming even more blurrier with every passing day.

So why…_why_ was there this inexplicable ache in my heart at that notion? And what could it possibly mean?

* * *

><p>It's official, Naruto thought sullenly. Uchiha Sasuke has to be the most <em>perplexing<em> human being on the fucking _planet_.

Was he going on insane? Or did what happened last night _actually_ take place? Had Sasuke really come knocking at his door at two in the morning wanting to _thank_ him for the help rendered in the bathroom? Had he actually mentioned something about agreeing to the truce he initiated at the clinic? And what was with that expression on his face anyway? Why did Sasuke have to look so damn...damn..._weird_ (oddly even _more_ attractive), what with the way his lashes became hooded as if aware of some secret Naruto wasn't privy to, or the way his lips had parted ever so slightly...sort of like the way a girl would act when she wanted to be...

(kissed...ravished...owned)

_Argh!_ _No fucking way!_ he wailed in silence with a furious scratch of his head. _It was the pain making him act that way, that's all! I mean look at him this morning. He hasn't even spared me a glance, and as usual, he's pretending as if I don't even exist._

Thanks to the 'strange' visit, sleep had not come easy the rest of the night. He had lain awake; going over what had transpired as well as rehashing that scene he had witnessed in the bathroom between Sasuke and his 'servant'. There was definitely no denying his assumptions now. Sasuke _did_ have a thing for the guys. How else could you explain the loving expression on his face and the way he was touching Haku's cheek? Hell, if they had come in a minute later, he might have caught those two doing something pretty damn _inappropriate_.

To compound matters, he and Haku showed up late to the meeting (they were all now in Itachi and Shisui's apartment), and both had taken up a corner of the room; sitting between Karin and Shikamaru. What was the cause of the delay? Had they been so busy finishing up what they had started last night? He ignored the friendly smile Haku flashed his way, with a barely perceptible nod, as something Sasuke said last night came rushing back to mind.

/Actually, I only did it because I didn't want to see Haku upset./

_Naturally._ Why upset your boyfriend or lover…or whatever the hell they called themselves?

He plucked absently at a piece of the tacky rug on the floor; watching their interaction with hooded lids. He told myself that those words hadn't bothered him at all, but then again, he would be a big fat liar if he didn't admit it either. He really had no idea why they would make him so pissed off, but they did. It was as if Sasuke was so damn willing to make Haku happy, and would only do things to please the guy at the expense of others.

_Hell! So if it wasn't for Haku, he wouldn't even speak to me? Well fuck it. I'm just going to have to tell Itachi that this whole babysitting job is gonna be a burst. I have no intention of helping a guy who's only trying to be 'civil' with me because his servant asked him to. Like I need his damn pity..._

"Everyone had breakfast?" Shisui interrupted as he towered over and surveyed the motley crew with arms akimbo. If he noticed the cold look Sasuke was giving him, he paid no attention to it, for there was a rare smile on his face, despite being dressed in a black yukata that was a rather poignant reminder of the uniforms worn by the watchdogs.

At their mumbled replies of 'yes' or nods, he gave a light grunt of satisfaction and plunked himself on the floor with legs crossed. Itachi, who was sitting beside him – and dressed in similar fashion - reached behind to drag a pretty large gray traveling bag toward him. It was lifted (with a grunt of exertion) and dumped before Shisui, who promptly unzipped it and began to talk in his usual no-nonsense tone.

"As most of you know, I went to do a little reconnaissance the other day...or better yet, spoke to a few people back home to see the state of affairs."

The occupants in the room were too busy gawking in disbelief at what the older man was removing from the bag. Several pistols (a Glock G26, a Glock G21, a Ruger Blackhawk, and a Smith and Wesson .357), a semi-automatic rifle, boxes of cartridges, bullets, empty magazines, throwing knives (Haku's eyes literally glowed at the sight of these), two very impressive-looking _wakizashi_ and matching _katanas_ to go with it. Naruto had no doubt that the guns, at least, were illegal around these parts. They weren't exactly the kinds that Kojima had used. All the same, he resisted the urge to wipe his sweaty palms upon his lap at the sight of the weapons; faintly aware of feeling a mild sense of relief at actually seeing the damn things.

(I need them for protection...that's all...that's all it is...really)

"Needless to say..." Shisui continued as he picked up the Glock and began to check it with a skilled eye. Sure and steady fingers took the weapon apart, and the others could only watch mesmerized as he began to load in a 10-round magazine with an expertise that was nearly jaw-dropping. "Things are not looking too good. A prisoner who managed to escape during the chaos gave me a few details. As far as he knows, Orochimaru has begun rebuilding the sections of Byaku-Shinkyou that were destroyed in the fire. You also know he set up the fake funeral to essentially finish off Sasuke, right?"

At their nods, he continued, this time now working on the Smith and Wesson. "Turns out he's getting quite impatient. Since Danzo's still stuck in the hospital, Orochimaru is making a move without him." This time he turned his attention to the flushed Naruto; a dark unreadable expression in his eyes. "Word is, he's got the entire Bakufu Syndicate doing his dirty work for him now. You do understand what this means, don't you, Naruto?"

Naruto clenched his hands tightly on his lap and nodded with a faint smile. "Yeah...Itachi filled me in the other day. I'm pretty much a bounty, right?"

"Just about," Shisui agreed with a faint smirk. "Who knew you could be such a threat to them after all."

"I know I took out Kojima who was his nephew or something," Naruto mumbled; feeling a dark heat flush over him at the realization that all attention was now focused on him. He decided to look at Itachi since he was the harbinger of the bad news in the first place. "And now they want to finish up what they started, right?"

"It's more than that," Shisui began, but at a shared look with Itachi, he shrugged and continued from where he left off. "Bottom line, Orochimaru has started to take out anything and anyone that could be remotely connected to us and he's hired the Bakufu to take care of business behind the scenes. All the more reason why Itachi and I have to head back as quickly as possible. We need to remobilize members who might be considering fleeing or jumping ship."

"And Danzo doesn't know about this, you said?" Sasuke asked tightly. His features looked strained, but there was no mistaking that he was pissed off.

"I don't think so," Shisui replied with a purse of his lips. "You should Orochimaru's tactics by now. If he has the opportunity to grab the bull by the horns, he'll do it, even if it means betraying his best friend."

By this time, he had loaded all the guns with new magazines before laying out the weapons neatly before him. "Either way...you need to protect yourselves, which is why I have these available. Pick your poison, but be careful. My hope is you never have to use them, but it never hurts to be prepared just in case."

For a minute, no one seemed to move a muscle, but finally Sasuke reached out to pick a _katana_ and _wakizashi_, which didn't seem to surprise anyone in the slightest. Though the katana wasn't as magnificent as Riku-sama's, it was still an impressive sword as he slowly unsheathed it to admire the glint it gave off when the sunlight hit its sharpened steel blade. He could almost taste the blood of Orochimaru (and maybe Danzo) dripping off its tip. How he would delight in driving it right through their hearts.

Karin chose the Smith and Wesson, and with the way she double-checked its chamber, there was no doubt she was quite familiar with the weapon's workings. Haku chose the set of throwing knives with a bow of gratitude at Shisui, while Shikamaru picked the second _katana_ and matching _wakizashi_.

"Well...pick one, Naruto," Itachi cajoled quietly when it seemed as if the blond was still in a trance-like state as he stared at the guns left. "Or are you not comfortable with those weapons?"

"...not really..." Naruto confessed in a small voice. He could hear the deafening (yet muted) echo of the gun going off in his hand; could still feel the arm numbing recoil as he fired and the subsequent smell of hot lead and metallic blood as dark as night.

/Sometimes you've gotta do the unthinkable just to survive, Naruto. /

The haunting voice seemed like a combination of Kojima and Asuma speaking to him, and still stuck in that seemingly trance-like state, Naruto finally leaned forward to choose the Glock 26. Unaware of the expression on his face; a vacant, somewhat cold detachment that was chilling to see, he checked the chamber (recalling Kojima's 'lessons') and saw that Shisui had loaded a 19-round magazine within. He clicked it back in place and tested its weight on his palm. Light…hardly cumbersome…easy to hide within his pants if he went around town. Not too bad…

"Perfect," Shisui stated with a smile that seemed to know so much. "And now…"

The rest of the meeting was spent explaining how they were to lay low in the apartment for at least two more weeks before doing any major exploration of the city. Sasuke and Naruto were reminded of their task to create blueprints of Byaku-Shinkyou for the next major plan was to stage another attack, though they were sure Orochimaru would have taken extra precautions to protect his fortress. More money was given to them, and Sasuke was tempted to ask how and where they were getting all this cash from. However, recalling that his brother was technically connected to the Chinese triad, it would have been a foolish question. Special telephone numbers and codes were given to each of them in case of an emergency, and each was to keep the other informed of where they were going at all times. If they made friends, they were never to step foot into their apartments, no matter how nice they were. They were not to court the attention of the authorities if they could help it, and if for some reason they were caught, they would feign ignorance claiming they were Koreans who had lived in Japan for most of their lives, and had just returned 'home' for a vacation. Jae Weong Seo would back up their story.

"Shisui and I will be leaving tomorrow night," Itachi said. "Remember…when we do get to Japan, do not call us directly. There might be a likelihood of phone calls being traced. Use the special intermediary I spoke about. Karin is familiar with him and he can be trusted. We will be in touch with you more often than not, and if there is any movement towards Korea…we'll let you know so you can be on your toes." He looked into each strained face before him with a dull sense of sadness; only intensified as he noted his brother's pinched expression.

_This is no kind of life to live. Not for you…or me…or anyone…_

"I know this is going to be difficult," he began in a soft tone of reassurance, "but this is the time for you to get stronger in our absence. Keep your appointments with Dr. Woo and perform your physical therapy exercises diligently. Train with your weapons of choice as often as you can. If you need more bullets or your blades sharpened, Jae will be of assistance. You two…" He looked pointedly at Sasuke and Naruto. "You both hold your fates in your hands. From now on…every second you spend training your body back into shape, should be focused on why you are pushing yourself so hard. You are each fighting for one thing…freedom…which comes at a sometimes painful price. Our roles are to be your support system. We will always be here should you need us." He gave them a small but warm smile. "So…any questions?"

Sasuke opened his mouth to say he did have something to say, but when everyone else shook their heads and began to rise to their feet, he felt the opportunity had passed. However, he was surprised to notice Itachi motioning for him to remain seated.

"I need to talk to you for a minute, Sasuke," he said as the others filed out.

"And I need to talk to you, Naruto," Shisui announced as he pulled out a dossier from the traveling bag and threw an arm around the bemused blond's shoulders. "Come walk with me, eh?"

With the gentle close of the door behind them, Itachi and Sasuke were finally left to their devices...though the first minute was spent in an awkward silence before Sasuke lowered his gaze to eye his new swords all over again. Well...this was the moment he had been waiting for, wasn't it? To be alone with his brother and to question him about Shisui. And yet as the seconds dragged on, Sasuke knew that whatever he was going to say, or how he was going to begin that particular conversation, was going to sound nothing more than foolish and somewhat unnecessary in the grand scheme of things.

Throughout the meeting, he had watched their interaction like a rabid hawk, but if they were _really_ a 'couple', they did not go out of their way to make it obvious. Hell, if he hadn't caught them together in bed, he would **never** have known they were that intimate. However, though it wasn't blatant, there were still things they did, which _now_ made sense to Sasuke. It was their ability to communicate so much with only their eyes; how a simple nod or a quick glance would let the other know what the other was thinking. It was the subtle touches here and there; a gentle caress of hands or a light squeeze on the shoulder. It was a sign of their closeness over the years; countless seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks spent in each other's company. Still...was that really an excuse to gravitate towards each other sexually? Sasuke was sure Itachi could have had his pick of any one else (of the female persuasion) because the brother he had known did have girls fawning all over him when they were children. So why Shisui? What kind of evil incantation had the other man chanted to convince Itachi that being in a relationship with him was the right way to go?

"I think I owe you an explanation," Itachi finally said softly. He had been busy packing away the rest of the weapons not picked and with a foot pushed aside the bag before crossing his legs again to focus his attention on his brooding brother. "You must have seen Shisui and I..._together_...correct?"

"You're always _together_," Sasuke replied as flippantly as he could; feigning ignorance. He caressed the scabbard with slightly trembling fingers.

"You know what I mean, Sasuke."

A shrug. "I'm not sure I know what you're talking about. Please clarify."

Itachi sighed heavily and ran a hand down his face. _Tread carefully,_ he told himself as he watched his brother's expression. Sasuke was pretending not to care, but there was an obvious tension around his shoulders that revealed all wasn't as it seemed to be.

"Do you mind me asking you a question first?"

"Go ahead."

"What is your definition of love?"

It would have been amusing to see how red-faced the younger Uchiha became at this blunt question, but Itachi was too concerned with the mild look of panic and confusion that had filled those dark eyes before they were quickly replaced with irritation.

"What kind of a question is that?"

"It's a simple question really," Itachi replied with a wan smile. "You believe mother and father loved us, right?"

"Yes, they did."

"And what kind of emotions did that bring out in you? How did knowing mother and father loved you, make you feel?"

_Warm...protected...happy..._

"You felt warm, protected and happy...at peace, didn't you?" Itachi revealed out loud, causing Sasuke to glance at him sharply. It really was uncanny how Itachi seemed to know how and what he was going to say before he even said them. As a child he had marveled at that ability, now it just pissed him off...a little.

"And how did you feel about me?" came the soft, almost tentative question.

"You?" Sasuke repeated with a blink.

"Did you love me as well, Sasuke?"

He felt his cheeks burn with heat and he lowered his lashes to hide what Itachi was likely to see in his eyes. Of course he had loved his brother. Itachi had meant the fucking world to him! If Itachi had told him to jump into a lake of fire, he would have probably done so with no questions asked.

"You know I did," Sasuke finally mumbled in embarrassment. He tugged at his ear gently – a childhood, nervous gesture he had the tendency to do when caught in a tight situation. He had no idea why Itachi was interrogating him like this, and really didn't see how this was in any way related to his decision to become Shisui's lover.

"Thank you," came the two whispered words, of such genuine gratitude, that it brought a hard lump to Sasuke's throat. "I love you just as much if not even more, Sasuke."

_Love...not loved. He still loves me...after all this time..._

The lump was turning into a familiar burning sting that was beginning to form at the back of his eyes. Sasuke squeezed them shut to control himself. He hadn't come here to begin bawling like a baby. He really wished Itachi would move away from this topic and get to the crux of the matter.

"So..." Itachi cleared his throat which had come out thick and strained as if too holding back his tears, and tried again. "So what does this have to do with Shisui? I want you to imagine all those emotions you've just remembered, Sasuke. Those feelings of warmth, protection...peace...and happiness. I want you to hold on to those emotions and toss in a little bit of devotion and loyalty...like the way Haku loves you in his own way."

_Like Haku's devotion..._

"When you've got all that together," Itachi continued. "Add a little something extra..."

Sasuke looked up with a raised brow. "Something...extra...?"

Itachi gave a small smile. "Yes...that something extra...an intangible that is a culmination of passion and desire...almost like a craving for something dangerous and intense...something that brings out the fire within you, and I don't mean the kind of fire that makes you want to kill something, but more like a flame that always ignites once this person walks into a room. Can you picture that?"

_An intangible feeling...a passion that ignites me once a person walks into a room..._

(spiky blond hair, blue eyes that could darken with anger or mischief, those soft lips that I would love to bite...)

_Oh God. _Sasuke groaned and buried his heated face within his hands. _I don't fucking believe this._

"Sasuke?"

"What?" came the frustrated cry of intense inner turmoil.

"I realize I'm perhaps triggering the other side of all this...what you must have probably gone through with Orochimaru."

"How do you know what I went through with him?" Sasuke asked with a sneer as he lowered his hands. At the mention of that bastard's name, the so-called-ignited-passion had faded into that familiar boil of disgust and loathing.

"Asuma did mention some of the wild parties Orochimaru used to have...and I'm afraid it gave you a distorted view of what being in a real loving relationship is like."

"Is that all he told you?" Sasuke asked in a voice that was barely a whisper.

"That was all he knew..." Itachi paused and clenched his hands tightly. "Did he...he didn't...?"

Their eyes met and Itachi saw the answer he was dreading within the haunted gaze before him. He felt his heart sink with sorrow, and yet felt the flickers of anger at Orochimaru's audacity to violate his brother in ways he could never imagine.

"That son-of-a-bitch!" he hissed with a pound of his clenched fist onto the floor. "That sick...!"

"At least I was lucky he didn't get too far with me," Sasuke admitted; feeling a surge of gratitude at Itachi's anger on his behalf. "He did try many times, but I never gave him the opportunity to take advantage of me...until that night we were in Kyoto."

And though he had sworn never to tell anyone his shameful experience with Orochimaru, Sasuke found himself spilling his guts to his older brother. The more he spoke, the more it felt like a huge weight was being lifted off him, even speaking about the mauling now seemed as if it had happened to someone else.

"But what happened later that night...seemed to supersede his actions," Sasuke continued softly. He leaned back against the wall and closed his eyes; this time painting the picture of his encounter with the beautiful blond female who had initiated him into manhood. "It was the first time I realized that being touched wasn't always a bad thing," he confessed with a dark blush staining his cheeks. "Being...that intimate with someone else who genuinely cared about you could result in an experience that is almost spiritual. I wanted to feel that again...but Orochimaru stole that pleasure from me as well."

His hands formed tight fists at his sides as the memories came rushing back with a vengeance.

"Who knows? Maybe Ino and I could have been...you know..." His words trailed off, but Itachi understood all the same with the light nod he gave.

"I'm sure she awaits you in the next life...though I must confess that I was extremely proud of you for finally breaking free of those chains to get your first experience. Asuma was just about drinking himself into a stupor in celebration."

Sasuke had the grace to turn a bright beet red at this. "That idiot," he grumbled and scratched his nose in embarrassment. "Either way...you still haven't told me why Shisui."

"You want the honest answer?"

"I think that would be very beneficial, don't you?"

Itachi smiled and rubbed his chin in thought. "Well...remember all that stuff I listed earlier with the warmth, peace, passion etc. etc.?"

Sasuke remained silent; though his gaze was now watchful.

"I feel that way for Shisui, and perhaps I always have."

Sasuke shook his head. "I'm sorry...are you trying to tell me that even when you were children, you had those kinds of feelings for him? That's just..._sick_!"

"No, no, no. I can assure you I had no intentions of sleeping with Shisui as a child. What do you take me for?" He reached out to playfully tease his younger brother's locks; though Sasuke tried to dodge from getting his hair ruffled. Didn't Itachi know just how long it took him to get it down just right? "I did have an intense devotion to him when we were children. I would have done anything for Shisui back then...still will."

"You're insane," came the low mutter.

"I know...love does make you insane sometimes."

"I still don't get it...why did it have to be him?"

"Love is no respecter of persons, Sasuke. It doesn't go about selecting someone so obvious." He gave a small, but beautiful smile. "Sometimes it pops up when you least expect...with someone you least expect."

"Please don't tell me I'm going to fall in love with Haku..."

"But you're already half-way in love with him, aren't you?"

"I do not feel any passion igniting when he's the room, goddamnit!"

"Ah..."

"Ah?" Sasuke raised a brow.

"So is there anyone who does that for you...now?"

"...no..."

"...I see."

"What do you see exactly?"

"Nothing. I just...see."

"You see too much," came the low grumble of irritation.

"It's just..."

"What?" Sasuke snapped; feeling his heart beat begin to quicken. He swears if Itachi dares mention that name...

"...might be just my imagination."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Why are you blushing? I haven't even said anything yet."

"I am _not_ blushing!"

"Is it too hot in here then? Maybe I should turn down the thermostat -"

He pounded his crutch, on the floor, in annoyance. "Itachi!"

"Yes?" The older blinked innocently, while biting his inner cheek to control the laughter that would have burst out. Sometimes, his younger brother was just too easy to read.

"I know what you're thinking, and I can reassure you that is not the case."

"So why were you at his apartment last night?"

Sasuke choked on his saliva and had to pound his chest to get some air into his lungs again. Talk about being blindsided with that out-of-the-blue query.

"I...I just went to thank him, that's all," came the stutter. "He helped me in the bathroom when I was about to fall and I forgot to thank him then."

"Ah..."

"It's the truth!"

"I didn't say you were lying, did I?"

"Wait...wait..." Sasuke held out a hand as if to wad off his brother, while rubbing his forehead as if to get rid of a headache. "This conversation is going way off its original intent." He took a deep breath and tried again. "So...basically...how long have you and Shisui been...doing this?"

"Hmm...we started a year after we were reunited..."

"Good grief..."

"...and haven't stopped since."

"God help me."

"Shisui can be quite a demanding partner..."

"No kidding..."

"...but he is fiercely loyal to me and would take a bullet for me if it came to that. The feeling is quite mutual, Sasuke."

The joviality was gone and as Sasuke lowered his hand to really look at his older brother, he could tell that this meant a lot to him.

"I am not asking you to accept us or embrace our relationship that easily," Itachi continued in that quiet yet firm tone. "I just wanted you to understand _why_ I chose him to be my life partner. Love comes in many shapes and forms, and you've been fortunate, or unfortunate, to experience both extremes so far. I do not expect you to shake off years of Orochimaru's brainwashing, but I do want you to try to latch onto those other good and wonderful feelings you experienced with Ino; draw strength from the love you felt for mother, father and myself, languish in the devotion and loyalty Haku showers upon you on a daily basis, and hopefully...someday...you eventually accept or find that passion to ignite you. It's still an ember at the moment and when the flames finally roar deep within, I pray that it will be with the one person you simply can't be without. Male or female."

He leaned forward, and before he could be stopped, placed a warm and tender kiss on Sasuke's feverish forehead.

"Stop it. I'm not a baby anymore," came the low, embarrassed response from the younger as he swiped at his forehead, though he was still flushed (and somewhat giddy) with Itachi's heartfelt words and how hard they had hit him.

_Find my own ignition, huh?_

(you don't have to look very far, do you?)

"Still..."

"Hmm?"

"I need to find a temple to be purified. Seems like it's been ages since I did that."

"I'm sure we can find a temple for you to bathe in..."

"Not bathe in it! Purify, you jerk...!"

They both turned as the door opened and Shisui leaned against the door jamb, arms folded across his chest with a small knowing smirk on his handsome visage.

"So...am I officially a part of the family now?" he asked with a nod at Sasuke; an obvious sign that he had either eavesdropped or Itachi had forewarned him about this conversation.

Sasuke eyed the other man warily...glanced at his brother who gave him a sheepish smile...before shaking his head with an inner sigh of weary resignation.

If his brother was happy this way then...

"Fuck you," he finally replied with a lifting of his middle finger in salutation.

Shisui grinned and bowed. "I will take that as a resounding 'yes'. I look forward to sharing a cup of sake with you, Sasuke."

Itachi chuckled and rose to his feet. "And where's Naruto?"

The grin wavered and even Sasuke noticed the sudden change in body language. With his heart rate now picking up its pace again, he clutched his _katana_ tightly as Shisui's low response resonated deep within him.

"He needs some time alone...as you might imagine...not exactly the kind of story a guy wants to hear about his family..."

Itachi nodded solemnly and took a deep breath; a pensive expression on his visage. Sometimes the truth could be harsh, but Naruto at least deserved to know just how he had come to be and why the eternal thread of revenge would continue to unravel with him until his dying day.

The second phase of his life had only just begun.


	21. 21: A Father's Influence

**Notes:** Wow! I am as thriiiiiiillled as a guy on LSD at all the wonderful feedback from you lovely folks! *does the Snoopy Dance* So to bridmatt (thanks for showing me the nuances of cliché fandom storylines! I shall continue to do my best to surprise your expectations), Adevlo.D (Shika fans unite!), Opalynne (who is always first to leave a comment!), little toshiro (hope your finger is better!), roro237, Ikarinogo, Morana_Whiskey (your comment still makes me chuckle), Through_Darkness_and_Light, SilverSauce (who I plan to put over my knee and spank one of these days for being so cheeky...no pun intended *lol*), and to Violetwylde (your feedback had me stupefied! *bows gratefully* I really am surprised when folks give me such high praise considering I am my own worst critic. So here's to hoping I don't let you all down and this story ends with a bang!...so to speak. Thank you again and again and again!)

P.S: I addressed this to SilverSauce, but I wanted to know and hear from others if you are having problems with the updates. I ask because the last chapter was posted on a Wednesday (I believe), and I only heard from Opalynne that same day because she said she had it on alert. However, I got no feedback until Saturday I think, when ALL the reviews started pouring in at once. Which leaves me wondering if the site has a delay or something of the sort? Or did you all just decide to read on a Saturday? *lol* So as of this posting, today is Monday. Let's see when the comments start coming in by Friday -_- Dang site issues!

Ah, here I go rattling off. Anyhoo, please enjoy the new chapter and as always, I eagerly anticipate your comments! Thank you and enjoy! *bows gratefully*

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><p><strong>Chapter 21: <strong>

**A Father's Influence**

_Soon I shall cease to be_

_When I am beyond this world,_

_Can I have a memory_

_Of just one more meeting?_

_Izumi Shikibu_

* * *

><p><em>Naruto: <em>

"I know you didn't ask, but I could sense you were curious anyway. Consider it a gift from Itachi and me."

Before I could open my mouth to ask what the hell he was talking about, Shisui slapped a dossier against my chest; that strange smile still on his face. We were the only ones in the hallway now, as Karin had 'kidnapped' Haku for God knows what, to her apartment, while Shika had already gone ahead without me. Gingerly, I held the beige folder between my hands, noting that there was really nothing written on it to tell what it contained. In addition, it felt relatively light – not much to read – and yet there was a 'weight' that fell upon me as I slowly put two and two together. The dossier could only contain one thing; a solidification of what Itachi had revealed to me at the clinic.

"When Asuma told us about you, we were a little curious; me especially because of your features," Shisui continued quietly. "It wasn't so much the scars, but the life you had lived up 'til now. So I did a little digging and that is the result." He nodded at the folder.

"As you already know, I wasn't around when your father was still active, but I did manage to find a former member of the Syndicate who was willing to talk. It's pretty damn hard getting those guys to reveal their secrets, but Jiraiya-sensei was willing to share...after all he mentored your father for many years before officially retiring. Besides, he considers it poetic justice that you learn the truth now that he knows you exist."

The smile on Shisui's face withered a little. "Bottom line, everything you read there was written by Jiraiya-sensei himself. Whatever decision you come to at the end of it all...I hope it's the right one."

He squeezed my shoulder gently and made as if to leave when I stopped him; more to perhaps keep him around and stall the inevitable. For though I had claimed curiosity in wanting to know about my family, a part of me still felt I ought to let sleeping dogs lie, to return this folder back to Shisui and pretend as if this conversation had never happened to begin with.

/Remember your promise to make peace with the past.../

Yes, but then again...just how much peace could come from knowing that your father was a member of the most feared yakuza group in the world?

"Where is this Jiraiya-sensei?" I asked.

"Who knows?" came the enigmatic reply. "He's even worse than you are when it comes to traveling. It was a lucky break, on my part, to finally catch him when he was in Osaka. For all I know, he could very well be in Russia at this moment." He shrugged and waved a hand as if in dismissal. "Besides, you're better off not knowing for now. If he wants to see you, he'll definitely find you. No doubt about that."

"Ah..."

But Shisui was already gone before I could stutter out a suitable reply; leaving me standing like a moron in the empty hallway with my fate within my hands.

"All right, Naruto," I whispered to myself while taking a deep breath to calm my suddenly pounding heart. "Let's get this show on the road already."

I knew I wouldn't be able to read it in the apartment with Shikamaru around, so I made a beeline for the narrow blink-and-you-just-might-miss-it door that stood between the janitor's closet and the bathroom. Shika and I had discovered it the other day while exploring our 'boring' floor, but it was no secret passage way to treasures untold (as much as we wished it was). Opening the door simply led you into a cramped, stuffy space with enough room for a flight of six graffiti-infested steps, which led to another door that took you to the rooftop of the apartment complex. About the size of a soccer field, it was a dizzying maze of water tanks, heating and cooling systems (which shot up faint clouds of smoke every now and then) as well as low, narrow slabs of concrete to demarcate one section from the other. Someone had tried to create an aviary - or something of the sort - at the far end of the roof, but there was now nothing left but a ramshackle of a large bird house, discarded feeding pans, many bird droppings, and the lingering stench of said droppings. Steel poles, which must have once been used for clothes lines, stood naked and swayed ever so slightly with a gust of the wind. Every now and then, a crow or two would land upon it to peck at some unseen snack before hopping around aimlessly.

I leaped over several slabs in an effort to get to the opposite end of the maze, where I could at least get a little shade from the largest water tank. It was a beautiful mid-morning all things considered; not too cold and not too hot, with a breeze that brought along with it a soothing caress on my heated skin, as well as mingled smells of the river, garbage, laundry, and decent cooked meals. From my vantage point, I had a good view of the other apartment rooftops, some of which had clothes lines set up with washed sheets and clothing flapping in the wind. I also had a good view of some of our neighbors' balconies, where there was a man shaving, and another with a mother cradling her wailing baby, and another with an old lady trying to sweep it clean; just regular folks doing everyday things. Nothing really extraordinary.

Next to the complex, the out-of-place winding river glistened as it continued to flow ever so silently, where a few children could be seen running alongside or daring to wade into it. Across from that, the construction site (for probably another apartment complex) was in full swing with its bulldozers and trucks looking like toys from this distance. There was a baseball game being played on the field not far from that location, and seeing that brought a hard lump to my throat. There was something rather depressing in knowing that there were folks out there who could live their lives with no worries, while we were confined in this place until God knows when.

_(at least it's a million times better than sitting in some underground dungeon counting the minutes until you die)_

The faint cheers that arose from a winning home run had me shaking my head and forcing myself to concentrate on what was before me. This was no time to sit around moping and feeling sorry for myself. I took a deep breath and opened the folder, where I was immediately accosted with a smiling visage of a handsome young man who could have been about my age or maybe two years older. Even if his name hadn't been typed and pasted across the bottom of the picture, anyone could tell that this guy must have been related to me in some way.

_Mi-na-to Na-mi-ka-ze..._

_(my father)_

The lump I had thought gone returned with a vengeance as a trembling finger reached out to caress the photograph. It was clearly an old one, but still good enough to reveal a face that was friendly and open; hardly the features of a hardened killer as my imaginations had so wildly perceived. His hair was like mine; spiky and blond, and though he had no scars on his cheeks, we had both inherited the same eye color...and smile ('all teeth' I used to be told by Sakura). He looked like a freakin' happy-go-lucky guy! Relaxed and not at all fazed or worried about who was taking the photograph. It almost made you want to crack a smile as well...except my heart was still doing the tango even as I noticed there were a few more photographs attached behind the initial headshot. Here was one with Minato posing beside a pretty damn cool motorbike, looking like a kid who had just won the lottery. Here was another of him reading a magazine with a toothpick stuck in the corner of his mouth – must have been a candid shot since he wasn't paying much attention to the camera. Here was another of him eating from a giant bowl of ramen (my favorite food too!) while grinning at the camera. I don't know about you, but seeing these pictures made me feel even more depressed. These snapshots told of a guy who might have been a killer, but at least he did know how to have a normal life outside of his chosen profession. He looked cool...kind...just freakin' _awesome_...and the realization that such a person had not been a part of my life...

_Sniff._

We could have had the best time if he was still alive, you know?

Angrily, I scrubbed away the drops of tears that had fallen upon the photographs, squeezed my eyes shut and threw my head back to control myself. Geez. If the waterworks were already beginning, how would I manage when I was done reading this Jiraiya-sensei's account of my father's life? When I was sure the tears had stopped, I lifted my lashes and focused on the documents again; time to get to reading.

_Ah...wait a minute..._

There was one more photograph; a much smaller one of passport size actually. This was another old image; one of a beautiful young woman with extraordinary long hair as red as Karin's and piercing green eyes that reminded me of Sakura. She wasn't smiling...well it was more of a small smile, and she was dressed in a high-school uniform.

Again, even without being told, I knew this was my mother, because I could see my face in hers. And though my memories of her were nothing more than faded, fuzzy images, there were a few things that crept into my consciousness every now and then; that hair for one thing. I guess it was because it was so damn long; I must have used it as a blanket when I was a baby.

I turned the photograph over and written behind it were the barely legible words:

_Sorry, this was the only photo of Kushina I could find. Rest assured; she was much older when she met your father. ;)_

Hah. At least it's good to know Dad didn't go looking for jailbait. Not that I would have blamed him if he was attracted to the Kushina in the photo. She was a looker indeed. No way could you resist a babe like her if she came walking your way.

I set the photographs aside to focus on the neatly typed (thank God for that! not sure I could have read anything illegible) words with its rather personal opening statement.

_Hmm._

To Uzumaki Naruto,

If this finds you well, and I hope it does for I trust Shisui will deliver it safely to you, I hope that you read this with an open heart and the knowledge that your father was indeed a good man and one you can be proud of. We all make decisions in our lives – whether good or bad – and though your father was not always in the right, he did his utmost to make the best of whatever situation was presented to him. I believe this is a mentality you must have inherited as Shisui has told me a little about the life you must have led so far. To be honest, I was quite surprised when he told me about you; for I had no idea Minato had a son. He must have wanted to protect you at all costs for good reason. I did know he had found true love with your mother, Kushina, but that was the last time I was in direct contact with him. However, I digress and I beg your forgiveness for rushing into things. Perhaps I should start from the beginning...from the moment I became aware of who your father was and just why he made quite a few formidable enemies in his lifetime.

As Shisui must have told you, I am no longer a member of the Syndicate. I am now too old and prefer to spend my days writing while traveling and exploring God's beautiful earth. However, many moons ago, I was a _shateigashira_ of one of the many gangs beneath the Bakufu Syndicate umbrella. Our headquarters was in Aichi, where I governed over a thousand members and an extremely lucrative 'business'. Our turf was untouchable, and every now and then high-school kids with no money or little prospects came seeking for an opportunity to become a member of the organization while doing the most outrageous or stupid things to get attention. It wasn't as if your father went out of his way to gain permission into the group. It was actually quite interesting when I look back now, for it was a clear sign that Minato was just no ordinary high school kid after all...

* * *

><p><em>Thirty Moons Ago:<em>

He heard the commotion long before about five of his men, dragged in the bloody but defiant young man into his office. Though sporting a swollen jaw and his left eye almost shut, the kid couldn't have been older than fifteen. With his wild shaggy blond hair and piercing blue eyes, he glared daggers at Jiraiya as if he was the one responsible for his current condition. He was dressed in a pair of jeans and a tee-shirt. However, it was the blood-stained white apron with 'DOKI'S BAKERY' written on it, as well as the half-chewed off loaf of bread tucked beneath his arm, that seemed to tell the whole story. The kid was clinging to the bread as if it was a lifeline, and though it was also stained with blood (as if it had been dipped it in actually), he wouldn't let it go.

"Here's the brat, _oyabun_!" Mitsuki panted as he all but kicked the kid on his ass to send him sprawling onto the fine Persian rug Jiraiya had just installed last week. Mitsuki's pristine white suit was just as messy; with bloodstains that made it look as if he had been involved in a gunfight. "Son of a bitch almost killed Urashi!"

"With his loaf of bread?" Jiraiya drawled in amusement. The kid was still glaring at him, but was slowly rising to his knees (heh, perhaps finally realizing he was in the presence of someone great), but no...he was actually _standing_ up again! Jiraiya had to give him kudos for being so brazen.

As for Mitsuki – who was a monster of a man – he turned red in the face at the assumption, which wouldn't have been far from the truth.

"We were only doing our patrol," he began explaining. "And we went to get our payment from Saitou-san, when this...this...bastard came charging at us with his damn bread!"

That would have been the understatement of the century. So yes, they had begun haranguing the old geezer in the kitchen, even though he was on his hands and knees begging them to give him one more week to get enough funds to pay his debt. Urashi, a relatively new member and still flexing his yakuza muscles, had placed a foot on the old man's head; sneering and calling him names in an attempt to crush his spirit. No one had really taken notice of the skinny blond kid who was helping to stack loaves of bread in the oven, but just as Urashi kicked the geezer in the jaw (and his fat wife had begun screaming like a banshee), the kid went psycho on them.

_Just like that._

First came the tray of sizzling hot buns to fall on their faces and bodies, and then 'BAM!' a fist came hurling next, which sent Kazu (another junior member) flying across the kitchen and landing almost head first into the oven. Urashi would barely have the time to gather himself before the kid threw an uppercut that shifted his jaw and caused a fine mist of sprayed blood to erupt from the crushed appendage. Urashi's howl galvanized Mitsuki into action, and he did manage to grasp the kid by the elbows and deliver a blow to his stomach. His victory was short-lived, however, as the kid sprang up like a fucking jack-in-the-box and with a damn loaf of stinkin' bread in his hand, used it to smash into Mitsuki's forehead with such force, Mitsuki was sure he blacked out for a second. He was like a fucking maniac! And it had to take all five of them – with Urashi barely able to move a muscle – until they had him subdued enough.

Jiraiya listened to the embellished tale and gave an inner sigh. This was not the first time he had to listen or deal with his members getting into skirmishes like this. However, he took pride in running a district where the civilians treated them with respect. If his gang continued to abuse their power like this, what stopped a revolt starting up or other rival groups seeking to control their turf? Mitsuki was a ticking time bomb and Jiraiya was getting sick and tired of having to put up with their behavior.

"Mitsuki," he began quietly with a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. "When was the last time you offered a finger to me?"

The subordinate blanched and immediately fell to his knees to bow in surrender; a motion that was immediately copied by his comrades. "Please forgive us, _oyabun_! We promise it will not happen again!"

"Promises, promises," Jiraiya replied tightly. "You are skating on thin ice. Next time...I won't even see your face, do you understand?"

Oh, Mitsuki _more_ than understood, for looking up meekly at the huge man behind the desk with that long shaggy white hair that looked like a lion's mane when angry, reminded the yakuza of who was _really_ in charge. Jiraiya was no doubt one of the most respected and feared members of the Bakufu organization, and people literally died just to be in his favor. Mitsuki knew he couldn't screw this up, and with a final heartfelt apology, he ushered his pathetic crew out of the office and shut the door behind him when it was clear his boss wanted to be left alone with the boy.

"What is your name?" Jiraiya asked absently. He had a shitload of paperwork to complete; mostly related to an incoming shipment of artillery from the Philippines.

There was stone cold silence for almost a full minute before the muttered 'Minato Namikaze' filtered into his ear.

"Hn." Jiraiya grunted and scribbled some more. He wasn't familiar with the family name, but then again, who said he had to know every damn person in the city?

"And how old are you?"

"I'll be fifteen in two months," came the surly reply. "Listen..."

Jiraiya looked up with a raised brow. _"Listen"?_ Had the boy really spoken to him as if he had other important matters to attend to? Under ordinary circumstances, Jiraiya might have left his seat to teach the brat a personal lesson, but there was still that something rather intriguing about the kid that had him actually dropping his pen, forming a tent with his fingers and focusing his attention on the bloodied face.

(still defiant as ever)

"Am I going to be punished or what?" Minato asked. "I was only trying to stop them from hurting Saitou-san. They had no right to kick him like that especially when he was begging them for mercy."

"You are right."

"Huh?" Minato's comical look of surprise at Jiraiya's frank agreement had him blinking his one good eye. It soon narrowed, however, and was filled with caution again.

"Mitsuki and his crew are not exactly known for being the most patient of people," Jiraiya explained with a small smile. "So you were right to defend your master. Not everyone can do that when the yakuza comes for a visit. It shows your bravery. I can appreciate that, Minato. So...what say I tell them and everyone else in my organization to stop harassing Saitou-san, hmm?"

Minato's good eye flashed with excitement. "Really? You'd do that?"

"Of course! I'm a generous guy after all." He burst out into good natured laughter that brought a tentative smile to the kid's face. He wasn't sure of what was up with this guy (he had heard terrible stories about the feared _oyabun_ of their district of course), but at this moment, he didn't seem all that scary at all.

"Thank you," Minato finally sputtered. "Really. I'm sure Saitou-san will pay up eventually. Business has been a bit slow lately, but with the Christmas season coming up, I'm sure he'll make enough to complete his debt."

"Hmm...I wonder..." The laughter had stopped and Jiraiya was now rubbing his chin gently. "Do you know just how much Saitou-san owes us?"

"...how...how much?" came the worried query.

And at the sum Jiraiya mentioned, the kid all but groaned in misery. There was no way in hell that Saitou-san could pay up that much even if he worked non-stop for the rest of his life! How the hell had he...?

"An obsession to gambling," Jiraiya replied to the unspoken question. "Once he started, he couldn't stop. He mortgaged his home and sold his oldest daughter just to keep up with his addiction. Trust me, Minato, I have been more than lenient with him over the years, but I have lost a lot of money on that man and there will come a day when he'll have to pay the ultimate price."

"No..." Minato moaned in misery. Saitou-san – that good, kind-hearted but sometimes absent-minded old man – had taken pity on him and given him a job for such pitiful pay, and to know that this was his fate...it was just too cruel.

"That is life unfortunately," Jiraiya sympathized with a gentle nod. "However...there is a way we can end all of this with happy results all around."

Minato perked up again; eager to find a way to do anything to help his mentor for the past two years. "What? What can I do, sir?"

"You can come work for me."

"What?"

"You heard me," Jiraiya said with a smile. "I like you, Minato. You've got that little extra something that's rare in my men these days, and I'd like you to become a member of my organization."

Minato's eagerness had dissipated faster than a wild horse left on the streets. He scowled and straightened up. "No, thank you, sir. I'd rather not."

"Really?" Jiraiya toyed with the expensive looking crystal paperweight, in the shape of a toad, with his fingers. "Are you sure you should be so quick to refuse my request? If you worked for me, I can guarantee that Saitou will never be bothered for the rest of his life. His debts will be cleared and he can consider himself free."

"I..."

"How much does he pay you now?"

"Enough," Minato muttered.

"Enough, huh? Last I heard, you probably only get a few meals here and there, sleep in the attic above his home, and not much left for pocket money, is that correct?"

"I get by."

"And your education?"

"I study."

"You dropped out of school, didn't you?"

Minato turned a bright shade of red and scowled even harder at the rug. "I am saving up my money and I go to cram school -"

"I can provide you with a better home; an apartment all for yourself, more pocket money – weekly – than you know what to do with and even better, let you go to the best school in the district."

"And all I have to do is learn how to kill and harass people, right?" Minato asked with a sneer.

Jiraiya sighed and pretended to look hurt. "Is that really all you think about us? We do some good work for the civilians. We rescue failing businesses...at a price yes, but still! Without us, where would this nation be? We are the backbone of society, don't you forget it." He took a deep breath and tried again. "So...what do you say? I will personally mentor you and keep you away from all the scary guns and fights, if that's what you're so worried about."

Minato burned at the insinuation that he was a coward, but he did not lower his gaze from the intense dark eyes highlighted by twin trails of red paint on Jiraiya's cheeks. It was supposed to make him look intimidating and frightening, but perhaps Minato saw something else beneath the outward appearance; something in those eyes that told him that this man really was 'good' beneath the tough guy façade he put up.

"Well?" Jiraiya prodded with slight impatience. "I am a very busy man, Minato, and would like to get an answer as soon as possible."

"Can I at least think about it for a few days?" Minato asked. "You can't just expect me to change my whole life in the space of a few minutes."

"I didn't have that option," Jiraiya mumbled beneath his breath, but he shrugged. "Fine. Take a few days. However, you have only until the end of the week. If I do not hear from you by midnight, Friday, consider this conversation as never haven taken place and all you've ever known will be destroyed. Good day."

* * *

><p>Looking back now, I realize how cruel my offer must have been; knowing full well that it was my ultimatum that pushed him into the lifestyle. Many nights I have wondered if I did the right thing and how I could have done things differently, but no other solutions were forthcoming. Minato was sent to me for a reason and for a purpose. He was a child of destiny and he proved me right in that aspect as the years went by. Unlike my first impression of him, he was not a hothead at all, but a man who took the time to think things through before coming to a decision. It was something many of my subordinates lacked, and it didn't take long for him to become a respected member of our organization by the time he was only seventeen. He was loyal to a fault; never forgetting Saitou-san and always visiting him whenever he was in town. He worked hard at his studies and read everything in sight whenever he got a chance. However, it was his proficiency in combat that made him simply outstanding.<p>

You are already aware of his hand-to-hand combat fighting skills, and when it came to mastering the weapons, he was a natural. He was proficient with _kenjutsu_, but when it came to the gun, Minato was simply the best. I had always prided myself in being the fastest draw in the organization, but your father put me to shame at the practice range so many times, I finally had to relinquish my title. Not an easy thing to do, if you know me.

In those first five years with me, I did my best to keep Minato out of any 'dangerous' situations. He would only deal with the administrative side of things; helping to keep the peace while I was away on business or overseeing civilians who needed help with their affairs. Many in the community loved his fair-minded way of handling problems, and it even came to a point where they would deliberately seek him out instead of me. I didn't mind the shift in power. It was only more confirmation of my initial assumptions of his charisma and charm as a leader. In fact, looking back now, I realize I was indeed grooming him to become a leader. I just had no idea someone else had taken an even bigger interest in him until it was much too late.

* * *

><p>"What's that?" Jiraiya asked as he lowered the wash cloth from his eyes.<p>

"I said I was visited by the _kumicho's_ private secretary yesterday," Minato replied quietly.

They were sitting in a magnificent man-made _onsen_ within Jiraiya's lavish home, enjoying a much-needed soak after a long day of business meetings with some Taiwanese officials. The mist made it a little difficult to make out Minato's expression, but from the young man's tone, Jiraiya could tell that this was a topic that made him uncomfortable.

"What did he want?" Jiraiya finally asked; though he had an inkling of what it was about already. Minato's popularity within the organization was growing, and it wouldn't have been a surprise if the big dogs in Tokyo finally got wind of him. It was only natural they'd want to see the wonder kid for themselves.

(and if they're really interested...I might never see him again...)

"They want me to come to Tokyo. They'll provide all the necessary things I need, so I don't have to worry. Apparently, the _kumichō_ wants to have a meeting with me."

There was a long heavy silence before Jiraiya broke it with a boisterous cry. "What are you moping about for? Do you know how many _kyodai_ would kill to be in your position? You've only been here for five years and you're already going to get the opportunity to share sake with the big boss himself. You should be proud of yourself."

Minato slid Jiraiya a look that was a mixture of pain and confusion. "But...what if I don't want to join them? You swore I wouldn't get involved with the darker side of the organization, and I get the feeling when I get there...I might...I might..." He lowered his head and seemed to slide lower into the water. Jiraiya could barely make out the next words Minato muttered, but he was sure it sounded something like "never come back."

The older man felt his heart tighten with an emotion he thought he had lost with the death of his wife after the birth of their stillborn child. She had committed suicide; considering herself the cause of their child's demise. Jiraiya had been an emotional wreck for years, but he had kept it all hidden by burying himself with work and rising to the top of the Syndicate. Now, all so many years later, that once scrawny kid who had stood bloodied and defiant in his office was now going to be taken away from him. He should have known the fantasy wouldn't last forever. This was the harsh reality of being a _yakuza_ after all.

"Don't be silly," he said gruffly; realizing he'd have to be cruel if necessary so Minato wouldn't leave with a feeling of guilt. "This is an honor, Minato, so you should take it with pride. It would have been foolish to assume that your life would have been peaceful being a member of the Syndicate."

"But -"

"But nothing." Jiraiya pinned him with a look cold enough to freeze steam. "Tomorrow you will leave for Tokyo and do whatever the _kumichō_ requests of you. Ikegami-sama's rules are absolute. I have no more say in your fate from now on."

He couldn't bear to look at the agony on Minato's face, and the younger man's plaintive cry seemed to make his sorrow even worse.

"That's it? 'Go to Tokyo and do whatever they want?' Is that all you're going to tell me?"

"There is no need to raise -"

"Bullshit! I thought you...I considered you..." Minato's voice broke and the tears burst free before he could control them. He wasn't usually this emotional, but damn it! He had come to see Jiraiya as more than just his 'boss' over the years. This man had protected and cared for him, treated him with respect and showed him how good life could be despite the business they were in. To think that Jiraiya could discard him so easily...it _hurt_. It hurt a fucking lot.

"Get a hold of yourself!" Jiraiya snapped as he rose to his feet to tower over the other man. "Are you a _yakuza_ or just a sniffling cry baby? After all these years with me, this is how you're going to embarrass me in front of the _kumichō_?"

Like a douse of cold water, Minato felt as if he had been mentally slapped; his heart aching and yet gradually aware that this was actually happening. Jiraiya was actually letting him go this way; no attempt to make him stay and no reason to fight for him to remain under his wings. He really was nothing but a tool after all.

"Is that...is that all I mean to you?" Minato asked hoarsely as he lifted his tear-streaked but now impassive features to the man he had considered a mentor and father. "Is that it then?"

"This discussion is finished," Jiraiya stated icily. "Wipe your tears and walk out of here like a man. Remember who you really are now, Minato Namikaze. That is all."

With that, Jiraiya spun on his heels and left the onsen without looking back.

* * *

><p>For the first time in as long as I can remember, I shed tears that night in my office all alone. Minato would never know how much it pained me to say those words to him, and how much of a son he had become to me. I loved him, and I am not ashamed to admit that. Still, I did my best to keep up to date with all he did while under the wings of Ikegami Tsubasa; the most feared and respected leader of the Bakufu Syndicate even if he was getting old in years. I was told that almost immediately, Minato found favor with the <em>kumichō<em> despite him having a son – Ikegami Ryoichi - who was clearly next in line to being the Syndicate's leader.

You can already see where the strife begins.

I should also mention that by this time, a former military leader –Shimura Danzo – had become a major ally to the Syndicate. Perhaps 'ally' shouldn't be the word, but rather a sleazy, son-of-a-bitch, who used his power as a member of the DIET to gain favor with Tsubasa. With his connections to the police force – Byaku-Shinkyou – as well as its head Uchiha Fugaku, Danzo set new regulations that made the Bakufu considerable weaker than it was. It even got to a point where nothing could be done without Danzo's approval. I have attached a photograph of him so you see what he looked like then. The years must have changed him by now, but at least I felt you ought to see the face of the man who influenced your father in more ways than one.

I knew Danzo was ruthless, as I had met him quite a few times in the past, but little did I know just how far he would go to achieve his goals. I would never have known about his true intentions when it came to being in charge of not just the Syndicate but the police force as well, if it wasn't for your wonderful, dear father returning to see me when I least expected him to.

For almost four years, I had not heard or seen Minato in person. I was always under the assumption that he and I were no longer going to keep in touch and I had resigned myself to that since I felt I deserved his animosity. However, I was stunned to receive the phone call from him. For starters, he was the only one who had the numbers to my private line, and perhaps for sentimental reasons I had not bothered to change them since our farewells. So you can imagine my shock when at about three in the morning, it rings and I get to hear that voice I thought I'd never hear again call for me as if afraid of my wrath. If I could kiss that man through the phone, I would have, but I settled for agreeing to meet with him in an undisclosed location the next day.

* * *

><p>He had changed.<p>

In just four years, the happy-go-lucky kid had been replaced with a man who could only smile as if grimacing. Still - in that moment - as they stood looking at each other, Jiraiya could only see that scrawny blond kid with the sharp, blue eyes. He could only see that young man who had shared sake with him on many nights, traveled to so many places, and had been his confidante when he needed a listening ear.

(my son...welcome back)

He had not planned to do this, and goodness knew if any of his subordinates had seen him acting like so, they might have been surprised, but at this moment, Jiraiya couldn't care less what they thought. He spread out his arms, not really expecting Minato to accept so quickly, but he was wrong on that account as well. The younger man gave a harsh sob of gratitude and all but flung himself into Jiraiya's embrace; his arms strong and nearly crushing as they returned the hug he so desperately longed for.

Jiraiya couldn't stop his tears even if he wanted to. He placed tender kisses on the blond hair and brushed it gently as if trying to comfort Minato.

"I thought you'd never want to see me again," he confessed when their emotions were finally in check and they had made themselves comfortable on the narrow bench. "You are looking...well?"

Minato gave a shaky laugh and smiled weakly. "I don't. I have been battling the flu in the past few weeks, so I know I look a little out of it. However, I had to see you. It's been so long, hasn't it?"

"Indeed it has." Jiraiya reached out to trace the outline of Minato's face; feeling his heart break even more when his hand was clasped tightly and held to the heated cheek as Minato's lashes drifted closed.

"Please..." he begged wearily. "Let me hold it like this...for a minute more. These hands of mine...they've already been stained with so much blood. So much blood." His voice broke and he literally seemed to shiver.

"Tell me," Jiraiya cajoled with heaviness in his heart. "Tell me everything."

"Where do I even begin," Minato replied with another shaky laugh. All the same, he began to speak; of how his life had done a complete 180 the moment he stepped out of the car before the _kumicho's_ impressive abode. He hadn't met Tsubasa that first night, but was instead ushered to a wing of the compound where he was to reside.

"It was like living in a mini-palace," Minato confessed. "A mixture of traditional and modern amenities...it was so...overwhelming. I barely slept that first night. In fact, I'm not sure I slept at all."

By mid-morning, the next day, he was finally taken in to see the _kumichō_, and Minato had been struck at how the most powerful underground leader had appeared to him.

"He looked tired and frail, but there was still intelligence in those eyes that was impossible to ignore. I thought he would be more harsh and formal with me, but he was quite the opposite."

Tsubasa had invited Minato to share a cup of sake with him on that very first day – an unheard of situation when it came to a relatively new member to the _gumi_. Ryoichi – who was present at the time – had watched all this unfold with astonishment and intense envy.

"I did try to be friends with him," Minato said with a weak laugh. "But I knew it was going to be next to impossible. No matter what I did, he was determined not to like me at all."

Either way, Tsubasa had a long talk with Minato that night; a talk that resulted in Tsubasa wanting Minato to continue the role he had with Jiraiya. Minato would become a _saiko-komon_ who would work directly with Tsubasa and the first lieutenants; an adviser role which was one of the highest honors anyone could receive.

Jiraiya whistled in appreciation and pride. "Wow...that quick, huh?"

Minato nodded; a pensive expression on his visage. "Unfortunately, that had to be put on hold for a while."

"Why?"

"Do you know who Shimura Danzo is?" Minato asked with his hands clasping tightly as he all but spat out the name.

Jiraiya sighed. "Don't remind me. Who doesn't know that asshole?"

Minato nodded. "Danzo had other plans for me and it seemed he had a meeting with the _kumichō_ about my new role in the organization. He had learned of my skills with weapons and felt I would do much better working directly for him. I protested my involvement with this line of work to Ikegami-sama, but the old man was too easily influenced especially with Ryoichi and Danzo being in the room and insisting that I become Danzo's shadow. Tsubasa had no choice; hence I was just about sold off to that spawn of the devil."

"Hmm."

"I was forced to become anonymous; to change my identity and live in the shadows." As he said this, Minato turned to lift up the back of his jacket and shirt. On his lower back was a tattoo of a seal that was a cross between a yin and yang symbol and illegible script written around it. "He made me get this; a special tattoo to show what I had now become." Minato lowered his shirt and sat back with a heavy sigh.

"At first it was little jobs. Get rid of one or two people who were genuine threats to the organization. I was provided with the weapons for the job, dossiers of who these people were, where they frequented and where to assassinate them with the least possible attention. I confess that I was terrified on my first job; realizing I was going to have to take a life even though I knew it all came as part of being in the Syndicate. I can still remember it like it was yesterday." Minato held out his hands to stare at them as if seeing them for the first time. "To feel another man's blood on my hands thanks to slicing his neck as cleanly as possible...it was strange. I felt empowered and yet sickened at what I had done. I was ready to quit the next morning, but when a large envelope with more money than I ever thought possible landed on my doorstep as well as instructions on who my next target was, I realized I was now in too deep and couldn't escape even if I wanted to."

"This went on for months and months; the little fries eventually became important figure heads...politicians...businessmen...anyone who was bound to get in Danzo's way. By this time, I think I was beginning to lose my humanity. All I had to do was read the dossier filled with every damn sleazy thing those bastards had done, and I felt more than justified in killing them. A part of me felt I was doing the world a damn favor by getting rid of them. I looked forward to my assignments, and Danzo exploited my eagerness for all his worth. Hell, I would even travel as far as Hong Kong to get a job done, finish it in one night, and be back in my hotel room in Tokyo the next morning. I just didn't give a damn until..."

"Until?" Jiraiya prodded when Minato stalled.

"Until my latest mission," came the barely audible words that seemed to slip out through lips that were frozen. There was a haunted expression in the blond's eyes now, and Jiraiya had a feeling Minato was simply recalling the night of the incident.

"It started out as any ordinary mission; a dossier and envelope dropped at my doorstep which I picked up to begin reading. To say I was shocked when I saw the photograph in the folder would be putting it mildly."

"Who was it?"

Minato gave a bitter smile. "Uchiha Fugaku."

Jiraiya's jaw dropped. "Uchiha... Fugaku? The commissioner of police? Is Danzo crazy?"

"Heh...that was the same question I asked myself. I actually had to call the guy to make sure he wasn't kidding me, but no...Danzo wanted him dead and my job was to eliminate the guy; no matter what. According to the document, the best time to take him out was when he planned to visit Tokyo for a conference. My impression was that Fugaku would be alone on this trip, but I was dead wrong."

"How so?"

"He came with his family; his wife and son," Minato replied with a weak smile.

"Ah ..."

"Hm. Now, if there's any policy I have in this business, is that there would be no kids involved. Either that or I walk away. I was under the impression that Danzo understood that, but apparently not. So there I was on the rooftop right across their hotel room with the crosshairs of my sniper rifle aimed at the back of Fugaku's head. Perhaps I would have done the job and walked away within that second. However, everything changed when his son suddenly came running out to sit on his lap."

Minato moaned and covered his face. "I got such a bad case of the shakes, I almost passed out. I had this horrific image of me blowing that guy's brains out and having it splatter all over the kid. How the hell could I live with myself if that happened? I know I didn't exactly have the right to feel sorry for myself now or have thoughts of self-righteousness after all the people I've killed so far, but ...there...there was just something about seeing that happy family that stirred something inside of me. I couldn't do it. I just couldn't."

"So you walked away."

Minato nodded. "As you can well imagine, Danzo wasn't all too happy with my failed mission and made me pay for it. I'd show you the scars of my flogging, but I'll spare you the sight. All the same, I didn't care. Getting beaten was a small price to pay for sparing that family's life, and I felt that I could at least gain a little favor with God when I eventually got to gates of Heaven or Hell."

"Hmm..."

"But I'd be lying if that was the only reason," Minato confessed as a light blush dusted his cheeks. Jiraiya raised a brow.

"Well? Don't keep me in suspense," he prodded when it seemed like Minato would never speak.

"I met...well...I met this really cool girl," Minato finally mumbled and scratched the tip of his nose. "Her name is Kushina and...we've been going out in secret for a while. It was because of her...her influence on me...I was beginning to get a little...you know..._soft_, I guess."

"Oooh..." Jiraiya grinned and felt his heart burst with the pride of a father watching his son finally reveal he was no longer a virgin. "Do you have a picture of her?"

Minato gave his first genuine grin of the evening and reached into the pocket of his jacket to whip out the photograph of the girl who had stolen his heart. "Like I said, her name is Kushina," he said with a little more excitement in his voice. "We met about a year ago at a library, and we hit it off on the spot."

Jiraiya whistled. "She's beautiful."

"Isn't she?" Minato agreed with a smile that spoke volumes. Jiraiya was painfully reminded of how he had felt when he met the love of his life.

(ah...if you had only lived my precious Tsunade...)

"Does she know what you do?" Jiraiya asked aloud; forcing himself out of his morose reverie.

Minato sighed and shook his head. "Not really. I just told her I work in sales and she seems content with that, even though I'm sure she doesn't believe me. I've had to keep our dates a secret, but I fear now with Danzo's wrath, he might want to do something to her to teach me a lesson."

"But he doesn't know she's your girl, right?"

"I hope not," Minato muttered thoughtfully. "I just get the feeling that I'm being watched all the time now. Even meeting you today was a huge risk, but I had to get this off my chest...all of it."

Jiraiya nodded softly in understanding; though his heart was thudding fast as he realized just how dire Minato's position was. Danzo might be a crazy bastard, but his craziness was clearly the one that could sometimes see no reason. If he was determined to eliminate anyone in his path, he would stop at nothing to do so...not even if it was the very man he had trusted to become his assassin.

"...if push comes to shove," Minato was saying carefully. "I'm considering running away...leaving this country altogether with Kushina. We can start a new life together..."

"...you know as well as I do that it's not easy to leave the Syndicate, Minato," Jiraiya interrupted with a firm hand on Minato's trembling ones. "I know you love this woman, but you've got to think about your lives now if you decide to do anything rash."

"Not doing anything might end up killing her too," he hissed in desperation. "I...I have to protect her...I have to."

Jiraiya sighed and ran a hand down his face. "All right...all right, Minato...you do what you have to do, but remember that if you need me for anything..._anything at all_, I'll always be here."

Tears of gratitude sprang to those baby blue eyes again. He could barely choke out the words "thank you" before he was engulfed in another warm embrace that made him feel like he was finally home.

* * *

><p>I remember we talked for hours that day, but I had the feeling that Minato wasn't telling me the complete truth and now, I know why. The fool was concerned about me, and felt that if he revealed too much, Danzo would come after me as well. It was the last time I ever saw Minato in person. In fact, it was the last time I ever heard about him – even from my reliable sources. Minato seemed to have vanished without a trace, which only reminded me of his promise to protect Kushina and to run away from all he knew, just so he could start anew.<p>

It was frustrating to know that he did not trust me enough to seek my help. With my connections, I could have taken him to China or further still, until Danzo grew weary of seeking him. However, I was wrong and naïve in my thinking for that man was more determined than I gave him credit for. With the help of Ryoichi's henchmen – who for his own reasons wanted Minato dead to secure his position as next in line to becoming the kumichō – a nationwide manhunt began for your parents. This part I write because I only came to know of the news via Shisui's intensive research. I will do my best to recount it as I have been told.

Minato and a very pregnant Kushina fled from town to town in the space of a few months; never settling in one place for more than a few weeks at a time. Minato would have, of course, tried to sneak out of the country, but thanks to Danzo's connections; all the ports were on high alert and watchdogs stationed to arrest him the moment he was spotted. You can only imagine the toll this must have taken on your poor mother or the stress your father had to go through; living day to day while wondering if it would be their last.

He finally made his way to Miyazaki, where by this time; Kushina was barely hours away from giving birth to you. Living on limited funds, he was at least able to gain the kindness of an elderly couple who opened their doors to the weary couple. All night long, your mother labored while your father sat by her side to usher you into the world. Finally, in the wee hours of October the 10th, you gave your first lustful cry and was welcomed to a world that would only end in a blood bath. For you see, a neighbor – who as fate would have it, had connections to the underworld – had noticed your parents' arrival. Hence, barely half-an-hour into your birth, with just enough time for your parents to give you a name and your father to hold you...there was the deafening sound of machine gun fire as that small home was just about brought to the ground by over ten syndicate members who had surrounded it. Even 'til this day, I do not know how your mother survived, but she did somehow. Perhaps they assumed both you and her dead or they did not care about you since they considered you'd be dead soon anyway. All they cared about was Minato and bringing his head back to the man who sent them. Literally.

The final insult was to burn his body to ashes; leaving absolutely no trace of a man who had once given so much to the Syndicate in his own way. While with Tsubasa, Minato had made such forward-thinking propositions and ideas, which was why he found favor with the kumichō. Under Minato's charge, there was no doubt the Bakufu would have become a more legitimate and respected organization. This was something Tsubasa longed for in his old age, something he knew his hot-head son did not appreciate or understand. In fact, it was clearly believed that Tsubasa's Will had Minato Namikaze as his sole heir, disowning Ryoichi when he learned of his involvement with Minato's assassination. Ryoichi must have burned or destroyed that Will, but if I know Tsubasa, I have no doubt there are still living loyal members who have the proof of your rightful inheritance.

As I type this, it is with a heavy heart for I realize how painful and difficult this must be for you to digest. All your father ever wanted for the woman he loved and a son he barely got to be with, was for a happy and peaceful future, and I am sure even in death, he would still wish for you to continue down that path if possible. All the same, I would be a fool not to believe that the fires of revenge would be stoked within you, and I will not blame you for wanting to punish those who brought such pain and suffering to your life.

I am an old man now, Naruto, and barely as active as I used to be. The Bakufu of old is no longer around, and those I could have considered friends have abandoned me or been eliminated by Shimura Danzo. However, I will make you the same promise I told your father all those years ago; if you should ever need me for anything...anything at all, please do not hesitate to seek for me. I have attached a way to get in contact with me and though I might not be available when you do call, be rest assured that I will get the message as quickly as possible.

In conclusion, I sincerely wish you the best of luck; that you remain brave, courageous, and of good heart as Minato was. For despite his sins, our good God saw it fit to bless him with a living legacy. You are that living legacy, Uzumaki Naruto. What you make of it from here on out...is completely up to you.

- Jiraiya no Gama Sennin

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke:<em>

It should have been a jovial, festive atmosphere, considering there was a hot pot going and we were all in Karin's apartment trying our best to enjoy it. However, there was a noticeable pall in the room; an unspoken awareness beneath the layer of false gaiety everyone tried to put up, and it was slowly beginning to irritate me.

The blond idiot was not with us.

Haku was picking at his piece of meat absently, every now and then glancing toward the door as if hoping it would open soon to reveal the missing participant. But no...not even his favorite drama show being on T.V. at the moment, could cheer him up. Shikamaru looked just as pensive, though he was at least eating. Even my brother and Shisui – though they had tried to start up conversation – had lapsed into thoughtful silence. I never thought I'd ever get to feel sorry for Karin, who had really outdone herself with the hot pot meal, but was forced to now act like a party host in the midst of a funeral.

I slammed my chopsticks and bowl down.

_That's it. I have had enough._

"Where are you going?" Itachi asked as I reached for my crutch and forced myself to my feet.

"I'm going to bring him back," I muttered as I began to hobble toward the door, causing Haku to promptly rise to his feet to follow. "No...stay," I commanded. "You said he probably went to the rooftop, right?" This question I posed to Shikamaru, who nodded with an inscrutable expression on his visage.

"The door between the janitor's closet and the bathroom is the way to get to it, but be careful, we've got stairs there."

I nodded and left the room; almost giving a deep sigh of relief as I was met with blissful silence and no longer having to deal with the doomsday atmosphere in the apartment. Who knew that bastard would have such a potent effect on everyone?

(you included)

(shut up!)

Shikamaru wasn't kidding about the steps. They looked treacherous and not particularly safe (at least with a guy on crutches). All the same, I managed to hoist myself up, one step at a time, and by the time I got to the roof itself, I was huffing like a goddamn steam engine with a light sheen of sweat on my skin.

_Damn it all to hell and back! Why do I have to go through all this for that son-of-a-bitch? _

"And now where is he?"

It was evening, and there weren't exactly a lot of lights illuminating this area of the building. If it wasn't the faint glow of the street lamps below as well as the glow from other apartments across ours, I might as well be walking blind. Still, I struggled to walk through the badly built maze of heaters and concrete slabs before...

(finally!)

...spotting the lone figure sitting beneath on a protruding steel beam against the water tank. How he managed to climb up there, I'll never know. I also wasn't sure if he was sleeping because his knees were raised to his chest and his face was buried against them. He didn't move a muscle even though I was sure the _'clack-clack'_ sound of my crutch, on the ground, was loud enough to wake up the dead. I stopped to catch my breath when I was close enough, and it was then that I noticed the opened dossier with some photographs and documents that had scattered about...probably thanks to the breeze. It was a miracle none had flown off the building.

What had Shisui said earlier...something about wanting to talk to Naruto, right? So...was this what it was about then? The history of his father? Just what the hell happened to make him like this? Could it possibly be worse than what happened to my parents?

"Naruto?" I called out tentatively, then cleared my throat and tried a little louder. "Hey...Naruto. Are you sleeping?"

Thinking I was going to be ignored, it took him almost a full minute to finally lift his head. He looked ahead blindly, before slowly turning his attention to me. What I saw in those eyes...no...what my 'eyes' and heart felt in that moment was enough to nearly knock me off my feet.

(_pain, anguish, sadness...such sadness...and anger...beneath all that...there is a simmering layer of hate and anger...why?_)

The light wasn't good, but it didn't deter from the fact that his face was tear-streaked and those blue-eyes now bloodshot. Goodness knows how long he's been crying to himself, and if I had meant to sneer at him or berate him for keeping us worried, it all dissipated in that instant. This was definitely not the time to start acting petty.

"Uum..." I struggled to find something to say. I had no idea what to do! Do I apologize? For what? Did I tell him that everything was going to be okay? Hah. Even I have to laugh at that pathetic clichéd line of comfort.

"What do you want?" came the question filled with weariness and hardly the venom I would have expected from him.

"Food," I blurted out stupidly before shaking my head to say what I really meant. "I mean...Karin made a hot pot and everyone was worried about you. You've been out here all day. You must be hungry...right?"

"I'm not hungry," he murmured and returned to lowering his head.

"She took the time to prepare it -"

"I said I'm not hungry, goddamn it! Leave me alone!" came the irritated snap that had my hackles rising. So much for keeping it in check.

"I didn't have to come up here -"

"Then go back -"

"Gladly," I snapped back. "You're not the only one who has to deal with bad news, you know."

"I swear to God -"

"What? So what? Your father got killed, right? Is that what's written in there? So you feel bad about it, right?"

He lifted his head again, and this time, the anger I had felt had risen to the surface. If looks could kill, I'd probably be mince meat by now, but I held my ground.

"I know it hurts," I stated firmly. "And trust me I _know_ what that feels like. I don't know your story or how your parents died, but I don't think there's anything worse than having to watch them be murdered in front of you...for no damn good reason."

I hated the way my voice broke at the end of that, so I cleared my throat again and forced myself to continue staring into those eyes that now seemed to waver between doubt and annoyance. "I know...what it's like to feel like you're all alone in the world, Naruto..."

"Yeah right," came the snort of derision. "You lived in a fucking mansion..."

"...with someone I hated and did not know was responsible for the death of my family."

"At least you have Itachi again," Naruto grated back. "Who's gonna come back from the dead for me, huh? Gimme a fucking break."

He turned away to show me his back, but not to be deterred (and I really have no idea why making this stubborn idiot _understand_ was such a goddamn priority), I cursed beneath my breath and began to walk toward him...or I would have, if I wasn't in such a damn hurry and my crutch didn't hit one of those blasted slabs.

The fall hurt like a bitch, I've got to say, and I was sure I scraped my elbows and knees in the process. However, this seemed to get Naruto out of his funk to jump down to where I was lying like a murder victim. Damn if my thigh wasn't throbbing like hell too.

"You have got to be the clumsiest guy on a crutch I've ever seen," he said with a shake of his head, before he offered his hand to help me to my feet. I stared at the offered appendage for a long minute, before reaching out for it and...

"OW! What the hell?" he cried out as he landed next to me after a particularly hard tug of his hand. Still holding onto it, I dragged myself upright and him along until we were both sitting side by side beside the lower section of the tank. I was a mass of ache and struggling to catch my breath, while he was rubbing his shoulder gently.

"I shoulda left you on the ground," he finally muttered.

"And I'd bet you'd walk over my carcass if I was laying dead on the street too."

"No doubt."

I shook my head and sighed heavily. "You really do piss me off, you know that?"

"Ditto to the max," he grumbled and tried to flex his fingers to see if there was still circulation going.

I noticed one of the photographs was close to me, and I reached out to pick it up. It was a picture of a beautiful red-haired girl in a high-school uniform. It was hard to really make out in the gloom, but I could tell that Naruto had inherited his features from her.

"She's...she's beautiful," I complimented quietly.

For a long minute, Naruto said nothing before he reached out to snatch the photo from my hand. He looked at it for a minute longer before biting his lower lip and nodding softly. "Yea...yeah. She was..."

He tucked the photo into the pants of his pocket and raised his knees again to his chest while wrapping his arms around them tightly. There was a long awkward pause before he began in that same soft voice. "I really don't remember much about her. I mean...if it wasn't for this picture, I really couldn't tell you what she looked like. All I remember was her hair and how long it was...that's it..."

"She died when you were still a baby, right?"

"I musta been around three or so, but yeah...pretty young. She was sick a lot..." His voice trailed off, and I wondered what I could say.

"My mom..." I began and suddenly felt my cheeks burning with embarrassment. Was I really about to talk about my mother to this guy? Why would he care to listen to me? And besides, would talking about her really make him feel any better? Guess I should just shut up and –

"What about her?" came the quiet question that had me blinking in surprise. I shot him a wary glance; wondering if he was just indulging me, but there seemed to be genuine interest there, and I had to admit that a part of me felt stupidly...eh..._pleased_ that he cared enough to want to know about her.

"She was...eh...pretty too," I started and promptly kicked myself inwardly for sounding so love struck at the thought of the woman who had meant the world to me...perhaps second only to Itachi on the love scale. "You know the smell of fresh bread?"

"Yeah...?"

"Whenever I smell that, it reminds me of her," I admitted with a blush staining my cheeks. Boy, was I glad it was dark so he couldn't see how humiliating this was. "Does any...uh...smell remind you of your mother?"

"Vomit."

"What?"

He gave me a weak smile that was borderline cheeky. "I'm kidding." He sighed and looked ahead again. "Sometimes...when I was with Sakura...whenever I held her, I'd sometimes think of my mother. I guess there was this smell she had that triggered those memories."

"...I see..."

We fell into another heavy silence, though it wasn't as uncomfortable as before.

"That it?"

"Hmm?"

"Is that all you're going to tell me about your mom?"

"Oh..." I blinked in bemusement. "You...you want to know more?"

"Sure." He shrugged. "What kind of stuff did you use to do with her?"

"Naruto..."

"It's okay...I won't start bawling and shit just because I didn't get to share any of that stuff with my mother. So...you can tell me."

"Ah...well..." I took a deep breath, closed my eyes and for the first time in years..._years!_...I shared all the memories of my mother with the most unlikely of listeners. Surprisingly, I wasn't interrupted a lot, and though he laughed and chuckled at some stories I told, he was respectful and didn't insult me once. I have to admit that it really felt good to let it all out like this.

This really was better than any purification rite I could go through.

"You're lucky," he finally said after I was done. "I don't mean the death of your family...but that you still have memories with them that will never be forgotten. You should hang on to that...hang on to it for your dear life..."

It was then that I noticed that his eyes were too shiny, and that his breath had hitched a little at the end of his sentence. Damn it! I knew I shouldn't have said anything about my family.

"Naruto..." I began, planning to apologize, but he stopped me with a firm shake of his head.

"Don't...don't say anything. All right?" He scrubbed at his eyes and took a deep breath, before rising to his knees to pull the rest of the dossier and scattered photographs closer to him. I watched as he arranged everything neatly, when suddenly...the next words out of his lips had my bones chilling with the bitterness in them.

"That dude...the guy who was sitting next to Snake Dude during Gudan...that was Shimura Danzo, right?"

"Uum...yes...?"

Naruto threw me a dark look over his shoulder. "He was the one Itachi shot, right? The one in hospital right now, yeah?"

"...yes...Naruto what are you...?"

"Promise me something, Sasuke," he interrupted as he rose to his feet.

"What am I promising?"

"I know you've got beef with both Snake Dude and this Danzo guy...but...I think I've got even bigger beef with him than you do." He seemed to grip the dossier a little tighter. He turned to look at me; his eyes dark with an intensity that sent shivers down my spine. I was looking into the features of a ruthless killer; the one capable of taking a life with no remorse whatsoever.

"Danzo is mine," he stated firmly. "If that's okay with you."

"Naruto -"

"I'm going to kill him personally. You can have Snake Dude, but I want Danzo...as well as that asshole leading the Bakufu Syndicate right now."

I nearly choked in surprise. "Are you serious?" I cried out in disbelief. "You want to take on the whole Bakufu Syndicate on your own?"

He said nothing, but the firming of his lips told the whole story. This guy wasn't kidding.

"You...you're insane," I breathed.

"Maybe," Naruto replied with a cruel smile. "But I'm going to do it, and no one's going to get in my way. Not even you or your brother or Shisui."

No...you can't...

"At least wait until we get rid of Orochimaru and then we can all defeat the Syndicate together," I blurted out with something akin to desperation. What Naruto was planning to do was suicide, and I had a sinking feeling that he didn't care if he died just as long as he got those guys out of the way.

Naruto raised a brow. "Together?"

"Yes, you hotheaded maniac." I tried to rise to my feet, and didn't think he'd assist until he reached out to yank me up. "We're all in this together. Isn't that what Itachi said? We have to plan this out, and you rushing head long into the Bakufu territory is only going to make things worse. We do not have the firepower right now. What can five of us do against an army of thousands?"

I could see the man hadn't really thought the whole thing over, and thinking I'd have to literally shake some sense into him, he finally sighed and ran his fingers through his hair as if in frustration. "Damn."

"Exactly," I mumbled. "I know your frustration. If I could march into Byaku-Shinkyou right now and stab Orochimaru in the chest, I'd do so gladly, but you heard Itachi, we've got to get our bodies back in shape and practice with our weapons." I flexed my hands. "Feels like forever since I swung a _katana_."

He gave me a wry smile. "Just as long as it's not pointed at me, I'm good."

"Likewise. Keep that nuzzle out of my face and you won't get hurt."

He smirked and pointed his fingers at me as if holding up a gun, but I slapped it away and returned with a tentative smile of my own. There was an awkward pause before he cleared his throat and asked quietly.

"Wanna see him?"

"Him?"

"My dad."

"Oh..." I nodded; wondering why his decision to show me the picture would make my heart skip a damn beat. Either way, he opened the dossier and handed me the head shot of the handsome smiling young man who could very well be a clone of Naruto...well besides the scar-less cheeks.

So this was the famous Minato Namikaze, huh? He doesn't look as if he could hurt a fly.

"My dad was cool," Naruto said, and looking up at his face, I could see the pride and determination in them; as if daring me to refute his words.

"Yeah..." I agreed with a small smile. "He looked cool."

"He would have been the greatest dad ever."

"Yeah..."

"We would...we would have had the best time, you know? Could talk about motorbikes and share bowls of ramen and...and..."

He was crying again, but he didn't know it, and what did I do? What did a stupid idiot like me do in this moment?

_What I never thought I'd do in a million years._

I let the crutch fall to the ground and for the first time in as long as I can remember, I – Uchiha Sasuke - initiated the first genuine hug I had ever given in what felt like an eternity.

* * *

><p>...<p>

... ...

... ... ...

In actuality, it was more of a 'lunge-and-grab' than an actual hug, which pretty much left Naruto quite confused and a little concerned at the sudden turn of events.

Was Sasuke just using him to steady himself again because his crutch had fallen off? And if so, why the hell were his arms around Naruto's upper arms (at least he wasn't squeezing his injured shoulder) in this awkward sort of embrace that was a bit uncomfortable? As if that wasn't bad enough, Sasuke had pulled him so hard, that their foreheads had almost hit each other, before Naruto managed to duck aside only to find his chin resting on the other man's shoulder.

_What the hell is he doing...?_ came Naruto's panicked thought, which was quickly followed by the realization that this was the first time they were actually this...well..._close_ without trying to kill each other.

Sasuke wasn't saying anything, but Naruto could still feel _everything_.

The warm breath against his ear and cheek, the soft tickle of Sasuke's hair against his skin, the hard _ba-dum ba-dum ba-dum_ of someone's heartbeat...maybe his...maybe Sasuke's...who the fuck knew at this point? Either way, Naruto could feel his cheeks beginning to burn with a heat that he was more than glad Sasuke could not see in this darkness. Even more embarrassing was now becoming more aware of the fact that he had been crying like a goddamn kid in front of this guy.

Would Sasuke use that against him in the future? Oh man...

His hands still hung stupidly at his sides, because to be honest, he had no idea what to do with them. Should he drop the folder he was clutching to return the hug...because this had to be a hug, which was unbelievable in itself. Or should he just remain in this awkward embrace without doing anything? He figured he could at least pat the guy on the back a little to let him know that he accepted the gesture, but in the grand scheme of things...just _what_ did _this_ mean?

Was Sasuke feeling sorry for him? Was he finally willing to become buddies even if they didn't agree on over ninety percent of different issues? And why in God's holy name was he over thinking this anyway?

(he smells great though)

Like a mixture of whatever shampoo he used on his hair as well as something edible...maybe the meal he was talking about. As if on cue, his damn stomach decided to growl loudly; effectively ruining a 'moment' that sent but blushing men finally releasing each other with embarrassed half-smiles.

"Sor...sorry," Naruto muttered with a scratch of the back of his head, and his features still crimson. "You made me hungry."

"...wh...what?" came the slightly breathless query; for if Naruto was glad for the darkness, Sasuke even more so. He felt sure he was never going to live down this 'hug' for as long as he lived, and it would have taken nails being driven into his body to get him to confess just how _good_ it had felt to have Naruto in his arms.

_(the one who ignites you...)_

"You smelled like good food," Naruto confessed and bent to pick up the crutch to hand it to Sasuke. He failed to notice the brief flash of disappointment that came across the other man's face. "Here you go..."

"Thanks," Sasuke mumbled. God, he felt like such a fool, but then again, just what had been expecting? His first hug given to someone he had once loathed and what did he get in return? That he smelled like good food. Pfft. Typical. Should he have expected anything different?

He spun on his heels and began to hobble away; now angry at himself for caving in to a primal, deep-seeded action that was unlike him. It would take wild horses to get him to touch that bastard again or show some kind of sympathy or –

"Hey, Sasuke."

"What?" he snapped with a glance of irritation thrown over his shoulder. Naruto had been walking behind him quietly; the dossier pressed tightly at his chest. He wasn't really looking at Sasuke as they both came to a stop, and if anything, Sasuke was sure that Naruto was looking a little...flustered about something.

"Uum..." the blonde began thickly, before he took a deep breath and looked up to face Sasuke squarely. "Thanks."

"Huh?" Sasuke blinked in disbelief. Talk about being gob smacked. It really was amazing how Naruto had the ability to make him switch emotions with just a word or two.

"Thanks," Naruto repeated; his lips quirking upward until a flash of his brilliant smile filled the darkness. "For what you did back there. I appreciate it."

"Oh...uh...it..." _Way to go, Sasuke. Forming a complete sentence is pretty hard for you now, isn't it?_

He blushed and tried to find something coherent to say, but he was saved the trouble as Naruto gave an exaggerated yawn and began talking quickly.

"Man, I hope you guys didn't finish the whole thing. I am _starving!_" He stretched his arms over his head and grinned at the still stupefied young man beside him. "Come on, already! I ain't waiting for you or helping you down the stairs either."

"You bastard," Sasuke muttered beneath his breath as he did his best to catch up to the man that was now showing off by leaping over the concrete slabs with near feline grace.

God, he hated that guy, and yet, he couldn't stop the small smile that came to his face or the hopeful leap his heart had taken at the notion that maybe...just _maybe_ this could be the start of a friendship he so desperately needed.


	22. 22: Budding Memory

**Notes:** Wow! I am even more astounded by the feedback from all ye lovely folks! *bows and bows again in gratitude* I guess some of you (and probably other readers) felt the first few chapters were tedious and slow but as another reader pointed out (and what I hoped you'd all see) is that everything happens for a reason, and they'd eventually all tie in at some point or another. So 'skipping' or 'skimming' a chapter might make you miss something that was actually quite important. :)

I have been in fandom/the fan fiction world (heck even in original writing) that readers want a quick-fix, but I apologize before hand that I am not one of those, and to you fine people who have stuck with me through this...you deserve special cookies fresh out of the oven! So thank you to: **VioletWylde, saby a, FallenHell, bridmatt, Damp, Morana Whiskey, SilverSauce, little toshiro** (still can't get over that PM you sent me!), **Sen2TOS9, Adevlo.D, Opalynne** (who wrote more than a paragraph, yes, I'm still drinking on your behalf!),**bookwormqueen7, and Hatari**

You all rock my purple-striped socks! Enjoy the latest installment and as always, your words make mine all worthwhile!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 22: <strong>

**Budding Memory**

_The memories of long love  
>gather like drifting snow,<br>poignant as the mandarin ducks  
>who float side by side in sleep.<em>

_Murasaki Shikibu_

* * *

><p>Sasuke-sama's orders were absolute...ninety-nine point nine percent of the time that is.<p>

In the year (and some odd months) he's been under the servitude of the younger Uchiha sibling, Haku has never disobeyed his master's orders. Sure there were times he questioned some of said orders (privately), but his role was never to speak about it in the open or vocally express dissent. As a 'tool' for his master, his job was simply to execute whatever directives were given and tonight his master's directive had been simple – _to stay put._

Easier said than done, when one considers how volatile the current situation could be if no one took the initiative just to check up on –

"It's been almost half-an-hour since he left, hasn't it?" Shisui drawled lazily as he continued to watch the drama currently being shown on T.V. though his watchful gaze was actually trained on the fidgeting manservant sitting across him.

"Just about," Karin replied. She was clearing away the dishes, however she had set aside a plate for Naruto incase he wanted to eat something when he returned. "I hope everything's okay..."

"No explosions yet," Shisui said slyly.

"Let's hope there isn't," Itachi murmured. He was half-asleep; no thanks to the great meal and having had a long day in general. Tomorrow wasn't going to be any easier. They had quite a few errands to run before the tiring trip back to Japan.

"Although," Shisui continued, now feeling more mischievous by the second. "It wouldn't be impossible for Naruto to have taken out Sasuke and is now trying to find a way to hide the evidence of his homicide."

"Shisui," Itachi warned though he could tell that his partner was being cheeky and clearly trying to get under Haku's skin. Shisui was no longer bothering to hide that he was watching the flushed teen carefully.

"It is likely," Shisui insisted. "Or maybe..." He snapped his fingers and widened his eyes as if discovering something astounding. "It's the other way around. Sasuke has finally finished what he started and killed off -"

"Sasuke-sama would never do that!" Haku snapped; visibly bristling at the insinuation that his master was a mindless murderer.

(and yet you know he's capable of doing something like that if adequately provoked...)

"Never?" Shisui raised his brow in mock surprise. "This is a guy who has executed several 'sinners' in the past, right? What stops him from beating Naruto to death with that damn walking stick of his?"

"I...you..." Haku sputtered and turned a bright red; torn between wanting to do the unthinkable (throttle Shisui-san) and running out of the room to stop himself from actually doing it.

"Be nice now, Shisui," Karin chided as she walked back into the room. "You know how Haku feels about hearing such things concerning his dear master."

It was hard to tell if she was joking or not, but Itachi finally cracked an eye open to focus on Haku. "You can see what's going on," he said quietly. "Just make sure they don't see you."

If he could have kissed the older sibling, he would, but Haku spared himself the embarrassment by grinning and hopping to his feet before he could be talked out of it. It wasn't difficult to find the door leading to the roof, and he knew there would be no worry about being 'invisible' as one of his many skills involved being able to blend in with the shadows effectively. His only gripe was the loud groan the first door made as it was opened, and he sincerely hoped that his master and Naruto-kun would be too engrossed in whatever they were doing to pay attention to the odd sound.

As he climbed the stairs, he tried to ignore the many worrisome images that filled his head. He was sure he would come upon those two at each other's throats, or worse what Shisui-san had insinuated. Haku shuddered and wondered just what he would do if such a scenario actually came to fruition. Though he knew he would have to take his master's side, he was sure this was going to be one sin that he was never going to forgive Sasuke-sama for committing.

(just like Zabuza-san's death...)

He kicked himself mentally for that thought. It hadn't really been Sasuke-sama's fault that the torturers in the East Block were too happy at their jobs and had made Zabuza's life a living hell. Still Haku knew, deep down inside, that a small part of him would never forget the dreaded sentence his master had given on that fateful day. If only Zabuza-san had not been such a hot-head -

"Wait...a minute..." he whispered.

He froze on the top step as the memory of Zabuza-san's last words came to mind. What had he said that time about protecting Sasuke-sama again?

_/Listen to me. It's only a matter of time before they come back here to take his head... even that one you call a master...though he's too stupid to realize that they are doing all this for him./_

So was that it then? Had Zabuza-san been a member of Akatsuki? Had he also been a spy for Itachi and Shisui-san? It was highly probable; for though Zabuza hadn't lived in Byaku-Shinkyou for a while, he did still stop in for visits and important meetings. It was surprising neither man had spoken about their dead comrade...or maybe Zabuza-san hadn't exactly been the most reliable of comrades to begin with.

Either way, that was water under the bridge now. Haku had more important things to deal with; such as wondering why it was so damn 'quiet' as he pushed open the second door as carefully as he could. He strained his ears to hear the raised voices, but was presented with nothing more than the sounds of the city at night. He stepped onto the roof and promptly fell to his haunches; knowing that standing up would attract attention as he scanned the vicinity quickly. It took him less than a minute to locate the two figures sitting side by side (not too close though), beneath the towering shadow of the largest water tank at the other end of the roof. For a moment Haku wasn't quite sure of what he was seeing, and he literally had to rub his eyes to be sure they weren't deceiving him.

_...im...impossible!_

And yet there it was; his master and Naruto-kun actually having a _conversation_ without someone threatening to blow the other's head off with a gun or slice it off with a katana. At the sound of a low chuckle, Haku decided that pinching himself might work. But no matter how hard he pinched (and the pain he inflicted on himself), it _really_ was happening! Sasuke-sama and Naruto-kun were _friends_!...well...maybe that was jumping ahead too much...but still! This was progress! And for a master who was extremely anti-social and closed off from the notion of engaging in conversation with anyone he didn't really know...

Haku sniffled and blushed darkly as he realized he had begun to cry a little without even realizing it. God, he was such a weakling. What would Sasuke-sama think if he saw him like this? He took a deep breath to compose himself before slipping back to the exit as silently as he had arrived. He all but skipped down the stairs to tell the others the good news. There was hope yet that those two could end up working well together, so Itachi-sama (at least) wouldn't have to worry too much about any potential 'accidental' deaths while he was away.

"Wonders shall never cease," was all Shisui muttered when Haku recounted what he had seen. Itachi had given a small smile of relief. Karin gasped in shock and disbelief, while Shikamaru appeared to be skeptical.

It wasn't until both young men appeared at the doorway - with Naruto's leading the way; announcing loudly that he was hungry enough to eat a cow – and Sasuke hobbling behind him without a scowl or general countenance of irritation, did the other occupants in the room finally believe what Haku had told them.

"Oh my! You're bleeding!" Karin cried out, having noticed the scraped knees and elbows on Sasuke. She was already searching for her first aid kit. "What happened to you?"

"Fell on his ass as usual," Naruto replied as he dug into his tepid meal with gusto. However, unlike his previous taunts, which were usually filled with venom and bitterness, this sounded flippant and absent-minded. Naruto trained a winning grin on the young woman. "Mmm...delicious as always, Karin-chan! I looooove your cooking!"

Karin had the grace to flush at the compliment, though she returned it with a gentle tap of Naruto's forehead as she made her way to Sasuke. "Let me look at it."

"I'm fine," Sasuke began, but his protests fell on deaf ears as the (quite strong) woman all but yanked him to the floor and began to attend to his wounds.

Both Shisui and Itachi exchanged a quick look before turning their attention back to the blond, who was still busy gorging himself and trying to talk to Shikamaru at the same time. Both men had read the contents of the dossier, so there was no doubt that Naruto must have had a strong reaction to it (why else would he remain outside for hours on end?) However, to see him acting this way, both were smart enough to realize that it was nothing more than a coping mechanism; a way to deal with a harsh reality the best way one knew how. For now, they respected his wishes and kept their thoughts to themselves, though for a brief moment, those piercing blue eyes had met the dark ones with an unspoken agreement passing amongst them.

It would be much later, long after everyone had retired to their apartments and Shikamaru had fallen asleep, did Naruto finally creep his way to their room. He had barely knocked on the door once, when it was opened abruptly to reveal Shisui, who gave a curt nod in greeting.

"Took you long enough," he said as he ushered Naruto in and motioned for him to sit. Itachi - who was looking as if he was ready for bed with his long hair unleashed from its usual ponytail and dressed in a pastel blue yukata that revealed his chest - closed the book he had been reading to give the blond a small smile in acknowledgement.

"I should begin by saying I owe your father my eternal gratitude for not killing my father on that day," Itachi said softly. "At least, he delayed the inevitable."

Naruto, who had opened his mouth to begin speaking first, was stumped into silence as his entire body flushed with heat at the sincere expression on the older man's face. At least one question was answered with that statement. Both men were more than aware of the contents in the dossier.

"Well...you can repay him back by helping me defeat the bastards responsible for his death as well as my mother's," Naruto replied with a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. "My battle is with the Bakufu; to be more specific Shimura Danzo and Ikegami Ryoichi."

"We figured that would be the case," Shisui said with a light shrug, though there was an inscrutable expression on his visage. "And how do you plan to go about dealing with them? You should know by now how the Syndicate operates. Picking a fight with one, is picking a fight with all of them."

"I have a couple of things on my side," Naruto reasoned with a wag of his finger. "According to that Jiraiya guy, there are still those who were loyal to my father -"

"They might be in hiding and not with as much strength as they used to have. Even Jiraiya can only do so much if you're considering running to him for help," Shisui stated.

"We don't know that yet," Naruto interrupted with a firm shake of his head. "Also, we've got your organization...not Akatsuki. I know you guys have got your hands full dealing with Snake Dude."

Itachi raised a brow. "You're talking about the Triad?"

Naruto smiled. "I know these days that they try to steer clear of the yakuza's turf, but there's been a history of bad blood between them anyway, right? What better way to exploit that than get the Chinese to cause some problems for the Bakufu?"

The older men gazed at the bright-eyed teen in quiet disbelief and reluctant admiration. "And I thought you were supposed to be the idiot," Shisui finally muttered. "What you're thinking about is insane. If the Triads and Syndicate got into a battle...it could last for years..."

"...and what's worse, imagine having to give up turf to the Triads anyway," Itachi added. "Even if many do not agree with Ikegami's methods, the yakuza still have their pride and they'd rather die than allow the Chinese to take over their businesses and run their country from the underground. Remember...you are supposedly going to be the head of the Syndicate..."

"Not interested," Naruto asserted with a light shrug. "Like I could run one of those damn things anyway -"

"Then carry on the legacy your father had in mind," Itachi insisted.

"Huh?"

"Your father wanted to make the yakuza more respectable, correct? Instead of leaving it to chaos after Ikegami is taken down, why not lead the organization in the direction of being more legitimate?"

"A yakuza is always going to be a yakuza, no matter how 'good' they want to be," Naruto muttered with a sullen look. He gave an inward sigh and absently watched the lights of the city skyline beyond the sliding doors. "As long as there's money to be made from prostitution, drug trafficking and all those other illegal shit, you can count on them being there. What good could I do? Besides...I'm not exactly thinking beyond the fight with those guys. Who knows?" He gave a bitter smile. "I might not make it out alive, and if that's the case, then the whole Syndicate can go to hell. Who needs them anyway?"

"People like Saitou-san," Itachi replied quietly; causing Naruto to look at him sharply.

"Think about it, Naruto," Itachi continued. "We have a corrupt government at the moment; fat cats who only seem more interested in filling their pockets with the people's hard earned money instead of dealing and focusing on those who need it the most. That's where the yakuza come in. Yes, there are some sleazy bosses in several districts, but for every sleazy boss, there are those – like your father – who genuinely go out of their way to protect small businesses and citizens from becoming bankrupt. Take for instance Jiraiya-sama. He was one of those bosses who presided over one of the most successful districts in the nation. Why? Because he had a heart and was well-loved by those he protected. His subordinates did odd jobs for civilians here and there...they even patrolled the streets and prevented unnecessary crimes from happening. Yes, there were the bad seeds in the bunch; those who wanted to make names for themselves, but even at that...the civilians found themselves going first to the yakuza for help instead of their locally elected politicians or officials. What does that tell you?"

Naruto lowered his head and mumbled something unintelligible beneath his breath. However, this did not deter Itachi.

"It doesn't always have to be about drug, guns and killing people. You can make it more than that, and like I said, carry on the legacy your father hoped to accomplish before evil came in the form of Ryoichi and Danzo. In other words...you must _live_ long after your battle is over. Just as you've survived the trials of being a prisoner at Byaku-Shinkyou, you must overcome this next obstacle and rise above it."

Like he needed to be reminded of his days there. Naruto gave a loud sigh, ran his fingers through his hair, and then eyed the older man with a light shake of his head.

"Man, I really hate the way you talk," He finally muttered; though a small smile threatened his lips. "You just make everything sound like it's no big deal."

Itachi chuckled. "Well, you have such grandiose plans that if left to your devices, I'm sure you'd run out of here tomorrow morning with your Glock in hand willing to take on anyone and everyone without thinking it through. Someone has to be your voice of reason, Uzumaki Naruto." He took a deep breath, shared a meaningful look with Shisui (who shrugged and leaned against the wall with his eyes closed as if shutting himself off the conversation) before nodding.

"All right then...give me some time to speak to the members of my organization...the Triad I mean," Itachi said. He rubbed his chin in thought. "I am already sure they'll oppose my suggestion, but I'll do my best to get them to listen. If they agree to at least meet you in person, then I'll return to take you there. If you can prove to them your worth, I have no doubt they'd be willing to bring down Ikegami's false empire. So...will you at least have the patience to wait for me?"

Naruto expelled a _whoosh_ of air from between pursed lips. "How long are we looking at here? The longer I stick around this dump, the more depressed I get."

"If I had to give you a timeline, then within the next month or two. Remember, I've still got business to conduct in Japan, and I am a wanted man...traveling between countries these days might not be so easy."

Naruto winced inwardly; realizing just how dangerous the whole thing was for these guys anyway. They were taking a damn huge risk returning home in this climate, but hell! If Snake Dude was already on the move, they had no time to waste sitting around here doing nothing.

"Thanks...I really mean it," Naruto said with a small smile. "I..."

He wasn't quite sure of what else he was going to say, but he was saved the trouble by Shisui's next words.

"At least for now you're keeping the peace with Sasuke, which is a good thing. I'm really surprised you guys didn't walk in with major bruises...or maybe you did push Sasuke..."

At Shisui's smirk, Naruto stuck out his tongue. "I wanted to, but he's doing a good job falling on his own without my help. I'm sure he can't wait to get rid of that stupid crutch anyway."

"Considering who made him start using it in the first place..."

"Hey!" Naruto pointed to his shoulder. "He nearly took out my fucking arm!"

"Did you tell him about the dossier?" Itachi asked with a look in his eyes that was hard to read.

Naruto shrugged and shook his head. "Not really. I just told him that he had to leave Danzo to me. I had beef with him and the Bakufu."

"And he agreed?" Itachi asked with a raised brow.

"Yeah...though he was just like you, saying I shouldn't go rushing into things." Naruto leaned back against the wall and bit his lower lip as something immediately occurred to him. Wouldn't be surprising if it turned out to be the case... after all, the last time Sasuke had taken the initiative to do anything, it was only because _Haku_ had told him to do so.

He cleared his throat and tried to act as carefree about this as possible. "Hey...uh...did any of you send him out to look for me?"

"No...why?" Itachi was watching him carefully again, and Naruto could feel himself squirming with discomfort and growing embarrassment.

"Nothing...just thought it was weird he'd come looking for me for no reason."

"He was concerned...as we all were," Itachi replied with a small smile. "He was just the first person to decide to bring you back...and I'm glad that things went well...as in neither of you getting into a fight."

Naruto shrugged and scratched the bridge of his nose. He really didn't like the way his heart had seemed to skip a little at the notion that Mr. High and Mighty had not come to the roof because someone sent him, but that Sasuke had _chosen_ to listen and spend some time with him and not because someone else asked him to. It made those moments of listening to the other guy talk about his childhood all the more...

(special)

...cool.

"So just what the hell did you guys spend almost an hour talking about up there?" Shisui asked with a raised brow in curiosity.

And Naruto, not in the mood to share jack with anyone, stuck out his middle finger and smirked.

"None of your goddamn business."

At their stunned expressions, he laughed and rose to his feet. "See you guys tomorrow, and eh...thanks again for everything."

With a final two-fingered salute, he left the apartment, leaving the two men still staring at the door for a long minute before they burst into low chuckles or laughter.

"He's crazy all right," Shisui said as he stood to peel out of his yukata before tossing it over the lamp to significantly dim the glow in the room. "But...I think you should stop worrying so much about those two. I have a feeling they'll be all right without you being such a Mother Hen."

"I can't help it," Itachi confessed, while shamelessly admiring the way the shadows and light played upon the pale and scarred flesh of his lover. His fingers itched to touch them; his lips burning to taste them all over again. Each scar professed of battles won and lost, and as Shisui fell to his knees before Itachi to cradle his neck within a strong hand, a soft moan escaped his lips as knots of stress were relieved with Shisui's gentle massage.

"He is my baby brother after all," came the groaned words that turned into a low hiss of pleasure as Shisui's other hand had moved beneath the yukata to find what it was looking for. A wider spread of those strong thighs brought a wicked grin to the older Uchiha's visage.

"And for the next hour or so," Shisui growled into Itachi's ear while pushing him back to the futon gently. "You'll forget he even exists. Deal?"

_Oh God, yes..._

And with a sigh of willing resignation, Itachi closed his eyes and allowed himself to be taken away from their reality.

Words would no longer be necessary.

* * *

><p><em>Naruto:<em>

I was jealous. Plain and simple.

It just didn't seem fair.

"You sure?" I asked for the one thousandth time, and Shika, who was now soaking in the tub, removed the washcloth that had been covering his eyes to look at me; pure amusement on his visage now. The bastard was enjoying this. I just knew it!

"Yes...I'm sure," he drawled. "I asked Shisui and he confirmed it. She's coming next week."

"Damn."

I grumbled and scrubbed beneath my armpit viciously; imagining some hot banging babe who would be taking up residence in our apartment in a few days. How was I supposed to deal with that situation when it came up? It was bad enough that my relationship with Karin was going absolutely nowhere (I mean how many times can I walk around shirtless, hoping she'd take a second to admire my abs or something, before it sunk in that she just didn't give a shit). I was yet to have a decent sexual encounter with a chick in what seemed like decades. I could only work myself to an orgasm every other night - and only when I was sure Shikamaru was definitely asleep so he didn't hear the embarrassing sounds I made – for so long. Even my fingers needed a break every now and then.

I had to find a red light district around the area and fast. I just hoped the prices wouldn't be too exorbitant though...

"Don't expect me to come with you," Shika uttered before I was even done with my proposition.

"You don't have to sleep with anyone, goddamn it." I poured the warm water over my head and shook myself. I was messing up my dressings, but at least it was going to be another 'excuse' to have Karin fuss over me instead of hanging around Sasuke like a smitten robot.

"Just escort me there," I insisted and pinned him with my most plaintive expression.

The evil bastard shrugged and covered his eyes again with the cloth. "I'm not going. Remember what Shisui said? No wandering around town for at least a week or so. We've got to lay low."

"I just need to find a district and that's all I'm doing! I'm fucking dying here! At least you're lucky you've got your girl coming and you can do whatever the hell you want with her -"

"Speaking of which..." The cloth was lowered and Shika sat up a little more. "You wouldn't mind giving us some space for...you know..."

I glared at the smirk he gave me and chucked the bottle of shampoo in his direction, which he managed to dodge with a chuckle. "Sorry, sorry," he said, still smiling. "But I will still need you to -"

"Only if you escort me," I retorted. "If not -"

"We'll just move into Itachi's apartment then," Shikamaru said with a shrug. "They said it was fine to use it until they came back."

"Why you...!" I got up from my stool to mock wrestle (or drown him) in the tub, and we ended up making a mess of things; all flailing bodies and limbs. Ten very wet and soggy minutes later, we had exhausted ourselves out and ended up sitting opposite each other in the soothing water that licked gently at my flesh.

"I think someone came in," Shika murmured.

"You're hearing things," I replied in kind; wash cloth over my eyes as I threw my head back and tried to relax. "Don't hear a single thing..."

"Probably went out again when they saw it was occupied."

"Maybe it was Karin," I drawl with a low chuckle. "Bet we gave her an eyeful."

Shika snickered and kicked my shin gently and I returned the favor with interest. We fell into companionable silence, and I was almost about to drift off when I heard the quiet statement.

"About the other night...when you missed dinner...you still haven't told me why. Hey, you don't have to tell me anything though. Just wanted to make sure you were really all right. It's just that I've noticed you spacing out a few times since then..."

Spacing out, huh? I pursed my lips and contemplated telling him everything. What would be the harm in that? Shika was the first person to see me as something other than a 'sinner', and I have come to see him as not just a friend, but a brother (in some roundabout way). With a soft sigh, I removed the cloth to meet his gaze; studying those dark eyes carefully to be sure I could trust him with this information. I saw nothing in them but the same frank honesty and understanding; wisdom beyond his years that made me feel secure in his presence. Besides, I had the right to brag about my father, and who better to share the story with than Shika.

I began to speak; telling him everything the dossier contained and how interwoven our lives were, especially between my non-existent family and the Uchihas. As I spoke, a part of my mind drifted to the 'farewell ceremony' last night. It wasn't so much a ceremony as a gathering of everyone to leave last minute instructions again. If we needed anything Jae was our guy (and he was in the meeting too by the way). I didn't think I'd get emotional about seeing those two guys leave, and I tried to blame it all on Karin who had begun to sniffle as hugs and handshakes were exchanged. Shisui's was firm and quick, though the rare smile he gave was enough to show he wasn't such a complete heartless prick. Itachi's was just as firm, but with a warmth that made me flush as he leaned close to whisper huskily into my ear.

"Don't forget your promise and thank you."

I couldn't be sure if he had kissed me on the cheek because it happened so damn fast and I was sure my face was as red as a goddamn tomato. I did, however, feel something else prickle the back of my neck, and turning around proved my theory right. Sasuke had watched the whole thing go down, and I wasn't sure if he was pissed off or not, since his expression was that annoying blank mask he used to have in Byaku-Shinkyou. The sudden urge to apologize to the guy for what had just transpired with his brother, had me opening my mouth before I was spared the arduous task by Itachi walking up to him and leading him aside.

Good...at least they were going to be too busy doing the whole brotherly bond thing, so I could breathe again. Besides, what the hell was there to apologize for? It wasn't as if I had done the kissing (if it was a kiss...and I rubbed my burning cheek as if hoping I could get rid of it that way). Still, things have gotten a little dicey between us; not that we were mad at each other. I guess it was the 'bonding' moment on the roof the other night coupled with the awkwardness of the 'not-kiss' from Itachi that had Sasuke resorting to his aloof demeanor. Meh, I wasn't even going to bother. Besides, I haven't seen him that much since last night anyway. He's been cooped up in his apartment and that was fine with me. I had absolutely no intention of stressing myself over forcing a friendship.

"And that's the whole sordid tale," I finished with a weak smile. "I've just gotta wait to see what Itachi says, and hopefully get to meet the members of his Triad soon. I've got no time to waste."

"Hn..." Shika looked pensive, and I could imagine why. I didn't really want him involved with this, and left to me, I'd rather he run away with his girl and find the peace he so deserved instead of getting tangled with my burden. "And what about Jiraiya? Are you going to call him?"

I nodded; having made up my mind I was going to do so anyway despite Shisui warning me against the old man's inability to be as much of a driving force as he used to be. I wasn't buying that. Jiraiya had to be able to pull some weight with his former status. Why else would he promise to help me with anything I needed if he didn't have any clout?

"As soon as I get laid and can think clearly again, that is."

Shika chuckled and sprayed some water on me. "You have some serious problems, kid."

At my smile, he rolled his eyes and shrugged his shoulders. "All right...I'll follow you...but just to make sure you don't get into trouble. With the story you've told me, I'm even more concerned about your visibility now. Those scars of yours..."

I caressed them absently. "Don't worry about it. You forget I was on the run for two years from the Bakufu while in Japan." I gave a smile that didn't quite reach my eyes. "I can take care of myself, and besides, this time around...I won't be running away from any of them. This time...I'll be the one hunting each and every single one of those fuckers."

I was unaware of the tight grip I had on the towel or the haunted expression in my eyes as I recalled the final moments of my parents' life. I say both, because I was sure my mother had 'died' that night as well. She had only gone through the motions of living during those early years of my life, and finally gave in when her spirit could no longer sustain her. When Sasuke had asked what smells reminded me of my mother and my initial response had been 'vomit', I really hadn't been kidding. The mother I barely knew was sickly; always throwing up or too tired to move for days on end. Looking back now, it really was a miracle I had survived an execution style massacre as well as a journey with a mother who was on her death bed every single day.

_I guess He wanted me to live long enough to do this,_ I thought with a bitter smile. _God, with His weird sense of humor, made me survive long enough to reward those assholes who ruined my life. Who am I to deny His request? Heh, you could even consider it Divine Punishment._

"Naruto?" came the tentative call of my name that forced me out of my reverie to notice the worried expression on my friend's face. I wondered what he was seeing on mine. "You okay?"

I took a deep breath and gave him a more genuine smile. "Sure. I'll be fine...let's just get the fuck out of here before we turn to prunes. I think my dick's shrinking!"

"There's nothing left to shrink, man."

I pretended to flail in panic, and though he laughed with me, we both knew we were simply masking the underlying terror at what our future possibly entailed.

* * *

><p>Not surprisingly, Jae Weong seemed to understand my plight and was more than willing to assist me in finding the perfect nighttime companion. Or maybe he was just an old pervert anyway. He grinned and rubbed his hands together before thumbing through a worn manga-sized magazine behind his cluttered desk. I had no idea how it could be possible, but the cramped space looked even more claustrophobic than the last time I saw it. I wasn't sure how the guy could work in there, let alone breathe.<p>

"Ah, here is one," he muttered with a nod to himself. "Good price and girls too."

"There's a magazine for whores?" Shika whispered into my ear in disbelief.

"I guess so," I replied in kind. I had never seen publications that openly advertised call girls in the RLD, but I guess they did things a little differently in Korea.

We watched him pick up the phone to dial a number, and after a conversation in rapid Korean to someone at the other end, he hung up and grinned at us; revealing teeth that didn't look so white beneath the gloom of the lone bulb.

"Taxi will be here in one hour," he said in Japanese. "So you boys just wait around and I'll call you when it's here, but remember." He lowered his voice and leaned closer to us. "You stay out of trouble and return as soon as you are done. No overnight stay, got it?"

"You bet," I said with a grin and a firm shake of his hand. _Finally!_ After months of celibacy and near death experiences, I was going to be in the arms of a (hopefully) beautiful Korean chick. Well, I guess beggars couldn't be choosers. If the girl turned out to be average, I could just close my eyes and pretend she had Sakura's face.

_...Sakura's...face..._

It hit me – just as Shika and I crossed the street on our way to the laundromat – that I had not thought of my ex-girlfriend in so long now. Besides the fleeting moment of recalling her words to me about my smile, Sakura had not infested my dreams or my every waking thought like she used to. However, I realized that it was inevitable since the last few months of my life had been spent either being on the run, being incarcerated, being close to death, and repeating the cycle all over again. In the two years prior, I hadn't really had much to do besides brood on her passing, and now with so many other things happening in my life...

(she's fading away)

"Naruto-kun! Over here!"

I stiffened and jerked myself out of my reverie, only to place a finger against my lips to shush the loudmouth. "Shsssh! Remember my name over here." I tapped Haku's head gently as he blushed in embarrassment. "It's Kim Junghyun."

"Sorry, sorry," Haku apologized and bowed to Shikamaru as we pushed open the glass door leading into the cramped and very hot building. It was just big enough to host six large washing machines and dryers, and it seemed like each one was filled with something. From the steel rafters in the low ceiling, clothes of every shape, size and color hung from wooden hangers. Colorful posters tacked on the wall (some of which were peeling off) advertised the latest cosmetics, movies, apartments for rent, and instructions on how clothes were to be washed, how much to pay and so on and so forth. We would have been lost at the guidelines if it wasn't for the accompanying diagrams to go with it. I couldn't read Korean for shit, and Shika only knew so much himself. Haku...well he was pretty much useless at this point, and I wondered where his brainiac of a master was. We could have used his 'talent' to decipher what the hell to do. The last thing I needed was to be taken for granted by the locals.

"Where's Sasuke? I thought he'd be here with you."

"He's preparing to go to the temple with Karin," he replied with a sheepish expression, "So I thought I'd do this today." He lifted the large black bag to emphasize just how much he needed to get done.

"Typical," I grumbled beneath my breath as I stomped up to the tiny cashier's window, where the owner was watching a game show on his tiny T.V surrounded by washing detergents and other knick knacks he sold ranging from cheap cigarettes, beer, lucky charms to women's underwear. I knocked on the grimy pane, and for the next five minutes struggled and haggled with the guy to assist us with the machines. It wasn't as if I didn't know how to use them since I made use of the coin laundry a lot back in Japan, but there was the problem of having to deal with getting the right change (coins), and learning if their machines were any different than what I was used to. The owner – he didn't look any older than twenty-five – bellowed out to someone in the back, and an older lady (I'm guessing his mom?) came shuffling out to berate him for being such a jackass to the customers. I guess it was her hitting his shoulder with her cane that had us chuckling and trying not to laugh too loud.

All the same, we finally managed to get our clothes in the machines and half-an-hour later; we were still sitting in the stiff wooden chairs, watching our clothes go around in circles – over and over and over and over and over...

I yawned and stretched out my legs. I wanted to go outside and take a walk or something, but knew it wasn't exactly conducive. Our job was to run in and out of here as fast as we could, and though a few other customers had wandered in, no one seemed to pay much attention to us. Shika was browsing through a local newspaper, which I had tried to read earlier but gave up when all the letters began to swim before my eyes. I never thought I'd say this, but I actually missed _reading_ in _kanji_.

Haku was mesmerized by the machines. He had never seen them before, since doing the laundry at Byaku-Shinkyou had involved simply leaving the basket of dirty clothes at the back door for one of the sinners on duty to pick 'em up and return them once finished. I smiled ruefully as I recalled those cold days spent eating in the rafters of my 'hideout' while watching the steam from the chimneys evaporate into the atmosphere from those buildings below. If I closed my eyes, I could still smell the waft of laundry detergent and hotly pressed uniforms or bed sheets. I wondered if there were some poor unfortunate fools still there...still toiling away – day and night – making sure that everyone else looked and felt good in clean clothes.

Speaking of the other sinners...how was Old Man Chef? And Chouji? And all the other sinners I had established some form of rapport with during my stay there? Were they all right? Had some of them managed to escape like Shikamaru and I? Had the kitchens been destroyed? I couldn't remember if Shisui had mentioned that, but it would really suck if that happened; not so much that I cared whether or not those damn officers and guards (or Snake Dude) had anything to eat, but I knew Old Man Chef loved his job and took it seriously. Without his kitchen, what would he do? His dream, he had confessed, was to go back to his hometown and die in his own established restaurant. It was a nice dream to have, and though I had felt it hopeless at the time, now...it didn't seem so impossible after all.

/Continue the legacy your father would have wanted.../

It was stupid really...to even consider what Itachi had suggested, but thinking of what he had said...about how yakuza could be powers for change (of the good kind), I wondered if helping Old Man Chef get his own restaurant wouldn't be such a bad idea after all. I stared at my hands in thought. If I had the power to do it...to change the lives of all those who deserved a second chance -

(like Soujiro and his five children...his little Minami...)

"Naruto-kun?" came the barely audible whisper beside me. Haku had all but breathed my name into my ear, and my natural reaction had been to shiver at the sensation of his warm breath against my skin. Hoping he wouldn't take it the wrong way, I gave him a quick smile.

"What's up?"

"You were looking a bit sad," Haku continued in his low whisper as if not wanting Shikamaru – who was sitting across us – to hear us. Not that he should have worried. With all the noises coming from the machines, even the dead couldn't hear us even if we screamed. "Is everything all right?"

"Yeah...I'm cool..." I tapped his nose gently and was rewarded with a cute blush that made him look so damn pretty; it was a little weird to feel my heart twisting a little at the sight.

(if he was really a girl then I would have...)

I squirmed in my seat and shook my head a little to get rid of that errant thought. "So...Sasuke's going out with Karin, huh?"

"To the temple," Haku explained with a smile. "He says he needs to be purified..."

I rolled my eyes. "My ass."

"What?"

"Nothing." I snorted and tried to ignore the pang of jealousy that was rearing its ugly head again. Just what the fuck did Karin see in that guy anyway?

(the same thing you noticed the other night...that beneath the layer of toughness was an actual decent human being)

"Don't get why he has to be so damn self-righteous all the time when he's got just as many flaws as the rest of us," I muttered as the chime of the door signaled the arrival of two old women (geez, where were all the hot girls?) into the Laundromat.

"Sasuke-sama acknowledges those flaws," Haku was saying. "This is why he has to purify himself to start anew. It's like a cleansing of the soul, not just the body. Have you ever been purified, Naruto-kun?"

I barked a laugh. "Nah. The temple would probably go up in flames once I step foot in there. I'm beyond redemption."

Haku gave a smile that was wise beyond his years. "No one is beyond redemption, if you set out to achieve it."

"I guess..." I mumbled, and needing a change of subject, I grinned at him. "Speaking of redemption, how about I show you what a real good time is tonight, hmm?"

"A real good time?" Haku looked clueless. I was guessing he assumed I was talking about a night of watching his new addictions: Korean dramas and stupid game shows.

I waggled my brows. "I'm talking about hanging out with the hottest babes this side of Korea. You, me, and maybe Shika – wining and dining with girls who are ready to do whatever you want at the drop of a hat." I failed to mention we'd be paying said girls, but he didn't need to know the details. "So? What do you say?"

Haku lowered his head and I was sure he was blushing even harder than before. Aw, the poor guy was probably a virgin, but it's okay! That's what Uncle Naruto was here for. I was going to make this kid a 'man' tonight. He'd definitely thank me later.

"Uum...I...I mean -"

"You don't have to worry about a thing if it's your first time," I encouraged with an arm thrown over his shoulder. I hugged him to me a little. "You just leave everything to me and I'll be sure to find a girl who'll go easy on you since it's going to be your first time -"

"You don't understand, Naruto-kun," Haku whispered as if in pain. He finally lifted his head, and the look on his face should have spoken volumes then. "I've...I've never been with a woman before."

"I figured that," I replied with a smile. "Byaku-Shinkyou wasn't exactly crawling with chicks, was it?"

Haku shook his head and clutched fistfuls of his kimono; gaze lowered again as if in shame. "No...it's not just that, Naruto-kun. I...I could never be with a woman -"

"Oh my God! Don't tell me they cut off your dicks because you're servants! What kind of monsters are they over there?"

This was loud enough for Shika to lower his newspaper and to gawk at us in confusion at this line of conversation. Not that I blame him, I was still trying to get over the horrific image of Haku being sexless. God. What a sick, sick, sick, sick –

"I do have a ...di...di..." Haku sputtered. I thought he was going to pass out because he was literally red all over. "I would show it to you to prove it, but we are in a public setting."

I expelled a breath of relief. "Well, keep it in your pants...or whatever it is you wear under that thing." I patted his shoulder gently. "So if it's not being dick-less that's the problem...what is it?" I frowned as a thought occurred to me. "Don't tell me that you have to get permission from Sasuke before getting to do anything like that, do you?"

Haku looked bemused for a second before giggling behind a cupped hand. "No...I do not need to ask him permission and besides, I really don't think Sasuke-sama would want to hear of it anyway. The last time I tried to explain..."

"What happened?"

Haku flushed and shook his head rapidly. "Uumm...just...Sasuke-sama didn't quite want to know about it, that's all."

"So you did have a girlfriend," I beamed and jostled him playfully. "What did she look like? Was she as cute as you? Which would be kinda weird having to compare which of you two looked prettier."

"Thank you for the compliment, Naruto-kun, but 'she' was actually a...a...uh...a 'he'."

I must have misheard him because of the machines rumbling and grinding in the background, but had he actually said a..._he_?

_Think about it, Naruto. The guy's probably lived in that hell hole all his life, and remember that there are no women in the place, so what do you think? Jesus fucking Christ! It really was all beginning to click into place...and wait! What was all that about Sasuke not wanting to hear anything? Maybe Haku had tried to explain that he liked this other dude, and Sasuke was so jealous about it, that he banned Haku from being with the one he really wanted to be with. Poor Haku had to suffer in silence while his master went about pretending to be straight with that Ino (God rest her soul) while banging Haku in the background. _

"Naru...Naruto-kun?"

"Say no more, Haku," I said with a gentle squeeze on his shoulder as I stared into the confused countenance before me. "I understand what you're trying to tell me, and it's a damn shame. Sure it's a little gross that you have a thing for the fellas, but hey...you're an all right dude. Some of the homo guys I've seen in the past didn't exactly do anything to make me want to appreciate their lifestyle."

I shuddered at the disgusting blatant expressions of their sexuality the one time I made a mistake of going down the wrong red light district in Shinjuku. I knew I shouldn't have listened to Kobayashi. I could still hear his laughter when he realized he had played the mother of all pranks on me.

Haku still looked confused and gave a half-smile. "Tha...thank you?"

"Don't mention it. Listen," I leaned closer to him, now relishing in my role as potential matchmaker. "Is Sasuke your type?"

"What?" came the incredulous response that had me covering his mouth and looking around quickly. Shika had lowered his paper again and the two old women were eyeing us and talking to themselves. Probably wondering why a bunch of weird kids were hanging around their joint. I turned back to Haku and when I was sure he had gathered himself, I removed my hand.

"I'm trying to help you here," I insisted with a pout. "If you were a normal guy, you'd have urges too, right? I mean...when was the last time you got laid?"

"Laid...?"

"Slept with some other dude or whatever it is you guys do in the bedroom."

"Ah...um...well..." He lowered his head and fiddled with the sash of his kimono before muttering something unintelligible beneath his breath. I took that as a 'not-in-a-very-long-time-Naruto-kun'. I pursed my lips in thought and gave a nod. Might be a bit tricky to find a guy for Haku, but I'm sure Jae Weong would know a good place to find someone to keep Haku company.

"I guess he'd have to look like Sasuke then," I muttered to myself. I winced at the now familiar pang that made my chest throb. I really didn't know why the very notion of those two hooking up was bothering me (a little). Maybe it was because of those expressions I had seen on their faces in the bathroom; that knowing if we had come in a minute later...

"Why must he look like Sasuke-sama?"

"Because you like the guy, don't you?" I asked with a raised brow. "The way you throw yourself at him..."

"He's my master," he stated as if that made anything better. "It's my job to throw myself at him."

I sighed and rubbed my temple. "Look...do you like-_like_ the guy or what?"

"Like-_like_...I don't understand..."

"Do you _love_ him?" I snapped in irritation, and he must have seen something on my face because he backed off a little and seemed to stiffen as if I had physically slapped him. He tightened his lips and took a deep breath.

"Yes. Yes, I do, Naruto-kun. I have devoted my entire life to him and that's the way it's always going to be until my dying day."

I stared into those determined but shiny gray eyes; aware that with the trembling of his lips, he was trying not to burst into tears. He really wasn't kidding about the way he felt about Sasuke, and I figured that my job/role now was to try to get that idiot to realize the way Haku felt about him. Or maybe Sasuke already knew and just didn't know how to express it back...

(so what was that in the bathroom then?)

I sighed and slumped back into my chair, folding my arms across my chest and trying not to appear as sullen as I felt on the inside. Man, this whole thing sucked balls, and suddenly a night filled with debauchery and decadent pleasures, a night I had looked forward to - after so many long and trying months - didn't sound that exciting anymore.

_Thanks a lot for ruining everything, Haku,_ I thought angrily. _Thanks, a fucking, lot._

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke:<em>

The temple was miniscule compared to the ones I was used to back home, but beggars couldn't be choosers and this was the closest one we could find after almost an hour of scouring the countryside.

I sat on the topmost steps to catch my breath, absently watching Karin as she wandered off to admire the pristine gardens. It was quiet here, with my only company the birds chirping in the trees and the occasional rustle of some unseen animal in the bushes and boulders around me. The grounds were surprisingly empty today (well besides the two monks that greeted us earlier), which suited me fine. I was able to wash my hands, feet, and face at the pool with no disturbances, said my prayers and gave my offerings at the beautiful altar. Its pièce de résistance was a large gold statue of Gwanseeum-bosal (the Bodhisattva of Compassion) which was rather soothing and comforting as I knelt (as best I could) before it while recalling some of the sacred scripts from the Great Book.

_Gwanseeum-bosal sees all and hears all._

From my vantage point, on the steps, it was a breathtaking view of the countryside. With our current living location in the city, it was hard to tell that we were close to such a mountainous area, and looking at the distant mounds now, a pang of homesickness hit me with a vengeance. I missed Byaku-Shinkyou; not so much the other things (aka Orochimaru), but it was my childhood home after all. I missed waking up in the morning and seeing the beauty of the first rays of sunshine breaking over the crest of the mountains. I missed seeing the haunting mists rise over the lake as I took my early morning walks. I missed the fresh, crisp air of living in the North (there was something smog-like and suffocating about the Southern air) or the sensation of fresh fruit plucked from its branches as it melted in my mouth with each bite. Simple joys like that made me remember what Byaku-Shinkyou used to be before...

_What's the point of mulling over that now,_ I thought, with a weary sigh, as I took off the face cap I had worn as part of my disguise. I fanned myself with it (it was a little muggy) and squinted through the sunglasses protecting/hiding my eyes. I couldn't see Karin anymore, but I assumed she had only gone around the corner to investigate more hidden treasures. I would have liked to go, but the walk up the fifty steps (yes, I counted) had left my leg throbbing with the exertion. It was a reminder that I was due for another check up with Dr. Woo soon. He'd probably have to prescribe something stronger for the pain.

Speaking of pain...saying goodbye to Itachi had been a little bittersweet. After fourteen years of absence, our reunion had lasted about a week and some days before he was taken away from me again. I knew it was no fault of his. Others needed him now; others who had entrusted their lives to him and Shisui. I did not kid myself in knowing that it could probably be the last time I'd see him alive, and he must have known that as well because he pulled me aside to reassure me as best he could.

"I promise to come back," he said softly, and to my mortification, he had leaned close until our foreheads touched. So it wasn't exactly the kiss he had given Naruto – which still annoyed me that he would even do something like that in the first place – but it was enough to bring a hard lump to my throat. Crying was not going to be an option this time around, so I settled for squeezing his upper arm hard enough to give him a bruise he wouldn't soon forget.

"I'll be waiting, _nii-san_," I whispered and closed my eyes until he pulled away reluctantly, but only to replace where his forehead had been with a hard kiss that sent a warmth of such an intense emotion through me, that I really did feel I'd burst into tears.

"Be good to each other," were his final cryptic words of advice before Shisui yelled for him to get onto the bus as they were already running late.

_Be good to each other._

I glanced at Naruto then, who was trying to chat up Karin (again!), and though she wasn't giving him the cold shoulder, she wasn't shoving him away either. It was a sign that she was beginning to warm up to him even more. I wasn't sure if I felt too happy about that...why, I had no idea, but maybe it was because I wanted to latch onto something...that night on the roof...that memory of being 'myself' in front of him. Maybe it had meant nothing much to him after all, since his attitude since then had been all but lukewarm. Besides, as long as dear Shikamaru was around, why would he want to bother with me? Seeing them in the bathroom, as they splashed around and laughed in the tub, with such a carefree attitude...

_Whatever. If he wants to act that way...then so be it. We'll be cordial and try as best we can to forget about that so-called 'moment'._

(so why the fuck does it hurt?)

Naruto's behavior aside, I had to admit that being in the temple was a relief, for it felt as if a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders. There is no better feeling in the world than knowing that your sins – at least most of them – were probably forgiven. Still old habits crept in as my heart weighed the decision to accept Itachi's relationship compared to how I felt about such relationships in the first place. It was true that thanks to Orochimaru, my view of being intimate had been tainted and distorted. Orochimaru had never taught me the pleasure I had experienced with Ino, neither had he taught me how beautiful it could be if I only allowed it. With Orochimaru, the idea of intimacy involved fear, domination, humiliation and pain. I really couldn't understand how Kimimaro could survive that sort of a thing on a daily basis. If I ever allowed my heart to be swayed by another person, I guessed I would want the type of thing Itachi had with Shisui; that feeling of being secure, protected, and at peace with the other.

I guess I could find it with...Karin?

I made a face and shook my head rapidly. So what if she had acted like a non-infatuated girl for the better part of the day and hadn't annoyed me for more than five minutes? She was pretty...yes, and her disguise (a black wig and green contacts instead of her usual glasses) had made her look completely different. However, she still wasn't able to conjure up those emotions that made me want to keep her around for a long time. I assume I was pitting her against Ino, who I had barely known (to be honest), but at least, she had come across as more feminine and nurturing compared to Karin, who had some tomboy tendencies.

So how about...Haku?

Even I had to chuckle at the notion. So yes, there was the very idea that I could spend the rest of my life with him, but no matter how much we might try to be partners, there was always going to be that barrier of master and servant between us. I wouldn't want someone to be completely subservient to me at all times, and it would take nails being driven into his skull before Haku would to get into an argument with me. I wanted someone who could stand up to me and yet give me the companionship I craved. I wanted someone who could appreciate the beauty of nature and the power of prayers, while still being able to keep up with me in combat, for I still had plans to take my position as a member of the watchdogs when all this was over and done with. My partner should be able to understand my job and appreciate the dangers that came along with it.

So what about...?

The heat surged from the soles of my feet to the roots of my hair, and I was never more glad I was all alone as I covered my heated face the cap.

Stupid.

Stupid.

_Very stupid._

And not going to happen...

After the way he's already treating me, I was sure Naruto would really not even entertain the very idea. Even when I hugged him (if you consider that a hug), he hadn't returned the gesture. Could I blame him for not trusting me though he had shared a little of himself that night? I was, or had been, an enemy to him for a very long time. Was I really naïve enough to believe he'd accept me as a friend that quickly? That only happened on cheesy dramas, and even at that, the actors did go overboard while acting as if they had fallen in love at first sight.

Still...it was nice to fantasize about the ridiculous possibility, and there was no crime in doing so, was there?

Naruto could stand toe-to-toe with me, that much was certain. Whether in combat or arguing his head off even if he was wrong most of the time. I wouldn't have to worry about him being subservient...

Naruto..._subservient_? Haha! What a concept!

I was unaware I had laughed out loud at the image of Naruto bowing at my feet and looking at me with worshipful eyes (like Haku at times) until a flock of birds flew out of the bushes at the sudden sound. I stopped laughing and chuckled. _Hell no,_ as he would say. Naruto would rather return to the dungeons or face Gudan again than accept me as his master.

Still...it was a nice image...

Naruto...at my feet...perhaps wearing nothing more than...

"Sasuke?"

I blinked and sat up with my cheeks flaming at the notion of being caught in a daydream that would have made the monks or Buddha Himself contemplate revoking my penance immediately. Shifting myself into a more comfortable position, I noticed it was Karin approaching with a concerned smile on her visage.

"I heard you shout," she said with a cock of her head. She looked nice in a pair of denim shorts and a pink tee-shirt with the word 'PRINCESS' on it. Not exactly temple-visiting attire, but then again, she hadn't joined me during the purification process. "Are you okay?"

Shout? My laughter was more like a shout? Figures. I don't even remember how to laugh properly anymore.

"Something stung me, I think," I lied and shrugged. "But it was nothing."

"Oh...well...are you ready to go back? It's getting late, and I want to check out the museum we passed by earlier."

"Ah...okay." I wasn't in the mood to wander around a fucking museum, but she had been nice enough to bring me here, so I could indulge in her little outing, couldn't I? I allowed her to help me to my feet and together we made our way down the steps without me cracking a skull in the process.

By the time we got home, we had not only ended up going to the museum, but she had to stop by two other stores to pick up 'a few things', which turned out to be a goddamn shopping extravaganza. I hoped she realized we were all on a budget and her sprees would be coming out of her tab. I just hadn't expected her to buy me a few more clothes as well. I swear the girl was an enigma sometimes.

"How did your day go, Sasuke-sama?" Haku chirped as I dumped the shopping bags on the floor and he immediately dove to help unpack them.

"I survived," I muttered and hobbled to the bathroom to relieve myself. "How was your day?"

"Wonderful," he replied and began to tell of his 'fun' at the Laundromat (not sure how much fun that could be), but Haku was a born storyteller, and his ability to make something as mundane as sitting and watching clothes dry was amusing. He told of how they had struggled with the coin machines and how the owner had haggled with Naruto over prices, nearly blowing their cover of being Korean-born but Japanese-raised students visiting only because Naruto had been close to punching the guy for calling him a degrading name. Then came the fiasco when Naruto realized he had turned the heater too high and most of his clothing including his underwear had all come out looking two sizes too small.

"We were laughing so hard – Shikamaru and I that is – but Naruto-kun didn't find it funny and when he began to complain, the mother of the Laundromat owner chased him out with her walking stick. It was the best time I've ever had, Sasuke-sama."

"I'll bet," I replied with a soft chuckle at the image of Naruto being chased around by some little old lady. "Is he around?" I asked flippantly. "I didn't hear any noise from his apartment."

"Oh, that's because he and Shikamaru-san went to the...eh..." Haku pursed his lips and frowned as he thought for a second. It finally came to him and he snapped his fingers. "They said they were going to find some girls to keep them entertained. Jae Weong had his friend pick them up."

My fingers froze in the act of unbuttoning my shirt as Haku's words slowly sunk in.

_Gone to find some girls, huh? Of course...what else would he do?_

Suddenly my ridiculous fantasy now seemed even more humiliating to me. This was reality after all. Naruto loved his women. Weren't his fruitless flirtations with Karin enough to prove it? Wasn't his devotion to his dead girlfriend enough to prove it? Had I been hoping that maybe...just maybe he'd want to see what it was like on 'the other side' just like I did? That though I was beginning to get scared and worried at how easily my thoughts had progressed to the idea of being in a relationship with another male – after years of abhorring it – my desires would lean toward the one person who just didn't have an interest in that possibility?

"...strange conversation with him though..."

"Hmm?" I forced myself back to the one-sided conversation. Haku was back to watching his show, but he stopped long enough to look at me with a warm smile.

"I was just saying that Naruto-kun and I had a very strange conversation. He asked me if I loved you."

If I had been eating or drinking something, it would have probably gone the wrong way. Instead, it was the sudden jack hammering of my heart that forced me to steady myself against the doorway. "Why...why would he ask you that?"

"It's embarrassing to admit," Haku said shyly. "But he wanted me to join them tonight, and I told him that I couldn't because of...well..."

"You told him you loved me?" I asked incredulously.

Haku, looked a little confused at my outburst, and shook his head rapidly. "No, no, I didn't say that I couldn't go out with him because I loved you, but because I liked ...men in general over women, and then he started saying something about 'my type' and that I threw myself at you and...well, he just suddenly asked me if I loved you and I said yes, because I have devoted myself to you, like I always have." He took a deep breath, somehow managing to look confused and miserable at the same time. "I must have said something to annoy him because he wouldn't look at me after that."

_Of course he's annoyed,_ I groaned inwardly. _He hates the idea of two men being together and you just had to open your stupid mouth to make him think that we were a couple!_

I leaned my aching head against the door. This was a disaster.

"Did I do something wrong, Sasuke-sama?" came the barely audible question.

"No...you..." I shook my head and straightened up. "Forget it. Just prepare something for me to eat, okay? I'm famished."

It was with an effort that I finished his food – which was actually delicious – but my stomach was in such a knot I could barely get anything down. I _had_ to speak to Naruto. It was a burning need that ate at me like a goddamn virus. Long after Haku had finally drifted off to sleep, I couldn't even close my eyes. I watched the clock like a hawk; counting the agonizing seconds while my imagination took flight in ways that only did more to torture my already swirling mind.

Who would he pick tonight? A girl that looked like his precious Sakura or maybe someone who looked like Karin? Would he put his hands all over her...touch her in places that would make her sigh with pleasure as Ino had done when I did the same? Would he allow the girl to kneel at his feet and to savor him as Ino had? If so...how would he sound when he was in the throes of passion? How would his face look when he was at the brink of no return? Would he be forceful when he took her, for I doubted Naruto understood the first thing about being a gentle lover. I sucked in a harsh breath at the sinful images that came rapidly with each descent of my thought processes. I had to lie on my stomach to control the ache that was now so painful, I could barely breathe. I swore I wouldn't touch myself; after all I had just spent half of my day at a temple begging for forgiveness. How weak in my faith would I be if I gave in to temptation so quickly?

_I hope whichever slut he ends up with tonight leaves him unsatisfied,_ I thought bitterly only to stiffen (no pun intended) when I finally heard the sounds of the duo returning. It was almost midnight.

I gave them (him) two more hours before rising to my feet and slipping out of my apartment without waking my companion. As usual, the hallway was empty at this hour and the sounds of nighttime involved listening to creaking pipes and the _clunk whirr_ of the unseen cooling units and plumbing system. I had left my crutch again, but I was fine and felt no pain as I walked gingerly toward his door.

What would I say this time? That I am sorry I woke you up at this ungodly hour just to tell you that Haku and I have nothing going on. Haku says he loves me because it's a love a servant feels for his master and that's it. The way he feels for me is nothing like the way I feel for him and –

_Ah!_

The door had opened before I even lifted my hand to knock on it.

It was Naruto – dressed in his pajamas but with his favorite black and orange jacket thrown over it. He had something tucked beneath his armpit; something I recognized as the dossier he had been reading the other night. His eyes widened in shock at the sight of me, and I guess I must have been looking the same...except I was yet to explain why I was hovering around his door at this hour.

"Uum..." _Say something! Say something! Say something quick!_ "I..."

The shock wore off as quickly as it appeared and in its place was a weariness that made me wonder just what kind of a girl he had spent the night with. "What do you want now?" he asked tiredly. "You really do need to pick better hours to come talk to me, Sasuke."

"I...didn't..."

He shifted the dossier from beneath his right armpit to his left and sighed as if in resignation. "Wanna join me?" He pointed toward the roof, and I must have given some form of acquiesce because he nodded and began to lead the way. He was patient with me on the steps – as I had assumed he'd go jogging off without me – and even lent a hand when it looked like I'd slip off the top step.

In silence we made our way to ...well hate to say 'our spot', but somehow we both knew that was the only place we could be anyway. At this hour, the city was much quieter and peaceful. The air wasn't still as crisp as back home, but it was much better from the oil and smoke-drenched stench of the daytime.

"You should have worn a jacket," Naruto muttered as he began to peel out of his to toss it to me.

I shook my head. "I don't need this, I -"

"You're shivering," he interrupted and whipped out a flashlight from the pocket of his pajamas bottom. He was right. I was only in tee-shirt and sweatpants while he was in long-sleeved top to match the bottom half. As I shrugged into his jacket, warming up immediately from not just the comfort it provided but the realization that I was wearing something he had just worn...and it smelled just like him and...

"I was going to read this again," he admitted as he patted the dossier. "Just to see if I missed anything the first time around." He sighed and scratched his head. "I couldn't sleep."

"I thought you went girl hunting tonight," I asked in bemusement. I was under the impression he'd be too exhausted to think straight. Or maybe my bitter curse/wish had actually worked.

"Who told you that?" he asked sharply before shaking his head. "Never mind. Should be pretty obvious." He shrugged and stretched out his legs. "A word of advice to you...save your money when it comes to those chicks. They ain't worth the _won_ I put in their fucking hands."

I tried to hide a smile of satisfaction. "...I see..."

"But then again, you wouldn't need to do that, would you?" he asked cryptically. I tried to decipher what his expression meant, but he looked away and turned on the flashlight. "Anyway, why were you loitering in the hallway again? Can't tell me it's sleepwalking."

"I do not sleepwalk."

"So what were you doing outside my apartment?"

I flushed darkly. "I ...uh...I actually wanted to clarify something that might have been misconstrued."

"I don't get it. Speak in simpler terms please."

I sighed and rolled my eyes. "I mean, what Haku told you in the laundromat today about his feelings for me."

"Ah...that...look, I don't really give a shit what you and your servant do in the bedroom," Naruto began with a wave of his hand in dismissal. "The guy loves you and that's all that matters, right? Just treat him the same way and you two can go run off and have babies or something."

If I hadn't been so wired up at the insinuation, I might have noticed the irritation in his voice, but I was too busy trying to explain myself. "What he meant was that he loved me as a servant would love a master. That's all. He doesn't actually feel any other thing than that."

"Uh huh."

"I mean it!"

"Okay, already," he snapped; looking genuinely taken aback at my vehemence. "Geez. He doesn't love-_love_ you. Got it. Don't even get why we're having this stupid conversation..." he muttered and tried to focus on his dossier again.

"I just didn't want you assuming that he and I were in some sort of a relationship. We are not like that, so...you can be rest assured. Like you...I pre...prefer women..."

"But you've only had _one_ woman," Naruto said with a raised brow and what looked like a smirk. "What would you know about _women_?"

"And you're the expert?" I sneered though my cheeks burned at the deliberate jibe.

"At least I've slept with more than you."

"Your choices haven't exactly been prime examples of the species, have they?" I retorted with the intent to hurt his pride. "Your first girlfriend cheated on you, Karin doesn't really give a damn about you, and the one whore you finally managed to meet tonight was a big disappointment. Makes me wonder if you...urgh!"

His hands around my throat were unexpected. What was even worse was knowing he had moved so damn fast, I hadn't reacted in time to dodge the sudden attack. He leaned over me; an expression so dark and ominous, I really did entertain the idea of my death in the next second.

"You haven't changed a bit after all," he growled and squeezed harder. My eyes watered, and I reached up to grasp his wrists; trying to pry his hands off me as my windpipe was being shut with every passing second. Breathing was becoming extremely difficult. "You can call me anything you want, but you leave Sakura out of this!"

_You idiot! If she was so perfect why was she with the man you killed?_ I screamed silently and thrust upwards to lodge him off, but this didn't help at all. If anything, it made me aware of one very humiliating reaction to all this.

I was..._excited_.

I hoped to God he wouldn't do something pointless like straddling me, but just as I thought it, my dismay was tenfold when he did just that to get a better grip around my neck.

_Oh God. He's going to know. He's going to know. He's going to know. He's going to..._

"Fuck," he suddenly uttered and released me as if disgusted with himself. "What the fuck am I doing?"

He leaned back and covered his face with hands that trembled, took a deep breath, and then lowered them to reveal a bewildered expression on his features. He still looked mad enough to kill me, but at least I could breathe again, though I was currently doing my best not to cough up a lung. Circulation was gradually returning, and when I felt I could think again...

(leg be damned)

...I reached out to push him off with so much force, he fell back with a loud grunt of surprise and pain. Hardly giving him a chance to catch his breath or get his footing, I straddled him, formed a fist and drove it into his left cheek with as much anger and frustration as I could muster. His head whipped to the side and the evidence of my blow came in the form of a trickle of blood escaping the corner of his lips.

"Open your fucking eyes!" I roared while gulping in air and wincing at how raw my voice was. "Sakura...the girl you so worshipped was cheating on you, remember? I know you want to latch on to the good memories you have with her, but you've got to realize the truth as well! You can't keep shutting it out forever, goddamn it!" I gripped his pajamas top and shook him as if hoping to knock some sense into him.

"Did she truly love you? Huh? Is that what people in love do to each other?" I stopped shaking him and with a low groan, I buried my heated face against his neck to whisper brokenly. "She hurt you, didn't she? What happened that night wasn't just over what Kojima did to her, but what she did to you, wasn't it? Killing Kojima was like killing her too, wasn't it? I read your file...so many times to try to understand and that was all I could make from it. You don't have to keep lying to yourself about her anymore, Naruto. It's okay to be angry at her now. It really is..."

I could _feel_ his heartbeat in the hollow of his neck; my lips were mere inches from his Adam's Apple, and when he swallowed, I _felt_ it. When he hitched in a breath, I _felt_ it. When he made a low sound of suffering from deep within him, I felt as if my damn fucking heart would burst at the same time. When I finally pulled away a little to look at him, I'm sure in that very moment it did. We were literally breathing each other in, for that was the only distance as our foreheads bumped each other's gently. A mere breath between our parted lips, but it was enough to have every damn fiber in my being thrumming with an adrenaline I had only believed I could achieve in the throes of combat.

"You bastard," my blue-eyed sinner croaked as a tear slid down his cheek to mingle with the blood that still trickled down to his chin. "You fucking asshole."

_Yes, Naruto...I deserve your wrath for what I've done._

But instead of showing visible empathy, my lips twitched into a small smirk and with a finger, I gently wiped off the mingled fluids to savor it on my tongue, sucking hard on the finger to show that I truly was appreciative of his tangible fury. I was faintly aware that this was a part of Orochimaru sneaking out from within me; that dark side that relished the feel of pain and its taste, that sadist who took pleasure in watching others suffer at my expense, and like my 'teacher', I _wanted_ and _craved_ more of it...

(more of him)

...which scared the living hell out of me for I was sure I could see and hear _him_ laughing (always laughing) in the deepest recesses of my mind. He had managed to carve a piece of himself in me after all, for despite my pitiful attempts to resist, I was always going to be a product of his upbringing.

_Shit!_

"I'm...I'm sorry," I stuttered in confusion and began to climb off him. "I...I don't know what came over me. In fact...I'll just go back downstairs and leave you alone to do whatever it is you wanted to do..."

I was rambling and becoming more mortified by the second. I don't recall the walk back to my apartment, and though a small part of me wished he would have stopped or called me back, he didn't and I was somewhat grateful for that. I couldn't stop shivering as I crawled into my futon and covered myself from head to toe as if wanting to shield myself from the dangerous path I was taking. I didn't understand what this could entail, but I knew I was terrified of the possibility of becoming the very man I loathed someday.

No one deserved to be treated like that. _No one._

It wasn't until waking up, from my troubling dreams, did I realize I had fallen asleep still wearing Naruto's jacket.

How to explain that to my perceptive servant was going to be another matter all together.


	23. 23: Stepping Stones

**Notes:** Holy smokes! Can I just honestly say I'm overwhelmed by the feedback from you fine folks? Really! I've still got your reviews sitting in my inbox and keep telling myself I'll respond to each and every single one of you, but I just don't know where to begin! It is such a thrill to read your comments and know how much you are into the story and the characters, and because of your wonderful encouragement, I decided to post this up a little earlier than usual! So to my roll call of uber awesome commentators: **xXOtherAliceXx, little toshiro, Sen2TOS9, reconquista, Opalynne** (this chapter was written while drunk let me tell you!), **roro237** (Haku is like my little plushie that I just want to squeeze to pieces as well *lol*), **saby a, Morana Whiskey, Hatari, SilverSauce** (haha! Naruto's POV leaves you exhausted because that's just who he is, but dang girl...will PM you with a proper response to everything else you said), same goes for you **bridmatt**!, **Will** (*bows gratefully*), **Through_Darkness_and_Light**, **Tohru7, wildkurofang** (*lol* I am female...the last time I checked), **VioletWylde** (don't you just hate when characters misunderstand each other and you feel like shaking them? Hah!)

Well, I think I got everyone and to all ye lurkers who keep adding this story to your alerts or fav...remember I don't bite, and I would really like to hear/read your thoughts on it as well.

**P.S:** I am looking for a beta-reader to work on my previous chapters. I know there are probably typos up the wazoo, and would like to have them cleaned up before I post them on my website. So if you'd like to take on the job and can work fast, please send me an email (check my profile for it). Thanks so much and enjoy the chapter!

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><p><strong>Chapter 23: <strong>

**Stepping Stones**

_After one brief night-  
>Short as a piece of the reeds<br>Growing in Naniwa bay-  
>Must I forever long for him<br>With my whole heart, till life ends?_

_-Attendant to Empress Koka_

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><p><em>Naruto:<em>

/_It's okay to be angry at her now..._/

I touched my swelling cheek and jaw gingerly; hissing at the pain that sent a shockwave down my spine.

/_You don't have to keep lying to yourself about her anymore, Naruto.._./

I scooted closer to the low concrete slab to rest my back against it; letting out a small _whoosh_ of air through lips that felt as swollen as my cheek. I could still taste the blood in my mouth...which I spat out with a grimace. A quick run of my tongue over my teeth revealed that though a few were loose in their sockets, there would be no fear of losing any if I spat again.

(he packs a mean wallop that's for sure)

I sighed and tried to arch my neck to the heavens to watch the stars...to clear my head...to fucking _think_ of just what the hell had happened to me...

(us)

...in the last few minutes, but even that proved to be agonizing in itself. Visibility from my left eye was becoming dim; another unfortunate result of Sasuke's blow. By tomorrow, it would probably be half shut, and I was going to have to come up with some believable explanation to Shika; who might not even believe me anyway. That guy was as sharp as a whip. With another weary sigh, I lowered my head (helped reduce the pounding in my skull as well), and raised my knees to my chest to rest my aching forehead against it. It would take me a second later to realize I was shivering, and it had absolutely nothing to do with the cold wind that had picked up earlier.

(he's got my jacket...)

/_She hurt you, didn't she?_ /

_You have no fucking idea,_ I thought bitterly as his voice filled my subconscious again.

I hated the way I could sense the tears springing to my eyes again. I hated how I had allowed his words to affect me so much. I hated how those dark eyes had seemed to flash with mingled emotions of anger, frustration and something else I couldn't quite define. I hated how close we had been in that moment, of how – despite the wound he had clawed open with his acute observation – said wounded heart had begun to beat a little faster...a little harder...so hard I couldn't fucking _breathe_. It was the dizzying, suffocating sensation of a really large object being placed on your chest, as if the very act of taking in air would render me helpless. It was nothing short of overwhelming, and it had all come down to one pitiful emotion.

_Fear._

Fear of what could have happened or worse...

(eager, curious, wanting, needing)

...the fear of wondering if he'd _dare_ to go all the way. I was terrified of the side of me that seemed to want it to happen despite my wary abhorrence to such close physical contact especially after my experiences in the depths of the torture chambers. All it would have taken was one of us to make just one more move and perhaps...

(hell no!)

I shuddered and wrapped my arms around my knees, squeezing my eyes shut and ignoring the stab of pain the motion caused as I struggled not to focus too much on that _moment_. He had apologized, hadn't he? Said something about "not knowing what came over him", but perhaps I _knew_ just why he had acted that way. It was the dark expression; a sadistic, almost cold and calculating gleam that had come over him the second he reached out to lick my blood. It had reminded me of Snake Dude (back in the dojo), and I had to wonder if Sasuke even realized he had adopted some of the creepy bastard's mannerisms. It shouldn't have been surprising since he had lived with the guy for so long, so his actions tonight were probably normal...

(heh..._normal_)

_How the fuck does one define 'normal' at this point?_ _What the hell constitutes for normalcy in my life anymore? Did normalcy include actually feeling my heart beat a little faster and harder, so much so it felt like my ears were going to go numb from it? Did normalcy include feeling my pulses racing at a mile a minute? Did it involve my senses becoming keener and sharper; as if I suddenly had extra 20/20 vision and even the miniscule motion of his lashes fluttering was inescapable from my gaze? That watching those lips part ever so slightly and his warm breath against mine was a lesson in subtle seduction he was unaware of performing? Was normalcy feeling my stomach tighten with helpless anticipation, a tingle of awareness running down my spine and right down to the inexplicable ache in my groin? And all because of ...__**him**__? A fucking __**guy**__...and one I was sure I really despised?_

(Oh God)

I groaned in misery and rocked a little; no longer wanting to think too much about what might or might not have happened. He provoked me. I attacked – maybe went a little overboard with my reaction – but a part of me felt he deserved it for belittling my sexual activities and relationships with the opposite sex.

With Karin, he was right in that things didn't seem to be heading towards the bedroom anytime soon, and I was fine with that now. I knew when my amorous advances were no longer flying with the opposite sex, and I was more than content to flirt with her playfully; something I was sure she was aware of and tolerated as well. As for the whore I had managed to pay for tonight (_sigh_) let's just say I had expected too much.

For starters, the city's red light district was not as 'open' and widespread as some of the places back home (Japan). This 'district' was only a very narrow street with no more than ten buildings on both sides and a police station at the end. A _police station_ of all things! Luckily, it was one of their smaller stations, since it only occupied a corner of the two storey building. All the same, my heart had literally been in my throat as I tried to act cool, noticing that unlike our watchdogs who wore their black _kamishimo_ and _hakama_, the Korean officers wore traditional long-sleeved brown robes (which fell to their knees) - and I believe those are called _jignyeongp'o_ - over narrow matching _paji_ pants. Like our watchdogs, they had the choice of either their swords or guns, and the two officers we had seen patrolling the vicinity only had a _wakizashi_ and a pistol attached to their waists. No _katana_ allowed apparently. They didn't pay much attention to Shika and I, which was a good thing, probably because we were in disguises and we didn't really stand out from the other loitering customers. I was in a black wig and had the collar of my jacket turned up to hide my scars since I had foolishly forgotten to apply the skin foundation to mask them. In fact, the officers seemed quite bored with their patrol, and the younger of the two was engaged in conversation with one of the call girls much to the disgruntlement of the older one.

Another difference between the districts was that instead of going into the houses to put in your request, madams of each house (or their pimps) would holler at you as you walked past to get your attention; each advertising that they had the best girls for you and some even daring to try to yank you right into their buildings. It was strange to say the least, but I finally settled on a madam who didn't look as if she was trying much to get my business. Close to her fifties, with graying hair that was kept in a neat bun, she sat on a stool dressed in a colorful (and beautiful) blue print _jeogori _(blouse), and a flaming red high-waist print _chima_ (skirt) while puffing on an elaborately designed golden pipe. She eyed Shika and I warily and blew out a cloud of smoke before sticking out a hand adorned with gaudy, gold rings in silent command. Thanks to a quick crash course on the district 'etiquette' by Jae Weong's friend, Shika and I understood that she wanted to see just how much we were willing to spend tonight.

I put the bills in her hand, which she barely counted before it disappeared within her blouse. It took her a good minute to suck in another lungful of smoke before she rose from the stool with a grunt and ushered us into the narrow townhouse. Its bright neon sign had symbols I could not make out; though there was no mistaking the silhouette of a naked woman holding a rose.

Looked promising.

The smell was the first thing to hit me as I stepped into the quiet but well kept lobby. A vast contrast from the somewhat dingy street with its smoke and alcohol drenched air, in here, sweet-smelling oils and perfumes assailed my senses which made me weak-kneed and slightly light-headed. I wasn't sure if they had done that on purpose - to hypnotize their customers or whatever - but I had to admit it worked. Why? Because in less than five minutes, I felt I was floating on air; like I could do no wrong, like I was king of the fucking world! I was aching so bad I was afraid I'd begin to dry hump one of the fake plants in the corner just to ease the growing stiffness in my pants. I barely heard Shika say he was going outside to wait for me, because my gaze was still glued to the door the madam had disappeared through; eager to see what feast awaited me.

Just when I felt I couldn't last another minute, she finally returned with a parade of ten girls, and I swear each and every single one of them looked like goddesses from another planet. Dressed in skimpy outfits, they flirted and giggled shyly; each trying to get my attention (money). Though they were all beautiful – and some had gone overboard with their colorful, elaborate wigs and makeup – I settled for the shyest of them all; a brunette with large dark eyes and not too much pancake on her face.

The madam was saying something to me, but I couldn't quite catch it all. I was just too eager to get started. Our room (which wasn't all that big) was just as sweet-smelling, with a rather tacky red heart-shaped bed with about a thousand pillows strewn all over it. As if that wasn't tacky enough, there was actually a mirror on the ceiling too, and my brief moment of embarrassment at the idea of watching myself making out with a woman, was evaporated when the girl immediately hit the small mini-bar and began to make herself a drink.

So much for the 'shy-girl' act.

She helped herself to about two glasses of something strong before offering me any. I tried to tell her I didn't drink (or rather didn't feel like drinking), but I realized I had spoken in Japanese before I could control my mouth. Her frown was enough to tell me I was in trouble. You see, the Koreans had a pretty low tolerance for accepting foreigners as customers, and if this girl ratted me out, I knew I was toast.

She seemed to know she had me by the balls now, and her shy smile became nothing more than mischievous and filled with wicked intent. She rubbed her fingers together; a sign that I had to pay her or she was going to report me to her boss. With weary resignation, I pulled out an extra note, she hiked up her dress to reveal a sexy black garter on her upper thigh, and I slipped the folded bill in there.

_Happy now?_ I thought angrily as she smirked and lowered her dress again, before blowing me a patronizing kiss. _For that, you had better give me a night I will never forget._

Guess I should have wished harder.

She began to strip tease to some cheesy background music, but she wasn't very good at it. Where was the grace? The seductiveness? The 'tease'? She fumbled with the straps of her dress, giggled drunkenly (just what the hell were in those bottles?), and stumbled around a few times. I had to dive to stop her from falling flat on her face, and each time she'd swipe my hand away and yell drunkenly at me in Korean. I guess she was saying she could take care of herself and didn't need my help.

Fine. The next time she fell on her ass, I was ditching the gentleman act and going to sleep until she was ready to get serious.

Eventually, she managed to get down to her cotton panties and the garter, and I briefly wondered if she was going to have sex with me with my money being so glaringly obvious. I don't know about you, but seeing that made this all seem so..._pointless_ and no longer fun. It was a harsh realization that all this...the room...the cheesy music...the terrible lighting...this drunk girl – who had stumbled back to the mini-bar to help herself to more alcohol ...was a sad attempt at finding someone to fill this cavernous hole within me. I needed companionship, yes, but was this what I _really_ wanted? Some drunken chick who couldn't even stand straight...who was now laughing and mocking my scars by pretending she had them on her cheeks too?

"_Mot saeng gin eol hur!_ Hehehe!"

She pretended to growl and before I could say anything, she pushed me back onto the bed and straddled me with thighs that were pretty damn strong for a girl so tiny.

"_Hyung teo ga eol hur!_ Hahah!"

She suddenly 'attacked' me with kisses; which were clumsy, wet, and smelled like cheap sake. She plastered them all over my face and neck, attempting to rip off my shirt until I had to push her off me to remove it myself. The last thing I wanted to do was leave this place with my shirt in rags; though it would have been bragging rights on my babe for the night being a total vixen. She giggled and clapped her hands like a child as I fiddled with my belt and pants, reluctantly admiring how perky and firm her small breasts were. Sakura's had been that firm...maybe a little fuller, but still great to fondle and squeeze whenever we made love. Biting my lower lip hard, so I could forget about my ex, I forced myself to the present and fell onto the bed – now naked and hopeful she wouldn't be too concerned about the scars and fading bruises or the dressing over my left shoulder.

I needn't have bothered.

The girl barely paid any attention to them, and seemed content to let me lead the way. She had exhausted herself already, and simply lay on the bed like a cold fish; barely acknowledging my kisses or touches (well, there were little moans here and there), but otherwise I could have been having sex with a mannequin for all the enthusiasm she showed.

I had lost my touch. That was probably it. It had been so long since I had been with a woman, knowing what made them tick was now a chore instead of an exciting exploration. When I finally entered her, I felt like a failure; that I had managed to do nothing but show my inadequacy and inability to keep her entertained. Oh, she played the role of experiencing an orgasmic bliss well, and almost had me believing she had really enjoyed it when I finally came (after what seemed like a fucking eternity). When I pulled out of her; unsatisfied, disgusted, and angry at myself, her light snore sealed the deal for me.

I was going to become a monk.

I was going to find the nearest temple and sign up to become celibate for the rest of the life. It would suck to have to shave my head, but that was a small price to pay for a lifetime of humiliation in the bedroom.

Shika must have realized things didn't go so well because – God bless him – he didn't ask any questions. Thinking back on it now, I guess the reason I 'snapped' on Sasuke was because he had managed to hit on what must have happened without even being there. Just as he had managed to figure out that Sakura hadn't been such an angel after all, but hell, _he_ didn't need to point that out to me. I had known that all along; had known months before that fateful night that our relationship was over. That the love I had wanted to latch onto so desperately had evaporated when she found someone else much more exciting and 'dangerous'.

When had everything changed? Obviously after I had introduced her to Kojima, though it hadn't been obvious at first. We had still gone out on dates and spent time together...but then...just like that...our phone conversations became lukewarm, and I can safely say it wasn't from my end. I was still stupidly love struck and with my head in the clouds, though I now realize how earnest and eager I had been while she was busy slowly detaching herself the only way she knew how.

"...have to study tonight, Naruto. I've got exams coming up, remember?"

"But you promised we'd go to the concert," I stammered in confusion. "I paid so much money for the tickets because you kept raving and gushing about the band." And I didn't even like the stupid sugary-sweet pop band. It had all been for her.

"Well, I'm sorry," she snapped irritably. "What do you want me to do? Fail my exams just because of some concert? Is that what you want?"

"No...no, you know I would never want that!" The tickets burned in my pocket as I gripped the receiver tightly. I forced myself to sound cheerful. "Well, study hard, okay? I love you."

"I will. Good night, Naruto."

No "I love you" back. No calling of my pet name either. She had just hung up as if in a hurry and I was wasting her time, but then again...I told myself it was okay. She was a brainiac and I knew how much stock she put into her studies. I would always catch her later on.

But the trend continued. She rarely called me, when in the past she would almost get me in trouble at work by calling me every ten minutes just to say something frivolous or sweet on the phone. Whenever I did call her, it was the same thing, she was either too busy or her parents would all but snap at me to get off the line. She would keep things away from me, such as the day she suddenly showed up at our date with her hair no longer as it used to be.

"What happened?" I asked with a raised brow.

"I had it cut," she replied with a twirl and flirtatious pose. "What do you think?"

"...it's...nice, but...you know I liked your hair long..."

"Well, I thought it was time for a change." She had shrugged and looked defensive. "So you're going to hate me now because of it?"

"No, no, it's...just different that's all. I'll get used to it and besides," I had given her a kiss which wasn't returned. "You still look beautiful."

She didn't believe me and spent the rest of the date being cold and distant no matter how much I tried to tell her that I really didn't care if she shaved off her hair. I would still love her. It would turn out to be one of the many agonizing hours spent in her presence, while at the back of my mind; Kojima's warning would continuously mock me -

/"Just be wary of bitches, Naruto. They ain't always as they seem."/

Stubbornly, I refused to believe she was capable of being that superficial. Even when Kobayashi – my co-worker at the bookstore – had come into work on that rainy Friday afternoon with a puzzled frown on his face.

"Ah...so you are in today."

I rolled my eyes and arranged the just delivered newspapers into their positions on the shelves. "Yeah, I'm taking over Kazu's shift today. He's sick with the flu. Why?"

"Nah...just thought it was you with Sakura down at the restaurant, that's all."

I stiffened and shook my head slowly. "Uum...why do you say that?"

I was surprised my voice sounded so casual and nonchalant while my heart and head was beginning to pound with concern, bemusement, and dull anger.

It _couldn't_ be my Sakura. Kobayashi was seeing things. I had called her earlier in the day and she told me she was feeling under the weather; that she had the flu and was going to be in bed all day. In the back room were a bunch of flowers and a bottle of her favorite perfume I had purchased as a surprise gift. My plan had been to stop by her house after I was done at work, hoping to cheer her up.

"It was her all right," Kobayashi insisted. "Can't forget that high-pitched laugh anywhere. I went in to get a drink and just happened to glance over at the booth. Saw her hair and the guy she was sitting with. He was wearing a hoodie, so couldn't really tell, and I just figured it was you." He shrugged and donned on his apron with a hum beneath his breath. "Say, do you know where...hey! Where are you going?"

But I wasn't listening. I had to find out for myself; had to make sure it was nothing more than Kobayashi's wild imagination. Like a mad man, I ran down the bustling streets in the pouring rain; praying hard that it would be a lie, that it would be another pink-haired girl with the same high-pitched laughter with another guy or even better, a girl wearing the hoodie. I skidded to a stop across the busy intersection from the famous eatery; a place many young people frequented and even in this crappy weather, was still full and lively.

Frozen to my core and ignoring the chill settling into my bones, I stood in the rain and watched her through the large landscape window...laughing...giggling...leaning forward towards her companion, who was clearly a guy (from the figure). There was just no mistaking it. It was _my_ Sakura; _my_ Sakura who was definitely _not_ sick and at home lying in bed with the flu. This was the Sakura who had given me disinterested lukewarm responses over the phone in the past week, and who no longer stopped by the bookstore to wait for me until my work was done.

She had lied to me...the first of many it would turn out, and what had I done? I turned and walked away; not daring to confront her about it.

/_It's okay to be angry at her now..._/

_You are two years too late, Sasuke. _

I _was_ angry. Hurt. Betrayed. Broken-hearted. And yet, like a fool – that happy-go-lucky-all-is-well-with-the-world side of me had wanted to remain oblivious. That side of me insisted that I could make her fall for me again, that I shouldn't give up, that she had loved me for almost a whole year for a reason, and I only had to remind her of what good times we had together.

No one could understand why I would choose to remain with a girl who so obviously was cheating on me; even Sasuke couldn't understand why I had continued to latch onto the good times. However, I have explained this before and will explain it again.

Being with Sakura was easily the _best_ and _happiest_ moments of my _life_ until our fallout. Though I had lived and survived through the darkest of times with a cheerful disposition, deep within...waaaay deep inside, there had always been that simmering mass of hatred just waiting to be unleashed. It was a hatred bred from the widower and her physical, emotional and mental abuse as a child. It was the hatred bred from being ridiculed and mocked by others as I traveled because I had no money, no status and no 'brains'. It was having to live through all that with a false sense of happiness and a determination to make something of myself despite the odds thrown against me.

However, Sakura made that hatred a non-entity when we were together. With her, I felt _alive_, and I truly do believe that she had loved me too even if for a little while...at least until her ultimate betrayal.

/_Killing Kojima was like killing her too, wasn't it?_ /

Was it really? Was watching her brains being blown out my innermost wish come to fruition? Had a part of me actually gloated in victory to see her finally silenced? Honest questions with a hint of truth in them, if I really thought about it. Perhaps...yes, perhaps I had wanted to do more than just yell at her when I saw her running naked around that living room; laughing and looking flushed with the aftermath of sex and drugs. Perhaps a part of me wanted to slap her around when she clung to me saying she had done nothing wrong and that Kojima had forced her against her will. Perhaps a part of me had wanted to let her die, but I knew that it was that 'hatred' she had muted with her supposed love that was speaking. That hatred I thought hidden and buried forever was finally rearing its ugly head again; only I had decided to use it against Kojima instead by murdering him.

But then again...isn't hatred a wasted emotion?

What good would it have done to go around with an angry disposition? Loathing and despising everyone I met? What was the point? And though I had my many nightmares of that fateful night, I made the conscious decision to block out those last few months leading up to it. I chose to re-live the happier times with the only woman I ever truly gave my heart and soul to; for those were the only good memories I could latch onto when all seemed bleak. I could not draw upon anything from my childhood like Sasuke with his family, so can one fault me for using Sakura as my fall back to sanity especially when I was thrown into the depths of Byaku-Shinkyou?

For years, I had made a conscious effort not to recall the wounds caused by her betrayal, but Sasuke had to reopen them again tonight with his words; like ripping the gash even wider and watching the blood flow freely. In the grand scheme of things, what he had done was unforgivable, but as I shivered again and rubbed my hands to get some warmth into them, I wondered why I wasn't conjuring up any bitterness for him. Where was the rage? Why wasn't I stomping after him and repaying the favor with a punch that would send him to the hospital?

(because I am so fucking tired of trying too damn hard, that's what)

I lifted my head to rest my chin on my knees; staring blindly at the twinkling lights of some radio tower in the distance.

I was trying too hard to be liked by everyone else but _him_. I was trying too hard to be the 'lover boy' with the sleek moves, when all I wanted was for someone to treat me with respect and appreciate what was within. I was trying too hard to be tough, when there were times when I was afraid and could not bring myself to say that aloud. I was trying too hard to be cool and indifferent, when my emotions were all in turmoil especially when it came to _him_. I did not understand why I was allowing him to get under my skin so much, and I blamed it all on him fucking up my mind during that damned bus ride of fate. If only he hadn't caught my attention...if only I hadn't crushed so damn hard on his non-existent alter ego...if only...

/Open your fucking eyes! /

_Trust me, Sasuke, they have always been open._

/Did she truly love you? /

_Perhaps she did. I do hope for my sanity's sake she did._

/Is that what people in love do to each other? /

_...no...no...nonononononononono...no!_

My moan of pain seemed to blend with the gentle whistle of the breeze that caressed my feverish flesh. I covered my face with hands that trembled, and this time when the tears came, they were of a different kind; silent, hard, fast and yet..._cleansing_ in a way. It hurt (and I mean with my swelling eye and all), but it was a _good_ cry; the kind that I knew I desperately needed to release.

Two very long years later, these would be the last tears I'd ever shed for Haruno Sakura, and I hated knowing that son-of-a-bitch was the _real_ reason for finally finding the strength to let it all go.

* * *

><p>Haku's internal clock never failed, and today was no different.<p>

Whether the alarm was set or not, once it was six in the morning, his lashes would fly open in readiness for a new day. He gave a yawn and muttered a prayer beneath his breath before rising out of his futon as silently as he could. Blowing off the long strands of hair that fell into his eyes, he rolled up his bed and tucked it into the closet space before going through his morning toilette. He would wait until Sasuke-sama was awake before heading to the bathroom, but in the meantime, he'd have to figure out what to make for breakfast.

While he prepared the steamed rice and rummaged through the fridge for the ingredients for miso soup, a low moan from his master had him poking his head out of the kitchen in concern. Sasuke-sama had been sleeping with the blanket covering him from head to foot, but with his restless turn, the blanket was lowered to reveal his master's frowning countenance.

_Probably another nightmare,_ Haku thought sadly, wishing there was something he could do to make them go away, but having lived with Sasuke for so long now; he knew it was something that was bound to occur as long as those horrors of his childhood lingered in his memory. It would have to be up to his master to find a way to get rid of those demons as best he could.

It would take Haku almost a full five minutes later – while chopping the green onions – to realize that there was something a little 'different' about his master.

_Wha...wait a minute..._

He poked his head back out again and stared long and hard at the sleeping young man. It wasn't so much the light sheen of sweat on Sasuke's forehead and upper lip, but what he was _wearing_ that must have been causing the problem. His master was wearing a jacket...and not just any ordinary jacket, but the same black and orange jacket Naruto-kun had worn when they went to the Laundromat yesterday!

But..._how?_

How and _why_ was Sasuke-sama wearing _Naruto-kun's jacket_ in bed? Haku knew he had gone to sleep before Sasuke-sama last night, but his master had been wearing only his sleeping shirt and sweatpants while reading a book. He was sure of it. So when had he worn the jacket? Had it gotten that cold at night that he went to Naruto-kun's room to borrow it? Not that it made any sense. Sasuke-sama had a new wardrobe with at least three new jackets in it. Why would he need to walk all the way across the hallway just to borrow Naruto-kun's? So did that mean that maybe Naruto-kun came to see Sasuke-sama last night and then gave him the jacket? That still didn't make any sense. It wasn't that cold in here and Haku knew just how much Naruto loved his jacket, so why would he give it to Sasuke-sama?

Poor Haku was so befuddled by this development that the sudden smell of burning rice had him squeaking in dismay and dashing back to the stove to turn it off quickly.

"Awww," he whined as he took note of the charred bottom, while trying to salvage as much of the unburned sections as possible. Sasuke-sama wasn't a fan of burned food or food that tasted as such, and as he contemplated tossing the whole thing out and starting anew, a light knock on the door had him nearly jumping in surprise.

"Wonder who it could be this early..."

He wiped his hands on a dishcloth and made his way carefully to the door, though he shouldn't have bothered. His master was already stirring awake.

"Ah, good morning, Shikamaru-san," Haku greeted with a welcoming smile. It was rare to see the other man visit them. In fact, Haku was sure this was the first time Shikamaru had ever come knocking at their door. The older man was already dressed for the day, but behind the smile he gave Haku, there was obvious concern in his dark eyes.

"Hey, Haku," he returned with a nod of acknowledgement. "You wouldn't happen to have seen Naruto this morning, have you?"

There was a clatter behind Haku, who looked behind him quickly to notice his master had stumbled into the low coffee desk with a muttered curse before hobbling into the restroom as quickly as he could manage. He was _still_ wearing the jacket.

"Hmm...nooooo..." Haku replied slowly as he turned back to Shikamaru. The other man must have noticed too, because he had a brow raised in bemusement.

"Isn't that Naruto's jacket?" came the obvious question.

"I think it is," Haku replied; trying to put two and two together and failing miserably. "You say you haven't seen Naruto-kun this morning?"

"No...his futon is empty and cold. He hasn't been in it for a while," Shikamaru replied warily. "And your master's got his jacket on. You think he knows something?"

"If he does, I doubt he's going to tell me anything," Haku said with a shrug. "Have you checked the bathroom? The roof? Karin's room?"

"I doubt he'll be in Karin's room, and his toiletries are still in place, but you're right...I'll go check out the roof. In the meantime," Shikamaru nodded towards where Sasuke had hidden himself. "Try to see if you can get him to talk, all right?"

"I'll try," Haku promised, though he knew it was going to be a little difficult to get his master to open up about something like that. If Sasuke-sama was in no mood to talk, Haku had a snowball's chance in hell in getting the man to open his mouth no matter what tactic was deployed.

As he set out the tray of food, Sasuke finally stepped out of the restroom...but with the jacket slung over his arm before it was hung on the coat hook attached to the back of the door. He gave a mumbled greeting to Haku's more cheerful one, and sat before the prepared breakfast, still not saying anything as he picked up his chopsticks and began to help himself to some of the rice and _umeboshi_. Haku, who usually waited to eat after his master was done, had been given permission to eat whenever the hell he wanted while they were living here, so he made himself comfortable across his master and began to poke his grilled fish gently...

...though every now and then his gaze would drift toward the jacket that literally hung like a silent judgmental lead weight between them.

Sasuke could barely swallow, and it was a damn miracle his hands weren't literally shaking as he noticed Haku take a bite, glance at the jacket, glance at him...and then take another bite of food. This obvious tactic from his manservant, was beginning to get extremely irritating. In fact...

(best to just get it out in the open)

"When you are finished eating, you can return the jacket to Naruto," he finally snapped; trying to act as if there was absolutely nothing strange about the request.

Haku sucked on his chopsticks with his brows raised in surprise. "Huh?"

"You heard me," Sasuke grumbled and stabbed at a pickle as if it was at fault for his heart racing. "When you're done eating, you can return the jacket to Naruto."

"But how did you get the jacket in the first place?" Haku finally blurted out; only to flush at the dark look his master gave him. Oops. Maybe he had overstepped his boundaries. The rules might be more lax, but that didn't mean he had the right to query Sasuke-sama like so.

"Uum...actually," Haku stuttered. "Shikamaru-san said he couldn't find Naruto-kun. He said the futon was empty and cold this morning, which means that Naruto-kun had been gone for a while. He went to the roof to look for him."

Sasuke – who had heard this when Shikamaru was at the door – gave a noncommittal shrug, though his heart was thudding at a mile a minute now. Had he punched Naruto that hard that he passed out? No...Naruto was definitely still conscious when he had run away like a damn coward. Did that mean Naruto had run off somewhere without telling anyone? And if he had, would his decision to leave be all his fault? Sasuke kicked himself mentally for his blunder. While he had brushed his teeth, he had done the same thing; telling himself now -in the light of day – that what he had said to Naruto wasn't fair (at least a little). There was no doubt he had loved the girl, and those tears he had tasted were filled with sadness and regret. He had debated whether or not to find Naruto and to apologize, but if he couldn't be found...when the hell would he get the opportunity to do that? And who said Naruto would even want to listen to him now anyway?

_I wasn't all wrong,_ he thought defensively. _So yes, he did love Sakura, but that was then and this is now. He's got to get a move on and find someone else to replace her. Hell, maybe there's some nice Korean girl he'll meet eventually; someone who's going to be a million times better than Sakura. He just has to go about finding a girl the __**right**__ way instead of being such a brash moron._

Even though Sasuke knew he had little to no experience in the act of wooing a girl (since it seemed all he had to do was stand and the few females he had met in his lifetime tended to swoon for no damn good reason), even he realized that there was probably more to getting them to like you besides being so blunt with your intentions.

(and why the hell am I trying to set him up with someone new when just last night I was cursing out the whore he slept with?)

"I give up," he had groaned at his reflection in the mirror. "I just don't know what the fuck to do when it comes to that bastard anyway."

Thinking too much about Naruto, literally gave him a headache.

"He's probably on the roof," he said aloud as if to appease Haku's worried countenance. "It's his favorite place I think." He shrugged and acted as if the conversation was no longer of interest to him.

Haku opened his mouth to say something else, for his observant eyes were finally taking in the faint red marks on his master's neck. However, at the somewhat downcast expression on his master's visage, he decided it wasn't worth getting yelled at again. He was now slowly putting the pieces together and could only sadly imagine what must have taken place again.

_They must have had another fight or argument last night, _he thought as he chewed slowly and fought back a sigh. _And this time, I think they are both hurt over whatever was said._

He watched his master push around the pickles in his bowl and taking a deep breath, came to a decision. Knowing he was about to tread on dangerous territory, he forced himself to do and say something he never thought he'd be able to do in a thousand years.

"I think you should return the jacket yourself, Sasuke-sama."

He held his breath and waited for the explosion, but all he received was the stilling of Sasuke's chopsticks and the raised brow beneath an expression that was dark and unreadable. Haku, ignoring the near deafening sound of his heart pounding, strode on with determination.

"He gave you the jacket, didn't he? So...I think you should be the one to return it in person and thank him for it. No...no matter what ha...happened between you two..."

_There._ He had said it. He bowed his head and waited for his admonishment; to be told that he could sleep in the hallway from now on, or worse on the balcony for his insolence. He bit his lower lip to stop it from trembling and when he heard the low clatter of the chopsticks on the plate, Haku all but squeaked and squeezed his eyes shut.

_...!_

"I am full," came the quiet words that had the trembling boy lifting his lashes quickly and darting a bemused yet worried glance at his master.

Sasuke wasn't looking at him, but at the jacket with an expression that was hard to decipher.

"Sas...Sasuke-sama...?"

"Thank you for the meal," the older man said and with a light grunt rose to his feet to stretch his arms above his head. "I'll head to the bathroom. Meet me there when you are done."

"...o...okay..."

Dutifully, he cleared away the half-finished meal without another word and made his way into the kitchen, but not before noticing that his master had picked up the jacket again with a tenderness that was rarely seen.

It would take all of his acting skills not to burst into a giddy smile at the sight for there was definitely something in that distant yet serene expression that told Haku all he ever needed to know.

His dear and beloved master, whose _petals_ had long remained in an unyielding whorl, was maybe...just _maybe_ finally _blossoming_.

* * *

><p>Shikamaru found Naruto dead.<p>

Well not really...more like curled up against the concrete slab with an accumulation of drool upon the dossier beneath his right cheek. As for the left looked, it appeared as if it had been on a collision course with a moving truck.

_Ouch._ Just what the fuck happened? Or did he not need to guess? If Sasuke was wearing his jacket...and Naruto was sporting a shiner, then it was obvious that those two had gotten into another argument. Sasuke had probably won this round.

_I swear the two of you will be the death of me...of all of us at this rate. _

"Hey..." he called out softly as he stooped to his haunches to shake the blond gently. Naruto's pajamas was damp from the morning's dew as well, and with his involuntary shiver, Shika was sure the guy was going to be coming down with the flu pretty soon. They might be in the southern peninsula, but they were still in the early weeks of February and the nights could be brutal without adequate protection.

"You really are a pain in the ass, you know that?" he whispered with a smile and slow shake of his head. "Come on...sleepy head. Let's get going."

Tucking the dossier beneath his arm, it took some major maneuvering to get Naruto to his feet and even at that, the blond all but sagged against Shikamaru as if unable to stand on his own. Shikamaru had to half-drag, half-lift his roommate as best he could, and by the time he arrived at the apartment, he was already lightly coated with sweat.

"Oh my," Karin gasped as she stepped out of her room, still dressed in her pjs. "What happened to him?"

"Fell asleep on the roof," Shikamaru explained; grateful for the assistance as she opened the door for them and helped to straighten out Naruto's futon. "Looks like he's running a fever too."

Karin checked as Shikamaru placed him upon the futon, and with a light frown, she nodded in agreement. "Looks like it. We need to get him out of these clothes first and try to boil up some water for me. I'll be back with something to help...and that bruise...good grief. I don't know what's with you boys and fighting unnecessarily."

Shikamaru chuckled weakly and did as he was told, stripping down Naruto to his black boxers and tucking the blanket around him as snugly as possible. He realized with a rueful smile that he was playing the role of 'mother' again as memories of the time Naruto had been released from the torture chamber came flooding back to him. Talk about three weeks of hell dealing with the delirious guy, and yet Shikamaru had failed to mention, to anyone, just how terrified he had been at the prospect of Naruto dying on him. It was bad enough that he was still trying to come to terms with Asuma's passing. He just wasn't sure he could deal with Naruto quitting on him anytime soon. Besides...

"You've still got a lot of shit to take care of," he whispered as he placed the warm wash cloth upon Naruto's forehead. "Sweat this damn thing out and let's begin training, got it?"

Karin returned with some medicine and new dressings for Naruto's shoulder. She worked her magic efficiently yet tenderly; applying fresh bandages (though she marveled at how fast the shoulder seemed to be healing anyway), applying a sulfuric-smelling salve to the cut on his lip and cheek before tacking on some band-aids and then force-feeding some pills down his throat to help with the pain.

"Hopefully the swelling will decrease by tonight, and he should be awake by then. Let him eat as much as he can, all right? I'll be back to check up on him."

Thanking her for her help, Shikamaru prepared to keep sentry over his friend. He had planned to go downstairs to make a phone call to the 'hideout' Temari was staying at, but he figured it could wait for at least a few hours. He had to make sure Naruto was still breathing before it was safe to leave his side.

For the two or so hours, he kept himself entertained by either watching T.V. or reading the papers. So far the Korean press didn't seem to want to butt into too much of Japan's affairs as there didn't seem to be anything worth reporting from that area. He couldn't tell if any actions had taken place with the vigilante groups or if Danzo was even out of the hospital. Itachi and Shisui were yet to call to tell them any news as well. Geez. Talk about being kept in the dark.

Weariness eventually setting in, he was this close to nodding off, when there was a tentative knock on the door. He jerked awake and assuming it was Karin, announced that whoever it was could come in.

"He's still asleep..." he began to explain, only for the words to die out when he noticed who was actually standing behind it.

Shikamaru didn't really mean to act this way, but it was a conditioned reaction and something he was really trying hard to control these days. After all, for the two years he had been incarcerated in Byaku-Shinkyou, Sasuke had been nothing more than another authoritative figure to be feared and respected from afar. They had barely spoken to each other since their escape from that place, and even getting himself to speak to the dark-haired man was difficult in itself. He really did not know what to say to the other man besides necessary small talk. It was safe to say that his feelings were more than mutual, for Sasuke looked just as uncomfortable as his dark eyes quickly surveyed the situation.

"I...came to return his jacket," Sasuke finally stated awkwardly. He leaned heavily on his crutch and bit his lower lip as he took in the silent figure beneath the blanket. If he noticed the after effects of his punch, he kept it to himself. "I'll just keep it behind the door..."

"Actually, you came at a good time," Shikamaru suddenly blurted out.

Sasuke raised a brow in confusion. "What?"

"I had to make a phone call and I needed someone to watch over him while I'm gone. Think you can do that for a while? I promise to return long before you can kill him completely."

He hid a smile at the effect his statement had on the ex-officer. If looks could kill, Shikamaru was sure he'd be dead, but he really didn't give a shit to be honest. They were no longer in Byaku-Shinkyou and Sasuke couldn't wield that power he so clung to, here in the real world. He was just going to have to suck it up and realize they were on an equal playing field now.

"There's a bowl of warm water under the table there," he instructed. "You just keep placing a fresh washcloth on his forehead when the other one gets too cool, and if he does wake up and wants to eat something, there's some food in the plastic container, in the fridge, you can just warm up for him."

He rose to his feet and gave a curt nod to the stupefied new babysitter, before leaving them alone with a firm close of the door behind him and a sincere prayer that Naruto wouldn't wake up really wanting to kill Sasuke at first sight.

The least those two could do was talk and get whatever issues they had out of their system. Goodness knew the rest of them needed their leadership to get this show started as quickly as possible.

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke:<em>

_Goddamn it. Why me?_

I have never taken care of an invalid in my life and now all of a sudden, I'm supposed to take over the role of nurse to...to..._**him**_?

(well, technically it's your fault he's like this...)

But damn it! No one told him to fall asleep on the fucking roof!

The insane urge to kick him awake was thwarted as he gave a pitiful moan and the washcloth slid off with the slight turn of his head. With a muttered curse, I flung his jacket over a chair and leaning my crutch against the wall, hobbled over to his futon to do as I had (not) promised. I don't recall agreeing to Shikamaru's request, but the man had hardly given me an opportunity to refuse. It was as if he was deliberately punishing me for something...not that I could blame him. I was sure if every other damn sinner had the opportunity to teach me a lesson, they'd take a lot of pleasure inflicting as much humiliation and pain as I had delivered to them during my duration as officer of the law.

(guess it will be time to make some serious changes to how things are run when you're in charge again, eh?)

Kneeling down gingerly, I reached for the bowl and swapped washcloths; removing the now cool one and applying a much warmer one upon his forehead. I winced at how hot his skin was to the touch, daring to reach out again to place a palm against his un-swollen cheek.

_Good grief._

He was _definitely_ running a fever, and he looked so fucking pale.

(is this all my fault?)

Maybe if I had just stayed in my room and not been such a determined bonehead...maybe none of this would have happened.

"It's just that..." I began, and then blushed in embarrassment as I realized I was talking to myself. Still...maybe it was okay like this. If he was so sick and out of it, I could finally vent in some way. I changed washcloths and absently traced the slight scar on his temple, probably from one of the many wounds I must have inflicted on him during Gudan.

"I find myself wanting to explain every damn thing to you," I muttered. "Like I feel I _need_ you to really understand where the hell I'm coming from before you rush into judgment. Same as you I guess...except...you really haven't told me too much about yourself. I know nothing about you besides what led you to me in the first place. Your sin."

My gaze fell on the dossier, sitting on the writing desk, which held secrets to Naruto's birth and the reason why he was so adamant on dealing with Danzo and the Bakufu by himself. He hadn't really told me anymore than that, and I realized I was curious to know more...to share in his anger at what must have happened.

(to fight with him)

I sighed and tried to stretch out my legs. "If Haku could see me now, he'd probably wonder if he had stepped into another dimension, but then again...I'm sure he's probably thinking he's already in another dimension."

I still hadn't gotten over his 'admonishment', or rather it was his words that had spurred me into action in the first place. Though he had begun apologizing profusely while we were in the bathroom, and despite me telling him that he was forgiven (not that he needed it), I was aware of just how right he was. Naruto had given me the jacket for protection, and it was only right that I took the time to give it back and thank him properly for it, whether he was willing to accept my gratitude or not. I had come here hoping to say it quickly and dash back to my apartment ( I had to begin working on the damn blueprint) but definitely having to deal with the sick blond had not been a part of the plan.

"When it comes to you...nothing fits into any fucking plan," I grumbled as he stirred a little. "You really drive me nuts, you know that? Ever since I made the mistake of talking to you."

Probably even before that first time we were face-to-face during the sentencing. It must have started all the way in the bus...when he had kept looking at me with that expression that now sent a stab of warmth into my heart. Hadn't I once wished he'd look at me that way again? I must have been delirious then...probably still am. I touched my forehead in case I was getting the flu as well, but no...still normal body temperature.

I allowed my gaze to travel around the room; realizing that this was actually the first time I had seen what the apartment looked like. Unlike ours, which was kept neat and beautiful thanks to Haku, you could consider this the typical bachelor pad, I guess. They definitely had no flowers on their balcony, and it looked like they were more content spending their allowance on cheap girly magazines and a few books (guessing they belong to Shikamaru) that were strewn around the room. Curious, I picked up one of the magazines to see what it contained, and I figured I shouldn't have bothered since its cover of the half-naked woman should have told me everything.

_Dear God in heaven...were women this shameless? Brr...though this one looked quite pretty...wait...what? _

I flung it aside and forced myself to focus on my patient.

"I actually came here to apologize," I found myself saying after another switch of washcloths. "If I said anything that was really out of line last night I mean...but still...I'm not all sorry for what I said because...because..." How to put this without sounding so cold-hearted.

_Ah fuck it._

"She's dead and gone, all right?" Besides he can't hear me.

"You've got to find someone new and give yourself a chance to...to...fall in love with someone who will treat you much, much better than she did." I nodded firmly as if trying to convince myself of that, while trying to ignore the dull pang of some weird emotion I couldn't quite explain as the mental image of Naruto being in the arms of another woman filled my mind.

"There are many nice girls out there just waiting to get to know the real you; not the one who keeps acting like a stupid jackass with the crude jokes and the cheesy pick up lines. Do girls really like that? I wouldn't. I mean...be honest and straight with me for God's sakes. Why would anyone feel it necessary to start up with something as dumb as "Whew...are you tired? Because you've been running through my mind all night, baby." I was mimicking his voice and shuddering at the memory of him telling this to a very uninterested Karin. She had knocked him upside the head for that one. I would have done the same.

I turned my attention to the T.V. – where there was a talk-show being shown and several famous celebrities were watching stupid tricks by ordinary people while commenting on them – and still kept on talking. It was as if I couldn't shut up...as if I was making up for all the years of having no one to really share this with. So yes, I did have Asuma, but...it wasn't the same somehow.

"If I were a girl, and yes, you've called me that several times already...," I grumbled; though I wondered why the notion wasn't so annoying anymore. "If I were a girl...theoretically speaking, and you were to woo me over, I would definitely kick your ass if you dared say something that stupid to me. You would have to treat me like a ...eh...refined lady; make me feel like I had worth, you know? I think that should be the key. Like my father did to my mother..."

I paused and frowned in thought; trying to conjure up the few times I had seen my parents affectionate with one another. If they were, they rarely did it in public, but I had caught the moments when both would exchange a loving look when they thought I wasn't watching or he'd steal a kiss from her before going to work or when he came back. Gentle moments like that...those meant the most, didn't they? That's how people 'in love' behaved, wasn't it?

"Ah forget it," I sighed and lowered my head in defeat. "You wouldn't understand how to be gentle even if someone whapped you over the head with it."

"I would too..."

"No, you wouldn't, you annoying son-of-a-bitch." I lifted my head and shook it gently. "Great. Now I'm even hearing him in my damn mind. I think I'm losing it."

I turned to change the washcloths and nearly cried out in surprise at meeting those startling blue eyes...well one of them at least (the other was barely open) staring right back at me. I could feel the rush of blood creeping up from the tips of my toes to the roots of my hair, and never had I wished more for the ground to open up to swallow me whole.

_Please do not tell me he has been awake for a long time. Please, dear God, if you are up there, please do not let it be that he's heard every fucking thing I've said so far. Because if so..._

"You talk too damn much," he croaked.

_...I'm leaving._

"Hey," he called out when I began to scramble to my feet; with my damn face still burning up with mortification. "Where are you going?" He tried to sit up but ended up collapsing back to the futon with a loud moan of pain.

_I can't be here,_ I thought frantically. This really wasn't part of the plan and why the fuck wasn't Shikamaru back? He said he was only going to make a phone call, and it was going on two hours? How long did it take to make a damn call?

"...ungry..." came the pitiful word behind me as I reached for my crutch. "Could you at least get me something to eat before abandoning me, you heartless jerk?"

I closed my eyes and gritted my teeth...counted inwardly to ten...before nodding curtly and hobbling into the kitchen to prepare the food Shikamaru had left for him. I was trembling...as evident of me being unable to even do something as simple as opening a plastic covering. Eventually, I somehow managed to have the bowl of _udon_ ready, and being careful not to trip over my own feet, I made my way back into the room (crutch-less) and placed the bowl upon the low coffee table.

He was trying to sit up, and the blanket fell to reveal he was nude...well no...he had his underwear on...

(thank God)

...and not caring about seeing me in his near-naked state, he crawled toward the table and waiting food like a man deprived. When I was sure he wasn't going to crash head first into it, I spun on my heels to find my crutch. I was still determined to get the hell out of here, when his barely audible wince had me looking over my shoulder again.

He was eating...or at least trying to, but his mouth was sore and I realized that when it all got down to it...he was in this state because of me. Why would I want to abandon him now as he had accused me of doing? He tried to spoon some more of the soup into his mouth, but the spoon clattered from trembling fingers, causing a curse of frustration to escape his lips as he tried to pick it up.

_Damn it._

"I'll get it," I muttered and leaned down to pick it up. I pretended not to notice him staring at me as I gingerly knelt beside him and pulled the bowl closer to me. "Open your mouth," I ordered.

"You're kidding me, right?" he asked incredulously.

Taking all of my acting skills to maintain a poker face (though I was still burning up inside), I replied tightly. "That or I'm out of here, and I don't care if you starve to death either."

"Says the refined lady."

I died a little more inside at the small smirk he gave, and in retaliation, I all but shoved a spoonful of the soup into his mouth; pain or not. His cry and subsequent dramatic wail as he fell back to the futon had me threatening to walk out again if he didn't behave himself.

"God, you..."

"...piss me off," he finished and swallowed as I thrust another spoonful of the broth between his lips to shut him up again. I stubbornly kept my gaze at the floating slices of cucumber and noodles; wondering if I could just toss the whole thing on his head and get it over and done with. I was never going to live down talking to 'myself' for as long as I lived. I blamed it on loneliness...pure and simple. Naruto was the only 'peer' I had been this close to, and thanks to the other night – where he had prodded me to talk – like a dam I was ready to spill everything and anything at the drop of a hat. This was unnerving and unlike me.

_Ten more spoons...ten more spoons and I'll be out of here..._

"About last night," he began.

"Here," I insisted and shoved another spoonful in his mouth. I didn't want to talk about it.

He swallowed and tried again. "Look -"

"Almost done," I interrupted and was about to put another in his mouth, but like a child, he turned his head away and reached out to grab my wrist at the same time to still my movements. I ignored the jolt that shot up my arm at his touch and with a jerk; released myself from his grip.

"We need to talk," he rasped with a frown, and I knew there was no way I could get out of this any longer.

"Fine," I replied with as much boredom as I could muster. "Talk away."

"First off, I accept your apology." He smiled and I was sure I was doing a very good job of imitating a tomato at this point. "Secondly, this was a pretty crappy way of making me realize I had to finally get over Sakura." He pointed to his cheek.

"Uumm...hello?" I lowered the turtleneck I was wearing to reveal the faint, but still obvious marks his hands had left on my neck. "What's this?"

"Ah...well...compared to my tattoo," he sneered, "yours is like a hickey."

"...hickey?" I raised a brow. "What the hell is that?"

"It's ..."

Was it my imagination or was it his turn to look a little flustered?

"...you really don't know anything, do you?" he muttered and shook his head. He shivered and I imagined it was his fever returning. Before I could stop myself, I reached out to touch his forehead, but it was warm compared to how hot it had been earlier. It would take me a second later to realize he had flinched a little at my action, and I removed my hand quickly; feeling something ache within me at the idea that now fully awake, it was natural for my touch to be repulsive to him. Besides, after my antics last night, I had given him no reason to even welcome them at all.

"I just wanted to make sure you didn't have a fever," I defended myself with as nonchalant a shrug as I could manage. "Anyway, if we are done talking -"

"I was just getting started," he interrupted with a shake of his head. He dragged the bowl toward him and using the chopsticks, tried to pluck out a cucumber slice. "We've never really had a decent conversation without wanting to clobber each other to death, so I'm kinda glad I got to hear your side of things while I was 'asleep'. I guess we do better when the other is not conscious."

"You heard everything though," I argued. "You were _pretending_ to be asleep."

"Hey...I didn't interrupt you," he argued back, but with a light smirk. "So now, _you_ shut up and listen to _me_."

I opened my mouth to protest, but he placed his chopsticks against my lips to silence me.

"For the next few weeks...or until your brother and Shisui return, we are on our own, right? And we had specific instructions to do whatever we could to work together and prepare for our return back home, right? So...why don't we put aside our differences – as many as they are – and try to get along as best we can? We can start off by working on the blueprints together."

He gave me a smile that really lit up his one good eye, and I hated to admit the immediate effect this had on me. It really did feel like being hit with a sudden burst of sunshine (as stupid as that sounded), but imagine waking up, opening your windows and suddenly being bathed by the warmth of the sun's rays. That was what a genuine smile from this blond fool felt like. How embarrassing to admit or tell him in person.

"You are good at the underground stuff, yeah?" he continued, completely oblivious to my turmoil. "And I know most of the areas you officers rarely visit."

"I also know most of the administrative and senior officers living quarters..."

"Well there you go," he said with a nod of his head and a wave of his chopsticks. "If we get started this afternoon...well...when my eye gets better...we can probably get a lot done by next week."

"...I guess..."

"You don't have to look so fucking depressed having to work with me."

"I am not depressed. I was just...thinking..."

"Of what? I do know how to read and write."

_What?_ "What the hell are you talking about?"

"You were probably thinking that I couldn't read or write or that I wouldn't know what I was doing, right?"

I slapped his forehead gently. "Good God, man. You really do have a inferiority complex, you know that? I wasn't thinking of anything of the sort. I've seen you write your name before."

"..."

"...and I'm sure you know a few other words too." I was trying not to smile; I really was, but I could tell he was getting upset – or rather he didn't know whether I was really teasing him or not (which was strange in itself that I would be teasing him at all), but he finally settled for grabbing a book that was in Japanese and he opened the first page to read the first few lines to me.

"There. Happy now, _sensei_?"

I smirked and reached for the Korean newspaper, where I proceeded to read an entire paragraph of some boring article about a new construction starting up in the southern region. When I was done, I lowered the paper and prepared to look at him with smug satisfaction, but was stumped into embarrassed silence at the genuine look of admiration on his features.

"I wish I could do that," he finally admitted with what I was sure was great reluctance. "I know only a couple of words...would really help if I could blend in with the crowd here..."

"I could teach you..." I blurted out and burned at the look of surprise I received. "Well...you and Haku and Shikamaru," I amended quickly. I didn't want to give him the impression that he was receiving any special treatment. "So while we're working on the blueprints, we could have lessons."

"Hmm..."

"Hmm...what?"

"What's in it for you?" he asked with a wary frown. "You being so nice all of a sudden."

"Because you just said it, didn't you? We have to put aside our differences and achieve our goals...together, right?"

"Fair enough." He chewed on the cucumber slice, though I could see it was with an effort. I decided I'd let him get some rest and leave as politely as I could. However, there was still something bothering me and my curiosity sought to have my query appeased lest it continue bugging me for the rest of the day.

"Uum..."

"What?" he asked while swirling around the noodles as if seeking lost treasure.

"You mentioned something about a hickey earlier...and I still want to know what it is," I reminded him.

He eyed me for an uncomfortable long minute – as if deciding whether or not to indulge my request - before giving a slight quirk of his lips.

"A hickey is something to be shown, not just talked about," came the low drawl that was faintly tinged with, what I was sure was, amusement.

Still, I was confused. "Sho...shown?" I looked around the room perhaps assuming he meant something tangible. "Where is it?"

With a dramatic sigh, he set down the chopsticks and motioned for me to come closer with a wave of his hand. I stiffened and for some reason...

(his eye...eyes...why...why do they appear...heated...)

...felt my heart begin to thud a little faster.

"You want to see it, don't you?" he urged with a grin that was nothing short of mischievous. The heat hadn't dissipated, or maybe I was the one beginning to sweat a little. "Then come here."

"Is it where you're sitting?" I asked carefully, while trying to crane my neck to see if there was anything next to him.

His eyes sparkled with mirth and something else I couldn't quite make out. "Pretty much..."

"Ah..." I swallowed tightly. "Okay..."

_Breathe, Sasuke. Breathebreathebreathe...so what if you're just going to sit closer to him? Good grief, it's not as if it's the first time it's happening. Take a deep breath and fucking relax!_

I scooted as close as I could, but he didn't seem satisfied. Closer _still_? What the hell?

"Isn't this close enough?" I asked in near desperation. We were almost as close as we had been last night, and just the memory of how I had _seen_ and _felt_ every damn thing almost made me light-headed.

"Naruto..." I was embarrassed to hear my voice come out in a near whine of desperation. "Isn't this...?"

"Close enough," he whispered and before I could think of just what he was planning to do -

_Oh... my... God! _

...his quick reflexes had kicked in again, for he had moved in so fast, yanked down my turtleneck with a strong hand and was now sucking hard on the very area he had tried to choke me to death last night.

_Oh shit! Not there...!_

Right at the sensitive region between the hollow of my neck and my shoulder, Naruto's lips and teeth were wracking a whole new kind of havoc on my senses. I squeezed my eyes shut and waited for the nauseating wave of revulsion to hit me; waited anxiously (my stomach in tight knots) for the subconscious reaction I had to Orochimaru's touches to have me pushing Naruto away and yet...

_I can't...fucking...breathe..._

I didn't _dare_ breathe, for this was beyond anything I could have possibly imagined..._ever_. This was no Orochimaru. This was nothing like that perverted son-of-a-bitch.

Instead of disgust, I was swimming in a world of pain and a pleasure so potent, every nerve ending in my body tingled with acute awareness of this man before me. My skin burned with not just the expertise his lips displayed, but the co-mingling sensation of his unshaved whiskers and the gentle flutter of that spiky golden hair beneath my chin and against my cheek.

_Feels...so...good..._

I have no idea who moaned (though I'm guessing it's me), and I could only reach up to grip his upper arm so tightly to steady myself as I trembled; knowing damn well I was going to leave a 'hickey' of another kind on his flesh. In delirious resignation, I arched my neck to give him better access...for him to take as much more as he wanted...to never stop making me feel this surge of adrenaline that sent shots of heat down to growing ache in my nether region.

"Oh fuck..." I panted breathlessly. I was falling...falling...falling...

**Thud.**

"Ouch," I grunted as the back of my head made hard (and painful) contact with the floor. Finally (no! don't stop!), my tormentor released me with a loud smack and lingering lick of the new and undeniable bruise he had left behind on the sensitive flesh.

"There," he breathed huskily as he pulled back to admire his handiwork. "Now _that_...is a hickey." He smiled as I burned in response. "Told you it's something to be shown besides..." He leaned forward again and this time, left nothing more than a feather of a kiss that had me shivering in near giddy pleasure. I swear...one more touch and I was sure I was going to explode in the most embarrassing way possible.

"I've left my mark on you," he stated with a smirk of satisfaction.

He rose to his feet; albeit unsteadily, to head to the restroom, but he wasn't quick enough to hide just how much what had transpired between us had affected him as well. And as I sat up slowly and caressed the still tingling flesh where Naruto's lips had taken control in the most intimate way yet, I bit my lower lip and struggled not to break into a smirk as well.

/I've left my mark on you./

Ah, Uzumaki Naruto...you really have no fucking idea how true that is.

* * *

><p>"Well?" Haku whispered harshly as he watched Shikamaru shut the door behind him as silently as he had opened it.<p>

There was a confusing mingle of emotions on the other man's face, and Haku, who had been hopping from one foot to another in impatience - after Karin had told him of Naruto's fever - was just about ready to shake Shikamaru into giving an answer.

"Can I see him now?" he asked again.

"I think we should give them a few more minutes," Shikamaru finally replied with a small smile. "They are...uh...a little busy right now."

"Busy? Busy doing what?"

_You do not want to know, kid._

"Let's go play _shogi_," he said instead, as he wrapped an arm across Haku's shoulder and led him back towards Karin's apartment. "You know how to play it, don't you?"

"Yes, but..."

Haku glanced over his shoulder with concern at the shut door leading to Apartment 632. He had no idea what Shikamaru-san had seen, but whatever it was he could only hope that his master and Naruto were finally coming to some sort of understanding.

* * *

><p><em>Naruto:<em>

...

... ... ...

_I am so fucking dead!_

I sank to my knees before the sink and squeezed my eyes shut; the shakes coming hard with a vengeance as I realized just what the hell I had done.

_What the hell is wrong with me?_

Did I actually just give Uchiha Sasuke a ... a..._hickey_? Had I actually opened my big, fat mouth to brag about it having to be something to be 'shown'? Had I actually dared do it?

"I need some serious therapy," I whispered feverishly as I held my aching head between my hands and shook it from side to side in dismay.

It was all well and good to act as if I was so cool and in control, but I tried to blame it on the fever which was still making me slightly dizzy to be honest.

(yeah right...you know exactly why you're still shaking like a fucking leaf and have a goddamn boner in your boxers)

"Oh God..." I moaned in misery.

"Naruto?" came the tentative call that had me looking up with sheer panic and a frenzied thudding of my heart. For a brief second, I really did forget how to speak – my lips felt frozen, my tongue heavy but I must have somehow managed to say something because he continued.

"I'm going back to my apartment. Make sure you get some rest, all right?"

"Yes, Mother," I replied on autopilot and promptly kicked myself for sounding so snarky. I waited for the retort from him, but I got nothing in return. It wasn't until I heard the outer door closing, did I finally dare to breathe again.

_Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck!_ _This is so not good._

I tried to look at myself in the mirror and couldn't even do it. All I would see was a stranger in place of the Uzumaki Naruto I once knew. Where was the Naruto who had shuddered and cringed at the notion of touching another male in such an intimate way, let alone the very man who had sent you to the chambers where you had almost lost your damn mind? Where was the Naruto who had – _just last night_ – contemplated giving Sasuke the cold shoulder for the duration of their stay here?

I knew exactly where he had gone. He had slunk into the shadows the moment he lifted his eyes wearily to hear the quiet monologue being uttered by his companion. At first I was confused as to why Sasuke was in our apartment (or how I even got there in the first place since the last thing I remember was conking out on the roof), but I figured he had stayed to make up for what he did last night. That was confirmed with his apology...even though he assumed I was still asleep. I did consider waking up and surprising him, but a part of me felt it would be better to remain silent; to simply let him talk...and what a revelation it had been...especially the part about being a refined lady and wanting to be treated just right.

(and damn if the mental image of Sasuke in full geisha regalia didn't have me struggling not to burst into a grin)

Still, I realized how _nice_ it was to hear him talk 'normally'; to not hear him sound condescending or superior. It was a reminder of how open he had been on the roof the night he spoke about his family, of how he had managed to sound self-deprecating with some of his anecdotes and unknowing sprinkles of dry humor within his stories. That was the Sasuke I wanted to hang out and be friends with...except for one little problem now.

_I **kissed** him._

Not on the lips...but damn well close enough...

_Oh hell..._

I closed my eyes and held my head again as if hoping this tactic would help release the tumultuous bubble welling within me.

My tongue and lips were still tingling with his taste.

(soft...smooth...)

That skin...it was that porcelain skin I had fallen for first, hadn't it? That in a bus full of grimy, stinky men, I had fallen for the 'girl' with the creamy skin that didn't look as if a stain could mar it in a million years. Perhaps my subconscious had all but pounced on the opportunity to finally savor it. Sasuke had opened the door with his innocent query (and man, how clueless had he looked when he asked about the "hickey"), and what had I done? Run right through with no questions asked; simply eager to satisfy that deep-seeded curiosity that had lingered with me after all this time.

What was the verdict?

Sweeter than anything I could have possibly imagined.

I swear his skin _really_ did taste that way...and maybe slightly salty with sweat, but _damn_! If he hadn't fallen, I might have literally sucked until I could taste his blood. I sure as hell _didn't_ want to stop, and he hadn't helped matters by rubbing against me like _that_ either. Didn't the guy have any idea how...well...guess _sensitive_ would be the word to use in this situation? Had he no clue how his moan and breathless sighs of pleasure was worth ten whores faking it in any red light district? At least the good thing in all of this was that my decision to become a monk would have to wait a little while. I think I still have the touch...wait...what?

Okay...calm down, Naruto...what happened was a mistake. Uchiha Sasuke is NOT a girl, goddamn it; no matter how many times you keep imagining him in a geisha outfit.

I slapped my cheeks - ignoring the pain that shot through me at this - and took a deep breath. What happened had happened. No taking that back. What mattered now was our relationship from here on out. We had both agreed to work with each other with as minimal arguments/disagreements as possible, and I was determined to keep my end of the bargain. There would be no more hickeys or attempts to even initiate a damn hickey next time, and if Sasuke dared try to repay the favor then...

Then...then...

(oh sweet God in heaven)

"...we'll just have to see what happens," I whispered with my heart stuck somewhere in my throat. "We're just going to have to wait and see."

* * *

><p><strong>Translations:<strong>

_Mot saeng gin eol hur _– Ugly face

_Hyung teo ga eol hur _– Scar face


	24. 24: Discerning Lines

**Notes:** Phew. It's been a very tiring week for yours truly. Being a home health nurse is no joke, people. So pardon my notes if they sound out of wonk. Just know that I am, as always, very, very appreciate of your comments (good or bad!) and look forward to reading and knowing what you think.

**P.S:** There seems to be a 'concern' at the notion of making Sasuke look 'weak' just because of the way he behaves at times. There is no crime in him looking or acting that way for it shows that he is _human_ and not the robot we were introduced to at the beginning of the story. Sasuke is growing emotionally and in a whole new direction. Does this mean he will automatically forget how to be a 'badass'? I don't think so. His badassery is only muted because his environment and lifestyle has _changed_. His feelings have _changed_ and he is forced to deal with them because they are new and rather alarming to all he's ever known. He _is_ naïve especially when it comes to matters of relationships, and if we can try to keep that in mind before writing him off as being too weak for daring to show his emotions, that would really help to make you understand him a little better. :)

Thanks again for your wonderful comments and feedback! *bows gratefully* Enjoy!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 24: <strong>

**Discerning Lines**

_Though the waterfall  
>Ceased its flowing long ago,<br>And its sound is stilled,  
>Yet, in name it ever flows,<br>And in fame may yet be heard._

_-Fujiwara no Kinto_

* * *

><p>If Haku noticed the new 'memento' his master was sporting, he wisely kept his opinions to himself. He was smart enough to know when his master was not in the mood to disclose any information that was of no concern to him, and considering he had barely gotten away with his 'boldness' yesterday, Haku was determined to curb his curiosity as best he could.<p>

Karin, however, was not so tactful.

"Is that a _hickey_?" was the first thing she screeched as she waltzed into their apartment with her tools-of-the-trade, and blessedly dressed in a pastel print kimono that didn't reveal too much of her cleavage or legs. You'd be amazed at how much of her wardrobe involved skimpy shorts or rather tight tees.

Though it was time for Sasuke's daily check up, and the men ought to be used to her random entrances (as she hadn't even bothered to knock..._again_), it was still jarring to the senses to have her in the same room. She could be quite imposing when she chose to be, and it was safe to say that after years of living in a female-free environment, they were still adjusting to her presence on a daily basis.

Sasuke – who had been trying to slip into a navy turtleneck sweater to hide the mark – cursed beneath his breath for not being fast enough as Karin fell to her knees and leaned closer to observe the now pinkish taint on his skin. Her brows were raised in undeniable curiosity.

"Oooh," she crowed. "Definitely looks like one."

"Stay away from me," came the low growl as Sasuke slapped his hand over the bruise and pushed her away with the other. He scowled as darkly as he could so she could get the point that he had absolutely no plans to answer her nosey query. Besides, his face felt so hot he was sure he was going to go up in flames in a second. Why couldn't she mind her damn business?

"What's a hickey?" Haku asked innocently, while pushing aside some of the furniture to make room for Sasuke-sama to work on the blueprints he had spoken of the night before.

Karin grinned and sat back. "It's a love bite," she explained as she tapped the side of her neck. Though she was talking to Haku, her gaze had not left the flushed man before her who had now managed to tug the turtleneck upwards to cover the glaring evidence. "It's when someone sucks really hard on your neck and -"

"Do you mind checking my leg now?" Sasuke interrupted curtly. It really was a miracle his voice was this composed especially at the description Karin had given and how his mind had gone racing right back to that moment when Naruto's lips had -

_Goddamn it! Stop. Thinking. About. That!_

Pity his night had been spent tossing and turning and reliving every damn second of it until he felt he'd go mad. He had to employ every ounce of self-control not to give in to the temptation of pleasuring himself and besides, it would have been hard to do such a thing without rousing his roommate. With Haku not questioning him (as he had feared), Sasuke had felt he could get away with coming up with a lie about it being a bite of some unknown insect. But now, with this loudmouth in the room -

"Oh, all right already, Mr. Grouchy Pants," Karin replied with a pout as she set to work; though her dark brown eyes still glinted with hidden mischief. "I was just kidding anyways..."

"Why would someone suck hard on Sasuke-sama's neck?" Haku was mumbling to himself, which had Karin's lips twitching into a helpless smile for Sasuke had given a little flinch (and it couldn't be from pain since she was still in the process of removing his bandages) in reaction. If anything, the man seemed to be redder than before.

_Curiouser and curiouser._

Just _where_ had he gotten the hickey from? Was there some girl he was seeing she was not aware of? She tried to squash down the sudden flare of jealousy within the pit of her stomach. So yeah, Sasuke had given her zilch in the form of positive sexual vibes, but it still didn't mean that she couldn't keep trying. It was going to be a slow process breaking him down, but she felt she was getting there. After all, she could take pleasure in knowing that he liked her cooking. He hadn't vomited or complained of constipation yet.

_Can't be another girl,_ she thought with a slight shake of her head. Most of the occupants in the building were of retirement age and at least one or two families with children below the age of ten. No one was allowed on their floor and besides...hadn't Shikamaru said Sasuke was looking after Naruto. She was sure he had not left the building at anytime after that. Where would he go without assistance anyway?

She glanced at Haku, who was now arranging the large white sheets of paper (they had purchased a few rolls while shopping the other day as per Itachi's instructions), pencils, pens, rulers and erasers, in neat piles. She pursed her lips in thought. Maybe Haku had done it last night and hadn't been aware of it. It wasn't unusual. After all, she could still remember the one time back in school, when she had fallen asleep beside Ino, and had woken up to find her jaw and neck dotted with the 'bites'. Poor Ino had apologized profusely, swearing she had only been dreaming of eating tons of strawberries and had no idea she was actually sucking on Karin's skin. When their commanding officer had queried about it, Karin lied; saying it was nothing more than mosquito bites. She was sure her officer had not bought the story. In fact, Karin wasn't sure if she bought Ino's story either. It wasn't as if Ino was into girls like that, but _damn_, did she really have to go about leaving hickeys all over her neck like she planned to eat her alive?

"Sometimes it happens on accident," she said aloud as she removed the final layer of bandages. They were rolled into a ball and tossed aside, and like clockwork, expert hands began to open up vials, bottles and packets that contained medications for the wound, which was healing nicely by the way. Besides the paler flesh, the stitches (thanks to Dr. Woo) were still intact and there was no sign of a blood clot or poor circulation. As she began to clean around the stitches, she continued to speak.

"Like when you're asleep and then you wake up to see someone licking your neck." She chuckled. "A friend of mine did that and she was apologetic afterwards. She could not believe she had done something like that. It was so unlike her..."

Her words trailed off as the chuckle faded into a sad smile. She bit her lower lip to control herself as it suddenly hit her that she would never get to see that face or hear that low-pitched laughter again. She would never hear that sweet voice humming or singing to herself when she felt no one was listening. She would never spend long hours over the phone or just hanging out talking about everything and nothing with Ino again.

No one in the world would have thought they would end up being the best of friends. Ino was the tall, leggy blonde that had all the guys falling at her feet, and she was the dork with the glasses and fire-engine-red hair who couldn't get rid of that blasted zit from her nose. Still, they had managed to bond somehow, and to this day, Karin would never know or understand what had made Ino decide to speak to her on that cold morning in the library.

_Maybe it's because we were always the ones with the highest grades in class and she figured she had something in common with me._

The illusion of being a dumb blonde was broken when it came to Ino. She had definitely been a rival when it came to getting good grades and the highest scores during clinicals and battle-medic simulations. If Karin was fast, then Ino was probably a step faster. How could anyone forget how swift she had taken care of a below-the-knee amputee during a battle simulation? Not only had she stopped the bleeding, the bandaging of the stump had been executed to perfection. Karin would have no time to be jealous, but rather filled with reluctant admiration. Hell, if it wasn't for Ino's assistance sometimes, Karin was sure she would not have passed a few of those tests or exams.

"...would have been a great doctor," she muttered to herself, only to be horrified as something hot and wet splashed against her hand and fell upon Sasuke's leg.

_Wha...what? What am I doing?_

Sasuke – who had been lost in his own thoughts as well – noticed (or rather felt it) and raised a brow in bemusement.

"Sor...sorry," she stuttered with a laugh that felt too forced. She wiped away the wet dots on his skin, and took off her glasses to scrub her face clean. She closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and when she felt she was in control again...

(first rule of being a medic; do not show your emotions on the battlefield. Be professional!)

...she lifted her lashes and slipped the goggles on again. "My apologies," she said brightly. "I was just…"

"Hickeys make you cry?" Sasuke asked quietly, and as she looked up to chide him playfully for his seemingly stupid question, she noticed the dark and knowing look in his eyes. Her heart tightened with an emotion so strong, she could barely breathe. He _knew_, didn't he? He knew she wasn't just thinking about dumb hickeys. He knew that this was more than just a bite on the neck. After all, he had been with Ino, hadn't he? Was it really a surprise that he could tell that she had been talking about her now dead friend?

She opened her mouth to say "no" and to deny everything, but to her chagrin, nothing but an unladylike harsh sob burst from her lips –

(how unprofessional, Karin! If your commanding officer could see you now, you'd be docked major points!)

...and still the damn tears wouldn't stop. She realized that she had not really allowed herself to mourn Ino's loss. Being a member of Akatsuki meant having to deal with death every other day as members were prone to give up their lives for the cause. After a while, the body and mind tend to become numb to such news, and perhaps the same thing had happened after Sasuke recounted the horrific way Ino had died at the hands of those bastards. Sure she had cried then, but it had felt more of an automated response – a sudden shock to the senses. It almost didn't seem real.

So why now? Why would the very memory of seeing a hickey, or recalling Ino's embarrassed features as she whispered to Karin not to tell anyone about it ever, ever, ever! Want to make her sob her damn heart out?

_It's because I lost my best and only friend. She was the only one who saw the real me and...and..._

"Ooomph!"

Her eyes widened in shock at what was happening, and it took almost a full minute for her confused mind to realize that she was suddenly inhaling the heady, male scent of Sasuke...could hear his steady heartbeat (_badumpbadumpbadump_) against the soft fabric of his sweater...could feel his strong arm around her shoulders...and...and...

(oh my God! He's hugging me! He's actually...**hugging** me!)

...with a louder sob, she gave up the fight and burrowed her face against his silent offer of compassion; finally letting it all out as she should have done so many nights before.

Haku, realizing this was a private moment between his master and the young lady, gave a light nod of understanding. He rose to his feet and left the room with barely a sound, only to expel a breath as he closed the door behind him carefully and was in the safety of the quiet hallway.

Poor Karin-chan. She was so nice (a bit scary at times with her over enthusiasm especially when she kept borrowing Haku for her makeover 'experiments'), but it was obvious that she was still sad over losing her best friend. Haku sighed and stooped to his haunches. He wrapped his arms around his knees, and wondered how he would feel if he lost any of his new friends.

Would he be as devastated as he had been when he heard the news of Zabuza-san's death? Back then, his only chance to grieve was in the darkest hours of the night and away from Sasuke-sama who would have frowned upon any outward showing of such weak emotions. In those lonesome minutes, he had relieved every moment spent with Zabuza; wondering how his life could have been if the brash officer had kept his promise and rescued him before Sasuke-sama did.

_How would I feel if Sasuke-sama...di...di...died?_

He shuddered at the thought and squeezed his eyes shut; already feeling his chest hitch in a breath at the notion of losing his master. Haku figured he'd rather die first than be the one burying Sasuke-sama, which was why this upcoming battle...their return to Byaku-Shinkyou _had_ to be a success. He would never leave Sasuke-sama's side that's for sure -

"Haku? That you?"

He looked up with a start, only to break into a warm smile as he noticed Naruto sauntering out of the bathroom. The evidence of his bath was in the cloud of steam flickering like ghostly fingers as the door swung shut behind him, the plaster of his wet blond locks upon his scalp, forehead and cheeks, and the rosy freshly-scrubbed hue on his flesh. Though the left side of Naruto-kun's face was still recovering from 'the fall' (at least the swelling had gone down and he could see again), there was something about seeing the older boy smiling – actually giving a _genuine_ smile – that sent a flutter of something warm within Haku's heart. He could feel his cheeks burning at the brief but embarrassing image that flickered through his mind and kicked himself mentally for even thinking of something like that.

_Besides, he's made it more than obvious he would never be interested in pursuing 'that side' of things._

Either way, where was the harm in fantasizing about a non-possibility? Naruto-kun could be self-deprecating when it came to his looks as he had bemoaned and whined about girls not appreciating his 'masculine' beauty. Haku didn't understand it either. He wouldn't go as far as saying that Naruto was strikingly handsome, but he was far from ugly as well. His face was full of character and had a story to tell. Perhaps it was the mysterious scars on his cheeks or those piercing blue eyes that seemed to sear through your soul if you stared into them long enough. Whatever it was, Haku had found himself unable to look away from that face the moment he had laid eyes on it. Why else would he find himself stopping to talk to Naruto for no damn reason?

_I was compelled...attracted to his aura. He has no idea how much charisma he has; how his very presence in a room can make the whole place light up even if he isn't in the best of moods. And when he smiles..._

It seemed as if the whole world smiled along with him. It was just that contagious.

"Good morning, Naruto-kun," he greeted as he rose to his feet and all but ran towards the taller man. "You are looking much better today."

Naruto grinned and reached out to tug Haku's ponytail playfully. "I'm all right. Thanks again for sending over the soup." He placed his fingers to his lips and kissed them. "Delicious as always, maestro."

Haku giggled and blushed at the compliment. "You're welcome. Anytime at all." He peered over his shoulder. "Where's Shikamaru-san?"

"Still marinating in the tub," Naruto replied as he opened the door to their apartment. "What about you? What were you doing out there hunched over like that? Got a tummy ache?"

Haku shook his head and walked ahead of the blond. He sat on the floor and searched for the remote control to the television. "No, I had to leave because Sasuke-sama and Karin-chan needed to be alone."

Something clattered loudly behind him, and he turned to notice Naruto cursing beneath his breath and picking up the hardcover book that had fallen on his foot. Naruto all but chucked the offending object back into the shelf and took a deep breath to gather himself. He wasn't sure what he was more concerned or worried about. Karin hooking up with Sasuke (after failing to get her attention all this time) or Sasuke hooking up with Karin (after...whatever...meh, didn't matter anyway).

"Are you okay, Naruto-kun?"

"I'm fine," he muttered and half-limped to the closet to find something to wear. "Why do they need to be alone?" he asked as nonchalantly as he could manage. Haku had settled onto a show to watch; a horror movie it looked like and a cheesy one at that.

"Karin-chan was crying about something," Haku explained. "I'm not sure why, but she was saying something about Sasuke-sama having a hi...hickey?" His brows creased in confusion. He failed to see the rush of color that filled Naruto's face at this revelation. "And she started talking about a 'she', so I guessed she was remembering her friend that she lost. So Sasuke-sama is comforting her."

"Ah..."

Figured. They both had the dead girl in common, so it shouldn't have been that surprising to see them bonding over something like that. Still, it was a relief that a past memory had distracted Karin from digging more into the whole hickey incident...unlike the bizarre conversation he had with Shikamaru in the bathroom. He should have known something was up with the way his buddy had been acting weird all last night and early this morning. Well...maybe not weird per se, but more like giving him strange looks as if trying to make up his mind about something. Finally having enough of the odd behavior, Naruto had all but snapped impatiently as Shika began scrubbing his hair.

"All right, spit it out. What's the matter with you?"

Innocently befuddled at the sudden query, Shikamaru had looked up with a raised brow. "Huh?"

"Don't 'huh' me," Naruto retorted with a pointed finger. "You've been looking at me kinda funny since yesterday. What gives? What did I do?"

Shikamaru made a sound that was between a sigh and a chortle. He rinsed off and decided it was no longer feasible to keep his curiosity in check. He spun around on his stool to completely face his indignant companion, and being careful with his words, he said slowly:

"I saw what happened yesterday."

Naruto blinked. What was he talking about? He saw what? The fight on the roof? That was impossible. Shika had been dead to the world when he decided to take his midnight trip. Then what could he mean by...?

Oh. Wait a minute…he probably saw…

_...shit._

He straightened up, though he could feel his cheeks burning, and forced himself to stare back into the intense dark eyes before him.

_Act cool. Act cool. Act cool._

"Yeah? So?"

"Wanna tell me what exactly was going on?"

"And if I told you it's none of your damn business?"

Shikamaru quirked a brow. "Come on, Naruto. You've gotta admit that's a little...I mean...just what the hell were you doing to him? I thought you were biting him to death or -"

Naruto flushed. "I was not _biting_ him, goddamn it. He didn't know what a hickey was, so I showed him. That's all there is to it. What's the big deal?"

The big deal was he still hadn't been able to get that episode out of his mind; no matter how much he tried to distract himself for the rest of the day. He could _still taste_ that damn bastard on his tongue even now...and he had brushed his teeth twice already!

"Showing him a hickey?" Shikamaru repeated incredulously. "Wow...and just a day ago, it looked like you two were about to kill each other. How the fuck did the conversation become about hickeys?"

"It was a demonstration," Naruto grated slowly perhaps hoping it would somehow sink into Shikamaru's skull. "It's not as if we're gonna be doing that again."

"I should hope not. That was just fucking...weird, man."

Naruto burned and felt the overwhelming urge to tell Shikamaru to go fuck himself. Except...Shikamaru's reaction wasn't all too far from how he would have reacted if he had caught his friend in the same situation.

It _was_ weird. There was nothing 'natural' about giving another _guy_ a hickey especially someone you weren't supposed to like in the first place. In retrospect, he could see how it would creep Shika out. Still, they had decided to work together and maintain a civil relationship, so Shikamaru would just have to suck it up and deal with it... like Naruto was planning to.

"...like he was enjoying it..." came the low mumble.

"What? What did you say?"

Shikamaru smirked. "Nothing...just that I said it looked like he was enjoying it. Hey," he raised his hands as Naruto scowled. "I'm just saying what I noticed, that's all."

"Just how long did you watch, you pervert?"

Shikamaru laughed and reached for the bottle of body wash. "Long enough. Good thing I got there in time or Haku might have been the one opening the door. Could you imagine his reaction?"

Naruto definitely could. Haku would probably scream and assume they were in a fight again; only he might have the wrong assumption like Shikamaru and think he was biting Sasuke to death too.

_Might have ended up with a fucking throwing knife in my back or stomach._

But then again, Haku had admitted he _liked_ to be with men, so would he have found the situation that strange, or would he have accepted it if it was explained to him?

As he slid a tee-shirt over his head, he pursed his lips in thought and glanced at the boy engrossed with the shenanigans on the screen. Again, he was struck by how feminine and pretty (nah, downright beautiful) Haku was. Maybe it was the hair, which always looked so clean and neatly combed (and smelled nice too), or those deep set brown eyes that could look at you soulfully or deadly depending on his mood. Or maybe it was his shy smile and girlish giggle, or the way his cheeks would flare up with twin hues of pink when embarrassed or pleased about something. Or maybe it was how smooth and pale – not quite as porcelain as his master's, but close enough – that skin was, or the fact that he liked to dress in kimonos. Whatever it was, Naruto could see why guys would be attracted to him, although he had to wonder if many of said guys had freaked out at the notion that they were crushing hard on a fellow male. All the same, he wondered how life had really been for Haku in Byaku-Shinkyou. The servant had never really talked much about his past, except for the vague statement of owing his freedom or life to Sasuke for some unknown reason.

_If I ask him about his life, he's naturally going to want to know about mine,_ he thought with a light frown as he began pulling out the rolls of paper and drawing materials Karin purchased the other day. _Am I really ready to share everything with another person? _

Besides Shikamaru...and well Itachi and Shisui who had been nosey in the first place...Naruto really wasn't prone to talking about himself that easily. He hadn't even been able to share anything much about his life with Sasuke the other night. He seemed more content to absorb other lives and indulge in fantasies of having lived through them as well. No one would really care about his boring back story.

"...uto-kun?"

He all but jumped out of his skin at how close Haku's voice was; spinning around quickly with widened eyes to notice the bemused teen staring right back at him. "Wha...what is it?" he asked breathlessly. Geez. The guy moved so silently, it was damn eerie.

"You've been standing in the corner with those things for a few minutes now," Haku replied with a tentative smile. "Do you need any help? Are you going to work on the blueprints now?"

"Yeah...I figured I could get started on it. Shika's gonna help me since he knows a little more about the area. But...I think we should just wait for him to get out of the bath and then we head over to your apartment so we know exactly what the hell we're doing. Don't want us all working on the same locations, eh?"

Haku nodded and his smile seemed a bit more relived as he helped Naruto gather his supplies. Shikamaru showed up a few minutes later, and as they waited for him to get ready, Naruto gnawed absently on the tip of an unsharpened pencil in thought. He kept telling himself that the sudden burst of fluttering butterflies filling his stomach had absolutely nothing to do with the idea of being in the same room or seeing that guy again.

For as Shikamaru had so succinctly put it...it was all just so very..._weird_.

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke: <em>

Ask me why I made the decision to hug her, and I will never be able to give you a proper answer. Comforting anyone has never been a part of my repertoire, but then again, so many damn things have never been in my repertoire since I stepped out of the gates of Byaku-Shinkyou. All the same, I wouldn't lie and say it wasn't nice to feel her warmth against mine for it brought back the poignant memories of being in Ino's arms the morning after our passionate encounter. I think it only made me realize just how much I had missed (or craved) such intimate contact with another human especially when it was reciprocated.

She – and I mean Karin – might not be as curvaceous as Ino was, but there was no mistaking the swell of her bosoms against my chest or how her thighs rubbed gently against mine – no thanks to the awkward angle of half-sitting/lying on me. I bit back a groan as she stirred (on purpose?) and rotated her hips a little. I am only human and my body's natural reaction to this position had me trying to adjust myself as discreetly as possible.

_I really wish she'd get off me. _

At least she had stopped crying – which was good - but she was still making no attempt to pull away from me. The situation only got worse when she began talking quietly about the girl she had once known.

Patiently I listened, and the more I heard, the more… _human_ Ino became to me. All this time, and even in her death, a part of me had regarded her as something ethereal and not really of this world. Perhaps it was a mesh of the heights of passion she had taken me coupled with how she had looked against the glow of the lanterns in that room. Either way, hearing Karin's stories – of Ino's flaws, trials and tribulations - solidified her existence in my mind. She was no longer just 'the-woman-I-lost-my-virginity-to', but she was a woman who had a world beyond the doors of that bedroom. Ino had been smart, funny, but could be quite talkative when she chose to be. My one major regret was never getting to know more about that side of her.

Or perhaps I would have if that 'date' had ever taken place.

I sighed; unaware I was absently caressing Karin's hair as my mind drifted back to that dreadful day and that damning letter.

_All just one big fucking set up and I fell for it; hook, line and sinker. What a fool I was._

The bitterness and loathing for Orochimaru, that had somewhat diminished since our arrival here, was slowly rising to the surface again. I could almost taste the bile in my throat and wanted nothing more than to -

"Sasuke?"

"Hmm?" I shook myself a little to get back to the present.

"Did you…when you were with Ino…did you fall in love with her?" came the unexpected and quiet question that had me blinking in surprise.

_Fall in love with her_? I had just known her for barely two days…and even at that, did people fall in love after having such sexual encounters? Was that a requirement of some sort?

"I think she fell in love with you first," Karin continued without giving me a chance to formulate a coherent reply. She gave a smile that was wistful yet slightly bitter. "When we were reviewing the notes and plans for Orochimaru's assassination, we were given a dossier of information and it included your most recent photograph sent by Asuma-san. That night, Ino told me she was going to volunteer to be a spy at the inn you'd be staying at though I had wanted the job in the first place. Lucky me, huh?"

She bit her lower lip as if ashamed of admitting her bout of jealousy at her friend's good fortune or bad…depending on how you looked at it. "Though she had sounded like she was joking, she said she was definitely going to make you fall for her. It was like she was a mind reader – in addition to all the other cool things she could do – and just taking one look at your picture; she said she was sure you had a good heart."

I resisted the urge to snort in derision, but held it in; though inexplicable warmth did fill my chest at Ino's judgment of my character. Considering we had not yet met, and she was simply going by my photograph, I wondered if she had heard of my terrible reputation of being unforgiving and cruel to condemned sinners. Maybe she wouldn't have thought so highly of me then.

"…and I believe her…"

"What?" I asked in confusion. I had almost forgotten Karin was still talking.

She lifted her head to look at me; her bright brown eyes – they looked almost red if the light struck it at a particular angle – filled with an emotion that made me slightly uncomfortable. I could feel her body pressing closer to mine, and it triggered off a wave of heat I could not control even if I wanted to. She was getting too damn close and it was easy to see that our proximity was affecting her as well. It was in the slight flare of her nostrils, the teasing dart of her tongue to lick her moist lips, the dilation of her pupils, and worse…the sensation of her fingernails tracing my forearms before squeezing them gently. Her flowery perfume was a tantalizing tease to my senses, and I really did feel as if inhaling it any longer was bound to have me hypnotized or drunk on its scent.

"You do have a good heart, Uchiha Sasuke," she explained in a breathy whisper. "I know you had a difficult job being an officer and having to condemn criminals, but you were only doing your job, weren't you? Deep down inside, I know you're a man with a heart of gold."

"You're mistaken," I growled beneath my breath_. I am far from what you think I really am._

"No, I'm not." She smiled and dared to place a feather-light kiss at the corner of my lips. I was too frozen by her audacity to push her off. "I saw the kind and gentle side of you when we went to the temple the other day. You have deep rooted beliefs in something higher than yourself, and your humility before that higher being was beautiful to see. You _can_ be humble, Sasuke, and that is just one of the many things that makes you so…(kiss)…very…(kiss)…sexy…(kiss)…"

"Wait…what…Karin…mmpffh!"

The sudden hard yet soft sensation of her lips against mine just as we fell back to the floor in a tangle of limbs, unfortunately coincided with the door opening and a happy greeting from Haku faltering short as he took in the scene before him.

_Damn it!_

I struggled to sit up, though Karin was already doing the same (thank God!) and trying to adjust her kimono which had ridden up a little higher over her thighs and the sleeves which had fallen just a little lower to reveal the top of her bosoms. As I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand; ignoring Haku's profuse apologies for barging in since he did knock and no one answered – my gaze drifted to the two silent figures standing behind my flustered manservant.

_Fuck!_ Why the hell did they have to be here?

My stomach felt like a block of ice as I met those familiar blue eyes, but just as quickly, a tremendous rush of heat (akin to being doused in fire) flared right through me at the inscrutable expression on his visage. I bit my lower lip and turned away.

_God help me. Just what is he thinking? _

And why should I care what he thinks by the way? It's not as if I owe him an explanation for whatever I choose to do (or not do) with Karin.

"Sorry for barging in," Shikamaru was saying. "We did knock..."

"No, no, no, it's my fault," Karin stuttered with a weak laugh as she _finally_ finished up with my dressing and shoved the painkillers into my hands. She looked flustered and in disarray; no doubt feeding the wrong impression to our guests. "I was done here anyway. I won't stay too long…I mean remain in your way. I know you boys have a lot of work to do. So…"

She rose to her feet unsteadily, and with a final bow of apology to all of us, she all but ran out of the room with a loud slam of the door behind her.

_Great. Now what?_

A tense, awkward silence fell for almost a full minute, before Naruto cleared his throat and pointed toward the area Haku had set up for us.

"We working there?" he asked, and I found myself annoyed at how casual and nonchalant he sounded. What was I expecting? Did I want him to be more confrontational about what he had just witnessed? Or at least to sound a little jealous?

_Dream on, Uchiha Sasuke. If you think what happened yesterday was the prelude to anything else…you are mistaken. To him it was nothing more than a demonstration after all. I had asked, he delivered...that's all there is to it. He must have probably been laughing behind my back while he was in the bathroom. _

"Uum...Sasuke?"

"Yes," I found myself responding, and though I could hear the slight tremble in my voice, I was glad to see that I didn't sound as breathless (disappointed) as I felt inside.

Pretending to sharpen the pencils, I watched as Naruto and Shikamaru made their way to the opposite side of the room and set up their materials. It was good to see that the swelling was down at least, and he could see from both eyes now. The cheek was still slightly puffy, but the band aid Karin had applied yesterday was still in place. It would take me another embarrassing second to realize I was actually staring right into those damn eyes for they too were studying me in silence. It was difficult to read what was behind them, and I yearned to strain my 'inner vision' to peer into his thoughts. However, he was distracted by a question from Shikamaru, and I was allowed to breathe again as he turned away to answer.

_Why the hell do I feel like I've done something wrong?_

"All right," I said aloud when I was sure I was in command of all my faculties. I kept my focus on the sheet of notepaper before me and began to write. "Since Haku and I are more familiar with the administrative buildings and officers' quarters as well as most of the underground labyrinths, we'll work on that. I say 'most' because even as we are here, Orochimaru might still be building more hideouts."

"Fucking psycho," came the low mutter from Naruto that had my lips twitching in a reluctant smile. Psycho, huh? That was putting it mildly.

"Actually, Byaku-Shinkyou already had a few underground lairs," I admitted as I absently doodled a rectangular block and began to divide them into sections from memory. "They were designed as either meeting rooms or bunkers to protect the clan during times of war. Unfortunately, Orochimaru discovered some of them and decided to renovate the whole thing."

I scratched out some sections as I felt the familiar wave of helpless anger overwhelm me. I only had to close my eyes and I would be taken back to the day when we had stood – miles beneath the earth – in a cavern that had once held many historical artifacts of my ancestors. Orochimaru had taken one look at them, shook his head and muttered something about it becoming his new library. I must have been eight or nine, and had absolutely no say in what he did at the time. I could only watch in horrified silence as he tore down pieces of my family's history to be replaced with dungeons and purification sites that made no sense to me.

"We never had dungeons for sinners…or torture chambers…all of that was added by Orochimaru after he took over. I haven't actually been to the East Block a lot," I confessed; finally lifting my gaze to the men across me. They were watching me with unreadable expressions, and I felt a chill go down my spine as I realized just how precarious a position I was in. Reminding them about their stay at Byaku-Shinkyou could be triggering dark memories of the pain and suffering they went through –

(especially Naruto)

…and nothing could stop them from getting up and killing me right here and now as retribution. Though I knew I could hold my own in battle, wouldn't it still be poetic justice for them to take their revenge out on me now?

"You've been around the East Block, eh, Shika?" Naruto finally asked as he tore his gaze from me to nudge his partner gently. His voice was still even – as if they were simply discussing the weather and not a place where he had been tortured to the brink of death.

"Yeah," Shikamaru agreed quietly. He too was doodling on a piece of paper. "To deliver messages and the such. I think there are ten levels in all." He drew out a rough cone/cylindrical shape and what appeared to be steps winding around it. "Each level has about ten dungeons; the first has the main office and officers slash guards rooms and the lowest is where the main torture chambers are." He paused and glanced at Naruto as if unsure of how to continue, but he must have seen something in the blond's eyes for he gave a barely noticeable nod before speaking again. "I've only been there once, so I can't be too sure if things have changed since then. I do know there's the room where Naruto was taken to here…" He drew a large X on a section of the cone. "And at the other side were two more rooms that I'm not sure of what they contain." He shrugged and gave me a wan smile. "Now, the West Block, I'm more familiar with."

I nodded in agreement. It was the busiest since it was where all sinners were 'docked' from the buses before separated to their various cells. It was also the gateway to 'The Pit' and the arena where Gudan took place.

"I'll leave the West Block to you and Naruto to map out," I offered. "Especially you, Shikamaru since you were quite a trusted messenger of the officers if I'm not mistaken."

He gave me a mock salute and that same smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. "Yeah. That's me."

Why do I get the feeling that this guy will never like me for as long as I live? His body language positively screamed "I am only tolerating you" though he was still cordial with me. Not that I give a shit. If I could live most of my life with officers who simply 'tolerated' me, why would dealing with Shikamaru's attitude bother me?

"Naruto…" I began.

"Aye aye, captain." Like Shikamaru, he gave me a mock salute and smiled. I wasn't sure if it was another one of his forced smiles, since there was really nothing funny about making him recall his stay at my 'home' for nearly six months.

"Where are you most familiar with…aside from the dungeons," I added quickly in case he made a wise ass comment about that.

"The prisoners' quarters, kitchens, dining area, laundry…all the way to the dojo area." The big grin was gone, and in its place a cold smile that had me clutching the pencil a little tighter in my grip. It was a smile that spoke volumes, for the day I had collided with him hadn't been an 'innocent mistake' after all. The smart bastard had been doing his homework…scouting the territory all under the ruse of being lost. I had to give it to him.

"I see," I mumbled. "Then I'll allow you to handle that side of things." I took a deep breath and turned to Haku, who looked at me with a smile that eased the tension I was feeling inside. "Haku and I – as I mentioned earlier- will work on areas including the entrance, temples, offices, and private quarters. Any questions?"

There was none forthcoming, and with a final instruction on comparing 'notes' when we were done for at least today, we set to work. In about half-an-hour though, I had to move to the desk to continue as my leg began to throb from my awkward position on the floor. It was a good thing too, as it prevented me from having to keep looking up to see Naruto and Shikamaru working too damn close to each other. Every now and then, their heads would meet as they muttered beneath their breaths and compared their outlines – sometimes bursting into soft laughter or chuckles as they shared a joke between them.

_I feel like an outsider. _

And why shouldn't it be that way? From the start, I was never a part of them anyway. I had been a high-ranking official in a (technically) government position. I was a part of the law (Orochimaru's law) that had frowned upon and punished them for crimes they had committed. I had lived in a bubble where I failed to see them as humans and simply treated them as nothing more than statistics and the embodiment of their sins. I was the perfect product of Orochimaru's teachings, where the very notion of knowing the sinners on a personal level had been frowned upon. I based my judgments on a belief system that was nothing more than the delusions and grandiosity of a deranged power-hungry psychopath. I had executed men and condemned others to their death so many times over, the ritual numbed the little humanity I could have spared for their wretched lives.

And oh, how the tables have turned.

I could walk down the streets now, and no one would recognize who I was, or fall in fear of my very presence. I was no longer living in relative luxury, but stuck in a cramped apartment high above the streets in a foreign land. And the most ironic of all? I was now living with the remnants of my prejudice in a lifestyle that would have put my parents and ancestors to shame.

I stared blindly at the outline of what was supposed to be the entrance to my home. On paper, it was nothing more than lines and blocks and my hastily scribbled notes; but in my mind, I could still see those enormous grand gates, which required a special mechanism to open. I could see the lengthy stone paved walkway leading to the intimidating yet breathtaking twin pillars which ushered you to the majestic temple of worship.

Something hard filled my throat and I struggled to swallow it down and fight back the mist that was blurring my vision. How pathetic to show such emotion over mere lines and blocks, but there was no denying it.

_I was homesick. _

I _wanted_ to go back to my childhood home. I wanted to walk along those gardens in the blissful mist of dawn or the purple hues of dusk. I wanted to sit in my living room, reading my favorite books, listening to Haku play his _shamisen_ while the mountains and lakes remained silent and sturdy in the horizon. I wanted to wade and sink my aching body within the warm, healing waters of my private _onsen_. I wanted to return to the dojo, where my dear students would be awaiting with smiles and an eagerness to learn a new skill. I wanted to see Asuma, to hear that loud laughter, to suffer through his cheesy jokes, and to know that he'd always be there (no matter how terrible I treated him) whenever I needed him.

_No more...never again..._

I bit my lower lip hard enough to draw blood and discreetly wiped the corner of my eye. Taking a deep breath, I forced myself to focus on the rest of the drawing. Realizing that this was only fate or karma after all. For all my sins in the past, I was slowly but surely paying for them now.

_The happiness and suffering of all beings_

_Are due to karma, the Sage taught;_

_Karma arises from diverse acts,_

_Which in turn create the diverse classes of beings..._

As I mulled over what this text – which suddenly came to mind – ought to mean in the grand scheme of things, a loud yawn and sudden announcement of "break time!" had me looking up with a start. I glanced at the alarm clock and was surprised to see that we had been at it for nearly three hours so far.

"May we go for a break, captain? I am staaaaarving," Naruto whined, while pretending to faint over his sketches. This earned a giggle from Haku and a snort from Shikamaru. I gritted my teeth; aware he was deliberately goading me with that title, but instead of indulging his deliberate jibe, I nodded and waved for them to be excused.

"That's fine with me," I replied, while turning back to my drawing. "Do whatever you want."

They couldn't leave fast enough it seemed, though I was sure I heard Naruto mutter something like 'self-righteous prick' beneath his breath. Or maybe I was just so used to him insulting me, I assumed I must have heard it. I waited until the door was closed before expelling a breath and turning around to look at the chaos behind me. And what organized chaos too.

Haku, who was now in the kitchen preparing something edible, had been working on a section of the officers' quarters and he was doing a rather good job with his basic sketches. Shikamaru's blueprints (he had finished with two already it seemed) had him currently working on the West Block, and I was quite surprised to see just how many more hidden sections I had been unaware of! Goddamn that sly bastard Orochimaru! However, the most startling of all was Naruto's efforts.

_Wow. Fucking...wow..._

I had assumed his work would be haphazard and incomprehensible, but as I lifted the papers to examine them thoroughly, it was clear that this man had missed his calling in life. For all his appearance and behavior as a first-class dolt, Naruto's sketches clearly showed that he was quite observant even to the minutest of details. His lines were neat and dimensions precise. He had left no nook and cranny unturned; not even a single window or doorway out of place. Hell, even the blind would be able to find their way easily, if this was given to them as a map. It was just that _impressive_. He was focusing on the kitchens and its surroundings which included the officers' dining area and the laundry, and though I had lived in Byaku-Shinkyou all of my life...seeing Naruto's drawing made it seem like a completely new world to me. It was almost unrecognizable and a jarring reminder that, for all my supposed knowledge and power, I hardly knew my own home anymore.

No wonder Itachi wanted this done. Even he would be alarmed at just how much has changed over the years.

After lunch I contemplated complimenting Naruto on his skills, but for some reason, the words remained lodged in my throat. If he noticed that anything was out of place (though I had made sure I kept the papers back as I had seen them), he said nothing, but simply went back to work with a concentration that was fascinating to watch...

...and I would have probably gone on watching if it wasn't for Haku nudging me to ask a question that reminded me of having some work to do myself. Still...it was hard to get rid of that image of his tongue sticking out of the corner of his mouth as he erased a mistake with vigor. As if on cue, the 'bite' on my neck seemed to burn, and I absently reached up to caress it.

God help me, but...

I _wanted_ that tongue on my skin again. No use denying that now. Unfortunately, I knew it was going to take another major 'accident' of some sort to ever get that sort of a scenario to happen again. So I might as well pray for pigs to start flying.

We stopped working sometime around nine in the evening, where we called it a night and agreed to return the next day to continue. It wasn't until much later, while laying on my futon and staring blindly at the ceiling, would it dawn on me that besides his seeking permission for lunch and the instructions I gave when we started, Naruto and I had barely spoken to each other.

It was as if everything that had transpired yesterday had taken place in another dimension, as if his offer of civility was nothing more than a mask to hide his still obvious wariness and caution about me. What kind of a game was he playing? What kind of a game were _we _playing? Did he want me to make the first move? But hadn't I...indirectly with my monologue? Hadn't I shared my childhood with him? What else did he want from me? Why did I have to do all the work when he has barely shared anything about himself with me?

I sighed in frustration and forced myself to get some sleep, but not before making a promise to do as much as I could to keep up with this so-called 'civility' between us.

...even if my heart seemed to seek (scream) for something so much more.

* * *

><p><em>Naruto:<em>

We had completely forgotten about Dr. Woo's appointment, that morning, until Karin just about hyperventilated in an attempt to get us to hurry up, get dressed and head down to the waiting van.

Any excuse to leave that apartment building was a good one, and even more so recently, no thanks to having to work on those damn blueprints for the past three days.

I really had no idea how much it would affect me, because it was turning out to be more mentally draining than I had imagined. It was like being thrust back into that place and being made to relive every damn moment where I felt death would take me away in the next hour or minute. I was glad I wasn't working on the dungeons, but it didn't matter anyway. Just drawing the abandoned shed where I spent my lunch breaks, spurred several visceral reactions from me. At times, I could literally feel my toes getting numb at the memory of the biting cold as I trudged through two to three inches of snow in socks with holes in them. I would shiver as my snow-dampened yukata would cling to my skin; a skin where bruises still struggled to heal and every nip of winter's bitter kiss would make my bones stiffen like that of an old man's. I was still suffering from the effects of it, especially on nights when I slept in an awkward position.

As I would draw another line to signify the demarcation between the cellar and the storage room, I recalled my early days in the kitchens when I would shamelessly lick the remnant soups or stews left in the officers' plates, or hungrily wolf down leftovers and scraps meant for the garbage just to sustain myself for the next few grueling hours of work. Memories of stumbling – dead on my feet – to my little 'closet' with its thin insect-ridden mattress and thinner blanket for barely three hours of restless sleep before rudely awakened by the sounds of the early morning bell signaling another new day of the same redundant routine – plagued my dreams and left me waking up with a stifled scream and drenched in sweat. There were bags beneath my eyes now, and if Shikamaru...or any of the others noticed it, they said nothing. In fact, it was safe to say that this whole process was taking a toll on us in different ways.

On that first day, I could have sworn I had noticed Sasuke crying...or at least looking as if he wanted to cry (or maybe there was just something stuck in his eye), and I couldn't really blame him. That place had been his home after all, but it was ironic that while it probably brought him happy memories of his childhood, it brought nothing but pain and suffering to me. While I hated the place, he loved it with his whole heart despite the darkness that plagued it.

"Whoo, you look like death wormed over," Woo remarked when it was finally my turn to step into his office. "What's wrong? The shoulder bothering you again? Though from your x-rays, it looks like it's practically healed."

I shook my head and gave him a weak smile. "Just tired I guess. We've been working hard on an assignment from Itachi."

"Ah...the blueprints," Woo said with a solemn nod of understanding. "Sasuke informed me about that. He is just as exhausted, so I recommend you boys all take a break and try to relax for a few days. Get your muscles moving again, eh?"

"Is it all right?" I asked as I flexed my arm.

"I don't see why not especially if you take it easy with the exercises I'm going to recommend to you. You need to build up your strength, so consider this phase one of your physical therapy, all right?"

"Gotcha!"

I was given an exercise band and two small dumbbells. With the dressings no longer needed, I was to perform a set of exercises five days a week, twice a day. Fifteen repetitions of each exercise for the first three days and then progressing to two sets of fifteen repetitions. After ten days of this, I was to 'upgrade' to three sets of fifteen repetitions. Brutal schedule, but doable. I had to get them strong anyway. If I was to start practicing with my Glock, the last thing I needed was for the recoil to disable my shoulders again.

I would later learn that Sasuke's exercises were a little 'easier' and I say easier because it pretty much involved him mostly sitting on a chair and trying to stretch out both legs and lift them often...or lying on his stomach or back and have someone help lift his legs and stretch them. However, I've seen the guy sweat just walking up and down a flight of stairs, and I was sure it was going to be just as brutal for him to get through his routine without wanting to kill someone when it was done. At least he'd have Haku or Karin as punching bags; though I doubt it will happen especially with his budding relationship with the girl.

_...damn._

Just what I didn't need to think about. I still can't get that irritating image of those two, sucking face, out of my mind. Should I have been surprised though that they'd eventually hook up? I mean...right from the beginning it was clear she had eyes for him anyway.

_Sigh._

I rubbed my eyes and struggled to focus on the drawing before me. We were back in Sasuke's apartment, and though I was tired and wanted nothing more than to hit the sack, I was determined to finish up this particular section so I could get to work on the prisoners' quarters. Haku and Karin had gone to get some shopping done, so it was only Shika and Sasuke keeping me company. Sasuke was in his usual position at his desk, which gave one a good view of his back as he leaned over his work. You've got to admire the guy's work ethic if nothing else. He can remain in one position for three to four hours straight – not even stopping to get a drink, or scratch or yawn – just focused on what he's doing. Let's not mention that he's not that bad at drawing either. I thought my stuff was okay, but he was pretty detailed with his blueprints and it was impressive to see the world beneath Byaku-Shinkyou (well besides the dungeons). Who knew there was literally a whole other city beneath the place? The Uchihas, as well as Snake Dude, were mad geniuses that's for sure.

A sudden knock at the door broke through the thick lull that had fallen over us. For a second, neither of us moved because we were sure it wasn't Karin or Haku. They had left for barely half-an-hour, and knowing how long Karin usually took to do her shopping, they couldn't have returned already.

...unless something happened to them.

I cursed beneath my breath because I did not have my weapon with me, but a barely subtle movement from my left brought a reluctant twinge of admiration as Sasuke had opened the top drawer of the desk to carefully slip one of Haku's throwing knives beneath his shirt.

The knock came again.

"Hello? Any body home?" came the familiar voice that had us all collectively releasing our breaths in relief. It was only Jae Weong.

Shikamaru rose to his feet to get the door, where the older man shook his hand with much enthusiasm before stepping into the room. I swear the guy never changed his outfit. You could always find him in a retro black, white or red track suit with worn slippers that scraped the floor as he walked. His thinning gray hair had been combed over to the left today, and that stench of his favorite noodles followed him around like a cloak. He smiled and nodded at Sasuke and me as he noticed what we were up to.

"Sorry to bother you boys while you work so hard," he said in his halting Japanese. "But there is phone call -"

"Is it Itachi?" Sasuke asked with an eagerness that was kinda heart twisting to see. Though he was trying to act cool about it, there was no doubt the guy was just as concerned as we were at not hearing anything from those two in almost a week. They should have reached Japan by now, so why hadn't they called or sent a message via their so-called 'intermediary'? Had they been attacked, ambushed or worse, killed?

Jae Weong seemed to understand Sasuke's worry, because he gave a sad smile and shook his head. "No, it's for Shikamaru-san. Your woman, eh?"

Shika couldn't hide his smile at the news, and he was quick to excuse himself. She would be arriving in about two days, so I bet the lovebirds were already making plans to shut themselves away in Itachi's apartment once she showed up. Lucky, lucky, _lucky_ bastard.

"So," Jae said with a grin, revealing crooked yellowing teeth. "You boys ready to begin your training?"

"Fuck training," Sasuke growled as he tapped his pencil restlessly on the paper. "Are you sure you've heard nothing from my brother or Shisui?"

Jae looked hurt at the sharp reprimand. "Hey, I only tell you what I know," he said with a shrug. "I keep eye and ear out for news, but nothing happening so far, which is good, no?"

"Not knowing could be bad," Sasuke said as he ran his fingers through his hair, which only did more to make the back end look spikier than ever. "It took us only two days to make it here, so they should be in Japan by now. Nothing in the papers here talk about any developments back home and the news on T.V. don't tell us much either."

Jae shrugged again and looked apologetic. He said something in Korean that I didn't quite catch, but I think he was apologizing again. Sasuke responded back in the native tongue; his grasp of the language almost effortless. Whatever he said brought a smile of relief to the older man's face.

"I will keep ear and eye open," he repeated, reverting back to Japanese again for my sake. "And keep you all posted, yes?"

Simultaneously, and not as if we planned it or anything, both Sasuke and I bowed our heads a little and thanked him in Korean. Jae reciprocated the gesture before excusing himself and leaving the two of us alone to our devices.

_Man, I was beat...and still worried..._

"What did you tell him?" I asked absently as I reached for a pencil that was sharper than the one I had worn out. I dragged Shika's outline for the East Block and tried to take notes on how to proceed with my next challenge.

"Nothing much," Sasuke muttered. I could hear him adjusting himself on his chair, the sound of the drawer being opened and the subsequent clatter of the knife being put back in its place. Is it just me or does he sound irritated?

"Didn't sound like nothing," I grumbled.

"I just said that he didn't have to feel too bad about it and he had nothing to apologize for. Happy now?"

Yep. Dude was definitely irritated and it was beginning to rub me the wrong way too. I'm just as stressed out as he is, goddamn it! Does he think he's the only one wanting to hear news about home? Speaking of which, I was still to make that phone call to Jiraiya, but with my current mindset, the notion of speaking to that guy didn't really seem all that interesting. Maybe when I was through with this damn thing, I could finally find the time to really talk to him.

Until then...

"I hate this fucking place," I muttered before I could control myself. I glared at the drawing of the infamous East Block and felt the familiar chill sear down my spine as I noticed Shikamaru had gotten as far as the lowest levels. I could smell that fat bastard; could smell that hot oil that coated his skin, hear his heavy panting...feel his hot, fetid breath all over me...

_Fuck!_

I suddenly felt like taking the mother of all showers.

"Naruto?" came the tentative call of my name that seemed to come from a thousand miles away.

I squeezed my eyes shut and took a deep breath. "I'm okay," I think I replied and forced my lashes open. "Just...thought of something disgusting that's all."

I sighed inwardly and swallowed; forcing myself to finish this tonight, even if it killed me.

"I'm..."

"Huh?" I asked with slight impatience at the hesitant mumble from my companion. I threw him a wary glance, noticing that his head was slightly bowed and he seemed to be struggling with something. His hands had formed tight fists and it was only a matter of time before the barely audible snap of the pencil in his grip signified that he was really tensed up. What was his problem now?

"...you..." He took a deep breath, closed his eyes and then lifted his lashes to give me a look that I swear had my stomach dropping with an anxiousness that I usually associated with feeling nervous or excited about something.

"I just wanted to say that...that..thank you," he finally ground out with an effort.

_Thank you?_ Thank you for _what_?

"I know this must be difficult for you," Sasuke continued in that same strained voice. "And you didn't have to help me...us...with this, so...I really appreciate it. That's all I wanted to say."

He was red in the face now, and was just about to turn around to face his work again, when I stopped him with my next words.

"I wanted to burn the place to the ground."

His reaction was priceless, and it brought a bittersweet smile to my face. Still, I kept his shocked gaze prisoner and continued my confession.

"That's why I know these locations so damn well." I tapped the pages of paper. "For hours, days, weeks, I studied every single place and kept it to memory. I drew up my own blueprint and swore I'd start up a fire to destroy every fucking inch of your precious home. Your brother and his organization had the same idea and didn't exactly execute it as planned...or maybe it was meant to be that way, but I didn't care. Byaku-Shinkyou deserved to be razed to the ground. To me, it's nothing more than an inky abyss of suffering, death, hatred and lies." I smiled again. "Still want to thank me for helping out?"

He opened his mouth, but nothing came out. I had hurt the guy, I could tell, but that was the truth, wasn't it? Even he must know what his home had become under Snake Dude. Why else would he be going back to take out the guy?

"I'm not sitting here blaming you for everything," I continued with a heavy sigh. I rubbed the back of my neck and leaned against the wall in weariness. "But you were there for most of it...and took part in most of what happened, so you must be living with that guilt every fucking day. I know I would. I couldn't live with myself if I knew I was the one responsible for so many unnecessary deaths and sentencing anyone who didn't look 'right' to me to Gudan." From beneath hooded lashes, I watched him carefully. He looked pale and conflicted; as if not sure if to feel upset or beat me senseless. I had a feeling he was close to leaning to the latter option.

"Did you enjoy it?" I asked bluntly.

"What?" came the hoarse whisper of disbelief. He couldn't believe I was asking him something like this probably.

"I asked if you enjoyed having so much power in your grasp. I'm sure you did. You liked the feeling of being in charge and holding the lives of others in your hands, didn't you?"

He shook his head and spun around. "I'm not dealing with this right now. We've got work to do -"

"Guess I got my answer there."

"Do not go about assuming anything!" he roared and spun back to face me. He slammed his hand on the desk, sending some of his writing materials flying. "You have no idea the pressure I was under on a constant basis! You have no fucking clue of what it's like working under a man like Orochimaru; how powerless you feel even when you think you've got everything under control! I might have been in control, but I hated every fucking second of it! I _despised_ what I was and what I had become!"

Whoa. I definitely wasn't expecting that outburst.

He lowered his head and took a deep breath to compose himself, but as if the craziness wasn't enough for one evening, he began to chuckle...and it soon became full-blown hysterical laughter which really had me worried about his sanity.

"Incredible," he gasped between cackles. "This is the first time I've admitted this openly...to _anyone_. For years, I kept this self-loathing within and now...it's finally out there. Hurray for epiphanies! I really am despicable, aren't I?"

I gave a wary smile. "You're the worst, that's for sure."

He smirked and reduced the maniacal laughter to a snort. "Thank you."

"Well, take heart," I said with forced cheerfulness. I pushed myself away from the wall and dragged my drawings closer to me again. "At least Karin wouldn't mind living with a psycho like you."

I could literally 'feel' his confusion from here.

"What are you talking about?"

I gave him a playful wink though I felt sick to my stomach for some reason. "You and Karin are getting pretty hot and heavy after all. Lucky you. Damn...I just realized that when you hook up with Karin, and Shika ends up with Temari, I'll be the only single dude here. Sheesh. Just my luck. If only Haku was a girl," I muttered absently beneath my breath. "There might be some hope there..."

"...Haku...?"

I shrugged. "You've gotta admit that your servant could fool the straightest of guys with the way he looks and acts sometimes." I smiled wistfully. "He's like...really awesome, if you know what I mean."

"I...I see..."

I looked up sharply at the change of tone in his voice, but he wasn't looking at me. He had turned back to his blueprints. Still, there was no mistaking the tension in his shoulders. Did the guy ever relax?

"So if he was a girl, you'd be with him?" came the low question.

"No doubt. I like the guy," I replied absently. _Now, if I recall correctly, there was a door here leading to the communal bathroom for all the sinners..._

"You're attracted to him?"

"...well if he was a girl..." I muttered and began drawing.

"What's the difference?" came the snapped question.

_The hell?_ What is this? An interrogation?

"The difference is that he's not a she!" I snapped back in growing annoyance.

"But you're still attracted to him."

"So?"

"Just like you were attracted to me on the bus? Just like you 'crushed' on me in the bus?"

I could feel my entire being burning with embarrassment at what he was implying. "Look, that was..."

Was what? Different? How? They were both guys and I had found myself wanting to be with them...no, that's wrong. I _thought_ Sasuke was a girl and Haku _did_ look like a girl so..._shit._ I'm so confusing myself here, goddamn it! I am supposed to be drawing up rooms and not having to worry about whether or not I wanted to hook up with a guy! Why wouldn't he just shut the fuck up and leave me alone?

I was just about to tell him that, when he glanced over his shoulder with a smirk that seemed to say so much. "You really don't know what you want, do you, Naruto?"

_What the hell is that supposed to mean?_

"Fuck you," I growled back, just as a light knock on the door signaled the appearance of my lifesaver.

_God bless you, Shikamaru. Come in quick before I really kill this guy._

However, it was the pensive expression on his visage that had both Sasuke and I sitting up with concern. It was rare for the guy to look this way, and it promptly sent my heart jackhammering within my chest.

Something was definitely up. Was it his girlfriend? Had something happened to her? Couldn't she make it after all?

"Shika?" I asked warily. "What's the matter, man? What's wrong?"

He looked at me with haunted eyes, and in a voice that was barely audible, he said five words that sent a chill down my spine.

"The Akatsuki base was bombed."


	25. 25: Dawn

Phew. This was a doozy of a chapter to write, why? Because it's got _a lot_ going on and it's the kind where you have to sit down and read through carefully or you might miss something. A few more familiar faces are creeping in, and all scenes/events that take place are important to our lead characters in the long (or short) run.

A big, big thank you to my wonderful reviewers. I am honestly too lazy (aka tired) to list each and every single one of you, but you know I love and appreciate all your comments and feedback from the bottomest part of my tainted...eh...innocent heart. Hope you like, and as always, your words are fodder for my stubborn muse. (((hugs)))

P.S: To those of you who have missed work, gone late to work or school, not studied for your exams, or got fired from your jobs for reading this story...I still love y'all! *LOL*

* * *

><p><strong>Extra Info:<strong> Please note that the different times for each event does not mean they all occurred on the same day.

**DPJ** – Democratic Party of Japan

**LDP** – Liberal Democratic Party of Japan

Extra points to whoever figures out why the chapter was given this title *lol*

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 25: Dawn<strong>

_The waves are gathered  
>On the shore of Sumi Bay,<br>And in the gathered night,  
>When in dreams I go to you,<br>I hide from people's eyes._

_-Fujiwara no Toshiyuki_

* * *

><p><strong><em>Sugadaira Kogen Inn<em>**

**_Kyoto, Japan_**

**_10:53pm_**

Another slow night.

_Sigh._

Matsuyama Hidachi yawned and polished a wooden table with its countless _sake_ and beer-stained marks forever embedded within, knowing damn well that no amount of cleaning products would get rid of them. However, deliberating over cleaning products was the least of his concerns. Business was hardly picking up these days and money was getting extremely tight. Though he had taken over the inn from his father almost thirty-years ago, Hidachi wondered when he'd finally be forced to shut the doors to an establishment that had been a staple in this community for over sixty-years. He would hate to see this place go, for so many memories of his childhood and all the different people he had come to know over the years were engrained in his soul. His wife had nagged from the beginning; claiming that it was best he just sell it to the highest bidder, get the money and retire somewhere in Okinawa. Why go through all the hassle of trying to survive day to day when there were serious buyers willing to chip in the cash to help him?

_Pfft. Help me? Like she'd understand anything,_ he thought ruefully as he spat on the rag and continued polishing with a little more vehemence. _She doesn't understand what it means to be the owner of a business._

And besides, Hell would freeze over before he handed over his family's pride and joy to those Bakufu bastards.

The Syndicate had sent their dogs to 'threaten' him over ownership of the inn several times already, which was not unexpected considering they just about owned every other damn business in this neighborhood. Hidachi could still remember the first meeting he had with the _yakuza_ representatives (after all Ikegami Ryoichi could not be bothered to make the journey himself), where they had offered him quite a large sum of money to relinquish all rights to the inn.

Hidachi wouldn't lie and say the thought hadn't crossed his mind to simply take the cash and run. After all, he had a wife and three growing children to feed. However, seeing his father and grandfather's face - those tough, gritty men who had stood in the face of adversity and kept this inn going strong – fill his mind had squashed his pitiful thought quickly. How could he shame the Matsuyama family name? How could he walk away from something that had been built from the ground up with sweat, tears, and so much love? How could he sell his soul to the devil and look his children in the eye afterwards? How could he call himself a man?

No. Hidachi was too proud to bow down to the likes of Ikegami and his cronies. He would keep on working until they dragged his dead body out of here. _Hmph._ If nothing else, it would show his sellout neighbors that he was not a quitter like them.

"G'night, Matsuyama-san!" came the hail from the regular, who waved as he stepped out of the door, and into another chilly night.

Hidachi stopped long enough to reciprocate the gesture, forcing a warm smile on his face though he felt anything but happy at the moment. He lowered his hand and mentally counted that there were about six more customers left. A few faces he was familiar with, the others looked like tourists. He glanced towards the bar, where his eldest son (now a senior in high school) was helping tonight. Yoshistune was a good kid; a son any father would be proud to have. Hidachi would really love to leave this business in his care someday; to look his son in the eye and say:

"My boy…you've earned this. Keep the Matsuyama name going strong and make your ancestors proud."

With an inner sigh, he allowed his gaze to drift toward the kitchen where he could see the shadow of his wife bustling about as she cleaned and prepared for another closing day. Sure she nagged him to death most of the time, but there was no doubt that she still loved and cared for him in her own way. His two youngest children – the twin girls who were just in middle school – were giggling and sweeping the back of the restaurant, and watching their interaction brought a small smile to his face.

Yes, in the grand scheme of things, he was a very lucky man. Maybe now they might be struggling, but someday…_someday_ he was definitely going to –

**CRASH!**

"Huh?" He looked up sharply at the jarring sound of glass shattering. His first assumption was that his wife or daughters had broken something, but it took him a second later to realize that the shattered glass was actually the front window of his inn. Someone had thrown something into the store and that something was currently rolling along the ground and straight toward him.

_What the hell is…?_

It would be his last coherent thought as the sudden thunderous explosion rocked the entire building off its very foundation, sending Matsuyama Hidachi's pride and joy into a billowing cloud of fire and smoke.

Later, eye witnesses would claim that they saw a black van stop by, where a man in a billowing black cloak had leapt out and yelled the words 'IN THE NAME OF AKATSUKI!' before throwing the damning bomb into the building.

All agreed it was a shame such a thing had to happen to such a wonderful family (and business), but little would they know that the nightmare was only just beginning.

* * *

><p><strong><em>The Youth Complex<em>**

**_Nagano, Japan_**

**_5.24pm_**

"…reporting live from the compound of The Youth Complex, where an explosion went off about an hour ago. So far we have a tally of about ten dead and fifty young people injured, and as you can see the paramedics and police are doing their best to get everyone out to safety. No one is quite sure of who is responsible for this, or why they are doing this, but some witnesses are saying that they saw several mysterious figures in black who claim that they are doing this in the name of the vigilante group "Akatsuki." You also remember that this same terrorist group is the one responsible for the destruction of parts of Byaku-Shinkyou early this year, and as it stands, there is a warrant out for anyone with more information about this terrorist organization and its members…"

* * *

><p><strong><em>Kitano Street<em>**

**_Kobe, Japan_**

**_8:45pm_**

Amidst the flashing lights of the horses, police cars and ambulances, a growing throng of people hovered behind the yellow tape just before the bullet-ridden house; many of them (the females mostly) sobbing within handkerchiefs or openly, while the men looked on with shocked or slack-jawed expressions. It was hard to believe that just half an hour earlier; this once lovely home had belonged to a prominent member of the government. Neighbors and passersby would testify that they had heard a van screeching into the quiet community and then the deafening and frightening sounds of machine gun fire. There must have been at least ten shooters or really high-powered weapons used because the destruction was nothing short of catastrophic. The family, who had been having dinner at the time, was all gunned down at the unexpected ambush. Not even a servant was spared as the murderers made sure every single individual in the compound was eliminated.

At only forty-five, he had been a rising star of the parliament, but there was no doubt he had made many enemies, for he was one of the few politicians willing to speak out against the Syndicate and other such illegal activities in the country. Many whispered amongst themselves that it was only a matter of time before the _yakuza_ made their move. However, no one had expected to see that a so-called vigilante group would be responsible for such brutal killings; for they had been brazen enough to spray paint their name on the walls as loud and as boldly as they could:

**AKATSUKI!**

* * *

><p><strong><em>Shibuya Station<em>**

**_Tokyo, Japan_**

**_10:32pm_**

He walked briskly through the throng of people, hardly missing a step as he covered his head and face with the hoodie of his jacket. Burying his hands into the pockets, he jogged down the steps and toward the underground section of the still bustling station despite its somewhat late hour.

On the platforms, white collar workers stood in a semi-comatose state after the strains of the day. Like manufactured zombies, in their black suits or white shirts, they yawned, stared blankly ahead or were buried nose-deep in the newspapers. Teenage girls, some still in their school uniforms, giggled and engaged in meaningless conversation, while the older women looked on with envy and thoughts of waiting husbands and families at home who expected dinner.

He stopped beside a business man in glasses, who was reading a late edition newspaper, and winced inwardly at the headline that blared at him:

**BOMBING ROCKS DOWNTOWN NAGANO**

**Vigilante Group – Akatsuki – believed to be responsible.**

In a much smaller header there was:

**PUBLIC OUTCRY FOR ARREST OF VIGILANTE GROUP RISING!**

Having read enough, he blended in with the crowd as the loud churning grind and whine of an approaching train filled the underground cavern. There was a sudden surge of humanity towards the edge of the platform, and he knew this was his opportunity to slip through the blink-and-you-just-might-miss-it door behind one of the moving escalators.

He failed to notice his silent pursuers.

The door led one through an extremely narrow passageway where steel pipes and electrical wiring formed shields around him. The light in here was pitiful as only a few naked light bulbs illuminated the way. He hated having to touch the wall, where years of dust, dirt, and slime (no thanks to water leaking from somewhere) were likely to leave un-washable streaks on your skin. Still, it was deafening to hear the trains from here as the very ground seemed to rattle and shake as you walked. You could barely hear yourself think.

Still, every sense in him heightened as he heard a sound behind him. His fingers gripped the gun within his pocket, while spinning around at the same time with his heart in his throat. He was not a big fan of the weapon, and would rather have dealt with hand-to-hand combat, but if he was indeed followed, this was the fastest way to take care of his pursuer in such an enclosed space. However, all he could see where flickering shadows. The door he had come in from looked a million miles away, and with the rattling of the walls, the bulbs seemed to sway causing a dangerous play of light and shadows that made it extremely difficult to see if there was someone behind him, or just the steel pipes creating the illusion.

"Fuck this," he whispered breathlessly; trying hard to steady his thudding heartbeat. Swallowing, he spun on his heels and began to walk a little faster, but it was tricky this time for the ceiling was considerably lower and it forced him to crouch a little.

_Faster...must get there faster..._

He could definitely hear something behind him now, but he knew turning around was not going to be an option. If whoever was following him wanted him dead, he would have been killed by now. No, he was going to wait until he made the fork and then pump the son-of-a-bitch full of lead.

He realized he was panting and sweat was beginning to pour down his neck and back. He had to switch his gun from his left hand to the right, wiping the damp palm against his slacks as he ducked yet again and finally –

(thank God!)

...came to the turn that would lead him to the hideout. The large circular opening beckoned like a beacon and by this time, the ceiling was higher again and he could walk without having to crouch. Of course, it was a little tricky and first timers always got thrown off at the sudden drop. However, he was used to it, and taking a deep breath, he dashed towards the opening and leapt down almost three feet into ankle-deep water with a loud splash.

Now one could say they were truly in the depths of Tokyo for this was just one of the many entrances into a labyrinth of unused tunnels miles beneath the surface. With its ceiling nearly twenty feet high and sturdy stone walls as old as time, it really was an architectural masterpiece, but there was really no time to stand around admiring the place. Besides, he had explored it so many times already, he could walk through parts of it blindfolded. Hardly waiting to catch his breath, he dashed toward one of the smaller pipes and crawled into it to hide, hardly caring about being soaked to the skin of dealing with some sewage that drifted past him. He clutched the gun tightly in his palms; sucking in lungful of much-needed air while stealing panicked glances toward the larger pipe he had jumped out of.

As he suspected, he _was_ being followed by two rather big guys (how the fuck had they hidden in that narrow passage in the first place?) in black suits and guns withdrawn. Even from his vantage point, he could see that they were yakuza, and he bit his lower lip as he cocked his weapon and waited for an opportunity.

"Fuck," one of them cursed. Incredible how loud their voices carried in here. "Where'd go?"

"Guess we gotta jump down to find out."

"Can't mess up my suit, man. This shit cost me my whole paycheck -"

"Fuck your paycheck!" the bigger of them growled impatiently. He was already preparing to jump; the two morons failing to notice there was a steel rung ladder against the wall. "You heard the boss. Find their motherfucking hideout and take out whoever is there. The more we stand here talking, the further the bastard's getting. We should -"

"Shsssssh!" the smaller one hissed. "Listen...I hear something..."

The three held their breath and sure enough, coming from their right was the sound of laughter and talking from at least two...no three people.

"Bingo..." the smaller said with a grin. "They're coming this way..."

_Fire a warning shot,_ the hidden man thought frantically. He recognized the voices approaching, and prayed to goodness that they weren't that close enough. With every once of concentration in his being, he took a deep breath and expelled it gently between pursed lips...held up the gun...closed an eye and pointed its target at the bigger of the two.

_Easy...easy now..._

And just as the big man began to take a step forward, the deafening sound of the gunshot had ever party freezing in their tracks...before the loud howl of pain from the bigger man filled the silence accompanied by the almost dramatic sight of him falling out of the pipe and into the water below. He was still howling in pain and clutching his right ear where bright red blood poured out like a faulty faucet. His companion bellowed his name and attempted to dive for him, but another gunshot was fired and this time it caught him in the upper thigh, which sent him tumbling into the waters as well.

The unseen voices had now made the turn, and just as he had suspected, there were three of his comrades, each of them with either a gun or katana in hand; ready to attack the intruders.

"The fuck...?" one of them began as he walked closer to the two moaning men, when the hidden man bellowed out in warning.

"Be careful! I think they are probably _yakuza_!"

"Lee?" came the incredulous query from the only female in the group; though with the way she was dressed in a silk black mandarin jacket and pants, it was hard to tell. "Is that you?"

"Hey...Tenten," the man greeted with a sheepish smile, as he crawled out of the pipe and waded toward his waiting and bemused friends. The one who had walked closer to the downed assassins, eyed the soaking wet black-haired young man and snorted.

"Good thing you shot them or else -"

"Look out, Neji!" Tenten yelled as the bigger man had tried to rise to his feet to pull the trigger. However, she needn't have bothered because Neji – with almost graceful movement – swung his _katana_ in a lightening quick arch that sent both gun and the man's right hand flying off into the air before both splashed into the water.

His face was an almost comical look of shock before it drained of color as he fell back to the ground in a dead faint. His companion, who had tried to do the same, could only blubber in surrender as the girl towered over him as she slowly licked the steel blade of her throwing knife.

"Welcome to your worst nightmare," she said with a smirk and forming a fist, drove it right into his face to shatter bone and cartilage. He collapsed like a stone and was mercifully out before the pain could set in.

"Still as vicious as ever," Neji praised as he put away his sword and turned to their other silent companion. "Let's take them to the hideout, Shino."

"Roger." The tall man, in the dark glasses, reached for the now one-handed yakuza and began to drag him toward the area they had just come from.

Neji eyed his other comrade. "Lee...are you hurt anywhere?"

"No..." Lee eyed himself. Besides soaking wet and smelling like shit, he was still breathing normally. "I'm all right. I'll help with this one." He reached out to assist in dragging the smaller of the two.

"What should we do next? What if they're others waiting?" Tenten asked as she led the way while glancing toward their unofficial leader. With his height, extremely good looks, impressive fighting skills, and an intellect that could rival any genius, Neji Hyūga had always been their leader anyway...at least for their branch in this section of the city. Itachi might not have said it out loud during their meetings, but it was clear that Neji was the one who made sure orders were executed according to the headquarters' directions. He was, no doubt, treated with respect by so many others in the organization.

"Contact Itachi and Shisui-san immediately," Neji replied with a grim expression on his visage. "They are beginning to seep into our territories rapidly, and if anyone else shows his face here, we take 'em out."

"There's a traitor out there," Shino muttered beneath his breath. "Wonder who it is."

"Who _they_ are," Neji deduced solemnly. "People are weak now and are willing to do anything to survive, and it doesn't help that we have copycats going out there and committing these terrible acts under our names. Let's just try to keep our ears and eyes open. All right?"

And in unison, the young people gave a solemn "right" in response; each more than aware of how dangerous their situation had eventually become.

* * *

><p><strong><em>Wet End Bar<em>**

**_Shinjuku, Japan_**

**_11.32pm_**

Drinks flowed. Babes glowed. The music was loud and all was right with the world.

Shinpachi took another long toke from the rolled up weed; high as a fucking kite and king of the motherfucking planet. He had managed to snag a coveted V.I.P. booth tonight, where he was surrounded by the most beautiful babes his money could buy. He squeezed the voluptuous breast pressed against his side, laughing aloud as the girl gave a pitiful moan and leaned even more into him. The other chick on his right, he smacked her ass as hard as he could, cackling again when she gave a lustful moan and kissed his scarred cheek.

"You're so mean, Shinpachi-san," she whined playfully.

"Bad as I wanna be, babe!" he roared back and proceeded to worry her neck with sloppy, wet kisses while attacking her breasts by tugging down the spaghetti strap of her dress and kneading them as hard as he could.

He was in heaven, and God knows he was going to enjoy himself for as long as he fucking cou –

"Having fun, Shinpachi?" came the low question; so low that despite the cacophony in the packed nightclub, Shinpachi could still hear every damn word. For a second, he told himself he was only imagining that voice, but when something hard pressed against his temple and the undeniable click of the weapon's hammer filled his ear, he felt his balls shrivel up in fear. The high was wearing off as quickly as it had come.

The stupid whores suddenly screaming like banshees only made the situation more real to him. He swallowed and finally turned his head a little to see for himself if his worst nightmare had come to life, and sure enough…here he was standing in the flesh.

Kisame Hoshigaki – the baddest motherfucker this side of Japan if not Asia. Many believed he had once been a member of the Syndicate, but who could really know of his back story? He was as mysterious as he was dangerous, and most were wise not to mess with him on any given day.

"…Ki…Kisame-san…" Shinpachi croaked though lips that felt swollen and yet parched. Trust his ill-luck to be caught tonight; his last night of partying before splitting town.

The big man, in a well-tailored suit, with pale skin and shark-like teeth grinned in response. This motion made the fish scale-like scars on his cheeks to give him a more ferocious appearance.

"Long time no see, you traitor," he rasped in a voice that could almost be considered (deceptively) friendly if it wasn't for the expression on his face.

Immediately, Shinpachi began blubbering. "I...I didn't do anything, Kisame-san! I swear to God! I didn't do anything!"

The grin didn't diminish, though the dark eyes narrowed in disgust and restrained fury. "Oh? Sold us out to the Syndicate, didn't you? You worthless piece of shit."

"I didn't -!"

"How much did they pay you this time?"

Shinpachi sniveled and shook his head; his limp blond hair flying into eyes that were filling with tears. "I swear to God, they were going to kill my family if I didn't tell them! I had to tell them, Kisame-san! I had to -"

"Go straight to hell."

The silencer lessened the impact of the gunshot to Shinpachi's temple, but it wasn't enough to stop the silly girls from screaming even louder than before until Kisame shut them up efficiently. A damn pity though. They were kinda cute.

"Hey!" It was one of the security people; some fresh-faced asshole trying to act tough. He reached out to touch Kisame's arm from behind. "What do you think you'reURGH!"

Poor guy didn't know what hit him as Kisame's elbow jerked out to connect solidly with the man's nose and mouth. He crumbled to the floor, sending the mostly stoned clubbers scrambling and screaming for the exits as they began to finally realize what was going on.

_Shit._ Kisame groaned inwardly as more of the security began to run toward him with their weapons withdrawn. Hadn't Itachi and Shisui warned him about this?

/Don't make too much of a scene, you trigger-happy-bastard. Get rid of him and get out of there as quickly as you can. Got it?/

_Ah well. Forgive me, Shisui._

It's been a while since he had any action, and it wouldn't hurt to take out a few more people before making his escape.

"Come at me, you fuckers," he sneered and cracked his knuckles before kissing the tip of his gun as if in salute. "Let's say we get this party really started."

* * *

><p><strong><em>Port of Senshu<em>**

**_Osaka Prefecture_**

**_12:14am_**

Jesus fucking Christ, but it was too fucking cold.

He blew on his hands and rubbed them together, wishing he had taken Sasori-san's advice and worn gloves. However, he knew the art of wiring explosives was not something to be taken lightly. It took a great amount of skill and his genius intellect to know exactly where to place each bomb to make the most impact. It wasn't as simple as tossing a bomb into buildings – like those fake Akatsuki terrorists had been doing. If you were doing to destroy something, at least destroy it in _style_. In fact, it was safe to say that no one appreciated his art; not even Itachi or Shisui-san, despite how good a job he had done during the Byaku-Shinkyou raid.

_And they sent me here too,_ he grumbled as he darted amongst the shadows created by the large cargo ships. _Someday, I'll make them see just how invaluable I really am._

He stopped and held his breath as he heard incoming footsteps and voices. He pressed himself tighter against the large crates; a hand absently reaching for the small throwing knife attached to his waist. His job wasn't to kill anyone, though if necessity called for it, he would have no other choice but to defend himself. However, it wouldn't do to be discovered either.

His instructions had been concise and absolute. Rig three specific ships that would be arriving tonight from Taiwan, each containing illegal goods (mostly weapons) for the Bakufu Syndicate. In other words, the port was currently swarming with _yakuza_, port officials, crew, and the watchdogs they had paid off. He would have less than thirty minutes to get all three ships rigged with his specially made high-powered explosives before the trucks arrived to begin carting off the goods. He took pride in his creations, and there was no doubt that the countless hours spent in the 'studio' slaving over just the right chemical compositions would pay off tonight. He was going to make sure of it.

The footsteps and voices finally trailed away, and immediately he slipped out of his hiding place and dashed across the lot to hide again behind another large pile of crates. He realized he was beginning to sweat, and he hated knowing that. His art required keeping a level head about him. This was no time to panic or doubt the plan would work.

Carefully, he slung the backpack off his shoulders and dug into it quickly to find the materials he needed. He could see the second ship from his vantage point – The _Ana Maria_ –

_Stupid name for a ship,_ he thought with a sneer. A quick mental calculation told him he had about a hundred yards to his target, and taking a deep breath, he blended into the shadows and dashed toward the vessel. He was just about to make the turn, and would have run smack dab into a line of incoming crew members, when he was unceremoniously yanked back into the darkness by an unseen hand.

He spun around with his heart in his throat and anger coursing through his veins; ready to dish out a blow at least to whoever had stopped him. However, all fight eased out of his body as he noticed the cool and almost distant brown eyes staring back at him.

"You really are an idiot, aren't you, Deidara?" came the low whisper. "Be more aware of your surroundings, for crying out loud."

"Took you long enough, Sasori-san," Deidara hissed back with a scowl and his cheeks flaming with embarrassment at almost blowing his cover. "Where the fuck were you?"

"Taking care of my side of things," Sasori replied with a nod toward something before Deidara. "How much time left?"

Deidara glanced at his watch. "Twenty. Cover me, and I should be able to get the last one done. Got it?"

Sasori gave a curt nod, and just as quickly as he appeared, seemed to leap out of sight. It never ceased to amaze Deidara how fast the shorter guy was. Even if said shorter guy was technically his _senpai_ in the organization; that baby face of his would have fooled anyone. Deidara had learned the hard way not to mock the red-haired man about his height or possible fighting skills. He had ended up in hospital for about two days after their fight. Sheesh.

Half-an-hour later, their shadowed figures watched the port – which now looked like a miniature city – far below them. The trucks were beginning to pull in and the air was filled with the mingled sounds of machinery churning, instructions being yelled and the _clang clang clang_ of ships being towed in and docked. All in all, it just another night at one of the busiest industrial ports in the city.

"Beautiful night, isn't it?" Sasori mused quietly as he watched the lights of the city twinkle across the still waters of the sea.

"A very beautiful night indeed," Deidara agreed with a smile, while counting beneath his breath and finishing with a breathy, "Boom."

_Breathtaking._

Even he couldn't deny that this was his most spectacular piece of art created yet, and he just couldn't wait to hear the verdict from the two men he admired most in the world.

* * *

><p><strong><em>Tokyo Metropolitan Matsuzawa Hospital<em>**

**_Tokyo, Japan_**

**_11:23am_**

Shimura Danzo clutched the newspaper so tightly between his hands, it threatened to be ripped in half at any second. The words on the page seemed to mock him:

**PORT OF SENSHU EXPLOSION**

**Over 10million¥ worth of illegal cargo destroyed in bombing.**

He wasn't so much concerned about the lives lost, but at the idea that somehow, someone would connect the dots and trace the brains behind the whole operation to him. The past few days had been nothing short of a nightmare, and having to watch the news and see his frantic second-in-command try his best to answer the pestering press about plans to arrest the 'terrorists' was beginning to take a toll on him. He had assumed being in the hospital would have provided some sort of respite from the chaos, but no such luck. Some of the damn media had the gall to show up at the hospital, demanding a statement from Danzo about the seemingly random attacks. The people needed his reassurance and leadership, and as the acting Commissioner of Police, it was his duty to do so.

As if on cue, his right shoulder and upper arm began to burn beneath the thick wad of bandages wrapped around it. He winced and clamped a trembling hand against it, gritting his teeth and wishing the damn nurse would show up to give him his painkillers or at least a large shot of morphine. Beads of sweat broke out on his brow as the memory of the bullet piercing through his skin and ripping through muscles and bone to embed itself within his body, filled his mouth with bitterness. Knowing who was responsible for his now useless arm made it even worse. To think that the first son of that bastard, Fugaku, would still be alive...it was just too bitterly ironic. So far, none of his special team within the watchdogs, had been able to find the elusive bastard despite weeks of scouring the country since the incident at Gudan.

Speaking of which, he had not heard much from Orochimaru besides his few public appearances on T.V. and the 'funeral' held for Uchiha Sasuke. Danzo had snorted in derision, wondering why anyone in their right mind would buy the notion of Uchiha Sasuke being dead. This was no doubt another one of Orochimaru's ploys, and it would all tie into the fact that despite his messages to the pale-skinned fool, he had received nothing in return. The same went for Ryoichi Ikegami, now that he thought about it. He had barely heard from the _kumichō_ of the Syndicate in a while now, and he was sure that this news about the explosion would have had the worthless fool crying at his bedside and seeking guidance.

_Something isn't right..._

A timid knock at the door had him straightening up and trying to look as composed as possible. He barked out a curt "Enter", and the nurse he had been seeking entered with a shy bow and matching smile. He did not reciprocate the gesture, simply scowling at the pretty brunette with rather pale eyes and quite a well-endowed bosom. He strained his memory banks, but he was sure she had never been in his room before. Being in such a high position (and with quite a few enemies), he had taken up an entire private wing in the building, where it was heavily protected by no less than five bodyguards for each shift. No one walked into this section of the building without being put through a strict background check.

He noticed her badge read the name "Asako Mina", and just as he was about to pester her with questions about her credentials, there was another knock on the door. This time, the visitor was none other than his private secretary, Torune. He bowed to both the nurse and his boss before pulling up a chair and placing some documents within the outstretched hand.

"The funeral for Councilman Kansei's and his family will be held this Saturday. Do you plan to attend, Danzo-_dono_?"

Danzo grunted. "Of course. It would only show the people that the so-called feud between us is nothing more than a fabrication by the media. My presence there should shut them up sufficiently."

He had an idea of who was responsible for the death of the brash, young opportunistic politician, and it angered Danzo that he was so bold as to assassinate him in such a volatile climate. Hiding it under the name of 'Akatsuki' was just too convenient, wasn't it?

"So I assume you'll be released on Friday?" Torune queried.

"I will be out of here by then," Danzo hissed. He had been stuck in this damn place for too long. The sooner he got out of here the better. He had to be in charge again; for it seemed as if the world was going askew without his leadership.

_First thing I'll do is pay my little friend Ryoichi a visit. He seems to have forgotten who got him into that position in the first place. _

"Councilman Onoki is getting bolder," Torune stated quietly. "He is already gathering several other members of the DPJ to oust you from your position as commissioner."

"That old washed up has-been," Danzo growled beneath his breath. This wasn't the first time he had opponents wanting him out of power. All he had to do was buy out a few of the opposing party members and his job was secure. Onoki could only rant and rave like the mad man he was. Danzo all but tore the envelope open and read through the documents quickly. "What about Councilman Mu? He is still on my side, isn't he?"

"Yes...for now. His constituents might be voting him out of office soon, and he requests a meeting with you..." Torune's voice trailed off.

"Yes," Danzo muttered. "More money obviously." He raised a brow when he noticed his secretary looking restless. "Well? What else? Spit it out already."

Torune took a deep breath. "I cannot confirm this, sir, but I believe that Ikegami-dono might be behind some of the random bombings and attacks taking place across the country."

Danzo lowered the documents to pin the other man with an intense stare. "What are you talking about?"

"The word is that Orochimaru-sama might be in cohorts with Ikegami-dono behind your back, sir. He – and I mean Orochimaru-sama – might also be funding Councilman Onoki's attempts to get you out of office. With these attacks, all in the guise of it being Akatsuki's doing, they plan to expose your incompetence and get the public's opinion to sway in the favor of electing Noda-san as your replacement."

Danzo, who had been digging his fingernails into his palm as he heard this, and hardly aware of the drops of blood forming from the pressure and pain he was inflicting on himself, realized now just how much he had been taken for a ride after all this time. He should have known Orochimaru would throw him under the bus and want to take everything for himself. What made it even worse was that the **fool **– Ryoichi Ikegami – had _betrayed_ him. To think that he had assisted in getting rid of his once biggest threat – Minato Namikaze – only to be treated like this in the end.

Ah, but two…no three could play that game. Oh yes, they could, and what better way to pay back Ikegami, but bringing back Minato's _ghost_ to finish up a job that should have begun years ago.

_You have both grossly underestimated me._

"Torune," he began coldly.

"Yes, Danzo-_dono_?"

"Listen, and listen carefully. I am only going to repeat this once. There is someone I need you to find at all costs…"

And as he began to give his secretary specific instructions, both men were completely oblivious to their listening party; the sweet, innocent nurse who never let a word slip past her attention under the perfect guise of performing her healing duties.

* * *

><p><strong><em>Undisclosed location,<em>**

**_Tokyo, Japan_**

**_1:15am_**

As soon as Kisame entered the room, the arrow caught the sleeve of his jacket and pinned him tightly against the wall. He cursed and tried to yank it out, but the second one lodged itself in a dangerously sensitive area between his legs almost forcing him to let go of his bladder at the painful vision of his penis being pierced with the damn thing.

"You bastard," he growled at the figure in the shadows before it revealed itself while lowering the bow.

"I warned you not to get into any trouble," Shisui drawled with a cold smirk. Dressed in a black sweater and matching pants, he gave the impression of being relaxed; though one could tell he was barely restraining himself. "You never learn, do you, Kisame?"

The bigger man smirked in return. "I do your dirty work and this is the thanks I get?" He spat. "Next time, you and pretty boy do it."

"Oh? Then who's going to get this?"

An envelope was flung his way, and Kisame caught it deftly; the smirk becoming a grin as he realized what was in it. "Where's Itachi?" he asked as he finally dislodged himself from the wall and straddled a wooden chair to count his pay.

"Talking to the Hyūga kid," Shisui replied as he went to pick up his precious arrows, only to frown in displeasure as he realized Kisame had managed to snap them. Damn that asshole and his strength.

"Oh yeah?" Kisame raised a brow. "Those kids in trouble now?"

Before Shisui could answer, Itachi strode into the living room with a pensive expression on his visage. He was dressed in similar fashion to Shisui, only he had a black trench coat as well; a sign he was probably just arriving from somewhere himself. He nodded at Kisame in greeting, but had his eyes only for Shisui and they spoke volumes.

"It's worse than we thought," Itachi began as he paced to the landscape windows to peer down into the Tokyo skyline at night. They noticed his hands were clenched into tight fists, and both Kisame and Shisui exchanged a glance of mute understanding at their companion's aggravation.

The past few weeks had been nothing short of a nightmare for all of them as the attacks were becoming more rampant by the day. What was worse was that the ones responsible kept using the name 'Akatsuki' hence ruining and tarnishing their reputation. The public wanted their heads, the watchdogs were in hot pursuit, and of course, the Syndicate probably had their henchmen hunting them down as well. Many members had fled for their safety; denouncing their involvement with the group, or worse selling them out to whomever was willing to pay for information. The worst loss suffered so far, was the unfortunate bombing at the Youth Complex, where some of their members had been participating in a positive event for the community. Of course, no one had known they were actually members of Akatsuki, but the traitor(s) must have said they'd show up there anyway.

Only Shisui would know just how hurt and devastated Itachi had been at the news. From the moment they had stepped foot on that boat, which was to take them back to Japan, they had literally been bombarded with one bad news after the other. Though both men had planned to call the 'fugitives' back in Buk-gu upon their arrival, there was hardly any time to do so. With so many deaths and traitors running around, Itachi and Shisui knew they had some cleaning up to do and fast.

It was the reason why their retaliation had been swift. With Kisame's ability to sniff out the turncoats, it was only a matter of time before they were delivered the justice they deserved. Destroying those ships was just the tip of the iceberg in their payback to those greedy bastards in power. Slowly, but surely, they were going to wipe the slate clean and restore order where it was desperately needed.

Their next stop – the DIET.

"They still have the _yakuza_ as prisoners," Itachi added after he recounted the story Neji had told him. "And they wanted to know what to do with them."

"What else is there to do with them? Interrogate the bastards and if they don't talk," Kisame made a slicing motion across his neck.

Shisui smirked and shrugged. "As good as that sounds, I think we should move them out of that base. If those two told any others about where they were heading, you can be sure they'll be swarming all over the tunnels looking for the hideout."

Itachi nodded and was just about to head back to the den to place the call when a knock on the door had them turning toward it in unison.

"Expecting anyone?" Kisame asked as he rose to his feet. Itachi glanced at his watch and gave a small smile.

"Our little angel has arrived."

"Ooooh…nice," Kisame sneered and peered through the peep hole. It was a female all right, and one he knew. _Damn._ And here he thought it was a hooker. But then again…had these two guys ever ordered any whores for a good time? He had never seen them partying before…

Shaking himself from his distracting thoughts, he asked the password/code to get in, and at the satisfactory answer, he unlocked the door and bowed in greeting.

"Welcome to the lair, Hinata-_hime_. You are looking as ravishing as ever."

Hinata Hyuga blushed prettily and hid a giggle behind a hand as she walked past him. She gave a dainty courtesy before Shisui and Itachi as they too smiled at her in greeting. After taking off her shoes, she peeled off her jacket to reveal that she was still in her nurse's uniform, which Kisame shamelessly ogled. What a body!

"Any luck today?" Shisui asked, while Itachi offered her something to drink as she settled onto a sofa. It was a Spartan 'apartment', if you could call it that, but still comfortable enough, and she always liked coming here…at least whenever they were in town.

"More than enough," she replied in a voice that was a gentle as she appeared. It was hard for anyone to believe that she could be a member of such a group of fighters, but she had her strengths and it mostly came in healing and ciphering – though she could hold her own in a fight if it ever came to that. She accepted the cup of tea and took a grateful sip.

"You weren't followed, were you?" Kisame asked warily.

"I don't think so," she replied with a shake of her head. "But anyway, I finally got a chance to hear quite a lot. The other days, he was either asleep or not in a very talkative mood, but tonight…he sang like a canary."

She reached for her handbag and dug into it for a minute before finding what she was looking for. It was a small cassette tape, which she handed over to Itachi with a shy smile. "I'm sure you'll find it interesting. I most certainly did."

"Great job, "Asako"," Shisui teased, which in turn earned another bashful smile from the young woman, at the mention of her fake name. Itachi, who had left to find a recorder, returned with the device and slipped the tape in. For the next thirty minutes or so, they listened to Danzo and Torne's voices fill the silence, neither person in the room even daring to breathe (it seemed) as they absorbed what was planned.

"Well, I'll be fucked," Shisui murmured once the tape ended and it began to rewind itself. He looked at Itachi and wasn't surprised to find his partner's face was as dark as his thoughts probably were. "This is getting pretty messed up."

"No doubt about it. Both men do not trust each other and it looks like it might end up being an all out war between them."

"Which is more than fine with me, if they decide to take each other out," Shisui muttered beneath his breath. Except he did remember that both Naruto and Sasuke had wanted to deal with those two on their own.

"Who is this Uzumaki Naruto?" Hinata asked innocently. That was the only bit of the conversation she could not really grasp as Danzo had seemed adamant to find this person for some reason.

Itachi and Shisui shared a glance, and at a barely perceptible shrug from Shisui, Itachi replied quietly. "He's a friend of ours…a young man of about your age whose father would have been the leader of the Syndicate if it wasn't for Danzo and Ikegami. And now…Danzo wants Naruto to help him. Does the guy really believe that Naruto wouldn't know he was responsible for Minato's death?"

"But then again, what stops Danzo from not feeding Naruto some bullshit story about he being the innocent party in all of that fiasco and making it seem like Ikegami was the one responsible from the beginning."

"Naruto isn't that gullible, is he?" Hinata asked with a bemused frown. "If he knows the truth about his father and the people behind it, I don't see how or why he would want to help Danzo."

"Or why wouldn't he?" Kisame said with a slow smile that didn't exactly make him look any handsomer. "If I were Naruto, I'd say 'yes' to whatever the hell Danzo has to say and take the guy out when he's not looking. Kill two motherfucking birds with one stone."

"Danzo's not that stupid either," Itachi mused. "The guy is a master manipulator as the tape reveals."

"So the question is…do we allow Danzo to find Naruto and risk exposing Sasuke's whereabouts?" Shisui asked with an intense look at his partner. "We can't just do that, Itachi."

"…"

"How about…telling Naruto about it?" Hinata offered tentatively. "I mean…call him and let him know what's going on and let him decide what he wants to do."

"The woman's got a point," Kisame drawled. "Let Naruto decide, eh? After all, this is his battle when you really look at it."

Itachi pursed his lips tightly and taking a deep breath seemed to come to a conclusion. Besides, it was a long overdue phone call and he had been dying to know just how well they were doing; not only health-wise, but relationship-wise.

"Fair enough," he finally said aloud. "We'll ask him. Hinata, I need you to contact your cousin and tell him I'll be sending a few others to help in taking out the prisoners. We're also going to have to abandon that base for now. Continue to keep your eyes and ears open at the hospital…well at least until Danzo leaves the place. Kisame…"

The big guy waved a hand for he already knew what was going to be asked of him. "Not to worry. I'm gonna be at the port to see her off tomorrow, and pay a visit to a few other buddies of mine that just don't know how to shut up."

"Don't forget the package," Itachi pointed toward a large box where they had packed a few extra homebred items the crew in Korea might appreciate.

"Roger that."

After goodnights had been said, and Kisame offered to escort Hinata home, the two men were left with hearts heavy with the burden they were forced to bear. For even as they sat and drew up plans, they were more than aware of the many lives they held in their hands, and how much they owed to those who had already lost theirs.

* * *

><p><strong><em>Byaku-Shinkyou<em>**

**_Hokkaido Prefecture_**

**_3:15pm_**

In the grand courtyard, beneath a cold sun and nippy winter breeze, fifty young men stood in five rows of ten, dressed splendidly in brand new uniforms signifying their 'graduation' of sorts. It had been a long year of intensive training and examinations, and now it was finally time to spend the next six or so months on the final leg of their journey to becoming elite watchdogs.

There was no need to tell these fresh faces that the kissing-up to their superiors was to begin today, and as they went through the rituals of marching and displaying their skills, they were more than aware of the silent scrutiny from those in much higher positions. It wasn't everyday that Lord Orochimaru himself came out to watch a new class being inducted, but today, he sat on his 'throne' with an expression that was a little difficult to decipher. One couldn't tell if he was impressed with what he was watching or simply bored at the yearly routine. After all, by the end of the training on the grounds, more than half of these wannabes would quit with their tails between their legs.

For three young men in particular, the journey to this stage of their lives was no easy decision to make. When their leader had asked who was willing to volunteer the next year or two of their lives to becoming members of the watchdogs, no one had raised their hand to accept the challenge. Sure it was tempting, and the idea of dressing up in that cool outfit and being able to prance around with a feeling of importance was appetizing, but this was the very group they were supposed to be rebelling against!

"We need spies within the grounds," was the basic reason given for this radical decision, and after gnawing on his lower lip (and fingers) in thought, Suigetsu Hōzuki had stood up. What the hell, he had reasoned with a grin. He might as well be productive for the next few months and go through the stupid rigmarole of becoming an officer. And he was always up for a challenge anyway, though he failed to confess that the _real_ reason behind his decision to sign up was at the opportunity to finally wield a sword _legally_. He had assumed he'd be the only one going, but to his surprise, the big guy (who was usually quiet 99.9% of the time during meetings but could turn into a homicidal maniac during missions) had stood up as well. Jūgo was his name, and he had admitted that he had a close relationship to one of the superior officers there, though they hadn't seen each other in years. The third person to sign up had been even more of a surprise, for he usually didn't like to work with others (read as Suigetsu) unless absolutely necessary. Kiba Inuzuka had proven himself to be a loyal fighter, but his real skills came in reconnaissance and spying.

And so with the three-man team assembled, Itachi had given his instructions, which they were to follow to a T. For starters, the three men were dispersed from their Tokyo headquarters; each to move to a new town and register as strangers, so there would be no way of knowing all three were in cohorts. The goal was to work and study as hard as possible, so all three could get into the same graduating class.

Goal accomplished.

And now – almost one year later - as they stood before their new leader/boss, Suigetsu couldn't help stealing quick glances at his 'comrades' he hadn't seen in a while. Kiba stood at the furthest line from him, and Jūgo was at the back, mostly due to his height, but Suigetsu had to resist grinning all the same. Wouldn't the gang at the base be shocked to see them wearing the uniform of the watchdogs? It was almost a blasphemy and yet sweet revenge in a way.

_Destroy from the inside out._

Heh. It was going to be too much fun. However, his only regret was never getting to see the famous ex-first captain, Uchiha Sasuke, in the flesh. Goodness knew he had a lot to say to that pompous prick, even if he was the younger brother to his beloved leader.

Kimimaro, for his part, had thought he was seeing things when he read through the list of new officers. The name Jūgo wasn't exactly unusual, but it was seeing the blank space next to it, that made him wonder if it could possibly be the same kid he had grown up with back in his hometown. Only one person he knew would never write his family's last name on any document just because he had been an orphan.

_No…it couldn't be possible, could it?_

And yet as they had marched into the courtyard earlier, Kimimaro had almost lost his balance as he gawked at the orange-haired man, who had only gotten bigger, (which was an understatement) since the last time he saw him. How old had they been at the time? Twelve? Thirteen? Whatever the case, Jūgo had been his best and closest friend while growing up, and to see him here now - all these years later - had filled the officer's heart with a happiness he had not felt in an eternity.

He did his best to keep his expression as blank and neutral as possible, not even daring to give a smile as he stood before Jūgo to inspect him. He was more than aware of Orochimaru's hawk-eye attention given at this time, for this was almost always the moment when his master chose the fairest of the new recruits to become his 'personal guards' (bed warmers). Kimimaro knew Jūgo wouldn't make the cut; not because he wasn't handsome, but due to his towering height and somewhat slow disposition when not angered. He always gave the illusion of not being all that smart, but Kimimaro knew otherwise; for memories of the countless hours spent in the forest, where Jūgo seemed to know the name of every bird, animal, and plant, had impressed him greatly. In fact, those precious quiet moments with Jūgo were some of the best memories of his childhood.

He was proud of the big man for coming this far, and goodness knew he couldn't wait to catch up with his long lost friend. Besides, it would more than make up for the void left behind after Haku's defection. It still angered him (a little) that his thoughts would sometimes drift to the young man with the cheerful smile and seemingly innocent disposition. Perhaps taking in Haku had been his way of compensating for his decision to leave Jūgo behind and to find a better life for himself with Orochimaru, but Haku's betrayal had hurt him more than he would care to admit. He found himself wondering if Haku was all right wherever he was. If nothing else, his one last wish was to see the boy again, to remind him of who had cared for him in his darkest days, before slitting his throat.

"You seem keen on the big one," Orochimaru drawled as Kimimaro walked up the steps to stand beside him. "Someone you know?"

"He looks familiar, but no," Kimimaro lied easily while pretending to read through the scroll. He could still feel Orochimaru's gaze on him, but after being with the man for so long, Kimimaro had learned how to mask his real emotions effectively.

"No one here looks promising," Orochimaru finally complained with a dramatic sigh. The officers were now being made to parade around the courtyard again; a final march before they would be delegated to their new quarters. "However, I need to build up my army as quickly as possible." He closed his eyes and seemed to reflect on something. "There is a war coming on."

"A war, my Lord?" Kimimaro asked in bemusement.

A cold smirk came to the pale lips before he lifted his lashes slowly. "Yes, indeed. Can you not smell it in the air? Japan is swelling with anger and rage, and one day it will self-destruct in the most spectacular way possible. An explosion of epic proportions you could say."

Kimimaro said nothing, though his gaze drifted towards the sturdy, towering mountains that always watched over them like silent judges. He felt something flare through him; an emotion he was not too familiar with. Was that fear? Or just a case of not knowing what awaited them beyond the gates and walls that were supposed to 'protect' them? He lowered his gaze to the new recruits, and this time felt a jolt as those familiar brown eyes met his and held steady for a long moment. During the inspection, Jūgo had acted as if he did not know him, and Kimimaro did have to admit it hurt a little (perhaps Jūgo had forgotten about him). However, seeing those lips quirk into a barely noticeable smile filled his heart with that warmth again that brought a flush to his cheeks.

So he _did_ remember after all!

His moment of happiness, however, was shattered as an officer walked up to them with a delivery; the familiar white scroll that, no doubt, contained information from the outside. Kimimaro stiffened as Orochimaru unrolled it quickly. The news was probably not exactly good for Orochimaru's brows had formed a scowl and his features were darkening by the second.

"Kimimaro," he barked coldly.

He straightened up immediately; aware that the time for reminiscing would have to be put by the way side. "Yes, my Lord."

"Shimura Danzo seems to take me for a fool."

"My Lord?" came the bemused query.

"Set up a meeting with the following members of the LDP. I plan to host a feast for them this weekend. See to it that they have no other option but to attend, and while you're at it, find me a capable officer who will be making a little excursion for me."

"Excursion?"

Orochimaru raised a brow as if dealing with a child. "Yes, my dear dolt of an assistant. Find me a capable officer that can make a long distance trip. I think we just might have our first lead of where our precious renegade crew now resides." He rose from his chair, causing every officer in the courtyard to salute in respect at his departure. However, he stopped long enough to tap Kimimaro's shoulder with the scroll. "Ah, and before I forget, send the new recruit with the silver hair to my quarters. He will do for tonight."

"Yes, my Lord."

With Orochimaru's departure, it was left to him to congratulate the new recruits, wish them the best of luck, and have them dismissed. And though he carried out these functions automatically, his head and heart now throbbed with the revelation he had just heard.

There was a lead; a _possible_ lead, and there was only one person he could think of willing to make such a trip on such short notice. Said officer hadn't been to Byaku-Shinkyou in a few years, but a phone call ought to do the trick.

Soon he would have Haku within his grasp again, and this time, Kaguya Kimimaro was determined not to make the same mistake twice.

* * *

><p>Sasuke was not in the best of moods.<p>

In fact, it was safe to say his tolerance to deal with anyone's bullshit - especially Jae Weong, who seemed to have a problem understanding the enormity of the situation – was at an all time low. After Shikamaru's announcement, he had left the room (forgetting his crutch until Haku had run out to hand it to him), nearly pounded the elevator buttons until they broke, cursed the elevator for being so damn slow, and when he eventually got to the lobby downstairs, Jae Weong was nowhere to be found. Haku, who had followed, had gone around to search for the elusive landlord, but besides the old lady sleeping in the hallway, and the two children playing with a soccer ball outside amidst roaming chickens, there was still no sign of the older man.

Shikamaru, Karin, and Naruto showed up minutes later – just in time too or Sasuke might have begun yelling out for Jae. Without saying a word, Shikamaru led them through the cramped office, past a door they hadn't really noticed before, and into a much darker (but wider) room that was filled with even more junk.

"This is where I take my calls," he said as he led them past shelves filled with files, cardboard boxes and handy tools/equipment. There was a thick layer of dust in some places, creating a smell that was a mingle of wet stone and aged paper. A lone grimy window let in little light and was barely open to get in some fresh air. Haku and Karin had to swipe away cobwebs as they walked, but they eventually made out the two small tables and four wooden chairs that surrounded it. Sitting upon the tables were actually three telephones connected to a dizzying mishmash of wires they had to be careful not to trip over. There were also several notepads (some of which were filled with meaningless scribbles) and an old soup can containing writing materials to be used. On a shelf adjacent to the tables, sat a small television also coated with dust. However, it was the radio beside it that was quite impressive. It wasn't just any ordinary radio, but it was the kind that was used in the past, where you had to wear a set of headphones and turn dials to listen to messages being sent from distant places. It didn't look as dusty; an obvious sign that it was probably still being used to this day. Was that how Jae Weong kept in touch with his brother overseas?

"Do you know the number to where your girlfriend is?" Sasuke queried impatiently as he eyed Shikamaru and a phone simultaneously.

Shikamaru shook his head. "It's an undisclosed location with a line that's not traceable. She can only call me and not vice versa."

"Fuck," Sasuke muttered while running his hands through his hair and sending it into even more of a frazzled mess than it already was. He noticed Naruto was already settling into a chair and dragging a phone toward him – what he had planned to do in the first place, but somehow seeing the blond taking the initiative was making him even more pissed off.

"What do you think you're doing?"

Naruto held up a piece of paper, while cradling the phone between his shoulder and neck. He began to dial the numbers written on it. "We want to get information, right? Jae's gone…so we are basically on our own for now."

"Yes, but _who_ are you calling?" came the barely-snapped question.

Naruto ignored him and looked to Karin and Shikamaru. "This line is safe, yeah?"

"So far," Shikamaru agreed. "But I'm with Sasuke in this one. Who are you calling? We can't just go about calling anyone we like -"

"It's an old friend of my father's," Naruto replied with a small smile. "He should be able to hel -"

"Hey! What you all doing in here?" came the sudden bellow that had Karin nearly giving a squeal of surprise and the males, spinning around at the intrusion. It was Jae, and he looked a little frazzled himself, though it seemed he was either just stepping out of the shower or soaked with sweat. He hastily tucked in his shirt into his pants and shuffled toward them with a raised brow. "Ah, this will teach me to lock the door before leaving…"

"We want information," Sasuke clipped tightly. "We just heard word that an Akatsuki base was bombed and I want to know if my brother is all right."

"He fine, he fine," Jae replied with a wave of his hand in dismissal. "In fact, I just got off phone with him at my place." He gave a smile at the visible sigh of relief that seemed to go through everyone…except for Sasuke who was still as tense as a bowstring. "You not believe me?"

"Can I speak to him?"

"Yes. I went upstairs to see you all and to tell you that he will call you in about thirty minutes." Jae shook his head; looking aghast. "Imagine my surprise when I go up there and no one is there. I nearly shit my pants as you say."

Naruto chuckled and dropped the receiver. "Sorry, man. We were all just so worried. Shika's girlfriend made it seem like all hell had broken lose back home."

Jae shrugged and motioned for them to sit while dragging an extra chair for Haku, who was perfectly fine with standing beside his master.

"You just wait…call will come. Phone number 2." He pointed to the black one in the middle (it was the only black one as the others were beige). "As soon as it ring…" He nodded to Shikamaru to finish the rest.

"As soon as it rings, you hear nothing at first," Shikamaru explained. "You have to press seven and the star key, say the following code." He reach for a pen and piece of paper, scribbled out what it was and passed it around. "And then it connects you through. Got it?"

They nodded in unison and settled back to play the waiting game…which was agonizing in itself. Jae had luckily, turned on the television, but had to fidget with the antenna because the pictures weren't exactly clear. He was wise enough to keep the volume at its lowest, so it wouldn't interrupt the conversation. Not that it was worth the trouble as the television only seemed to have stations that focused on either kid programs or silly game shows. The one serious program turned out to be a documentary about a newly-built hospital in the downtown area.

_Yawn._

Sasuke kept his gaze firmly on the phone as if hoping it would perhaps ring with the just the power of his eyes or something ridiculous like that. He ignored Karin's gentle squeeze of his shoulder; resisting the urge to shrug it off in annoyance at how patronizing she was being. A part of him felt he wasn't really being fair, since she was only trying to comfort him, but in his current mindset, he just couldn't relax until he heard Itachi and heard the truth directly from him. He knew he shouldn't have bought Shikamaru's story, and yet the initial shock that had coursed through him at the notion of losing his brother (all over again!) had galvanized him action. There had simply been no time to think, and as ludicrous as it might have been, Sasuke was sure he would have probably found a way to get onto the next boat going to Japan. All he had heard in his head was a painful drumming sound that made his eyes sting and tear up a little. He knew he wasn't about to burst into tears, but it was a blinding headache all the same.

Words could not describe the rush of relief that went through him at Jae's reassurance that Itachi was still alive and well. His knees had nearly buckled, but thankful for the crutch to keep him steady, he had saved himself the embarrassment of showing his weakness. But still, he wasn't going to be satisfied until he was sure Itachi was truly all right. Until then –

_What are they doing?_

He managed to finally tear his gaze away from the phone to notice Haku had left his position behind him to crouch beside Naruto's chair. They were both looking at something Haku was holding cupped within his palms and as they leaned closer to each other to examine it, Sasuke felt something hard settle within the pit of his stomach as Naruto's words came back to haunt him.

/You're attracted to him? /

/Well…if he was a girl…/

/So if he was a girl, you'd be with him? /

/No doubt. I like the guy. /

He captured his lower lip between his teeth as they chuckled/giggled over whatever it was they were looking at, while absently rubbing his stomach to ease the knot forming there. He didn't care. Of course he didn't care. Naruto was too stupid to realize just how mixed up he was when it came to his relationships with other people (male or female), and it wasn't up to him to make that decision for the blond. Let him sweat it out himself until he figures out what he _really_ wants.

Although…

"Haku," he called out in what he hoped wasn't too snappish or irritated a tone. They really didn't have to be that close to each other, did they?

"Yes, Sasuke-sama?" Haku looked up with that same innocuous smile on his face. "Did you need something?"

_Yes, to stop breathing down his fucking neck._

Sasuke – now aware that Naruto was watching him as well – ignored him as best he could and nodded toward his crutch. "Could you help me place this against the wall there?"

"I could have done that for you," Karin chimed in.

"It's okay, I can do it," Haku replied immediately as he rose to his feet (for the last thing he needed was for Karin to begin doing everything for his master), but not before motioning for Naruto to hold out his hands so he could place the 'thing' in there. Sasuke caught the flutter of wings and realized that Haku had somehow caught either a moth or butterfly in this underground bunker of sorts. It was now under the blond's protection apparently, and said blond now had a knowing smirk on his lips that caused Sasuke's cheeks to flame in awareness.

_Like hell, I'll let you hog him to yourself,_ Sasuke thought in frustrated anger, but that dissipated quickly as the sudden harsh ring of the phone nearly sent them all jumping in surprise.

"Holy shit, that's loud," Naruto breathed while Sasuke reached out to pick up the receiver. He followed Shikamaru's instructions with his heart racing at a mile a minute, and just when he thought he would never hear the other voice…

"Sasuke?"

Sasuke really did have to hold back his emotions this time by biting down even harder on his lip and gripping the receiver until his knuckles turned white. Never had that voice sounded so good and welcoming to him at this time.

"Use the speaker, so we can all hear him," Naruto suggested, and before Sasuke could even agree to it, the blond had pressed the appropriate button to hail out in greeting.

"Itachi! How are you?"

Sasuke glared in annoyance at Naruto's antics, but when everyone else began to pester his brother with questions, and Itachi could only chuckle weakly at the other end while begging them to give him some time to breathe, he lowered the receiver back into its place and tried to relax.

"I'm really glad to hear you are all doing well," Itachi said with a smile in his voice. "It's so good to hear your voices again."

"Us too," Karin admitted. "How is everything? We heard the news from Temari about a bombing? What's going on?"

"Shisui and I are fine, but…Temari is right. It's not really a base of ours, but rather…" He began to recount the incidents taking place in different parts of the country, and just how volatile things were becoming. The five of them listened with pensive expressions; Karin worrying her lip, Haku with hands clasped before him and his eyes filling with unshed tears, Shikamaru with his head lowered though his hands were forming tight fists on his lap, Naruto with his chin resting on the table with an unreadable expression in his eyes, and Sasuke with a frown and a tight clenching of his jaw.

Japan was a powder keg just waiting to explode.

"I need not tell you that for your best interest, you have to remain there and begin training, because you might be coming home sooner than you think," Itachi stated. "Naruto…are you still there?"

"Yeah, I am…"

"You especially," Itachi said gravely. "I hate to have to put you on the spot with this, but we felt it was best you make the decision on what you want to do when it comes to Danzo. I spoke to Dr. Woo and he says your shoulder is just about healed. You just have to work on strengthening your muscles again…well your entire body…and if you say yes, I'll make plans to send you back to Japan where you can meet up with Danzo. It's all up to you how you want to go about this."

Naruto lowered his lashes. His heart was a jackhammer within his chest. His palms were sweaty, and his tongue felt like a heavy lump within his mouth. Danzo was on a personal hunt for him now. Danzo wanted him to be the one to take out Ikegami if possible, and what better way to get closer to the _kumichō_ of the Syndicate than accepting the offer. It would be so easy to say "yes" and get it over and done with, but he needed more time to think…and to call Jiraiya for advice. As well as…

He lifted his lashes, and this time, met the dark inscrutable ones across him. Sasuke wasn't exactly giving him any visible signals, but Naruto felt he ought to speak to this guy about things first for some inexplicable reason.

_It would mean leaving him…all of them…and setting out on my own…_

"If you're worried about being alone in this,"' Itachi said to break through his thoughts. "You do not have to worry. I have a group of fine young men and women like yourself willing to help you in whatever capacity. We might be hated by the masses, but we still have those who believe in the cause and will fight until justice prevails. They will be your allies."

Naruto expelled a soft _whoosh_ of air from pursed lips.

"Gimme a couple of days to think it over," he finally said aloud. An audible soft sob had him looking up to notice that Haku had actually been crying silently. Naruto felt something warm surge within his heart at the idea that someone actually gave a shit about whether he left or not, and resisted the urge to burst out the waterworks as well. He sat up and took a deep breath, while smiling warmly at Haku. "Yeah…just give me about a week to come up with my final decision, is that okay?"

"That's fine with me," Itachi agreed. "This is not a decision you have to rush into after all. How are the blueprints coming along?"

"Great!" Karin replied with much enthusiasm. "They are really fantastic, Itachi. You really ought to see them. Speaking of which, when will you be coming back for a visit?"

"When it's safe, and I put that word in quotations, enough to come over," Itachi confessed. "There are still a lot of loose ends we have to finish up here, but until then, I want you all to find the time to relax and enjoy yourselves for a while. You should be able to leave the apartment now and go for a little sightseeing every now and then, eh?"

There was a collective murmur of agreement or discord – one couldn't tell – but Itachi insisted. "I hate to be pessimistic, but you should really enjoy your freedom now while you have it. Get healthy, see the sights and sounds, and return with a sound heart and mind. You cannot enter battle with any other mentality. Does that make sense?"

"Yes, _sensei_! We plan to party like it's the end of the world!" Naruto cried with a mock wave of his hands as if in a classroom. This earned chuckles from everyone and a reluctant smile from Sasuke.

"Well, I'm glad to hear it," Itachi stated. "Now, if you all don't mind…I'd like to speak to my brother alone for a few minutes..."

"What?" Naruto teased. "Whatever you've got to tell him, you can tell us too." He grinned at Sasuke, who lifted his middle finger in salute and mouthed the words 'get out of here already!' For that, he got a swipe at the back of his head when Naruto and the others began to leave the room. He spun around to protest, and got a childish raspberry blown his way before the door slammed to leave him in blissful peace and quiet.

"That bastard," he muttered beneath his breath, though it was hard to stay pissed considering just how silly being blown a raspberry was in the first place. He couldn't remember the last time he had seen or done such a thing…maybe to Itachi when he was a child.

"Was that a raspberry?" Itachi asked with a chuckle.

"Yeah…guess who did it?"

He could literally hear Itachi grinning on the other end. "Well, at least I'm glad you two seem to be getting along."

"…"

"Sasuke?"

"What?"

"You two _are_ getting along, aren't you?"

_I have a hickey on my neck and I'm somewhat jealous that he seems to like my servant more than me, but otherwise…_

"We're cordial," he said aloud, though he was unaware of absently caressing his neck. "We're almost done with the blueprints. Been working nonstop for the past three days, and I think I'm even beginning to dream of lines and blocks." He sighed and closed his eyes. "To be honest…it's like I don't even know the place anymore, _nii-san_. _You_ wouldn't even recognize it anymore. Orochimaru has fucked things up so bad, it's pathetic. Father would be rolling...if he isn't already...in his grave."

(and I stood by and let it all happen)

He spoke of all the changes in architecture, including the numerous additions Orochimaru had overseen since he came into power. He described as best he could the changes noted in Naruto and Shikamaru's drawings, so much so that even as Itachi tried to sketch them out on his side, he couldn't reconcile the Byaku-Shinkyou he had known as a child to what Sasuke was describing to him now.

"It's going to be tricky getting in there without being noticed now," Sasuke admitted.

"Not to worry much," Itachi replied. "We have three new recruits just admitted into the place. Jūgo, Inuzuka Kiba, and Hōzuki Suigetsu."

_Hōzuki?_ Sasuke frowned. Why did that name sound familiar?

"Ah, that's true, isn't it?" Itachi said with a snap of his fingers. "His older brother…Suigetsu's I mean…was arrested and sent to Byaku-Shinkyou a few years back, wasn't he? Hōzuki Mangetsu was his name, I believe."

"Ah…him…"

_Damn it._

"I don't believe he made it out alive," Itachi finished quietly, causing Sasuke to groan inwardly and close his eyes. Of course he hadn't. The Hōzuki that was sentenced to Gudan had been responsible for several meaningless deaths across the country. At the time, the bloodthirsty bastard had deserved to go through the purification rites, and if this Suigetsu was anything like the elder…

"Suigetsu is harmless…for the most part," Itachi reassured him quietly. "So yes, he probably will want to kick your ass if you ever meet, but other than that, he really hates Orochimaru and will do anything to help us bring him down. So if you ever do see each other, please allow him to vent a little until he's satisfied, eh?"

"Thanks a lot, _nii-san_," Sasuke replied as sarcastically as he could muster. "If I show up in a body bag, be prepared to take responsibility."

After suffering through Itachi's teasing, they chatted for a few more minutes about life in both places – that had nothing to do with deaths or destruction – until Itachi had to leave to attend to other matters.

"Remember to take care of yourself," he advised again with worry in his tone. "Dr. Woo says the wound is healing nicely, so in a week or so, you should be able to begin more strenuous training, yes?"

"I hope so," Sasuke agreed as he eyed his leg with an inner sigh. He pounded the thigh with a fist. The idea of being stuck here waiting for this to heal while Naruto leaves to begin his fight…

"Sasuke?"

"Hmm?"

"You okay?"

"…yes…why do you ask?"

"You gave a pretty depressed-sounding sigh there."

"I want to get better, that's all," he said, though he knew it was really more than that. If Naruto left then…then…

(_I might never see him again_)

And he hated the way his heart seemed to tighten at the very idea of that happening. Good grief, but this was worse than he imagined.

"Sasuke? Are you…?"

"I should go," he croaked thickly and shook his head. "I'm sure you have a lot to do as well. Just…try to keep in touch more often, okay?"

"I will," Itachi promised. "Goodbye dearest little brother. I shall miss you now and until we meet again."

Sasuke had the grace to flush at the term of endearment and flowery sentimental farewell. "Shut up," he murmured and hung up before he made a fool of himself.

However, he still couldn't get himself to move, for his mind was a jumbled mass of conflicting thoughts that eventually had him lowering his head to the table, groaning in misery and closing his eyes. How he wished everything could go back to the way it used to be.

When something soft fluttered onto his finger, he lifted his lashes wearily to see it was the damn moth (thought it sort of looked like a monarch butterfly). Sasuke's initial instinct was to flick it off, but as it continued to flap its wings gently – not even seeming to care that it was perched on a human – Sasuke sighed and studied it absently.

Moths or butterflies deserved to fly, didn't they? They deserved their freedom, didn't they? What would happen if he snapped those wings apart? Why it would cripple the insect, wouldn't it? How many wings had he clipped away in his life so far? How many had been denied the right to freedom at his hands? Suigetsu Hōzuki would just have to join the extremely long queue of those who had a beef to grind with him especially with the person who was currently leading the damn queue.

"If you're looking for him," Sasuke whispered to the moth/butterfly (still couldn't make up his damn mind about which it was). "He's gone…and he'll be gone soon…as it was meant to be anyway…"

When this whole thing was over, they would go their separate ways after all. Nothing lasts forever. Not even 'cordial' friendships.

He blew the moth/butterfly away gently, but to his chagrin, it returned to perch on his finger again. "Look, I can't take care of you," Sasuke said with a sigh of exasperation. "Go fly back to your nest or wherever the fuck you came from…"

He began to shake it off, when the door flew open as if the very hounds of hell had come seeking a new target.

"You didn't kill it, did you?" were the first words out of the blond's lips as he ran up to the table with widened eyes. "Haku's been whining about me forgetting it…" He finally stopped talking as he noticed the insect on Sasuke's finger. The panic on his visage eased into a smile that had Sasuke shaking his head in immediate denial.

"I wasn't bringing it up to…"

"You're so nice to take care of it for us, eh? Here…hand it over."

"It won't budge," Sasuke muttered in embarrassment. "I keep trying to shake it off and it won't leave me alone."

Naruto stooped to his haunches until he was eye level with Sasuke's hand. His only goal was to get the butterfly, and without really thinking much about it, he clasped Sasuke's hand gently within his left and with his right, plucked off the insect with a tenderness that was surprising to the dark-haired man.

(don't stare at his lips...do not stare at them and wish they were on your skin again. do not acknowledge the tingle creeping up your arm with the way he's holding you, neither must you focus too much on how his hand feels...slightly hardened with all the work he's been doing...yet somehow soft...and those eyes...if you look into them he will _know_...he will _tell_ that all this time, you've just been...)

"There…" Naruto whispered as the butterfly settled upon the back of his hand. "See? I'm not such a meanie like the other guy."

"Let…" Sasuke swallowed; turning crimson for he felt his hand tremble within Naruto's. "You can release me now."

"Huh?" Naruto looked up in bemusement, for a long second, hardly aware of exactly what Sasuke was complaining about now...except finding himself so damn close to him again...especially after that odd discussion about Haku and the sudden, burning, searing recollection of tasting...kissing...sucking...licking that slightly salty sweet skin and how those eyes were so dark and deep set and...

(you're still holding his goddamn hand!)

"Ah…sor…sorry," he stuttered; dropping the hand so fast, you'd assume it was on fire. With a slight shake of his head, he rose to his feet quickly and began to back away. "I'll…eh…go give this back to Haku. See…see ya."

He was out of the room before Sasuke could form another coherent response, but it was enough. For those few nearly heart-stopping minutes where his hand had been touched with a tenderness he had not felt in a while, and where he had just witnessed a softer side of Uzumaki Naruto - was more than enough for one day.

With a barely concealed groan of agony, he laid his aching head upon the desk, and squeezed his eyes shut in weary resignation.

_What the hell do I do now, nii-san? Just what the hell am I supposed to do?_


	26. 26: Fireworks

Thank you, thank you to you lovely folks **alessia, silversauce, NarutoUno2, roro237, ThroughDarknessandLight, Opalynne,** and **xxLoveless19xx** for your comments! I figured the last chapter was a lot of information to get through, so maybe this one will 'relax' your brains a little, eh? *lol*

Enjoy! And know as always that your comments are very much appreciated and get the muses a-going!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 26:<strong>

**Fireworks**

_See how clear and bright  
>Is the moonlight finding ways<br>Through the riven clouds  
>That, with drifting autumn wind,<br>Gracefully float in the sky._

_**-Fujiwara no Akisuke**_

* * *

><p><em>Naruto: <em>

_One hundred and one...one hundred and two...one hundred and three...one hundred and four..._

She wasn't as I expected.

_...one hundred and five...one hundred and six..._

It's not as if Shikamaru had given me much to go by whenever I prodded him to describe the love of his life. He'd only say she was the most beautiful human being he had ever met. I guess looking back now; I'm assuming he meant 'inner beauty'.

_...one hundred and seven...one hundred and eight...one hundred and nine..._

Don't get me wrong. She's not ugly. Far from it. She's just not what I expected that's all. My overactive imagination had pictured a brunette with a body that just wouldn't quit. She'd be somewhat flirty though kinda serious since Shikamaru was like that most of the time. However, he could put on the lazy act every once in a while, especially when he didn't want to do anything (like say cleaning our apartment when it was his turn), so I assumed his woman would be handy around the house too.

_...hundred and twelve...hundred and thirteen..._

I, at least, got the handy part right because so far, she's proven to be quite efficient with the cleaning. Secondly, Temari wasn't a brunette, but a (dirty) blonde who seemed to favor putting her hair in four weird ponytails, so if you looked at her from afar, you'd think she had put her hand in an electric socket and hadn't quite recovered from the shock. She wasn't that tall, but her figure was full in all the right places and like Haku, she seemed to favor wearing kimonos. Her features were plain, and I don't mean that in a disrespectful way. I mean that nothing about it really stood out except for maybe her eyes. They were a really pale blue, which were pretty when she did smile – and boy! did she smile (and laugh) like a giddy school girl once she caught sight of her man.

_...hundred and sixteen...hundred and seventeen...hundred and eighteen..._

You should have seen them and their uncharacteristic gushy mushy reunion. Even now, I can't help chuckling at the memory of that evening, though the dull pangs of jealousy and envy still cause my heart to ache...but anyway, to see Shikamaru in that state was quite interesting to say the least. I genuinely felt happy for the guy, because all things considered, he hadn't really gotten a chance to be with her for over two years. Sure there were the Byaku-Shinkyou visits, but since her accident, the couple had barely seen each other. Watching them jump into each other's arms and begin to talk at the same time – neither one letting the other get through a complete sentence – brought back bittersweet memories of my happier times with Sakura.

…_hundred and twenty…hundred and twenty-one…hundred and twenty-two…_

Shit. Shouldn't be thinking about her anymore, should I? Why go through the agony of reliving the heartbreak and betrayal afterwards? For despite my desperate attempts to latch on to the great times, those darker moments would still creep in. Ever mocking. Ever taunting. Anyway, Shika moved out of the apartment the night before she arrived, and like the lovesick bastard he is, he actually convinced Karin, Haku and I to help redecorate Itachi's former apartment in a way to make his woman feel more comfortable. You should see the place now. Karin added some pretty window dressings. Haku helped with the flowers. The coffee table had a nice lace cloth with some fancy Japanese décor on it. The once bare walls now had some cheap but colorful-looking paintings. The kitchen and restroom was as spotless as possible, and I even helped air dry and beat the dust out of the futon before making it all nice and neat for them with new cotton sheets and pillows. By the time we were through, it looked like a newlywed couple's home! Man, was I burning with envy then.

…_hundred and twenty-eight…hundred and twenty-nine…_

Temari approved. In fact, she approved so much; we didn't get to see the couple for almost two days after her arrival. Those lovebirds locked themselves away in the 'Honeymoon Suite', and it was clear that the rest of us _losers_ were not to bother them unless there was a goddamn fire in the building. Heh, at least they were nice enough to stop for the little welcome party we had in Karin's apartment earlier in the evening. Good food, good wine (though I noticed Sasuke didn't touch any of the alcoholic beverages…and didn't talk much either now that I think of it, but I guess I should be used to that by now), good conversation, and I came to reluctantly like the girl that would be stealing my buddy away from me.

A part of me wanted to find fault and perhaps bring down Shika a peg or two from his romantic high, but Temari was proving me wrong in all aspects. She was smart, and from her brief backstory, it was clear she was just as tough as Karin when it came to defending herself. It was how she and Shika met in the first place. She had been a _kenjutsu_ instructor at a local dojo, where Shikamaru visited often and eventually fell head over heels for the tough-talking chick. Shika confessed that she turned him down several times until he became so frustrated, he literally told her to her face, that she was nothing but a pain-in-the-ass. Hah! Guess that finally got her interested and she eventually became the pursuer. Maybe I should use that as my next tactic to get a new girlfriend…

…_hundred and thirty-two…hundred and thirty-three…hundred and thirty-four…_

But then again, I don't think I'm as suave as Shika. I might end up getting punched in the face if I ever said something like that.

…_hundred and thirty-five…_

This of course brings me to the last time I got punched in the face and not by a girl either.

…_hundred and thirty-six…_

Hard to believe it's been almost two weeks since that incident happened; a cause for self-congratulation. The truce/cordial agreement seems to working out fine so far….except for those brief, inexplicable moments when I find myself feeling a little 'weird/out-of-sorts' whenever I'm close to that guy. Like the time I went back to get the butterfly for Haku (which was later released in a very melodramatic way. I really do need to lay Haku off the Korean T.V. dramas).

So, back to Sasuke –

I mean, for starters, I wasn't expecting him to be playing with the damn thing (can you imagine that guy dealing with such an insect anyway? I was sure he would have begun plucking its wings or burning them for fun). Anyway, talk about getting that flustered feeling – like the time after I gave him the hickey – hitting me all over again. I can't begin to tell you how much it really sucks to have to keep experiencing the same emotions I get whenever I see a girl I really like, when we get that close. I just don't get it. I mean, I'm technically 'fine' when I'm not near him and others are in the vicinity, but get us all alone, and _bam!_ my tongue suddenly feels heavy in my mouth and my stomach begins to tighten as if I'm about to get a cramp of epic proportions. It's getting worse now…especially at nights because I don't have Shika as a buffer anymore. Temari's been here for five days already, and so far, I've managed to talk to Shika only _once_, and by 'talk', I mean a decent conversation and not just saying 'hi' as we're prone to do these days.

Goddamn it.

…_hundred and forty…hundred and forty-one…hundred and forty-two…_

With Shika gone, the apartment now seems much bigger and lonelier. Considering I've always been a loner anyway, it just felt odd not having him next me to with his light snores or seeing him still reading when I'm about to call it a night. I try not to imagine him making out with his girlfriend (which is gross anyway to be imagining such a thing), and so I attempt to keep 'busy' with my magazines. However my hand, a bottle of lotion and tissues can only do so much. I try to get into it, and after ten minutes of mindless stroking, the images of the girls blur on the pages before me, and I give up.

(well…not really)

…_hundred and forty-five…hundred and forty-six…_

It's really embarrassing to admit this, but last night…well...let's just say that my mindless strokes took a life of their own. This wasn't really a conscious thing, as in I didn't set out to really think about him per se, but it happened that one particular photograph of the 'model' eerily reminded me of a certain someone. Maybe it was the haircut or how pale her skin was or that she was kinda flat-chested and almost tomboyish, or that she was actually posing on a black leather couch with nothing more than a fancy _katana_ cradled between her spread thighs for 'clothing'. So you can probably see how and why things got a little out of hand (no pun intended).

_...hundred and fifty...hundred and fifty-one...hundred and fifty-two..._

_Damn_ if that picture didn't have me doing a double take and actually squeezing my eyes shut for a minute to be sure I hadn't just hallucinated things. However, opening my eyes didn't make it any better. If Sasuke had a twin sister, she would fit the role damn well, and the more I thought about her as Sasuke's _sister_, the harder and more turned on I became. Between the model's face and Sasuke's mug creeping in every now and then, I was a complete mess when I finally came. Biting hard into my pillow, tears springing to my eyes, my heart pounding so hard I felt it was going to fall right out of my chest, my head spinning, and the world wheezing by at a dizzying rate. I had to admit that it was the _best_ orgasm I've ever experienced while taking care of business. However, it would take wild horses to get me to admit that _he_ was the one responsible for it. It was the girl, that's all, and I'm sticking to that story.

_...hundred and fifty-six...hundred and fifty-seven..._

Jerking off to Sasuke's twin sister's image and dealing with the non-existent Shikamaru aside, I've finally begun the first stages of my training. The main goal; getting my body back into shape. Though I've added much needed weight since we left Byaku-Shinkyou, I realized I had trouble climbing up the flight of stairs to our floor – on the day of our phone call with Itachi – without panting like a steam engine on its last legs. I had chosen the stairs to test myself, and the results were pretty much abysmal. Hence, my morning regiment included jogging up the stairs (12 floors in all) early in the morning, and then working on my shoulders with the exercise band and dumbbells later. At the moment, I'm doing stomach crunches on the rooftop; my goal to reach two hundred before I call it a day. My stomach muscles are already taut from the continuous exercise of the past three days and my body is slowly getting used to the rigorous work-out I'm putting it through.

_...hundred and sixty-one...hundred and sixty-two...hundred and sixty-three..._

Although it's just mid-morning, I am already slick with sweat. I had long taken off my shirt to allow the cool breeze to bathe my heated flesh every once in a while. The mat below me is getting a little slippery, but I can't stop for a break now. Would hate to lose my rhythm or counting place for that matter. Though Jae Weong had shown us the building's gym, which in all honesty was nothing more than a shadow of its former self as the only equipments left were a few weights and an archaic-looking treadmill. It was a wonder that the thing still worked. The room wasn't exactly large, and from the musty smell and dust accumulation, we had a feeling no one had visited it in a while. Its walls had been painted a sickly beige color and there were a few cracks here and there (don't even get me started on the condition of the roof). One side of the wall was covered with mirrors, so you could see yourself while you worked out, I guess. There were two windows for light and air, and they didn't look like they had been cleaned since the building was opened for business. A television set, that didn't work, sat on a high jutting wooden shelf against the wall. However, there was an old school boombox which played some funky, upbeat Korean music to keep one company. Jae said the room was ours to use at will, but I figured I'd stick to my running up and down the stairs, while Sasuke could use the treadmill and weights for himself. It worked out pretty good that way, because he could train with Karin and Haku helping him, while I did my own thing. I preferred to be outside anyway. It gave me more time to not only work out, but to think on all the things Itachi had said as well as the rather brief but encouraging conversation I finally had with Jiraiya.

_...hundred and seventy...hundred and seventy-one...hundred and seventy-two..._

It was about two days ago, when I was finally got the opportunity to make the call. I had never felt more alone, anxious, and yet excited to speak to the man who had known my father so well. There was something about sitting in that underground room, gripping the phone tightly in your hand and wondering if the numbers on the piece of paper before you were nothing more than a joke or if the entire thing was nothing more than a figment of one's imagination. However, as a dull click proceeded the familiar tone of the phone ringing at the other end, I was unaware I was holding my breath until a voice finally came on.

"Hello?"

It didn't exactly sound manly, but then again, hadn't Jiraiya said that this line was not really directly connected to him? He could be in any part of the world, but as long as I called this number, he'd be sure to get my message. Perhaps this was his servant or something of the sort.

"Uumm..." I cleared my throat and tried again. "I would like to speak to Jiraiya please."

There was a series of several clicks, as if an unseen device was analyzing my voice (and it probably was for all I knew), before the voice returned. "Are you Uzumaki Naruto?"

"Yes..." I began, but the clicks interrupted me again.

"Please hold on," the voice stated crisply.

A single beep, and by this time I was just about ready to gnaw on my finger nails in worry. What if Jiraiya didn't actually exist? What if this was someone from Danzo's crew who had planned this all from the beginning? What if –

"Naruto?" came the sudden gruff and deep voice that nearly had me falling off the chair. I had been so lost in my paranoid thoughts I had almost forgotten I was still being put on hold.

"Uzumaki Naruto?" the voice persisted as if impatient. I realized I'd have to speak quickly before he hung up on me. But man, for a guy who was supposedly 'old', his voice still sounded as if he could wring my neck with just a finger.

"Yes, this is Uzumaki Naruto, and you must be -"

"Jiraiya, yes." There was a smile in his voice now. "It is good to finally hear from you, young man. However, we cannot speak too long on the phone."

Huh? What is he talking about? How else are we to -?

"I will be arriving in Busan next week," he answered as if hearing my unspoken question. "And I should be in Buk-gu sometime Tuesday morning. I already know where you are staying, so be ready for me at about ten-thirty. Look out for a local yellow taxi which will pull up to your apartment complex at the time. I'd prefer you were waiting out there for me instead of having me wait for you. Understand, my boy?"

"Yes, sir," I replied on autopilot with my heart drumming a wild staccato in my chest. Yes. I could definitely tell this guy had been a boss of the _yakuza_. He exuded that authority even over the damn phone.

"Good, good." The smile was back in his voice. "I look forward to seeing you then, Naruto. Take care of yourself now."

"Okay, but..." Unfortunately, he was already gone as the dial tone filled my ears, and I was left holding the phone like a moron for a few seconds longer.

_...hundred and eighty-two...hundred and eighty-three...hundred and eighty-four..._

I was excited to see him, no doubt about that. I had so many questions to ask, but I was sure I wouldn't even know where to begin. I contemplated bringing Shika with me, but considering he's still gung-ho over his girl and hasn't really talked to me that much recently, I decided not to bother with it. Besides, I was still on the fence about him joining me (us) in this fight. I knew he still wanted to probably seek his revenge for Asuma's death, but in the grand scheme of things, I would much rather he take Temari and seek refuge in a new country altogether until the battles were over and order was restored. It wasn't fair to drag Temari into this after being apart for so long. Those two deserved a happy life as a married couple. If nothing else, I owed that much to him after all he's done for me.

_...hundred and ninety...hundred and ninety-one...hundred and ninety-two..._

So I could probably go alone to meet up with Jiraiya, but then again...what if something happened to me? I mean, I didn't really know this guy besides reading his documents (which might be a complete and total fabrication for all I know), and I'd at least want someone to know where I was or to keep me company in case of an emergency.

(so why don't you ask _him_?)

_...hundred and ninety-four...hundred and ninety-five..._

Like hell he'll want to come with me.

I pouted and strained to finish up the last few crunches. Knowing I was close to the end was beginning to trigger all the aches and pains I had managed to suppress for the past hour or so. I gritted my teeth and forced myself to continue.

_...hundred...and...ninety...six...fuck..._

Well, maybe Haku then. At least he'd let me borrow Haku as a bodyguard for a few hours, wouldn't he? Although, for some reason, I could see the guy saying "Hell no!" and slamming the door in my face. Come to think of it, is it just me or does he seem to be hogging Haku even more these days? Haku, who used to stay for at least an hour every day, hardly stopped by anymore, and when I did see him; he was stuck to his master's side like glue. Was it something I said or did?

_...hundred and ninety...seven..._

Karin then?

_...hundred...and...ninety...eight...urgh..._

Nah. Too weird to have her tagging after me for some trip she won't really understand. Besides, I had the feeling even if I did ask her; she'd probably turn me down. This, of course, leaves –

_...hundred and...ninety...nine..._

(Mr. Wonderful)

What if he says "no" as well? What then?

(then you just take your sorry ass to that car and deal with whatever comes your way, Uzumaki Naruto. Since when were you so dependent on others anyway? You're the Lone Ranger, remember?)

_...two...motherfucking...hundred! Yes!_

I collapsed onto the mat and sucked in huge gulps of air; sweat drenched and blinking them out of my eyes as the mid-day sun beat down on me mercilessly. My chest heaved with every harsh breath I took, and it took me almost five minutes to finally turn onto my side, and even that was a lesson in tolerance.

_Shit. Guess I overdid it today._ Still – it was a good workout and very much needed.

I stretched out my hand for the water bottle, glad to see there was still a little ice in it left. I sat up a little to guzzle some down thirstily and the rest I poured over my feverish head and face.

_Whoo...feels good!_

All the same, I was still in a dilemma. To go alone or not to go alone. That was the question. I could at least tell the others where I'd be, so they don't worry about me too much, but I still felt like I needed to be with someone. With our current situation, wouldn't Itachi suggest the same thing? In case there was a skirmish, I'd need someone to back me up. Besides, even if I asked Sasuke to accompany me, his leg wasn't still all that great and he wouldn't be able to wield his _katana_ effectively anyway. What good was he to me?

And so it was that I found myself standing at the door to their apartment later that evening, trying to form the right words to convey to him about borrowing Haku for the day. However, after several knocks and being ignored, I was just about ready to kick down the door and curse them out for being such jerks (and you couldn't tell me they had gone to bed already since it was just eight o'clock), when I finally noticed the little note someone had left beneath the door.

I opened the piece of paper to read the hastily scribbled words:

_In gym_

So much for leaving long explanations. All the same I headed down there, still rehearsing the way I was going to phrase things, while hoping (and crossing my fingers) that he'd be agreeable to my decision. I opted out of using the stairs this time, and though the elevator was no faster (and damn if it didn't stink of stale vegetables), I was finally on the first floor.

The gym was situated in the very last room at the end of the hallway; past locked storage rooms and two apartments with geriatric occupants who favored the volumes of their televisions at the highest levels. It was almost hidden, or rather more of an afterthought, or perhaps just another extra room that Jae Weong converted into a gym at the request of the original building's inhabitants. Either way, it was secluded and away from prying eyes, and as I peeked through the narrow glass vision panel to see who was inside, I was fully expecting to see the usual sight of Haku kneeling before Sasuke as they worked on his leg exercises. However, there seemed to be no sign of the long-haired teen, and as I pushed open the door, I was heralded by the now annoying (and aggravating) whine of the treadmill and the most astonishing sight of Sasuke _walking_ on the machine.

It's a miracle!

...well not so much actually.

He was holding onto the handles on both sides, sweat pouring off his strained features in buckets. You could clearly see the guy was struggling, but he was being a stubborn mule and sticking it out as he forced himself to walk with each grinding motion of the machine. He hadn't noticed me yet – the machine was that loud – and I was free to study him in silence. The white tee was stuck to his back with dark patches of his exertions; evident beneath his armpits as well. The pair of black shorts was just long enough to hide the top of the bandages wrapped around his thigh, and I was glad to see there were no blood spots forming on the white cloth; a clear sign that the stitches were either holding up well, or they had finally begun to heal. Still, a hard pang struck me as I realized that I was the cause of his agony. I was the reason why he would probably walk the rest of his life with a limp, if he didn't end up aggravating the injury that is. I was the reason he was biting his lower lip hard as he tried not to scream out his frustration and pain. I was the reason why every agonizing step he took felt like a lead weight on my chest. Maybe if I had struck somewhere else during our fight...

(oh yeah? Like where? Remember he was trying to kill you too, and you had no other choice!)

Fair enough. We both inflicted damage on each other as I absently rubbed my shoulder and lowered my lashes at the memory of that damned _katana_ sinking into my flesh and nearly taking off my entire arm -

"Fuck!" came the low curse that jerked me out of my reverie. I looked up just in time to see him nearly sliding off the machine, but his quick reflexes had him gripping the handles again and steadying himself. I must have made a movement because he finally whipped his head around with an expression that was a mixture of surprise and annoyance.

Whoops. Guess I was the last person he expected to see.

I couldn't be sure, but though he was already flushed from his workout, I had the feeling he was turning even redder for some reason. He finally turned away from me with another muttered curse beneath his breath and switched the treadmill off. Listening to that monstrosity die off with a loud sigh, as if weary of even doing its job, was even more aggravating.

"What are you doing here?" came the curt, but slightly breathless question, which was soon muffled as he grabbed the towel hanging off the machine to wipe his face.

"Where's Haku?" I blurted out, before mentally kicking myself for starting off so bluntly. I had to ease into the request, right?

Sasuke ignored me for a long minute – still wiping his face – and when he eventually lowered it, it was to give me a look I couldn't quite decipher. Was he pissed off or just looking at me with that familiar condescending air?

"He's not here," he finally replied, and I was right. He _was_ talking to me with that condescending tone. Asshole.

"I can see that," I replied tightly. "I just wanted to know -"

"He and Karin went to grab a few things," he interrupted me rudely. "If you're that desperate to see him, he should be back in about half-an-hour."

"Oh..."

Well damn...this was going to be pretty awkward now. How was I going to bring up the topic of -?

_Whoa..._

Having to lean against the handle for balance, watching Sasuke take off his shirt was bringing back (horrible) flashbacks - of the 'twin sister' I had jerked off to - with a damn vengeance. I could feel the heat rushing from the tips of my toes to the roots of my hair; powerless to look away from the pale chest (slightly marred with scars from his fights) and hard dusky rose nipples that glistened with the sweat from his exercise. The sudden dryness of my tongue forced me to dart it out to lick my lips; more to gather moisture than anything, and though my mind screamed for me to look the fuck away, I just _couldn't_. All I could see were the two bodies meshing into one, the way my wild fantasies had imagined my hands exploring every damn inch of that pale flesh...kissing..sucking...maybe biting a little...

**Goddamnit. **

It was the growing ache in my pants that finally had me gritting my teeth and turning away with an effort.

Hoping he hadn't observed my moment of weakness, I pretended to inspect the weights and noticed that he was now lifting about thirty pounds to build up his arm strength. Not bad.

"What did you want to see Haku for?" came the blunt question that jarred me from my frazzled thoughts.

"Uh..." Jesus! Why the hell does my voice sound that thick? I coughed a little and forced myself to continue without looking at him. I could hear him shuffling off the machine, and though I knew I should help by giving him his crutch, I was frozen. If I walked, he'd definitely see my boner and I had to will this fucker down lest it embarrass the hell out of me. How was I supposed to explain that seeing him bare-chested was a damn turn on now? Great. As if I needed anything else _weird_ to happen between us. Did I also mention that the hickey was finally fading away? Another much-needed blessing. The more I looked at that thing, the more it reminded me of a moment when I was sure insanity had crept into my consciousness. Or maybe it was just the fever acting up at the time.

"...well actually," I continued with what I hoped was flippant nonchalance. Is it getting too hot in here? "I wanted to ask you a favor. Do you...uh...mind if I borrowed Haku for a day?"

"Yes."

_The hell?_

I spun around with my jaw probably somewhere on the ground. Sasuke was sitting on one of the workout benches now; the towel now draped around his neck and with an expression icy enough to freeze steam. What the hell is he so pissed off about anyway?

"You don't even know what I want him for!" I snapped in disbelief.

He rolled his eyes and rubbed the back of his head with the towel. "Please. In your desperate and pathetic need to figure out your true feelings about him, you wish to take him out on a date, right?"

I swear my mind went blank for a second at this unexpected and very confusing deduction from him, but I finally shook my head to clear the fog and huffed in irritation. "Now listen here -"

"You're not going to make a fool of my servant's loyalty, Naruto," Sasuke the Chivalrous quipped. "Haku's emotions are fragile enough as they are, and the last thing I need is for you to impose yourself on him and make him think that you actually do care about him when you are simply using him for your own selfish purposes."

This guy is a piece of work, ain't he? Such a pompous, son-of-a -

"You done?" I asked coldly.

He met my gaze and allowed his lips to quirk into what could be considered a smirk. "For now."

"Good, you fucktard," I snarled. "I was only going to ask him to escort me to meet up with Jiraiya when he comes to see me next week. I was hoping to have some sort of backup in case something happened, but hey! Since you're so protective of your dear Haku, why don't _you_ take his place instead?"

With how angry he was making me, I really had no intention of inviting him, but a part of me figured if we did get ambushed, I wouldn't miss him getting killed just for being such a goddamn pain-in-the-ass. Watching his features turn crimson and look embarrassed (unsure) was a minor victory. I couldn't figure out why he'd be so upset at the idea of someone like me showing interest in his servant. Geez. Did he really think I was that much of a piranha? Even if I was interested in Haku _like that_, I would never treat him like a tool.

His gaze drifted to the floor and then to the machines. He couldn't seem to look me in the eye anymore.

_Yeah. Embarrassed now, ah? I thought so._

"Well?" I queried impatiently. "I'll take your apology first and then you can let me know whether it's going to be you or Haku following me."

"Why don't you ask your _friend_?" he seemed to sneer.

"My _friend_ is with his woman, in case you've been living under a fucking rock the past week," I sneered back. "I'm not gonna bother him for this -"

"But you want Haku instead?"

"I need someone for protection..." I shook my head to explain properly. "Just in case something happens."

"You don't trust this Jiraiya?"

"I don't trust you either. Hell, I don't even trust myself. I could walk out of here tomorrow morning and kiss this whole shebang goodbye. What then?"

He watched me intently for a good long minute; so long I felt the flush coming back again and not in a good way. I really wished he'd put his goddamn shirt back on, but all he did was cover his head with the towel and lower his gaze to the floor as if in deep thought. The music changed to something slow, but still pop-ish, and the ceiling fan continued to crank out as much air as it possibly could in this oven of a room.

"Well?" I finally snapped when nothing was forthcoming.

"I'll think about it," came the drawled reply. He tried to stand up, but I guess he had overused his leg muscles because he sat back down with a grimace. A muttered curse beneath his breath had me moving toward the crutch at the corner of the room.

"Need this?" I asked as I held out the equipment to him. He looked up with a nod and reached out for it, but I swung it away from him; a smirk coming to my lips.

"First off, I never did hear an apology for your wrong assumptions earlier, and secondly, I need an answer now. You coming with me or not?"

He scowled. "Are you giving me an ultimatum?"

"Where's my apology?"

"You seem to get off hearing me say "I'm sorry", don't you?" came the low statement; that dark inscrutable expression coming back to his visage. "If this is your way of punishing me for what happened back then..."

"No," I corrected him with a wag of my finger, while pretending to be leaning on the crutch myself. Yikes. Had no idea how uncomfortable this thing was beneath the armpit. Must suck having to walk for a long time with it jabbing under you like this, but I digress. "You are saying "I'm sorry" for being such a pompous jackass and assuming I was going to do something horrible to Haku. You just run your mouth like you know everything, don't you?"

"What was I supposed to think when you bluntly ask for him especially after..."

His voice trailed off, and he looked away as if unable to finish his thought without revealing too much of himself. However, I think it was slowly beginning to sink in as to why he was acting this protective. Ever since that day I said I would hit on Haku if he was a girl, he (Sasuke) had been acting so damn possessive. Could it be...?

"Hah!" I grinned as something – almost light...can't really explain it – filled my chest. "Ah ha!"

"Ah ha, what?" he asked with a raised brow. "And stop smiling like that."

But I couldn't. I knew what it was now, and it was pretty damn hilarious. "You're _jealous_, aren't you?"

His dark blush and the brief widening of his eyes was more than enough for me to know I had hit the mark. He tried to stand up again, but his legs wouldn't cooperate.

"Give me my crutch," he grated tightly.

"You're jealous at the idea of both of us being together, aren't you?" I pestered on with no intention of letting him off the hook. This was just too good.

"Naruto...I'm warning you..."

"What? What are you gonna do? Hobble over here and pummel me to death? Admit it, Sasuke. It kills you that I'm showing interest in him -"

He snorted. "Please. You know as well as I do that your so-called 'interest' is nothing but a joke. To you, Haku is nothing more than a walking contradiction you cannot wrap your feelings around. On the one hand, you like him for being a good friend, on the other hand, your physical attraction to his looks and mannerisms makes you question your sexuality, doesn't it?"

I frowned at this cut-and-dry analysis; briefly tempted to clobber him on the head with the damn crutch. He must have realized he got me in a sore spot because it was his time to gloat. "Oh? What's wrong, Naruto? Was I right after all?"

"Fuck you."

"Sure. Resort to your monosyllabic insults when I speak the truth."

He took a deep breath and tried – for the third time – to rise up on his own. He at least managed to get there half-way before nearly falling flat on his face. I probably would have left him to fall, but my damn instinct to help people when in distress kicked in before I could control it. I dove for him, dropping the crutch at the same time, and ended up sending us both colliding painfully into the weight machine.

Son-of-a-bitch! That hurts!

"Are you all right?"

_Like you give a shit. _

I lifted my lashes to give a reply (having squeezed my eyes shut at the collision), when it all seemed to finally sink in that I was lying on my back and the weight above me wasn't one of the weights after all, but actually –

_Ah fuck...not good..._

If you could hear the alarm bells going off in my head at this very moment, they'd sound like a crazed man ringing them with no self-control whatsoever. The floor felt hard and unforgiving against my back, but juxtaposed with the warmth and heaviness of his body...of feeling that bare chest I had fantasized about pressed against mine...of hearing our heartbeats pounding loud within my ears...of feeling my mouth dry up again as my gaze drifted to lips I no longer bothered denying I wanted to taste for even the briefest of seconds. A drop of his sweat landed on my nose...and another on my cheek...and yet another at the corner of my mouth, which I foolishly proceeded to lick off slowly as if savoring something rich and delicious for the first time. I vaguely heard his soft intake of breath at what I had just done, and all but bit back a groan as I felt him _move_ against me; move in such a way that I knew now that he wasn't as immune to my proximity as I had imagined.

(so not good at all)

Our eyes finally met, and in those dark orbs, I swear I could see...

"Naruto."

My name was like a breathless, choked sob from his lips that was simply no more than a breath away from mine, and with my heart now thudding like a drummer on acid, my head beginning to swim with the impossible scenario of finally giving in to a temptation that could be the death of me –

_(us)_

...I called upon every single self-restraint fiber in my being to say quietly and with as much detachment as I could manage. "I'll be fine if you get off me."

I watched – with a hard ache in my chest – as pain and disappointment filled those dark eyes before they were quickly replaced with a blankness I was all too familiar with.

(_sorrysorrysorrysorryI'msosorry_)

He couldn't seem to get off me fast enough, which was a clumsy affair all around. Finally, he managed to drag his crutch toward him and without saying another word, or even looking at me, he walked out of the room with a thunderous slam of the door behind him.

(well done, Uzumaki Naruto)

I couldn't get myself to move from my position for a good ten minutes or so, my mind still reliving just how close we had been to finally giving in to carnal desires that might be detrimental in the long run. I hadn't signed up for this. I didn't want him to think that the hickey incident was going to be something that would give him cause to believe I'd easily give myself up to another man. He had lived so long with Snake Dude, and in an environment with no females, it was no surprise he would be attracted to another guy. If I wasn't here, he'd have done the same thing to whichever poor sap was in my position. Sasuke was the one who was probably the more confused of the both of us. And just as he had accused me of wanting to do something terrible to Haku, I didn't want him to get hurt when he realized I could never return those kinds of feelings he was looking for. I mean, there's no denying the physical attraction is there but...was I really ready to act upon it? Maybe it really was better for him to be with Haku in the long run. They had more in common and I was sure he'd make Sasuke much happier than anyone else possibly could.

So why the hell does it still feel like I had just let something really special slip from my fingers? And why the hell did it hurt so much?

* * *

><p>The weekend came and went with little fanfare.<p>

Temari and Shika – taking a break from being all lovey-dovey – suggested we go for a little sightseeing around the city. It would be a nice reprieve from the monotony of being in the apartment, and we were all excited to go...except for Sasuke who remained behind. I could barely look at him now, and the feeling was mutual. The tension between us had become even tauter, so much so everyone else had noticed that our conversation was stilted and not as 'cordial' as it used to be. When Shika queried about us getting into another argument, I was unable to give him a satisfactory answer, and he was smart enough to leave it at that.

It was a fun outing, all things considered, but I was about as excited as a man on death row. Having to plod after the happy couple, while Karin and Haku (who had finally come after Sasuke all but kicked him out to enjoy himself) were like brother and sister on a tourist vacation. I was the odd one out, and wanted nothing more than to return back to the apartment and drown myself in melodramas and cheesy game shows.

By Tuesday morning, I was all but ready to be as far away from the apartment as possible, and by nine o'clock, I was all dressed and ready to see my father's mentor. Anticipation made me restless, and I tried to kill time by walking around the block and playing with some of the children I noticed in the front yard. It was while figuring out how to 'walk the dog' with one of the kid's yoyo, did I finally notice we had company.

I looked up – I was on my haunches with the little munchkins – still smiling, only for the smile to falter a little as the newcomer came to a stop beside us. He was dressed as casually as I was – in a pair of jeans, an unbuttoned dress shirt with a tee beneath. Although I'm sure the only difference was that he wasn't sporting a concealed weapon like I was. I had tucked in the Glock within the back of my jeans as well as a throwing knife within my boots. I knew I was being overly cautious, but then again, I had woken up this morning thinking I was going to be going on this trip solo. Since he hadn't given me an answer that day at the gym, and none since then, I had assumed I'd be the only one going to see Jiraiya today. However, I would be remiss if I didn't admit that seeing him now made me ridiculously happy. That despite what happened at the gym, he was still willing to help me -

"Don't think I'm doing this because I want to," came the cold words that pretty much shot down my brief moment of joy. "And I'm not going to be your bodyguard either."

"Then go back," I growled. "I don't need you here."

"Liar. Without me, you'd probably make a botch of things."

"Hey -"

"And besides, I think he's here. Stand up already."

"Don't boss me around, you asshole."

But as expected, he wasn't listening to me. He was already hobbling toward the waiting taxi which had pulled up to the side of the building. After saying goodbye to the kids (with a promise that I'd be back to play with them tomorrow), I jogged up to catch him, and together we stood and watched the back window lower slowly.

At first I could make out nothing but shadows, and my heart was beating so fast (maybe from the jogging or from anticipation), but eventually, the figure moved closer to reveal a face that looked very non-threatening. It was a broad and friendly visage, accentuated with twin red streaks that ran down his cheeks as if crying tears of blood, narrow black eyes that were filled with wisdom and intelligence and topped with a massive mane of white hair that gave the impression of an electrocuted lion.

"Well, well," he drawled in that familiar deep voice I heard over the phone. "As I live and breathe. It really is Minato's son after all...and you..." He peered at Sasuke with his gaze narrowing even further. "I see traces the Uchiha blood in you. Sasuke, I presume."

"...yes..."

"Good! At least it's good to know you didn't inherit any of Fugaku's horrendous features."

My jaw dropped at the blatant insult, but Jiraiya's loud guffaw and Sasuke's flushed features eased the awkwardness a bit. Guess the guy was just kidding, and I made a mental note to not take his insults so seriously.

"Come in, come in," he invited with a wave of his hand, while scooting back. "We have a lot of catching up to do."

It was a tight fit in the back seat, but I found myself squeezed between Jiraiya's massive frame (boy! was the guy huge), and Sasuke with his stick of doom. I think he was punishing me for what happened the other day by jabbing me with it at every opportunity. Even my glares at him didn't work. He just seemed to pretend I wasn't in the car with them.

"You knew my father?" he asked as the taxi finally pulled away and began its journey through the streets of Buk-gu. I had no idea where we were going, but I felt little assurance that I had my weapons and Sasuke with me.

"Knew him?" Jiraiya said with a snort. He was watching us with acute interest. Me especially. "I hated your father...most of us did."

"Ah."

"It's because he was in the _yakuza_," I explained quickly when Sasuke looked as if he was about ready to give the big guy a piece of his mind.

Jiraiya nodded in agreement. "Naturally. Your father tried to bring most of us down. Was successful for the most part, but otherwise, we made his life a living hell."

"I can imagine," Sasuke muttered.

"And who would have thought that all these years later, the son of the commissioner of police would be friends with the son of the potential leader of the Syndicate?"

"We are not friends," we said simultaneously...looked at each other briefly, and turned away as if embarrassed at our quick denials.

Jiraiya couldn't quite seem to comprehend this, but settled for simply nodded and giving an unintelligible mutter beneath his breath. There was a heartbeat of an awkward silence before he spoke again. "Have you boys had an opportunity to taste the foods of the imperial court yet?"

"What's that?" I asked.

He grinned and rubbed his hands together. "I'm glad you asked. It's a traditional meal set aside for royalty, and since it's been a while since my last visit to this beautiful country, what better way to celebrate my return but to have a feast fit for a king? Would you young men care to join me?"

"...I thought we were going to talk about...you know...my father?" I added in a whisper as if afraid of the driver hearing.

"And we will discuss him and so much more...but over food because I can't really think if I haven't eaten properly. Not to worry. We will be in a location that is free from prying eyes and twitching ears. So...what say you? We can consider this brunch, eh?"

"Works for me," I replied with a grin. "I skipped breakfast."

As if on cue, my stomach growled loudly, which earned loud laughter from Jiraiya and a roll of Sasuke's eyes. Still, it felt good to be in this man's presence and I could see how and why my father would consider him as a...well father-figure as well. He was dressed in traditional Japanese garb, but you could tell that his clothing was made of the finest material. He smelled like the wild; and by that, I mean a freshness that comes from wandering through the woods first thing in the morning. It was a reminder that like me, this man was also a wanderer and had traveled to so many different places since his abdication from the Syndicate. I discovered that I not only wanted to know more about my father, but about this man who was so full of life and an energy that was contagious.

He was even beginning to rub off Sasuke, because by the time we finally arrived at the grand estate, Jiraiya had managed to wring out a smile or two from the guy. Speaking of grand estates, where the fuck were we? The taxi had long pulled off the main highways, and we seemed to be smack dab in the middle of a forest of towering trees.

"Is this a temple?" I asked in awe as we walked upon a ground that was coated with the whitest and polished of gravel stones.

"You could say that," Jiraiya replied with a smile while leading the way with his hands clasped behind his back. "This is actually a home of a good friend of mine, and he is ready for our arrival. Watch your step now, boys."

A flight of steps led us to the entrance of a Japanese-style pagoda, where two ornate looking marble statues of intimidating lions awaited us. Odd. This design kinda reminded me of...

"Looks a lot like the exterior design of Byaku-Shinkyou, doesn't it?" Jiraiya stated with a knowing look in Sasuke's direction. As for Sasuke, he looked even paler than ever, and I was sure his eyes looked a little too shiny as he bit his lower lip and simply nodded in response. Guess I could relate a little to what he was feeling. That place was his home after all, and it was only right to feel homesick.

The interior courtyard was even more eerie, and I know because I had been in that damn courtyard before especially in my nightmares. Just rearrange a few buildings, and it was like being thrown back into that cold day when Sasuke had looked me in the eye and sentenced me to death. Neither of us said anything as we followed Jiraiya in silence, and I was never gladder when we were finally confronted – not by turban-wearing guards - but by two beautiful women in colorful traditional Korean attire. They greeted Jiraiya with a familiarity that did not escape me, and I got a chance to see the big guy turn on the charm with some flirtatious remarks. Man, he really had no shame, did he?

After quick introductions – turns out the girls were daughters of the owner of the place – we were ushered into the cool but tastefully furnished interior of one of the pagodas where a feast, literally fit for a king (or several) awaited us.

"Wow..." I whispered as my stomach began to do the tango again. The women giggled at the sound as I blushed in embarrassment and bowed in apology. All the same, it was a buffet of local delicacies set around a low circular wooden table with large, lush pillows reminiscent of something from the royal palaces –for us to sit on. In the middle was the highlight of the meal, which according to the girls, was called a _sinseollo_. It was basically a large silver vessel with a hole in the middle where hot coals were put to keep the food warm. As for the food itself, it was a colorful combination of meatballs, small and round _jeonyueo_ (salted meats and fish), mushrooms, and vegetables. There were bowls of _sura_ (boiled rice and grains), of two varieties – red and white. There were at least five different kinds of dumplings, with so many ingredients and names I was beginning to lose count. My favorite, the _myeon sinseollo_ which was pretty much noodles in some kind of meaty broth that was to die for. I mean, I could go on and on with all the plates these ladies kept revealing, and it got to a point where I didn't even know what to eat anymore!

Jiraiya didn't seem to mind as he wolfed down the food with gusto, while teaching Sasuke and I about the etiquette and how we were to eat and behave in front of the ladies and his friend. Speaking of his friend, the guy turned out to be some hundred-year-old geezer (I kid. I doubt he was that old), but he was bent over though and had to walk with the aid of an ornate walking stick. He had long white hair and a matching beard that was kept in a ponytail. His features were so wrinkled with age that even his eyes were hard to make out beneath the bushy eyebrows. Turns out he was once an important government official in Korea, and had known Jiraiya when he was just a kid. The _ojiisan_ made small talk and didn't eat much, but he did nod in all the right places as Jiraiya regaled us with stories about their youth.

Finally, Sasuke couldn't take it anymore and just had to ask about the architecture.

"Ah, yes," _Ojiisan_ replied while rubbing his long beard as if in thought. He fell silent for so long, I was beginning to wonder if he had fallen asleep. I guess he must have because Jiraiya coughed loudly and the poor guy started as if goosed. "Yes, the architecture was indeed inspired by the famous Byaku-Shinkyou in the North," the man continued as if he hadn't dozed off in mid-sentence.

Sasuke lowered his bowl with an awe-struck expression on his face. "Really?"

"True, true," _Ojiisan_ muttered with a nod. "My great-grandfather was a good friend of the Uchiha clan and visited often. He returned to Buk-gu with a need to pay homage to them. Some of the Uchiha actually visited several times in the past."

Call me an idiot, but seeing Sasuke's expression – the unadulterated sense of relief – made my damn heart skip a beat. I had a feeling that the guy must have grown up believing that everyone on the planet hated his clan, but seeing this old geezer admit that the Uchiha did have allies in the past must mean a lot to him. So much so, he pestered _Ojiisan_ with questions until we were munching on some delicious rice cakes for dessert.

Sorry, I'd recount all they talked about, but I got bored with the conversation half-way through, partly because I was stuffed and now feeling sleepy.

Jiraiya must have noticed because he announced that we were going for a walk to see the rest of the grounds and get some fresh air. We thanked _Ojiisan_ and his lovely daughters for the delicious meal, and after receiving some blessings from the old man, we headed out to the impeccably-kept gardens.

"Incredible to see such rare flowers and plants here," Sasuke murmured while inspecting every damn leaf and petal with interest. I could tell this was his thing. He was in his element amongst the foliage and just like he did with _Ojiisan_, he prodded Jiraiya for answers in a way that made me feel a little jealous at how much the guy knew. He made me feel dumb because I couldn't join in the conversation. I knew nothing about flowers and plants except that some were pretty to look at, some smelled good, and girls seemed to like them. Why would I care about appropriate weather conditions and soil type? And why the hell was Jiraiya even paying so much attention to this anyway? I didn't see him as the kind of guy to indulge in botany.

"What say we sit over there beneath the trees for a little rest?" Jiraiya eventually invited, which filled me with relief. We made our way to four stone benches around a matching round table beneath the welcome shade of some of the largest trees in the vicinity. It was beside a neat koi pond, with the largest koi I had ever seen actually, and their colors – electric blue and orange – were damn cool to see. I wish I had a camera to capture it. In addition, we had a great view of the mountains in the distance and a bird eye's view of the city below. To me, Buk-gu looked like a conglomeration of paper houses threatening to crumble with a strong gust of wind. It was an eerie feeling.

"So, Naruto," Jiraiya began as he dug into his kimono to whip out a pipe. As if on cue, a servant dressed in red robes, appeared from nowhere with a tray of refreshments which were placed on the table. In antique white bowls/cups, was a cold but sweet dark liquid called _sujeonggwa_. Made of dried persimmons, cinnamon, ginger, and peppercorn (and garnished with pine nuts), the tangy taste was actually quite enjoyable. There was also a small bowl filled with some kind of sweet smelling tobacco Jiraiya was now stuffing into his pipe.

"I'm sure you're burning with a lot of questions," he began once the servant was gone. "However…" His gaze drifted to Sasuke. "I was under the impression that wanted this to be a private affair?"

"He's all right," I said with a light shrug; the Glock now seeming to burn a hole into my flesh. I felt incredibly stupid for bringing it.

"I thought you weren't friends."

"We aren't," I replied tightly, though my cheeks were flushing with embarrassment at the knowing expression on the older man's face. "He's just here to -"

"Make sure he doesn't get in trouble," Sasuke chimed in. I pinned him an incredulous look and was rewarded with a small smirk. That sneaky -! "Rest assured, whatever you say here will be kept a secret. I'm not one to blab like some people."

"You know what? I've changed my -"

"Sounds good to me," Jiraiya interrupted with a grin and a puff of smoke from his pipe. The aroma immediately tickled my nose and almost had me sneezing. "I applaud your precautions, Naruto. It shows that you are aware of how dangerous your position is. You truly are the product of your father's loins."

"…eh…thanks?"

He puffed again and leaned against the tree; a thoughtful expression on his visage. "I will not go over what you've read in the documents Shisui gave to you, but I brought you here for a reason. It was a lucky break that you brought Sasuke along as you no doubt see the connection beginning to form now. Call it fate or destiny, but it seems like your lives were meant to come at a crossroads. I take it you've told Sasuke about Minato's failed mission."

I could feel Sasuke's sharp gaze burning into me, but I stubbornly kept my eyes on Jiraiya. "No," I mumbled. "He doesn't know anything about the documents actually."

"Ah, I see..." There was yet another awkward pause before Jiraiya asked quietly. "Do you want me to tell him? Or would you rather do it?"

I shrugged lightly. "It doesn't matter to me if he knows. Itachi knows the whole story anyway, so guess it's Sasuke's turn."

Jiraiya cleared his throat and began to recount what I read in the dossier. Pretending to sip my drink, I watched Sasuke's expression carefully. He gave nothing away except for the tightening of his fingers around his cup when the part about my father giving up on taking down Fugaku was thwarted at the sight of father and son (the young Itachi) together. Jiraiya went on to tell of the fate of my father after his costly decision as well as my 'dramatic' birth. I didn't recall giving him the permission to get that far with the story, but to be honest, it was good everything was coming out now. Sasuke did have a right to know why I wanted to get rid of both Ikegami and Danzo, and Jiraiya was doing a good job setting it up. When he was finally done, a heavy silence descended upon us, broken only by the twitter of unseen birds in the trees and the soothing lull of the pond.

"Do you understand Naruto's anger now, Sasuke?" came the quiet question that had me looking up again to watch Sasuke's reaction. His elbows were upon the table now, the drink long forgotten. There was a pensive expression on his visage, and I would have paid big bucks to know exactly what he was thinking.

"I understand," he finally replied carefully as if weighing his words. I wasn't fast enough to look away when he finally caught me staring at him, and it was hard to tell what was behind those dark eyes that studied me intensely. "I understand all too well."

There goes the damn heart skipping a beat again.

"However," Sasuke continued, finally releasing me from his scrutiny by looking at Jiraiya. "This is not going to be an easy battle. Naruto is like a needle in a haystack. He'll be swallowed up by the Syndicate and Danzo if he goes at it alone."

"I was going to ask the Triad for..."

Jiraiya held up a hand to stall me. "Out of the question, Naruto."

"Why?" I asked incredulously. "They could help -"

"Oh yes, they'd _definitely_ love to help but at a price you cannot even begin to imagine," came the quiet but firm response that had me sitting back with a deflated spirit. "You do know that there is no love lost between the _yakuza_ and the triad, and any opportunity to gain control of territory in Japan is like inviting a nest of bees to honey. They are a ruthless bunch, Naruto. I should know as I've had my share of turf wars with them in the past." He leaned forward to stare hard at me. "Itachi told me of this plan and I've talked him out of it, which brings us to the second one. Working with and for Danzo."

I took a deep breath and looked away.

"I trust you've been thinking hard about it?"

Have I? When not dealing with 'the other stuff', it was all I could think about. The temptation was more than strong to say "yes" to Danzo if he found me, or rather if I allowed myself to be found. However, it would have to be done in such a way as not to get the others involved.

I shifted restlessly on the bench and nodded softly. "Yes, but...I'm still not sure what to do." I looked at him for help. "What do _you_ think I should do?"

"What does your heart tell you?"

"I can't even trust my damn heart sometimes," I muttered; not sure why saying this had me glancing at Sasuke for some reason. If he was looking at me, he was doing a good job hiding it behind his cup. I spoke a little louder. "A part of me thinks I should go back to Japan and let myself be picked up by him. Getting to know Danzo will get me closer to Ikegami."

"Fair enough," Jiraiya agreed. "But then what?"

"Huh?"

"When you do end up killing Ikegami...then what, Naruto? I believe I mentioned in the documents that there are members of the _yakuza_ who are loyal to their bosses no matter what. Taking out someone as big and important as the _kumichō_ could create a chaos unlike anything we've ever known. Danzo will, of course, want to assume the head role by nominating a 'robot' who will carry out of his doctrines at will. However, when you do take out Danzo as well, there will be a war over control and territory. You are going to need someone who can control the angry mob that will arise due to your actions. Are you prepared to deal with the consequences?"

"...shit."

I hadn't really thought that far ahead. Why did things have to be so damn complicated?

I nearly jumped out of my skin when I felt the hand upon mine. It felt warm, strong and...well...so fatherly-like that it brought a reluctant sting of unshed tears to my eyes. I wanted to pull away from this strange sensation, but I realized that I really did crave it; that in a way being touched this way was like receiving some kind of spiritual blessing from my father. If he was here...would he say the same thing Jiraiya was saying? Would he even want me to be a part of something like this?

"You are not going to be alone, Naruto," came the soft words of encouragement as he gave me a smile. "Itachi is willing to support you with members of his organization who want to see the evil ones get their just desserts. And our wonderful host today, should be able to pull his weight around to get some members of the DIET on our side especially when it comes to Danzo. Being a former prime minister of a country does have its perks."

"What could he or Itachi and his organization possibly do?"

Jiraiya smiled and sat back again, though he didn't release my hand. "Information is power, Naruto, especially the right kind of information. Shimura Danzo has been involved with so many illegal activities, it would put a weaker man six feet under by now. However, he's always managed to cover it up and leave no trace behind thanks to his ability to weasel his way into the hearts of many...or killing them off when they get in the way. Unfortunately, secrets can only remain hidden for so long, and in due time...poof! Those walls of security built around oneself come crashing down in the most spectacular fashion. As for the Syndicate, I still have those who are loyal to me, as I mentioned, and the best way to get many members to your side is to either buy them off, or convince them as much as possible that they are being bamboozled under Ikegami's reign. In other words -"

"Begin a mutiny within the ranks," Sasuke muttered. I had almost forgotten the guy was here no thanks to Jiraiya's way with words. I was beginning to like where this was going.

Jiraiya nodded with a small smile. "Nothing aggravates a Syndicate more than a war within itself. In case we lose sight of this, there are other smaller Syndicates in Japan that would love to have the opportunity to take the bragging rights of bringing down the Bakufu. The second largest Syndicate after them is the Mibu. You must have heard of them?"

"Vaguely," I confessed with a slight shake of my head.

"Not surprising considering the Bakufu eats every other organization out there for breakfast, but yes, if you give the Mibu a chance to wage a war against the Bakufu, they'll be more than willing to pounce on the opportunity."

"But..." I shook my head more firmly now. "Listen...I don't want all that. I really don't want the _yakuza_ to start some shitty war amongst themselves."

"It's going to be inevitable, Naruto," Sasuke stated quietly. "Battles are never without consequences that we would rather not have to deal with. Innocent ones will be involved, no matter how much we try to pretend we are only targeting a specific group of individuals."

"A sad reality but true, Naruto," Jiraiya agreed. "If you choose to begin this war, you must be prepared for what lies ahead. It is clear you have no plans to take over as _kumichō_ when both Ikegami and Danzo are gone, but you must pick someone to be in charge; someone to keep things in order lest things get too out of control. Someone who -"

"I pick you then," I said flatly, and you could hear a pin drop with my sudden announcement. I held those dark eyes with mine; daring him to refuse my request, while hoping he'd accept at the same time. I realize he said he was retired, but looking at him now, I couldn't see anyone else in that position. He was still sprite enough to walk up several flights of steps without losing his breath. He still looked vigorous and alert, and I was sure he would be great at the job...at least until he found a new replacement.

He took a deep breath, sighed and then took another lungful of smoke before releasing it with a soft exhale. "I figured you'd suggest something like that."

"So is that a "yes"?"

"I am retired, Naruto -"

"Just until you find a better replacement, right? Come on, Jiraiya-sama." Might as well butter him up with the compliments. "You know more about the Syndicate than even Ikegami himself, and I'm sure those who are loyal to you will see to it that you are in charge with as little fuss as possible."

"You are putting me in a difficult position, brat." And yet I could see the small smile on his face. "Between you and Minato, I don't know who is worse at getting me to do things I don't want to."

I grinned and threw myself at him with a hug (or what was supposed to be a hug), but I ended up knocking his pipe to the floor and got a smack on the head for that as he bitched and moaned about me almost breaking his precious pipe. It didn't deter the burden that had somewhat been lifted off my shoulders now. I at least had one game plan in place, but I was yet to really come to a decision on the next step.

"Let me sleep on it," I said when Jiraiya prodded me again. "When I come to a decision, I'll definitely let you know, all right?"

"As you wish, young man. Shake on it?"

We shook hands – Sasuke's included – and prepared to head back to the main house to say our goodbyes to _Ojiisan_. Unfortunately, the guy was out for the day (taking a mid-afternoon nap) and we were escorted to our taxi by the pretty ladies, who made Sasuke and I promise to visit often. I was most definitely going to keep my promise, as for Sasuke...who the hell knows?

"Oh, look there," Jiraiya suddenly blurted out as he pointed at the window when we were back on the highway. Sasuke and I strained to see what had gotten his attention. "Looks like there's a festival taking place across the river. Would you like to see what it's about?"

"I really don't think we shou..." Sasuke began just as I said "Sure!" at the same time. We eyed each other warily, and I repeated myself in case no one else heard me. "I _want_ to see what it's about. You can take Sasuke home if you like."

"Nonsense!" Jiraiya boomed and shook his head as if I had just suggested the most terrible thing in the world. "We have to enjoy the sights and sounds of our adopted country while we have the time. Now come along, you two. Lots to see. Lots to do."

The old pervert wasn't kidding, and I say pervert because he pretty much left us to do whatever we wanted, while he went 'visiting' some 'old friends' in what looked like a host club. Our instructions were to have fun and not bother him for any reason. If we needed to go back home, we could go ahead as long as we left a note at the front office.

So there I was. Stuck in the middle of a bustling Korean festival with a one-legged sour grape. He had not smiled once since we left the taxi; a clear sign he didn't want to be here. We stood in front of the club; not looking at each and not exactly knowing how the hell to kick this off. A part of me felt like leaving him to his own devices, but my rational side knew it was going to weigh on me all night. I was going to have to be his babysitter or he'd keep falling on his ass if I wasn't around to help him.

"Let's go see the acrobats," I began, turning to look at him, but to my chagrin, the guy was gone! The hell?

I craned my neck over the throng of people to search for him, and finally noticed his limping form heading toward a stall. Cursing him beneath my breath, I shoved my way through the people to get to him. And here I thought I was going to be the bigger guy by sticking to his side. Well, he could go fuck himself for all I care. In fact, why was I even bothering going to him? it was clear he didn't want to be with me, so fine. I'm off to enjoy myself too.

If he wants me, he can do the searching.

I pivoted to my left and headed to where the acrobats where performing. I forced myself to enjoy the show – which was actually pretty fun and mind-blowing – and ended up talking to a pretty girl who was a college student and quite fluent in Japanese. She confessed that she was actually from Taiwan, but had moved to South Korea a few years ago with her family. She could only speak Japanese because she was taking it as a course in her school. I commended her on being able to speak so fluently, and she seemed genuinely pleased at my compliment. She was a petite little thing, with laughter that sounded like falling rain. I could easily fall for someone like her, but I realized that allowing myself to do so wasn't going to be conducive. For starters, I couldn't tell her who I really was, neither could I invite her back to the apartment or give her a telephone number. To her, I'd be nothing more than just another face in the crowd, and I figured it would be best for us to say our goodbyes now.

"Thanks for winning the teddy bear and plastic mask for me, Junghyun," she said with a sad smile, before standing on tiptoe to place a kiss on my cheek. "I had so much fun tonight."

"Me too..."

"Whenever you come back to the city, look for me, okay? Ah Yoona. You won't forget me, will you?"

"I won't," I promised emptily. And with a lingering squeeze of her dainty hand, I watched her blend into the crowd before turning away and running smack dab into -

"Fuck!" I cursed as I rubbed my forehead, and lifted my gaze to meet the bastard responsible. "Why don't you look where you're goi...oh...it's you."

"You don't have to sound that excited to see me again," came the cold reply. "If you're done with your date, do you think we could go back now? It's getting late -"

"It's just eight o'clock," I interrupted with a wave of my hand. "You can go back if you like. I'll probably walk back home or get another taxi."

His lips tightened and he looked like he was about to say something else, when the sudden loud bang and simultaneous cheers, 'oohs' and 'aahs' filled the air. We looked up at the breathtaking show of fireworks lighting up the night sky, and damn if my heart didn't tighten as a wave of homesickness overwhelmed me. We were still under the same big sky, and yet Japan never seemed more far away than right now. It wasn't as if the fireworks were any different from the ones I had seen during festivals in Nagasaki or Kyoto, it was just the ambience I guess. You knew you weren't home because there weren't the familiar smells of _takoyaki_ or _yakitori_ filling your senses and making your mouth water. You didn't hear people screaming out the names of the firework creators as they went off, neither did you hear the familiar twang and dialect of a language you never realized you'd come to miss.

I bit my lower lip and rubbed my arms as a chill came through me. Suddenly, going back to the apartment didn't seem like such a bad idea.

"I can't remember the last time I saw fireworks like this," came the quiet statement beside me that had me looking sharply at my companion. His gaze was still trained to the heavens, and with every burst of another firework, it illuminated his features to reveal an expression that was almost akin to how he had reacted at _Ojiisan's_ revelation about his clan. That damn twist in my heart happened again and I kicked myself mentally for allowing him to get to me like this.

"...must have five or so," he was muttering. "There was a festival being held on the grounds and Itachi and I sat on the front porch of our house eating hot potatoes and counting each firework as they showed up."

Did he expect me to say something? What could I say anyway without sounding like an idiot? The firework shows I had gone to were either solo or with some other buddies of mine or with Sakura. Any real emotional attachment to the festivities were with the girl who broke my heart.

"Yeah..." I finally croaked. "Fireworks are...fun."

Yikes. That sounded moronic.

"Hey," I said with more enthusiasm than I felt inside. "Let's go see the fireworks from the bridge. It's much clearer there and not many people are hanging out on it."

"Maybe because it looks like it's about to collapse at any second?"

I rolled my eyes and began to lead the way. "Geez. Must you find fault with everything? No one's fallen in yet, have they?"

He said something I didn't quite catch, which was a good thing because I was sure he must have called me a name that would have likely gotten him a good kick in the nuts. Either way, we were soon on the bridge and having to jostle for position among mostly couples trying to be all lovey-dovey. _Bleh._ I found a good spot and leaned over the railing; feeling Sasuke press against my side as someone shoved him.

"This is really comfortable, Naruto," he said through gritted teeth. "I feel like I'm in a can of sardines."

"Look into the water and you might actually find one," I snickered and pointed to the river flowing beneath and before us. The lights from the fireworks and buildings in the vicinity illuminated the still waters; creating a beautiful illusion of fireflies dancing upon it.

"Hardy har har. Really funny."

But he did lean over to look all the same just as another series of fireworks went off. Too cool!

"It's not the same as back home, but it's still great, isn't it, Sasuke?"

He nodded in agreement as I stole a glance at him. For the first time all evening, there was a semblance of a smile on his face, and I was actually glad to see that. Secondly, he was not leaning on his crutch, but I could see him favoring the leg a little, which was a reminder that he had walked a lot today, and I had technically abandoned him to hang out with Yoona.

(well, it was all his fault anyway...)

"Who was the girl?" came the question I was least expecting. He wasn't looking at me as he asked this by the way.

"Oh...some college chick," I replied. We were having to shout a little over the sound of the fireworks, firecrackers and noisy people. "She's studying Japanese."

"Hope you didn't tell her your real name or anything of significance."

"Of course not!" Geez. What did he take me for?

There was a pause – a long pause – before he asked quietly; so quietly I had to lean closer to him to hear the question. "Are you going to see her again?"

"What?"

"I asked if you were going to see her again!"

He was looking at me now, and maybe it was because of how close we were, but I swear the lights from the fireworks were reflected in those dark eyes that could see so much. Like tiny fireflies in flight, they had me mesmerized and helpless to the flare of heat that rushed through me. And just like that, we were back in the gym; where everyone and everything suddenly didn't seem to matter.

"What if I wanted to see her again?" I found myself asking in a voice I barely recognized as mine. It was soft and teasing as if seeking to know more from him. "Would it bother you that much?"

Something flickered within his eyes and he bit his lower lip as if caught. I smiled and leaned closer still until our foreheads slightly touched. He wasn't making any effort to pull away, and I guess God was giving me a second chance to not fuck things up this time around. I hadn't stopped thinking about what could have been; of what would have happened if I had let him do what he wanted. I keep trying to convince myself that he's the one with the issues and I'm just fodder for him to test out his desires, but right now...right in this very minute...I just didn't give a fuck if he took the first step.

"Well, Sasuke?" I teased. "Would it bother you?"

"...yes..." came the barely audible reply that sent a jolt right through me at the blunt honesty in that one word. The stomach cramp returned and my heart began to throb as hard and as fast as the ache forming in my nether regions. I almost couldn't breathe.

"Sas...Sasuke, I -"

But whatever I would have said or thought in that moment was promptly wiped clean as he _finally_ ...

(oh God)

...sealed the distance between our lips with a kiss that paled in comparison to the fireworks that still blazed and sparkled above us. It couldn't have lasted more than a minute, but it was more than enough to let me know that when it came to this particular guy, I was always going to have a problem understanding why he made me feel this way. It wasn't the sort of the kiss you saw in the movies – where it seemed all soft and flowery and overdrawn. This kiss was nothing short of a statement; a firm control of a situation where he simply claimed what he felt he rightfully deserved. I had thought tasting his skin was toxic enough, but his lips - those damned lips that had uttered words of death a lifetime ago - had left me feeling weak-kneed and out-of-sorts with its intensity. If I hadn't been balancing on the railing when it happened, I probably would have fallen to the ground.

He pulled away quickly and stared stubbornly at the river as if it was responsible for his actions. Still, it wasn't enough to hide that he was flushed (as I probably still was), breathing a little shallowly (as I probably still was) or that he was licking his lips slowly as if still trying to get over the taste of me. I smiled at the sight and suddenly feeling cheeky, and a need to put him in his place – after all this was nothing short of an ambush - I leaned closer to him, but only to whisper into his ear.

"You call that a kiss, Uchiha Sasuke?" His visible tremble and soft intake of breath was just the beginning, for with a tender bite of his ear lobe, I gave him something to _really_ think about for the rest of the evening.

"When we get back home tonight, I plan on showing you how it's _really_ done."

With a smirk of satisfaction, I stepped away to admire my handiwork, and trust me when I say that the effect my words had was nothing short of _beautiful_.


	27. 27: Descent into Sin

**Notes:** Well, hello to all of you too! My goodness. Who knew a peck on the lips would get you all coming back out of the woodwork? Nice to see some familiar faces again. I thought you had long given up on any 'action' taking place, eh? So to all those who approved, disapproved, are close to asphyxiation, planning on chopping my head off, skeptical, wary, eager, excited...let's hope this chapter satisfies some part of your concern. :D So sit back, enjoy, and don't read with the kiddies or the hubby (or wifey), or bosses in the vicinity. I plead the fifth and take no responsibility for whatever happens.

**P.S:** And to those who wonder about timelines and things happening 'too fast' – wasn't it a few chapters ago, you were all complaining that things were dragging on? *lol* Please note also that we are sometime in the month of March. I am not exactly writing these scenes on a day-to-day basis, so you have to really read carefully to notice when the characters mention how many days/weeks has passed. So all in all, our boys met sometime in October of the previous year, and we are now in early March/spring.

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><p><strong>Chapter 27: <strong>

**Descent into Sin**

_I have met my love.  
>When I compare this present<br>With feelings of the past,  
>My passion is now as if<br>I have never loved before._

_**-Fujiwara no Atsutada**_

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><p><em>Sasuke:<em>

Rejection is a bitter pill to swallow.

So bitter that it sits heavily on your tongue, unable to make its way down to your stomach, and when it does get there, the churning almost makes you want to regurgitate. Harder still is the humiliation that wears on you like a cloth made of stones; dragging you into depths of thoughts you would rather not contend with. The doubts creep in and you question yourself, ruminating over every single second; wondering what you did or how you could have done things better to spare yourself the agony. Yet it is hard, so damn _hard_ to understand and decipher the human body language; where you are given the signals for one thing and when you dare to act upon it – no matter how little – you are discarded like something filthy and disgusting.

I assume the word 'hurt' would fit in this particular case; a difficult concept to get used to I must admit.

I had stormed to my apartment to lick my wounds in solitude; never gladder that Haku was not around to bother me with queries about my welfare. An avalanche of emotions: shame, anger, frustration and yes _hurt_, overwhelmed me to the point of breaking my leg all over again for my haste had me stumbling into a wall like a blind man. My hands were shaking so much, I could barely get the key into the keyhole, and when the damned door did finally open, all I could think about was storming back out to give that blond fool a piece of my mind.

(who is the real fool?)

Avoiding him for the rest of the weekend was no problem, and it did give me plenty of time to reconsider my way of dealing with him from then on. I had no idea how he would treat or look at me after my blatant wanton behavior, and yet I would have been a fool not to notice that he had actually _responded_.

It eventually hit me (after wallowing in my self-pity) that Naruto – despite his dismissal of what might have happened – had _reacted_ to our intimate proximity. His mouth might have said one thing, but his body hadn't lied. If I closed my eyes, I could still _feel _and _see_ everything, from the way those blue eyes had darkened ever so slightly (almost akin to Karin's reaction that time), the way his warm breath had quickened and caressed my face, the gentle bob and dip of his Adam's apple as he swallowed or – the best thing of all – how he had licked off my sweat in a motion that could be considered seductive (consciously or not). The most glaring evidence of his non-immunity to my presence was the – as embarrassing as this is to admit – the obvious swell below the waist. It was all I could do not to turn crimson at the realization that my movement had affected him that much, and yet a very tiny voice (almost inaudible) had screamed that this going against the scriptures and morals the Great Book had taught me. All the same I tried to convince myself that Naruto would have reacted the same way in any other condition (with any other person), after all while sparring with some officers, it wasn't that strange to have them sporting erections (myself included) thanks to the adrenaline rush one gets from fighting.

Still, that moment with Naruto had been..._different_ to say the least. It was a jolt to the senses; like being sent a surge of electricity to trigger every single nerve ending in your body. In that moment, I would have done _anything_ to experience that charge again; to fulfill what it promised and to _test_ myself. I wanted to see if I could complete what Orochimaru (and my brother in a way) had instilled within me; to experience if that 'love' and 'passion' one ought to reserve for members of the opposite sex could really apply to the male body.

Not just any male's body though...just Naruto's so far.

_(Un)Fortunately._

I was yet to meet another male to trigger off such intense responses (excluding my reactions to Haku's massages), and I was not about to ask my loyal manservant to become a guinea pig for my experiment anytime soon.

And so I swallowed my pride, did my best to brush away the 'hurt' and made up my mind to join him on his excursion with this so-called Jiraiya. I would give him the illusion that what transpired in the gym was of no bother to me, and had to applaud and pat myself on the back for doing a tremendous job in the acting department.

Luckily, Jiraiya's personality more than made up for any awkwardness that could have occurred between us, and I did find myself warming up to the large man with the uncouth mannerisms (for the most part). I had assumed that our meeting would take place in an undisclosed location and away from prying eyes, so I had to admit that the visit to the Honorable Taego Yi Seong-gye's elegant home, in the countryside, was one of the highlights of the day. To think he had once been the prime minister of the country, and not only that, but his ancestors and mine had shared drinks and visits to each others homes so many years ago. This knowledge had filled me with warmth that words simply cannot describe. The Uchihas have always been feared, respected or reviled in history. You can take your pick depending on what side of the law you belonged to. So finding anyone willing to share good memories of my family were far and few between. Seong-gye's affectionate recollections of my great-grandfather and grandfather are stories I will take to my grave, and if possible, I have vowed to visit his home again before leaving for Japan. There was so much more I wanted to learn from the great man.

However, if I had thought those stories were the peak of my day, learning about Naruto's past - his birth as well as the connection to my family – seemed to make everything else insignificant. I knew he was nothing more than a baby when his father was brutally murdered, but I still tried to place myself in his shoes and to see how my life would have been if the situations were reversed. I had lost my parents after at least a few years of happy memories with them. Naruto had nothing of the sort to draw from. Yet compared to me, he was still able to smile and make friends easily as well as adapt to any new situation thrust upon him with an effortless ease I was slightly envious of. Of course now knowing the truth about the past has stoked those fires of revenge, but instead of ranting, raving and being angry with the world, his sights were set on two of the most powerful men in Japan. It was a battle that was completely foolish and unwise on paper, and yet whenever I looked at him and _saw_ the determination in those eyes, I realized that he was probably going to have the last laugh.

He was going to prove us doubters wrong – no matter how he went about doing it – for there was no doubt in my mind now that with Jiraiya on his side, Naruto was going to return to Japan to work for Danzo. It was a decision I would have chosen myself despite how dangerous it was bound to be. Still, I didn't know what was worse; knowing he'd be side-by-side with that bastard who could turn on him in a second, or that he'd be leaving much sooner than I was really ready for.

Not that I completely understood the latter part of my thinking. I mean...just what the hell was I so concerned about? It wasn't my job to babysit or protect Naruto from all harm, and besides, Itachi said there would be others there to help him should he be in trouble, and yet -

(I'd rather go with him)

If Danzo and Ikegami were eliminated would that make Orochimaru weaker and more susceptible to being overtaken by us? Somehow I doubted that, but at least, knowing those two were no longer in the picture would put him on guard and make things a little more difficult for us. Orochimaru was surely making Byaku-Shinkyou even more of a fortified fortress, so the faster we could get the blueprints to those spies working within the grounds, the better. So far, we've made copies of the originals and sent them via the 'intermediary' to my brother and Shisui. If the travel time was correct, they should be receiving it sometime tonight or tomorrow morning at the latest.

Those were the conflicting thoughts that plagued me for the most part until we were unceremoniously 'discarded' by Jiraiya outside a club that did not look too reputable. I had to remind myself that this man was a member of the _yakuza_ and an ex-boss at that, so it wasn't exactly strange to see him still dabbling in such behavior despite his age and supposed 'resignation'. Guess some old habits died hard.

What did have me baffled and incredibly frustrated (angry) was Naruto's decision to suddenly leave me for some random woman.

That sounds a little wrong when read, but you have to understand my reason for feeling that way. I had invited him to join me at a stall that sold weird-looking figurines. It had caught my attention on our way to the club, and I thought it would be a nice way to kick off the night considering it really was my first time going to a festival of this kind. You must remember that I tended to avoid most of the festivities that took place in Byaku-Shinkyou while growing up, hence the last real _fun_ festival I attended was as a child with my brother or mother in tow.

Hence assuming Naruto had followed me, imagine my disappointment and confusion when I turned around to ask him about something and he wasn't even there! To my chagrin – after much cursing and searching – I finally found him with that girl. _Really?_ He abandons and ignores me just to chase another skirt? Some mousy-looking thing that looked so frail, touching her was likely to have her snap in two like a twig? Were Naruto's tastes in girls really this bad or was he so determined to prove his manhood by choosing women that did not suit him? It really was arcane.

Left to me, I would have rather not had to tail him all night, but I was worried he'd slip up and do something stupid like reveal who he really was, or worse, decide to take her to a motel (or that club) for a 'good time'. If that was to happen, goodness knows I would have stepped in to stop things before they got out of hand. Fortunately, the outing seemed innocent enough, and the girl didn't force herself on him neither did he seem to talk much, which was also a good thing. His Korean was still shaky at best, despite the mini-lessons held during the days we worked on the blueprints. Unfortunately, this 'date' was beginning to tire me out, and I was about ready to interrupt especially with the sickening farewell scene. Just what the hell was she whispering to him about?

(goawaygoawaygoawaygoaway)

Even more annoying was the fact that he finally acknowledged I existed when we almost bumped into each other. I contemplated insulting him for being so obtuse, but decided it wasn't worth it and suggested we return home instead. His flippant refusal was really enough to set off the ticking time bomb inside of me, but the sudden explosion of the fireworks effectively diffused the situation.

(breathtaking)

When was the last time I saw fireworks this close and so magnificent? Ages it seems. Why I decided to open my mouth to tell Naruto about something like that, I had no idea. The anger and resentment that had been building while watching him with the girl now seemed petty and trivial. I knew I had already shared some of childhood memories with him, but perhaps it was because of his story today or just the atmosphere in general, I realized I wanted to tell him so much _more_ about myself. Though he would probably not care or show much interest, it was still good to know that you could talk to someone who just might understand a little bit about an internal pain that might never be healed.

I would later try to blame it on so many different things like say being on the bridge and the couples that were squeezed all around us. 'It' being my daring – yet incredibly stupid - decision to kiss him. It was an anomaly in itself and something the 'old' me would have balked at immediately. However, this 'new' me had relished the challenge with a fervor that was almost frightening.

I had always thought the Koreans were even more polite than the Japanese when it came to public displays of affection, so I assumed we were surrounded by foreigners since some had no qualms whatsoever in sharing intimate declarations of their feelings with embraces and kisses that had me squirming with discomfort. Naruto was still busy telling me about the girl he met; a topic that was slowly boring me to death. Just as long as he hadn't revealed anything about himself, I was fine, and yet...

(so damn annoying)

...the more he talked about her, the more this tightening sensation in my chest that made it slightly difficult to breathe, this pounding in my head, this sudden 20/20 vision that seemed to dissolve everything around us besides him. I studied his animated features beneath the intermittent sparkles of the fireworks. I wanted him to shut the hell up about this girl. I wanted him to focus only on me and nothing else but _me_. It was a turbulent swirl within – this jealous dark mass that reared its ugly head just waiting to be unleashed. It was an unreasonable side that still clung on to the notion that he had found me attractive _first_, so any other damn woman (or man) would and should pale in comparison.

Ah, how the great priests would cringe and cover their heads with ashes at my wayward thinking. Yet, it was safe to say that I _just didn't give a damn_ what they or the Great Book thought about me. And as he dared me with that blasted question of whether going out with her would bother me –

(yes it would you bastard)

...I did something I would later tell myself was only done out of impulse – nothing more than a damn compulsion.

(to test myself)

It wasn't the best kiss in the world; neither was it long enough to compare it to the only other series of kisses I had experienced with Ino. Would kissing a male be any different? Would his lips taste and feel revolting? Would I feel like scrubbing my lips clean and brushing my teeth until they bled? Would I want to regurgitate every thing I had eaten today?

No...it was absolutely none of the above and yet so much _more_.

It was the briefest of kisses and yet the most powerful in my life yet. It wasn't so much that he did anything special, since he wasn't expecting it, and I hadn't exactly given him much time to respond to it either. So why had it been that potent?

(soft yet firm, slightly salty yet oddly sweet)

It was enough to have my stomach and heart going through a severe case of butterfly-induced flutters, and it was all I could do not to reveal just how much my actions had affected me. I just couldn't _look_ at him any longer. How could I explain myself? What excuse could I possibly give for what I had just done? Mentally I braced myself for his wrath, for some kind of pain inflicted in the form of a blow, a slap or being kicked into the river. My so-called 'experiment' was about to backfire on me in the worst way and then –

"You call that a kiss, Uchiha Sasuke?"

_What?_

(oh fuck wha...what is he doing...is he kissing my ear? Biting it? Please...please...stop...not out here...)

I fought back a groan and lowered my lashes in helpless desire; shuddering as that all too familiar surge of electricity had me gripping the wooden railings for dear life. However, they flew open just as quickly at the husky timbre of his next words.

"When we get back home tonight, I plan on showing you how it's _really_ done."

_What in the -?_

Is he actually suggesting what I think he's suggesting? That he was going to...to...to...

The look of mischief on his features, the dark inscrutable look in his eyes (that sent my heart thumping even faster and harder) as well as his soft laughter as he spun on his heels and began to lead the way was enough to leave me in a confused mess. I literally couldn't move as the most decadent and sinful of images filled my vivid imagination. It was all well and good to fantasize to them in my solitude, but to think that _tonight_...that Naruto could actually finally let go of his inhibitions, doubts and fears to join me in a moment of intimacy we had both once considered repulsive – it was just too damn impossible to comprehend.

(please forgive me Oh Great One. Your humble son is about to be led astray)

With an effort, I finally forced myself to begin walking again, but even at that, my steps were slow and measured as the damn thoughts kept butting into my mind. Between the haunting echoes of the 'old' me wailing that this was all nothing more than the darkest of sins and that my tainted soul was bound for a place even worse than the pits of Hell, the 'new' me was already in thinking far ahead into the possible events of tonight, which was embarrassing in itself.

_How_ would we even do it? I mean...whatever it was he was planning to do to me that is. _Where_ would we do it? The only logical location would be his apartment, which would mean having to come up with some suitable excuse to Haku so he wouldn't worry about me. The roof wasn't too conducive. It might be early spring, but the idea of sitting (lying?) outside in the cold while trying to get intimate was not too appealing. So yes, I'm thinking he'd want to do it in his apartment, but then the question was...how the hell was he planning to start things off? From what he said, he made it seem like it was only going to be a much longer version of what had happened on the bridge. However, didn't most kisses tend to go on to something more than that? Was I really ready to have him go beyond and below my neck? To explore my flesh as Ino had done (or even Haku for that matter)? Could I really tolerate Naruto seeing me in such a vulnerable state? Or would I be plagued with Orochimaru's sadistic thrill at just how far I have sunk on the totem pole of his obscene teachings?

Biting my lower lip in worry, I looked up to study Naruto's back – since he was walking slightly ahead of me with hands in his pockets and what looked like a light bounce in his steps. What was he thinking about? Was he already planning ahead? Was he just as nervous and concerned as I was? Or wait...what if it was all a joke to him? What if he had only said that to see my reaction and really had no plans to follow through? What if I dared to go to his apartment and he'd do nothing more than laugh at my face and say just how 'weird' I really was thanks to being around 'Snake Dude' for so damn long. Could I really deal with the humiliation? Of course I'd probably kill him first, but for now, I really did have to stop thinking too ahead of myself.

Slapping myself mentally, I tried to focus on my surroundings, wondering why in the world it was taking us this long to get back to the club.

_What the hell?_

I stopped and looked around in confusion. This area looked very unfamiliar. We were on a sidewalk...still close to the river at least, but there were too many trees surrounding us, there were no stalls in the vicinity, and our only neighbors were a few homeless people sleeping beneath hedges and on the river bank. If I strained my ears hard enough, I could hear the sounds from the festival _behind_ us, which could only mean -

"Oy...Naruto," I called out with a headache beginning to form somewhere between my eyes and forehead. When he didn't stop, I all but snapped out his name. "NARUTO, you idiot! Stop! Where the hell are we?"

"Huh?" He finally halted and spun around with a raised brow of bemusement. Frustrated beyond belief at his cluelessness, I waved my hand around me.

"Does any of this look familiar to you?" I asked impatiently. "You led us the wrong way. You probably went the opposite side of the bridge, you dolt!"

"Why are you snapping at me?" came the defensive reply, though he was doing a good job trying to hide his panic as he gazed around him quickly. "It's not as if I know the place too well. You could have stopped me earlier. Why weren't you paying attention either?"

I tried to give a coherent reply, but knew it was partly my fault for not being too observant. I had been so lost in my stupid thoughts, we were probably now at the other end of town. _Good grief._ I have to do every damn thing around here–

"Where are you going?" he asked. I could hear him jogging to catch up to me.

"Where do you think?" I hissed back. "I'm going back the way we came. I swear you really are hopeless without my guidance." This part was muttered beneath my breath. I couldn't believe how absent-minded I had been, and as I made a turn to what I assumed was the way back to the park, I was bewildered to find that the sounds of the festivities seemed even further away. Fuck! Was it just the wind playing tricks on me?

_Okay...steady now, Sasuke. Calm down and think. Think. Think. Think! _

I closed my eyes and lifted my head to the heavens; trying to gauge the wind's direction as best I could. I could feel it whistling past me from the right side, and yet the sounds were coming from my left. A tricky illusion for those not able to –

"Urgh!"

My lashes flew open; my body promptly going into defensive mode on autopilot. One minute I was standing, the next I was almost head first into the hedge of bushes beside the sidewalk. The pain from the bump or whatever it was that had hit me soon settled in on my right shoulder, and it took me a second later to see the cause and reason for it.

_Shit. Just what I didn't need._

"Aaaa?" came the low drawl that was followed my sniggers from the others behind him. There were five of them in all amidst the sickening stench of alcohol and cigarette smoke. They were relatively average-sized men wearing outfits that could only signify they were part of some gang. Sleeveless tees, jeans that hung too low on their hips, interesting tattoos, silver/metal chains, piercings and God knows what else they've got sticking out of their flesh, as well as hair in arrays of colors and styles ranging from Mohawks to tattooed bald scalps. The leader – the one who had bumped into me – was the most colorful of them all. His Mohawk was a rather eye-catching kaleidoscope of neon reds, blue, greens and yellows, just about every orifice on his face was pierced and even when he stuck out his tongue, there was a silver ball bearing wedged in it. A cigarette dangled from the corner of his thick lips, which curved upward as he openly leered at me. I didn't have to 'see' to know that he was one of those bastards that I had seen one too many times during my beat as a captain. How many of his kind had I sentenced to some form of labor back then?

_Disgusting._

"Looks like we've got ourselves a pretty one," he finally drawled in his native tongue as he took a step closer to me...or would have if Naruto didn't suddenly appear from nowhere to block his path. Unbeknownst to him, I did have weapons on me (and no it wasn't my crutch), but two of Haku's smaller throwing knives hidden in the pockets of my jeans. Though I had no problem taking out one or two of these guys as a warning, I still knew it wasn't conducive to get into a fight as Itachi and Shisui's warning to stay out of trouble began to ring like hell in my mind. However, I definitely wasn't prepared to have Naruto stepping in to _defend_ me. Or at least it looked that way.

"Sorry," he began in broken Korean with a sheepish smile on his visage and bow of his head like a suppliant nerd. "Uum...we go now. We no bother you...ah...um -"

I tugged on his arm and began to drag him away before he said something stupid in the language. The guys had been staring at him as if he was from another planet, and the longer we stuck around to chit chat, the more aggravated and eager for a fight they'd become.

"Let's go," I hissed beneath my breath. "Remember what Itachi said. No getting into trouble."

"I was just apologizing to them," he hissed back although he came along willingly enough. "Though it doesn't like it's helping much."

"What do you mean by -?"

"Weeeeoooooo!" came the sudden cry as – and I swear I'm not making this up – one of them literally flung like a monkey from one of the tree branches to drop before us with a loud thump. Those boots he was wearing must have weighed a ton or close to it for they were that loud on the pavement. He remained on his haunches and leered up at us, before pulling out a switch blade and licking it slowly.

"Where do you think you're going?" he crooned in Korean. I could feel the others crowding around us, now taunting and teasing us with crude comments that I was almost glad Naruto couldn't understand. Although from the darkening expression on his visage, you didn't need a translator to tell you that there were obviously being assholes. The monkey began to slash the air before me with the knife, moving closer and closer until I was sure he would take off a slice of my chest. Somebody else shoved Naruto roughly away from me, and I only had enough time to throw him a quick glance as if to beg him to bear with whatever these bastards planned to do until they got tired and left us alone.

"What do you want?" I asked as politely as I could. "We don't have much money on us."

They cackled in response just as another reached out to confiscate my crutch. To my growing fury, he began to wave it over his head like a talisman of some sort; chanting something that escaped me but obviously hilarious to his buddies. As if that wasn't bad enough, with a loud cry, the son-of-a-bitch threw it right into the river! I didn't know how deep it was, but with the loud splash, I knew I was never going to see or use it again.

(deep breaths deep breaths deep breaths)

"What the hell did you do that for, you fucking pieces of shit?" Naruto exploded in Japanese...which was a big mistake. The change in their expressions was more than enough to tell me that these guys were not exactly fond of their neighbors across the ocean, and it was none more obvious when the leader stepped up to deliver a jaw jarring blow to Naruto's torso which took the wind out of his sails. He would have crumpled to the ground, but two of the men held him up for their boss to take out his frustrations on him.

The thudding in my head began to throb harder and faster as I watched him fit a pair of jagged-edged brass knuckles onto his right hand. If that thing went into Naruto, they were going to strip him right down to the bone. I knew I would have to move fast. I still had the monkey swinging his knife before me, and though I was without crutches, and though my leg was still aching from all the walk so far today -

"Hold him steady!" the leader commanded and raised his fist.

...I lashed out with my left leg to send the fool with the switch blade flying into the hedges, while withdrawing one of the throwing knives and aiming right for the leader's wrist. I wasn't as accurate as Haku, but if the howl of pain from the guy was any indication, I had done some kind of damage. I would only have enough time to watch him fall to his knees and clutch his bleeding hand to his chest, where I could see my knife sticking out from it, when another commotion had me looking up quickly. Naruto had finally gotten a second wind. He seemed to duck and yet heave himself up at the same time; using his head to butt it hard into one of the guy's torsos. The move was so unexpected, both men released him at the same time, but Naruto wasn't satisfied. He drove a fist into the other guy's face and would have gone for him again, when a familiar and chill-inducing sound had us all freezing at once.

Police sirens.

_Shit! Shit! Shit! Not good at all!  
><em>

"Naruto!" I cried out as I waved for him to follow me quickly. The gang members must have had their run-ins with the law as well because they too were scrambling up and away, but not before spitting and cursing us for not being the best victims they could possibly have.

_Better luck next time, shitheads. You picked the wrong couple tonight._

"You okay?" Naruto panted as he reached out to assist me. Damn it! Never wished I'd want to use that stupid crutch more than ever right now.

"I'll live," I replied though I was inspecting him as well to see if he was hurt anywhere else; not that I could see much with the dark shadows around us. "I lost Haku's knife though. He's not going to be very happy when he finds out."

We looked at each other for a second before bursting into helpless giggles at how ridiculous it all seemed. We had almost gotten ourselves killed tonight, and we were only concerned about how Haku would feel about his –

"Hold it right there!" came the sudden loud command behind us.

Like deer caught in headlights, and we probably were with all the sudden glare of flashlights trained on both of us, Naruto and I turned and squinted with muttered curses as we barely made out our new and very unwelcome visitors.

"Ah hell," Naruto muttered beside me with a sigh of resignation. "Deja freakin' vu all over again."

"I'll talk to them," I said with a firm nod. We had done nothing wrong...technically. We were the ones accosted by those bastards. All I had to do was make them see that we were the innocent victims and we'd be allowed to go free with nothing more than a warning.

What could be so difficult in that?

* * *

><p>"FUCK!"<p>

"Your first time in a jail then?"

"Shut up, Naruto," I growled and slammed a fist against the cold steel bars in barely controlled fury. The officer on duty – he looked like he as in his late thirties - lifted his head from the girly magazine he was reading, snapped his chewing gum loudly and smirked in derision.

"Keep making noise, you idiot," he drawled lazily. "I'll take you down to the basement soon enough."

"I demand to speak to your supervising officer," I stated icily.

"Give it up, Sasuke," Naruto sighed behind me. I couldn't believe he was taking this all in stride. This was humiliating! "You're no longer in Japan remember? None of these fuckers give a damn who you are, and besides, even if you did tell them, they might rat you out."

"It still doesn't make it right!" I snarled. "Even after I told them everything, they still hurled us off!" My wrists were still smarting from the tight handcuffs clamped on them earlier.

"They needed scapegoats, and we were available." He shrugged; hands beneath his head on a probably rat-infested thin mattress in a cell that was barely big enough for one person let alone the two of us. It stank of stale beer and urine, and considering there was a little puddle next to a tiny washbasin in the corner, how was I to know it wasn't actually urine I could be stepping in? The walls were the color of slate on which former prisoners had been so kind enough to redecorate with some colorful language. I had visited a few prisons on the 'outside' while an officer, but I couldn't remember any of them looking this terrible.

This was beneath me.

And yet Naruto was right. In this small police station in the middle of a city where no-one knew who we were and we weren't even allowed to make a phone call, I was a complete and utter _nobody_. They did not care about my former status or my ancestral lineage. To them I was nothing more than a foreign troublemaker. I would have to spend the night in this hellhole or pray for a miracle of some sort to occur to get us out of here.

I peered through the bars again to examine the station. It really was small, with an entrance which led to a cramped lobby that could only hold about five chairs, to the 'front desk' where the officer on duty was currently working hard at reading his stupid magazine. Our cell was directly across him, and I counted only four more cells – with one of them occupied by a man sound asleep. A large notice board was crammed with posts and notices about wanted criminals, curfews, information, warnings and other police-speak I was all too familiar with. The _mon_ of their force was not that much different from ours, but it was still jarring to the senses not to see the familiar Uchiha fan on the walls or on his uniform. Photographs of prominent members of the force lined the gray walls; none of them really recognizable. This only brought me back to my humiliating experience of being handcuffed and shoved into their filthy police vehicle, despite my pleas for them to understand we weren't at fault.

I guess we didn't help our cause after they patted us down and noticed we were armed. When Naruto's handgun had been removed, that seemed to seal the deal for them. We were definitely going to be spending the night here come hell or high water.

_Fuck. Fuck. Fuck!_

"Can I at least make a phone call?" I asked for the one millionth time.

The officer only pretended to yawn and flipped to the next page causing my fingers to tighten around the steel bars. I wanted to choke the life out of him. Where the hell were the other officers? I could have sworn there were at least four more during our arrest. Guess they were back out patrolling.

I remained stubbornly at the bars for at least another half hour until my leg simply couldn't take it anymore. I had put it through enough for one day, but I didn't want to give the idiotic officer the pleasure of knowing he had 'won' our little battle. With a final sullen glare in his direction, I limped back to the bed – there was no other place to sit – and nudged Naruto's feet to get him to make some room for me.

"Don't even say anything," I cut in before he could open his mouth to make some snide comment about getting a taste of my own medicine. He dutifully kept shut, but I could still see the smile he was trying to control.

Impossible to believe that a couple of hours earlier, I had been fantasizing about something that seemed so damn inconsequential now. I was in absolutely no fucking mood to even contemplate touching another human being except to inflict some serious pain. At least I could take pleasure in knowing that gang leader would be needing some stitches on his hand (let's see him wear another brass knuckle again), and the other was probably going to be nursing a serious bruise or a few broken ribs from my kick. I would be a liar if I didn't admit that a part of me actually relished the fight. It had been so long since I had been in any kind of combat, I was afraid I was losing my touch. I was glad to see my reflexes were still intact. I just had to work on being even faster than ever before.

"Hey...Sasuke?"

"What?" I grumbled. I had closed my eyes; my head leaning against the wall as I tried to keep awake. It really has been a long day all things considered.

"I've been thinking -"

"Shocking concept for you, I'm sure."

"Shut the fuck up and listen. You did a really dickish move earlier in the evening, you know that?"

I lifted my lashes to give him a side glance in confusion. "What dickish move? What does that even mean?"

"Just after Jiraiya left us, you just went off on your own without telling me anything. Would it have killed you to tell me you wanted to go do some stuff on your own?" He was still laying as if bored with the world, but the look in his eyes told me that it really had bothered him. But then again –

"I _did_ tell you where I was going," I replied with a shake of my head. "You were either not paying attention or didn't hear me."

"No you didn't -"

"I specifically asked "Can we go see that stall over there? I noticed some strange figurines." It's not my fault that you're deaf."

There was a brief silence before he returned with a mumbled. "Shoulda waited for me anyway. You don't just go walking and assuming I'll follow."

"We're supposed to stick together, remember?" I shrugged. "What does it matter anyway? You had fun with your date for the evening, so that's that." I closed my eyes again and intended the drop the subject. We both knew damn well what had happened after that, and suddenly being in this cramped space was too stifling. I wondered if I could request to be put into another cell.

"...if Jiraiya will finally figure we've not returned," Naruto was muttering.

"We should be so lucky," I mumbled back. I was sure that man was too lost in his throes of passion with his whores; we'd be stuck here all night anyway.

"Hey! Hey! Hey!" came the sudden sound of disgruntlement that was followed by the aggravating sound of a _wakizashi_ being struck against the bars. "Stop hatching some plot, you stupid Japanese! You think you can come here and take over our city too? We'll stop you and your evil plans! You'll see!"

"What the fuck's he so mad about?" Naruto asked with a raised brow.

"He's crazy," I replied with a shrug. "He thinks we're hatching some evil plot to take over his country." I eyed the officer. He was still loitering outside the cell; having decided his magazine was no longer of interest. I squinted a little to _see_ his aura and wasn't all that disappointed. It was a murky hue; a sign that he was clearly not too happy in his position, but had to do this to make himself look good for his bosses. I cannot begin to tell you how many such men I've come across over the years. It really was pitiful.

Naruto smirked and suddenly sat up; a mischievous glint in his eye. "Hey...wanna make him even more pissed off?"

"Naruto," I began quietly but firmly. "As fun as this is for you, I really have no intention of being sent to some basement or dealing with his psychotic thinking just so you can have your kicks."

He grinned and moved closer still to begin whispering in my ear. I did my best to listen, but at the same time, it was hard to concentrate much considering just hours earlier, his lips had done something else that was still sending tiny shivers of delight down my spine. I bit my lower lip and forced myself to pay attention, and when he was done, he sat back with satisfaction and that same shit-eating grin on his face.

This guy was –

"Well?" he asked. "Might as well kill time."

"...this could backfire on us..." I was trying to make him see reason, but the more I thought about it, the more I realized I _did_ want to go along with this harebrained idea of his. I wanted to get back at the smug officer anyway possible and this was a nice way to fuck with his mind.

"They think we're crazy, right?" Naruto was saying as he rose to his feet and began to pace the cell. "Let's show them how crazy we really are then."

The officer, who had turned his back to head to his desk, spun around with a raised brow as he noticed Naruto's antics. He frowned and moved closer to the cell.

"Hey! You! Stop walking about like that!" He pounded the bars with his _wakizashi_ again. At the loud sound, Naruto suddenly spun around with a snarl and just about flung himself at the bars like a rabid dog. I really wanted to burst into laughter, just as the officer gave a frightened squeak and dropped his sword, but I remembered I had a role to play in all this. Naruto was beginning to shake the cell bars, still snarling and foaming a little at the mouth. You'd really believe he had lost his mind.

I rose to my feet and said something in gibberish to Naruto. It was a sort of command thing, but Naruto 'understood' and stepped away from the bars...but just far enough. He was now crouched like a beast waiting to explode, and with a dramatic sigh, I wagged a finger at him and told him to behave himself. That the nice officer was trying to help us and we couldn't have him getting all upset. Naruto pretended to look contrite and batted his lashes at me. I pet his head gently and to my chagrin (and inner delight I had to admit), he went as far as licking the back of my hand gently.

(dear God in heaven)

"What...what's wrong with him?" the officer asked shakily as he bent to pick his sword. "What is he?"

I sighed again and turned to the man with a raised brow; speaking to him as if speaking to an imbecile. "He's my pet. He gets like this whenever he's locked up in a cage."

"But he wasn't like that earlier."

"That's because it's been a while since he's been in such a place. When you started hitting the cell with your sword, you triggered some bad memories." I pretended to be scowl at the inconsiderate man, while 'my pet' crouched beside me and tried to snarl and look contrite at the same time. I allowed him to hold onto my hand, which he would kiss tenderly every now and then.

(concentrate Sasuke concentrate concentrate)

"...oh...really?" came the wary question. The officer peered at Naruto as if never seeing him before. "You know...I've actually heard of people like this."

Huh? What the hell is he going on about now?

He dared to purse his lips in thought as if trying to recall something. "Ah yes, I remember now. Those children that are born in the wild and then brought to civilization. He's something like that, right? He's one of those wild creatures, right?"

He pointed at Naruto with the sword and on cue; Naruto leaped up and tried to pry the weapon out of the officer's hand. Again, I scolded Naruto for his behavior while literally having to bite my inner cheek at how terrified the older man looked now.

"There, there now," I said softly as I ran my fingers through the spiky blond tresses and tipped his chin to stare into blue-green eyes (he was wearing his contacts), that looked sufficiently worshipful. I could very well tell him to roll over right now and he'd happily do it if he wanted to keep up this charade. "It's going to be all right," I continued in that same quiet tone as I dared to caress his lips with a finger. "The big bad man won't be bothering us any more, okay?"

He nodded and sucked on my finger gently; a motion I had definitely not expected and which elicited an uncharacteristic gasp of pleasure from my lips.

"Did he bite you?" came the panicked query from the man I had almost forgot existed.

I struggled to find the right words; finding myself still mesmerized by Naruto's darkened expression. Act or not, he knew exactly what he was doing to me. I tightened my grip on his hair in retaliation; relishing in the soft hiss of pain he gave as I finally forced myself to look at the officer again.

"I'm okay, but...please don't make that annoying sound again. If he decides to bite you, I can't stop him."

Not looking too convinced, he stepped away with a slow nod of understanding; though I had the feeling he was going to be making some phone calls and demanding we be moved to the basement or put in cells with electric bars to shock Naruto should he try growling again. They simply couldn't have wild Japanese beasts roaming around their city.

However, as luck would have it, we needn't have bothered carrying on with our charade anymore. In less than half-an-hour, the police station was suddenly a beehive of activity as Jiraiya arrived with two other officers in tow. I guess I shouldn't have been surprised that he was fluent in the language, because he all but went into a torrent of demands to the flustered officer (who now looked smaller and more insecure than ever) in the older man's presence. Naruto had returned to normal and was all but kissing the ground in relief at the sight of his new guardian. However, in the midst of all the organized chaos, it was the silent black-haired man, dressed in a clean-cut black suit – that caught my attention. It wasn't so much his paleness as it was the fact that he looked like a mix of Chinese and Japanese and even Korean. He could have easily blended into any setting without drawing attention to himself. However, there was something _familiar_ about him that was like a nagging jab at the back of my mind. I felt I ought to know who he was, but I just couldn't place a finger on it.

"You boys will be the death of me. It's a good thing Buk-gu is such a small city compared to Seoul," Jiraiya grumbled as we were shepherded into a waiting taxi, while the police officers bowed and asked for our continuous forgiveness. Jiraiya definitely laid it on them... or paid them off; not that the latter would have surprised me. It was the _yakuza_ mentality after all.

Meanwhile the pale, dark-haired man (he couldn't be any older than Naruto and I) had positioned himself in the front seat as if he belonged there.

"If it wasn't for Sai, I would never have known what happened," Jiraiya was saying.

"Sai?" Naruto asked with a raised brow. "Who's that?" He was clutching his weapons (as well as my knife) like long lost children. The officers had been 'nice' enough to return those to us as well.

Jiraiya cuffed Naruto gently and pointed to the man who gave us a small smile via the rear-view mirror. "_That_ is Sai. He works at the club and was on his way back from an errand when he noticed you both being arrested. He recognized you two as my companions and let me know quickly, so you should both be thanking him for his swift thinking. How could you allow yourself to get caught up in something like that?"

Both of us speaking at the same time, we tried to explain to Jiraiya exactly what had happened. It was a miracle he was able to understand what we were saying, but at least he got the gist of it.

"Bottom line," he said as the taxi pulled up to our building. "You both had a night you'll never forget, eh?"

I felt my cheeks burn at the different connotations his question conjured up, but didn't stick around to give him an answer choosing instead of thank him again for his benevolence in purchasing a new set of crutches for me. I knew he wanted to say something more to Naruto, so I excused myself to head into the building. However, before I even got past the gates, I felt the hair at the back of my neck prickle with awareness. Something or someone was watching me, and turning around quickly, I caught the pair of dark eyes trained squarely on me and making no attempt to look away either.

_Sai, huh?_

He gave a little wave and a light bow of his head which I reciprocated albeit warily. There was something about that guy –

"What a night! What a night! What a night!" Naruto was singing off key as the taxi finally drove off. I was worried he'd get the neighbors awake with how loud he was, but I guess I shouldn't have worried. The place was dead to the world except for a dog in his kennel, who only cracked open an eye to peer at the noisy duo before going back to sleep.

"Whaaat a niiight! Have fun, Sasuke?"

"Yes...my pet."

I smirked as he burst into loud laughter. Smiling softly as he went on to recount the incidents at the station with some added dramatic effects.

"I can't wait to tell Shika and the others," he began as he punched in the number to our floor. The elevator doors shut us in, and though I'd like to tell you it was an intimate setting; the stench was not exactly the kind to get one in that sort of mood. I couldn't wait to escape.

"Why do we have to tell them?" I asked.

"Because it's funny, and they'll want to know what the hell we did all day anyway."

"It's almost one in the morning," I replied with a raised brow. "Who has the time to listen to your story? Besides...you can't tell anyone about...you know..."

"What? That you kissed me?" he blurted out so unexpectedly my initial reaction was to slap my hand over his mouth while my features burned with embarrassment.

"That and the whole pet thing!" I hissed. His eyes lit up with mischief and at the sensation of his tongue gently licking my palm, I withdrew quickly and tried to smack him, but he ducked and tugged me out of the elevator just as it finally came to a stop on our floor.

"Naruto," I began with a low growl. "I swear if you tell...ouch...what are you...mmmpfff!"

(oh God yes)

The hallway was blissfully empty. The only sounds coming from the cooling systems and the faint laughter from the television in Karin's room, but all that paled in comparison - simply melted to nothingness - as the pain from suddenly being pushed hard against a wall to my lips being seized, claimed and controlled by this...this..._beast_ - promptly ceased all rational thought processes.

I didn't bother questioning or arguing the wisdom of what we were doing but chose to give in without much of a fight. If anyone was to walk out right now, we would have no suitable excuse to conjure up, not that I gave a shit if that happened anyway. I had craved this for so long and _finally_ I was experiencing something I had only thought would be nothing more than a frustrated fantasy for the rest of my life.

He was not gentle, and I didn't want him to be that way either. Being gentle was something to be reserved for those of the opposite sex. I wanted to _devour_ his passion; this fevered intensity that burned right through me and left me breathless and needing more. His tongue found its way into my mouth; hard, fast and rough against mine as our bodies writhed against each other's with a pleasure that deepened by the second. He had my hands clasped tightly and pinned against the wall at either side of my head, though he soon released one only to cup my neck and jaw as if hoping to hold me steady. I guess that was a good idea for my knees were barely holding me up, and though the throbbing in my leg was now a ghost of itself, another stronger and much more pleasurable ache was building between them. One that I was ashamed to admit I'd probably have to finish off myself if he only planned to kiss me.

(more...want so much more)

"Fuck...Sas...Sasuke..." came the winded gasp as we finally broke apart for air, though we barely pulled apart. We breathed into each other, our gazes feverish and heated as we struggled to make sense of just what was happening between us. I licked my lips slowly, feeling my already thudding heart skip a beat as he followed the movement with a hunger that turned me on even more. The expression on his face told me everything. He was just as eager as I was; to explore...to see how far we could take this...to see if we could push the envelope just a step further and satisfy our curiosity once and for all. There would be no promises of everlasting love; that much was a given. This was nothing more than pure physical attraction; an attraction that had to be sated tonight.

"May...maybe I shou...should let you go," he stuttered weakly. He gave me a shy smile while his fingers continued to wreck havoc on my senses as they kept on caressing my neck and jaw tenderly. "It's been a long day...your leg..."

"I want to come to your apartment."

It was an order with no room for him to back away. Seeing his eyes widen at my bold declaration would have had me blushing at my daring if it wasn't for the distraction of his hips pressing against mine and the undeniable friction we were creating with the restrictive cloth between us.

"What about...Haku?" he asked warily, and as if to emphasize the point, he glanced toward my apartment. I placed a hand beneath his chin to force his attention back to me.

"Make it fast then," I invited firmly; knowing exactly what he meant. If Haku woke up in the middle of the night to find me 'missing,' he was likely to go banging on all the doors to find his dear master. Whatever we planned to do, it had to be as discreet and as quickly as possible.

With a nod and another kiss that all but left me short of breath, he staggered away from me and fumbled with his keys...dropped them with a loud clatter -

"Shssh! You'll wake up everyone!" I whispered harshly as he apologized and tried to control his trembling. Luckily, the other doors still remained closed and when he finally got his open, I all but pushed him inside and kicked it shut behind us.

"Sasuke...wait...mmmm..."

I couldn't. I didn't want to. It was dark in here except for the thin thread of light from a street lamp peeking through the blinds, but it was more than enough for me as it was my turn to take him by surprise. I trapped him against the door and allowed myself to taste him for as long and as deep as I wanted. He moaned into my mouth, shuddering as I began to trail my hands down his chest. However, at his barely concealed wince, I was sharply reminded of just what had taken place earlier.

Damn. In my haste to consume him, I forgot he had been dealing with the after effects of that gang leader's blow all this time.

"Hold on," I muttered as I searched for the switch and flipped it on. We both blinked quickly to get adjusted to the light, before I lifted his shirt to see the damage. Good God. Sure enough, there was a light purple and red bruise forming just below his right breast, and if it wasn't taken care of soon, it could become ugly.

"Do you have a first aid kit in here?" I asked; fighting down the adrenaline rush of lust to focus on much needed treatment.

"I don't know," he replied. He looked flushed, dishelved and a little out-of-sorts. He licked his swollen lips to croak out the rest of his reply. "You can check the restroom if you want."

"Take off your shirt and wait for me," I commanded while taking off my shoes and outer shirt. I soon realized how my order had sounded when I was in the restroom. I really should learn how to phrase things better especially in such ...heavy situations.

I couldn't really find any first aid kit, so settled for filled a small bowl with warm water, a wash cloth and an ointment for sores. They would have to do for now. In the morning, Karin could treat him properly.

"No first aid kit," I began as I stepped back into the room, where he had not only taken off his jacket and shirt, but was also now barefoot and setting up his futon. Oh dear.

"Figured," he replied with a sheepish smile. "What do you have there then?"

"Uh..." I shook my head and forced myself to focus. "Just water and this ointment. I'll...just...wipe you down and that's all I can do until Karin takes a look at it."

"Okay...so...eh...how do we do this?"

The washcloth I was holding dropped into the bowl from fingers that trembled, and it was only when he explained himself (as in position I wanted to be in so I would be most comfortable) did I finally let out a small breath of relief. _Good grief! _Why was I suddenly this tense? Less than ten minutes ago, I was ready to pounce on him, and now...perhaps beneath the lights and with more time to process my overzealous libido...I realized I wasn't really as brave as I thought I was. It was one thing having a woman offer herself to you willing. However, I had to remind myself that Naruto was _not_ Ino and would _never_ be Ino. I had to stop comparing him to her while we were together. I _had_ to get into the mindset of this being another _male_...someone like _me_. This would mean treating him as I would like to be treated when it came to the concept of pleasuring oneself.

_We are but fallen creatures, and our spiritual life on earth is warfare. Sin is our enemy. We must shun all desires of the flesh._

"Ouch..."

"Sorry," I whispered and patted the wound as gently as I could. We were sitting on the futon and facing each other, though his legs were crossed and mine were outstretched. Except for the sound of me squeezing out the washcloth every now and then, and his soft winces of pain, only our breathing seemed to interfere with the silence. I stubbornly kept my eyes on his bruise, willing that incessant voice within me to slither away. The 'old' me had seen enough of my wanton behavior tonight and was now forcing its will upon me; reminding me of doctrines and teachings I had once kept close to my heart. I wasn't supposed to be here with this...

(sinner)

...this man. I wasn't supposed to want to kiss away the bruise, to savor it and perhaps heal it with my lips and tongue. I wasn't supposed to want to taste those lips again; to feel them crushed hard against mine, to revel in the sensation of his tongue plunging yet teasing mine, to capture his lower lip between my teeth gently and to suck on them until he begged for mercy. I wasn't supposed to feel this steady rush of heat, or to shiver as I watched (as if from miles away) as his hand slowly reached up to clasp my trembling one.

"Sasuke?" he asked in a voice that said so much in that one call of my name. He wanted me to look at him, but I couldn't any longer. My gaze was still fixed somewhere along his jaw line even when he interlocked our fingers and the washcloth fell to the futon between us. Even as he moved in closer to rest his heated forehead upon my shoulder as if afraid to show his face to me as well. Even as he whispered my name again and I felt his lips on the area where I had been bumped (which actually still stung a little), I remained immobile...simply frozen.

I wanted to flee, and yet I wanted to stay with him...like this...for as long as I could.

"Just say it, Sasuke," he whispered. "And...and I'll let you go. I'm just as nervous you know," he confessed against the soft cloth of my shirt. "I haven't exactly allowed any guy to...you know..."

"Do you want me to go?" I asked through lips that felt heavy. My heart was beating a wild staccato in my chest; threatening to burst right through at any second. "What...what do you want me to do, Naruto?"

"Stay."

It was only one word; barely audible in the tension-filled silence but still enough to have me closing my eyes and finally stilling the countless doubts within me. He was just as vulnerable as I was, and yet he wasn't going to show me the door.

(thank you)

I forced his head up with a gentle nudge and made myself look into his eyes- eyes no longer hidden behind the layer of fake green lenses. And like that day, on that cold bitter day in a courtyard at Byaku-Shinkyou when I had seen what was truly within this man's heart, I allowed myself the pleasure of _seeing_ him all over again. No longer weighed down by Orochimaru's presence, my overwhelming devotion to duty and rules, and the need to be perfect, I _looked_ **into** Uzumaki Naruto and immediately felt an inexplicable sensation in my chest. It felt crushing and intense, so much so I literally had to suck in a deep breath to control the sudden wave of vertigo that washed over me. I clutched his upper arms tightly; barely hearing his tentative call of my name as I blindly sought and found what I was looking for. I swallowed my name in our kiss; consumed it and made it mine with a groan that seemed wretched from my depths.

I cannot remember how my shirt was removed, but I do remember feeling incredibly embarrassed when I was slowly pushed back onto the futon and Naruto was half-lying upon me. I wanted to tell him to stop looking at me with that strange expression on his visage, but his next softly-spoken words were enough to make me want to clobber and yet hug him tightly.

"I knew having a crush on you was no mistake after all. You really still are the prettiest non-chick I've ever met."

(damn right I am)

He was surprisingly gentle – or dare I say careful – with me. I was tempted to tell him I wouldn't break as he planted shy kisses on my collarbone and shoulders where he paid particular attention to the faint bruise that had formed from the hard bump. I shivered at the way he licked at it, gasping in barely complete sentences that I was planning to return the favor, to which he chuckled in response. He pinched my already hardened nipples none too gently, promptly sending sharp pangs of gratification down my spine to my toes that curled into the futon in delighted response. I didn't want to cry out as he began to suck on them, though I could tell he was simply gauging my responses to see if he was even doing the right thing or not. I tried to encourage him whenever he'd stop and ask if I was okay.

"I won't break," I finally panted irritably. "In case you haven't noticed yet, I'm not a girl."

"Oh really?" he smirked and (fuck!) squeezed the bulge between my legs in a move that completely threw me off guard. The gall of that - !

(felt so damn good!)

"I wouldn't have known with this thing poking me all night," he teased.

"It was not...I was not...po..." I couldn't finish because he had squeezed me again as well as captured my already sensitive nipple between his teeth at the same time. I clutched the roots of his hair and bit back a cry, wishing he'd stop as his strokes began to get harder, bolder, rougher...stronger.

()

"Nar...Naruto..." I gasped and bucked my hips upward to meet his crude attack on my sensitive nether region. The familiar surge of heat that always came when I was close to an orgasm was fast approaching. I tried to think of other things to prevent it from coming so soon, but Naruto knew just what to do to send me off the edge. For a guy who had never done this before, he was being merciless with his control of me.

_Stop...please...I can't..._

Was that me? Was that really my voice? Was I the one who sounded close to sobbing as I felt my now rigid penis and balls threatening to rip right through the cloth? Was I the one who –

(oh no!)

"Wha...what...why did you stop?" I gasped helplessly as he raised himself up a little to unzip his pants.

"Together," was all he managed to say for he himself wasn't doing too well in the control department I could see. He was trembling as bad as I was. Our ragged and shallow breathing was oddly synchronized as he positioned himself again and gently guided my hand to a part of him that I never thought – in my wildest dreams – that I'd ever get to touch. Not just him...any other man for that matter.

It felt so warm...huge..._alive_ in my grip. For a panic-filled second, I had absolutely no clue what to do with the throbbing mass of hard flesh, which was already slick with the creamy drops of his pre-cum. Forcing myself to squash down the prissy side of me that was slightly disgusted at the sensation, all thoughts of uncertainty were crushed as he reciprocated the gesture by wrapping his warm fingers around my penis before whispering shakily into my ear.

"Do whatever you want, Sasuke."

It was the best and worst suggestion he could possibly make. With no hindrance between us now, we were free to bring each other to completion the best way we knew how. We had surely masturbated in our private moments many times in the past, and it was more than obvious in how Naruto seemed to know exactly which places to touch and stroke to drive me to the brink of madness. I did my best to keep up, showing him that I too knew how good it felt to bring yourself to the peak of that 'summit', and I wanted nothing more than to see his expression when he finally let go. I forced myself to control my groans of pleasure and concentrated on _listening_ to him instead. I was not sure if this was ever going to happen between us again, and I wanted to memorize every single second; to burn every sound and motion this man made into my memory banks so I would never forget.

He had called me pretty, but I couldn't say the same for him on any other occasion. Naruto was not ugly either, and I have mentioned how his smile seemed to make him light up from within. He was not pretty. He was not ugly, but as I lifted my lashes to look at him now...

(Naruto...you really are...)

...never had anyone looked more _beautiful_ to me. It was almost terrifying to feel this way for another man, but he was conjuring up emotions within me that I had never felt before. He was flushed with his desire, his warm breath bathing my skin as he whispered my name like a mantra with his eyes squeezed shut. I could feel him swell in my hand and I knew he was oh-so-very close to his breaking point. Smiling, I hooked my good leg around his to make us switch positions, only to swallow his gasp of surprise in a torrid kiss that was intensified as I stroked him harder still. He squirmed beneath me and almost gave up the attempt to make me come. I was the one in charge now, and I was the one responsible for this helpless creature who was completely at my mercy.

I, shamelessly, relished this feeling of _power_.

He begged me to ease up on him with a choked cry; a couple of tears breaking through his shut lids which I lapped up thirstily. I traced my tongue down his sweat-flushed face, down to the hollow of his neck where I proceeded to return the favor he had given me weeks ago. I was going to give him the mother of all hickeys – a mark to show any future girl that happened to catch his attention that he was and had already been taken. He thrashed beneath me and bucked his hips; slamming them hard into mine and causing our erections to collide in the most toe-curling way ever.

"You son-of-a-bitch," he panted with a pitiful whine that made me grin against his reddened flesh. I knew he was about to explode, but I was preventing him from doing so by squeezing the base of his penis and torturing him even further. It was a trick I used whenever I wanted to prolong my orgasm. "Sasuke...please..."

"Please what?" I asked huskily as I slowly licked the bruise I had created. It was a nice hickey all things considered.

"...co...come..."

"Can't hear you."

"Ihateyou," he growled and in retaliation squeezed my cock as well. I bit back a moan and lifted my head to look at him.

"What was that again?" I asked with a smirk and pinched his left nipple hard enough to elicit another soft cry from him. "Say it, Naruto."

"I want...I want to come," he begged. "Please..." His hooded lashes barely revealed the darkened blue eyes that shimmered with tears of desperation. I was getting a sick thrill from watching him this way, and would have loved to continue this foreplay, but even I was barely hanging on at this point.

"Together," I finally croaked against his bruise – this time the one from the gang leader's punch. I licked the skin I had washed earlier and placed a tender kiss on it. His violent shiver and small choked sob was enough to finally send me over the edge.

I buried my cry of completion against his shoulder at first, and just as I finally released his penis to give it one last stroke, I captured Naruto's satiated howl within my mouth in another kiss which had my already molten stomach quaking with sweet satisfaction.

(dear God ...what have we done?)

With our combined musk saturating the air, we finally broke apart and sagged against each other in complete and utter weariness; sticky, sweaty and with no energy to even lift a finger to clean up the mess we had created. I was more than content to remain in this position until morning, but reality (oh how annoying that could be) crept in with the knowledge that Haku would probably come looking for me soon. I wasn't sure I was ready to explain just why Naruto and I were half-naked and covered with semen.

"We should take a bath," I mumbled against his chest, when we were finally able to breathe normally again. My heart was still racing, but at least his felt sturdier and more in control. I could listen to this all night long to be honest.

"Mmmhmm..." came the low reply. It sounded like he was already half-asleep.

"We're sticky, Naruto," I argued wearily.

"I don't care."

"It's..." Icky. Disgusting. Unhygienic.

"It's what?" he drawled, forcing me to lift my head to look at him. His gaze was hooded and there was a lazy smirk of satisfaction on his features. I just wasn't prepared to have him lift a cum-coated finger to his lips to lick it off in a motion that had me stirring again.

Damn him.

"I like it," he said with a light shrug and twisted his body to force me off him. We were now lying side-by-side and though he was still lying on his back, I watched him carefully with the big question hanging over my head.

_What now?_

"...did you really like _it_?" I asked quietly, and I wasn't talking about him licking off a part of me I had always considered personal. No one else had tasted and appreciated it in that way before, and I wasn't sure if he would even want to –

"Did you?" he asked while giving me a side-long glance. In his eyes I could see the doubt and yet hope that I would give him the answer he wanted to hear.

"I don't know," I admitted truthfully. "I mean...it was...unlike anything I've ever experienced before."

He chuckled. "Ditto."

"...not even with Ino...it was different -"

"It's always different with a girl. I mean...we've got...they're different," he finished weakly, but I understood what he meant. We might have done _something_ tonight, but it seemed like we could have done so much more to make it more..._complete_. With Ino, it had been the act of actual intercourse- of penetrating into the secret warmth between her legs and becoming one with her. With someone like Naruto, it would mean...

I bit my lower lip and tried to control the sudden thudding of my heart again. If there was a next time, would either of us be willing to give up ourselves that much? I knew I wasn't going to be able to do it, and I doubted Naruto would allow me to go that far, so this would have be enough. I could live with this.

Couldn't I?

"Are you going to tell Haku?" came the low question that jarred me from my thoughts.

"What?"

"Haku." He glanced at me again. "You know he's going to probably suspect something and you might be tempted to tell him about this...us."

"It's none of his business what I choose to do in my private time," I replied with a light shrug. "Besides...we don't have to broadcast this to anyone. Like Itachi and Shisui, we just have to keep it quiet."

"Huh?"

"Huh what?"

"What do you mean by "like Itachi and Shisui"?"

He was looking at me with widened eyes, and I remembered that, technically, I was the only one who knew my brother was in a relationship with the other man. "What do you think I mean?" I asked with a small smile.

"No...fucking way...those two?"

I snickered and moved closer to his warmth, not ashamed to admit that there was something rather comforting about spooning up to another human body after such an intimate act. It was something I had cherished with Ino until she ruined it with that song.

"Yes, those two," I agreed.

"Wow...never would have guessed."

"They hide it pretty well."

He fell silent for a heartbeat of a second before asking quietly...almost shyly. "So this is our secret too, right?"

"Right," I agreed as my lashes grew heavier. I wanted to be clean, but I was so very tired. We had had a very, very, very long day. There was another lengthy pause in which I assumed Naruto had dozed off again, and I too was probably off to dreamland when his voice broke through the cobwebs of sleep.

"Sasuke?"

"Hmm?"

"What would you do if I told you that...?" He hesitated and then stopped altogether. "Nevermind."

"What is it?" I prodded though my mind was already in shut down.

"It's nothing. Let's just get some sleep okay?" came the soft words that seemed to be whispered into my hair. I felt his arms around me, or maybe it was the futon's blanket. Whatever it was, I welcomed, for it made me feel safe, secure..._wanted_.

These were the feelings I had not experienced since the death of my childhood; feelings I now longed to latch onto and protect for the rest of my life.


	28. 28: Potent Fragility

**Notes:** Have I mentioned how much I love you dear readers and gobble up your feedback like the hungry, greedy bitch I am? *lol* Thank you to the umpteenth power for your comments. I'd write more, but it's past one in the morning and I've got to be up for work in less than five hours. Oh joy. So please enjoy, digest, and spit out your comments as always for they are little jewels that I add to the ever growing collection in my heart.

Oh and please don't read with your bosses or teachers or kiddies looking over your shoulder – not that it's that graphic, but better safe than sorry! XD

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><p><strong>Chapter 28:<strong>

**Potent Fragility**

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><p><em>As Mount Arima<br>Sends its rustling winds across  
>Ina's bamboo plains,<br>I will be just as steadfast  
>And never will forget you.<em>

_**Daini no Sanmi, Lady Kataiko**_

* * *

><p>Haku had seen everything – at least enough to know that his master was probably not going to be returning to their apartment tonight.<p>

In silence, he put away the tray of food that had been specially prepared in case his master returned starving and requesting nourishment. He debated on whether or not to roll up the futon he had laid out for Sasuke-sama, and after an inner argument for all but a minute, he quietly put it away in the closet; instinct telling him it might definitely not be needed. He closed the book he had been reading and turned off the lone Japanese lantern, to immerse himself in darkness, before settling beneath his blanket for the night. He willed himself to sleep even going as far as squeezing his eyes shut as if to rid himself of what he had witnessed in the hallway minutes earlier.

Sasuke-sama and Naruto-kun..._kissing?_

He literally had to slap himself a little as the image burned hot and sharp within his troubled mind; finally forcing him to lift his lashes again.

Had he really seen that? Or had that all been a figment of his imagination?

There was really no way Sasuke-sama – THE Sasuke-sama who abhorred anything remotely close to another male's intimate contact except for the few times he had allowed Haku to give him massages – could be engaged in such an act. The Sasuke-sama he knew would never allow another man to touch him in that way. The Sasuke-sama he knew had always looked upon the act of love between men as something disgusting and revolting. He would spend hours preaching to Haku about the sins of the flesh, and how his relationship with Orochimaru's cronies and then Zabuza-san were nothing more than evils set within the human heart. Obediently, Haku had listened to the lectures; never having the willpower to tell his master that not all love between men was to be reviled and found grotesque. Sure what Orochimaru-sama did in his bedroom was not exactly enough to convince Sasuke-sama otherwise, but Haku had wished he could show his master the 'other' side of love; the more powerful, sweet, wonderful, all-encompassing devotion one could feel when in the presence of another man.

He had, naively, assumed that his loyalty to Sasuke-sama; his ability to discern between the love he had for his master as a servant and that of a real lover, would prove to the older man that it could indeed be beautiful.

So what _exactly_ had he seen out there in the hallway?

Sasuke-sama pinned against the wall. Sasuke-sama allowing Naruto-kun (who supposedly was opposed to the whole male relationship issue as well) to take him at will in such a passionate way that even Haku was unable to stop the flood of heat that raced through him at the sight. It was a miracle he hadn't been caught now that he thought about it. But then again, those two had been so into what they were doing, even if Haku had run past them naked, they probably wouldn't have noticed a damn thing.

He moaned and clamped his thighs together; forcing himself to will away the growing strain in his nether regions. It had been so long since he had been involved in any kind of sexual activity, and though he did pleasure himself to relieve some of the 'stress' (and never in the presence of his master as that would be disrespectful), Haku realized that he had not experienced such intimate contact with another human being in almost a year! Seeing his master and Naruto-kun out there had triggered that primal need deep within which in turn, made Zabuza-san's death all the more bitter to swallow.

It wasn't until he felt the salt of tears on his upper lip, did he realize he had been crying silently all this time. Embarrassed and angry at his reaction, he wiped them away quickly; subconsciously imagining Sasuke's authoritative voice in his head. His master would never approve of him being so weak over something so stupid, and yet - deep down inside - Haku felt a sliver of resentment at that. That this same master who would preach to him about the vices of the flesh would turn around and do the exact opposite. And what about Naruto-kun himself? Wasn't it the same Naruto who had shuddered at the mention of Haku's preference with the male species? And now this same Naruto was slobbering all over his master as if he's never been with another human before?

_Hypocrites,_ his mind screamed and he promptly sucked in a harsh breath and covered his face in shame at his angry thought. Oh, if his master could hear him now, he'd be thrown out to the streets. That he would.

He lowered his trembling hands and turned restlessly on the futon to stare blindly at the ceiling. He knew he owed his life to Sasuke-sama, knew that without Sasuke-sama's intervention his life might have turned out differently. So what was this inexplicable ache throbbing within his chest? Why was he going through a gamut of emotions over what he had witnessed? It didn't make much sense to him.

When it had been revealed that Sasuke-sama had been with a woman, Haku couldn't remember even feeling this agitated over it. Even knowing that Karin-chan was gung-ho over his master wasn't enough to stir these intense emotions. Sure he was still worried that someday Karin might take over his job as servant to Sasuke-sama, but with how lukewarm their relationship had become in the past week or so, Haku knew he really had not much to be concerned about. All the same...why? Why now? Why this burning sensation in his heart at the idea of Sasuke-sama and Naruto-kun becoming intimate?

Was it because he was ..._jealous_?

Envious perhaps – yes. But _jealousy_? And at whom? And why? Was he jealous of Sasuke-sama? Was a part of him really actually _in love_ with his master after all? Was that why he was so shocked by what he had witnessed? Had a part of him wished that Sasuke-sama would continue to remain 'hateful' of homosexuality, hence only allowing Haku to be the one male who could touch him and elicit those helpless reactions of arousal? Had a selfish part of him been glad that his master was likely never to court the affections of another male and that he would remain 'safe' in this master-servant relationship until their dying day?

Or was he jealous of Naruto-kun? Haku sucked in a harsh breath as something twisted even harder within his chest. He squeezed his eyes shut and bit his lower lip as the truth struck him like a blow.

Uzumaki Naruto; the charismatic blue-eyed, blond-haired man who had seized his attention from the moment Haku laid eyes on him that cold winter morning. Naruto, who could be venomous with his insults and hate when provoked, yet lovable, kind, and helplessly funny when in the best of moods. The Naruto who could be kind to a fault and would stand up for you when he felt you were downtrodden. The Naruto that Haku was slowly beginning to realize that – deep down – he had wished and hoped that in some way, the blond would find him just as attractive and would want to see him as more than just Sasuke-sama's servant. If his master had been fascinated with Naruto from the beginning, then Haku had been enchanted from the start. He had wanted to become Naruto-kun's friend, and had done all he could to prove it to the blond as best he could. He had secretly relished the platonic hugs or hi-fives or absent-minded kisses Naruto would plant on his forehead or head after a job well done. He had felt his heart flutter a million times whenever that smile was trained on him or those blue eyes flashed with warmth for him. As much as he cherished Sasuke-sama's praises, Haku knew that getting one from Naruto-kun was worth even more. Naruto made him feel _special_ even without knowing it. The blond's ability to make Haku feel like he was the only one in the world worth being around made his heart beat just a little faster whenever they were together. This was why that day in the Laundromat – when Naruto had made it clear that he would never be involved with another male – had hurt deeper than Haku wished to acknowledge.

He knew all his innocent flirtations– and Naruto's responses sometimes – were nothing more than a waste of time. He knew his place now in the blond's world. He would be nothing more than a friend, and Haku had gradually begun to accept his role...until tonight.

From what he had seen, Naruto was obviously not as averse to males as he once presumed. Either he had lied to Haku at the Laundromat or he had finally decided to give it a try – to see what it was like on the 'dark side' as he had so eloquently put it during one of their many conversations.

_So Sasuke-sama has succumbed to the dark side as well,_ he thought with a wry smile. It was so ironic, he could laugh, and yet all he felt like doing was sobbing into the pillow in misery.

He knew he was dealing with two powerful men; men who had for so many months crossed paths and triggered off emotions within each other they had never experienced before. Haku was observant enough to have noticed the signs; from his master's seeming obsession with the sinner back at Byaku-Shinkyou, to the snippy arguments, the side-long glances, the tension that seemed to brew whenever those two were in the same space – let alone room – all finally coming to a head in an explosive 'embrace' that would have made even Orochimaru-sama blush at the sight. Speaking of Orochimaru-sama, Haku wondered what the man would think if this news ever reached him. Haku was more than aware that Orochimaru had his eyes set on taming Sasuke-sama so many times in the past, and each time he had been rebuked or shot down by a very uninterested and unimpressed young man. Wouldn't Orochimaru-sama laugh and pat himself on the back for a job well done if he was to witness those two tonight. He would probably assume that all his years of 'teaching' were finally being put to good use.

And at whose expense?

He eventually fell into listless sleep, where his dreams were plagued with images of his master and Naruto-kun running away and leaving him behind. He awakened with a pounding headache, his eyes puffy, his cheeks caked with dried tears and a feeling of general apathy. He really did not feel like doing a damn thing today, but knew he'd have to get ready for a day in which he'd have to put on his best acting performance yet. He knew his master would never reveal what had probably transpired last night, and Haku knew it was not his place to ask any questions that were of no concern to him. So he would play the ignorant fool for now; pretend as if he had seen nothing and keep serving his master as best he could.

It was going to be hard to pull off, but Haku was resilient if nothing else.

After his morning prayers, he gathered his toiletries and made his way to the bathroom, but not before halting before Naruto's apartment for a brief moment to stare at the solid oak door. Behind it, his master and his (probably) new lover were fast asleep. It was a strange concept to reconcile himself to, but things were changing. They were _all_ changing. Life away from Byaku-Shinkyou had opened them up to new experiences and Haku would have to find a way to be happy that his master had finally found someone he could be close to...at least physically. Besides, wasn't that his role as servant? To feed off his master's happiness and sacrifice his own?

Biting his lower lip, he forced himself away from the apartment and pushed open the door to the bathroom. If he had been focused on his surroundings, he would have noticed the red plastic card they had all agreed would be placed on the door to tell that it was occupied. This had to be done especially for the girls, as it was hard for anyone to hear a knock on the door with the showers going or water running.

It wasn't until the cloud of steam, which had blocked his view at first, slowly began to dissipate, did it finally sink into Haku's mind that the bathroom was occupied. Kicking himself mentally for his stupidity, he began apologizing for not knocking or seeing the red plastic card when the steam cleared long enough for him to make out who the occupant was.

_Naru...Naruto-kun?_

Haku, who had reached for his basket of toiletries, barely felt it slip from boneless fingers to clatter to the floor loudly. It was enough to have the blond finally turning around on the stool, hands still stuck in his lather-coated hair (and running down the sides of his face) to notice he had a visitor with him. For a long, heart thumping minute, both men stared at each other incredulously; Haku aware of how hot he was beginning to feel (and it had nothing at all to do with the temperature in the room) as the memory of how dominating Naruto-kun had been while kissing his master occupied every section of his mind.

_Oh dear! I have to get out of here!_

"Sor...sorry! Sorry!" he stuttered breathlessly; bending down to pick up his things with hands that trembled violently. He felt incredibly clumsy and ridiculously close to tears. In fact – and much to his horror – he _was_ crying, and he mentally kicked himself for being so foolish. After all his inner pep talk about being happy for these two, here he was weeping over dropping his damn shampoo and soap. He really was becoming too weak.

"Haku?"

"It's okay!" he said with as much gaiety as he could muster in his voice...except an uncontrolled sniffle from him ruined everything. "I'll leave you alone to bathe. I apologize. I did not see the card on the door because I was thinking about something else...not that you should be concerned about what I'm thinking about. It's just that I didn't see the card and I wasn't paying much attention and...and..."

Realizing he was rambling and not making much sense, he finally jammed the washcloth into the basket, gave a quick bow and would have bolted out in shame, when he felt the hard tug on his wrist to hold him prisoner.

"What's wrong? Did something happen?" came the gentle, concerned question that broke whatever little resolve he had left.

It wasn't fair. It just wasn't fair. Why couldn't he conjure up some form of anger at Naruto-kun for what happened? Why did that voice of genuine caring have to make him this fragile? Ah, if only he hadn't heard that 'thump' last night while dozing off in his attempt to wait for Sasuke-sama. If only he had remained in the room instead of being curious enough to see what was responsible for the noise. If only he had closed the door immediately after seeing the familiar silhouettes of his master and friend instead of remaining transfixed on watching two beautiful men display their desire for one another...

"Haku? Is everything -?"

"I'm fine, Naruto-kun," he stated in a voice that was considerably stronger than he assumed it would. He took a deep breath and rubbed at his eyes with the sleeve of his kimono, before making himself turn to face the bemused man with a small smile. "I...I guess I'm still a little tired. That's all." He smiled a little wider and playfully poked the blond's forehead. "The soap will get into your eyes soon. You should rinse off."

"Ah, almost forgot all about that," Naruto replied with a weak chuckle; though his eyes proclaimed that he still didn't believe Haku's story about 'tiredness' making him all teary-eyed. "Come join me," he invited as he settled back on the stool and tugged the shower head toward him. "Plenty of room."

"I'll just wait until you're finished," Haku said with what he hoped was nonchalance. "Don't want to bother you -"

"You're not a bother. Geez," came the low grumble as soap suds cascaded down his hair and back; that strong back his master must have probably...

_Stop. Thinking. About. That. Haku!_

Chiding himself and shaking his head a little, Haku took another deep breath and obeyed without a fight. Soon, he was sitting across from Naruto and absently combing his fingers through his long hair. It was now almost waist-length; something Karin was now determined to get him to cut before it dragged on the floor.

From beneath hooded lashes, he watched Naruto, who was now scrubbing down himself...except for an area below his right breast. It looked like a bruise of some sort, and Haku's immediate thought was that they had gotten into another fight; although it still wouldn't explain why his master hadn't returned last night if there was indeed an argument.

_Or maybe they 'made up' afterwards the best way two hot-blooded male could._

"What happened to you there, Naruto-kun?" he finally asked when his curiosity could be contained no longer.

Naruto, who was probably lost in his own thoughts as well, looked up with a blank expression before noticing what Haku was pointing at. He eyed the bruise and allowed a wry smile to come to his visage.

"We got attacked by a bunch of thugs last night," he explained with a shake of his head. "It was the damnedest thing, I tell you."

And just like that, Naruto began to regale Haku with the story of what had transpired after the festival. Haku listened with rapt attention, always finding himself enthralled whenever Naruto began his tales –fact or fiction. In this case, it seemed like fact, and knowing that his master had almost spent a night in jail was too much to comprehend. He would have paid good money to see Sasuke-sama behind bars, not because he wanted something bad to happen to him, but to think that a man, who was the next leader of the Japanese police force, had been locked in a small jail in the backwaters of Korea...Haku couldn't control the giggles even if he wanted to. At the sound, Naruto seemed to relax a little more and didn't hesitate to embellish a few of the things that happened for Haku's entertainment. He really did like listening to that soft laughter.

"Was that bruise on your neck part of the fight too?" Haku asked as he gladly accepted the wash cloth from Naruto to help wash his back. Almost as soon as he asked, he felt the shoulders stiffen a little; a subtle body language that told Haku all he needed to know. Of course it wasn't a part of the fight with the thugs. It was the same mark Sasuke-sama had on his neck a few weeks ago, only this time – it was Naruto-kun's turn to sport one. Just how long had their relationship been going on without the rest of them knowing? How long had they continued to deceive everyone about their 'hate' for each other, when they were probably laughing behind their backs at how gullible they all were?

He watched Naruto's hand reach up to caress the hickey in a way that sent a stab of pain right into his heart. He couldn't see Naruto's face, but if he could, Haku was sure there was probably a small smile there; that his eyes would probably be glazed from the memory of what had transpired last night, and that Haku was no longer in the room with him. Naruto was simply back in his apartment with his master, and Haku was again relegated as nothing more than the token friend. He gripped the wash cloth tightly and resisted the urge to scrub Naruto's skin until it was raw and bleeding. Goodness knows Haku wished he could do the same to himself right about now.

_Bleed all my pain away..._

"Anyway," he said aloud and with that same false sense of gaiety that made him sick to his stomach. "It sounds like you both had a very interesting day. I wish mine was that fun. I did get to work on my throwing -"

"With the knives?" Naruto asked incredulously. He had, thankfully, stopped caressing the hickey and had half-turned to look at Haku with raised brows. "Where do you get to practice?"

"Jae Weong took us to this empty warehouse not too far from here. He says we can practice there for as long as we like. So while Karin tested her shooting skills – and she's so good, Naruto-kun – I worked on my throwing." He flexed his wrist and looked at his hands for a long minute. "I think I'm getting a little soft," he muttered to himself. "I missed several targets, but today, I'm going back to practice even harder. You should come too. Jae Weong says he has a special trainer just for us."

"I should," Naruto agreed with a purse of his lips in thought. "To be honest, I haven't used a gun in ages, and I wouldn't even know how to shoot a target an inch in front of me without messing things up. When do you think you'll be ready?"

"Hmm...after Sasuke-sama's had breakfast...?" Haku asked; knowing he was leaving his statement with a sort of open-ended question. "I haven't seen him since last night, so I'm assuming he..." He paused and then forced himself to finish; though his gaze was lowered to his lap. "He spent the night with you."

There was a tense silence in which the only sounds were the trickle of water from the shower head and their shallow breathing. Naruto eventually cleared his throat and seemed to take a deep breath.

"Uumm...about that..."

"You don't have to tell me anything," Haku insisted with a firm shake of his head. He could tell that Naruto was hesitant about sharing what had transpired, and the last thing Haku wanted to do was make him uncomfortable. "I guess Sasuke-sama was just so tired last night he wanted to spend the night with you. I understand completely."

He gave a shaky laugh and reached for his shampoo, but damn his butter fingers for the bottle slipped out of his grasp and spilled its gooey pink contents to the tiled floor.

"So clumsy today," he laughed weakly. "I don't know what's wrong with me -"

"Are you mad?"

"Wh...what?" Haku looked up with widened eyes at the blunt question; wondering if he had upset Naruto. However, all he could see in those blue eyes were doubt, concern and some other emotion that was hard to discern.

"I mean are you upset that Sasuke didn't come back to your apartment last night?" Naruto asked in that same quiet voice. His gaze never left Haku's now flustered features, and the servant was finding it a little difficult to breathe.

"I'm...I'm not upset," he finally managed to stutter. He clutched the now half-empty bottle of shampoo between his hands. "It's not my place to be upset -"

"Stop thinking of 'your place' and think for yourself, Haku," Naruto cut in with a light frown. "I know you've got this loyalty schtick going when it comes to Sasuke but be honest...does it bother you that he was with me last night?"

"...it's not the first time I've slept without Sasuke-sama," Haku replied quietly. "Why should he not being there be a bother to me?"

"Because you've been acting weird all morning."

"Weird?" Haku gave an uncharacteristic snort of derision. "What do you mean by that, Naruto-kun?"

"I mean you've been acting as if I have the plague. You hardly look me in the eye, and then there was the whole crying thing."

"I was not crying about...about Sasuke-sama not being with me!"

"Then what the fuck's bothering you?"

They were now yelling at each other and not even realizing it, none more so than Haku who felt every fiber in his being thrumming with the embers of the jealousy he had experienced last night.

_I __**saw**__ you first_, his mind screamed. _While Sasuke-sama was busy trying to maintain his neutrality over you, I was the one who saw your true potential and how wonderful a person you really were beneath the surface. If anyone has the right to be upset at how things are going, it should be __**me**__! I wanted you first! It's not fair!_

"Haku..." Naruto warned lowly with a crease of his brows. "If you don't stop glaring at me like that -"

"Then what?" Haku allowed a small smile to come to his features; a smile that seemed oddly dangerous and gave Haku an expression that had Naruto doing a double take. "Would you push me up against the wall like you did to Sasuke-sama and take me as you will?"

The reaction was priceless, and Haku would have burst into laughter if he still wasn't burning up inside. The rush of color to fill the blond's visage, the dropped jaw, the sucked in breath and the barely audible "You...you saw...?" had Haku shaking his head. He rose to his feet slowly to tower over Naruto allowing the blond to see him completely naked.

No pretenses. No barriers. Just _him_.

"I saw," Haku agreed quietly. "Saw enough to fuel my imagination as to what possibly happened in your apartment last night."

Naruto licked his lips and shook his head a little. "Listen...Haku...it's not..."

"You really don't have to explain yourself to me, Naruto-kun," Haku insisted in that same quiet voice. "But I just wanted to make sure of something."

"Wha...what?"

"That day...in the Laundromat...when you seemed appalled that I was interested in relationships with the male sex...was that all a lie?"

Naruto's lashes lowered, but only for a second as Haku reached out to cup his cheeks gently but firmly, forcing his gaze back to the features he still found beautiful for a guy. It didn't help that with that thick long hair all around his slender frame like a wet shroud...God help him, but it was sexy as hell.

Besides he was only human, and last night's escapades with Sasuke had broken open a dam within that was going to be extremely difficult to shut down quickly.

"Well? Naruto-kun? Can you look me in the eye and tell me now that you feel absolutely nothing for men?"

A sound – akin to a moan of suffering escaped Naruto's lips and he shuddered as Haku moved closer still.

"You obviously liked being with Sasuke-sama...so would you be averse to me then?"

"Haku..." Naruto half-pleaded/gasped as the undeniable brush of Haku's erection against his chest had him trembling in response. The ache between his legs was now a tangible thing that needed satiation and fast. It was almost embarrassing to be experiencing this now especially with someone he had tried to tell himself was no more than just an unfortunate man born too beautiful for his own good.

"We should...shouldn't do this..."

"Why?" Haku asked with such genuine innocence that it stumped Naruto for a second. "You are responding to me, Naruto-kun. I can see it in your eyes and feel it in your body. All men react the same way to me."

"Don't lump me with all of your previous boyfriends or whatever," Naruto growled beneath his breath. "I am not like them."

"Of course not," Haku agreed with a warm smile. He allowed his fingers to trace the outline of Naruto's scars as if worshipping each line on his cheek with reverence before sinking his fingers into the roots of his hair. The ensuing groan of approval was more than enough for Haku, though he knew he wanted to see more...more of how Naruto would react if he was to give him a massage as detailed as the one delivered to Sasuke-sama so many times in the past.

"You are special, Naruto-kun," Haku whispered thickly as he leaned in to trail his lips along Naruto's cheek and toward his ear. "And that is why I envy Sasuke-sama so very much."

"What?"

Haku blushed at the incredulous cry and finally stepped away; unaware of how much damage he had caused...or maybe he did from the evidence of Naruto's arousal he was making no attempt to hide. He turned redder still at the sight of how much longer and thicker it looked in this state. To touch it...to taste it would be...

He slapped himself mentally; ashamed that the wanton side of him – no thanks to those endless nights pleasing Orochimaru's friends – had crept to the surface so quickly. This was unlike him to be so daring and bold to someone he considered a friend. Naruto-kun would lose all respect for him, and he would rather die than lose that.

"I apologize," he stuttered and sank back onto his stool. "It's just...nothing. Nothing at all."

He bit his lower lip hard and struggled to hold back his tears again. He fumbled blindly for his shampoo as he spoke in a rush. "I am just happy that you've stopped lying to yourself and that you've found someone else to make you...um...give you satisfaction. Sasuke-sama is a good person. He really is and you should...mmmmppff!"

When later asked to describe it, Haku would liken it to liquid fire baptizing his lips. Unexpected yet oh-so-needed, Naruto's kiss was able to do something within Haku he had never thought possible. He had always assumed that Zabuza-san's kisses were knee-weakening, but this..._this_ was unlike anything he had ever experienced before. Desire flared through his body in a flood that had his head spinning and his heart beating loudly within his chest and ears. His slick hands reached up to try to grasp Naruto's forearms, more to steady himself as he felt the stool slipping from beneath him.

It didn't help much for they both ended up collapsing to the wet floor anyway. It would have been a nasty fall, if Naruto didn't suddenly break the kiss with a gasp while rescuing Haku at the same time.

"You...you all right?" Naruto panted breathlessly.

Haku, who felt he was still probably dreaming this whole sequence up, blushed a million shades of red and could only nod like a fish. Speaking was no longer an option. His lips, mouth and tongue still tingled from the delicious assault even as Naruto helped him sit up again.

"Damn it," came the muttered curse from the blond. He closed his eyes and leaned against the wall, and not opening them, continued quietly. "I am one sick bastard. Between you and your master -"

Haku smiled; his heart still racing but now with a lightness that words could not describe. Naruto-kun had _kissed_ him and that was all that mattered! The rest of the day was going to be wonderful. He just knew it! Even if nothing else came out of this relationship, just knowing that he had managed to get such a fiery gift from the older man was enough. He grinned and snuggled against the stiff body beside him with an arm wrapping around the slender waist.

"Hey now..." Naruto began weakly. "Don't get too cozy. Just because I did that doesn't mean that we're going to be hitting the sack soon."

"Hitting the sack? What sack?" Haku asked innocently. He looked up at Naruto causing the blond to cover his eyes with an arm and with a louder groan as if in pain.

"Damn it, Haku! You're doing that on purpose!"

"What? What am I doing?"

"Stop looking so goddamn cute. Now get off me."

"But I don't want to. I want to remain like this forever."

"Our butts will start hurting in this position," Naruto protested. "And besides...I've got to take care of something anyway."

"What is it?"

Naruto lowered his arm to nod at what was so glaringly obvious between them. Haku felt the rush of heat to his features and licked his lips in hungry anticipation.

"Would...can I, Naruto-kun?"

Naruto raised a brow. "Can you what?"

"Take care of it for you?" Haku whispered shyly as he lowered his lashes. He squashed the brief but bitter memories of how many old, fat, greasy men he had said the same words to while they lounged on satin sheets and gloated with evil satisfaction as he sucked them to completion. He could still remember how horrible their semen had tasted as it coated his tongue and went down his throat; seemingly buckets and buckets of the damn sticky fluid drenched into him as if he was a drain of some sort. He would be forced to swallow it all before them, some even going as far as inspecting his mouth to make sure there was nothing left. How many times had he run off in shame, throwing up in the privacy of his bathroom as if hoping to rid himself of their defiling taste? For days afterwards he couldn't even get himself to eat solid food for the taste of their cum would interfere and make everything edible revolting to his palette.

_I am no longer in that place,_ he told himself as he slid lower down the lithe body before him as if in worship. _I am no longer that Haku who was a toy._ _I am wanted and needed by someone who cares for me in his own way._

His fingers wrapped around the hard length and he smiled as it responded even more to his touch. Naruto was saying something, but Haku couldn't hear a damn thing. All he wanted..._needed_ was this beautiful man before him. He was going to take Naruto-kun to heights he had only dreamed about, and it would all start with a simple, slow, lingering lick of his throbbing manhood and a tender kiss on its swollen cum-slicked head.

_Welcome, my dearest Naruto-kun,_ he moaned as he parted his lips to accept a most precious gift. _Welcome to the pleasures of the flesh like you've never experienced before._

* * *

><p><em>Naruto:<em>

Hell has a special place for me, and I'm guessing it's right between Satan's bedroom and his toilet. Why? I'll tell you why. Today has been the weirdest (and happiest) day of my life, and I've got two _**guys**_ to thank for it.

Imagine that.

Even Shikamaru seems to have noticed my good mood, not that he should be talking considering he's been banging Temari for a week straight with no breaks (I'm sure). It's a damn miracle he's out here with us at the abandoned warehouse for training as I had assumed he'd be 'too busy' to hang out with us. Like Haku, he too had asked about the hickey on my neck, but I was glad to have the back up story about the thugs because telling Shika some lie about being bitten by a weird bug was not going to cut it. At least he had sympathized with my plight and wished he had come with me, though I was more than secretly glad he hadn't.

_Wonder what you'll think of me if I told you just how much fun last night and this morning really was, Shikamaru. You'd think I've lost my mind, or maybe no longer be buddies with me, but I swear...being with a guy isn't as bad as it seems. At least if you are with guys who are decent human beings._

"She's good," he muttered as we watched Karin fire off a few rounds at set targets several feet away from her. The sound was deafening, but Jae Weong had been nice enough to give us headphones to protect us from going deaf.

As for the warehouse itself, it was a huge relic from back in the day, a survivor from a terrible fire that had destroyed most of the other buildings in the vicinity. It apparently once belonged to a fishing business, but all that remained now were rusty steel frames, peeling and weathered brick walls with unreadable Korean script to signify the building's former glory. Shame really, but damn perfect for us all around.

"Uh huh," I muttered absently to Shika's observation for my attention was distracted (again) as my gaze drifted to Sasuke and Haku. Both were inspecting Haku's throwing knives and talking about techniques on throwing the deadly weapons, but all I could see – all my sick, twisted, perverted mind could _see_ – were those set of hands doing so many other things to this body of mine I had once almost considered useless and tainted beyond repair.

These two men had managed to do things I had only assumed I could achieve in the comfort and arms of a woman, and what made it even more alarming was that I had enjoyed every sick, twisted, and _amazing_ moment of it.

It was Sasuke with his expertise in jerking me off harder and better than I had ever done before. It was the way he caressed my bruised flesh with a gentleness that had surprised me as I had no clue the guy had it in him. It was Haku using both his hands and mouth (and damn! What a goddamn mouth on that kid) to send me nearly screaming with an orgasm that would have killed a guy with a weaker heart. I still couldn't explain to you how I had deserved to get such special treatment, considering the only reason I kissed him was to stop him from crying. I know, I know, stupid way to do so, but I couldn't help it! Seeing Haku in tears makes me feel so damn funny inside. Like my heart was literally breaking in two. I hated to see him look and sound so damn depressed, and I knew it was all my fault in some way. The guy _cared_ about me – more than I deserved – and I wanted to make him happy in some little way, even if it meant stealing a kiss from those sweet lips (and they really had tasted as sweet as they looked). But man, talk about getting the mother of all blow jobs. I think my heart is still racing from the whole thing, and he's not helping matters by smiling at me (in that way) whenever our eyes meet.

_Sneaky bastard!_

That secretive shy smile would have me blushing in embarrassment, and then it would be Sasuke's turn to give me 'a look' (only his was far from shy) and my insides would go nuts too. This was too much! The first time I allow two dudes to touch me, and I forget how to act like myself. Where the hell had Mr. Tough Guy run off too? Who was this impersonator in his place and how could I get rid of him?

_Goddamn it!_

"Oy! Focus, man," Shika snapped as he nudged me harder. "It's your turn."

"You ready?" came the curt question from the burly man who must have been at least ten feet tall. With silver hair in a severe crew cut and a penchant for wearing army fatigues and combat boots, our trainer was none other than another 'good friend' of Jae Weong's, Sergei Mutko.

An ex-lieutenant colonel of the Russian army, Sergei now worked underground as a military specialist (read as hired assassin) to anyone willing to pay for his services. It was beginning to make me wonder just what kind of circles that old fogey – Jae Weong (who was currently sleeping in the van outside) – ran in. But then again, if Itachi could trust him, I guess we'd have to.

"You hold the gun like it's a limp noodle, Naroot!" Sergei retorted in sharp Japanese. The man was fluent in the language as well as Korean, English, his native Russian, French, Chinese and Spanish. It helped that he had to travel around the world a lot when he was still in the military, but it still didn't explain why he found it so damn hard to say my name right. What the hell does 'Naroot' mean? There's a goddamn 'o' at the end of my name damnit!

"The gun is not a rose to hold so limply. You grip it. With a strong wrist. Like a man!"

He proceeded to show me just how 'manly' I had to hold the damn thing, by seizing the Glock from my unresisting grip, pulling back the hammer, cocking it and then sending a blast right into the head of the shadowed man target about fifty feet away – all in mere seconds.

_Holy shit._

"_That_ is how you shoot, Naroot," he clipped and slapped the still warm weapon onto my palm. "They told me you were a natural -"

"I'm not so sure about that..." I mumbled in protest.

"So prove it to me!" Sergei interrupted and shoved me toward the large white X drawn on the ground. I held the weapon between hands that trembled a little, aware now of just how real this was all becoming. In the hands of Sergei, the Glock had looked small and insignificant, now it felt like it weighed a fucking ton. It was one thing to pretend that I knew what to do with it, since I had taken it with me last night in the hopes that I _wouldn't_ get to use it, but now...in this place...with everyone watching and judging me, could I really prove myself as a legitimate gunslinger?

I looked back at my eccentric 'family' – weird to even consider them as such – but after living with them for what seemed like an eternity, they had come to mean that much to me. Shika and his 'wife' were both smiling and encouraging me with nods. Karin with her fingers crossed and a smile on her face. Haku all but biting his nails nervously while mouthing 'good luck' and Sasuke..._heh._ As if I expected anything different. He was not smiling or giving me any real look of encouragement – except I could still _somehow_ tell what he was thinking anyway.

_Don't fuck it up._

_Yes, sir. _

I smirked and turned back to my target, idly wondering if both men (Haku and Sasuke) knew what the other was up to. There was something rather tantalizingly dangerous about harboring such secrets and being kept in the middle of it. Only problem was, Haku already knew Sasuke and I had done 'something' together, but getting to tell Sasuke that his servant had gone down on me in the bathroom...I had a nasty feeling someone wasn't going to take that news too well.

_To tell Sasuke or not to tell, now that is the question._

(I pulled the hammer and lifted the gun chest high with arms outstretched and an eye closed to focus on the target that now seemed a million miles away. Did he really have to put it that far? Christ!)

Waking up first, I had spent a good ten minutes or so watching Sasuke sleep. He looked so much younger in that state; almost like a kid who had never seen the horrors of death or been responsible for so many others.

(I stuck my tongue out at the corner of my mouth and steadied my breathing.)

I had wanted to kiss those lips again; to ravish them as I had the night before and to savor their sweet and salty tang until I drowned in it. But I controlled myself long enough to clean him up – since he was still sticky with cum – and had fully expected him to wake up during the 'bath'. Fortunately, he didn't. Poor guy must have been more exhausted than he thought. Either way, it wouldn't do for anyone to walk into the apartment and wonder what the weird white stuff on his body was, so I made him as decent as possible. I left the apartment feeling mighty good about how the day was going to go. It was going to be a little strange having to look each other in the face after such an intimate night together, but damn...who knew I was going to get an even better gift in the bathroom in the form of a BJ even Shika wished he could get?

_And from a guy too. Imagine that, dear friends and neighbors._

My finger curled around the trigger, and just like that, everything went still. I could see _everything_.

It was no longer a silhouette of a man before me, but the gradual morphing of the shadow into that all too familiar visage; his gold tooth glinting in the midmorning sun as his lips parted into a mischievous smile.

_Well hello there, Masataka, or should I say, **Ikegami** Kojima, you sick fuck. Looks like I'm going to have to kill you all over again._

I couldn't recall pulling the trigger, but I do remember the recoil of the weapon nearly taking my damn arms off as the bullet took off and never looked back. But wouldn't you know it? Kojima was still leering, still mocking, still thinking I was that naïve little prick he had messed up. Well then...how about eating this?

I used up the rest of the bullets in a continuous round of shooting until there was nothing left but the dry click of the empty cartridge filling my ears, when I was through.

Someone whistled – or at least it sounded like a whistle – but the headphones were making it a little difficult to hear. I watched Haku dash toward the target to bring it back to us, and even I had to be impressed by the result.

I had taken the damn thing's head off. _Not bad at all, Uzumaki Naroot. Not bad at all._

I looked at Sergei. He looked back with a cold smirk; a smirk that clearly said I was a new weapon he would be glad to mold in his image. I grinned back and gave him a mock salute. Bring it on, big guy. I more than welcomed the challenge.

Or maybe I thought too soon.

The son-of-a-bitch wasn't human!

My aching hands were currently soaking in a bowl of ice and some kind of mint concoction Karin had come up with, which was actually quite soothing to my raw and reddened flesh. Sergei was a slave master, for not only had he set out to make me a better gunslinger, I was to work on improving my arm strength...which involved doing over a hundred push ups (under the hot sun on asphalt that just about burnt off my skin) while he taunted me with his one-fingered push-ups.

/Look at me, Naroot! Doing one fingered pushups without even breaking a sweat. And what are you doing? Panting and whining like a baby and you've not even gotten to twenty yet. Come on, Naroot! Take it like a man! Sweat! Struggle! That's the spirit! You are no longer a boy now! You are a man! /

_Like hell, you steroid-infused psychopath._

Tomorrow, we would begin a drill that included learning how to shoot from long range and improving my marksmanship. In other words, I was going to learn how to become a sniper like my father. Assassins had to learn how to shoot from up to a distance of three miles! Seems impossible, but Sergei had claimed he had a friend in the army, who could take out anyone from at least five miles away. Either that guy had the greatest vision in the world or he was super human. Either way, I had to admit that I was reluctantly excited to become familiar with the sniper rifle and other types of guns in his collection. If I was going to set myself as Danzo's confidante, I'd have to prove to him that I had the same skills my father had possessed if not better. He would no doubt what to see what I was capable of, and my aim was to worm my way into his heart until he'd have no choice but to trust me completely.

"Looks like you've made up your mind," came the quiet question that jarred me from my thoughts.

Sasuke was in my apartment again – not that I'm complaining – but unlike last night when we had christened the floor with our shenanigans, tonight we were more subdued (read as exhausted) after Sergei's punishment/training. Turns out Sergei also knew his way around the swords too, and had trained lightly with Sasuke for at least an hour. Watching those two brought back memories – both good and bad. Good for the times I spent with Asuma in that hot basement struggling to survive and bad at having to use my skills to inflict pain on others - especially the battle with Sasuke - beneath that damned steel dome cage. I had almost forgotten how good the guy was with the _katana_, for despite his bum leg, he was still able to move gracefully –

(a beautiful dance of death)

...around the warehouse. Sergei might have been bigger and more aggressive, but Sasuke was able to display years of training with skills that looked effortless. I envied his ability to move that fluidly while I was sure I would clunk around like a robot just like the first time we met in the dojo at Byaku-Shinkyou. He 'killed' Sergei a bunch of times during their practice, so much so, the big guy was a little put off and had to reluctantly give Sasuke his props for being such a skilled sword fighter. Pity it was all catching up to him now. There was a large ice pack on his thigh to ease the swelling.

"Made up my mind about what?" I asked. I wished I could move closer to him, but I was instructed to keep my hands in the ice for at least ten more minutes.

He flipped the next page of the book he was reading - some boring paperback about Korean dynasties or whatever - and repeated himself quietly. "Going to Danzo."

"Ah..." I paused and lowered my lashes. Funny how this guy could read me so easily these days. "Yeah...I was going to ask you that last night."

He blinked in surprise. "When?"

"You know..." I could feel my cheeks burning. "When we were done with...after that...I was going to ask you what you'd think about me leaving for Japan."

He looked put out for a moment before nodding as if finally understanding what I was talking about. "So that's what you were going to ask..." he mumbled.

Now it was my turn to look befuddled. "What did you think I was going to say?"

He shrugged lightly. "Nothing. So, you want my opinion on what I think about it?"

"Not really," I admitted bluntly. "You're probably going to try to talk me out of it, right?"

"...no."

I had been bracing myself for an argument, but at his quiet response, I had to do a double-take. I blinked hard. "Huh?"

He lowered the book to pin me with that all too familiar intense dark stare. "I said I wouldn't stop you. I know your reasons and if I were in your shoes, I'd do the same thing."

I whistled softly. "Wonders shall never cease. The great Uchiha Sasuke-sama agrees with me. This must be a dream."

"Shut the fuck up."

Still, I could see the smile he was trying to hide, although a part of me was a little bit...what? Hurt? That he wouldn't try to talk me out of it? Did he really want me to go or was he just trying to support me in a roundabout way?

"Yeah well...Jiraiya said he'll check back in about a week to see how I'm doing and when I'll be ready. Hopefully Sergei would have made me more "manly" by then."

We both snickered at the term, since that seemed to be the Russian's theme all day; trying to make us all _men_. It really was hard to impress the guy, even after seeing our individual skills. Hell even Temari – who had wowed us with her dexterity with the_ katana_ – hadn't gotten a nod of approval from Mr. Manly. Shikamaru – who was no slouch either – had received a stern warning from Sergei, who insisted that Shika train harder with him during their next lesson. He had failed to see Shikamaru give him the finger behind his back.

"Did you see his face when he realized Haku wasn't a girl?" I asked while cracking up at the mental image of Sergei's paled features during Haku's indignant response at being considered a weak woman.

Sasuke chuckled at the memory. "Or how floored he was when he saw just how good Haku was with the knives?"

"Oooh, priceless moment!"

And was it ever. Sergei was still bad-mouthing Haku at that point and pretty much belittling his appearance, and having had enough of it, Haku all but pinned the guy to one of the steel frames of the building with about five knives. We are talking enough pinpoint accuracy to miss the guy's vital organs and simply target his clothing – though one of the knives did manage to scratch the guy's cheek before embedding itself into the steel frame right next to his ear. _Damn._ Remind me never to piss that guy off.

As if that wasn't impressive enough, Haku had thrown those babies pretty fast too. So fast, you could hardly see them leave his hands! Something about watching him crouched like that and doing his thing, with that intense dark look on his face, made the events in the bathroom all the more...

(fucking hot)

"Naruto?"

"Hmm?"

"You sighed..."

"Huh?"

Sasuke eyed me warily. "You...gave a sigh...like you were thinking of something..."

_Yikes! Think fast. Think fast. Think fast, Naruto!_

"Uum...well...I was just thinking about...you know...last night..."

"How did talking about Haku's skills turn into what happened between us last night?" And yet he was blushing as well as he muttered this. Did I forget to mention just how 'innocent' a flustered Sasuke looks? Burning fingers be damned. I was getting more than a little flustered myself. All this thinking of blow jobs and potential hand jobs was making me hard as a rock.

"What are you doing?" he asked incredulously as I left my position – wet hands and all – to crawl to where he was. I grinned at the flood of color to rush his face and though he tried to prevent me from doing so with his book, I pushed it aside to claim what I wanted anyway.

(mmm...still every bit as delicious as I remembered it. God, I almost feel like eating this guy. Scary.)

"Your hands are cold, you idiot," he muttered against my lips when we finally broke apart for air.

"So...warm them up for me?" I whispered back with a smirk; my hand roaming restlessly beneath his tee shirt to caress those abs that clenched in response before finding his nipple to pinch and tease it gently. His response was to yank me back to his lips again, only he was the one taking charge with the kiss this time. I was most _definitely_ not complaining. We tumbled back to the floor, and someone (me probably) kicked aside his ice pack so it wouldn't be in the way. We were aching all over – thanks to Sergei – but a whole new other ache triggered by what we had started last night – was just going to have to take precedence for now.

"How much time do we have before Haku and Karin return?" I panted breathlessly against his lips as he tugged the zipper of my pants impatiently. I was working on his by the way.

He stopped long enough to glance at the alarm clock before looking back at me with a shrug. "Half-an-hour?" he deduced and smirked as he elicited the correct response from me with the firm squeeze of a very happy-to-see-him part of me.

"Perfect," I gasped in welcome resignation. "Absolutely perfect."

Thinking coherently – for the next half an hour – would be strictly optional.

* * *

><p><em>Haku:<em>

As much as Haku enjoyed his outings with Karin, he had to admit that she really could be the most indecisive and wearisome shopper in the world.

The last three times they had gone to the supermarket, she would spend at least five minutes _per item_, struggling to find which one would work best but at a cost they could still afford. It wasn't as if they were short on cash – as Itachi-sama sent them regularly – so Haku really couldn't understand why she was so damn picky. If he was any less of a gentleman, he might have told her to hurry it up already.

"Karin-chan," he began, hoping he didn't sound like he was whining. "Karin-chaaan."

"What is it?" she snapped impatiently as she eyed two perfectly identical cans of miso-soup flavoring.

"I'm going to wait outside for you, is that okay? There's a nearby park across the street, and you can come get me there when you're done."

She nodded absently and put the cans down...only to pick up the next two flavorings to examine them with microscopic intensity. Haku was officially done. He excused himself and stepped out of the relatively busy supermarket, made sure he watched the street carefully for passing traffic, and jogged lightly when the coast was clear to the welcoming peace and tranquility of the small public park. It seemed an oddity in the middle of a busy section of the city, but they had managed to create a little nook of heaven away from the craziness of reality just a step away. In here, amongst a clutter of trees, well-kept lawns, a beautiful man-made pond with a glorious fountain in the middle, and rows upon rows of breathtaking flowers; it was a paradise amongst towering steels and concrete.

Haku sighed in pleasure and sat on a wrought iron bench to admire the ducks wading in the pond as well as the children trying to feed them some snacks. Sunlight was quickly fading, and it wasn't unusual to see couples finding the time to seek their romantic moments in this place. Haku smiled wistfully as a teenage boy and girl stole shy kisses and whispers on a bench a few feet away from him; completely oblivious to the world. Haku lowered his lashes and tried to imagine he and Naruto-kun in such a position, but knew that not only was that dream never going to come to fruition, society itself might find their activity strange. He was yet to see two men display their affection for one another so publicly. In fact, there were moments when he was sure that such practices were an anomaly for he had _never_ seen any such behavior since he left the confines of Byaku-Shinkyou.

_They will not be as accepting,_ a small voice within him argued. He would later realize this voice sounded eerily like Kimimaro-sama's. _This is not Byaku-Shinkyou were men are not afraid to tell you how they feel in public. In the real world...things are not so easy._

How sad.

Well at least he could be happy knowing that Naruto-kun didn't despise him after what happened earlier today. Haku felt his cheeks flood with color and he had to slap them literally to control the giddy rush that seared through him at the memory of their encounter. How bold and daring had he been then? It was so unlike him, and yet he had _loved_ that devilish side of him. It felt good to be bad and naughty every once in a while. Still...was he able and willing to do something like that again?

_Sigh._ How he wished.

Watching, feeling, and tasting Naruto-kun was still a high he had ridden all day. Like walking on a cloud, Haku had done his chores with a song on his lips (much to Sasuke's bemusement), and had even tolerated that Russian buffoon for the most part until he finally pushed the wrong buttons.

Nobody called him a gutless coward and got away with it.

Still, Haku knew that right now his master was probably with Naruto-kun..._again_. And would be with him so many more times in the future (unless they had a major falling out). Though he had resigned himself to their encounter being a one-time thing as Naruto had more than insisted that it would never happen again, Haku held onto the hope that it _would_ happen _again_. He wasn't sure how yet, but he was going to work on tearing down Naruto-kun's defenses and catching him at his most vulnerable. He could still and would never forget just how beautiful Naruto _sounded_ when he was in the throes of passion. Those breathless moans, helpless whimpers and soft sobs told Haku all he wanted to know about just how sensitive the blond's body was.

_He probably won't last as long as Sasuke-sama during a massage,_ he thought with a giggle.

So lost was he in his thoughts, that he failed to notice he was being studied by the silent newcomer across him.

It was only when the little boy's voice filtered through his thoughts, did Haku finally allow himself to be drawn back to the present. He watched as the boy, of about five or six, picked up his ball and said something in Korean to the man sitting on the bench. Haku's ability to grasp the language was getting better and better, and he was able to discern that the boy was apologizing for dropping his ball into the man's lap. The man in question did nothing but smile and pat the kid's head gently before looking up to catch Haku's gaze.

_Shi...Shin-chan!_

No...wait...that was _impossible_. The Shin he had known was probably still in Japan or dead. He hadn't seen that boy in years! Still the shock at seeing that pale face was so much Haku was unaware of the start and breathless gasp he had given. It took him a second longer to realize that the man was smiling at him, and Haku forced himself to respond, though his heart was still thumping a little harder in his chest.

_He does look like him...at least his profile,_ Haku thought wildly. _Maybe I should just go up and ask him. Couldn't hurt, could it?_

Wouldn't it be something if it turned out to be that very same Shin? The boy had been recruited as a potential officer when Sasuke-sama was about fourteen or fifteen. Back then, Haku had still been under Orochimaru and Kimimaro-sama's employ, so he had seen the pale-skinned quiet boy a few times during lessons at the dojo. Shin had always kept to himself, though he was quite proficient with the knives and _katana_. Back then, he had even been a sparring partner for Sasuke-sama a few times, and many assumed that he'd become a captain of a squad someday with his devotion and attention to lessons and his duties.

However, just as quickly as he had appeared at Byaku-Shinkyou, he was gone.

No one knew what had happened to the quiet kid with the near translucent skin, and though Haku had shyly asked Kimimaro about his whereabouts, all the older man had said was that Shin was no longer fit for the watchdogs. End of story.

It was hard to think that Shin might have been killed; though Haku wouldn't have put it past Orochimaru-sama to do something that terrible to such a young kid who couldn't live up his potential. All the same, there was one other thing about Shin that Haku had liked. The boy had a natural talent in fine arts. He had once caught Shin drawing something during a break in lessons, and had shyly gone up to him to ask what he was doing. Shin had seemed surprised that anyone – aside from the instructors – was even speaking to him, but he had seemed pleased at seeing Haku and had gladly shown him the pictures he had been drawing in his little note book. There were wonderful still life drawings of fruits and people or buildings, and Haku had genuinely praised the boy, glad to see that his words seemed to make Shin happy.

If Shin was still alive, would he still be drawing things? Was he now famous? Or had he become a recluse?

"Uum...ex...excuse me," he began in halting Korean; struggling to remember the basic phrases Sasuke-sama had taught him. Now that he was closer to the stranger, that overwhelming feeling of déjà vu was even stronger than ever.

_He really does look like Shin if he was older,_ Haku thought. _What if it's his brother? Wouldn't that be something?_

"I'm sorry," he stuttered. "I can't speak Korean very well."

"Me neither," the man said in fluent Japanese to a very stunned Haku. He smiled and scratched the bridge of his nose as if embarrassed. "I hope I'm not being too forward, but I noticed you speaking the language while you were in the store with your sister."

Though a part of him stiffened at the notion that this man had been observing him for quite some time, Haku was still too floored at finally meeting someone else who could speak his language. What a relief.

"No, no, you're not being too forward," he said with a light laugh. "It's just that...I didn't want you to think that I was staring at you rudely. I just couldn't help noticing that you looked so very much like someone I knew a long time ago."

"Oh?" The man looked down at himself. He was dressed in a black ensemble; something akin to what Japanese middle-school students wore, and his short, cropped black hair didn't make him look any older. "Who is this doppelganger I remind you of?"

Haku blushed at the look in those dark eyes; they seemed intrigued and yet cold. It was hard to explain. "Oh, he was a former classmate of sorts, but as I said, it was a very long time ago."

"I see...what was this friend's name? Oh, and silly me." The stranger stood up and politely motioned for Haku to sit. Haku felt his cheeks burning hotter still, realizing that this man – like so many others – assumed he was female hence the extra show of respect. He opened his mouth to correct the man, but decided not to. Let this stranger think whatever he wants. He already assumes Karin is his sister, so what the hell?

He sat with a warm smile and bow of politeness. "Thank you."

"The pleasure is all mine," the stranger replied as he sat back down again. "So, you were going to tell me about this friend of yours?"

"Oh...right..." Haku, skipping over most of the details, simply told of Shin and his skills as a fighter and artist. He never mentioned Byaku-Shinkyou, but merely mentioned that they were both students at a famous dojo.

"It's one of the things I'll miss about him," he confessed quietly as his gaze lowered to his hands. "He was such a good artist, and sometimes I got the feeling he'd rather do that instead of spend his time fighting."

"What makes you say that?" came the quiet question that somehow sounded raw and pained – if Haku had been paying much attention to that side of things.

"Oh, I don't know," Haku replied with a light laugh of uneasiness. "It's just a gut instinct, I guess. We used to talk a few times and he always seemed much happier whenever we talked about his art. Everything else, he was vague or disinterested."

"I see...and...what happened to this friend of yours?"

Haku shrugged sadly. "I have no idea. One day he was there, and the next...gone. Without a trace. I asked about him, but no one could give me a straight answer. It would be sad to think that he's dead. He had so much potential, you know?"

"What would you say to him if he was to come back to you today?"

Haku looked floored at the question and spared the stranger a glance. He wasn't sure of what he expected to see on that face, but it revealed nothing except plain interest. "I...I'm not sure," Haku replied carefully. This guy still exuded a cold warmth. "Maybe I'd ask him where he went and what happened to him and if he still spent his time drawing. A part of me thinks and hopes he became famous, but...who knows? Life is ever changing, isn't it?"

"Indeed it is, Haku."

"Chung-hee! Chung-hee! Where are you damn it?"

"Ooops!" Haku stood up with a start and a look of guilt at the sound of his adopted Korean name. Though hard to get used to at first, it was surprising how quickly one could adjust to being called something differently in a few weeks. "I have to run now. So sorry for talking your ear off. I sincerely apologize."

"There's nothing to apologize for," the stranger replied with that same smile that felt neither warm nor faked. "It was a pleasure getting to speak to you."

Haku bowed quickly and prepared to leave when he was stopped again.

"I would like to see you again, Haku. Will you be back here again tomorrow?"

Haku looked shocked at the blatant invitation. Who was this guy? "I'm not sure," he confessed with a light shrug. He could now see Karin making her way toward him, and she wasn't looking too happy. "I am quite busy." Which wasn't a complete lie. They did have training with the buffoon again, only this time, Haku hoped he wouldn't have to kill Sergei if he was insulted again.

"I understand," the stranger said with a soft nod. "But just in case you do return here, I'd love to speak to you again."

"Ah...okay...I'll -"

"Chung-hee! What the hell are you doing? Come on let's go already!"

He spun around and pretended to cover his head from any incoming attacks. "Sorry, Karin-chan. I was just talking to that nice man over there and lost track of time."

"What man?"

"The man over..." Haku turned to point to the bench, but to his chagrin, there was absolutely _no one_ there. In fact, if it wasn't for the boy who was still playing with the ball several feet away, it would seem as if no one had been in that place in ages. Haku shivered as a slight chill ran down his spine.

Had the whole conversation been nothing more than a figment of his overactive imagination?

"Haku?" Karin asked warily. "What man are you talking about?"

"No...nothing," he replied faintly as if in a daze. "I thought there was someone there, that's all."

Karin looked over his shoulder again and shrugged. "Sure...whatever. Urgh. Knew I should have picked up some more pickles at the other store." And as she began to complain about her grocery list, Haku followed behind with more measured and troubled steps while musing over what had taken place just minutes before. He _couldn't_ have imagined things. If he was to ask that kid with the ball, he was sure the boy would also recall seeing the strange pale man in the black suit. Haku couldn't have been talking to himself for almost twenty minutes without anyone thinking he was insane, which meant the man had _indeed_ been there. Perhaps he just left really quickly at the sight of Karin.

It was only then that it hit him like a slap to the face. He came to a sudden stop with his jaw dropping slightly and his heartbeat thumping just a little harder.

The stranger had called him by his Japanese name. Not once, but _twice_.

/Indeed it is, Haku. /

/I would like to see you again, Haku. /

Haku couldn't remember telling the man his _real_ name, and he was sure Karin was always careful to use his Korean name in public. So _how_? How had this man known who he was?

_Shin-chan...was that really you after all? Have you returned from the grave to haunt those you left behind?_

The chill was much stronger now and Haku could literally feel his teeth chattering in response. There was something suddenly uneasy in the air, and he simply couldn't wait to get back home.


	29. 29: Little White Lies

**Notes:** It's been a very trying week for me, dear Readers. My grandfather – who I've been living with for the past year or so – passed away a few days ago, and needless to say I've been an emotional wreck since then. It is hard to watch the person you love and admire wither away slowly each day, and even when the inevitable happens, it is still difficult to comprehend and swallow. Rest in peace, Grandpa. I will miss you so very much.

My sincere thanks to everyone who took the time to leave a comment on the story/last chapter so far. Reading your feedback has been one of the brighter spots of the past few weeks for me, so I thank you from the bottom of my heart. I hope you enjoy the update.

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><p><strong>Chapter 29:<strong>

**Little White Lies**

_For some men I grieve;  
>Some men are hateful to me;<br>And this wretched world  
>To me, with all my sadness,<br>Is a place of misery._

_**-Emperor Gotoba**_

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke:<em>

In just three days, we were back to being strangers. Odd it seemed, considering just how intimate we had become, but thanks to the newcomer in our lives, getting to even _see_ Naruto for more than five minutes had become a luxury in itself.

"…can't get over just how well the blueprints turned out. This is going to be more beneficial than you can imagine. We'll have to send these to Suigetsu and Kiba as soon as we can manage it," Itachi droned on in the background as I lay my aching head on the table and struggled not to groan.

I was in the underground 'communications' room – alone – as everyone else (sans Naruto) had already been given a general briefing of how things were going back home. So far it seemed like Orochimaru had made no overt moves and continued to reside 'quietly' in Byaku-Shinkyou, while Akatsuki had begun to plant the seeds of doubt and discord within the DIET regarding Danzo and his past. The goal was to eventually tie in his relationships with the _yakuza_ and Orochimaru and expose this to the general public. Unfortunately, with Danzo's 'pristine' reputation so deep-seeded within the government and people's psyche, Itachi and his team knew it would take more than a few disgruntled voices within the parliament to uproot the bastard from his position of power.

"It's slow going," Itachi admitted with a hint of frustration in his voice. "And we have to be extra careful now since public opinion is against us. So there can be no outright show of force from our end. Secondly, Danzo knows Councilman Onoki has been his loudest critic, which means we now have the double-duty of protecting the old man – and those who support him - at all times. Who knows when Danzo will strike and have any of them assassinated?"

_Only a matter of time, _I had thought warily. If I had learned anything about the way those two men worked (and I include Orochimaru in this), they were nothing if not resourceful when it came to eliminating obstacles in their way.

"…need Naruto more than we thought," Itachi was saying, which jarred me back to the present. "I take it Jiraiya will be arriving in a few days?"

"…yes," I replied reluctantly; suddenly feeling my heart jackhammer within my chest. My gaze drifted to the clock where with every movement of the second hand, it felt like a death knell; a now painful reminder that with Jiraiya's arrival would mean Naruto's inevitable departure.

It's one of the reasons we've hardly seen Naruto lately. Time was of the essence with his training, and Sergei had just about decided to focus squarely on him until Naruto could pass for a professional assassin. How do you cram in years of instructions and skills in less than a week? Simple. Monopolize your student's every waking moment. Naruto was now prone to be out of his apartment no later than five in the morning, and we'd hear him stumble back in way past midnight in complete exhaustion. They no longer trained with us at the warehouse as Sergei felt it was best to take Naruto to a place where there would be no distractions. Being a marksman required intense concentration after all.

"And how is your training going?" Itachi queried.

"As well as can be expected," I replied as I absently rubbed my right thigh. The bandages were no longer needed and all that was left of my wound was a puckered dark scar that Dr. Woo had assured me would fade in time. Jiraiya had kept his word and delivered a new set of crutches for me (they were lightweight and considerably better than the previous one I had) but, I did my best not to use them too often. If Naruto was determined to become a trained killer by the end of the week, then I would walk on my own two feet by then as well.

"Jae Weong is actually quite the teacher," I confessed with a wry smile. "Although his style of _kenjutsu_ is unorthodox, he's proving to be a good training companion...as well as Shikamaru and his woman."

"Good to see you getting along with everyone else." I could hear the smile in his voice, and I tried not to get too 'giddy' at the notion that he was proud of me for being more congenial with those I would have once considered 'sinners' and beneath me. If only he knew just how 'well' I was getting along with someone in particular. I wonder what he'd say about that.

_Nii-san, what I am about to tell you is of the utmost importance. This can never be revealed; not even to the one you consider a lover. For you see, just like you, I seem to be heading in the direction where sin abounds in ways I could never imagine. I had assumed that once experiencing the pleasures of the flesh with a fellow male, I'd be over it. I naively believed it would be washed out of my system, and I'd want to return to the arms of a woman where I would bask and be reminded of mother's softness and warmth. However, it is proving to be a little more difficult than I had imagined. After that first night, nii-san, it was all I could think about. My body has never felt so alive than when touched by him. His kisses leave me breathless; hard, thorough and sometimes without the gentleness reserved for true lovers, and still I crave them like a drug. We have done nothing more than satiate carnal urges, bringing ourselves to completion in ways we usually do in our shameful solitude. I need not remind you of how sensitive my body is. I refer you to our younger days when tickling me would have me almost wetting myself while you laughed in mirth at my helplessness. But I digress. My body betrays me when touched intimately, nii-san. No matter how hard I try to control myself and prolong the inevitable, I find myself incredibly weak. It really makes me wonder how I managed to survive all these years in Orochimaru's presence, doesn't it? My 'ailment' has become worse in the two days I allowed myself to become his plaything as he was mine. His hands – calloused and firm – know just where to stroke to get me off. When he moans, I tingle with delight. When tears spring to his eyes, when he can no longer hold on and pleads with me to set him free, I relish in his suffering. And when he finally cries out in release, nothing has ever sounded sweeter, nii-san. The greedy side of me wants to keep him all to myself; to prevent anyone else from ever experiencing such heights of pleasure especially his choice of female companions. I admit it. I am jealous, nii-san, and it is a jealousy that's worrisome for I know that he does not feel the same way. To him, I feel this is all just fun and games as I try to convince myself of the same. Just like him, I want no real emotional attachment to this thing between us, for nothing good can come out of such trivial feelings. And yet...to be brutally honest, nii-san, I am dissatisfied. I want something **more** than this foreplay. I want to know what it's really like to be completely fused with him on an even deeper level. Do you understand what I mean, nii-san? Even thinking about it now fills me with shocked embarrassment, but I cannot help it. I think of it constantly; wishing, hoping he'd be the one to suggest we take things a step further. So what do I do now, nii-san? Simply wait? Or risk alienating him completely? For time is not on our side. Once he leaves, there is no guarantee that I'll ever see him again. Once his revenge is complete, what would make him want to return to Byaku-Shinkyou? What other motivation will he have to want to see me...us again? He will now be free to live his life the way he wants, and I'll be relegated to nothing more than a mere fling...a memory of a time he'd rather forget..._

"...suke? Sasuke? Are you still there?"

I literally had to shake myself out of my dazed stupor to focus on my brother's concerned query.

"I'm here," I reassured him quickly.

"Did you fall asleep?"

"No. Just...thinking about something."

"Ah...did you get what I just said though?"

I blushed lightly. "Uum...sorry. Could you repeat it again?"

He gave a barely audible sigh. "I didn't want to get you all worried for nothing, and we cannot really confirm this yet, but according to Juugo...you remember who he is, right?"

"Yes. One of the members planted within Byaku-Shinkyou."

"Correct. He was apparently a childhood friend of Kimimaro's and both have been trying to catch up on old times."

I wondered where Itachi was going with this story, but his voice sounded urgent, so I forced myself to pay attention.

"...something about having a lead and sending someone over here."

_Huh?_ I really sat up this time with my brows creased. "Say that again?"

Itachi sighed heavily. "As I said, I cannot confirm this, but I'd suggest you all be careful with your outings from now on. It seems like they might have a lead and someone might have been sent to scope out the city."

My head was beginning to whirl with all sorts of possibilities; my mind racing through all the different people we've met so far that could be suspects. It definitely couldn't be Sergei, since his main function seemed to be to train us all to death especially Naruto. So maybe it was Temari...Shikamaru's woman. Could she be the one responsible for leading Orochimaru's spy here? It was highly likely that she could be working for both sides. We didn't know much about her back story, so just how reliable was she?

"I know what you're already thinking," Itachi chimed in before I could open my mouth to tell him my theory. "But I can assure you that Temari is clean. She was never a part of any organization we are aware of, as Shisui and I did a thorough investigation, and besides, after her man was incarcerated for so long, do you really believe she'd want to work for someone like Orochimaru?"

I rolled my eyes and tried not to sneer too loudly. "Ever considered the possibility that Orochimaru might have convinced her that giving us away would reassure that she and Shikamaru would be able to live freely with no worries about being pursued for the rest of their lives? Most women are weak. I've seen how fickle their hearts can be especially with some of the cases I worked on in the past. Give them an incentive and most will sing like a canary at the drop of a hat."

"You are way too cynical, little brother," Itachi replied quietly. "But if you are so determined to accuse her of being a spy, why don't you question and test her yourself, hmm?"

"I intend to do that." And I really did. As soon as this conversation was over.

"Temari aside, has there been anyone else you might suspect as a possible spy?"

I ran through the files of memory in my mind, seeking out faces and trying to see where each one fit. There was that girl Naruto had met at the festival. I cannot recall her name now, but it had been odd how she had gravitated towards Naruto back then. However, Naruto had reassured me that he had given her no information about where we lived or his real name, so it was likely she was really innocent. There was Jiraiya of course, but his allegiance to Orochimaru was about as likely as he giving up women for the rest of his life. Then there was Jae Weong's friend – who acted as a driver sometimes when the other man was too busy – but he wasn't likely to betray us either. Was he? I had only met him a handful of times, and when he did speak, it was only to give instructions on what needed to be done. He lived on the first floor and was a certified loner. I doubted he was the one responsible for betraying us, or if he did, wouldn't Jae Weong be the first to know?

"Anyone coming to mind?" Itachi asked.

"No," I shook my head slowly. "Nothing at the moment, but I'm still going to be wary and caution the others as you suggested."

"Just make sure you do not make it seem too dire," Itachi warned. "There's nothing worse than planting the seed of paranoia within the minds of people and watching them self-destruct as every damn person they even stand next to becomes a suspect. I'd rather you kept this news to yourself until we can verify for certain that there is a plant in Buk-gu. For all we know, this person might be in another part of the country."

"Still not reassuring."

Itachi gave a light chuckle. "Fair enough. I figured you'd be stubborn about this. So...I am just about ready to sign off, little brother. Give my regards to Naruto whenever he returns."

"If I see him," I mumbled, but Itachi didn't hear me. With some last minute instructions and embarrassing motherly advice about making sure I get plenty of sleep and eat well (urgh. Why must he baby me all the time?), he hung up and left me alone to my thoughts.

_A plant in Buk-gu._ Well...not necessarily, but one could never be too cautious. I'd first alert Haku about this seeing as his gregarious nature was bound to get us in trouble.

Speaking of Haku...

(he's changing)

I stepped out of Jae Weong's office and almost got run down by one of the children that lived in the building. I gave a wan smile to his quick apology before he dashed outside to what looked like a cool evening. I entertained the idea of taking a walk since there was really nothing else to do for now. I could go back to the gym to train, but with Haku away _again_, and no Naruto to spend time with, I decided a quick walk around the neighborhood would suffice for at least an hour. Besides, it would give me an opportunity to stretch out my legs and see how far I could walk without straining anything.

Haku's changed. _This_...has changed him.

_This_ being the 'outside' world.

It would have been foolish of me to assume that such exposure to other elements besides what he got to see on a daily basis at Byaku-Shinkyou wouldn't have expanded his thinking and way of seeing things in general. In Byaku-Shinkyou, Haku had lived a sheltered life where all he knew was obeying orders and doing whatever was requested of him. He had no access to television or the news as I had not allowed him such pleasures. He hadn't gone shopping regularly or been to a laundromart or ridden in cars, buses, and boats. He hadn't been given the freedom to make friends as easily or engaging in random conversations with others whenever I was around. Haku's world had eventually come to revolve around me and only me, so it wasn't surprising that he was as devoted and loyal as he was.

However, we've been here for just over two months now, and _a lot_ can happen in two months I've come to find. Though he had always been easy-going and a talkative – especially when prodded, the 'outside' Haku had become a dam whose floodgates could barely be controlled...sometimes. He was willing to experiment and try new things, always feeding me stories of what shenanigans he and Karin had gotten into – from allowing himself to be dressed and made up as a girl (and playing a few tricks on some unsuspecting young men in the neighborhood), to daring to shoplift...just for kicks. He did admit they returned what they took eventually because he felt really bad about it. At least it was good to see he was still maintaining his integrity.

Beneath that, however, there were the more subtle but gradually visible changes when it came to _our_ relationship. Yes, we were still technically master and servant, but hadn't I told him that he would no longer have to regard me in such high esteem now we were no longer home? Hadn't he almost been in tears at the fear of me abandoning him? Hadn't he vowed that he'd never leave my side no matter what kinds of freedom he had been given? And hadn't I felt my heart swell with admiration at his candor?

Where was all that now?

Especially in the last week or so, his behavior has left me confused and rather bewildered. So yes, he still went about his duties; making sure all was well with me and taking care of me as deemed fit, but there was absentmindedness in his actions these days. It was as if he simply couldn't wait to leave my presence, a thin undercurrent of impatience whenever he'd have to wait for me to eat or take a bath. There were moments when he'd have a spaced out expression on his features, so much so, it would take me calling him about three times before he would even acknowledge my presence. However, the most obvious and perplexing change of all was his sudden (extra) interest in Naruto.

Perhaps I should have suspected something the first day of training with Sergei at the warehouse, and of how Haku had seemed unable to take his eyes off Naruto for the most part. At the time, I hadn't put much stock into it, simply assuming it was his same hero worship of the blond I was all but used to. However, looking back now, I should have seen the signs for what they were. I should have known that those heavy sighs he'd give every now and then – especially when he would be told that Naruto was not yet back from his training – were a sign of where my dear servant's loyalties now lay.

So when exactly did this all begin to happen? Wasn't it right after the night I had spent with Naruto?

I came to a halt beside an abandoned railroad track, where tall elephant grass stuck out from rusty rails and steel bolts that would never host another train in this lifetime. I kicked absently at a jutting piece of concrete and frowned in thought. I was trying to piece back the events of that morning to see if I had missed anything in particular.

For starters, I had awakened to silence; my initial panicked thought being that Naruto had fled in humiliation and disgust at what had taken place. However, seeing that he had taken the time to clean up the mess we created last night (read as being stained with our semen), including the hastily scribbled note he had left behind of going to take a bath, I realized it was perhaps an opportunity for me to leave without garnering the attention of anyone else. After all, we had promised to keep this a secret between us.

My hope, however, was that Haku would still be fast asleep, so I could avoid his queries of concern. I must confess I felt a little guilty not letting him know I was safe and sound before jumping into Naruto's bed. Knowing Haku, he must have been worried sick about me all night long. I mentally braced myself for the 'confrontation', but was surprised to find the apartment empty. I knew he couldn't have left the building, because his outdoor slippers were still in position beside the door, which could then only mean that he was probably having his bath...with Naruto.

I told myself not to be too concerned about that. It wasn't the first time those two had been alone in the bathroom before, and I did even entertain joining them – at least to make sure Naruto didn't accidentally slip up and reveal what happened between us the night before. I knew Haku's ability to prod the answer out of anyone, and it would have been quite easy to get Naruto to blab everything with just enough cajoling.

The next ten or so minutes would turn out to be the longest of my life as I replayed every possible horrific scenario, which almost always ended with Haku glaring at me with disgust and revulsion. After all, I was the very same master who had abhorred his relationship with Momochi Zabuza, and now...I was engaging in the very same thing. Wouldn't that make me a hypocrite in his eyes? How would I even begin to explain my justification for engaging in such an intimate relationship with Naruto when I did my best to discourage him from such things when he needed it the most?

And yet, while I agonized over my moral failures, seeing him walking into the apartment minutes later with flushed features and the most beautiful smile yet, had me wondering if I hadn't been worried over nothing. He seemed way too happy to see me again, and even went as far as giving me a quick hug in welcome. He later explained that Naruto had told him about our encounter with the thugs and our night in jail (and my stomach was in knots at this point), but luckily, Haku ended his story there. It meant Naruto kept his end of the deal by not exposing anything that took place in his apartment, and yet...recalling now, I should have read more into that knowing glint in Haku's eye at the time.

_He must have known. He must have guessed...figured it out. He might be loyal and obedient to a fault, but Haku was no fool. He was one of the sharpest knives in the drawer and could put two and two quickly. He must have known anyway!_

I cursed out loud as a sudden gust of wind nearly took me off my feet. Having to steady myself against an electrical pole for a second, I bit my lower lip and considered myself the biggest fool on the planet. What good would it do me now to confront Haku about that night? Where would I even begin the conversation? But most importantly...why wasn't he upset with me? I would have expected him to pout and complain about not bothering to let him know I was back, but I could only assume that my being 'alive' superseded any petty feelings about miscommunication.

Still...some things were not adding up. His eagerness to always be with Naruto for one thing, and those soft sighs or dazed countenances that he was prone to having every now and then. Just what did it all mean?

_And why should you care?_ Came the tiny voice that seemed to taunt me.

Shaking my head angrily, I made the decision to speak to Haku as soon as I returned, and yet the closer I got to our apartment building, the more stupid my decision became. Just how the hell was I going to approach him about the subject? _"Oh, hello Haku. I was just wondering why you keep daydreaming about Naruto and seem to act even more depressed now that he's occupied with our dear manly man Sergei? Is there something you'd like to share with me?"_ Bah. I really did have to stop over thinking every –

"Aah...ex...excuse me, please?"

I stiffened and turned my head a little at the soft question. For a second, the mousy-looking girl in the plaid overcoat did not register in my muddled thoughts until she gave a tentative smile and it all quickly clicked into place.

It was Naruto's 'friend' from the festival! What the fuck was _she_ doing here?

Our apartment complex was just a block away and yet this girl...how did she know where we...?

"I'm sorry for bothering you," she stuttered shyly in Korean. "But I was shopping over there and noticed you...you were with Kim Junghyun at the festival the other day, weren't you?"

I couldn't speak, or trust myself to speak. Not that it deterred her. She grinned and tucked a strand of her straight black hair behind an ear. She could be considered pretty in this light, but admiring her looks was the least of my concerns. I did not want her to know where we lived. For all I knew, she could very well be the fucking plant Itachi warned me about on the phone.

"...live around here?"

"What?" I asked aloud, my voice seeming to come from a mile away and quite harsh at that. She seemed taken aback at the tone and her smile became less friendly.

"I asked if Junghyun lived around here," she said warily. She clutched her handbag tighter to her chest as if afraid I would steal it. "I was hoping to see him again -"

"He already has a girlfriend," I stupidly blurted out before I could control myself. I really had no intention of saying that, or rather my mind had thought of saying some lie about not knowing who Junghyun was, but damn if my mouth didn't run away from me. Her expression, however, was both gratifying and sickening. The smile was now completely gone, and she looked genuinely shocked and saddened at the same time.

_Damn it. _

"Oh...I see..." She whispered and clutched the bag even closer to her as if hoping to draw strength from it. She lowered her gaze to prevent me from seeing the tears that were now filling the large brown eyes, but she wasn't fast enough. Her sniffle would have told the story anyway.

"I'm...I'm sorry for bothering you," she managed to squeak out. "I just...wanted..." With a firm shake of her head, she spun on her heels and strode away fast; nearly tripping over her leather boots before steadying herself and walking even faster.

_Great job, Uchiha Sasuke. You've managed to ruin yet another life...and you didn't even have to use a sword this time around. Your mouth is enough of a weapon in itself. _

Still, I wouldn't lie that a part of me wasn't glad she was no longer in the picture. The last thing we needed were 'outsiders' discovering who we really were. Waiting until I was sure she was no longer in the vicinity, I finally made the turn home and braced myself for an interrogation that might not be taken too well.

* * *

><p>And I was right.<p>

Shikamaru was all but ready to punch (or kill) me for my audacity, but I wasn't going to forsake my stance in the matter.

"It's okay," Temari was saying to appease the furious man beside her. "He does have a point, and I can see where he's coming from."

"You do? Because I sure as hell don't. His attitude really pisses me off," Shikamaru growled as I did my best to ignore him and admire what they had done to Itachi's former apartment. I hadn't assisted with the decorations when Temari was arriving, so this was unofficially my first time as a guest in their 'home', and I had a feeling it was likely to be the last. Not that I gave a shit.

"Sasuke," Temari said quietly, still holding onto Shikamaru's hand as if afraid if she let go, he'd spring up and clobber me. "I can assure you that I come from a neutral background and have no affiliation with Orochimaru or Danzo. If anything, I'd love the opportunity to kill him myself, but I realize that's a job reserved for you."

I focused my attention on the blond female, who had let her hair down this evening. I do believe it's the first time I've seen it this way, and I had to admit it made her look much more feminine and approachable. The black and red kimono she wore fit her nicely, though with the way she was sitting, its front was opened just enough to reveal a very well-endowed bosom...at least much curvier than Karin's.

Wait...why am I focused on her goddamn breasts?

"...when Shika was arrested," Temari was saying, and I shook my head a little to pay attention. However, she wasn't looking at me; rather her gaze seemed distant though she was now absently caressing her boyfriend's hand. "It was hell for me when he was taken away. Your fellow watchdogs wouldn't let me visit him at the local prison; saying I was denied my rights to see him until he was taken to Byaku-Shinkyou."

The way she spat out the words 'watchdogs', you'd think we were lower than filth; not that I blamed her for rationale for assuming as much. There were some officers that were despicable after all.

"So for three months, I pleaded for them to let me see him...even speak to him on the phone, but they refused. They made threats, saying that if I was to ever show my face again, they'd have everything I owned and knew destroyed. Can you imagine that? Still I refused to give up. I did my best to raise some money to hire a lawyer for him, but even that was denied. His crime was so, allegedly, grave that it would not require a trial. He would be judged and condemned by the powers that be at Byaku-Shinkyou, and if he was lucky, he'd be spared from Gudan by the merciful one..._you_."

I cleared my throat and squirmed a little. I could vaguely recall Shikamaru's sentencing, since I had done so many over the years, but I did remember that his crime wasn't that bad enough to warrant having his head chopped off. The haughty side of me argued that this frowning man before me owed me his life, and yet being imprisoned for two years over a drunken dare was hardly worth patting myself on the back for.

"Do you want to know what I really think about my accident?"

"Don't, Temari," Shikamaru cajoled softly. Now it was his turn to squeeze her hand and place a tender kiss on her cheek. "You don't have to -"

"I will," she insisted, with her gaze now trained squarely on me. It felt searing, scorching and accusing. If it were possible to burn me alive with her eyes, I was sure I would be nothing more than a pile of ashes in seconds. "I will say it because I believe it's the truth. They were out for me."

"They...?" I prodded with a raised brow.

"Yes. Maybe not you directly, but those who definitely worked for Orochimaru. They knew I was beginning to make noise by insisting that Shika be free. I had contacted several members of my local government and some councilmen, hoping they would make his case an example for the injustices being carried out by that madman's so-called purification rites. I wanted to expose Orochimaru for the joke he was, and on the day I was to go visit Shikamaru...I was 'conveniently' struck by an oncoming vehicle on the highway. I was lucky to get away with my injuries, but I was clearly left there to die."

"I hardly see how you can blame a random accident on us," I began in protest, though this sounded weak to me. This was Orochimaru we were talking about, and if Temari had really gone all out to make his life a living hell...

(they will stop at nothing to eliminate all obstacles)

"I know it sounds far-fetched, but how far-fetched is it to be struck by a truck in the middle of a highway with no traffic around for miles? You do know the highway leading to Byaku-Shinkyou, don't you?"

"Yes..." An endless desolate road that was bound to make sinners even more depressed as they approached their (possible) final destination.

"I could see it approaching me from the opposite lane, speeding up as it approached. I was confused as to why this damn truck was swerving into _my _lane, and before I could maneuver my car out of the way..."

She visibly trembled and I watched the color drain from her features; her eyes haunted as the memories of the day she almost lost her life came rushing back. Shikamaru held her tightly to him and placed a loving kiss on the top of her head. I couldn't hear what he was whispering to her, but I could guess he was trying his best to comfort her.

"She suffered extensive injuries," Shikamaru said quietly. His dark eyes watched me like a hawk, and as he spoke, he seemed to want to drill every single word into me. "Several fractured ribs, her lung almost punctured, a torn spleen, a fracture in her pelvis and second degree burns in an area I'd rather not show you. While I was locked away, she spent almost a year in the hospital and rehabilitation. Every damn yen I made in Byaku-Shinkyou was sent to her via Asuma for her bills. Are you aware of how hard and painful it is to know that you can do absolutely nothing for the one you love, living each day never knowing if the next news you hear will be her last? I put in petition after petition and it was always denied. All I wanted was for _one day_ to see her for myself...to hold her in my arms and tell her that I was still alive because of her, and it yet that little request was never granted. And why? Because to you all, I was nothing more than just another purified statistic that wasn't worth saving."

I winced inwardly for his was right. I had never seen them as anything more than -

"She almost lost her life for me, and now you come here...with your self-pretentious air trying to accuse her of being a traitor." He shook his head and gave a low snort of derision that made me want to suddenly bow my head in forgiveness. "Sometimes I really do wonder if you've learned anything at all from all this."

"Shika..." Temari squeezed him gently.

"Nah, it's okay, babe," he whispered back. "I don't expect anything different. We'll always be inferior to him. It's ingrained in his thinking after all. No matter what happens, the rest of us will never be good enough in his eyes."

_That's not true,_ I wanted to scream, but my voice remained stubbornly locked within my throat. I could only dig my fingers into my palms and struggle to find a way to apologize. Not just for this, but for...every damn thing he's experienced. He had a right to be bitter. Who wouldn't be after the story they've both shared?

_What...what do I do, nii-san? Asuma...if you were here...what would you suggest I do?_

"Shika doesn't really mean that," Temari was saying with a weak laugh. "He's just been bottling up a lot of frustration about everything and now -"

I couldn't let her finish, and even 'til today, I couldn't tell you why and how my body moved of its own accord to do this. And yet...here I was, on my hands and knees actually _bowing_ in apology to this man and his woman who had been wronged on so many levels. I could literally hear them gasp in shock at my action, and the old me was just about ready to have a heart attack as well.

"I am sincerely and deeply sorry," I muttered into the _tatami_ mat. "I know my words now seem meaningless to what you've been through, but from the bottom of my heart...I vow to make things right when I return to Byaku-Shinkyou. I can only ask that you find it in your heart to eventually forgive the sins committed against you."

The silence was deafening, but I didn't dare raise my head until I was sure they had forgiven me in some way. I did not expect to have them hugging me or singing my praises, but I definitely didn't expect to hear the sniffle that was a clear signal someone was crying. I doubted it was Shikamaru.

"You...you don't have to do that," he finally said in a gruff voice as if embarrassed on my behalf. I finally lifted my head to look at them, and sure enough, he was looking away, though still holding onto to the woman sobbing quietly against his chest. I think I have done enough damage for one day.

"I'll excuse myself," I said quietly. "And again, I apologize for barging in on you with such...accusatory tones earlier."

"No worries," Shikamaru replied with a light shrug. "We'll be on the lookout as well. We can't be too careful."

With a gentle shut of the door behind me, I leaned against the wall and expelled a soft breath of air in relief. For some reason, it felt like a little weight had been lifted off my shoulders, for one apology did not – in any way – make me less responsible for my actions over the years. However, I knew what I had done today was a start of sorts; a beginning of the righting of the ship that had been going off course since the murder of my parents. I could almost feel and see Asuma smiling at me at what I had done, and it felt really good.

Still, there was one other person I would have to give a proper apology to for I realized that despite our 'friendship', I was yet to fully tell him how sorry I was for simply being stubborn and petty with his sentencing. I smiled softly as I closed my eyes and entertained the idea of Naruto's shocked expression when I fell to my hands and knees. However, the sound of the bathroom door opening had me lifting my lashes quickly.

"Naru..." My lips parted to call out his name foolishly; perhaps assuming he had finally come back early today and was taking a bath (of course mentioning that my heart rate had quickened and I felt a little hot and flustered would be of no real consequence). All the same, my disappointment at seeing the familiar shock of red hair was too great. I sighed and leaned back against the wall, hoping she wouldn't notice me and simply walk into her apartment.

Should have wished/prayed harder.

"Sasuke?"

She blinked at me – since she was without her glasses – before breaking into a smile as she tied the sash of her pink bathrobe a little tighter around her waist. "What's wrong? Why are you out here?"

"I was just -"

"Ooh! Come, come!" She interrupted while reaching out to grasp my hand. Ignoring my protests, she all but dragged me into her apartment. "I found this really great balm at a local medicine store – they specialize in herbs and all that good stuff – and it's guaranteed to remove scars like magic!"

"Listen, Karin, I don't really -"

"Sit here," she instructed as she kicked the door shut and ran into the restroom to rummage through what sounded like a bag full of medication. "It's painless," she shouted to me as I reluctantly sat on a chair. My leg was beginning to 'hum' with pain now, but I could at least be glad that I had gone without crutches all day. Progress indeed.

"Here we are," she said breathlessly as she appeared again with what looked like a small jar filled with a murky, black substance. It didn't exactly look trustworthy.

"It's called '_saeng myeong ui ssi at_' – the seed of life," she explained as she knelt before me and twisted it open. Whew! The stench was repugnant to say the least. It was as if someone had left a bucket of boiled eggs to rot in a hot room.

"Are you seriously considering rubbing that disgusting thing on me?" I asked while doing my best not to cover my nose.

She took a deep breath and nodded firmly. "It's going to help with the scars...speaking of which, take off your pants."

"I don't think so," I retorted and tried to rise to my feet. "I must go back to my apartment. It's been a long day."

"Come on, Sasuke. This is to help you -"

"I appreciate your concern, but I'll be fine," I snapped impatiently. "Now if you'll excuse me."

I rose to my feet...maybe too fast, because the next thing I know, she was wheeling backwards; arms flailing to keep her steady but to no avail. She fell back in a graceless heap, revealing more than I would have cared to see. She had just stepped out of the shower after all, and besides Ino, this would be the second woman (well not counting the whores in Naruto's magazines) I've ever had the pleasure of seeing her private area...so...well...openly.

Heh...at least the hair color matched.

"Eeek!" she screamed and promptly sat up to cover herself, but her attempt to cover her lower region resulted in the top half of her robe opening a little wider, which now gave me a view of at least her left breast with its dusky rose nipple. I was alarmed to find myself reacting to the sight of this, a part of me blaming my earlier admiration of Temari's bosom to culminate in this unscripted moment.

Good grief! I _must_ get out of here!

"That's right," came the low words that seemed muffled and thick just as I placed my hand on the doorknob. "Run away as you always do. I must have some kind of disease I think." She gave a weak laugh and clutched the top of her robe between trembling hands. "I really don't know why you can't stand me or don't want to spend some time with me, but it's okay. I understand when I'm not wanted."

Where...what is this? Where is all this coming from? Have I been cursed today to make all females cry? And it is clear that she is crying, or at least close to it since her low sniffle and subsequent rubbing of her eyes tell the story. I curse inwardly, close my eyes and count slowly to ten.

What could be the harm? I had already made that girl on the street cry over my blunder/lie. I had gotten Temari emotional with my apology, and now...the least I could do was try to show that I wasn't a complete cad to this woman who has done nothing more than nurse me back to health as best she could. I lifted my lashes and took a deep breath before turning to face her again.

"Karin -"

"Go," she insisted firmly as she staggered to her feet. "You don't have to stay to feel sorry for me. I'm a big girl and I can deal with rejection. I've had to learn how to do so all this time, remember?"

"What are you talking about?" I asked in genuine confusion.

She gave a bitter laugh and turned to look at me; eyes red-rimmed from her silent tears and lips turned in what could pass as a sneer, but not quite. "From the start, you never liked me, did you? You were always comparing me to her, weren't you?"

"Her...?"

"Ino!" she snapped impatiently. She bent to pick up the small jar and for a second I wondered if she would fling it right out the window. Instead, her shoulders suddenly deflated and she looked lost and miserable. "I knew I could never compare to her...and it's even worse knowing that she had you first. She was just always so...perfect."

"No one is perfect," I replied automatically.

"She was," Karin insisted with a louder sniffle. "Who would look at me with my glasses and limp hair and stupid acne?"

"Karin -"

"I was only good for being everyone else's nurse, and no one gave a damn about my feelings." She sank onto the chair I had just left and lowered her head to her trembling hands. "I knew it was stupid to even allow myself to let this happen, but sometimes...you just can't control it, you know? Your heart...the heart is such a fickle thing and there are times I want to rip it out and stomp all over it...but you've been doing a damn fine job of that anyway."

Ouch. What could I possibly say to that?

She lifted her head to give me a weak smile. "I know I'm not stunningly beautiful, and I act like a boy more often than not, and I'm not as curvy as some of the other women you know, but...I thought...foolishly thought that for a second, you'd look past the outside and see how much I really ...cared about you..."

"I do care about you," I insisted as I took a step closer to her.

"No, you don't," she argued. "You care about me the same way as you'd care about...about some...some obligation you have to deal with. You don't see me as human, do you?"

"What on earth are you talking about? Of course I see you as human!"

"So why don't you like me?"

"Who said anything about not liking you?"

"You...you, insensitive jerk!" She stood up suddenly to strike me hard against the chest, almost sending me toppling to the floor in surprise. "You have no idea how you act sometimes, do you? The way you look at me as if I'm some bug crawling on the ground you want to squash, or how you talk to me as if I'm some mere slave of yours to order around. I can't stand it! You have no idea how much it hurts!"

She strikes me again, or would have, if I didn't reach out to grab her wrists. "Calm down," I hissed angrily. "If you were so upset about all this, why didn't you say so in the first place?"

"Like it's easy to talk to you?" she retorted. "At least Naruto makes an effort to be friendly, and I still wonder why I'm stupidly attracted to you and not him! At least Haku got it right with his feelings!"

"...what?" I asked in bemusement.

She shoved me away and sank back onto the chair; all the fight now gone from her. "You idiot," she groaned and shook her head. "Poor Haku...so sweet..."

"Will you stop that and explain what you meant by Haku getting his feelings right?" I snapped in annoyance, and yet I could feel my head thudding...my heart pounding as I realized I was probably about to hear something I wasn't ready for; something I was sure I was not going to be willing to accept.

Karin took a deep breath and tried to compose herself. "Yesterday," she finally began quietly, though she was still looking at me with a mixture of hate and love (I'm guessing). "Haku confessed his feelings to me."

"He's in love with _you_?" I asked incredulously.

Karin gave a short bark of laughter. "I wish. That boy is so gay, even he playing the role of straight guy would be next to impossible. Don't tell me you didn't realize this. You've lived with him for so long."

I sighed and ran fingers through my hair in frustration. "I am more than aware of Haku's sexual preferences, Karin. Do not patronize me."

"Well then," she smirked lightly and leaned back to cross her legs. "You'll never guess who our lovely pretty fairy has the hots for. Even without saying it out loud, I suspected something like that from the moment we met."

"What...what are you talking about?" My mouth was feeling incredibly dry; my tongue heavy in my mouth. I didn't want to hear it, but it was true. It must have been true all this time.

"I'm saying that Haku is head over heels for Uzumaki Naruto," Karin stated flatly. She shrugged lightly. "At first I assumed it was just infatuation over Naruto's brashness and worldliness, but...when you look at that kid's face when he talks about Naruto...you can tell. And it makes me so damn envious; I can't even begin to tell you." She gave a heavy sigh. "To be so honest with your feelings...it's a rarity these days. All I could do was wish him luck and hope he gets to tell Naruto how he feels. Naruto will probably not agree to it or might laugh and assume Haku's simply joking around, and it will hurt to be rejected – no fucking doubt about that – but...the way I see it...being in love sucks."

Haku...in love with..._Naruto_?

The world swam for a second and I had to close my eyes to re-orient myself again. I couldn't believe it...or maybe I could. I had seen all the classic signs these past few days, but I had remained stubbornly obtuse about it; refusing to acknowledge that Haku could even harbor such intense feelings for a man who was more than likely not to reciprocate them.

But then again, hadn't Naruto admitted that he found Haku just as attractive? And to make it worse, if Naruto could find our intimate encounters not as repulsive...what in the world stopped him from accepting whatever advances Haku made?

"What's wrong with you now?" came the weary yet guarded question from Karin. "You don't look so good. Is it that much of a shock that Haku feels that way for Naruto? Or is the thought of two men hooking up just disgusting to you?"

"No..." I croaked and then shook my head. "I mean...I have to go. Find...talk to Haku..." I was this close to rambling, but my mind was still in a tizzy. I did have to speak to my servant and hear this directly from him. I had no idea why this suddenly meant so much to me, but for my sanity's sake, I had to clear things up before...before...

(I lose him)

But who was I afraid of losing the most? I simply couldn't tell you.

Hardly saying goodbye to Karin – though I doubt she would have heard me anyway since she was so deep in her self-induced depression – I stumbled out of her apartment and into the quiet hallway. A quick glance at the bathroom showed that it was unoccupied (the door was slightly ajar and no light seeped through). Naruto's door was locked; a clear sign he was still not back and it was now almost eight in the evening, but as I approached my apartment, the smell of Haku's cooking permeated my senses and made me salivate. It was a reminder that I had not eaten anything in a while, and I would have loved nothing more than to be served in peace and quiet with no swirling thoughts about my servant's feelings for my current..._what_ exactly? Lover? Was that what Naruto was to me now? No...that word seemed far too intimate for what we had. There was no real love attached to what we did. We were simply two young men fulfilling a natural desire and nothing else.

"Ah! You're back, Sasuke-sama!" came the cheerful greeting from the kitchen as I stepped into what had now become my home away from home. His shopping (or sightseeing or whatever the hell he did these days) had gained us a new set of colorful Korean-themed sitting cushions, a basket of fresh fruit, two new potted plants and what looked like a snow globe featuring a beautiful figurine of a ballerina dancing. What oddities...and yet so Haku.

"Would you be taking a bath first or would you like supper first, Sasuke-sama?" he asked while stepping out of the kitchen.

He smiled, looking absolutely no different than he usually did. His hair was down tonight, and the dark blue kimono fitted him nicely. He swayed a little on his feet, as if dancing to unheard music (though the T.V. was on and a singing competition of some sort was being held at the moment), but with his hands clasped behind him – he really looked like an innocent child eager for praises from a guardian. It was all I could do not to reach out to pat his head gently, though he was almost as tall as I was.

"Sasuke-sama?" he asked again, the smile wavering a bit. His large brown eyes seemed to shift ever so slightly as if perhaps aware that I knew what he had been hiding from me all this time. "Is everything all right?"

_No. Nothing is all right. I cannot allow you to have those kinds of feelings, Haku. Do you not understand how complicated you are bound to make things? And besides, what would you do if Naruto turns you down? You are too innocent to deal with the pain of rejection, but then again, who am I to tell you how to feel about such things? Look at what I did to Karin. _

"I will eat first," I finally managed to say through lips that felt dry. I licked them nervously and settled onto the cushion, which he was quick to explain he had purchased at a thrift store for a killer deal. As he chattered on about his day, I struggled to find a way to ease into the conversation about Naruto, and yet every time I felt I could get a word in, he'd find something new to talk about. It was as if he didn't want me to speak at all!

Finally having enough, I stuck my chopsticks into my bowl loudly, which in turn had him freezing in mid-speech with his chopsticks in mid-air. The look he gave me was as if I had caught him doing something illegal, but he eventually lowered his gaze and bowl to ask quietly.

"Is there something wrong with the food, Sasuke-sama? You've hardly eaten anything."

"How long have we known each other, Haku?"

He looked up again; this time the guilt was like a beacon that was, however, quickly erased with a guarded look that was unlike the Haku I knew. "If you mean on a personal level, Sasuke-sama...then for over two years...if you mean otherwise, then since we were children."

I nodded and picked at one of the succulent grilled shrimps he had prepared. "And during the time you've been with me as a servant...would you consider me a good master?"

"...yes..."

I eyed him carefully. "Yes? Is that all?"

"What do you want me to say to you, Sasuke-sama?"

I sighed and lowered the chopsticks again. "Listen...Haku. I realize that Byaku-Shinkyou made you live a sheltered life, and now that you're out in the real world...things might seem a little...overwhelming. You want to do new things and experience new things and...well...it can lead to situations you may not want to find yourself in."

He was looking at me as if I had grown a second head, and I couldn't blame him. Even I didn't know where I was going with this.

"What I'm trying to say is," I cleared my throat and spoke a little firmer. "Emotions run high and sometimes what you think is one feeling might actually be nothing more than infatuation that will wear out eventually. I just...I just don't want to see you get hurt, that's all."

There was a silence so heavy; I could hear nothing but my heartbeat drumming in my ears. He had lowered his gaze as if in thought...mulling over my words. I watched a gamut of emotions flicker across his face before he whispered softly.

"So he told you?"

"...what?"

"Naruto-kun," he continued in that same whisper that felt pained. "He must have told you what happened in the bathroom then."

My stomach dropped, but I did my best to control my features. I knew I'd have to lie again...if only to hear the truth.

"Yes," I said with a slow nod. "He...told me."

Haku sucked in a harsh breath and formed a fist on his thigh. "He promised he'd keep it a secret!"

Keep _what_ a secret? Just what the hell did you two do in there?

"Haku..."

"You weren't supposed to know, Sasuke-sama," Haku blurted out, now lifting his head to reveal a face that was flushed with indignation and pain. "Although it was partly my fault for...for doing that, it was still none of your business!"

What in the world...? How dare he speak to me like that!

"Haku," I began with a low growl. "You must remember -"

"But you said it yourself, Sasuke-sama," he said with a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. "Out here, we are no longer really master and servant."

"We might not adhere to the strict rules of Byaku-Shinkyou, but you will recall who rescued you from the clutches of Orochimaru," I hissed coldly.

"Maybe I would have been better being back there," came the low mutter that was a direct slap to the face. It hurt, but at the same time a fury unlike any other, for this young man who claimed to be devoted to me, was enough to make me want to strike him.

"Get away from my sight," I said quietly, while counting inwardly to ten to control my temper. "This conversation is over."

"Why? Because I did something you are now guilty of?"

"Haku. That order was _not_ open for negotiation. This conversation is _over_."

But unlike the meek and docile Haku of the past, this new version no longer felt awed by my presence. Or maybe this Haku had been buried within him all this time, and it was simply his moment to be set free from the shadows. With tears in his eyes, he slammed his fist upon the low table in frustration. "Why are you so upset with me, Sasuke-sama? Is it because of what I did to him? Or is it because of my feelings for him?"

"I do not really give a flying fuck what your feelings are for Naruto," I replied coldly. "The bottom line is that it will not be reciprocated. He will not return them and you'll only be hurt. Is that what you want to deal with for the rest of your life?"

"And why wouldn't he return them?" came the low question that had me shuddering at his stubbornness. "Is it because you believe he _belongs_ to you?"

I sucked in a harsh breath at the accusation that struck a chord deep within me. That was it, wasn't it? The reason why I was so bitter and angry at this 'revelation' was all because of my deep-seeded desire to have and own Naruto completely. I was supposed to have no competition in this; not that girl from the festival and especially not from my own _servant_. This was preposterous.

"It's true, isn't it?" Haku repeated with a smile though it felt cold and bitter. "You think he's now your property just like everything else you've ever gotten in your life. You...you who always looked down on me whenever I spoke of my love for Zabuza-san. You who lectured me about the sins of the flesh and how I was bound to be sent to the depths of hell for the way I felt for another man. You who could never understand what it felt to be separated from the one you loved simply because of your archaic doctrines." He shook his head slowly as if disappointed in me, and for a moment, I did feel an ache within; a realization that he was right in accusing me of being nothing more than a hypocrite. "I saw you that night...you and Naruto-kun in the hallway, and I couldn't believe my eyes."

_Oh no...oh God no...no...please no...this is even worse than I imagined!_

"You spent the night in his apartment," Haku continued in that same quiet tone that kept driving the nails of accusation deeper within me. "Do you honestly believe that I'm that naïve to assume nothing took place between you two? Do you have any idea how much it hurts to know that the one person you do end up having such deep feelings for...ends up in the arms of someone who once ridiculed you over the same actions? I couldn't reconcile the fact that you were now happy with Naruto-kun..._of all people_. And to be honest, Sasuke-sama, it was one of the reasons I went down on Naruto-kun...to pay you back for how miserable and guilty you made me feel over being with Zabuza-san."

He gave me a sad smile that was compounded by a tear running down his cheek. "I know Naruto-kun will never reciprocate my feelings, but there is no law that says I can't keep trying until he finally acknowledges me in some way. That day may come, or it may never come, but I have resigned myself to whatever fate has in store for me. Still, I can take a little solace in knowing that maybe...just maybe you are already going through something like that, and you still don't know it yet."

"I can assure you that my feelings for Naruto are not as...involved as yours," I somehow managed to say in a voice that sounded anything but mine. I felt small and empty – simply devoid of any emotion. "So you are welcome to keep fighting for his affections as you wish to."

He stared at me for a long searching moment. "Really?"

"Yes...really."

He gave a barely visible nod, lowered his head, and I watched with bemusement as his shoulders began to shake a little. It wasn't until he threw back his head to laugh out loud, did I realize he wasn't experiencing a seizure of some sort. It was a mirthless sound; this laughter of his, and I almost felt it was mocking me in some way.

"Ah, Sasuke-sama," he chuckled with a breathless giggle when he was finally in control of himself. "You really aren't that good a liar, are you?"

I felt my cheeks burn. "I don't understand what you mean."

He chuckled again and sighed. "Your feelings for Naruto-kun...you just don't realize it yet, do you?"

"As I have said -"

"Yes, you did say you feel nothing for him, so...why did you look furious when I mentioned I had gone down on him? How did you react when _he_ told you about it? Hmm? Knowing you, you would have sulked all day and hardly spoken a word to me."

My cheeks were now literally flaming for I was clearly caught. I did tell you that Haku was one of the sharpest knives in the drawer, didn't I? It was obvious that he damn well knew Naruto had told me nothing of the sort to begin with.

"Haku, I -"

I wasn't sure of what I was going to say, but I needn't have bothered for he suddenly reached out to gently cup my cheeks within his warm hands, forcing me to look into those beautiful brown eyes any sane man would fall helplessly in love with.

"I do not regret what happened between Naruto-kun and I, for it was something I _chose_ of my own free will, Sasuke-sama. It was a decision I made for _me_, and not to please anyone else. For years I have lived under the thumb of someone...including you, and though I will forever remain grateful for your kindness to me, you – and Naruto-kun - have also taught me something quite important, which is to find my own voice and to become my own person. I have buried this side of me for almost eighteen long years, Sasuke-sama, and I can only think this is a blessing or a sign from the gods, that it is time for me to grow up. We are no longer under the shackles of master and servant, but my vow to you will remain and that is to be by your side for as long as you need me."

He absently caressed my cheeks with his thumbs, seemed to take a deep breath before continuing in a voice that was barely audible. "However, and until Naruto-kun blatantly denies my overtures, I _refuse_ to give him up to you that easily, Sasuke-sama. You will have to earn his true feelings just like everybody else for you will soon learn the very first lesson about loving someone else truly, madly, deeply."

"...and what is that?" I whispered as he smiled and placed a tender kiss on the tip of my nose. It was a gesture that was so loving and kind; it almost brought tears to my eyes.

"That love hurts, Sasuke-sama. More than you'll ever know."

* * *

><p>He arrived sometime past one in the morning; the dull ping of the elevator heralding his arrival.<p>

My first instinct was to get up and see him...even if it was just a glimpse before he turned in for the night, and yet I could not get my body to move off the futon.

(I am a coward)

I gripped the blanket tightly and cursed bitterly into the darkness; Haku's light snores my only companion in my brief moment of self-doubt and despair. I stole a quick look at the lump beneath the blanket beside me, envious that he could sleep so soundly after such an earth-shattering conversation earlier in the evening. I don't think I've stopped trembling since he released me from his soul-piercing speech and pretending as if our little argument hadn't happened at all. We barely spoke to each other, and I had made my escape by taking a bath for almost an hour – left alone to thoughts that swirled and made me almost sick with the direction they were going.

Haku had just about proclaimed himself as my rival...for Naruto's affections of all things!

I would laugh at the incredulous notion if I wasn't still feeling taken aback at the whole situation. Just how the hell had things ended up this way? _Why_ had things ended up this way? The crux of the matter was that I was in a no win situation. If Haku's feelings were not reciprocated in the long run, would that make me happy? Was I content to watch him wither away in his pain and suffering at the knowledge that Naruto didn't feel the same way for him? And what if the situation was reversed? What if Naruto ended up - and I highly doubt this - but for the sake of argument that he ended up having those kinds of feelings for me...then what? I would still be unable to find any joy in that for I'd know it was at the expense of someone I cared about.

Bottom line Haku was making things extremely difficult with his confession tonight, and I knew now that this was probably a sign from the gods about my wayward decisions. I could not win this fight; not without causing further damage to others. This was my punishment for daring to assume that this kind of a lifestyle was even to be considered after my upbringing.

/ _The person whose mind is always free from attachment, who has subdued the mind and senses, and who is free from desires, attains the supreme perfection of freedom from Karma through renunciation._ /

I sighed and squeezed my eyes shut at the inevitable. I would have to nip this in the bud before it became something uncontrollable and disruptive to the lives we now led.

Yes...that was definitely the best way to deal with this. I could almost feel the old me swelling with victory at finally making the new me see reason. I had been weak in mind and body, but it was time to take control of them again. Besides, Haku was more than welcome to have him. I could always make Karin a suitable companion and prove to her that I wasn't such an insensitive jerk after all.

Decision made, I pep-talked myself to my feet and slipped out of the room as noiselessly as I could. I was sure to tighten the sash of my house robe, that way Naruto wouldn't assume I was trying to come onto him so late at night. However, I sincerely hoped he wasn't already asleep for if he was going to keep up with his schedule, this was the only time I could catch him and explain things to him before he vanished again in mere hours.

"Just say it quickly," I muttered as I wrapped my arms around my waist and tried to steady my thudding heart and trembling legs. "Just make this as quickly as possible..."

The sound and sight of the door to his apartment suddenly opening nearly had me choking on my words. I froze in mid-stride as he shuffled into the hallway dressed in nothing but a pair of shorts, a towel draped around his neck and carrying his usual basket of toiletries. He hadn't noticed me yet, but it was enough for me to drink him in and to see what only three days of training with Sergei had done to Naruto's physique.

My God. He was fucking..._ripped_.

Those once slender and somewhat slumped shoulders now seemed to have broadened a little; more wiry and taut with muscles accumulated from doing so many pushups (and goodness knows what other strict regiment Sergei was putting him through). The shorts hung low on lean hips that I had once explored before kneading that finely toned buttocks. My fingers itched with desire, for I could still feel every damn clench of those muscles while he had exploded with his orgasm. The insane urge to savor every inch of that back and suck on his flesh had me biting back a groan of need. So much for adhering to my doctrine. I _needed_ this man like a junkie desperate for his fix – and yet here I was about to do something that would kill me...at least physically.

"Sleep walking again, Sasuke?" came the low but weary question that had me blushing in embarrassment since I had been caught staring. He was at the door of the bathroom, his features illuminated from the lights he had turned on. He looked haggard and just about dead on his feet, and my heart literally stirred with an emotion so intense it was almost painful. I didn't understand it, but I wasn't about to stand here to question why such a 'motherly' instinct to embrace and reassure him that everything was going to be all right, was downright overwhelming.

"Want to keep me company?" he asked with a nod into the bathroom, a small smile on his visage that I would have reciprocated, if it wasn't for the sudden memory of Haku telling me just what had taken place in there a few days ago.

_You were never planning to tell me about it anyway, were you, Naruto? You and Haku would have kept it your dirty little secret if the truth hadn't been revealed to me, wouldn't you?_

Allowing this (un)justified emotion of betrayal to supersede my lust, I felt a little more in control of my emotions and able to continue with what I had planned to say in the first place.

"Tempting," I replied neutrality, "But...I just wanted to say something quickly before going back to bed. I know you've got a long day tomorrow."

He raised a brow and said nothing; simply waiting for me to speak again.

"What..." I cleared my throat for I had sounded like a dying frog. "What happened between us the other time...was a mistake. I...we got carried away with our desires and it resulted in what happened in your apartment. Anyway, to cut a long story short, I wanted to apologize for giving you the impression that our actions will be a continuing occurrence ... because it will not."

Naruto stared at me for a long minute as if uncomprehending of what I was babbling about, before running his fingers through his hair and giving a heavy sigh. "So...you pretty much regret what happened, right?" he finally asked in a voice that sounded flat and cold.

"Yes...that is what I'm saying."

"So...we're done with all that, right?"

"Precisely."

"No more touching, kissing...all that shit, right?"

"Yes. No more."

He seemed to ponder this for all of a second before shrugging. "All right then. Whatever you say, Sasuke. Anything else you want to share with me?"

Wait...where was the argument? Where was his anger at me breaking this off? Why wasn't he more upset? Did he just not care or was he already thinking of his next time with Haku? I opened my mouth to rage on him for that, but realized that I was only going to sound like I gave a damn. Wasn't my purpose to break this tentative bond between us as cleanly as possible? Besides, it was clear he was still not going to reveal what had taken place between him and Haku, and for some reason, that hurt more than anything else.

(but he didn't reveal what happened between you two to him either. Haku was just 'lucky' enough to catch you both in the act. At least, Naruto's keeping the end of the bargain by not blabbing about your infidelities.)

"It was a sin," I said flatly as I tightened my arms around me as if to protect myself from the inscrutable expression now leveled at me. "You know it as well as I do...whatever we did...was nothing more than a sin."

"...sin, huh?"

I couldn't look him in the eye anymore. I stared at a point above his head and wished he'd turn away already.

"Well," he said with an exaggerated sigh. "Guess I'm gonna have to purify myself in a bit. Wouldn't want to remain stained from all that sin we've been infecting each other with, would I?"

And with a mock bow and a two-fingered salute, he finally left me standing alone and cold in the empty hallway, but not before slamming the bathroom door shut loudly behind him – a gesture that spoke so much of his mindset over what had just taken place.

He was angry.

He was angry and that showed that he _cared_ after all. Or was I simply projecting my feelings onto him? If he really did care about me..._us_...would he have been so quick to give in to Haku's flirtations? And yet as I lay on my futon and thought even more about it, I realized that Naruto's behavior was not all that unusual. He did not know my true feelings about what we had done that night, and as I had always assumed, our foreplay was simply nothing more than an experiment in something new and exciting. Why would he attach anything emotional to it? Why would I expect him to feel the same way I do? If I had come to know Naruto by now, I should be aware that he wasn't the kind to dwell too much on the consequences of his actions. He was prone to act first and think later, and though this has helped him a lot in the past, it had gotten him in trouble as well.

I was not a woman, and in Naruto's world, I did not 'fit' into the conventional role of a normal relationship. To him, there as nothing 'normal' about what we did. It just simply felt good to him and that was all there was to it. To compound matters, the break up tonight would be taken the wrong way for I had been unable to tell him the real reason behind it. He would only assume the worst of me, and I tried to convince myself that I could and would deal with it...if only to show Haku that I meant every word I said.

_Whatever will be, will be._

I would leave those two to make their own beds and lie in it – figuratively or literally; and sincerely wish them the best of luck.

Little would I know just how much Haku's words would eventually come to haunt me in the worst way possible.


	30. 30: Needful Things

**Notes:** Isn't it vexing to read a story and expect the storyline to go one way, but it turns out not to go as you expected? Haven't we all read so many stories by now that we _feel_ we are able to detect what **should** happen next or how a character **should** act or feel based on how we (the readers) would react in such a situation? I mean, hell, it should be the logical progression of things, shouldn't it? "But based on what we've read so far, shouldn't so-so-so-and-so be like this? I mean, I don't get it. Why is he doing this and that and this and that? It's not supposed to happen that way, gosh darn it!" It's okay. I've been in your shoes as well and have read novels (some of which have turned out to be my favorites of all time) where the writer makes me think outside the box and step out of my comfort zone. If I had expected a typical love story, then I would been sorely disappointed although he/she/it has it done in a way that will make me go "ah ha! That was well worth the head scratching and Imma-throttle-this-writer-if-he/she/it-doesn't-give-me-what-I-want-in-the-next-chapter!"

The trying thing about writing (and reading) a story in the first person POV is that you get to see things from only **one** character's perspective at a time. You are not allowed to know what the other person is thinking and it leaves you frustrated or unhappy when he/she/it does not react to the POV's thought processes. In this case, writing about two completely different people with completely different thought processes is a challenge in itself. Sasuke and Naruto are **not** supposed to be alike. They are not supposed to be on the same wavelength (at least right now), hence their POVs are going to be vastly different and regarded as such by you. As many of you have already pointed out, Sasuke is more in-depth with his thoughts. Whenever I write his section, I feel more introspective and 'deep', and that is why most of you are able to relate and feel more for him with his situations. Naruto, on the other hand, is like a powder keg in my mind. When I get to his section, I feel more frenzied and the thoughts fly so quickly, it's sometimes hard to put down into words. It's the way I view the character Kishimoto has created; a man who does have a good heart, but is not likely to spend ten pages ruminating over something that's happened or will happen. It's why I've noticed that more of you find you cannot really 'relate' or 'feel' for him because he is not giving you much to work with. Just because he does not spend time 'thinking' so hard, does not mean he doesn't have his own issues to deal with. Both men do things differently, so their blunders or triumphs will be viewed just as well.

We must also bear in mind that our thoughts are fluid; ever changing even as you sit here and read this. So just like you, the characters are allowed to think dumb thoughts that you (the outsider) see for what it is...but can't do much about because you can't go into the screen to bitch slap them as much as you want. *lol* In the minute they loathe a person, the next they're likely to change their mind about them with the right situation in place.

Bottom line, dear Reader, it is **not** my position to tell you how to think or force you to think a certain way when you read a chapter, so your passionate feedback lets me know that you are invested in these characters and that the story has resonated in some way with you. That, my dears, makes me a very happy panda. If I got lackadaisical feedback, then I'd start to worry I wasn't doing my job in making you think a little harder about what's going on.

In conclusion, of this long ass rambling, thank you for your comments/criticisms and everything else in between. They are all read and digested...but don't really influence much of what or how I planned the story anyhow. So who knows? Some of you might end up walking away from this with plans to burn me at a stake or you'll be nice and fax me some cake or ice for my fingers. *lol*

And to those who took the time to wish and send me your condolences, I really do appreciate it. I've done well not to cry since that day, but I'm sure the tears will come flooding out when the funeral comes around. And yes, he'll probably tell me to shut up now and get to writing the next chapter, so enjoy!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 30:<strong>

**Needful Things**

_The deer on pine mountain,  
>Where there are no falling leaves,<br>Knows the coming of autumn  
>Only by the sound of his own voice.<em>

_**-Onakatomi no Yoshinobu**_

* * *

><p><em>Naruto:<em>

_To become an assassin is to be devoid of any human emotion when it comes to a kill. Leave all regrets and doubts before you begin a mission. You have one task and only one opportunity to eliminate the target with zero room for error. A mind clear and free from any and all convoluted thoughts is crucial. Be as still and in control as the weapon within your hands. Remember – at all times – that you are an unseen presence to your target. You are the shadows. You are nothing but the wind._

"Are you ready, Uzumaki?"

"I guess -"

"What was that?" came the thunderous roar that had my ears ringing. His angry spittle sprayed on my face, but I knew better than to wipe it off now. He'd go mental on me.

"I'm ready, _sir_!" I replied in a tone that would appease him. Pale blue eyes narrowed with wariness as they scrutinized me, perhaps wondering if I was sassing him this early in the morning. When he seemed satisfied that I wasn't about to break into a wisecrack, he nodded curtly and motioned for me to move into position.

"Today, we are going to the next level," he snapped as I sat on the cold, dusty and dirt-infested floor, while reaching for the weapon that was now as familiar to me as my own hand.

For the past three days, I had been taught the nuances and characteristics of sniper rifles, and after spending most of yesterday testing out the different brands in Sergei's arsenal, he (we) came to the conclusion that I was most comfortable with the bolt-action M40A3. I could set up the barrel, the stock with its cheek piece, load in the cartridges and adjust the all important telescopic sight within two minutes – which was still slow according to Sergei's lofty standards. The guy could disassemble and reassemble an entire rifle in at least a minute, if not less, and though he had timed and given me hell for over two hours the other day for how slow I was, he figured we'd have to move on from that particular lesson. There would be no shortage of things to bitch to me about later anyway.

"So far, you have been practicing with immovable objects and birds and the such, eh?" he growled as he paced above and around me. "And I am impressed with your night vision, but today, we are going to try something a little different, which is why I brought you up here."

Here being the top floor of an abandoned apartment building on the west side of town. This area, in general, was quite derelict and a sign of how poorly the government had managed its city so far. Some of the buildings here were unoccupied except for the homeless and junkies who needed places to crash for the night. Boarded or shattered windows, brick walls with flaking paints, steel frames rusting beneath earth's elements, it all made for a scene right out of horror movie. The stench of accumulating garbage (and toilets that were far from good working conditions) coated the air like an unwanted shield. Trees and shrubbery outgrew man's ability to curtail, and in the end, you were left in an area of the world that was all but abandoned to Nature's greedy claws.

However, it was perfect for anyone trying to learn how to snipe, and this has been my training ground with Sergei for the most part. My daily regiment included being picked up by him at an ungodly hour in the morning, only for him to drop me off barely a block away from our apartment and force to me to run after the car in what could be considered an intense cardio workout until we arrived at our destination. By then, I was just about ready to drop dead in exhaustion – we are talking about five miles of running! At least I was lucky he wasn't making me do it under the scorching sun, and yet despite it being cool so early in the day, I still ended up drenched in sweat. Every muscle in my body especially my legs, would be one aching mass; trembling so bad, that I'd immediately cramp up the second I stopped to take a break.

I tolerated his berating by calling me weak and hopeless, though he was _kind_ enough to give me some water to quench my thirst. However, just when I think he'd give me an extra few minutes to breathe, he'd have me starting up a whole other set of exercises including that damn push-up routine. He was determined to get me to do the one-fingered push-ups, but that was one thing I had put my foot down on. I could barely hang on with the two-handed system. What the hell made him think I was going to start up on his crazy style of working out?

By mid-morning, I was ready to call it quits, but after a light breakfast – provided by him – it was then time to work on my shooting skills. Sergei always carried with him a hefty black bag (think body bag size), which he would unravel like a kid in a candy store to reveal all the weapons in his arsenal. I swear the man must have raided an artillery factory, because some of the shit he had were rare and pretty damn powerful. From small firearms to his beloved sniper rifles, he'd make me learn them all by heart, including how to clean and assemble each. Memorization was never my strongest suit and it was a pain to have to recall every single thing, but considering Sergei's short fuse and low tolerance for bullshit, let's just say I've been cuffed one too many times for my liking.

I hated this guy, and yet I knew he was an indispensable teacher. I would only have to keep gritting my teeth and bearing with the pain until it was over. It did help that all I had to do was remember why I was putting myself through this, and it would make the physical (and mental) punishments more tolerable.

So far, I've been able to aim and take out assigned targets as far as 2,000 meters, though they mostly involved inanimate objects or the occasional oblivious bird perched here and there. Once he made me shoot a sickly looking cat licking its paws; something that made my stomach churn with disgust and dismay as the poor thing went up in a splatter of fur, guts and blood. It hadn't even had the time to give one last meow; at least the birds I shot got to squawk a little.

_Now just imagine that as someone's brain, Naroot, and you should be all set._

I shuddered and shook my head to rid myself of that image, while setting up and wondering if I was going to be shooting any more animals today. There were quite a few squirrels, stray dogs, and rabbits around after all.

Unfortunately, as I slid in the cartridges – while Sergei was busy scooping out my next target with his high-powered binoculars – I knew today was going to be extra difficult in the concentration department.

/It was a sin. You know it as well as I do...whatever we did...was nothing more than a sin. /

_That asshole! It wasn't a sin when you were calling out my name and biting my shoulder or nearly ripping my skin off when you fucking came, was it?_

I nearly took off a finger as a cartridge got jammed in the barrel; barely acknowledging the wary look thrown my way by Sergei. At the moment, all I could hear was that cold statement from Sasuke as he pretty much said he was sick of me. I mean, that was all it boiled down to, wasn't it? He had had his fun and now he wanted to move on. And yet the funny thing was, the last time we did it, he hadn't given off any vibes that he wanted it to end. So just what the hell happened in these past few days I haven't been around much? Was it because of Sergei? Was my absence causing him to doubt what he had instigated in the first place?

Or wait...

I stiffened as it hit me all at once on why Sasuke would have done something that.

_Haku!_ Haku must have told him _everything_!

I mean, what other possible reason was there for stopping what had been such a damn enjoyable thing between us? It was something I had somehow - in some dumb way - come to see as our 'alone' time. I mean, I know we are alone when we do it, but I mean...urgh! Wish I was more eloquent when it comes to shit like this. It's just that whenever we're done getting each other off, the lull after that is kinda..._nice_, you know? Especially after the last time...

* * *

><p>"Stop looking at me like that," I muttered in embarrassment. Though I was still tingling and warm and flushed all over from coming so fucking hard (again!), just seeing those dark eyes staring right into me made me feel downright hot and bothered.<p>

(flustered and confused)

"Like what?" he asked; his voice husky with content. He too looked 'spent' in a good way; flushed, hair all in disarray, lips swollen with our frenzied kisses, and a smile that I swear had my stupid heart skipping a little. Strange - as the only time I remember me feeling this mushy after a make out session was with Sakura. But then again, the past two days had been nothing short of interesting, and I was learning something new each and every damn second. I mean, a girl could only do so much to bring a guy to his breaking point, but in reality, you realize that it has to take _another_ guy to understand just what little thing needed to be touched to send you completely off the edge. Funny how that all works out, doesn't it? Guess it all makes a little more sense now why gay dudes were happy in their relationships.

"Like you want to go snooping around inside my soul or something," I grumbled and looked away, though my cheeks flamed from the low chuckle my response elicited.

He cupped my cheek and forced me to face him, his lips sealing mine again – not in a torrid kiss like before – but in a toe-curling sweet way that made my insides want to melt like chocolate under the sun or something like that. I (or him) moaned as every part of my body began to thrum again with helpless anticipation. We knew we couldn't risk having another go - since the others might return soon - so by the time we broke apart for air, we both knew we in trouble.

"That's not fair," I whimpered against his lips; wanting more...needing more of him. "You did that on purpose."

"I didn't hear you complaining when it was happening," he whispered back with a look that screamed 'hunger'. "We should clean up, don't you think?"

"I don't want to."

"I don't want to either, but it has to be done."

"Well...it's your turn anyway," I replied with a light smirk. "I had to do it last time, remember?"

He blushed and tried to cuff me, but I ducked and sat up quickly, only to push him onto his back with a growl. Not content to have me towering over him, we mock-wrestled as if we were kids, giggling and laughing helplessly until I finally had the upper hand by pinning him to the floor and seizing his lips in a hard kiss that left no room for argument or compromise. To say he responded just as hard would be an understatement.

_Damn._

He didn't even bother pushing me off when we broke apart again, and in this position – as I stared into the flushed visage below me with those dark eyes that seemed to glow with a light I had never seen before – I found myself ready to spill _everything_ to him. This was it. I was going to confess about what had taken place in the bathroom and how Haku had come onto me and my powerlessness to resist, or at least be brutally honest and admit that I had _wanted_ to let it happen. I knew he wouldn't be too happy, but at least I would have gotten it out in the open and off my conscience. If he never wanted to hang around with me again after this, then I guess it was all right. It would suck (funny how one gets addicted to shit like this fast), but at least I would deserve it for not being honest with him in the first place.

"Sasuke, I..."

/Please, please, pleeeeease promise you won't tell Sasuke-sama about this. I know you two are close now, and you're likely to reveal this eventually, but please...for now, just keep it between us, will you, Naruto-kun?/

_Shit._

"What is it, Naruto?" came the quiet question beneath me.

"No...Nothing," I finally squeaked out with a weak smile; feeling my stomach tighten with just how difficult a position I was in. So much for my earlier thrill at being pleasured by two men and hoarding their secrets. Now, it was _really_ beginning to sink in how precarious my situation was.

"This is the second time you've started saying something and not finished it," Sasuke pouted, reaching up to pinch my nose playfully. "You wouldn't be hiding something from me, would you?"

_You have no idea._

"Yeah, I am actually," I muttered instead. "...and it's about ready to say hello to your little friend in a bit. Here...touch it -"

"Stop it, Naruto. You are so disgusting," came the half-hearted complaint, though he did oblige my request with a breathless sigh.

And that was that. My chickening out, compounded with Haku and Karin returning less than ten minutes later, sealed whatever opportunity I had to second guess my decision to keep quiet. I didn't want to hurt Haku, and at the same time, I didn't want to piss off Sasuke either. I knew those two had a great relationship, so if I opened my big mouth and told Sasuke the truth anyway...wouldn't it ruin their friendship? I already told Haku that we were not going to be doing any more of the hanky-panky business, but I had a feeling I was talking to someone who had only listened in one ear while it flew out the other. My stupid and irrational decision to kiss him first had opened up this new side of the guy; a side that was determined to get what he wanted no matter what.

(all my fucking fault I guess)

I mean, I really liked Haku and all, but if my blunder was going to make him become clingy...how was I going to let him down easy without hurting him even further?

* * *

><p>And now, with Sasuke's 'odd' behavior last night, the pieces of the puzzle were finally falling into place. Haku, for all his begging for me not to squeal, must have yapped about it in the end! Now Sasuke was pissed at me, and who knows how he and Haku were getting along now?<p>

Fuck it all to hell and back. You know what? Maybe it _is_ a good thing we're 'broken-up', because if being with guys was going to be just as complicated as being with girls, then I wanted out.

Why the hell couldn't sex...or at least foreplay come without the extra baggage? I wasn't looking for a new Sakura in my life, and I most definitely wasn't looking for a _guy_ to fill that void. Though it had taken Sasuke's words to snap me out of my Sakura 'funk', I had come to realize that relationship had sucked me dry emotionally and mentally. It might have been two years since her passing, but I had spent all that time obsessing over her, over what might or might not have been, and living in a world of denial that was more than draining. I was simply not ready to throw myself back into some kind of committed relationship with anyone at this point in my life. I needed to _breathe_, and yet with what has transpired in the past few days, I was back to feeling claustrophobic and overwhelmed.

"What is the matter with you now, Naroot? You look angry about something."

"I'm cool," I muttered as I slipped the final cartridge in its slot. "Ready whenever you are."

"Hmph," he snorted, not looking too convinced, but all the same he barked a curt "Into your position!" which was promptly obeyed.

I settled in and pressed my cheek against the cheek piece while with an eye closed, the other peered through the telescopic sight. I adjusted the settings to where I was now able to view a possible target over a thousand meters away through the cross hairs. So far, I have come to learn that there was an 'art' in even the mundane action of keeping still. He was yet to tell me what to shoot, but my body was automatically falling into a state of tension yet weightlessness. It's hard to explain unless you're actually doing it, but imagine yourself with your eyes closed in a dark room and yet being able to see everything so damn clearly. I hadn't gotten to the stage where all sound around me would fade into silence, and all I would hear would be the steady _ba-dump, ba-dump, ba-dump_ of my heartbeat. And just in the second before you pull the trigger, I swear you find yourself getting a fucking erection and your heart literally stops beating.

Pretty amazing (and somehow disturbing) when you think about it.

"Position, three o'clock," Sergei commanded. "Target office building top floor. Your aim...coffee cup on desk."

I swiveled the telescopic sight as per his directions; the cross hairs now focused on a building that was definitely _not_ empty. In fact, it was one that belonged to some telecommunications company, and I could see the early birds dragging themselves into their cubicles; some stopping to talk to fellow workers and others already plugging away with their duties. Sergei's target for me was a stout man with glasses currently reading a newspaper; his cubicle right next to the large windows that were luckily open. The coffee cup was a mere inch or so away from his hand and every now and then, it would be blocked by the newspaper he was reading when he turned a page. Bottom line, if I was to get the cup, I was to aim and shoot at the exact moment he flipped the page. There would be no room for error with this one, otherwise...

(not ready...not ready for this)

"You...you're joking right?" I asked and immediately felt a sharp pain sear up my side as he kicked at my left ribs. _Goddamnit!_

"Joking?" he brayed. "Do you see me smiling, Naroot?"

"The guy is drinking his fucking coffee!" I yelled back in disbelief. "What if I miss?"

A cold, cruel smile came to that pale face. "If you miss...then he dies, no?"

"You son-of-a-bitch! I'm not...URGH!"

It all happened in a flash. One minute, I was on the ground, the next I was hurled off my feet by the scruff of my shirt and slammed hard against the brick wall; so hard a few loose wooden rafters, from the roof, clattered to the ground in a cloud of sawdust. I felt the world go dark for a second before a bone crushing blow to my right cheek sent me tumbling to the ground with a knee-crunching _thud_ and blood filling my mouth.

_Fuck! I'm going to die! This guy...he's going to kill me!_

"Stand up!" he bellowed, and would have kicked me again, but I managed to roll away from the incoming attack; my entire body burning with agony. I could barely breathe.

"You want to become an assassin like your father, you say," Sergei was growling as he approached me with steady strides; his combat boots sounding like thunder with every step he took. I staggered to my knees and tried to steady myself. "You want to become a killer, and yet you think it is only killing birds and shooting immovable targets that makes you one? You frustrate me, Naroot! You really do!"

He dove for me again, but I ducked and backed away, hitting the wall with a low wince of pain while nursing my aching side and checking for any loose tooth. I spat out the blood and glared at him. He still had that cold smile that didn't quite reach his eyes; eyes that were now filled with the intent to murder. Frantic, I darted my panicked gaze around for some kind of weapon to protect myself with. The rifle was too far from reach, and the closest thing was a piece of the fallen plywood, which looked way too cumbersome to lift anyway.

"You would not last a day in our Russian training camp," he sneered and taunted. "You do not have what it takes to become a true assassin. This!" He pounded his chest. "Your heart...must be made of steel! It cannot waver and if you feel you cannot control it, you cut it out and stomp all over it! A trained killer should have no heart!"

He swung for me again, but this time I was ready for him.

_No heart? No heart? If my father had no heart, would Itachi be alive today? Huh? If he had no heart, would he have fallen in love with my mother and chosen to live the rest of his life as a fugitive? _

I dove for his legs and wrapped my arms around them, sending him toppling back to the ground with a loud cry of surprise. I suffered the blow delivered to my head – which ended up creating a pretty deep cut to my forehead and nearly blinding me with the blood that spurted out immediately – but I wouldn't let him go. He writhed and tried to throw me off; while hurling insults in his native tongue. I felt (or sensed) him about to reach for his gun, and with a growl of frustration and fury, I tugged the knife that was usually attached to his waist, unsheathed it quickly and plunged it deep into his right side. His howl of pain would have been enough for me, but the brute was still alert enough to shove me away with another blow – this time to my stomach - that just about had me vomiting and almost passing out.

_Can't...move..._

I was flat on my back, my breathing harsh and nearly stifled as even my damn throat and lungs felt it was clogged with congealing blood and phlegm. I could barely see now, couldn't even lift my arm because my side and stomach hurt so damn much. I could hear him scrambling to his feet, still cursing out loud, and I closed my eyes in weary resignation. He was going to trample all over me until he had proven his point. This fight had been brewing for days between us, and we had finally come to a head. He was right after all. I _was_ weak, and I could never have the guts or heartlessness required to become a hired gun. Danzo would eat me alive even before I stepped onto the shores of Japan, and all of this...everything my father (and mother) struggled for, would have been for naught.

God, I'm so pathetic.

As if my shame wasn't bad enough, the tears came before I could hold them in. Horrible, loud, embarrassing sobs wretched from my throat as the salt of my tears mingled with my blood. Hard and fast, I felt as if they would never stop. I had no idea why it hurt this much, or why I really didn't give a shit if Sergei used this against me from now until my dying day. It wasn't so much that I was crying from getting beat up, or that I was likely to never make it back to Japan and convince Danzo that I was legit, or that Jiraiya would be disappointed in me, or that my parents' deaths would have been in vain – for some dumb ass reason, I could only see _their_ faces; faces I had slowly but surely come to care about. My new family. From Asuma – who had done so much for me only to have his life cut short, Itachi and Shisui – who were still fighting despite the odds against them, Shikamaru and Temari – who had gone through hell as a couple and were determined to fight the best way they knew how, Karin, who 'fought' by healing, Haku, whose devotion and love to everyone (including me for reasons I still don't understand) made him stronger in mind and spirit, to that annoying, self-righteous, irritating, heartless know-it-all, who had – in the space of two months – made me question every damn thing about him and myself.

My failure here would disappoint them all. If I gave up and went home sobbing with my tail between my legs, I would have put a halt to our dreams of creating a world where evil bastards like Snake Dude, Ikegami, and Danzo no longer existed. It was a lofty goal, but it was _our_ goal goddamnit. It was why we lived and struggled each and every single fucking day, and I knew that my success would determine Sasuke's in the long run.

He needed me, and not just with what I could give him with physical gratification (or vice versa), but with what Danzo's death would mean to Snake Dude. For his sake...for _all_ their sakes (including those we loved and lost), I couldn't quit. _I just couldn't!_

"Sometimes it is good to cry," came the low and unexpected statement that almost had me wondering if I had entered an alternate universe. This was Sergei being..._normal_. No barking. No shouting. No bellowing. No braying. His tone was quiet and contemplative, and I stopped bawling long enough to hear the low sounds of him probably working on his injury. I did mention that that giant bag of his was like an all purpose kit, didn't I? For not only did it keep all the weapons but also our meals and whatever else he could fit in there. Apparently a First Aid kit was a part of it. Had he anticipated such injuries occurring to us in the long run?

"God knows I was like you when I first started this...all crying and feeling sorry for myself." He snorted and flung something my way. I flinched and wondered if he was going to hurt me again, but I noticed it was only the kit itself, which was in a medium-sized black leather bag. It was clear he had no plans to help me clean up, so I'd have to fix up myself as best I could.

With an effort, I managed to sit up, but just long enough to lean back against the wall to catch my breath. I wiped the tears, blood and snot from my face, unable to look at him as I opened the bag and began to remove what I felt I'd need.

"Nobody said it was going to be easy to become a killer, Naroot," Sergei continued. He was rummaging through his bag again, and the familiar sound of the cellophane - usually wrapped around his cold-cut sandwiches - was the most beautiful thing I had ever heard. He flung that to me as well as a small bottle of water. Breakfast. Dawn was finally breaking over the horizon and though I would have loved to admire Nature's brush strokes of wondrous colors, I was too busy trying to stop the bleeding so I could eat. I hadn't realized how hungry I was all this time, and here I am like a goddamn leaking faucet.

"But everything I said, I meant." Sergei tore open his package to begin eating, which was amazing in itself to watch. He could finish a sandwich in just two bites. Military training I guess. I dared to steal a glance at him then, noticing he had taken off his sweat and blood-stained tank top to apply a wad of bandages to his stab wound. He'd probably still have to go to a hospital to have it checked out since there were was a growing blossom of red on the white cloth. At least it was a good thing he didn't look like he was dying anytime soon. I might have hated the guy and wanted to protect myself, but killing him hadn't been my intention.

"I look at you and I see so much potential," he continued in that gruff accented voice of his. "I see the desperation in your eyes and the monster lurking behind it. You are, what we call in this business, a _samorodok_ – a natural – and there are many men who would give an arm or two arms to be able to do what you did in just three days."

(the monster lurking...)

"I had my first kill when I was only six years old," he grunted. His gaze was trained on the sunrise; the light bathing his profile to give him the appearance of a chiseled Greco-Roman statue. There was no spare ounce of flesh on this guy. Every muscle well defined like something actually carved from rock. "Sliced the neck of the man who was going to rape me. Hah!"

I blinked. Did he just say 'rape'?

"Six?" I asked incredulously. I wished I had a mirror so I could see if I was doing a good job applying the band aid to my forehead wound. By this time, there was a pile of blood-soaked tissues next to me. Not a particularly pleasant sight.

"Oh yes." That familiar bitter smile came to his visage. "I grew up in a camp reserved for those believed to be traitors to the government. Like a concentration camp you might say. My father was a spy, and my mother was gunned down by military forces because of her allegiance to the opposition. So as you can see, my family was a target from the beginning. I was not liked very much, and everyone was out for me and my _sem´â_ at any opportunity they got. I had to use these..." He held up his large hands; hands with faded tattoos and knuckles that looked like they had seen their fair share of fights over the years. Those hands had stories to tell, and I was hearing one now. "To defend oneself, one must learn to fight to survive, and you know this well already. You survived that place called Byaku-Shinkyou, did you not?"

"Barely," I muttered and spat out again. More blood, which told me that I probably had a cut inside my mouth. Good grief. I opened my bottle of water and gurgled my aching mouth with some of it. Knowing Sergei, this bottle was probably all I was going to get for the rest of the day, so I might as well manage it effectively.

"But you survived and that is what is important. You did not want to die. You did not want to end your life there, and that is the instinct in all of us. When we find ourselves faced with the most dangerous of obstacles, we find a way to rise above it. That," He pointed to the sitting sniper rifle. "Is an obstacle that you must overcome, Naroot. It is all well and good to shoot at paper people and animals that do not threaten, but when you are faced with a life and death situation..."

"...you pull the trigger," I finished quietly.

"And that is all there is to it," Sergei agreed with a loud grunt. "This is why it is a heartless job, Naroot. If you become too attached to every assignment, you will never survive in this business. They tell me that you want to work for Shimura Danzo, eh? I have dealt with the man before – not on a face-to-face basis – but I can assure you, he will pick at whatever holes you reveal. He can spot one's weakness and exploit it to his benefit. So you must give him absolutely nothing to work with. You must become like an impenetrable fortress in his presence. Do you understand?"

I looked into the steely blue eyes before me and felt the all-consuming weight of what he was saying finally sinking in. Danzo was no doubt going to give assignments to test my loyalty to him. It would be more than simply shooting at a coffee mug and being afraid to miss. It would require actually taking the _life_ of another human being even if I didn't know a damn thing about them. I would have to become a vessel for his dirty work. It was what my father had to do for years until his 'heart' finally thawed at the sight of Uchiha Fugaku and his family. Would I ever be able to freeze this fickle heart of mine? Would I ever manage to convince them that I could be as cold and ruthless as my father must have been?

I glanced at the rifle and bit my lower lip.

(to become heartless)

In that instant, I saw his face; those 'pretty' features that could look flushed with the aftermath of intimacy or grow cold and distant as he shut me away.

(just like Sakura...eventually they all get tired of me...)

I tightened my fingers around the bottle of water and forced myself to breathe evenly.

It might take me a while to develop that damn heart of ice, but at least...for now if nothing else, I would keep up with this training and keep to my end of the bargain. I was not about to let _him_ down, no matter how much of an asshole he could be.

"All right, Sergei," I finally said quietly as I began to unwrap my sandwich. "As soon as I'm done with breakfast...how about we try this one more time?"

* * *

><p><em>Haku:<em>

It was worse than he thought.

The past two days have been the longest of his life, filled with changes he had not anticipated after his honest and bold declaration to Sasuke. He had anticipated that things would indeed change between them, but not to this extent.

The first sign of such change came the very next morning when Haku awakened at his usual time to find the futon beside him empty. In fact, there was no futon there at all. Sasuke had not only woken up before him, he had rolled up the bedding and put it in its place without waiting for Haku to do his usual task. As if that wasn't bad enough, Sasuke hadn't waited for him to take a bath, or requested Haku join him, and for breakfast, his master – who had never really enjoyed the western meal – had chosen to eat nothing but toast and a cup of hot chocolate. To make things more aggravating, Sasuke did all this without acting insolent or stand-offish. He had greeted Haku as he usually did, and kept up with the small talk albeit strained in some parts, but it was a clear message being sent out to Haku.

The master and servant relationship was no longer in effect.

He was officially free to do as he pleased and was no longer under any obligation to administer to Sasuke hand and foot as he used to.

It was a rather strange and difficult position to be in, for Haku had known nothing else but serving others for so long. His servitude had so been ingrained in his psyche that the old habits of kneeling at the door the moment Sasuke walked into the apartment, or taking off his slippers, or setting up his reading area, or even making his afternoon tea...none of that mattered anymore. Sasuke would gently refuse and insist that the younger man no longer kneel or bow to him as he used to.

"You are your own person now, Haku," he would say. "So I want you to stop trying so hard to please me, all right? I'll manage on my own. You shouldn't worry."

But Haku _did_ worry, and he hated himself for worrying.

_What good am I now to anyone? _

He would have liked to talk to Karin, but it seemed like Sasuke now favored her company; something even Karin herself was confused (but obviously pleased) about. Seeing Sasuke blatantly ask her to join him at the gym or not cringe when she came to their apartment, was yet another sign that he was indeed giving Haku the freedom he needed to pursue his feelings for Naruto.

Unfortunately, the Naruto he would have loved to speak to was still as elusive. In fact, Haku was sure the blond had not returned from his training last night. He would have loved nothing more to go there with a basket of food to watch and cheer him on, but his gentle prodding of Jae Weong had revealed nothing. Naruto and Sergei's training ground was some big secret that could never be revealed no matter what. It was all down right frustrating.

He sighed and crossed the street; his destination the park where he could be alone and think of how to move on as best he could from here on out. He idly wondered if his new friend would show up today, for they had met twice since their initial encounter. Their conversations hadn't been long, mostly thanks to Karin's impatience, but at least Haku had come to know that the stranger's name was 'Sai' and that he had no connection to Shin-chan though it was amusing that Haku would mistake him for a childhood friend. So how had he known Haku's name then? Sai had confessed that he had overheard Karin calling him that on a previous visit to the store, which would mean that Sai had known about Haku for quite a while.

"I just never had the nerve to speak to you," Sai confessed with a such a cute expression on his visage, Haku hadn't the heart to disbelieve his story. "You don't mind me calling you that, do you? I prefer it to Chung-hee."

"Just as long as you don't say it aloud," Haku had insisted; lying that 'Haku' was his middle name thanks to his Japanese mother, while his Korean father had insisted he be called Chung-hee.

Sai didn't question that story, neither did he really seem to care about whatever history Haku conjured up for himself. Haku had the feeling he could claim he was the prince of an obscure country and Sai would believe him wholeheartedly. He almost felt bad lying to the sweet young man, but this was something that had to be done to protect himself.

Today, however, he felt ready to burst at the seams. He needed to talk to someone..._anyone_ who was willing to listen to him. He held no expectations that Sai would be here today, and was more than pleasantly surprised to find the dark-haired man in his usual position, but with something new on hand. A sketchpad and pencil. Haku froze.

"You...you draw too..."

Sai looked up with widened eyes; his pale visage suffusing with color at the sight of the beautiful man before him. He gave a weak laugh and tried to hide what he was doing. "I'm still learning," he confessed. "It's been a while since I've actually drawn anything so..."

Haku continued to watch him in thoughtful silence. Sai had claimed he wasn't Shin, and yet he looked like him and apparently had the same talent. His story was that he was actually a half-breed; Japanese mother and Korean father, and he had traveled from country to country with his family over the years, so he really couldn't call any one place home.

"I take it you don't believe me," Sai said quietly; his gaze downcast and miserable. He held up the sketchpad. "Here, you can see for yourself if I'm as good as Shin was. It's just that the other day you spoke about him, you made me want to pick it up for myself and try it. You'll see that compared to your childhood friend, I am nothing more than a novice."

Haku accepted the offered book and thumbed through it slowly. Sai was right. His stuff was amateur to say the least. Compared to Shin's finer strokes and more attention to detail, Sai's attempts seemed weak and half-hearted. It was almost as if he was trying too hard and making a mockery of whatever subject he was focused on.

"What's this supposed to be?" Haku asked as he sat on the bench beside Sai and held up the sketch book to what looked like a picture of a deformed chicken.

Sai turned crimson and snatched the book from Haku. "It's supposed to be a flower," he mumbled beneath his breath. Haku sputtered...then gave up and giggled helplessly with a hand covering his mouth.

"Don't laugh," Sai whined in misery, while clutching the book tightly to his chest. "I knew you'd find it funny."

"You are definitely not Shin," Haku chuckled with a shake of his head. "He would never have drawn something that ridiculous. But, you're trying and that's what's important, isn't it?"

Sai didn't look too convinced, and it wasn't until Haku begged for forgiveness in the most adorable way, did he finally cave in reluctantly. "Next time, I'm going to be even better," he vowed.

Haku clapped his hands in delight and grinned. "And I'll be cheering you on all the way!"

Sai smiled softly. "At least I'm glad I made you laugh again. You were looking quite despondent on your way here. Is everything all right?"

Haku sighed and sat back on the bench. Great. He just had to be reminded of his woes, didn't he? He tucked his hands within the sleeves of the kimono (it was getting a little chilly), and absently stared at the children playing by the pond with their plastic boats, while their mother read a book several feet away from them.

"You can tell me it's none of my business," Sai said quietly. "I'll understand."

"It is none of your business," Haku agreed; failing to notice the pained expression that came to his companion's face. "But...I guess I brought it upon myself, and now I have to face the consequences."

Sai fell silent, though his sharp gaze was trained on the serene profile beside him. How he longed to capture Haku's essence on paper again, but it was too risky at this time.

"My love for one person has ruined my relationship with another," Haku admitted in a barely audible whisper. He could feel his throat tighten as memories of Sasuke's detachment came rushing back in a flood. Who knew he would miss having to serve that man?

"How so?" came the gentle prod.

Haku bit his lower lip and shook his head lightly. "I don't want to bore you with this..."

"Trust me, you are not boring me at all," Sai insisted with a firm nod. "I love listening to you talk, and if I can offer any assistance, I'll be glad to."

"Can you make everything the way it once was?" came the quiet question as sad brown eyes met concerned obsidian in silent query. "Can you take me back to a time when I felt I was needed by someone? Now...I feel so damn useless. I want to become my own person, to do things the way I want without having to seek permission all the time, and yet...yet...all I can think about is going _back_ to him."

He scrubbed at his eyes in humiliated anger; knowing how shameful it was to be in tears before someone he barely knew. It would take him almost a minute to realize that Sai was holding onto his hand tenderly, a tremulous smile on that pale visage as if trying to hold back his tears as well.

"It must be hard for you," Sai sympathized.

"Don't act like you understand," Haku sulked and sniffled miserably. "You wouldn't understand what I'm going through."

Sai's smile, this time, seemed bittersweet. "You'd be surprised at how many people can relate to your pain, Haku. You're not the only one who has felt unwanted before."

Haku looked into those inky black depths...

(oh how they reminded him of Sasuke's)

...and slid his hand away from Sai's grip slowly. He took a deep breath to control his emotions. "I should stop feeling sorry for myself, shouldn't I?" He threw a weak smile to Sai. "I'm sorry. It's just been a very strenuous time for me."

"There's no need to apologize." There was a brief pause in which unspoken questions hung between them like a cloud before Sai cleared his throat. "So...eh...who is this lucky person that's a recipient of your feelings?"

Haku gave a snort and rolled his eyes. "He could be on another planet now for all the attention he gives me."

"He doesn't know?"

"Oh, I think he has an idea...but I don't think he can love me the way I love him." It would eventually dawn on Haku that his declaration of falling for a 'he' hadn't caused Sai to blink or shrink away in disgust.

"I see," Sai muttered. "This is indeed a quandary."

"Exactly."

"Have you told him? Actually told him how you feel? Maybe he'll respond to you then. You never know."

Haku groaned and closed his eyes. "If it was that easy, I'd do it, but you have to remember...all this stems from me wanting something someone else wants but doesn't know he wants yet."

"Huh?"

Haku lifted his lashes and gave a wry smile. "My master loves this same person as well, but he doesn't realize it yet. I, on the other hand, do realize my feelings, but the person we both want is oblivious to all of this and couldn't really care less about reciprocating those feelings anyway. Now, do you understand why this is all very complicated?"

Sai whistled beneath his breath. "Wow."

"Yes. Even the best Korean drama couldn't produce this script."

"So what are you going to do?"

"...I really don't know, Sai. I'd love to speak to the one I love, but he's not been home in a while because of his training."

"...training?"

Haku nodded. "He's going through some intense training...nothing important you should know about, but I haven't seen him in a while and getting to talk to him is next to impossible. My master no longer seems to need me and has now gravitated toward the other female living with us, and I know for a fact that he doesn't really like her in _that way_, so why bother leading her on like that?" He gave a low sound of exasperation. "He can be such a stubborn bonehead."

Sai chuckled. "But shouldn't you be happy that he's no longer vying for your true love's affections? This is your opportunity to strike, isn't it?"

"And yet I derive no joy from it even if I conquer him. I'll always know – at the back of my mind – that I somehow betrayed my master. Ex-master that is." Haku seemed to sink lower on the bench, his expression one of acute pain. "But why should I give up what I desire just to make him happy...again? I gave up my relationship with Za...someone I loved once before just because my master disapproved and now I have to repeat that cycle all over again? Why? Am I a bad person for wanting to be happy?"

"There is no crime in being happy, Haku," Sai encouraged softly. "Maybe what should happen is all three of you sit down and...talk this whole thing out. Don't you think that would be a good idea?"

"And just what are we going to talk about?"

"How you all feel about each other, of course."

Haku snickered. "You don't know my ex-master, do you? He's not the kind of person that will come out and state how he feels for any other person so openly. For years, all he has done is suppress his emotions and now that he's free to express them, it's leaving him sometimes baffled and helpless."

"You seem to know your master quite well."

"I've lived with him most of my life, so I should." Haku sighed heavily. "In a way, that is why this is even more difficult. You see, once upon a time, I would have been thrilled to death that my master and my love would even _speak_ to each other. I did my best to bring them together, not knowing just how much it would bother me if things did progress to the stage beyond mere friendship. My master has been sheltered for so long that I felt the one I love would be the catalyst to him becoming more open and willing to accept changes. Well...I got my wish and now my selfish side wants to take it all back."

"You can't have your cake and eat it too, Haku."

"Don't you think I know that already?" came the sullen complaint. "You don't have to remind me of my selfishness."

"All right...here's the deal." Sai sat up to place his hands firmly on Haku's shoulders, forcing the long-haired man to face him squarely. "Since you can't get the three of you to have a talk, how about confessing to your love, seeing what he says and going from there? If he says "no", then you know you've tried and given it your all and then _you _do _your_ best to move on. However, if he says "yes", then you and your ex-master are just going to have to come to an agreement that your happiness should be paramount. He will have to be the one to learn to move on and who knows? Maybe this girl he's with will turn out to be the one for him in the end. Stranger things have happened, right?"

"...I guess..."

"You really shouldn't over think this, Haku," Sai said with a smile. "I mean if your master really hated you, he'd have kicked you out of the apartment by now, right? But he's simply giving you the room and chance to find out how to live without being his shadow all the time. Of course it's going to be difficult, especially after years of being in his service, and no one expects you to be jumping for joy so soon. He probably did this because he loves and respects you too much to belittle how much you need to grow and become who you wish to be. Talk to him as you usually did, only the next time you find yourself about to put away his slippers, you slap your wrist gently and remind yourself of who you are trying to become, eh?"

"How come you make it sound so easy?"

"Because it is that easy...at least from an outsider's perspective," Sai admitted with a chuckle. "And besides, I'll be here for you if you ever need to get anything off your chest. Maybe we shouldn't meet all the time in the park though. There are some other great places we can hang out."

"...are you asking me out?" Haku asked with a raised brow, causing Sai's cheeks to turn a pretty shade of pink.

"Of course not," he stuttered with a shake of his head. "It's just...I thought you'd like to see a different setting. Like a restaurant or maybe we could go to the zoo. And besides, I'll be no competition for the one you love, so I'm not even going to try wooing you any longer. I'm more than content being just friends with you...if you'll let me."

Why this plain and honest declaration made Haku's throat tighten with emotion, he could not tell you. He simply lowered his head and nodded slowly, absently accepting the quick and almost awkward hug Sai gave him.

When they broke apart, they gave each other shy smiles before Haku reached out for the sketch book to thumb through the pages again.

"You're not going to laugh at me again, are you?" Sai began to protest.

Haku smiled softly and shook his head. "No...not laugh at you, but _with_ you." He looked into the dark eyes that now held an expression he could not define. "And you're right...the next time we meet...let's go to a place where we really have fun, okay?"

Sai didn't trust himself to speak for a moment, before he finally found the willpower to nod shyly in agreement.

"Okay, Haku. I would like that so very much."

* * *

><p><em>Shikamaru:<em>

He shuffled out of the apartment with the garbage bags; his intention to take them downstairs to the incinerator behind the building. However, just as he shut the door behind him – and purely done out of habit – he glanced towards Naruto's apartment not really expecting to see anything different. For the past two days, it had remained silent and empty, for Shikamaru was sure the blond had not returned even to take a bath. However, at the sight of the blade of light beneath the door and the undeniable sound of a now familiar commercial being played in the background, his heart leapt in relief. Naruto was finally back home!

_For how long though?_ Shikamaru thought warily, though he as glad to know his friend was alive and well. He wouldn't lie and say he hadn't been worried with the intense schedule Sergei had put his friend through so far. The one time he had managed to see Naruto earlier in the week, the blond had looked like a shadow of his former self. Inner decision made, he dropped the garbage bags beside the janitor's closet and made his way to Naruto's apartment; knocking only once before letting himself in.

"Hey, stranger," he began in salutation, only to find the words lodged in his throat at the sight of the comatose body splayed out on the floor. Panic and fear rose within Shikamaru's mind at the notion that Sergei had literally worked his friend to death, for Naruto hadn't even bothered changing out of his clothes which were dirty, torn, and blood-streaked in several places.

_What the hell happened to you!_

"Naruto? Naruto," he called out tentatively as he fell to his knees and gingerly turned the body over. "Fuck!"

It was worse than he thought. Naruto was clearly passed out, but it was the cuts and bruises all over him that told of a training that must have been nothing short of brutal. He was still bleeding in some places and had stained the _tatami_ mats with his blood and sweat. Having seen enough, Shikamaru set to work. He would have loved to go out to call Karin or even Haku for help, but he knew they had all stepped out to run different errands. He could call on Sasuke, but according to Temari, he had actually gone out with Karin. So no luck there. Besides, he was still trying to get over what had happened the other day with Sasuke apologizing to them in such a manner. Talk about being surprised. The Sasuke they had once known would have never done something like that.

_Guess we all have to grow up every once in a while._

He barely heard the knock on the door behind him, but did hear the tentative sound of his fiancée's voice. "Naruto? Are you back...?" Her gasp was enough to tell him that she had seen the damage. "Oh my God," she whispered in shock as she fell to her knees beside him. "What's wrong with him?"

"Sergei's wrong, that's what," Shikamaru grunted as he began tugging Naruto's pants down his legs. "Can you get me a basin of warm water and a wash cloth?"

Temari nodded immediately, also adding she'd get some medicine from their apartment to assist. In about half an hour, they had both managed to clean him up and attend to his wounds as best as they could. They did not have Karin's magic touch, but this would have to do for now until she returned. While Shikamaru tucked Naruto within his futon, Temari was in the kitchen trying to whip up something edible. Naruto's fridge was just about empty with nothing more than several bottles of water, two cans of beer, a bag of oranges that was almost rotten (she tossed that in the trash), and a loaf of bread close to its expiration date. His cupboards only yielded about ten packets of instant ramen and a box of rice crackers; hardly what one could consider healthy eating. No wonder he sometimes mooched off them for dinner.

"Ah, I think he's waking up," Shikamaru observed as Naruto's features began to contort...well more like his nose sniffing the air. "I think he smells your cooking."

Temari snickered. "Guess that would wake anyone up from the depths of a coma."

Lashes flew open to reveal bright blue eyes that seemed glazed at first before a few blinks had them focused again.

"Naruto?" Shikamaru asked as he leaned over the prone figure. "You alive, buddy? How many fingers am I holding up?"

"...get your fucking fingers off my face, man," came the hoarse reply that brought a smile to Shikamaru's face.

"Yep. He's back and as annoying as ever." He sat back as Naruto struggled to sit up, only to notice the blond wincing and holding onto his left side. There was a fading bruise there, a clear sign Naruto had probably suffered several broken bones, but since Karin wasn't around to apply her brand of first aid, their little band-aids and ointments would have to suffice for now.

"How are you feeling, Naruto?" Temari asked as she walked back into the room with a tray of food consisting of a steaming bowl of tempura _udon_, pieces of grilled fish, and two rice balls.

"Starving," Naruto confessed with his stomach giving a loud growl as if to agree with his statement. He blushed as the couple chuckled, reaching for the meal and bowing his head in sincere thanks to them for their help.

"_Itadakimasu!_"

They watched him all but shovel the meal – you'd think he hadn't eaten in days – into his mouth with gusto; neither bothering him with the million and one questions swirling in their minds. He asked for seconds and Temari was happy to oblige. By the time he was through – with a loud belch for added measure – Naruto felt more like himself.

"Man, I needed that," he sighed in satisfaction. Temari was in the kitchen washing up now, and both men lounged lazily in the living room, absently watching the drama show on the television. "Talk about revitalization."

"All right...I'm curious and dying to know," Shikamaru asked curtly. "Just what the hell are you two doing? I thought he was only supposed to teach you how to shoot a damn gun! What's with all the cuts and bruises...and your feet! Did he make you walk on glass or something?"

Naruto wriggled his toes and chuckled weakly. "That's what running for five miles a day will do to you, I guess."

"You run that far? Why?" Temari asked this as she settled beside Shikamaru to peer at the blond with curiosity.

"Because he's a sadistic prick," Naruto replied with a shrug. "He makes me run all the way to our training place while he drives and says I have to keep up. Then he makes me do no less than a hundred push ups and that's before we begin the painful task of memorizing each and every damn gun the bastard's got in his collection."

Shikamaru whistled in appreciation, while Temari looked flummoxed and a little confused.

"I have to learn which bullets or cartridges go into which, know how to disassemble, then clean, then reassemble each and everyone." He lifted his hands; hands that now looked raw, calloused and hardened with all he had done over the past week. He flexed his fingers and seemed to regard them intently. "I can aim and shoot at a target over 3,000 meters now. Can you believe it?"

"That's impressive," Shikamaru agreed. "Still doesn't explain how you got all the other bruises and wounds though."

Naruto gave a light smirk. "Let's just say we didn't exactly see eye-to-eye on some things."

"...you guys had a fight?"

"Something like that." He noticed the expression on his friends' faces and shook his head. "It's nothing to be worried about. We both left an impression on each other, all for the better actually. We needed to get that fight out of the way to better understand each other."

"Ah..."

"But hey, besides that he made me shoot at the most ridiculous targets. Heh, I'm surprised I haven't made the news yet."

"Why's that?"

Naruto gave a wan smile. "He made me shoot through office buildings; targeting different items within them. It took me a while to get my first 'kill', which was a coffee cup, but when that baby shattered, you should have seen the panic in that place." He gave a dry chuckle and shook his head. "They were probably wondering if they were suddenly being attacked by terrorists or something."

"Did you shatter the windows too?"

"Not at first," Naruto admitted. "They were already open when I began aiming, but after five attempts, I think they got the message and closed up everything. So Sergei just chose another office building for me to damage."

"And you didn't hurt anyone?"

Naruto grimaced. "On accident..."

"You _killed_ someone?" Temari asked incredulously.

The blond ran his fingers through his hair in frustration; his features looked like he was in pain. "I don't know for sure. I just saw the guy go down and everyone started gathering around him. I wasn't even aiming at him. Sergei reassured me the guy was all right, but I didn't believe him. I was in...like frozen in shock."

"But the reality is that you are eventually going to have to really take out another human being for real, right?" Temari queried in a quiet voice.

"Don't remind me," came the groaned reply as Naruto raised his knees to his chest and buried his face against them. "Every fucking minute I shoot at something, I am more than aware of what waits for me when I get back to Japan."

Shikamaru cleared his throat. He shared a quick look with his mate and love-of-his-life, smiled weakly at the gentle squeeze of his hand she gave him, before taking a deep breath.

"Naruto," he began quietly but firmly. "Temari and I have given this a lot of thought, and I know you've suggested many times over that we should both run off and try to find happiness away from all of this, but...we can't."

Naruto lifted his head to give them a look that was a combination of confusion and wariness. "Huh?"

Shikamaru smiled wryly. "If we were to run off today, we'd be running away from everything we have sacrificed so far. Running away would mean giving up on what Asuma fought for."

Naruto shook his head. "What's the point? I mean...why bother? I don't get it. If I were you, I'd go as far away from here as possible. Why would I want to be involved with shit like this?"

"Because we _are_ involved, Naruto," Temari replied. "It's because of the Bakufu Syndicate that Shikamaru got arrested in the first place over a crime he didn't even commit. Why don't you tell him why you _really_ got arrested, babe?"

Shikamaru rubbed his chin gently in thought. "Remember what I told you about how I got caught?"

"You were drinking with some buddies and on a dare you were to sneak into the house of a Bakufu Syndicate, right?" Naruto answered, which received a nod from his friend.

"But that's just a part of it. The reason why they really wanted me put away was because I was an understudy for a certain Councilman at the time. In fact, this guy was supposed to be appointed to the DIET, but his stance was quite unpopular with a certain group of individuals."

"The _yakuza_," Naruto deduced quickly.

Shikamaru nodded. "Right. The Councilman would give speeches and deliver flyers about his message, going as far as national T.V. to speak against the evils of the Syndicate. For weeks, we were threatened by those guys. We couldn't get into our local offices because they'd be there, parked and waiting with their guns and knives, ready to attack if we dared showed our faces there. We had to resort to underground hideouts to continue with our message knowing how dire our situation was. But despite our best efforts, they won out in the end."

His hands formed tight fists on his lap as the memory came rushing back. He bit his lower lip so hard, he barely felt the trickle of blood that dribbled down his chin. "I was lucky that day; lucky that I had decided to leave town with Temari for a much needed break. On my return, I learned that the Councilman had been assassinated while visiting a temple with his wife and young daughter. Gunned down in cold blood like fucking animals, Naruto. As if that wasn't bad enough, the bastards had discovered our base and destroyed it including anyone who was in it at the time. I was in a rage that night, so furious and upset over what happened I resorted to getting myself stinking drunk while swearing to take down any _yakuza_ I came across. I should have been among the dead, so why the fuck was I still alive? No one dared me, that was a lie I came up with at the police station later, but I did try to gain access to one of the Syndicate member's home...stupidly I might add. Trying to climb a secure fence while as drunk as a skunk is never a good idea. I was captured before I could even get a step over the vine, tortured and then dumped in the station the next day with an asterix to my name."

"An asterix...?"

Shikamaru's lips curled into a bitter smile. "As in no matter what happened, I would never leave Byaku-Shinkyou until my sentencing was up. Temari did everything in her power to get me out of there. Calling on the Councilmen we knew and those we felt would be able to help us, but no matter what she did, she was turned down or ignored. The final straw came with her supposed "accident". It was just too damn convenient to have her car struck in the middle of an empty highway by a truck going at over 90 fucking miles an hour. They knew she was making a lot of 'noise' and thought of the best way to shut her up. Asuma was the one to choose the hospital she stayed at for fear she'd still be hunted down if they realized she was alive. He risked his neck for both of us...for this...us today to finally happen. So when you tell us to just run away and try to live happily ever after, we can't do it without living the rest of our lives with guilt."

"We consider it payback for what the Bakufu took away from us: the Councilman and his family, my colleagues, and two years of my life I'll never be able to get back. So...if you don't mind, I'd like to follow you to Japan when it's time. I promise not to get in the way of you and Danzo unless you request it. I'm more than content remaining the shadows and being your sounding board, but yeah...if you are willing to take on an extra traveling companion, I'm up for it."

Naruto's eyes widened in shock at this. He opened his mouth to protest, though he was embarrassed to find he was getting choked up for some inexplicable reason. He had always been of the assumption that this was a journey he'd have to do alone and now...

"Don't try to stop me," Shikamaru insisted with a raised hand as if to still Naruto's words. "It's a decision we've thought long and hard about, and I think it's only fair. After all..." He gave a smile that was tinged with sadness. "Asuma did give me the task of being your bodyguard, Son of Senju. Though it sucks that I'll have to keep watching your fucking back, I can't back away from that promise either." He blushed faintly at the look in the blond's eyes before snorting and looking away. "And what are you crying for anyway? You shouldn't be...hey!"

"I love you, man!" Naruto wailed for he had flung his arms around Shikamaru in a bear hug that nearly sent them toppling to the floor. Ignoring the aches and pains, he planted kisses (that earned many 'eews!' and 'gross, man!') on Shikamaru's face while his woman laughed and teased them for being so emotional.

"Get off me already," Shikamaru grunted and finally managed to hold Naruto at bay; though his features were flushed and his hair and come untangled from its ponytail. He grumbled and searched for the rubber band that had held it up, while Naruto rubbed his face clean with the back of his hand and grinned happily at Temari.

"And you're really okay with letting him go?"

"Well...it's going to be difficult," she confessed with a smile. "But I'll be joining you all soon and fighting in my own way. Itachi says I can join Akatsuki and work within the DIET. I do have experience working for government officials when I'm not too busy at the dojo teaching."

"That is fucking awesome! You have the best woman in the world, Shika. I'm jealous, man."

Shikamaru laughed. "I know you are, which is why I flaunt her often." And as if to make Naruto even more aggravated, he leaned close to plant a firm kiss on his blushing woman's lips. "Oh. Did I forget to mention that we're going to get married soon?"

"Eh?"

"Yes, we are," Temari said with a shy smile. "We found a local temple here with Japanese Shinto priests who can do a quick ceremony. We've held it back for so long, we want to get it done now before the...war begins I guess."

"And I choose you as my best man," Shikamaru insisted with a smirk. It looked like Naruto was about to burst into tears again. Geez. "Save the waterworks, man."

"I'm not crying," Naruto sniffled and rubbed his eyes again. "I'm just so damn happy for you guys, that's all. So when's the wedding?"

"You'll still be here by next Wednesday, right?"

"Hopefully..."

"When's Jiraiya coming?"

"Monday," Naruto muttered as he counted the days mentally. "But just because he's going to be here doesn't mean I get to leave with him on the same day. He's just coming to make sure I'm ready, that's all."

"Ah...but still..." Temari looked at Shikamaru with a worried frown. "Should we push it up just in case?"

"Not for me, you don't," Naruto insisted with a shake of his head. "I'm gonna be here on Wednesday for the celebration. No missing it. That perv's just gonna have to wait."

"All right then, it's settled. Shake on it?"

Both men shook hands and grinned like fools until Temari had to break them up.

"So what else's been happening while I was in Hell?" Naruto asked. "Where's Karin? I thought for sure she'd be in here by now."

"She went out with Sasuke," Temari replied absently, failing to notice the effect this answer had on the blond. She was too busy brushing off imaginary lint from Shikamaru's kimono.

Naruto captured his lower lip between his teeth. "Oh...I see..."

"They've been going out a lot more recently," Shikamaru stated, though unlike his fiancée, his watchful gaze had noticed the dark expression to flitter across Naruto's visage. "Seems like they're quite close too."

"Not that close," Temari said with a laugh. "But yes...he definitely has been seeking her company more often now, and I can tell you even Karin is surprised by this, but as you can imagine, quite happy at the attention."

"Speaking of surprises, he came to see us yesterday."

"Who?"

"Sasuke," Shikamaru explained.

Naruto raised a brow. "Why would he want to see you without a prior appointment set up or something?"

Shikamaru snickered. "We were just as surprised, but you know how he is. He came barging in accusing Temari of being a spy."

Naruto groaned and shook his head. "Oy..."

"Yeah, exactly. He said Itachi had told him that there was a plant sent by Orochimaru to scope us out and we had to be careful, so he falsely assumed it was Temari. Well, we set him straight and thought he'd stomp out all in a hissy fit about being put in his place, but..."

"He apologized to us," Temari finished with a flourish.

Now Naruto's jaw really _did_ drop. Sasuke..._apologize_?

"And not just simply saying it," Temari continued. "He bowed and everything."

Naruto rubbed a hand across his aching forehead, nearly taking off the band-aid his friends had applied earlier. Was this an alternate universe of some sort? Was he back at the abandoned building sleeping beside Sergei in the shivering cold? Yes...that was probably it. This was all a dream. It had to be. Uchiha Sasuke – the proud former first captain of the famous and elite watchdogs – could not possibly have bowed before people he had once considered 'sinners' and beneath him.

"...changed, hasn't he?" Temari was saying. "I mean from all the horror stories Shikamaru told me about him, all I see is a nice guy or at least someone who's trying to be nice and different from the bastard you all keep calling him."

"Hate to admit it, but you have a point there," Shikamaru concurred with a sheepish expression. "I couldn't believe it. The Sasuke we knew back at Byaku-Shinkyou seems to be vanishing, Naruto. This one seems much more ready to take responsibilities for his actions and make changes – at least to the way things are run over there. What do you think?"

_What do I think? What do I think? What the fuck am I supposed to think?_ Naruto thought wildly. In his mind, the image of Sasuke in the throes of passion; of how vulnerable and content he looked after their make-out sessions was crudely juxtaposed with the image of the distant man in the house robe, who had shut him out two nights ago. It was like being forced to confront two different men at the same time; one he was coming to like a whole lot more than he cared to admit, and the other that reminded him of a time he'd much rather forget.

He was spared the agony of answering when the door was suddenly flung open and Karin all but ran in with a cry of his name on her lips. He would only have the time to notice that she looked especially more feminine than usual in a white summer dress that really brought out her red hair and darkish brown eyes to the forefront. She smelled pretty sweet too.

"You're back!" she wailed as she fell to her knees, threw her arms around his neck and just about squeezed the life out of him. "See, Sasuke?" she yelled and turned a little to the silent figure just outside the door. "I told you I heard the noise in here. Oh my gosh! What happened to you, Naruto? You're bruised all over!"

And as she began fretting and fussing over his injuries, questioning bright blue eyes met and held inscrutable dark ones for a heart stopping minute where nothing and no one else seemed to matter. Naruto could hear his heart drumming loud, loud, louder still within his chest. He suddenly had so many things to ask and say, but just as he parted his lips, Sasuke seemed to suck in a harsh breath before tearing his gaze away and turning his back on the scene despite Karin's accusing query.

"Where are you going? Aren't you going to say hi to Naruto?"

All she (they) received was a nonchalant shrug from the other man as he continued to walk away, but not without a tossed, "I'll see you later, Karin," over his shoulder.

"Jerk," Karin muttered with no venom in her tone. She was back ton her feet and announcing she was going to get some more bandages to wrap around his torso and feet. Temari excused herself as well to help, finally leaving Shikamaru alone with Naruto.

The older man towered over the sitting figure and studied the bowed head for a long minute before asking quietly. "You want to tell me what's going on between you two now?"

Naruto, with his head still bowed, shook it gently. "No...I'm cool."

"...you sure?" He would have liked to guess that it was another petty argument between them, but somehow, Shikamaru had the feeling it wasn't that simple this time around. There was something else...something intangible that was beyond a mere fist-a-cuff.

Naruto gave an exasperated sigh. "I'll be all right, man. Don't fret over me."

"All right. All right." Shikamaru held up his hands as if in surrender. "I'm going. Just...you know...if you want to talk...I'm here for you."

The blond did look up now, but only to give a half smile. "Thanks, Shika. I owe you one."

On impulse, he reached out to ruffle the spiky blond locks, smiling as Naruto attempted to bite his hand playfully for doing so. He left the apartment with a gentle click of the door behind him, but not before seeing Naruto's head bowed again and those shoulders sag a little as if suddenly burdened with some unseen load. He felt his heart stir with concern and worry for his friend, but realized that he could do nothing unless Naruto sought out his help. For now...

(he reached for the garbage bags he had discarded earlier)

...he would only watch, observe and finally begin the real task his most precious mentor and friend had assigned to him all those months ago while sitting on that roof on a nippy winter night. If he closed his eyes, he could still smell that sweet nicotine of his cigarette and hear that low sonorous voice with its haunting words of wisdom:

_"The tides are beginning to change, Shikamaru. The rumblings are becoming a little louder, and it will only be a matter of time before we all have to deal with our fates."_


	31. 31: Peeling Layers

**Notes:** My apologies if the chapters are coming out a little faster than usual. The muse seems to be back in full force lately. Again, my sincere thanks to your comments/feedback on the last chapter. It's very, very much appreciated. *bows gratefully* Enjoy, my dearies!

**P.S:** To address a question asked by a reader, there is no set 'year' for this story. There are many modern amenities, yes, but as I mentioned in the first chapter, it's a sort of blending of eras; traditional meets modern.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 31:<strong>

**Peeling Layers**

_The rooster's crowing  
>In the middle of the night<br>Deceived the hearers;  
>But at Osaka's gateway<br>The guards are never fooled._

_**-Lady Sei Shonagon**_

* * *

><p><em>Karin:<em>

_Intense._

It was the one word she would use to describe the young man she was currently cooped up with in the stuffy gym (if you could even call it that). In moments like these, she could see how and why he'd be one of the most feared officers in a place like Byaku-Shinkyou. She could also see more of a resemblance to his older brother; both men seemed to scowl the same way when concentrating. Sasuke's brows were furrowed as if in deep thought, even while performing the simple task of wrapping wads of athletic tape around his hands and wrists. She sat on the floor and watched him perch on the bench; shamelessly admiring the way the gray tank top – now drenched with sweat – molded to his well-toned chest and shoulders. Although his healing time wasn't as fast as Naruto's, it was still good to see that must of the bruises and wounds he had sustained, the first time she saw him, were now nothing more than faded scars. She could take pride in knowing it was thanks to her treatments (for the most part) that he was relatively back to his former self.

Her gaze drifted lower to the black sweatpants, which hid the scar on his thigh but did little to mask the strength within them. For the past hour or so, she had watched those powerful legs kick at the punching bag, hardly betraying that they were still not quite at a hundred percent. Though she knew he was in pain – at least in the latter stages of the exercise – he wouldn't give up; simply gritting his teeth and kicking even harder until she was sure the bag would collapse in resignation.

She had done her best to keep up with him, going as far as obliging his request to be a sparring partner. He was careful not to hit her too hard, and he had taken her punches and kicks with hardly a wince (though it had been a pain to even get a single hit in because the guy was so light on his feet and could dodge effortlessly). Still, she felt she wasn't exactly what he needed when it came to that particular part of his training. He would need a stronger partner; maybe Shikamaru or Haku or hell even Naruto despite his 'disappearance' again with that Sergei character. His sudden reliance on her was wonderful, but she had to admit that the past week – or at least since the night of her outburst/confession to Sasuke – things have been a little strange around here.

(strange? Or just not 'normal'?)

She absently wiped her face with the towel (God, this gym was so damn hot!), and leaned against the wall to watch him begin lifting the weights. How he had the energy to do that after all that kick boxing and sparring was beyond her comprehension, but then again, the men she now lived with could not be considered ordinary, could they? They were each so strong in their own way, and keeping up with them - to show she was not just going to be an extra baggage to their goals - was what kept her going day after day.

_Are we really friends, Sasuke? Or are you just using me? And if you are using me...why? For what purpose? For whose benefit?_

She bit her lower lip and eyed her legs with an inner sigh. She had worn her shortest of gym shorts and her tank top was to show off her boobs (well what little she had). Still, she might have worn a sack cloth for all the attention Sasuke paid to her physical appearance. Sure he complimented her on some of the outfits she wore whenever they went out, but it had felt obligatory – like something that had to be said. In fact, she was damn sure if she hadn't opened her big fat mouth that night, he wouldn't have bothered paying that much extra attention to her. She knew he was only doing this because of the guilt trip she had put him through. Maybe he resented her for it but was doing his best to hide it beneath the layer of politeness and camaraderie he displayed when together.

In public, when she dared to wrap her arms around his, he wouldn't push them off. When she planted kisses on his cheek, he didn't wipe them off. And when she had finally dared to kiss him full on the lips yesterday after going to the movies (her date night idea), he hadn't shuddered in repulsion. It had been a great kiss all things considered; warm, sweet, and enough to get her panties wet with desire. And yet, beneath the foggy cloud of passion, she would come to realize that he had simply _tolerated_ it; not giving her the implication that he was enjoying or detesting the kiss. In her humble opinion, that was the worst kind of reaction to such an intimate act. It showed that he didn't really care, but that he would simply play along to keep her happy. She was sure if she proposed that they have sex – right here, right now in the gym – he'd probably say "sure" just to shut her up.

(you insensitive bastard)

However, could she really blame him? She had brought this upon herself, hadn't she? She had wanted him so much; rational thinking had flown out the window that night. She should have just let sleeping dogs lie and suffer her unrequited feelings in silence, but noooo, hurt, annoyed, crazy Karin had decided to show up. For goodness sakes, if even Haku could deal with such one-sided emotions, then why couldn't she?

(but think...think a little harder Karin. _Where_ is Haku? Where's the one you've dubbed little brother? Since that night he's hardly been around you, has he? You've been so busy living in the delusion that Sasuke wants you, you've forgotten all about him, haven't you? And haven't you noticed that 'their' relationship has cooled off as well? Don't you think you have something to do with that?)

_But what?_ She thought with a light frown. _What did I say?_

She wracked the memory banks to recall what exactly she must have said that night to contribute to whatever must have tapered off their close relationship. All she could remember was telling Sasuke about Haku's feelings for _Naruto_, and how much Haku must have been suffering knowing his feelings would not be reciprocated. Was that the problem then? Was Sasuke angry at the knowledge that Haku was interested in another male? Was Sasuke homophobic after all? But...if he was, then how would he have managed to live in a place like Byaku-Shinkyou, where she had heard stories about Orochimaru not allowing females to work or live there? Sasuke had grown up in such a male-oriented environment where the idea of homosexuality shouldn't be a surprise to him, so why was he so averse to such relationships? Haku had also revealed that he had always been attracted to males anyway, so Sasuke must have known all this time about his servant's sexual preference, so why should it be such a big deal all of a sudden? Why would her declaration be the cause of the rift between them?

_I'm just over thinking things,_ she thought with a slight shake of her head. _I did nothing wrong. However, what better way to know why things are the way they are without hearing it from the horse's mouth? _

Except said horse could be a goddamn impenetrable fortress when it came to seeking answers.

"Sasuke?" she called out. When he didn't answer (he was still lifting the weights, his exertion evident with the light grunts he gave with each lift of the heavy equipment), she called out a bit louder. "Sasuke?"

His response was a quick glance in her direction, and when he noticed that she intended to talk, he stopped long enough to return the equipment back into its position before sitting up with a light grunt and arch of his back. Reaching for a towel to mop off the sweat from his hair and face, he finally gave her his undivided attention.

"Something wrong?" he asked with a raised brow.

"No...not really," she replied with a smile. "Just wanted to commend you on working so hard today."

He had reached for a bottle of water, but stilled his movements to give her a look that was a mixture of exasperation and bemusement. She had stopped his exercise for this? Funny how she could almost read him well these days.

"...eh...thanks?" he replied with a light shrug and guzzled down almost half of the contents of the bottle. She licked her lips hungrily at the sight of his Adam's apple bobbing up and down with every swallow; wishing she would be given the permission to kiss it or lick it...in fact taste every sweat-drenched inch of that body. Ah, so not fair to have such wayward thoughts that would never come to fruition.

"Actually, I was wondering if you had seen Haku today," she said. "I haven't seen him much lately."

He shrugged again and wiped his face – as if to buy a little more time before giving an answer. "He's been going out a lot more," he finally admitted. "Maybe he's found another interest besides us."

"You two didn't have a fight, did you?"

"Why would we fight?" came the incredulous question though he wasn't fast enough to hide the stiffening of his shoulders or the brief dark expression that had filled his visage.

"Or maybe..." Karin mused as this hit her. "Maybe he's mad I've been spending more time with you and not him."

"I doubt that very much," Sasuke replied dryly. "Haku isn't one to..." He stopped; seemed to mull over what he was about to say before shaking his head lightly and muttering a barely audible "never mind" beneath his breath.

"So he doesn't tell you where he's going?"

"Why should I care where he's going?" Sasuke clipped back with slight impatience. "What he chooses to do is his business, Karin." He made as if to lie on the bench again, but her words froze him.

"You didn't tell him anything I said that night did you?"

He gave no response, but her sharp gaze had seen the quick flinch as he looked away. _Bingo!_ He _did_ probably confront Haku about his feelings for Naruto and now look what's happened. She sighed and crossed her arms before her chest.

"All right, handsome. Just what did you say to him?"

"Forgive me if I'm no longer in the mood to continue this line of conversation," came the clipped response that did not faze her. "You can leave if you're tired -"

"Don't patronize me," she snapped impatiently. "You might no longer treat him like a friend or servant or whatever it is you guys do, but he's _my_ friend and I love him like a brother, all right? I could never forgive myself if it turns out my big mouth caused the rift between you -"

"There is no rift," Sasuke interrupted calmly, though it was easy to tell he was really not too pleased with this. "We both came to a conclusion that we were no longer going to be master and servant. Haku is free to do as he pleases and under no obligation to be at my beck and call. That is all there is to it."

Karin's eyes narrowed. "Just like that? And he's okay with it?"

"Apparently. You don't see him around here, do you?"

"You sound pissed off about it -"

"I am **not** pissed off!"

"Ah, but you just raised your voice."

"That's because you insist on creating conflict where there isn't!" He took a deep breath and sat up to pin a dark look on her. "Haku is old enough to take care of himself, Karin. I'm sure he appreciates all you've done for him so far, but he's a big boy. He can handle whatever comes his way."

"You know...if I haven't lived with you guys for quite some time now, I'd almost believe that shit you just spilled to me."

"I beg your pardon?"

She gave a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes. "Look at you, Sasuke. Of course it's bothering you, but you're being too thickheaded to want to accept it. If that bench was a twig, it would have snapped in two with how hard you're clutching it. You're so defensive; it's like a neon sign announcing that you're just as worried about him as I am. I know Haku's not a child, but at the same time, you're all he's known for so many years. Suddenly throwing him out there -"

"...I did not throw him out -"

"...would be kind of a shock to him, wouldn't it? Knowing you, I'll bet you didn't have a good long talk about easing the transition into his 'freedom', did you?"

"A long talk?" Sasuke snorted in derision. "What could we possibly talk about? You seem to have mistaken our relationship for the kind where we spend hours sharing our innermost darkest secrets like you women." He ignored the angry look on her visage and continued firmly, almost as if trying to convince himself of what he was saying. "Haku knows that our relationship was never really based on that but purely that of a master over his servant. Even slaves – when granted their freedoms – do not usually feel the need to remain in the presence of the ones who imprisoned them. They spread the wings that have longed remained unfurled or clipped in an attempt to fly. Haku is simply making use of them for the first time in his life. Who am I to prevent him from doing so?"

"Even hatchlings need guidance to find their skies," Karin whispered as she raised her knees to her chest. She couldn't look at him now for she had _felt_ it; the heavy sadness laced in every bitter word uttered from his lips. For all his bravado, he was clearly hurt about something and she felt powerless at her inability to break through that wall between them. That despite his 'friendliness' and 'charm' over the past week, she really had no idea _who_ Uchiha Sasuke was at all. It would take more than mere flirtations and throwing oneself at him to thaw his heart, and as she lowered her head to her knees and heard him leaving the room (with a loud slam of the door behind him), she knew – without a doubt -that their little game of emotional chess was finally over.

_Checkmate._

* * *

><p>"I screwed up," she whined as she folded the pillow case slowly.<p>

"How so?" Temari shook out the tangled pair of socks and did her best to figure out which went with what.

Around them the laundromart bustled with its usual activity; the now familiar churn, whine and groans of the washing machines and dryers mingling with the lively talk from the other customers eager to get their weekend laundry complete. Though Karin would have liked to have done the washing on a weekday (Saturdays were always so busy), she had been too engrossed with her 'fling' with Sasuke. And besides, there had been no Haku to keep her company anyway.

"I tried to become his psychotherapist and he shut me out," Karin explained with a roll of her eyes. "I should have just kept my mouth shut and enjoyed the false ride while it lasted."

"The false ride? I thought you two were getting along so well."

"I wish!" Karin snorted and reached for the kimono to smoothen out. "I mean the outings and dates were great. He was the perfect gentlemen at all times, you know? Sure there were some things he didn't get or wouldn't do, but otherwise, he was game for everything. I thought for sure he'd push me away or tell me to stop touching him and all that, but...no...we even almost got to first base on movie night." She sighed dreamily and pressed the kimono to her chest. "He is _such_ a _great_ kisser, TemTem. God, it's like _damn_!"

Temari chuckled. "And yet you broke up...how? If everything sounds great, why would he walk away from it?"

"Because he was only going through the motions," Karin pouted and lowered the dress to begin folding it. "It later hit me that night, while taking a bath, that he might have been all lovey dovey, but there was really...no _feeling_ behind it, you know? I mean, the kisses were passionate, but it was just...not all there."

"He was distracted?"

"Something like that. Urgh. I was so damn busy being too happy about being with him, and I really didn't notice it until it was too late."

"So you think he was just dating you for the heck of it? To make you happy?"

Karin nodded glumly. "I think it might have been due to something I said to him the other night about how much of a jerk he was." She proceeded to tell Temari of the conversation that night and Sasuke's reaction to it. She also voiced her concerns over his relationship with Haku.

"Sucks to see them act like this. It was so cute when Haku was all over him though. Sasuke-sama this and Sasuke-sama that. I mean, you couldn't say anything bad about his precious master. He'd literally cut you with his eyes."

The girls giggled at the imagery this conjured up. Haku, for all his sweetness, could reveal a much deadlier side to him when provoked.

"I see what you mean," Temari agreed. "But don't you think that same relationship woe applies to Naruto as well?"

"How do you mean?"

"Remember the other day when Naruto came back and you asked Sasuke to come greet him and he refused? What was that all about?"

Karin shook her head. "Meh, those two seem to argue every other fucking day, so that was no real surprise to me. I'll bet they argued over something dumb again. Makes you want to knock their heads together and make them wake up, doesn't it?"

"I thought they were getting along just fine until Sergei came into the picture."

"He's hot, isn't he?"

"Who?"

"Sergei."

The women looked at each other for a long minute before bursting into loud laughter that had some of the other customers glancing at them with raised brows.

"You are so bad, Karin!" Temari snickered. "That muscle-bound freak is your type? And he's old, isn't he?"

"Old? Please! He must be in his early thirties at least. That's not old," Karin argued though she was still trying to stifle her giggles. "Sure his accent is a little weird, and he's all "I'm going to make a man out of you and you and you" and he can be a jerk with the way he talks to us, but you've gotta admit that face isn't bad to look at."

"I don't know. I've never really found myself that attracted to foreigners," Temari confessed. "Besides, I've got my man, so everyone else looks like crap compared to him."

Karin laughed and nudged Temari gently. "You are so in love with that guy, it's sickening, but I'm so excited about the wedding!"

The talk promptly went into plans for it, and what dress she planned to wear and so on and so forth. However, it wasn't until when Karin shuffled toward the dryer to remove the last batch of clothes did something finally catch her attention. She would have looked away – since there was nothing really strange about people peering into the laundromart through the grimy windows – but there was something about that pale face and low haircut which had her doing a double take.

(seen him before)

She looked again, but the man was gone. It still didn't stop the sudden chill that went down her spine, and completely on instinct, she abandoned her basket of clothes and dashed toward the exit. She could barely hear Temari's concerned call of her name as she pushed open the door – nearly running into new customers with their baskets of laundry – and dashed out to the street. In the hot afternoon, the entire block seemed to swim and waver before her frantic gaze, but she squinted and ran around the building toward the area she had last seen him.

_Nothing. _

"Did I imagine him there then?"

"Kari...eh...Ho Sung?"

She spun around with her heart in her throat, but immediately felt a flood of relief at the sight of that familiar sweet face.

"Haku," she cried out; arms expanding before engulfing him in a big hug. His low giggle was like music to her ears, and she was embarrassed to find tears filling her eyes as she pulled back to really look at him. He hadn't changed, which was stupid to think he would considering they hadn't been apart for that long, and yet it felt like she wasn't seeing someone different. She couldn't really explain it if asked, but there was an expression in his eyes (though they smiled now) that gave off vibes of being empty and sad. Surprisingly he was dressed in western clothing today; a rock band tee-shirt, a pair of black jeans, matching sneakers and his hair in its usual bun and loose ponytail. He scratched his nose with a sheepish expression on his visage; perhaps noticing her silent appraisal.

"I felt like it today," he explained to her unspoken question. "Much more comfortable to walk around in this than my kimono -"

"_Where_ have you been?" she queried.

"To the zoo," he replied, while holding up the bag filled with souvenirs he picked up. "I went with a friend of mine."

"Friend? What friend?" She looked around him; unaware of how tight her grip was becoming on his shoulders.

"His name is Sai," Haku winced and tried to duck from her touch. "We met at the park the other day, remember? The one I tried to show you -"

"Not your imaginary friend?"

"He's not imaginary," Haku pouted. "He was here too. The only reason we stopped was because I noticed you and Temari-chan through the window, so I wanted to say hello." As if on cue, he waved to someone causing her to turn. Temari was waving at them from inside. Karin lifted her hand in salute.

"But where is he then?" Karin insisted with a raised brow. "Looks like this friend of yours doesn't like me. This is the second time he's pulled the disappearing act."

"He's just shy. He's not used to making friends easily," Haku reasoned with a light shrug. He pulled out what looked like a carved statue of a panda. "Hey, look at this. It's supposed to bring you good luck. Isn't it cute?"

Karin accepted the panda with a small smile. It fit into her palm nicely. However, there was something still bugging her. "Your friend," she began carefully. "What does he look like?"

"Hmm?" Haku was still digging through his bag. "Oh, he's about my height...short black hair...pale..."

"I see."

He looked up then; his gaze sharp and somewhat wary. "What do you mean by that?"

"What do I mean?" she replied just as warily. "I mean for a guy who was so shy, he had no problems peering into the laundromart some time ago."

"That's because I was showing you to him, and he wanted to make sure of what he was seeing," Haku replied tightly.

"Don't you find it odd that your friend wouldn't want to meet us? We don't bite, do we?"

"I told you already, he's shy."

"Some excuse."

Haku straightened up; his brown eyes now cold and distant. It broke Karin's heart to see him act this way, but after hearing Sasuke's concerns about a plant amongst them, it was difficult to reconcile Haku's new 'friend' slipping into their lives so conveniently. She told herself it wasn't just jealousy at someone else taking her place, but concern for all their lives.

"Invite him over for dinner," she said calmly. "Even he can't refuse that, can he?"

"I thought you wouldn't want him to see us since you're so damn suspicious of him."

"Then tell him we're all going to be having dinner at the restaurant down the street. I guess with you bringing him here, he already knows where we live."

Haku's jaw worked, but she could tell that this was something that was beginning to sink in. The brief flash of uncertainty in his eyes told the story.

"I didn't exactly specify our apartment building," he argued weakly. "And I haven't really revealed much about us anyway -"

"But you just showed him who I am...who Temari is -"

"It doesn't matter -"

"Did you tell him you lived with us?"

Haku's glance shifted and Karin sucked in a deep breath. "I don't believe it."

"I didn't say it like that," Haku argued. "I just said I know those two women in the laundromart. I want to stop over and say "hi" that's all. Honest."

Karin narrowed her gaze, and in a voice she was careful to keep flat and firm, she spoke her intentions. "I know you're eager to make friends, Haku, and I realize just how lonely it can be here when those you care about seem to have abandoned you...myself included, and I sincerely apologize for that. However, we must be extremely careful from now on as Itachi has given us a warning that Orochimaru has someone working for him here in town already. I am not, in any way, saying that this Sai could be the spy, but you're going to have to be more discreet and vigilant around him. I want you to go back to your apartment and really think about this guy you've been seeing so far. Think about all the conversation you've had and how he behaves and acts around you. Try to put the pieces together and if you see anything out of place, do not hesitate to let me know, do you understand?"

Haku looked as if he had no intention of doing any such thing; his lips thinning and his features looking resolute.

"Haku!" Karin snapped impatiently.

"Fine," he replied coldly. "I'll do as you request. However, you should be more careful too. It's because you used my real name like this in public that he was able to tell I wasn't Chung-hee."

At the rush of color to her cheeks, he lowered his gaze and withdrew from her touch. "I'll be going now. Sorry for interrupting your activities."

"Hak...Chung-hee..." Karin began, but was stopped as Haku – who had begun to walk away – looked over his shoulder with a penetrating stare.

"There's one other thing that's been bothering me," he said quietly. "Since you and Sasuke-sama are quite close now...you didn't reveal anything about me to him, did you?"

She opened her mouth to deny it, but he must have seen something on her expression because he gave a small sad smile. "I figured as much. How else would he have put two and two together?"

"What are you talking -?"

"Have a good day," Haku interrupted with a polite bow of his head.

She could only watch helplessly as he jogged across the street, narrowly escaping being run over by a disgruntled taxi driver. Her hands formed tight fists at her side; her initial reaction to scream at him for being such a goddamn jerk! Why the hell were all them so immature? What had she done wrong besides try to make him see reason? Why was he so –?

(he's here!)

She spun around as the hairs on the back of her neck prickled in awareness. She was being watched. She was sure of it. Tentatively, she made her way toward the direction she felt sure he was hiding, knowing she ought to let Temari know what was happening. She also had no weapon on her, but if it came to a fist-fight, she was sure she could hold her own with him – at least until she had to scream for help.

At the turn, she was confronted with a narrow alley behind the buildings on the main street, with its dumpsters, overflowing garbage cans or bags simply left to decay beneath the sun. Back here, one could see the effects of the machinery in the laundromart with the billowing cloud of smoke and louder roar of the engines from pipes stretching to the heavens. A stray cat sat on a slatted roof, licking its paws with no care in the world. Another dashed right between her legs; making her squeal in surprise (and fear) before she gave a light laugh to chide herself.

"Too jumpy," she whispered. "I should just go back and...argh!"

"Don't make a sound," came the hoarse, wet whisper as a strong arm wrapped itself around her neck to squeeze until she felt her airway constrict with the pressure. Her eyes watered but she could at least make out from the ghastly veiny tattooed arm that this guy was definitely not who or what she had been expecting. He smelled like rotten fish and the gross out factor reached an all time high as he licked her cheek with a heavy trail of saliva left behind.

(you...fucking...pig!)

She heaved herself up with every bit of strength she had left and lifted her legs to push herself off the wall causing the man to give a grunt of surprise as she flung herself back with the weight of her body. Her neck was, mercifully, released and she felt the world spin a little even as she settled back to earth to get her bearings. She spun to confront her attacker and found herself tossed like a sack of potatoes against one of the dumpsters, which sent her glasses flying off. The collision was agonizing, but she was still alert enough to duck out of the way as he came charging towards her again. Desperately she struck out a leg, glad to hear his grunt of pain as she made contact with his torso. Unfortunately, the slimy bastard grabbed the extended appendage to sink his teeth into her shin eliciting a howl of pain. This creep was planning to eat her alive! He was tugging quite hard and just as she felt herself about to lose her footing, something dark and incredibly fast dashed out from nowhere to send her attacker flying into the opposite wall with a thunderous crash.

_What the...?_

She staggered to her feet, gasping for breath as she watched the exchange before her. Her attacker was on the ground, but straddling him - with what looked like a knife clutched in his hand - was none other than Haku's 'shy' friend. The hand with the knife descended with such authority, hearing the attacker's grunt and then blood-filled gurgle into silence made Karin's stomach churn with revulsion. And still it wasn't enough for this 'Sai' for he punched the attacker again and again and again...

"Karin!" came the sudden cry that had both of them looking up quickly.

It was Temari, who promptly slapped her hands over her mouth as she took in the situation. She ran – stopped as she had almost stepped on Karin's glasses, picked it up and made her way to her trembling friend. "Are you all right? I saw you running back here and didn't know what was going on...?"

Karin shook her head and pointed instead to the young man who was now getting off the much bigger prone figure. Sai looked no older than Haku, but with the blood stains on his face, hands and clothes, he looked wild...insane even. On closer inspection, however, the weapon she had assumed was a knife was actually nothing more than a paintbrush that he was tucking away into a pouch around his waist.

"Are you all right?" he asked in a quiet voice dispelling the illusion of insanity. He looked at his hands in distaste before lifting his gaze again to give the stunned women an apologetic smile. "Sorry...I think I went a bit overboard with him."

"...is he dead?" Temari asked warily. All they could see of the man's face was a bloody pulp. Clearly this Sai packed a punch, and it make Karin's blood run cold. She knew she owed him his life, but there was still something not quite...

"I don't think so," Sai was saying. He reached out to kick the man's side gently. "I should probably call the police to take him away. It's a good thing I was on my way back and heard the commotion."

"On your way back from where?" Karin asked. She hated the way her voice sounded out of breath and still shaky, but she still watched him carefully.

He gave a smile that felt slightly forced to her. "I was on my way to the bus stop, but I took the wrong turn. I was heading in the opposite direction when I heard your scream."

As did several others apparently as a few back doors opened along the alley to reveal curious heads and gazes now trained on them.

"Can someone please call the police? My friend was attacked," Sai called out in perfect Hangul; a reminder that he had been speaking to them in Japanese all this time and neither of them had blinked or bothered querying how he had figured they weren't Korean in the first place. Probably Haku telling him, Karen deduced bitterly.

"You should get cleaned up," Temari suggested. "They might suspect you as being the one responsible for -"

"It's okay," Sai reassured them as one of the onlookers began screeching something to them. Sai turned to the woman, bowed and said something to her which seemed to appease her for all but a minute because she was back to complaining about something else. "I think she wants us off her property, but you should see about your leg."

Both Karin and Temari looked down to see what he meant. Sure enough, the bite marks on Karin's left shin looked ugly and in need of medical attention. Her quick assessment showed that he hadn't gotten in too deep, so nothing a good cleansing and application of basic first aid couldn't handle when she got back to her apartment.

"Thank you," she muttered as she allowed Temari to steady her while slipping on her glasses. "For helping me and all that."

Sai bowed. "It was no problem. I just wish I was here earlier."

"Well, you are a lifesaver all the same," Temari insisted with a firm nod. "We really appreciate it. Come on, Karin," she whispered softly. "Let's get out of here."

Karin nodded in agreement, but not before looking over her shoulder one last time. Her eyes met the watchful dark ones, and she shuddered as he gave that same weird smile that was neither genuine nor faked. At the slight nod of his head in acknowledgement, she reciprocated the gesture before turning away with a bite of her lip in thought.

"Don't like him," she muttered.

"What? What's that?" Temari queried as they stepped onto the main street again.

"That guy...he...he creeps me out."

"The guy who attacked you?"

"No...Sai."

"Sai?"

Karin took a deep breath and gave her friend a wan smile. "It's a long story, TemTem. I'll tell you everything when I put my damn feet up and get some ice on it, okay?"

"All right..."

"Good. Now, let's get the fuck out of here. I've had just about enough excitement for one day."

* * *

><p><em>Sai: <em>

He didn't wait for the police to arrive.

There would be questions asked, forms to fill, and unnecessary protocol he was in no mood to deal with. Waiting until a good crowd of curious onlookers had surrounded the comatose body, he slipped into the shadows and away from the scene as quickly as he arrived.

As he walked briskly between the buildings, he peeled off his stained shirt and wiped his hands and face as best he could. He balled the useless clothing and tossed it into a garbage can before bursting out into the opposite side of the street. He spied the playground and public restrooms, where he slipped into before grabbing the attention of anyone wondering why there was a half-naked man in the vicinity.

Lucky for him it was empty, though it wasn't exactly high on the hygienic scale. However, he was used to such grimy, graffiti-infested conditions and as he turned on the tap to begin washing himself, he ruminated over what he had accomplished so far today.

His outing with Haku had been the highpoint of his day; something he had looked forward to the moment he was given this assignment.

(just like the old days)

He rinsed his face and peered at his reflection in the grimy mirror; an act that no longer brought about the same emotions as it did in the earlier days. It had taken a while, but he had finally come to terms that he was no longer the one formerly known as Shin (or in Haku's loving terms – Shin-chan). His name was Sai, one of the best – if not the best – undercover agents for Orochimaru's secret watchdog organization. It was one thing to be torn away from all that you knew as a child, but another to become an indispensible member of an organization set out to do good for society.

_Never forget who you are. You are the shadow of justice; created and trained to make this nation a better place to live one dangerous mission at a time. _

Taken into custody at eleven years old, just because he shoplifted a few times to fend for himself, Sai could still recall the day Orochimaru had visited the local police station and the frenzy the great man's presence had caused. No one had expected to see him there on that day, and Sai could still remember how the powerful but elusive leader had looked when the light shone on him in a particular way. Wide-eyed and mesmerized by that hypnotic serpent-like gaze, Orochimaru's gentle touch and words of encouragement still resonated with Sai until this day.

"You have so much potential," Orochimaru had said with one of the rare warm smiles ever thrown his way. "How would you like to become a change for good and all that is just, my dear?"

"Yes...yes, sir, I will."

Anything to get out of the wretched life he lived. What good came out of living day to day like a street urchin, never knowing when you were going to end up dead? Lord Orochimaru had given him a new life, and within the walls of Byaku-Shinkyou, Sai had found a new home. The only problem was that he didn't do well with others and found it difficult to make new friends. He kept to himself most of the time, only becoming animated when it was time to train at the dojo. He had considered it an honor to become Uchiha Sasuke's sparring partner; secretly considering the stoic kid his rival even though Sasuke had not given a damn about such things. To Sasuke, Sai had been nothing more than another wannabe officer-in-training, not worthy of his time for his goals and sights were much loftier than Sai could ever hope to attain.

Sai did not resent it, for he knew where his place was, and besides, when things were not so busy around the headquarters, he was content to spend hours working on his art techniques. He knew he had an innate gift, for some of his sketches had fetched him a yen or two while hawking them on the streets back home. However, showing off his skills here would have brought him no looks of admiration. At least he had assumed it wouldn't until the young boy with the long hair and girlish looks had approached him.

_Haku._

Sai knew that Haku was one of Orochimaru's personal servants; those special select few chosen to serve the great master at all times. Sai sometimes envied that position for he would have loved to be by Orochimaru's side whenever needed. However, it was a rarity to see his personal servants around the grounds, so one could imagine Sai's shock to have Haku peering at his art and praising him for a job well done. To say the rest of his week had felt like floating on air would have been an understatement. Sai found himself looking forward to Haku's impromptu visits; finding pleasure in listening to that sing-song voice, smelling the sweet perfumes that seemed to radiate off that perfect skin in waves, or simply staring and memorizing that beautiful face until Sai was able to draw it even in his sleep. Haku became the closest thing he had to a friend in Byaku-Shinkyou and for the next four years they maintained a relationship that meant a lot to him. It didn't matter that Haku was three years his junior. All that mattered was that there was someone who saw past the exterior and could accept him for who he was.

His only regret was that he never got a chance to say goodbye.

"Hold on, man! I'll be right back. Gotta take a leak," came the sudden loud call from someone outside the restrooms. Sai pressed himself against the wall and waited until the shadow of the newcomer flickered past before he appeared whistling happily. The guy was a little on the stocky side, but Sai needed a shirt and this would have to do.

Moving swiftly, he wrapped his arm around the unsuspecting man's neck and squeezed just hard enough to send him unconscious without so much as a pip escaping the victim's lips. He slid the man to the floor and took off the leather jacket. After debating, for all of ten seconds, on whether or not to wear just the jacket or take the shirt beneath, he settled for leaving the man the jacket and wearing the tee shirt. It stunk of his sweat and cologne (something cheap), but it would have to do for now.

"Excuse me," he apologized to the still comatose man. "You should be awake in about five minutes give or take. Thanks for the shirt."

He stepped outside, fully expecting to have the man's friend accost him, but noticing that he was too busy trying to chat up a girl, Sai blended with the crowd easily; his mind racing with what possible story he could feed Kimimaro tonight.

So far, he had managed to be vague with his responses to the impatient man, hoping he could at least savor a few more outings and visits with Haku before he gave his final report. All things considered, this mission had been relatively easy as following the trail left by Itachi and Shisui – with their band of misfits – wasn't as difficult as once imagined. It really was amazing how much one could accomplish with just the right monetary exchange or violent negotiations. He arrived just as Itachi and Shisui were leaving for Japan again, and since then, he had bided his time; waiting for just the right opportunity to strike.

Meeting Jiraiya – of all people – had been a pleasant surprise; an icing on the cake if you will. His stint at the host club was just to provide him with extra cover and a means of gathering information. How would he have guessed that the former _oyabun_ of a faction of the Bakufu Syndicate would come waltzing in with two of his surveillance subjects? His initial plan had been to remain silent while Sasuke and Naruto were attacked, but in an effort to gain their trust, Sai knew he'd have to blow his cover a little. He had really thought Sasuke would have recognized him, but was pleased (though somewhat irritated) when he didn't.

(guess I really was a nobody to him back then)

A short bus ride brought him to his next destination, where he hopped off at the intersection and made his way down the quiet but well-tended corporate boulevard. It really was funny how this side of town gave the illusion of being the hub-nub of industry and commerce, but just two blocks over were derelict buildings in need of serious renovations. He shook his head and made his way into one of the offices, where he was greeted by the security with a familiar nod of recognition. Again, the power of money at play. He took the elevator to the highest floor, walked past several offices whose occupants were too busy to bother staring at the young man in the blood-stained pants (he had tried to wipe those off as best he could). Pushing open the door with the words 'PERSONNEL ONLY', Sai locked it behind him and set himself into position. It was a cluttered room filled with broken or unused office equipment but perfect for what he had been doing the past few days. He dug around one of the top shelves for the high-powered binoculars and positioned himself by the window.

6:45pm.

There were still at it.

He adjusted the lens of the binoculars to see better. The Russian and the blond guy – Uzumaki Naruto. Sai already had a dossier about Sergei Mutko and could rattle off his stats if need be. However, his main interest was Naruto; one who – according to Kimimaro – was of interest as well to Orochimaru-sama. Why? Kimimaro had not told him, but Sai had gone digging on his own and what he had learned was quite intriguing. No wonder Orochimaru (and probably Ikegami) wanted him dead. Sai would happily do the deed – and would have had many opportunities to take Naruto out – but a part of him really did want to see what would happen should Naruto survive and confront those who sought his head. Sometimes it really as worth sitting back and watching the shit hit the fan.

Something clattered to the floor from his pouch, breaking his concentration. He leaned down to pick it up, only for his fingers to tighten around the carved dolphin as memories of his day with Haku came back to him. He lowered the binoculars – Sergei and Naruto forgotten – to caress the small figurine gently. He could still remember Haku's beautiful smile as they came across the stall that sold the cheap souvenirs. Sai hadn't wanted any, but how could he deny Haku's plea for them to get the objects for his collection? Seeing that face break into a genuine smile had been worth the humiliation of paying so much for something so amateur. Aside from that, their zoo excursion had been a blast. Sai couldn't remember the last time he had so much fun with someone he cared about, though a part of him had still been moping over the sob story about his love for Uzumaki Naruto.

(what do you see in that doofus?)

More than once he had been tempted to ask Haku that question, but in an effort to remain neutral in the matter, Sai had kept his peace and given advice as best he could. His secret hope was that things would **not** work out between them, for it seemed like Naruto was more content to spend his time with the Russian than deal with Haku and his feelings.

_You could do so much better,_ he thought with a rueful smile, _but not with someone like me. I will betray you eventually, Haku. What you have done to Orochimaru and Kimimaro-sama is unforgivable. They both took care of you when no one else would, and for you to turn your back on them like this...it cannot be forgiven. Though Kimimaro-sama says you must be returned unharmed, I will have to teach you a lesson first before giving you to him. Betrayal is inexcusable. No matter how much it hurts me to have to do this to you._

He smashed the figurine against the window sill until nothing remained but flakes of wood. He took a deep breath and cleared his mind and thoughts from all things Haku. For now, he had a job to do and in Sai's world, there was simply nothing more important than loyalty and duty.

Goodness knew he had more than plenty of that to spare.

* * *

><p><em>Haku: <em>

He sneezed and wondered if he was coming down with a cold. Hoping he didn't, as it would mean having to visit Karin for medication, Haku sniffled and rearranged the figurines on the window sill. He had given Sai the dolphin, but with the bear, panda, whale, lion, gorilla, monkey and zebra in place, he had to admit that they looked quite colorful and added a certain flair to the apartment.

/ I know you're eager to make friends, Haku, and I realize just how lonely it can be here when those you care about seem to have abandoned you...myself included, and I sincerely apologize for that. /

_Like you really care,_ he thought bitterly. She had barely spared him a glance while in her fantasy world with Sasuke-sama, and now all of a sudden she was pretending to give a damn about him? He rolled his eyes and pushed himself away from the window. This was no time to be mulling over what that woman had spewed earlier. He had to begin making dinner with the hope that Sasuke would want to eat something when he returned. So far he seemed more content sharing his meals with Karin and hadn't bothered touching much of what Haku prepared these days. It still didn't stop him from making meals for two. If it wasn't finished tonight, he could always have the leftovers tomorrow.

(or drop them off in Naruto-kun's apartment. I think Shikamaru-san has a spare set of keys...)

/ However, we must be extremely careful from now on as Itachi has given us a warning that Orochimaru has someone working for him here in town already. I am not, in any way, saying that this Sai could be the spy, but you're going to have to be more discreet and vigilant around him. /

His once rapid chopping of leeks, for the broth, became slower and more thoughtful.

/ I want you to go back to your apartment and really think about this guy you've been seeing so far. Think about all the conversation you've had and how he behaves and acts around you. Try to put the pieces together and if you see anything out of place, do not hesitate to let me know, do you understand?" /

_Put together the pieces._

He grabbed the large white onion and began to peel it slowly.

_Put together the pieces._

He didn't want to. He didn't want Karin's words to affect him so much. He didn't want to be mired in her false concerns, but if what she said about a plant being sent to scope them out was true...then had he been so blinded by his need for companionship he had deliberately avoided all the warning signs? How could he live with himself if Sai really did turn out to be the spy all this time? How could he explain to the others his rationale for being with him? How could he look Sasuke-sama in the eye and admit his failures? How could he...?

_Wait! Wait! Wait! Why are you already indicting him without giving him a chance to explain himself? Just because Karin's planted the seed of doubt in you doesn't mean that Sai's actually the spy. It could be anyone. It could be - _

"He knew my name but claimed he had overheard Karin saying it public, making it seem like he's been watching me for quite a while."

_And why?_

"Because he says he was too shy to approach me."

He frowned and put the pot of water to boil.

"He looks so much like Shin-chan and yet claims he doesn't know who Shin-chan is."

He tossed the chopped leeks, onions, tomatoes and garlic into the bubbling liquid; absently reaching for the slab of beef he'd have to slice thinly.

"He draws...but like an amateur compared to Shin-chan and yet..."

The knife froze in mid-air.

Sai had been drawing with his _left_ hand. Of course it was natural for the left to be considerably weaker than the right especially if you were a natural rightie. So Sai must have been smart enough to use his left giving the illusion he was a terrible artist. How the hell had all this escaped him then?

(oh right, you were too busy moping to really pay attention at the time, remember?)

"Still," he whispered feverishly; feeling his head begin to pound as everything he had so blindly ignored began to unravel like a spool of thread. "Still...it doesn't mean anything. It doesn't mean..."

/ "You really shouldn't over think this, Haku. I mean if your master really hated you, he'd have kicked you out of the apartment by now, right? /

"...doesn't mean...anything," he finished in a croak as Sai's words came back to haunt him. Sai had mentioned the apartment. Sai had _known_ he lived in an apartment...but he didn't recall ever telling Sai he lived in such a place. Why would Sai assume that? Haku had mentioned living with a woman during his diatribe, so why hadn't Sai assumed they all lived together in a house?

(because he knows. He knows everything. He's been watching you all this time, playing you for a fool, toying with your emotions, exploiting your weaknesses and drawing out information because you were such an idiot for trusting so easily and he knowsheknowsheknowshe...!)

"Haku? Are you...whoa! Easy now..."

He had spun around so fast with the knife in hand; ready to bury it deeply into someone when he met the bemused and cautious gaze of his (ex) master standing at the doorway. He had been so lost in his thoughts he hadn't even heard Sasuke walk in!

"Sor...sorry, Sasuke-sama," he panted breathlessly as he lowered the knife. "I thought..." He swallowed and tried to control his trembling. "I just thought you were someone else, that's all."

"I hope so," Sasuke replied warily. "You aren't going to make me start sleeping with my eyes open, are you?"

Haku blushed darkly and shook his head in embarrassment; only to look up shyly to notice there was a semblance of a smile on Sasuke's face. For some reason, seeing that little gesture, coupled with the newfound knowledge that he might have been seeing a spy all this time and the added stress of the past few days altogether, bubbled to the surface in a flood which had him bursting into uncontrollable tears. Needless to say, this sudden outburst of emotion left his master stunned, and it nearly took a whole minute before Haku felt the strong arm around his shoulder in comfort.

That didn't help in the slightest.

He wailed even louder, burying his face against Sasuke's strong chest for he realized just how much he had missed and needed this contact with his former master. Haku's misery was so palpable; Sasuke actually had to bite his lower lip to control the unexpected surge of empathy within him. He had never seen his former servant this distraught over anything.

"It's okay," he tried to reassure Haku as he rubbed the younger man's shoulders gently. "It's going to be okay."

"No...no, it's not," Haku sniffled miserably. He looked up with reddened eyes and a face streaked with tears. "I think...I think I might have been seeing the spy Orochimaru sent to us, Sasuke-sama!"

* * *

><p>Half-an-hour later, when the waterworks had stopped and both men had managed to get a few spoonfuls of dinner into their stomachs, they mused over what Haku had recounted over the meal. And though he was thrilled that Sasuke had accepted his dinner invitation, seeing those handsome features creased in a frown was enough to make him lose his appetite. He had – in the words of Naruto-kun – fucked up big time, and if turned out that Sai really was the plant then –<p>

(_I owe all of them an apology especially Karin-chan_)

"You will have to see him again," Sasuke finally said with a slight nod.

"But...why?" Haku gasped in shock. "If I see him -!"

"If you suddenly stop seeing him, he'll figure out that you know the truth already. You have to keep giving him the illusion that you are unaware of what he might be and try to see if you can get him to slip up to confirm your theories."

"Slip up...?"

"Try to bring up more conversation about Shin and Byaku-Shinkyou," Sasuke stated firmly. "Subtle references here and there and make sure you watch his body language this time. If I know people like Sai, they are well trained in hiding their true emotions. It was how he managed to fool you all this time. Though I must admit that you not being too observant is quite unlike you, Haku."

"Not my fault," came the low mumble that had Sasuke straining to hear him.

"What was that?"

"I said it's not really my fault," Haku whispered. "I've been...I've not been feeling like myself all week and it's because of...of..."

Sasuke watched the lowered head with a heavy pang in his chest; realizing now how true Karin's words had been. He had honestly assumed his decision to sever their master-servant relationship would have worked out for the best. Yet watching Haku pine away or disappear to seek refuge in the arms of someone who might end up being a traitor, had been harder than he thought.

_I should have eased his transition,_ he thought wearily. _Not made it seem like I didn't need him ever again. _

"Haku..." he began as he took a deep breath and sought for a way to say this clearly. "Look...I don't hate or despise you...or at least I couldn't for very long. I was just...taken aback by what you said that night and just felt you needed your space and time to grow without me, do you understand? You mean way too much to me than what you think."

Tear-filled brown eyes met and held his, and Sasuke could feel his cheeks burn at the pure gratitude within them. "I thought you hated me for telling you about my feelings for Naruto-kun," Haku admitted. "That I wanted us to become rivals over -"

"And I told you there would be no argument from me about that," Sasuke interrupted with a wave of his hand, though he found he couldn't meet those eyes again as he said this. "He is yours and I will not interfere -"

"But why not?" Haku asked incredulously. "Do you not have any feelings at all for him? Are you really content watching me woo him even if he doesn't reciprocate my feelings?"

"Haku, I -"

"If Naruto-kun was to take me in his arms right now and kiss me or decides he wants to consummate our relationship sexually...will you be okay with that?"

Sasuke parted his lips; ready to state that none of that would bother him in the slightest, and yet meeting the earnest gaze told him that whatever lie he could conjure up would not be believed. It was bad enough he still found himself imagining how Haku had gone down on Naruto, imagining if Naruto had enjoyed being with Haku more than with him, as well as wondering how and if Naruto would have been more faithful if he had gone that far with him in his apartment. Not that he even had an idea or clue on how to even begin initiating the concept of taking that thing within his mouth -

"I'll have to be," he finally admitted with a small smile, while clearing his throat and forcing himself out of the mental image that made him squirm with discomfort. "Because I broke things off with Naruto for you."

Haku's eyes widened at this news. "You...I don't understand."

"Naruto and I will no longer be doing anything intimate," Sasuke explained as an inexplicable lump came to his throat. "We both came to a mutual agreement about it, and that's all there is to it, Haku. So you are free to pursue him for as long as you want. You have my blessing."

He had meant the last bit to come out as a light-hearted joke, but in the deafening silence that followed, it seemed like he had given a death knell instead. He sighed and rubbed his aching forehead.

"Look, can we not talk about Naruto now? We still have to deal with Sai and what this means to us. You said Karin knows about him already, yes?"

Haku nodded slowly. "Did she tell you anything about him?"

"I haven't seen her since we left the gym in the morning," Sasuke replied in a way that told Haku that there was something amiss with that relationship. Did they have an argument?

"Besides, I just got back home," Sasuke admitted with a shrug. "I've been...around."

_Taking a very long walk in an attempt to find their goddamn training ground, but no luck. Anyway – _

"When next do you see him?"

"We didn't make any real plans," Haku admitted. "But I did say I'd be at the park tomorrow. Maybe he'll show up then."

Sasuke nodded in satisfaction and reached for another slice of beef, which was dipped in the delicious broth. God, how he had missed Haku's cooking. Karin wasn't bad, but she paled in comparison to the tenderness and rich flavor always savored in his former servant's meals.

"Remember your training, Haku," he warned with a light frown. "You are just as good as Sai if not better at being able to mask your emotions. Do not give away that you are wary of him, for if he senses even the slightest hesitation, he will strike. Again, we are simply going on hunches here, so I need you to make sure he's definitely who we are looking for. In the interim, I'll let the others know as well as Jiraiya when he arrives. He should want to know about this guy since he's the one who told Jiraiya about the fight."

"You think he set it all up?"

"Doubt it," Sasuke mused. "But I wouldn't put it past him anyway. Damn it." He stuck his chopsticks into his plate with barely constrained irritation.

"I'm sorry, Sasuke-sama," Haku muttered with a bowed head. "This is all my faul -"

"Don't apologize again...for anything," he added with a knowing look in his eyes. "We have all slipped up due to ...the past events of the week, so it's understandable. What matters now is how we handle things from now on."

**Thud.**

They both stiffened as they heard the sudden sound outside their door. It sounded like someone or something falling to the ground. Haku would have risen to find out what it was, when the undeniable sound of Naruto's voice (barely audible) apologizing to Shikamaru (or whoever else was out there)...and then muffled laughter...had him half-sitting/kneeling with his heart pounding hard in his chest. Unbeknownst to him, his earlier gloom seemed to have dissipated in that moment; his eyes alight with a glow that had been missing for quite a while. He hadn't seen Naruto in so long, and just the very thought of –

"Well?" came the quiet question from Sasuke that brought him rudely back to reality.

Haku looked back with his cheeks burning. He tried to read the expression on Sasuke's face but could tell nothing from it. Besides, it still felt a little 'strange' to be this happy though his (ex) master had obviously stated he was no longer vying for Naruto's attention.

"I...uh..." he began in a weak stutter.

"You want to see him, don't you?" Sasuke said with a small smile. "So go. I'll clean up."

"Oh, no!" came the immediate reaction. "Let me do it -"

"Haku," Sasuke growled in warning. "I won't fall to pieces from washing dishes. You might not get this opportunity again, so go. You have my permission."

At the familiar command, Haku gave a tremulous smile of gratitude, bowed his head and finally left the room with seemingly an extra skip in his step. The door would barely close before Sasuke overhead the joyful cry of "Naruto-kun!" from his Haku's lips, and envy – like molten lava – within his heart had him biting his lower lip to squash down the unwarranted emotion.

_The freedom to be that honest..._

He doubted there would ever come a day he'd say that name with so much joy and happiness, but for now he'd have to keep his improbable fantasies aside. Haku's story about Sai was a lot more worrisome than he let on. He knew he should have suspected something the night they had been dropped off from the station and he had noticed Sai watching him carefully. If Haku's investigation turned out to be the truth...then just how much trouble were they in? If Sai was already sending information to Orochimaru, who knew just how many more secret agents were lurking around the city waiting to strike when they least expected?

_No longer safe here..._

He eyed the tiny apartment he had called home for the past two months, studying every corner, crack, and décor thanks to Haku's whimsical attempts to make it look cheerful before allowing his gaze to drift out to the twinkling lights of the city at dusk. It was bound to be inevitable when he made the call to Itachi and told Jiraiya about this latest development. There was simply no other option left on the table when all possibilities were considered.

Their stay in Buk-gu was rapidly coming to an end.


	32. 32: Revealing Trails

**Notes:** Oh, why do I get the feeling I'm going to be skewered by the end of this chapter? *prepares to hide in underground bunker* All the same, my sincere thanks for all your wonderful feedback and comments on the previous one! I really do appreciate you taking the time to do so, despite some of your grievances or concerns. All I have to say is "KEEP HOPE ALIVE!" XD

Enjoy! And as always, your comments are my Gatorade! :D

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 32:<strong>

**Revealing Trails**

_On a mountain slope, _

_Solitary, uncompanioned,_

_Stands a cherry tree._

_Except for you, lonely friend,_

_To others I am unknown._

_**Abbot Gyoson**_

* * *

><p><em>Naruto:<em>

"I do know how to shave on my own, Haku," I complained though laughing as he brandished the shaving brush, like a weapon, before my face. We were in my tiny restroom, where he had somehow managed to balance himself on the sink (the guy must be light as a feather) without breaking it. He dipped the brush into the jar of the white gel-like stuff and motioned for me to turn my other cheek.

"It's no problem at all, Naruto-kun," he insisted with a warm smile. "I love to help. Now stay still."

I obeyed with a mock pout; forcing my gaze to remain on my reflection in the mirror – though it was blocked every now with Haku's head getting in the way as he expertly applied the cream to my whiskered skin. You have no idea how good it feels to get a shave after going a few days without it. Maybe I'm a special case because my hair/whiskers tend to itch if I don't take care of it on time.

That aside, it was a struggle not to look into those brown eyes (they were so damn close after all), or for a part of my mind not to realize that those slightly parted lips were within kissing distance. If anyone was to come in now, they'd probably get the wrong idea and considering I had just about told Haku that what transpired in the bathroom wasn't going to happen again, I couldn't help wondering if he was still thinking I was going to cave in with situations like these.

Still, I chided myself for thinking so negatively about his intentions. He has been nothing but his usual jovial, friendly and helpful self since I returned. He hadn't offered to join me in the bathroom, and while I was there, he was busy cleaning up my apartment and making a quick dinner for me (or rather just warming up something Temari had already prepared). He hadn't come across as too flirtatious and had eagerly asked about training; wanting to know every single thing I've been doing with Sergei all this time. I was careful not to give away the arguments and fights I had with the Russian. I figured he would have guessed most of my wounds and bruises weren't just from learning how to shoot a gun, which lessened the obvious queries. It didn't deter from the fact that I had many a-query of my own for him.

However, I got the feeling he wasn't letting me do that, for whenever I thought I had the opportunity to slip in my question about his relationship with his master recently, he'd chime in with another topic altogether. I sighed inwardly and allowed him to talk as much as he wanted; obediently following his commands as he carefully used the razor to finish the task.

When he was finally through, I looked like a new man – well except for the band-aids and bruises on my right cheek and temple that was yet to completely heal.

"Not bad," I praised as I rubbed my chin in appreciation as the sharp scent of the aftershave filled the air while he rinsed off the razor and other supplies used. "Maybe I should hire you permanently to do this...if your master doesn't mind that is."

I was quick to notice the slight flinch he gave, and I winced inwardly. So I was right after all. He and Sasuke must have had an argument over the shit that happened, which would mean I'd have to go apologize and explain things to Sasuke ASAP. I mean, it wasn't really Haku's fault to begin with. If I hadn't kissed him, the poor guy wouldn't have gotten the wrong idea which led to the other stuff.

_Damn it. _

"Hey, Haku," I began, not even sure where to begin. "Is everything all right with...hey!"

He had thrown himself upon me so suddenly; I promptly went into panic mode assuming he had passed out or worse. However, when I realized his arms were tightening around my neck, and he was still somehow balanced on the sink, the panic subsided...but only for so long.

"Haku?" I asked tentatively. I tried not to shiver in response as I felt his warm breath tickle my neck. I grit my teeth and tried to think of the most horrendous things (say Sergei for example), while doing my best to ignore Haku's tender, almost feather-like, kisses now being placed –

_Whoa! Slow down now. I know it feels like it's been ages since I got any, but –_

"Please," came the barely audible words that seared right through my heart at the ache within them. "Just let me hold onto you like this for a while, Naruto-kun. I beg you."

How do you say "no" to a plea like that? How could I push him away when I could hear the sadness and tears in that voice? In silent resignation, I closed my eyes and cradled him to me; pressing my hand gently against the back of his head to hold him steady. With the other, I caressed his shoulders with slow circles, not sure of what else I could do to ease the turmoil he must be going through. Knowing Sasuke, he must have really said some hurtful things to Haku or shut him out like he did to me. What's worse is that he's known Haku longer than I have, so their relationship should hold more weight and mean so much more to him. Why would Sasuke be so quick to break it off? So what if I was a little jealous at first about how close they were? I guess it's only because I –

(envied them)

"I'm sorry," I finally croaked miserably. "It's all my fault. If I hadn't started that...I mean kissed you in the bathroom, you wouldn't be in this mess right now with Sasuke." I sighed heavily. "Listen, let me talk to him, okay? I'll explain and confess everything. He shouldn't be upset with you over it."

"No..." He sniffled and finally lifted his head. I did tell you seeing Haku all miserable made me feel pretty bad inside, didn't I? This moment is no different. You really do get the urge to hug him tight and never let go. There was a tremulous smile on his flushed visage, and I could only remain helplessly frozen as he slowly reached up to cup my cheeks between his warm palms. "You don't need to do anything, Naruto-kun. Sasuke and I have already talked about it."

"Yeah, but it's all my -"

He shook his head and placed a finger against my lips to silence me. "It's _not_ your fault, Naruto-kun. It's something that's been building up for a while anyway, and what happened in the bathroom made me happier than you could ever imagine."

"...what do you mean?"

His cheeks were dusted a pretty hue of pink as he lowered his gaze shyly. "My feelings for you, Naruto-kun. From the moment I met you, I told myself that I was only interested because you were different from the other sinners I had seen and spoken to at Byaku-Shinkyou. I told myself that it was only because of Sasuke-sama's interest in you and why you were such a 'bother' to him compared to the others. However, I saw that inner light and spirit within you, so strong...so beautiful...unlike anything I had ever experienced before. I wanted Sasuke-sama to experience that light as well, and I was so glad to see that he was willing to listen and open his heart just a little bit to let you in. I truly believed, in my heart, that you'd be the one to remind Sasuke-sama of his humanity, and I did all I could to make you both realize how much you needed each other."

He sighed softly and lifted his gaze to me again. It was hard to describe the expression in those eyes; whether it was sadness, pity, anger, frustration or admiration, I had no idea. But damn if my heart wasn't pounding like a jack hammer within my chest as I listened to him.

"I was doing my best to be a matchmaker," he finally continued in that same quiet tone, his fingertips absently tracing the outline of the scars on my cheeks. "Telling myself that you were nothing more than a friend to me and that was all I would be satisfied with. However, coming here...to Buk-gu...made me realize that I was only bottling up my real feelings. I came to realize that a small part of me actually liked to see you two argue and not speak to each other, as it would give me an opportunity to endear myself to you even more. I wanted you to like me better than Sasuke-sama, to see me as more than just cute-little-Haku you tease all the time." He gave a small smile. "I told myself that was okay just as long as I made you smile and made you happy. And then...I had to see you both in the hallway that night."

His voice broke a little and he had to bite his lower lip to control himself. "It hurt more than I cared to admit, Naruto-kun. And yet I should have known it would be inevitable. You did what I had set out to do to Sasuke-sama. _You_ changed him in more ways than one. _You_ made him realize just how wonderful being with others could be. _You_ opened his eyes to the pleasures of being with another male...after all his response and overnight stay was more than enough to tell me everything. You should have seen him the day after, Naruto-kun. I have never seen Sasuke-sama look that..._content_ and I knew I wasn't the one responsible for it. It was _you_. _You_ are the one who managed to do something Orochimaru-sama and so many others have tried over the years including Asuma-san. I knew then that I was much too late, that even if I moved in to stake my claim and to confess to you...whatever you and Sasuke-sama shared that night would supersede whatever I could say or do.

"I was so jealous, Naruto-kun; so envious of him and I wanted to punish him in some way for being happy while I remained miserable. What happened in the bathroom was the perfect excuse, for my intention was to reveal it to him someday and to rub it in his face. After all, if it wasn't for his loathing of my love for Zabuza-san...perhaps he'd still be alive today. Perhaps I would have been happier knowing there was someone out there who really did feel for me like I did for him."

He took a deep breath and released me, but only to place his trembling hands on the sink and lower his gaze to the floor. "It's horrible of me to think like that, isn't it, Naruto-kun? That the sweet, innocent, nice Haku you know is capable of being so vindictive, right?" His lips quirked into a wry smile. "I am human, Naruto-kun, and as a human, I am more than capable of feeling the same emotions everyone else goes through. I might smile and act docile, but it doesn't stop my thoughts from racing or my mind to be filled with different ideas even malicious ones. Sometimes people tend to forget that because they see me as nothing more than a servant, even Sasuke-sama is guilty of that sometimes. No fault of his, it's just the way I've been "programmed" since I was a child. Always say "yes" to those in authority and never question them in public. I had no voice as a servant, and if I was hurt or angry about anything, I was never to show that to anyone. However, Sasuke-sama liberated me...a little. With him, I found I could talk a little more and be myself...well as much as I could be in the situation. However, life outside the walls of Byaku-Shinkyou really made me open up. You and Sasuke-sama and in some way, Shikamaru-san, have made me realize that I am whatever I choose to make of myself. I had to find my own voice and become my own person. And that is why..."

He paused and lifted his head to pin me with a look that seemed to sear right into my soul. I felt my cheeks flushing with heat as he broke into the most beautiful smile...and yet...a tear still escaped to trickle down his cheek.

"And that is why I can tell you this knowing full well you will never feel the same way for me."

_Oh God...no...please don't say it..._

"I love you, Naruto-kun."

I groaned and lowered my head; my knees trembling as the weight of his confession sank into my heart.

_Why me? Why me? I don't deserve you, Haku. I really don't, can't you see? You need someone who will take good care of you. Someone who isn't likely to get into trouble by just taking a foot outside. After all you've been through; you deserve a quiet and peaceful life with someone who will always be by your side. I cannot provide that for you, Haku. I am a wanderer and the life I am likely to live from now on is one that you most certainly do not need to be involved in. Besides, I was foolish enough to fall in love once before and look where that got me. It really isn't worth it._

"Haku..." I whispered, but was silenced as he wrapped his arms around my neck again in a hug; perhaps to comfort me because it sure as hell felt that way.

"It's okay, Naruto-kun," he murmured against my neck. "You don't have to say anything to that. I just had to get it out of my system, and I'm glad I did."

"But..."

"It's not fair?" he finished off with a weak laugh. "I know. Love is never fair, is it? I always knew I was going to be fighting a losing battle when it came to you, and it was made only worse with the fact that I'd have Sasuke-sama to contend with."

"Hey now," I protested with a firm shake of my head. "Don't get any ideas now. Sasuke and I are not like that, okay? He and I broke up...if you want to call it that. So there's nothing going on between us anymore. He's back to preaching about sin and me being a sinner and all that shit, so good riddance. I don't need to hear that all the time from him."

I realized my voice was rising and I was getting upset for some reason, so I took a deep breath to calm down. Though it still didn't erase the persistent image of Sasuke with that all too familiar expression of detachment and disdain. What was the point of getting pissed off over a chapter of my life I was likely to regret in the long run?

It took me some time to realize that Haku wasn't holding me as tight anymore. In fact, he had pulled back and was looking at me with an expression that was a mixture of amusement and sadness.

"Even you..."

"Even me what?" I asked with a raised brow.

Haku sighed and shook his head softly. "Karin-chan was right. You two really are more stubborn than you let on. It's obvious you're still upset over the 'break up', and yet you say you are glad it's over."

"I _am_ glad it's over," I insist with a light frown. "You weren't there that night. You didn't see the way he spoke to me like I was nothing more than a cockroach to squash. God, he just drives me nuts with the way he acts sometimes!"

"I think you two need to talk -"

"Like hell we are," I interrupted with a firm shake of my head. "And I'm glad you told me all this now since going to him would have made me look like a big and total fool -"

"But you were going to apologize to him, weren't you?"

"Not any more I'm not."

Haku took a deep breath, wiped his face with the sleeves of his kimono and sat up a little straighter with a somewhat stern expression on his visage. "Naruto-kun. Sasuke-sama might not show it, but what we did...it hurt him more than he wants to admit to you or me. I've known him long enough to realize that when he holds one at bay, it's to prevent himself from getting hurt again. Remember how I told you about the kind of life Sasuke-sama has lived? To get to the point where he's willing to let you _touch_ him let alone _kiss_ him...it means so much more to him than even he realizes."

I leaned against the wall and folded my arms across my chest. I could feel my brows furrowing in consternation. "For someone who just confessed his feelings to me, you're not doing too bad trying to get me to feel guilty by going back to him. What is this? Do you _want_ me to go to him? Do you want us to start up whatever the hell we had before?" I eyed him warily. "Isn't all this supposed to be bothering you? I thought you would be happy that we were no longer together, and now it seems like you're trying to make us hook up again. Damn it." I ran my fingers through my hair in growing frustration. "Which is it, Haku?"

"You should be asking yourself that, Naruto-kun," came the quiet answer that had me looking at him sharply. "I know it sounds like a contradiction, and trust me...everything I said earlier still stands true. It does hurt me to know that you two might be attracted to each other and have hidden feelings -"

"...don't think so -"

"...beneath this layer of indifference and nonchalance act -"

"If it bothers you that much, then nothing's happening between us. End of story."

I turned to leave - this conversation suddenly giving me a headache - when I felt the firm grip of his hand around my forearm.

"Let me go, Haku," I commanded quietly. "I really don't feel like talking about it anymore."

"I love and admire Sasuke-sama despite everything, Naruto-kun. I made a vow to him that his life would come first before mine, and I would still willingly die for him if occasion calls for it. The past few days have been very trying for me, and because I was so buried deep in my self-pity and misery, I …I might have put all our lives in jeopardy."

I stiffened at this nugget of information and eyed him warily. "What are you talking about?"

Holding my gaze steady, he continued with a bittersweet smile. "I met someone; someone I thought would be a friend and, for a while, a possible replacement for you if things went well between us. However, I've come to realize that this person had taken me for a fool and was nothing more than a spy sent by Orochimaru-sama to gather information about us. Though I gave away nothing personal, this person was smart enough to figure things out and has probably betrayed us."

I could feel my blood chilling at the knowledge that all this time..._all this time_ I was away with Sergei, someone had been keeping tabs on us; using Haku as bait and who knew? Right now at this very moment Orochimaru and his minions could be hot on our tail while we sat here doing nothing to prepare ourselves for a possible attack.

_Shit!_

"Haku, listen -"

"You don't need to tell me what a big mistake I've made, Naruto-kun," Haku admitted with a nod of his head. "Even Karin-chan warned me, but I was too stubborn to admit that Sai could be -"

"Wait...did you say _Sai_?"

Haku nodded as I tried to ransack my brain on why that name sounded so damn familiar –

"Sasuke-sama said he was the same person who alerted Jiraiya-sama on the night you were attacked by thugs."

"Son-of-a-bitch!" I growled as I pounded a fist against the wall. It was all slowly falling into place. If it was true that this Sai was a spy, then it was likely he already knew about us and was probably just lying in wait for an opportunity to strike. It was just a damn lucky break that Jiraiya had stopped into the hotel/host club the guy was working at. How convenient for that pale-faced asshole! I had to call Jiraiya immediately to let him know about this. If we could stop this guy before he made any other moves –

"Wait, Naruto-kun!" Haku cried out and blocked my path as I headed toward the door. "Please don't do anything rash. I have to really certify that he is a spy and Sasuke-sama has suggested I see him one more time just to make sure. If I suddenly stopped seeing him, he'll begin to suspect something and then we really might be in trouble."

"He could have others working with him," I replied tautly. "We can't risk you going alone. Someone should be with you just in case -"

"You forget I do know how to take care of myself in a fight," Haku interrupted with a firm shake of his head. "Besides, as I said, we had plans for a quiet lunch tomorrow. I do not plan to give him any idea that I already know who and what he is." He placed his hands on my arms as if to hold me steady; a small smile on his visage. "To atone for my lack of judgment and probably endangering all of us, I have to do this, Naruto-kun. In your case, you must promise me you'll speak to Sasuke-sama as soon as you can. Do you have to meet up with Sergei tomorrow?"

I prepared to lie, saying I did though Sergei had (mercifully) decided our training was officially over. He had taught me everything he possibly could in the short time we spent together; the rest was going to be up to me and hopefully Jiraiya. My plan had been to spend the entire day sleeping and eating like crazy, but with this news about Sai, I knew it was going to be spent tailing Haku and seeing what he and Sai would be up to. I knew the date was going to be nothing more than a reconnaissance mission of sorts, but I was still of the mindset that we ought to take him out while we still had the chance. With Sai gone, we could at least nip the problem in the bud.

(But is it too little too late? This all depends on how long Sai's been here, how much he knows, and how much information he's delivered to Snake Dude. What if there are others with him? And if there are...just how many are they? Where would they be? Have they been living in this building all this time without our knowledge?)

"..ruto-kun?"

I forced myself to the present and watched the face before me for a long minute before giving a slow nod. "I'm done with Sergei," I finally admitted. "So...only Sasuke knows about this, right?"

He nodded. "Yes. Karin-chan has her doubts, but I haven't yet told her the full story. I think Sasuke-sama did everyone else about the possibility of a spy being around, but they do not know who it is. Please promise you'll keep it a secret until I return."

I opened my mouth to protest, but the desperate plea in his eyes had me groaning in resignation. "Fine. Fine. I won't say anything to the others. What time do you leave for this date anyway?"

"I promised to meet him at the park around eleven in the morning. I don't know how long we'll be, but I'll definitely call and leave a message with Jae Weong or speak to one of you when I'm about to come home."

"Not a second too late, got it?" I grumbled.

"And you will keep your promise?"

I raised a brow. "What promise was that again? If you mean the not telling anyone else, I already told you -"

"No. Speaking to Sasuke-sama."

My jaw worked for a second. I hated to admit that the prospect of seeing that guy again and having a decent conversation with him (what the hell would we talk about anyway?) was making me damn anxious all of a sudden. Which Sasuke would I meet? The one who shut me out or the one Haku insists is actually human and capable of being hurt?

(at least you owe him an apology. Get that out of the way and that's all there is to it)

"I promise," I muttered finally with a mock pout. "You do realize this is some serious punishment you're putting me through, don't you?"

Haku chuckled weakly and gave me a brief but hard hug. "I know, Naruto-kun, but you both need to get this out of your system. If it does turn out that there really is no hope for anything more than friendship between you two...will you consider me then?"

I felt my heart sink. "Haku..."

"I know, I know," he interrupted with a soft laugh. "Wishful thinking. You cannot see me as anything more than a good friend."

"You do deserve to find someone who won't be a jerk to you," I said quietly. "I honestly thought you and Sasuke were...I mean that the two of you would kinda be together when all of this was over and done with."

"Once upon a time I did entertain that idea," Haku confessed with a wistful smile. "But...Sasuke-sama and I can never be lovers. It would not work out."

"Why not?"

Haku pursed his lips in thought. "I really don't know how else to explain it in words, Naruto-kun. He's like a...I don't want to say 'brother', but it's almost something like that...but deeper. It's...complicated." He finished with a shrug and sheepish expression on his visage. "Same like you in a way, I guess. I love you, but if I were to give you away...I'd want you to be by Sasuke-sama's side. I really think you're the only one who can 'control' him."

I would have snorted at the choice of words –

(me? 'Control' Sasuke? Yeah right.)

...but when I noticed Haku wasn't kidding about it, I looked away and scratched the back of my head. "Yeah, well...don't want you to get your hopes up too much. As you said, nothing might come out of this. I'm really not looking for a relationship with anyone right now. Sakura was more than enough for me."

"Sasuke-sama is not Sakura."

I smirked lightly. "You don't have to remind me of that. Still...you know what I mean. Falling in love or giving my heart away to anyone...I don't see it happening anytime soon."

He bit his lower lip and seemed to watch me for a long time until I was this close to screaming for him to knock it off. He eventually broke into another small smile and nodded. "If you say so, Naruto-kun. Besides, you have a very important mission ahead. It will definitely not do for you to get too involved with anyone at this time."

"I might not return," I stated flatly, and the immediate flash of sadness in his eyes made me ashamed of my blunt assessment of my dangerous future. However, I was definitely not prepared for the soft kiss he placed on my forehead or the gentle squeeze of my hand.

"You will survive, Uzumaki Naruto," came the quiet words whispered into my ear. "People like you just don't know how to die."

He pulled away and released me reluctantly; leaving me flustered and confused as to what his cryptic words meant.

"Try to get plenty of rest, Naruto-kun," he was saying as he made his way to the door. "And don't worry about me. I'm much stronger than you give me credit for."

"Just promise me you'll be careful," I insisted, trying hard to eliminate the part of me that felt I was probably seeing him for the last time. "If I don't hear from you by three o'clock, I'm coming after you. Got it?"

Tears filled his eyes, but he lowered them quickly as if to prevent me from seeing his emotions and giving a quick bow. "Thank you, Naruto-kun," came the barely audible words of sincere gratitude. "Thank you so much for caring about me."

He would be out the door before I could say anything else, and in the deafening silence that proceeded his departure, I knew without a doubt that sleep would be a long time coming tonight.

* * *

><p><em>Haku:<em>

_I am loved._

Smiling softly to himself, he hopped over a puddle of murky water and continued his leisurely walk down the busy sidewalk. He gripped the strap of the black bag draped across his chest and peered into windows of some of the stores he passed by; unable to resist the draw of brightly decorated displays and shelves filled with delectable treats.

_I have a family who loves and cares for me._

He had chosen to be in Western wear today; looking like any other teenager on a Sunday afternoon outing. Blue jeans, a black and red striped sweatshirt, white sneakers and a baseball cap to finish things up; Haku could blend into any scene without drawing too much attention to himself. Karin, despite her injury, had taken the time to braid his hair, which now fell down his back like a rope, but he would have been a fool not to have noticed some of the appreciative glances he had received from both sexes so far. Ah, if only Karin was with him right now, she'll probably cling to him as usual and do her best to make everyone else jealous. He giggled into his hand at the memory of the last time she did that; pretending they were dating as they shared a large malt drink at a small café nearby and she all but drooled all over him as if completely smitten.

However, the giggles subsided as he came to a stop before a bridal shop and recalled his brief but enlightening meeting with the woman earlier. He had been alarmed to see her shin bandaged and even more despondent when she revealed what had taken place after he left the laundromart. In his heart, he really wanted to believe that Sai had simply been walking by when the incident happened, but the scenario seemed all too perfect...just too convenient.

(like the meeting with the thugs)

Sai must have planned it all from the beginning in an attempt to get Karin and Temari's approval. Haku could see how and why he'd do something like that, but at the expense of getting Karin injured? That was simply inexcusable!

He was so engrossed in his thoughts that he failed to notice the dark expression on his visage, the tightening fists he was forming or the hard biting of his lower lip until one of the shop owners knocked on the glass to get his attention. Haku looked up with a jerk; blushing in embarrassment as the woman gave him a bemused yet disdainful look. She shooed him away; assuming he was nothing more than a wandering kid considering stealing something. With a quick bow of his head, he spun on his heels and dashed across the street; not stopping until he saw the park in his sights.

10:45am

He was early, but it would give him enough time to prepare himself for their meeting.

(or perhaps he's already here...watching me)

He sat on a bench and closed his eyes; allowing the sounds of children playing by the pond, grown-ups walking past with muffled whispers and cheerful laughter, as well as the cacophony of passing cars and trucks, to fade into nothing. It was easy to dissolve into this world of meditative silence with just the right amount of concentration. In here it was easy to weed out what was important and what wasn't; to isolate each sound and to focus on what you needed to hear. In this abyss, he would be able to tell when Sai arrived; for though his mind might have been focused on other things during their last few meetings, Haku's senses were now accustomed to Sai's scent and even the way he walked; noiseless yet distinct.

_I am loved._

Within the darkness, he could see their faces fading in and out; their concerned voices melting like warm syrup within his heart.

There was Naruto-kun with his incessant demands that Haku call him immediately the date was over or he would come barging in to rescue him should things go wrong.

There was Karin-chan hugging him tightly and saying that she would be by the phone all day waiting for his call should anything happen.

And there was Sasuke-sama, who had been silent for the most part while Haku dressed this morning, but had given his firm but concerned advice:

"Be alert at all times, Haku. Remember not to give anything away and as soon as there's trouble, please do not attack or start up a fight. We do not know if there are others with him and you risk getting ambushed if you do anything out of the ordinary." And in a very uncharacteristic move; something that had brought the tears to Haku's eyes and even threatened to do so now, Sasuke had hugged him quickly and placed a firm kiss upon his head.

"Call us."

"I will, Sasuke-sama. I will."

_I am loved by all of them. In their own way, they care for me. All my life, I thought I was nothing more than a tool to be used and would never find anyone to care for me as a human being. I thought Kimimaro-sama loved me, but he proved me wrong in the end. I met Zabuza-san and for the first time felt that my life would be complete. Sasuke-sama showed me what it was to be strong and to believe in myself, and just when I thought he'd be the only one I could rely on, I now have Naruto-kun, Karin-chan, Shikamaru-san, Temari-chan, and even Itachi and Shisui-san. I have a new life with people that I can share it with, and I'll be damned if I let you take that away from me, Sai._

He lifted his lashes and eyed his watch.

11:05am

Sai was five minutes late. Haku lowered his gaze to his lap and strained his senses. He could not feel Sai anywhere, and a part of him wondered if the other man was not going to show up at all. It hadn't exactly been a 'set' date, since Haku had loosely promised Sai that he 'might' show up today if he had nothing to do.

With a light shrug, he dug into his bag for the manga he had picked up the other day at a bookstore. It was a thrilling tale of samurais and princesses, and it reminded him so very much of his favorite Korean drama. It was unfortunate he couldn't buy all fourteen volumes, so he had to settle for only getting the first five for now.

However, distraction came again as he ruminated over his conversation with Naruto last night. He was glad he had finally been able to tell the blond how he felt, and it really did feel like a heavy burden had been lifted off his shoulders. He had expected Naruto's response and, to be honest, had really not felt as devastated as he had imagined he'd be. Unfortunately, what had made things a little difficult were Naruto's genuine remorse and still obvious concern and care he had for Haku despite it all.

Haku knew he had put both men in a difficult situation, but he sincerely hoped Naruto would keep his promise and speak to Sasuke sometime today. He had no idea what would come out of their discussion, but for all their sakes, Haku prayed they would come to a compromise that would make their relationship as un-cumbersome as it had been before their emotions got the best of them.

_If nothing else...at least be friends again -_

"Sorry I'm late. My bus was a little slow this morning."

Haku cursed inwardly and closed the book; turning around to notice Sai standing behind the bench with that all-too-familiar smile on his visage. Unlike his usual black Chinese-style garb, Sai was dressed in similar fashion to Haku, only instead of a sweat shirt; he was clad in a long-sleeved white shirt with the words 'METAL HEAD' written in black upon it. Like Haku, he too had a bag which usually contained his drawing materials –

_Is that really all,_ Haku thought ruefully as he allowed a warm smile to come to his visage while rising to his feet. _What secrets do you hide behind that smile, Sai? Or should I say...Shin-chan? How could you...lie to me?_

"I was going to leave without you," he said aloud with a mock pout.

"Not with you reading that boring book," Sai teased as he reached out to snatch the manga from Haku's grip. "What's this? _Vagabond_? A samurai story? How lame."

"Hey! Give it back!" Haku cried out as he tried to retrieve it. Laughing, Sai stepped away from him and danced out of reach.

"Come and get it, if you want it," he said playfully while waving it above his head, only to nearly get tackled to the ground as Haku just about leapt gracefully over the bench to seize the book.

"I win!" Haku said with his tongue stuck out. "Now you get to...mmmphff!"

His eyes widened in shock and pure disbelief at the sudden (and definitely not unpleasant) sensation of Sai's lips against his. The kiss was so unexpected that Haku hadn't the time to prevent Sai's tongue from slipping in to caress his in a way that sent a jolt of adrenaline racing down his spine.

_Oh…my…_

When Sai finally pulled away –

(the kiss had only lasted less than a minute, but to Haku, it felt like his entire life had flashed before his eyes)

...there was a dark blush on his cheeks and he looked ashamed of what he had done.

"I'm...sorry," he stuttered with a gentle scratch of his nose. "I just couldn't resist especially when you looked at me like that. I apologize. It was too bold of me. I'll understand if you didn't want to see me again."

Haku realized his mouth was still open and he snapped it shut, while struggling to make sense of just what had taken place as well as the rush of heat that was making his face feel too damn hot.

_Remember. It is all a trick. He's doing this to throw you off. Remain focused!_

"It's all right," Haku finally said with a smile as he bent to pick up the book that had slipped from his fingers. "Just...next time, let me know ahead of time, okay? I really don't like being taken by surprise like that."

"So you're not mad at me?" Sai asked; his features positively beaming with hope. Haku felt sick to his stomach, but tossed the book into his bag and sighed inwardly.

Damn it. This was going to be one very long day.

"I mean it," he said aloud and wrapped an arm around Sai's. "Come on, let's go already. I'm starving. You're paying today, right?"

Sai blushed and nodded. "Yep! I know the perfect place we can have lunch. It's right off..."

And as he continued speaking in earnest, both men failed to notice the watchful pair of eyes following them every step of the way.

* * *

><p><em>Naruto:<em>

So I lied. Sue me.

Did you really think I'd be content sitting at home while Haku was out with some guy that might end up killing him once the orders were given? No way was I going to sit back and do nothing. If there was even the slightest hint of trouble, I was going to barge in and –

"What the hell do you think you're doing?"

I froze and lowered the binoculars; my heartbeat kicking up a notch in what I assumed was due to being taken by surprise and not because it was -

_Of all the people in the world to see now. Fuck!_

I looked over my shoulder and sure enough it was _him_. Standing above me with that same condescending expression on his visage. I noticed he was without his crutches and was dressed just like me...well casual wear I mean. His hands were buried within the pockets of his pants, and the baseball hat on his head as well as the over-sized dark sunglasses made him look a little ridiculous. Except I might be looking at a mirror-version of myself. I was wearing a baseball hat and sunglasses too. Trying to be incognito and all.

"What are you doing here yourself?" I retorted back, trying to hide the binoculars I had been spying on Haku with. I rose to my feet (I had been hiding behind a clump of bushes all this time) and tried to look as dignified as possible. "I thought you would be back -"

"Get down," he suddenly ordered in a harsh whisper, while placing a hand on my shoulder and forcing me back to my haunches. He crouched beside me as well, and just in time too because Sai and Haku were making a turn around the corner and approaching our hiding place. We could hear their banter and soft laughter (wasn't exactly sure what they were saying), but it was enough to tell us they were not about to get into a fight anytime soon.

Sasuke and I however –

"They've gone," I hissed and shrugged his hand off my shoulder. "Damn it. We might miss them now."

I tried to sit up to see better, but damn if Sasuke didn't get in my way again.

"What the fuck are you -?"

"Shut up," he commanded tightly. "You're too goddamn loud. Looks like they're going into the museum."

Not waiting to see if I was following him or not, he stepped over me and began to make his way across the street. Cursing beneath my breath, I strode after him while tucking away the binoculars into my bag. Goddamn it. Can't believe he's here too. I mean what gives? Did he follow me? Or is he just as concerned as I am for Haku? Probably the latter, though it would have been nice to know someone was watching me just as I had been watching them all this time.

So far Haku and Sai had done pretty ordinary things; really nothing to write home about. After meeting at the park, they went to a café that just opened up a few blocks down the street and spent almost an hour in there. They had come out laughing and chattering like kids, and I hated to admit that seeing them look so..._comfortable_ in each other's presence reminded me of the dates I used to have with Sakura. So what if I had told Haku that I wasn't looking to be in another relationship anytime soon, that didn't mean it wouldn't be nice to share a cup of malt with someone you really liked –

"Hold on," came the voice to jar my thoughts. "We have to pay for tickets. Looks like there's a special showing or something."

"But I don't want to visit a museum," I protested. "Why don't we just stay out here until they come out?"

He gave me a look as if I had just stepped out of his nightmares and then shrugged. "You can wait out here if you like. I'm going in."

_Why you...!_

For a guy who refused to speak to me the other day, he sure was acting like he was in charge of this little operation all of a sudden. Who was he to tell me what to do?

He paid for this ticket at the window, and again, without waiting to see if I was following him or not, he joined the throng of visitors walking into the building. I hastened to the window.

"Uh...a ticket please?" I asked in Japanese, when it was finally my turn, though I made a hand signal of my intent. The vendor looked quizzical and then to my chagrin, pointed to a sign that could be translated to 'SOLD OUT' if I could read Korean. I heard the groan behind me from another customer and my worst fears were confirmed.

_Shit!_

Just my luck that he'd have to purchase one of the last few tickets. Well, at least one of us would keep an eye on Haku in there, so I could rest a little easy. I walked over to a bench beneath a cluster of trees next to what looked like statues of famous Korean leaders and soldiers. Sitting down, I knew I couldn't relax for I was still not sure if we were followed by Sai's cohorts. I pretended to read a brochure I had snagged from the stand next to the museum's entrance, while observing the people around me. There were your typical couples engrossed with one another, some children running around the large fountain, some elderly folks sitting like me and reading or dozing off under the sun. No one looked suspicious, but then again...looks could be deceiving.

I decided to kill time by walking around the building and scouring the grounds, now thinking of Haku's words to me last night, especially having to speak to the very person who ditched me earlier. The plan was to follow Haku for a while then return to the apartment in time to have the chat with Sasuke and then join Karin in waiting for his phone call. However, with Sasuke here now...I'm not so sure if that talk will be going as easily as I planned. I still didn't know what the hell I was going to say besides apologizing for the bathroom incident. It's not as if I'm going to invite him or beg him for us to continue messing around with each other _that way_. If he was through with it, then I'd just have to suck it up and move on with my life.

Except I'd be lying right through my fucking teeth.

_I missed it. _

I missed _every_ damn thing about it. The touching. The kissing. The fondling. The panting. The gasps. The caresses...and did I forget to mention the kissing? I wanted to feel that guy beneath me or above me again. I wanted to see him look vulnerable or in control, to see those features flushed with heat, those eyes darken with passion, to taste the sweat off his skin...to bite that skin until he cried out for mercy. I wanted to hear those sounds he made when he was close to coming and when he did actually come, to feel his arms around me while our bodies shuddered and tried to recover from our orgasms. I wanted to hear his steady breathing as he grew closer to sleep and to cradle him next to me just as he did fall asleep.

_Cuddling...I want to cuddle the guy. How pathetic am I? _

I sighed and kicked at a pebble on the ground. Haku was right after all. I really had no idea just what I wanted. On the one hand, I was pissed at being dismissed so quickly, but when it came down to the basics, I still _wanted_ the bastard. Knowing that Haku felt so strongly for me made my wanting Sasuke more depressing. I didn't know how I'd be able to look at Sasuke and imagine wanting to touch him without thinking about Haku and how he was probably feeling. Though with the way he and Sai have been acting today, you'd never believe those two were 'not friends' in reality.

/I met someone; someone I thought would be a friend and, for a while, a possible replacement for you if things went right between us. /

Man, this sucks.

I sat on a stone ledge and lowered my head in thought. If only this Sai wasn't the bad guy in all this, maybe it would have been my turn to play matchmaker and get those two to hook up. I mean, watching them all this time, they had such good chemistry together. I have never seen Haku look so happy or laugh so much in an outing and even though I'm sure he was supposed to be acting...it didn't look like he was pretending either. Same went for Sai. For a guy who Karin had mentioned was calculated (I had spoken to her this morning), when with Haku, he didn't look as if he could hurt a fly. If anything Sai looked like he was constantly on a high when with Haku; always doing things to please the guy no matter what.

_He looks like he's in love...or at least acts that way...or maybe he really is and doesn't know it, but because of the job he feels he's got to act like a bastard and betray us._

A shadow fell over me and I looked up sharply.

"What happened?" I asked when I saw who it was. "Why are you out already?"

"The show's over," Sasuke replied with a light shrug and a slight nod toward the front of the building. I stood up and looked as well; noticing the crowd spilling out into the afternoon sunshine with excitement on their faces. Looked like it was a good show...whatever it was. I could just make out Sai and Haku leaving as well, though they had stopped for something. On closer inspection, Sai was crouched helping Haku to re-tie the laces of his sneakers; a scene that had something hard twist in my chest for some reason.

"They were stuck to each like glue throughout the whole thing," Sasuke was saying quietly beside me as he too watched the couple. "Sickening if you ask me."

_Hmm…someone sounds jealous…_

He snorted and then spun on his heels to walk away.

I blinked in disbelief. "Hey! Where are you going? The date isn't over yet."

"I'm done watching," he replied with a wave of his hand over his head. "I've seen all I need to. You can continue if you want. I'm going home."

"At least let's grab something to eat," I blurted out before I realized just what I had said. However, with my stomach immediately growling, I blushed and gave a sheepish smile. "Eh...if you want, that is."

He looked like he was about to blow me off, but when his stomach gave a growl as well, I smirked in victory. "Hehe, lunch it is then."

"You're paying," he mumbled as led the way (again!)

"Fine...whatever," I muttered with a roll of my eyes.

I won't bother trying to explain why seeing his lips quirk into a semblance of a smile made my stomach all funny inside.

* * *

><p>We ended up following them anyway.<p>

I sucked hard on the straw; my gaze torn between watching Haku and Sai playing video games in the lower level of the (rather kick ass) arcade and studying the way Sasuke OCDs over his fries. He seems to have a problem grabbing more than one at a time to eat them, insisting on picking each individual fry, dipping it into the ketchup, and chewing it slowly. Man, at this rate, we could be here a while. I was almost done with my burger (the fries were long gone), but he wasn't even halfway through with his yet!

"You are killing me," I finally groaned with a mock slam of my head upon the table. "You eat slower than a grandma without teeth."

"Fuck you too," he replied though I could detect the embarrassment in his voice. "I don't go about wolfing down my food like an animal."

"Hey, watch how you insult me, you dick."

He opened his mouth to say something about me, but seemed to reconsider and settled for giving me the finger. I was just about to reciprocate the gesture when Haku's distinct cry of excitement had us turning simultaneously. The arcade was full of young people and because evening was fast approaching, the atmosphere was one of barely suppressed raging hormones and the promise of promiscuity long after the 'adults' were gone.

"He looks like a fucking kid," I mumbled as we watched him clap his hands in delight while Sai pretended to be despondent. "Never seen him smile this much before. Are you sure you told him to pretend?"

"I told him to act normal," Sasuke replied. I couldn't read what he was thinking, but I suspect there was a hint of sadness in those eyes. Perhaps seeing what Haku would have been without him - how 'normal' his servant would be without the shackles of obligation and duty - must be weighing on Sasuke's mind.

"Hey..." I began quietly. "He...eh...he still loves you, you know."

Sasuke glanced at me with a raised brow as if not sure of what I was getting at. I wasn't sure either, but what the hell. I've started and I might as well finish it.

"He really cares about you is what I wanted to say," I explained with a small smile. "He wouldn't do anything to hurt you and uh...about what happened between us..."

"I don't think this is the time or place to be discussing this," he began, but I wasn't going to let this one pass so easily.

"Actually this is a great time because I might get cold feet and never say it again." I took a deep breath and tried to shut out the noise around me, though it was a bit hard to do so. It was so loud in here with the music and all. "I'm sorry," I said aloud; hoping he'd hear me over the din of the laughing and chatting teenagers around us.

"I'm sorry," I repeated again; holding those dark eyes prisoner as I felt something weird stir within me again. "What happened between Haku and I was my fault. I initiated things and was too curious to know how it would progress from there. I had no idea he had those kinds of feelings for me, and I hated knowing I was giving him the wrong idea by kissing him first."

I lowered my gaze to the table and doodled absently on the napkin with a stray fry from my tray. "I guess what I'm saying is...I don't blame you for getting upset with me. Looking back now, I realize how much of a dick I was for going behind your back...but I did want to tell you about it! It's just...Haku made me promise not to tell you and I didn't want to hurt him either. Heh...ended up hurting you two anyway."

I dared to look up to see if I still had his attention, and I swear the expression on his face was enough to have a flood of heat rush up from the tips of my toes to the roots of my hair. I almost couldn't breathe for a minute and it was damn embarrassing to realize I was now sporting a rapidly growing boner in my pants.

_Notgoodnotgoodnotgoodnotgood! Goddamnit! Think of something else...something horrible...something..._

(isn't he going to say anything? This silence is killing me!)

"Uum...so...yeah...that's all I wanted to say," I mumbled and sucked on my straw again; forcing my gaze to the happy couple below, who could give two shits about us up here.

"Ah..." I noticed the time on the large clock next to the exits, just as Haku seemed to be telling Sai something important. "Looks like he's about to make the call to the apartment."

Luckily, I could finally feel Sasuke's penetrating gaze off me as he turned to observe Haku leaving the room and Sai behind. As if on cue, we sat up a little more to study Sai's actions. He was back on his side of the video games, idly toying around with the controls while sucking on a lollipop. His expression was one of content. In fact, it looked as if –

"Yoonsung?"

I nearly gave myself whiplash as I heard my Korean name from a familiar voice. Standing beside our table with a fellow girlfriend (who was just as pretty) was Yoona. I cursed inwardly at having taken off my disguise earlier, because it was somewhat dim up here (except for the neon flashes that went off every now and then), so it was no surprise she was able to recognize me.

"Yoo...Yoona," I greeted with a wan smile. "What are you doing here?"

"Hanging out," came the icy reply. Huh? What did I do to her? I realized that she wasn't smiling, and her hands were crossed before her chest in that familiar pose Sakura was prone to when she was pissed or about to have a 'serious' talk with me.

"What are _you_ doing here, Yoonsung? Shouldn't you be with your girlfriend? Or maybe she's here?"

She looked about her, while I looked as confused as fuck. I glanced at Sasuke for help, but he was ignoring us; his gaze still trained on Sai though I had a feeling he was deliberately leaving me to fend for myself. Cruel bastard!

"Look, I don't know what you're talking about," I tried to appease her quickly. "But I don't have a girlfriend."

"I don't believe you," she insisted with a huff. "That friend of yours told me you had one."

"Friend...?"

"The one I saw with you at the festival that night. I met him the other day on the street and asked about you, and guess what? He told me you already had a girlfriend on the side!"

"Did he now?" I glared at Sasuke's profile, but all he did was lower his cap to cover his eyes, while continuing to watch Sai. The son-of-a...!

"My _friend_ was only making things up," I replied through gritted teeth. "I assure you I do not have a -"

"I don't want to hear it, you liar! All you Japanese boys are the same! You come over here to take advantage of us, is that it?"

"Yeah!" Her friend chimed in like a programmed robot; looking righteously indignant.

"But I'm not like any other..." I began to make my case, but damn if the girl didn't suddenly reach for Sasuke's cup to fling its contents against my face and chest. Ice cubes fell into my shirt and had me nearly crying out in irritation (and it was freaking cold by the way), but remembered that the last thing I wanted to do was cause a scene. It would only attract unwanted attention (not that her little stunt hadn't garnered a few snickers and curious glances our way), but I had to stop this now before it got out of hand.

"Point taken," I replied with a forced smile. "Now if you'll excuse me. I have to go home and change."

* * *

><p>"That bitch! What the fuck is it with girls anyway?"<p>

Sasuke hung up the phone and stepped out of the filthy phone booth just in time to hear Naruto's muttered curse. They had long left the arcade, having decided that sticking around to deal with Yoona's issues was not going to be conducive. However, her interruption had forced them to leave before Sai and Haku, so as not to attract their attention. Still Sasuke had seen enough of the so-called 'date' to last him a life time. If he had to watch Sai act all love struck and in awe of Haku one more time, he was going to throttle the bastard personally.

"You seem to bring out the worst in them," Sasuke replied with an attempt to hide a smile at Naruto's distress. The blond had removed the over shirt and was now clad in just the flimsy white tee beneath that didn't do much to help considering it was a rather cool evening. "Maybe you should give them up altogether."

"You'd like that, wouldn't you?" came the sneer that brought a flood of color to Sasuke's cheeks; though he was glad for the fading light so Naruto wouldn't assume his response had caused the reaction.

"Why the hell did you tell her I had a girlfriend in the first place?"

_Because she is not worth your time or mine, _Sasuke thought bitterly.

"What difference does it make?" he replied instead. "Look how quick she was to insult you though you tried to make her listen. You should be thanking me for saving you from another Sakura clone."

Naruto opened and then shut his mouth, not quite sure how to respond to that. He hated to admit that Sasuke had a point…like he always did. _Damn._

"What did Karin say?" he asked to change the subject

"Haku did call and said he should be home by around nine. Gives us at least an hour to get back."

Naruto nodded and rose to his feet. "All right. I have no idea where the fuck we are, so you're going to have to get us the next bus going to our street."

"We can walk there," Sasuke replied with a shrug. Not that he didn't want to use a bus (his leg – though mostly healed – was now throbbing faintly) but he wanted to spend more time with Naruto and to formulate a better response to his apology at the arcade. There was something else he wanted to know, and the bus ride was not going to be beneficial to knowing the answer.

"Can your leg hold up?" Naruto asked with a glance thrown over his shoulder. He eyed said leg and raised a brow in silent query.

"I won't die anytime soon," Sasuke shot back. "Thanks for your concern."

"I just don't want to have to carry you, that's all. My back can't take it."

"Why? Because you're getting too old, or are you saying I'm too fat?"

"Guess which one, smartass."

"I knew you were a crotchety old coot. Where's your walker, old man?"

Naruto spun around to give him the middle finger; still walking backwards with a smirk on his features. "This old man will kick your ass all the way back to Byaku-Shinkyou. Better watch yourself, Uchiha Sasuke."

Sasuke snickered and kicked at a pebble that hit Naruto on the shin. "You watch yourself too, Uzumaki Naruto."

For that, he got two fingers in the 'fuck you very much' salutation which earned a reluctant chortle from his companion.

"Oh! A playground!" Naruto cried out suddenly as they made the turn and onto a quiet neighborhood they were not quite familiar with. The playground was empty except for a hobo fast asleep on a bench at the other end of it. Naruto leapt over a sand box, which still had some discarded bright-colored plastic buckets and spades buried within, to sit on the swing.

"Man, it's been years since I've been on one of these things," he admitted as he pushed off a little.

Sasuke remained frozen in place.

"What's wrong?" Naruto asked with a raised brow. "Never been on one of these before?"

Sasuke said nothing, but if the brief shift of his gaze was any indication, it was enough to tell Naruto everything.

"You kidding? How could you not have...? Ah...figures." There was a pregnant pause before Naruto continued with a smile. "Hey, it's not so bad. You saw the way Haku adjusted to all the games and stuff at the arcade and I'll bet he's never played them before. Swings are the same thing. Just sit on this thing here...and push off the ground like this...and then you keep pushing yourself forward like this...faster...and faster...and harder...and you can go higher..."

"...uum...Naruto..." Sasuke could hear the rather worrisome creak and groan of the equipment, but he might as well have been speaking to thin air for Naruto was literally –

(flying)

...airborne!

"Higher!" came the loud cry mingled with unbridled laughter that had Sasuke biting his lower lip at the sharp pang to fill his chest.

"Watch this!" Naruto cried out and to Sasuke's horror, it looked as if the guy was actually trying to stand upon the narrow wooden seat.

"Don't!" he screamed in panic. "You're going to fall!"

"Worrywart!" Naruto bellowed and swung even harder. The shirt he had tied around his waist flipped off with how hard he was swinging that it fluttered into the breeze like a feather before billowing back softly to earth upon a see-saw a few feet away. "This is fun, Sasuke! Come on!"

"You're joking."

"Chicken!"

"I am _not_ a chicken!"

"Then get on it!"

"I don't have a fucking death wish like you!"

"Cluck! Cluck! Cluuuuuuuuuuuck!"

"Knock it off!"

"Then get on the damn swing!"

"..."

With a muttered curse beneath his breath, Sasuke made his way to the other swing. He sat on it tentatively, and might as well have taken off with the way Naruto was literally swaying the equipment with every swing he took. He clutched the chains on either side tightly and as Naruto had instructed, gently pushed himself off the ground.

_There had been no swings at Byaku-Shinkyou._

He pushed off a little harder.

_No playgrounds of this sort while growing up. Playtime had required plenty of imagination with the toys his parents' bought him and Itachi's brilliant ideas. _

His feet left the ground.

_I could fly if I really wanted to, nii-san._

He closed his eyes and pictured his little self in his position. He could see the bright-eyed kid with the innocent smile and laughter happily swinging away with the precocious blond kid with the funny scars beside him. Naruto's adult laughter mingled with the child's, and Sasuke felt a hard lump in his throat with regret at what their current lives had denied them both in childhood. And still...knowing that Naruto could find the time to laugh despite his hardships and despite what was coming...

_How do you find the fucking strength to do it?_ he thought as he lifted his lashes and realized just how far off the ground he was now. The wind rushed through him with every motion back and forth, and the higher he went, the more weightless he felt. It literally did feel like flying and even when his baseball cap finally went adrift, Sasuke relished in the sensation of his hair whipping across his face.

"Feels good, doesn't it?" Naruto called out. "Try standing on it."

Sasuke was just about ready to say "no" but figured he might as well dare himself to go all the way. He did have to slow down a little, and praying he didn't do something stupid like falling flat on his face, he managed to balance himself on the narrow seat (wobbled a bit), but did get himself steady enough to –

"Bet you I can go higher!"

_Huh! _

He turned to Naruto with an incredulous expression, but the blond wasn't kidding. Naruto was clearly about to make this a challenge and Sasuke was not about to back down either.

"You are on," he sneered, and with a heave of his body upwards, he willed the swing to take him to heights never reached before.

A passerby could only stare in disbelief and bemusement at the sight of the teenage boys swinging with all their might on equipment that didn't look too safe, but at least they looked like they were having fun, so she wouldn't call the cops on them.

"I win!" Naruto panted as he swung back slowly to earth. "You know I won, Sasuke."

"Like hell you did," Sasuke gasped as he too began to slow down. Talk about a rush. He felt like every part of him was still soaring through the skies; every pore on his body opened with the exhilaration of flight. "I beat you fair and square!"

"I was literally almost over the fucking top of this thing!"

"That doesn't make a difference. If we had jumped off, I would have landed on the street."

"Then let's do that."

"What?"

"Swing so hard and jump off! The person who lands the furthest wins."

"...you're insane."

"Scared?"

"NO!"

"Then let's do it."

Sasuke eyed the space and distance before him. There was the sandbox, which would be a decent place to land, then there was the sidewalk but beyond that was nothing but asphalt and the probability of a waiting car just ready to cream them the moment they landed. This was clearly a suicide pact, and he was blindly going along with what Naruto was suggesting..._why_?

(because this is life with Naruto by my side. Always daring to do things you've never thought possible. Pushing yourself to think outside the damn box you've been locked in for so long. Doing the impossible and making it seem...effortless)

"Ready?" Naruto called out.

_..._

"Ready!" Sasuke yelled back and braced himself as he swung as hard and as far as he could. He could already feel the pain from landing upon his legs, and began to think of perhaps crouching or ducking or –

"On the count of three!" Naruto yelled. "One..."

_Dear God…give me strength._

"Two...!"

_Please don't let it be too painful!_

"I GIVE UP!"

Sasuke – who had been so geared and wired to leap off the swing – tumbled off it at the odd call and fell right into the sandbox with a hard thump.

"You son-of-a-bitch!" he roared as he heard Naruto's cackle of mirth. "You did that on purpose!"

"You think I want to die so soon?" Naruto replied as he jumped off the swing to reach out to Sasuke. "I'm still aching from Sergei's brand of teaching, man. I don't have the time to...ouch! What did you do that for?"

He was rubbing his forehead, where a plastic bucket had connected with seconds earlier. Sasuke staggered to his feet; his heart still racing at a mile a minute at his near death experience. He glared at Naruto as he walked past; his intention to head straight home, but his knees wouldn't corporate and he sat down heavily on the swing again.

"I hate you, you irrational crazy asshole," he muttered.

"...sorry," came the unexpected mumble of remorse that had Sasuke looking up with surprise. This was the second time Naruto was apologizing so quickly over something, and he was still to recover from the apology at the arcade. "I just thought it would be fun that's all."

"It _was_ fun," Sasuke agreed quietly. "Until you pulled that shitty stunt at the end."

Naruto sat upon the other swing with a small smile. "Still...it was good to hear you laugh. I think that's the first time I've really heard you do that."

Sasuke could feel his cheeks burning. _Laugh?_ When the hell had he done that?

"...so much fun," Naruto was saying.

"What?"

"I said you looked just like Haku today...having so much fun." Naruto gave him a shy smile before looking away with a shake of his head. "Never mind. I'm just rambling to myself."

Sasuke clutched the chains tightly and pushed himself off a little. He thought back to Haku throughout the day; recalling how happy and carefree his servant had been with Sai. It was hard to reconcile what they thought of Sai and what they had witnessed today. If it was indeed the same Shin he had known back in Byaku-Shinkyou, then it was likely that he was indeed one of Orochimaru's spies. Sasuke had never been told about the secret police, but Asuma had mentioned something like that one time. Sadly, Sasuke had been so blinded by his loyalty he refused to believe Orochimaru capable of doing something like that. To think that Sai could be pretending to this extent; worming his way into Haku's heart by playing the doting boyfriend...God, it made him so furious! Haku deserved to be with someone who wouldn't betray him, and since his heart was set on Naruto –

_Oh right…about that._

"Naruto?" he called out quietly, feeling his heart begin to beat a little faster as he struggled to phrase this in the right way. He didn't want to give Naruto the impression that he was jealous or desperate for his answer. "Back at the arcade...you mentioned something about knowing Haku's true feelings?"

"Ah...that..." Naruto sighed and kicked at some sand. "Yeah...last night we had a talk. Haku says he's...eh...well...in love with me..."

Sasuke stole a glance at his companion. He couldn't be sure but that tone of voice...

"Well?" he prodded when it seemed like Naruto wasn't going to speak again.

"Well what?" Naruto asked with a raised brow.

"Did you say "yes" or "no" to him?"

Naruto sighed again and scratched the back of his head. "I told him I couldn't return his feelings. It wasn't easy for me you know, and it still bugs me that he feels this way for me when -"

He froze; his cheeks turning a bright red as he realized what he had almost let slip out.

(...when I still want us to continue where we left off. I want us to get back together again, and I'm mighty worried because it's not just about the foreplay and messing around we do. It's all the other little things I'm beginning to notice.)

"Naruto?"

"What?" he snapped with more vehemence than he would have liked. "Sorr...sorry. I'm just a little stressed out right now."

"I understand," Sasuke replied with a soft nod. "Like you, I want Haku to be happy, but he seems to think you're the one for him so...I...that was the reason I broke things off with us that night. I didn't want to be in your way or rather his way. I just had no fucking idea how hard it would be -"

"What's that?"

"Hmm?"

"That part you mumbled at the end there."

"I didn't say anything."

Naruto raised a brow. "Yeah, you did. I heard you mumble something."

"It was of no concern of yours. I was just muttering to myself."

They eyed each other warily; as if daring the other to finally cave into what their hearts were really screaming out to be said, until Sasuke finally looked away.

"Hopefully Haku's okay," he mumbled.

"He'll be fine," Naruto insisted with a nod. "Didn't look as if anything too fantastic happened today. They really did look...happy together."

"All a ploy."

"Could be, but still...maybe Sai isn't such a bad guy. I mean...maybe he really does like Haku but is just messed up right now and can't really decide which side he wants to be on."

Sasuke snorted in exasperation. "Oh, please. Are you trying to tell me that if Sai falls that hard for Haku, he's likely to defect from Orochimaru's ranks? You have no idea how loyal his officers are do you?"

"You were once like that," Naruto replied with a smirk. "Look how you turned out with just the right influence in your life."

Sasuke blushed darkly. "Shu...shut up. I am ...I already didn't like him from the beginning -"

"But you were still loyal to him -"

"Yes, but -"

"People can change."

"I know that, but -"

"If we can isolate Sai -"

"It's going to be pointless. Besides Haku doesn't really love him. He's crazy over _you_, remember?"

"I might not be the sharpest tool in the shed, but even you had to have seen how Haku was behaving today. Was that all acting?"

"Haku's skills are better than most give him credit for. He can make you believe anything if he so wills it."

Naruto bit his lower lip in thought. "I still think it's not all acting. If those two hang around each other long enough, they might end up falling for each other."

"Why are you so desperate to get them together?" Sasuke asked with a raised brow.

"Because I don't want him to be unhappy. If he sees us together, it's only going to remind him of my rejection."

Sasuke struggled to ignore the skip of his heart at Naruto's admission, even if it seemed the blond wasn't aware of just what he had said.

(if he sees _us together_)

_Does it mean that he wants us to...?_

"Damn it," Naruto muttered in frustration. "Why can't things be so fucking easy when it comes to relationships?"

"I don't think it's ever supposed to be that way," Sasuke replied quietly. "I think I've learned that the hard way the past few weeks." He gave a weak smile. "You had years to learn yours with Sakura. My crash course is a lot more difficult to swallow."

Naruto looked up with his heart in his throat; the raw emotion in Sasuke's voice causing his pulses to race like the flutter of a million butterflies in flight. He looked into twin pools of darkness that seemed to shimmer with the promise of tears; a sight and thought that seemed incomprehensible when it came to the man before him.

_I think I now see and understand what you were saying, Haku. This...this is the Sasuke I've been searching for all this time,_ Naruto thought with a rueful smile, only to give a barely audible gasp as he suddenly _heard_ it. Like the breathless waver of a child seeking permission into a forbidden place, Sasuke's voice filled his mind just like it had happened back in that hellhole of a prison.

_Giving you up was the hardest thing I had to do, Naruto. _

His lips quirked in acknowledgment as he closed his eyes.

_So we both agree that what we had and did was not a sin after all._

Sasuke turned crimson at the sound of Naruto's voice as he too allowed his lashes to flutter closed. He could feel them slipping into that welcome void again; that place of solace where only two of them mattered.

_If it is a sin to be with you, Naruto, then I willingly concede that I am the guiltiest sinner that ever lived._

_Your confession is worth a purification rite, don't you agree?_

_I am ready for my ablutions, Naruto. What exactly did you have in mind?_

"Only this...for now," came the breathless response which had Sasuke finally lifting his lashes just in time to feel Naruto's warm lips against his. When the other man had moved, Sasuke had no idea, but he could care less about that for this was a kiss he had longed and craved for so long. He welcomed the questing tongue with a soft groan; stomach muscles clenching, nerve endings triggered, ever so grateful he was sitting for he was sure his knees would have trembled in resignation.

Naruto's hands enclosed his on the chains and held on tightly; perhaps with the secret promise that this time he would make things right. For though their days of being together were all but numbered, Naruto vowed to make every moment with Sasuke count. They certainly had a lot of catching up to do.

Except for one little problem they would come to realize much later…

* * *

><p>…Haku failed to return as he had promised.<p> 


	33. 33: Beneath the Veil

**Notes:** Yay! I wasn't killed...yet! So I live to write another day! *takes deep breath* Muchas gracias to all ye lovely folks for your feedback/comments. I am literally out the door as I write this, so sorry I can't comment more. However, if anyone truly understands how the new image option works for (the one that allows you to upload cover images for the story), please let me know! I'd love to have a cover page for this, won't you? Not that I know how to draw squat, so if anyone knows a good fanartist I can pester, and if you have a favorite scene you'd like to see in art form, let me know!

Enjoy the update!...and be gentle. *runs off into the sunset never to be seen again* -_-

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 33:<strong>

**Beneath the Veil**

_If I see that bridge  
>That is spanned by flights of magpies<br>Across the arc of heaven  
>Made white with a deep-laid frost,<br>Then the night is almost past._

_**-Otomo no Yakamochi**_

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke:<em>

After an extremely successful raid/bust - where Asuma's squad had seized several thousand kilos of illegal contraband – mostly cocaine, heroin, and unprocessed opium – I was subjected to his drivel about the effects of drugs on the human mind and body. I was half-listening, considering I was left with the task of completing the mountain of paperwork, while he lounged lazily on the veranda smoking. He seemed intent on telling me about _all_ the drugs he had experimented with as a younger man for some inane reason.

"...and then there was opium," he reminisced with a reflective smile as rings of smoke escaped into the air before his face. "You do know opium, don't you?"

"Mmmmhmm..." I mumbled absently while stamping another signed decree. Of course I knew what opium was. Orochimaru smoked the damn thing sometimes and the stench often reminded me of the incense that was burned in the temples...the sickening kind.

"...man, when you hit that thing, it's like _whoomp!_ Immediate heaviness – like someone had just slammed into you, but in a good way. Then just like that..._bliss_." He gave a sigh as if lovesick. "It's amazing how light you feel...like you're floating on air, you can't feel your legs...you can't even _see_ them." He laughed softly. "Everything feels a-okay, you feel like you could do any fucking thing, you're the only bright light amongst shadows and damn if everything doesn't seem to sparkle at the same time. Pretty fucking weird experience all around. Pity that doesn't last for too long though..."

Pity indeed.

Still, if Asuma were here, I'd probably tell him that I was just about experiencing the same effects he had so aptly described back then. Stealing a surreptitious glance, every now and then, at the silent blond beside me, I tried to tell my thudding heart that I should only take his words at the playground at face value. I told myself that I shouldn't expect too much even if it had seemed like he was willing to give _us_ another chance. I had no idea what 'us' really entailed, if Naruto simply just wanted the physical aspect of it to continue, or if he was willing to...to...

(_what _exactly?)

I furrowed my brows in thought. Was I naïve enough to believe that anything more could come from our relationship? What exactly was I looking for? Someone that I could spend the rest of my life with? A companion I could come home to after a long day, talk to or listen to, and share my bed at night? Weren't those roles reserved for the opposite sex? Roles that my mother had performed so lovingly and dutifully for my father? Was I looking for someone to play the role of 'mother' in my life? If that was the case, then Naruto was definitely out of the question. Just the very mental picture of him waiting at home for me - looking docile or meek - was too much for me to deal with.

"What's so funny?" he asked when my light chuckle broke free.

I shook my head and gave a light shrug. "Nothing. Just..."

I glanced at him again; as tall as me, shoulders that now looked stronger and leaner thanks to his training, a face that has been battered and bruised and still managed to look so fascinating, those lips that had tasted sweet and salty, to eyes that were filled with bemusement and slight amusement at the same time. We were not holding hands – we would reserve that mushy sentiment for the females – but we were walking close enough that we would bump into each other every now and then, and as my arm brushed his again...I couldn't help the small smile that came to my lips.

"Nothing at all," I repeated quietly. I just hoped he wouldn't be able to read my thoughts as it would be rather embarrassing to reveal my real line of thinking.

It did make me wonder, again, about why we _did_ have the ability to see into each other's minds. We had not really experienced that since Gudan, and yet tonight...for some inexplicable reason, it had returned. Why? Were we only able to experience this 'telepathy' when we _really_ wanted to? Did we have to concentrate extra hard (though I don't recall doing any such thing in the first place), or did it just come whenever it felt like it?

_Why waste my time bothering about it? If it happens, then it happens. There are just some things that defy logic, and this is one of them. _

I took a deep breath. "And what are you thinking about? You've been pretty quiet. Changing your mind already?"

"Changing my mind about what?" he asked with a raised brow, and I was grateful that darkness had finally fallen so he couldn't see how flushed my features had become.

"What you said at the swings," I mumbled and kicked myself inwardly for even talking about it. Let sleeping dogs lie, right? Maybe I should have just kept my big mouth shut before giving him reasons to doubt his decision to –

"Why would I change my mind?" came the barely audible reply that had me looking at him. His body language clearly spoke of his embarrassment as well, and there was something rather..._endearing_ about how he seemed to hunch within himself; hands sinking deeper into his pockets, his feet kicking and shuffling at the ground, while his gaze seemed trained on nothing in particular. I felt that now familiar hard twist within my chest; that emotion that let me know that at least for tonight, I would have him to myself again. Even if it was for ten minutes before Haku returned, it would be more than enough to tell him just how much I –

"Yikes...rain drops?"

I looked up and felt the first few plops of wetness upon my forehead and cheeks. The winds had picked up a little, and though the rest of the day had been relatively sunny, this was quite unexpected. The weather in Buk-gu was so damn unpredictable.

"Let's hurry before it gets heavier," I said as I began to walk faster. We were almost home anyway. "Might just end up being a drizzle."

"Yeah," Naruto agreed as he matched my strides. "Let's hope Haku makes it before it does get bad. Don't think he took an umbrella with him."

Unfortunately, I was wrong. The 'drizzle' – with another sudden gust of wind – immediately became a downpour; as if the heavens were not even going to bother with the step-by-step process before punishing mere mortals with its tears of fury. I could finally see our apartment building – thank God – and though I was about to suggest that we take shelter beneath the awning of a nearby shop, I figured we could make it if we ran really fast. We were already drenched, so why would an extra five minutes kill us?

"Wait!" Naruto suddenly yelled out, forcing me to come to a stop.

"What now?" I shouted, having to turn to notice he wasn't running after me. However, he had this rather odd smile on his face that made me frown in confusion. What the fuck was so funny now? "What are you doing? Let's go already! We're getting soaked!"

He jogged up to me and with that smile still on his face, the sneaky bastard reached out to grab fistfuls of my jacket.

"Naruto...!" I cried out, only for whatever else I would have said to be lost within the not unpleasant pressure of his lips against mine.

_Fuck yes!_

I didn't allow myself to question why he was doing this and simply gave in with as much interest; my tongue seeking his hungrily and devouring when offered willingly. I literally felt as if we were molding our bodies to one another, unmindful of any curious looks coming our way (who would be bothered to want to stop in the middle of the pouring rain to watch us anyway?), or the fact that the rain kept beating mercilessly on our flesh. I reached up to cup his cheeks roughly, forcing him to release the grip on my shirt though his hands did find their way down to my sides and then...

(how embarrassing!)

...sink themselves into the back pockets of my pants to pull me even tighter still against him. If the rain hadn't made it obvious that we were both terribly aroused by all of this, the additional friction caused by the bulges in our nether regions nearly had my knees trembling in anticipation. I _wanted_ him _bad_. I wanted to taste every inch of this man until I had him screaming my name. I wanted to dare myself to even go as far as taking him within my mouth, to experience what Haku must have and to prove that I too could bring him to the realms of orgasm with just my lips and tongue. God, how I longed for the challenge.

"Nar...Naruto," I panted breathlessly as I finally pulled away, but just so far, to get some much-needed air. My head was spinning. I was feverish, all but burning up with desire, and as I met those heated blue eyes that said so much, I knew we had to leave _now_.

"Let's go," he whispered thickly with a sensual lick of his lips that had me aching terribly. I simply nodded and (mushy sentiment be damned), tugged his hand and began to lead him back to the building.

_We have time,_ I thought quickly; not wanting to release this haze of lust enveloping me like a cloud. _Half an hour at least until Haku returns. We have –_

I blushed as I felt the sudden squeeze of his fingers around mine, but I didn't want to look at him because I was sure if I did, we'd probably never make it to the building. I'd drag him into an alley nearby and –

"Hey...isn't that Jae Weong?"

_Goddamn it! What does that old coot want with us now? _

Sure enough, it was the building's landlord at the gate with an umbrella and a somewhat pensive expression on his visage. He waved at us and with a muttered curse beneath my breath – somehow knowing that whatever Naruto and I had planned mere minutes earlier was going to have to wait for a while – I waved back warily.

"I looking for you two," Jae began as we approached. He held the umbrella over our heads – which was pretty pointless – and ushered us into the lobby. "Your brother called here twice already. He want to speak to you."

At that, Naruto and I exchanged a look; knowing damn well that for Itachi to call so incessantly must mean there was something up.

"Did he say why he was calling?" I asked as we followed Jae Weong into the underground 'communications' room.

"He not tell me," Jae Weong admitted. "But he say he will call back in about..." He eyed the clock on the wall. "Ten more minutes. So you stay here."

Like he needed to tell us that. Naruto and I pulled up two of the wooden chairs to the table and prepared ourselves for the wait, while Jae Weong muttered something about leaking roofs and excused himself. In the silence, broken only by the faint sound of thunder outside, and the _drip drip drip_ of water from our soaked clothes and shoes, we stared at the phone as if waiting for Armageddon.

"What do you think he's calling us for?" Naruto finally asked as he took off his face cap and shook it out before giving a sneeze. The cold was obviously beginning to settle in; our feverish high from the kiss in the rain, now waning with the harsh reality around us.

"I can only imagine he's gotten some new information," I replied quietly. I took off my face cap as well and closed my eyes. All of a sudden, I felt a sense of trepidation. It was queasiness in my stomach that made me want to vomit. The sudden sound of the door opening had us sitting up and looking toward it quickly, but it was only Shikamaru who gave us a nod of acknowledgement.

"Hey, Shika!" Naruto greeted jovially. "'Sup?"

"Jae Weong told me you two were back," he said as he too pulled up a chair and eyed our wet appearance. "I won't even bother asking where you guys spent most of the day -"

The shrill ring of the phone interrupted his words, but had me all but diving for the device.

"Itachi?" I called out, panicking slightly when I heard nothing else at the other end of the line until I remembered I had to punch in a few keys (code) before connecting the lines. _Damn it!_

"Itachi?" I tried again after finally getting it right.

"Sasuke? Are you alone?" He sounded faint, as if calling from some place high.

"I'm with Naruto and Shikamaru," I replied. I put him on speaker phone so everyone else could hear him. "Where are you? And what's going on?"

"Hello Naruto...Shikamaru," he greeted first; waiting until he heard their responses before continuing. "I'm on a train heading back to Tokyo. I was just in Hokkaido for a meeting with a few people you might find interesting when you return. Do you recall the conversation we had the other day about a possible plant in Buk-gu?"

"Yes..." _A few people I might find interesting? What is he talking abou-?_

"Well, seems like our theories were right," Itachi stated; his voice becoming a little clearer. "Jūgo has been keeping me updated and with his last coded message, it appears that Kimimaro was the one responsible for sending the member of the secret police down there."

The three of us looked at each other, Naruto and I more so, and that feeling of trepidation grew tenfold. I glanced at the clock. Haku had promised to be back within the hour. It was only five minutes past said hour and though I figured he'd head straight upstairs when he arrived, there was still that nagging feeling that –

"...revealed that it was someone by the name of Shin. Does that name ring a bell?" Itachi asked.

"Shin...yes," I replied warily. "He was in training to become a watchdog a few years back, but was 'chosen' by Orochimaru to become a member of his super elite. He was just there one day and the next...gone."

"Figures," Itachi mumbled. "Do you remember what he looks like?"

I sighed heavily, and with unspoken approval from my companions, I began to tell Itachi about Sai and his relationship with Haku. By the time I was done, the deafening silence at the other end was enough to tell me that things were about to change drastically.

"Where is Haku now?" Itachi eventually asked.

"He hasn't returned," Naruto replied. "Or at least we don't know if he has -"

"I'll go check quickly," Shikamaru offered as he rose to his feet and left the room before either of us could stop him. Every second he was away was like a death knell in my heart. I could feel my palms getting sweaty, and I tried to steady my breathing...to be calm...

"He's going to be fine," came the sudden low whisper that had me looking up at the man across me. Naruto – though clear he was concerned as well – had a small smile of reassurance on his features. "You said he was one of the strongest fighters you've met, right? Besides, I doubt he'll get himself in trouble. He's already probably upstairs waiting for you -"

"No dice," came the firm words from Shikamaru as he walked back in. "Jae Weong's been monitoring the doorway and no sign of Haku yet. I did tell him to make sure he tells Haku we're in here when he returns."

"Maybe it's the rain," Naruto – ever the optimist - said. "He's probably sitting it out and waiting until it's over before coming back. Let's give him one more hour before going out to look for him."

"And where the fuck would we even begin looking?" I snapped with an irritation that stemmed not from anger at him, but anger at myself for even sending Haku out to this damned 'date' in the first place. If anything happened to him, it would no doubt be my fault. I had sent him on this 'mission', and his loyalty to me would end up causing his death. Goddamn it!

"Like Naruto said," Itachi was saying. "Let's give him another hour before writing him off, Sasuke. I know you're worried...we all are, but Haku has proven to be able to take care of himself. So have a little faith in him, eh? In the interim, I will speak to Jiraiya as soon as I'm done with you. You should all begin to make preparations for leaving. If Shin or Sai or whatever the hell he is, has been on this mission for a while, you can be sure he's been sending information back to Orochimaru all this time. It's likely there might be others with him. We cannot take any chances. Jae Weong, and hopefully Jiraiya, will help facilitate your departure."

"How soon are we looking at here?" Shikamaru asked. "Temari and I had planned our wedding for Wednesday. I don't mind canceling it. I just want to tell her exactly when we have to leave that's all."

There was a long pause at the other end of the line before Itachi returned. "I'm really sorry this had to happen now, Shikamaru. I realize how long you and Temari must have waited for this moment and -"

"Hey, no sweat," Shikamaru replied with a small smile, though I could tell he was disappointed. "Life isn't always prone to give you what you want, and you have to make do with what you've got, eh? If Temari and I could wait for two years, what's another two?"

"Look, let's just wait to hear what Haku says when he returns, right?" Naruto said with a shrug. "I mean...let's look at this here. If Sai's been around for such a long time, how come he's not made any move to take any of us out yet? What if he really does like Haku and doesn't want to get us in trouble? The guy isn't exactly making any attempt to hide who he really is...well besides us figuring he's actually a spy. So before we go running away, let's wait to hear Haku's final report."

"How naïve can you possibly be?" I asked with my irritation growing by the second. "He's already been sending information to Orochimaru and Kimimaro all this time. The reason why he's so hung up on Haku is for purely selfish reasons. Guys like Sai have a one-track mind and are purely committed to finishing their assigned missions, no matter how long it takes. It's only a matter of time before he snaps, and when he does, do you think he'll be 'nice' enough to spare any of us? Like Itachi said, he might not be working alone! Sitting here and giving him the benefit of the doubt is not helping anyone especially Haku!"

"Don't yell at us," Naruto snapped back just as angrily. "We're all just as worried as you are, all right? Just calm the fuck down and wait for him to show up with more information we could use! Besides, my theory still stands, if there are others working with him, how come we aren't dead or haven't been ambushed yet?"

"Naruto's got a point, Sasuke," Shikamaru replied quietly as Naruto and I continued to glare at each other. "All we can do now is wait. Haku's the key to all of this for now."

I cursed beneath my breath and turned away from those seemingly accusing blue eyes.

_You sent him out there,_ they seemed to say, and though I knew I was only imagining it and I was overplaying the guilt-trip card, I still couldn't help it.

"...else does this Jūgo person know?" Naruto was asking. "And how come he's so close to that guy anyway? I thought he was Orochimaru's like...second in command or something?"

"They were apparently childhood friends," Itachi explained. "And Jūgo does have the ability to stoke one's inner kindness when he sets his mind to it. Let's just say he and Kimimaro have been doing a lot of catching up and in the throes of passion...we sometimes let slip information we'd rather not."

I felt my cheeks burn at the insinuation, daring to steal a glance at Naruto, who was busy biting on a fingernail and not really as aware of what Itachi's words meant.

_In the throes of passion...argh! This was not the time to be thinking of that!_

I looked at the clock again. Twenty minutes past. Still no Haku.

"...to Kiba, Orochimaru's been working hard on more additions to the underground labyrinths." I forced myself back to the conversation; my brows raising at this new information. "Kiba says they've almost completed the renovation of the arena as well as some of the houses that got burned during our attack." Itachi sighed heavily. I could almost picture him running his fingers through his hair in frustration. "He's also not definite, but he believes Orochimaru's been hiring a whole lot more officers for his special army. There's been a lot of 'disappearances' of some officers lately. Kiba feels he might be chosen next. Suigetsu's already been picked, which is why I haven't heard from him in a while. God knows where they've taken him and the others to."

"And you don't believe he'll betray us?" Shikamaru asked warily.

"Suigetsu might be a head case, but he's loyal. I wouldn't worry too much about him spilling anything about us to Orochimaru."

"What about our _other_ problem?" Naruto asked in a tone that gave nothing away of what he was really thinking. I watched him carefully all the same.

"If you mean Danzo, then he has been smart enough to lay low recently. He's trying to disassociate himself from the recent attacks and it's getting Ikegami restless. Danzo's beginning to put together a campaign aiming for the public's sympathy while trying to get re-elected into the DIET. However, we're making things a little difficult for him. Several of our members have become aides to councilmen working hard to prevent Danzo from getting the votes he needs to even be considered for re-election. I already told you about Councilman Onoki's role in all of this. He's spearheading the anti-Danzo sentiment and so far...it seems to be working."

"But...?" Shikamaru prodded.

"But Danzo has the money and some loyalists within the ranks; most of who are senior members of the parliament. Hell, I'm sure he even has the prime minister in his pocket, because the bastard is sure as hell not playing ball with those who want Danzo out. Our next plan of action is to -"

_Bzzt!_

The sudden fizzling sound akin to static, but not quite, was a loud jolt to us. The silence that proceeded it was more alarming.

"Wha...what...?" I tapped the telephone foolishly as if that would help make it work again. "What the hell happened? Itachi?"

"Disconnected probably," Shikamaru reasoned with a heavy sigh. "Guess we'll just have to wait...for either Itachi to call back or Haku to show up, whichever comes first."

I opened my mouth to refute his thinking, but the loud scrape of the chair across the floor signaled Naruto rising to his feet. "I'm going to wait with Jae Weong," he announced with a firm nod as if unwilling to engage in an argument with his decision. "Let me know when Itachi calls back."

He left before I could stop him, not that he would have listened to me anyway if I tried to make him stay. All the same, I was torn because I felt I ought to be the one waiting at the door, but at the same time, I didn't want to miss my brother should he return with more important information. I slumped back on my chair and pinched the bridge of my nose as my head began to throb with a headache. With so many different thoughts and possible scenarios going on in my head, it was all I could do not to scream in frustration.

_Where are you, Haku?_ I prayed inwardly with every ominous ticking of the clock. _Just where the hell are you?_

* * *

><p><em>Haku:<em>

Looking back, Haku would marvel at how everything seemed to go downhill so damn quickly.

For most of the day, being with Sai had been a surprising pleasure. There were times he had to remind himself that he had a job to do for Sai had the knack of pouring on the charm effortlessly, which in turn caused Haku to be distracted more often than he'd like. In addition, he had made no overt moves (like the surprise kiss), and the closest he had come to being that intimate was holding onto Haku's hand as they went through the museum.

Conversation had been light for the most part, Haku choosing to downplay his curiosity until the time was right. He knew he couldn't just blurt out the obvious like "who are you really and who do you work for?" Hence he stuck to revealing more of himself in little bits and pieces while studying Sai's body language at the same time.

_Too good,_Haku had thought when during a break for a quick snack at the arcade, Haku had mentioned that it was the first time ever he had been to such a place. "Where I grew up, there was no time for me to play such things. I had to train a lot in a dojo. Every now and then, they'd pair us up with someone else, and I sometimes got to spar with Shin-chan."

"The one you said looks like me?" Sai had replied with a smile that gave nothing away besides genuine curiosity and interest.

"That's right."

"Was he strong?"

Haku nodded emphatically. "Oh yes! Shin was second only to Sas...eh...one of the other boys in the dojo that he was often paired up with. You should have seen them both spar. You'd think they wanted to kill each other!"

It was the wistful smile that came to Sai's face that told Haku everything, but ever the professional, it was wiped away quickly and that familiar expression of blatant interest filled his visage again. It was at this time that Haku excused himself to "use the restroom", making sure he actually went into it (in case Sai was following him), waited for about five minutes before slipping out with a group of three loud-mouthed teens and finding the pay phone tucked in a darkened corner and away from prying eyes. Getting Karin was no surprise since she had promised she'd be stuck by the device all day waiting to hear from him. Knowing his time was limited, or Sai was bound to come looking for him, he quickly told Karin he would be home within the hour and she should relay the message to both Sasuke-sama and Naruto-kun. Satisfied that she was not going to forget, he hung up and made his way back to the main game room.

"I thought you had gotten lost," Sai said with a smile. "I was just about to come looking for you."

"It's crazy back there," Haku replied with a mock pout. "Pushing and shoving and everyone wanting to get in at the same time. Such animals."

Sai chuckled. "I hear you. Hey, you done with this place? How about we go watch a movie? There's this great one about robots from Outer Space. Sounds good, doesn't it?"

Haku made a show of looking at the large colorful clock that hung against a neon-lit wall. "Sorry, but I don't think I can make it today." He looked regretful. "Why don't we do it next weekend? The movie will still be there, won't it?"

Sai mock groaned and held a hand to his chest. "Aww. I really wanted to see it with you today."

Haku giggled and nudged him playfully. "Next Saturday, I promise."

"Promise?"

"Scout's honor as they say," Haku replied with a salute.

"All right...let's get out of here. Suddenly this place seems too claustrophobic." He said this with a blink-and-you-just-might-miss-it dark glance over his shoulder as if he had spotted something or someone. Haku turned to look, but saw nothing amiss. The place was still jam packed with sweaty, eager, and willing young people all too preoccupied with either themselves or their partners.

Still it was great to be outside again and to get some fresh air, though the undeniable smell of rain filled his lungs as he inhaled deeply. "Whoo. Never thought I'd ever say that the polluted air of the city feels much better than the stench in there. This is one of the reasons why I miss the mountains so much."

"You grew up in the mountains?" Sai asked. There was that glance behind him again, though he was quick to turn his attention back to Haku with a smile that now seemed slightly strained.

"Yes," Haku replied; keeping his voice light and indifferent. What had Sai on edge? It wasn't so obvious, but Sai's steps seemed a little quicker and there it was again, that look over his –

"Let's go this way," he suddenly said, reaching out for Haku's hand to tug him a little harder than necessary toward the opposite side of the street.

"Why this way?" Haku asked warily, having to raise his voice a little as they weaved and bobbed between incoming traffic. "This isn't the way we came, and besides, I have to get to the bus stop. I don't want to miss the last bus heading to my area."

"You won't miss it," Sai replied brusquely. "This is a short cut."

"A short cut?" Haku looked incredulous. Sai was really now tugging him harder; nothing short of running at this point, and as he looked over his shoulder in bemusement, Haku couldn't be sure, but there seemed to be two men walking in similar fashion after them. They didn't look like the police, and if it wasn't for their brisk walk, they could blend in with any other passerby...well except for the stern expressions on their faces.

_Are we being followed? But...why?_

Sai led him up the steps of a pedestrian bridge, hastily excused himself (with Haku doing the same) as they pushed and shoved their way through the throng of people taking their time to get to their destinations. On the bridge, one had a great view of the traffic whizzing by beneath them and Haku briefly entertained the idea of Sai doing something crazy like pushing him off. Fortunately, all the other boy did was to take them down the other side of the street...

(we are right back where we started)

...and into a narrow alley that looked and smelled like a sewer. Two female junkies barely looked up from their dazed stupor as they slouched on a building's steps. In another corner, there was a homeless man fast asleep with his mouth open and drool accumulating on his chin. His hungry, skinny-looking dog could only give a tiny yip at the sight of the newcomers before settling back within its owners grimy arms. As if that wasn't bad enough, they passed what looked like a couple in the throes of passion; if you could call the woman with runny makeup clinging to the wall and screaming out her pleasure as a business man (evident from the suit he was still wearing, though his pants were around his ankles) fucked her ruthlessly while calling her dirty names. Haku would only have a second to process the sight of such crude behavior before they burst out to a street he was not familiar with at all.

"There's a bus stop just down the block," Sai instructed. "You can't miss the sign. Sorry I have to leave you so quickly, but...there's something I have to take care of."

"Uh -"

"I had a great time with you today, Haku," Sai interrupted with a smile that could be considered really sincere, though there was an expression in those dark eyes Haku did not like. They seemed frantic, yet angry. "I will see you next weekend as promised, okay?"

Haku parted his lips to query him, to ask just what and who those men were, but all that could come out of his mouth were "Okay."

"Goodnight," Sai said just as the first few drops of rain began to fall. He began to walk away from Haku...backwards; that smile still on his visage. "And hurry up. You don't want to get wet."

"You too," Haku replied with a wave. He spun on his heels to head in the direction Sai had told him to, the rain beginning to fall a little harder with every step he took. He looked over his shoulder, only to see that Sai was still there watching him. Biting his lower lip, after lifting his hand in another wave, he made the turn and saw the obvious sign of a bus where about three other people stood waiting for it to arrive.

/There's something I have to take care of... /

_What secrets are you hiding, Sai?_

He was tempted, oh-so-very tempted to go back to see what was going to happen, but the bus was just arriving at the curb, and Haku had a feeling that he was still being watched. He stepped onto the vehicle, paid his fare with the token Sai had gotten for him earlier in the day, and settled into a seat right behind the bus driver. As the bus left the curb, Haku eyed the other occupants, many of whom were either half-asleep or struggling to get as dry as possible from the rain.

/There's something I have to take care of... /

_I **have** to know._

"Driver...eh..." Haku cursed his inability to fully communicate with the natives. "I stop here," he said in broken Hangul. "Stop. Here. Please."

The driver looked bemused. They had hardly gone a block, and it was obvious from his look of irritation that Haku should have just walked instead of wasting his goddamn time in the first place. Blushing at the expression on his face, as well as the other glares from some of the passengers, Haku all but leapt out of the bus, nearly avoiding getting run over as the driver peeled away as quickly as he had stopped.

"Fuck you too," Haku cursed beneath his breath. It was rare he said things like this, but with all that was swirling in his mind right now, proper decorum was the least of his worries. Besides, Naruto-kun would probably give him a hi-five for such language.

He jogged back the way he had come, hoping he wouldn't miss his way since the rain was really coming down in torrents now. At the bus stop, he paused – perhaps assuming Sai would be here waiting for the next one – but there was no sight of him. Most of the street was clear of people as they were either waiting it out beneath shelter or lucky enough to have an umbrella handy. Haku lowered his head and walked briskly toward where he hoped the alley was. He would have missed it, if it wasn't for the sudden loud and undeniable sound of a gun going off and the subsequent shrill scream of a female. It would have been hard for anyone else to recognize that as being a gunshot since thunder chose to rumble at the same time, but having grown up in an environment where the sound was almost a daily occurrence, Haku's senses heightened in awareness.

He reached into his bag to withdraw the slender throwing knife he kept hidden within its flaps, pressing his body against the wall of the building as his heart beat drummed loudly within his ears.

The woman shrieked again, this time accompanied with unintelligible words that soundly oddly like "you killed him!" but Haku couldn't be sure. She tried to scream again, but there was an unmistakable cracking sound; a sound that had Haku's eyes widening in horror as he dashed out into the alley just in time to see the whore slumping bonelessly to the ground (her neck at a terrible twisted angle) with the whites of her eyes staring accusingly at Haku.

_Why weren't you here on time?_ they seemed to say. _What took you so fucking long?_

Unfortunately that wasn't the worst of it for beside her body was that of the business man as well as the two men Haku had noticed chasing them earlier. There was a gaping wound in the business man's neck; his thick blood gushing out silently to blend with the rain that formed a bloody but flowing pool around him. The other two bodies didn't look any better for just like the woman, it seemed like their necks and arms were broken. It wasn't until he noticed the dark stump next to a pistol, did Haku feel the bile rising to his throat. In the gloom of the alley, it was difficult to make out at first, but with the flash of lightning, it became more evident. It was a hand that had been neatly sliced off, where its thick fingers seemed to claw at nothing. However, it was what was on one of the fingers that caught his attention. It was a ring Haku had seen once before on an officer's hand back at Byaku-Shinkyou, and it was this ring that Sai leant down to remove. He held it between his thumb and forefinger for a second before tucking it away within his jacket.

"I was hoping you wouldn't return," he was saying; his voice low but still loud enough to carry to the frozen young man watching him. "I didn't want you to see this, Haku."

He looked up with a rueful smile, turning around completely to reveal the weapon he had used to commit his crime. It was a sword, just about as long as a _wakizashi_, but with the markings of an ancient _jutte_. It didn't look as if he had any plans to tuck it away anytime soon.

"Who are they?" Haku asked, surprised to find his voice was even and flat, absolutely devoid of emotion despite the thudding of his heart that almost betrayed how he really felt. He could hear Sasuke-sama's warnings not to get into a fight and to escape if he had the chance, but how could he after witnessing such mindless killings? What had the business man and the whore done to deserve their deaths?

"Who do you think they are?" Sai asked with a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. "You saw the ring I took off his finger. You should be aware of their status."

"Watchdogs?"

"Not just any watchdog," Sai agreed with a light shrug. "But those in my unit; a special elite force chosen by Lord Orochimaru himself. What I have done is inexcusable, but I can always come up with a story for my discretions. What I cannot stand is having people tailing me when I was specifically told I would be working on this mission alone." He kicked at the dead body of one of his cohorts angrily. "Kimimaro-sama obviously does not trust me."

Haku's jaws worked and he took a step back; fingers tightening around the handle of the knife. "How long? How long have you been here? How much do you know?"

Sai studied Haku for a long minute before shrugging again. "I guess I can tell you since I have no intention of letting you leave here alive...well alive enough to return to your band of misfits. I arrived about a month ago, long enough to study and observe your routines until I can rattle them off with my eyes closed. It's amazing how weak you've all become especially you and Sasuke. Anyone could have eliminated you easily. I was especially disappointed in you, Haku. Listening to you whine and moan about being in love with someone...urgh. Whatever happened to the warrior I knew?"

"Whatever happened to the Shin I knew?" Haku retorted coldly. "At least he had a heart."

"Shin no longer exists," Sai replied flatly. "In his place is a fighter who believes in justice as Orochimaru-sama has decreed. This world will be purified from sinners like Uzumaki Naruto and Nara Shikamaru. As for you, your betrayal to Orochimaru-sama will not go unpunished." He raised the _jutte_ to his lips and licked its blade slowly, teeth flashing into a grin that revealed an inner madness Haku had never seen before. He took another step backward.

"After all he did for you," Sai began as he stepped over the bodies to move closer. "You turn your back to him."

"You have been blinded by doctrines that preach lies," Haku replied carefully. "For years we've been fed stories by Orochimaru-sama about what true justice is, but we were fooled, Shin."

"I am **not** Shin!" Sai roared. "Do not call me by that tainted name! You have no idea how much it sickens me!"

Haku barely saw it, but the pain was nothing short of blinding. It wasn't the _jutte_ that had been thrown, but a much smaller knife – almost akin to the one he was holding – which had ripped right through his sweatshirt, struck the skin beneath before burying itself into the wall behind him. Haku sucked in his breath and resisted the urge to hold his now bleeding side. He could feel the warmth of his blood pooling into the top of his pants, and just as Sai seemed to throw another at him, he twisted out of the way, spun to grab the embedded knife behind him before throwing both in Sai's direction.

_Damn it! Missed!_

Sai had leapt out of the way with such effortless grace, Haku found himself envious, but for only a second because Sai was back again like a goddamn hurricane. This time he swung the _jutte _and almost took out a chunk of Haku's left cheek, if Haku hadn't ducked in time to deliver a blow to Sai's torso with as much strength as he could muster. Sai grunted in surprise at the attack, but was still alert enough to sink the weapon into Haku's upper arm, or would have if Haku hadn't moved. It only managed to rip out a large piece of the sweat shirt, which Haku ripped out completely and flung it in Sai's face to blindside him for a moment. He dove for the knives he had thrown earlier and rolled away from the weapon that was struck right into the ground where his face had been seconds before. With Sai this close, he whipped out his left arm and plunged the _jutte_ into Sai's upper right arm.

There was no cry of pain from the other man, but Haku wasn't waiting to hear that. He staggered to his feet, almost losing his footing as he stumbled over the body of the businessman. It was enough for Sai to lunge for him again, this time delivering a jaw breaking blow to Haku's face.

"I promised to cause you pain before delivering you to Kimimaro-sama," he panted with a grin. "And I will do so with so much pleasure. You willARGH!"

Haku's fingers had raked across his right cheek so deeply, his fingernails came away with thick globs of blood from the damage he had done. Sai flailed backwards with his hands over his face, but only to find himself slamming hard into the wall across the alley with the hard kick delivered to his chest.

"Cause me pain?" Haku bellowed as he stomped up to the other man trying to stagger to his feet. "I've been in pain all my life, you bastard, and just when I thought there was a little hope for you...you prove me wrong."

Sai tried to rise to his feet, but he was knocked down as Haku struck out again; this time the kick connecting with Sai's left temple. The pain on his abdomen was beginning to get worse and Haku knew he was loosing more blood than he would care to admit. Still, there were questions that needed answering and as he bent to his haunches and reached out to grab a fistful of Sai's shirt; he slapped Sai hard enough to force him back to consciousness.

"How much did you tell Kimimaro-sama?" he asked. "How much does he know?"

Sai seemed to chuckle as his head lolled about. His vision seemed glazed and with another hard slap from Haku, it appeared to clear a little. He lifted his gaze to meet the cold brown ones before him.

"Now...that's more like it," Sai said with a light smirk. Thanks to Haku's rather hard slaps, a dribble of blood escaped the corner of his mouth, though quickly washed away with the rain still pelting around them. "That's the Haku I once knew."

"Answer my fucking question! How much does he know?"

Sai smirked and rolled his eyes. He barely cried out as Haku delivered a blow to his face, only grunting as if someone had simply sat on him. Haku was getting angrier by the second. Getting Sai to talk was going to be next to impossible at this rate. He had heard rumors about the elite officers being trained to tolerate pain especially when tortured. They would never reveal their secrets no matter what you did to them.

He prepared to drive his fist into that bloody, smirking visage, when his world suddenly exploded in bright pain. Sai had driven a smaller _jutte_ into the same area he had inflicted his first wound. Haku's arm dropped as he looked down in horror at the weapon sticking out of his abdomen. His first wild thought was that this was poetic justice for just as he had struck Kimimaro in the same area back at the arena, Sai was only repaying the favor.

_Heh...how ironic. I could almost laugh._

He fell back to the ground with a sickening thud; his vision wavering as he struggled to control his breathing. He had no idea how deep the weapon was, but pulling it out was going to be hurt like hell. A sudden burning sensation in his throat forced him to cough and release the blood that had flowed up at the same time. The coppery taste had him licking his lips and sucking in a harsh breath.

God help him, but everything was so damn fuzzy...

"How much does he know?" came the words that seemed to drift in and out of his consciousness. Sai was leaning over him now; his dark hair flat upon his head and that pale visage looking a little paler.

_You don't look so good, Shin-chan. What the hell happened to you...to us...?_

"Not much," Sai admitted. He seemed to be wheezing a little, as if trying to catch his breath as well. "I wanted to see how far I could take this mission, get to play around with you a little, before revealing everything. I guess he got tired of waiting and sent those two fools to check up on me. So, you could say that they do know you're here in Buk-gu, and if those two don't report back on time...there's going to be plenty more of them coming after you and your little pathetic group."

_No...no...I...I...have to...warn...everyone..., _Haku thought frantically, but he couldn't move. His body felt so damn heavy and useless.

"I have stock piles of information on every single one of you, and now that I'm done with this little charade, I guess my job is officially done. I'm going to send the files to Kimimaro-sama first thing in the morning and then take care of your little friends first while they sleep peacefully. It will be especially gratifying taking care of Sasuke."

"...you...bastard," Haku whispered.

"Thank you," Sai replied as he reached out to caress Haku's face in a motion that was nothing short of loving. Haku felt like biting it off, if he could only move his fucking head. "You really are beautiful, Yuki Haku. From the moment I met you, I thought we could be the best of friends, but I saw the light with Orochimaru-sama as my mentor, and I believed you'd remain loyal to him."

To Haku's horror, Sai's lips descended to claim his in a kiss that made his stomach churn. He squeezed his eyes shut and with all the anger within him, made an attempt to bite him. Sai pulled away with a light chuckle.

"Knew you were going to try to do that," he replied with a gentle slap on Haku's cheek. "Now then...don't go dying on me. I have to take care of those bodies and then I'll be back for you."

Haku, to his helpless anger and frustration, felt the tears coming to his eyes as he heard Sai rising to his feet. He pictured Sasuke-sama's worried countenance, wishing now he had just taken the damn bus back to the apartment and spared himself the agony of defeat. He could hear Naruto-kun's warning again, and wished oh-so-very much that the blond would suddenly appear to rescue him. He could picture Karin-chan's tearful visage, and his heart broke a million times over because he would never get the chance to see her again.

_Life...is...so...unfair..._

**BANG!**

_What the...?_

The deafening sound of the gunshot had Haku's eyes widening in fear and panic. He turned his head a little to see what was taking place, nearly gasping in disbelief at the sight before him.

_The junkie!_

Sai was on a knee; a hand against his stomach as he looked up at the attacker with venom in his eyes. He was trying to rise to his feet again to reach for the woman who didn't really look like she knew what she was doing.

_Un...believable...I don't fucking believe it. _Haku wanted to scream at her to run, but his throat felt thick with congealed blood. He could barely utter a whisper.

"You...you bit...bitch," Sai wheezed as he took a step forward. "You're next. I swear when I get to you..."

**BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!**

And amidst her wild shooting, while Sai's body danced in rhythm to each bullet puncturing his flesh, the junkie kept screaming and crying at the same time as if unable to control the weapon in her hands. She didn't stop until the dry clicks revealed she had emptied the chamber, and only then did her fingers finally slack off to drop the smoking gun to the ground. She fell to her knees and wailed to the heavens, visibly trembling and shivering until her stoned companion staggered up to provide comfort the best way she knew how.

Haku was in a daze of disbelief. The whore must have probably been a friend of theirs and though they had given the air of not being aware of their surroundings, they must have witnessed Sai's murders all the same. Mercifully, at least one of them was aware enough to take action while they had been too preoccupied fighting.

_My savior. I thank you from the bottom of my heart even though you probably don't care about that._

Haku's gaze drifted to the still body, which had only moments earlier felt warm and very much alive beneath his hands. The tears he had reserved for the possible loss of his family escaped his eyes slowly as he took in the insipid visage a few feet away. In death, Sai looked no older than a child; a child warped and forced to grow up in a world of darkness only Orochimaru-sama could conceive.

And yet despite Sai's words, Haku knew there had to be a little good in him left. After all, he had 'protected' them all this time indirectly. By keeping the truth away from Kimimaro, he had allowed them to enjoy their 'freedom' for as long as they could thought it had been for his selfish interests. He would like to believe that though Sai had been lying all this time with his supposed interest and attraction to Haku, those little moments when caught off guard (the joy of winning a game at the arcade, the awestruck expression on his visage while watching the show at the museum, the delight he received from tasting something sweet)...all of those showed signs of the Shin Sai had been so desperate to keep locked away within his heart.

_I'm so sorry, Shin-chan. I really, really am..._

Unfortunately, whatever else he might have thought about was woven in the sudden cobweb of darkness to overwhelm him.

When he came to, he had no idea where he was for a second until a chill went through his bones almost making his teeth chatter. Blinking slowly, he realized he was still in the alley, and luckily, the rain had finally become a light drizzle. His body felt numb, his mouth and jaw still aching from the blow he had received. With an effort, he turned to look around him, wondering if the junkies were still there. Fortunately not, though from the upturned pockets and emptied bags, it was clear they had been searching for money amongst the dead bodies.

_Typical,_ Haku thought dryly. He almost wanted to laugh, but the effort was too much. All the same, he knew he couldn't remain here a minute longer. Someone was bound to come walking past soon, will notice the bodies and then alert the police. He had to get out of here and warn the others...but first...

"Urgh," he grunted as he tried to sit up. The _jutte_ was still protruding from his abdomen, the dark stain around it a sign of how much blood he had lost so far.

_All right...you can do this...just one hard yank and it will be all over. _

He wrapped his cold and numb fingers around the handle of the weapon, grit his teeth, squeezed his eyes shut and counting inwardly to ten, he took in a deep breath (even that was an effort in itself) and tugged as hard as he could. The pain had him collapsing back to the ground, and he had to bite his lower lip hard to control the scream that would have escaped him. Trembling fingers released the _jutte_ to the ground in a clatter, and after ten minutes of trying to even his breathing and waiting for the world to stop swimming, he tried to sit up again.

Ten minutes later, he had only managed to get onto his hands and knees, but it was enough for him to drag his bag, stuff its contents within and reach for Sai's bag as well. The junkies had scattered his art book, pencils and sketches to the wind, but with diligent (and quite the slow process), Haku picked every single thing up including a wallet that had been ransacked. In addition was a set of keys which could be beneficial except he really had no idea where Sai lived if they were indeed keys to his apartment. He took the weapons as well and would have turned away when he remembered the ring.

He hated having to do this, but he had to remove all evidence of Sai's association with them or Byaku-Shinkyou. The harder it was to find out about his death and identify his body, the better. It would buy them more time, he thought as he dug into Sai's jacket to begin searching. Praying the junkies hadn't taken it away, Haku finally felt the heavy piece of jewelry buried within an inner lining of the cloth. There were two of them, and Haku tucked those away in his bag.

"All right," he panted as he looked around him in case he missed anything. "Got it all...I think."

He managed to drape both bags around his shoulders, before staggering to his feet and clutching onto the wall for support. The top of his jeans was soaked through with not only the rain but his blood. He could literally feel some of it running down his legs and into his sneakers. He knew he would look a fright if he went out onto the street, but it was probably late in the evening now, and if he was lucky he wouldn't catch the attention of any officers on patrol or inquisitive onlookers.

It took him a good twenty minutes to finally get to a street that would have taken him five minutes to reach an hour or so ago. He literally used the wall to walk, dragging himself or sagging against it when his legs trembled or his knees gave way. As predicted, there weren't a lot of people on the roads at this hour, and when he got to the bus stop...

(probably missed the last bus anyway)

...he all but hugged the pole with the sign to catch his breath. He was rapidly losing his vision again and felt the strength draining from him.

_I don't know how much longer I can hang on..._

"Oy...oy! _Neo gwaen chanh ni?_"

Someone was in his face, someone looking at him with concern and pointing at the bloody footprints trailing after him.

_Don't shout so loud,_ he wanted to say to this person. _I can't understand what you're saying anyway. I'm Japanese. I no speakee Hangul._

This suddenly seemed ridiculously funny to him. He tried to laugh, but all that came out was a choked sob. He would pass out just as the sound of a car screeching to a halt beside the curb would coincide with strong arms capturing him before he hit the ground.

_Darkness...welcome darkness..._

It was okay this way after all. God knows he was so fucking tired of _everything_.

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke:<em>

"Here. It's the only thing good enough from the vending machine. I couldn't understand what the other drinks were."

I looked up with lashes that felt heavy. Naruto was standing over me with a can of black coffee, which I accepted with little to no intention of drinking it. Still I popped the lid open and took a gulp, grimacing at the bitter taste to coat my tongue. Fitting in the grand scheme of things. It _should_ be bitter. Nothing ought to ever taste sweet on my lips again. Absolutely nothing at all. I gripped the can tightly with trembling fingers and stared blindly at the worn linoleum floor.

_If only...if only...if only..._

I felt Naruto sit beside me on the bench and stretch out his legs. There were still blood stains on his pants and shirt like a child's morbid paint job; blood from a young man we both loved in our own way. The realization that we had almost lost him, that if Jae Weong's friend hadn't made the decision to head down that street (on a whim as he said) Haku might be...might be...

"Fuck," I whispered thickly as I threw my head back and covered my eyes with an arm.

I had been in too much shock at the sight of him at the time; too stunned to do much but follow Naruto's instructions (amazing how in charge he had been at the time) as he carried Haku's comatose body into the van while I placed the phone call to Dr. Woo. The good doctor hadn't even questioned our decision to call him at such an ungodly hour, and had rushed down to meet us at his clinic with his wife (who was a nurse) in tow. Haku was immediately ushered in for outpatient surgery, which is where we still are over an hour later as they continue to work on him.

I swallowed the hard lump that came to my throat, ashamed as I felt something hot and wet trickle down my cheek despite my pathetic attempt to hide my misery. I tried to force myself to stop, but it seemed like the more I tried to do so, the faster they fell. I was never gladder that Karin and the others were in the main waiting room. If they saw me like this...

"It's not your fault, Sasuke," came the quiet words that had me capturing my lower lip between my teeth. A part of me wanted to yell at him to "shut up" that he could never understand how I felt, but I couldn't trust myself to speak even if I wanted to. My throat was still too fucking tight and the stupid tears wouldn't stop.

This was so unlike me.

"Sasuke..."

He tried to reach for me, but I pushed him off roughly. Like a stubborn mule and not to be deterred he tried again, and this time my push was weak and ineffectual. When he finally managed to lower my arm from my eyes, much to my embarrassment, he leaned closer still to kiss their corners tenderly. I lowered my lashes and submitted to whatever the hell he wanted, too numb and emotionally spent to protest much. Silently, softly, gently, he kissed every drop away, not stopping until all that remained were pleasant tingles of the places his lips and tongue had caressed. I lifted my lashes to look at him, wondering what he was seeing in this moment; a weak, pathetic shadow of the bastard he had met all those months ago.

"I..." I sniffled and took a deep breath before speaking again; glad to find my voice was now a little firmer. "I don't need your pity."

"Who's giving it to you?" he whispered with a small smile. I could see the dark circles beneath his eyes and it hit me that he too was suffering over this, although he had managed to be more in control of his emotions than I have. I cradled his neck and pulled him to me, but only to place a hard kiss upon his forehead...and then lips (like I could resist) before pushing his head gently against my chest so he could rest. He more than welcomed my gesture for his arm wrapped around my waist and he snuggled even closer to me with a soft sigh escaping his lips.

We remained in this position for goodness knows how long. My lashes were growing heavier, my head nodding every now and then as I struggled to stay awake and from the light snore below me as well as the gradual sag of his body, I knew Naruto was already dozing off.

What a day we've had...and what stories would Haku have to tell if he made it.

We had waited the extra hour for his return, and though Itachi had called back, it was only to apologize for the phone being cut off as the train had gone through a tunnel at the time. He promised he'd call first thing in the morning (and considering it was almost four right now he was bound to be calling us soon) to hear any news about Haku. Until then, we had the task of searching all over the fucking city for his whereabouts. We had no idea where to begin, but Jae Weong had called on his friend to assist. We had taken the van to retrace our steps starting from the arcade, which was the last place we had left them. We drove around for seemingly hours (at least it seemed that way to me) while Naruto and Cha Sueng stopped to ask people if they had noticed Haku or Sai around the area. With every passing minute with no sign or anyone knowing who we were talking about, I went through stages of anger, frustration, panic and ultimately fear.

Yes, _fear_.

For though I knew of Haku's ability to take care of himself, we were hardly in a city or place where he could be comfortable fighting as freely as he could. I didn't think he would have taken enough weapons with him, and if he listened to my advice, my hope was that he wouldn't stick around to even get into a damn fight in the first place. Turns out he must have probably been taken by surprise or tried to escape and couldn't.

Death has always been a concept I had embraced since I was a child. It was inevitable and we all had to face it sooner or later. After watching my parents' mindless executions, everything else seemed inconsequential and ritualistic to me. Those I executed had no back stories to me. I did not see them as humans. They were simply sinners that had to be purified. Why should I give a damn about my job to rid them of their burdens on this earth?

And yet tonight that staunch concept of Death I had always carried within me was questioned and shaken in a way I never expected. Tonight, I had almost lost someone who I cherished and had come to see as more than a servant. I found myself remembering the little things about Haku from the moment I became aware of him as an actual 'human'. Seems harsh of me, but that was how I was after all. No one else was worth my time unless they were of beneficial importance to me, and yet for some reason, I had chosen him to remain by my side until my dying day. I would never forget the look on his face the moment I made my decision; the inexplicable joy and happiness he had tried so much to hide for fear Orochimaru would assume he was that eager to leave his side. How could I ever forget his child-like wonder at everything I taught him, how he seemed to hang onto my every word, how he rather die than see me suffer.

Tonight I hadn't been there for him when he needed me the most, and I could never forgive myself if it turns out that he didn't –

"Phew. All done here," came the sound of a familiar voice that had even Naruto sitting up immediately, all thoughts of sleep erased.

We rose to our feet, my heart racing as I noticed the smile on Dr. Woo's face. He was still dressed in his surgical scrubs and though he looked weary, there was a sense of satisfaction about him.

"That kid is one amazing human being," Woo said with a nod toward the door he had just stepped out from. "All logical reasoning says he should have been out cold with how much blood he lost, but we were lucky to have just two extra bags of O left in our supplies to begin a transfusion. The surgery went well, and he should be right as rain in the morning. Well as right as he can be after all he's been through."

My knees trembled and if it wasn't for Naruto suddenly reaching out to wrap an arm around my waist, I would have probably sagged to the floor in relief. I stupidly felt like bursting into tears again, but this time did a good job holding them at bay.

"...stay overnight and be monitored," Dr. Woo was saying as he led the way through another set of doors which took us to a small room adjacent to his office. Since this wasn't supposed to be a 'hospital', it was clear this space had been transformed into a patient room, where its lone occupant lay amidst sheets of white with tubes and IV lines seemingly poking out of every pore in his body.

Naruto and I walked closer to the bed to stare at the sleeping figure in silence. Besides the tubes and monitoring equipment, the bandages on his cheeks and how pale he looked, it was still our Haku – alive and breathing, but appearing even more child-like and innocent in repose. The fierce urge to protect him was nearly overwhelming, and as if in a daze, I reached out to caress his face. He didn't stir, but then again, I wasn't expecting him to.

"You don't mind if I do the same, do you?" Naruto asked softly.

"Idiot," I retorted with no venom as I met the cheeky smile on his visage. "Like you need my permission for something like that."

He blew me a kiss, much to my embarrassment and Dr. Woo's amusement, before leaning down to mimic my earlier actions. In addition, he squeezed Haku's hand gently before releasing him.

"I'll leave you boys alone with him," Dr. Woo said with a nod. "I'll go tell the others the good news, eh?"

"Thank you so much again for everything," I said with the deepest of bows in respect, which Naruto reciprocated. "You have no idea how much this means to us."

Woo seemed taken aback at our words, and actually blushed before he shook his head and waved a hand in dismissal. "What kind of a doctor would I be if I refused to save this young man's life? Besides, I only did half the work, the rest was up to him and he seems to have a will to live. So all kudos to our brave warrior here. Now then...I'll go tell the others and I'm sure they'll want to stop by as well. Do you want anything to eat? My wife is about to warm up something in the break room. We can call it an early, early, early morning breakfast."

"We're fine," I replied with a small smile. "Thank you for your offer."

"Well, you know where to find me if you need me." He left the room with a playful wink, allowing Naruto and I to turn our attention back to the sleeping figure on the bed.

"Guess this means we can't leave just yet," Naruto eventually said quietly as I pulled up a chair close to the bed. "Jiraiya's gonna be here in the morning and with what Itachi said or must have told him, you know he's gonna want us to leave ASAP." He looked at me with concern. "Haku can't leave the country in this state. He at least needs a day or more to recuperate."

I nodded softly. "I know. We are damned if we stay any longer. I'm not sure what happened tonight, so for all we know, Sai might still be out there."

"...but Haku had two bags with him, remember? Whose bag is it?"

I sat up at that, recalling that indeed Haku had another bag in addition to the one he usually went out with. "Where are they?" I asked quickly.

"I think Woo took them..." Naruto began as he looked around the room, only for him to give a small cry of victory as he noticed the bin in the corner where Haku's personal belongings had been kept. Both were wet and still had blood stains on them, which we tried to wipe away with paper napkins and water from the small sink.

I had the 'other' bag and with a soft nod from Naruto, opened it to withdraw its contents. Sketch and art pads that were damp and close to disintegrating with just a touch, pencils, brushes and erasers, a set of keys, a wallet with no money but an ID that just about told us who the bag belonged to.

"Damn," Naruto whispered as a possible story of what must have happened began to weave slowly in my mind. "Sai's stuff."

I stared at the pale face and felt the bubbling rage within the pit of my stomach. If it turns out that this son-of-a-bitch was the one responsible for putting Haku in this state, I vowed he would live to take another breath when I found him. I tucked the wallet into my back pocket and would have turned away, when something else caught my attention. Almost hidden at the bottom of the bag were two heavy gold rings with familiar crests that had my blood chilling immediately. I had only seen this once and that was on Kimimaro. These were the rings given to members of Orochimaru's elite forces, and since they looked quite big, it was clear these had not belonged to Sai. How had he gotten possession of them? Were there others after all? And if so, just how many more were out there looking for them? Watching and waiting for the opportunity to strike?

"Sasuke?" Naruto called out tentatively. "What's wrong?"

I looked into the concerned blue eyes and opened my mouth to tell him the significance of my findings, but at that moment Karin and the others were making their way in; forcing me to hide the rings within the pocket of my shirt with a motion to Naruto that I would tell him everything later.

* * *

><p>By five-thirty, most of us were fast asleep. Karin and Temari lay on the floor on sheets and pillows provided by Woo's wife. Shikamaru was dozing off on a chair beside the window, while Naruto and I slipped out quietly to talk in the hallway.<p>

"You sure you don't want me to get you something decent to eat?" he asked as he stretched his arms above his head and shook himself to get rid of the cobwebs of sleep.

"I'll be fine," I replied. "I want to be around when he wakes up."

"Yeah, it's probably your face he'll want to see first anyway," Naruto teased.

"Uh huh, and immediately he's done seeing my face, it will be "where's Naruto-kun? I want to see Naruto-kun that I love." Blech." I pretended to throw up and he nudged me hard in the ribs for that, though he was blushing in embarrassment.

"Shut the fuck up and tell me already about those rings you hid in your pocket."

I nodded and withdrew them, holding them up to the light so he could see the intricate design. "I have seen Kimimaro wearing this before and often wondered what it was all about. There's an inscription inside, which you may not understand. It's a code officers use to pass messages to one another and it pretty much translates to 'justice of the highest order'. Those who wear these rings are members of the elite forces."

"And Sai has two of them?"

"I don't think they belong to him. Sai's a pretty skinny guy, and he wouldn't dare wear this in public. These look much wider and a little worn out."

Naruto's eyes narrowed in thought. "There are others then?"

"Probably," I replied carefully. "Though the thing is...how and why would Sai have their rings?"

"Guess we'll never know until Haku wakes up." He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair restlessly. "Damn it." He paused and then snapped his fingers. "You know what? I'm gonna go back to the place we found him yesterday and try to retrace his steps. Maybe there's bound to be a clue about what happened last night."

"When are you going to do that? You have to wait for Itachi's call and Jiraiya to arrive, right?"

"Wouldn't take less than five minutes if Cha Seung is driving me there."

I bit my lower lip.

"What?" he asked when he noticed my expression.

"I don't want to sound like a broken record, but I really would rather you just go straight back to the apartment, Naruto." I tried not to sound too worried. "If there are others, it's likely they'll be at the scene as well to piece together what happened. They might even be on watch. Be...be careful, that's all."

He smiled softly and took a step closer to me. Resting his forehead against mine, he gave a slight nod of understanding.

"Fine," he agreed quietly. "I'll go straight home, and I'll call you when I arrive so you won't be such a goddamn worrywart."

"Shut up," I protested with a light punch to his chest. "You'd be saying the same thing if I was in your position."

"Well it's a good thing you aren't because knowing you, you probably won't obey me."

"...you really won't go there, will you?"

"I won't. I promise." He kissed me hard and would have pulled away, but I refused to let him go so quickly. I tugged him back to me and seized his lips in a kiss that spoke of my concern, my doubts, my fears, and my deep-seeded longing for him. His moan or mine or both of ours mingled within the clash of our tongues and gentle scrap of teeth; the flavor of the coffee we had drank earlier potent as we deepened our new brand of communication.

"Come back to me," I whispered thickly against his lips when we finally broke apart for air. "Do you hear me? Come back to me, Naruto, or I will _never_ forgive you."

I held his gaze prisoner, forcing him to understand just how serious I was. Somehow we both knew that my 'warning' wasn't just about simply going back to the apartment and returning later. It meant so much more than that, and having to say goodbye all over again eventually, was going to be so much harder than I possibly imagined.

"I'll come back, Sasuke," Naruto whispered in a voice that sounded raw and torn from the depths of him. It almost seemed as if he was doing his best not to get emotional for some reason, and as I closed my eyes in weary satisfaction, I allowed his words to resonate within my heart long after he was gone.

"_I promise I'll return."_

* * *

><p><strong>Translation:<strong>

Neo gwaen chanh ni? – Are you all right?


	34. 34: Shifting Tides

**Notes: **Well hello there, strangers. Seems like it's been eons since I stopped by. What can I say? Life's been a bitch; when it gives you lemons, you have to make lemonade, eh? So for such a long absence, you get 'two' chapters for the price of one! You can consider this chapter the end of the 'Second Arc' and we are now about to enter the third and final arc.

**Warnings:** Adult content ahead. Do not read with the kiddies or your boss in the vicinity.

Enjoy and thanks for sticking around and being so patient with me. (((hugs)))

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><p><strong>Chapter 34<strong>

**Shifting Tides**

_The depths of the hearts  
>Of humankind cannot be known.<br>But in my birthplace  
>The plum blossoms smell the same<br>As in the years gone by._

_**Ki no Tsurayuki**_

* * *

><p><em>Byaku-Shinkyou:<em>

He stared at the coded printout with growing distaste in his mouth, fingers clutching the piece of paper so tight it threatened to rip in half with the pressure being inflicted upon it. There had never been any cause to doubt Sai's devotion and loyalty to his role as a member of Orochimaru's secret watchdog team (his impressive track record was more than enough proof). However, one had to wonder just _what_ the hell that young man was thinking (or _doing_ for that matter) with the cryptic and vague reports he had been sending in so far.

_Mistaken targets today. Surveillance continued._

_Intercepted calls reveal no 'outside' communication at this time. _

_Will update 0530hrs._

Time and time again, it was the same thing: "No new updates/nothing much to report" or worse yet, Sai would give a blasé rundown of all the boring activities _he_ had done in his quest to be close to the supposed targets' whereabouts. In summary, besides the knowledge that Sasuke and his cohorts were probably in Buk-gu, South Korea, Kimimaro knew next to nothing about what was _really_ going on. Three weeks on the mission and this was all he had to work with!

_Frustrating!_

It was why he had made the last minute decision to send Ginkaku and Kinkaku – two fellow members of the secret police – to spy on Sai. Both huge and intimidating at first glance, the Honshū-bred brothers were a cohesive veteran unit that guaranteed results when put to the task. They were yet to fail a mission and Kimimaro's hope was that they'd be able to observe, not just Sai's actions, but the others as well and to deliver the information he desperately required.

Though Orochimaru had not authorized this move, Kimimaro knew that his master's loud silence on the matter was nothing more than an admonishment at the failure (so far) of this so-called mission. If Kimimaro was unable to produce anything worthwhile within the next week, he had no doubt Orochimaru would take matters into his hands and send in a troop to wipe them out without a second thought.

He was becoming more and more restless (volatile), his impatience revealed in his latest order to burn down a small village just off the coast where he 'believed' several members of the Uchiha clan resided. Despite Kimimaro's concern that the report they had received from the spy was nothing more than pure speculation, Orochimaru wasn't one to take any chances. In his mind, he was sure that the remaining Uchiha (some of whom were still in hiding all over the country) were now building an army against him; an army that would arrive any day now to destroy his daily fortified fortress.

_He is slowly going insane,_ Kimimaro thought bitterly, but not without a trace of fear in his heart. Orochimaru's actions had always been deliberate and well thought out in the past, but it seemed that recently he was prone to making rash and questionable decisions. It took so little to set him off these days, and though Kimimaro had been spared being used as a 'punching bag' in the bedroom to vent off his frustrations, it still didn't lessen the uneasiness he felt whenever in the older man's presence.

_One day he'll finally snap and I'll be the one being buried in the mass grave in the mountains. It's only a matter of time._

He shuddered at the thought and shook his head lightly. It was why he had to make sure Gin and Kin returned with some kind of information that would make this all a little more bearable. He had to give Orochimaru something or else –

"Ah, so this is where you are. Surprising."

Slipping the printout quickly beneath a pile of scrolls on the desk, he spun around with a frown on his features. To his chagrin, it was the smug-faced new recruit that Orochimaru had favored as his current bed partner; though from the stories he had heard so far, this Suigetsu was just as stubborn as Sasuke had been. His agitation grew as he watched the silver-haired man lean lazily against the screen door, hands tucked into the _obi_ of his kimono as he chewed absently on what looked like a long piece of grass. His hooded violet gaze traveled over the flushed features of the older man before an annoying smirk came onto his lips; as if perhaps aware of what Kimimaro was hiding.

Kimimaro loathed him even more.

"What do you want, Hōzuki?" he grated through clenched teeth.

"The frea...eh...Orochimaru sent me to get you," Suigetsu drawled. His lips parted to reveal razor-like teeth as he grinned. "Thought you'd be stuck with Jūgo as always, but guess not. Anyway...whatcha reading?"

"Get out of here," Kimimaro retorted icily. "You seem to forget your place, Officer." He spun back to face his desk, making a show of rolling up some scrolls. "Let Orochimaru-sama know I'll be there shortly."

He couldn't see Suigetsu's reaction, but it still didn't prevent the hairs at the back of his neck from prickling with awareness. He had no doubt the insolent fool was laughing silently.

"Sure, sure, whatever you say, boss," Suigetsu gloated before giving a low whistle as if in appreciation of something. "Hmm...nice night for a good fire, won't you say?"

Kimimaro, too aggravated to understand Suigetsu's random observation, rolled his eyes and gave an inner sigh. "Get out of my office, Hōzuki."

"All right, all right, I'm gone. Man. What's it gonna take to have a decent conversation around here?"

Gratefully, he didn't wait for an answer or Kimimaro was definitely going to let him have it. He waited until the shuffling feet faded away before relaxing shoulders he had not been aware were tensed all this time. He slid out the coded print-out and ripped it to shreds, but not before making a mental note to have a tele-conference with Gin and Kin tonight for an update.

Time was running out, and no one knew that better than Kaguya Kimimaro.

* * *

><p>Hidden within the shadows of the massive trees in the vicinity, Suigetsu watched him make his way across the compound and toward Orochimaru's quarters. He plucked the long piece of grass from his mouth and absently spat out the juices his chewing had formed on his tongue and teeth.<p>

_That fucking faggot,_ he thought bitterly with a roll of his neck to ease the muscles there. He caressed the hilt of his _katana_, imagining its sharp blade buried deep into a meaty portion of Kimimaro's flesh.

_His head...yeah, would have been a clean cut when he turned around back then... _

He spat again and ran his tongue across his teeth slowly, brows creasing in thought. Many an opportunity had presented itself to take out the bastard, but everything had to go according to plan, didn't it? However, he knew his anger was displaced, for his real fury was reserved for the freak-show known as Orochimaru.

He shuddered and bared his teeth at the memory of the first night spent in that man's bedroom.

Suigetsu had assumed Orochimaru had only wanted to ask him questions about his background and all that protocol shit. Akatsuki had trained them well enough to produce a believable and watertight tale that even one as astute as Orochimaru would be unable to poke holes through. Bracing himself for the interrogation, Suigetsu had instead found himself being offered (and considering how thirsty he was at the time) a sweet-tasting beverage, which he downed without questioning. Several minutes (hours?) later, he had woken up naked amongst silk sheets, blankets and the softest of pillows with a soreness in his lower region that was inexplicable.

Only when he tried to sit up (and damn if his head wasn't about to split in two), did he finally notice the caked maroon-colored blood which had run down the back of his thighs and to his shin. Considering he had a high tolerance for pain and been in his share of fights in the past, seeing his blood was nothing to be shocked about. It was _where_ it came from that had his insides turning icy and a fury unlike anything he had ever experienced superseding the flush of humiliation at what it implied.

He had been _violated_ in the _worst_ way possible.

That sick son-of-a-bitch had drugged him and taken his virginity...in the _ass_!

Orochimaru couldn't have chosen or thought of a better way to demoralize Suigetsu's spirit, except he had grossly underestimated his newest victim. Still under the effects of the drug, which made everything he did appear to be in slow motion, Suigetsu had mustered enough strength to reach for one of the ornate wooden decors beside the large bed (it looked like two snakes bowing in homage to each other) just as Orochimaru made the mistake of parting the sheer curtains around the four-poster bed to reveal himself. He was just fast enough to avoid a head-on collision with the flying object, but still suffered a deep gash to his temple before it smashed loudly into a table laden with silver and gold dishes. Pieces of meat and fish, fresh fruits and some congealed concoction he couldn't make out, scattered all over rich Persian rugs and created an unsightly mess that neither man noticed.

"You bastard," Suigetsu panted harshly. God, how weak and 'heavy' he felt. He tried to rise to his feet (or knees at least), but whatever drug this asshole had administered had him collapsing back to the bed in exhaustion.

"Every bit as fiery as I had imagined," Orochimaru drawled, while darting out a long tongue to lick away the trickle of blood that had flowed down to his lips. He grinned, a feral-like gesture that made Suigetsu's skin crawl in revulsion. "You almost remind me of Sasuke. His denials before giving into the pleasures of the flesh were always so laughable and delicious to see."

In a fluid motion, too fast for Suigetsu to see, that was until he felt the cold, slender fingers wrapped around his neck to begin squeezing. His eyes immediately watered while his lungs protested being stifled from its normal functions. He thrashed weakly, the world swimming before him as he struggled to break the tightening grip. For a second, he entertained the idea of being choked to death this way, of his naked, ass-raped body being found lying cold and damaged for the world to ridicule. That thought was enough to give him one last burst of energy to raise an arm high enough as to bury his fingernails into Orochimaru's upper arm. He raked the pale flesh as hard as he could, smiling inside as his nail beds immediately filled with the warmth of the freak's blood.

_No...not warm...fuck even his goddamn blood feels so fucking cold._

Unfortunately, it was a minor victory that was short lived, for darkness soon overwhelmed him as his body finally gave up the fight.

Suigetsu had no doubt his body had been ravaged again, but at least he was spared from being awake through the proceedings. Still, like a goddamn pet, Orochimaru had refused to let him go back to the Officers' Mess. He insisted that Suigetsu be in one of the spare rooms in his lavish quarters, and though he had assumed that Orochimaru would want him to warm his bed every other fucking night, Suigetsu was mercifully spared the torture. For a while now, Orochimaru seemed too preoccupied with things and simply used Suigetsu as an errand boy of sorts. Besides Suigetsu got the feeling Orochimaru had gone back to using Kimimaro for his weird bedroom activities, which was more than fine with him.

He scratched at a bite on his arm and spat again in displeasure. Being 'outside' like this was a rare opportunity in itself, and he was determined to make it worth his while. He would show that freak show a thing or two, for while Orochimaru had been busy buried in his problems, he was working hard behind the -

"Are you sure you want to go ahead with this?" came the sudden quiet question that had Suigetsu stiffening in response. He hadn't even heard Jūgo approach, but then again, for such a big guy, he could be incredibly light on his feet. He didn't need to turn around to know that Jūgo was behind him, hidden from view. It would give anyone passing by that both men were simply lounging against a tree and admiring the stars instead of engaging in conversation.

"Is everything set?" Suigetsu asked. He rubbed the grass between his fingers.

"Just about," Jūgo replied. "Kiba is putting the finishing touches...although..."

"...what?" Suigetsu asked impatiently.

"Itachi-san did not order this, did he?" Jūgo asked quietly. "What we're doing...if they trace it back to us -"

"They won't," Suigetsu retorted sharply. "It's going to look like a stupid accident by one of those goddamn prisoners. I don't know what Itachi's planning, but sitting around doing nothing ain't helping matters. We've already received the blueprints, so we know exactly the locations to target. We set some of those places on fire tonight, and Orochimaru's gonna cream his pants like the fucked up pansy he is. The more he builds, the more we destroy. End of story." Jūgo was spared from seeing the dangerous glint in Suigetsu's eyes. It almost made him look insane. "I'm gonna make that son-of-a-bitch pay in my own way."

"Yes, but -"

"You're not getting cold feet on me, are you?" Suigetsu asked with a hard edge in his tone. "Or has your relationship with that white-haired fairy muddled your brain already?"

There was a tense minute of silent before a barely audible "no" filled the air.

Suigetsu rolled his eyes and expelled a breath of frustration. "Dude. Do not forget why we were sent here in the first place. I know faggot boy's your best buddy and all, but Christ! He's the one responsible for killing half of everyone you know. Be his fuck buddy, get all the information you can from him, but don't get too emotionally attached and fuck this up for the rest of us. Got it?"

He pushed himself away from the tree and stretched his arms above his head. He stared into the night sky and allowed a cold smile to come to his lips. Screw Jūgo and his sentimental feelings. Nothing was going to prevent him from accomplishing his goals even if it involved a few scapegoats (sacrifices) in the process.

"Yep," he said with a firm nod and a big inhalation of breath. "Looks like the perfect night for a great big inferno. Burn, baby. _Burn!_"

* * *

><p><em>Naruto:<em>

Seeing Jiraiya was a shock to the senses in more ways than one.

I had assumed he'd be arriving later in the day, but stepping out of the van only to behold his intimidating yet inviting presence as he waited with Jae Weong at the entrance to the complex, created a flood of emotions that would have embarrassed me otherwise. That familiar shock of white lion mane hair, the dark eyes that seemed to know so much, those unexplainable red streaks on his cheeks, the small crooked smile, the ridiculous traditional garb he seemed insistent on wearing (wooden sandals included), and the way he waved at me in acknowledgement. Perhaps it was the pent up emotions of the past twenty-four hours finally gushing to the surface or maybe I was just a pathetic weakling deep down inside. Whatever it was, I threw all caution to the wind and found myself flying into his arms like a goddamn kid to hug the living daylights out of him.

Man, he smelled so good. Like...like...

(_being home again_)

I guess I took him by surprise (well yeah I doubt he was expecting that) thanks to the grunt he gave as I all but sent us toppling to the ground. I fully expected him to push me away, to tell me that I was behaving childishly and I ought to be more in control of myself, but nothing of the sort happened. Those strong arms wrapped around me in an embrace I had always longed for; a hug only a _father_ could give and one that was denied to me since the day I was born.

Helplessly, I sobbed against his chest; hard and fast the tears wouldn't stop as I _finally_ let it all out. Like a really bad horror movie, the events of the past night rushed through my mind in rapid clips. I could still see Haku's bloodied body as we finally found him at the bus stop, could still feel how cold and _fragile_ he had felt in my arms, could recall how much I prayed that we had made it in time, and the endless agonizing wait as Dr. Woo performed surgery. There was so much I wanted to tell Jiraiya, but the words remained stubbornly lodged in my throat and wouldn't budge.

I didn't quite catch what he said to Jae Weong, but with a gentle squeeze of my shoulders, he led me into the building and away from any prying eyes. In the elevator, he kept his arms around me; not letting me go until we came to my apartment and requested for my keys.

"Let's get you cleaned up at least," he said once we were in the safety of a room that felt almost alien to me. Seems like a damn eternity since I was last in it. "Those blood stains look morbid, eh?"

His smile had me nodding and sniffling. I tried to manage a matching expression, but I now felt hollow, drained and downright exhausted. I hadn't slept all night, only being able to catch a light doze on the drive back to the apartment and that was it. Still, I obeyed without an argument and soon found myself alone in the bathroom to muddle through the events of the past few hours all over again.

_Surreal._

A day that had started out with good intentions - in making sure Haku was safe - had turned out to be the exact opposite. I guess I could see why Sasuke was feeling so much guilt over it because I felt partly responsible as well. If he hadn't sent Haku on the 'date' in the first place, if I hadn't shown up to mess up his plans, if Yoona hadn't shown up to disrupt our stake-out at the arcade, if we hadn't left those two with the naïve assumption that everything would turn out okay without our butting in...Haku might be with us right now giving us a rundown of how his day had gone instead of lying in a bed stuck with IVs and doing his best to survive.

_Shit!_

I pounded my thigh with a fist; hard enough to have me biting my lower lip to stifle my cry of pain. So yes, the litany of 'what ifs' could go on until I turned blue in the face, but what good would it do to sit here moping over what might or might not have been? Haku was at least still alive –

(for now)

...and there was no doubt information he carried with him that would be beneficial to knowing who and what Sai was really all about. One thing was for sure though, Sai was most definitely dead. Cha Seung had returned to the scene of the crime (while we were at the clinic) and told me he had spotted five dead bodies in the alley. His descriptions had included three other men, a woman and then Sai. Were the three men a member of Sai's team? Had they been sent as well to spy on us? And if so, just how many more were there probably now seeking our heads? Cha had reassured me that there was no one else he had noticed in the alley at the time, but at this hour, there was no way folks who lived in the buildings around the area wouldn't notice the carnage before the police were involved.

_We are no longer safe here._

Wasn't that what Itachi had said on the phone yesterday? With Jiraiya here, there was no denying the urgency for us to be on the next boat back to Japan. I had no idea how Haku's condition would make this possible, but I did have a feeling that my time (at least) was bound to be up soon. If Jiraiya was ready to take me away first...who was I to say no?

/ Come back to me. Do you hear me? Come back to me, Naruto, or I will _never_ forgive you. /

I felt the rush of heat creep up my neck to suffuse my features as Sasuke's impassioned plea (order) filled my mind. It was yet another reminder of just how 'close' we had become in the past few hours all thanks to this incident. Ironic that it would have to take someone we both cared about getting hurt to make us realize just how much we needed each other after all. If I tried to take the positive out of the night, it would be that leaving Sai and Haku alone had given Sasuke and me the opportunity to finally get things out in the open. I had no idea if my declaration to give us another chance meant that he was now technically my 'boyfriend' -

(sounds fucking weird to be honest)

But whatever it was between us, I liked it even more now. The way he had allowed me to hold him at the clinic and to comfort him in his time of grief, had revealed a side of Sasuke I didn't know was possible. Maybe it was indeed due to the enormity of the situation that he was willing to give in so easily, or I'm sure in normal circumstances, Hell would freeze over before he allowed me to see him crying or going as far as kissing his damn tears away. That was the sort of stuff you did for the ladies to make them feel better. There was no manual that said the same routine would work for the guys, but hey! so far so good.

/ Come back to me... /

"I will," I whispered into the silence broken only by the solemn _drip drip drip_ of the faucet and my feet sliding against the wet tiles gently. "I promise...when this whole thing is over, I'll come back to you, Sasuke."

Little would I know how true my statement would turn out to be, for Jiraiya did not mince words once I was back in the apartment, dressed and now eating a sandwich he had whipped up from somewhere.

"I have spoken to Itachi about the situation," he mused with a light frown on his features. He was sitting across me on the floor, arms folded across his broad chest. "And we both agreed that you and I will have to leave for Kyoto first thing in the morning...tomorrow morning that is."

The sandwich felt like it was going the wrong way and I had to pound my chest hard to get it down to my stomach. When I felt I could breathe again, I managed to squeak out a dumb "Huh?" to which he nodded and repeated himself.

"I know it's sudden, but slow and easy does it with the transition. As you well know, Haku cannot leave at this time, so the plan is to keep him here with Karin and Shikamaru -"

"Shikamaru's coming with me," I interrupted with a firm nod. Jiraiya raised a brow but only gave a light shrug as if he had been expecting this.

"Fine," he continued, while rubbing his chin in thought. "You and Shikamaru will leave with me first thing tomorrow morning before the break of dawn. The next night, Kisame will be here to pick up Sasuke."

"Kisame?"

"He's a good friend of Itachi and Shisui's...a very valuable member of Akatsuki. They should be heading to Tokyo to meet up with his brother and whatever plans they have from there will be established. When Haku is awake enough, then we'll send for the trio to meet up with Itachi in Tokyo as well." He leaned toward me, those dark eyes earnest and intense. "When we get to Kyoto, I will do my best to groom you properly before you have your rendezvous with Danzo. I know Sergei has taught you as best he could, but it's what's up here." He tapped his temple gently. "That will have to be strengthened a little more."

He must have noticed my panic -

/ _To become an assassin is to be devoid of any human emotion when it comes to a kill. Leave all regrets and doubts before you begin a mission. You have one task and only one opportunity to eliminate the target with zero room for error. A mind clear and free from any and all convoluted thoughts is crucial. Be as still and in control as the weapon within your hands. Remember – at all times – that you are an unseen presence to your target. You are the shadows. You are nothing but the wind. /_

...because he gave a small smile and reached out to tap my nose gently.

"It is not going to be easy, Naruto," he admitted ruefully. "People like you who have such good hearts deep down within and always try to see the good in others, it might take some getting used to...to become a callous human machine. However, just try to remind yourself that this is not going to be permanent, that you are only doing this to achieve a set goal and you must fight and struggle against the forces of darkness that might become too much of a temptation if you fall in too deep. True strength doesn't come from just knowing how to wield a sword or shoot a gun. It comes from here." He tapped my chest gently. "And here." My forehead was tapped as well. "Use both wisely and you'll succeed, all right?"

I nodded and chewed thoughtfully on my meal; my mind already racing with the incoming scenarios and possibilities. In a short period of time, I'll be back in my homeland, but no longer a fugitive. I'll become something I had once cringed about and loathed with a passion, but as Jiraiya had said, I had a reason for doing this.

A damn good reason.

Unfortunately, there was something else that nagged at the back of my mind even as I felt the first stirrings of adrenaline coursing through me.

Saying farewell to Sasuke.

Thanks to Jiraiya's announcement, my naïve assumption that we'd all be leaving at the same time had been burst like a bubble. Knowing now that I had less than twenty-four hours to get myself together and prepare for the long trip back home, knowing that it might take weeks, months, or hell, years! (though I sincerely hoped it wouldn't be that long) before I ever saw him again, made something within my chest tighten.

It would only make sense that the both of us couldn't be seen together when we were back in Japan as folks were bound to realize we were 'working' as a team. With Danzo's apparent dislike and wariness about Orochimaru and, of course, Akatsuki, my decision to join his organization was pretty much a guarantee that I was now going to become Akatsuki's _enemy_. They would be on my number one target list which would mean –

"...might have to kill them," I muttered as the horror of the reality hit me like a ton of bricks.

"What's that you said?" Jiraiya asked with a raised brow. He was in the process of lighting up his pipe.

I bit my lower lip and lowered my gaze to the _tatami_ mat. "I said...if this works out...Danzo might want me to start killing off members of Akatsuki, the very people I'm supposed to be working and helping as a double spy or whatever."

Jiraiya gave a soft nod of understanding; his eyes filled with regret. "It is an unfortunate reality, but I have no doubt Itachi and Shisui will make plans to see that your 'killings' are not in vain."

I looked up with my brows furrowed in bemusement. "I don't get it."

Jiraiya puffed out a cloud of smoke. "In life, we have to make some very difficult decisions, Naruto. Your role as assassin of the Danzo faction is something we have all considered thoroughly. If you prove yourself resourceful enough, he will no doubt give you more targets related to Akatsuki's goals. You might be required to even take out members of parliament...in other words those that oppose Danzo's rise to power. Our hope is that it doesn't get to that point. We are banking on Danzo setting his sights on Ikegami first, hence you get your opportunity to deal with the _kumichō_ before taking on the other side of things. Even better...that you finally get your one-on-one confrontation with Danzo and eliminate him before he gives you the orders you'd rather not perform. Whichever scenario comes first, Naruto, it is going to be your decision – and difficult it may be – to pull the trigger."

I took a deep breath and nodded slowly. "I see..."

"Well nothing to worry your head about right now," Jiraiya interrupted with a light laugh and a slap of his hand upon my shoulder. Ouch! The guy doesn't know his own strength, does he? "You should try to get some sleep. I have a few phone calls to make. Oh, and where is Shikamaru? He needs to be told of the new developments."

"Still at the clinic," I replied. I did want to go back there to see how everyone was doing, but at the mention of "sleep", my brain was already responding to the sight of my comfortable rolled up futon and waiting pillows.

"All right then," Jiraiya stated as he rose to his feet and stretched his massive frame. "I'm on my way there. When I return tomorrow morning, it will be to take you back home." He gave a playful wink, tussled my hair roughly, and with a whistle of some obscure tune beneath his breath, he left the apartment with a quiet close of the door behind him.

_Home sweet home, eh?_

I spread out my bedding and sprawled upon it with a heavy sigh.

_More like "Welcome to Hell version 2.0."_

Still, I knew I'd have to make the best of it. I'd just have to stop by the clinic to say good bye to the others, especially Haku and of course Sasuke. Would suck to have to do that after we had finally established something good between us, but hey...when was life ever fair to either of us, hmm? If I was looking for a goddamn fairy tale, I knew I had stepped into the wrong place.

For Life – when the layers were truly peeled away and ripped apart – was really nothing more than a terrible _nightmare_.

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke:<em>

9:45am

Haku was still comatose.

I rubbed my eyes with the heels of my hands, forcing the prickles of sleep to the wayside. I was sitting on the chair Shikamaru had evacuated earlier (he and the girls had gone to get a bite to eat across the street), and since it was beside Haku's bed, I was allowed to observe him in repose. In the light of day, he didn't look quite as pale, and I was glad to see a light flush of colors on his cheeks...even better that his chest was rising and falling steadily.

(still alive)

Dr. Woo's wife had come in earlier to change the transfusion bags. He was fine with the pints of blood administered overnight, so all that was left to see how well he adjusted. Since the clinic wasn't usually open on Sundays anyway, it was a blessing that we wouldn't have to be bothered by other patients taking up Dr. Woo's time. Call me selfish, but Haku had to be top priority at this time.

On my lap, the two blood-stained bags he had carried with him sat like morbid reminders of the horror he must have experienced yesterday. I set his down to the floor and opened Sai's to observe its contents again. Besides the now barely distinguishable sketches on the torn pieces of paper, and some other art supplies, I reached for the wallet to investigate properly. Sai had an I.D. card that stated his fake name and a residential address.

(must have lived somewhere, right?)

And if he did live somewhere, it would mean that whatever information he had, regarding his mission, was kept in this place. The logical thing would be to go there and retrieve or at least search the place for any beneficial clues, but I was still wary about others being out there observing our every move. Naruto had wanted to search on his own, but I had talked him out of it. What good would it do me to go against my very warnings and concern?

The sound of the door opening had me looking up sharply. Shikamaru stuck his head in with a small smile. He held up a bottle of soda and a packaged meal, which looked like heaven to me (of course my damn stomach would choose to growl at this time). He noticed and gave a soft chuckle.

"Looks like someone needs it," he remarked as he stepped into the room and offered them to me. As I dug into the meal like a man deprived, I watched him study Haku's sleeping form.

"Cha Seung's outside," he finally said quietly. "We got to talking and he told me something pretty interesting."

"What's that?" I asked, shamelessly licking my fingers as the juices from the warm sandwich ran down slowly.

"Five dead bodies at the scene. Two big guys, broken arms and necks and one with the hand sliced off. Another guy...looked like a business man...shot to the neck...woman...probably a hooker...another broken neck...and Sai...beaten and then shot several times."

I froze. "Haku...did all that?" I simply couldn't picture Haku shooting anyone. He had never been comfortable using that weapon and would have rather dealt with a thousand throwing knives or even a _katana_ than resort to using a gun. So how...?

"Cha Sueng doesn't believe Haku did it, so I'm guessing there was someone else there at the time, another witness who finished the job."

"...someone who wanted Sai dead? Maybe another member of their organization?"

"Maybe...although you have to wonder why they wouldn't want to get rid of the bodies or finish off Haku. They wouldn't be that sloppy, would they?"

"Good point." I finished off the sandwich with an effort and eyed the I.D. card again. Shikamaru must have noticed it as well because he nodded toward it.

"That belong to Sai?"

"Yes." I looked at him, my intent suddenly clear. "I want to go to this address...to see if there's something I can find."

"What are you looking for?"

"He's been sending information to Orochimaru and Kimimaro, right? He might have documents that might be incriminating if found by the police. At least Haku had the presence of mind to get all identification from Sai's body before leaving the scene."

"Risky move. There might be others."

"I know that...which is why I want you with me."

Shikamaru raised a brow, his hands buried deep within the pocket of his pants. We had a stare down for almost a minute, as if he was studying me to make sure I wasn't shitting him about this. When he seemed satisfied that I was dead serious, he gave a curt nod.

"All right. I'm game. When do we leave?"

"Now is as good a time as any. Is Cha Sueng still out there?"

"Nah, he just left to pick up Jiraiya. He's bringing him here."

My stomach dropped at the sound of that name. I thought the man wasn't going to be here until tomorrow! His presence now could only mean -

_Shit!_

"He's here, huh?" I stated quietly. "So I guess..."

I couldn't finish as the reality of the situation began to hit home..._hard_. Jiraiya was only here for one reason. To take Naruto away.

"He's probably seen Naruto," Shikamaru finished for me, unaware of how funny my stomach felt or how painful it was now to breathe steadily. I masked my discomfort by focusing on my sugary beverage, trying not to think too much of the notion that my earlier farewell to Naruto might end up being the last time I see him.

"...just hope he remembers I'm supposed to be going with him," came the low mumble that had me looking at him warily.

"What?"

Shikamaru shrugged lightly. "I offered to go back home with Naruto. I've got a bone to pick with Danzo as well. I guess I didn't tell you the whole reason behind my arrest in the first place, did I?"

"No...I don't think you did." I tried to run through the memory banks to shift out Shikamaru's case file, but I was running a painful blank. However, I needn't have bothered because he settled into another chair and began to tell me the story about his association with the councilman who had become the bane of Ikegami and Danzo's existence. When he was through, I had to reluctantly admit that my respect for this man had gone up a notch. Just like Naruto and I, he too had gone through his brand of Hell on earth, and if this was the opportunity he needed to exact his revenge on those who destroyed all he held near and dear to him, then more power to him.

"Besides...I made a promise to Asuma," Shikamaru added with a wistful smile that had me biting my lower lip at the mention of my late mentor and friend. "I'd look after that blockhead even if it cost me my life." He rolled his eyes and pretended to look offended at this task, but I could tell it meant a lot to him –

(and to me too...at least I know someone I can trust is going to be by his side)

"Will you pose as an assassin too?" I queried before tossing the now empty bottle into the trash can. It nearly missed its target.

"I don't know yet," Shikamaru admitted with a purse of his lips. "I guess whatever role Jiraiya suggests I do is what I'll become. Just as long as I'm not too away from the action."

"I guess..."

"We're back!" came the somewhat cheerful greeting as the door opened to reveal Temari and Karin with items in several plastic bags.

"Is he awake yet?" Karin asked as she moved closer to the bed.

"If he wasn't, your scream would have done the job," I replied tightly, for which I got cuffed on the head for.

"I got some toiletries and a change of clothes for you," she retorted as she threw the bag on my lap. "Dr. Woo's got a bathroom adjacent to his office you can use. You should shave and take a shower or something. You look like hell."

It was thoughtful of her, and I really did appreciate her thinking of me in this way, but what could my damn mouth say instead of the words "thank you"?

"You look no better yourself," came the snappish words that had me mentally kicking myself. I really can be such a bastard, can't I? To spare the look of pain or disappointment she would have given me, I rose to my feet quickly, set both Sai and Haku's bags back into the closet before excusing myself. I found the bathroom easily enough, although it was so small, it could only fit a shower and a sink, and thirty minutes later, I felt like a new man. There were still dark rings around my eyes, but that was a small price of pay for my harrowing night.

All the same, it still didn't prepare me for the sight of the big man with the big voice, who must have arrived while I was cleaning up. Jiraiya was sitting in the lobby with Shikamaru across him, both engaged in such deep conversation, neither man noticed my presence. I took a step back and remained 'hidden' at the corner to eavesdrop.

"...will tell her about it," Shikamaru was saying with a light nod. "Kinda sudden, but it's too be expected."

"I hear you two were supposed to be married?"

"It can wait," came the quiet reply. "Besides, we don't really have to make it legal for anyone to know we're always going to be together, do we?"

Jiraiya gave a small smile. "That is true. All the same, I must thank you for being willing to be by Naruto's side. He will need a reminder of his humanity when all seems bleak and lost, and with you as a companion, I am leaving him in safe hands."

"Don't make me out to be some saint," Shikamaru replied with a cynical air, though the light flush on his cheeks told of how much Jiraiya's praise had meant to him. "I have no doubt it's going to be difficult, but I'll remain in the shadows as need be. You're right about Danzo possibility pitting him against me if he realized we worked together. It's best he doesn't know I exist."

"Hm." Jiraiya seemed to 'puff' himself out with a gush of air before clearing his throat. "And if you're done eavesdropping, young sir, perhaps you'd like to join us. I believe you and Mr. Naru here have an excursion you wish to make shortly?"

Blushing darkly at being caught, I stepped out to meet them, ignoring the smirk Shikamaru threw my way while bowing in greeting to Jiraiya. "He told you about Sai?"

"Cha Sueng filled me in for the most part," Jiraiya admitted as I sat next to Shikamaru. "But Shikamaru here tells me that you both plan to visit this address on Sai's I.D. Do you think that's wise?"

"No," I admitted bluntly. "But in order to make sure we cover all our tracks, it's a risk we're going to have to take. I have no intention of leaving Buk-gu without making sure that we confiscate or destroy anything he has on us. There were keys in the bag as well. Those keys should lead to something, shouldn't it?"

"It should indeed," Jiraiya agreed with a nod and purse of his lips. "Well, who am I to stop you? From my investigations, it doesn't seem like there are others besides the two Sai must have killed last night. From Cha Sueng's descriptions, they were probably Ginkaku and Kinkaku, two of the strongest assassins I've met. Sai must have really good to be able to take those two out so quickly."

"Can we stop praising the damn bastard?" I grated tightly. "Thanks to him, Haku's in this condition, and he's lucky he isn't alive or I would have repaid him twice as much." I rose to my feet. "Is Cha Sueng still around?"

"Yes, he is, but you haven't given me an opportunity to tell you our plans for _your_ departure," Jiraiya insisted quietly but firmly. "I know you're impatient to get information, but this is important as well."

Reluctantly, I sat down again and stared at him. "When are you leaving with Naruto and Shikamaru?"

"Tomorrow morning as early as we can manage it."

My hands trembled and I had to form tight fists on my lap to control them. I sincerely hoped they hadn't noticed that little moment of weakness.

(less than twenty-four hours, huh?)

"You, on the other hand, will be picked up by Hoshigaki Kisame – a premiere swordsman and invaluable member of Akatsuki. There'll be no mistaking him when he arrives. He's a man of few words, but quite efficient when it comes to carrying out his missions. You'll be leaving on Tuesday morning with him, leaving the girls with Haku. They will be picked up by Wednesday, and with any hope Haku would be alert enough to be moved without causing any more injuries. You will be rendezvousing with your brother in Tokyo -"

"And where will you be with Naruto?"

Jiraiya studied me carefully for what seemed like an eternity before a tiny smile tugged at the corner of his lips. I had no idea why that little motion should get me all flustered, but I had the nasty feeling this old man was onto the reason why I was so desperate to know this information. If Naruto and I were going to be separated, I at least wanted to have a general idea of where he'd be in case of...

(in case of what? What the hell could I do for him anyway?)

"Kyoto...with me and Shikamaru of course," Jiraiya replied. "Not to worry, I promise to keep you updated on his activities if you're so concerned about him -"

"I am not," I lied immediately and knew he wasn't buying it any more than I was. To make matters worse, I could feel Shikamaru's curious gaze trained on me. Damn it!

"Whatever the case, you will all be in good hands. I have no idea what Itachi has in store for you, but I can assure you that you might be thrust into a very difficult situation faster than you bargained for." He lowered his voice, his expression dark. "Word is Orochimaru has begun an ethnic cleansing of sorts. His insanity has him begin destroying entire villages on a whim or at the very notion of a member of your clan being in existence."

My jaw worked as a dull coil of rage filled the pit of my stomach. The fists I had formed became tighter still, the sudden memory of the rampage on my family home all those years ago rushing back in a flood. I could literally smell the choking smoke and hot metallic stench of blood being spilled all over those grounds. The blood and tears of my parents, my people, innocent lives destroyed all because of one - no, _two_ men greedy and evil enough to gain control.

(no more no more no more no more no more no more no...!)

"Your brother and Shisui are both working hard to protect as many as they can, but it is not easy. Your presence there is going to be a blessing to them," Jiraiya continued quietly. "Let's just hope that by the time you arrive, it's not too late. Now then!" He slapped his thighs and gave us a smile. "I believe Cha Sueng should be ready to take you to where you believe Sai resides. I'll stay here and hold the fort, so to speak, until you return."

I opened my mouth to stay something, but the words wouldn't come out. I was swirling with a gamut of emotions that suddenly left me feeling mentally exhausted, but I managed to stand up to give him a firm handshake before leaving with Shikamaru.

Cha Sueng was familiar with the address on the I.D. card (which shouldn't have been a surprise), and in no time, we were in the middle of Buk-gu's traffic on our way to a section of the city we had never seen before. Shikamaru, gratefully, held his peace and didn't bother me during the trip, and it wasn't until Cha Sueng finally pulled to a stop before a non-descript apartment complex, did he finally speak.

"Hm. Nothing too exciting."

"It's the perfect cover up," I replied as I stepped out of the van with a cautious eye around me. The street looked no different from ours, with the usual sight of an old man or woman sitting outside or dozing off, children playing soccer or stick baseball, clothes lines filled with garments that flapped lazily in the wind, the smell of home-made dinners and sewage and the occasional teenage couple flirting stupidly at a corner. A person like Sai could easily blend in without a second look by anyone else.

"Looks like we're good," Shikamaru whispered to me as we made our way into the building. "Don't notice anyone watching us."

I nodded and made my way to the front desk. Though it was not as cluttered and unkempt as Jae Weong's (there were at least fresh flowers here), it still showed signs of the number of years this establishment had been around. The poster board was tacked with more announcements than I could make out, and the landlord – a plump, red-faced man, came jiggling out of his office to greet us.

"Can I help you?" he asked in Hangul, watching us warily as if we were strangers from another planet.

"We are looking for Mr. Sai," I replied in kind; keeping my voice even. We could have made the decision to slip past the desk, but we realized there was no room number on the card, and the keys didn't exactly reveal which room it belonged to either. Instead of spending the rest of the afternoon searching every damn apartment in the building, this was the best way to go. We'd just have to take the risk of the landlord's suspicions.

"Sai?" the man look confused. "Who is this Sai?"

Shit. Had the bastard used a false name then? Was possible, and though I didn't want to do this, I had no other option but to withdraw the I.D. from my jacket to show it to the older man.

"This man. Do you recognize him?"

His brows shot up and he nodded. "Yes, him. Quiet man. Strange. Only comes and goes without saying hello to anyone." He eyed Shikamaru and me again. "And you say you two are his friends?"

"Co-workers," Shikamaru elaborated with a disarming smile that countered my growing impatience. I was afraid my 'watchdog' side was revealing itself, that side of me that had no time to fuck around with such dumb questions and to get straight to the point. Still I had to admire that Shikamaru was able to pick up the lingo so quickly. He must have really been studying it all this time we've been here. Couldn't say the same for Naruto.

"Ah ha...I see," the man said and then shrugged as if no longer interested in whether Sai had friends or not. "Room 436 is where he stays." He jiggled back out the way he came while muttering something beneath his breath, but Shikamaru and I didn't stick around to find out what it was. The elevator ride was less cumbersome than our building, maybe because it didn't have that stomach-churning smell or too much graffiti within.

Soon enough, we were on the fourth floor and standing before the plain gray-painted door where Shikamaru tried the keys to see which one fit. While this happened, I kept watch in case of a possible ambush, every fiber of my being strung taut as I observed every crack, stain, and noise that emanated from the hallway. The other doors (about six rooms in all) were closed, but from the muffled sounds that spilled out here, it at least showed signs of life within them. I stiffened at the dull ping of the elevator doors opening, but relaxed a little when it turned out to be nothing more than an old lady pushing a walker with the help of her young son. I nodded to them in greeting, just as Shikamaru gave a sigh of relief as the door_ finally_ creaked open.

We slipped into the darkened room quietly but quickly, and as I closed the door behind me, Shikamaru flipped on the light switch.

"Christ...are you sure he _lived_ here?"

"It's what the address said," I muttered as I stepped out of my shoes and further into a room that was devoid of any furnishing whatsoever. In fact, if it wasn't for the pair of slippers by the door, or the faint smell of food from the tiny kitchen on our left, you wouldn't believe anyone had been in here in ages. The main living room space had no furniture or décor, and with Shikamaru parting the curtains to the patio – to let in some much-needed sunlight – even that tiny outside space had nothing to show that a human lived here.

I stuck my head into the bathroom – a small space that held nothing but a plastic cup with a toothbrush and a tube of toothpaste on the sink, a cabinet with the usual toiletries, a small white towel hanging on a brass rod, and not much else.

"Jackpot," Shikamaru stated, forcing me to face him. He had pulled open a closet space that was so well disguised as a wall, you might have walked past it without noticing. Some of Sai's clothes hung from coat hangers, there was his rolled-up futon and pillows, and beneath that, two black duffle bags Shikamaru was now dragging out.

Working quickly (he took one, while I handled the other), we began to search through it. In my bag, there was a layer of clothes, which I swept aside impatiently, for beneath I could feel something else.

_Good grief. Had he been planning a fucking war?_

There were two standard-issue .45 Colts with several magazines and cartridges, a set of throwing knives in a rolled up beige pouch, and what looked like a _wakizashi_, but not quite. It was a _jutte_, one of the weapons only a select few could actually wield effectively. I recognized it as one of the bloodied knives I had seen in Sai's bag; a sign he had probably used that on Haku. Unknowingly, my fingers tightened around the hilt of the weapon, my mind taking flight at the fantasy of stabbing Sai's already dead body over and over again. Perhaps in Hell, he'd feel the pain.

"Well, well, well, looks like we've hit the jackpot, Sasuke," came the low comment from Shikamaru that jerked me from my homicidal thoughts. I looked up to notice he had withdrawn several dossiers and envelopes, some of which he was skimming through. "The guy has got enough information and pictures to last a lifetime. He's probably been here since we arrived."

"Let me see that." I reached for one of the dossiers and almost cried out in disbelief at the (recent) picture of Haku on its cover. Within, Sai had done a thorough job describing his actions and daily activities to a tee. In fact, even the fucking blind would have been able to pick out Haku after reading through this. Several photographs had been taken especially in moments when we felt we were 'safe'. I felt disgusted looking at images of myself training or going down the street assuming I was all alone while all that time, the bastard had been watching me.

Talk about being careless. It really was unbecoming of my stature.

As if that wasn't bad enough, Sai even had information about Sergei, Jiraiya, Jae Weong, Cha Sueng, Dr. Woo and his wife, and even Yoona! In fact, it seemed like every single person we encountered throughout our stay had a little information stashed away in Sai's bag. It really was impressive, if I wasn't feeling spooked out at his thoroughness. Just looking at all this, I had the insane urge to dash back to the clinic, tell everyone to get right into the van and straight to the port. We had no idea how much Sai must have told Kimimaro or Orochimaru, but the fact that Gin and Kin had arrived was more than obvious they were already making their move.

"Look we have to get -"

"Shssh!"

I froze as Shikamaru placed a hand upon my wrist with a finger to his lips. His features were strained and dark as he nodded toward the front door. Barely turning, I listened and heard it as well, the light turning of the door knob as someone tried to make his or her way into the apartment. Without saying a word, I motioned for Shikamaru to hide the duffle bags again, but not before picking up the _jutte_ and rising noiselessly to my sock-clad feet. Nearly on tiptoes, I made my way to the door and waited behind it with the _jutte_ raised just high enough to inflict some kind of damage without killing the person. I was glad to see that Shikamaru had taken the initiative to hide in the closet, hence giving the illusion that we had not been in here at all.

I held my breath as the knob twisted this way and that for a second (I didn't recall locking the door or maybe I did after all), but with a forceful push, our newcomer finally got it open and stepped in. As soon as I noticed the shadow of the pistol, I moved swiftly. The _jutte_ came down to slice through his forearm, causing the pistol to drop to the floor, but before he could scream in pain, I stepped behind him to wrap an arm around his neck while slapping a hand over his mouth with the other. I kicked the door shut behind me and dragged him inside, cursing as I noticed the drops of blood trailing after us.

Small matter now. This was more important.

The man – who was a little shorter than me and much stockier – tried to struggle, but I squeezed his neck a little harder, not letting go until the slow collapse of his arms revealed he was close to passing out. I let up the pressure as Shikamaru opened the closet door to reveal himself.

"Someone you know?" I asked wryly.

Shikamaru shook his head and stooped to his hunches before the stranger. "Hey...wake up." He slapped the man's cheeks gently, and then a little harder when it seemed like it hadn't done the trick. Startled gray eyes darted around feverishly for a moment before settling on Shikamaru as if he had seen something from his nightmares. Shikamaru smiled.

"Welcome. We weren't expecting company."

"Who sent you here?" I asked, still holding my position behind him. if he dared make a move, I was going to squeeze his damn neck until it broke.

"I don't know what you're talking about," he sputtered in Hangul, which was funny since he was clearly Japanese. Of course noticing the familiar ring on his finger told me the story. He too was a member of the secret police. God help me. Just how _many_ were out there?

"I think you do," I replied in kind, smirking as he seemed gutted at the realization we were on to him. "You work for Orochimaru, yes? Did he send you to keep an eye on us too?"

He kept his mouth shut, and I squeezed sending him coughing and trying to struggle (albeit weakly) again.

"How many of you are there?" I snapped impatiently.

But like a goddamn mule, he wouldn't say anything. I realized I was fighting a losing battle here. Men like these were trained never to reveal their secrets. No matter how much you tortured them, it was an inbred agreement; spilling secrets was tantamount to committing _seppuku_.

"What's that ring on his finger?" Shikamaru asked.

"Something Sai and everyone else who is a member of the damn secret police wear. In fact, we aren't going to get anything from him either. They are too highly trained to reveal anything to us."

"So...what do we do?"

I stared down into the pale features beneath me. In its place, I could see Haku's bleeding body and his comatose repose, and feeling the dull rage swell within me again, I applied a little more pressure until I felt and heard the undeniable crack of his neck bones finally giving way. The loll of his tongue from the corner of his mouth, and his eyes becoming glassy signified I had done a good job. Let the cops find his body in here and try to put two and two together.

"Stuff all the dossiers and weapons into one bag," I commanded as I began to drag the body into the closet, but not before helping myself to another souvenir. The ring would be added to our growing collection. "We've got to get out of here now."

With a firm nod, Shikamaru did as he was told while I did my best to 'hide' the evidence within the futon. The bloodstains on the wooden floor (no tatami mats here thank goodness), were easily wiped off with a washcloth and some water from the kitchen. By the time we were through, the apartment looked just as it had before. The man's weapon was tossed into the duffle bag as well, and with a final check of the scene, we slipped out and locked the door behind us.

We did not encounter the landlord, thankfully, and I almost had a heart attack when I noticed the van was not waiting for us outside as it was supposed to. However, Cha Seung must have figured out it was best to stay out of sight until we showed up again, because he pulled up mere minutes later with a sheepish smile and an apology. Like us, he too had to be vigilant because we never knew who was watching.

"Take me back to the apartment," I ordered. "I want this kept there and besides, I want to check up Naruto. There might be someone else there and we wouldn't know."

"I'll come with you -"

"No," I insisted firmly. "You go back to the clinic and tell Jiraiya what happened. I'll hold the fort until you all return, all right?"

Shikamaru didn't look too convinced, but he gave a reluctant nod and agreed to my decision.

I felt I was unable to breathe properly until the duffle bag was safe within the closet of our apartment. I slammed it shut and sank to my knees, realizing I had been so fucking tense from the walk out of the van to this point. It felt like every step was being monitored and that growing feeling of paranoia was getting worse by the second. I literally had to rub my hands several times down my thighs to control an uncharacteristic bout of the shakes, and as I stared at my trembling fingers, a rising bubble of hysteria threatened to have me cackling with bitter laughter at how I was behaving.

_Amazing._

Even this far away, Orochimaru's power over me was _still_ palpable.

I was disgusted with myself, and yet I couldn't help it. In a place we had thought would be our solace and refuge, that bastard had found a way to creep into my life again. Haku was the first victim so far, and if he hadn't been vigilant, we might all be in the same situation right now. Jae Weong, though he had been at his usual station at the door and had insisted that he had noticed no one suspicious all evening, I was still not satisfied. I crawled to the glass doors leading to the patio and pushed aside the curtain carefully. It was only sometime past two in the afternoon, and though it wouldn't make sense for any of them to be so blatantly obvious with their spying, it still hadn't stopped them from sending someone to stop Shikamaru and I, had it?

_Oh God...Naruto!_

I staggered to my feet as it suddenly hit me. What if they had gotten him already? What if, all this time, I've been busy worrying about me, one of them hadn't already found a way to get into Naruto's apartment? I reached for my _wakizashi_ and dashed out to the hallway, paused to see and listen for anything out of place, before making my way to Naruto's door. I held my breath and placed my ear against it, but I could hear nothing but the familiar _whirring_ sound of the cooling unit. I studied the ground carefully, searching for an obscure footprint...a piece of clothing..._anything_ that would reveal that there was something out of place. The doorknob looked like it hadn't been touched, and sincerely praying that he had at least locked the door before calling it a night, I placed a hand upon it and twisted.

...only to curse inwardly as it turned easily on the first try. _Goddamnit!_ Didn't this guy have any concept of danger? Wasn't he aware of just how precarious our position was?

(well of course not! He didn't just finish killing a man and hiding his body in a closet, did he? Look at him. He's dead to the world)

And that was putting it mildly.

In the relative gloom of the room, thanks to the curtains being drawn, Naruto was sprawled out on his futon in only his boxers, mouth slightly ajar, with drool accumulating at the corner of his mouth and onto the pillow; one of which was cradled beneath his head, and the other somewhat tucked between his legs. He was snoring lightly, and then gave a particularly loud one before turning onto his other side.

A wave of relief so strong, it literally had my knees trembling, forced me to stumble onto a chair to catch my breath. I closed my eyes and leaned back in silent gratitude that he was okay. I didn't think I'd be able to handle it if anything had happened to him while I was away.

"Hah...acting like a goddamn overprotective Mother Hen," I whispered with a light chuckle of embarrassment. "I should get my ass out of here before he wakes up wondering what I'm doing."

I lifted my lashes and picked up the _wakizashi_ I hadn't been aware of dropping in the first place. I rose to my feet – after I was sure I wasn't going to collapse – and I honestly, did plan to leave and go back to my place to wait for the others, but damn if the urge to watch Naruto again didn't have me gravitating in his direction like an addict.

(less than twenty-four to see you until goodness knows when)

I captured my lower lip between my teeth as I stood over him. To say that this man had managed to change the world I once knew in just over six months would be the understatement of the century. If you had told me that this same man - who had mistaken me for a female 'centuries' ago on that godforsaken bus ride - would be the very same person my heart would be yearning for today, I'd have laughed in your face before killing you for even thinking it in the first place. Intense feelings of hate and apathy to him as a human being had somehow given way to a desire to protect and own him completely. I wanted the sinner to become a lover...not just any lover to anyone, but to me and _only_ me. It would have been a sickening prospect to the Uchiha Sasuke I once was, but oh, how the tide has turned.

"Haven't they, Naruto?" I whispered to my unresponsive companion. "If I hadn't met you...where would I be now?"

Where else? Probably stuck doing paperwork or thinking of the new recruits I'd have to train or fighting off Orochimaru's advances again. What a life, huh?

Not thinking much of what I was doing...or what I planned to do, but knowing that I _had_ to do it all the same, I found myself locking his door and laying my _wakizashi_ on the desk again. I could literally hear my heart beating hard and fast in my ears as I began to unbutton my shirt with fingers that trembled. I knew what I was about to do was inexcusable especially if he woke up to see it, but we had no time to draw out some mushy, melodramatic farewell. This would be the only opportunity we'd get to be alone in every sense of the word, and I wasn't going to miss it.

I stopped when it came to my underwear, an embarrassing wave of shyness coming over me as I began to second guess my decision.

_Do not get cold feet now, goddamnit! It's not as if it's the first time you two have been nude before. Why the shy act now?_

I took a deep breath and tiptoed to the futon, studied the sleeping figure for another long minute before lying, on my back, beside him with my heart in my throat. I could feel his warm breath tickle the hairs on my check and neck, and with a tight swallow, I finally forced myself to look at him.

And _look_ I did; the clarity of it all was simply incredible.

I wanted to memorize every line, swell, scar, and bruise on that face. To trace and etch them into my brain until they literally burned with the very thought of him. I had never noticed how long his lashes were before, neither had I really noticed how deeply ingrained those birth scars were. From a distance they looked like he had just drawn a pencil on his cheeks, but this close...I could see how much they were a part of him. It would take major reconstructive surgery of some sort to eliminate them, but I doubted he'd want to do something that drastic. I loved the scars the way they were. It made him that much more unique and...well...Naruto.

(_his warmth_)

And I didn't just mean body heat either. I was able to see and feel his aura, and even in sleep, it was that wonderful and familiar soothing sensation of 'goodness' and inner strength that had drawn him to me from the moment we met.

(_I never want to be cold again_)

With a fingertip I slowly traced the outline of his parted lips, smiling softly as his breath tickled my flesh. His lashes fluttered as I dared to tease my finger into his mouth, but I withdrew before he could completely awaken. Last thing I wanted to was ruin this shameless moment of observation. Fighting back a groan, I allowed my gaze and hand to travel down his shoulder...

(gently...gently)

...the scars of our battle in the past faded and now replaced with the most recent beatings from Sergei (who I vowed to return the favor should we cross paths again). I slid lower to press my lips against his wounds...on his shoulder blade...right there close to his forearm...another one above his left breast, which I licked and sighed in pleasurable content as his nipples hardened before my hooded gaze. Unable to resist, I captured the pink nub between my fingers, rubbing them gently before pinching them to elicit a breathless gasp of response. His brows were now creased, though it relaxed again as I licked his salty skin, and just when he thought it was all over, I pinched a little harder.

"Uuurgh..."

It was a guttural, animalistic sound that seemed wrenched from his throat as he began to stir a little more. I held my breath and waited for him to open his eyes, for those blue depths to widen in shock before darkening with anger or disbelief or (if I was lucky) passion. But stubbornly, he kept his eyes shut, though I knew that he was probably no longer in the deep throes of sleep. The bastard was probably waiting to see if this was all a dream.

"Might as well make it a reality, hmm?"

With a light smirk, I did as I pleased for I took his 'silence' as permission to continue. I helped to push him onto his back (no protest from him), and continued to worship his battle-tested flesh with a hunger that would never be satisfied. Lower still my teeth and tongue explored; they felt the hard clench of his torso muscles as I licked them, they were tickled by the barely visible golden hairs on his abdomen, and as I swirled my tongue within the tiny hole of his belly button, the soft gasp this elicited definitely told me he was no longer going to bother pretending he was asleep.

Looking up confirmed my theories. Hooded blue-eyes were watching me and instead of the anger and disbelief I had expected, they seemed more intrigued and curious to see just how far I was willing to go. I knew I was at a point of no return for I had never done this to anyone in my life. No one, besides Ino, had even performed such an act and I knew I'd have to recall how it had felt with her to make sure I pleased him without making a fool of myself.

He was literally close to bursting out of his boxers; the rigid outline of his erection nudging the cloth aside and rearing its crude intentions to me. I could feel my face flooding with heat, my head pounding as I tugged gently on the hem of the cloth to release the imprisoned organ.

Good grief! Did I really want to do this?

I couldn't bear to look at him, to reveal my worries and doubts at this point in time, so I settled on studying a piece of flesh I had – so far- only stroked to its completion a few times. I licked my lips as I watched the uncontrollable dew-like drops of his pre-cum coat the swollen head throbbing with life. I swallowed and taking a deep breath, closed my eyes and slowly licked the erect flesh from base to tip in one fluid motion. His tremble and another intake of breath told me I was on the right track. I repeated it again, daring to be a little bolder with my strokes. I savored the taste of his semen on my tongue, kissing the bulbous tip in reverence before trapping it within my mouth to suckle gently.

"Oh fuck yeah," came the low growl of approval that caused my heart to leap with an excitement that was almost embarrassing. I sucked a little harder, and with every low moan he gave, I became even more emboldened and daring. Of course being aware of my now raging erection – which I had to curb by rubbing myself against the futon gently – made this experience more intoxicating. My right hand reached up to caress his perfectly-sized testicles, fondling and tugging them gently with every suck of his penis. He bucked up at the attention I was paying to them, nearly whining as he finally lifted an arm to cover his eyes as if embarrassed.

"Deeper," he seemed to be saying, which had me a little confused. What did he mean by...mmmphff!

_What the hell?_

I nearly gagged as I felt the tip of his penis hit the back of my throat. Naruto – ever impatient – had reached down to push my head lower, forcing me to take more of him than I was ready for. I tried to withdraw, feeling my eyes water as I struggled to breathe, but like the sadist he was, he wouldn't release me until I felt the world swimming before my eyes. Then and only then did he finally let up.

"You...ass...hole!" I gasped as I pulled away, but not before squeezing the base of his penis hard enough to show I didn't find his stunt funny.

"Sorry," he wheezed as I squeezed harder still. "I just wanted to show you how it's really done -"

"I don't need you teaching me anything!" How embarrassing!

"Okay, then let me go down on you -"

"No!"

"Why not? Ouch...let up already, will ya? I said I was sorry!"

I released him with a scowl, feeling that the moment was somehow over. I could still taste him on my tongue and damn if I didn't want to do it all over again. However, with that shit he just..._what the...?_

"Naruto!" I cried out as he suddenly flipped our positions to have me pinned to the futon. "What the hell do you think you're...mmmmphff!"

His lips had me forgetting any anger I might have felt for him minutes earlier. His forceful request to ravish my mouth, as if wanting to taste himself as well, had me blossoming for him willingly. Our hips met in a dance that had us both breaking apart and groaning with the realization that we were this close to coming before we wanted to. He captured my lower lip between his teeth gently and pleaded without saying a word.

He _wanted_ to taste me as well. How the hell could I say no to that look?

I lowered my lashes and looked away; a signal that he could do whatever the hell he wanted as I wouldn't have the power to stop him anyway.

His smile had me flushing a million shades of red, but that was soon lost in a sea of pleasure as his teeth and tongue began to wrack the same havoc I had inflicted on him earlier. I had never been aware of how sensitive my nipples were until he played with them as he pleased; sucking, biting and caressing them in a way that had me thrusting up impatiently for completion.

When he finally got down to my underwear, I was literally dying.

"God, you look good enough to eat," came the unnecessary, but blush-inducing commentary I would have retorted to, if it wasn't for the immediate sensation of his warm mouth enveloping me completely.

(oh God!)

_Now_, I understand exactly what he meant by 'showing me how it's done' for I had never felt anything so goddamn pleasurable and intense in my life. Ino's had been more...gentle I guess, but Naruto...he seemed to know exactly what had to be done to drive me to the point of no return. I found myself clutching the futon desperately, struggling to prolong this moment as I reveled in being 'eaten' with such abandon. Every stroke, suckle, kiss and caress from his lips, tongue and hands drove me wild with lust. I felt feverish, wanting him to never stop despite the heady tingle that was beginning to creep up from the tip of my toes all the way to my head and right down to the center of the action.

()

I was going to explode in a way I never had before, and realizing that Naruto might end up having to swallow my semen in this manner -

"Fuck!"

Was that me crying out that loud? Not that I'd have enough time to think about it as the familiar surge of warmth flooded through my rigid flesh and into the waiting mouth ready to receive every single drop of what I had to offer. I squeezed my eyes shut as my orgasm wracked through me, leaving me a trembling, shuddering mess when it was over. I collapsed back onto the futon to try to catch my breath, finally forcing my lashes open to stare at the incredible being before me. To watch him lick his lips and fingers as if savoring something delicious had me flushing with mingled emotions of delight and embarrassment.

"See?" he crowed as he leaned over me with a smug smile of satisfaction. "Told you that's how it's done. You liked it, didn't you?"

I grumbled and tried to look away, but he captured my cheeks between his hands, forcing me to look at him.

"You liked it...right?" I could sense the doubt in his question, perhaps wanting to know (for the both of us) if what we had just done was really okay. I stared into those twin pools of darkened blue for a long minute before simply responding by reaching up to capture his swollen lips in a kiss that told him everything I could never say. I tasted myself within the warm cavern of his mouth, allowing my tongue to relish the familiar stickiness of my most private of bodily fluids. There was something rather intense about this brand of communion, and yet I knew (or maybe we both knew), there was something more than this...something we both were too 'afraid' to explore first.

"Sasuke..." came the quiet whisper of my name when we finally pulled apart to get some air. "Do...I mean...I want to..."

"...take me?" I blushed darkly and forced myself to finish the sentence. "Uum...be...behind?"

"Ye...yeah..." came the shy stutter. "We don't have to, and I wouldn't mind you...trying it with me, but...I'm still a bit...I can't let anyone touch me there because of..." He lowered his gaze and seemed to struggle within himself for a minute. "Let's just say something that happened to me in the dungeons..."

I immediately sat up with my heart in my throat. An inexplicable rage filled me at the very notion of anyone daring to take advantage of him in that way! "You were raped?" I asked quietly.

He flushed and couldn't bear to look at me. "I don't know for sure," he finally confessed. "All I know is that he stuck something up me and it hurt like a bitch." He gave a weak laugh. "Not exactly the sort of thing we should be talking about now but -"

I couldn't let him finish. The anguish and hurt in his voice had my heart breaking in pieces. I threw myself upon him, my arms clutching his sweat-flushed shoulders and holding him so tight I felt I would never let him go...not for the rest of my life if need be. I had no idea he had gone through something that terrible, had no idea of how much this whole thing between us would have been repulsive to him from the get-go and yet he had dared to give this relationship a try. If I was in his position, I doubted I would have allowed any other human to even consider touching me for a handshake let alone bedding him.

"I'm so sorry," I whispered brokenly against the crook of his neck. "So damn sorry, Naruto."

"What are you apologizing for?" he croaked weakly, and though he embraced me as well, I could feel him trembling. "You weren't responsible."

"But I was...I sent you down there, goddamn it."

"Yeah, but you had no idea that bastard would do such a thing, did you? So don't beat yourself over it." He placed a tender kiss on my temple...down to my cheek...and finally pulled away, but just far enough so he could look at me. "It's all over now," he continued softly as he caressed my cheek with a finger. "That was in the past, and we've got now...well until...you know..."

"I know..."

(goodbye)

We sat in our somewhat embrace – two naked young men pregnant with unspoken things we longed to do and explore with each other, but more than aware of just what our reality consisted of. He reached for my hands to hold them upon his lap, and I was unable to tear my gaze away from the sight of his penis still so damn erect and close to spilling its contents at any second. I wondered if he'd let me finish him off...repay the favor if you will, but I knew it would have to take a whole lot more than just sucking it to completion. In this situation, I _knew_ I'd have to take the initiative.

"Do you have some kind of...lubricant?" I finally asked quietly.

At the widening of his eyes and the dark flush that filled his cheeks - making him look like a kid seeing a naked female for the first time - I smiled and repeated my query. "Well...do you?"

"I...uh...I think so..."

"Where is it?"

"Sasuke..."

"Where?"

"Restroom...cabinet."

"Okay. Wait for me a minute." I leaned close to place a soft kiss on the tip of his nose before rising to my feet before I could change my mind. With my heart thudding loudly, I searched and found what I was looking for. It was an oily body lotion of some sort, but it would have to do. We hadn't exactly prepared for this, had we?

Back in the living room, Naruto was nervously biting his fingers and only stopped and sat up quickly (still looking gob smacked at my intentions) when I sat before him again with the small bottle in hand.

"I guess you'll have to lubricate yourself...and me...before..."

He began to shake his head. "We don't have to do this, Sasuke. It's okay, really. I mean...it's been fine so far with what we've been doing and..."

(can't you ever stop talking?)

I silenced his protests with another kiss, nearly sending us crashing to the floor with the force of it. When I finally pulled away, it was to whisper harshly against his lips. "I _want_ it this way, Naruto. If I never get to see you again..." I forced down the hard lump that came to my throat. "If I never get to see you again, then I want this memory burned within me for the rest of my life. Do you understand?"

His eyes searched mine for so long I felt sure he was going to back away and call this whole thing off. However, when they seemed to soften with a kindness and warmth that made me want to cry, when his trembling fingers reached out to cradle my cheek, when his lips fell over mine again in a kiss that was tender yet passionate, that oh-so-hard ache in my chest revealed _exactly_ what I had so shamefully hidden all this time.

(my feelings for you...)

My feelings for Naruto was so much more than just the physical lust. My feelings for Naruto was so much bigger, intense, and deeper than mere words could describe. It was a swirling abyss of endless emotions; a tempest that raged every time we were together. I wasn't sure if this was what 'love' was supposed to feel like, but whatever it was...it was painful yet so very beautiful in its full revelation.

I hardly felt him move gently into position until two of his coated fingers found an entrance that was off limits to everyone else except probably my mother (if she was still alive). I sucked in a harsh breath and closed my eyes, forcing myself to breathe evenly as he shyly explored and stretched as best he could. Every now and then, he'd ask if I was okay, was I hurt, he wasn't going to fast was he? I wanted to smack him and make him shut up, but I knew he was only being cautious and caring in his own way.

(aaah...yes...)

He probed...and probed...and probed deeper still until I felt it...a gradual swell of toe-curling pleasure that had me clutching his shoulders and trying not to cum all over his stomach. My penis was a hard rock between our heaving torsos. Just what the hell was he doing to me?

"Now," I breathed as my teeth scraped the flesh of his shoulder in readiness to bite. "Please...don't want to come too soon...Naruto...can't fucking take it anymore..."

"Okay...hold on..." he stammered and fidgeted a bit until he all but lifted me onto his lap. Impatient, I wrapped my fingers around his oil-slicked penis and guided it to my prepared opening. It took some awkward attempts to get it right, but I was grateful for my buried (and heated) face against his neck to be concerned with how we both looked now.

(gently...gently...oh God yes...)

"So...fucking...tight..." he remarked breathlessly as I impaled myself slowly on his length until he could go no more. I released the breath I had been holding in and tried to steady my breathing. How else was one to describe this but to liken it to being stuffed full of something that seemed to have a life of its own.

(fused as one...so this is...this is...)

He began to move, and I damn well near lost my mind. Tentatively at first, and after the one hundredth query of whether or not I was all right, I slapped a hand over his mouth, glared into his lust-filled eyes and gave him a straightforward command.

"Shut up and do it."

Guess I should have known he'd take that all too literally, and trust me, I wasn't complaining in the slightest. After the initial bout of pain, Naruto and I finally established a rhythm that we felt most comfortable with, and it didn't take long for me to be swept up in his passion as well..

"So good...so damn good," he praised with every hard thrust, slamming inner walls and muscles with such intensity, I could no longer distinguish where my pleasure began and ecstasy was achieved. We fell back onto the futon, his hands releasing my waist to clasp my thighs as if I was some female he could –

(oh fuck the concept of thinking!)

I yanked him down to me to claim his lips in another torrid kiss as that familiar jolt of heady adrenaline began to surge through me. He must have felt it too for his thrusts became even more frenzied and yet somehow precise. He released my thighs to clutch my buttocks (where I'd have some lovely mementos of just how hard he had held me by tomorrow) and with a loud grunt that was swallowed in our kiss, I felt him stiffen above me, swell within me, before exploding his seed with his orgasm. The warm (nearly hot) sensation of his semen coating my inner walls and finally breaking free to trickle between my ass cheeks and thighs made me feel deliciously _filthy_. Coupled with my final release (a final thrust from him eventually triggered mine), I felt like I was literally bathing in cum. It was disgusting, revolting, grossly degrading...and yet I _loved_ every second of feeling this...what's the word now?

_Slutty?_ Yes. I guess that was appropriate enough. I was nothing more than a wanton whore in this moment, and I couldn't care less what anyone else thought of my actions.

Goodness knew I'd probably require an intense purification rite to cleanse me from this sin, and if Orochimaru was laughing somewhere in the depths of Hell at my current state, then fuck him too.

(at least you were right in one thing...this experience with another male...can be incredible)

I briefly entertained the thought of Naruto and I doing such a thing in his presence, and to see that alabaster face twisted with jealousy, hate, or lust was going to be so very worth all the torture he put me through.

"Jesus fucking Christ," came the breathless gasp, which broke through my thoughts, as Naruto collapsed upon me with his face buried against my neck. He was still shaking (as I was), and as I finally lowered my legs (hadn't even been aware I had wrapped them around his waist), I had to take several gulps of air to get my breathing back in some form of control. I couldn't trust myself to speak...didn't even dare to think of what I could say now. We had finally crossed that threshold of intimate relationships, and I had no idea if telling him about this 'intensity' within my heart would help matters.

Better to keep it to myself and simply bask in the afterglow of our...uh..._lovemaking_? Or whatever you wanted to call it.

"I never want to get up from here," came the low mutter after what seemed like an eternity of us simply lying in each other's arms. The musk of our coupling was heavy in the air, the stickiness now more evident, and I was more than aware that he still hadn't pulled out from within me.

"Neither do I," I confessed as I traced tiny circles on his lower back until I got to his toned buttocks to smack it gently. "But we have to...I bet the others are back now and they'll probably wonder why the hell you aren't opening your door -"

"Or why you aren't in your apartment," he said with a smirk as he lifted his head to look at me.

Blushing I smacked him a little harder and forced him to withdraw (though I had to fight back a wince as a dull sore replaced his absence). Funny. I wanted him back again already, but I was exhausted...in a good way. I wanted to fall asleep in his arms until the nightmare of our reality, outside that door, was over.

He rolled onto his back and gave me a sheepish smile.

"But I do thank my lucky stars you decided to molest me in my sleep, Sasuke."

"...not by choice..."

"Oh? Someone forced you then?"

I hit his forearm gently and gave a heavy sigh. "I did it because of what I told you earlier. You'll be leaving tomorrow morning and I'm...well...who knows when we'll get to see each other again. If this is going to be our last day or night together, I want it to be a meaningful one; a night you'll never forget no matter how many females you decide to bed in the future."

I forced down the bitter rise of jealousy and tried to shrug it off. It was a reality after all. I couldn't expect Naruto to remain celibate for the rest of his life, did I?

"Well, if I decide to bed any other females in the future, I'll just have to make sure they look like you."

"...physically or ...wait a minute." I sat up on my elbows to pin him with a dark stare. "You aren't going to sleep with other _men_, are you?"

Naruto scratched the bridge of his nose and tried to look sheepish. "Well..."

"Naruto!" I growled angrily.

"I'm just kidding," he appeased me quickly, trying to reach up to tug me back to him. "Come on, I wouldn't sleep around with anyone like that...not after what happened just now. Damn." He nuzzled me gently as I flushed in embarrassment. "That was ten times better than any sex I've had with a chick before, and I'm not saying that just to make you happy either."

"...I'm flattered," I grumbled still perturbed all the same. "I wouldn't you know."

"Wouldn't what?"

"Sleep with anyone else," I stated firmly, hoping he'd understand exactly what I was trying to say to him. "Until the day you tell me we will no longer be ..eh...partners...or I have to come pick up your dead body...I will remain celibate."

I held his gaze steady, watching them darken with an expression that was unreadable to me.

"You're really serious about that, aren't you?" he finally asked in an awed whisper. "If I didn't know any better, it would almost seem like you were...that...eh..." He blushed and cleared his throat before mumbling something beneath his breath that I couldn't quite catch.

"What did you say?" I inquired impatiently.

He gave me a shy glance and looking away again, his cheeks all but as bright red as tomatoes, he muttered quickly. "I said, it almost sounds like you're in love with me or something, but that can't be right...I mean...it's not...you wouldn't be that way for someone like me."

_Someone like you? Why not? _

"No," I found myself saying instead. "I just really care about you. I doubt this is...love or whatever you want to call it."

"Right." He nodded firmly. "Can't be. Not that two guys can't love each other, right? I mean Itachi and Shisui are like that, right?"

"Right."

"So...whatever it is we have...it's just really...uum...like an intense friendship."

"That works for me."

"So you'll remain celibate until I come back, right?"

"And you?"

He gave a dramatic sigh and rolled his eyes before grinning at me. "For you, I'll cut off my dick if I have to...gonna be painful though, but anything to show you I'm damn serious too."

I chuckled weakly and lay back beside him. Could be my imagination, but I was sure I could hear voices outside the door, a clear sign that the others were back and our little afternoon soiree had come to an end.

"They're back," I said quietly.

"Yeah...actually they've been back for a while."

"What?"

He snickered. "Right around the time we got started with...you know...someone knocked at the door. Either that or we were the ones doing the knocking -"

"Oh my God!" I covered my face with my hands in utter and complete humiliation. I prayed feverishly that neither of us had cried out when we came or we would have a lot of explaining to do. "Why didn't you say something?"

"Say something? You try speaking when you're having your goddamn mind blown."

"You are such a...hey!"

He never let me finish as he rolled over me again to claim my lips in a kiss that was only broken as he whispered against them in breathless earnest.

"We have only a few hours left, Sasuke. Why don't we make the best of it until they really bang the door down to tear us apart? Like you said, I want this to be a day and night I'll never forget for as long as I live."

_Oh, Uzumaki Naruto. Whatever am I going to do with you?_

I reached up to pull him back to me, knowing damn well that there would be querying eyes, unspoken questions, accusing looks, and glares of disgust from those who would never understand. Our selfishness had to be sated for as long as we could manage it, and until the wee hours of the morning, we'd do our best to deny the world our presence.

* * *

><p>And though I had expected it, though I had told myself I was going to have to accept it eventually, I lifted my lashes with the thin blades of sunlight peeking through the curtains signaling a new day and an emptiness within my heart. The deafening silence in the apartment told the story, the lingering scent of his musk and scent permeating the air with every shallow breath I took. I rolled onto my side to clutch the pillow to my chest, only to finally notice the hastily written note he had left behind.<p>

* * *

><p><em>Sorry. I'm no good with words like you, Sasuke<em>

_But I just wanted to say 'thank you' for being a friend to me_

_In more ways than one._

_You're right. I will never forget yesterday until the day I die._

_I liked the way we talked and got to know about each other a little better_

_And yes the sex was good too. Haha._

_I think Shika (and the old perv) suspect what we were up to, but they are not saying anything_

_Though I told them I forgot something, so I ran back up here to leave you this note and kiss you goodbye._

_Don't laugh. You look so cute when you're asleep anyway._

_We are going to stop by the clinic too. I wanted to say goodbye to Haku even though I'm sure he won't hear me. Or maybe he will in his mind. _

_So please take care of yourself while you are with Itachi. Don't do anything stupid. That job should be reserved for me, all right?_

_I will count the days until I get to see you again. _

_Good luck and kick Snake Dude's ass on my behalf. _

_Naruto_

* * *

><p>"You...stupid...moronic...bastard."<p>

I hitched in a breath and read and reread the note until I could barely see the words anymore. Shameful and weak of me to be this emotional, but I was filled with such _gratitude_ that he had done something this simple and meaningful before leaving. He might not have written the words a (small) part of me had longed to read, but I could 'feel' it all the same. In every scribble and (misspelled) word, I could feel his emotions for in the end that was all that truly mattered.

_Do not forget me when the world threatens to claim you, Naruto, and when our quests for revenge have finally been sated, come find me. I'll be waiting...for as long as it takes...until my final breath. I'll always wait for you._


	35. 35: On Known Shores

**Notes:** Baaaaaaack again from the land of the 'D-E-D'. Sorry folks that the chapters seem to be taking forever compared to the flurry of activity earlier, but real life is kicking my tushie, and finding time to write these days is a luxury in itself. But I promise to keep trying to update as regularly as I can and not to leave this story hanging! Just like you, I want to see how this all ends, so please bear with me.

My sincere thanks to each and every one who took the time to leave a comment on the last chapter. I'm glad the whole 'scene' wasn't too cheese-tastic and felt as real as possible and with 'meaning', which is what I was gunning for. But now, we're back into the nitty-gritty of the storyline where romance might have to take a back seat for a while. So buckle up and prepare for the ride, my dear readers, and again, I thank you for sticking with me. *bows gratefully* Enjoy!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 35<strong>

**On Known Shores**

_Through an unsleeping night  
>Longingly I pass the hours,<br>While the day's dawn lags.  
>And now the bedroom shutters<br>Are keeping light and life from me._

_-**Shun'e Hoshi**_

* * *

><p><em>Naruto: <em>

_Urgh._

The subtle waves of nausea were finally abating. Not being on a moving vessel of this sort in the past few months, my body was having a little difficulty getting adjusted to the ebbs and flows of the sea. The first few hours were spent bent over the toilet hurling out the contents of my stomach, and even with daylight peeking through my closed windows, it didn't do much to help my general gloomy disposition.

In summary, I felt like shit.

With a weak moan, I covered my head with the scratchy blanket, the narrow cot's edges jabbing into my sides as I struggled to make myself comfortable. You'd think with all the money Jiraiya had in his possession, he'd be able to get us a better mode of transportation, but no dice. In an attempt to smuggle us out as discreetly as possible, he had chosen one of the most inauspicious fishing boats at the port. It was a good plan, after all who would ever assume that he was traveling with two wanted fugitives in such an abominable contraption? It didn't help that Shika and I were literally stuffed into empty wooden crates and dragged onto the boat by the fishermen. We were informed that there were some 'special' inspectors on duty eager to arrest us at first sight. I literally couldn't breathe (even when we were finally released from our mini-prisons) until the port was nothing more than a miniscule dot in the horizon.

_Farewell, my dear Korean neighbors. Your hospitality was top-notch._

My lips twitched a little at the sentimental albeit sarcastic thought even as memories of my last night in that country slipped into my consciousness like they had been doing for a while now. From stopping by the clinic to say my goodbyes to Dr. Woo, his wife, and Haku (who was still in deep sleep or coma and probably hadn't heard half of what I rambled to him), to every single second spent with Sasuke – it felt like having to rewind a videotape several times over just to make sure I didn't miss anything.

(was it all a dream?)

I turned onto my back; hands beneath my head to stare blindly at the aged and dank wooden ceiling above me.

(did that all really happen?)

I was sure by now Sasuke must have seen my stupid note, something I had written hastily with not enough time to go over it or make any changes. I hoped I didn't come across as being a total moron, but it was hard really trying to convey just how much last night had meant to me considering everything that's happened between us to that point.

(maybe it really was a dream and if I pinch myself everything will go back to 'normal' again)

I guess I was still in a slight daze about the whole experience to be honest. To think that Sasuke – of all people – would willingly offer himself to me in _that_ way...man, talk about taking a step into dangerous territory. If I closed my eyes, I could still _feel_ and relive every damn moment, can still smell him, taste him, hear those sounds of passion I never thought (in my wildest dreams) that a guy would be capable of making. It's slightly embarrassing to admit that they only did more to turn me on back then (and now actually), but damn! Get past the first awkward stage of not knowing exactly how things work when it comes to making out with a guy...get the hang of it...and talk about getting your fucking mind blown. If the first go at it had been one of experimentation and 'feeling out', the second time around was much better in my opinion. We weren't as frenzied, and we took our time savoring and prolonging our orgasms as best we could (which was pretty damn hard actually). Still it was amazing and something I'd definitely want to try again if we ever get that opportunity.

(trying not to get my ass killed will be a start)

And that promise he made? The one about keeping himself 'celibate' until I returned...what _exactly_ did that mean? It was the sort of thing a girl would say to the guy she really loved or something, and though I had pestered (teased) him about it, I had a feeling Sasuke had been damn serious about it.

_He must be..._

I shook my head rapidly to get rid of the thought, telling myself that Sasuke was just caught up in the moment since it was technically both our first times doing such a thing (and in his case, the second time he's been involved in such an intimate relationship), so his priorities were all mixed up.

(and yours aren't, Uzumaki Naruto?)

Hn. Besides who was to say what would happen when he got to Tokyo and spent more time with Itachi and his buddies? Temptation was everywhere, and I had no delusions that Sasuke wouldn't find someone else (male or female) to keep him company when he got the urges again.

(and what about you?)

I bit my lower lip at the taunting question from my inner voice. What about me indeed? What if I got the 'urge' to satiate my primal desires? Could I really promise to control myself when the time came? Who knew when next I'd get to see Sasuke again? What if we **never** see each other again? What then? Could I keep deluding myself in believing I'll go my grave never having sex with another human being again?

I groaned and covered my eyes with an arm as I felt the dull throb of a headache approaching.

(ah fuck)

This was getting back into the stresses of relationships and wondering what should and what shouldn't happen. Ugly flashbacks of time spent agonizing over Sakura's behavior, in the latter stages of our relationship, had my heart sinking in misery. The last thing I needed was to be focused on Sasuke and what he was probably up to at this moment or his future liaisons with new sex partners. I was about to embark on a journey that would provide little to no room for such romantic idealisms. If I was to pull off this next stage of my life, I'd have to push all thoughts of Sasuke to the darkest recesses of my mind.

Besides, it wouldn't do to give Jiraiya and Shika the impression that I was feeling lonesome and melancholy over leaving my 'lover' behind. As I mentioned in the letter to Sasuke, neither man had confronted me about our 'disappearance' yesterday, but I knew that they _knew_ Sasuke and I were up to something, and if either man disapproved, they had given no indication of it. I did notice Shika didn't speak to me much, but I attributed that to him being miserable about leaving Temari behind.

(none of their damn business anyway what I choose to do in my private time, right?)

Still, I did manage to reveal to Jiraiya what Sasuke had told me about the confrontation with one of Orochimaru's spies at Sai's apartment. Fortunately, Jiraiya was up to date with that information considering Shika had revealed the incident to him as well. It was agreed that they'd leave the info for Sasuke to deal with, besides we had little time left to mull over what the documents entailed. The ball was now in the Uchihas' court. Let them decide what they'd do with Sai and his cohorts. My only prayer was that they managed to get out of the country safely. If there had been one other spy lurking about...what stopped others from showing up when they least expected it?

Fifteen restless minutes later, I gave up the task of trying to get some sleep and crawled out of the cot (nearly took off my head with the low ceiling) and staggered out to a very wet deck and bright sunshine. Odd. Despite the sun, it was still rather chilly, which forced me to wrap the blanket tightly around my body as I shuffled toward the port side. Several fishermen (five of them) sat in a huddle, playing cards and yakking about something I couldn't quite make out. All the same, it was good to hear them speak Japanese as they acknowledged my presence with quick nods before focusing on their game again. There was no sign of Jiraiya, so I assumed he was still locked away in his cabin. However, I did spy my buddy sitting near the stern with eyes closed as if asleep though from the lit cigarette dangling from the corner of his lips, it was clear he was awake. He looked like he hadn't slept much last night either. There were dark rings beneath his eyes, early morning stubble that needed to be shaved, and he hadn't even bothered putting his hair in its usual ponytail.

"'Sup," I greeted as I plonked myself beside him on upturned crate (having to push aside a few old ones that still reeked of sea life and remnants of shriveled seaweed).

Lashes lifted lazily to reveal bloodshot eyes before he nodded lightly. "'Sup," came the muttered reply. He lowered his lashes again and we fell into companionable silence. I stared at the expanse of ocean before us, feeling something heavy settle in my stomach as I realized that in about a day, we'd be seeing the first signs of life...land..._Japan_ to be exact. I missed home and though I wasn't exactly going back for a life of peace and quiet, it was still my homeland; where I was born and where I'd hopefully die someday.

Just as long as my goals were achieved first that is.

I longed to tell Shika all this, to blurt out how and what this new phase of my life meant, but it seemed inadequate for some reason, and I was sure he was in no mood to listen to my drivel anyway. Eventually - and maybe it was the lull of the sea or the excitement of the past few hours finally catching up to me - I found my lashes growing heavier with every passing second. Just as my head was about to fall upon Shika's shoulder in slumber, the sharp and delicious smell of something edible had me sitting up quickly. It was a reminder I had not eaten anything solid for what seemed like an eternity.

I sniffed the air like a dog and craned my neck around to see where the smell was coming from.

"Finally," came the wry commentary beside me as Shika rose to his feet and stretched his arms over his head. "Let's go get something to eat, man."

He didn't need to tell me that twice. Together we made our way down to the dinette, a tiny cramped space made worse by the presence of Jiraiya whose large frame seemed to dwarf everything in there. Both he and the captain of the boat were already helping themselves to some tasty-looking grilled fish while engaged in lively conversation interrupted every now and then by Jiraiya's loud guffaw. Several bottles of beer sat opened on the table, and when both men finally noticed our presence, they ushered us in to sit with them. Where? On their freakin' laps? There was hardly any room! Luckily, the captain was good enough to excuse himself but not before ordering the poor cook to whip up something for us quickly. Looked like the guy was on his last legs and not exactly enjoying his job, but dutifully he did as he was told and all but slammed our bowls of rice and _miso_ soup (and the grilled fish) before us once ready.

"_Itadaikimasu!_" I bellowed happily, digging in before either of my companions could stop me.

Jiraiya chuckled and belched before sitting back with a sigh of content. Soon the familiar stench of his tobacco filled the air as he lit his pipe. I watched the rings of smoke absently, while my tongue, teeth and stomach savored the meal that was rapidly disappearing before my eyes. I wondered if the cook would give me seconds, but from the way the guy was already washing the dishes and glaring at us, I doubted he would be willing to do so. I eyed Shika's plate. He was eating pretty slowly and didn't look like he had much of an appetite. I debated begging for his meal when Jiraiya cleared his throat to begin speaking.

"The good news, boys, we should be back home sometime tomorrow night." He smiled at us. "Home sweet home and all that good stuff. The bad news?"

_Now what?_

"...you're gonna have to be stuck in the crates again. The port is swarming with watchdogs as of my last communication with one of my reliable sources." He flicked out some ash from his pipe, the smile gone and his eyes now distant and thoughtful. "Should be no problem if all goes as planned. I will depart before you, under the guise of having some business affairs conducted in Busan. If queried I'll have documentation to prove my case. The crates – with you two included – will be loaded onto trucks going directly to a warehouse a few miles from where I live. You are to wait there, bringing no attention to yourselves, until my assistant arrives to pick you."

"Your assistant?" Shika asked as he picked absently at the fish with his chopsticks.

Jiraiya grunted. "He's more of a private secretary and has been with me since he could walk. Trustworthy in other words." He gave me a ghost of a smile. "In fact, it's safe to say he and your father were like brothers while Minato was with me...well more like a little brother. Hatake Kakashi has proven to be loyal to me over the years, and I have no doubt you'll take to him when we arrive."

I pouted and said nothing. I already hated this Kakashi, and I knew it was only because of the tidbit about him being a 'little brother' to my father. This guy had spent more time with my Dad than I ever had the opportunity to. He'd probably have great stories to tell of him, while I'd have to suffer through the memories of what should and couldn't be. It wasn't as if it was this Kakashi's fault that things turned out the way it did, but I still couldn't help feeling this way. _Pure envy._ I prayed he'd be a complete asshole so I could really find more of a reason to loathe him.

"Secondly, you boys are going to have to be made-over from head to toe."

I raised my brows. "What?"

"You look like a bunch of scallywags," Jiraiya remarked with a quick appraisal of us. "How exactly do you plan on making an impact looking like you've just walked off the street?"

"We haven't exactly had the chance to do any shopping," I began in protest, but Jiraiya held up his hand to silence me.

"Never you mind that, you uncouth little rascal." He grinned and seemed pleased with himself for some reason. "By the time I'm through with you, you'll be a whole new man, Uzumaki Naruto. You might be in the running to become the best assassin this side of the Eastern hemisphere, but we are also going to whip you into shape to become the best _gentleman_ this side of Japan as well. Got it?"

Shikamaru, for the first time all morning, finally cracked a smile and hid his amusement behind the cup he raised to his lips. I scowled and pretended to act upset, though my heart was beginning to beat like a snare drum. I had no idea what Jiraiya planned to do with me (after all, I was yet to see any manual that said one had to be 'polite' before whacking your enemy) but whatever it was, I just hoped the end product would help me in the long run.

God knew I'd had more than enough 'lessons' to last me a lifetime.

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke:<em>

"Hmm...so you are baby brother Sasuke, eh? You are not appealing in any way...unlike your older brother."

What the hell is this idiot talking about?

He parted his lips to reveal shark-like teeth, his pale visage almost bluish against the light filtering through the windows. Hoshigaki Kisame easily stood almost seven feet tall (I exaggerate of course, but you get the idea), and the tailored black suit he adorned definitely made him look like a member of the _yakuza_. I would have preferred he wore something else, because believe it or not, this made him stand out like a sore thumb. If his greasy spiked hair, scarred cheeks, beady eyes and sly grin weren't enough to have people terrified on the spot; his attire would give them even more of a wrong impression. Itachi had given me an idea of what to expect, but this was ridiculous.

"Are you ready?" he asked, peering over my shoulder to eye the bags I had packed in preparation for the trip ahead. "Light traveler, aren't you?"

"I'm not exactly going on a vacation, am I?" I retorted irritably. "You can take these." I shoved two of the travel bags to him, leaving the one that contained Sai's documents. That, I'd carry myself. "And give me five minutes," I instructed while all but shoving him out the door. "I'll meet you downstairs."

If he was annoyed at my brusqueness, he gave no indication, simply grinning again and giving me a mock bow. "As your Highness wishes. Five minutes and we leave. The boat isn't going to wait for us forever, you know."

I slammed the door before his flashing canines and forced myself to breathe evenly. I eyed the apartment that I had spent most of the day cleaning. I had already packed away Haku's things and taken them to Karin's room, so all that was left were the simple furnishings and décor he had added to a space that once looked empty and devoid of life. The flowers he had so lovingly tended now looked pathetic and shriveled, but I didn't have the heart to discard them. In a way, seeing them in this state seemed to encapsulate the grand finale of our stay here in Buk-gu. We had started out in 'promising' fashion, perhaps naively assuming that everything would be all sweet and rosy by our return to Japan, but now...our departure seemed clouded with sadness and pain.

(we all eventually wither and die)

Earlier in the day, after finally managing to extricate myself from Naruto's futon -

(damn the soreness!)

...and forcing myself to stop reading that godforsaken note for the one-millionth time, I paid Haku a visit without holding much hope that he'd be awake. However on arrival at the clinic, I was all but pounced upon by Dr. Woo's wife, who was beside herself with excitement.

"He's awake," she blabbed happily. "Still weak and not speaking much, but at least he's sitting up and did manage to take some soup this morning. Wonderful, isn't it?"

That was putting it mildly. I didn't want to enter the room grinning like an idiot, and it did take all of my self-control not to pull him into a tight embrace as I noticed the pallid features and frail figure of my dearest servant (friend) propped against piles of pillows behind him. To see those large brown eyes light up at the sight of me had my heart thumping and brought a lump to my throat. I guess I needn't have bothered about being too emotional because he immediately burst into enough tears for the both of us. Awkwardly, I sat on the edge of the bed and accepted his outstretched arms; hugging him as carefully as I could for fear I'd break him. He felt so damn light and wouldn't stop trembling.

"It's okay," I whispered as he continued to sob against my shirt. Good thing the girls were still back at the apartment and Dr. Woo's wife was smart enough to realize we needed our space. This was slightly embarrassing.

"It's all over now, Haku," I reassured him. I stroked his hair gently, never realizing just how soft the long tresses were and considering he hadn't had a haircut in a while; it was practically waist-length now. "You're safe...that's all that matters, and you know what else?"

I pulled back, but just enough to cup his cheeks and to stare hard into those eyes that seemed to take up his entire face. "I'm really proud of you," I admitted with all the sincerity I could muster. "What you did was incredibly stupid and yet the bravest thing you could have possibly done." I placed a hard kiss on his forehead, receiving another tremble from his body at this. "I'm so, so proud of you."

He couldn't speak, and I didn't expect him to anyway. His low choked sob was enough to tell me that he had heard my words and understood just what I was trying to convey. Making myself a little more comfortable on the narrow bed, I debated on whether or not to tell him of my adventure with Shika at Sai's apartment, and yes, though I had plenty of questions about exactly what took place in that alley the other night, I knew this was also not the time to pester him with my curiosity. He'd tell me everything when he was fit to do so.

"Sas...Sasuke-sama," came the barely audible words as Haku finally pushed himself away a little to sit up some more. "I...I -"

"Shssh, you don't have to tell me anything now," I interrupted with a shake of my head. Just speaking those few words was already exhausting for him. "There'll be plenty of time for you to tell the whole story when we're back home."

He opened his mouth as if to protest, but seemed to think twice about it. He settled for giving a miserable nod and lowering his head, trembling hands clutching the sheet tightly until his knuckles turned white. I wondered if he was reliving everything as it happened, or if his comatose state had given him a minor dose of amnesia. Either way, the last thing I wanted was for him to strain himself for my sake.

"Jiraiya arrived yesterday," I finally announced quietly, my gaze focused on the play of light and shadows against the wall as a gentle wind lifted the gossamer curtains. I could sense Haku looking at me now, his body language changing as my statement slowly sank in. He knew, as well as I did, what Jiraiya's arrival meant; that right about now, he, Naruto and Shikamaru were (hopefully) miles at sea on their way back to a country that would not really welcome them with open arms.

"He said he was going to stop by to see you before leaving...Naruto that is," I added with a small smile. "I guess you didn't see him then?"

"So...it wasn't a dream?" he whispered more to himself than to me.

"What's that?"

Haku lifted his gaze to mine, a searching expression on his visage. "I heard his voice...faintly. I thought it was probably just a dream, but I guess not. He was here after all...he came..."

He looked around as if seeing the room for the first time, and I hated to admit that the expression on his face now (softened...as if in awe) had my heart doing a strange hard twist that I recognized as nothing more than petty jealousy. It seemed odd I'd have to feel this way considering last night and all that Naruto and I had shared. Unfortunately, this was only a reminder that despite everything...Haku _still_ did have those feelings for Naruto, and I'd be naïve to assume he'd get over the blond that quickly. It would definitely be best if I did not mention last night's shenanigans to him, though I feared the girls would still end up blabbing anyway about how much time Naruto and I spent alone. Haku would, no doubt, put two and two together to come to his conclusions.

At least I was glad I wouldn't be around when that happened. I couldn't bear to see his expression when it was eventually revealed.

"When are we leaving, Sasuke-sama?" came the soft query that roused me from my thoughts.

"I leave tonight with one of Itachi's friends," I explained. "His name is Kisame or something of the sort. You and the girls get to leave tomorrow night. We decided its best we leave separately in case of any problems that might be encountered. We will rendezvous in Tokyo where Itachi and the other members of Akatsuki are staying."

"...and Naruto-kun?"

I bit my lower lip and shook my head. "He isn't going to be with us, obviously. He's with Jiraiya and Shikamaru...heading to Kyoto, I believe."

"Ah..."

A pensive silence descended between us, where I was no doubt sure we were both thinking of the very same person, and just how much this person would 'change' when and if we ever met each other again.

"I wouldn't worry too much about Naruto-kun," came the sudden statement that had me looking up sharply and at the now smiling visage before me. Had he sensed my concern? Or was it just his natural instinct to always think positively kicking in? His tentative smile became more genuine as he reached out to clasp my hand. He gave it a gentle squeeze as if to reassure _me_.

"Naruto-kun will come back to us someday," he continued with a firm nod. "No matter how long it takes. I'm sure he'll find us again when he wants to."

"Still wearing those rose-colored glasses I see."

He had the grace to blush, but I tapped his forehead gently to let him know I was only teasing.

"It's all right to think and hope that," I said aloud. "However, you realize that we are returning back to a country that considers us dead or the enemy. We are literally about to step into a war zone, Haku, so do me a big favor and try to get better fast, all right? I can't do this alone without you by my side, remember?"

I couldn't look into the eyes that literally shimmered with the promise of more tears at my blunt and honest declaration; hence I rose to my feet and pretended to stretch out my arms. A quick side-glance showed that he was trying to gather himself, perhaps realizing that his displays of emotion were getting a little out of hand. When he was satisfied he wasn't going to start bawling like a baby, he took a deep breath and nodded firmly in resolution.

"I promise, Sasuke-sama," he stated. "I'll be by your side whenever and wherever you need me."

"Good." I smiled and held out my hand, which he accepted in a handshake that was determined. "See you in Tokyo in a few days, eh?"

"Yes, Sasuke-sama! Have a safe trip and please send my regards to Itachi and Shisui-sama."

_Consider that done,_ I thought to myself as I zipped up the last bag and rose to my feet. I headed to the bathroom to put the finishing touches to my appearance, after all 'Uchiha Sasuke' couldn't be seen walking around the port when there were likely to be watchdogs (or more spies) on duty. The dark brown (almost reddish) contact lenses I had been given when we arrived would have to be put to use now, and though it stung a little, I had to admit they made me look a little more menacing to the casual observer. Unfortunately, the effect was countered with the non-prescription reading glasses I wore which gave the illusion of being a complete nerd.

(ah, you should see the way I look now, Naruto. You'd probably laugh your ass off)

With some effort – try getting my damn hair to fall flat when not wet – I finally managed to fit the shaggy brown wig over my head. It fell to my shoulders and made me look as if I hadn't combed (or taken a shower) in weeks. I slipped a black hoodie over the mess, zipped it up and let myself out of the apartment, and though I would have preferred to slip away unnoticed, I still felt obligated to at least say goodbye to the women.

I braced myself for a dramatic scene of wailing and excessive displays of affection, but was surprised (and grateful) that both of them seemed preoccupied (and from the chaos in the room behind them, it appeared they were in the thick of getting their packing done as well). They wished me a safe trip and hoped to see me in Tokyo in a few days, although from the strained and reddened eyes, Temari was clearly miserable about not being able to see her man when she did get home. The agony of being separated again and having to wait on pins and needles daily to hear some kind of news about him was understandable. However, I couldn't be the one to give her any false hope about his safe return. Just as I had told Haku, the future was going to be unpredictable.

"Took you long enough," came the drawl from my travel partner as I made my way outside the building and into the waiting van being driven by Cha Heung. I ignored the sarcastic greeting, hardly glancing his way as his heavy frame settled beside me. With a brusque command to Cha Heung to take us to the port, Kisame settled back with a grunt. I could feel him eyeing me.

"You know what to do when we get there, correct?" he finally asked. "Itachi gave you the rundown?"

"Yes."

He grunted again and realizing I was in no mood to engage in conversation with him, he proceeded to whip out a dangerous looking switch blade from his breast pocket...only to begin scraping out the filth beneath his fingernails in a manner that made me want to cringe in disgust. Of all the people Itachi had to send to me.

The journey was relatively uneventful, however as the van slowly approached the bustling port, I could feel my heart begin to thud a little harder and faster. It was almost midnight and yet there were several armed policemen patrolling the area. They seemed to be stopping the cars at a toll gate of sorts and with high-powered flashlights, peering into each vehicle and asking questions or demanding documentation.

(shit!)

Kisame sat up and tucked the blade away. Whistling softly beneath his breath, he dug into his jacket and this time, withdrew a white envelope that looked a little bulky along with an I.D. card and some other pieces of documentation. With my heart now racing a mile a minute, I tried to blend into the seat as our vehicle finally came to a stop before two officers. The glare of the flashlights made my eyes water as they were shone all over our faces. They began to speak in rapid Hangul; their voices curt and impatient. Cha Heung dutifully showed his license, and Kisame - still acting cool and unconcerned - extended the items in his hand to the officer barking at him.

There was a cursory glance given to the I.D. and documentation, and like magic, the white envelope disappeared into the officer's uniform almost giving the illusion it hadn't been there in the first place. With another barked order _"I sang mu!"_ the officer gave us a curt nod, motioned to his partner that we were good, and waved for us to pass through the gates.

_Fucking thieves!_

And yet I knew this was only standard protocol for some members of the police. Hell, even the watchdogs back home weren't spared from such displays of corruption. I have had my fair share of dealing with such officers in the past, and though kicking them out of the force had been a pleasure, a part of me had still felt deep disappointment at how far they'd go just to make a little extra money. It was aggravating considering that they were usually one of the higher paid government workers. Why be so fucking greedy?

"Don't get too comfortable," Kisame warned as we made our way slowly through the organized chaos around us. "There are some officers here who can't be bought easily. Just keep your head down, and remember -"

"I am deaf and mute and just your...servant," I managed to grate out with some effort. Kisame's lecherous grin made me want to scratch it right off his face.

Fortunately, I was spared the agony of having to act out my new role thanks to a sudden commotion along a ramp. It seemed like two delivery trucks had a head-on collision spilling their contents (seemingly hundreds of crates of canned goods) all over the lot. With everyone running around trying to put things back in order, Kisame and I boarded the waiting fishing boat easily. More money was shelled out, this time to the captain who didn't look like he gave a shit who was on his boat as long as he was paid for it. I was ordered to make my way below deck, where I was all but shut in a cabin (prison) until the journey was over.

"Make yourself as comfortable as possible, Sasuke-_chan_," Kisame drawled through the peephole. "This is going to be a long trip."

"Fuck off," I grunted beneath my breath.

Still, I was more than fine with this arrangement for it would give me plenty of time to think and map out my future course of action. Naruto had his battles to fight, and so did I. Neither of us knew who the bigger 'monster' was, for both men seemed to have their scales piled with sins so heavy, they threatened to break the fragile chains supporting them. Unfortunately, little would I know just how far and dangerous Orochimaru's madness had become.

(lest we succumb to the darkness within)

There was simply no going back now.

* * *

><p><em>Naruto:<em>

_Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Goddamn it...move!_

I grunted and pushed even harder, every bone in my body aching from the numerous bumps and bruises I've suffered in the past god-knows-how-many hours since we got off the freakin' boat. As Jiraiya had planned, once we arrived in good ol' Maizuru, we were stuffed into the damn things again, dragged off the vessel, tossed into a truck and then went through a hellish journey where we were stacked against crates of rotten fish (at least I think it was rotten fish) and with a driver that didn't seem to consider that there were human beings as part of his cargo. He seemed determined to drive like a madman, running through every pot hole he could find and jarring my already rattled bones. What's worse is that we were unceremoniously dumped in this warehouse and no one bothered trying to get us out! For the past ten minutes, I've been trying to escape from my claustrophobic prison, and so far no luck. It's as if I'm stuck beneath another crate, which would make things even worse, and short of screaming for help and attracting unwanted attention, I was trapped in this man-made Hell.

URGH! MOVE GODDAMNIT!

With all the strength I had left, I heaved myself up and shoved with my shoulders, having to bite back a cry of pain as I struck it at an awkward angle.

(FUUUUCK! That hurts!)

"Naruto?" came the sudden harsh whisper that had me blinking for a second in confusion. Either I was beginning to hallucinate or someone had actually -

"Naruto? Where are you?"

SHIKA!

"Here! I'm right here, Shika!" I whispered back as loudly as I could. "I think I'm beneath another crate, but I can't be sure. I can't see a fucking thing, man! Get me out of here!"

"Hold on...I think I hear you from...ah. Here we go." There was a lot of rustling and then louder grunts which proved my theory right. There had been crates stacked above me all this time. Fuck those lousy warehouse workers! Thank God for Shikamaru being around or I might have become forgotten goods.

With the lift of the crate above me, a merciful gust of air filtered through some of the holes in my dungeon. There were another series of light grunts as Shikamaru began to pry the top of the crate open, and with a final curse and yank, he was able to remove it. I just about draped my perspiration-drenched body over the side of the crate, sucking in gulps of precious air before flashing him a weary smile of gratitude.

"Tha...thanks, man. You saved my life."

He grinned and tossed the crowbar he had used to the side. "No problem. Come on; let's get the fuck out of here."

He reached out to pull me to my feet, where I was allowed to finally take a good look at our new surroundings. It was a massive building and typical of many of the warehouses one is likely to find in such port cities. However, unlike most of the abandoned ones, dulled yellow light bulbs illuminated this particular warehouse that was filled with what seemed like thousands of crates of goodness knew what. It couldn't all be fish because the smell was more metallic and oily. Weapons maybe? This could be a _yakuza_ hideout for all we knew.

"Didn't Jiraiya say we had to wait here for his assistant to come pick us up?" I asked as we trotted toward the large doors which appeared to be locked. Although peering through the little crack between door and wall, I could tell from the lights that it was nighttime. How late or early, we had no idea.

"Yeah..." Shikamaru agreed as he too peeked out. "But what if he's waiting for us outside? How do we -?"

"Whoa!"

We had to jump aside as a near-deafening clang of some machinery we couldn't see, began to slide the doors open in a slow grind. Being cautious, we ran back toward the crates to hide amongst them, hoping the newcomer(s) wouldn't be an enemy we weren't prepared for. A blinding flood of headlights filled the warehouse, a signal that it was a vehicle of some sort approaching. More deliveries? Would make sense if that was the case.

However, as the driver dimmed the lights (gratefully), we could see it was definitely _not_ a delivery truck. The sleek, black sports car – something I would have given my left nut for if I was loaded – swerved effortlessly into position and for what seemed like an eternity remained idle as if its driver was unsure of whether to get out or not.

"Holy shit," Shika breathed in awe.

"Holy shit indeed," I agreed, silently praying that whoever this person was, he was going to be the one to pick us up.

Finally, the driver's door opened to reveal a shiny pair of black leather shoes, gray well-tailored pants, leading up to a matching vest and jacket. Beneath this ensemble was what appeared to be a black turtleneck, but whereas most people tended to have theirs stop at their neck, this newcomer favored having the damn thing pulled all the way over his mouth.

(what the fuck?)

As if that wasn't bad enough, there was a black patch over his left eye, giving his one good one a dark and impenetrable expression that was hard to decipher. His spiked hair was white, though he looked like he was still in his late twenties or early thirties at least. With a quick impatient glance at his watch, he stepped away from the car to eye the warehouse as if unable to believe he had been sent to this dump in the first place.

"Maybe he's the one?" Shikamaru whispered.

"We can't be too sure," I responded. This guy definitely looked like he was a member of the _yakuza_, but then again, considering Jiraiya's background...why should that be a surprise? And though he was skinny and didn't look that threatening, there was still a latent power/aura around the guy that could not be denied. He wasn't the kind of person you wanted to piss off that's for sure.

"Let's wait to see -"

"I believe you two men were expecting me?" came the clear and clipped query that had Shika and me looking at each other in surprise. "I am Hatake Kakashi. I'm sure Jiraiya-sama must have told you to expect me. Please come out of your hiding place. We have little to no time left to waste."

_So you are Kakashi, eh?_

I rose to my feet and stepped away from the crates, barely hearing Shikamaru follow my lead. We stopped a few feet away from him, the three of us appraising each other for a long minute as if to make sure we were really the party the other was expected to meet. Not surprisingly, he stared at me the longest, no doubt trying to compare me to my father. I waited for him to smile and say something along the lines of "how you look like Minato" (and maybe I would have punched him in the face), but he did nothing more but give a curt nod and motion toward the car.

"Please get in and make yourselves comfortable. We have quite a journey ahead of us."

Like he needed to tell us that twice. While Shika was busy bowing in greeting, I was already diving into the back seat where the rich smell of new leather and the overall luxury of the automobile made me sigh in pleasure. Damn. I almost felt bad having to ruin such fine upholstery with my stinking body and filthy clothes, but what the hell? This was the life!

"Nice, eh?" Shika said with a smirk as he sat beside me.

"And just think, in a couple of weeks, we could be driving the same thing," I gloated and grinned as I sank back and placed my hands behind my head. "I could get used to this _yakuza_ lifestyle."

As Kakashi settled back into his seat, I caught his gaze through the rearview mirror. I couldn't be sure, but I think he was smirking at my comment, and perhaps I would have queried him about what the fuck was so funny, but he was now pulling out of the warehouse which distracted me. Like a man deprived, and though it was dark and I couldn't see much anyway, I leaned toward the window to peer at the passing scenery.

_Home sweet home._

I had never been to Maizuru before, but how good it felt to see familiar signs in a language I could understand, and to see faces or people – though strangers – who were still likely to speak to you as if you were a long lost family member. I honestly can't remember dozing off, but the next thing I knew, I was being shaken awake by someone calling my name rather obnoxiously in my ear.

"Lemme alone," I grumbled and tried to snuggle against the car door, but some idiot suddenly yanked it open and I almost found myself kissing asphalt! Who the fuck -!

"Welcome home, Naruto," came the amused greeting as I glared up at Kakashi, while Shika was busy chuckling behind me. "We have much better sleeping accommodations, I can assure you."

Grumbling beneath my breath, while giving Shika the middle finger for being so chummy with 'the enemy', I staggered after our host, noticing idly that it was still somewhat dark.

"What time is it?" I asked as I stifled a yawn.

"Almost dawn," Shika replied. "The ride must have taken at least two hours. I dozed off too."

"Ah..."

Whatever else I might have said died off as I realized just where Kakashi was leading us into. We were in a well-tended courtyard filled with enough exotic foliage to rival a national botanical garden. Amidst the raked white gravel gardens and Zen stones/rocks, were ponds of different shapes and sizes, many hosting _koi_ in delightful electric hues of orange, red and blue (the rare ones!) as they drifted in and out of the bubbling waters gently. Every now and then, the familiar rhythmic sounds of a _kakei_ would fill the dawn air, forcing me to bite my lower lip hard at the sudden wave of nostalgia to hit me.

We walked across an elaborate yet simple wooden bridge that seemed shielded with willow and sakura trees. I bet it would look great during the summer months. However, that paled in comparison to the splendor of the traditional Japanese home heralding us as we stepped onto 'land' again. The main house was huge with two intimidating statues of giant frogs (yes, I said frogs) flanking twin pillars leading up to a flight of steps. However, Kakashi didn't take us into this place (which is where I'm sure Jiraiya lived), but to one of the smaller buildings that flanked it. It might have been small, but it still looked comforting and inviting. I was all but drooling at the thought of having a nice bath and lying on something that wasn't likely to kill me in my sleep.

"Oooh, what do we have here?"

For waiting for us at the top of the short flight of steps were two beautiful young ladies, dressed in traditional kimonos (like geishas only without the painted faces), who were apparently going to be our servants for the night.

"They will assist you with whatever you need," Kakashi was saying, though I wasn't paying much attention. I already knew which girl I wanted, and I hated to admit that it was only because she had hair as black as Sasuke's...though not cut in the same style. The other had sort of brownish-reddish hair almost similar to Karin's.

"Jiraiya-sama will see you both later in the day," Kakashi continued. "So try to get some food and rest. I bid you goodnight."

With a polite nod of his head, he spun on his heels and seemed to disappear into the shadows. I swear you could hardly hear his footsteps.

Half-an-hour later, I felt like a new man. Literally. My maid/servant (whatever you want to label her) has been like an angel so far. Her name's Aya and she seemed to have a problem looking at me directly in the face. Or maybe they were trained that way. All the same, she has been the perfect hostess; assisting me with my bath (and no, she didn't actually scrub my back or anything of the sort), setting up my futon and providing a quick dinner that I finished in one gulp. To top it all, she was now playing a beautiful tune on her _shamisen_, and I swear (or maybe it was because I was about to go to sleep), looking at her with her head bowed, her body so still except for her fingers strumming the strings of the instrument, I could imagine...just imagine her being a certain young man...except if I tried to picture him wearing such a feminine outfit, he'd probably kill me.

I chuckled weakly and allowed my lashes to drift closed in weariness while praying...hoping...wishing that someday...somehow...we'd finally meet aga...

"Rise and shine, Uzumaki Naruto!"

_What the hell?_

I lifted my lashes in panic, my mind scattered and unable to comprehend just where I was for a second until I saw the amused visage before me. It was Kakashi, no longer in the expensive-looking suit, but in something more casual and yet with that damn thing still over his mouth. Did he have some kind of mouth disease? Or maybe he had no lips at all?

"What the fuck are you doing here?" I asked irritably. Goddamn it! Feels like I just fell asleep a second ago.

"You've been sleeping for almost ten hours," came the wry reply. He nudged me gently with the tip of his shoe, which I slapped away in annoyance. "Wake up. You have a full schedule today."

With a mock salute, he excused himself, which was good or he would have received a full fledged pillow to the face with that wise-ass expression on it. I had begged for a reason to hate the guy even before meeting him, and so far, he was giving me more fodder than I could have asked for. He didn't seem to give a fuck who I was or that I was related to someone he had probably admired, and though I was glad he wasn't going to beat me over the head with it, it still irritated the fuck out of me. Just who the hell did he think he was?

"Our new mentor," Shika replied while we were eating breakfast in his room, and I had grunted the question at him. "Looks like Jiraiya's leaving him to us for now. Wonder what he plans for us today?"

"Fuck him," I grumbled and stuck some more rice into my mouth. "I'm going to make his life a living hell."

"Stop spraying your food around, man. Close your damn mouth while eating."

"And fuck you too, you brown noser."

Shikamaru snickered and looked unapologetic. "Think of it as a grand adventure. It can't be that bad."

Oh, how wrong he was. The next few hours were spent being shuttled around like a pair of mannequins for Kakashi's sadistic pleasure. We were first introduced to a couple of special tailors, who took our measurements and 'hmmed' and 'aahed' over every damn thing. Clad in disguises, we were then taken to hair specialists, who primped and cut and re-colored my tresses until I could barely recognize myself in the mirror when they were through. Shika got a trim as well and though his hair was back in its usual ponytail, it looked shiny and clean at least. Next stop, a clothing store to update our lacking wardrobe. Kakashi didn't seem too keen on us picking anything too juvenile, stating we were now young men about to enter a world of serious-minded individuals. We couldn't very well be seen wearing jeans and sweatshirts like bums. By the time we left the fancy store, we were laden with enough tailored pants, shirts, jackets, ties, and shoes to rival any of those pansy male models you see in magazines. Hell, he even allowed us to make a quick pit stop at a jewelry store, and though I wasn't too big on anything flashy, I did settle for a nice looking silver necklace with what looked like a crystal prism at the end, while Shika selected a pair of diamond studs for his ears. Had to admit they looked pretty good on him.

"I used to wear them before I got arrested," he explained later that evening as we chilled on the veranda after another hearty supper. While Aya entertained us with her _shamisen_, I lay on my back in repose, enjoying the peace and quiet –

(calm before the damn storm)

...as tendrils of Shika's cigarette smoke danced before my vision every now and then.

"And here I thought you got them pierced while in that hell hole. Any significance to that?" I asked lazily. "Or were you just trying to look pretty?"

He chuckled and shrugged lightly. "It's a family thing I guess. Always had them since I was a kid, so why stop now?" His small smile disappeared and his gaze became thoughtful. "The ones I had on before I was arrested...they were gifts from...Temari."

Her name hung like a lead weight between us, and I knew he was worried about her current situation. By my mental calculation, the girls (and Haku) would probably be on their way back home now. Sasuke should still be en route or in Tokyo already, if everything went as planned.

"I'm sure they'll make it," I said aloud to reassure him and his unspoken fears. "Jae Weong and Cha Seung won't let anything happen to them, you can bet on it."

He tossed me a wan smile. "Thanks, man. I appreciate that."

"Yeah...we've still got a marriage to settle anyway. I'm taking my role as best man seriously."

In the faint gloom of twilight, the hues on his cheeks at my comment made me happy for him. I mean for all his seriousness, it was good to see that one or two things could make him act like a love struck teenager every now and then. I would have probably acted the same way if I was still smitten with Sakura except the tables were turned and instead of a pink-haired beauty filling my thoughts; I found them drifting back toward the dark-haired young man who had given me one hell of a farewell gift. I bit my lower lip and squirmed a little as unwanted images of our last night together came rushing back, and sincerely hoping Shika wouldn't begin to query me about it, I pretended to scratch an imaginary bite on my arm.

Why hasn't he brought up the topic though? I wondered warily. I'm sure he must be damn curious; after all he was the one who thought the whole hickey thing was weird enough. Did he really assume that Sasuke and I had spent all night simply talking? Shika wasn't that dumb. He must have put two and two together, so why wasn't he acting disgusted? Why wasn't he pointing a finger at me and telling me how twisted I had become over giving myself to someone we both once considered the enemy? Was he really okay with it, or did he just not give a damn and had more important things to worry about? But then again, did I _want_ to tell him about it? To explain the reason why it happened? To justify my actions to him...to _anyone_?

"Hey...I was thinking..."

I stiffened at his sudden quiet statement, my heart beginning to jackhammer in my chest. This was it. He was going to query about it now. What the hell would I say? Where could I even begin–?

"Since we're here, I was thinking maybe we should find out where your father was buried and pay our respects to him. What do you think?"

I stared at his profile, my mind desperately trying to reconcile what reality presented and what my wild fantasies had conjured up. Though my heart was still racing, it was now for a different reason altogether. Shika was right. In my quest to hate Kakashi and to embrace my new role as an assassin, I had almost forgotten about that little rite of passage. An immediate wave of shame and sadness befell me at my pettiness, and I made a mental note to swallow my pride and to pester Kakashi about it or at least convince Jiraiya to tell me where it is.

"Might not even be here," I mumbled to myself as I turned away. "Remember he left Kyoto to move down South with my mother. What if he's buried there?"

"Bodies can be moved from one place to another," Shika reasoned quietly. "I'm sure Jiraiya must have had his brought back here to his birthplace." I could feel his gaze on me. "Just ask him when you get the chance. Couldn't hurt, could it?"

No, it definitely couldn't. In fact, it seemed I didn't need to ask either, for the next day when we finally got to see Jiraiya (after what seemed like an eternity), it was the very first thing he brought up in our conversation during breakfast with him. It was also our opportunity to see his accommodations in the larger house, and boy...was it something to behold. I would go into more details about how simple and yet expensive each piece of furnishing looked, but just know that the main thing to stand out was that this guy did have some kind of affinity for amphibians (yes, the damned frogs again). I cannot begin to tell you how disconcerting it is to sit in a room next to a ginormous tank (I swear this thing took up half of the room!), in which sat the largest toad I had ever seen in my life. This ugly thing was at least three feet tall, with large yellow bulbous eyes that refused to blink, and with a skin that was a sickly shade of brown and mottled green. Jiraiya bragged he had caught "Gamabunta" during one of his many hiking trips in the mountains, and it had sacred meaning to him. Besides, Gamabunta was actually quite friendly when you got to know him better. It was just unfortunate he seemed to have a pissed off expression most of the time.

_Whatever you say, man. _All I knew was that this thing crept the hell out of me and I could barely eat anything. In fact, I was damned sure what we were having for breakfast looked like tiny tadpoles swimming in soup, and it was all I could do not to throw up.

Luckily, we survived breakfast with no vomiting or frogs leaping out of nowhere to attack us. Kakashi appeared as soundlessly as he normally did, but only to announce that the car was ready to take us to my father's current location. Unlike the sports car we had arrived in with Kakashi, this particular vehicle seemed more 'fortified' with its tinted windows and the addition of an extra bodyguard, who occupied the shotgun position (Kakashi drove).

I had expected an, at least, hour-long journey, but was surprised to find that the temple and its burial grounds was less than half-an-hour away. Still, its location was quite tranquil and scenic; the perfect final resting place for a man who had only tried to live his life in such a manner. After paying our quick respects at the temple and picking up our supplies, we began the silent trek up the mountain with the aid of aged steps (must have been over a hundred or more) cocooned by massive trees that gave us some reprieve from the mid-morning heat. At the top, I gasped at just how beautiful it was from up here. You could see the entire city beneath us and the mountains shaded by layers of fog in the horizon. I swallowed the hard lump that came to my throat and forced myself to pay attention to the grave stones we walked past. Jiraiya – who was leading the way – finally came to a stop before one that looked no different from the others. Still, one could tell that it was visited regularly, for compared to some other markers, my father's grave looked well-tended and so clean that the marble seemed to sparkle beneath the sun's rays.

I reached out to caress his etched name – a simple Minato Namikaze – as well as the additional name given by the priests once a person went to the afterlife. The last thing I wanted to do was to begin bawling in front of these guys, but damn if my vision didn't suddenly blur and a hard lump form in my throat. Fighting it down as best I could, I began the task of scrubbing the stones and cleansing it with fresh water. I was unaware I was gnawing on my lower lip that hard, until I felt the metallic taste of blood on my tongue.

_Whywhywhywhywhywhywhywhy?_ **Scrub. Scrub. Scrub. ** _Whywhywhywhywhywhy did things have to end up this way? It's _not fair at all!__

"It's okay, Naruto," came the quiet voice behind me and the gentle touch on my shoulder, but I shrugged it off angrily and kept on scrubbing with all the anger, hurt, and frustration I could muster.

"Naruto..."

"I'm okay," I interrupted curtly, though my voice sounded like it came from a million miles away. I realized I had just about scrubbed off his ordained name, and just like that, all the fight in me dissipated as I allowed the brush to slip to the ground from boneless fingers.

_I'm okay. I'm going to be okay, 'tousan. Because I swear I'm going to make them pay. All of them. Every single last asshole that did this to you and 'kaasan. The next time I come here, it's to tell you that you've been avenged. This I promise you. _

I wiped away the blood that had trickled down my chin with a finger and swiped it gently against the base of the gravestone. It looked morbid and obscene, and yet I swear it seemed as if the marble absorbed it greedily until nothing remained but a faint pinkish hue.

I chose to stay behind for a little longer while the others promised to wait for me at the bottom of the mountain. Anyone coming through would have found it strange to see me sitting on the ground and talking to no-one in particular, but I didn't care. I did my best to share most of my life story with my dead father, now definitely sure that he was up there listening at least. My only regret was that my mother's gravestone wasn't beside his. I still have no idea where she's been buried, and I think Jiraiya must have tried his best to find her as well to no avail. Still, I was content to pretend that both of them were probably together anyway.

"...and I swear I was never going to get into another relationship again," I mumbled as I absently tugged on the hem of my shirt. "And don't laugh, but..." I looked around me, my cheeks burning with color before leaning closer to the grave to whisper shyly. "...you don't think what I did with Sasuke was disgusting, do you? I mean it's not like we're boyfriend and girlfriend now, or getting married or anything of the sort, but it's just...I don't..." I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair in exasperation. What was the point of telling them about him anyway? If the living couldn't be a source of comfort in my time of confusion, what could the dead do?

"Just give me the strength to see this through," I finally begged quietly as I clasped my hands before me and bowed my head in prayer. "May all those who now wield power that is not rightfully theirs be punished for their sins."

As I finally rose to my feet and began to head back the way we came, a sudden chill – quite the contrast from the early afternoon heat – had me freezing in my tracks. It had felt like a gentle caress across my shoulders and the back of my neck; a sensation that continued down my arms and all the way to the tips of my fingers. At this point, the chill suddenly became warm; comforting warmth that brought a surge of tears to my eyes because I swear it felt like someone was holding onto my hands and squeezing them gently. I know it's weird and sounds stupid, but it _really_ did _feel_ that way, and I knew the reason for it. Was it also my imagination that I heard my name being called in a disembodied voice that seemed to melt away with the wind? Perhaps. Because just as soon as this strange moment happened, I was all alone again.

I scrubbed at my eyes and took a deep breath, my heart now filled with a confidence and determination that had been lacking all this time I think. In fact, I was so overjoyed at 'seeing' my parents again, I almost missed the man waiting for me at the top of the steps.

"I thought you had left with the others," I queried as he motioned for me to sit beside him.

"And I did," he replied and puffed out a cloud of smoke from the pipe he had been sucking on. "But I came back to make sure you weren't about to destroy Minato's grave in your anger."

"I'm okay now...really," I said quietly before blurting out what I had experienced earlier. I expected him to laugh and tell me I was only imagining things, but I was surprised to see those dark eyes well up with tears before he nodded gravely and looked away.

"Typical," he grated thickly. "Those parents of yours never did understand how to give up easily. I'm glad they got to see how well their son has turned out even though he can still be a knuckle head." He reached out to ruffle my hair gently, causing me to blush and try to swipe at his antics.

"Well then...guess we can get started on the second half of your training," he finally mumbled when he was tired of messing around with me. "And it, oddly enough, begins here."

"Huh?" I eyed the gravestones behind me, but he was waving his hand around him.

"Meditation, Naruto." He tapped his temple gently. "Do you recall me telling you that you'll also have to strengthen your mind as well as your body? You've managed to do well with the body and physical aspect of things, but now, it's time to teach you how to be more in control of your thoughts and how to mask your true emotions. It will not be easy, but we will do our best to teach you."

"We?"

He nodded and like mirages from a dream, Kakashi, Shika, and two priests made their way toward us. It was then that I noticed Shika was carrying a travel bag with a sheepish expression on his visage. Just how long had he been on this with them?

"You'll be staying at the temple for the duration of your training," Jiraiya was saying as he rose to his feet and smiled at me. "I hope you are ready, son."

"Do I have a choice?" I asked with a weary sigh of resignation.

Jiraiya grinned and shook his head. "Afraid not, my boy. Choices are definitely not an option this time around."

* * *

><p>He wasn't kidding when he said it "wasn't going to be easy". I mean, who knew the act of doing something as simple as 'sitting still' for hours on end could be such motherfucking torture? If I dared move or try to scratch an itch, I'd be flogged by one of the priests - who I've nicknamed "Evil Baldie" - across the shoulders. If I dared to crack an eye open, another lash. If I gave a long suffering sigh of boredom...<em>whack!<em>

Unfortunately, that was just the tip of the iceberg.

My day usually started way before the crack of dawn. "Quiet Baldie" would wake Shika and I up and lead us to the temple for early morning prayers, and may I mention that compared to our cozy accommodations at Jiraiya's home, we were now subject to sleeping in conditions that made Byaku-Shinkyou look like paradise! Try sleeping on cold concrete with nothing but a thin pillow and blanket for company. Geez.

After a quick breakfast (that only made me hungrier when done), it was time for at least an hour of meditation (torture), before Kakashi stepped in with our training. My theories about the guy being dangerous and strong as fuck turned out to be true after all. He not only made Shika and I run up those damn steps back and forth several times, but we'd have to spar with him using _bokken_ or _shinai_ around the grounds, and considering I wasn't that much of a sword fighter, I just about got my ass kicked most of the time. Shika seemed to have more fun with him in that department anyway. The best part came in having to test out my shooting skills. Kakashi would time me as I assembled and disassembled the arsenal of weapons he had brought with him. I blessed and thanked Sergei for his brand of teaching, for even though Kakashi tried not to look too impressed, I could see my proficiency did bring a smile or two to his visage.

After lunch was siesta. After siesta was another three-hour block of meditation (where I sort of tried to continue my nap, but you guessed it, Evil Baldie wouldn't let me). Then there was the 'etiquette' class, where we were taught the intricacies of life in the _yakuza_ and acting like gentlemen. Hah! Though I was already familiar with most of the terms, thanks to my association with Kojima, I was still amazed at just how much there was to learn about the damn organization. Factions within factions, clans within clans, bosses within bosses, knowing all the names of the major groups, its leaders, those I had to watch out for and those I had to become friends with. I had to familiarize myself with maps and locations of each main gang/clan/faction, know which ones ran which businesses, know which turfs were off limits, and which ones I could plant seeds of discord in. It really was all confusing and headache inducing, and if it wasn't for Shika helping me study them each night, I swear I'd be so lost it wasn't even funny. He came up with a cool way for me to remember stuff too, like whenever we were doing our run up and down the mountain, for each step, it would represent the name of a member of a particular clan or group. The top step was always easy to remember as that involved the bastards I was gunning after.

Ryoichi Ikegami and Shimura Danzo.

I would make a point to spit on that step and curse it out as loud as I could...at least until Evil Baldie would show up to flog me right down the steps telling me I couldn't be cursing that loud in a sacred place.

_Ah fuck him._

Two weeks went by pretty fast, and I was glad to report that by then, I had finally gotten the hang of meditating because the next phase of my training required me to use every single restraint I could think of.

I was going to be put through torture simulations.

It was a chance to see a side of Jiraiya I never wanted to see ever again. It was a side that had probably made him such a feared member of his faction while active, and I could see why he must have been in line to become a _kumichō_ if he had chosen to go that route.

The first night was easily the worst. Totally unprepared for what was to happen, I was given a rude awakening when I felt a hand covering my nose and mouth before I was dragged out of my cold bed with my hands bound in ropes that dug into the flesh of my wrists. Blindfolded and not sure of where the fuck I was being taken to, I was forced to recall the darkness and misery of my stay at the dungeons of Byaku-Shinkyou. Fear was like a tangible thing; heavy on my tongue and enough to make a grown man break into tears. For endless hours, I remained in my darkened Hell, trying to breathe as normally as I could and to control my emotions as I had been taught so far. Days probably drifted into nights, and I lost count of how long I had been kept here. I wasn't given any food or water either, but thanks to the smaller portions we had been fed since our stay here, my stomach and body was now used to dealing with hunger pangs and thirst.

Eventually, and just when I thought I was close to my breaking point, a burst of light filtered through the dark cloth as the door to my prison was opened abruptly.

(don't speak or beg for mercy)

I was dragged to my feet and shoved into yet another room, but this time I was placed on a chair and finally allowed to see. Took almost a full minute for me to regain my sight, and when I was sure I had stopped seeing stars, I realized I was in a claustrophobic room, where three huge men, I had never seen before, and Jiraiya stood before me...unsmiling.

He paced around me in a manner that made me nervous, but recalling my training, I did my best to 'get away' from the present. What had once taken me nearly hours to achieve, now almost seemed effortless. All I had to do was take a deep breath, close my eyes for a minute and picture myself in a place as far away from this room as possible. In this 'place', I was to feel no pain or acknowledge the presence/concept of pain.

(breathe and contemplate on the body...focus)

"What do you know?" came the sudden cold question wretched from the echelons of my self-induced abyss. "Tell us! What do you know?"

(don't speak or beg for mercy)

(breathe long...breathe deep...focus)

The first strike to my cheek nearly took out my jaw (or probably dislocated it), but I only grit my teeth and bore it in silence, absently swallowing the fill of blood within my mouth.

(don't speak or beg for mercy)

(breathe short...breathe deep...focus)

"Where is the money? Who do you work for? Who sent you here?"

The questions seemed to pummel me from all sides; voices welling into frenzied crescendos that merged into one loud roar within my ears. These were interspersed with hits and blows to my head, stomach, shoulders, and even my legs weren't spared. It got so bad that one particular blow to my torso had me vomiting on myself, but that didn't stop them. Through eyes that now felt swollen and a nose that was probably broken, I sneered at my torturers and even spat out a wad of blood at the huge asshole threatening me. It was the last thing I'd see (or do) before he knocked me out cold.

When I eventually came to, Shika was kneeling at my side in our 'bedroom', dabbing something soothing to my wounds. When he noticed me watching him, he shook his head with a small smile.

"You fucker," he praised reluctantly. "Can't believe you survived all that. Even I was cringing for you from the outside. Jiraiya said you were already like a pro."

I grinned (hell, even that was painful to do). "I've got to thank Byaku-Shinkyou and Sergei for the training so far. What happened in there was child's play compared to the shit I went through."

"I hear you." He motioned for me to turn onto my back so he could continue his treatment.

_Ah bliss. _

"How long was I out?" I asked.

"You mean when you were kidnapped? They kept you in that holding cell for three days. If you mean after getting knocked out? You've been out for almost a day."

"Damn..."

"Anyway, they said this should heal you pretty fast. Jiraiya wants to have another go at it in a couple of days, so get better fast."

For the next week, this continued, where each torture – mental, physical, and emotional – got worse and more intense. I swear there were times when I felt I would crack, where the insults would really hit home or where the beatings would make me want to rage like an animal and take any of the bastards down.

However, by the tenth day, I could feel the _change_ beginning to take place. Picture a gradual hardening shell beginning to form around you like a shield. I had literally come to a point where no matter what threats were hurled my way, I could feel nothing and simply accepted it in maddening silence. I could now look Jiraiya or any of the other assholes in the eye without giving away my murderous intentions. I learned to modulate my tone, to speak in a manner that could fool anyone into believing that I was sincere when I wasn't. I felt slightly distant at times, hardly even speaking to Shika on some nights, or when I did, it was in cryptic sentences that left him looking at me with slight disappointment. However, he had to have known this was going to happen. I couldn't be expected to be too friendly with him especially if our every move was going to be scrutinized from now on.

(no offense to you, my dear friend, but if I give even the slightest hint of knowing you as a companion, your life might be in danger when the time comes)

"Well, I must say you far exceeded my expectations," Jiraiya praised on what would be our last night at the temple. "I was sure you'd have quit half-way through."

I smiled wanly and gave a light shrug. "It's no big deal. All part of the learning process, eh?"

"Yes, well...let's just hope you never actually have to go through any of those simulations in reality," came the low response. "Though you have remarkable healing time, there is no healing from being a corpse, do I make myself clear?"

"Yes, sir."

After one last visit to my father's grave, it was time to head out to the real world only this time, I felt not only stronger physically, but in mind and spirit. Hell, even Aya must have noticed the change in me because there seemed to be a more appreciative glint in her eyes now; a look that any sane hot-blooded male would have recognized and realized as pure lust. Already temptation beckoned, and I honestly had to focus on not giving in to the primal urge to accept her subtle advances.

And though I was ashamed to admit I had not thought much of Sasuke during my training, just picturing his expression of disapproval made me cringe inwardly.

_Damn._ Guess it was back to working with my hands, a bottle of lotion and a box of tissues.

Being celibate sucks!

* * *

><p>"Tonight, you will have dinner with Jiraiya-sama," Kakashi announced about a week later while Shika and I were brushing up on our <em>yakuza<em> information in my bedroom. "In your closets, you will notice some traditional kimonos have been placed for you to wear. Dinner will be served at eight. Please try to make it on time."

Shika and I rolled our eyes at each other – Kakashi, who had still not given any impression that he wanted to become 'friends' with us - could really be a pain in the ass when he wanted to. Still, Shika and I made a promise to meet in the front garden at least ten minutes before dinner started. I honestly didn't feel like getting a scolding from Jiraiya since he was a stickler for being punctual. Last time we showed up late for lunch, he threw his wooden slippers at us and called us lazy, no-good bums who deserved to have our asses roasted over flaming hot coals.

_Ouch. _

As I opened my closet to see what Kakashi was talking about, I noticed that not only was the traditional garb hanging there, but two new suits we definitely hadn't purchased on our shopping spree hung silently in clear wrapping like exquisite items not to be touched. Hell, even without touching them, I knew what they represented and why it was there. Those suits were going to be my new 'work' clothes, and whether I liked it or not, it was a reminder that time was ticking fast and the reality of my new role was just around the corner.

It took a while to get into the black _hakama_ especially when it came to tying the damn _obi _around my waist to hold it up (I had lost a little weight after all). Embarrassed, I had to holler for Aya to help me with it, and by the time we were through, the poor girl had to be the one to dress me up completely. So sue me. I can't remember the last time I had to wear the whole damn regalia just to eat dinner. Give me a comfortable _yukata_ anytime.

Even worse was getting used to walking around with socks and wooden slippers, and I nearly tripped over a few times on my way to meeting Shika, who might as well be born to wear the traditional attire. He looked so comfortable, I hated him on sight.

"Dude," I complained as we made our way to Jiraiya's place. "Why do you have to look so good in that thing?"

"You don't look so bad yourself," he praised with a light nod. "You look half-decent."

"Thanks," I replied sarcastically just as I caught the shadow moving behind us and shook my head in slight awe. One of the cool things about Jiraiya's home is that there were freaking guards _everywhere_ and you wouldn't even know it! These guys were like trained ninjas or something; lurking in the shadows or being as still as death whenever you walked past them. They hardly spoke to you, and if they did, it was to either bow in greeting or relay some message to Kakashi.

"Is it just me or does it seem like there are a lot more guards around tonight?" Shika mused as we crossed the bridge and made our way to the main courtyard.

"Guess that's why," I replied when we noticed about six shiny black cars all parked in a row; a clear sign that this was definitely not going to be some ordinary dinner. Considering that beside each one stood a _yakuza_ in a black suit and dark sunglasses, I had a feeling that I was about to be ushered into a scene one had only seen in the movies.

Kakashi – dressed just like we were- waited at the top of the steps, and after acknowledging each other with polite bows, he led us through the main foyer as he usually did. However, unlike the past where we'd make a right to the small dining area, he led us further down the hallway, where we could hear loud voices engaged in boisterous conversation. Standing like sentries at the screen doors were two more bodyguards, who bowed and slid them open to allow Kakashi, Shika and I into the large and very impressive dining room.

However, just as soon as we were led in, the conversation stopped and you could literally hear a damn pin drop.

(yikes)

In addition to Jiraiya, who sat at the head of the room, six other well-dressed men (in different variations of black traditional wear) sat on large pillows facing each other across a long, low table laden with good food and drink. There was a sickening stench of power and authority in this place, and as I studied each wizened face or chiseled expression (for they too watched me in silence), I felt a tremor of excitement fill my heart at the realization that these were all people who were closely connected to the men I sought to kill or at least had known my father personally. My chest throbbed like a snare drum on acid, and it wasn't until I heard Kakashi's harsh "kneel down and bow, you idiot!", did I realize I was the only one still standing.

I met Jiraiya's amused glance as I dutifully fell to my knees and bowed my head to the _tatami_ mat in respect.

Still a part of me fumed in silent rage -

(you watched him die. You couldn't save him. You let him die!)

...and briefly entertained the thought of taking them all out to satisfy this dark side of me. They would deserve it after all.

"Gentlemen," Jiraiya suddenly boomed as he raised his cup of _sake_ in salutation. "I present to you the son of Namikaze Minato. The long lost Uzumaki Naruto. He will be the one to restore our honor and what was once lost to the senseless greed of those who have failed to honor the sacred codes of the _ninkyō dantai!_ In the names of our glorious ancestors and leaders of the true Bakufu-_gumi_, please join me in welcoming him to the family!"

"Hear hear!" came the responding salute from someone else. "To Uzumaki Naruto and the lasting legacy of Namikaze Minato, the rightful heir to the Bakufu Syndicate. Welcome!"

"WELCOME!"

Their thunderous greeting and applause had me looking up slowly to acknowledge their presence, and though my lips seemed to twitch into a small smile, the once thudding snare in my heart was gradually being replaced by a chill that had me forming tight fists on my lap.

(I see it)

Their smiles. Their eyes.

(I see it all now)

Their nods. Their self-congratulatory mode.

I now knew what I was to become to these men, including the one who mentored me.

(their smiles. How fake and empty the look)

(I see it all)

I was nothing more than their _tool_, a carefully crafted weapon designed to complete what they had started so long ago. To them, I was the missing link to the puzzle, and as I acted out the role of the sheepish newbie, I vowed to finish what my father must have come to realize and had failed in achieving before his death.

I would take every single one of these fuckers down with me.

(payback was going to be a bitch)

* * *

><p><strong>Translations: <strong>

_I sang mu!_ – All clear!


	36. 36: Tales of the City

**Notes:** Yay! Hello, New Readers! *waves* Knew I should be taking longer breaks so folks can do some catching up *lol* I'm so glad some of you are discovering the story despite the craptastic summary that doesn't exactly tell of what's been going on so far, eh? Maybe I should take 'summary classes' or something. All the same, I'm so glad you're still sticking with the story and enjoying it so far. I don't predict this going on for much longer, so for anyone asking "where's the end?", it's gonna happen soon, don't worry! Now is it all going to be rainbow and sunshine and folks singing kumbaya when it's done? Eh...we'll just have to wait and see.

Thanks so very much again for your patience and your support *bows gratefully* I really do appreciate it.

Enjoy!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 36:<strong>

**Tales of the City**

_In the summer night  
>The evening still seems present,<br>But the dawn is here.  
>To what region of the clouds<br>Has the wandering moon come home?_

-**Kiyohara no Fukayabu**

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke: <em>

She would make the perfect wife; if you were into the meek, perpetually flushed, soft-spoken, and well-endowed (in the bosom area) type that is.

Her name is Hyūga Hinata and though Itachi has claimed she's actually quite the fighter and reliable as a spy, I'm yet to be convinced. This girl - who couldn't seem to string two complete sentences together without stuttering - didn't particularly strike me as 'reliable'. However, I could see where her _assets_ would come in handy as a distraction. It would be difficult for anyone to take her seriously and grossly underestimating her abilities could be beneficial in the long run.

She had straight hair, as black as coal, that fell to the small of her back, the heavy bosom (as I've already mentioned) that she didn't seem eager to hide beneath the tight cashmere sweater, and a slender waist leading to hips that the old ways would have considered desirable for childbearing. Her legs were enclosed in a pair of black sweatpants while a pair of white socks hid dainty feet I noticed when we arrived yesterday. Despite all this, it turns out her most startling feature is her eyes. They are extremely pale and under the right light almost give the illusion of being pupil-less (if that makes any sense). There is an odd sensation one feels when looking into them – at least for the brief moments she would allow me to stare into them long enough. It was as if she could read you like a book and know all your secrets without uttering a word.

My curiosity led me to ask Itachi about it, and I wasn't all too surprised at the answer. Apparently, like the Uchiha clan, the Hyūga seemed to have a history of being able to 'see' beyond the surface or the superficial. Although their 'gifts' were not as strong as our clan's, they had been a formidable force in the old days. Unfortunately, it seemed like over time such abilities have been diluted to the point that it's hardly used if at all. A pity really.

"Here you go, Sasuke-sama," she whispered as she shuffled toward me with the tray laden with green tea and some rice cakes; a mid-afternoon snack specifically prepared for me. I fully expected her to spill the contents, but she did manage not to trip over her own feet and proved herself to be quite the capable hostess. I can only guess that is why she visits my brother and Shisui often. They would need a 'maid' to keep things in order around here.

I forced myself to sit up from the pillows, accepting her offering with a light nod of acknowledgement. She remained kneeling beside me as I took a sip of the tea and a bite of the rice cake.

_(hmm...this is actually...)_

"Excellent," I praised before I could control myself. Hated to admit that they tasted even better than the ones Haku used to make. All the same, the rise of color to her features and the tremulous smile following my remark was enough to have me squirming with discomfort. She bowed and seemed to squeak out a breathless "thank you" before rising unsteadily to her feet.

"Is...is there any...anything else you'd like me to get for you, Sasuke-sama?"

I shook my head and focused my attention on the book I had been reading. "I'm fine. Thank you again."

"O...Okay...I'll return in the evening to prepare dinner for all of you," she continued in a voice that seemed to disappear with every word she uttered. My periphery vision caught her reaching for her jacket. "I ha...have to dash off to work now. Good...goodbye."

As she let herself out of the apartment with another bow and smile, I was finally left alone to gather my thoughts. "Work" – by the way - meant her new job as a waitress at an exclusive restaurant not too far from Nagatachō in Chiyoda where the DIET was located. The restaurant was a hub nub for important legislators and government officials (some military included), and it was there that a rumor of an alliance between Orochimaru and General Hanzou was beginning to swirl. Hanzou, who had apparently been one of the military personnel working in the shadows with Shimura Danzo, had now defected to join forces with Orochimaru; something I'm sure Danzo must be furious about if the rumors were indeed true. It wasn't certain that Orochimaru had actually been to the restaurant, but there was no denying the damning photographs of Kimimaro engaged in intense discussions with two figures I recognized as former visitors to Byaku-Shinkyou. This meeting had taken place last week, so it was clear that Orochimaru was already on the move.

_(how much longer must I wait, nii-san?) _

Itachi and Shisui had long gone (with Kisame as well), though I had insisted I follow them. However, they were resolute that I remain in the apartment in case of any news regarding the girls and Haku's arrival. Since they ought to be coming in later this evening, my 'job' was to man the phones in the event of an emergency. I couldn't think of anything going wrong as my trip with Kisame had been relatively pain-free all things considered. It was embarrassing to admit that I had fallen asleep during most of the trip; probably the 'excitement' of the past few days finally catching up to me. All the same, once we arrived at the port, it was another hour of waiting in the bowels of the fishing boat, while Kisame scouted the area to see if the 'coast was clear'. By that, I mean any officer(s) who was willing to turn a blind eye to our arrival.

When it was finally time to leave, words could not describe the almost surreal experience of seeing and stepping foot on Japanese soil again. The reality hit – not with hearing the familiar language and faces – but seeing the all too recognizable parade of uniforms I had once worn proudly. Except for one little...

_(major)_

...difference.

The _mon_ had changed.

No longer did the _kamishimos_ have the familiar Uchiha crest on its chest and back. Instead, a stomach-churning motif of a snake wrapped around a sword within a circle, now signified what the watchdogs had become under Orochimaru's complete control. With the final link to the Uchiha clan (me) finally 'dead', what other reason did the sick bastard have to continue our legacy? How I would have loved to rip those revolting crests right out of their uniforms and shred them to pieces. This was the final straw in his humiliation and destruction of what my brother and I had held so dear, and yet I knew in my current position, I was powerless to do anything.

_(a damn shame indeed)_

Cold, distant eyes danced over me as I lowered my head dutifully and acted like the imbecile I was supposed to be; and though I could not place any of the officers in my memory's database, it was still jarring to be regarded as nothing more than a mere cockroach with their arctic glances. Had I really once been this indifferent and haughty to others? Good grief. No wonder everyone –

_(Naruto)_

...hated my guts in the beginning.

Kisame hailed an inconspicuous taxi, which seemed to drive us around the damn city for seemingly hours. I now realize it was to throw off whoever might have been tailing us, and when both driver (who was 'one of us') and Kisame were satisfied, we ended up in a nondescript apartment building tucked between so many other similar ones, it was difficult to tell one from the other. A perfect hideout if you were the supposed leader of a bunch of rebellious troublemakers.

There had been no tearful reunion of brothers as one might have predicted. I was still suffering the effects of a long trip, dealing with Kisame's smug know-it-all one-sided conversation during the taxi ride, and was just about cranky and ready to snap at anyone stupid enough to push the wrong button. Bless Itachi for noticing for he made the quick introductions to the others in the room at the time; namely Hinata, someone called Sasori and of course Shisui (more of a re-introduction), before showing me to my bedroom.

"Not big on furnishings are you?" I teased wearily as I crashed onto the narrow bed and eyed the Spartan décor with a raised brow. In a corner was a desk and chair of worn wood, on which sat a cheap-looking lamp that emitted a sickly yellow halo. There was a closet just big enough to house a few items of clothing or luggage and a door leading to what I assumed was a bathroom. Plain white-washed walls, no paintings to adorn them or flowers to liven things up… if Haku were here, he'd have a minor heart attack.

Itachi chuckled. "It's not meant to be a permanent residence. If we have to move quickly, I'd rather not deal with a lot of junk. Still comfortable, no?" He walked toward the windows to fling open the thick gray curtains revealing a rather breathtaking view of the Tokyo skyline at night. One could make out the familiar tower – with its iridescent lights – glowing in the distance amongst the millions of other twinkling symbols of modernization. Postcard perfect and a reminder that I was definitely now miles away from Buk-gu.

"Try to get some rest," he was instructing, though he didn't look any better himself. There were lines of fatigue etched within his features, and the dark ensemble (sweater and matching black pants) highlighted how pale he really was. "We have a full plate tomorrow and lots to catch up on."

"What's happening tomorrow?" I asked as I sat up on my elbows; my heartbeat quickening in excitement at the prospect of finally having my chance to begin my revenge on that son-of-a-bitch.

"Meetings," came the cryptic reply. "Nothing you should worry about for now. I don't want you out and about so quickly."

"But -!"

"We need you here to monitor the phones in case any news comes in about Haku and the girls. I am sending Sasori and Deidara to pick them up from the port, and then they'll head straight to a friend of mine who owns a clinic around Shinjuku. Haku's not yet a hundred percent after all."

I scowled and threw my arms up in frustration. "I didn't come all the way here just to begin babysitting and waiting around doing nothing! I want tommmphff!"

The sudden hug took my breath away, and it wasn't just that he had sat down so quickly beside me or tugged me to his chest at the same time either. I could feel my body burn with embarrassment at the intimate gesture, and worse – a damn stupid lump forming hard in my throat as I realized –

_(I've missed you, nii-san. I've missed you more than I care to admit)_

...just how good it felt to be held like this again.

"I know you are impatient," came the low words within my hair. "And believe me when I say everything we've been doing has been to get you ready to begin, Sasuke. So please...trust me enough to know I have only your best interests at heart. Your time will come, little brother. That I promise you."

The hard kiss placed on my head would have had me bursting into childish tears, but I fought against them with a bite of my lower lip, not daring to look at him as he finally released me. I could sense him smiling, which irritated me a little because he probably knew I was trying not to let go of the waterworks anyway.

"Ah before I forget," he continued with a hint of amusement in his tone. "Seems like Naruto's safe and sound in Kyoto with Jiraiya. They arrived with no incidents."

I tried. I _really_ did try not to let the news affect me as much, but damn if my heart (and body) didn't have other plans to humiliate me. Not only did my pulse quicken at this announcement, I just had to look up with what I was sure was uncontrollable happiness as a wave of relief – so strong- nearly left me weak kneed. However, Itachi's knowing smile dampened my enthusiasm a little, but it was too late to mask it now. He _knew._

"Ah...eh...that's good," I finally managed to mumble with as much nonchalance as I could muster. Pity his chuckle only had my cheeks flaming hotter still. God, I hate older brothers!

"I take it my little advice finally came in handy, didn't it?" he asked, which earned him a shrug as I flopped back to the bed and turned my back to him. I made of show of yawning as if suddenly weary of the whole affair.

"I don't know what you're talking about," I lied.

"Fair enough," came the reply, which was a little surprising as I was sure he was going to be insistent on discussing my relationship. I listened to him rise to his feet, unaware of just how taut my entire being was for some reason. "I'll see to you being able to communicate with him every once in a while, though it has to be very far and in between, after all...we don't want _them_ knowing you two are in cohorts, all right?"

Ouch. How could I have forgotten about that? A part of me had been hopeful that I'd be able to speak to Naruto in some form or fashion, but Itachi's reminder of how tricky that might be was yet another reminder of how far apart we had become. It was just the first...or second or third night and yet I could feel the gulf widening with every breath I took.

_(what are you doing now, Naruto? How is Jiraiya treating you? Is he taking the place of your father already? Do you even still think of me or are you already so warped up in your search for vengeance that I have become nothing more than a misty memory?)_

"Stupid," I whispered and forced my eyes closed to try to get some sleep. What was the point of agonizing over someone who was many miles away? My focus ought to be on Haku, Temari and Karin's safety, and the least I could do was obey Itachi's instructions and monitor their return for now.

The next morning, over a hasty breakfast, (and at my incessant query) I was finally given a briefing of what had been happening so far. It was how I learned of Hinata's role and how much progress had been made with Akatsuki's attempts at wooing more legislators to their side and against Danzo's influence.

"Our propaganda seems to be working," Shisui admitted. "Danzo's been laying low, but that doesn't mean he hasn't been pulling the strings in some shape or form. However, with Hanzou showing his face now and being more active, we've got our hands full dealing with Orochimaru's latest move."

"Hanzou is the acting Chief of Staff," Itachi explained. "In other words, he's the one who gives military advice to the Prime Minister and the Minister of Defense, both of whom are still in Danzo's pockets as we speak. With such power on Orochimaru's side now...we might be looking at an all out..."

"...war?" I finished in a voice that sounded devoid of emotion.

The older men didn't respond immediately, but they didn't need to. Their silence spoke volumes. An all out war with a man like Orochimaru, who had the entire police force and now possibly the military on his side...how could we compete? What army could we possibly come up with to combat such an impenetrable defense?

"Fuck," I breathed and stabbed the grilled fish with my chopsticks.

"What's so funny about all this," Shisui mused. "Is while Orochimaru's plotting to take over the fucking world, Danzo's got his own agenda to overtake Orochimaru…and we're stuck in the middle."

"Not if Naruto and Jiraiya keep to their end of the bargain," Itachi replied with a bitter chuckle. "Saves us the trouble of having to combat two forces at the same time. He did say to give Naruto at least a month before they begin to make their move." He looked at me then. "Should give us enough time to catch you up to speed and introduce you to our little 'team' if you wish to call it that."

"Also work on your training," Shisui interjected with a smirk. "Heard you're a bit soft now."

I opened my mouth to tell him just how 'soft' I had become (probably emphasizing that by stabbing his hand with my chopstick), but he was already rising to his feet with a curt nod in Itachi's direction. "Let's jet," came the curt command which had my brother tossing a brief look of silent apology in my direction.

"Hinata will keep you company for most of the day," he said. "If you need anything, just let her know and she'll be glad to assist."

That was almost five hours ago, and now with Hinata gone, I was allowed to explore my new abode with no interruptions. Like my bedroom, the rest of the apartment was no different. There were the necessary furnishings: a mix of western and traditional with the presence of a dining table next to the kitchen, a leather sofa, and a low coffee table with the large pillows I had been sitting on. Instead of _tatami_ mats, the floor was of polished wood with a rug thrown here and there. A small television sat on a cabinet that only had a few magazines for décor. Considering my brother was an avid reader, I found this strange. However, my doubts were appeased when I opened one of the doors, in the short but narrow corridor, to reveal a 'den' of sorts. Compared to the almost antiseptic feel of the other rooms, this place was cluttered with 'stuff'. It was a small and windowless room with two desks facing each other; one with two black telephones connected to what seemed like a radio (and a reminder of the same set up back at Jae Weong's communication room). The other table was laden with folders/dossiers of just about every damn government official or _yakuza_ in the country. I couldn't believe just how much information Itachi and Shisui had collected on each individual. They really had been doing their homework. On the wall, a notice board took up one side of the room, were photographs, maps, markings, pins to highlight important locations and scribbled notes dazzled one's eye at first glance. The other side of the room contained several cabinets with even more dossiers within and a floor-to-ceiling shelf stocked with enough reading material to keep one occupied for weeks. Cardboard boxes were stacked haphazardly in a corner; some empty, others with documents I didn't have the time to sift through at the moment.

_(phew. This could take a while)_

"Might as well get started," I muttered to myself as I sat behind the desk with most of the dossiers on our 'enemies' and plucking the most current (which was on General Hanzou) from the top of the pile, I settled in for a crash course on just what I was going to be up against.

* * *

><p><strong>Somewhere in the Nishitama District, Tokyo<strong>

**Four Months Later**

Jūgo rubbed his hands together and blew into them, desperately trying to keep warm despite the jacket and wool scarf he had wrapped around his neck. It might be the month of August and yet it was terribly cold this time of the night. He couldn't understand it. It didn't help that he had to wait out here while Kimimaro was engaged in a never-ending meeting with some councilmen (and _yakuza_, Jūgo was sure) within the compound behind him.

Perching on a stone marker to keep watch, he idly shook his head at the driver of their rented Sedan who mutely offered him a cigarette. The driver shrugged and stretched before sauntering over to his fellow comrades – other drivers of the five parked matching Sedans in the vicinity – to engage in conversation. In addition to those men, there were also silent bodyguards like Jūgo, some of who were content to remain the shadows; unseen but ready to spring into action should the situation call for it.

Jūgo glanced toward the high gates of the councilman's home and pursed his lips in thought. This was a rarity in itself; for Kimimaro to insist that he follow him on this particular trip. Usually Kimimaro traveled with either Sakon or Ukon (or both), but for some reason Orochimaru-sama's second-in-command had picked him as a travel companion this time around. These trips back and forth were now more frequent especially after the unsuccessful fire started by Suigetsu several months ago.

Jūgo groaned at the memory of the catastrophe that had been and the subsequent backlash they had received from Itachi-sama for the brash idea. There was a reason the blueprints had been given to them to study. Specific areas of Byaku-Shinkyou were to be targeted, but that stupid hothead had grossly underestimated how fast the fire would spread and even worse, how prepared the officers and prisoners were ready to combat such an incident happening again. Almost as soon as it began, the alarms went off, sending loyalists into action. By the time everything was under control again, just a section of the officers' mess and a part of the administrative building had suffered the brunt of the flames.

To say Suigetsu had _not_ been pleased would have been the understatement of the century. Despite Kiba trying to explain that there was nothing they could have done anyway, Suigetsu seemed determined to put the blame on both he and Jūgo for not being as pro-active as he was. He argued that Itachi-sama would have approved of what he had done, but his bubble was burst rather quickly when they received the scathing coded message from their leader about how irresponsible his actions had been. Not only was Suigetsu risking the lives of more innocent prisoners as well as risking the possibility of being caught as the culprits, there was the likelihood of completely destroying a residence that the Uchiha brothers did plan to return to when this was all over and done with. With strict instructions not to do anything else unless commanded to, Suigetsu was left grumbling with his tail between his legs, though he took out his frustrations by doing his best to make the lives of junior officers a living hell in anyway he could manage it.

Either way, the time was drawing near. Jūgo could feel it. It was the reason why Orochimaru and Kimimaro-sama were more urgent in their dealings with these high-ranking officials. It was why there had been secret drills carried out in the mountains back in the North, and Jūgo had been alarmed to hear Kimimaro reveal that they had at _least_ (meaning there could very well be more) a thousand officers ready to deal with any incoming attacks. There was simply no way anyone could just wander into Byaku-Shinkyou to take out Orochimaru-sama. If push came to shove, then Jūgo knew Itachi-sama would really have no choice but to rely on him, Kiba and yes, even Suigetsu, to get the job done since they were already on the inside.

_Even that's going to be difficult, _Jūgo thought with light frown. Lately it seemed like Orochimaru-sama had been in hiding, no one knowing where he was or what he was up to. Kimimaro was the more visible leader in the more recent weeks, and even though Jūgo had done his best to get the older man to give him answers, Kimimaro remained elusive and abstract with his responses.

So lost was he in his thoughts that the sudden loud **BANG!** and subsequent cries of surprise had him looking up with confusion. It took him a second later to realize that the noise was the report of a semi-automatic going off…and _still_ going off as a white van zoomed right past still firing at anything in sight. Jūgo cursed beneath his breath and dove to take cover behind a clump of bushes, hands reaching for his pistol – though he would have preferred to fight with his _katana_ – still this was no time to be choosy about the weapon of choice. Chaos reigned as bodyguards and the drivers did their best to combat their attackers, and Jūgo could only watch in horror as several bodies were peppered with bullets, engaging in the wild dance of death before collapsing to the ground in pools of their own blood.

He tried to steady himself and to aim at the van (there seemed to be another one making the turn and approaching rapidly), but found himself wondering if these were members of Akatsuki. What good would it to do for him to shoot a member of his own organization? And yet he knew that if he didn't fire back (or at least pretend to), he might risk being considered a traitor by those he was currently allied with.

"Fuck!" He ducked as the bullet whizzed right by his head. Lodging itself into the fence behind him to send flakes of wood into the air and almost blinding him in the process, Jūgo scrambled around the corner; his aim to get into the house and possibly rescue Kimimaro before it was invaded. From the look of things, the security within the compound were now aware of what was happening outside as more of them began to stream out to give support. Jūgo took the opportunity to slip inside, his breathing harsh within his ears as he sought out his boss. Unfortunately -

"No one is allowed to cross," came the curt command from a burly man almost seven feet tall, who stepped out of nowhere to block Jūgo's path.

"But I came with Kimimaro-sama -"

"I don't care if you came with the fucking Prime Minister," the man grated and shoved Jūgo aside impatiently. "No one's getting past here unless I say so."

"It's okay," came the quiet but firm voice that sounded like a blessing to Jūgo. Kimimaro was walking out of the home and down the path, and though his features were pensive, he did his best not to give away his agitation at the chaos occurring outside the gates. "He is with me."

The burly guard looked put off at this. "You should not be outside, Kimimaro-dono," he grunted. "The boss said to make sure you are all hidden within -"

Kimimaro motioned for him to hold his peace before flashing a brief smile at his concerned friend. "I have back up plans to escape in a situation like this," he whispered once out of earshot of the guard. "Around the back is another car that should take us back to our hotel." He stopped talking long enough to examine the bigger man. "You weren't hurt, were you?"

"No…I don't think so," Jūgo replied with a weak smile. He blushed at the sensation of Kimimaro's hand upon his cheek; the gentle caress that spoke of more intimate liaisons between them in the past. It was something he'd rather not share with Suigetsu or Kiba, but he had a feeling they already had an idea about this side of their relationship anyway.

As he walked after Kimimaro, he wondered – and not for the first time – if there really was a way to 'save' his friend. In those private moments, when naked bodies languished in a sea of heady satiation, when breaths struggled to recover from their exertions in lovemaking, when Jūgo was content to hold Kimimaro close to him in an embrace as they watched the stars…in those moments, Jūgo could forget that he was with a person who worked directly for the enemy. In those moments, they were simply long lost childhood friends who could share the most intimate of secrets without fear of retribution. He had almost broken character a few times to spill his concerns and fears to Kimimaro, to make him understand that he didn't have to keep working for Orochimaru-sama. And yet, Jūgo knew – deep down inside – that whatever he might say would fall on deaf ears. If there was one major fault with Kimimaro, it was his stubbornness and loyalty to a fault. He would die for Orochimaru if need be; no matter how terrible his master's madness had become or what diabolical doctrines he continued to instill within his false kingdom.

"Sometimes…" Kimimaro began enigmatically as they slipped into the waiting Sedan, which immediately sped away into the night. "The necessary has to be done…"

"The necessary?" Jūgo asked with a raised brow.

He received a small smile that didn't quite reach Kimimaro's eyes, and as the world suddenly seemed to tremble on its axis, Jūgo would turn around just in time to see the billowing mushroom cloud of fire and smoke erupt from the very home they had left barely minutes earlier.

"Wha…what did you do?" came the breathless gasp as Jūgo felt his heart slam hard within his chest in fear and dismay. "What in God's name did you do?"

"What needed to be done," came the cryptic reply. "What absolutely needed to be done."

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke:<em>

In glum silence, we watched the news on the television where the Prime Minister was currently addressing the nation regarding the stunning events that took place overnight.

_"...our hearts are heavy today at the unfounded loss of six of our most hard-working, dedicated and loyal servants of the Japanese people. In an unforeseen and cowardly attack, these men were taken away from us before their time at a meeting place. We have cause to believe it is nothing more than a domestic terrorist attack, and you can be sure that my cabinet will devote every waking minute to finding those responsible for this and bringing them to justice. Our thoughts and prayers go out to the families of those we have lost. May their efforts not go to waste as we continue to fight for Japan's freedom..."_

(bullshit)

What the Prime Minister (and I'm guessing the media that's been paid off to keep it under wraps) has failed to mention is that the meeting did not just involve the 'hard-working members of the government', but the seedy underbelly of the Japanese mafia as well. If the Prime Minister chose to really disclose more information about what was really going on, he'd confess to the real reasons behind why such an ambush had occurred in the first place. These were men who were really in cohorts with Shimura Danzo masquerading under the ruse of being concerned about the state of affairs in the nation. How Kimimaro had gained access into the proceedings was still a mystery, but from what Jūgo was able to disclose in his coded message, Orochimaru had set things up in this way. Kimimaro would worm his way into the fold (hence his frequent visits to the city in the past few months) where Orochimaru's minions would then appear as the 'surprise attacks' to destroy the proceedings the only way he knew how. To think that he had planned this far ahead; also managing to take out a good chunk of his opponents...it was almost _frightening._

What this meant was that Orochimaru would begin to privately fund up-and-coming councilmen to replace those he eliminated thereby strengthening his hold on the DIET and its policies. He was becoming stronger and stronger while we...we...

(need to build up our army)

_What army?_ I wanted to sneer out loud in derision.

I tore my gaze away from the television to eye my companions in the underground Akatsuki hideout; a place disclosed to me several weeks ago. Most of the occupants I had already been introduced to, and though I can't say everyone warmed up to me at first sight, it was still interesting to see the caliber of members Itachi had managed to gather so far. Some of them were no older than myself; all young men and women with a strong and passionate desire to restore their country back to what it was.

For starters, it was surprising to find that Hinata had a relative in Hyūga Neji; a man who exhibited the same pale eyes and jet black hair, but that was where the similarities ended. Where Hinata was shy and prone to keeping to herself, Neji had the qualities of a natural leader and I could almost picture him being a part of the watchdogs...in a high-ranking capacity (perhaps the leader of a squad or two). He didn't smile much and tended to be blunt with his observations. It was established from the moment we were introduced that we were not going to be the best of friends anytime soon, but at least we were going to have to work together to achieve our common goal.

The young man sitting next to him went by the name of Rock Lee. Gregarious and out-going, he was quite a contrast to Neji and yet those two seemed to be the best of friends. I had to admit that watching the way he acted reminded me of Naruto's enthusiasm and fervor at times; emotions I would rather not have to deal with as anything likely to remind me of the blond created bouts of disconcerting loneliness. Itachi had tried to contact Naruto on my behalf, but for some reason, it was difficult to locate them.

"Probably training," Itachi had deduced cryptically when prodded. "Jiraiya did mention something about making sure Naruto was completely ready for what was ahead."

Shaking my head to get rid of the troubling thoughts, I darted my gaze to the tomboyish female beside Lee. She went by the name of Tenten, and from the few training sessions I've had with her, watching her dexterity with her arsenal of weapons, was quite impressive. I had thought no one could throw a knife faster than Haku, but I was proven wrong. Tenten had such an unbelievable quick wrist action almost giving the illusion she was hardly moving though you were likely to find three or four knives buried within your flesh before you realized it. What was even more surprising, and dare I say refreshing, was that she didn't seem too enamored by my presence. If you haven't been keeping track, you might have noticed that most of the females in my life so far have the tendency to blush excessively, throw themselves at me, or consider me as some sort of a creature to be revered from afar. To Tenten, I could be just another furnishing in the room for all the attention she paid me. She seemed far too intent to woo Neji's affections in her own way.

Leaning against the wall, with arms crossed before him, was the one called Aburame Shino. Prone to wearing dark glasses and hoodies most of the time, he spoke only when absolutely necessary which was hardly at all. He seemed content to follow orders or chip in when needed, but there was no denying his fighting ability. I was impressed with his _katana_ skills; a weapon he seemed to prefer rather than the pistol. I also learned he was quite good at reconnaissance, which would no doubt come in handy eventually.

Next to Tenten was the long-haired blond who has been staring at me for most of the time we've been here. In fact, from the moment we were introduced, the annoying loudmouth (who went by the name of Deidara) seemed intent to let me know that he was quite a fighter. During sparring sessions, he would insist on taking me on, and though he's yet to really be a challenge, I do have to give him kudos for his ability to think quick on his feet. Besides, he was more skilled in rigging up explosives or detonating them; pistols or _katanas_ were too cumbersome for him (or in his words: "cramped his style").

Next to him sat the quiet red-head Sasori, who I have now come to realize is actually older than me despite his height and baby-ish features. Smart as a whip, I could see how his intellect has been useful to my brother's organization over the years. His skill lay in stealth mostly (he made for an excellent spy) and long-range combat. He too, I could see as a possible member of the watchdogs, and I briefly entertained the idea of bringing that to the table when this fight was over and done with.

Next to him was Karin, who flashed a small smile at me when she noticed I was looking at her. Propped between Sasori and Kisame, she appeared a little different than how she had come across while at Buk-gu. More studious and serious since their arrival, there was now an all-business aura around her I could appreciate. Perhaps being back on Japanese soil had made her realize just how serious this whole affair was. Although I could be imagining things, but I get the feeling that she hasn't exactly been warm toward Hinata for some reason. Speaking of which...it looked like Hinata had taken a liking to my loyal friend, for both of them were propped together at my feet with eyes still glued to the television screen.

Haku had returned with a slight limp, a bag full of medication, strict instructions to get as much rest as possible, but still excited (almost ridiculously so) when we were finally reunited. I was glad to hear that the trip had gone with no problems, although they had been held up at the port in Buk-gu for over an hour due to some miscommunication between Jae Weong and an official he had thought he paid off. Temari would stay just long enough with us at Itachi's apartment before leaving for her 'job' within the DIET and renting an apartment close by. I was hoping she'd be able to contact Shikamaru and from there get word on Naruto's progress, but so far, even she has been unable to achieve any promising information.

"I don't know about you all," Kisame finally drawled as the press conference dissolved into a series of tacky commercials and the T.V. eventually turned off. "But I think it's time we get started Itachi." He looked pointedly at my brother, who sat at the head of the table with his chin resting on tented fingers in deep thought. Everyone, actually, now seemed to be watching him...waiting for his decision on what we ought to do next.

"We can only deal with the propaganda side of things for so long," the big man continued as his canines flashed in the faint gloom with homicidal intent. "How many more folks does he have to murder before we take him out?"

_(good point)_

Itachi lowered his lashes, saying nothing to this, and just when I thought I was going to go mad with frustration and impatience, he finally lifted them but only to meet my gaze which he held steady.

"I did promise we were getting things prepared for you, didn't I, Sasuke?"

"...what?" I blinked in confusion as he broke into a small smile.

"Let them in Shisui," came the quiet command that had me sitting up a little straighter.

As ordered, Shisui rose to his feet to make his way to a door I hadn't even noticed (you have to understand that this room isn't exactly the most well-lit). He opened it, seemed to speak to someone behind it before opening it wider. The first person to step out had me gasping in shock for it seemed like I was being thrust back into time, experiencing a surreal scene from a dream or nightmare...or both. I couldn't fucking believe it!

"...what in the world...?" came the weak stutter from me as I rose to my feet unsteadily.

One after the other they marched out...officers that had once been under my command within the walls of Byaku-Shinkyou. Men I had spent so many hours, days and years training and molding into perfect 'soldiers'. Men I had even gone on missions and patrols with. Men I thought mocked me behind my back and only obeyed because of my ranking and what I meant to Orochimaru. Hell even that dumb but efficient Captain Kurobachi was here! Was it stupid to feel a hard lump in my throat as each of them fell to their knees in the utmost sign of respect accompanied by a sincere greeting of "Welcome back, Sasuke-sama". The first squad – MY First Squad - considered the strongest and most respected in all of elite force...more than half of them had defected to be with us. But..._how?_

"During the ambush," Itachi explained at my unspoken question. "Most of them left as well...escaped more like. They went into hiding and it's taken a lot of convincing to get them to join us again."

"There are more of us," Officer Touya replied with a nod of agreement to what Itachi had confirmed. "Scattered across the country, and we are ready to go into battle with you, Sasuke-sama. When we heard you weren't dead after all..." He stopped as his voice thickened, and it was embarrassing to notice that some of them were actually crying silently. "We were so relieved," Touya finally continued when he gathered himself. "We want to restore Byaku-Shinkyou to what it once was, Sasuke-sama. So simply give us the order and we'll carry it out. Please...let us fight by your side again with you as our Captain."

_(all of you...thank you...from the bottom of my heart...I thank you)_

I caught Haku's eyes, which were – no surprise – shimmering with unshed tears. I had to look away quickly for fear he'd notice just how much this meant to me as well, and taking a deep breath I gave a curt nod to Itachi in understanding.

"All right," I finally said out loud. "What's the plan for now?"

"The plan is to begin moving up North in groups or sections," Shisui began as he unfurled a rolled up map which had been propped against the wall. He spread it out on the table – everyone else moving aside to make room for it – and began to point out specific locations which were already highlighted.

"We have a base about twenty miles from Byaku-Shinkyou," he continued. "However, our reconnaissance has revealed that Orochimaru has several officers stationed at the border. We can easily take them out if it comes to a skirmish that's no problem. All the same, there are at least a hundred men currently at the base setting things up for our arrival. We've been lucky to encounter no adversity so far. Weapons are being imported from Russia and North Korea – all smuggled on ships that pose as cargo for oil. We begin sending in officers from Sapporo since they are the closest. Once they're close to the base, the next batch of officers will begin the journey from Sendai -"

"How are they getting there?" I interrupted with a raised brow.

"Disguised as new recruits, tourists or hell just plain blue workers looking for a job up North," Itachi replied with a light shrug. "We do not plan to draw attention to ourselves by wearing uniforms and marching in there with weapons from the get-go. All of that will be provided when they arrive at the base. When we have all assembled, Kiba or Suigetsu will be the one to give us an update on the situation within the grounds. We have to be _sure_ Orochimaru is actually still in Byaku-Shinkyou. So far he's been elusive, so no one knows if he's actually there at all."

"Or worse buried within the many hidden underground tunnels he's built for himself," I grumbled, while rubbing a hand across my forehead in mild irritation. "It's almost as if the blueprint we did is now useless."

"Not quite," Itachi replied with a smile. "All the officers and Akatsuki members will study them thoroughly so they know exactly where to target once we get there. Kiba, Suigetsu and Jūgo will have to be our guides when it comes to the unknown areas, but Sasuke..."

"What?"

"You should know more about that place that those three. Besides...Orochimaru's your main goal, isn't he?"

"Naturally," I replied coldly. "It's understood that he'll be left to me once we get there. Now..." I cracked my knuckles and leaned closer to the map with brows furrowed. There was so much more I needed to know and the sooner it was explained to me, the better.

"Tell me again just how we plan to..."

* * *

><p>The meeting was finally adjourned in the wee hours of the morning, and even though we were back in the apartment Sleep was an elusive creature. Every fiber of my being seemed wired and taut with the tension and strain of knowing that in a few weeks I'd be on my way back 'home'; only this time home would be a battleground. A small part of me felt like screaming that I wasn't ready yet, that I didn't know what kind of a monster awaited me back there, and yet when I recalled the horrific stories Kurobachi had recounted after the meeting...it made my resolve even stronger to destroy everything Orochimaru stood for.<p>

"It was awful, Sasuke-sama," Kurobachi had revealed quietly as we stood beneath the awning of the café above ground while the other members of the group slinked away into the night as silent as shadows. With his shoulders slumped and his expression one of despondency, it was hard to believe this huge man had once been considered "the terror" thanks to his strict methods of teaching while in Byaku-Shinkyou. I wouldn't even have minded hearing his brand of crude humor, something he and Asuma had in common and could torture me with when I didn't care to listen. Unfortunately, that Kurobachi was gone. In its place was a man who had seen enough horrors to last him a lifetime.

"The way he went about rounding up innocent families," Kurobachi was saying. "Even when we tried to explain that they weren't all members of the Uchiha clan, he wouldn't listen. You should have seen his eyes that day, Sasuke-sama...empty...hateful...cold. I have never felt as terrified as I did that day, and I'm not ashamed to admit it. I knew there and then that I had to get out of there or I was going to be next. He had them all executed in front of the townspeople...mothers, fathers...children...babies for God's sake! Beheaded and bodies burned like they were worthless. If you walk into town it's all there like a macabre reminder of his power...hundreds and hundreds of wooden stakes in the ground with the heads of everyone he's killed; some still decaying...others now nothing more than skulls."

His harsh sob was alarming, and never having comforted a grown man before, I didn't know what the hell to do. I could only form tight fists and force myself to squash down the well of hate that rose like bile to my throat.

"It's okay, Kurobachi-san," I finally said tightly. "We'll bring justice to those innocent lives taken. You'll see." I reached out to squeeze his shoulder in reassurance, and the look of pure gratitude he gave almost made my stomach sink with the weight of the burden I was now about to bear. "Wipe your tears and return to your officers," I commanded firmly. "Let them not see you like this."

He nodded and wiped his cheeks with the sleeves of his shirt, took a deep breath and composed himself as best he could. "Thank you, Sasuke-sama...although I must say..."

"Hmm?"

He smiled then; that familiar shit-eating grin I could have done without. "You have changed from the last time I saw you."

I could feel my cheeks flushing in embarrassment, never more glad for the dark shadows around us or I would have had some explaining to do.

"Is it a new woman in your life?" he asked with a wag of his brows. "One of those beautiful belles I noticed in the room earlier, eh?"

"You should head back," I replied curtly, not wanting to divulge my personal affairs with him. Next thing I know it will spread like wild fire around the other officers. "We have a long day of training tomorrow."

He looked like he was about to protest, but seemed to think better of it. He settled for a polite bow before joining up with the group of men who had been waiting for him at the corner of the street. Making sure they were out of sight, I slipped the hood of my sweatshirt over my head and met up with Haku – who was dressed in similar fashion – waiting for me as well. His limp was no longer as pronounced for the stubborn bastard had been intent on strengthening himself with vigorous therapeutic exercises and training even though he had been told not to over exert himself too much. Still, it did feel good to have him around again, and as we made our way back to the apartment complex, we both agreed that it still felt strange having to walk around like criminals in our own country. Just the sight of a watchdog, wearing that damning new crest, had us lowering our heads and trying to blend into the shadows.

(talk about unnecessary stresses)

With a heavy sigh, realizing that courting sleep was no longer feasible, I slid out of bed (making sure I didn't trip over Haku who had shunned the idea of sleeping in another apartment and was content to sleep on a futon in my room) and headed to the kitchen to get something to drink. However, my feet froze in mid-stride, when in the hallway, as familiar voices drifted to me from the living room area; voices I recognized as belonging to Itachi and Shisui. Making sure I wasn't heard, I held my breath and tiptoed closer still, having to crane my neck a little to see what they were up to. I swear if they were in the middle of an embarrassing make-out session, I was going to have to disrupt them, but luckily the scene seemed innocent enough.

They were on the sofa, Shisui sitting with my brother sprawled across its length with his head resting upon the older man's lap. The only source of illumination came from the full moon outside the opened windows, bathing them in an almost ethereal glow that brought a lump of sadness to my throat. Why? For in that moment, I had actually pictured Naruto and I in such a position...that it just didn't fair we were miles apart when we could be like this, sharing our deepest thoughts and desires in soft whispers...my fingers running through his hair like Shisui's was doing with my brother...seeing the tenderness within those features that could look so cold and distant during the daytime and now filled with so much love for my brother when alone together.

_(I miss him...goddamnit)_

I would have slinked back to my room to wallow in my misery when the next words out of Shisui's lips had my stomach dropping in disbelief.

"...should tell him, don't you think?"

"Not yet," came the low mumble from Itachi. "If he knows now it's all he's going to be concerned about. I need him focused on what we're about to do."

Shisui seemed to nod in understanding and after a minute of silence, he continued softly. "Surprised that Danzo took him in so quickly."

"Danzo's desperate and Jiraiya's ploy worked out great."

"Which was...?"

"To gain Naruto notoriety and draw Danzo to him. Naruto's now quite the badass I hear."

"No longer a pain in the ass?"

Itachi chuckled weakly. "The goal was to get Naruto well-known on the streets, starting up trouble and taking out a few of Ikegami's men in the process. He was also to ally himself with the Mibu who are now working with Danzo, remember? Word gets around about Naruto's antics and Danzo wants to meet the blond wonder for himself. Apparently Danzo was so impressed, he's already beginning to assign tasks to him."

"...who's his first target?"

"Still working on it," Itachi replied. "I'll get Temari to give me an update tomorrow. She's been able to speak to Shikamaru and they think it's going to be Councilman Ishida."

"Orochimaru's ally?"

"Yes."

"Lucky us. Wonder when he'll get around to taking out Onoki?"

"Let's hope it never gets to that point," Itachi whispered with a yawn. "Look...can we not talk about this anymore?" he adds with a pouty whine that's unlike him. "I'm dead tired and want to go to bed."

I watched as he raised an arm to wrap it around Shisui's neck forcing the older man closer to waiting lips that sealed his in a languid kiss that all but spoke of their intentions from here on out. Having seen enough, I slipped back to my room quietly, my head and heart pounding with all I had seen and heard.

_(Naruto...Naruto...Naruto...Itachi had news about him and wouldn't tell me! Goddamn it!)_

"Sas...Sasuke-sama?" came the low groggy mumble from Haku as I nearly stepped on him in my agitation and haste.

"Go back to sleep," I whispered harshly and flopped onto my bed. My head was beginning to throb. I didn't know whether to punch something or to scream or to storm back out there and call him out for lying to me about not hearing anything from the Jiraiya camp after all this time. How the hell could he do this to me?! To keep my mind focused on the task ahead? Yes, sure I can understand that I need to be focused, but for God's sake! Would it have killed him to say that "Naruto was fine"? How much of a distraction could that have been? So yes, perhaps he doesn't realize just how close Naruto and I have become and assumes that we're still in the borderline 'friends' stage, but it still didn't give him the fucking right to hold out on me!

My mood was no better in the morning, and it was unfortunate that he had to be the first face I saw as I stumbled my way into the kitchen to nourish myself before heading out for a quick jog.

_Asshole._

"Good morning," came the tentative greeting and smile. "Did you sleep...?"

He froze in mid-question as I glared at him and brushed past Haku – who was busy preparing breakfast and must have realized I was definitely not in the mood for whatever chirpy greeting he had in store for me. He turned back quickly to cooking and pretended as if I hadn't entered the room at all.

I slumped into the chair across from my sibling, coldly staring at him as if hoping I could telepathically convey my disapproval of how he's treated me so far. Haku must have finally gotten the message that this was a conversation between brothers because he quickly excused himself with the pretense of having some laundry to take care of.

"Okay..." Itachi sighed heavily and dropped his chopsticks. "What did I do now?"

"You know _exactly_ what you did," I hissed in irritation. How he could act like this was beyond me.

"I do?" He genuinely looked bemused and I have to admit that a small part of me wondered if last night had been a dream. Did he really think not telling me about Naruto was no big deal? I frowned and decided to test him out again.

"Never mind," I grunted and tapped my fingertips on the table, and keeping my voice even I asked as nonchalantly as I could. "Have you still heard no word from Jiraiya?"

There was a flicker of something within his eyes that I would have missed if I hadn't been studying him carefully.

_(ah ha! Lie...lie now. I dare you to!)_

"Actually..." He paused and took a deep breath. "Yes."

My heart skipped a beat. I had really expected him to deny it, but this blunt honest answer had me stumped and slightly gasping for breath.

He gave a small smile and cupped his chin; his gaze not giving anything away as he continued quietly. "Danzo has recruited him already."

_(ba-dump ba-dump ba-dump ba-dump)_

_(can't...fucking...breathe)_

"It was much faster than anyone expected, but Jiraiya planned for Naruto to gain a reputation on the streets of Kyoto. Under Jiraiya's orders, he was to begin eliminating members of the Bakufu Syndicate while allying himself with the Mibu Syndicate. As you already know, Danzo's more than ready to work with the Mibu to take down Ikegami, hence when word of Naruto's prowess reached him...he was naturally intrigued. Danzo was so impressed by what he saw...he's already taken Naruto into his fold."

_(so you've finally done it, Naruto. You've finally taken the first step to your revenge. Should I be happy for you or worried that you are now about to enter a world where I can never reach you?)_

"Danzo didn't question anything about his past?" I asked when I felt I could speak without my voice giving away how shaken I felt inside.

"If he did, I don't know. I'm only giving you the information Shikamaru related to Temari. So far...so good, eh?"

I swallowed tightly and squeezed my eyes shut to gather myself for a second before opening them again to burst out in frustration and anger. "So why are you telling me this now?! Why did you keep this from me all this time if you knew about the situation?!"

"I only heard of it last week," he confessed with an apologetic smile. "I didn't think you'd want to concern yourself too much about Naruto especially when you're up to your neck with training and -"

"Geez, _nii-san_," I interrupted sarcastically. "I've only asked you about him every other goddamn day."

"Yes...oddly enough, and I wonder why."

"Wha...what?" Great. I just had to sound that breathless and 'caught', didn't I? His small but knowing smile wasn't helping much either.

"How do you _really_ feel about Naruto now, Sasuke?" came the quiet but blunt question that just about took the wind out of my sails. I stumbled around for a decent rebuttal, to tell him to mind his own business, and yet the sudden image of he and Shisui looking so comfortable and happy in their own world last night, had me biting my lip in envy. I lowered my lashes and shrugged lightly.

"We...we are close," I finally admitted through lips that felt heavy. My heart thudded loudly in my chest, so much so, I was sure he could hear it, or even worse actually 'see' just how close Naruto and I had become in that final night before his departure. But that was silly. I didn't believe the Uchiha were given the gift of being able to see the past...probably the future.

"How close?"

"Close enough that it's none of your damn business," I clipped tightly. "At least you have Shisui with you, and what do I have?"

I hadn't meant to say that. I really didn't. It made me sound petty and jealous; small and childish in the face of an insurmountable and overwhelming wall of 'aloneness' I was not used to. It wasn't the loneliness of not having a family, and that was something I had adjusted to over the years, but this was..._different_, and maybe Itachi was right after all. Perhaps it would have been best if I hadn't overheard the conversation last night or asked about Naruto in the first place. It was clear he wasn't too concerned about me or Itachi would have at least mentioned it. Or did Temari just forget?

_(or she doesn't know either...after all she's getting her information from Shikamaru)_

"I know it's hard right now," came the soft-spoken words as he reached out to clasp my hand gently. He squeezed it a little. "But just try to remember that he's doing what needs to be done to get back to _you_...right? I'm sure in his own way and time he'll contact you eventually. I've already given Temari our private phone number so..."

"...how long must I wait?" I asked as my heart sunk. "We'll be heading out soon and -"

"Be optimistic for once, eh?" He poked my forehead playfully, which earned him a pout as I rubbed the area that throbbed slightly. "If he loves you as much as you love him, he won't give up on you that easily."

I sputtered and tried to deny the whole "love" thing, but Itachi was already rising to his feet.

"Now eat up, my dear pessimistic little brother. We've got a full day ahead."

And with an embarrassing kiss on the top of my head, I was left to wallow in the afterglow of being babied by an older brother who was still trying to make up for lost time. For goodness sake, I was no longer a fucking kid!

So why the hell couldn't I stop blushing up a storm or smiling a little? Although that was soon wiped away as I finally noticed Haku had reappeared and was standing by the door to the kitchen with a pensive expression on his visage.

"What's wrong?" I queried, although a part of me could probably already guess what the problem could be.

"I...I didn't mean to eavesdrop," he gushed out quickly as if afraid his thoughts would ramble on without him. "But...but I couldn't help overhearing what Itachi-sama said about Naruto-kun."

Ah, of course.

_(you're still in love with him, aren't you?)_

"Well...you heard what he said, didn't you?" I asked with a wan smile. "Naruto's doing quite well without us having to worry about him."

Haku nodded slowly, though his gaze was still downcast. "Do you...do you think he's forgotten about us already?"

_(no...he couldn't have...he's not allowed to...he swore he'd never forget)_

"I don't think so," I replied aloud. "It's not been that long since he left us, so how could he forget already? Look, why don't we focus on the battle ahead and if we're lucky to get done before Naruto's finished with his...then we can search for him and help out if he needs us to."

That seemed to perk him up considerably as he finally lifted his head with a tremulous smile on his features. "You really think so, Sasuke-sama? Can we really assist Naruto-kun if he wants us to?"

"I don't see why not." I shrugged as if it was no big deal. However, I could hear warning bells going off at the back of my head at what kind of a bogus promise I was making. There was no damn guarantee it was going to happen. For all I knew, neither of us would make it out of this battle alive. Who was I to give him such false hope?

"All right!" Haku seemed to pump himself up with a loud war cry and a loud clap of his hands. "I've got to work extra hard today during training then. Sasori-sama and Tenten-san are joining me for practice. Sasori-sama says he wants to be as good as we are." He laughed at that as if unable to believe the older man would want to take lessons from him.

"Haku..."

"Yes, Sasuke-sama?"

I studied him carefully. Ever since his return, we've haven't exactly brought up the topic of his fiasco with Sai, and I have yet to really gauge how he feels about the whole incident. Watching his interaction with the other members of the organization has been great especially his unlikely (or maybe not) camaraderie with Sasori. Together, they looked way too young to be such seasoned warriors, and yet all you had to do was listen in to their conversations to realize they were wise beyond their years.

"Are you...how are you doing?" I asked quietly.

He opened his mouth to give a generic answer, but seemed to realize _exactly_ what I was asking for he lowered his head again and gave a barely audible sigh. "I still have nightmares once in a while," he confessed. "And it's sometimes hard to believe that whole thing happened, but...but I can't dwell too much on that anymore. Sai isn't the first person I've killed, and he won't be the last."

He punctuated that cold matter-of-fact statement with a final scoop of rice in the bowl before placing it before me.

"You know what I really think, Sasuke-sama?"

"What?"

"I look at everyone in the group...see how well we all work together and I tell myself that I shouldn't get too attached because someday...very soon, some of them, I might never see again." He bit his lower lip, a thin film of tears hovering in the corners of his eyes. "With everyday we practice and go over routines and I watch you, Shisui-sama and Itachi-sama discuss battle plans, it hits me just how serious this really is. I thought what we had faced after Gudan was terrible, but I fear this might be worse than that. I almost don't want to make any more friends because saying goodbye hurts too much."

He paused, seemed to shake himself a little as if suddenly aware of where he was, before wiping his eyes with the sleeve of his shirt. He bowed in apology and gave me a sheepish smile.

"I am sorry for speaking like this to you, Sasuke-sama. You would not approve of my moment of weakness and it is unlike a soldier to become this sentimental before a battle. You've told me that many times before."

"But unlike before, we are fighting for something even bigger than ourselves," I said softly. "We're no longer fighting for someone we do not care about, Haku. This time around, we are fighting for all those who have lost their lives for no damn good reason at all; the innocent families ripped from their roots, the lives destroyed in the hands of a maniacal bastard, and the restoration of a tradition that was meant to bring peace and stability to a country. This time, Haku, when we march back into Byaku-Shinkyou, it's to take back what's rightfully ours. We might not all make it out alive, but at least we know we went in there for a purpose and that we shed our blood for a worthy cause."

I reached out to squeeze his hand gently.

"So what do you say? Let's try to rewrite history, eh, Haku?"

He needn't have said another word for the expression in his eyes; respect, love, admiration and determination were more than enough for me. He reversed our positions by now clutching my hand and raising it to his lips to give it a reverent kiss.

"I renew my vows to fight by your side, Sasuke-sama, and to obey Naruto-kun's plea as well."

"...Naruto's...plea?"

"I keep thinking it was a dream," he admitted shyly. "but I believe it was probably when Naruto-kun came to see me while I was at the clinic to say his goodbyes."

And as he cradled my hand to his cheek and closed his eyes, his final message from Naruto – something I had secretly craved and longed to hear for so long – would finally cement that four-letter word I had tried to foolishly avoid and ignore.

* * *

><p>In the subtle waves between objective reality and the subjective sub conscious, Haku could feel the slight pressure of the warm forehead against his, and the soothing breath that bathed his clammy flesh while strong hands squeezed his gently.<p>

"I'm selfish," came the whispered words that were thick with unshed tears. "I know what I'm about to ask you is selfish as hell considering how you feel about me, but...please...please do me this one favor, Haku...I beg you. Take care of him for me, okay? I don't...I don't know if I'm going to make it out alive on my end, so please...even if I'm not there and never return...be with him until your last breath. Let this be the final wish you ever carry out for me, my dear friend."

_(for both of you will always be in my heart for as long as I live...)_


	37. 37: A Man of Many Faces

**Notes:** Shocking! A quick update again! :D My sincere thanks to all ye lovely folks who have left comments on the last chapter; shows me that you're still sticking around for the joyride, eh? I really do appreciate it! Here's hoping you enjoy this one! Onward and upward, dear Readers!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 37<strong>

**A Man of Many Faces**

Like Michinoku prints

Of the tangled leaves of ferns,

It is because of you

That I have become confused;

But my love for you remains.

**Minamoto no Toru**

* * *

><p><em>Teradaya Inn,<em>

_Fushimi-ku, Kyoto_

It was almost always the same setting in most of these places. The main floor of the inn gave the illusion of being an honestly run business, with customers hunched over steaming bowls of _udon_ or nursing the umpteenth cup of _sake_ as they spilled their tired woes to anyone who gave a shit. Young girls – fresh teens with perky bosoms that teased within pastel kimonos – served in quiet obedience; taking orders from uncouth bastards who would squeeze a breast or swat a firm ass in salutation while cackling with mirth at their daring. The girls – already well trained in dealing with such behavior – would only titter with amusement and shuffle just as quickly back to a kitchen where its jaded owner would bark orders to young men sweating it out over bubbling cauldrons of the next meal to be served.

If it was a particularly good night, you might be lucky to catch a roaming songstress performing on 'stage' in a corner of the room; her _shamisen_ droning songs of love lost and broken hearts. On wooden benches outside, old men were likely to be seen playing o_icho-kabu_; toothy grins and smiles revealed as they cackled at the passing youth and regaled no one in particular with tales of their exploits back in their glory days. They barely looked up when a passing Watchdog would stop by for a 'check in', since these were mainly curious new officers eager to make a bust but failing to see anything worth arresting (except for the occasional drunk).

If these officers were more diligent or thorough, perhaps they would have wondered why there were two doors with the signs "For Staff Only" close to the restrooms and kitchen at the back of the main dining hall. If they had remained an hour longer, perhaps they would have noted the steady stream of men disappearing through said doors. If they really cared about their jobs, perhaps they would have noticed that beyond said doors and through a corridor illuminated by a lone weak light bulb, were a short flight of stairs leading to an underground den where so many arrests would have been made to guarantee them some kind of recognition from the higher authorities for a job well done.

The first thing to hit you as you arrived was the billowing clouds of smoke – a combination of the finest cigars, the most expensive of cigarettes, or the sweetness of processed opium and crushed marijuana – to assail the senses. _Sake_, imported beer and wines flowed like the prohibition gone awry. In a room as large as the main restaurant above, about twenty to thirty men – some in suits, some in _yukata_ of all shapes, sizes, and tattoo markings - sat in a rough circle upon _tatami_ mats, their voices rising as each tried to out yell the other over the haze of alcohol and drugs in a raucous game of _Chō-han_. Wagers were placed and wads of cash thrown into the circle as the dealer shook the bamboo cup before turning it upside down. Breaths were held for the most minuscule of minutes and when it was finally overturned, several groans (or cries of victory) echoed around the room in a collective wave. Winners grabbed their loot with greedy laughter; losers bemoaned their losses, and yet went in for the next round eager to make up for previous failings.

_(addiction was a terrible thing) _

Young women, slightly older than their counterparts above – dressed in knee-high kimonos that exposed creamy legs and enhanced cleavages to whoever cared to grope as they passed – served and entertained their boisterous guests as best they could. If they were lucky, they could attract the roaming eye of a _kyodai_, who was all too willing to have a quick fuck session in the darker corner of the room. They would shamelessly slide onto the laps of these powerful men, grinding hips and thrusting perky nipples into the hungry mouths eager to suckle them dry; their wanton cries or moans of lust mingling with the primal roars of male conquest.

Shikamaru watched all this dispassionately; his appetite for the scene at an all time low. Once you had been in one of such places...you had just about seen them all, and in the past few months, he had been in more than enough of such hell pits to last him a lifetime. With an inward sigh, he lit a cigarette and threw back his head; allowing the familiar rush to fill his lungs as he leaned against the wall. Beneath hooded lashes – giving one the illusion of being half asleep – he allowed his gaze to travel across the room to the two men engaged in deep conversation within the haze of smoke. He allowed a rueful smile to come to his features as he took note of the body language of the younger; how that lithe figure beneath the black _yukata_ seemed to ooze a sensuality he was unaware of doing. With those familiar blond locks now at shoulder length (having long given up the idea of getting haircut after haircut), and those blue eyes more prominent and piercing thanks to the thin layer of kohl he applied each morning, it was hard to ignore Uzumaki Naruto's presence in any setting even though he had tried to 'sneak' in earlier in the evening without being noticed. His companion was obviously enamored with the blond, for he seemed to lean closer as if eager to inhale every word that was uttered from Naruto's mouth, though it could also be because the damn room was so loud and no one could hear himself think otherwise. Either way, if Naruto was aware of the older man's interests, he gave no sign of it. He settled for nursing his cup of _sake_ and trying to ignore the flirtations of the young women (about four of them) flanking their sides like desperate nymphomaniacs eager to have a piece of the Golden Beast beside them.

Who was this man? Only the _shateigashira_ (second lieutenant) of the Bakufu Syndicate.

It was amazing, in itself, that Naruto had finally managed to wiggle his way into getting this meeting with one of the high-ranking members of the Syndicate in the first place. Shikamaru chuckled beneath his breath at the irony of it all. To think that Naruto had been able to pull off something this impossible so quickly was a testament to how smart and determined the blond really was. Shikamaru had to reluctantly admire that, despite the small part of him that had always considered and assumed that Naruto would remain clueless and helpless for the rest of his life. However, Naruto had proven him wrong time and time again, and it had all started on that night after his introduction to Jiraiya's comrades at the dinner hosted on their behalf. Naruto's chilling words still resonated with him; words that had been filled with bitterness and a deep-seeded sadness no words of comfort could ever appease.

"Did you see their eyes?" Naruto had asked long after the festivities were over and they were back in his room. "Did you see the way they looked at me?"

Shikamaru, who was slightly intoxicated by the amount of liquor served all night, could barely lift his head off the pillow as he mumbled out some sort of response. He could see Naruto's bare back to him, the hard muscles and faint scars from the bruises and floggings he had sustained over time like a map of his life etched within the slightly bronzed flesh.

"Like I was...a piece of meat," Naruto continued in that same 'dead' tone. "Like I was just something they could manipulate however they wanted. All their praises...adoration was _empty_, Shika. It felt like rehearsed lines and they thought I'd feed into it."

"Or maybe they really do like you -"

"Fuck that," came the curt interruption. "Don't you see? This is what they did to my father too! Maybe he really didn't want to become _yakuza_ or an assassin in the first place, but there were no options left for him to slip out of. Hell, even the pervert must have seen that! I'll bet he had the ability to stop my father from being a part of all that, but his selfishness got in the way!"

Shikamaru did lift his head at that; looking up to notice the fire within those eyes that seemed to scorch right through him. Yikes. Naruto really did look pissed off.

"Am I missing something here?" Shikamaru asked warily. "I thought you said the reason your father joined was because he had to save some guy -"

"Jiraiya gave him an ultimatum," Naruto growled. "Join the organization or watch his 'father' get destroyed by the _yakuza_. What option did he have?"

"...so? What are you saying?"

Naruto threw up his hands and then fell to his stomach to lie beside Shikamaru. He looked toward the closed screen door as if waiting for something or straining his ears to listen to something before whispering beneath his breath.

"I'm saying that I think Jiraiya's not being straight with me," he confessed. "I mean...I know he's done all these good things for us, but I can't help wondering if he's really being honest. What if he's only using me to get back to the top?"

"He retired, Naruto. Doesn't that say anything about the guy? I don't think he wants to get back into this business -"

"But you saw the way he acted tonight, didn't you? Now that he realizes that Ikegami and Danzo could be out of the picture and that I'm asking him to take over when it's all over...maybe the idea of being in power again is intoxicating to the senses. Maybe he's remembering how good it all was back then and the whole fucking circle repeats itself again. How many more innocent men have to be taken into the organization against their will?"

"Naruto...the _yakuza_ will always exist even when this war is over. You're forgetting that the Bakufu aren't the only factions out there. Besides the Mibu, there are other families that want the power. Just what the fuck do you plan to do? Destroy them all?"

Naruto groaned and flopped his head upon the futon. He formed a fist and pounded it into the mat beside him in frustration. "I hate this. I fucking hate this."

Shikamaru lifted a hand to rub his friend's shoulders in sympathy, but was thwarted as Naruto raised his head again; that same fiery passion still in his eyes.

"But I am going to do something about it all the same." He looked at his friend. "They can't get away with it so easily, Shika. We've got to teach them a lesson in some way...to let them know that they can't keep fucking around with peoples' lives like it's a chess game."

_Ah, shit. This can't be good,_ Shikamaru thought with growing worry. When Naruto got this determined with some hare-brained idea...there really was no stopping him. "And just what are you going to do, Mr. Uzumaki?"

There was a long silence as the blond rested his chin on the pillow to stare into the flickering flame within the lantern before them. Finally, he replied quietly. "To be honest...I'm not sure, but I'm not going to stop trying. My father died with that ideology in mind. There are no rules that said I can't try in his place...even if it kills me in the end."

"...just don't do anything too stupid," Shikamaru whispered as he turned away and pretended to yawn in weariness, though he was now far from feeling sleepy.

"Well...I've got you there to take care of me in case, eh?" came the quiet response that was followed by a weak chuckle. Shikamaru wanted to bark that he wasn't going to remain Naruto's babysitter for the rest of his life, but to his chagrin, a light snore signaled that the blond was already fast asleep.

_(you selfish son-of-bitch. I swear you make me want to throttle you and yet...)_

And yet all these months later, Naruto had just about proven him wrong in every way imaginable. He crushed out the cigarette and absently brushed away the woman who had sidled up to him while he was lost in his thoughts.

(_I can't help wanting to see just how far you'll go. I want to get to the end with you for some dumb ass reason or maybe it's just Asuma driving me to stick around for the ride)_

He dug into his _yukata_ for the pack of cigarettes, while musing over how the wheels for Naruto's revenge had begun to spin almost immediately after that night. Jiraiya had outlined the plan the next day; a way for Naruto to get noticed by Danzo and his goons easily. With the help of the Mibu Syndicate, Naruto was to assimilate into the faction but without getting a tattoo to signify which group he belonged to...yet. With a small group of seven men specifically chosen by the _oyabun_ of the Mibu, and with Naruto at the helm, they began to infiltrate the Bakufu turf in the Nishikyo region, taking over small time racketeers and businesses. For those stupid enough to challenge them, their deaths were swift and made as a lesson to anyone else that dared to step forward. However, the brilliance of all this was that Naruto was not blatantly obvious in his dealings with the enemies. He let his goons do the 'talking' for him, only allowing his name to be spread around as the one behind the destruction. In about three weeks, Nishikyo belonged to them (or rather the Mibu). In less than a month, the Minami, Yamishina, Shimogyo, and Fushimi regions were easily within the grasp of this small band of skilled fighters. Shocking to admit, but the southern part of Kyoto was rapidly being controlled by the Mibu, and it wasn't long until the Bakufu as well as a certain Shimura Danzo began to take notice.

Watching Naruto in a leadership role was actually interesting to say the least. For all his goofiness and sometimes lack of attention to detail (and short attention-span), Shikamaru was pleasantly surprised at how easy Naruto made it seem. He didn't set about demanding the others do whatever he asked of them, and considering these 'Magnificent Seven' were seasoned fighters themselves and had many years of being _yakuza_ under their belts, one would have expected some kind of resistance from the beginning. Perhaps, like Shikamaru, they too were waiting for the 'Blond Wonder' to make a mistake, for him to falter and realize he was dealing with matters bigger than himself. So far, Naruto was giving them reasons to second guess their doubts. He sought their advice and counsel in as much as he made it clear that he was technically still in charge. He didn't impose himself unnecessarily, and was still somewhat naively eager to point out the good in them rather than focus on the 'terrible' jobs they had to do on a daily basis. If a mission was carried out successfully, Naruto was not averse to commending them for a job well done either by praising them exuberantly or taking them out for a night of _sake_ and good women. If the 'Magnificent Seven' noticed that their boss did not readily welcome said women to his side during such soirees, they kept it to themselves. If they noticed that there were times when their boss would fall into thoughtful silence or grit his teeth in silent fury, they were wise not to bother him then.

Bottom line, the Magnificent Seven had come to respect their new boss just as much as he entrusted his safety and ideals to them. It was an odd partnership that worked contrary to everything that should have suggested otherwise.

In the gloom, he watched as the _shateigashira_ (who was actually Simizutani Satoshi) made an overt move by leaning close enough to whisper something into Naruto's ear, while reaching out to caress the necklace draped around the blond's neck. Naruto did not flinch or push the older man away, but he gave no inclination of accepting whatever physical advance was made. This was a game to be played after all. If Naruto was to woo the lieutenant's trust, he'd have to play ball...even if it meant having to sleep with the enemy.

Literally.

_Wonder what Sasuke would think of that,_ came the errant thought that had Shika's lips twitching faintly in amusement.

He wasn't stupid or blind. He had seen and noticed the change in both men's relationship with each other during the latter stages of their stay at Buk-gu. The fact they had locked themselves away in Naruto's apartment was more than enough to let anyone know they were now a whole lot more than just 'friends'. To be blunt, Shikamaru couldn't say he approved of it, as a part of him was still unforgiving of the Sasuke he had known during his incarceration. That part of him felt that Naruto deserved better, but he would have been obtuse not to notice that Sasuke was doing his best to reverse his past mistakes. He might not have become all warm and fuzzy in the social interaction department, but the ex-captain was doing the best he could, and if it meant being in a sexual relationship with another man (maybe hanging around Orochimaru for so long had made him comfortable with such a thing in the first place), who was he to argue? What was more surprising in all this was Naruto's willingness to accept such a relationship in the first place. For a guy who had been through that _hell _while in the dungeons and who wouldn't even welcome the idea of another man touching him for several weeks on end, allowing Sasuke into his life was a humongous step for him as well.

_(the most unlikely of bed fellows...wonders shall never cease)_

Still he did know that Sasuke meant a lot to Naruto as obvious with the way the blond would soak up any information he could gather from Temari about how far the Uchiha brothers were coming along with their plans to storm into Byaku-Shinkyou. He would watch the wistful expression come into those blue eyes or the small smile he'd give if something good was reported. It was hard for both of them, but at least he had been able to visit Temari for a weekend of some 'alone' time about a month ago. Unfortunately, Naruto had been too busy weaving his spell with Danzo (and now the Bakufu dogs) to even consider taking a break. Not that it would be easy getting to see Sasuke anyway. If they were to indeed meet...

He sat up as he noticed the blink-and-you-just-might-miss-it look flashed his way.

_(gotcha boss)_

He crushed out his second cigarette and rose to his feet, stretching out unused muscles from sitting for so long. No one paid much attention to him as he slipped out of the room, but he had been doing his homework and Naruto would want to know as much as possible from the information he had gathered so far.

He made his way around the building, stopping only to make sure there were no Watchdogs or Bakufu troublemakers in the vicinity. He nodded absently at two of the Magnificent Seven lurking in the shadows; always on the alert in case of a skirmish, but so far it had been a quiet night, which was a good thing. Shikamaru kept his gaze lowered as he walked past buildings that showcased women in heat, he bypassed the drunkards and the homeless in need of a quick fix, stepped over standing puddles in cluttered and smelly alleys, and several in and out of hidden corners later, arrived at the abandoned warehouse where he had parked the black sports car.

Though he would have preferred not to drive around in a _yukata_, beggars couldn't be choosers. He slid behind the wheel and sighed in relief. His neck and back muscles throbbed from the awkward position he had been in all evening, and as he stretched again to get the blood flowing, the sudden sound of the passenger door opening had him sitting up and placing a hand at his waist (the gun had been hidden there all this time) in readiness for an attack. However, with a breathless grunt, the very man he thought he would have to wait for some time slid into the seat and slammed the door shut behind him.

"Drive," came the curt command that Shikamaru obeyed without question.

Ten minutes in and when it seemed like Naruto wasn't going to say another word, Shikamaru stole a glance to see if the blond was asleep. Naruto's gaze was trained outside the window, a hand thrust within the top of his _yukata_ as if caressing his chest absently. Shikamaru couldn't tell from the other man's expression what he was thinking, so he cleared his throat and tried to ask as nonchalantly as possible.

"Well?"

Naruto blinked hard as if waking up from a stupor to eye his friend; a wry smile tugging at his lips. "You mean besides him wanting to fuck my brains out?" He gave a short bark of a laugh before allowing his lips to curl in disdain. "Just as I expected actually. He's willing to work with me...a sixty-forty partnership."

Shikamaru whistled in appreciation. "Nice."

"That after haggling with him for a while," Naruto continued in that same cynical tone. "He at first wanted an eighty-twenty seeing as I didn't have a lot of options to offer him, but when I guaranteed him I could get Ukyo, Kita and Sakyo within the month...he couldn't resist."

Shikamaru smirked. "Ah, offering him something you took in the first place, eh?"

"He doesn't know I'm the one behind it," Naruto agreed with a grin that looked nothing short of feral on his features. "To them, Uzumaki Naruto is just a figment of their overactive imagination; a terror out to destroy everything they hold dear. My goal now is to get him in my favor and be introduced to Miyazaki Manabu -"

"The first lieutenant?"

"That's right. Once he's in the picture, I can begin to sweeten the deal by promising them turf and businesses Danzo has claimed thanks to his dealings with the very Mibu Syndicate on my side."

"Tangled little web there, Naruto."

"I know...and it's all so delicious, isn't it?"

They glanced at each other and burst into helpless giggles at how ridiculous yet dangerous it all seemed. And yet Shikamaru couldn't help the tingle of adrenaline that shot down his spine at just how powerful Naruto was becoming without actually knowing it. He really did have these powerful men groveling at his feet, and except for the missions he was beginning to get from Danzo, everything just might be moving too smoothly.

"What did you manage to learn tonight about my target?" Naruto asked eventually. "The dossier Danzo sent wasn't as comprehensive as I'd like."

With a nod, Shikamaru conveyed all he had gathered from talking to some of the men in the gambling hall. Most had dealt with the councilman who apparently took about half of the Inn's illegal earnings on a weekly basis. His ties with the Bakufu extended into the booze and sex trade business, going as far as indulging himself and his friends with parties featuring terrified teenage Thai or Vietnamese girls for hire. Bottom line, Ishida was a fat, greedy bastard who only cared for himself and had apparently fallen out of favor with Danzo and his schemes to take over the Democratic party. He was simply no longer needed.

"So less guilt in taking him out," Naruto muttered beneath his breath as he cracked his knuckles.

"If you say so," Shikamaru replied as he drove down the brightly lit streets. "...he does have a wife and two kids though..."

"So?"

Shikamaru bit his lower lip and nodded in silent understanding. "So tomorrow then?"

"Right," Naruto muttered and snuggled closer to the window with his lashes drifting closed. "After his dinner party...he'd have eaten his last meal on this earth."

* * *

><p><em>Naruto:<em>

It's not that I don't care.

It's just that I cannot allow myself to think of those things or I'd go insane. I thought Shika, of all people, would have understood that. The worst thing that could possibly happen is to have second doubts especially since this is my unofficial first assassination mission and screwing it up was not an option. It's a good thing I was given someone I could really hate without even trying. Just reading the dossier and hearing Shikamaru's accounts were enough to get my adrenaline roaring to take him out.

_(just one less asshole to worry about)_

The big ones would be next. I was just training for that opportunity, that's all.

I straightened out the necktie and eyed my reflection in the mirror, almost finding it ridiculous that I'd have to get all 'dressed-up' just to take out someone. Considering I'd be lying on a fucking roof for most of the night and getting my ass cold in the process, this was a goddamn waste of time. But hey, this was what 'the boss' wanted, and I'd have to play the game...for now.

"Looking good," I whispered at the wig-wearing dark-haired stranger before me in the expensive designer suit and crisp white silk shirt beneath. I adjusted the gold cuff links with the insignia of Danzo's little faction – a 'gift' from the boss for my decision to join his organization. Hell, I could almost laugh at how our meeting had finally taken place, but the stranger in the mirror couldn't get himself to do so. The grimace on his features was enough to remind him of the bitter aftertaste the conversation had left him with, and as he spun around to double-check his briefcase with its false bottom containing all the weapons he'd need tonight, he allowed his thoughts to drift back to that fateful afternoon.

* * *

><p>"He wants to see you."<p>

My #6 man (_Roku_) of the group I have nicknamed "The Magnificent Seven" sat before me and slipped the folded note next to my bowl of ramen. I slurped hungrily and eyed it with a raised brow before looking up to meet the amused dark eyes. Roku reminded me of a squirrel for some reason; maybe it was because of his small stature or that he was quick as hell, but I liked him best out of the others due to his sharp wit. Besides, he was the one who introduced me to this fantastic restaurant that serves the best ramen this side of Japan, so he gets major props from yours truly.

"He wants me?" I repeated as I belched and then picked up the note. There was nothing on the outside to give anything away except for little inscription in the corner that simply said '_kage'_.

"His minion dropped the note off," Roku explained with a flash of his teeth. "Said that his boss would like an answer as soon as possible."

"Is the minion still here?"

"No...but I'm guessing all the information you need is going to be in there," Roku said with a tip of his head to the side as if appraising me.

I grunted and tore it open, eyes scanning the neatly written words, and though I gave the impression that I didn't give a shit about its significance, my heart was currently doing the waltz as Jiraiya's prediction had finally come true. It might have taken three months to get the job done, but here it was at last. A chance to meet Shimura Danzo face-to-face after all this time. I knew it would take all of my acting skills not to choke him to death the moment I saw him (shooting him right off the bat would be too damn easy because I wanted the fucker to suffer), I knew I'd have to bide my time.

The instructions in the note were clear and direct. I was to meet Danzo at an abandoned construction site on the outskirts of the city..._alone_. Which was fine with me...just as long as Shikamaru and #2 (_Ni_) were waiting and watching the meeting from an undisclosed but safe location a couple of miles away. The roles were simple. In the case of an 'incident', they were to take down my enemies quickly. You'd be surprised at how well Shika can sharp shoot from a distance, though he's not quite as good as me or #2.

Anyway, I wasn't sure if I showed up late because on arrival, there were already two black Sedans parked and waiting for me to appear. Two burly men in dark suits and sunglasses were positioned beside one of the cars and even before I could blurt out a "hello", I was frisked and patted down (and I swear one of them even groped me...pervert) before I was considered 'clear'. The driver of the second Sedan stepped out of the car, made his way around and opened the door of the back seat to introduce the man I had been waiting for (all my life). Sure I had seen him during Gudan, but he had been too far away, and besides, I hadn't really known his back story at the time. But now...up close and personal, I could feel my insides (stomach) beginning to churn with an emotion that felt blacker and darker than I'd ever experienced.

My jaw felt like it was about to break off from the smile I was forcing myself to maintain even as my hands formed tight(er) fists within the pockets of my jacket as he finally stepped out of the car and into the mid-morning light.

_(...not impressive)_

He was slightly shorter than me, his body bent slightly from age as he leaned on an ornate-looking walking stick. There was an black silk patch over his right eye while the other revealed a heavily-lidded dark one that was still sharp and piercing in its intensity. There was a perpetual downward curl of his lips as if the very action of smiling was foreign to him. In addition to the wrinkles of age on his features, there was also an interesting scar on his jaw...as if someone had carved an X into the flesh. I had to admit it made him look more sinister and bad ass, but this was no time to admire his physical appearance. As for the rest of him, his attire was of traditional wear, but instead of the casual _yukata_, he was in full dress mode: _kamishimo_ and _hakama_ pants of the finest material with leather sandals on his feet. Though the sleeves of the _kamishimo_ hid most of his arms, it still wasn't difficult to tell that he favored his right; a reminder that Itachi had shot the guy back during the ambush and this was probably the result from it.

"Uncanny..."

"Hmm?" I pretended to act dumb at the muttered words; putting on the face of the innocent as best I could. "What's that again?"

"Nothing," he replied with a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. "It's just that you remind me of someone I knew a long time ago. But he is of no importance at this time. You and I, it seems, have a lot to talk about."

_Not of importance? My father was not of importance, eh? We'll see about that, you bastard._

"Do we?" I said out loud. "I can't imagine what you'd have to see me about...sir."

"I do believe we've met before...some time ago at a place called Byaku-Shinkyou."

I shook my head after pretending to think for a minute. "Nope. Sorry...can't really recall your face. You sure it was me?"

"Unlike you, I never forget a face," Danzo replied with his shit-eating smirk widening. "You made quite an impression on me Uzumaki Naruto and now...it seems you're making quite the impression on our dear friends in the Underworld."

I smirked right back. "So are you gonna arrest me or what?"

He threw back his head and laughed – not that I was sure of what the hell was so funny. "Hardly the case, my boy. I've actually been searching for you for quite a while."

"Oh yeah?"

"Indeed. When I learned you had not perished in the ambush, my top priority was to see that you were safe."

"How kind of you."

"Of course seeking your safety comes at my selfish need for your services."

"Hmph, and if I said I wasn't interested?"

Danzo's smile grew hard. "Then I wouldn't have given you much of a choice. You would not have been able to step a foot anywhere in this country without being arrested on the spot. I can make it happen, you know."

My jaw worked though I kept the light smirk in place. This guy really was a piece of work.

"I see," I finally muttered with a nod of understanding. "Guess I would have had no choice then, eh?"

"None whatsoever."

I shrugged and scratched the back of my head. "Okay...so...what exactly do you want from me?"

"What do you think I want from you, Uzumaki Naruto?"

"How the hell should I know?" I was genuinely irritated now at his evasiveness. "You're the one who called me out here. If I had known we'd be doing the guessing game, I would have stayed home."

"Your little faction has been making a name for itself around Kyoto," he said with a tap of his walking stick on the ground as if to shut me up. "If I'm not mistaken, you've managed to silence most of the Bakufu Syndicate in the southern regions...with some help from the Mibu Syndicate, correct?"

I shrugged again and pretended to be bored with the topic. "Yeah, so?"

"It's fascinating how you are able to accomplish so much in so little time." I could all but see him drooling at this point; his eye flashing with greedy intent as he parted his lips to reveal white but slightly crooked teeth. "It lets me know that you're a man capable of getting the job done quickly. I admire that. I, too, am a man who wastes no time getting what he wants."

"And what is it that you want?" I queried with a raised brow.

"The same thing you do, my boy." He grinned now and I couldn't resist the involuntary shudder that wracked through me at the sight. "Power. A little at a time we begin to erase the very existence of the Bakufu Syndicate and those who align themselves with such a corrosive group. Once they were regarded as the stronghold of Japanese ideologies, now, they are nothing more than figureheads tarnishing our reputation."

"Is that right...?" I eyed him warily.

"With my position as a high-ranking member of the DIET and with favor in the Ministry of the Defense, I have the power to eradicate entire factions if I choose to. However, it seems I am being blocked from achieving this by some members of the opposing party in the DIET."

He paced away from me, and I noticed the slight limp with every step he took. The overwhelming urge to reach out and kick him to the ground was so strong; I literally had to take a step back to control myself.

"Japan needs strong governing heads, Uzumaki Naruto, and for years I've had to sit back and watch it go to the dogs...incompetent leaders who have allowed everything to go to ruins. This is not the Japan our forefathers dreamt of, is it? We were quite happy being Isolationists until the blasted foreigners came in to ruin things! That is the Japan I want to return to! A nation able to stand on its own and defend itself against the evils and strangleholds of Western Civilization!"

He turned back to me and the fevered passion on his visage was enough to have me shuddering again. I realized now that I was dealing with a goddamn lunatic. This man didn't need to be killed, maybe beaten to a pulp before chucked into the loony bin for psychiatric evaluation. It was just a damn shame my father (and so many others) had to be all a part of his crazy plans for world (or at least Japan's) domination.

"This is where you come in," he was saying as he walked closer to me. "This is where I need your youth, vigor, and smarts, Naruto. With you by my side, we will be unstoppable. All I need is your pledge of allegiance to my cause and together, we will make Japan as great as it used to be."

I studied his slightly flushed features for a long minute before finding the voice to reply. "You really think I can be of some help to you?"

"Of course! Why else would I approach you if I didn't have the utmost faith in your capabilities?" He reached out to squeeze my shoulder with his good hand. "You have a certain aura around you, young man. An aura that tells me you are a man of strong convictions. Perhaps a dinner with me, where I can explain a little more about my plans, will make my intentions truly clear. What say you? Would you like to share _sake_ with me sometime?"

I grinned. "I'm game to that. Just mention the time and place and I'm there. I've got to confess that you've got me intrigued, Shimura-san."

"Good. Being intrigued is a start. I hope in due time you'll come to share my ideals and goals for what this nation could become. Now then...if you'll excuse me, I must take my leave. I have quite a few important meetings to attend to."

"Hey, don't let me stop you from doing whatever," I replied with my hands up as if surrendering. He chuckled at that and began to make his way back to his car. However, he stopped as the door was being opened for him and turned around to appraise me darkly for a disturbingly long minute.

"I've always been curious about something, Uzumaki Naruto."

"What's that?"

"How did you manage to survive the fire at the failure that was Gudan?"

_(how did I survive indeed)_

I smirked lightly. "Let's just say it was a miracle."

He was silent for another minute, his gaze not giving anything away until he nodded as if coming to terms with my answer. "Indeed it was."

"I'm curious too," I blurted out before I could stop myself. This time, it was his turn to look at me quizzically. "Whatever happened to that guy...what's his name now...eh...Sasuke or something like that? I know we were both in there, but I couldn't remember anything after I passed out."

Danzo raised a brow. "You have no idea what happened to him? Have you not paid any attention to the news?"

I shook my head. "Don't bother with the stuff. Why? Is he running the place now?"

Danzo's jaw tightened; his expression as if he was suddenly suffering from a severe case of constipation.

"No," he finally replied tightly. "The one named Uchiha Sasuke is no longer alive. Unfortunately, he died in the ambush although it is believed that his sibling still exists. However, that is not of importance for you see, the man who currently runs Byaku-Shinkyou is also on my list of those who must be eliminated to preserve the integrity of Japan."

I was careful to keep my expression as neutral as possible, though I could literally feel my heart beating somewhere in my throat or close to it. I could barely swallow.

"Orochimaru is a parasite," Danzo was muttering now as if I was no longer in the vicinity. "A blood-sucking parasite that must be destroyed before he causes any more destruction. It was a bad decision on my part and Fugaku's to assume he could be trustworthy. Now, I see the error in my ways. Fugaku was first and apparently he hopes to eliminate me next...but we'll see who gets the upper hand when I finally have the power of the DIET in my grasp. My first order of business will be an executive order to dissolve the very existence of that place. What a mockery of the justice system it has become."

He stopped ranting long enough to realize I was still around, but giving me only a cursory glance and a quick wave of farewell, he slid into the car...but not before lowering the window to peer at me one last time.

"Do not forget our meeting at my home. I will send one of my men with more information about it. I hope you will not disappoint me, Uzumaki Naruto."

I gave him a mock salute. "You bet I'll be there, Shimura-san. Won't miss it for the world."

And I didn't.

The next week, I showed up at his fancy house – which was almost as big as Jiraiya's (if not bigger) – to a meal worthy enough for the royal house. I wasn't sure if he planned to stuff me to death, but I ate to my heart's content while listening to him ramble on and on and on about his plans for Japan. By the time he finally got to the nitty gritty; meaning taking on the job of becoming his personal assassin, I was halfway drunk and would have said "yes" to anything he suggested no matter how dumb it was.

"I need not tell you that anonymity is the key here, Naruto," he had droned. "You've already done a great job keeping your physical appearance a mystery to many while your name travels afar. A good thing because of the line of work you'll be getting into. I take it you accept my offer?"

I must have said "yes", because the next thing I knew, two shadows drifted into the room (turned out they were two of his goons) with items in their hands that they placed before the old man. He unfurled what looked like a scroll, in which a wicked-looking dagger sat wrapped in a worn, brown cloth. Watching in curiosity – and remember I was slightly intoxicated – he held up the dagger and read something in the scroll, then dipped the tip into one of the bowls the men had brought to him. To my bemusement, he proceeded to slash the inner forearm of his bum right arm and allowed the blood to _drip drip drip_ onto the scroll before him, while still muttering some kind of mumbo jumbo beneath his breath.

"Come closer, Uzumaki Naruto," he invited.

I really wanted to bolt from the scene or make up some excuse, but I knew I was already in too deep now. There was no escaping this fate I had chosen for myself. At the back of my mind I knew this was some blood oath thing that would seal my loyalty to him for as long as we both lived, and resigning myself to it, I obeyed his command. He tugged my arm roughly and barely giving me enough time to settle myself, the sudden sharp pain of the dagger's tip sinking into my flesh and forming a thin red line in its wake was enough to clear away any cobwebs of drunkenness I might have had left. I watched in fascination as my blood mingled with his, and as to my horror, he darted out an abrasive tongue to lick off the wound he had created. It was all I could do not to shudder in revulsion or punch his lights out, but with a curt command to his minion, a cold compress was placed against the wound as Danzo bent over the scroll to scribble out something with the pooled droplets of blood.

"It is official," he finally declared as he rolled it up again and put away the items with an efficiency that was admirable. He gave me a wan smile. "You may go about your business as deem fit, but every once in a while, you will receive a message from me regarding your assigned mission. Please read whatever dossier is presented to you carefully to get to know your victim properly. You are permitted to tail him for as long as you see it fit to know his schedule, but please make sure the mission is completed quickly and efficiently. I do not tolerate sloppy jobs, and if I see you are of no use to me..."

"I'm toast?" I offered with a smile that was matched by the cold one on his visage.

"Let's just say no one will miss your disappearance very much, Naruto. Do I make myself clear?"

"Crystal."

* * *

><p>And now, here I am...almost a month into being Danzo's henchman and finally getting my first major assignment.<p>

_(don't fuck it up)_

Surreal doesn't even begin to explain the way I feel at the moment; like a fucking out-of-body experience. I'm simply hovering somewhere and watching this man in the expensive suit making his way into the opulent apartment building almost two blocks away from the Grand Hotel itself. Compared to the lessons I had with Sergei, the distance wasn't all that far, so this could be an easy job all the way around.

Shika and #7 (_Shichi_) had done a great job scouting the hotel for me and letting me know which vantage point would work best.

I drew no extra glances – as I stepped into the quiet lobby - except for a beautiful woman in a slinky, sexy-as-hell evening gown draped on the arm of a much older man (sugar daddy maybe?). I gave her a playful wink which she returned with a coy smile and a blown kiss as I stepped into the empty elevator and watched the doors close slowly upon her heavily-made up face.

_(maybe in another life you and I could have known each other a little better, sweetheart)_

**1 – 2 – 3 – 4**

_(quick and efficient)_

**5 – 6 – 7 – ping**

The door slid open and an elderly foreign couple stepped in (they looked European) with polite smiles as I bowed in greeting and pressed myself closer to the paneled wall behind me.

_« ...__cette fille__a oublié__d'envoyer__le dîner__... »_

_« Désolé__, mon cher. __Je vais en parler__à la concierge__... »_

(yep. Definitely foreign. They talk like they've got colds or something. It is funny...whatever language that is)

**8 – 9 – ping**

They step out still chattering like pigeons, and I'm left alone again.

**10 – 11 – 12 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17**

_(quick and efficient)_

**18 – 19 – 20 **

Shikamaru was on standby in case of an emergency. Danzo didn't know he existed – at least I hoped he didn't. We were both sure he probably had tails on me, but the Magnificent Seven saw to it that we were never bothered when together. If Danzo was aware of Shikamaru's presence, he had not complained or bitched about it yet.

**21 – 22 – 23 – ping**

I stepped out to an empty hallway – thank goodness. My feet were soundless on the plush carpeting as I walked past rooms with doors that reminded me of the sort of things you see in the movies. I pushed open the door leading to the fire escape where several flights of stairs would lead me up to the roof without having to go through the penthouse suite. However, as I pushed open the heavy steel-like door, I was just about knocked off my feet at the sudden gust of wind to hit me like a brick wall.

"Fuck." This couldn't be good for the bullet's trajectory, but hey...Sergei had drilled a lesson into me on how to position myself to make sure that even if a goddamn hurricane was right in the path of the bullet, it would hit its target without fail. I think my jaw's still hurting from the blow he delivered to it after I told him he was full of shit for even thinking such a thing was possible. Live and learn as they say.

"Whew," I whistled beneath my breath in appreciation, making sure I remained hidden amongst the shadows created by the cooling system units and smokestacks rising from the roof. "Beautiful city, aren't you?"

And it truly was, though I was currently too busy trying to locate my target building and hotel room in particular. Whistling beneath my breath, I fell to my knees and began to set up my equipment, deliberately keeping my mind blank from any extraneous thoughts as fingers – after endless hours of training – automatically set to performing its duties. So as not to get my suit messy, I shrugged out of the jacket and lay it to the side neatly, rolled up the sleeves of my shirt (grimacing at the faint scar left on my arm thanks to that psycho), and unfurled the blue tarp/plastic lining which I laid on the ground for protection. Hey, it wouldn't do to suddenly go back downstairs with stains all over my suit, would it? Didn't need to have to explain anything to anybody.

_(and now we wait)_

I glanced at my watch.

9:43pm.

If Shika's itinerary was right, Ishida would still be at his party. My hope was that he wouldn't be one of those guys who partied until midnight or beyond. I really wanted to get this fucking job over and done with.

10:15pm.

I had to slap myself awake, but just long enough to peer through the telescopic sight to see if my target had returned.

No dice. Fuck it all to hell and back.

I sat up and stretched aching muscles, wishing I had brought at least a drink or something to keep me busy. If I smoked, I'd do so to kill time, but since I didn't...

_(back to work, Naruto!)_

I lay back on the tarp and focused my attention on the building before me. As the minutes ticked on endlessly, I was finding it increasingly hard to remember the lesson of being completely and utterly focused. Every now and then, my mind would drift away to thoughts of a certain someone, no thanks to the message Shika had delivered to me yesterday.

Sasuke was finally on the move. They would be leaving for the North in about a week or so, which was a good thing because with Orochimaru finally out of the way, Danzo would have one less 'bad influence' to worry about, but it would also mean that his stranglehold on the justice system would be greatly reduced once it was revealed that the Uchiha brothers were still alive and well. With Byaku-Shinkyou restored, all the ugly seeds (aka Danzo) would be flushed out like the vermin they were. The members of the watchdogs who had sided with the enemy would be replaced with more upright citizens and then the _purification_ of Japan would officially begin.

"Hah...purification of Japan indeed," I chuckled beneath my breath. "That's something the old you would have loved to do from the beginning anyway, eh, Sasuke?"

Still a part of me was more than glad he was finally going to deal with Snake Dude face-to-face. It had been years in the making, and God knows I wish I could be there to see the beat down in person, but I guessed I'd have to make do with imagining what the bloodbath would look like. The only thing I was going to regret was never getting the chance to see him before then. All I knew was that he was somewhere in Tokyo, and though it would have been easy for me to ask Temari for more details, recalling that Danzo was still not a 100% sure about me and my loyalties, suddenly visiting 'the dead' was bound to raise more than a few eyebrows.

I couldn't risk jeopardizing our positions with my desire to be with –

_(huh?)_

"Shit!"

_The lights were on!_

A quick glance at my watch revealed that almost an hour had passed since I drifted off to fantasy land, and kicking myself inwardly for already beginning to fail my mission, I took a deep breath and forced myself to focus again.

Squinting, I looked through the telescopic sight and into the lavish living room of the councilman. Lucky for me his curtains weren't drawn and I was given a great view of his stumbling arrival with two giggling scantily-clad women beneath each beefy arm.

_(hmm)_

This could be a problem if the damn chicks wouldn't get out of the way, and in addition, there were two other men (his bodyguards?) hovering in the vicinity. No...not bodyguards, for they all seemed to be sharing drinks and laughing over something.

**Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock.**

My head was beginning to throb, and I could feel a light sheen of sweat breaking out on my brow and upper lip. Still I remained calm and damn if that out-of-body feeling wasn't beginning to happen again. The sounds of the city began to fade away until there was nothing else but the steady, thudding sound of my heartbeat drumming within my ears. I stuck out my tongue in concentration as everything before me suddenly seemed clearer than ever before. Fucking 20/20 vision to the max. I could literally be standing on the window sill at this point and no one would notice my presence.

I could feel my teeth pulling back into a cold grin as the councilman fell onto the couch in a position that was absolutely fucking perfect for me. I watched with cold detachment as he rudely shoved one of the women to her knees, his large thighs spread apart to give her better access to his no-doubt fat, ugly dick. As her head bobbed up and down with an eagerness that would have made me jealous (if I was in the mood), her companion was busy having the fat slob's tongue stuck down her throat while he fondled her breasts...more like squeezed and tugged the poor thing as if they were dough.

My fingertip caressed the trigger.

_(he has a wife and two children)_

He smacked the ass of the girl he was kissing and tossed her to the side like a rag doll.

_(he raped several teenage girls...how old are these ones? Fourteen? Fifteen? Sixteen?)_

He was saying something to his friends who were watching the show with interest. I was almost tempted to take them out too. I would be doing the world a favor, wouldn't I?

"I'll send your love to your family later, you ugly fuck," I whispered.

And just as he reached out to tug the cock-sucking chick to her feet, I felt a block of ice settling into the pit of my stomach as I finally pulled the trigger. All I could sense from my end was the sharp jerk of the weapon bouncing against my shoulder. You could hardly hear the report as the bullet sailed through the distance between us, pierced through the glass so neatly (it was almost beautiful) before lodging itself right between his eyes. Watching his body stiffen, his lips falling open in a comical O before he slumped back onto the couch was honestly amusing. Hell, even the girl below was unaware she was still sucking the cock of a dead man, until the other one began to shriek (couldn't hear her but her body language and wide opened mouth was more than enough) as blood began to trickle from the wound I had created.

_(quick and efficient. Sergei would be fucking proud)_

When the other men in the room finally realized that something was terribly wrong, I knew my time was up. Just as quickly as I had set up, I put away my equipment and shrugged back into my jacket while fighting back a light yawn of weariness. Man, who knew taking out someone could be such a goddamn tiring job. Maybe in due time the shakes would start and the guilt would set in, but to be brutally honest, I think I have long passed that stage. After the first few killings, you begin to get used to it believe it or not, and after a while it just becomes simply another day at the office. Considering how torn up I had been after killing Kojima...

_(perhaps you're losing your humanity)_

_(...whatever)_

Maybe I'll ask Shika if he wants to join me for a late dinner.

I am _starving_.

* * *

><p>Councilman Ishida's death made the headline news.<p>

Yes! I was finally famous...even if no one knew who the hell I was. Still, it was cool to watch everyone speculate over who could be responsible for the shooting, and since the goddamn current police force was made up of a bunch of useless assholes, it was going to take a pretty long time before they even traced the bullet to me.

Danzo – for his part - was so impressed with my performance; he offered me another assignment less than a week later.

"But you will have to travel this time," he added as he offered me a glass of his finest whiskey in his fancy office within his home.

"Oh yeah? Where?" The drink burned its way down my throat and it was all I could do not to begin hacking out a lung in protest. Damn this shit was _strong._

"Tokyo."

My heart leapt at the name, though I did my best to mask my excitement at this declaration. Going to Tokyo meant being a step closer to Sasuke, and yes I knew Tokyo was a large place, but how difficult could it be finding the guy especially if I was extra careful? Besides, leaving Shikamaru to do the hunting would make the job much easier for me.

"Who's in Tokyo?" I finally asked when I was sure I could speak without giving away my state of mine. I was glad to find my voice sounded as bored as it usually did when in Danzo's presence.

"If I had my way, I'd request you take them all out, since that is the base of the DIET and most of those I loathe reside there, but we are going to take our sweet time with this."

"Why aren't you in Tokyo, if you're a member of the DIET?" I asked with a raised brow. I was met with a light frown as if daring to ask the impossible.

"There were a few...falsities being spread about me," Danzo finally replied as he settled into the sofa across me with a strained smile. "Let's just say my enemies were getting quite long winded with their many complaints, and I felt it best to leave the city until the commotion had died down."

Ah, so Itachi's plan to spread the propaganda against Danzo actually worked!

He snapped his fingers and his secretary (I think his name is Torune or something like that) appeared with two dossiers which he placed before me.

"You actually have two targets, but getting even one of them is more than enough for me."

I picked the folders up and opened the first. It revealed the picture of an old guy with the biggest and ugliest nose I had ever seen. His frowning visage didn't seem to make him any more friendly, and with his Fu Manchu white moustache and beard...this guy did not look like the kind of person you wouldn't want to piss off.

"Councilman Onoki," I read aloud.

"Yes...the very bane of my existence," Danzo replied icily. "He was one of the people responsible for spreading such lies and rumors about me, and seems to see it fit to drive me right of office despite my excellent record in the government. He has always wanted my seat, and now is his opportunity to take over."

"But...if you take him out...don't you think folks will begin to suspect you?"

"I am not in Tokyo," Danzo said with a light shrug. "I have not been 'seen' there in several months, so why would anyone assume I was the one responsible. To most of the members of the DIET, they believe I've run away with my tail between my legs, but they would be wrong, wouldn't they?"

I said nothing and looked through the other folder. This one was to a certain Councilman Sagara, who looked like a caricature of a human being with his skinny frame and oversized reading glasses. His buckteeth were prominent with his leery grin and according to his 'sins', he was responsible for the passing of several bills to tighten the regulations against illegal gambling and trading. A tricky case, all things considered, because this guy was actually doing something good, but in Danzo's world, he was a pain in the ass. Same with this Onoki character, although I had to admit that the name sounded familiar. I just couldn't place why he was so important though.

"So? Will you accept this assignment, Naruto?"

"Do I have a choice?"

His smile said everything. Saying "no" was definitely not an option.

_(Tokyo here I come)_

Later that evening I was sprawled out on Shikamaru's couch in his rented apartment, watching some boring chick flick about girls trying to find their 'true callings' in life, while Shikamaru was busy writing up some crap at his desk. I had already told him about my latest assignment to Tokyo, which he was obviously excited about as it would give him another opportunity to catch up with his girl.

Lucky bastard.

I have not had sex in _months_ and temptation had beckoned so often in all my missions or assignments that I was really _this_ close to breaking point. Masturbating can only take you so far, and though I was sure Sasuke was probably no longer in Tokyo (though I was praying hard as hell that they had delayed their departure), I had a feeling I was going to have to break my promise and at least find a willing partner to ease the building tension within me.

"Guess who called me today?" I finally drawled as the not-very-helpful images of the women prancing around the beach in bikinis flashed on the screen. I dug around for the remote control to change the channel fast.

"Who?" Shikamaru asked absently.

"Satoshi."

"...the second lieutenant?"

"Yep."

"What did he want?"

I shook my head as a small smile tugged my lips. "I told you the bastard still wants me bad. Told him I was going to Tokyo for a business trip and he says he's going there too...says we should meet up at his hotel when I get there."

"Don't tell me you're going."

I shrugged lightly. "Shika, my dear clueless friend, you do realize that I can't say "no" to a very important ally. I have to at least indulge the guy a little."

"...even when you know he wants to jump into your pants?"

"_Especially_ knowing he wants to jump into my pants. Tease him until I get what I fucking want, that's the way we play the game."

I lifted my gaze to meet Shikamaru's. He shook his head and rolled his eyes. "You are such a fucking slut, man."

"Slut? I haven't seen any pussy let alone a goddamn dick, that didn't make me want to vomit, in months!" I protested. "At least you got to fuck Temari for an entire weekend. I've been having an affair with tons of lotions and tissues so far." I sat up to lean over the back of the couch overemphasizing my groan of misery as I pouted at him. "You think Sasuke will be there though?"

"Who knows? They did say they'd be leaving for Hokkaido last week. I haven't been able to get Temari since then, so can't give you any update."

"Maybe I should ask Jiraiya if he has heard anything," I mumbled.

"Considering you haven't spoken to the guy in weeks -"

"Bah!" I waved a hand in dismissal and flopped back onto the sofa with another groan. "Oh God! I wanna have seeeex! I'm dying here!"

"Don't look at me, you insatiable bastard," Shika retorted. "Go get your kicks at a local brothel. Don't think Sasuke will kill you for just messing around once, will he? Geez. You guys aren't married."

"I made a promise," I muttered beneath my breath, before it suddenly clicked at what he was implying. I sat up with my jaw somewhere on the ground, though my cheeks felt like they were burning so hot, torching them was likely to scorch me.

"Wait...I mean...what's that supposed to mean?" I stuttered.

"What's what supposed to mean?"

"You...eh...knew about Sasuke and I?" I managed to croak out.

Shikamaru snorted. "Hardly much of a surprise, was it? The way you two locked yourselves away for the entire fucking day doing what I'm not interested in knowing by the way. Yeah, I'd just about say _everyone_ knew you two were spending some _quality_ time together."

"So why didn't you say anything all this time?"

"What the fuck did you want me to say?" he asked incredulously. "Congratulations! Here have a packet of condoms on the house and try not to leave your cum stains all over the couch?"

I flushed. "Not that! I just thought...well...when we were talking about it one time I think you thought it was pretty disgusting at the idea of even giving him a hickey and..."

Shikamaru sighed loudly and waved for me to shut up. "Listen, I honestly don't give a damn who you decide to sleep with, and if it turns out that Sasuke's the one to keep your dick happy, then more power to you both. I don't need to know the details, and I'm not asking you to tell me the details, all right? Now...goodnight, Mr. Sexless. I've had a pretty long day and want to get some sleep. Sweet dreams."

He laughed as I gave him the middle finger in salute, though my heart wouldn't stop beating like a snare drum at Shikamaru's roundabout 'blessing'...if you wanted to consider it that.

I don't know why, or how to explain it, but for some reason knowing that someone else knew about our relationship made it more...tangible and _real_, you know? That all this time, perhaps a part of me had considered the entire thing as nothing more than a fantasy, and that I'd probably wake up some day and realize it had all been one big ugly dream while still trapped within the cold, unforgiving walls of the dungeons awaiting my final purification.

Still I had to admit that even though the chances of meeting him were slim to none, just the very _thought_ of _actually_ getting that opportunity was all the more reason why counting down the minutes, hours and days before my trip...would be the most agonizing wait I've ever experienced.

One could only hope that my desperate prayers would answered. If not, I swear even that bastard Satoshi would have to do for a quick fix.


	38. 38: Over the Hills and Far Away

**Notes:** *pokes head into room* Have they all abandoned me? *sniffles* My sincere apologies for the lengthy delay. Between being in a writing funk and studying for my upcoming nursing exams, yours truly has shied away from this story. It's not fair to you readers to keep you waiting for so long (as I've been on the receiving end of such situations and it's no fun having your favorite stories just stop with no update or word from the author). So my thanks to those who have left feedback, the new readers who gave this story a chance, and your continued support and encouragement. It really warms my heart to know that this 'Epic' (what else to call it?) hasn't bored the pants off you yet *lol* Just know that it is definitely winding down, so give me a few more chapters to wrap it all nicely (well as nicely as I can), okay? Love y'all and happy reading!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 38<strong>

**Over the Hills and Far Away**

Though a swift stream is

Divided by a boulder

In its headlong flow,

Though divided, on it rushes,

And at least unites again.

**Emperor Sutoku**

* * *

><p><strong>Byaku-Shinkyou<strong>

**Hokkaido Prefecture**

_A failure._

He stared at the coded printout until his vision swam and the words became nothing more than incoherent blurs that mocked him. His head pounded like a drummer run amok; his tongue heavy within a mouth that was rapidly becoming drier than a desert in summer. He just _couldn't_ believe it.

_The mission...an utter failure._

How was that even possible? How could he have lost _four_ of the most highly-skilled assassins within Orochimaru's elite force? To think that Ginkaku, Kinkaku, and Sora would be eliminated so easily, and worst of all, that Sai – THAT Sai – who had _never_ failed a mission in the past, would be found lying in a pool of his blood in a derelict alley in the middle of God knows where.

_Damn it! Damn it! Damn it!_

Where had he gone wrong? Where had his best-laid plans gone awry? For years he had believed himself to be the most level-headed amongst the others his master surrounded himself with. Hadn't he done enough to prove his competency to Orochimaru so far? Hadn't he done more to convince his cynical overlord that he could handle things even when he was not around? However, the fact that Orochimaru had not given his 'yay' or 'nay' on this plan in the first place nor had he gone out of his way to pester Kimimaro for results, was clearly a sign that Orochimaru had not trusted or believed it would have worked!

_He simply watched from the sidelines...waiting for me to fail...no...**expecting** it to fail. He must have known the final outcome. He must have - !_

"Did you not hear me summon you, Kimimaro?" came the quiet question that had the younger man spinning around quickly with his heart somewhere in the pit of his stomach. For a second, breathing was impossible as he stared at the elongated shadows of his master gliding across the room.

"My...my Lord..." Kimimaro began in a voice that sounded faint. He tried to hide the document behind him, but trembling fingers refused to cooperate as it floated to the floor as if eager to depart his person. However, a desperate lurch to grab it was foiled as - from seemingly out of nowhere - Orochimaru's familiar golden cane pinned it in place with a loud stab. Odd in itself for the older man was still hidden amongst the shadows while the cane had 'stretched' out – as if simply an extension of its master.

Kimimaro cursed beneath his breath and straightened up, watching with growing trepidation as the paper was dragged across the floor. He watched long, lean alabaster fingers finally reach for it, causing him to give an inner sigh of resignation. With his head lowered and eyes closed, he waited for the mocking laughter at his grand miscalculation. He briefly entertained being punished severely for this; his masochistic side eager to suffer Orochimaru's brand of sexual torture where the very idea of walking properly, for at least a week, was not an option. He shivered and wrapped his arms around himself, praying that there would be less scars this time around. At least he had Jūgo now to ease the pain. Jūgo would be there to kiss and heal his wounds. And though Jūgo would have many silent questions within those brown eyes, Kimimaro knew he'd have to keep up the pretense of "everything is okay". He had failed with earning Haku's loyalty, there was no way he was going to make the same mistake with Jūgo now that he was back in his life.

"A shame," Orochimaru finally commented after what seemed like an eternity. "To suffer defeat in such an unsightly way is a terrible disgrace, isn't it, my dear Kimimaro?"

There was something deceptively calming and soothing about Orochimaru's voice. It was a tone that Kimimaro knew he ought to ignore as best he could - for he was sure his sadistic master had absolutely no pity whatsoever for him - and yet a heavy boulder called 'humiliation' settled upon him so suddenly, his eyes stung with the promise of tears.

_Shit! Just what I don't nee –_

"Come now," the silky voice continued, only it was so much closer. Kimimaro would only have time to notice the bottom of the black velvet robe sweeping the floor, before the cold fingers tipped his chin upwards.

It took all of his skill not to gasp in shock at the face before him. He had not seen his master in over a week – at least not since his report back from the bombing of the _yakuza_ leaders in Tokyo. Even then, all he had been privy to was the back of Orochimaru's head as his master's continued obsession with the numerous video screens, in his underground hideout, continued.

(what kind of a monster have I been living with? Who...who are you...really?)

Orochimaru had always been pale, but now...not having seen the sun in seemingly eons, Kimimaro was practically looking at a translucent figure, so much so, it was not difficult to see the ribbons of veins and arteries threading through the exposed flesh of his hands, neck and face. Said face was nothing more than a skull with a thin layer of flesh hanging on. His cheekbones stood prominent, his lips twin shades of dull blue. His eyes were sunken in, the snake-like pupils still as sharp and observant as ever, though the dark circles around them revealed a man who knew little to no sleep. His long black hair lay limp upon his head, giving the impression that even touching it was likely to have more than a few strands falling off.

In short, his master looked _ghastly_.

_Yet any one foolish enough to be deceived by how he looks would be in for a rude awakening,_ Kimimaro thought uneasily as a black fingernail traced the outline of his lips gently. There was still a latent power within his master. There was no denying that. He had no doubt he would and could be crushed easily.

"It looks like you grossly underestimated your opponents," Orochimaru rasped and dug his fingernail a little deeper into Kimimaro's cheek. "Perhaps the lesson learned during the failed ambush at Gudan was not enough for you?"

"I apologize, my Lord," Kimimaro whispered, barely able to contain his wince of pain as he felt the slight trickle of blood trail down his cheek.

"First it was with that pathetic waif you picked up in the snow...what was his name again?"

Kimimaro suffered the show of sharp canines as Orochimaru sneered openly at him. Of course Orochimaru knew who Haku was. It was just his way of signifying how little the younger man now meant to him. In defiance, at this blatant mockery, Kimimaro remained silent.

Orochimaru's grin widened. "And now, it's that insane young man you considered the best of the best. To think that the one you trusted would betray you..._again_. It must be a blow to your pride, isn't it?" He _tutted_ in disappointment. "And not only that, you managed to get three of my best officers killed thanks to your hare-brained idea. Now tell me...give me a good reason why I shouldn't eliminate you right here and now, my dear one?"

Kimimaro's hands formed tight fists, but he remained silent simply waiting for Orochimaru to be done with this little charade. He knew as much as the older man that he was an indispensable asset. Kimimaro was the face that Orochimaru dared not show to the world. Who else could he really trust in this place he called a kingdom? And with the departure of the one he had groomed to take his place – Sasuke – they both knew that eliminating Kimimaro was next to impossible.

(you need me as much as I think I need you)

The fingernails dug deeper until his blood coated the pale flesh and yet Kimimaro did not budge. He stared into those eyes that dared him to look away, to accept defeat, and when none was forthcoming, the pressure was eventually lessened.

"You are lucky we are at war," Orochimaru finally grunted with a hard release of the other man's chin, so much so Kimimaro almost lost his footing and had to steady himself against his desk. Orochimaru spun away and glided toward the window – and even at that, seemed content to remain within the shadows formed by the curtains instead of standing within the rays of the mid-afternoon sun.

_Almost as if he is afraid of it, _Kimimaro mused thoughtfully.

"And I unfortunately need you by my side."

_Un...fortunately...?_

Orochimaru caressed the tip of his walking cane – as if petting the head of the golden snake with its ruby eyes that glared coldly at the other man in the room.

"I can feel them," came the quiet words that sent a jolt down Kimimaro's spine. He looked up long enough to catch the tightening of his master's jaw as those eyes continued to stare at the distant mountains in the horizon. "I can smell them coming...hundreds...no...thousands of sinners. All coming home for a grand purification. Their stench is sickening, but we are ready, aren't we?"

He closed his eyes and lifted his arms as if summoning some unseen demon.

"The preparations have begun in earnest, my dear one. The stadium rebuilt for the poor souls who know not what they are about to do. I will sacrifice them all to our benevolent god! One who hears our cry for purity and washes away our iniquities! The air has been polluted and convoluted with their erroneous ways and we must purge them as our ancestors have decreed! Japan will be clean again! It will become a nation of people eager to become children of the one true god! They will come to thank me someday, Kimimaro. I will see to it no matter how long it takes!"

He lowered his arms and took a deep breath as if the very act of his impassioned speech had taken everything out of him. At least he looked less death-like now as a flush of color filled his cheeks and his eyes now seemed to glow with a fire that had been lacking lately.

"Do you feel him?" came the sudden question that had Kimimaro slightly bemused.

"Feel...who, my Lord?"

"He is coming back to where he belongs," Orochimaru continued cryptically. "He has seen the errors of the world and has made up his mind to come back to me. I prayed about it, you see...and it is finally coming true."

He turned to Kimimaro then, and the younger man was stunned to see tears within the older man's eyes.

_Tears? Since when did...?!_

"My Sasuke is coming back home to me," came the hoarse words that sent a flare of unwarranted anger and jealousy down Kimimaro's spine. A cruel part of him wanted to remind the delusional man that Sasuke didn't give a damn about him anymore, but Kimimaro figured watching the rejection all over again would be worth it.

"We must prepare for his return!" Orochimaru announced with a flourish as he swept out of the room. "Send a message to our troops stationed at the Mount Usu. They are to begin their march towards the South as soon as possible. After all...it would be very rude to keep our guests waiting, hmm? Oh and one more thing."

Kimimaro, who had turned to reach for a handkerchief to wipe away the bloodstains, froze in mid-reach to look up again in bemusement. Orochimaru was at the door, and instead of the tears of 'joy' at the prospect of meeting Sasuke again, there was that familiar cold sneer of derision on his visage.

"Try not to fuck this up, Kimimaro," came the low warning tinged with a venom that spoke volumes. "I can only be patient with you for so long."

And with that, he was gone, leaving in his wake a man now filled with more questions than answers and a fear that the ticking clock of his life really could be winding down to a swift and unknown end.

* * *

><p>"Do you fear death?"<p>

Jūgo dragged himself out of the stupors of his sexual haze to look at the man beside him. Kimimaro's back was to him; a broad strong back etched with scars of his years with the sadistic one he called a master. Jūgo had kissed and traced every inch of them with a reverence that had brought tears to his eyes and tonight had been no different. The gentle night breeze, coupled with the air permeated with the heavy musk of their coupling, caused Jūgo to shiver in pleasurable delight. He would have reached out to touch his lover again, but with the glance thrown over the other man's shoulder, Jūgo felt his heart stop for a second.

(Kimimaro...)

Those pale green eyes were filled with a sadness so deeply etched within them; it was all he could do not to...

(ah fuck it)

He sat up to all but yank Kimimaro into his arms; hugging him so tight, he seemed to want to meld their bodies into one. Gone was the strong, intimidating second-in-command that inspired fear amongst the inhabitants of this place. In his arms, all Jūgo could feel was a frail, trembling lover and friend he would do _anything_ for.

"Let's run away," Jūgo whispered feverishly into the thick white hair that cascaded down the older man's back like a silk curtain. "Please, I beg you. Let's get away from here...away from it all. We can live a happy life together, Kimimaro. I know it. You don't need him. You just think you do, but I promise that once we get out of here, everything will be okay again."

Kimimaro remained limp in the embrace, though his heart was a thunderous drum within his chest and his head swam with the ridiculous and almost romantic notion of eloping with this man. If he closed his eyes and let it be, he could almost believe that he could do what Jūgo requested of him. He could grab his _yukata_ right now, take his hand and flee into the mountains and leave this all behind...

(like a coward...nothing but a pathetic coward...as you've always been)

He winced at the sneering comment that filled his mind. It was Orochimaru reminding him yet again of how weak he really was in spirit and of how Jūgo's dream for them could never become a reality. He had committed himself to this life, and Jūgo – dear precious Jūgo – would never know just how dark, filthy and decayed this heart had become over the years. He was not fit to be with one as good as Jūgo. People like him deserved to be thrown into a pit of lions and ripped limb from limb. He was used goods after all.

"You never answered my question," Kimimaro whispered against the beating heart. His lips pursed to place a tender kiss on the salty flesh. "Do you fear death?"

"No," Jūgo replied without hesitation. "If you are the one responsible for it...then I will not fear death."

Kimimaro closed his eyes and bit into the bronzed chest tenderly. "You are so naïve."

"I don't care -"

"I could kill you if I wanted to -"

"Then I'll die for you, my love."

With a light grunt, Kimimaro pushed himself away to look up into those eyes that appeared determined, stubborn and downright beautiful to him. He blushed as Jūgo leaned closer to place tender kisses on the twin red birthmarks upon his forehead – a silly gesture he had always done even when they were children and one that Kimimaro appreciated more than words could ever convey.

(thank you, Jūgo...for everything)

"Then you will have your chance sooner than you think," Kimimaro whispered as he placed a hand against the broad chest to push him back onto the futon. He straddled the prone man, eyes remained locked on the questioning but warm ones beneath him, and with a sigh of pleasure he impaled himself upon his lover again and began to move in a steady rhythm.

"The tides of war are coming ashore," came the cryptic words breathed into Jugo's ear. "Then you will have to prove yourself to me, my love. For if our time on this earth is to come to an end...my dying wish is to spend my very last moments with you."

* * *

><p>Suigetsu's lashes flew open at the lone but faint bark that filtered through his window.<p>

He swung his legs off the bed and dressed quickly, his feet soundless around the room for he knew there were two guards stationed in the hallway outside the bedroom door. With his _katana_ secure, he peered out the window carefully.

No one in the courtyard. _Perfect._

With the ease of a feline, he leapt out the window and darted across the expanse of land before he could garner the attention of the night guards on duty. Not that those guys were even that alert these days. With Orochimaru hardly showing his face around here lately, most of the guards had adopted a laissez-faire attitude to their jobs. All the better, in Suigetsu's humble opinion. This whole place was going down in flames eventually anyway.

He found Kiba at their planned rendezvous point beside an abandoned shackle next to the river. At night, there was something haunting and almost beautiful about the way the water sparkled beneath the moon and stars (and boy was it a clear night too!). The soothing sounds created could almost lull one to sleep...except that was the furthest thing from their minds tonight.

The source of the bark trotted up to him, a small white dog that Kiba had adopted since their arrival here. Though the keeping of pets was not really frowned upon, it was rare for anyone to take to animals that quickly – well besides the big guy (Jūgo). Between them, Suigetsu was sure they could run a zoo efficiently.

"Hey, Akamaru. How's it going?" Suigetsu greeted with a gentle pat on the dog's head before walking closer to Kiba who was hard at work with something. On closer inspection, Kiba – who was hunched over – appeared to be writing something on a small piece of paper while a large (and rather majestic-looking) snow owl sat patiently beside him.

"Christ. Where the fuck did that thing come from?" Suigetsu asked as he sat on a decaying tree trunk beside his companion. "Did Jūgo send it?"

Kiba nodded without looking up. In fact, he hadn't even looked up when Suigetsu had arrived, which would have annoyed Suigetsu if it wasn't for the knowledge that Kiba seemed to be able to tell whenever someone was coming from miles away. The guy really was like an animal himself, able to sniff out things faster than either he or Jūgo could ever do. Absently petting Akamaru, who had now made himself comfortable on Suigetsu's lap, he took the time to study Kiba in silence.

They rarely talked to each other except to relay information or discuss plans (especially with that botched arson fiasco). Though he seemed to give the illusion of being quiet and thoughtful, Suigetsu had definitely seen the other side of Kiba a few times. Back in their training days at Akatsuki, Kiba was always the loud one, the party animal (no pun intended), who could whip their other team mates into a frenzy even if it was over a simple card game. His face alone could be the subject of conversation with those twin red marks that went down each check (said it was a family tradition or whatever), and dark eyes that could pierce right through you if you stared into them long enough. His short dark brown hair looked shaggy and unkempt most of the time, though he managed to control it with a head band so it didn't keep falling into his face. He was just about the same height as Suigetsu, and well built as evident from the few times he had noticed Kiba training with his shirt off...

(and why the fuck would I want to notice that anyway?)

Suigetsu shook his head angrily and blamed the errant thought on having to deal with that psycho's violation of his body; something he still couldn't and wouldn't live down. He was just glad that both Kiba and Jūgo hadn't tried pestering him about it. Suigetsu would have killed them anyway.

"Finished," Kiba announced quietly as he held out the written note to Suigetsu. "What do you think?"

For any one else, the tiny shapes and letters would be nothing but Greek to them, but thanks to their training, Suigetsu was able to understand the coded message easily. Jūgo, who was (again) spending the night with this 'boyfriend' had sent the message to the owl, which was to be relayed to the forming Akatsuki army in the mountains ASAP.

According to the 'boyfriend', Orochimaru was making the first move and was to send over five hundred soldiers toward Usu in about two days.

"Five hundred, eh?" Suigetsu whistled beneath his breath. He lifted his head to stare at said mountains which looked ominous and frightening at nighttime. A sudden chill went down his spine as he handed the note back to Kiba, who was quick to tie it to the owl's talon. Once done, a quick whispered command sent the bird flying into the air with a grace that had both men staring at it in awe until it was nothing more than a speck in the sky.

"Think they have enough troops stationed up there for Orochimaru's army?" Suigetsu eventually asked as Akamaru leapt off his lap to seek his master's warmth.

"Should be," Kiba replied absently. "The last message Jūgo received said that about three hundred of them were already stationed at Tarumae." He picked up a stick to draw a series of triangles connected together –signifying mountains by Suigetsu's guess. He drew two straight lines going across two of the 'triangles'. "Usu is to the north...Tarumae to the south. If they get the message on time, they should be able to set troops here...and here..." He marked two large Xs. "And that effectively surrounds Orochimaru's troops. Itachi and Shisui know the mountains well, so there should be no pro..."

The words died on his lips as his entire body immediately stiffened. Suigetsu, who had been engrossed with the drawing, noticed the sudden change and looked up quickly; his hand already caressing the tip of his _katana_.

"What is -?" he began, but was silenced as Kiba rudely slapped a hand over his mouth.

"Someone's coming," Kiba hissed beneath his breath.

Suigetsu couldn't see a damn thing, but then again, hadn't he admitted that Kiba was almost always right about these sort of things? In fact –

"Duck!" Kiba commanded harshly, forcing Suigetsu to lie flat on the cold ground (much to his chagrin) as they remained hidden behind the cluster of bushes. Suigetsu could feel his heart thundering loudly in his chest, his adrenaline beginning to pump harder and faster at the promise of a skirmish with someone..._anyone_. He didn't give a fuck who. It's been a long time since he had the opportunity to cut someone open and this time, he wouldn't hesitate to take out the unfortunate punk deciding to eavesdrop on them –

"Come on, already!" came the faint but impatient words as hurried footsteps approached. "Goddamn it, don't make me hit you again!"

A low sniffling accompanied this, and both Kiba and Suigetsu eyed each other with raised brows. Two people and one of them definitely didn't sound like he wanted to be there.

"I...I don't want to do this..." the other voice whimpered in protest, but a loud slap accompanied by a low howl of pain, had Kiba literally growling beneath his breath. A sound Akamaru all but mimicked as his hair seemed to stand on edge.

Suigetsu lifted his head a little to see what was going on, and at first couldn't understand what he was witnessing. There were two men all right, one of them an officer he had encountered a few times around the grounds, and the other clearly a sinner as obvious from the familiar drab _yukata_ he was wearing. There would have been nothing wrong with this picture, except for what the officer was about to do. He was all but tossing the younger, slighter man – couldn't be older than fifteen at least – against a tree and yanking the guy's clothing higher to reveal his pale ass cheeks to the night air. The teen clung to the tree in miserable resignation, his quiet sobs mingling with the harsh and excited breathing of the ugly bastard about to stick his dick into him.

Suigetsu felt the bile of disgust welling within him at the sight; the memories of Orochimaru's cold fingers violating and tearing him apart overriding any and all other rational thought. Besides, he had always hated that officer anyway. The guy always had this leery look on his face and smelt like sour onions.

"Suigetsu..." Kiba began, but he was talking to thin air, for just as the officer had grabbed the sinner's hips to begin thrusting in earnest, the sharp glint of a _katana_ being unsheathed was immediately followed by a head flying through the air; a comical expression of ecstasy and shock on its visage before it landed on the bank of the river with a sickening thud. Suigetsu yanked the body away from the sinner and, as if adding insult to injury, sliced off the still erect penis cleanly. Like the head, it sailed into the air but landed (fortunately) into the river where some unfortunate soul was bound to wonder why there was a mutilated male organ floating in there come morning.

"Goddamn it," Kiba hissed in irritation as he stepped out of his hiding place with Akamaru whining in tow. "You just don't know when to hold back, do you?"

"He had it coming," Suigetsu replied with a nonchalant shrug. He wiped his sword upon the officer's uniform and returned it to its sheath. He flashed a grin at Kiba before turning to the stupefied sinner still frozen against the tree.

"At least pull your _yukata_ down, goddamnit," Suigetsu finally commanded impatiently. "I don't need to keep seeing your ass like that, and besides you can thank me later."

He winked and sauntered toward the head while whistling beneath his breath, leaving Kiba and the boy to look at each other in quizzical silence.

_Now what?_

"Go back to your quarters," Kiba finally said quietly. "And do not mention this to anyone, do you understand?"

Like he needed to be told that twice. The boy nodded with tears of gratitude filling his eyes (though the fear was still there) and began to slink away slowly. Every now and then, he'd look back as if to make sure the officers wouldn't turn on him, but when he noticed Kiba's impatient wave for him to take a hike, and Suigetsu still busy admiring the head he had looped off, he ran as fast as his legs could take him. He, at least, couldn't wait to tell his fellow sinners that there were some good officers around here.

"What do you think?" Suigetsu asked as he held up the severed head by its hair to dangle it before Kiba. Blood still gushed from the protruding muscles, ligaments, veins, arteries and goodness knew what else was in there. "I should probably -"

"Try to get rid of the goddamn body," Kiba retorted. "He was an important high-ranking officer, you piece of shit. If he doesn't show up tomorrow for work, what do you think is gonna happen?"

"Like I give a fuck," Suigetsu replied as he kicked the body for good measure. "We are at war, in case you haven't noticed, Kiba. The more folks we take down here, the better for our boys over there."

Kiba sneered. "So what's the plan now? Start taking down the officers one after the other? You do realize that this was probably videotaped, right?"

Suigetsu eyed the surroundings, noting nothing but the monstrous trees around them which acted as a cocoon from watchful eyes. "Cameras, eh? So what? Let them come at me. If I'm gonna die, I'm going to take at least a hundred of them with me."

"A hundred and one," Kiba replied with a smirk that had Suigetsu raising a brow.

"Oh yeah?" Sharp canines flashed in the night. "Two hundred, fuck face."

"Two hundred and one...and start digging a hole, dipshit. We need to bury this guy fast."

Suigetsu snorted and looked like he was about to protest, but at the grim look thrown his way, he sighed and set to work. Might as well get started. Goodness knows there were going to be plenty of more shallow graves they'd have to dig soon enough.

* * *

><p><em>Naruto:<em>

**Nishitama District, Tokyo**

Watchdogs patrolled the area either on foot or on horses, the familiar yellow tape blocking off curious pedestrians and oncoming traffic. Though the bombing had taken place several days ago, tendrils of smoke still managed to snake their way into the heavens from the rubble that remained. The once grand estate belonging to the _kumichō_ of the Hamza Syndicate was now nothing more than a relic of an era that was gradually coming to an end.

At least I hope to make it that way eventually.

I chewed my bubblegum a little faster and tried to make a bubble out of it. It was a decent enough size before it burst – much to my disappointment. My goal was to one day blow a bubble so big, it would cover my entire face. Anyway, first things first. I have a very important meeting to attend shortly and no time to fuck around here.

Why was I here in the first place? Only because Danzo had all but chewed off my head in his frustration at the news of this ambush. He was sure Orochimaru was behind it, and my personal investigation into the matter seemed to prove Danzo's theories right. Funny how Snake Dude seemed to be onto Danzo already and was doing his part to make sure the old geezer no longer had anyone to back him up in government. Ironic as well because Akatsuki was trying to do the same thing!

I spun on my heels to leave the scene, blending effortlessly into the throng of onlookers – mostly tourists eager to see the site of the latest failure in Japanese politics.

Today, my disguise was a little more elaborate, having consulted with one of my Magnificent Seven (#4 – Yottsu), who suggested that perhaps wearing a complete 'face mask' would work better than simply a wig and contact lenses. This 'mask' was nothing more than a thin layer of a skin-like material he would apply to my face every morning. It was quick work too, all things considered, and he confessed that before he was recruited into the _yakuza_, he had always dreamed of becoming a make-up artist for the movies. I made a mental note to make sure his dream came true if we survived this ordeal. He was too good to remain hidden in the shadows with a sword, when he could transform someone with just a few mixtures of paste, paints and brushes in just the right way. To take off the mask, all I had to do was peel it off, and if I was in a hurry, I could apply it again just as quickly. The bad thing about them? They itched...especially when the weather became too hot, but that was a small price to pay. I just had to make sure I wasn't outside for too long or it was likely to melt off my face. Bleh.

All that aside, I was finally in Tokyo! Yes!

Shika and I arrived yesterday morning – with some of the Magnificent Seven as back up - and I was determined to sightsee as much as possible...and would have if it wasn't for Danzo's phone call and subsequent whine about his well-laid plans being foiled.

_That old bastard! _

He successfully dampened my enthusiasm (read as search for you-know-who) and I was now sure he had his pawns stationed all over Tokyo to watch my every move. It was the reason why the mask had to come in handy. As far as Danzo (and his spies) knew, I was still stuck in the hotel at this moment. My hope was that this meeting set up by one of my targets would be effective. Thanks to Temari, she had gotten in contact with Itachi and Shisui to relay the current situation. If their plans went according to plan, I could get out of this particular job with no unnecessary blood shed.

I spotted the restaurant I was to wait in and ordering myself a bowl of steaming _tempura udon_, I decided to take the time to not only savor the delicious meal, but the sights and sounds around me. It was sometimes hard to reconcile the happy, smiling (or sometimes frowning) faces within the tumultuous world I had become involved in. Yet as I watched mothers with innocent children, young couples holding hands and so in love (it was almost sickening...or maybe I was just envious), or old people who had seen the world turn in so many different ways, I reminded myself of what this country really was.

(my home)

Japan was a beautiful place despite its many flaws. So yeah, maybe we were not as developed as the Western world (as per the movies and magazines seemed to detail), but we were slowly but surely getting there. Why did we need to go back to being Isolationists like Danzo suggests? Or become a nation of religious-crazed-righteous-purification psychopaths like Orochimaru wants? Why did we have to be run by factions of power-hungry bastards like Ikegami, who only seemed determined to make Japan subservient to them? I didn't get it. What was so wrong in wanting a completely democratic nation where people were free to choose how they wanted to live without being force-fed one's ideology? Was that what my father had wanted all this time? Was that what he was trying to explain to the _yakuza_ before he was killed for believing in a nation that could become really 'free' in every sense of the word?

/Naruto...the _yakuza_ will always exist even when this war is over/

I made a face as Shikamaru's words came back to haunt me. His pessimistic outlook was something that still nagged at me, but damn it! One of us had to at least look at the bright side of things, right?

A shadow fell over me and I looked up casually, assuming it was the cute waitress returning to ask if I wanted my glass refilled. However, at the sight of the petite dark-haired woman (or if it was a guy – since this person was in Western clothes that didn't reveal much in the chest area - he was quite pretty). Large dark eyes scowled and studied me for a long minute, and I briefly wondered if my mask had slipped off to reveal my real face.

"It is foolish to deal with a fool," came the clipped words of a Japanese proverb.

"One cannot quarrel without an opponent," I replied with a weak smile. Yep. Guess she's my 'date'. And it's definitely got to be a girl now. Something in her tone gave it away.

She nodded in satisfaction at my rehearsed answer and eyed my half-finished meal. "We must hurry. We have no time to waste."

_Damn._ I paid a lot for this food too...until I mentally kicked myself and remembered that with the money Danzo's throwing at me, I could buy ten bowls of _udon_ and still have cash to spare. I guess old habits die hard.

I followed obediently, being sure not to stare too long at the derriere before me. It was another painful reminder of my celibacy at how aware I was of every damn thing when it came to another human being, especially if said human was remotely attractive. I was still holding onto the dream that Sasuke hadn't left town and somehow this meeting would enable me to gain access to their hideout. Just the very notion of seeing him again was beginning to churn the adrenaline within me. Unfortunately, the boner I was about to experience all but withered at the sight of our driver as I slid into the white van parked at the curb.

_Holy...shit...! This guy is massive!_

It was a miracle he could even fit into the damn vehicle, and yet as he turned around to reveal a friendly, smiling visage, I had a feeling all he had to do was sit on someone and he'd be dead in a heartbeat.

"Hello," he greeted jovially. "You must be Uzumaki Naruto, eh?"

"Just drive Akatsuchi," the girl commanded impatiently. "Ōnoki-sama's waiting."

"All right, all right. I was just trying to introduce myself," Akatsuchi grumbled and turned back to face the wheel. His movement alone had the van rocking from side to side a little until he settled in and took us out to Tokyo traffic.

"Nice to meet you, Akatsuchi," I greeted back after a minute of awkward silence. Didn't want to give the big guy the impression that I wasn't keen on becoming friends. I eyed the girl who was pressed against the window and staring out of it. She seemed determined not to know I existed.

"Don't mind Kurotsuchi," the big guy said with a chuckle that earned a glare from the girl. "She's always like that with everyone, but she's actually nice when you get to know her."

"I told you to stop talking already," Kurotsuchi huffed, though from her flushed cheeks, I could see the feminine nature seeping through. "You just don't know when to mind your own business, do you?"

"Aww Kurot-chan," he whined playfully. "Don't be like that."

"Are you two dating?" I asked with a smile and nearly got my head singed with the death ray of a look flashed my way.

Akatsuchi guffawed in delight. "Hell no. We're just good friends almost like brother and sister. Ōnoki-sama is her grandfather though and we grew up in his household since we were babies."

"Why must you share our life story with a man who plans to kill my grandfather?"

Ooh...guess that would explain the bitchiness.

"Listen," I began. "I don't want to -"

"Save your excuses for later," she snarled. "If I wasn't on orders to behave myself, I would have killed you on the spot in that restaurant. You _yakuza_ make me sick. You go about terrorizing innocent people just because you've got the money and power. Gramps has been fighting against people like you for years, and he'll continue to fight until his dying breath! We will never let you win! Never!"

She looked as if she was going to say something else, but the wobble of her lips and the tears shimmering in her eyes forced her to turn away again and press herself even closer to the window as if hoping to melt into it. I bit my lower lip and sagged wearily on my seat, wishing I could explain that I was completely nothing like the other _yakuza_ she must have met in her lifetime. However, I knew I wouldn't be telling the truth. After all, what had I been doing in the past few months besides accumulating land and fame in such a sleazy under-handed way? I was no better than the people she's accusing me of being. My only claim to goodness was proving that I had no intention of killing her grandfather if I could help it.

I looked up to meet Akatsuchi's eyes in the rear-view mirror. There was a hint of understanding there, but at the same time a fierce loyalty to the woman beside me.

"She is right you know," he finally said quietly as he wove his way in and out of lanes expertly. "Gramps really has been a tough nut to crack over the years despite the threats made to him by the Syndicates. They've destroyed many homes and families he once looked after all in their effort to get to him, and yet day after day, he continues to fight for legislature to nullify the power of the Underworld. He knows his days are numbered, but he's not afraid of dying for what he believes in." The big man gave a semblance of a smile. "I don't know why he wants to meet you, but even looking at you, I think I sense a goodness inside of you, Naruto. You don't seem like a guy who really likes being a _yakuza_, eh?"

I struggled to find a suitable response, but I was saved from doing so as he turned into a much quieter section of the city where the homes were a little more widely-spaced and grand in design. Most were a mixture of modern and traditional, and I was not too surprised to find that the Councilman lived in a grand two-storey mansion; something I noticed most politicians tend to favor. The automatic gates slid open silently though there were two armed guards positioned within the grounds as we drove in.

Beautiful, well-tended lawns dotted with colorful plants and huge trees surrounded the home. There was a large water-fountain with a statue of a mermaid holding a jar, from whence the water flowed from. In the distance, one could make out a lake with two large yachts anchored by the pier. Horses grazed quietly in the backyard giving one the illusion you were in the countryside instead of looking just past the lake to notice the towering concrete buildings of industrialized Japan. The juxtaposition was almost jarring to the senses.

"Here we are," Akatsuchi announced just as the car door on Kurotsuchi's side opened and she leapt out as if her pants were on fire. She hardly looked back to see if I was following, but she probably needn't have bothered as the front door to the house opened to reveal ...Gramps (I'm assuming).

He was incredibly short for one thing with a huge bulbous red nose that seemed to take up most of his face. His bald head glistened beneath the sun and his white Fu Manchu moustache was even more impressive in person. As for clothing, he seemed to favor oversized robes that dragged behind him like a bridal gown. He was leaning on an ornate walking cane, but one ought not be fooled by the hunched figure. It was his eyes that did all the talking, and boy, were they scrutinizing me like hell. I felt vulnerable, naked, and completely weak in his presence for some reason, and I could see how he would be a formidable opponent for anyone. After all, this guy had probably survived numerous attacks on his life over the years. He could probably take me down with his walking cane if he wanted.

"You look different from what I imagined," he finally quipped in a loud, but raspy voice that left no room for argument. "Why do you look like one of those over-tanned girls from Harajuku? Itachi said you were blond and had scars on your face."

"Ah...sorry..."

Blushing darkly, I began to peel off the mask, wincing as some parts of it seemed determined to remain glued to my skin. It was a damn relief when the whole thing was finally off (as well as my black wig). I felt I could breathe again.

"Much better," came the grunt as I gave a sheepish smile. Hell, even Akatsuchi (and dare I say Kurotsuchi) seemed to look at me a little differently. Must be the scars.

"Now then. Come with me, Uzumaki Naruto," Gramps ordered as he pounded his walking cane impatiently and began to shuffle, rather quickly, toward the lake. I followed, finding myself having to trot a little to catch up to the little energizer bunny while his wards trailed after us muttering things beneath their breath I could not hear.

As for Gramps, he said nothing as he continued to lead the way; not pausing to take a breather until he got to edge of the lake where several ducks quacked on by lazily with no care in the world.

"You may sit," came the command that had me looking around stupidly. I figured he wanted me to sit on the ground, until I noticed the hidden stone benches and carved table amongst the sakura trees. Very cozy. I sat across him while the other two seemed more content being bodyguards from a distance.

"You have a beautiful home, Ōnoki-san," I began politely, with what I hoped was a genuine enough smile on my face.

"I know."

Oookay. Guess I should change topics then. Except I was at a loss as to how to begin. He was still staring at me as if I were an object from another planet, and short of squirming in discomfort, I cleared my throat and tried again.

"Um..."

"You don't look that threatening," came the sharp observation that deflated whatever 'tough-guy-image' portrayal I had hoped to convey. "I was given the impression that that imbecile Danzo would send someone more menacing. I had no idea he would send over the son of Minato."

My eyes widened as my heart slammed within my chest. "You...you knew my father?" I squeaked breathlessly.

"Briefly," Ōnoki remarked with a snort. "He was in the company of the Bakufu Syndicate's _kumichō_ in a meeting a long time ago. Oddly enough, the meeting was a discussion of how the _yakuza_ was to integrate with the government to become a more legitimate organization. Ironic, isn't it? I always knew Tsubasa was a level-headed man. It was unfortunate that Danzo had him destroyed for his gain."

"He killed my father too."

"Who? Ikegami?"

"No...Danzo."

Ōnoki gave another snort and tapped his cane on the ground. "Why is that not surprising. So let me guess...you are here to seek your revenge on your father's death by working for the very enemy, weeding your way through the Syndicate and destroying it from the inside?"

I smiled bitterly. "You read me too easily."

"Foolish young one," Ōnoki retorted with a shake of his head. "Any fool can see that. If they looked beyond the surface. So...Danzo has no idea you are Minato's son?"

"Oh, I think he knows. He just doesn't know that I know he's the one responsible for my father's death. He still believes I'm in the dark about everything that happened in the past. To him, I'm nothing more than unfinished business. Once he's in power, I'm sure he'll do all he can to take me out as well."

"How did you come to know about your father's demise?"

"Didn't Itachi tell you?" I raised a brow, watching him carefully. His expression gave nothing away.

"I would rather hear it from your mouth, boy. Now talk."

Taking a deep breath, I regaled him with the tale of the dossier given to me by Itachi and Shisui while in Buk-gu. I mentioned finally getting to meet Jiraiya and everything else in-between, not sure why the hell I was pouring out the sordid details to this guy I have just met. For all I knew, he could turn around and stab me in the back, but somehow...I knew he wouldn't. Guys like Ōnoki were a rare breed; tough nuts that stuck to their guns and wouldn't back down no matter what. I could come to trust a man like him.

Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Kurotsuchi – who was sitting on the pier– watching me intensely. When she noticed I had caught her gaze, she gave a rather pretty blush and huffed before turning away as if annoyed.

_Heh._

In fact...the more I stare at her profile, the more she reminds me of Sas -

"Never did trust that Jiraiya," came the sudden sharp retort that broke me out of my slight daydream. I focused on the old man with a light frown. Was he aware of something that I didn't know? "He was a 'good' boss as far as I could tell, but that doesn't mean he wasn't just as greedy as the others. What's his role in all of this?"

"My mentor...for the most part. I'm going to make him in charge of everything once I take out Ikegami...or better yet, I plan to change the very concept of the _yakuza_ into something new."

Ōnoki looked as if he had swallowed a canary. His features contorted for a second before he burst out into the loudest laughter in the history of mankind. It was the kind of laughter that made you wish you could start digging a hole to bury yourself into.

"Haha!" Ōnoki slapped his thigh and shook his head. "That is the best thing I've heard in years. In fact, the best thing I've heard since your naïve father suggested the very same thing! You really are the son of Namikaze Minato if you believe something that imprudent."

"What's so foolish about it?" I retorted angrily. I wished he'd stop laughing already. It wasn't that funny for fuck's sake. "You've been fighting with them for years and yet you don't stop because you believe something like that is possible, isn't it?"

"You fool! I am not trying to destroy the establishment itself," he snapped back with a wave of his hand. "The mafia is not something unique to Japan, remember? So even if we did make them legitimate, we have to deal with the Triads from China, Taiwan, Hong Kong, the mobs from Russia, Italy and the Americas, who will all want to grab a piece of the pie." He suddenly sighed and his shoulders seemed to slump giving one the impression of a man who had so many burdens to bear.

"My young one...do not think you are the only one who had such lofty goals. When I was your age, I felt the same thing too." He gave a pained smile. "My father was so much in debt with the _yakuza_, I lived every day of my young life waiting for the day they'd finally get tired of our existence and kill us all. I was in a difficult position, between the need to reform and yet destroy them all by any means necessary. However, what could I do besides get myself arrested or killed if I resorted to petty gun or sword fights with them? What good would that do for my goals? How else could I make a difference in our country without resorting to unnecessary bloodshed?"

"Politics...?"

He nodded. "Politics. If I couldn't fight them on the streets, I could at least deal with them with new laws and stricter regulations to keep them in check. And for a while it worked...at least until they began to buy off many of my fellow councilmen. You have no idea how infuriating it was to watch men I had spent years working with suddenly do a 180 all in their quest to become wealthier. The DIET became nothing more than a cesspool for corruption and sin, and the few who dared to stand against the desecration of our sacred system of law and order in this country...were gunned down or brutally murdered."

He rose to his feet and paced away from me, and in that strong yet weary profile, I felt my heart ache for this man.

"Some days I want to give up and throw in the towel, Uzumaki Naruto. Some days it just becomes all too much, but then I look at my dear ones..." He turned a little to give a rare but warm smile to Akatsuchi and Kurotsuchi, who both suddenly looked as if they were about to burst into tears. "I think of Itachi, Shisui and all those young men and women who fight day after day in the shadows to restore Japan to its former glory, and I realize I cannot back down now. No way. No how." He spun around to face me; the gritty determination back on his features.

"And now Shimura Danzo wants me dead, and though I was vehemently against Itachi and Shisui's plan, I realize that this is something that must be done. So fine. I will let you kill me...or not kill me, so your hands remain clean. The plan is for me to be poisoned in my office tomorrow morning, where my secretary will find me unconscious. I will be rushed to the hospital where I will be pronounced dead within the hour. The media will carry this all over the news - as they should - and with any hope you will no longer be required to carry out your assassination. Councilman Sagara has left the country as we speak, something I'm sure Danzo would be updated about eventually."

"Whoa...wait a minute now." I rubbed my temple to make sense of this. "If you die...how the hell will you come back again? I mean...your seat at the DIET and -"

"Consider this my retirement," Ōnoki replied with a quirk of his lips that wasn't quite a smile. "I have worked for this country for over fifty years and it's time I leave it up to you young ones to lead us to the promised land...so to speak. I am more than content moving to the countryside and raising a small farm with my family – and away from all the madness. So yes, it isn't exactly the way I had planned my retirement party, but I might as well leave in style, don't you agree?"

I would have replied, if there wasn't this damn lump suddenly stuck in my throat. I settled for simply nodding and inwardly cursing out Danzo for doing this to a man who deserved so much more.

A low sniffle and softly-spoken words forced me to look up at the two people hugging each other. Kurotsuchi was the one crying and Akatsuchi (with tears in his eyes) was doing his best to comfort his best friend.

"What are two goons sniffling for?" came the loud bark that had us looking up with mild surprise. "You're already crying, and I'm not even dead yet!"

"It's a stupid plan, Grandpa!" Kurotsuchi snapped back, and I could definitely see how they were related. Short fuses must run in the family. "Why do you have to follow Itachi's plan and drink that stupid potion?!"

"Oh? You'd rather I get shot by a gun and hope it doesn't hit any vital organs? At least you have the antidote, don't you?"

"I don't want to go through all that!" Kurotsuchi wailed. "Why do I have to mock bury you and go through that funeral procession just so you can...!"

I tuned out their quarrel and looked out to the lake, my mind whirling with all that I had heard from Ōnoki so far. I longed to tell Shikamaru everything I had heard, but the old man wouldn't let me leave until I had shared dinner with his family. Turned out to be a great meal, and Kurotsuchi was half-nice to me even.

"Hopefully we will meet again soon," Akatsuchi said as I said my farewells. "And we will share a bottle of _sake_, eh?"

"I'd like that," I replied with a smile and a firm handshake. "Take care of the old man and Kurotsuchi, all right? I'll check up on you all every now and then."

The big guy grinned. "So you do like her, eh?"

I felt my cheeks flame with embarrassment. I couldn't tell him that it was only because she sort of reminded me of a guy, so I simply shrugged and tried to act bashful. "Well, she is cute..."

"Haha! She likes you too, I think...well without that mask on your face. Just don't forget us or her when you have completed your revenge, Naruto. We'll always be here for you, okay?"

Something about those words brought another hard lump to my throat, and since I didn't want to start bawling in front of the guy, I made my escape as quickly as possible. And though it was late, I still had to make one last pit stop before heading back to the hotel. Those two were likely to start making out if I didn't show up soon.

"You're late," Shikamaru greeted when I showed up at the inn nearly an hour later. He looked like he was ready for bed since he was clad in only a casual _yukata._

"The taxi driver lost his fucking way," I replied as I shoved past him, took off my shoes and padded into the waiting private lounge room. Temari was there, looking even more beautiful than the last time I saw her, which seemed like years ago. Dressed in a pretty pastel kimono with embroidered swans, with her blond hair tied up with what looked like decorative chopsticks, she looked every bit the blushing bride. Except this was no wedding.

"You look good enough to eat," I complimented with a wink as I knelt to place a kiss on her cheek. She swatted me away playfully and made a face.

"You look weird with that mask on," she replied with a smile. "Take it off, so I can see that handsome mug of yours."

"Rwwr. Keep talking like that, sweetheart, and I'm likely to steal you away from that man of yours."

"Keep inflating his damn ego and he's likely to puff off like a hot air balloon," Shikamaru retorted as he sat beside his woman and tried to glare at me while I peeled off the mask for the second time today. I did manage to give him the middle finger in retaliation.

"Have you had dinner?" Temari asked after rolling her eyes at our antics. "We could order something..."

I shook my head and patted my stomach, before flinging the mask to the side and breathing again. "Just stuffed myself at the councilman's house."

"How did that go?" Shika asked.

Leaning against the wall and stretching out my legs, I told them everything. Temari, whose office wasn't too far from Ōnoki's at the DIET building, and who had already been briefed on the plan for his 'death', nodded at those parts in agreement. When I was through, Shikamaru gave a light grunt and mimicked my sitting position.

"Seems like he's come to peace with himself about everything."

"Just about," I agreed quietly. I allowed my gaze to drift out the opened screen doors leading to a quaint _koi_ pond and sand garden just a few steps away. "I don't know...when he said that he was leaving everything up to us...I suddenly felt that this whole thing we're doing...it's even more _real_, you know what I mean?"

I turned to them and felt my heart lurch with an emotion I knew as unconditional love and admiration. Even though they had been forced apart by circumstances beyond their control, even now that they could only meet under difficult and dangerous times, their body language told of a completely different story. With her head upon his shoulder, their hands clasped tightly in that subtle but loving gesture most couples shared, I could honestly say I wished nothing but happiness for these two for the rest of their lives.

(I want you two as far away from what is to come)

"It's always been real," Temari finally said quietly; her pale blue eyes trained on me with a warmth that was borderline maternal in nature. "We've just been shielding ourselves from the reality for so long while we were in Buk-gu, that now...it's slowly becoming as overwhelming as its always been." She glanced up to Shikamaru with a small smile on her face. "And we know our role in all of this, Naruto. As much as I'm sure you want Shikamaru and I to leave and go as far away from this as possible...we can't. This is a decision we've already made, and you're stuck with us whether you like it or not."

"I hate you guys," I croaked and tried to snort in derision, but all I ended up doing was choking up like a damn kid. I really was lucky to have such awesome friends.

"So...you still plan on going to meet Simizutani tomorrow night?" Shika asked quietly.

"Don't have a choice, do I?" I replied with a weary sigh. "I promised the guy I'd be there, and I have to. Besides..." I looked to Temari with a clasp of my hands as if about to pray to her, which I might as well be. She was the messenger of good or bad news after all. "Please, please, please, _please_ tell me he's here."

She chuckled and I felt my heart leap into my throat in excitement.

"Weeeeeeeell..." she drawled lazily.

"You're torturing me here!" I wailed and threw myself at her, earning helpless giggles as she tried to push me away, while Shika threatened to blow my brains off if I didn't stop harassing his girlfriend.

"Damn! Let me talk, Naruto!" she gasped and finally pulled away with a hand upon my face to stop me from coming any closer. "He's here...in my purse."

"Huh?"

I lowered her hand to stare in bemusement. "What the fuck does that mean?"

I honestly did suddenly imagine a miniature Sasuke tucked into her purse...

However, her smile this time was all it took to let me know that I was too late. _Fuck!_

"They left two days ago," she said quietly. "But...not before he left a little something for you." She dragged the black purse closer and dug through it for a while before pulling out the small cassette tape. "A message from the man himself. He said you had better listen to every damn thing he has to say or else."

I could feel my cheeks burn at the warning, definitely picturing Sasuke's stern voice as he gave this order. The tape was like fire in my palm, and I wanted nothing more than to run back to my hotel room right this very second and listen to it over and over and over again until I wore it out.

"...will station ourselves at the Imperial Hotel just in case."

"Wh...what was that?" I asked in a voice that was slightly breathless, embarrassed to realize I had spaced out again and completely missed what Shika was talking about.

Temari snickered as Shika rolled his eyes in exasperation. "Good grief, man. I know you want to go back to the hotel, but just wanted to remind you that Shichi, Yottsu and I will be stationed at the Imperial across from your rendezvous with Simizutani just in case anything happens, all right?"

"Ah...right...well..."

"Oh for God's sake, I'll call you a fucking taxi," Shika snapped as Temari laughed herself senseless and I wished I hadn't been born.

Damn my libido.

* * *

><p>Sneaking back into my hotel was no problem, and after a thorough survey of my room to make sure nothing had been taken or any bugs activated while I was gone, I took a quick shower and flopped onto the narrow bed in only my pjs bottoms; headphones and cassette already plugged in and ready to go.<p>

_Hah._ Funny how one regresses to a lovesick moron the moment he's 'close' to the person he really cares about. Although I wasn't sure how well that could be applied to a taped recording. Either way, it was better than nothing. Hell, even a damn picture of the guy would work just about now.

At first all I heard was nothing but static and then the opening line that was so _him_, it had me biting my lower lip to control myself from laughing or sobbing or both.

"This is so stupid," Uchiha Sasuke greeted me from a thousand miles away. "Why the fuck do I have to record this in the first place?"

"Because you fucking have to," I replied to the empty room, aware that I was now smiling like a fool, and damn if my heart wasn't doing the tango with excitement. I swear, I really am such a -

"I hope you're alone listening to this because I swear if that other man is with you...great...now I'm making threats that I can't carry out. Fucking...hate...this..." His voice trailed off and this time there was no controlling the laughter.

(Oh God! I love you, man. I really do...)

Wait..._what...?_

"All right...let's do this, seriously," his voice returned stronger and more in control. I could hear shifting noises in the background which let me know that he had probably recorded this while lying in bed as well. Or sitting up. No matter though. Just hearing that deep voice, that was akin to being coated with something warm and syrupy, had me lowering my lashes (and trying my best to ignore the nagging little feeling at the back of my mind at just what I had thought earlier).

"First things first and let's get this out of the way..." Deep breath. "I...uh...I...I miss you, all right? More than I thought I would. Although, to be honest, there's been a lot going on over here with getting to meet all the members of Akatsuki and having to go through special training all over again. Do you know that there are many members of the Watchdogs who defected Orochimaru's army? I couldn't believe the number of officers, who were under the my watch, suddenly show up to pledge their allegiance to our new cause. And there's no fear of them being spies because Shisui put them through rigorous interrogation procedures including some kind of truth serum that causes people to blurt out their innermost secrets. I swear that guy worries me sometimes...but Itachi must really see something in him because they're still a couple."

Another soft sigh. "Speaking of which, Itachi never told me he had contacted you even when I pestered him about you several times. I mean I understand that he's trying to protect me and keep my mind focused on what we're about to get into, but he should have at least told me that you were alive and well. I was worried to death about you, not knowing where you were or how you were holding up being transformed into a hardened criminal – I mean faux _yakuza_ – so you can imagine how pissed off I became when I eavesdropped on a conversation he was having with Shisui one night and heard them talking about you! Urgh. I was this close to murdering someone, but I controlled myself. Still, I must admit hearing that you've changed was a bit...troubling to me. I mean, I'm not expecting you to still be as goofy and moronic as you used to be..."

_Moronic? The hell!_

"...but I just..." His voice seemed to fade a little as he continued. "I just didn't want you to completely lose your humanity, Naruto. That's the one thing about you that's made me the person I am today. If that side of you went away...how can I ever hope to recapture him again? I am more than aware of the difficult position you've found yourself in and how it's bound to be impossible to retain your 'goodness' in the presence of so much wickedness and sin, but...and call it my stupid naïve assumptions – I still think you have the ability to overcome all that. If you could survive the hell of Byaku-Shinkyou and still find it in your heart to give a bastard like me a chance, then I truly believe you can still remain good. You must promise me that if nothing else, Naruto. Or at least listen to this damn tape so you can hear my voice drilling it into your skull until you're sick of it."

_I will...you bet your annoying, snotty, but damn lovable attitude that I will listen for as long as it takes. _

"We're heading off to Hokkaido tomorrow. It's going to be a long journey, but I'll be thinking of you all the way there." A low groan. "Can I tell you something? That my stomach is all in tight knots and it feels like I'm constipated and I can't breathe just at the notion of even being close to that son of a bitch again? I swear I had to run to the bathroom to throw up a few times because it was that bad, Naruto. Perhaps it's finally sinking in – after all those years – of just how much Orochimaru affected me psychologically. It's not something you can just get over in a few months, no matter how 'changed' you think I've become. There are still moments I find myself thinking like him...moments where that side of me you hated so much threatens to rise to the surface especially when some of the Akatsuki members slack off during training or I watch the ex-officers. There is still this inherent need to please him in some way; that child within me that knew no better and believed that Orochimaru was everything. When I tend to think in such a way, I have to mentally slap myself and remember where I am again. I have Itachi – my brother – back from the dead. I have Shisui – a fellow Uchiha though I had once thought we were a dying breed – protecting me as best he can. I have Haku – who by the way is back to good health and can't wait to see you again...and yes, I know you're probably smiling right now as I say this, and no, I am not going to allow him to leave you a taped message either. I'm still in competition with him, remember?"

I blushed at the low chuckle to fill my ears, turning onto my stomach to not only hide my heated features into the pillow, but to control the growing ache between my legs. Listening to his voice has not been helping matters, I can assure you of that.

"Still...he's doing fine all things considered and I'm more than happy to have him by my side. However..."

And though I couldn't see him, I could still picture how this part must have been recorded for his voice sounded muffled and low, as if he too had been curled into his pillow almost ashamed to admit he had actually said this into the machine.

"...knowing I have you waiting for me, Naruto...makes everything seem so much more bearable. So please...even if you do manage to finally give in to temptation, for even I know how difficult it is to remain celibate in such a climate – Akatsuki does have its fair share of beautiful women...and some rather fine men...and you have no doubt been accosted by men and women alike either to get into your pants, please do not forget the promise you made to me in Buk-gu. Even if my body or yours is being used to satiate the pleasures of the flesh, your heart remains and belongs to me for all eternity. You know you already have mine; a measly compensation for my many sins against you."

_My heart..._

"So I'll sign off now..."

_My heart..._

"...and hope and pray that you will be successful in all your endeavors."

His voice was raspy...thick...holding back...

(shit!)

"And...um...well...be safe and don't die until I get to see you again. I promise not to get into trouble as well, all right? Take care of yourself for me, Naruto. I...I...I..."

(my heart...)

"...can'twaittoseeyousoongoodbye."

The loud click and subsequent static was the final straw. If it was the combination of an emotional day and now having to listen to Sasuke's words causing this to happen, then I was powerless to stop it anyway. The tough-guy-façade had been effectively been stripped away, and for now, the very _human_ Naruto was nothing more than a sobbing mess clutching a recorder to my chest as if my very life depended on it.

For if I ever needed a reason to justify why I was going through all of this pain and heartache, all I had to listen to _his_ voice as a reminder of just what I was truly fighting for...

...a country we could call our own with pride and the freedom it so richly deserved.

_(a life where we could live in peace with the happiness we both truly desire)_

I knew now what I had so obviously tried to ignore and set aside for so long; that my desperate attempts to protect my heart from suffering through the anguish of losing Sakura and never wanting to give in to that fickle emotion called 'love' was coming back to bite me in the ass even harder than ever before. That it would take this man to change my mind would have been laughable less than a year ago, but now...all I could wish and hope was that we'd both live long enough so I could get to tell it to his face no matter how embarrassing it was bound to be.

Besides, if he rejected me or laughed in my face, I'd probably have to kick his ass (and then join a monastery).


	39. 39: The Ties that Bind

**Notes:** Whoohoo! Hello all ye lovely folks! And to my newest readers who are enjoying the story so far. Thank you, thank you, thank you as always for your commentary/feedback! *bows gratefully* The fun is officially about to begin, so hold on to your underwear boys and girls. Happy reading! :D

**P.S:** Again, I sincerely apologize for all the typos you might notice. Gah! I went back to read some old chapters and just about wept with some of the things I saw. Thank you for being troopers and sticking through them. I try to be extra careful, but ...some just fall right through the cracks. *lol*Anyway...enjoy! *runs off*

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><p><strong>Chapter 39<strong>

**The Ties that Bind**

In this ancient house,  
>Paved with a hundred stones,<br>Ferns grow in the eaves;  
>But numerous as they are,<br>My old memories are more.

-**Emperor Juntoku**

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><p><em>Sasuke:<em>

_The _bhavana is_ mental culture in the full sense of the term. It aims at cleansing the mind of impurities and disturbances, such as lustful desires, hatred, ill-will, indolence, worries and restlessness, skeptical doubts, and cultivating such qualities as concentration, awareness, intelligence, will, energy, the analytical faculty, confidence, joy, tranquility, leading finally to the attainment of highest wisdom which sees the nature of things as they are, and realizes the Ultimate Truth, Nirvana._

I lowered the pamphlet to my lap, unable to stop the small twitch of an ironic smile forming on my lips as the words continued to scream within my mind. In the past, the holier-than-thou version of me would have been wringing his hands in consternation at how far from grace he had fallen. My skin would be crawling with unseen filth, eager to seek the nearest temple to soak and wash away my iniquities. Ah, but how things had changed, for all I felt at this time was nothing; simply a void of emptiness deliberately kept that way to prepare me for what was ahead.

_A cleansed mind free of impurities and disturbances? Hah._

Who needed a cheap pamphlet, from wandering monks at the train station, to convince me that I was bound straight for Hell anyway?

The sudden dull 'thud' as a head slumping against my shoulder, reminded me that I was not alone. Haku's fast asleep beside me, a plain brown blanket wrapped around him in protection against the elements both in and outside. Some fool must have forgotten to send the memo to the train conductors or supervisors (or whoever ran this thing) that we'd need heat within the cabins. The end result? Most of us all bundled in extra jackets or wrapped in blankets to protect us from catching severe colds or pneumonia before the war even starts.

The seats across us were empty as I had neither courted nor entertained anyone to share it with us. However, I still had a good view of the other occupants in my cabin. Hinata and Karin were snuggled together in seats across the aisle - fast asleep - while Tenten seemed to be reading a book beneath the dull glow of the cabin lamps. Lee snored lightly with his mouth slightly agape, his body cocooned in a blanket as well. Shino...it was hard to tell if he was asleep or awake - thanks to his (prescription) sunglasses - and with his arms folded across his chest and his head covered in that familiar black hoodie, he appeared to be on his guard at all times. Sasori – ever quiet and pensive – could be asleep, but I could not tell from here. All I saw was his familiar shock of red hair from my vantage point. Deidara was still wide awake and appeared to be sketching something – a talent I came to discover and one he seemed surprisingly bashful about. I did recall him stating that once this 'shit' (aka war) was over, he was going back to Art College to complete his education. Oddly enough, I found myself wishing his dream would come true despite his annoying tendencies.

_I wish all their dreams will come true...if we make it out alive._

Odd. Perhaps it was a sign of weakness or this side of me that has come to empathize with humanity a little more. That I would concern myself with these people's back stories and want them to succeed and live happier lives? I could almost laugh.

_Why? _whispered the tiny voice within me as I turned my gaze out the window to stare at the bleak frozen landscape that wheezed by._ Why is it funny that you've found your humanity at last?_

_Because I'm returning to a place where it was lost in the first place,_ I replied with my fingers tightening around the pamphlet._ Deep down...I fear that seeing Byaku-Shinkyou again will bring back all those dark emotions I had before._

_(But you've changed, haven't you? It's been almost a year since you left...you've changed...things have changed. You are going back to redeem yourself and to reclaim what is rightfully yours. It's something you've thought and dreamed about for so long. Now that it's here...why do you doubt?)_

_It's like I told Naruto in the recording – that somewhere within me, there is this black mass that still pulsates with Orochimaru's influence. That no matter how hard I try to be 'good' and 'normal' to the rest of the world, I'll always have this part of me ready to rear its ugly head again. The last thing I want to do is go back there, but I am petrified._

My fingers dug into my flesh, and for an instant, a crushing sensation flooded my chest, as if something or someone was sitting on it. Breathing...breathing was...breathing was become a little...diff...difficult...

_Even if you return,_ the voice (which now sounded eerily like my mother for some reason) continued,_ it's going to be different. Look at all these people with you now. You must remember that you are no longer alone in this fight. Itachi has returned from the 'dead' and he will always be by your side. You are no longer alone, Sasuke. Remember...you have people who care about you now...people who genuinely love and appreciate you for who you are and not what you can bring to the table. Pure and good intentions...no ulterior motives whatsoever. You are no longer alone...you are no longer alo -_

"Are you all right?"

I gasped and sat up with a jerk, causing Haku to moan in slumber before (mercifully) twisting positions to make himself more comfortable on the other side of his seat. However, the voice had come from the figure towering over us. It was Hyūga Neji, who must have just returned to the cabin, since I hadn't noticed him during my observations earlier.

In the relative gloom around us, I must say those pale eyes of his stood out like translucent beacons, which could be quite disconcerting (and creepy). Like me, he seemed to prefer being in traditional garb, as his black _yukata_ contrasted sharply against his pale skin. He must not be feeling the cold either, for unlike the others, he wasn't donning an extra jacket or shawl around his shoulders. His _katana_ was in place within his _obi_, and I idly wondered if he slept with the damn thing on. He never seemed to be without it.

"I'm fine," I finally replied with a light shrug, which I hoped he'll take as a sign that I was not in the mood for any sort of conversation. Not that he has gone out of his way to court it. As I must have said before, we have a cordial and respectful relationship, and I hated to admit that the more time I spent with him, the more he reminded me of myself. Aloof (except when in the company of Hinata, Lee and Tenten for obvious reasons), curt and straightforward for the most part, and prone to letting his sword do the talking for him. In fact, it seemed like a running joke amongst everyone that we could be twins.

(not in this lifetime...or the next for that matter)

He nodded curtly and turned as if to head to his seat when something outside the window caught his attention.

"Hmm...snow..." I think he muttered.

"What?"

He cocks his head toward the window. "It's beginning to snow."

I looked out to see what he was talking about, and sure enough a steady stream of snowflakes filtered down from the heavens to blanket the ground. I would consider the sight beautiful, if there wasn't something quite ghostly about it. Besides, if my deductions were correct, there'd probably be at least two to three inches when we arrived in a couple of hours.

All things considered, the snow could be good camouflage...IF one was prepared to use it wisely. Luckily, Itachi and Shisui were able to obtain white robes we could use to disguise ourselves and blend in effortlessly with the surroundings. However, I was quick to remind them that the Watchdogs also had white camouflage uniforms. Those were rarely used and the only time I'd seen them worn was by special troops who patrolled the mountains every now and then. Who were we to think that Orochimaru wouldn't want his army to be just as 'hidden' as we planned to be?

As if that wasn't bad enough, fighting in the thick of winter was also going to be a disadvantage. It's no fun trying to dig your way through piles of the stuff and getting wedged within frozen mounds while trying to disarm your enemy at the same time. To be honest, I'd never fought in such conditions before, and though Shisui and Kurobachi had promised to give us a crash course training at our destination, it was still going to be difficult getting adjusted to all this.

"How bad does it get?" came the quiet question that jarred me from my thoughts.

I frowned, wondering why he was suddenly insisting on talking to me. "What are you talking about?" I asked with a raised brow.

"The weather," he explained as he folded his arms across his chest. He seemed to have an eye on the weather and the other trained on me at the same time. "You've lived up here most of your life, right? How bad does it get?"

I debated on whether to give him a curt response of "it depends" or to elaborate further –

_(they are on your side, Sasuke. Do not forget...)_

"It can get rough," I said aloud. "Once – about five years ago or so - we got snowed in and nothing functioned around the grounds much. Must have been at least eight or ten inches by the time the storm was over."

He whistled beneath his breath and furrowed his brows. "Let's pray it doesn't get that bad. Most of us here haven't had any experience fighting in such conditions." He eyed me thoughtfully. "You should have no problem."

"I haven't fought in such conditions either," I replied before I could control myself. Unfortunately, the last thing I wanted to display was my disadvantage, and as much as I expected him to gloat at this revelation, all he did was nod as if in understanding.

"Figures..."

"What does that mean?"

He rolled his eyes to the heavens as if exasperated. "This. All of this. None of us have been in war before, you know. You read about it in the newspapers and watch it on T.V. or in the movies and it all seems so distant and unreal. However...we're about to get into it, and I have to remind myself that I might not make it through...I might not get to see any of my friends again when this is all over."

My lips curled in a sneer. "You regret being here then?"

"Far from it," he replied with a twitch of his lips as if smirking. "This is a fight for a worthy cause. I have never believed in the absolute power and authority of the military and this Orochimaru – from all I've heard – sounds like a guy who really does need to get his ass kicked. I'd love to have the pleasure of doing so, but from the sound of things...you should have the honor."

"Naturally."

The smirk widened. "As morbid as contemplating death seems...I really do want to make it out of here in one piece. I've got way too much at stake when this is all over."

I noticed the surreptitious glance he directed in Hinata's direction, and again I found myself wondering just how close/intimate those two were. I knew they were not brother and sister, but it was still slightly disturbing that he'd entertain being in such a relationship with –

"She deserves a peaceful and happy life," he was saying, which forced me to pay attention. "Hinata and I come from a large family, and though she's been touted – from the day she was born – as the next head of the Hyūga clan, as you must have noticed, she's not exactly the kind of person eager to take on such a burden. With so much pressure to be something she isn't, she finally ran away from home and has been running ever since." He sighed and tugged absently at the yukata's sash. "I was sent to bring her back to the family, but it's been almost three years since that assignment was given." He gave me a bitter smile. "She told me she had found a family with the Akatsuki organization; a place where she could be appreciated for her talents and not forced to be anything she wasn't. She convinced the cynical me to live a life without rules and boundaries, and now...look at us. I have made good friends who will give up their lives for me if asked, and we have all made a vow to create a better future than the past has given to us so far."

He stopped talking as if shocked he's told me so much. I assumed he'll want to excuse himself, but he shrugged and eyed me warily again. "I know you're going back to settle an old score...but then what, Uchiha Sasuke? Is that all you're really fighting for? Just a chance to take over as head of the military again? Is there true meaning to all of this besides it being a 'duty' to your clan's history and integrity?"

I was helpless to the initial bristle at his seemingly condescending statement, but as I digested his words, the more it made sense and did leave me slightly conflicted. Yes, I was returning to get rid of Orochimaru and to, technically, purify a place so tainted with sin, it was literally covered in an unseen black cloud of filth. And yet, at the back of my mind, there was yet another unfinished business...something ten times more important than simply eliminating an unnecessary evil.

_(what kind of a life will you live when this is all over, Sasuke? Simply living day to day running Byaku-Shinkyou?)_

"No..." I whispered more to myself and completely forgetting Neji's presence. "I am not simply doing this for myself or any selfish desires as you might assume."

"I assumed no such thing," Neji's voice filtered through my thoughts. "I guess to put it more bluntly, is there anyone you wish to share your future with in this new world you plan to create?" He nodded at Haku. "What about him? Will he continue to be by your side until his dying day? Will he not want to explore the world and decide what his future holds for him? Do you believe Itachi and Shisui will remain with you at Byaku-Shinkyou? Surely you don't believe they'll want anything to do with it considering the kind of life they live. They are more than content to let you run things while they show up whenever you need them -"

"You've said quite enough," I cut in impatiently, this time making sure he saw my frown of displeasure. Who the hell gave him the right to lecture me on what plans I might have for the future? What was he? A soothsayer?

"Pardon me," he said with his hands raised as if surrendering, though his features were anything but apologetic. If anything, he seemed satisfied that he had achieved something. What that was, I'm not quite sure. "I'll take my leave."

As he turned away, I was tempted to blurt out that just like him, I _did_ have other dreams besides the obvious. This dream involved a certain blond hundreds of miles away, who might (or might not) be currently laughing himself silly over a ridiculous taped recording I had done in the heat of the moment. Well, to be honest, it had taken several hours of inner debating – though it was Temari who had suggested I do it in the first place – before I finally conceded. It was poor compensation for actually talking to Naruto face-to-face, but it was considerably better than nothing at all. Even thinking about it now still had my face suffusing with color, and I was never more glad that Neji chose this time to leave me in peace.

Unfortunately, that was shattered quickly as the cabin door suddenly opened and Shisui poked his head in.

"You busy?" he asked, and hardly waiting for me to respond, he motioned for me to follow him. "Itachi wants you."

"What's wrong?" I queried as I jumped to my feet in haste. I could feel the gazes of those still awake, watching us as we left; their curiosities no doubt piqued at what this meeting could entail.

"Nothing much. He just wanted to keep up abreast of a few things," Shisui explained as we headed down the narrow corridor and into another cabin that was much smaller and had somehow been transformed into an office of sorts. Itachi, with dark circles around his eyes (a clear sign my brother's been putting in some extra long hours), was sitting behind a desk filled with blueprints and maps that looked confusing at first glance. Kurobachi, Touya, and two other senior officers had their heads together in a conference. They only stopped long enough to acknowledge my arrival before turning back to their tasks.

"Sorry if I woke you from sleep," Itachi muttered with a small smile, as he motioned for me to sit across him...if I could find the damn chair in all this chaos that is.

"I wasn't sleeping," I replied, while pushing off some more maps off the single chair I finally found, before sitting on it. "What's going on?"

"Just got off the phone with Temari," he said with an expression that could be interpreted as satisfaction. "Looks like the meeting between Ōnoki and Naruto went as planned."

I kept my features as neutral as possible, never betraying the sudden skip this damn heart of mine had given at the sound of that name. And I don't mean Ōnoki either.

"That's good to hear," I replied evenly.

(Naruto'sokayNaruto'sokayNaruto'sokayNaruto...)

"Even better is that Ōnoki took our suggestions to heart and has agreed to 'die'. We have already made plans to assist him in his departure into the ether."

"Very poetic," I said dryly. Itachi chuckled at this and scratched the bridge of his nose gently.

"And Danzo?" I continued warily. "When he finds out Ōnoki's gone, you know he'll want to put someone in his place at the DIET."

"All ready taken care of," my brother stated and with a motion of his hand in Shisui's direction, the older man presented a dossier that was pushed in my direction. "In there is the new face of the Democratic Party of Japan. He might be young, but he's already creating ripples across the political world, and he's not particularly easy to sway to the 'dark side', so to speak."

I opened the dossier to this 'wunderkind' and I was far from impressed. For starters, the photograph revealed a man hardly older than myself with short, cropped red hair (akin to Sasori's), facial features that looked anything but inviting – especially with that brazen tattoo etched on his forehead or temple – the heavy dark rings around his eyes and the downturn of lips that seemed to loathe the act of smiling. Further pictures revealed that he wasn't very tall, but he did have an aura that made him stand out in images where he was in the presence of others.

_Gaara ...?_

"That's it?" I asked in bemusement. "Has he no last name?"

Itachi shrugged. "He calls himself that, and everyone else seems fine with it. Besides, if his sister has no qualms about it, why should we?"

"His sister?"

My brother's smile widened. "Temari."

"Huh?" I looked at the photograph again and tried to compare this person to the smiling, blond woman I'd come to know. "They look nothing alike -"

"You could say the same for the man always standing one step behind him in the photographs. Noticed him yet?"

Yes, I had. An older man, slightly taller than Gaara, but with interesting markings on his face. I wasn't sure if that was a fancy tattoo or just some family tradition that required him to have it etched on his skin. "Who is he?"

"Kankurō," Shisui stated. "Temari and Gaara's older brother."

"Lovely. A family affair," I observed dryly, trying my hardest not to roll my eyes at this. "So now what?"

"Gaara begins actively campaigning for Ōnoki's seat," Itachi explained. "He will make his presence known at the 'funeral' and will introduce himself to the nation when he's allowed to speak a few words. Naturally, he'll praise Ōnoki's contributions over the years and endear himself to those who believed in the old man. He's already getting major endorsements from other power players in parliament, and with a final written approval from Seong-gye – you remember him, don't you?"

I nodded. He was the former Prime Minister of South Korea, the one I had the pleasure of meeting when Jiraiya visited us at Buk-gu.

"Yes, with his approval, which would signify international cooperation, Gaara will hopefully solidify his position in the public's consciousness. He will be the one to take over what Ōnoki has been trying to do for years. His voice will be ours in the DIET, and with this war raging on...he will expose the truth for what it is."

"And if Danzo interferes?"

Both Itachi and Shisui exchanged a knowing look between them, before he spoke again. "Well, that's where Naruto has to come in. He has to make sure Danzo never gets his hand on Gaara. With any luck, the old bastard would be dead by then or rotting in a dungeon somewhere."

"Gaara will be communicating with several daimyōs to bring them up to date on what's about to happen. Though they are more figureheads than anything, some of them do have the ability to influence their councilmen in parliament."

"That's foolish," I interrupted tightly. "Have you forgotten how many of them Orochimaru has in his pockets? None of them will be on our side!"

"Not without incentives," Shisui insisted with a grim smile. "They can be bought at the right price, and if they realize that Orochimaru is fighting a losing battle, you can be sure they'll be the first to deflect. They are nothing but a bunch of spineless cowards, wouldn't you agree?"

My tongue felt heavy and bitter as the memories of the many parties Orochimaru would throw just to host those greedy, fat, ugly bastards, came rushing back with a vengeance. How many whispered conversations, where money was exchanged and insidious promises made, had I been privy to? How many of those slobbering men have begged and whined Orochimaru to help them retain their pitiful seats as figureheads of a tradition long past, while willingly offering their constituents as sacrifices to Gudan? It was enough to make me want to vomit.

"Sasuke..."

"What?" I snapped impatiently, before taking a deep breath as I noticed them (including the other officers) watching me warily. I realized that I was so tense, my shoulders were actually beginning to ache. I hadn't even realized I was clutching the handles of the chair that tightly until I released them slowly (as well as the breath I must have been holding in all this time). "Sorry...just...memories..."

Itachi watched me carefully for a long minute before nodding softly. "I apologize. I'll let you go back to your cabin. Daylight will break soon and you do need to get some rest."

"Same goes for you," I responded with a raised brow. "When was the last time you slept?"

My brother managed a weak laugh. "Don't worry about me. I've gone without sleep for as long as four days in a row and survived. This is nothing."

So he says, but I accepted his order and with a quick bow of farewell to the other men, I excused myself...but don't head straight to my cabin. Instead, I pushed open one of the exit doors, where I was immediately blasted with a mixture of snow, ice, and wind, so intense it took my goddamn breath away. In no time, my bones were chilled and it was all I can do to hang on to the wrought iron railings around the carriage. However, I managed to steady myself after a few minutes of a bizarre balancing act and finally forced myself to look up.

_Starkly...stunning._

That was the view that greeted me once I got my bearings, for though the train was moving quite fast, it was still 'slow' enough for one to admire the surroundings.

In sharp contrast to the hustle and bustle of Tokyo, out here it felt like you were in the middle of literally nowhere, for there was absolutely nothing – no roads, no houses, no woodlands or trees, just a white-coated barren landscape with only ghostly silhouettes of towering mountains in the horizon. The pre-dawn gray heavens, dotted by the falling snow, made it even more melancholy and (somewhat) depressing.

And yet, I was more than aware that I was born and raised in this frozen tundra. What a homecoming.

I wrapped the jacket around me a little tighter and took a deep breath, and as closed my eyes and lifted my head to the heavens, I pretended that the gentle snowflake kisses on my chilling flesh were nothing more than the warm, spiritual ones I so desperately craved from a certain young man miles away from me.

_Be safe, Naruto, _I prayed silently._ Wherever you are...please be safe..._

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><p><strong>Tokyo<strong>

**Tuesday, ****5.15pm**

_"__...standing live in front of the DIET where – as you can see – several ambulances are going by __thanks to the shocking discovery of Councilman Ōnoki's dead body in his office. His secretary, who was just returning from running an errand at the chamber floor, was the first to discover the gruesome sight..."_

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><p><em>"<em>_Breaking news coming to you live from the DIET where the body of revered and well-established councilmember __Iwagakure Ōnoki was found dead in his office at four-fifty-five p.m. We are not quite sure what is the cause of this, but it is safe to say that this shocking incident has sent reverberations all throughout the Japanese government."_

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><p><em>"<em>_Councilman Inoue! Councilman Inoue! Can you tell us what happened?"_

_"__No comment!"_

_"__Where were you when the body was discovered?"_

_"__Please, no comment! Get that camera away from my face!"_

_"__Do you suspect foul play, Council Inoue?!"_

_"__NO COMMENT!"_

* * *

><p><em>"<em>_Oguma-san! Oguma-san! Can you tell us how you found him?"_

_"__My client is distraught and will not be answering any questions at this time."_

_"__She is his secretary, is she not? Was he taking any medications? Did he have a heart attack?!"_

_"__Please, step back...my client will not be speaking to any media at this time. We'll have the lawyers and investigators handle this. Thank you."_

* * *

><p><em>"<em>_...we are just as shocked as you are. Councilman __Ōnoki was a staunch and well-respected member of the parliament and his loss is...stunning to all of us to say the least."_

_"__President Yamamoto! Do you suspect foul play?!"_

_"__Not at this time. Our able police force is working hard to investigate what has taken place today. We all know Councilman Ōnoki was not as young as he used to be, so it is likely something related to a pre-existing medical condition."_

_"__Are you saying it was a heart attack, President Yamamoto?!"_

_"__I am just speculating. As I said, I will l__eave this all to the police to investigate. Thank you. That is all for now!"_

_"__Who will be replacing Councilman Ōnoki's seat?!"_

_"__That is something that we cannot speculate on at this time. The man has hardly been dead for a whole day and you're already asking about his council seat? Good God."_

* * *

><p><em>"<em>_...__we are expecting the Prime Minister to give a public address any moment now. What's that? He's live right now...all right, we are receiving the feed from the Prime Minister's office. Let's go to him now..."_

_"__People of our beloved nation, I come to you tonight with a heavy heart that still grieves at the loss of one of the finest men our country has ever produced. Earlier today, Councilman Iwagakure Ōnoki of the Democratic National Party was found dead in his office of an apparent heart attack. Many of us remember the early days, when Councilman Ōnoki solidified his position in government as a champion of the people. He was always determined to work for equal and civil rights for all, and was a staunch defender of our constitution. No matter what obstacles he faced, he was always determined to fight through it all with guts and glory. He was not a quitter, and I believe that he left us on his own terms. Our hearts go out to his family and closest friends, and we promise to continue the legacy he has left behind."_

* * *

><p><strong>Wednesday, 10.34am<strong>

_**Yoimiuri Shimbun**_

**DEATH OF AN ICON**

**Councilman Iwagakure Ōnoki Found Dead in Office**

The shocking discovery of the respected member of parliament, by his secretary, was no doubt...

* * *

><p><em><strong>Okinawa Times<strong>_

**FOUL PLAY?**

**Rumors Swirl Around Death of Councilman**

Was it simply a heart attack or the work of those who were against the outspoken councilman and his policies? Especially among those in the underworld, Councilman Ōnoki's policies were not popular and it is well-known about his run-ins with the unruly sort. Could it be that his enemies have finally found a way to keep him silent for good? If so, who could be responsible for it...

* * *

><p><em><strong>Sankei Shimbun<strong>_

**POLICE RULE DEATH AS ****NATURAL CAUSE**

**Councilman Ōnoki Suffers Heart Attack**

He was no longer young and at eighty-eight years old, it is likely that the Councilman's heart simply couldn't continue with the grueling schedule it's been put through all these years. He was a ...

* * *

><p><em><strong>Iwate Nippo<strong>_

**NEW KID ON THE BLOCK**

**A New Face Brings Possible Hope and Change to the Parliament**

He's young. He's brilliant, and he's already being touted as the next man capable of filling the enormous shoes Iwagakure Ōnoki left behind. His name? Simply Gaara. Already popular in his local district, Gaara hopes to take his message of hope and change to a parliament stale with the same old politics that has plagued it for years. In a press statement released...

* * *

><p><em><strong>Akahata<strong>_

**A STAR IS BORN?**

**Gaara Makes His Debut**

...in a statement released today, the up-and-coming politician states: "I was a big follower and believer of Ōnoki-sama's doctrines, and believe that most of his policies and ideals for a better Japan can still be achieved. I hope to continue his positive works in any way I can, and look forward to meeting his constituents in the future."

A promise of things to come? You be the judge. It is believed that Gaara will be making an appearance at the funeral at the family's request. It seems he has already received their blessings.

* * *

><p><em>Interesting.<em>

Shikamaru rolled up the newspaper and tucked it beneath his armpit. To say that the last two days had been nothing but a blur of activity and 'excitement' was probably the understatement of the century. With Ōnoki's 'death' the wheels were finally set in motion. Nothing was to hold them back now.

(chilly morning)

He rubbed his gloved hands together and stuck them into the pockets of his jacket, dark eyes scrutinizing the couple engaged in conversation inside the warm and crowded café across the street. He envied their position, but knew it was just another sacrifice he had to make. Every now and then, tendrils of vapor would escape his pursed lips and he wondered just how long he'd have to wait here until he could grab a smoke.

_Come on...hurry...hurry..._

Finally, the two men rose to their feet and shook hands. Shikamaru pushed himself away from the wall and slid on his sunglasses, nodding as the blond made a barely perceivable sign with his fingers.

_Show time._

"Let's go #5. We've got work to do," he said curtly as he spun on his heels to lead the way with his silent companion trotting after him.

Things were definitely getting interesting indeed, for it was time for the Pied Piper – called Shimura Danzo - to finally pay his dues.

* * *

><p><strong>Hokkaido Prefecture <strong>

**Byaku-Shinkyou**

"Where is he?! I demand to speak to him this instant! Get those bloody weapons away from my face! Do you have any idea who I am?!"

Kimimaro sighed and lowered his quill. Great. Just what he didn't want to have to deal with this early in the morning. An irate daimyō probably pissed at not having enough money for his next greed-infested vacation.

"OROCHIMARU! Show your face!"

"Good morning, Hirano-dono," Kimimaro greeted as he stepped into the courtyard with what he hoped was a pleasant enough smile on his features.

As expected, it was indeed the daimyō of the North; a short, stocky man in his mid-fifties who preferred to be draped in gold embroidered robes that trailed after him like a bridal gown. His ceremonial headdress – something all daimyōs wore for special occasions – looked out of place since there was really nothing worth celebrating at this time. His features were flushed from exertion (and probably his fury) which was not helped by the six guards still surrounding him. Kimimaro motioned for them to step back, which they obeyed, although they still kept their spears or katanas trained on him.

"Where is that insufferable nincompoop?!" The daimyō roared as he tried to puff out his chest to look important, despite being considerably shorter than the white-haired man standing before him.

"I beg your pardon?"

"OROCHIMARU!" came the roar of frustration. "Where is he?!"

"If you have anything to say to him, please tell me and I'll -"

"Get away from my sight, you insignificant worm," Hirano sneered impatiently. "I will not leave until I have spoken to Orochimaru in person. Go fetch him this instant! I still wield authority over these regions in case he has forgotten!"

Kimimaro bit his inner cheek until he could feel the well of blood rising. Still, he kept the polite smile on his face and bowed in respect. "I understand, Hirano-dono. If you'll follow me to his ante-chamber, I'll summon him as you request."

"Hmph!"

He stomped past Kimimaro with his nose stuck in the air and a plethora of curses escaping his lips at the same time. Once settled within Orochimaru's chambers, and ordering himself a glass of wine to quench his thirst, he again began barking for Kimimaro to produce the elusive man.

"How dare he keep me waiting?! That man deserves to put out of office for his impudence and rudeness and -!"

"Desire to savor the moment for all its worth?" came the quiet low drawl, which had the daimyō nearly spilling the contents of his golden cup on his fine robes.

Orochimaru slipped out his hiding place behind the thick maroon curtains, a welcoming yet cold smile on his visage as he held out his arms in greeting. Dressed in a velvet black robe today, he appeared even more sinister and translucent to the shocked man before him. This was definitely not the Orochimaru he had seen several months ago. This imposter must be a messenger from the after life.

"Forgive me for keeping you waiting, my dear Lord Hirano. It was not my intention for other important matters have unfortunately, kept me quite busy -"

"I know exactly what those 'important matters' are," the daimyō huffed as he rose to his feet. "How dare you decide to start a war on my land without my permission?! This is preposterous!"

Orochimaru stiffened at this, his eyes narrowing to icy slits as his lips thinned in displeasure. "Ah, I see that word has gotten out about my little rite of passage -"

"RITE OF PASSAGE?!" came the roar of disbelief. "Have you lost your mind?! You are sending over a thousand soldiers to engage in some cockamamie battle over **what** exactly? You are putting the lives of many innocent people in danger! I refuse to allow it!"

"Funny you should say that," Orochimaru said quietly, a black-tipped fingernail tracing the corner of his mouth as if amused at something. "You have always been the champion of the spiritual rites of Gudan over the years...why is this suddenly so different?"

The daimyō's already flushed features seemed to turn purple with indignation. "You fool! Gudan was the purification of CRIMINALS! The undesirables of society...!"

"And so is this!" Orochimaru interrupted with a flourish. He waved his arms above his head, eyes flashing with a brilliant madness that threw the other man off kilter at the sight. "You have hit the nail on the head, my dear one. This war is going to be the mother of all purification rites! To destroy the undesirables of society! To those who wish to oppose the will of God, we will bring justice to them as the Great Book has decreed."

"...you're a mad man," came the whispered words of horror.

"Mad?" Orochimaru lowered his arms, the manic light now dimmed to reveal a look that was nothing short of venomenous. "You storm into my home and dare to call me a mad man after all I have done for you?"

Before the daimyō could move, he found himself nearly lifted off the floor and his air circulation cut off as cold but terribly strong hands wrapped around his meaty neck to begin squeezing.

"You truly are an ungrateful waste of space," Orochimaru drawled, watching dispassionately as the shorter man struggled to release himself, his beady eyes widening...widening...and eventually beginning to roll to the back of his head. "You have eaten in this house, shared my bed with boys young enough to be your grandchildren, begged for money to continue your lavish lifestyle and secure your political seat, and yet you dare to tell me that I am a mad man? You all disgust me."

He literally flung the daimyō away from him, hardly looking back as he heard the man grunt and wheeze in an effort to breathe again.

"Yo...you...you wi...will...pa...pay...fo...for...thi...this!" Hirano wheezed as he struggled to his feet. How embarrassing to be treated in such a manner. "Mee...meeting with the oth...other dai...daimyōs...ki...kick...you...out...of...he...he...here! You'll...se...see!"

He gave a breathless squeak of fear as Orochimaru stopped and spun around to face him again. "Report me to the other daimyōs? Hah...hahahahahah!" His mocking laughter seemed to ricochet off the walls, seeping into the humiliated daimyō's veins and causing him to stumble out of the chamber in haste.

"Yes, run!" Orochimaru taunted after the fleeing figure. "And I urge you to call them all! Call the Prime Minister or even the Emperor! Let the whole world see what I am about to do here! Let them know! I am waiting for them!"

Once the daimyō was nothing more than a speck in the distance, Orochimaru stopped smiling; his features now grim with irritation and simmering fury.

"Kimimaro?" he called out quietly.

"Yes, my Lord?"

"Let's make sure our little friend never makes it to his destination. A little accident should do the trick, don't you think?"

Kimimaro bowed in understanding. "Yes, my Lord."

"And one more thing," Orochimaru added as Kimimaro prepared to leave his presence.

"Yes, my Lord?"

"That young man you have been seeing lately behind my back."

Kimimaro felt his heart all but stop for a minute at the calmly spoken words. It took all of his acting skills to keep his features neutral, but his mouth had become incredibly dry, his head beginning to pound with an ache that was nearly knee-weakening. He watched his master's lips curve into a cruel smile.

"You have two choices, my dear one," came the soft words tinged with unspoken threats. "Either you eliminate him or I order his execution. I cannot have you being so careless, Kimimaro. It breaks my heart. You should know this by now." He gave a dramatic sigh and placed a hand upon his chest. "You have twenty-four hours to carry this out, my love."

And with that terrifying ultimatum, he left the room with only the husk of the man he once knew, frozen in place.

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke:<em>

The heavy clash of steel against steel had me gritting my teeth as he pressed against me with everything he had. For seemingly endless minutes, we were engaged in a stalemate, neither of us wanting to back down. Finally, I dug my feet into the snow to steady myself, and with all the strength I could muster –

"URGH!"

I shoved back and swung as hard as I could, throwing him off balance and sending his katana flying off his hand where it buried itself into the mound of snow several feet away. He tried to scramble after it, but I pinned his arm to the ground with a boot-clad foot and pointed the tip of my sword against his jugular.

"Wouldn't do that if I were you," I breathed thickly. My heart was still racing from adrenaline and exertion. Pitiful that I'd already feel this tired. I knew this was going to be one difficult session all around.

"Not bad," came the approval from a voice above us. "Seems like you're finally getting the hang of fighting in such conditions."

Shisui was perched on the jutting chunk of the mountain, watching as several of us sparred in preparation. Around the soldier and I, were other groups of fighters engaged in sword fights or hand-to-hand combat. We couldn't risk letting the gunfighters practice especially with such clear weather when the sound of their weapons could draw attention to our hiding place.

"Take five," Shisui commanded as he leapt down to join us. The soldier bowed and excused himself, leaving me with the older man, who was kind enough to toss me a towel to wipe off the sweat I had accumulated. Ironic that I'd be this hot despite the below zero temperatures.

"How's your leg holding up?"

I tested it and shrugged. Besides a dull ache, and the fact that my limp was a little more obvious now (having been training for over two hours already), I was fine.

"Itachi was suggesting that I teach you how to use the bow and arrow again. Consider it a back up plan in case your leg doesn't hold up after a while. Long range fighting works just as well."

I shook my head. "Not interested." I paused. "And what the hell do you mean by..._again_?"

He smirked lightly. "If memory serves me correctly, you used to have an affinity with them when you were a kid. Or have you completely forgotten all about that?"

I eyed the large bow and set of arrows draped around his back and shoulders and tried to recollect a younger version of me messing around with such weapons, but I was drawing a painful blank.

"...did I like using them?" I asked with a raised brow.

Shisui pursed his lips in thought. "Like? We couldn't get them off you. At least the times you and Itachi used to visit, you were always carrying the damn things about. Besides, while we trained, you kept shooting at things...not that you were very good at it."

He gave a wry smile and then shrugged off the bow. "Here...why don't you give it a try?"

"I told you, I'm much more comfortable with my katana. I wouldn't know what to do with that thing."

"It's like riding a bicycle," the annoying bastard insisted. "You'd be surprised at how quick you pick it up again. Test it and see, eh? You might end up liking it."

I opened my mouth to tell him to fuck off, but the next thing I knew he had thrust the damn thing in my hands. I felt like a complete fool holding this thing that was tall as me. How anyone could shoot anything that felt so lightweight was astonishing, and yet as I studied the fine bamboo construction, I could see the wear and tear Shisui had inflicted upon it over the years. Every nick and grove etched into it told of the many battles he had fought, and I hated to sound cliché, but it really did feel slightly...powerful to have this particular weapon in my grasp.

"Now then," Shisui began as he tossed an arrow to me. "Just like with any other weapon, be it the katana or the gun, using a bow and arrow requires the same intense hand-eye coordination. We, Uchiha, have been blessed with the gift of sight, obviously, so making use of this is like icing on the cake. Being able to see distances further than the average human gives us an advantage -"

"So how come there weren't many of us? I've studied the history books and yes, there were archers, but our ancestors seemed more content being wielders of the sword."

"True, but that doesn't stop those of us who choose the way of the bow and arrow to continue the tradition. Now stop bitching and try to shoot at..." He surveyed the surroundings for a second before pointing in the direction of a soldier several yards away. "Try to shoot the container he's holding."

"Are you insane? I could hurt him!"

"Yes, you could," came the matter-of-fact reply. "This is why you're going to be extra careful." He smirked and motioned for me to hold up the bow and take my stance. "Feet slightly apart like so...good...now relax your shoulders...Good God, you're so tense -"

"Just...teach..." I growled beneath my breath.

"Hmph...and you say you've forgotten how it's done."

"What are you talking about...?"

His shit-eating grin before his nod, had me looking down at the bow and arrow. It took me a second later to realize that I had actually loaded the damn arrow without even realizing it!

_(it's like riding a bicycle. Once you've done it...you never forget)_

"But...how...?" I whispered in confusion. "I haven't picked this up...never even used it..."

"Doesn't matter now," Shisui interrupted firmly. The grin was gone, and in its place was an intensity and yet small smile of approval. "Guess your big brother was right after all. You know he's always looking out for you and I'm glad he talked me into this. I've got only a few hours to teach you the basics, so let's get to work. All right?"

"...fine," I mumbled and raised the bow, holding onto the bowstring and arrow with three fingers. I could taste the slight saltiness of the string against my lips as I narrowed my right eye and focused on my target.

_(Nii-san! Nii-san! Look at what I caught!)_

_(Wow...you actually shot something edible today.)_

_(Hehehe...it's a rabbit.)_

_(I see that. Nice job. You seem to be getting better with that thing.)_

_(Yeah! One day I'm gonna be as good as Shisui-san! You'll see! I'll shoot a big boar and bring it home to mother for dinner.)_

_(I guess Shisui-san is going to have competition then, eh?)_

_(Yah! I'm gonna be the best! You'll see! I'm gonna be...)_

"Fuck!"

The arrow fell like a limp noodle to the ground, my trembling fingers and legs forcing me to my knees as that brief chunk of memory came flooding back. It was murky at best, but I could 'see' – I could see the young version of me running up to my brother with what looked more like a crossbow than an actual bow and arrow, but I couldn't tell.

"I take it you remembered something?"

I opened my mouth to tell him exactly what it was, but decided against it. I settled for simply nodding and forcing myself to my feet again. I picked up the dropped arrow and re-loaded it, struggling to catch my breath as the cold was beginning to seep into my fingers. In no time, they'd get numb if I didn't do this fast enough. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath –

_(I think you should be taught how to use the bow and arrow, Sasuke.)_

_(Why? I want to fight with the katana like Itachi, 'tousan!)_

_(Some people have better talents than others. Your brother is quite proficient with the sword, but I'm sure you'll do well with this.)_

_(Aww, but I don't want to play with a stupid bow and arrow. Why can't I been like nii-san?)_

_(Because you are not Itachi, Sasuke, and you'll never be Itachi. Now stop complaining and let's go!)_

_Huh...perhaps that's why I deliberately blocked the memory, because deep down, I never wanted to use them in the first place. I only did it to please my father. _

I locked in on my target and slowed my breathing.

_It was always about pleasing my father anyway. I was always second fiddle to Itachi. Right from the beginning._

With a light grunt, I released the arrow, hardly feeling the light twang of the bowstring across my cheek and lips as I watched the trajectory seemingly skewer in mid-flight before burying itself into the water bottle the soldier had just been about to lift off the ground. Even from this distance, his cry of indignation (and confusion) at being attacked was subdued as Shisui waved his arms to let him know we were the ones responsible.

"Impressive," Shisui praised.

"Whatever." I flung the bow back to him. "I'm not doing it. I hate the fucking weapon, and even if I have to limp all over the goddamn battlefield, then so be it. I never want to touch that damn thing again."

_Sorry, 'tousan. _

* * *

><p>By the third day, most of us were just about ready to go bat shit crazy with anxiety.<p>

We had not heard from Jūgo in a while – at least since his last owl message stating that Orochimaru's troops were beginning to head across the Tarumae Mountains. Three hundred soldiers were already on the move, and Itachi had sent out Officer Ibiki's troops to stall them as best he could. However, with only two hundred men, his job would be to simply flank Orochimaru's troops and stage a surprise attack that way.

"I want Kurobachi and your men to start heading for Usu," Itachi ordered as we hovered around the makeshift desk within the many hidden caves in our mountain base. He pinpointed several locations on the map. "The good thing is that we've got the element of surprise on our part. Orochimaru believes we're only a small army, but he'll grossly underestimate our numbers when we begin to get reinforcement from the daimyō..."

His words stalled as a slight commotion occurred just outside the cove. It was one of our messengers returning, and from the frantic expression on his visage, we could already tell that something had gone horribly wrong.

"What happened?" Itachi asked.

The young man shook his head as if unable to get the words out, but after taking a deep breath, he gushed out in a hurry. "We have problems, Itachi-sama. Looks like Hirano-dono never made it."

"What are you talking about?"

"He went to see Orochimaru two days ago and no one has seen him since then!"

"That fucking idiot!" Shisui bellowed in frustration, pretty much expressing the sentiment many of us had at this moment. "I knew we shouldn't have trusted him! Now what?!"

Gaara had done his part by approaching the daimyō and explaining the situation about the war. With the promise of more soldiers to be dispersed for our guaranteed victory, we were under the impression that the daimyō was in allegiance with us. Who knew he'd turn around to go complaining to Orochimaru? And now that Orochimaru was aware of what was going on, it was safe to say that the foolish man had finally gotten the punishment he deserved.

"What the hell are we going to do now?" Touya asked.

"Any word for the other daimyōs?" Itachi finally asked after a tense moment of silence.

"Nothing yet," the soldier replied.

"All right...Plan B. Shisui, get in contact with Gaara and let him know the situation. Make sure he lets the other daimyōs know that Hirano-dono has probably been killed by Orochimaru and how dire we need their assistance. With any luck, we'll have those damn troops pouring in by morning. In the meantime, we make do with what we have. Sasuke?"

I sat up at the sound of my name. "Yes?"

"What do you want to do? Start heading toward Byaku-Shinkyou with your troops or wait until reinforcements arrive? Remember, we are ready to back you up as best we can."

I could feel the weight of their gazes on me; more than aware that my final decision could be the turning point in all of this. The pregnant silence, broken only by the crackle of the flickering lamps, was nearly my undoing, but after days of contemplation, I knew damn well what I had to do.

"Haku and I will go alone," I finally said quietly. "Just us...no back up until we give the signal."

If they were surprised at this, no one gave any indication, though I noticed that Itachi's grip around the pencil had tightened a little more.

"Orochimaru will not dare attack when he sees me," I explained. "If I know him as well as I think I do, he might assume we are returning to make amends. I'll have to do my best to let him assume that. If and when I decide that the coast is clear...you can send them in. Is that all right?"

"I don't like it," Shisui stated flatly. "But hey...if that's the way you want to do it..."

He looked at Itachi, who had his head lowered as if unable to look at me anymore. I knew my brother was under a lot of strain and my decision was only going to make things even worse for him, but he would just have to trust me to finish what I had started all those years ago. This was now my burden to bear and not his.

"Fine," he finally croaked thickly. "We'll make preparations for your departure then."

Later that night, when most of the soldiers were fast asleep and the camp was relatively quiet, I found myself sitting on a perch that gave me a frightening but awe-inspiring view of the landscape below. Like a child's playground, ant-like hamlets or towns were broken by wide spaces of barren lands coated in white. Beyond that stood my home – Byaku-Shinkyou in all its glory despite how miniature it looked from here. If I squinted hard enough I was sure I'd be able to make out my bedroom -

"Shouldn't you be asleep?" came the quiet question that broke my thoughts. "You've got a long day ahead."

A steaming cup of weak tea was thrust in my direction and I accepted it willingly, while shifting slightly to make room for my brother. He sat beside me with a heavy sigh, and as I raised the tin cup to my lips, I stole a quick glance in his direction. His hair looked fairly unruly and not in its customary ponytail, and with the light gust of wind that passed every now and then, tendrils of his dark hair tended to whip across his face. The dark circles beneath his eyes, including the deep grooves that he inherited from father, were even more prominent than ever before. It was a sad and painful reminder of just how much he has been through and how much responsibility he took for not just me...but every one of the young men and women who came to him for protection.

I eyed the amber-colored liquid in my cup for a long minute.

(...ah hell...)

And hoping no one was around to see this, I reached out to wrap an arm around his shoulder to draw him closer to me. My cheeks flared as I felt his body stiffen at first, his breathless gasp of surprise, the weight of his stare before he finally relaxed into the semi-embrace. I couldn't look at him, but I didn't take my arm off either.

Besides, this tea tasted like crap.

"Shisui told me you refused to learn how to use the bow and arrow," he finally said quietly after several minutes of companionable silence.

"I'm not good at it."

"Liar. He said you were a natural."

"I'm much more content with my katana. Thanks."

"...your leg..."

"What about it?"

"The cold weather is bound to have it stiffening eventually, Sasuke. I worry -"

"Well stop being such a worry wart," I insisted with a firm shake of my head. "I've fought with tougher wounds before. This is nothing."

"I'll still feel better if you took them with you."

"Do you really think I should return there with that on my back? Orochimaru will pounce on me faster than you can say "rescue"."

"Hn...you really are one stubborn son-of-a-bitch, aren't you?" He chuckled weakly and pulled away from the embrace, but only to force me to look at him by cupping my chin gently.

"Are you really sure about this, Sasuke? Are you ready to see and face him all over again?"

I swallowed tightly, struggling to hold that intense gaze and lie to his face. "I'll be fine," I said out loud, though my voice suddenly sounded unsure and small. "I have to be, nii-san. This is something I have to do...the demons I have to face myself, and maybe...just maybe I'll finally have the strength to do something I should have done years ago."

Maybe it was my imagination, but I could swear there were tears in my brother's eyes, but that illusion was quickly dispersed as he reached out to cup the back of my head gently. He pulled me closer enough so I was made to rest my aching forehead against his chest. I wanted to protest the intimate embrace, but the sound of his steady heartbeat against my ears seemed to synchronize with mine. As we were now simply two hearts beating as one. Maybe it was a brotherly thing, but there was something oddly soothing about this...this embrace...this moment...

_(Sing me a bedtime song, nii-san)_

_(Aren't you too old for that now?)_

_(No, I'm not. I'm only five years old)_

_(But you're a big boy now, Sasuke and you really should stop climbing on my lap when I'm trying to study)_

_(Please...just this one time...I promise I won't bother you again)_

I squeezed my eyes shut as a heavy lump formed in my throat.

_(there is so much I want to share with you, __nii-san__. So many things I want to tell you__, so we both have to live through this. I cannot...I do not think I can bear the thought of losing you all over again. I'll go mad. I know I will)_

"And Haku? How is he feeling about returning?"

"...he...I don't know for sure," I confessed as I recalled the conversation I had with him when I had come to my decision. "He didn't argue against it, and simply took it as what was expected. I'm sure he's got his fears as well, after all...he knows he has to take out Kimimaro. That bastard was like a father to him at one point."

"Like Orochimaru was to you."

I groaned. "Please don't remind me."

"I'm sorry...I'm so sorry."

A gentle kiss on my head had me blushing in embarrassment, but I appreciated it more than I could ever tell him.

"If Dad and Mom could see us now," he whispered. "I'll probably be grounded for life for letting you take such a risk."

"I'm no longer a child, goddamn it."

"I know...you're a grown man who has a lover waiting for him many miles away..."

"Shut up!" I was literally crimson now and did finally push myself away from him as he chuckled.

"You really are adorable when you're embarrassed. Where's a camera when I need one?"

"I swear Itachi!"

"Stop hitting me, ouch! Damn! I haven't even gotten to the question I've been dying to ask...who was top?"

"Go to hell!" I sputtered as the sudden memory of that night had every part of me aching with need and a loneliness that was stomach churning.

"All right, I'll stop teasing," Itachi conceded with a smile. "But at least, now I've given you a reason to walk into that place with your head held high, hmm?"

I lowered the hands I had raised to pummel him again as his words slowly sank in. I was still flustered and flushed, but for a whole other reason now. He was right in that the sudden change of conversation to Naruto and his influence on me, was more than a good enough reason not to fear what awaited me tomorrow. Yes, I might have to see Orochimaru's ugly mug again and be reminded of all the horrors I witnessed while there, but there was going to be something different this time around. I wasn't doing this all alone. I would have Itachi, Shisui and every damn soldier in this place ready to back me up when needed, but most importantly, I had Naruto's warmth...that fiery spirit I had been attracted to from the moment I looked into those blue eyes.

He might not be there with me physically, but he sure as hell was with me...in this beating heart. And no one, not even Orochimaru would be able to take that away from me.

"Thank you," I finally said quietly. I rubbed my nose and lowered my gaze. "I really needed that."

"I'm glad," he replied with another kiss to the top of my head. "Now...do you want me to sleep with you tonight?"

"What?!"

He smirked lightly. "We used to do that as child -"

"In case you've forgotten, I am not a goddamn kid! How many times do I have to keep telling you that?"

"Well...you could always pretend I was Naruto -"

"Oh my God! Go to your damn cave, you sick pervert!"

"I'm just trying to help -"

"I don't need your help!"

"I could keep you warm -"

"Fuck you!"

"Where are you going?"

"To bed...ALONE!"

"Aww -"

"God, I hate you."

"And I love you too, my dearest little brother," came the words that floated after me despite my best efforts to frown at the mushy sentiments. He's such an idiot and yet, I couldn't stop smiling like a goddamn moron.

_And I love you too, nii-san. Guess I always will._

* * *

><p>Dawn broke with the pale peek of the sun over the horizon. It was almost too soon to herald the new day, and yet I could safely say that despite whatever trepidations I might have had, last night was the best sleep I have had so far, and I knew it was all thanks to my conversation with Itachi.<p>

Unfortunately, I had not expected this mini-farewell party to show up this early, for Karin, Hinata, Tenten, Lee, Neji, Deidara, Sasori, Shino, and of course, Itachi and Shisui hovered around the horses Haku and I were mounting. It was difficult to gauge what most of them were thinking especially the men.

"Remember to use either Jūgo's owl or the flare to alert us to what's happening," Shisui reiterated. "In the interim, we'll send Neji, Lee, Tenten, Shino, Deidara and Sasori to tail you both starting tonight. They can be temporary back ups until the real ones arrive. All right?"

"Fine with me," I replied with a nod of slight impatience. I was more than eager to get started on this journey already. With any luck, we would arrive at Byaku-Shinkyou by nightfall or mid-evening depending on how fast we pushed the horses.

"Take care of yourself for me," Karin urged with a tremulous smile that betrayed how hard she was trying to keep her emotions in check. The same thing went for Hinata – even if we hadn't been that close. It was baffling to me. At least Tenten didn't look too distraught. If anything, she seemed eager to join the fray and was already discussing travel plans with Neji.

"Use this," she continued quietly, while shoving what appeared to be a small clay jar into my hands. "It's something Hinata and I worked on, and we medical team plan to use it on any wounded soldiers out there on the battlefield."

"What is it?"

"A healing balm. It's not magic and your wounds won't disappear immediately, but it will at least numb the pain once it's applied."

Now this could definitely come in handy, and it was probably going to be more than enough for Haku and I should we encounter any skirmishes on the way there. I tucked it away and managed a smile of gratitude.

"Thank you, Karin." I paused for a heartbeat before adding quickly. "For everything...you know..I...uh...I really appreciate it."

Her blush and polite bow of her head before turning away filled me with an emotion that was difficult to describe, and for a second, I briefly wondered if this would be the last time I'd get to see her again.

_(Urgh. Stop thinking like that, Sasuke!) _

From the corner of my eye, I noticed that Sasori was giving something to Haku, which he slid into his _yukata_. Was that a weapon? Whatever it was, it was enough to reveal my ex-servant's cheeks turning slightly red even as he shook the other man's hand and nodded to the kisses thrown his way by the girls. However, my curiosity would have to be curbed because time was a-wasting and we had to leave before the sun rose higher.

"Ready, Haku?" I called out, with a gentle nudge of my horse's side to signal that it was time to go.

"Ready, Sasuke-sama. Goodbye everyone, and be safe!"

We waved in departure and I was careful not to stare at my brother for too long as if hoping to memorize his features for the last time. I gripped the reigns and grit my teeth, convincing myself that I would definitely see them again. I wasn't walking into a suicide mission and they were going to be able to take care of themselves. This had to succeed, no matter how dangerous it appeared to be.

As for Haku, it was almost strange to see him dressed in the way he used to while we lived in Byaku-Shinkyou. The cold weather didn't seem to bother him much as he was content with only a thick turtleneck sweater beneath his _yukata_. The bun on top of his head was wrapped in that familiar cloth, while twin ponytails fell down the side of his face, only held back by a headband wrapped around his head. He must have finally realized I was studying him in silence, for he blushed and bowed his head slightly as if acknowledging my presence.

I opened my mouth to ask him if he was all right, but the sudden **BOOM** to ricochet off the mountains behind us, had him gasping and the horses neighing in frightened protest.

"Whoa there...steady..." I cajoled my ride gently. "Nothing to be afraid of..."

I could feel my heart drumming loudly in my chest as I nodded and urged Haku and our horses to keep moving forward.

There were several more quick successions of this thunderous sound, and my first concern was that this could cause an avalanche especially since we were still mid-way down the mountainous terrain. I knew the explosions and rapid gunfire wasn't coming from our camp, but the mountains further south where Kurobachi and Ibiki's troops were to engage in combat with Orochimaru's forces.

My feverish prayer was that the other three remaining daimyōs would see reason and send the back up we desperately needed. In the meantime, our task was to make it to Byaku-Shinkyou safely without drawing any attention to ourselves. It was highly plausible that Orochimaru had spies just waiting in the wings to attack us at a moment's notice.

By mid-day, Haku and I finally made it to the bottom, where I suggested we take a quick break to nourish ourselves and hash out a battle plan in case of an emergency. We found a flowing brook...or it would have been if half of it wasn't frozen solid. Still, Haku was able to prepare a quick meal of grilled fish that tasted heavenly all things considered.

As I ate – I noticed he didn't eat much – he dug out his weapons from the leather pouch which had been draped around his neck and shoulders. In it were several throwing knives, many of them sharpened to the point that they literally shone beneath the cold sun. He withdrew a small vial, and I recognized it as the object Sasori had given him earlier.

"Poison?" I queried.

He nodded with a sheepish expression on his visage. "Sasori-san suggested I use this. He said it's much stronger than the ones I've been using in the past." Methodically, he began to coat the blades with the clear liquid, being sure not to get any on his fingers in the process.

"Why don't you test to see just how effective it is?" I prodded, more than curious to see if this worked.

Haku looked up. "Right now?"

"Sure." I shrugged lightly. "Why not?" I pointed to a dying tree across the brook where a squirrel sat on its highest branch nibbling on something. "Your target."

And I swear before I was even done saying the word, the poor beast was already plummeting to earth with a dull thud. Haku and I jogged over to the dead creature, where the thick snow was already trying to suck it in. His throwing knife was embedded within its stomach, and in addition to the growing pool of bright red blood mingling with the white, there was a sickly purple bruise forming around the area of the stab wound. Haku withdrew the knife, and what we saw was enough to have us grimacing. It was effective all right, so effective that the poison was literally eroding away the animal's intestines right before our eyes.

"Damn," I whistled in appreciation. "What kind of poison is that? Did he tell you?"

Haku wiped his knife on the snow, his expression one that was difficult to decipher. At best, I would consider it consternation and worry, and it didn't take a genius to understand why he was feeling this way.

"It's inevitable, Haku," I finally said quietly. "And I realize that you probably still harbor loyal feelings to him, but you have to remember...he tried to kill you."

"I know that, Sasuke-sama," he whispered. "I know that all too well."

Not surprisingly, the heavens decided to open up and the first few flakes of snow began to trickle down to earth gently. The good news, it would be a protective cloak against possible enemies. The bad news? The journey was going to be considerably slower thanks to more snow accumulating. It was difficult enough already getting the horses to move as fast as we'd like. Either way, we had no more time to spare. If we hoped to reach Byaku-Shinkyou by nightfall, we had to be back on the road.

I looked down at the still kneeling figure, who was now burying the squirrel within the snow, and felt my heart swell with compassion for him.

_(a gentle killer__...how ironic)_

I reached out to pat his head tenderly, biting my lower lip hard at the tear-filled yet stubbornly determined look he gave me in return.

"Come on," I finally ordered with a small smile. "It's time to go."

He sniffled and took a deep breath before rising to his feet. "Yes...Sasuke-sama."

It took us less than five minutes to clear our camp site and load up our horses again, and as we continued our journey – with both of us silent and lost in our thoughts – we could still hear the faint cacophony of battle behind us; a sharp and almost poignant contradiction to the peaceful hamlet we were trotting by.

None of these innocent people would understand just what was at stake or how many lives would be lost to maintain the freedom they so richly deserved, and it was my sworn oath and duty to make sure they never did.

* * *

><p><em>There are times when we must fight from the shadows to protect the ones we love. To take the bullet or to live by the sword, it matters not what road you choose. To wear the <em>_**mon**__ of the Uchiha clan is to declare a willingness to lay down your life at a moment's notice. There should be no doubts nor fears nor hindrances to completing one's missions. For never forget who you are and where you come from._

_-Uchiha Madara_

_(The Hidden Scrolls) _


	40. 40: When the Levee Breaks

**Notes: **What? What's this? An update? What manner of sorcery is this? *lol* Well, it's been a long time coming, so I sincerely hope it was worth the wait. As I mentioned earlier, we are in the final stages of the story, so it's gonna be fights and what not until the big reunion (or will that even happen? Hmmmm). Thanks so very much again for all the kind words, encouragement, feedback and new readers *bows gratefully* I really do appreciate you all from the bottom of my heart. Enjoy!

**P.S:** May I just go ahead and double apologize for all the freakin' typos I noticed in the earlier chapters while re-reading? Oh my God. It's a miracle your eyes are still functioning *lol*

* * *

><p><span><strong>Chapter 40:<strong>

**When the Levee Breaks**

_From this world I think  
>That there is nowhere to escape.<br>I wanted to hide  
>In the mountains' farthest depths;<br>But there I hear the stag's cry._

**Fujiwara no Toshinari**

* * *

><p><strong>Shibuya<strong>

**Tokyo Prefecture**

_Naruto:_

"You intrigue me."

His voice seeped through my hazy consciousness; slightly muffled and disembodied as if coming from the depths of a well. I realized it was probably the combination of the opium fumes and the amount of _sake_ I've consumed so far, but either way, all his words elicited from me were a breathless giggle. I lifted heavy lashes to peer at him.

"Wha…?" I mumbled.

He laughed softly, his large hand reaching out to brush away some hair from my face. Simizutani Satoshi – the _shateigashira_ (second lieutenant) of the Bakufu Syndicate – has so far made no qualms that he's attracted to me and my decision to finally spend an evening in his company has made him one happy man. To go as far as renting an entire penthouse suite, hiring a few choice call girls to entertain us (though they have long gone and we're alone again), making sure the finest meals were at my disposal, and just about bending over backwards to keep me pleased…I almost felt sorry for the guy in a way. Was he really that lonely (he did have a wife and a couple of other mistresses) or was he just finding a way to kill time? The life of a lieutenant must be suuuuch hard work, eh? Whatever the case, I reminded myself that I was doing all this for a reason. I was one step closer to Ikegami, so even if it meant having to soiree with the enemy -

(Even if my body or yours is being used to satiate the pleasures of the flesh, your heart remains and belongs to me for all eternity.)

_You got that right, Sasuke,_ I thought with a bittersweet smile as Satoshi's lips brushed against my forehead tenderly. I tried to control the shudder that went through me at the sensation; realizing that this was actually the first time anyone had been this 'intimate' with me in a while. I tried to sit up, forcing a smile on my visage and wagging a finger to his face as if to admonish him. He mock-pouted, his handsome features trying to look miserable at my rejection.

"What would your wife think?" I asked in a melodramatic show of dismay.

He snorted and shook his head; his good mood slightly dissipating as he lifted the ornate pipe from the low table before us. He tapped some more tobacco into it, lit it (where the immediate sweet smell reminded me that this was anything but ordinary tobacco), and took a deep lungful before letting out a breath of satisfaction. He leaned back on the large plush pillows and offered the hallucinogenic to me.

At the shake of my head, he smirked and shrugged broad shoulders. It made the _yukata_ he was wearing slide off said shoulders to reveal the elaborate ink work on his skin. _Damn._ I wonder how many years it took for him to get them all done. He actually made Kojima's tattoos look like child's play.

"My wife could be a dead fish for all the affection she shows me," he began quietly, forcing me to tear my gaze away from the body art to his pensive features. "We were married out of convenience. Call it one of the 'perks' of becoming a member of the Syndicate. She's related to the _kumichō_, and it's only natural that she'll have to marry in the 'family', eh? She hated me on sight as I did her, but for the sake of keeping the peace, we had to deal with it." He gave another snort of derision. "You should have seen the wedding. Such a garish display of opulence, it was sickening."

I studied him thoughtfully, struggling to maintain a level head in all this despite the obvious effects his smoking was having on me. If there's one thing I've noticed about Satoshi - in all my dealings with him so far – it was his revelation of a decent-human-being streak than I would have liked. He's been more accommodating to my negotiations, and has been the bridge between me, the first lieutenant (who I've only met once and didn't leave with the best of impressions) and eventually with the head honcho himself. Though I knew of his ruthless history, after all Satoshi and his faction were responsible for quite a few exploits over the years (how else would he have gotten to this high-ranking position otherwise?) It still made me wonder if he really was getting weary of his duties. He was still only thirty-five years old; a relative young-gun in the grand scheme of things.

_Don't get too lax all the same, Naruto,_ Jiraiya's voice whispered in my head. _Don't forget where he comes from and what he represents. Keep him at arm's length as best you can._

"She absolutely refuses to bear my children, and that's fine with me," Satoshi was still complaining. "Unfortunately, it makes me look bad to the rest of the family. What's the point of me being married to such a woman and unable to produce an heir? Besides, does she think I don't know she's having an affair with Miyazaki?"

Ouch. Miyazaki Manabu was the _wakagashira_ (first lieutenant) I was talking about earlier. Why is this little nugget of info about his relationship with Satoshi's wife not surprising in the slightest? Either way, I didn't want to concern myself with Satoshi's marital woes and was just about to interrupt and change the subject when the next words out of his mouth froze me in place.

"Miyazaki wants to become the next _kumichō_," he muttered, his gaze still trained blindly ahead. "Of course in the hierarchy this isn't unexpected, but he's so goddamn impatient. He believes that the _oyabun_ is becoming too restless and out-of-control; his words not mine. He doesn't believe that Ikegami is capable of running the family any longer and is actually in talks of planning a coup d'état. Can you believe that?" He gave a shaky laugh and ran trembling fingers through his hair. "I don't know why I'm telling you this, but…" He slid a heated gaze in my direction and attempted to reach for my chin. But maybe the drug was making his senses all mixed up because his hand immediately dropped heavily to the pillows. "Maybe it's because I've fallen head over heels in love with you. How silly, eh?"

(silly? Probably. Only because I suddenly feel so damn sorry for you)

However, the wheels in my head were spinning. This situation was all too perfect. If Satoshi was right, it was clear that the Bakufu was already beginning to dismantle within itself. Coupled with the fact that I (along with the Mibu) were taking away more turf/territory from them…it was only a matter of time before the entire Syndicate crumbled without me having to do too much work.

"We are no longer what we used to be," Satoshi adds quietly as if reading my thoughts. "The Bakufu is becoming a mockery of itself. Some days…some days I just wish it would all go away…"

_Don't worry,_ I thought coldly. _I'll be more than glad to help make it all possible._

"I really appreciate you telling me this," I said aloud, realizing I'd have to play ball if I hoped to wheedle any more information from him. The last thing I wanted to happen was for him to come to his senses and clam up before I could suck him dry. I had to milk this situation for all its worth. Briefly closing my eyes and asking Sasuke for forgiveness, I lay back against the pillows in open invitation, allowing my _yukata_ to slide off my shoulders and ride up my thighs in an effort to reveal more of myself to the older man. I had no fucking idea how to look 'seductive', but I guess I managed to pull it off because guess what?

It worked like a charm.

Watching those eyes widen a little, to hear his breathing suddenly quicken, and to notice the obvious effect my actions were having on Satoshi Junior, I bit my inner cheek hard enough to draw blood and forced myself to relax.

(all for the job, Naruto. Just bear with it. Remember, it's all for the job.)

"Oh Naruto," he groaned, tossing the pipe to the table (where I hoped it wouldn't fall to the floor and have this place up in flames). "You have no idea how much I've longed for this…"

He was just about to lay over me, fingers already fumbling with the sash of my robe, when I held him back with a hand pressed against his chest. I stared into the lust-filled dark eyes and smiled a little.

"I want to know _everything_," I requested quietly but firmly. I watched his lips part as if to protest and I raised a knee to rub it gently against an erection so visible (and damn hard), his low gasp of agony was almost music to my ears. "_Everything_, Satoshi," I insisted with a look that told him I wasn't fucking around no matter how much he wanted to screw me. "Do you understand?"

"Whatever you want," he finally moaned with a fervent nod. "I'll do it…I'll give you…anything and everything you could ever want."

(this better be worth it)

I wrapped my arms around his neck and smirked into his shoulder as he dove in for his prize.

_One down and a couple more to go…_

* * *

><p><strong>Fushimi-ku<strong>

**Kyoto Prefecture**

Miyazaki Manabu was a difficult man to shadow. Shikamaru could attest to that.

The first lieutenant, of the Bakufu Syndicate, was no fool. He knew how much of a target he was, hence he was not likely to be seen in public without at least three bodyguards surrounding him. If you were lucky enough to see him in public that is. With a face that looked as if it had been pounded with a frying pan a few too many times, a physique that could rival any bodybuilder's and a penchant for wearing white suits, he fit the stereotypical role of the _yakuza_ perfectly.

Although Miyazaki seemed content to work from the shadows, Shikamaru had seen firsthand how ruthless and callous the lieutenant could be. Just the other day, he had the misfortune of watching the _wakagashira_ torture a hapless young man at the docks (whose only crime was apparently failing to recognize he was in the presence of such 'greatness' by refusing to serve them ahead of early patrons at a local bar). Miyazaki, armed with heavy brass knuckles on both hands, had punched him so mercilessly until the poor guy's face was barely recognizable. Each fingernail was then pulled out slowly with pliers, resulting in such agonized screams from the man, Shikamaru was sure it would haunt him for the rest of his life. As if that wasn't bad enough, all ten fingers were then chopped off with the sharpest _wakizashi_ he had ever seen. And that was only the beginning.

_Christ!_ Talk about being a cold brutal killer.

After a long week of scouting his daily routines, and finally having enough, it was now time to set Naruto's plan in action.

Ironic it would have to finished in such a manner.

Still, he had to give it to Naruto for being able to give him so much information to work with. He knew the blond had ended up sharing Satoshi's bed, something Naruto had cringed to talk about, though he insisted he had taken at least ten showers after it was finished.

Shikamaru chuckled at the memory of Naruto's stringent voice, while lighting up a cigarette –

_(ah beautiful – but cold – night)_

…and blowing out a cloud of smoke. Sexual activities aside, Naruto's instructions had been clear and concise.

Miyazaki Manabu was no longer needed, and it was up to Shikamaru to make sure it happened.

He shook his head, smirking lightly at the responsibility placed on his shoulders. He didn't mind doing this, after all Manabu was one of the folks who had gotten him incarcerated in the first place. It was only poetic justice to finally see the bastard go down.

_(some people do not deserve to live, that's all)_

He tossed the cigarette aside and raised the binoculars to his face, squinting as he counted the number of guards roaming the premises of the private residence.

_Only four…that should be no problem._

Not surprising either because the residence actually belonged to the wife of Simizutani Satoshi. Not her marital home, but a rented get-a-way haven for her extracurricular activities one might say. As it stood, (and many might not see as such a surprise) the one weakness Miyazaki had was that of being in love with another man's woman.

Go figure.

An entire day surveillance Simizutani Ayame by Shichi (#7) had revealed nothing much. She was just your typical spoiled, rich trophy wife, who spent most of the day shopping or getting pampered. Though she was pretty, it was of the cold kind; the woman hardly smiled and when she did, it almost looked cynical and distant. The only time she looked relatively animated was when she met up with Miyazaki as evident of the photographs taken by Shichi when the two met in a secret location. Seeing those two engaged in a passionate embrace was the most disgusting thing Shikamaru ever had the misfortune to witness.

(birds of a feather flocking together and all that crap)

He glanced at his watch. 10.33PM.

Miyazaki had arrived about an hour ago – alone. Why not? Why would he want his private affairs to be broadcasted to the world?

Shikamaru placed two fingers between his lips and blew once; a sharp whistle that rustled the leaves beside him. Like two shadows, Yottsu (#4) and Roku (#6) dropped lithely onto the sturdy branch and awaited their instructions. At his subtle nod, they disappeared from sight as quickly as they had arrived. Shikamaru raised the binoculars to his face again to watch was about to take place, which was a good thing because those damn swordsmen had already reached their destination and had promptly taken down two of the guards before he could blink. Anyone looking would assume that the two men were simply slumped against the wall sleeping, but Shikamaru knew better.

He lowered the equipment and leapt down from his hiding place to join the waiting duo.

Yottsu slid the gate open, though they all cringed at the grating sound it made. Naturally, this alerted the other two guards within the compound. He braced myself as one of them spun around, pistol already withdrawn.

"Who goes-urk!"

Roku – thanks to his small size – had already leapt onto action; literally jumping onto the huge guy's shoulders, from behind, to slice his neck cleanly with a _kaiken_. He leapt down and not wasting a moment – while still crouched – he withdrew his _katana_ (which was slung across his back instead of the traditional waist area) – to go for the second guard's legs. Shikamaru winced as his loud cry of pain ricocheted into the night, but Roku was quick to shut him up, this time burying the _kaiken_ within the open mouth.

_Remind me never to get this guy pissed off, _Shikamaru thought with a wince.

"We will watch for anyone else," Yottsu whispered harshly and nodded toward the bungalows. "You go."

Not needing to be told that twice, Shikamaru had already blended within the shadows to make his way toward the private quarters. The pistol buried within his jacket suddenly seemed heavy as he approached his destination, and he could hear his heartbeat thundering within his chest. He tried hard to squash down the idea of what he was about to do, of who he was about to take out and the gravity/magnitude of shockwaves this would cause come morning.

_Don't think,_ Naruto had advised him. _Just do it and get it out of the way. It's the only way you can finish your mission, Shika. Don't think. Got it?_

"Got it," Shikamaru whispered as the first sounds of breathless giggles reached him. He made the turn and crouched amongst the well-tended hedges, his lips thinning as he noticed the shadows within the closed _shoji_ screens. He couldn't really make out what they were saying, but it was clear they were both naked and jostling around in a playful wrestling match…or whatever the hell it was they were doing.

_What to do? Shoot through the screen or open it and surprise them? _

The element of surprise might work, but then again, he had seen how fast Miyazaki could be with his gun. He couldn't take a chance barging in and then having the man withdraw a weapon from beneath the pillow to take him out. He would have to take his chances shooting through the screen and hoping that all the lessons he had taken from both Sergei and Kakashi would come to fruition.

"Easy, easy," he whispered as he slowly withdrew the pistol with its silencer. He was now acutely aware of how quiet the grounds were…well except for laughter seeping through the screen as the shadow of Miyazaki now seemed to be going down on Satoshi's wife. With her legs raised to wrap around the man's neck and the way she arched into his hungry mouth, there was no doubt about it.

_Perfect._

Shikamaru rose to his feet.

_Do not think. Do not think. Do not think._

He leapt onto the veranda, slid open the _shoji_ screen quickly with a gloved hand, where he would be allowed to see what the shadows had so tactfully hidden from him. It was Miyazaki alright, face buried between creamy thighs as he licked and slurped like a man deprived. He would only have a moment to look up in surprise at the sudden draft of wind when the bullet found its way between his eyes. Satoshi's wife – who had seen the newcomer and was just about to open her mouth to scream in terror – was silenced just as quickly; the bullet lodging itself into her right temple.

_(so sorry, ma'am)_

Shikamaru hated to have to kill the woman, but at that moment, she was nothing more than an obstacle and witness to an assassination. It was unfortunate indeed, but as they say…mission motherfucking accomplished.

* * *

><p><strong>Shibuya<strong>

**Tokyo Prefecture**

_Naruto:_

As expected, news of Miyazaki's death – and the circumstances surrounding it – was all anyone and everyone could talk about. It was one thing to be found dead, but a whole other kettle of fish to find yourself face-down between the legs of your mistress. Talk about dying in a happy place, eh?

Still, I had to applaud Shikamaru and his crew for doing such a clean and trail-proof job. And since Miyazaki was known to have quite a few enemies, it could take years for the police to go through their lists of possible suspects. None of which would lead to me.

I took another sip of my green tea, admiring the sights and sounds of the city from my booth in the upscale restaurant. I say 'my' because the owners have been paid off to reserve this cozy little nook away from other prying customers' gazes while I engaged in private meetings. Unfortunately, my 'date' for the afternoon was going to be a reminder of just what transpired the last time we spoke to each other, and I mentally prepared for him trying to re-capture the 'mood'.

(never again)

Sex with Satoshi had been anything but fun – sure it satiated the pent-up frustration that has built up over the past few months, but…well, simply put, he wasn't Sasuke.

(but then again, who the fuck _can_ be Sasuke?)

I'm not ashamed to admit that during 'the act', my mind drifted off a few times to the time Sasuke and I did it. Sadly anytime I came close to imagining it was his lips wrapped around my cock, Satoshi's sloppy way of slathering it with saliva ruined the fantasy. Secondly, he sweats too much, so much so I was literally drenched with it causing our skins to slide against each other in an annoying (and pretty gross) way. He wasn't particularly gentle – as if I assumed that was going to happen – and when he finally got around to sticking his pitifully skinny dick inside me, I kinda understood why his wife might find happiness someplace else. He grunted and panted like a steam engine on its last legs while I moaned and groaned in all the right places. When he came (which was less than five minutes later), I barely felt it and I literally had to work myself into an orgasm – which wasn't too hard to do. By then Satoshi was finally spent and had collapsed on me, which gave me plenty of time to imagine Sasuke finishing the deed. Hah. Recalling Satoshi's pleased features when I cried out was almost funny.

"I'm…I'm glad you enjoyed yourself," he had panted with a shit-eating grin. "You are incredible, Naruto. So beautiful…"

_Whatever you say. Limpy. _

He would have gone straight to sleep, but I reminded him of his promise to spill the beans and made him talk until I got everything I needed from him. For his efforts, I decided I might as well give him a blowjob as a parting 'thank you' gift. And wouldn't you know it? As soon as the bastard came (he barely got to the three-minute mark) he was out like a light.

_Urgh._

Let's just say that I have never brushed my teeth (or taken several showers) so long and hard after that.

(never fucking again)

"Sorry I'm late," came the slightly breathless greeting as a shadow fell over me.

I looked up to notice it was the object of my thoughts. He looked flushed and not at all the cool-calm-and-collected Satoshi I had known before. Could one blame him? The first lieutenant had been assassinated and for all Satoshi knew he could be next on the suspect's target list. Besides, some were already suspecting _he_ might be the one responsible for the murder. It was his (dead) wife being fucked by his _kyodai_ after all. Anyone would expect Satoshi to be furious about such a thing, right?

"How are you?" I asked amiably, watching as he glanced around him in panic, hardly acknowledging the presence of the waiter who placed a cup of tea before him.

"How do you think I am?" came the feverish whisper. "I feel like everyone's watching me."

"Your disguise looks good though," I approved with a smile. He was wearing a fisherman's hat over a shaggy blond wig and matching moustache. The black jacket, turtleneck sweater and matching pants he wore covered up any tattoos that might have revealed who he really was.

"That's not the point, Naruto," he groaned in dismay, trembling hands reaching for the cup of tea to guzzle half of it down without taking a pause. "I…" He swallowed tightly and leaned closer to me. "I need your help."

I raised a brow and tried to look confused. "My help? What do you mean?"

He leaned closer still; eyes blazing with a fear that was palpable. "I think Ikegami wants me out of the picture. He thinks I'm the one responsible for getting both of them killed and I think he wants me dead."

"Ah, you're just thinking too much."

"Thinking too much? How would you explain my car almost getting ambushed yesterday or the fact that he hasn't returned any of my calls or _this_?" He reached into the pocket of his jacket to whip out a small clear plastic bag…well it would have been clear if it wasn't for the thick and congealing maroon-colored stains coating its sides. At the bottom sat half a finger – whose finger? I didn't care to know, but it was definitely a disgusting sight. As for the message? It was obvious. Whoever had sent this to Satoshi wanted him to know that he was on their watch list. If it was Ikegami, then Satoshi definitely had a lot to pay for.

I sighed and took another sip of my tea. I waved a hand for him to tuck that thing away before anyone else noticed before pursing my lips as if in deep thought.

"Let me meet him," I finally said aloud. His gasp of disbelief was immediate.

"What…?"

"I want to meet him," I repeated; ignoring the sudden thud of my heart within my chest. "I have something to say to him, something that might even save your life."

The rush of gratitude and hope on his features was nauseating and I had to look away; making a show of admiring the spring rolls a waiter had placed on our table earlier. I picked up my chopsticks to push one of them around on the plate.

"Set up a meeting between us," I continued firmly. "But tell him that I do not want any other party in the room. This is going to be a private affair. Is that understood?"

I watched him nod his head like a fish, but I wanted to make sure he understood exactly what I was saying. Pointing my chopsticks at him, and keeping a smile on my face (though my eyes remained steady on his flushed visage), I added quietly.

"Simply tell him that the man who now owns most of his beloved Honshu region – or will soon own most of it – wants to negotiate with him. If there are any others in the meeting besides us, I cannot guarantee his safety, and I doubt that the last thing he wants is an all-out war with the Mibu at this stage, hmm?"

"He will laugh -"

"Let him laugh, but he sure as hell won't when I send my boys in to take control of Niigata."

I smirked at the low gasp of shock to escape his lips. Niigata was one of the strongest turfs of the Bakufu. It was just one of their many links to their overseas connections in China, Taiwan, and Hong Kong. Taking control of that area was akin to delivering a blow to Ikegami's solar plexus. He might as well kiss over fifty percent of his profits goodbye once that was in my grasp.

"Besides, think of this as a win for you!" I added cheerily. "You can always claim that you'll get back Niigata from me to get back into his good graces, eh? We still have our sixty-forty deal going, don't we?"

He looked pained, but said nothing. He knew he was cornered and had nowhere else to go or anyone to look up to. I was his only hope for survival now, and knowing that made my sacrifice all worth it.

Later that evening, Shikamaru and I found ourselves pouring over the newspapers, mostly those coming from the north. The rumbles of the uprising between Orochimaru and Akatsuki had not yet made the front page, but the blurbs were there for anyone caring to pay more attention. It looked like the rest of Japan was being kept in the dark, and for good reason. If this became nationwide news, one could imagine the ripple of fear and chaos it would strike within the hearts of the innocent civilians who would not understand what the fuss was about. The Prime Minister, who was already a pawn for Orochimaru, might want the whole thing swept under the rug, claiming that it was nothing more than a local brouhaha likely to resolve itself in time. The Emperor – who was nothing more than a figure head like the _daimyōs_ – could only sit back and hope that his parliament would do the right thing. Said parliament was barely hanging on, what with Danzo going about eliminating his enemies with the special elections just around the corner.

Speaking of the devil –

"When did he say he was coming back from his trip?" Shikamaru asked.

"Sometime next week. He's pretty vague with dates," I replied with a shrug of my shoulders. Danzo had left the country a few days ago, which was one of the reasons I had to get all these meetings with the Bakufu done as quickly as possible. I was under no illusion that I was still being followed by his spies, but so far – if I was – no one had made any overt attempts to take me out or accost me as being a traitor.

It was still a slippery slope or line I was treading on, and if Satoshi was unable to keep his end of the deal to get me face-to-face with Ikegami…I would have to come up with a Plan B fast. The more time I wasted, the more likely I was to receive the dreaded mission to take out Gaara. The same Gaara who was now in talks with the three living _daimyōs_ in an attempt to get them to see reason. Temari had delivered the gut-wrenching news about the North _daimyō's_ demise as received from the wire sent by Itachi. If Gaara was unsuccessful, then all hope was probably lost. It would really have to come down to Sasuke taking out Orochimaru for any sort of victory.

(just as they are relying on me to take down Ikegami and Danzo soon)

It was why this meeting was necessary, why it was important, why I had to meet that bastard to take my chances then. I knew it was going to be slim and dangerous, but it was one I was willing to take. I knew he wouldn't go with my ultimatum – as Satoshi had so succinctly put it "he would laugh". He was the _kumichō_ of one of the largest Syndicates in the goddamn country. Did I really hold out hope that he'd actually allow us to meet completely 'alone'?

Time to fight fire with fire then.

"Shika…" I began quietly. I had to tell him about this stage of the plan though I was already sure of what his answer was going to be. However, before I could open my mouth to begin the tale, the shrill sound of the telephone interrupted us. We both started in surprise, neither of us expecting it unless it was Temari. However, recalling that I had given Satoshi the number to this apartment, I dove for the device and spoke into it warily.

"Hello?"

"Naruto?"

I expelled a breath of air in relief, turning to give Shika's querying gaze a thumbs up before focusing on the conversation.

"Any good news for me?"

He took a deep breath and continued in a hushed whisper, which led me to assume he was probably calling from a phone booth somewhere. "He agreed…much quicker than I anticipated actually."

My heart rate quickened again.

"He says he's been looking forward to meeting you and has chosen a neutral location for it. Do you know where the Hamarikyu Gardens are?"

_Damn…in public. Of course._

"Yes," I replied with a tightening of my lips.

"He will meet you at the teahouse there. It's been reserved for only the two of you long after the tourists have left for the day. You should be there around nine in the evening on Friday. Is that okay with you?"

_Two days from now…God, I hope Danzo doesn't show up before then._

"Friday's fine. You told him my instructions?"

"To the letter and he's fine with it. All the same -"

"I know, I know. I'm not that much of an idiot to think he'll actually come alone. Don't worry about me, Satoshi. I'll be fine."

He began to say something, but sighed instead. "I still do worry about you, Naruto. I wasn't lying when I said my feelings for you are real. I can't…haven't stopped thinking about you since that night…I want…I need to be with you…"

I squeezed my eyes shut and pinched the bridge of my nose; counting slowly to ten inside to control myself before cutting him short with carefully measured words. "I think we both know this can't and won't continue, Satoshi-san. What we had was…" And I had to say this without throwing up in my mouth. "Wonderful. Why ruin the memories?"

"But -"

"Do not call me again, Satoshi-san," I cut in firmly. "Let me be the one seeking you out next time, all right? Now go about your business and leave everything to me."

"You'll protect me, right? You promised -"

"Yes, yes. I promise. Goodbye."

I hung up before he could continue his whining, and looking back now, perhaps I should have been a little kinder to him considering it would be the last time I ever heard his voice.

"It's too dangerous," were the first words out of Shika's mouth as soon as I regaled the plan to him. "It's too fucking dangerous, Naruto."

"I know that," I replied, striding into the room where we kept our arsenal of weapons. I knew I couldn't take any with me as I was bound to be frisked from head to toe. However, Sergei had taught me a neat little trick regarding concealment of weapons, and if even that was discovered, I still had my fists.

"Which is where you come in, my friend," I turned to him with a smile, while placing a hand on his shoulder to squeeze gently. "Ikegami is going to come with his small army and I will have mine waiting in the wings with you at the helm. So get everything ready for Friday night."

"Naruto -"

I placed a finger against his lips to silence him.

"I've been waiting a long time for this moment, Shika," I said softly. "It's what I've been training for all these months, isn't it? It may not even happen on that night, but I'm sure as hell going to try. I am running out of time, and this is no time to second guess my decision or get cold feet."

His dark eyes studied me in thoughtful silence, and when he seemed to come to a conclusion in his mind, he lowered his gaze and shook his head lightly; forcing my finger to fall from his lips.

"Fine," he finally croaked thickly. "I'll watch your back, but I swear at the first sign of trouble, I'm barging in there no matter what. You hear me?"

I grinned and wrapped my arms around his shoulders, ignoring his protest that I leave him alone or he'd punch me in the face.

"Thank you," I whispered sincerely into his ear which was enough to still his movements. "Thank you for everything, Shika."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," came the low mutter though his arms were now encircling my waist as well. "Let's just get this shit over and done with."

I laughed and placed a hard kiss to his temple. "Yes, sir!"

* * *

><p><strong>Hamarikyu Gardens<strong>

**Chūō, Tokyo Prefecture**

**Friday, 8:31PM**

Miserable weather.

The drizzle (getting stronger by the minute) was making my idea to walk into the gardens a foolish one, but I had made the decision to do so after the mind-numbing news I received from Shikamaru on the drive here.

Simizutani Satoshi was dead.

His bloated naked body was fished from Tokyo Bay early this morning; his features barely recognizable thanks to whoever was responsible for beating the living shit out of him. My stomach churned with revulsion at the other minute details which included the chopping of his fingers (all ten of them), the loss of his tongue (that had been sliced off as well) and the worst of all, having Limpy butchered. It was the ultimate insult in any man's opinion; the complete degradation of whatever manhood you had left. What a way to go. No matter the terrible life he must have led before then, he was still a somewhat decent person. At least he had shown that side of himself to me if nothing else.

(and I failed you)

My fingers tightened around the handle of the umbrella as his fervent words echoed within my thudding head.

_/You'll protect me, right? You promised!/_

And what had I done? Nothing. I was so warped up in preparations for meeting Ikegami tonight, I ignored Satoshi's warnings. I tried to squash down the rising wall of guilt; telling myself that it was to be expected. The Bakufu had many enemies after all. Satoshi was just another unfortunate statistic.

So why the hell was my anger simmering by the minute as I approached the picturesque scenery of a traditional teahouse sitting in the middle of a seawater pond. My hand formed a tight fist within the pocket of my jacket as I studied the building. There was a wooden pier leading up to the teahouse which was lit up nicely. It was a little difficult to make out anyone within, but as I made my way closer, the hairs at the back of my neck bristled in awareness.

I was being watched.

If anyone chose to take me out right now, I was literally a sitting duck. Shikamaru's warnings were now buzzing within my head, and even Jiraiya's words of advice (I called him last night to keep him abreast of what was going to happen) had me worrying my lower lip. Was this really the right thing to do after all?

_You can't back down now, Naruto. You've come too damn far to give up,_ came the sudden voice that had me faltering in my steps.

(Sasuke…)

It had been so clear; it literally felt like he was standing beside me. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, hoping – in some silly way – that wherever he was, he was doing that telepathic thing we had experienced before. Could he sense the danger I was in? If so he would have shown up a couple of times already, right? Maybe it was just my overactive imagination going haywire again. That had to be it. Whenever I get too stressed out, I assume he's talking to me, trying to cheer me on the best way he knows how. I knew there had to be a simple explanation to all of this. Telepathy my ass -

I froze at the start of the pier as I noticed the towering figure approaching. I gritted my teeth and waited, knowing the protocol and yet irritated at the blatant show of distrust. I forced a grin on my visage and spread out my arms; wincing as several rain drops pelted me in greeting.

"All clean," I invited amiably. However, I was ignored (no surprise there) as he patted me down quickly but efficiently. If I had been stupid enough to carry a concealed weapon (in the obvious places) it would have been found in the blink of an eye.

"You may proceed," came the gruff command.

I gave him a mock bow and set off toward the teahouse, assuming he'd be following me like a shadow. Luckily, it looked like the bodyguard's duty was only to frisk me for he simply watched my journey without another word. At the end of the pier was the stone water-basin where I washed my hands and mouth as tradition dictated. I bent low to get through the small door and into a rustic ante-chamber where I took off my shoes and placed my umbrella in the provided stand. A smiling hostess provided me with a towel to dry myself, and with a smile of gratitude, I was ushered into the peaceful sanctuary that was a staple of most tea rooms across the country.

It was a small space, with a low ceiling and no décor to speak of except the tatami mats, a scroll hanging against the wall and a lone vase of beautiful violets (or were those azaleas? Haku would know the difference) sitting on a low table at the side of the room. The two occupants looked up as I arrived, and I immediately felt out of my place in my Western (but formal) attire. Our pretty hostess – dressed in a kimono that must have cost a fortune – smiled and bowed her head a little in acknowledgement. I reciprocated the gesture and fell to my knees, though my full attention was now on the man studying me so intently, I wondered if my pants were unzipped or worse.

_Ikegami Ryoichi, eh?_

I have seen pictures of him before, but it was one thing to see him in a photograph and another to behold the man in person. If I had thought Jiraiya was intimidating at first glance, Ikegami was twice that. He was a monster of a man, easily over six feet tall – and though he was kneeling, his head almost touched the ceiling. His features reminded me of Asuma's, in that they seemed to prefer growing their beards (and goatees) in the same way, but that was where the resemblance ended. While Asuma's eyes had been warm and kind, Ikegami's held a blank coldness that chilled my bones. While Asuma's lips could be wide and generous with its laughter, Ikegami's lips seemed to be in a perpetual downtown as if eating something sour. There was a gruesome scar which went across his left cheek and toward the left ear, as if someone had tried to slice his face off and didn't quite manage to pull it off. He had come dressed to the nines tonight; his _kimono_ and _hakama_ looking like it had been made with the finest material ever created. I could see no obvious weapons on his person, but that didn't mean he wasn't hiding it somewhere in here –

(beneath a _tatami_ mat maybe)

"It's a pleasure to finally see the famous Uzumaki Naruto," came the gruff greeting as his lips finally quirked in what I assumed was supposed to be a smile. It came out looking even more menacing.

"Likewise," I replied with a light nod.

Our hostess made a motion to remind us of the ceremony about to begin, and dutifully we kept silent; watching her dainty motions as she went about preparing the utensils before the tea-making officially began. I would list all the damn steps it took before we eventually took a single sip, but I'll spare you the agony. All I know is that it was the best damn tea I had ever tasted when all was said and done. Ikegami must have liked it too because he complimented (as I did) her skills. Blushing up a storm at the kind words, she finally excused herself and left us alone for the first time in almost an hour.

As soon as the sliding door closed behind her, I found myself wishing she'd come back.

(shit. I'm not ready for this. I'm not ready for this. I'm not fucking ready for this)

The silence in the room was deafening – or at least it would have been if not for the still sizzling sounds from the hearth where she had boiled the water for the tea. The tie around my neck suddenly felt like it was choking me, and I was sure beads of sweat were beginning to form on my face.

"You must forgive me for breaking one of your…ultimatums," he finally said after he downed the rest of his beverage. "I do require that all my guests go through a background check…so to speak…before meeting me. Standard procedure in the Underworld, but then again…" He smirked. "After hearing about all your exploits, you don't seem to be one to go according to the books. You are a strange one, Naruto."

I shrugged lightly. "Times are changing. The new generation have to do things their own way, don't you think?"

He smiled coldly. "I understand. I was like you once, so eager to break out of my father's shadow and to pave a new way of running the family business. His ways were…shall we say, archaic and naïve."

(which is why you killed my father)

I kept my expression as blank as possible, resisting the urge to tighten my hands into fists.

"I am a man of principle," he continued. "I believe in running an organization that is feared yet respected by everyone especially my rival Syndicates. For centuries, we Bakufu have maintained that tradition, of being able to walk the fine line between legitimacy and …well let's just say the unsavory side of things. But it is a necessary evil as you must have come to notice. At the end of the day, our goal is the same for any other Syndicate, to make our country a force to be reckoned with in any way possible. It's for this reason that I've come to wonder your purpose these past few months, Uzumaki Naruto." He seemed to lean forward, his entire weight almost causing the already claustrophobic room to become even more stifling. His piercing gaze searched me for a long minute, and I was never gladder for Jiraiya's tough training to keep my inner turmoil in check.

"Who sent you?" he asked calmly yet in a tone that silently stated that he demanded an answer. "Who do you work for? What is your purpose?"

I grinned then, before replying just as calmly. "Does it matter?"

His lips thinned as I leaned close to him as well. "My question to you is this…how does it feel to know that this so-called organization you're so fucking proud of seems to be crumbling right beneath your feet?"

"Just because you have control of a few meager territories does not make you a legitimate contender," he replied in a voice icy enough to freeze steam.

"Oh no no," I wagged a finger with my smirk widening. "I control most of Honshu, Ikegami-san. You know, as well as I do, that your stronghold on that region is weakening as we speak. You've lost your first lieutenant…"

"His murderer has been delivered swift justice," came the clipped response that solidified my initial thought. Ikegami was responsible for Satoshi's death after all.

"His murderer?" I asked innocently.

He smirked again. "Yes. The man you have spent so many weeks courting and dealing with behind the scenes. The fool felt he could eliminate a loyal and trusted member just because of his wife's infidelity." At this, his features contorted as if in pain. "My…beloved Ayame-chan…murdered by that son of a bitch!"

He pounded a fist on the _tatami_ mat, and I gave an exaggerated sigh of suffering.

"So you really believe Satoshi was behind this? What proof do you have?"

"I do not need any proof," came the expected reply that almost had me reaching out to strangle him there and then. "Satoshi was becoming weak -"

"And this was as good an excuse as any to eliminate him, correct?"

Not waiting for his answer, I lifted a hand to my head, which immediately garnered a narrowing of his eyes at my action. I had to give him props for not flinching any more than that, although the quick (blink-and-you-just-might-miss-it) glance he threw to his left, let me know that he definitely had something there – either a weapon or a spy behind the screen, I'd soon find out.

"It's all right," I said aloud as I pulled out the tiny device I had hidden carefully. It was a good thing the rain hadn't screwed it up or it would have ruined my carefully laid-out plans. It was a recorder – one of the more fancy devices that were small enough to fit in the palm of your hand.

"What is this?" he asked warily.

"Oh just a little something I happened to overhear your precious Miyazaki-san saying a few weeks ago…before his untimely demise that is."

He scowled as I activated the device, and soon enough the raspy voice of Ikegami's ex-first lieutenant filled the small room. It was clear that wherever this was recorded (probably a restaurant), it was almost hard to make out what the main characters were saying in some places, but the main gist of the conversation was still understandable. Hitotsu (#1) had done the best he could to get this recorded, so all credit to him. As to the voices on the tape, well, I'll just let them speak for themselves.

**Miyazaki:** …for your assistance in getting the money. We will begin sending the shipment to Okinawa, where I hope to meet with the buyers from (unintelligible) … in the interim…have you given consideration (unintelligible)… Shimura-dono?

**Danzo (yes, that Danzo):** You are too impatient. Your time will come…(unintelligible)…gather a trusted team who you can rely on to make sure your coup is a success?

**Miyazaki:** Yes. I have assembled (he listed several names here, where each caused Ikegami's already strained features to become paler and paler in disbelief). Ikegami-dono plans to travel to Singapore next month. We will work hard on recruiting (unintelligible)…and his execution carried out (unintelligible)

**Danzo:** Is Satoshi aware of this?

**Miyazaki:** (a snort of derision) Yes. My mistake as he seemed against it. He is becoming more pathetic and once Ikegami is taken care of…he's next…fzzzzz!

I watched the device suddenly crushed within a large hand as if it were nothing more than a bug. He flung the shattered pieces to a corner of the room. Ikegami was breathing heavily, his eyes twin flashes of fury that stared blindly at nothing in particular.

"Those bastards…those sons-of-bitches!" came the roar that almost took my ears off.

"What's the use of yelling?" I chided. "Surely the very idea of a mutiny amongst your subordinates shouldn't be such a surprise, should it? It's something that's been going on for…centuries." I grinned at the thunderous visage before me. "After all you said it yourself earlier…when there's a need for change, you do everything you can to make it happen."

"Shut up…!"

"Must be especially difficult knowing that Shimura Danzo's behind all this as well, eh?" I tsked and shook my head as if disappointed. "He was your partner in crime if I'm not mistaken?"

"Shimura Danzo is dead to me," Ikegami snapped. "He's been dead to me for a long time and he knows it. I've always known that bastard could never be trusted and he's proven it –yet again –to me with this latest stunt." He laughed bitterly. "He's always wanted to be the head of the Syndicate, and I now realize that he was using me all this time to get to the top!"

"How do you mean?" I asked with my brows raised as if hearing this news for the first time.

Ikegami sneered. "My father – dear ol' Dad – who wanted to transform the Bakufu into a legitimate organization had the foolish idea to choose someone else instead of me as the next head of the Syndicate!"

As the memories came rushing back, he bit hard into his fisted hand 'til I was sure he would break the skin. And though my features still remained sufficiently interested, my heart was doing the exact opposite. I was finally about to hear it from the horse's mouth; the real reason why my father was executed for no damn good reason. However, Ikegami seemed to come to his senses and he stopped talking. He eyed me coldly.

"Did he send you too?" came the sudden question that threw me off kilter for a second.

"Did who send me?" I asked carefully.

"Danzo!" Ikegami bellowed. "He sent you, didn't he? You're one of his spies, aren't you? I should have known!"

He suddenly dove for me, the large hands reaching out to possibly wrap around my neck, but I was already one step ahead of him. I swerved to the side and grabbed the wooden spoon our hostess had used to serve us tea earlier, and scooping up some of the coal - which I hoped was still hot - I flung it in his direction, not caring if it connected with his face or not. However, his sharp cry of pain was muffled with his hands covering his face and him falling onto his back – in a rather awkward angle. You've got to remember that the damn room was small to begin with and one barely had enough space to be involved in a fucking fight.

Aware that his cronies might come barging in at the sound of his cry, I crawled over to him and slapped a hand over his mouth. Or would have if something didn't come flying out of the corner of my eye to send me sprawling across the other side of the room. It would take me a moment later (with my head now throbbing and the undeniable dribble of blood now flowing from the cut) to realize that Ikegami had delivered a blow so hard that I literally saw stars.

_Fuck that hurt._

"You've grossly underestimated who you are dealing with, Uzumaki Naruto," Ikegami stated as he rose to his feet. With the stain of the coal upon his face, he looked like he had crawled out from the depths of Hell. "I've been watching you from the wings, trying to understand just where you came from and why you've suddenly gained so much power and fame in such a short period, and it all came down to one thing. Shimura Danzo. In this quest to take complete control, he's gone out of his way to not only stage a mutiny, but hired you to kill me. Well, I am not the _kumichō_ of the feared Bakufu Syndicate for nothing, young man. I will have the distinct pleasure of torturing you to death before delivering pieces of your carcass to your beloved master."

I watched as he withdrew the _wakizashi_ from within his robes and I smirked lightly. Of course. Did I actually believe he'd come without a weapon of his choice? Still, I'm surprised that none of his guards have come to rescue him yet. I had noticed him glance toward the left side of the room again, and my assumption was that he had something hidden there. If not then…

"If you confess," Ikegami was saying. "Perhaps I'll go a little easier on you. All you have to do is renounce your affiliation with that old fool, denounce your allegiance to the pitiful Mibu Syndicate and come with me."

I raised a brow at this.

"Surprised that I changed my mind so quickly?" Ikegami smirked. "Actually, let's just say that I envy your talent. You have a natural leadership that I admire in a man. You could easily replace my beloved ex-first lieutenant and who knows? When I decide to retire, you'll be in charge of everything…as you've always wanted anyway."

I lowered my head as the first bubble of hysteria began to rise to the surface. Soon enough, it became full-blown laughter which had Ikegami's eyes narrowing warily.

"If you'd like to share the joke…?" he growled.

"Me?" I snorted. "Work for you?" I spat in his direction, and now it was my turn to sneer. "Not even if you were the last fucked up asshole on the planet."

I couldn't have struck him any harder verbally, and his ire was so great, he had to take only a single step to reach me. The _wakizashi_ was swung and it probably would have sliced off my head if I didn't duck just in time while rolling toward that section I was sure Ikegami had been looking at earlier. I felt the _tatami_ mat for any loose end, but had to roll aside again as the bastard came after me. This time tendrils of my hair fell to the floor, and I knew I was flirting dangerously with Death. Desperate, I kicked out, cursing as I missed. Fortunately, his clothing choice made it a little difficult to move and he ended up tripping a little, which was more than enough time for me to finally pry off the loose mat.

_Yes!_

"No!" he roared just as I grabbed the ornate pistol and held it in both hands to point it toward him; hammer cocked and ready to offload a bullet to his soot-stained face.

"Oh? Just what do you intend to do then, Uzumaki Naruto? Shoot me? Go ahead if you dare, young man. You are surrounded," he stated quietly with a smirk. "You will never leave here alive, so even if you had the balls to kill me, I'll still make sure your carcass is delivered to Danzo ridden with so many bullet holes, it will be hard to recognize you."

"Just like you did to my father all those years ago, right?" I asked coldly.

He frowned at that and then dared to look amused. "Oh? So that's all this was? Revenge for your father? Who was he? Some moron who gambled away the family money and owed us but was unable to pay his dues? Is that it? This is some stupid revenge? Oh give me a fucking brea -!"

"_I am the son of Namikaze Minato, motherfucker_!" I interrupted furiously and fired before the surprise could register fully on his features.

I didn't want him dead yet, and I was glad Ikegami had the foresight to attach a muffler to the pistol or I was sure the deafening sound of the gunshot would have had his cronies running in. I watched him stagger to his knee…his good one…as I had shot through his right.

"Mina…Minato…" he gasped in disbelief; those dark eyes filled with bemusement as if not quite sure of what to make of this sudden declaration. "Not…not possible…I don't…believe it…"

"Believe it, you bastard," I growled as I rose to my feet to tower over him. "He sent me from the grave to finish up what you started all those years ago."

I watched him feebly try to swing at me with the _wakizashi_, but I kicked it aside with a strike to this wrist and stamped hard on it until I was sure I had broken the bones there. Pity I was barefoot or it would have made more of an impact. But beggars can't be choosers and as he made to move again, I blew out his other knee, listening to his groan of agony with a coldness that would have made Sergei proud.

"Twenty-years ago, you ordered his assassination," I began quietly; as the pain and fury I had felt all those months ago at Buk-gu – when finally learning the truth – came rushing back to the surface. "Twenty-years ago, you and Shimura Danzo were not content enough to simply let him run away in peace, you wanted him completely eliminated from existence and you succeeded…barely."

I fell to my knees beside him and cupped his jaw, squeezing it hard as I watched the tears of fear (anger? Frustration? Who gives a fuck) fill his eyes.

"You should have made sure you took out every damn member of the Namikaze family, Ikegami-san. That was the first mistake you and that sick fuck, Danzo, made. You failed to cover all your bases and now…it's come back to bite you in the ass. Karma's such a bitch, ain't she?"

"You…you won't…leave…here…alive…" he croaked. I think he was trying to laugh, but I didn't want to know. I had just about had enough of his yakking. I stuck the pistol into his mouth and cocked the hammer again.

"I knew your nephew…Kojima Masataka, do you know that?"

His eyes widened again, which made me smile.

"He was supposed to be a big brother to me, and maybe…if things had gone the way he wanted, I might have really ended up working with you without ever knowing the truth. Funny how things turn out in the end, eh?" I buried the pistol deeper still until I was sure it was now hitting the back of his throat. The gurgling sound he made was evidence enough.

"He hated you, Ikegami-san, and I think he was damn glad I killed him instead of having to die at your hands. You brutally assassinated my father. You left me and my mother to die. You denied me a proper childhood. You ruined my goddamn life, and yet…I've got a lot to thank you for too. Because you see, if you hadn't sold me to Byaku-Shinkyou, I wouldn't have met and made friends with some of the most amazing people. Oh yes. I have a great new family now. So…thanks for that at least."

I released his jaw, but only to slap his cheek gently as if petting him for a job well done. I noticed a twitch from my periphery. He was trying to reach out for the _wakizashi_ he had dropped to the floor earlier, but I was too fast for him. I reached for the sword and swiftly buried it into his outstretched palm effectively pinning him to the _tatami_ mat. He would have howled in pain, but there was a gun still in his mouth, remember? He had to settle for more tears streaming out of his eyes.

"The _yakuza_ will go on without you," I stated calmly. "Don't you worry. It might not be the supreme organization it once was, but it will survive without your presence to pollute the scene. Once your body is found, it will make the news sure. Danzo will probably go on television and blab some shit about doing all he could to make sure scum like you were eliminated, and he'll try to get into the public's good graces, but things won't go as planned for him. I can guarantee you that. He's next and like you, I'm going to drill a few home truths into that thick skull of his. I hope you two have a wonderful time in Hell."

I finally pulled the trigger, though I did have to at least give the man some credit for going down with defiance in his eyes. A badass _kumichō_ to the end, eh? Pity I'd have a hard time explaining why my clothes were all bloodied and why my left eye now seemed to be dimming with every blink. Still, as I rose to my feet to eye the splattered brains and pool of blood now forming around the immobile body, the enormity of what I had done was slowly beginning to sink in.

I had just killed the most feared and powerful man in the Underworld. I knew I ought to be satisfied that this part of my mission was complete, but all I felt in this moment was a pleasant numbness. It was the kind that would have had me collapsing to my knees to contemplate what I had done (just like what took place after killing Kojima), when Ikegami's warning came back to me with a vengeance.

_/You'll never leave here alive./_

(fuck!)

He was right. How did I hope to get out of here if I walked out in this state? Or remained here admiring my handiwork? The only way to leave the teahouse was to walk across the pier or swim, and though I could take my chances diving into the shallow waters of the pond, it was likely his men would rain enough bullets to take me out. My only hope was that Shika and his team would be ready to retaliate the moment they attacked.

"I'll just have to take my chances," I whispered as I crouched and carefully made my way out of the tearoom and into the ante-chamber. I pressed myself against the wall and held my breath, my heartbeat thudding so loud I was sure everyone in the damn city could hear it. I hoped our hostess wouldn't make the dumb decision to return just to find out "if everything was okay", but to my growing chagrin, I was only met with an unnerving eerie silence…well aside from the rain.

(maybe that's why they didn't come…the rain must have blocked the sounds of the scuffle inside)

I counted inwardly to ten and then slowly slid the _shoji_ screen door open. The sudden gust of wind and cooling sensation of raindrops upon my heated skin was a blessing and yet curse. If anyone was to pounce on me in this condition, I wouldn't be able to stop them as quickly as I could.

_Fuck it. Just make a run for it, Naruto. Don't think. Don't think. Don't think._ I took a deep breath, prayed for a fervent second before dashing across the pier as fast as I could manage it. The sudden rumble of thunder had my heart echoing the sound, and when the lightning flashed, it was so fucking bright, even the blind could have noticed my mad sprint.

I would have kept on running like an insane lunatic, if I suddenly didn't trip over something hard and unexpected in my path. I fell flat to the muddy ground with a loud grunt, desperately reaching for the pistol that had slipped out of my hand. With the weapon in my grasp, I spun around in panic – breath hitching, adrenaline pumping and ready to blow any other unfortunate soul to smithereens - only to blink in confusion at the prone figure on the ground.

_What the…?_

It was the bodyguard who had frisked me earlier and as I nudged him warily with a leg, it was clear to see that he wouldn't be getting up again anytime soon.

I staggered to my feet and ran toward the exits, noticing with growing amazement that there were a few more bodies scattered here and there. All men in suits; men who had been with Ikegami. It would explain why no one had bothered us while we were in the teahouse. Shikamaru and his team must have flushed them out.

Fucking impressive if you asked me.

And I would have run right on through the gates, if the sudden hand on my wrist didn't stall me in my tracks. On autopilot, I raised the pistol to whoever was responsible, ready to send another bullet into my attacker, when I met the oh-so-familiar face that nearly had me bursting with tears of gratitude and relief.

"Shika!" I cried out as the thunder rumbled again.

"The car's over here!" he yelled back and tugged me to follow him, where I was promptly shoved into the backseat of the waiting Sedan we had arrived in. He slid in beside me and ordered the driver to get moving. I looked up it was Roku riding shotgun and Mittsu behind the wheel. This was Shika's 'team' apparently. They both turned to look at me with smug smiles on their visages.

(job well done, fellas…though we've got some clean-up to do. I've left so many fingerprints in that damn place, they'll probably come looking for me first thing in the morning)

"You guys kick ass," I praised aloud instead with a thumbs up. "Thanks."

I glanced at my friend who was already digging around for the first aid kit to take care of my bleeding.

"Thanks," I said again in case he hadn't heard me, but in typical Shika fashion, he only shook his head and motioned for me to turn my head. I obeyed but just in time to see that he wasn't as calm and collected as he let on. His trembling hands told the story and his muttered curse as he dropped the band aid made it even more evident.

I reached out to clasp his hand gently.

"Almost over, Shika," I said quietly as I squeezed those strong hands in reassurance. "It's going to be all over soon. I promise."

"I hope for your sake it is," came the troubled reply as those dark eyes searched me for a long minute.

"Why do you say that?"

"…he's back," came the barely audible reply. "Danzo's returned and he's looking for you. I think…I think he knows who you really are now, Naruto."

_(fuck)_

Guess taking out Danzo is going to happen much sooner than I had planned. But no matter. I'll be ready for him when the time comes.

_Just you wait for me, you son-of-a-bitch. Just you wait for me…_


	41. 41: A Price for Devotion

**Notes:** My sincere thanks to everyone who left a comment on the last chapter and a warm hello to my newest readers! *waves* I really appreciate your encouragement and patience. Phew! Lots of fighting going on, folks, so hang on to your pantaloons. I think the great big climax (no pun intended *lol*) with both men (and yes, they are men now no longer 'boys') will take place in the next chapter….and no I don't mean the 'happily-ever-after' thing. This chapter's got some things to make you think about a couple of things!

Enjoy! And as always know that your feedback/comments are my Gatorade. Love y'all!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 41<strong>

**A Price for Devotion**

_If remembering me_

_Will for him in future years_

_Be too difficult,_

_It would be well this very day_

_That I should end my life._

_**Gido Sanshi no Haha**_

* * *

><p><strong>Byaku-Shinkyou<strong>

**Hokkaido Prefecture**

Always graceful in flight, Jūgo watched its arrival and slowly raised an outstretched finger to allow the tiny sparrow to descend upon it. As it 'spoke', his heart fell although a part of him was aware that this new development shouldn't have come as a surprise. Hadn't their mission from the start been a risky one? Wasn't everyday a lesson in patience and fear; knowing that any false move could be the difference between success or a death execution? Hadn't his decision to become intimate with a childhood friend been doomed from the moment their first kiss was shared? He knew Itachi hadn't required him to go this far, but how could he resist? How could he make anyone (read as Kiba and Suigetsu) understand just how much he loved Kimimaro despite his oh-so-many flaws? How could he show them the memories of his childhood; of the young man who had laughed and smiled so effortlessly at every little thing Jūgo shared with him?

So what if the man today was a stranger to that emotion? So what if he had been the second-in-command to a villain so despicable even mentioning his name made Jūgo shiver in disgust? So what if the one he loved had such blind devotion to said villain and was too stubborn to want to see reason? Jūgo believed in that one thing called 'hope' and perhaps redemption. It might be a naïve trait to have considering the business he was in, but there had to be a little bit of good in everyone (although he was beginning to have doubts about Orochimaru's 'goodness'). It was why he held on to that thinning thread when it came to Kimimaro. He would continue to hold on for as long as it took, and even if it meant having to die…

/ "Do you fear death?"/

/ "No. If you are the one responsible for it...then I will not fear death." /

/ "You are so naïve." /

/ "I don't care -" /

/ "I could kill you if I wanted to -" /

/ "Then I'll die for you, my love." /

(he sighed miserably at the memory of that conversation)

…he wouldn't want it to end in any other way.

However as he was about to offer the sparrow a tiny crumb on the tip of his finger, a sudden **BOOM**! – so loud and thunderous that it literally shook the very ground he stood on – had the bird quivering in fright and taking off into the darkening skies.

Jūgo – on autopilot – placed a hand upon his _katana_ in readiness, but was knocked to the snow-covered ground as the explosion went off again even louder and closer than before.

_Shit! Are we under attack?! _

A third explosion went off and there was no mistaking it now. The explosions were coming from _within_ the grounds, and with the added cacophony of screaming prisoners and officers yelling at each other to take their positions, Jūgo had an inkling of who might be responsible for this.

"Don't they learn?" he hissed beneath his breath as he staggered to his feet and began to make his way toward the main grounds. If it turned out that Suigetsu was responsible, Jūgo had a good mind to personally pummel the foolish silver-haired man to a pulp. Itachi-san had given specific instructions not to –

"Where are you going?" came the sudden cry as a hand fell upon his shoulder from behind.

Now wired up with adrenaline, Jūgo spun around to strike to find it was the very man of his thoughts panting breathlessly behind him. Suigetsu looked…

_(insane)_

"What the hell are you doing?!" Jūgo roared as a stampede of frightened prisoners began to head their way. No easy task as many slipped and fell into the layer of snow accumulated throughout the day. It must have been at least three inches deep, and considering many were not exactly dressed adequately for the weather, they slid and got trampled on easily.

"Don't look at me!" Suigetsu replied with his hands thrown up in the air. He grinned; a grotesque sight to match the blood stains on his pale features and uniform. He began to laugh almost maniacally. "This time around, you can't blame me for this. I think our boys out there are close by – either that or someone in here has the same idea as us. Come on! Let's go find Kiba!"

Not waiting to see if Jūgo followed him or not, Suigetsu led the way toward the administrative offices, while Jūgo did his best to keep up. It was difficult as some prisoners – too panic stricken and terrified – clung desperately to his uniform screaming "Help us! We don't want to die! Get us out of here!" Jūgo was torn; between wanting to help the innocent (well all things considered they were 'innocent' in this situation) prisoners and needing to see where and what the hell Suigetsu was up, he tried his best to usher them in the direction of the gates. And perhaps he would have succeeded if the sudden bloodcurdling screams somewhere ahead didn't send chills down his spine.

_What the hell is going on…?_

"Get back to your goddamn houses!" came the yells from irate officers – loyalists to Orochimaru no doubt – who were trying to do the exact opposite of Jūgo's intentions. A series of gunshots soon rang out and more screams of terror ricocheted in the air including the anguished cry of someone going "I've been shot! I've been shot! Oh God! Help me!" Jūgo watched in horror as an officer practically stomped upon the dying man with a boot-clad foot until he screamed no more. The dead prisoner was then unceremoniously kicked to the side as yet more gunshots filled the air.

_This is…this is madness!_ Jūgo thought frantically, as he took in the stomach-churning sight of pinkish-red snow all around him. _This is absolute carnage! Itachi-sama…what the hell do we do now?_

He grit his teeth as he watched another officer tug a prisoner's _yukata_, but instead of simply pushing him back toward the residential area, he was repeatedly stabbed in his abdomen with a _katana_. Jūgo could feel the gradual well of anger within the pit of his stomach. He had vowed to not do anything rash until the cue was given, but this was too much. Even he had his limits and this time…_this time_ that son-of-a-bitch and his cronies were not going to be forgiven.

"Get away from them!" he bellowed and swung with all his might. The officer would have just enough time to look up with bemusement on his features before his head went soaring into the night sky. Jūgo whipped out his pistol to take out another officer who had just begun beating a prisoner with a heavy _bokken_, all the while being careful not to eliminate any prisoner by accident. In fact, the more Jūgo looked, the more he realized that some more officers were going down and it had nothing to do with him. Some prisoners – who were no longer going to take the abuse anymore – had begun to turn the tables and were in full fight mode; ready and willing to take down anyone wearing the damned Watchdog uniform.

_Not good,_ Jūgo thought quickly as he began to shrug out of the tell-tale _kataginu_. He would be just in time as a prisoner was rushing madly toward him; blood-streaked and with pure hate in his eyes. Jūgo barely raised his arm to block the incoming blow, and using the handle of his _katana_, he struck the prisoner's ribs, while screaming into the flushed features, "I'm on your side! I'm on your goddamn side!"

But he might have been talking to a brick wall for all the impact this made. The prisoner was too far gone in his need for revenge that he came for Jūgo again, even more ferociously than before. He probably would have succeeded in doing some damage, if the sudden appearance of the tip of a _katana_ through his open mouth didn't have Jūgo doing a double-take in shock. A light grunt proceeded this as the _katana_ was swiftly withdrawn and the dead prisoner slumped to the ground.

"Let's go!" Kiba commanded, while tugging on Jūgo's hand to pull him to his feet. "Suigetsu's making his way to Orochimaru's quarters. The bastard wants to take him out himself!"

"He's going to die!" Jūgo yelled back as he and Kiba ducked and weaved past the chaos. "Is he crazy?"

"Don't ask!" Kiba replied, though from the strained expression on his visage, it was clear that the thought had crossed his mind as well. He swung his _katana_ at an officer who was about to stop them, while Jūgo took out another with a well-aimed shot at his forehead.

"Who started the explosions?" Jūgo asked.

"I have no clue," Kiba replied. "We think it's probably some prisoners, but we can't be sure. Whatever it is…we've got to finish this tonight! GET DOWN!"

He shoved Jūgo into a hedge as the bullets rained all around them. _Shit!_ He had forgotten about the stationed snipers on the rooftops especially when one got closer to Orochimaru's domain. Just how the hell had Suigetsu managed to get past them? If he had that is. Kiba winced as the shooting continued, this time there were dying screams as some (foolish) prisoners had tried to make their way toward this side of the grounds as well.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck!" he hissed. This was not looking good at all.

Jūgo motioned for him to be silent as he fell onto his stomach and began to slither along the snow-covered ground as quietly as he could. For a big guy, Kiba had to give it to him. Jūgo had been one of the best during stealth exercises at training after all. He followed as quietly as he could, keeping to the shadows as the snipers focused on the newcomers. Or would have if a bullet didn't nearly take off his left ear. Kiba winced and kept still, feeling the warmth of his blood pooling into his ear and down his cheek from the painful graze by the deadly weapon.

"You okay?" Jūgo whispered harshly.

"Yea…yeah," Kiba replied with a weak smile. "Keep going. I'm still here."

Jūgo nodded and continued his slow crawl; his heart jackhammering within his chest as every move was like a beacon to the sharp-eyed men on the roof who could see everything. At least if he and Kiba continued to stay close to the shadows, they would be fine. There was only a few feet left to the safety of one of the doors leading into the main temple.

_Just…a…few…more…_

"Not so fast, officer," came the low drawl as a boot-clad foot stepped and crushed his fingers without preamble. Jūgo sucked in his breath as white hot pain flared through him. He looked up with an effort to see the smug features of one of Orochimaru's cronies – Sakon. And from the low cry behind him, Ukon – his twin – had gotten the best of Kiba.

"Two more fish to add to the catch," Ukon crooned in delight as he dragged a nearly comatose Kiba to his feet. Jūgo would have just enough time to notice that Kiba had been knocked out with a blow to his temple, when he felt another flash of brilliant pain at the back of his head before he was enclosed in complete and welcome darkness.

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke:<em>

At the faint but unmistakable sound of the first explosion, our horses neighed and fretted in protest, forcing Haku and I to come to a reluctant stop. In tense silence, we watched the gradual rise of billowing gray clouds while struggling to control the excited beast beneath me.

_(what the hell is going on?)_

"…Sasuke-sama?"

Haku's voice quivered slightly, though his expression was concentrated on the scenario before us. We were not too far from Byaku-Shinkyou as the familiar stretch of road leading to the famed gates yawned before us as if in cold invitation.

_(welcome back, Sasuke-sama. Won't you come right in to see what disaster awaits?) _

I tightened my grip on the reins, frowning as a gamut of confused and worrisome thoughts raced through my mind. Were we too late? Had Orochimaru's madness gotten to the point of him deciding to destroy the entire place as the ultimate revenge? If that was the case…

_(goddamnit!)_

"Let's move, Haku," I commanded through clenched teeth.

With a swift kick on my horse's sides, we galloped toward the jaws of Death, or if I was lucky – the arms of Redemption. I wondered if the others following behind had heard the explosions as well and were quickening their pace, for goodness knew I would definitely need more than Haku for backup if things had escalated this quickly. I couldn't imagine just what was happening within my grounds, but the sounds of yet another explosion did not help my cause at all.

_Stop destroying my home, you bastard!_ I screamed within as the towering gates began to loom in our sights.

I withdrew my _katana_; throwing quick glances at the guard towers stationed at either end of the walls surrounding the compound. Usually there were at least three guards in each – snipers to be more exact – to make sure people like Haku and I didn't come barging in to cause trouble. However, it seemed like our dear guards had their hands full as I noticed their attention was not trained in our direction, but in the opposite. They seemed to be shooting at people within the grounds, and from the terrified screams and cries now drifting toward Haku and I, it didn't take a rocket scientist to realize that those fuckers were mass-murdering panicked prisoners wishing to escape.

"Haku!"

"I got it, Sasuke-sama!" he yelled back as he promptly leapt into action, knowing damn well that his pinpoint accuracy with the throwing knives was never more needed at this point. From the corner of my eye, I watched him jump off his horse and throw at the same time. Two knives reached their targets on the left tower, while the third was still too busy re-loading his rifle. He would not have enough time to process just why his companions were no longer helping him as the third knife lodged itself on his upper arm, forcing him to drop his weapon with an agonized cry of pain.

I leapt off my horse, making sure I grabbed what I needed before slapping its rear in an indication that it was no longer needed. Haku was already making his way toward the right tower when the first whizz of bullets flew by me to lodge themselves in the snow. I cursed and looked up to notice that the right tower guards – at least one of them – had noticed Haku and I and was now probably bound to alert the guards at the front gate. However, just as he was about to raise the radio to his lips to give the signal, Haku's throwing knife knocked the equipment out of his grip. Another was soon buried within the guard's forehead, giving me enough time to make my way toward the heaving gates.

I say 'heaving' because it literally looked that way. The prisoners trying to escape were doing their best to push it open from within, while the overwhelmed guards outside could do nothing but try to hold them back as best they could. The funny thing is that the gates are usually barricaded with the strongest of steel and thick wooden panels, which on any given day would have been impossible for any man to push. However, the architects had never considered the weight of more than a hundred (or more) men all pushing at the same time, and I could only watch in mild fascination as the strain of all that force began to slowly make an impact.

"Sasuke-sama?" Haku panted beside me as he ran back to my side to watch what was taking place. "What do we…?"

I silenced him with a raised hand and marched toward the four guards screaming at the irate crowd within to "stay back or they'll be shot!" I recognized them; two soldiers I had trained while the other two were new faces I had never seen before. Either way, there was an element of terror and confusion on their flushed faces, and when one of them finally turned around to notice me, the expression slowly became one of astonishment and dare I say…relief?

"Sas…Sasuke-sama?" he asked in a hushed whisper that was barely audible amongst the cacophony. "Is that really you, Sasuke-sama?!"

His question finally had the other three turning around in bemusement, and just like the first guard, their jaws dropped in disbelief. To my embarrassment, one of the men I had trained immediately burst into tears and made an attempt to run into my arms, but I pushed him back and shook my head.

"Control yourself, Fuu-san," I ordered firmly. "This is not the time or place for sentimental reunions." At my chiding, he nodded fervently and struggled to gather himself. The new guards weren't too taken by my presence as they took threatening steps before me, but Haku positioned himself in front of me and I didn't need to see his expression as the guards seemed to shrink back a little.

"What's going on in there?" I asked as the gates strained even more and the voices grew louder and more shrill. I could now hear the sounds of more gunshots and more screams. I hated to see what the view was going to be like when the gates were finally opened.

"We have no idea, Sasuke-sama," Fuu replied with panic in his tone. "We were just at our stations as normal and then all of a sudden…BOOM! An explosion inside! We tried to radio in for confirmation on whether it had something to do with a broken pipe or gas leak or something, but no one could tell us exactly what happened. And then…!"

"…we heard all the pandemonium inside," the older one – Tsubasa – chimed in with his story. "We've been trying to hold them back now, but it's no use. They might knock the gates down soon if we don't do something, Sasuke-sama."

"LET US OUT! LET US OUT! LET US OUT!" the chants and cries continued incessantly, and the four guards looked back and then to me, now clearly afraid and relying on me to save their hides. I closed my eyes for a second, my grip tightening on the _katana_ as if hoping to draw strength from it. I tried to even my breathing, to steady the steady _thud thud thud_ of my heartbeat as I pictured someone who – under any other circumstance – I would have welcomed as my companion in this battle.

_(if you were here, Naruto…what would you do?)_

LET US OUT! LET US OUT! LET US OUT!

_(you know exactly what you ought to do, Sasuke. Now stop fucking around and get this damn show on the road)_

Ah, how I've missed hearing that voice even if I'm sure it's just my subconscious conjuring up Naruto's response as if he were actually here.

I lifted my lashes and took a deep breath, before looking at each guard in the eye to ask succinctly.

"Where do your loyalties lie?"

I would have laughed at the sudden jaw drops this elicited, but I was in no mood for that particular reaction. I frowned as they seemed indecisive and I asked again; louder this time.

"Where do your loyalties lie?"

Fuu was the first to break rank as he stepped forward and replied firmly. "With you, Sasuke-sama!" He ignored the looks thrown at him from the newer officers as Tsubasa joined him with a simple nod. "It's always been with you, Sasuke-sama. We were just too cowardly to join the others who escaped, but we're not making that mistake this time."

"You traitors!" one of the new guards cried out and dashed toward Fuu, but Tsubasa was quicker as he whipped out his pistol to send a bullet right between the officer's eyes. He trained the gun on the other as if hoping to take him out as well, but this one was already whimpering and surrendering.

"Right. I'm glad to see we're all in accord," I said with a firm nod. "Now listen to me. I want you to activate the gates -"

"It's going to be mayhem," Fuu began in protest, but I shook my head and placed a hand of reassurance on his shoulder.

"Trust me…let them go. What's the use of keeping them within at this point? Whatever is going on in there, I need a clear path to get inside, and that's not going to be possible with so many prisoners blocking my way, is it?"

Tsubasa nodded in understanding and motioned for Fuu and the other guard to help him.

"Take off your jackets," I called out as they dashed toward the machinery where several levers had to be pushed and pulled. "You know the prisoners will head straight for you if they see you still in uniform."

They didn't need to be told that twice. They couldn't shrug out of the heavy jackets fast enough, and burying them within the snow, they clumped back to the equipment; clouds of smoke billowing from their mouths as the chill of the night air began to set into their bones. Haku and I stepped away from the direct path of the road and hid behind the low wall adjacent to the much higher one. We watched as Tsubasa gave the order and the familiar grinding and groaning sound of those massive gates – as ancient as Time itself – began to swing open ever so slowly.

In much more peaceful times, the 'ceremony' of such a thing would have given one a grand view of the temple within heralded by a garden and lawns capable of taking your breath away. However, on this cold, bitter and death-stained night, instead of seeing green lawns and a kaleidoscope of colors, we were greeted with the ghastly sight of piles of dead bodies amidst the lucky survivors already dashing out through the little space created by the still opening gates.

Haku's low cry of anguish was muffled as he slapped a hand over his mouth, while I could only stare in numbed shock at the carnage before me. Perhaps the old me would not have felt an ounce of pity for the men now turning blue from the cold, neither would he have thought much of how dark red the snow had become around said men, but not today and perhaps never again. The new me was appalled and sickened to his stomach, and more than dimly aware that in some strange way, he was partly responsible for all of this. If only he had seen Orochimaru's madness before it got out of hand, if only he had been strong enough to stop the man in his tracks while he still had a chance, none of this would have happened.

I watched – as if in slow motion – as a prisoner who had just managed to escape and was about to give a strangled cry of victory, immediately slump to earth with a gurgled cry as a bullet passed through his heart. Several others were limping; glazed expressions of delirious joy on their features as they tried to soak in the realization that they were free. And perhaps they would have joined the fate of their fellow dead prisoners if Haku didn't galvanize into action to throw his knives at the officers responsible for still shooting down prisoners from within the grounds.

It was my cue to stop musing about what is and what shouldn't be as I rose to my feet and dashed toward my version of Hell. Fuu and Tsubasa were quick to join, and from the expression on their faces, I knew it was going to be of no use to try to talk them out of it. If they were determined to fight with me to the death, then so be it.

"Goddamnit," Tsubasa grumbled as we had to maneuver our way past the pileup. "What madness is this?!"

I was quick to notice that it wasn't just prisoners among the dead, but several officers too (not including the ones Haku took out).

More prisoners were dashing toward the gates – like school children finally being released for the summer holidays. In their tow were more officers, many of them swinging away freely, chopping off limbs or shooting randomly with the hope of adding to their body count. I tried to blend in with the chaos, while targeting the officers responsible and inflicting just as much pain as they had caused to others.

I must admit that it felt good to use my _katana_ again, and though I had feared I'd be a little rusty after months of being laid off, there was a dull thrill at the sight of the sharp blade piercing through flesh and neatly slicing away at a head or arm or leg.

No one would recognize me for I had the hood of my cloak over my head again (and the flurries were getting a little heavier now by the way, so visibility was bound to be shot quite soon) and as I made my way further into the grounds, I could feel the hairs at the back of my neck prickling with awareness.

_(he's watching me)_

"Urgh." I ducked as several bullets whizzed by, rolling along the icy ground before finding solace behind the walls of the _dojo_ I had taught so many students over the years. It pained me to see the bullet holes on the sacred building, but this was no time to mull over architectural destruction.

_(he's watching me)_

My goal was to get to Orochimaru's quarters as soon as possible, though I would have been a fool not to notice the growing queasiness in the pit of my stomach. The stench of smoke, gas and hot oil filled the air as I drew closer, and if my theory was correct, the explosions had probably taken place around the residential quarters for the officers. I had to wonder if a prisoner was responsible for this or if some rebel officers had decided to take matters into their own hands. At this point, I was beginning to doubt Orochimaru's involvement with the attack. Though it might have seemed plausible – at the start – that he'd want to destroy Byaku-Shinkyou, just stepping into his 'territory' was a reminder of just how much he loved this place in his own sick way.

_(but then again, hadn't I been naïve enough to believe he had nothing to do with the death of my parents all those years ago? I really can't give him the benefit of the doubt)_

It was less chaotic here and I could see why. Among the dead bodies I passed, most of them had been taken out by bullets – an indication that Orochimaru's snipers were on high alert. Fuu and Tsubasa had offered to watch my back, but I must have lost them in another skirmish with some guards and prisoners. I had almost forgotten Haku was with me, until his hand fell upon my shoulder to stop me in mid-stride. I turned to him with a raised brow. Like me, his head was partially covered with the hood of his cloak, but there was no mistaking the strained expression on his pale features.

"What's the matter?" I asked in a low whisper.

"Look…up there…"

I did.

With their figures making stark dark silhouettes against the night sky, several resourceful prisoners were silently making their way along the rooftops where the snipers were stationed. I watched in horrified fascination as a prisoner jumped onto the back of a sniper, and with the quick motion of his hand, it was clear he slit the throat of the officer. All around the quadrangle, the surprise ambushes were taking place. I wasn't sure of the ratio of prisoners to officers now, but with the way things were going, I had a feeling that there would be no more uniformed guards left. I was loathe to see if the hardcore men in the East Block had been released. If that was the case, there was really going to be no hope for anyone foolish enough to still be wearing a uniform.

"Come on, Haku," I whispered as I led the way across the courtyard and toward an area I never thought I'd get to see again in my life.

Nothing much had changed, and as I passed familiar gilded statues and pillars, that queasiness within me threatened to spill out of my mouth. There was an eerie 'quiet' here compared to the madness just beyond the threshold, and as Haku and I jogged the stone steps leading to Orochimaru's den, it came as no surprise to see the two men waiting for us at the very top.

Of course. Had we expected an easy passage?

"Well, well, well, it's not every day we get to see a ghost, do we, Sakon-chan?" Ukon drawled as he tapped his leg with his _katana_. He grinned; a malicious sight made worse with the annoying turquoise lipstick he and his brother insisted on wearing.

"Ghosts are rare indeed, Ukon-chan," Sakon replied with a matching grin. It was hard to tell them apart, but having grown up with these two bastards, one way of knowing who the older was (Ukon) was the tone of his voice, which was much deeper – also he tended to part his gray hair to the left. Either way, I despised them both and there was simply no love lost between us.

I took a threatening step forward, but Haku – ever predictable – took his position before me with that familiar cold stare on his visage. Like me, he had never been a fan of the twins for they had gone out of their way to tease and humiliate him while under Orochimaru's servitude. I couldn't be sure, but I had no doubt those bastards might have had their sexual perverseness displayed before Haku quite a few times. Whatever the case, someone was going to get hurt tonight, and I had no intention of it being me or my dear companion.

"You've grown taller, Haku-chan," Sakon crooned in delight with a slow lick of his lips. "You're even more beautiful than I remember. It's going to be a shame having to carve up that pretty face of yours."

"But what about Sasuke-_chan_?" Ukon mused with a mock pout. "Look at him. He looks even more delicious than I recall. Leaner…stronger…mmm…finger-licking goooood."

I'd heard enough. I swept past Haku with my _katana_ drawn; my goal for Ukon who was still grinning at me. He swung so fast (I had forgotten how dangerous the asshole could be), but I was quick to leap out of the way; just enough to spin around with my blade; hoping it would make contact. It did, but barely. Ukon's speed was enough to rival Kimimaro's as he dodged and only suffered a loud and long rip of his uniform. He dashed for me and would have made contact, if I didn't slide out of the way (guess the ice that had formed on the ground made it a little easier for me to do this) and raise my sword at the same time. I swung and this time, Ukon's light grunt of pain was followed by me kicking at his shin to send him staggering against a pillar. On my right, I could hear Haku and Sakon going at it though a part of me was worried that he wouldn't be able to keep up with the older man. Haku had never been that good with the _katana_ let alone a pistol, and if Sakon had either weapon on him –

"DIE!" Ukon roared as he dove for me again, this time with two swords in either hand. His crazed features were blocked by his hair as I rolled away from the weapons that lodged dangerously close to where my head had been. Unfortunately, the sneaky bastard was still able to inflict some damage as I felt the blinding pain shoot up my arm. He had cut through my cloak and created a gash on my upper left arm; not enough to have me completely disabled thank goodness.

"Orochimaru-sama's been waiting for you," Ukon sneered as he licked away my blood from the tip of his sword. "He's been waiting a loooong time. He knew you were coming. Just as he knew all of this was going to happen. He's got a surprise for you too. Oh yes. A wonderful surprise. Three little traitors sent by your brother and his pathetic organization." He laughed then as I felt my blood run cold. So Orochimaru had known about Jūgo, Kiba, and Suigetsu's role all this time. He had gone along with the ruse as if unaware when he must have known all along. All of a sudden I felt incredibly sad for Itachi and his best-laid plans; that Orochimaru had always been one step ahead even 'til now.

"It's pointless," Ukon was saying as he walked toward me. "Everything is pointless. You're not going to be able to defeat him, Sasuke-_chan_. You've always been weak in the presence of Orochimaru-sama, so why should this be any different?"

For a moment – oh yes, - a brief moment, I felt a block of fear wedge itself in my heart. The doubts and all the missed opportunities over the years came flooding back as Ukon's taunts did their best to seep into my subconscious. My knees trembled and the humiliation of knowing that his words were right…that I was indeed a weakling and that all of this was of no use…threatened to have me cowering in defeat.

_(that's right…he's right…they're all right. That's why I was never able to finish the job all those years. Because deep down inside, I'm not as strong as I think I am. I can't do this…what the hell was I thinking about all this…)_

"Stand up, Sasuke!"

_(Naru…Naruto?)_

I blinked hard and stared in disbelief at the man before me. It _couldn't_ be possible. I _knew_ it wasn't possible, but I'll be damned if in that very moment Naruto wasn't standing before me in that cursed drab _yukata_ he had worn while incarcerated. If I reached out, I could touch him…hold onto him…tell and convince myself that he was here with me. However, the expression on his face gave me no opportunity to test my fantasies. His features were thunderous; a look of disgust and anger clearly aimed at what I was becoming.

"Don't just sit there feeling sorry for yourself," this hallucination said with a clench of his fist. "For fuck's sake, get up and grow a pair! You keep talking about your proud Uchiha clan and history and how strong you all were, but then you never put up! You've used that excuse for far too long and it's not gonna cut it this time!"

_(my excuses…)_

"For the past year, you've worked hard to get to this point and now you're gonna let this jackass talk you out of it? What was all that pain and anguish for, eh? Just so you can run away with your tail between your legs? GET THE FUCK UP AND FIGHT!"

_(no more excuses…)_

"You're damn right! Now go! Time's a-wasting, Sasuke."

I studied that face as if deprived and when it finally broke into that oh-so-familiar smile that seemed to radiate effortless warmth, the immediate surge of adrenaline to course through my body had me springing to my feet and just in the nick of time for Ukon had plunged his sword in my direction again. Without thinking, without wanting to question my motives or decisions, I finally let myself go. With a precision that would have had Asuma applauding with pride, I deflected the incoming blow with a raised foot and swung at his midriff with both hands clenched tightly around my sword.

I must have put all my strength into that particular strike because the sudden gush of hot blood to splatter my face and body nearly blinded me from seeing that I had almost hacked the other man in half. His comical expression of surprise at this brazen attack was completely wiped out as the sudden loud sound of a gunshot nearly had me going deaf. A perfect round hole had formed on Ukon's forehead and as I withdrew my sword, he slumped to the ground like a log. There was a second shot, and this time it was directed at my left side, where I spun around quickly to notice that it was now Sakon doing his own imitation of a fallen tree. Standing beside him with a stricken expression on his visage was my blood-streaked companion. However, the look wasn't directed at the dead man, but rather on the person now stepping out of the shadows and into our presence.

_Fuck. Not him. Not now._

"Welcome back, Haku," came the quiet greeting as Kimimaro gave a wan smile at the boy literally quivering before him. It felt strange to have to see the older man look so…'neat' in his white uniform while we looked as if we had been drenched in blood shower. Besides, my left arm was beginning to throb and I was sure it would eventually go numb with the cold weather seeping into the wound. I just hoped it would hold up for the potential fight with Orochimaru.

Kimimaro gave me a cursory glance – as if not really interested in noticing my existence.

"He's waiting for you, and I have no doubt you'll know where to find him," he finally said with a light shrug. "I will not get in your way, Sasuke. Besides…"

He turned back to Haku, that small inscrutable smile still on his visage. "Haku and I have a lot of catching up to do."

I looked at my trusted servant and friend with concern, but Haku must have had an inner pep talk with himself because he seemed to straighten up with a puff of his chest. If he was going to die, then he was going to do it with everything he's got.

"Don't worry about me, Sasuke-sama," he said with a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. "I'll be joining you shortly. I made a promise to protect you until my life was taken, and I don't intend to break that promise now."

My heart clenched tightly at his words, but all I could give was a light nod of understanding. He had his battles to face and I had mine. I would have to trust that he could hold his own against Kimimaro and make it back to me in one piece.

_(stay safe, my friend. I beg of you)_

With that quick prayer, I spun on my heels and dashed into the warm confines of Orochimaru's lair, knowing now that all my doubts and fears would have been set aside for the meantime.

_(this is it)_

There was simply no turning back now.

* * *

><p><em>Haku:<em>

He watched Sasuke get engulfed by the darkness, and he swallowed tightly; telling himself that there was nothing to fear. If there was one thing about his master, it was Sasuke's uncanny ability to think logically during a fight and that had been displayed already with his defeat of Ukon – at least before Kimimaro showed up to finish the deal.

Speaking of which, he forced himself to look back to the man still watching him in pensive silence, and as his fingers tightened around the handle of the poisoned _jutte_ hidden within his cloak, Haku prayed he had enough to outlast this fight and beyond (just in case Sasuke-sama needed any help).

_All I have to do is whip it out and throw it,_ he thought as he took a wary step back. _Just…throw it and hope it doesn't miss._

'Hope' being the key word here for if his fight with Sakon had been any indication, Haku knew he was likely to escape by a hair. His body ached and throbbed from all the blows the twin had inflicted on him despite his attempts to dodge the incoming attacks. Sure some of the knives he had thrown had found several targets, but Sakon had seemed to bounce back – as if the poison had no effect on him whatsoever. Only now, as he lay dead in the snow, did Haku begin to notice the parts of his body being eaten away by the acidic venom.

He took another tentative step back, wondering why Kimimaro was making no overt move yet. It was disconcerting and Haku could feel his features flush as he wondered if his once loving mentor was simply mocking him. He knew it wasn't wise to let anger take its course in such a fight, but damn it! A part of him still wanted to be acknowledged and respected by the older man; to show that he had done a little bit of growing up after all this time apart.

It was with that desperate thought that he lunged for Kimimaro, and in hindsight he probably should have known better.

The blinding pain would come first before Haku found himself crashing into a wall before slumping to the ground. His abdomen felt like it was on fire, and he struggled to breathe while attempting to get back to his feet unsteadily. He could hear Kimimaro's heavy but sure footsteps approaching and panic, like a douse of ice, washed over him.

_If I don't move…if I can't get myself to move…_

He spun and flung two knives in Kimimaro's direction, grimacing as the older man dodged them with almost feline grace. To Haku's dismay, Kimimaro seemed to vanish for a brief moment – only to suddenly appear right behind the younger man with a strong arm wrapped around his neck to hold him prisoner.

_(oh no!)_

Haku gasped as the pressure increased; his circulation being cut off as his lungs burned for the need for air. His vision swam and he struggled fruitlessly to be released from the death grip, but Kimimaro wasn't letting up.

"It will go much easier if you stopped trying to fight," came the husky words breathed into his ear. "You have no idea how much it hurts me to have to do this, Haku."

He felt something cold, hard and quite sharp pierce though his lower back, and considering he was not completely at a 100% healed from the injuries caused by Sai, Haku was powerless to stop the final buckling of his knees as his body sagged in defeat. At least the pressure around his neck was loosening and he could finally grab in some precious air. Unfortunately, he could feel the warmth of his blood beginning to pool around his waist and he wondered just how deep the knife had gone into him…or worse if Kimimaro had used his own poisoned _jutte_ on him.

"I am dying," Kimimaro suddenly confessed in a voice that sounded strained, but which still managed to send a jolt of shock through Haku's body. "Do you know that, my dear one?"

Kimimaro was still not releasing him. He had withdrawn the knife – thankfully - and Haku could vaguely hear it clatter to the ground. He winced as the older man's arm wrapped around his waist from behind; the other still wrapped loosely around Haku's neck. Anyone looking one would assume they were in an intimate embrace…except for the darkening pool forming beneath Haku's feet.

"I have a rare disease," Kimimaro continued as if it were perfectly natural to be having this kind of conversation. "And though it's been dormant since my childhood, the symptoms have gotten worse over the past few years…well this last year especially."

Haku could sense the bitter smile on the older man's face as Kimimaro buried his lips against his hair. There was a tender kiss placed and despite it all, Haku felt his eyes burning with unshed tears. He captured his lower lip between his teeth to control himself.

"I guess you realize how bad it is when you begin to cough up blood or find it in your urine. Orochimaru must have known, why else would he continue to give me concoction after concoction to drink…with no success? I'd like to believe he was trying his best to cure me, but at the same time, I knew I was simply being observed. Perhaps he wanted to know just how long I'd hold out before completely giving in to Death's Call."

His voice thickened and he hugged Haku to him a little tighter.

"Happy memories are few and far between and for the past few months, I've done my best to latch on to them. You are a part of those happier times, Haku. Knowing I had found someone to care for, someone who could look up to me as a big brother…aaaah…how happy it made me."

The tears broke free and rolled down Haku's cheeks silently.

"I would have done anything and everything for you," Kimimaro whispered. "But I became a coward in the end; unable to protect you when you needed me the most. And for that, I apologize…though my words may seem meaningless now. Watching you with Sasuke was hurtful, but I could see how much of a difference you were making in his life and vice versa. The smiles that had stopped when Orochimaru took you away from me were back again. I saw what you could have become if I had been strong enough to fight for you, and I resigned myself to knowing that you'd eventually find happiness even if it wasn't in my company."

The snow flurries that had stopped for a while began again in earnest as if to embellish Kimimaro's tale. In the distance, they could still hear the chaos taking place around the grounds as if Hell had been unleashed but kept away by an invisible barrier.

"I thought I would never get to see you again, Haku…and I was sure it was only God's way of punishing me for my many sins, but he deemed it fit to send someone from the past to give me another inkling of what true happiness could be."

This time Kimimaro's voice hitched and Haku was sure the older man was sobbing. This was compounded with the gentle squeeze around his waist, though it only did more to remind Haku of the pain in his lower back.

"God sent that beautiful soul back to me and through him gave me so many chances to make the right decision and each time…each time, I refused. Each time, I was too weak and afraid to take that final step…to seek the freedom I could have deserved. He knew…Orochimaru _knew_ and laughed at me…and now, he's made me do something I can never forgive myself for. What other reason do I have to live for now?"

Haku, who had closed his eyes, lifted his lashes slowly. Kimimaro – now wallowing in his self-pity – had slackened his grip and Haku knew this was the opportunity he was looking for. He had to be careful; to move in a way so as not to alert the older man to what he was doing. Trembling fingers sought for the pocket within the front of his _hakama_. They found the tip of the blade and he pricked his finger, but that was the least of his worries. After all Sasori-sama had made him drink an entire bottle of the antidote, so he was immune to the venom.

"I'm so sorry," were the muffled words that kept being repeated over and over again like a mantra. "I'm so so sorry."

Haku sniffled and felt his heart break all over again, but there was no doubt of what he had to do. He might eventually die from blood loss, but at least he would make sure Kimimaro-sama never had to suffer on this Earth any longer. It was the least he could do to repay the favor.

"I forgive you, Kimimaro-sama," he finally whispered. "I forgive you…"

He buried the knife within the meaty portion of Kimimaro's forearm and slashed through muscle and bone, and even before the knife was withdrawn, Haku could hear the dull hiss of eroding flesh.

With a sharp intake of breath, Kimimaro finally released his prisoner barely acknowledging Haku slumping to the ground at the sudden motion. He watched the spread of the poison within him; fascinated as his veins seemed to take on a shade of dark purple…the arteries beginning to swell…while the poison sped toward his already decaying heart. There was pain, but that was pale in comparison to the effect it was having within his chest. It was as if someone was scrubbing hard at the organ with the most abrasive of sandpapers; a discomfort so great it was impossible to put into words.

He began to cough…and cough…and cough…and though he was quick to slap a hand over his mouth, it wasn't enough to control the spurt of blood to escape anyway. Thick and mixed with mucus, it ran down his fingers and hand like a grotesque paint job, and even at that…he still couldn't stop coughing.

Haku couldn't watch. He turned his gaze away and wept in silence, unable to hitch in his breath easily thanks to his lower back muscles protesting with every motion.

When Kimimaro finally fell to the ground, Haku flinched as if stung; afraid that Kimimaro would find some strength from somewhere to attack him again. He eventually dared to look, while desperately seeking for the _jutte_ he had struck the older man with. However, it appeared that Kimimaro had no intention of moving for Sasori's poison had just about eaten away the left side of the once perfect physique. Even his bones weren't spared, and the sickening stench of burning flesh was nauseating enough to make Haku want to vomit.

And yet, despite knowing he had mere seconds to live, the one good eye - that once brilliant, beautiful sea-green eye – shimmered with unshed tears and a grateful smile within it.

_Thank you,_ it seemed to say as it slowly began to erode away. _Thank you, Haku._

(it's all over…)

He raised his knees to his chest; ignoring the agony this inflicted on his weary and weakened body. He knew he could take his cloak and cover up the remains - what pitiful remains there were that is - of the man he once admired, but what was the point? It was almost fitting that the falling snow should be the final blanket over him; a reminder of his one good deed so many years ago.

_We found each other in the snow, Kimimaro-sama,_ Haku thought with a wistful smile as his lashes grew heavier. _It's only right that we should end this way after all…_

And as he finally caved in to his body's need for 'rest', Haku wished with all his might that he could have at least kept the promise made to Sasuke-sama –

(and Naruto-kun)

…for as much as he would have loved to crawl on his hands and knees to help his master, he was simply too tired to fight anymore.

His battle was complete.

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke:<em>

What struck me was how dimly lit familiar hallways now appeared to be. Many of the fancy oil lamps had been snuffed out, and the long shadows my running figure caused gave the heart-stopping illusions that I was being followed. However, besides my harsh breath and footsteps, I met no obstacles in the form of a Watchdog (hardly surprising considering the number of dead officers I kept passing on the way) or any possible traps set by Orochimaru to stall me.

_(he's waiting for you)_

I could sense and feel his very presence looming like an unseen ghost as I made my way deeper into his sanctuary. My leg was beginning to bother me, reminding me of Itachi's fear about the cold weather seeping into my bones and how it would affect my movement. I didn't want to focus too much on limping or showing Orochimaru my weakness in that department, so I'd have to fake it as much as possible.

As I approached the large ornate doors leading to his reception room/office, I took a deep breath to compose myself. For an entire year, I had dreamed of this moment – no…not an entire year…for over fifteen-years I had waited for this opportunity, and though that tiny voice inside my head (and heart) screamed for me to back off and give up, just recalling the hallucination of Naruto yelling at me, brought a reluctant smirk on my lips as I finally pushed the doors open –

_(what the…?!)_

…and was heralded with a sight that would have made weaker men crumble.

At first I wasn't sure of exactly what I was seeing, but as mind and sight eventually began to process the situation, I realized I was actually looking at three bodies hanging from the ceiling. Bodies which looked like hanging pieces of flesh (or maybe it was the ragged pieces of their clothing) for they had been thoroughly beaten and whipped to an inch of their life. You could hardly recognize the swollen and disfigured faces and the dull _drip drip drip_ of their blood pooling at their feet - literally flooding the wooden floor - made me step out of the way lest I slip and fall in it.

"Good God," I breathed as I walked closer. "What the hell…?"

"He's…here…at last," came the low croak, which had me nearly jumping out of my skin. They were still alive! At least the one in the middle with hair that must have been silver though now streaked with so much dried blood, it looked like mud.

"Sas…Sasuke…Uchiha…eh?" this person continued as he swung gently back and forth. Their hands were bound above their heads, and I watched as this stubborn person tried to loosen the grip of the thick ropes, but to no avail. If anything, he seemed to be chafing more of his skin with every attempt to release himself.

"Who are you?" I asked warily. Goosebumps were breaking out on my skin. In fact, my skin felt like it was literally crawling and not so much at the three men before me, but at the realization that we were no longer alone. Orochimaru was here. I could literally _smell_ him.

I felt like throwing up.

"Ita…Itachi-sama…" the biggest of the three spoke through lips that were twice its size. He had taken the worst of the beatings and it was a damn miracle he was even still alive. You could hardly see his eyes – they were swollen shut – and when he spoke, his voice came as a low rasp; completely painful to listen to. I wanted him to shut up and save his energy, but at the mention of my brother's name, I realized who these three were.

Suigetsu, Kiba, and Jūgo. The three men sent in to infiltrate Orochimaru's new army. The three men Ukon had bragged about capturing earlier. These men had sacrificed a lot to be here, and now they were about to pay the ultimate price. It was clear that Orochimaru had not killed them completely because the sick bastard _wanted_ me to see this. He was already beginning his fight, but on the psychological plane apparently. Perhaps he assumed that seeing these men would weaken my resolve –

_(not anymore, you son-of-a-bitch)_

"Don't move," I commanded as I held out my _katana_. "I'll try to get this cut as quickly as possible."

"Do…don't…it's…trap…" came the breathless but late warning from the third because I was already hacking away at the ropes with one swing. As he fell to the floor with a painful thump, a sudden 'rain' of sharpened _kunai_ descended from the ceiling. The man I cut down would have just enough time to roll to the side, though one of the weapons lodged itself into his arm. As for me, I suffered a few grazes especially on my cheeks and torso, but otherwise was fine.

"As soon as I cut you two," I commanded to the others. "You do like your friend and roll out of the way, got it?"

I didn't wait for their answers as I swung again. The biggest guy couldn't move fast enough unfortunately and got two _kunai_ buried within him – though I was glad to see that they hadn't hit any vital points. Still, if he didn't get any medical attention soon, there was no hope for him. He was practically the walking dead.

In the burst of my adrenaline rush – between rescuing and dodging more raining weapons – it took me another extra moment to realize two had pierced through my upper arm (the same one Ukon had wounded earlier) and my left thigh. I pulled both weapons out and flung them away, grateful they weren't deep enough to create any problems.

"Get out of here!" I yelled to the battered trio. "And get him a damn doctor or somebody to take care of him!"

I doubted they'd be able to find any sort of help in the chaos outside, but it was damn better than hanging around here. Not waiting to see their expressions, I dashed into Orochimaru's office proper, now furious at how cheap his tactics were. To think he'd use such basic tricks and traps was beneath my level, and he knew just how much it would irritate me.

"Where are you?!" I roared as I threw open the doors and was met with that damned eerie silence. His office still looked as impeccable as ever, the only tell-tale sign of anyone having been in there was the presence of a still burning ornate pipe I was all too familiar with.

"Stop hiding and show your face, you coward," I growled.

I froze as my periphery vision caught a movement, and I spun on my heels to face it. However, I was confronted with only the billowing silk curtains from the gentle gust of the winter breeze outside. By this time, I was aware of how much my heart was beginning to pound; so loud it was a near deafening sound within my ears and head. My palms were getting slick with sweat despite the death grip they had around the handle of my _katana_. I had long taken off my cloak on the way here, so I was able to move much better without the restrictive clothing, but I was still sweating like a stuck pig.

Beads of sweat dripped from my hair and threatened to enter my eyes, and just as I shook my head a little to get rid of them, I saw the shadowed movement again.

(slithering…like a fucking snake!)

I spun around again, but there was nothing there.

_Fuck!_

He was doing this on purpose!

"Stop being such a scaredy-cat," I taunted coldly, as my lips curled in a sneer. "Come out and face me like a man, Orochimaru."

"A man he says," came the breathless response that seemed to come from everywhere and nowhere at once. "And what a gorgeous man he has become indeed."

I shuddered at the sickening compliment and braced myself for another surprise attack. His low chuckle seemed to echo within my pounding head until I was sure it threatened to consume me. The urge to drop my _katana_ and cover my ears was overwhelming, and I had to literally close my eyes, take a deep breath and try to compose my –

"Still so beautiful and ever so quick to anger, my dearest one."

"AH!"

I couldn't help the scream of shock yet terror that coursed through me as he had whispered those words into my ear coupled with the abrasive wetness of that damned tongue licking my skin. I stumbled backwards in my haste and bumped into the low coffee table, my heart a jackhammer within my chest as my eyes – probably as wide as saucers – took in the sight of my nightmares.

_(What…what the hell is this?!)_

God help me, but I had no idea who this _creature_ was before me.

Orochimaru had always been lanky and slender in build, but the person before me was nothing more than skin and bones draped in a black velvet robe that looked way heavier than his combined body weight. His flesh was thin and alabaster, so thin you could see the greenish hue of his veins throbbing with life. His face was the worst of all; with those eyes so sunken in, it felt like you were looking at a talking skull. His lips were parted in what I assumed was supposed to be a smile, but it came across as something ghastly and disdainful. They peeled back to reveal sharper canines, and there was no mistaking that despite his starved appearance, the intelligence in those eyes were still as strong as ever.

"Welcome home, Sasuke," he greeted me with outstretched arms that seemed to elongate before my suddenly blurring vision.

_(what the…what's happening…!)_

"I have waited for this reunion for so very long."

_(what's happening to my eyes…?!)_

"Now come a little closer, my love…"

_(I can't…I can't see…!)_

I fell to my knees; the _katana_ slipping from boneless fingers as I raised my hands to my face. My eyes felt like there were on fire and the conditioned response to this was to naturally seek the medication Orochimaru specifically prepared for me.

_(no more…you are no longer under his influence when it comes to that, remember?)_

However, I did not understand why this was happening now. Hadn't Shisui and my brother assured me that this would never occur again, so why…?

"AAAAAAAAARGGGHHHH!"

It was a guttural sound of agony that sent chills down my spine. Who was that? Was that really my voice? Was I the one screaming as if I was being murdered? But God…oh God…the _pain_…it was too much to bear. I couldn't take it anymore! I wanted to gorge my eyes out because…because…!

"You belong to me, Sasuke," came the husky croon of Death that slowly seeped into my subconscious. "You've always and will always belong to me."

_Welcome home…_


	42. 42: The Darkness Within

**Notes:** Whew…well this was a doozy chapter to write. Stayed up to three in the morning – two nights in a row! – because it was giving me nightmares *lol* I had originally planned to make this a twofer (meaning we get to see Sasuke and Naruto finally deal with their respective 'enemies'), but this one just took on a life of its own. So hopefully all those who were 'confused' about the last chapter will have a few things clarified here.

Oh! Another thing to mention is that this isn't happening in real time. Meaning that whatever's taking place now in Byaku-Shinkyou isn't necessarily coinciding with Naruto's situation in Tokyo. Either way, Naruto get his chance to shine in the next chapter. I think he's currently thinking of ways to kill me for abandoning him for so long.

Thanks again for all the great feedback! It's not easy to write battle/fight scenes because the action moves fast and furious in your head and you try to get that onto 'paper' for you readers to 'see' exactly what I do. So if it works…I'm a happy panda.

Enjoy as always and see you next (hopefully not so long) time! :D

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 42:<strong>

**The Darkness Within**

_If I see that bridge  
>That is spanned by flights of magpies<br>Across the arc of heaven  
>Made white with a deep-laid frost,<br>Then the night is almost past._

_**Otomo no Yakamochi**_

* * *

><p><em>Orochimaru:<em>

_Many Moons Ago:_

_Tokyo Prefecture**:**_

_"A medal of honor (jugun kisho) is hereby given, on March 30, 19xx, to Orochimaru Sannin, Lieutenant of the Japanese Navy, on application by the Naval Minister of Japan and with the Emperor's approval, pursuant to the Regulation Relating to the Medals Honoring Participation in Battles (19xx-xx). Dated April 1, 19xx."_

His lips curved downward as if reading something in distaste, and perhaps it was considering the circumstances around the pitiful piece of fancy paper in his hand. The event had been a big brouhaha with all the bells and whistles that accompanied such grandiose displays of affection for war 'veterans'. He could still see the shiny, flushed faces around him; faces filled with a greedy hunger – almost nauseating in its intensity - as they all tried to get a piece of the decorated 'war hero'.

_(war hero my ass)_

A million cameras flashed, while a thousand voices rose in claustrophobic unison. "Tell us more about the war! What happened? I heard you almost died? How many men did you rescue? Was it true you were captured? Were you tortured? Did you take out over a hundred enemies? Tell us more! Tell us more! Tell us more!"

_(as if you're really interested in the truth. You'll never know the depths of darkness within the human heart, and thank whatever Deity you worship that you won't have the pleasure of ever knowing. Bask in the sugar-coated stories the media feeds you and remain oblivious…for your sanity's sake)_

Politely, he declined being in the spotlight. He played the role of bashful hero to a tee, giving them the illusion that he would rather be anywhere but before the 'adoring' masses all clamoring for his attention. He had only done it for the love of his country. He needed no extra recognition for something that ought to come naturally to any able-bodied Japanese man. He would leave it up to Shimura Danzo - a fellow war comrade - to feed the rabid media with tales of his bravado. After all, Danzo was not afraid of the attention and lapped it up as much as he could.

_(the government's lapdog…that's all he is)_

In all honesty, Orochimaru hadn't cared much about the war and had signed up purely for selfish reasons. To the enlightened (and goodness knows there had been many protesters who claimed to be so), the war was stupid and senseless. Why send so many young men out to no-man's land to get slaughtered all because of your need to show your military might? War was nothing more than a bunch of high-ranking government officials sitting around a table going "Oh? So you think your dick is bigger than mine? Hold on, let me pull my pants down and I'll show you just how much bigger _my_ dick is." In the end, he who had the biggest dick and bragging rights would force the others to give him a massive blow job. Forget the number of casualties this perverted game of theirs had left on blood-soaked battlefields.

_(so why join in the bloodbath?)_

He sneered and looked out the window of the car, where the uninspiring view of stark winter trees and melting snow slowly began to morph into memories he was sometimes loathe to remember.

He had been a child of war - their entire generation in fact – and his earliest memory of his father was seeing him in uniform and waving goodbye for the last time. How old had he been then? Six? Five? Even younger? He couldn't remember. What he did know – and still had nightmares about – were the incessant and deafening sounds of explosions going off randomly all day and all night. One never knew when a bomb would be dropped on their heads. It was a miserable childhood spent living in underground bunkers where the concept of sunlight was close to impossible. For those foolish enough to make the mistake of leaving their safe havens to get some breath of 'fresh air' (ironic considering how polluted the outside world was at this time) – it was safe to say they were never seen from or heard again.

His mother – who by this time had slowly begun her descent into madness – would spend hours at a time crouched in a corner of the bunker they shared with three other filthy families. She muttered to herself, sometimes breaking out into senseless screams that terrified the other occupants let alone her only son who was at his wits end as to what to do with her. Personal hygiene became an afterthought. She chewed her nails to the quick until it bled. She refused to brush her teeth or hair, and would hardly touch a meal prepared for her by the kind officers who stopped by once a day to deliver food to the families.

Orochimaru would tell himself – as the years went by – that there was really nothing else he could have done for her. He was only a child. How could he be expected to look after himself when she simply refused to acknowledge his existence? When other children would crawl into the arms of their families at the end of a long day, his mother continued to remain in her selfish state of insanity. So much so that she would slap him away and scream in terror should he dare make an attempt to call or touch her. There had been this look in her eyes; not just from the madness, but a deep-rooted hate that struck him at the core. The rejection had hurt at first, but eventually he learned to develop a thick skin to it. He began to distance himself from her, no longer caring if she lived or died. He would tell himself it was what she deserved for being such a god-awful mother. And it was this loathing for a woman - who ought to have loved him – that carried on to the other mothers (and women) he came in contact with.

Bitterly, he would watch them fawn and lavish attention on their offspring, and perhaps it was the way he looked – of how pale his skin was and how much staying underground had made him literally look ghostly – that even they too began to shun his company. Once pitying looks became malicious and wary. His fellow mates were encouraged not to speak to him for fear that his mother's madness would be contagious. And so he kept to himself, choosing not to interact with others until they were free to get back to the outside world. He found himself seeking entertainment in any other form, like watching an ant colony form in a corner of the wall – admiring their natural industry for a while - before becoming bored with the whole thing. He found that he took a rather sadistic pleasure in crushing each ant with a piece of stick, not simply content to press them into the ground, but to chop them up into bits while they still writhed and begged silently for life. Sometimes he imagined it was his mother (or any of the other women around him) in that position, and the almost serene smile that would come to his features then only made him look more sinister to the occupants forced to live with him.

Hours turned into days, days into weeks, and weeks into long and endless months. When his mother died, he didn't even know. He had assumed she was asleep – as usual – and it wasn't until he noticed the once scrawny figure begin to get a little bloated, and the ashen skin becoming a sick shade of gray…

_(and the smell…oh the smell)_

…did he finally realize something was terribly wrong.

He couldn't remember crying, though the other wives and children in the bunker had done enough screaming and wailing for him. He had wanted to scream at them to shut up; to tell them how horrible they were for acting as if they cared when they had simply left her to die. He watched as the soldiers – with cloths over their noses and mouths – hoisted the decaying body onto a large garbage bag, where she was probably thrown into a trash can in the outside world or burned in the incinerator. Orochimaru hoped it was the latter. He would hate to think that his mother was an extra pollutant to an already stinking world out there.

With no more attachments to this particular bunker – and aware that the families he had lived with the past few months would want nothing to do with him anyway – he made the decision to find his way out of there. He would take his chances outside, and if he didn't, then he would welcome Death if it came knocking. However, he would come to realize that the underground shelter was nothing more than an entire 'city' beneath the ground. There were hundreds of other families sheltered here, and with so many tunnels leading to even more bunkers, it became a labyrinth of wonder to the inquisitive boy. No one seemed concerned about him or cared to ask where he came from. And why should they? There were other children, of his age, wandering around with no care in the world. With fathers either dead or soldiers fighting 'out there', there were hardly enough male authoritative figures to maintain some semblance of control.

_(bottom line, the women were too weak)_

Once or twice he got involved in fights with bigger boys who considered him a sissy because of his long black hair and slightly effeminate features. He was not a fighter and couldn't really defend himself during those scuffles; something he was terribly ashamed of but wouldn't let on. He would bear the abuse in silence until they eventually got tired and left him alone; though he would never admit to himself that a small – very small – part of him feasted on the attention no matter how negative it was. It was this side that convinced him that being kicked around was okay. It simply meant he was 'alive', that they actually 'noticed' him, and that was a million times better than being ignored.

However, on this particular day – where he had been minding his own damn business as usual – his bullies seemed determined to really finish off what they had started. The routine was almost always the same. First he was surrounded and taunted for having no shoes, for wearing such a ragged dishrag for clothing, for having dirty long hair, for having such pale skin (which they'd pinch so hard until it turned red), for having such weird-looking eyes ("Snake eyes! Snake eyes!' they'd chant over and over again), for being such a fucking pansy/pussy/faggot/wimp. He would be pushed from one person to another, while he begged for them to leave him alone, though inside –

_(kill you all one day I'll kill you all one day I'll kill you all one day I'll kill you)_

…he felt the conflicting emotions of twisted pleasure and a simmering mass of darkness that could be considered hate.

Someone ripped off his clothes and slammed him into the wall. He tried to cry out in pain, but something dirty was stuffed into his mouth and he was thrown onto his stomach. He bruised easily and was already bleeding from several places, but that's okay. The sight of blood didn't bother him too much. He could vaguely hear them screaming and laughing…something about 'fucking him up since he likes taking it in the ass probably!' He did not understand, neither was he sure why they were suddenly spreading his legs apart or why one of them was beginning to reach for his penis to fondle it roughly.

"Mmmpppffff!" he protested pitifully, though he was appalled to find that that 'side' of him actually enjoyed the tiny jolts of pleasure that raced through his tiny frame with each tug of his organ.

It was times like these that he wondered where the adults were. None of those cowards ever came to see what the children did. No one would care to rescue an orphan like him. He'd be messed around with and then discarded, only for the cycle to repeat itself the next day. He squeezed his eyes shut as he felt something hard teasing the entrance to his anus. Confusion and anger was giving way to pain, and perhaps whatever object was being thrust into him would have gone deeper (as their laughter rang louder and louder), when it was suddenly stopped as a gruff and very (male) adult voice interrupted the proceedings with shocked fury.

"Get the hell off him! What in God's name do you kids think you're doing?!"

At first Orochimaru thought the adult would be ignored, but at the sound of someone being cuffed, the other kids took the hint and bolted from the scene, but not before giving the 'intruder' a piece of their minds.

"Hey…kid," the man said in a much gentler tone as knelt beside Orochimaru. "Can you get up?"

He could, and when he did, it was to see the kind features of the one he'd come to know as Hiruzen-sensei. Now going on in years (hence his exemption from being drafted into the army), Hiruzen had been a Dean of one of the more prestigious universities in the country. Though the air raids had destroyed most of his beloved school (and home) , he had been smart enough to take with him a lot of reading and academic material which he stored in his neat and rather homely bunker.

While he tended to Orochimaru's wounds, fed, bathed, clothed and made him sleep on the first real bed he'd had in almost a year, he regaled the young boy with tales of his life above ground. He had lost his wife in one of the countless air raids and his only relatives lived miles away where they couldn't be reached. Orochimaru listened with polite attentiveness, not speaking much except to eventually query about the thick books that lined the cement walls.

"A reader, huh?" Hiruzen had replied with a smile and warmth in his heart. His first love had always been teaching after all, and he thanked the gods for sending him a new student to impart his wisdom to.

For the next five years, Orochimaru proved himself to be the perfect sponge. He soaked information in a way that amazed Hiruzen who was sure he had seen his share of geniuses in his lifetime. For such a young boy, no subject matter seemed too difficult. Mathematics, Chemistry, Physics, Biochemistry, History, Geography, Statistics, the Languages (English, French, Russian, Spanish, German and even Latin) – you name it, Orochimaru wanted a piece of it. However, both men came to realize that their true curiosities lay in the study of the human body. Biology and all its sub-topics was Hiruzen's passion, and he was thrilled to know that Orochimaru had a keen interest in that field as well. However, simply not content to study anatomy in picture books, he had suggested to Hiruzen that they begin catching some of the rats, stray cats or dogs that wandered around the tunnels.

"You said it yourself, sensei," Orochimaru would say. "Practical learning is always better than theoretical speculations."

At first Hiruzen had been wary about it, but if there was one thing he had come to know about his young protégé, it was just how convincing the young boy could be. Or maybe he was just getting too old and had come to see Orochimaru as a much-needed son to replace the one he had lost in the war. Either way, he couldn't say no to the request. It would become the beginnings of a morbid fascination with the dead.

Hiruzen never questioned where Orochimaru found his test subjects, for the young boy would return – all flushed with an excitement in his eyes that was almost worrisome – with rats, an occasional bat or two, a still living cat or puppy held by its legs. At first the creatures had genuinely looked starved and close to dying anyway, and that was okay with Hiruzen. However, when Orochimaru began returning with more robust and perfectly healthy pets – some still with their name tags on them – Hiruzen felt he ought to put his foot down.

"I think you've dissected enough animals to know just what makes them tick inside," he had argued with the pouting boy. "Why don't we work on something else, hmm?"

At first Orochimaru had conceded; willingly going along with whatever Hiruzen wanted. However, his inquisitiveness grew to a fever pitch. There was no way he could describe to the old man the thrill he received from slicing through fur, muscle and tissue; to watch the creature's life literally wither away as you watched. One time – when Hiruzen hadn't been looking – he had deliberately kept a puppy alive, watching in fascination as he sliced open the chest area to observe the tiny beating heart. He would poke and prod it over and over again, that serene smile on his features as the puppy mewled in agony each time. Finally tired of this game, he stabbed the heart as hard as it could, hardly blinking as dots of blood splattered on his face.

_(not good enough)_

He wanted more.

It was all well and good to work with animals, but what was the point? The anatomy in all those big books didn't show cats and puppies or birds. They showed _humans_ in all their wonderful complexities. He longed to see it in person…to watch the blood flow through millions of tiny arteries and veins…to see a pulsing heart and if possible hold it in his hands.

He began to find himself wandering along the tunnels, seeking people who were dead or close to dying. They had been trapped in this Hell for over five years now and the wear and tear was finally beginning to take its course. Food supplies came in sporadic bursts, and though Hiruzen's transistor radio kept feeding them lies about the war coming to an end, there had been no influx of soldiers rushing in to rescue them.

_(we might have been forgotten…forever buried underground and forgotten forever)_

…which was fine with him actually. He didn't care if they were never rescued. The tunnels had become his haven away from the impurities of the outside world.

He came to a stop before a bunker that reeked of Death. There were no lights or sounds coming from inside, and taking a quick look down the tunnel to make sure he was not being watched or followed, he quickly slipped into the small room before anyone else could notice. He flicked the switch on and off, but it was clear that the naked light bulb was no longer functioning. The stench was much stronger now and there was no doubt of what it represented.

_(mother)_

Removing the leather bag he always carried with him (mostly to put in any dead animal he caught, but also with some hunting supplies), he dug into it to whip out a flashlight – but not before covering his nose and mouth with a cloth. The light revealed what he had already guessed. There were two dead bodies – a mother and a baby; emaciated and already welcoming maggots to the unhealed scabs and wounds on their decaying flesh.

"Perfect," he muttered with pleasure as he crept closer to the silent figures, while slipping on a pair of thick gloves. "I think I'll start with you first."

He reached for the baby…and the rest as they say is history.

Hiruzen would never know of his student's macabre new hobby, and when the war finally ended – after eight terrible long years - Orochimaru would leave his mentor with nothing more than a simple note placed on the old man's desk:

"_I have learned all I can from you, Sensei._

_Now I have a much bigger canvas to work with._

_Thank you for everything._

_Sincerely,_

_O."_

* * *

><p>He flicked on the lighter and held the tip of the certificate to the glowing flame, watching dispassionately as the fancy paper began to lick it up hungrily. In no time at all, the elegant calligraphy melted into ashes, some of which began to fall on his lap and onto the car seat. He leaned closer to the window to let the rest of the burning certificate slip out of his fingers, where it soon got lost in the whip of the cold night air.<p>

He smiled as he recalled the headlines his underground escapades had created in the news several weeks later. The nation was 'simply horrified' to find so many decapitated, dissected or violated bodies of so many women and babies.

"I have never seen anything so disgusting in my life," some councilwoman had shrieked in horror. "Whoever did this must be punished! This is the cost of war, ladies and gentlemen! It makes mad men and women and it must be stopped!"

_It's all for science,_ a part of him would argue. _Nothing more…nothing less._

_(or was it?)_

He glanced down at the gleaming bronze medal on his chest as if seeing a foreign object. He had gotten quite a few of these –

_(for valor extraordinaire)_

…and could almost laugh at the hypocrisy of it all. Why had he joined the war? It wasn't for his bravery or his supposed 'valor'. He couldn't care less who he was fighting for or against, all that mattered to him was the quest for knowledge; the willingness to join the medic team, where he could get a firsthand look at the casualties of war. He doubted his precious country would look him in the face the moment his experiments got out in the open, but then again, he had always made sure he left no trail behind.

_(but it wasn't all for selfish reasons. I genuinely wanted…__**want**__ to find cures to certain diseases, and if it means using a few (hundred…thousand) guinea pigs every now and then…what's the harm? At the end of the day, you get praised for being a genius in eliminating cancer! No one bothers to find out the long and tedious process to achieve the final result, do they?)_

"No, they don't," he said to himself with a cruel smile. "They never do."

* * *

><p>"You're late," came the low grumble as he walked into the gloomy establishment and sat across the sullen man before him. Why Fugaku had chosen for them to meet in this disgusting pigsty of a restaurant was mind-boggling, but then again, who knew what went on behind the mind of an Uchiha man? The entire clan was both an enigma and a righteous pain-in-the-ass.<p>

"My apologies," Orochimaru replied with a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. "It's been a long day." He flicked the medal on his chest. "My present for being such a good boy during the war."

Fugaku rolled his eyes and finished off the rest of the beer he had ordered while waiting. As he raised his hand for the waiter to come over, Orochimaru studied the younger man in silence. Fugaku had been a latecomer to the war; an influx of new recruits sent in to relieve the ailing army in the final stages of a losing battle. He had been sent to Orochimaru's division and consequently sustained a life-threatening injury , which would force Fugaku to return to Japan almost as soon as he had arrived. It was something shameful – at least Fugaku had thought so – as he lamented to Orochimaru while under the influence of several milligrams of morphine. The Uchiha had a proud history of protecting the country and it was a dark blemish on his record if he couldn't return as a decorated soldier. The current patriarch – Uchiha Madara – had been a war hero in his own right; a man who was feared, respected and now considered a legend. It was safe to say that no other man in the clan could live up to his high standards, and Fugaku had felt the weight of history upon his shoulders.

Orochimaru – for his part – had listened and soaked up the sick man's rants and raves. He had heard of the Uchiha clan over the years, but never really paid that much attention to them until what he witnessed while Fugaku was under the throes of extreme stress. At first Orochimaru was sure he must have been hallucinating, but he'd be damned if he hadn't noticed the dramatic change in Fugaku's pupils at certain periods during the day.

"Oh that…" Fugaku had muttered when Orochimaru asked. "It's just a stupid thing we have as a clan. Well…not everyone can get it. I guess you have to be really special to be able to activate it."

"Activate what?"

"The ability to see beyond human capabilities. I think it's one of the reasons I fucked up out there. The intense aura of all the enemies confused me and I…I just lost it. I was careless."

He would proceed to ramble on about intense emotions and wishing he never had the 'damn cursed eye', but Orochimaru's curiosity had been piqued. So much so that at some point, he had even contemplated killing Fugaku (by overdosing him on medication) and then plucking out his eyes to experiment on. Fortunately for the younger man, his superiors had decided it was time for him to go home, hence stalling Orochimaru's sinister plans in its tracks.

Unfortunately, that little hindrance didn't stop him.

He made a conscious effort to seek out any other registered Uchiha in his division and was dismayed to find that the few who had signed up were dead and buried, or did not have Fugaku's ability.

_(frustrating!)_

He _had_ to gain more access to these precious men (or women) and what better way than to befriend the young soldier whose life he had saved while on the battlefield? It was the reason why he had set up this reunion, though Fugaku had chosen the meeting place. Orochimaru's goal was not to appear too eager. He would take his precious time and eventually he'll get what he wanted.

"I plan to leave for a while," he said aloud after his beer was placed before him. He took a sip and made a face; not liking the lingering aftertaste on his tongue.

"Leave where?" Fugaku queried with a raised brow.

Orochimaru studied the stern albeit handsome features, idly wondering if making an overt move to seduce the younger man would work. He doubted it. His 'experimentations' over the years hadn't just been reserved for the dissecting of human flesh, enjoying the pleasures they gave had come into the bargain as well. From the moment he had given his body to one of the many random men he had shacked up with before joining the military, Orochimaru had seen no reason to stop pursuing such physical gratifications. He could write a book on all the sexual escapades he had been a part of over the years; from the most bizarre fetishes to ritualistic sex orgies, you name it, he had partaken of it. To him, sex was nothing more than a journey of exploration and self-indulgence. If done the right way…it could be a positively religious experience. If there was a plane higher than Nirvana, then some sexual acts would fit in that category.

But he digressed –

"Around the world," he replied with a wry smile. "I am too restless a soul to remain in one place. You should know that."

Fugaku shrugged lightly. "Do what you have to do. Don't let me stop you."

However, at the barely audible sigh that escaped the younger man's lips, Orochimaru leaned forward with an expression of concern on his features. "What's wrong? You don't look particularly happy. Are you jealous of my medal? I can give it to you if you want. It's useless to me."

The venomous look he received brought a low chuckle from him.

"If you must know," Fugaku retorted. "I have a lot on my mind, all right?"

"What's the matter?"

Fugaku sighed again and rubbed a hand across his forehead. "There was a meeting of the Uchiha leaders…and apparently they are thinking of making me the next head of Byaku-Shinkyou."

"Hmm."

Although he buried his words with the lift of the cup to his lips, Orochimaru's heart rate had quickened at this news.

_Byaku-Shinkyou._

The revered homestead of the elite Uchiha clan; a place as legendary as the man who had created it. Orochimaru had only seen pictures of it (and of course the stories). He could only imagine the _power_ within those walls, and if there were other members of the clan with Fugaku's abilities just ripe for the plucking…

"…don't know if I'm ready for that kind of a role," Fugaku was mumbling to himself. "I mean, I think it's a great honor, but I'm still just thirty…well almost thirty! It's like running a small country!"

"You should have advisors and the such to help you, don't you?"

Fugaku rolled his eyes. "They might as well be a bunch of brown nosers for all the help I'll get." He paused and then looked up with a smirk on his features. "Heeey. What if I make you my second-in-command? You're a…" He sneered at the medal. "…war hero, aren't you? You should know one or two things about running an organization like this, right?"

Orochimaru couldn't help laughing at the notion, though his heart still drummed loudly. "A tempting invitation, but one I'll have to politely decline. Besides…I still have that journey of mine to think about."

Fugaku suddenly looked pensive. He rubbed his chin and then leaned forward with his voice lowered in a conspirational whisper. "Do you…do you remember that thing I told you about the eyes?" He pointed to his and blinked for good measure. Tonight they looked normal, but Orochimaru nodded all the same.

"I was sure you wouldn't remember," he said with a small smile. "You were high on morphine at the time."

"I remember," Fugaku replied with a shrug. "Not all of it, but I do remember we talked about it. However…" He paused again and took a deep breath. "I didn't tell you _everything_ about it. Remember when I said it was a damn curse?"

"Yes."

"For those of us who have been 'lucky' to get this ability…as we grow older…it gets worse."

Orochimaru frowned. "How do you mean?"

"I mean if it's overused, you eventually go blind," came the blunt statement that had the older man stumped for a moment. Fugaku gave a bitter smile. "The price to pay for having such a powerful ability. It's why the Uchiha were given the authority to become the 'police' for Japan centuries ago. They recognized our knack for seeing the hearts of men, and we were exploited for all we were worth. In the end, many of our ancestors – and even 'til today – although they don't talk about it much – end up going blind. Many choose to have their eyes removed and stored away until some kind of cure is found to either slow the process or stop it altogether. So far no one has been able to do so. The closest has been the serum applied at birth that helps 'cool' the eyes should they get too heated from overuse. Does that make sense?"

Orochimaru nodded; though his mind was already whirling with endless possibilities.

"I swear," Fugaku was muttering. "I'll do anything to find a cure for this. I want to break that damn cycle. I want to see my children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren (if possible) without having to rely on my hands to know what their damn facial features look like. There's nothing worse than watching your father no longer able to recognize you again. It's worse than death."

The sudden flash of his mother's horrified expression had Orochimaru gritting his teeth. He swallowed his bitterness with another gulp of beer, before reaching out to cover Fugaku's hand with his.

"What if I told you that I could find a cure?"

Fugaku looked up with an expression that was a mixture of hope, confusion and disbelief. He eventually frowned and withdrew his hand from the cold touch. "What are you talking about?" he asked carefully.

Orochimaru smiled. "While on my journey, I'm going to do all I can to find a cure for your cursed clan's…ailment."

"Why? What's in it for you?"

Orochimaru threw his hands up as if surrendering. "Nothing but the pleasure of knowing I'll be helping a good friend. I do want you to be able to see your children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren with those beautiful eyes of yours."

Fugaku made a face at the compliment, but anyone could see that the hope was back in his eyes. "And how long is this trip of yours going to be?"

"Who knows?" Orochimaru replied. "Could be months, years -"

"The longer you are gone, the more blind people we'll have!"

"Then I'll return in earnest, my dear friend. I promise. I will return with an elixir to make you love me for the rest of your life."

* * *

><p><em>Present Day<em>

_Byaku-Shinkyou_

"Forgive me for such a rough welcome, my dearest one, but I had to remind you of just how much you need me. You see, I'm able to recreate the negative effects of an evil aura – via the smoke from the pipe you must have noticed earlier – hence your eyes reverting to its original state. Though I must applaud Uchiha Shisui for being able to come up with a counter serum to dilute the effects; not as potent as mine, but close enough. Now hold steady, my love. This might sting a little, but I promise you'll feel so much better. "

Sasuke didn't want to, but he knew that for his sanity's sake, he'd have to rely on whatever the hell Orochimaru was about to apply. He felt the cold fingers tip his chin lightly, caress his skin before trailing up to his right eye to pry it open gently. It took all his strength not to scream out in pain – for just that little act alone was enough to make him want to die all over again. However, at the _one, two, three_ drops of something wet and cool in his lacrimal caruncle, the immediate effect was ten times better than Shisui's treatment. Hell, even _better_ than the previous medication Orochimaru used to give him. That one used to take at least a two or three minutes to get his eyesight back to normal, but this…_this_ was like…_magic_!

"Amazing, isn't it?" Orochimaru crooned after he had applied in both eyes and now stood back to watch the young man blink and stare around him in amazement. "My proudest achievement yet. It's just a damn shame your father gave up on me before I could finish it."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Sasuke asked with a frown. He had to remember what he was here for, but at the same time, he was curious to know just why this man had felt the need to eliminate his entire family (and most of his clan for that matter).

Orochimaru sighed heavily and placed the small glass vial on the desk as if tempting Sasuke to reach for it. He tapped his walking stick on the floor as he paced toward the window.

"For ten years," he began quietly. "Ten years I wandered the earth searching for the cure your father had requested of me. It was during that time that I learned and gained an appreciation for our little reptilian friends." At this he idly caressed the gilded statue of a striking cobra beside him. "It was in the depths of the forests in Peru where I was bitten for the first time – and not the last mind you- by this magnificent slithering creature. For almost a week, I drifted in and out of Death's door until I found a way to overcome the delirium with herbs and some assistance by local bushmen. You see, Sasuke, my love. Life is all about experimentation. You must try, try, and try again until you get something right. And if becomes an abject failure, then you give up and find the next best thing."

He looked over his shoulder to ask slowly. "And do you want to know what that next best thing was?"

"The venom?" Sasuke replied wryly.

Orochimaru grinned and nodded fervently. "Yes. Yes, my dear one. The snake's venom. You see, these brilliant although barbaric bushmen, had discovered the potency and effectiveness of its toxins. However, they were too uncivilized to go beyond the basic treatment procedures. I came to realize that the bushmen – especially their elders – were inflicted with that unfortunate disease called cataract. So yes, it wasn't exactly the Uchiha curse, but at least it was enough for me to test my theories on a few choice subjects. The results were mixed, but for the most part their vision improved by at least forty percent. Not bad for a preliminary test, eh?"

Sasuke could only watch as Orochimaru began to pace about; his steady steps hardly betraying how frail he looked. His voice would rise and fall with his excitement as he recounted his escapades; traveling to different countries, each time using more ingredients to finally come up with something that could cure at least eighty percent of blindness.

"The problem was," he breathed with a sudden stop. "I was so busy treating the _wrong_ people. Do you see? How else was I to know if the drug worked if I had no Uchiha to work with? And so I decided to return to Japan and start with the search for any member of your clan who wasn't stuck behind these walls. There were quite a few of you in the cities, but to my chagrin – none had the ability."

"Did you kill them?" came the calm question that did not betray the simmering heat building within Sasuke as he imagined just how many young men (or women) Orochimaru had rounded up in his quest for guinea pigs.

"Now, my dear -"

"It's a simple question. Did you kill them?"

"…it wasn't my fault," came the low response. " that some of them reacted quite badly to the drug."

"How?"

"Now, now, we mustn't go into those particulars -"

"_How_ did it affect them?" Sasuke snapped coldly; still holding Orochimaru's gaze prisoner. "I want to know everything."

For a moment, it seemed as if Orochimaru had no plans to respond to this demand, but eventually he sank into his throne-like chair and crossed his legs; a cold smile now on his pallid features. "You want to know everything? Are you sure you can stomach it, my love?"

"I've seen and heard worse."

"As you wish." Orochimaru grinned to show his fangs. "Yes, I killed the women for I had no use for them, plucked out their eyes and tested the serum on them. Most of the eyeballs burst on immediate contact, the ocular pressure too much to handle, while others shrived up as if dehydrated. Now imagine that happening while the eyeballs are _still_ in their sockets. It was a messy affair for the most part." He shrugged lightly and eyed his fingernails. "Should I apologize for that?"

Sasuke revealed nothing, though he was sure Orochimaru might have noticed the slight tightening of his jaw. Otherwise, he kept his features as neutral as possible and in a voice that did not betray the emotions welling up inside, he asked coolly. "What happened when you returned here?"

"Ah yes," Orochimaru began with a snap of his fingers. "Well, after an unsuccessful series of experiments, I decided to come straight to the lion's den. Here." He said with a wave of his hand around the room. "Of course back then, it wasn't this beautiful. Your father had no taste in the finer things in life. Neither did Mikoto now that I think of it.

"Speaking of Fugaku…my how the years had changed him. I had only been gone for about ten years, but during that time, he became a changed man. Gone was the unsure soldier I had met on the battlefield. Instead, I was looking at the new head of the Uchiha clan; cocky, bold, and downright disagreeable in the worst way. He had married your mother – who I'm sure was a lovely woman, but I must be honest, revolted me on sight – and there was of course your delectable older brother – who was about four years old at the time. I need not tell you that I fell in love with his eyes the moment I saw them. Now, now," Orochimaru added with a chuckle as he noted the involuntary jerk this elicited from Sasuke. "No need to get hasty. I wasn't going to be foolish enough to use your brother as an experiment. I was in the midst of a buffet of beautiful young men to work with, but I had to get in your father's good graces first.

"I managed to convince him that I had found a cure for the blindness, and reminded him of his promise to make me second-in-command when he was in charge. Now, your father might have been a self-righteous jackass for the most part, but he was a man of his word and he kept it. He lobbied hard for my position against the better judgment of the other members of the Uchiha governing board or whatever they were called, and I did my best to convince them I was their best option for getting good press coverage to the rest of the world. You see, you all might have been the revered watchdogs of Japan, but you weren't exactly loved by many. Hence, with me in the forefront – me the decorated war 'hero' who disappeared for ten years and suddenly returned to the limelight – I was the perfect representative for your pathetic clan."

He paused and smiled at Sasuke as if in pity.

"I know it's a terrible thing to hear such insults about your history and lineage, but let's be honest…I did you all a favor. Your clan would have become extinct anyway…I simply sped up the process. However, I digress from the original story. Now where was I? Oh right…being in the spotlight. Yes, yes, I hobnobbed with all the government leaders, prime minster, emperor, members of the DIET and of course through all that, I got reacquainted with that bastard, Danzo. It seemed like he too had been trying to get his way into Fugaku's good graces but your father wasn't buying it. Like your grandfather before him, Danzo wasn't exactly a likable person. That poor son-of-a-bitch. All the same, I enjoyed his attempts to try to get me to like him. In several meetings we had, he tried to convince me that with his connections in the underworld and my connections to the police, we could be a strong team. I could take over Byaku-Shinkyou or rather _he'd_ be the face of this establishment, while I ran things in the background."

He suddenly laughed out loud as if hearing the funniest joke in the world.

"I loved that stupid plan, but had no intention of letting it come to fruition…that is until your father became too big-headed." The laughter stopped and he scowled at Sasuke. "You see, when your father received a phone call from the Prime Minister with the promise of becoming the new Minister of Defense, he felt it necessary to become a first-class asshole to me. How quickly he forgot all I had done for him. It was **I** who had lobbied for him, **I** who had wined, dined, paid off and slept with a few of those sleazy fat cats at the DIET to get him the votes needed for that position, but what does your dear ol' Dad do? He suddenly decides he no longer needs me."

Sasuke's eyes narrowed. "You're lying."

Orochimaru sneered. "Am I?"

"Yes," came the quiet reply. "Because Itachi told me otherwise. He was there the night Father got the phone call and the first thing he did was to think of calling _you_ to share the good news. He was even going to consider asking you to join him or perhaps run Byaku-Shinkyou whenever he was stuck in Tokyo, but you and Danzo were just too impatient, weren't you? Besides…" Sasuke's jaw worked. "The reports were beginning to come in about missing officers and civilians within the grounds. You kept experimenting on us even after you had sold my father the lie that the serum he was administering to the elders was the real deal. Still you weren't just satisfied with the eyes, you started getting interested in the entire workings of the Uchiha make-up. You mutilated bodies, desecrated them as if they meant nothing to you after you were done with your sick, perverted -"

"All for a good cause, my love -"

"Like hell!" Sasuke roared as his control finally snapped.

He moved so fast that even Orochimaru had to admire the way in which his beloved protégé was able to attack without warning. However, he was more than ready, as he all but slid out of the chair – narrowly missing the _katana_ by an inch (tendrils of his hair whispered to the floor ) - and reaching out with his walking stick to strike the leg he had noticed Sasuke favoring earlier.

_(goddamnit!)_

Sasuke should have known that was coming, but it still didn't lessen the flare of pain that raced through his entire being. He would have fallen if not for bracing himself against the chair and with all the strength he could muster, he pushed it toward Orochimaru who danced out of the way, but not fast enough. Sasuke's _katana_ flashed through the air and took out a chunk of his robe.

This seemed to infuriate the older man, for his features grew ugly with this emotion. He struck out with his stick again – which Sasuke could now see could elongate by some kind of unseen mechanism – and knocked the _katana_ away from his grip. And though his leg was giving him all kinds of hell, Sasuke leaped as high as he could to dodge it, but only to find himself slammed hard against the wall as those cold fingers wrapped around his neck tightly.

"You've been nothing but trouble from the moment I met you," Orochimaru breathed against the blood-streaked and flushed face before him. He squeezed a little harder, but Sasuke stubbornly refused to whimper in pain. "Perhaps I should have killed you while I had the chance."

"Then…why…didn't…you…?" Sasuke rasped despite his throat burning as if someone had shoved a ton of hot coals down his throat. "What…stopped…you?"

For a long tension-filled minute inky black clashed with translucent green, and it was as if in that moment, both men were more than aware of just _why_ either hadn't chosen to eliminate the other when given the opportunity.

_(we were too connected from the start…)_

For Sasuke - if he really wanted to be honest with himself - he would boil it down to simply needing a father-figure in this most traumatized period of his life. While alive, Fugaku had always been too busy with work to notice him much, and Itachi (and his mother) had taken over that role albeit unsatisfactorily in some aspects. It was one thing to get a brother and mother's love, but no words could describe how much better it would have felt to have his father's approval in some way, shape or form. He wouldn't consider himself needy, but goodness knew how much he starved for that brand of affection…for some kind of acknowledgement from someone who would take care of him, praise him, cherish him and love him unconditionally no matter what.

And for an orphaned five or six-year-old, Orochimaru had filled that void perfectly.

Sasuke could still remember the kindness and warmth in that pale face the day he was discovered in that underground hiding place. He could remember the way Orochimaru had hugged him tight as if finding hidden treasure. Hell, if he thought hard enough, he was sure the older man had actually sobbed and over the years Sasuke had believed it was because Orochimaru was shocked at the carnage around him.

All the same, for the first few years, Orochimaru was all he had. He had willingly taken the place of Fugaku, Itachi and Mikoto. Orochimaru did all he could to be the perfect father-figure, confidant and friend. He was patient and kind, quick to give compliments and praises for any good thing Sasuke did. After the boy's regular school lessons, he would spend hours reading to Sasuke; both coming to learn how much they loved sharing bedtime stories.

They would go horseback riding, fishing trips, and boat rides. He bought Sasuke's first _katana_ – a fine weapon the boy had fallen in love with at first sight. He would invite the best entertainment in the form of clowns, dancers and actors to entertain the young boy whenever he wanted. Of course all of this had taken place within the grounds, and Sasuke had been too naïve to wonder why he was never let out of Byaku-Shinkyou to see the real world.

And every night – no matter how long a day he had at the office – Orochimaru would always return to his bedside to kiss him goodnight.

"You know I love you, don't you?" he'd begin the nightly ritual as Sasuke would nod; his heart thumping with happiness that Orochimaru hadn't forgotten to see him.

Orochimaru brushed aside the lock of hair that fell across his forehead, a warm smile on his visage. "And you know I'll never let anything or anyone hurt you, right?"

"Yes," came the low whisper.

"You know I'll take care of you always…no matter what."

"I know…"

"And that no matter what anyone says about your Uncle Orochimaru, I love you more than anything else in the world, right?"

"Right."

"You remember all I've taught you?"

"Yes." For within the story-tales, Orochimaru would regale Sasuke with tales of sin and impurities, of why Byaku-Shinkyou was slowly beginning to look 'different', of why there was the need to build such a huge arena, and why his dear Uncle was so weighed down by all the ugliness in the world. According to the Great Book Orochimaru would sometimes read from (and with tears in his eyes on some nights), it was clear that this filthy world needed to be 'cleaned'. Why God Himself had ordained Orochimaru to purge those filthy beings from existence, and one day he hoped that Sasuke would take over the glorious role when his time came.

"I only want what's best for you," Orochimaru would whisper before placing a kiss on Sasuke's forehead. "Don't ever forget that. No matter what happens, always know I want the best for you. I would never…ever hurt you, my dearest one. _Never_. Goodnight, my dear one."

He rose to his feet and prepared to leave, when three trembling whispered words froze him in his tracks. He slowly turned back to the boy, who looked embarrassed at what he had just said, and for the first time in his life, Orochimaru could safely say that his heart had been stolen by someone else.

_(I guess this is what a real father must feel like…or is it? Would a father's heart skip a beat at just hearing those words? Would a father feel tongue-tied and unable to think coherently for a few minutes? Would a father want to cradle that small frame to his body, wanting to touch him a way that would make him repeat those words over and over again. No…this isn't father-like at all. What I feel is…what I want is…I want…)_

"Is everything okay, Uncle?" came the question so full of innocence, that Orochimaru had to literally turn away from those large beautiful dark eyes that were filled with so many unspoken questions.

"Go to sleep, Sasuke," came the gruff reply. "I'll see you in the morning."

Perhaps that was the turning point in their relationship…or rather the presence of that voice-of-reason – Saratobi Asuma eventually making his authority known. Looking back now, Orochimaru could almost laugh at the irony of it all, for Hiruzen-sensei's last name had been Saratobi as well! It was more than likely that the old man had sent his reincarnation to give him hell, and it had come in the form of slowly poisoning his precious Sasuke's mind despite his many attempts to pull him into his world of sin and decadence.

"You broke my heart so many times," Orochimaru moaned as if in pain; his grip around Sasuke's neck weakening slightly which was a good thing or Sasuke was sure he was going to pass out. "You broke my heart -"

"As you did mine after that night," Sasuke finally admitted when he felt he could speak again. His voice, however, was nothing more than a harsh whisper. "In a way, I felt that saying those words might have made you angry with me, and foolish as I was, I made the decision to do everything to get back to your good graces. I wanted to become _perfect_ for you, so I went along with all you asked me to…for the most part."

Orochimaru gave a wan smile. "It was my mistake to send you to that god-forsaken temple to spend time with those idiotic monks. Perhaps if I had kept you here…I might have broken you a little bit more."

"Maybe…maybe not. I was lucky in more ways than one." Sasuke took a deep breath and with a light grunt shoved off Orochimaru's arm. Surprisingly the older man did not protest, but simply watched Sasuke with interest as if eager to hear where this story ended.

"I met someone who was finally able to do the one thing you tried so much to do over the years and failed."

"I'm assuming you mean the son of Namikaze Minato?" Orochimaru replied with a smirk.

"Yes," came the quiet but blunt answer. "Uzumaki Naruto…that's his name."

Orochimaru straightened up. "Of course. Uzumaki Naruto. The one who is giving Shimura Danzo and indeed all of the underworld a shake up as we speak. I am impressed with your choice of a male partner, Sasuke. At least I can take pride in knowing I taught you to have good taste."

He began to laugh, but stopped when he noticed that Sasuke had an expression on his features that brought a flush of humiliation to his cheeks. What the hell was with that look? _Pity?_ Could it be possible that this little runt was actually feeling sorry for him? The very thought of it was –

"The past year taught me a lot of things…so many more things than I learned being with you for sixteen years," Sasuke began quietly. "I made friends…real friends, not the ones you force fed me with. I developed genuine relationships with people who didn't demand or expect too much from me. I found my brother again after you selfishly took away my family from me. I discovered who I _could_ be and who I _should_ be without you, and I came to realize that I had so much more self-worth than you ever gave me credit for. I found…"

At this point he swallowed tightly and took a deep breath to finish off what he was determined to say; while praying that a certain someone would forgive him for being so presumptuous.

"I found someone who loves and cares for me despite my flaws, and the most important thing of all…that I was finally able to realize I had the capability to love and forgive as well. I don't know if you ever really felt that in your life, Orochimaru, and my job isn't to psychoanalyze your insecurities and inner demons. I know that you must have loved me in some way…however, weird and unorthodox it was, but it wasn't the kind I was looking for. I realized I was always searching for it…acceptance and belong…in the wrong places, and by believing that if I could keep you happy…it would eventually come. I guess that is what Asuma was trying to tell me all those years, and I refused to listen."

He stopped talking to notice that his words were having some kind of effect on Orochimaru. That face seemed even more haggard as if his true age was finally being revealed with every word uttered from his lips.

Orochimaru tried to form words, but nothing came out. He couldn't even move as he watched the younger man begin to limp away to find his sword.

_Come back,_ he wanted to say. _Come back to me, Sasuke. You belong to me. You'll need me eventually. All of this…this life of yours is nothing more than illusion. They don't care about you like I do. They'll abandon you eventually. You're nothing without me! You hear me! You are nothing without me!_

_(I need you)_

"I'm going to go now…" Sasuke was saying without looking at him. He had found his _katana_ and seemed to be admiring it with a blank expression. "I don't even think you're worth killing. You're nothing but a shell of yourself, and if not soon…you'll eventually die from whatever it is you are doing to yourself. Maybe I'll return the favor and lock you in one of your self-designed dungeons to rot away. Besides…there's carnage taking place outside and I have to stop it before even more people get killed." He paused and then continued in a voice that sent chills down Orochimaru's spine. " I have learned all I can from you, Orochimaru. Now, I have a bigger canvas to work with."

At the sound of those last words, Orochimaru could feel the years of pain, anger, humiliation and hate rushing back in a tidal wave that was overwhelming in its intensity. It was Saratobi Hiruzen looking at him with pity and fear as his interests grew more macabre as that short letter of farewell he had left behind now seemed to be flung back to his face from beyond the grave. It was his insane mother all over again; a woman who discarded him and refused to acknowledge his existence beyond the veil of madness, distrust and hate. It was those bullies in the tunnels taunting and laughing as they called him the worst names. It was the thousands of human sacrifices – the Uchiha clan to be exact - he had used to better himself all clamoring for screaming space within his mind; stifling him, making him want to go mad with their rising voices determined to make his mind unravel completely.

_(sinsinsinnersinnersinneryoumustbepurifiedyoumustb epurifiedyoumustbepurifiedyoumustyoumustyoumustyou must!)_

_Shut up! Shut up! Shut up all of you! I have done nothing wrong!_

He dove for Sasuke with a desperate man's lunge; his claws for fingernails almost making contact with the back of the young man's shirt.

"Come baa -!"

His voice would be forever frozen in mid-cry as that once proud head sailed through their air in a near-graceful arc. It would descend – as if on cue – upon his overthrown throne; the mass of black hair nearly shielding the still frozen face of haggard shock and mouth ajar. His blood – almost black with its thickness – trickled down the chair and the subsequent _thud_ of the lanky body falling to the floor would be the almost anti-climactic conclusion to his death.

_Gudan._

The final purification; a ritual conceived and nurtured from the mind of a mad man.

How ironic.

For a long minute Sasuke could only stand there watching his handiwork; his mind unable to process just what had taken place. He couldn't tell you _when_ he moved to deliver the final strike, but he could tell you that it had almost felt like he had sliced through 'nothing'. It had been that _fast_.

As if compelled by invisible strings, he walked toward the slightly twitching body. Sasuke had seen a lot of bloody stumps over the years, but there was something decidedly grotesque (yet mildly fascinating) about Orochimaru's. He observed it for a moment before promptly using the tip of his still blood-drenched _katana_ to rip open the sleeves of the robes. He had to confirm his theories, and he could almost gloat at how correct he was.

_(no wonder he always favored long sleeves)_

Sasuke had had the misfortune of seeing Orochimaru naked once or twice, the older man always made sure it was when he was in semi-darkness…and for good reason. The needle marks all over his fore and upper arms told of a man who must have eventually succumbed to his need for the serum (or venom) he stubbornly believed would keep him young and full of vitality for years to come. Sasuke would later come to discover that he had not only injected himself with the toxins, but had gone as far as performing transfusions with blood supplied by the countless Uchiha he had murdered over the years . Subsequent notes and journals discovered would also reveal just how dark and troubled Orochimaru's thoughts had become.

_(someday he would be able to gain the cursed abilities of the clan and if so create an army of special soldiers infused with the same abilities)_

"You sick bastard," came the quiet words with no inflection. He ripped the robes a little more to reveal the skinny pale chest, where it wasn't surprising to see that a port had been infused into the skin. This was how Orochimaru performed his transfusions apparently, but Sasuke – at the time – only saw it as another bizarre fetish by the man he had once considered mentor. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes, and without lifting his lashes, he plunged the _katana_ right through a heart that was almost visible.

He lifted his lashes, withdrew the blade and stepped away; deliberately ignoring the severed head with eyes that still seemed to plead with him to reconsider his decision. He waited for the feeling of elation and victory, the way it always appeared to be in the movies and fantasy tales where the hero gave a roar of celebration, and fireworks and rays of sunshine would burst through clouds to signal the beginning of a new dawn.

_(empty. Liberating yes…but empty all the same)_

He could almost hear the ghostly voices of his ancestors…of his clan…finally breathing sighs of relief. The persecution and ethnic cleansing had finally come to a cold and bitter end.

_(but at such a terrible and unnecessary cost)_

The shakes would eventually come with a vengeance, and he'd have to sag onto a chair to control himself (and ease the throb on his injured leg). It was now more than likely that he'd limp for the rest of his life, but that thought was pushed to the back of his mind as he felt the first stirrings hysteria rising to the surface.

For years, most of all he had done was a build-up to this point ; of imagining how killing Orochimaru would be and now…and now…

"Hahaha…hahaha...hahahaha!"

He couldn't stop laughing – a loud bitter sound that seemed to be a mingle of a scream and cackling at the same time. He laughed until his stomach hurt. He laughed until the tears sprang to his eyes. He laughed until it felt that the whole world was laughing maniacally with him. It was the way he would be found by Lee and Neji, who arrived at the scene several minutes later.

Neither man dared say anything as they surveyed the room in solemn silence. Somehow they must have understood just what Uchiha Sasuke was going through, so they would give him a moment to 'grieve' and gather himself together as best he knew how. Besides, only one person was likely to be a welcome source of comfort to him, and that person – despite his earlier decision not to follow them – had still joined their party in the end.

Only time would tell how the final healing process would begin for both brothers. Only time would tell…


	43. 43: Arise from the Shadows and Ashes

**Notes:** …is it normal to want to cry at the end of a chapter? And I wrote the damn thing…and maybe the readers won't even feel it and then I'll be the only pathetic one sobbing at what I had written? Ah well. *deep cleansing breaths* It's drawing to a close folks. We've got maybe one or two more chapters and then this epic is complete. But before we all begin saying our farewells, enjoy this update, eh? And as always, I thank you from the bottom of my heart for sticking with this story, and taking the time to leave some kind of feedback. It's very much appreciated! (((hugs)))

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><p><strong>Chapter 43<strong>

**Arise from the Shadows and Ashes**

_Though a swift stream is  
>Divided by a boulder<br>In its headlong flow,  
>Though divided, on it rushes,<br>And at last unites again._

_**Emperor Sutoku**_

* * *

><p><em>Naruto:<em>

**Yoyogi, Shibuya**

**Tokyo Prefecture**

_Yakuza_ basics 101 – never stay in one place for too long especially if you're a _'ronin'_ like me. In other words, have as many bases as possible to throw off potential spies, and since Shika's announcement about Danzo now aware of who I was, we had no other option but to move to this nondescript apartment building smack-dab in the southern part of Shibuya. I wasn't under any pretense that I wouldn't be discovered eventually, but I hoped it would at least buy me a little more time to set some kind of plan together before an encounter with my next nemesis.

We arrived in the wee hours of the morning, and even though every fiber of my being begged for repose, it was impossible to keep my eyes closed for more than five minutes. The rhythmic soothing sounds of the cooling system did not help, and every steady _tick tock tick tock_ of the clock on the wall was like a ticking time bomb just waiting to go off. I kept seeing Ikegami's face as I shot him; replaying every minute spent in his presence as if analyzing a documentary of my life in real time. A part of me almost didn't believe I had actually taken the life of the most wanted and dangerous man in the country, and at times I could feel a bubble of hysteria threatening to rise to the surface as I imagined the headlines that would make the papers once his death was announced.

**FINALLY! THE DEATH OF A FAMOUS UNDERWORLD BOSS!**

**[The world thanks Uzumaki Naruto for his service! Citizens demand that he become**

**the new Emperor of Japan!]**

_Yeah, right._

Roku and Mittsu had left with a few others to 'clean-up' as best they could, leaving Shichi and Itsutsu for bodyguard duties. The rule was to leave a symbolic sign of Ikegami's actual death at the site, but I would have the honors of presenting the body (his head) to his loyalists when the time came. It was going to be the final proof of the Bakufu's demise, and who better to break the news to his blind followers but the murderer himself.

In the meantime -

_(he's looking for you – he knows who you are now – and he's looking for you)_

I raised my arm and studied the faint scar on my forearm where he had carved his mark of my allegiance to him. I was going to have to face him, and unlike Ikegami who wasn't afraid to deal with me head on, Danzo was more than likely to use a trick or two to lure me out to the open before taking me out quickly. I had never seen him operate a weapon of any kind since our introduction, which led me to believe that he was more than content to let others do **all** his dirty work.

How the hell do you deal with a man like that?

**(tick tock tick tock tick tock)**

"Fuck this," I finally whispered in resignation. What was the point of forcing it?

I swung my legs off the bed and reached for my sweatpants to slip into. Without bothering to wear a tee-shirt (I was still hot despite the cool apartment), I padded barefoot into the Spartan living room where Shikamaru was sprawled on the couch with mouth slightly open in deep sleep. The temptation to stick something in there – yes, childish I know – overwhelmed me, but I resisted the urge and made my way into the small room that served as a 'communications center' with a soft click of the door behind me for some privacy. It was not much of a 'center' since it had only a low desk and a telephone with lines that were not easy to trace. I sat on the floor and crossed my legs, but only to hold my suddenly aching head between my trembling hands. I counted inwardly to ten to stop the sudden attack of the shakes (funny how those seem to come when you least expect), and when I was sure I wasn't going to pass out anytime soon, I grit my teeth and picked up the telephone's receiver with more force than necessary.

_Time's a-wasting, Naruto._

I dialed the familiar number and almost as if he had been waiting for my call, he replied at the first ring.

"If you're calling me at this hour, I'm assuming you were successful," came the calm matter-of-fact statement that brought a reluctant smile to my face and made what I had done seem even more than justified.

"Heh…" was all I could manage, though I couldn't stop the slight puff of my chest in satisfaction. I'm sure he must have had his doubts that I could do it.

He exhaled a breath of air, and I could hear the smile in his voice now. "And how do you feel, Mr. Avenger?"

_How do I feel?_ I looked up at the bland white ceiling and pouted. "I'm not sure yet," I eventually replied carefully. "I've still got one more person to deal with and when that's over…I'll let you know."

"Hmm." He paused and then returned, his tone now a bit more grave. "Danzo is not an easy one to deal with. He might not come at you physically, but he is more than likely to try to weaken you psychologically. How do you plan to go about it?"

"He's already searching for me," I responded with an absent-minded caress of the band-aid Shika had applied to my wound. "But I think I'll make things easier for the both of us and call him up for a rendezvous."

"Be careful," Jiraiya warned again and there was something so…_paternal_ about those two words that brought a lump to my throat. I knew I had my doubts about him sometimes; wondering if he was simply using me just to regain his position on top of the _yakuza_ world, but Shika's reminder that I was the one who had dragged Jiraiya out of retirement in the first place, and that I had chosen him to take over when all of this was over, made my initial feelings of resentment and distrust seem ridiculous. So far, he's proven to be a precious confidant and pillar of strength at times when I felt I couldn't go on. Listening to some of his banter and fun conversation on darker days had helped to make the difficulty of my situation more bearable. He reminded me of my humanity and that was something I clung onto like a drowning man to driftwood in a turbulent storm. I needed that stability and between he and Shikamaru…I felt I could still be 'normal' enough to fit in with the rest of society.

"…news from up North…"

I forced my thoughts back to the present. "What was that?"

"I said there's been some news from Gaara regarding the _daimyōs_ and their decisions to assist with the fight up North."

I perked up with excitement at this nugget of information; my heart now a thudding drumbeat within my chest. "Are you saying…?"

_(They did it! I don't fucking believe it! Sasuke…you finally did it! Yes!)_

"Don't get too happy, you little rascal," Jiraiya said with a laugh. "Gaara said that they did agree to send in reinforcements, so if Orochimaru's planning some kind of war, he's going to have his hands full. However, I've still to hear anything from Itachi or Shisui, but if I do receive a wire, I'll relate to you immediately. I'm sure you're more than anxious to know if they were successful."

I bit my lower lip and nodded with an inner sigh. So much for bringing my hopes up.

"Sure…you do that," I muttered and tried to stifle an unexpected yawn, though a part of me knew that I would have gladly killed anyone to even hear one little piece of news about Sasuke. Yes, yes, call me an inconsiderate lovesick moron, but I honestly couldn't give two shits about the war itself, all I cared about was if Sasuke had gotten to confront Orochimaru and taken him out. What if that creepy psycho had done something awful to him? I couldn't and didn't want to think of all the disgusting plans he might have for Sasuke (or even Haku since I knew that kid was going to be stuck by his side like glue). God! It was enough to make my stomach turn with revulsion.

_I swear as soon as this thing is over, I'm taking the first train up there to - _

"Get some sleep and call me first thing in the morning," Jiraiya's orders interrupted my line of thought. "There's something I need to speak to you abou-"

**Click.**

_Huh? What the…?_

"Hello? Hello?!" I pressed the re-dial button repeatedly, but was met with an eerie silence that was unnerving. There wasn't even a dial tone and assuming I might have unplugged the phone by mistake, I checked quickly.

(still plugged in)

_Fuck._

I knew it then – a little too late – but then again, I should have been more aware of my surroundings.

_Goddamnit-!_

I would have just enough time to replace the phone's receiver, when the door was kicked open violently (damn thing nearly fell off its hinges) and I came face-to-face with a device that promptly sent nearly 150,000 volts of electricity right through my body.

_Holy shit! That hurts!_

Someone (me probably) gave an unearthly howl of agony, as my body collapsed to the floor and every nerve ending in my body screamed for some sort of coherence. It would have been enough to take me away, but apparently my attacker(s) weren't satisfied because another shocking dose was delivered; only this time, I was blissfully unaware of its effects as my mind simply couldn't take it anymore. Darkness beckoned, where the last thing I remember was hoping and praying that Shikamaru was still alive somewhere.

* * *

><p><em>Naruto? Naruto? Can you hear me?<em>

_Hmm? Yeah…I can…_

_I thought you were asleep. I wasn't sure._

_I was…you woke me up._

_Sorry…are you all right?_

_Yeah…no…I'm not sure…I feel funny._

_What's wrong?_

_You can see for yourself, can't you?_

_No…not really. It's dark in here._

_Ouch. Don't touch me like that, Sasuke. It hurts._

_Sorry…_

_I'm aching all over…_

_Your face feels wet…smells…bloody…_

_Shit. I guess that explains it._

_Can you move?_

…_no…seems like I'm stuck…_

_(sigh) I don't like this._

_I don't like it either, but you've gotta help me get out of here._

_I can't…_

_Why not?_

_I can't reach you._

_Funny har har. You just touched me a second ago._

_I know…but it's…strange…I want to help you. I really do._

_Then do it! Goddamn it. I-can't-fucking-move…!_

_Don't struggle like that. You're only going to make it worse._

_(breathe) (breathe) (breathe) What's happening…where am I?_

_I'm not sure either._

_I can't see anything. I can't…_

_You're just going to have to hang on, Naruto. Promise me that._

_I'll try, but I want to see you. It feels like it's been years since I saw you._

_I know. If you make it out of this, you know I'll be waiting._

_Where…where are you going? Your voice sounds like it's getting faint…_

_I have to leave now. I've got a lot of things to do over here._

_Don't leave me, Sasuke (breathe) please…I can't do this alone._

_You've been doing fine so far. Just hang on a little longer and it will be all over…_

_Don't go! Please! I need you!_

…_always…here…always…_

_Nonononono…SASUKE! COME BACK! COMEURG…!_

* * *

><p>"ARGH!" The scream was torn from my throat as my lashes – heavy as they felt – flew open at the sensation of being splashed with a bucket of icicles. It was nothing but water, but compared to how beat up and feverish my body was, they might have as well poured alcohol right into every wound inflicted so far.<p>

_(son-of-a-bitch)_

With my head lowered, drenched and shivering up a storm, my first blurred view was of my maroon-colored sweatpants…which was actually originally gray. It didn't take a scientist to know that the new shade was courtesy of all the blood pummeled out of me so far. I was still barefoot, and could wiggle my toes, but that was about it. Both feet were bound at the ankles with what felt like heavy chains akin to the kind you'd find within the dungeons at Byaku-Shinkyou. The same went for my wrists, which I tried to move, but my shoulders wailed in protest. They were shackled behind me on the chair I was sitting on – which felt more like concrete than an actual chair, but whatever.

My head was throbbing badly, and I wondered how many blows had been delivered to it so far.

_(can't remember a thing…)_

Maybe I blacked out (which would explain my weird 'dream' featuring you-know-who).

/I'm always with you…/

_Heh_._ Touching sentimentality, Sasuke, but damn I really do wish you were here to get me out of this mess._

My entire face felt like it was ten times its size. My eyes swollen, my nose felt like it had shifted its position, my lips were split, my mouth filled with imaginary but painful cotton balls, and my ears ringing with an incessant bell sound that wouldn't stop. Breathing was a little difficult as each time I tried to inhale, it felt as if my ribs and lungs were likely to quit in resignation at being made to work harder than necessary. I won't even bother trying to describe the fire churning within my torso. I feared I was bleeding internally, but what did I know? Just as long as I didn't start peeing blood from now on, I guess I could be fine.

_(ah fuck…I hope they are done with this…not sure I can take anymore)_

"I must commend you," came the quiet but strong voice that could only belong to one person. "You've lasted much longer than the others. Your tolerance for pain is admirable."

My immediate and alarmed thought was that Shika had been put through the same thing and hadn't survived. With an effort, I lifted my head and forced my eyes to open as wide as they could. I wanted to see the fucker's face and burn it into memory if this was going to be the last time I was allowed to do so.

I had no idea where we were, but Shimura Danzo seemed comfortable in a chair several feet away from me. Dressed in his usual full traditional garb – complete with his damned walking cane - he almost looked regal in our dismal surroundings. His eye patch today was brown leather, which almost matched the brace used to support his bum right arm.

"Jiraiya must have taught you well," came the commentary that sent an unwilling jolt down my spine. How long and how much had this bastard known? Perhaps he had known right from the beginning and was simply buying time…playing around with me…toying with me until this moment when he could exact his vengeance. I would laugh at the irony of it all if the very act didn't promise some more unwanted aches and pains.

But first things first.

"Where…is…Shikamaru?" I rasped; each word escaping my lips a lesson in tolerance and self-control. "What did you do to him?"

Danzo's good eye flickered with what looked like amusement. "Ah Nara. He put up a good fight, but…"

My heart froze and he must have noticed because a cold smirk came to his features. "Worried about him, are you? How touching. However, I can assure you he's fine…barely. I was going to bring his lady friend as well…to make things a little more interesting…but what's the point? You're the main dish, Uzumaki Naruto. Everyone else connected or related to you and your little plot are simply fodder that will be eliminated when the time comes."

"If you've killed him…" I growled.

Danzo held up a hand to silence me and seemed to nod toward someone behind me. "Please show our dear friend here that I am a man of my word."

At that order, thick fingers sought the roots of my hair and tugged my head upwards – almost snapping my neck in the process. I sucked in my grimace of pain and focused my gaze on the slowly grinding steel doors being opened behind Danzo. It was now clear we were in what must have been an abandoned meat factory, because the steel hooks that were usually used to hang the carcasses of dead animals now held the bloodied bodies of my dearest friend, and to my dismay the two swordsmen who were supposed to be guarding us on that night. How Danzo's henchmen had managed to take them out without their knowledge was amazing, but then again…had I really expected anything less from a man like him?

_(we should have been better prepared)_

"Shika…" I moaned in misery; deeply wishing he had listened to my advice and backed off with Temari while he still had the chance. If he ended up dying because of me, there was no doubt this would forever burn in my conscience until my last breath.

I watched in horror as another of Danzo's minions walked up to Shika and prodded his ribs with what looked like a black _bokken_, but at the howl of pain that escaped my friend's lips and the subsequent jerking motions his body made, it was clear that he was being electrocuted.

"Sto…Stop it!" I pleaded in a voice that felt raw and strained. "You've done enough!"

Danzo smiled and held up a hand again. The minion took note and stopped his torture, but hovered around in case he was needed. My hair was finally released, and I lowered my head with relief yet aware of that simmering layer of anger beginning to form within the pit of my stomach.

_(control yourself, Naruto. Remember what Jiraiya taught you. Control. Yourself.)_

"It's not likely he'll survive the night," Danzo mused. "That of course would depend on you -"

"How long have we been here?" I interrupted curtly.

"You don't remember?" Danzo asked with a raised brow. "Kaito must have struck you a little too hard if you're already suffering from short-term memory loss. It's been nearly twenty-four hours since you were captured, Naruto, and like I mentioned earlier, your stubbornness has been impressive. No matter how many times you were beaten or threatened, you would not say anything. You only wanted to see me, so…" He spread out his left arm as if inviting a hug. "Here I am at your request. I'm sure you have many questions for me, so I'll try my best to respond to them before I extinguish the flickering flame that is your life."

_A flickering flame, huh? _

"And what a life you've led," the man continued thoughtfully. "To think that you would rise from the ashes – literally – of Byaku-Shinkyou to become a man so powerful in the underworld in such a short period of time. It's like a fairytale…except yours will not have a happy ending as you might have factored into your plans of domination I'm sure." He paused and studied me for a long minute. "Perhaps I should have taken you more seriously from the moment Orochimaru made known who you really were. It seemed improbable that you would ever get to know the real story about your parents, but as fate would have it - and with the damned Uchiha brothers of all people -you learned the truth. Ah Fate. What cruel hands she deals with."

"You…Ikegami…and Orochimaru…" I began slowly with a smile, albeit painful, coming to my lips. "You three thought you could get away with it, didn't you? You set your goals so high, you forgot those you left behind…those who could return to trample all over those delusions of grandeur. Heh…ever heard of that word 'karma'?"

"Yes, but I do not believe in such fanciful tales of yore," came the conceited response. "It is nothing more than a situation of bad coincidences that could and should be avoided with proper means. In this case, our mistake was assuming that you and Kushina had been killed in the assassination attempt. I must give your mother more credit than she deserved. She must have crawled out of that house determined to make sure you survived."

The simmering anger was threatening to boil. However, I kept my expression neutral and simply watched him.

"Perhaps I have not explained myself to you well enough, Uzumaki Naruto…or rather I would have assumed that by now, you'd have known a little bit about my personality. I am not as fickle as Ikegami, whose only need for power was driven by greed. I am also not as maniacal as Orochimaru, whose quest for power came at the expense of his desire for dubious scientific knowledge and developing ocular powers akin to a cursed clan. Please do not compare his madness or Ikegami's weakness to my inherent desires."

"…to make Japan strong, right?" I sneered. "Wasn't that what you told me once? Some jargon about returning back to Isolationist ideals?"

He gave a wry grin and dared to look pleased. "So you do remember that conversation we had. I'm glad." With that, he lifted his hand to carefully remove the eye-patch. I wasn't sure of what to expect, but it definitely wasn't the strange red markings in the pupil. I would later (much later) come to learn that those weren't ordinary markings, but actually something Sasuke's ancestors had once possessed; the ability for their pupils to take on different shapes to define certain stages of their mental/ocular developments (or something like that). He had gotten his eye engraved with the symbol to impress Uchiha Madara back then. Needless to say, the Uchiha patriarch had not been swayed by Danzo's obvious suck-up methods. You would think the guy would have changed the design to something else, but I guess he was too proud to want to do so. To my disgust, Danzo tapped the eye with a fingernail before reaching in to pluck it out. Besides the little dribble of clear fluid that rolled down his cheek, I was now staring into a black void where his eye should have been.

"A little memento from the Great War," he explained as he whipped out a pristine white handkerchief to wipe the eye slowly. "I was shot with an arrow right through it, but as luck would have it…it didn't pierce its way to the brain. Guess who was a part of the surgical team to rescue me back then? Yes, Orochimaru. He would have been a fine doctor if he didn't have other such…bizarre interests."

He blew on the eye when finished wiping and lowered his head to pop it back in place. I watched as it rolled within the socket for a second before settling in. Thankfully, he replaced the patch and returned back to studying me with his good eye.

"I lost an eye for this nation in a war that could have been avoided only if we had more competent leaders," he eventually began lecturing. "On my hospital bed, I made the decision that once I returned to civilian life, I was going to do all I could to get to the top by any means necessary. It didn't really matter to me how I got there as long as I did as I'm sure you understand, Naruto. However, unlike my co-conspirators – as you so subtly did not state – I was determined to do things in a way that would come across as legitimate and acceptable to the Japanese people and that was where you dear father came in."

He sighed and rubbed his scarred chin – another remnant from the war, I'm sure – though I didn't want to know the story of how he got that one.

"Do not get me wrong, Naruto," he mused quietly. "Your father was a brave man…a wonderful man of character, and I was impressed with him. So impressed I even recommended him to become the next first lieutenant when Ikegami's father was looking for a replacement."

_Liar! You goddamn fucking liar,_ my mind screamed.

"Ikegami, on the other hand, had other plans…but I'm sure you must have heard this story before. You do not need me to go over it all over again." He gave a long-suffering sigh. "Bottom line, your father's decision to no longer work for me ruined everything. I could not understand why he would want to leave something so lucrative and expose all we had worked so hard for." His eye flashed with the memory of my father's betrayal, and I watched his left hand form a fist on the armrest.

"He defied me at every turn, Naruto. He refused my pleas and offers of fortune. I was going to make him more powerful than he could possibly imagine -!"

"You had my father whipped for defying you with his last mission to kill Uchiha Fugaku," I reminded him in a voice that was devoid of any emotion. "And when he fell in love with my mother, you knew then that you had to eliminate him, but something has always bugged me about that. Why were you so determined to take her out as well? She should have been no threat to you either way, right?"

He said nothing for a while until his shoulders began to shake gently as if he was about to have a seizure. It wasn't until the first rumble of his weird laughter began did I realize he wasn't about to go into convulsions. He shook his head lightly and then managed to compose himself.

"So I see Jiraiya or even the Uchiha brats didn't tell you everything about your dear mother." He rose to his feet with the aid of his cane and began to pace slowly before me. "Have you ever truly wondered about those scars on your cheeks, my dear boy?"

I frowned. "What's that got to do with anything? I saw the picture of my mother…she didn't have them."

"Yes, yes, of course she didn't, which makes you a rare breed indeed." He came to a stop before me; now much closer, so close I could have reached out to yank on his robe if my arms were released. He lifted the cane to tip my chin upwards, forcing me to look into that weathered face.

"Au contraire to all the stories you might have heard, it wasn't your father who was a descendent of the famous Senju line. It was your dear mother, Uzumaki Kushina."

_Huh?_

"She is a direct descendant of the Uzumaki clan – who were an offshoot from a distinct group of the Senju known for having whiskers like that of a fox or wolf on their faces." He proceeded to trace the outline of each of them with a fingernail, that I would have gladly bitten off if I wasn't too busy trying to process this new bit of information.

_(if he's telling me the truth that is)_

"_Ookami no Mibu, Kitsune no Mibu_," he drawled. "The feared men – and women - believed to be born from the loins of the _Kyubi no Kitsune_ itself. They were the real reasons the Senju were feared for many believed they possessed spiritual powers capable of destroying entire nations. Ridiculous, isn't it? It was also believed that every once in a generation, one such warrior with the markings of the _kyubi_ would be born, and though in the latter years that folklore became nothing more than stories senile grandparents would regale their children…who knew we'd be lucky to witness your birth in this lifetime. Kushina really was a special one indeed. So why? You might ask, was she never of interest to the Bakufu or Mibu or any of the Syndicates if they knew her story? Why that's simple…she was kept in the dark about her past as well. Her parents would never dare reveal who she really was for fear she'd be on their target list, so she was left to grow up as a 'normal' child, who had the misfortune of stealing away the man I wanted the most."

He stopped caressing my cheeks but only to deliver the mother of all slaps that knocked the wind out of my sails. My already throbbing face felt like it was on fire, and I watched dispassionately as droplets of my blood splattered on his robes. It didn't seem to bother him though, because he cupped my chin and squeezed so hard that tears sprang to my eyes.

"And now," he snarled; his breath hot and quickened against my feverish flesh. "From the grave she sends you to finish off what I started, but no…no…no. I will prove to them that I am not one to be messed with; in this life or the afterlife!"

He released me, but only to slap me again…and again…and again until I guess his arm got tired. By this time, my mouth was already filled with so much blood, all I could do was watch it dribble down my chest and torso to soak my already stained pants.

"And that…" Danzo panted as I heard him wipe his hands on his handkerchief. "Is just the beginning of the fun. I will take pleasure torturing you slowly, Uzumaki Naruto, before setting about recovering all that you've stolen…yes, _stolen_ from Ikegami and myself. His death…and kudos to you on achieving that by the way…will only make things easier for me. I plan to parade you as a scum of society…perhaps take a few pictures of you in this state to reveal to Japan just what I have to deal with to get things cleaned up in this country. Then, I will take credit for the elimination of Ikegami – naturally. Everyone knows about my crusade against them over the years, so this fits perfectly into my plans. I must thank you again for doing the brunt of the work. Now…if you'll all excuse me, I have some important phone calls to make."

"Waste…of…time…" I panted before raising my head to give him a smile that I was sure looked gruesome with the state of my face. All the same, he stopped and turned around to glare at me.

"It's over for you," I whispered, still smiling even though I prayed that all I was about to say was actually happening or bound to happen. "There is no place for you to return to when you get out there. The world you've always known and believed in no longer exists. Ikegami is dead. The Mibu will take control of the Bakufu or are about to make it known even as we speak. I now own over half of the country, and nothing you say or do can change that at this point; not even if you kill me." I sneered and spat out a wad of blood. "As for those damned Uchiha brothers…well, let's just say their revenge is going to be ten times sweeter. Orochimaru will die and Byaku-Shinkyou will return to its rightful owner. Your supposed chokehold on the military will no longer exist and once Gaara wins his seat on the council…you can kiss off any chance of you even being considered as a worthy member of this nation goodbye."

"So do us all a favor, Shimura Danzo, and go crawl into a dark space to do the honorable thing. If I don't kill you myself, my people will continue to hunt you down for the rest of your miserable life. You'll have nowhere to go…nowhere to run. You'll become an outcast in a country you felt you could control. No one will give a shit about you, do you understand?" And to make sure I drilled it into his thick skull, I repeated my words slowly and concisely.

"You. Are. No. Longer. Needed."

There was a deafening silence at the end of my speech, only interrupted by the sound of his heavy breathing as if struggling to control himself from whacking me to death with his walking cane.

"Kaito!" he finally snapped thunderously.

"Sir!"

"Keep yourself busy while I'm gone, but just enough for me to return to finish off the deed myself. Understood?"

"Yes, sir!"

I heard the eager crack of knuckles and mentally prepared myself for what was to come. Oddly enough, I felt somewhat at peace with this, because the last thing I'd see would be Danzo's furious countenance as he stormed away. I had given him plenty to think about. It was only left to see what my (short) future held for me.

If I survived that is…

* * *

><p>…<em>so where am I now?<em>

I lifted my lashes slowly; the sensation of something soft and comfortable on my naked skin making me writhe in pleasure. There was something quite familiar about this setting, but I knew it couldn't be real because the last thing I remember was being tied up in a chair in some abandoned factory about to get the beating of my life –

"Finally awake?" came the quiet voice that had me turning my head quickly to notice my companion. Talk about one's heart leaping into one's throat and unstoppable tears springing to the eyes. My breath hitched and for a moment, words formed but nothing could escape my parted lips.

_(not real…not…real…)_

"Sasu…Sasuke," I eventually managed to croak out as if testing the weight of his name on my tongue.

"You've been asleep for a long time, Naruto," he murmured with a small smile; his fingers reaching out to trace the outlines of my whiskers tenderly.

Desperate, I grabbed and held them tightly against my cheek, closing my eyes and hoping this was reality. That God had somehow delivered me from that factory, sent me back here just so I could be with him one last time. I knew it was improbable, but I could smell _him_…smell _us _from the heady musk we had created together during our throes of passion. I wanted to lick his sweat-dampened flesh, to even bite into it to make sure he was actually with me. When I lifted my lashes again, he was still there (though with a slightly bemused expression on his visage) as the early morning sun's rays – drifting from the curtains - bathed him in an ethereal glow.

"Is everything all right?" he asked warily.

"Now that you're here," I replied, feeling my cheeks burn as I watched his turn rosy at my corny statement. He rolled his eyes and tried to withdraw, but I wouldn't have it.

"Don't…" I implored thickly. "Don't leave me again."

"Where else would I go?" he replied with slight exasperation as if admonishing me for being so silly. He squirmed a little beneath me, but only to get more comfortable before wrapping his arms around my waist to hold me prisoner.

_(something…still isn't right…)_

"Funny…" I began carefully.

"Hmm? What's funny?" he asked with a tender kiss placed in the hollow of my neck. He writhed delightfully against me again and there was no mistaking the obvious nudge of his erection against my torso. Sorry to sound so crude, but God help me. I wanted to fuck him so bad, it hurt. However, I had to make sure of something first.

"It's funny that I'm here with you again."

"Again?" He shook his head and captured my lower lip between his teeth gently. He released it and gave me that look that was a cross between wanting to kick my ass or hug me to death. "You've always been here, Naruto. We haven't left this room since we arrived. No one ever gets to leave this place, remember?"

I felt my insides crawling with fear. "Wha…what do you mean?"

"I mean…" He smiled then, but instead of perfect white teeth, I was horrified to find that his mouth was beginning to fill with what looked like a million roaches or bugs of some sort squirming within it. "We've been here, Naruto. We've been waiting for you."

His face changed; those dark locks becoming shocking pink…the black eyes becoming a familiar pale sea-green that stared at me accusingly.

"…don't you remember, Naruto?" This version of Sakura asked. "Don't you remember? I said I would always wait for you."

"No…no…no…" I moaned in dismay. _This couldn't be happening!_

The face changed again and this time it was Kojima complete with his gold tooth and tattoos. I wanted to scream, but he held me a vice grip and snarled into my face. "Remember everything, Fox Boy. Remember everything! You must!"

"LEAVE ME ALONE! ALL OF YOU!" I wailed with despair.

_(not Sasuke too…please God…he can't be dead too!)_

And with all the strength I could muster in my body, I jerked away from him…from _them_…

* * *

><p>…and landed painfully on cold, hard concrete.<p>

_(FUCK!)_

I must have jerked in my chair so hard that I fell over. All the same, my agonies paled in comparison to the sudden deafening sound of a gunshot…screams…yells…and then another gunshot…more yells and screams…until I was sure I was in the middle of an unexpected gunfight.

_(What the hell's going on?!)_

Panicked at the thought of a stray bullet getting to me, I desperately tried to release my bonds, but short of breaking my bones, there was just no way I was getting out of these damn chains.

_(please don't shoot me, please don't shoot…son-of-a-bitch!)_

Flakes of concrete nearly made me blind as several bullets ricocheted a few inches from my face. I squeezed my eyes shut and waited for the inevitable, already bracing for the impact of a stray bullet finding its way into my already damaged body. However, just as suddenly as it begun, the shoot-out ended with the pungent smell of gun smoke, the metallic hot stench of blood and some scrambling feet approaching my position.

_(is…is it over…?)_

"Did we get everyone?" came the loud command from a familiar voice, which had me doing a double take in disbelief.

_Impossible! Ka…Kakashi? But…how…?!_

"Naruto?" His voice was closer now and he knelt beside me. All I could see was the fine cloth of his pants, until –with a light grunt – he pushed my chair upside to peer into my face with concern. "Are you all right? Did you get hit…?" He paused at the question. "With a bullet I mean."

I shook my head, not trusting myself to speak, but that was enough for him. With a nod, he stood up and with help of someone else I did not recognize, but who was apparently on our side, they began to loosen up the shackles quickly.

"Sorry we were late," Kakashi was saying. "Roku told us the news that you were captured, but there were so many guards stationed here, he had to call for back up."

"I thought you were in Kyoto," I finally squeaked out as I rubbed my wrists slowly (man, they looked raw from chaffing against the chains) to get some circulation back into them.

Kakashi shook his head, "Jiraiya-sama sent me down here in case you needed help with Ikegami. I would have returned, but he was concerned when he said a phone call he had with you suddenly got disconnected."

"Ah…I see."

"Can you stand on your own?" he asked as he tried to help me to my feet, but having been tied down for so long and with all the pummeling I've taken so far, I could barely do so. Realizing this, the man who I had once considered an asshole, did the unthinkable. He hoisted me onto his back as if I was a child and ordered for me to hang on as he marched right through the carnage and into the mercifully cool evening. I could barely see at this point, but as I lay my aching head upon his strong back, I fought the urge to burst into childish tears of relief and gratitude.

_(I am still alive)_

Just barely…but I was still here, and that was all that mattered. Or not.

"Shika…" I began, and when Kakashi didn't respond, I asked louder. "Where is Shikamaru? Shichi? Itsutsu?"

He paused and I felt my heart sink into my stomach.

(Please tell me he made it. Please tell me he made it. Please, dear God! Let something go right just once!)

"Shichi's wounds were too severe," Kakashi finally replied quietly. "He was already dead by the time we arrived."

_Damn! And he was such a great guy too. _

"Shikamaru and Itsutsu were barely hanging on, but they've been taken to a hospital…which is where you'll be going to as well."

"No…"I began in protest, though my heart was relieved to know that at least two of them would be taken care of. I had to get to Danzo before he carried out his shitty plans, but Kakashi would have none of it. He silenced me with a cold glare as he helped me settle into the back seat of the van.

"Hospital first. Danzo will be taken care of, don't you worry. He knows you are no longer alone and he was foolish to do something like this in the first place. He's got nowhere to run or hide any longer." He then gave me a rare smile. "You've done most of the hard work, Naruto. Now sit back and let us complete what you've started. All right?"

I bit my already broken lower lip and tried to give one last fruitless protest, but something in his eyes had me swallowing that damn hard lump in my throat and finally nodding in weary resignation. He was right. For over six months, I had worked non-stop on my revenge. There was really nothing more I could do now but wait for all I had spilled to Danzo to finally come to fruition.

_(please let justice be served)_

As I closed my eyes and prepared to fall into dreamless sleep, I could almost believe that the sudden surge of warmth to flow through me were the approving hugs of my father and mother for a job well done. For years, their restless souls and untold stories had festered within this human vessel they left behind, and though it had taken time, I was so glad that their once murky legacies would now be re-written on a fresh page for generations to come.

_('Toosan…'Kaasan…)_

May you finally rest in peace.

* * *

><p><strong>A Month Later:<strong>

While I spent the next few weeks recuperating in an undisclosed hospital with a special ward for 'people-like-me' (read as a heavily-guarded area for my protection), the world – Japan in particular – continued to function as best it could.

Or at least it would have if it wasn't for the sudden influx of scandalous news that began to leak out day after day after day.

[All of this would be regaled to me later, as during that time I was either comatose or pumped so full of painkillers, I could barely say my name]

First off was the announcement of Ikegami Ryoichi's death, which shook the very foundations of the underworld as we knew it. Thanks to a thorough clean-up job by Roku and his fellow swordsmen, most of the general public assumed his death was courtesy of a simple feud between families. However, those powerful within the Syndicate families were aware of who was _really_ responsible for it.

(the _kage_ - a new nickname apparently created since the incident as the rumor mills swirled with how I had killed him 'in the shadows' like ninjas of the past)

As expected, loyalists to Ikegami tried to revolt against the Mibu Syndicate who had stepped in to control their territories. There were riots and civil unrest over the course of two days, but with the Mibu gaining more members (mostly thanks to some Bakufu expiates), these loyalists were effectively silenced and order was eventually restored. Since I couldn't be there to attend in person, it was up to Jiraiya to convene a meeting of the family heads, where he established the new Syndicate and restored its original name – _Senju_. Unfortunately, it wasn't all roses and sunshine, for quite a few of the Mibu were reluctant to join forces. I assume they must have realized how lucrative and better it would be if they agreed to this union. Besides, they were wise enough to realize just how powerful the Senju had become and going up against them was going to be a moot decision.

As per our plans, our first order of business was exposing all the extremely illegal affairs Ikegami and Danzo had gotten their hands into while in power. Documents showcasing Danzo's interests in sex trafficking, gun-dealings, drug trafficking, tax evasions, countless assassinations, and local terrorism – just to name a few - were released to the public with the help of Temari and Ōnoki's grand-daughter – Kurotsuchi (who did come by to visit me at the hospital and dare I say looked quite pretty and feminine for once). There was a heated debate on the DIET floor led by the new young star, Gaara (who won his elections by a landslide), where it was determined that Danzo, as well as the Prime Minister, the current Minister of Defense, and a few other unsavory members of the government, would be taken to the Supreme Court on trial and possibly sent to jail for the rest of their miserable lives.

To make matters worse for our dear friend, Danzo, the nation finally got wind of the turmoil up North. This time Akatsuki was brought to the forefront as news conferences were held where the truth about Orochimaru and his connections to aforementioned unsavory government characters, were finally revealed. Orochimaru's death was ruled as 'accidental' and part of the bloody riots that took place within the grounds of Byaku-Shinkyou. A disastrous affair all around as almost two hundred lives were lost in the senseless skirmish.

However, all of that was almost overshadowed by the stunning bombshell that the Uchiha brothers were still alive! Photographs (not current actually) of the handsome (and very eligible) young men were splashed all over the news, and many of the Uchiha who had remained in hiding over the years began to crawl out of the shadows; eager to return back to their homestead to begin the rebuilding process.

And though the brothers never actually stood before the cameras for some contrived press conference, Itachi did manage to grant one non-televised interview to one of the most trusted media outlets in the country. He didn't give much away except to say that "there was a lot of work to be done and we would really like our privacy at this time." Sasuke could not be reached for any comment.

_(typical)_

The government (Emperor actually) wanted to do some sort of public apology crap for all the trouble they had caused the Akatsuki for they were under the impression (all thanks to Danzo and Co.) that they were a terrorist organization. However, neither brother was interested in receiving any accolade and seemed more content to remain up North to set things right. The first order of business was to change that damned uniform of the watchdogs back to the Uchiha _mon_ (the fan) instead of Orochimaru's disgusting snake motif. Hell, I'm sure they would have so many renovations to do up there, it could take months (years!) before things went back completely to normal.

So where was Danzo in all of this you might ask?

Who knew?

The coward wasn't at his home especially when the press had gathered around to pester him with questions. Members of the Syndicate and watchdogs had been ordered to be on the lookout for him, and after weeks of searching and questioning of some stubborn loyalists to his cause, Shimura was finally found in an underground hideout deep in the mountains of Sapporo.

Oddly enough, he had taken my advice to heart. It pleased me…and yet left me slightly unsatisfied. I wanted to be the one to kill him, but his pride had been so great, he decided to go out in his own way.

Not only had he committed the traditional act of _seppuku_ – gotta give him props for sticking to his guns at least – he actually had the gall to leave behind a bloodied note with the words:

**I HAVE NO REGRETS.**

_(and fuck you too, asshole)_

We would later come to discover that he had burned/destroyed any and all documents in his possession that could connect him to Ikegami, Orochimaru or any other person he might have dealt with over the years. At least we were lucky those other two didn't have the foresight to do the same thing before they died, which was how and why the public came to know of the real Shimura Danzo.

All's well that ends well, right?

"Shika!" I greeted happily as the door to my hospital room opened to reveal one of the best-looking faces in the world. He managed to give me the middle finger in salutation before maneuvering the crutches, he was leaning on, into the room. Right behind him was his grinning bride-to-be, looking positively radiant even though her man was still stuck in a drab hospital gown and slippers.

"Temari, my love," I crooned in delight and waggled my brows suggestively. "You look absolutely edible."

She laughed as Shika rolled his eyes and attempted to hit me with a crutch. "Good to know you haven't lost your sleazy sense of humor," he retorted good-naturedly as Temari helped him into a chair beside me.

"And I'm glad you're awake at least," she said as she leaned in to place a gentle kiss on my forehead. "Every time we try to visit, they keep telling us that you're asleep or not coherent enough."

"Bah." I pounded the bed with a fist and eyed my surroundings with distaste. I was sick of being cooped up in this stark room, though someone had been nice enough to fill it with flowers (I would later learn they had come from a gamut of different people I least expected – families I had actually helped from the clutches of the Bakufu if you can believe that. It brought tears to my eyes when I thought about it).

"Your face looks less like road-kill," Shika observed and I stuck out my tongue at him.

"Look who's talking. I couldn't tell the difference between your face and a punching bag."

"Fuck off!"

We teased each other for a bit, comparing 'war wounds' and realizing (to my dismay) that Shika was going to be released tomorrow, while I was still going to be kept for a few more tests. I had suffered quite a few broken ribs, while my left cheek and jaw had to undergo surgical repair. However, the doctors seemed surprised I hadn't received more extensive damage to my head considering all the blows and hits I must have received from Danzo's henchmen. I joked that my head was made of steel, but I was still worried all the same. Every now and then I had bouts of amnesia, and though I was reassured that it was commonplace after such trauma, I couldn't shake off the feeling that someday -some horrible, terrible day - I'd wake up not knowing who I was, where I was or who my friends were.

_(or forgetting all about him…)_

That would be the worst of it all I think, and I'm not ashamed to admit that I had sat up one night actually scribbling his name over and over and over again in a small notebook as if hoping to ingrain it within my brain. I kept the notebook under my pillow, and made the decision to make sure I wrote something about him at least once or twice a day. Still, it paled in comparison to the low coil of excitement building within me at the thought of speaking to him again with no fear of being followed or listened in to or being spied upon. I knew he wasn't going to come down here just yet, so I was more than content with a simple telephone call.

_But…when?_

I was sure he, Haku, and Itachi must have heard about what happened by now, but I hadn't even received a note or flowers from them. Okay, fine. I might excuse their behavior since today is the first time in weeks I'm fully alert, so maybe a message came in and one of the nurses failed to deliver it to me. That would explain the 'silence' so far.

While Temari began to peel some oranges for us, Shika fiddled with the remote control of the television until he came the News Channel. In silence, we watched as Gaara (who had apparently come to visit me at the hospital, but I was too conked out at the time to realize it) charmed the pants off the interviewer in his direct and yet quiet manner of speaking. He was discussing plans regarding the legalization of the _yakuza_ and was in talks with the head of the newly formed Senju Syndicate to make sure that all of Ikegami's past transgressions were wiped away as much as possible.

"But don't you think that's nearly impossible?" the interviewer – a stunning brunette with legs any hot-blooded male would love to have wrapped around his waist – asked in her Americanized accent. "The y_akuza's_ tradition over centuries involves the illegal side of affairs…so how do you hope to curb all that in such a short period of time?"

"I am not naïve to believe that the _yakuza_ – as a whole – will suddenly become saints overnight," Gaara replied carefully. "There are still those within the families who insist on remaining with old school principles, and that is understandable. However, one must remember how the _yakuza_ began in the first place. These were men who protected the Japanese people, who fought for their freedoms and sought for justice in a troubled era. Unfortunately, when peace came during the Tokugawa era, these men were no longer needed and were somewhat 'discarded' by society. Most of them became _ronin_ and chose a life of crime and mayhem. Of course there are many _yakuza_ who would deny that and claim that still maintain the original intent of their ancestors and that is what we hope to bring back to the establishment. The _yakuza_ can be a benefit to Japanese society, and it mustn't all be about violence and illegal activities. If the strongest and biggest family of them all – the Senju – can lead the way with this effort, I have no doubt that there will be fewer crimes committed or reported in the news."

"I swear that guy can sell a gun to a baby and convince the kid it's actually candy," I muttered in awe with a slight shake of my head.

"He's a good one," Shika agreed. "Where have you been hiding your brother all this time, sweetheart?"

Temari flushed at the compliment, though she looked at the screen with warmth in her eyes. "He was always the serious one in the family. Never made a lot of friends and was content to remain locked in his room studying from dusk 'til dawn. He was determined to change this country in his own way, and so far he's doing a great job, don't you think?"

"Indeed he is," came the booming voice that had the three of us starting in surprise.

_Jiraiya!_

My heart slammed in my chest at the sight of the big man, and damn if tears didn't want to spring to my eyes, because I was sure I was never going to see that face ever again.

"Now where's my hug?" he teased as he stepped a bit further into the room with arms outstretched. "Or are you too big now to give this old man some kind of love, eh?"

I blushed to the roots of my hair and muttered something about perverted old men before I was promptly engulfed in an embrace that finally broke the little stony reserve I had left. I sobbed silently against his robes; hungrily inhaling that unique scent that was pure Jiraiya and clutching onto him as if afraid he'll vanish from sight in an instant.

"There, there now," he whispered thickly into my hair as he caressed it gently. "Let it all out, Naruto. You deserve this one good cry, son. You deserve it."

I couldn't list all the reasons I was bawling like a baby for, but just know that he was right in saying I needed to do that. With each hitched sob and breath taken, it felt like a little more weight (I hadn't even been aware I was lumbering around with all this time) began to lift off my shoulders. By the time I was through, I was emotionally drained. All cried out as they say and ready to move on. I wiped my face and nose against his clothes, which promptly earned a whine of protest at my snot now decorating his precious garment.

"Hey Kakashi," I greeted with a shy wave as I finally noticed the silent man who must have come in with Jiraiya earlier. He simply nodded and remained in his corner of the room like a sentry.

"Do you need us to leave?" Shika asked hesitantly. "We understand if you need to -"

"Actually, you can stay," Jiraiya insisted as he got off the bed he had been perched on during my cry fest to pull an extra chair closer to the other side of me. "I'm sure he'd want to you stay anyway. This is the first time we finally get to talk to you and there's a lot to cover."

I nodded and braced myself for what was to come, and this was where I learned about everything I mentioned above earlier (with Temari chiming in as well every now and then). By the time they were through, the nurse had come in twice to chase them off, and the third time she wasn't taking "no" for an answer. I needed the rest anyway because my headaches were returning and Jiraiya promised to return tomorrow with some very important visitors. He hoped the nurses would make me look a little more presentable and at least get me to wear proper clothing instead of these pitiful hospital gowns.

The next day, it all made sense on why Jiraiya was insistent that I look 'presentable'. The nurses had complied and I was finally wearing some of my street clothes (just a buttoned-up white shirt and black pants), clean-shaven, hair washed and my breath smelling of mint instead of the usual nasty medicine they keep making me take.

"It couldn't wait. They were determined to see you as soon as possible," he explained as he began to usher in and introduce every head of the different families within the Senju who had come to pay their respects to me.

_Holy…shit…you've got to be kidding me._

Men who looked as intimidating as Ikegami or as wizened as Ōnoki came trickling in one after the other; looking either humbled or contrite at the sight of me. Some presented gifts that Kakashi would set aside, before taking my hands in theirs to either squeeze gently or place a reverent kiss on my fingers. They all pledged their allegiance to the Senju though they were more than aware that I was not going to be the one actually running things. Still, with all my behind-the-scenes influence the past several months, Jiraiya had more than filled them in on just how important I was to this union happening, and they were all going to honor me as their honorary _kumichō_ whether I liked it or not.

I lost count of how many houses I had been invited to or how many ceremonial _sake_ dinners I was to partake of. However, Jiraiya saved my hide again by suggesting that one big ceremony take place as soon as I am healed enough to attend such public functions. Until then, they would leave me alone to recover to a hundred percent. Remembering my manners, I was sure to thank each of them for their kindness and vowed that I would do my best to see that peace and stability was restored (as much as possible) to the different territories, no matter their differences.

In all, the procession of _oyabun_ took up a huge chunk of my day, and by the time Shikamaru and Temari came around to visit – or rather say goodbye – I was alone again, but exhausted. I didn't even get a chance to open my presents as Kakashi and Jiraiya had whisked them away to be kept at 'my house' until I was ready to move in.

"Christ," Shika mumbled in bewilderment. "I thought that parade would never end. You'd think the police would have a field day arresting some of these guys."

I chuckled wearily and slumped back against my pillows. "I guess I never really realized just how far-reaching my influence would be."

"Says the man who went about trying to conquer all of Japan," Shikamaru smirked and then shook his head lightly. There was an expression in his eyes I couldn't quite decipher, but I would later come to see it as a sort of respect, love, and appreciation for me. "You did it though, Naruto. Can you believe it?"

I felt my cheeks flame and shook my head lightly. "I didn't do much…or at least I wouldn't have without you by my side. You know that."

My voice thickened and the tears I thought I had all shed out threatened to come again. I took a deep breath and made myself focus. "So…eh… you two are leaving for good now?"

"Yes," he muttered, his voice as thick and rough as mine. He cleared his throat before continuing. "We need some much needed alone time as you can imagine, but…when we come back, it's for a proper wedding where you're definitely not going to bail out on being my best man, got it?"

I gave him a mock salute. "Aye aye, captain."

He chuckled and swatted my arm playfully, and fell into a pensive silence that Temari took as a sign to leave us alone – though she gave me a warm hug of farewell with a kiss on my lips.

_(you've got yourself a really good woman there, Shika)_

When we were finally by ourselves, Shika reached for my hand to clasp it tightly within his trembling ones. I hardly flinched as he raised them to his lips to repeat the gesture all those other men had done before him. Except that his had more meaning as the silent tears finally came – and for a man who rarely, if at all shed a tear for anything, this was monumental.

"Thank you," he whispered with a sincerity that was torn from the depths of him. "Thank you for everything, Naruto. My story could have ended differently, but…I'm glad…so, so, so damn glad Asuma saw something in you and gave me a chance to see it too. You really are something special. Don't you ever, _ever_ lose it…whatever that 'it' is. Promise me."

_Shika…you…_

I nodded and covered his hand with my free one before raising it to my cheek to hold it there for a moment.

"And thanks to both of you for believing in me from the beginning," I said softly. "You were the first person to see me as human, remember?" I smiled at the memory of the first time we met, earning a tremulous smile from him as well.

"I honestly didn't think too much of you," he confessed. "I thought you were going to be a pain-in-the-ass, and I was right."

I playfully tried to bite his fingers, but he withdrew and pet my leg gently instead. "So…what happens now?" he asked softly. "When you get out of here…?"

He raised a brow with a knowing look in his eyes that made my entire being burn with heat.

"Yeah," I mumbled, as I lowered my gaze and tugged at a loose string on the bed sheet. "I'm going back up there."

"Even though the memories -"

"It's not going to be the same, Shika," I stated softly. "We're all starting anew. Orochimaru's gone and I'm sure those guys have been working their asses off trying to clean up the mess he's created. I want to go there and help -"

"Help? That's all?" came the teasing comment that earned him a playful jab.

"Yeah? So?" I argued back in defiance even though I still couldn't stop blushing. "You're going away with your girl, so it's only fair that I get to see…eh…my…well, him!"

Shikamaru snickered and silenced my sputtering with a firm kiss on my forehead. "I got it. I got it. Fair's fair. I hope you two have a wonderful reunion. You've definitely earned it…just promise you don't lock yourself away in a room for an entire week and forget about 'helping' to restore peace and order and all that crap."

"Shu…shut the fuck up. We're not…!"

"Send us pictures of wonderful Byaku-Shinkyou and its…snow. Brr."

"So you're never going back there?" I asked as he began to hobble his way toward the door. He stopped and took a deep breath before turning around with a small smile.

"Maybe we will…to pay our respects to Asuma's grave, but that's about it. I really have nothing else there to go back to, Naruto. Like you said…everything's starting anew. I have to build my future with Temari, and you've got Sasuke to deal with. Now do us all a favor and get better, so you can get the hell out of this godforsaken hospital, all right?"

"Will do," I replied with a fervent nod. "Don't forget to call me every now and then. Use Jiraiya to get to me until I get a more permanent phone number or something, okay?"

"I will. Take care of yourself, my friend. It's been a real pleasure getting to know you, Uzumaki Naruto."

And with those quiet words, Nara Shikamaru walked away from my life…at least for now. I would miss him dearly; that much was certain, but I could take comfort in knowing that he was finally happy and with the woman he loved more than life itself.

_(and as for you?)_

I snuggled against my pillows and pulled the covers over my head as my words to Shikamaru came back to taunt me in flirtatious whispers within my weary mind.

_I'm going back there… going back to where it all started…_

Where I prayed that this time, Fate would be much kinder to us.


	44. 44: A New Dawn

**Notes:** Whooooo! One more chapter to go, ladies and gentlemen (and maybe an epilogue? I don't know yet). As usual, my sincere thanks go to each and every one who took the time to leave a comment. It really does warm the heart to receive them and shows all the hard work is not for naught. *bows gratefully*

Last but not least, pardon any and all typos you see. It's been one long-ass day with my new job, and boy, I'm glad it came now – as this is ending - because writing might have to take a back seat for a while. : ( There's real life for ya, eh?

Enjoy! And as always, your feedback/comments are much appreciated!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 44<strong>

**A New Dawn**

_For your precious sake,  
>Once my eager life itself<br>Was not dear to me.  
>But now it is my heart's desire<br>It may long, long years endure._

**Fujiwara no Yoshitaka**

* * *

><p><strong>Byaku-Shinkyou<strong>

**Hokkaido Prefecture**

**Two months earlier:**

_Itachi:_

He is far from perfect; even he would tell you that if queried. There are days when he wishes he had a manual specifically catered for 'older brothers', but Life had deemed it fit not to produce such essential literature so far. Life had determined that he'd have to learn that role the hard way, and though it had seemed easy during those early years of innocence, Life had been cruel to him for fourteen long years afterwards. During that time, he played the role of pseudo-big brother to so many others never knowing the fate of the one closest to his heart. It was a role he would loathe to admit he had performed as if walking through a room drenched in darkness. On the outside, he was 'perfect' to admirers. On the inside, however, Life's cruelty continued to take its emotional and mental toll. Only Shisui would ever really know how truly miserable he had been and it was a secret he vowed to carry with him to his grave; should that time come any time soon.

Fortunately, Life (and Fate) had finally decided to give him a break. Ah, yes. They had considered his years of mourning and misery enough penance to finally reunite long lost brothers. It could have been a reunion worthy of fairytales and fantasy novels, but Life (and Fate) – like vengeful lovers not content to simply watch the fruits of their revenge – had none too soon thrust this 'war' upon them.

_(how unfair)_

It was yet another obstacle that could prove to be the final blow struck to a life lived on a wire, where every trembling step he took could be the difference between survival and the afterlife. Sending Sasuke to Byaku-Shinkyou alone was a decision that had kept him up that night; despite his brotherly pep-talk. Every fiber of his being had sent warning signals; screaming that Orochimaru (and his army) would not be so kind and welcoming to Sasuke as he might have tried to reassure them. However, he knew he really had no say in the matter. Sasuke had lived with that man for so long, surely his judgment of Orochimaru's character would be much better than his?

_(trust him…trust that everything will be just fine)_

And yet mere hours after watching his brother and his trusted manservant disappear down the snowcapped trail, he had grit his teeth and made the decision to follow Neji and the others. He would gladly suffer Sasuke's wrath when the time came, but he knew – without a doubt – that he could never live with himself if he simply chose to 'wait' it out despite the many others that needed him at the base.

"I'll stay," were Shisui's words of encouragement as he noticed the determined yet torn expression on his partner's visage. "Go to him. We…I'll be here when you return."

_(thank you, my beloved)_

With that final blessing, he led the young men – who didn't seem too shocked to see him make an appearance – down toward his childhood home for a final confrontation that he hoped would at least give him the opportunity to set things right. Unlike the past, he was no longer that frightened ten-year-old unsure of himself. He would go head-first into battle if need be and protect the last remaining link to a family unfairly taken away from them. Sasuke, at least, deserved that much.

However, with his mind so full of potential plans for attack and what could lie ahead, nothing could prepare him – and the others – for what reality presented. From the deafening explosions to black mushrooms of smoke billowing into the night sky, they could only watch in horror as the large gates leading into the grounds seemed to become the entrance to Hades itself. Bodies tumbled out as if desperate to escape the madness within, and while a lucky few were able to make their escape into the snow-coated landscape, others weren't so lucky. The thick metallic stench of blood and burning flesh filled his nostrils as gunshots rang out to join the cacophony of tortured screams and cries for help. Between rebelling prisoners and loyalist officers to Orochimaru, it was incredibly difficult to make out who was on whose side, but with sharp instructions to his young team to stay on guard, Itachi led them into mayhem with a prayer on his lips.

_(Sasuke…please be all right…please…)_

"Sasori!" he yelled out as he swung at an incoming officer with his _katana_. "Set off the warning flair! We need more back up NOW!"

Sasori nodded curtly and dashed off; his lithe frame almost blending in with the chaos and garnering no extra attention from the fighting taking place. Besides, if anyone dared attack, his super-quick reflexes (only rivaled by Haku he had come to discover) could take them out with prepared poison-tipped needles.

"Lee, Neji and Tenten, you remember the directions on the map leading to Orochimaru's quarters?"

"Yes!" Tenten replied as she sliced off the arm of a prisoner who had lunged for her. "What are you orders, Itachi-sama?"

"Head over there now," Itachi commanded. "Shino, Deidara and I will try to hold them back as much as we can and we'll join you in a bit. Also look for Kiba and the others!"

"Roger!" Lee saluted as he and his companions vaulted over piling dead bodies to dash in the direction assigned to them.

"Deidara! Shino!"

"Yes, sir!" The two men replied, already more than aware of what they had to do. They were vastly outnumbered, but it appeared as if the crowd was beginning to thin…at least those seeking to escape. Now the trio found themselves dealing with Orochimaru loyalists not ready to give up their positions just yet. Behind them the fires raged on; the thick smell of smoke and gasoline polluting the air and making it a little difficult to breathe.

Itachi shrugged off the now bloodied robe he had been wearing to brace himself for the fight ahead. He could vaguely recognize the face of the leader of the band of loyalists, but besides that, the others were new to him. These were all men from different walks of life, who had come here with one goal in mind; to protect and serve…allegedly.

_(now it's more like to purify the earth from sinners, eh?)_

Itachi smirked coldly and lifted his _katana_ as the officers began to dash forward to attack.

_(I'll see you all in Hell)_

It would take him nearly half-an-hour to finally make it toward the much quieter section of the grounds – Orochimaru's quarters to be exact – but by this time, the earlier snow flurries had now become a steady sheet of snow that was beginning to make visibility poor. Sasori, Deidara and Shino – along with rebel officers led by someone named Fuu – were finishing up the last of the loyalists. Several had given up and volunteered to be captured, but Itachi knew that this was only the tip of the iceberg. Who knew what else was happening deeper within the grounds?

_(all the dead bodies to clear away…goddamnit! What a mess!)_

However, his top priority was finding out if Sasuke was all right…

_(still alive)_

…but his running/stumbling steps slowed when he noticed the small group huddled at the bottom of the steps. He felt his adrenaline – which was already shot sky high from the fights – nearly send his heart erupting from his chest as he imagined Sasuke being among the dead bodies. Noticing Tenten's familiar hairstyle, he quickened his steps again until he came to a stop before her.

_(Oh my…God)_

"Haku!" he cried out as his frantic gaze settled on the person cradled within her arms. He stooped to his haunches to eye the extremely pale features; his fear growing tenfold as he noticed how dark and drenched –

_(the blood loss!) _

…the lower half of Haku's body was.

"He's still breathing, but barely," Tenten was saying as Itachi reached out to caress the face tenderly; a hard lump forming in his throat. How on earth would Sasuke deal with this? Losing Haku was going to be akin to losing a younger brother at this stage in his life.

"Kimimaro stabbed his lower back," Tenten explained. "This officer saw everything."

The officer in question was Tsubasa, who had trailed after Haku and Sasuke on their quest to find Orochimaru. He nodded as he met Itachi's querying gaze; trying not to look too in awe at finally seeing the 'missing' Uchiha brother and remorse for not being able to do more.

"They were in a fight," Tsubasa began. "Sasuke-sama defeated Ukon." He pointed to a body on the right that was already half-buried in the snow. "And Haku-sama defeated Sakon." He pointed to another body further away. "However, it was Kimimaro-sama who shot them and then went for Haku-san. He gave Sasuke-sama permission to fight Orochimaru with no interruptions." This time he pointed behind him and into what looked like a dark corridor that was barely lit. "Haku and Kimimaro-sama got into a fight themselves, but it seemed more like a discussion they had. I –"

His words faltered as they heard shuffling noises coming from said dark corridor. On instinct, they all stiffened in awareness; Tenten cradling Haku protectively against her body while reaching for one of her _wakizashi_. Fuu stood protectively in front of Itachi as he rose slowly to his feet with _katana_ at the ready for an ambush. The seconds seemed to tick on forever, and just when Itachi felt he'd go mad with anticipation, their 'attackers' turned out to be –

"God help me," he breathed as his heart twisted with pain and yet relief at the sight of the three men he had sent into the lion's den all those months ago. To see their bloodied and beaten bodies barely able to hang on (for Kiba and Suigetsu were doing their best to hold up a Jūgo that couldn't even move on his own) – and Tenten's low cry of alarm was more than enough – Itachi lunged just in time to catch the falling trio.

"Ita…Itachi-sama?" Kiba croaked; his visible eye welling with emotion at the sight of the man they had suffered through all this for. "We…Jūgo -"

"Don't say anything," Itachi ordered kindly, while squeezing Kiba's shoulder gently. "I'm proud of you…all of you…" This time he directed his gaze to Suigetsu, who had slumped to the ground in exhaustion.

"Wan…wanted to ki…kick his ass…" Suigetsu panted with a wry smile that looked more like a grimace on his battered features. "You…your brother," he explained with a glance at Itachi. "He…he…rescued us…the bas…bastard…but…you better go in there…that Orochimaru guy's…nuts."

Itachi nodded in understanding. "The priority is to get you all better. Tenten and this officer here will get you to safety -"

"…not…me…"

Jūgo's barely audible words had everyone glancing at him in surprise. His eyes weren't open, and they couldn't even if they wanted to. Whoever tortured them had seemed to inflict the most damage on the big guy. His once open and kindly features were no longer recognizable; even that familiar shock of orange hair now looked like a grotesque congealed maroon mixture. A trembling hand was raised as high as it could go – which wasn't that much – but Itachi knelt beside him and clutched the hand tightly to his chest anyway.

"Hang in there, Jūgo," he whispered firmly. "Sasori and the others will be here to take care of your wounds until we can get you to the hospi -"

"No…" came the harsh but urgent word as Jūgo shook his head slowly. "Can't…don't bother -"

"What are you talking about?" Suigetsu snapped as he tried to sit up. His tone was angry and yet it trembled as he realized what the big guy was planning on doing. "You're not quitting on us now. You'll get better -"

Jūgo's lips curved into a tiny smile as a tear escaped the corner of his eye. "Thank…you…Suigetsu -"

"What are you thanking me for, you big…urgh! Fuck this!" His breath caught and he forced himself to stand up and stagger away before collapsing onto the snow with a growl of frustration. "Goddamnit!"

"Kiba…" Jūgo continued; his voice fainter still, and Kiba – who had turned away initially, finally forced himself to look at the kindest yet bravest man he had ever met. It was Jūgo who had taken most of the punishment. Jūgo who had gone out of his way to try to fight Orochimaru head on until Kimimaro had stepped in. Jūgo who had smiled at his friends and tried to reassure them that everything was going to be just fine; that they would survive and get out of this place no matter what. It was Jūgo who had allowed Kimimaro to take out his frustrations on him and Kiba could have sworn that the white-haired man had been crying with every blow, lash or strike inflicted upon the bigger man. It was finally Kiba who had to beg that they stop or Jūgo really would have died there and then.

"…take care…of…Aka…Akamaru…" Jūgo whispered as the hand within Itachi's grasp began to grow weak. "You…thank you…Itachi…sama…"

Itachi gritted his teeth; not trusting himself to speak. He could still remember the day he had posed the question to the group of young men in that stuffy underground meeting room and how Jūgo had been the first to raise his hand to offer himself –

_(a sacrifice)_

This was so unfair!

Jūgo's breath shuddered as he struggled to speak. He must have sensed the internal conflict Itachi was going through, for he managed one weak squeeze of the older man's hand as if to reassure him. "Don't be…sad…Itachi-sama," he rasped. "…I…pro…promised…Kim…Kimimaro…waiting…for…me…he…is …waiting…thank you…for letting me see him…one last time…thank you…"

And with that lone tear trailing down his cheek - and what looked like the semblance of a peaceful smile on his visage – the 'gentle giant' Jūgo took his last breath; leaving behind a group of people whose lives he had touched in some way. The sudden low hoot would have them all looking up to notice Jūgo's graceful snow owl circle around them for a moment – perhaps paying its final respects to one of the rare humans who could understand their language - before becoming one with the snow as it eventually flew into the heavens never to be seen again.

Itachi leaned closer to place a gentle kiss on Jūgo's forehead, squeezed the large but capable hand one last time before positioning both upon the broad chest.

_(farewell…and may you finally find your happiness with him in the afterlife. Goodness knows you deserve it)_

He rose to his feet and looked toward the dark corridor for a long minute before barking out curtly,

"Tenten."

"Ye…yes," came the sobbed reply.

"Dry your eyes," Itachi said without looking at her. "We have a lot of work to do. When Sasori arrives -"

"I'm here," came the quiet words, which elicited a few gasps of surprise as no one had even heard the red-haired man arrive. How long he had been here watching the proceedings was anyone's guess. No wonder his recon skills were second to none.

"Good," Itachi said with a small smile. "See to it that their wounds are treated, especially Haku's. I'll return shortly to get an update on what's happening around the grounds."

And hardly waiting for anyone to respond to his decision, he dashed toward the darkness; the weight of Jūgo's death and the fear of what was to become of his brother now a terrible burden upon his shoulders.

* * *

><p><em>Present Day:<em>

He looked up as a shadow fell over him, but only to find his lips captured in a brief but hard kiss that brought a reluctant but weary smile to his face.

"Still working?" Shisui asked as he pulled away to eye the paperwork spread across the low desk in Itachi's 'office'. The term was used loosely as it was still undergoing construction (as most of the grounds were actually) and Itachi had needed a place to get some work done, so this unfinished room would have to do for now.

Itachi dropped the quill and rubbed his eyes with the heel of his hands. It was almost two in the morning and Byaku-Shinkyou at this hour was both at its most peaceful and yet haunting. Perhaps haunting would be a better word considering the events that had taken place since that night.

"It never seems to end," he finally muttered as he lowered his hands to study them as if seeing them for the first time. He looked up to notice his partner watching him thoughtfully from his position by the doorway. Shisui – dressed in a _yukata _– looked considerably less tense than he had been in the past few months. It was as if the 'conquering' of Orochimaru had finally given him cause to see the world as a whole lot more than a battlefield. He was throwing himself into the restoration of Byaku-Shinkyou with everything he had, and while Itachi was forced to become the public face of the 'new and improved' Uchiha clan to the rest of the world, he and Sasuke had been content to remain in the background.

Speaking of which…

"Did you see him today?" Shisui asked quietly.

Itachi shook his head with a wry smile. "He's so busy going through Orochimaru's underground den …I'm a little worried."

"You think he'll become influenced by what he sees there?"

Itachi bit his lower lip in thought. How could he explain to Shisui just what he had witnessed that night when he finally arrived in Orochimaru's private quarters? After the initial shock of seeing Orochimaru's head sitting upon the gaudy golden 'throne' and the body swimming in a pool of its own blood, his panicked gaze had drifted over Lee and Neji – hardly hearing whatever they were saying – as fear seemed to claw at his heart with ravenous greed. He finally noticed Sasuke seeming to haunch within himself in a corner of the room; a sound – a cross between laughter, sobbing and moaning – escaping his lips.

"I wouldn't go to close to him," Neji seemed to be saying as Itachi began walking toward his brother. "He nearly took our heads off -"

He simply held a hand up to silence Neji's concerns, more than aware of Sasuke's current state of mind. He wouldn't pretend to know exactly what his brother was thinking, but the moment he dared to reach out to touch Sasuke's head gently, Itachi nearly got a taste of what Neji was talking about.

Itachi barely saw him move and yet if he had remained standing there, the blade would have slashed right through his neck. However, his quick reflexes had him weaving away yet reaching out to grasp Sasuke's wrist tightly. Sasuke snarled; dark eyes wide, unseeing and filled with an expression that could only be considered as pure insanity.

"Itachi-sama!" Lee cried out; ready to defend his mentor, but Itachi bellowed back as he sensed the other men coming closer.

"Leave us!"

"But Itachi-sama...!"

"Go NOW," he ordered firmly. "The others need you. I'll be fine. Don't wor…shit!" For as he was saying this, he had to dodge the kick that was aimed at his torso. He cursed and countered with a hard blow to Sasuke's side, wincing at the grunt this elicited from a man who was obviously still in pain from whatever fights he had engaged in. However, it was more than enough for Itachi, for when Sasuke tried to lunge for him again, he twisted the wrist he had been gripping; forcing the _katana_ to drop to the floor with a loud clatter.

Once he was sure Lee and Neji had left the room, Itachi increased the pressure on Sasuke's wrist; intensely watching those dark eyes to see if anything was getting through.

_(come back to me, Sasuke)_

The younger brother lunged again, this time using his free hand to try to deliver a blow, but Itachi was too quick. He weaved away, lashing out at the offending arm with a swiftly delivered kick that had Sasuke groaning in pain before sinking to his knees in a sudden show of resignation. He lowered his head before shaking it slowly back and forth as if trying to get rid of something.

"…Sasuke?" Itachi called out softly. "Can you hear me?"

There was no answer for a long minute, and just when Itachi was about to contemplate slapping some sense into him again, Sasuke finally lifted his head to reveal an expression that sent a sharp pang of an emotion so strong; Itachi was sure there had to be something beyond the mere 'love' one ought to have for another. He had never seen his brother look so frightened and vulnerable, and at the barely audible –

".._niisan_?"

…that was whispered, Itachi fell to his knees to engulf Sasuke in a hug that muffled the harsh sobs that now seemed wrenched from Sasuke's throat. These were the real tears he had stored up for so long, and Itachi was more than willing to let them fall.

"It's all over," he whispered into the thick dark hair as he too felt the first trickle of tears burn his eyes. After fourteen long and trying years…

"It's finally over, Sasuke."

* * *

><p>At least that part of things were, for there was so much more to deal with when they finally came back to the 'real world' (so to speak).<p>

The reinforcements had finally arrived, and along with the anti-Orochimaru watchdogs, they had set about going deeper into the grounds to rescue trapped prisoners, capture Orochimaru loyalists and most importantly put out the fires. By morning (and with some help from the overnight snowfall), most of the fires had been extinguished, but the damage was quite extensive. Ninety-percent of the officers' mess was destroyed – for the fire had started there – and it had spread to most of the residential/prisoners' quarters. This forced Itachi (as per Sasuke's suggestion) to make the unfortunate decision of sending those prisoners who had either been too sick or terrified to escape, to take up residence within the caves making up the West Block.

As for the East Block – the torture section – that had been ravaged by rebellious prisoners. The carnage and destruction in there was worrisome for there was now the likelihood that the escaped felons were now out and about on the streets. None of the officers in charge of E-Block had survived the massacre and most of the paperwork in Officer Fudo's office was nothing now nothing more than ashes. Speaking of Fudo, he and a few other officers had been dragged down to the chamber where Naruto (and so many others) had been tortured and were delivered some of the worst treatment possible. As for the Torture Master himself…let's just say Naruto might have patted the prisoners on the back for a job well done. The fat bastard definitely wouldn't be missed.

Next was the painful and arduous task of finding and piling all the dead bodies. The final count when all had been gathered? A hundred and sixty-five prisoners and forty officers dead; either murdered or victims of the fire.

To make matters worse, the events that had taken place were slowly being leaked to the press. With the announcement of the death of Orochimaru finally making its way to the Tarumae mountains - where the battle was still taking place between his army and Akatsuki – and the presence of the troops the three remaining _daimyos_ had sent as reinforcement, they finally raised the white flag in surrender; sparing more unnecessary lives lost. With the press now salivating at the chance for some kind of news about the 'mystery' Uchiha brothers returning from the dead, Itachi, Shisui and Sasuke had done the best they could to make Byaku-Shinkyou as presentable as possible. A challenge to say the least.

Most of the villagers straggled in to help with the cleanup, focusing on washing away blood stains, clearing debris and of course burying the bodies in a make-shift graveyard amongst the mountains. Sasuke gave the order to barricade Orochimaru's quarters; preventing anyone from going there until he made up his mind on what to do with it. And as for Orochimaru's body? Surprisingly, Sasuke had requested it be cremated and his ashes sent to the mountains at Usu. There was no pomp and circumstance surrounding this event, and it seemed almost pitiful that a man so full of delusion and grandeur would end up as nothing more than ashes in a simple clay jar.

Unfortunately, all of this seemed to pale in comparison when they finally discovered Orochimaru's underground lairs; rooms he had carved within the caves to harbor his special labs and libraries. From Sasuke's expression, it was clear he had no idea such places existed and as the brothers (and Shisui) explored for endless hours, they were given an insight into just how tormented and demented Orochimaru had become especially in the latter years. Sasuke had revealed the serum Orochimaru had used on his eyes and the men had discovered seemingly hundreds of jars with the clear fluid stored within makeshift shelves.

"At least he left us with a gift," Shisui had deduced wryly. "We can thank him for that."

However, that was as far as their gratitude went, for other jars and clear display cases contained items that made them nauseous and sick to their stomach. Ranging from eyeballs to unborn fetuses floating in formaldehyde, Orochimaru had spared no expense to see that his research went beyond normal standard practices. As if that wasn't bad enough, they also discovered the room where he performed his blood transfusions. Looking like something out of a horror-sci-fi themed movie; the claustrophobic space was riddled with so many tubes, IV lines, machines to monitor one's heart rate, and breathing apparatuses – all connected to large containers still filled with fresh blood. Knowing that countless members of their clan had been his guinea pigs (the sick bastard even had a freezer storage unit for bodies for crying out loud!) had sent Shisui smashing the equipment with a rage that did not take either brother by surprise.

They would eventually take the bottles of serum above ground, with the hope that more of the Uchiha who had remained hidden in the shadows, would finally come forward to receive the medication. Thankfully, the clinic within the grounds had been spared from most of the fire and Kabuto - who had survived the riot only because he had been in Tokyo during that time – had the unenviable task of learning how to administer the drug as well as taking care of the many victims still suffering from the effects of that night. To say he was flabbergasted at what had taken place, would be an understatement. He had considered quitting - for his loyalties still lay with his mentor, Orochimaru - however, Sasuke's none-too-subtle-threat of killing him if he dared leave, had sent the bespectacled man back to his role as reluctant caregiver. Goodness knew he might not have kept his promise, but with Karin and Hinata volunteering to be his assistants, Kabuto knew he had to be on his best behavior before the watchful eyes of the astute females.

With their excellent medical skills, Kiba and Suigetsu were back to a semblance of their former selves, though Kiba had requested he take some time off to go back to home. Suigetsu, who had no one waiting for him outside the walls of Byaku-Shinkyou, made the decision to remain within the grounds and to assist with the reconstruction. If he was still hell bent on fighting Sasuke to make up for his brother's demise, he gave no inclination of it – at least for now. The same went for the other members of Akatsuki, who all offered to remain within or around town to help as much as they could. And though Itachi had insisted that they were no longer bound to remain within the group and were free to go their separate ways now that the war was over, no one would hear of it. Itachi had led them through the darkest points of their lives and now they would be there for him whether he liked it or not.

Such loyalty was enough to make anyone emotional, and Itachi – though keeping a straight face throughout the meeting – finally cracked the façade in the quiet of his room later that night. Sometimes he felt he didn't deserve such 'hero' worship, but he considered himself lucky to have met such a great group of young men and women he could rely on.

With all of this going on, Itachi had to pinch himself to realize just how fast time seemed to go by. It was almost two months since their arrival here; and though he couldn't say it felt like 'home' completely – for he was more than aware of Orochimaru's presence in most places – he felt he could get used to it eventually…

_(almost)_

Their childhood home – which was Sasuke's residence all these years – had been spared for the fires. Itachi had wandered around the familiar, yet unfamiliar rooms in quiet contemplation as memories came flooding back with every gentle caress of a shoji screen door or a piece of furniture. His bedroom (as well as his parents') was still the way it had been when he 'left' all those years ago. Sasuke had confessed he hadn't been able to go into those rooms since the ambush, neither would he allow anyone to do any sort of housekeeping. And so they had remained; ghostly reminders filled with layers of dust and the yellowed smell of frozen time.

_(how much pain you must have lived with, Sasuke. I couldn't even begin to imagine…)_

"He'll be fine," Shisui's words came drifting into his thoughts, forcing Itachi to pay attention to his partner, who allowed a warm smile to come to his visage. "You forget he's no longer that baby kid brother you used to dream about. He's what…? Twenty? He's practically ready to get married and start his own family."

Itachi chuckled weakly. "That's going to be a bit of a problem, isn't it? With he and I not particularly interested in women…at least he isn't at this time…I have a sinking feeling we might be the last line of defense for this branch of the Uchiha family tree."

Shisui smirked. "Ever heard of surrogate mothers, my dear? All you need do is find a woman willing to carry your…_our_ seed for a few months and _viola_. You've got an offspring to expand the family tree for a few more generations."

"A woman, huh?" Itachi raised a brow with a teasing smile. "You know ever since that interview I gave to the media, I've gotten quite a few candidates knocking at my…argh!"

He couldn't help laughing as Shisui tackled him to the floor –

_(damn his lover's speed)_

…only to be silenced as those warm and tender lips claimed his again in a kiss that left him breathless and aching for more. He sighed and wrapped his arms around Shisui's neck, mounds of paperwork forgotten as he stared into dark eyes that burned for him and only him. It was wonderful to have someone he could share his innermost thoughts, fears and dreams with. However, he couldn't help feeling a slight pang of guilt at being able to enjoy this moment while Sasuke…

_(waits)_

…appeared to be too burdened with his new responsibilities and no time to really think about the one he most wanted to be with. If Itachi could fly down to Tokyo, this very minute, to bring Naruto back to Byaku-Shinkyou, he'd have gladly done so. However, Jiraiya's words of 'allowing Naruto to fully heal and deal with some unfinished affairs' had forced Itachi to back away from that plan.

_(and knowing Sasuke…no matter how long it takes, he'll wait)_

"I love you," Itachi finally whispered as their foreheads met and their breaths mingled to become one. "You know that, don't you?"

"Prove it to me then," Shisui invited huskily as his lips began to trail down Itachi's arched neck while a hand slid beneath the _yukata_ to caress the trembling flesh beneath. "Prove it to me now until our dying breath, my love."

_Until our dying breath,_ Itachi thought with an ache in his heart as he closed his eyes and gave himself up to inevitable exquisite pleasure. _Ah, Shisui…my beloved…I'm yours…always…_

* * *

><p><em>Haku:<em>

Twice.

Twice now he had come face-to-face with Death. Twice he had found himself standing at its doorstep, staring into the darkness that was likely to consume him, and twice now a hand had reached into that darkness to yank him back into the light.

There were days he still wondered if he deserved it; if Life was somehow trying to tell him something.

_(it is not yet your time…endure…just a little bit longer)_

He sighed and wrapped the cloak a little tighter around his body; his steps slow and steady within the inch of snow that had fallen the night before. It was only mid-October and Mother Nature had deemed it fit to send Winter's Wrath upon them earlier than it normally would. Still, as he approached the crest of the mountain, he was again reminded of why he would forever love this place despite the pain and heartache it brought him.

From his vantage point, Byaku-Shinkyou looked splendid beneath the cold mid-morning sun. Though parts of it were still in shambles and signs of re-building were taking place, nothing could take away the majestic setting and the breathlessness one experienced when taking in the overall geography. Haku made a mental note to request that his body – when his time eventually came – be placed somewhere here, so he could always look out to this scene in the afterlife.

For now though, he had to pay his respects to the one who had almost sent him there in the first place.

He withdrew the small bouquet of flowers from within his robe as he approached the two unmarked graves in which Kimimaro and Jūgo had been buried side-by-side. Haku – and with some effort – stooped to his haunches to place the flowers on the gravestones, before rising to his feet with a wince of pain as he lower back protested the movement.

(_you were lucky,_ the doctor had said, _whoever stabbed you avoided hitting the vital nerves in your spine or you would have ended up being paralyzed from the waist down_)

He shuddered and embraced himself tightly.

_(why let me live, Kimimaro-sama? When you had the opportunity to finish me off there and then?) _

How many sleepless nights had he replayed that moment – when the blade pierced through his flesh – over and over again within his troubled mind? How many times could he hear the anguish in those whispered words of final atonement, and how many times had Haku wondered if he could have done so much more to rescue Kimimaro from his inevitable Fate. In hindsight, what could he have possibly done? And would Kimimaro have listened anyway?

He would later come to learn that the one named Jūgo had tried to be the reasonable voice in Kimimaro's tumultuous existence; that Jūgo had risked his life daring to challenge his childhood friend to turn away from Orochimaru's chokehold over him, and what had he received for all his valiant efforts? Nothing but an unmarked grave and the naive hope that at least both tortured men were finally together in Heaven (or Hell). It was Suigetsu who had gone out of his way to request that Jūgo be buried next to Kimimaro while Haku had pleaded with Sasuke to let Kimimaro's few remains be buried instead of discarded like trash. And though his (ex)master had not attended the small funeral held for both men, Itachi's presence more than made up for it even if he really hadn't been there to pay respects to Kimimaro per se.

_(one chapter closed…)_

With his legs beginning to get tired (just one of the after effects of the stabbing), he sat upon a boulder beneath a stark tree whose limbs bowed with the weight of snow accumulated upon it – to catch his breath. He closed his eyes and tried to piece together the events of the last two months as best he could.

He had woken up in a hospital in Sapporo, where a very relieved Sasuke had been keeping watch over him during the two days he was passed out. He would later be regaled of Sasuke's success in defeating Orochimaru, though he was yet to bring up that topic with his (ex) master in the few discussions they had had so far. Besides, Sasuke was so busy these days, Haku was lucky if he even got a chance to see his (ex)master for more than an hour at a time. He hated to admit that a part of him still felt guilty at not being 'there' for Sasuke during his confrontation with Orochimaru, for that promise he had made to never leave his master's side, no matter what – tore at him. So yes, Sasuke had tried to reassure him that there was nothing he could have done anyway, but Haku had still felt useless and disappointed. Those feelings were made even worse with his current situation. He knew he was now no longer as quick as he used to be, and goodness knew how long it would take until his wounds were finally healed. Sasuke didn't complain when Haku set about doing little errands for him here and there, but at the same time, he was more than aware that Sasuke was capable of handling so many more things on his own without his help.

_(what good am I to him now? What happens to me from now on? Where do I go from here?)_

How he wished Naruto-kun would return and perhaps help to ease the tension building between them. He had heard of Naruto's success in taking down Ikegami and Danzo (indirectly); news that did more to excite him at the prospect of seeing the vivacious blond again. It had been a long (almost) seven months since he last saw Naruto, and visions of how their reunion would be –

_(if it ever happened)_

…had consumed some of his thoughts. What would Naruto look like now? Would his encounter with the _yakuza_ have changed him? Would he become more cynical with his outlook on life? Or had he managed to retain that humanity that had endeared Haku to him in the first place? As for his 'other' feelings for Naruto…well…

_(fondness)_

…Haku wasn't quite sure anymore. He knew he did care for the blond and like Sasuke, would do anything requested of him, so what did it all mean? Was he finally ready to let go of Naruto emotionally? Was that part of him now ready to admit that he could and would _never_ be the one for Naruto; that the dark-haired man who seemed more content to bury himself with work these days – was the one truly meant for him?

_(if that's the case…)_

"So this is where you've been hiding. Should have guessed," came the softly-spoken words, which had Haku sitting up with a gasp of surprise. He kicked himself inwardly at his absentmindedness; knowing that the old him would have been more alert at the presence of someone else in the vicinity. However, seeing the familiar face approach eased the hard thumping within his chest, and he broke into a shy smile of welcome.

"Sasori-sama. What are you doing here?"

Sasori, who was dressed in a similar dark robe, reached into it to withdraw the small vial hidden within. "You missed taking your meds this morning," he chided gently. "I came in to check up on you, and you were gone…bottle untouched." He frowned, though his eyes were still filled with a warmth that sent a flush of color to Haku's cheeks. "Don't make me force feed it to you."

"Sorry," Haku muttered and accepted the bitter-tasting liquid. He swallowed with a grimace, only to sigh in gratitude as something much sweeter (water actually) was immediately placed against his lips. He drank like a man deprived; his blush darkening as he caught the intense gaze trained on him by the older man. [Which was hard to believe in itself as Sasori looked as if he was barely older than Haku]

"Than…thank you," he gasped when he was almost through finishing the contents of the flask. "I needed that."

Sasori gave a non-committal grunt and tucked away both objects before turning to face the graves Haku had paid homage to earlier. Neither man said anything for a long time, but that was okay. Haku was used to Sasori's silences by this time. From the moment Sasori had decided to take charge of his training, Haku had come to learn of the older man's nuances and quirks. Sasori was not much of a talker, but when he did speak, he always had something of importance to say. He seemed to enjoy art – something he had in common with Deidara as both men would sometimes get into heated arguments over whose artistic merit was better – and had tried to get Haku to appreciate the craft. On one occasion, he had taken Haku to an art exhibit – something Haku hadn't been able to tell Sasuke at the time for fear it might be taken the wrong way. He wouldn't call it a date, as Sasori hadn't made any attempts to become intimate, but Haku had learned more about Sasori's life and how he had ended up joining Akatsuki. [His parents had been murdered by Orochimaru's minions because of Sasori's father's position in the military at the time]

For his part, Haku had been more reserved; the memories of Sai's betrayal still fresh in his mind as he resisted the urge to be as forthcoming as he could have been. He had worried that his evasiveness would upset Sasori, but if anything, the older man seemed more content to attend to him rather than pester for personal information that was none of his business.

That attention had been more obvious with his most recent injury. It was Sasori who had taken him to Sapporo and had been by his bedside before Sasuke arrived. It was Sasori who traveled back with him to Byaku-Shinkyou and who had gone out of his way to become his 'nurse' and 'physical therapist'. It was almost embarrassing to have someone else wait hand and foot on him, but Haku had slowly come to appreciate the other man's presence especially during those times when Sasuke didn't need him for anything. The idea of returning to his quiet room and being all alone was shattered at the sight of the red-head reading or practicing some of his calligraphy. He wouldn't leave until Haku was fast asleep, and he was first face seen when Haku awakened in the morning.

Even Deidara had begun to tease that Sasori had the 'hots' for Haku and just didn't know how to say it. For his taunting, Sasori had delivered the mother of all punches to the blond's face with a snarl to 'shut his goddamn mouth' before stomping off red-faced at the insinuation that he could be lovesick.

"I was thinking," Sasori finally said aloud, even though he wasn't looking at Haku as he spoke. Haku glanced at him with a raised brow; for he had noticed a slight tremble in the older man's voice. Sasori cleared his throat and spoke again; this time in a much firmer tone. "I have been doing some thinking, Haku…and I think it's best we leave this place for a while."

_Huh? _

Haku blinked in bemusement. "What do you mean, Sasori-sama?"

Sasori seemed to sigh, ran fingers through his hair before finally turning around. His expression gave nothing away, but there was something in those eyes that had the younger man's heart skipping a beat.

"I know you have your loyalties to Sasuke, but…you need sometime away to completely heal from your injuries and…uh…"

Was it his imagination or were Sasori's cheeks turning pink?

"…I think it's best we go to a place where it's peaceful and less chaotic… for you to get some proper rest that is."

"But it's peaceful here," Haku explained with a wave of his hand toward the serene surroundings. "I love it here."

"Up here it's serene," Sasori agreed with a nod, "but I'm not talking about living in the goddamn mountains, Haku. Down there…it's still a mess, and I hate knowing you'll be going about trying to please Sasuke who's got his hands full at the moment and no time for you."

Haku winced, but knew – oh how he knew – how right Sasori was.

There was a heavy sigh and Sasori spoke again, this time in a much gentler tone. "I don't mean to say that he doesn't appreciate you being there for him, but the reality is…you cannot be his manservant forever, and I'm sure he's probably told you that already. You've got to set off on your path, Haku. There's so much more out there for you to explore and…I want to help you discover your potential…if you'll let me."

The last few words were almost lost in a mumble, but Haku had heard all the same. He wanted to deny Sasori's reasoning; to argue that Sasuke _did_ need him and would continue to need him for as long as he lived. However, a sad glance at Kimimaro's grave was a painful reminder of where his thoughts were leading him. Perhaps Kimimaro had once felt the same way; that his life belonged with Orochimaru and nothing else out there would be good enough. Was he bound to become as 'blind' as Kimimaro if he chose to continue to latch on to Sasuke? Would it eventually become too little too late when he realized that he had missed his opportunity 'out there' simply because he chose to remain beside a man whose need for him was no longer precedent?

He closed his eyes and could almost – _almost_ - hear a voice whisper softly into his ear -

_(do not make the same mistakes I did)_

He lifted his lashes to meet the deep-set brown ones still staring at him with an unspoken question (plea) within them.

_Dare I take the plunge? If I say yes…_

"Haku?" Sasori called out gently, and in a gesture he had never done in all their time together, he moved closer still until his warm hand cupped Haku's cheek tenderly. "Will you come with me?"

"Sasori-sama…"

"I know you're afraid," Sasori interrupted quietly as he pressed his lips against Haku's forehead. "I know what it's like to leave the comfort of one you are so familiar with and to dare go outside the box, but I promise to be here for you for as long as you need me. Will you let someone else…_me_…take care of you for once?" He pulled away a little to smile almost shyly at the younger man. "Consider me your servant if you want."

Haku's cheeks blossomed with a warmth that had his heart fluttering with hope (and still that fear of the unknown). His eyes burned with tears that finally broke free to roll down his cheeks, and as he buried his heated features against the chest of the older man, all he could think about was how he was going to break the news to Sasuke-sama.

_(one chapter closed…and a new one has to begin)_

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke:<em>

Two hundred _trained_ officers – not including the Orochimaru loyalists still held in captivity. If I include them, we will have a grand total of only two hundred and twenty-five officers; well short of the staggering number Orochimaru had kept during his reign. Of course there were several reasons for the shortage:

Many had defected during the last Gudan and, of course, the most recent riot.

Some had lost their lives in said riot.

Some had decided to turn in their badges and weapons; spilling some shit about not being worthy enough to wear the Uchiha _mon_.

Luckily, Kurobachi – who had survived the battle at the mountains – had vowed to begin training some of the Akatsuki members who had fought with him up there. He had at least a hundred men to work with, and he promised to whip them into watchdog form in about a month.

_(works for me…)_

I assigned him to become Captain of the First Squad – my former position. That was the easy part. The problem now was finding even more qualified officers to be in charge of the new squads I had to form. I stared at the list of names before me until my vision blurred (this had nothing to do with any side effects from Orochimaru's 'magic' serum which I hated to admit had really improved my vision considerably). Simply put, I was fucking tired. I had lost all sense of time as I've been stuck in my office trying to re-create some semblance of organization in a broken system. Itachi has been dealing with the financial side of things; for rebuilding and hosting a conference of all the watchdog commissioners from across the country – was not going to be a cheap undertaking. We had scoured through Orochimaru's journals to discover where he might have hidden funds, but there was no secret room filled with crates of gold and fine jewelry or even money. The most we found was a big brown envelope delivered by the - now deceased - _daimyō_ containing over a million yen.

"He must have a secret bank account or something," Shisui had deduced with barely concealed frustration. "You can't tell me that all these years, he wouldn't have money stashed away somewhere. And what about your family's inheritance? Your father's Will? Have you guys tried finding where that is?"

Where indeed. I couldn't remember Orochimaru ever disclosing that to me, and why would he? For all I knew, he might have burned the entire thing to the ground after discovering them.

"I'll look up some of my father's old friends," Itachi decided. "I'm not sure if any of them are lawyers, but it should be easy to find one or two willing to help us."

[Let it be known – for the record – that Orochimaru's foreign accounts were eventually frozen since he was considered a criminal, hence our inability to access them. Of course this unfortunate revelation would come much later.]

With a heavy sigh, I tapped my pen on the journal, restlessly; my lips pursed in thought.

_Hyūga Neji…he could make a fine captain. _

Why? I believe I've already mentioned some of the qualities I noticed in him from the moment we met. In addition, he (and his sister) had chosen to remain in Byaku-Shinkyou to assist, and I had seen how competent he was in organizing the few prisoners left as well as delegating officers to watch over them in specified shifts. I didn't know if Itachi had ordered him to do so, but it was a job that was greatly appreciated on my end. In fact, I had come to realize just how grateful I was for everyone's input in making the transition – though difficult – as smoothly as possible. Trying to imagine myself being all alone and having to deal with all of this…

_(no way in Hell)_

…it was just too much to even contemplate.

As I was just about to begin assigning officers to Neji's capable hands (and I briefly contemplated that Kiba character as a possible candidate), a light cough had me looking up with a light frown at the interruption. My immediate and conditioned reaction was to insult Asuma for bothering me, but just as quickly as that thought had come; it vanished with a dull pang of sadness. That's right. Asuma was no longer here. I would never get to see that smiling (or frowning) goateed face ever again. All the same, I relaxed as I saw who it was and even managed a weary smile.

"Hey."

"Hey, yourself," Itachi greeted with a two fingered salute and a quirk of his lips. "Want to take a walk with me?"

I glanced at the clock on the wall and raised a brow. "It's almost three in the morning. Itachi."

"All the more reason why we ought to take this walk. I've got something very interesting to show you."

_Oh God. Please don't let it be yet another discovered hidden laboratory filled with dead children or filleted carcasses. I don't think I can deal with anymore of that shit right now._

It had taken me weeks to finally stop having nightmares of our earlier discoveries – especially that disgusting blood transfusion room - and yet, I found myself rising to my feet, grabbing my cloak and trudging beside my brother. We walked in companionable silence, and I realized with a dull pang that this was the first time I had seen…well spent some 'quality' time with him all week. With both of us saddled with so much work, our conversations and meetings tended to be brief and courteous.

Our 'walk' led us across the courtyard and into my private _onsen_, and I couldn't help the small smile that came to my lips as I watched my brother perform a task I had done several times over the years. He still knew which 'loose' stones to rearrange, and as the almost noiseless underground lair began to be revealed, we exchanged knowing smirks before descending into the waiting gloom below. We each grabbed an oil lamp – don't ask me how the flame never seemed to burn out because I knew for a fact I never refilled them – and made our way past the altar and toward the secret chamber where its natural-made 'shelves' were filled with scrolls and books I had never gotten around to finishing.

Assuming Itachi was going to show me something to read, I was surprised to notice him stooping to his haunches before one of the 'shelves' but only to loosen a few more stones on the dirt floor.

_What the hell is he…?_

"I'm sure it used to be here," he was muttering, and with one final light grunt, I watched in silent awe as one of the shelves began to grind its way slowly to the right; revealing yet another hidden chamber I did not even know existed. I don't believe father ever showed this to me, so how…when?

"It was a surprise to me too," Itachi admitted as if I had spoken my question out loud. We stepped into the much smaller chamber with its musty and even danker smell. "Father didn't know I was following him on that day when he opened this particular section. I believe he and Shisui's father came here together for something."

He placed his lamp on the floor and began to unravel some of the large scrolls stored rather haphazardly. "Maybe if we searched here, we can find something," he was saying as I mimicked his actions. "Dad couldn't have left us dirt poor for crying out loud."

"Why don't we just use some of the money you earned while you were in the triad?" I finally blurted out a thought that had crossed my mind while ruminating our dismal financial situation. "You were rich enough back then, weren't you?"

Itachi huffed and yanked down another scroll. "I doubt we'll want to get involved with those people right about now. We're trying to rebuild Byaku-Shinkyou into something positive, yes? What's the point of getting the mafia involved?"

_Because I'm crazy about someone who is now the leader of the goddamn Japanese mafia for one thing,_ my mind screamed as my gaze skimmed the fading words on a scroll.

_(how ironic, eh?)_

I would laugh at the situation, but hadn't I known from the beginning of just how different our paths were? I was on the side of 'good' and Naruto would be on the side of 'evil' – at least to those who were already prejudiced to the role of the _yakuza_ in society. Despite his good intentions of reforming the whole system, the stigma was still going to be there whether he liked it or not. He couldn't turn them all into saints overnight, and I couldn't and wouldn't turn a blind eye to anyone deciding to break the law in the name of his organization. My job was to keep the peace, and if Naruto's 'men' stumbled and went astray, I would not hesitate to bring them to justice…the right kind this time.

"A yen for your thoughts?" Itachi's voice teased as I glared at him and rolled my eyes. He chuckled and my cheeks burned. "You're so easy to read sometimes, my dearest little brother. At least when it comes to him."

"I'm not going to discuss Naruto with you, _dearest older brother_," I sneered as I reached for another scroll, only to curse softly as several of them fell and unraveled around my feet. I sighed and stooped to begin picking them up, when I noticed a set of what appeared to be photo albums stacked in the lower section of the shelf.

Albums? When was the last time I saw such things?

I pulled them out, blew out the layer of dust accumulated and opened it (with its fine leather and gold bound cover) to see the familiar slanting text of my father's handwriting.

_うちはイタチ __(__Uchiha Itachi)_

"Oooh?"

"What's that?" My brother asked as I turned to the first page to see the heartwarming photograph of my (very pregnant) mother standing before what appeared to be hospital. Ah, how young, beautiful (and so very happy) she looked. The next showed her standing beside my father – a father who was smiling…_smiling!_ – a rare sight indeed and one that brought a sharp pang to my chest. I hardly noticed Itachi now by my side as I turned over the page to view more pictures. It was as if I was watching a film of my brother's birth. From mother's admission into the hospital, to the touching moment when he was finally cradled within her arms. Subsequent photographs showed Itachi's growth over the years; baby pictures in some really dorky costumes only a mother could think of, Itachi's first steps, his first tooth, him wailing like a banshee, learning to swim, going to school…

"Wow…who knew Mom and Dad were so gung-ho over you?" I teased though I was more than aware of the tightness forming in my chest. There were three more albums devoted to Itachi, and when I finally came to mine…

_(only one)_

…I was trembling so much I could barely get myself to open the first page.

Itachi didn't seem to mind, for he took the album from me gently and did the honors. I bit my lower lip as I saw my name in father's familiar scribble.

_うちはサスケ __(Uchiha Sasuke)_

"July 23, 19xx," Itachi read softly. And just like his album, there was my mother looking just as beautiful before the very same hospital where her first son had been born. My father was beside her, smiling as he had, but this time cradling a five-year-old Itachi within his arms.

"Mom was so happy when she realized she was pregnant with you. They had been trying so hard but failed a few times, and just when Mom thought she would give up…you finally came along," Itachi said quietly as he turned over another page to show the various images of pre-birth to the one of Mom holding me in her arms and father placing a kiss on my forehead. My eyes burned and I looked away with dismay and shame.

All this time I had thought my father had been distant and unloving (for the most part) fueled more by Orochimaru's stories of how Dad had preferred to work rather than spend time with me. And just like that, all of those lies were now being squashed with photographic evidence revealing just how involved my father had been in my formative years.

There were photos of him carrying me at any opportunity he got, clapping his hands as I took my first steps, feeding me, changing my diapers, teaching me how to ride a tricycle and taking me to my first day of school.

They were wonderful memories; something I desperately needed to add to my once murky folders of my traumatic childhood. However, unlike Itachi's three albums, mine came to an abrupt end – the last picture ever taken being a simple but powerful family portrait. There was the smiling innocent me sitting on Itachi's lap, while flanked by our proud and beaming parents. Carefully, I peeled away the thin film protection and grabbed the photograph, which I tucked away in my cloak; almost daring Itachi to say something about what I had just done. But to my embarrassment, he did nothing but lean over to place a hard kiss on my forehead before sighing and eyeing the mess we had created.

"Reminiscing time is over," he mused. "Let's keep searching, eh?"

"…yeah," I mumbled and turned away; the photograph seemingly burning a hole against my thudding heart.

I wish I could say we found some hidden treasure in that second chamber, but we left a few hours later, tired, hungry and cranky. I was too exhausted to even look at my piles of paperwork and flopped onto my futon, wishing that Haku was around to give me a massage.

_(I miss having him around…)_

Miss _who_ exactly? Haku or Naruto?

Haku was still here and though he was still recovering, I did appreciate his attempts to keep me satisfied despite my urgings for him to get as much rest as possible. I hated to see him look so despondent whenever I sent him away, but at the same time, I hoped he realized I was trying to help/push him toward someone else who needed his attention. I wasn't blind. I knew how much Sasori had devoted himself to taking care of Haku, and was tremendously grateful that he was proving to be a good companion. And hey, who knew if that relationship could blossom into something else? I wanted Haku to be happy and if it turned out to be Sasori…

_(why worry about matchmaking other people when you're still all alone?)_

I groaned and buried my face in the pillow, hating the way that voice seemed to taunt me at every opportunity. It seemed to take pleasure in reminding me of how pathetic my situation was. It sucked to have to watch Itachi and Shisui share their intimate moments whenever they thought they were alone. During the day (and most nights) I could deal with the loneliness by immersing myself with my mounting responsibilities. However, there were times – like now – when the silence became too deafening; when my heartbeat seemed to be the only thunderous sound within my ears, and the ache – oh that _ache_ – would rise to the surface as every ticking second was a painful reminder that _he was not here._

There was no reason for me not to pick up a phone and speak to him since his success in defeating Ikegami and Danzo, but the stubborn side of me had balked at the idea. I was not going to be content with simply hearing his voice over some flimsy communication wire. I wanted to see him _in person_. Was that too much to ask? I wanted to touch him…to feel him…to smell him…to bury and fuse myself with him until we became one again. What good would his voice do to me over a telephone when I wanted it to breathe into my ear? I wanted to feel that warmth, that tingle to race down my spine, that toe-curling sensation of his tongue teasing me, those fine set of teeth nicking gently before biting into flesh to savor me as only he could.

_(ah fuck…)_

Some dreams had taken on quite graphic turns, and my humiliation at pleasuring myself in such pitiful fashion would later be replaced with anger and frustration at what the hell was taking him so long to see me. I tried to squash down the fear that he was changing his mind; that he had come to the conclusion that he no longer really needed me and had chosen to remain in the city and away from a place filled with not too many fond memories. Unfortunately, those fears would only last for a moment as the more carnal desires took precedence. Hadn't he made a promise to me? Wasn't it the honorable thing to fulfill that promise? So why, in God's name, was it taking him so long to make up his damn mind?

_(and when he does get here – after taking his sweet fucking time doing whatever it is those damn yakuza do – I'll punch his lights out and make him suffer for a while. That inconsiderate son-of-a-bitch!)_

My mood did not improve the next morning, and a few unfortunate officers had to deal with my short temper and clipped commands as I struggled to juggle the tasks of squad formations, rebuilding plans with architects and construction workers, and the annoying influx of phone calls from curious press _still_ wanting to speak to either me or Itachi about goodness knows what.

By mid-morning, I was already nursing a headache and wanted nothing more than to sink into my _onsen_ and forget the whole world existed. Sadly, I was still stuck behind my desk with plans to curse out (or kill) anyone who dared disturb me within the next thirty minutes. However, I should have known that such directives would fall on deaf ears when it came to a certain someone, and it didn't take long for him to come running into my office; slightly out of breath.

"Sas…Sasuke-sama…?" he panted.

I waved a hand without looking up and sighed heavily. "Not now, Haku. Please. I'm really busy."

"I know, but..." He sounded really excited for some reason. "Someone…he's here…"

Great. Who was it now? Yet another 'professional' engineer hoping to discuss what the hell was to be done with that god-forsaken Gudan arena? I might just turn it into a baseball field –

"If it's a construction worker," I began absentmindedly, "Just tell him to wait or talk to Officer Kurobachi until I'm ready."

"It's not a construction worker!" Haku finally blurted out as if sick and tired of my attitude. "It's Naruto-kun! He's here! He's _really_ here!"

Sure you read it in books or see it in movies at how 'shocked' a person reacts to such mind-numbing news, and perhaps one would roll his or her eyes at how clichéd it all seems. But I swear to you, dear reader, that every damn emotion described in those books or seen in those movies applied to me in that very instant. Every angry and frustrated thought I had built up, suddenly seemed to crumble to nothing as my heart –

_(this foolish heart of mine)_

…literally leapt within my chest and began a staccato beat that was unlike anything I had ever experienced before. I trembled, so much so the pen I had been holding like a vice, collapsed to the table and rolled to the floor from limp fingers. I couldn't move and yet every part of me screamed to get the fuck out of the chair and to see for myself if Haku was telling the truth. Cue in the drying of the mouth and my suddenly parched tongue desperately licking lips that longed to be quenched by…by…

"It's…are you sure?" someone (me apparently) asked in a voice that sounded anything but as chaotic as I felt inside. I had to pat myself on the back for sounding so collected though the very act of breathing normally was proving to be a little difficult.

Haku nodded and if the silent tears of joy rolling down his cheeks were any indication, I knew he couldn't possibly be lying.

"Where…where is he…?" I asked as I finally rose unsteadily to my feet, but I needn't have bothered for an answer as a familiar figure first placed his hand upon the shoulder of my beloved manservant – to squeeze gently - before finally revealing himself in all his magnificent glory.

_(that…smile…oh God…he hasn't changed one bit)_

"Sorry I'm late," came the warm greeting as my blue-eyed sinner grinned sheepishly. "I swear this place has changed so much since the last time, I couldn't help looking around for a while…"

He stopped rambling long enough to notice something in my expression because the grin slowly disappeared only to be replaced with a light smirk and an undisputed glint of mischief within those eyes.

"Fine then, Sasuke. You hereby have the permission to kick my ass for as long and as much as you want."


	45. 45: An Unbreakable Bond

**Notes:** Well, what can I say? It's been a journey and I have learned and grown a lot along the way (just like these characters). I would like to say a big, big, BIG thank you to every single person that has left a review or made this story a favorite. Especially to SilverSauce – who has always left long and lengthy reviews for every single chapter – if I'm not mistaken. *lol* However, long or short comments, they always mean a lot and helped to get this story finished. There were times when I did feel like abandoning it, but you spurred me on and for that, I am eternally grateful. I will miss my boys/characters no doubt about it, but I hope the next two chapters (which must be read slooooowly and thoroughly!) will leave you all with a smile and not too heartbroken.

Thank you all again for everything *bows gratefully* The Naruto fandom has been good to me so far, so this might be my final gift to it (all depends on darn Kisihimoto breaking my heart with his latest chapters)

And so for the last time…enjoy and farewell, my dears!

**Warnings:** Mature content ahead! Don't read with the kiddies or bosses around.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 45<strong>

**An Unbreakable Bond**

_I have met my love._

_When I compare this present_

_With feelings of the past,_

_My passion is now as if_

_I have never loved before._

_**Fujiwara no Atsutada**_

* * *

><p><strong>Byaku-Shinkyou<strong>

**Hokkaido, Hokkaido Prefecture**

_Naruto:_

It never fails.

No matter how many times you rehearse and paint the perfect reunion scenarios in your head – and I swear at some point I did imagine seeing blooming flowers, a choir singing, and Sasuke running toward me in super slow motion, where we'd then jump into each other's arms (still in slo-mo), and then we'd pretty much rip each other's clothes off and fuck like bunnies until we couldn't move anymore.

_(yeah right)_

You can insert the deafening sound of a car screeching to a halt at this point because – as you can well imagine – Reality tends to slap you hard in the face while laughing its ass off at the same time.

Of course I should have known he wouldn't come flying into my arms. This was Mr. Cool, Calm and Collected, remember? And besides the brief blink-and-you-just-might-miss-it widening of his eyes – at the sight of me – it was quickly replaced with his usual look of irritation. In other words, it was the 'cut-the-crap-and-get-to-the-point-already' expression I was all too familiar with.

_(ah, how I've missed your subtle ways of expressing affection, Sasuke)_

It still didn't lessen the effect of seeing him again after so many months of separation. It was literally like being punched in the gut, you know? But the good kind of punch; the one that leaves you breathless and desperately trying to gulp fresh air, but you can't because every fiber of your being is thrumming with an energy that makes you want to fuck decorum and pounce on the bastard and just forget every other person in the universe and –

"…found him walking around the grounds," someone was saying. It took me almost a full minute to realize it was Haku chattering on in excitement as he squeezed my arm and brought me back to reality. I swear it took a monumental effort to tear my gaze away from Sasuke – and will down the burning feverish sensation that was beginning to form in the pit of my stomach – as I cleared my throat and gave another sheepish smile. Let's just hope he really didn't take up my offer of kicking my ass.

"I couldn't believe it at first," Haku gushed happily and wrapped his arms around me in a hug. Embarrassed yet ridiculously pleased at his attention and outright affection for me, I returned the favor with an arm around his waist and a hard kiss on the top of his head. He didn't help matters by choosing to look up then; eyes all shiny and looking as if…

_(ah hell)_

…the tears did break free anyway. "I had to do a double-take to make sure I wasn't seeing things, but when you turned and I noticed those scars…I…I," So overcome with emotion, he buried his face against my shirt.

"We missed you so, so, so much. Especially Sasuke-sama," his muffled voice reached my ears, and I looked up to meet Sasuke's gaze at this 'confession'; grinning now at the unmistakable flood of color that now stained his cheeks. He sputtered and shook his head, trying to make a show of arranging the documents on his desk; his discomfort at being 'called-out' evident.

_(ah, be still my heart)_

I swear if Haku wasn't here, I just might have lunged across this damning space between us and kissed the living daylights out of him. To hell with decorum…etiquette…whatever you want to call it.

"Haku," Sasuke finally managed to say, with a strained cough, as he met my gaze again and just about melted off my clothes. "If you don't mind excusing us for a min -"

"Sasuke-sama!" came the sudden loud interruption as a group of five men (dressed like construction workers) came stomping up the short flight of steps leading to Sasuke's office. The leader was a giant of man with a striking similarity to a grizzly bear (if bears could wear human clothing and talk), and with the way he spoke, he sounded like he had no time to waste on anything.

"Sasuke-sama," he bellowed. "May we have a moment with you? It's about the foundations for the East Wing of the prisoners' quarters. You said you'd be there about half-an-hour ago and we really need to get this started -"

"Give me five minutes," Sasuke cut in sharply with a raised hand to silence the man. Gone was the blush and flustered look to be replaced with his more business-like demeanor (and annoyance if I'm not mistaken). "I'll be there."

"Yes, but -"

"_Five_ minutes, Tazuna-san."

Tazuna opened his mouth to bitch again, but decided against it once he noticed the dark look on his boss's face. With a grunt, he spun on his heels and marched off with his buddies in tow while muttering something under his breath. Oddly enough, this scene is one that I've become used to since my 'coronation' as the boss of the Senju Syndicate. I've had quite a few disgruntled _yakuza_ family heads storm into Jiraiya's office wanting something or another from either of us, and when they don't get it, they retreat with muttered threats.

"Busy day, huh?" I asked with some sympathy, though a part of me was annoyed as well. So much for pouncing on him and making out on his office desk – or maybe I should just add that to my list of things to do around here in the near future…

"It has been chaotic," Sasuke admitted with a heavy sigh. He scratched the back of his head and gave me a wan smile that had the ol' heart pitter-pattering again, and when he finally broke away from his 'sanctuary' (the desk) –

_(damn, I've almost forgotten how intimidating yet so fucking good he looks in that goddamn uniform)_

…the second thing I noticed was the slight limp he was doing a rather good job of masking with his steady steps. I bit my lower lip in worry; wondering just how bad the fight with Orochimaru had gone. Hell, just imagining what that bastard must have done to Sasuke was something that had kept me up a few nights even after I heard the good news of his death. I searched his face (the rest of his body was covered with so many layers of the traditional clothing it was impossible to tell), but there were no visible scars to tell of any longer lasting damage. He must have noticed my concern, because he gave a light shrug and another smile; this one much warmer and with the hint of a promise of what was to come.

_(I hope)_

"Haku will show you around," he said as he came to a stop before us and nodded toward his flushed (ex) manservant. "I'm sure you'll want to catch up with a few old friends…well Karin at least. Ah, speaking of which…whatever happened to Shikamaru and Temari?"

I raised a brow with a quirk of my lips. "I thought Itachi would have filled you in. Since he's the only one who had the decency to call Jiraiya to find out about my welfare unlike someone else I know-"

"Shut the hell up," Sasuke grumbled with a dark blush, and smacked me on the arm as he turned to leave, but I caught that hand before he could pull away completely. Call me a sentimental fool, but after months of dreams (both good and bad), it was amazing how just simply touching his hand alone, and not being able to control myself as I raised it to my lips to place a gentle kiss within his palm – brought a hard lump to my throat. I barely heard his gasp, but did feel the immediate reaction as he trembled and tried to pull away as if embarrassed.

I looked up then and wasn't disappointed; for that beautiful face was doing a very good impression of a tomato, while giving me a tantalizing view of his teeth as he bit hard on his lower lip.

_(we have a lot of catching up to do, Sasuke. There're so many things I want to tell you…share with you…)_

"I…I have to go…" came the breathless plea. "They're waiting-"

"I know," I whispered with a sigh. I held his hand to my cheek for a moment; perhaps to make certain that this wasn't actually a dream, before releasing him reluctantly with a gentle squeeze. "Later, right?"

He couldn't speak and chose to settle for a nod to myself and Haku in acknowledgement, before turning away. We watched him in silence until he made the turn around the corner and was out of sight. The instinct to trot after him and watch him at work was interrupted at the sudden light tug on my arm.

"Let's go, Naruto-kun," Haku said with a bright smile. "There's so much to show you! Karin-chan is going to be so surprised to see you -"

"Ah…okay…"

_(my apologies, Haku)_

I felt bad that I had forgotten about him during those few precious moments with Sasuke, and felt a light pang of guilt at having to showcase my affection for his master in that way. However, Haku didn't seem all too bothered. Or maybe he's gotten better at hiding it.

He didn't let go of my hand as he led me down familiar – yet unfamiliar – paths I once walked while dressed in an outfit that would make a burlap sack look fashionable. Today, however, I had chosen to be in Western clothes, perhaps as homage to how I had arrived here over a year ago.

_(how time flies…)_

Jiraiya hadn't wanted me to leave at first, saying there were still a whole lot more things I had to deal with before I decided to take my 'vacation' with the 'boyfriend'. Besides, he insisted that I ought to take it easy for at least two more months before straining myself. I might be relatively healed from my injuries, but I didn't want to push my luck, did I?

And so for at least a month after my release from the hospital, I did as he asked, moving into my brand spankin' new home that was already tricked out with everything I could ever possibly need. This place was huge! And to be honest, after living most of my life in either cramped apartments or in prisons/dungeons, having to come to such a mansion - where I wasn't likely to be shot at by its wealthy owner who might mistake me for a criminal - was hard to get used to. My King-sized bed felt like wallowing in an ocean of loneliness, and I'd find myself trying to kill time by either bugging Jiraiya to death with inane calls or hanging out with my boys (the now six swordsmen who were now personal bodyguards…well they've always been my bodyguards, but now it's a permanent thing). I really missed having Shika by my side, and since he hadn't given me a phone number to reach him (yet), I couldn't pester him as much as I would have liked. I contemplated calling Byaku-Shinkyou a few times, but I had no idea what phone number was used. I did ask Jiraiya about it, but all he'd say is that Itachi had a special number that was not publicly accessible. Whatever the hell that meant.

Twice I went on 'dates' with Kurotsuchi. She was fun to hang out with, but when I realized she was beginning to get a little too attached to me, I had to nip that relationship in the bud before it got out of hand. Let's just say she didn't take it too well with the break-up, and last I checked she wasn't speaking to me "ever again". All the same, I sent her a large bouquet of flowers via Akatsuchi, who is at least still speaking to me and doesn't mind sharing a bowl of ramen at one of my favorite restaurants every once in a while. Grandpa Onoki, meanwhile, is still enjoying his retirement. I had the opportunity to visit his cottage by the sea and spent quite a pleasant afternoon trying to fish with the crusty old man. Between insulting me (fondly) and hating every damn fish in the ocean (though we did finally manage to snag two beautiful carps), his words of wisdom and advice will remain with me for as long as I live.

In addition to those three, my relationship with Gaara was going quite well too. We met a few times over dinner, where I came to learn he wasn't all about politics and boring the pants off me with talks about reforming the government. He did have plans to visit Byaku-Shinkyou someday and wanted me to put in a good word to Itachi and Sasuke on his behalf. As if I needed to do that. After all he had done for them, those brothers should be rolling out the red carpet and sprinkling him with rose petals when he showed up! As for his personal life, he was not affiliated with anyone (male or female), though the press had a field day trying to hook him up with every other single female celebrity out there. When I teased him about it, all he'd do was laugh and wave a hand in dismissal. "Politics is my life, Naruto," he said. "Relationships will have to come much later."

Hey, whatever floats his boat, right?

Anyway, all this was good and well, but eventually I had to bail. I simply couldn't take it anymore. Yes, I was now wealthy beyond my wildest dreams, could have any woman I wanted, had more social power in my pinky finger than I knew what to do with, but I was still miserable inside and I knew why. It was hard to explain it to Jiraiya, who really couldn't understand why I'd want to return, but that was only because I was still so shy in telling him the real motive behind it. That the only reason why I was sucking up the queasiness in my stomach (some memories just don't fade away) was because the one person I'd give all this up for, was waiting for me.

"I have to go," I remember telling Jiraiya as we shared a cup of _sake_ on the veranda of his home. "Just to…tie up some loose ends…"

"Is that really the reason or are you bullshitting me, you little brat?"

I blushed and lowered my gaze to the ground. "Just for a little while -"

"What do you consider a little while?" the old man asked. "You have new responsibilities here as well, Naruto. I know you wish to go back to Sasuke, and you don't have to look so flabbergasted, I wasn't born yesterday you know." He cackled and shook his head before sobering up to give me an intense look. "I will not live forever and one day, you'll have to take the reins of the Senju, Naruto. What then? Will you choose to remain up there for him and give this all up?"

He sighed and looked to the heavens where the night sky was an inky as I've ever seen. "You've started a good thing with the organization so far. Your rehabilitation idea where strays who might have wanted to join the _yakuza_ for the wrong reasons are now made to register for a legitimate trade or school, has yielded some positive results so far. We might be on the right path, but make no mistake, our enemies are still plenty. Other countries that envy us will send in their members to try to ruin things. I will need your leadership when that time comes, and I do not want to have to go searching all over the damn place for you, Naruto. As much as the burden is on me now, eventually it will shift to you when my time comes. I just want you to be mentally and emotionally prepared when it happens."

I frowned, my fingers tightening around the cup, as his words hit me. He didn't need to remind me. I was already more than aware of what he was saying as those possibilities had crossed my mind quite a few times. However…

"You're right," I finally said aloud. "Things aren't going to be easy, and I know I cannot rely on you forever. That is why I am keeping an eye on those family heads I can really trust, but most importantly, why our relationship with Byaku-Shinkyou and the Watchdogs in general cannot be shaken. However, unlike our predecessors, I would hope that Sasuke and Itachi would use their new power for good and to protect us against those 'bad guys' as you so put it. No underhanded means or bribery need be tolerated."

I sat back on the chair and stretched out my legs before sighing heavily. "It's funny…once upon a time I used to dream I'd be a big shot and boss people around like they used to do to me when I was nothing more than an orphan on the streets. Well damn. Now that I'm a 'big shot'…it's not as cracked up as I thought it would be."

Jiraiya gave a light chuckle and raised his cup to me. "Welcome to the high life, Uzumaki Naruto. Where you come to learn that sometimes, it's extremely lonely at the top."

"Tell me about it."

We drank to that and remained in companionable silence for a while, before he asked me quietly.

"…so…Uchiha Sasuke, eh?"

I glanced at him in confusion. "What do you mean?"

A smile curved his lips and he gave me a playful wink; bringing a rush of color to my cheeks as I realized exactly what he meant. "I would like to have a grandchild to play with someday, but considering Sasuke's not female…unless there's something he's not telling us -"

"You're not my grandfather," I mumbled in embarrassment. "And besides, he's definitely male and who said anything about -!"

"Hahaha! Relax, Naruto. I'm just teasing you. Whoever you choose to fall in love and spend the rest of your life with is no concern of mine. Your father made his choice despite the dangers he faced, and though you might not have to deal with the same issues…you have to admit that your relationship with Sasuke is one that might have to remain in the shadows for a long time."

_(no kidding)_

I turned away from his pitying look and stared blindly into the lush foliage around us. Fireflies danced in and out like dying fireworks, as Jiraiya's harsh reality sobered me up completely. Yes. It was all well and good to be in love with Sasuke, to want to be with him for the rest of my life etc. etc., but like Itachi and Shisui, there was no way we could ever make it public to the rest of the world. We would be shunned or mocked or worse, not taken seriously. And in my testosterone-driven world – the _yakuza_ – where homophobia was rampant like a plaque, the very idea that the head of the Senju could be involved with another male was a big no-no.

"Hah," I muttered with a bitter smile. "Don't you wish you could just say 'fuck it' and go out together hand-in-hand and not give a damn what people think?"

Jiraiya cocked his head with a small smile. "That would be the ideal scenario in an ideal world, wouldn't it? But we do not live in an ideal world…no matter how much we try to create that in our minds."

"The real world sucks," I complained with a pout.

Jiraiya chuckled again and nodded. "I second that, young man. I second that. Oh and by the way…"

"Hmm?"

He grinned and leaned over to gently touch his cup to mine in a toast. "Happy Twentieth birthday, young man. Here's to many more."

I blushed and swallowed the sudden lump in my throat, for the last time anyone had said those two words to me, it was from a pink-haired girl I had once thought the world of. At least I could take heart in knowing that Jiraiya was more sincere in his sentiments.

He didn't protest when I called him the next day from a bus station telling him that I was on my way up North. He simply wished me the best of luck and hoped that I'd at least return sometime before the end of the year to keep up with my 'side-of-things'. With the promise to do so, I bought my tickets and prepared myself for the long trip ahead.

Memories – like a never-ending unraveling spool of thread – returned as I stepped foot into the weathered bus. For a disheartening moment, time was peeled and I was back in that hot stuffy bus with men of all shapes and sizes doomed for a bleak future. The only ray of light would be that beautiful 'woman' with the porcelain skin, who had watched us from her lofty throne, and me…hopelessly unaware of how my life would change with my simple 'mistake'.

"Keep moving, Mister Blondie! You're holding up the line!"

The shrill voice shattered the illusion, and I quickly apologized to the plump woman who had hit me with her handbag in an attempt to walk past me. Reality presented a much different scene from the horrors in my mind. I wasn't in a bus filled with men that smelled of sweat and fear, but a variety of individuals; all colorful and vibrant (well to me at least because a few of them looked like they were ready to fall asleep with boredom). I couldn't help grinning stupidly as I sat beside a pretty brunette and her baby cradled within her arms. For the majority of the trip, we engaged in pleasant conversation, and I even got to play with her little one for a while…until he decided to pee on me. Thankfully, we made a quick pit stop where I changed into cleaner clothes and was apologized to profusely by the embarrassed mother.

By the second day, the bus was considerably lighter with its passenger load. My new friend and her baby had stopped at the previous station, where she promised to visit me whenever she stopped by Kyoto in the future. The weather was now much colder, but I was prepared with the black overcoat I had in my possession. I stared out the window at a familiar stark landscape; my stomach filling with nervous butterflies and another emotion that could only be considered a visceral reaction to the horrifying experiences I once had in that place. However, it was superseded with a more pleasant feeling of nervous excitement, fueled by the fantasy sequences of how meeting Sasuke would be. So lost was I in my dreams, that I almost missed the conductor yelling for us to get out.

_(ah, that's right. The bus doesn't take you into the grounds like before. Forgot all about that)_

With my lone duffel bag, I stepped into a cool mid-morning day and had my first severe bout of déjà vu. However, it was a little different this time. I could already see the changes even before I began the relatively long walk across the bridge leading up to the gates of Byaku-Shinkyou. Once intimidating and protected by armed guards, the grand gates were now wide open for everyone. There were guards still stationed there, however their only duty was to make sure no troublemaker gained entrance. Instead of prisoners and guards marching in and out, normal civilians – many dragging in luggage, wagons or horses with goods – strolled in and out with a sense of excitement and anticipation. Signs of construction were visible from the moment I crossed the threshold. I could see the extensive damage brought about by the fires and battle that must have taken place, and between volunteers, builders and other civilians trying to get to their new homes, the guards had their hands full trying to organize everyone. It was a wonderful chaotic scene and one that brought joy to my heart at what Byaku-Shinkyou must have been before Orochimaru's reign. That joy was seen in every gaze you met; that the air - once thick with fear and death – now blossomed with happiness and a hope for the future. You felt the ridiculous urge to grab the next person and hug him or her to death, to ruffle a child's hair and to tell them that everything was going to be all right from now on.

_(amazing)_

As if in a daze, I wandered toward familiar haunts. The temple still stood proud and imposing, and it was where most of the visitors went to, either to pray or drop off their offerings. I stopped by the dojo – which was closed off for renovation – allowing a wry smile to come to my features at the memory of the fight I had there with Sasuke. If Asuma hadn't butt in, I might not be standing here today. With a shake of my head, I made my way to the kitchens which was still fully functioning. Unfortunately, old man Chef was no longer a part of the crew and there were quite a few new faces I did not recognize. Even Chouji was no longer there, and I sincerely hoped he hadn't been caught in the battle and was back home safe and sound with his family. The shed where I used to have lunch with Shika (and Haku) was still standing, but was now being used to store building materials.

It was during this time - while wandering toward the East and West Blocks – did I finally meet up with Haku. I probably would have missed the guy if he didn't suddenly cry out my name. Man, I couldn't even begin to tell you how happy I was to see him again, so much so I practically lifted him off the ground with my over exuberant hug. He hadn't changed much…well except for a sort of sadness within his eyes whenever he was quiet. I guess he will never really get over the death of Kimimaro no matter how much of a bastard that guy was to him.

"Christ, Haku! Just what the hell is wrong with you?" I asked out loud with a mock pout. "You seem to get prettier and prettier every passing day, damn it!"

His giggle warmed my heart and brought back memories of the better times we had both here and in Buk-gu. I couldn't resist placing hard kisses on his cheeks and hugging him again, and if we got weird looks from people, I didn't give a damn.

"I can't wait to tell Sasuke-sama you're here!" he gushed and then began to jog away from me before I could stop him. It wasn't the way I planned the reunion to go, but Haku was already making his way toward the administrative area, and I had no other choice but to trail after him; desperately trying to come up with suitable excuses to tell Sasuke.

All I could hope is that I didn't make a fool of myself and start blubbering like a moron.

* * *

><p>Heh, at least I didn't cry, so I'd say the whole process went relatively well.<p>

Haku, who was still holding my hand, and talking at a mile-a-minute about every little thing that was being done to renovate the grounds, finally stopped to take a breather when we noticed a group of guys hard at work repainting the walls in a section that used to be a part of the officers' mess.

"Sasori-sama!" Haku called out with an enthusiasm that had me raising a brow; this was only compounded when the Sasori guy (who looked as young as Haku, though I'd later learn he was about Shisui's age) noticed and smiled warmly at my companion.

_(hmmm…)_

"What are you doing here, Haku?" Sasori asked as he approached. The guy didn't even look at me; his whole attention focused squarely on the blushing _(huh?)_ man beside me.

"I was just showing Naruto-kun around," Haku explained breathlessly, and at the sound of my name, Sasori (as well as the other guys) finally took notice. Needless to say; the instant change in their body language was slightly embarrassing. I wasn't sure what they'd heard about me, but there was no denying the respect in their eyes - though the guy with the silverish hair had a shit-eating smirk on his face.

"So you're the famous Uzumaki Naruto, eh? Can't believe someone like you is actually now the head of the Senju Syndicate. You've got a pretty dumb-looking fa -"

"Suigetsu-san!" Haku hissed; reminding everyone of how fiercely loyal he could be to those he cared about. "You will speak to Naruto-kun with respect."

Suigetsu huffed and rolled his eyes before jumping off his perch on the wall to stroll off. Geez. What was his problem anyway?

"Sasori," came the quiet greeting as the redhead held out his hand to me to shake. "I have heard great things about you, Uzumaki Naruto. We all have."

"Yeah," said the long-haired blond man who had actually been painting the familiar Uchiha clan symbol on the wall. He dropped his paint brush long enough to give me a sweaty-palmed handshake. "Great job with those bastards. I'm Deidara by the way."

"Eh…thanks…and nice to meet you," I replied shyly; not sure what to make of this.

"I am Aburame Shino," the dude with the dark glasses and wrapped in a hoodie, said solemnly as he shook my hand as well. "And the one coming is Rock Lee."

Rock…Lee? Yikes! Talk about bushy-eyebrows and what was with that bowl haircut anyway?

"Uzumaki Naruto?" he cried out enthusiastically as he dropped the large box of building materials he had been carrying to pump my hand in a firm handshake. He grinned and stood back to scrutinize me unabashedly. "So we finally get to see the face behind it all. You're definitely a man of mystery, aren't you?"

"Ah well -"

"We must share a cup of _sake_ one of these days, Naruto," Lee yakked on happily, completely oblivious to the rolled eyes this elicited from the other men. "I look forward to hearing your thoughts on the latest world affairs especially with your power in the underwor -"

"Lee. What's taking you so long?" came the firm but low voice that had us all turning to notice the tall pale-eyed man wearing the watchdog uniform. His long dark hair fluttered gently in the breeze, and when our eyes met, I felt a light (not unpleasant) chill go down my spine. Who the hell was this guy? There was something about his eyes that made you believe he could look right through you and see every dark and hidden secret you might have. I don't believe I ever saw him when I was here, and it made me wonder if he was a long lost cousin of Sasuke or maybe a distant relative of the Uchiha clan in general. Those damn eyes…

"That's Hyūga Neji," Haku whispered into my ear as Lee – looking flustered as if reprimanded – picked up his box to trot after Neji who hadn't even waited to be introduced. Kinda reminded me of Sasuke with his attitude in some way…

"Neji?" I asked aloud. "Is he an officer?"

"Sasuke just promoted him to one," Haku explained with a smile. "He's quite nice when you get to know him. He can be aloof on the onset, so don't take it to heart."

"We were all members of Akatsuki," Sasori said with a light nod. "Itachi and Shisui led us for many years and we remain loyal to their cause, which is why we are here helping to rebuild." He stole a quick but meaningful glance at Haku, which I would have missed if Haku hadn't chosen to squeeze my hand a little and look down with that damned blush.

_(curiouser and curiouser)_

It wasn't until we had excused ourselves from the other guys did I finally blurt out what's been bugging me all this time.

"Hakuuuuu?" I called out slowly as we approached the clinic, but forced him to stop just before we got there. "Is there something you want to tell me?"

He kept his head lowered and shook it hard as if he was a kid caught stealing from the cookie jar. I pretended to tap my foot impatiently. "If you don't start talking, then we're not going anywhere. Spill, man. You and Sasori are an item now, eh?"

He looked up with widened eyes, his entire face a picture of embarrassment and an adorable innocence that had me laughing. He slapped his cheeks as if hoping they'd stop turning so red and tried to look annoyed. "It's not funny, Naruto-kun," he muttered shyly. "Sasori-sama and I are just really good friends, that's all."

"Uh huh, and I'm the Easter Bunny."

"It's true!" he insisted. "And he's been nothing but a gentleman and hasn't gone out of his way to make any overt moves toward me, but he cares about me and that's why I think I'm going to leave with him as he's asked!"

_Eh?_

I blinked at this and Haku must have realized what he said because he slapped a hand over his mouth aghast.

"What do you mean 'leave with him as he asked'?" I prodded. "Does Sasuke know about this?"

Haku sighed and sank onto one of the many benches loitered around the grounds. He looked at his hands for a long minute before forcing himself to look at me. "Not yet. I was actually going to tell him about it today and was heading to his office to do so when I noticed you." He gave a weak smile. "It's a long story, Naruto-kun, but…I think this is something I have to do…something I _must_ do. Sasuke-sama…and you…have been so very good to me from the start, even though I wasn't all…good at times," he ended with a shy mumble that I waved away in dismissal. We were both guilty of not 'being good' all the time, so he had nothing to apologize for.

"And when I saw the way you and Sasuke-sama reacted to each other in his office…" He lowered his gaze with a wistful smile on his visage. "A part of me felt a little envious at how in love you two are. There's no denying it now, so don't try to convince me otherwise, Naruto-kun."

Now it was my turn to become crimson as I coughed lightly and suddenly found a clump of bushes interesting. That obvious, huh?

"Sasuke-sama has been so alone all this time even though he's got so much work to do. Day after day, he is swamped with obligations; even you must have noticed the dark circles around his eyes. He rarely gets any sleep if at all. It's come to a point where I think he simply goes through the motions and yet... all it took was your name to be mentioned and that fire…that light was back in his eyes again." Haku sighed with a small smile. "I want that feeling too, Naruto-kun. I want to be able to be with someone who I can come to at the end of a long day and not worry if I can trust him or not. So far Sasori-sama has proven to be that person, and he's not asking for much in return. I'm not saying it's him for sure, but…I won't know if I don't try…right?" he asked shyly.

_(once upon a time you told me the very same thing, Haku. You asked me to give your master a chance and look what happened)_

I cupped his chin gently to speak in what I hoped was a sincere tone. "It's your life, Haku. You have to do what's best for you. I'm sure Sasuke will be surprised, but he's a big boy. I doubt he'll prevent you from seeking your happiness."

"I know he won't, but I was hoping _you'd_ be a little jealous," he said with a light smirk and a teasing glint in his eye. I mock growled and tried to tickle him for being so cheeky. He was right in a way. I had felt a light pang of…jealousy; that or maybe I was just still slightly possessive over him. After all remembering the way I (and Sasuke) had tailed him during his doomed date with Sai, I think my 'paternal/big brother' instincts were kicking in again. I didn't know much about this Sasori character, but I swear to God, if he ever did anything to hurt Haku –

"…the look on his face!" came the sudden familiar feminine voice, coupled with twin giggles, that had us both stopping our playful antics to exchange a look and smile.

_Good ol' Karin!_

And sure enough, the red-haired woman soon appeared from around the corner, wearing what looked like hospital scrubs in pastel pink – accompanied by a pretty dark-haired girl dressed in similar clothing with -

_(oh!)_

…the same weird eyes as that Neji. _Christ!_ How many more of these estranged Uchiha family branch members were now crawling out of the woodwork?

"Karin-chan!" I cried out and tried to lunge for her in a hug. However, old habits (and instincts) do die hard because I found myself almost kissing the ground as she pushed me away with a scream of terror. Haku was busy laughing so hard, he could hardly speak. Way to help me out, man.

"It's Naruto-kun," he finally sputtered when he could catch his breath and just as Karin was about to roll up her sleeves to finish me off.

She pushed her glasses a little higher up the bridge of her nose and peered at me as if examining a specimen. When she was finally sure I was human, she blinked and sagged her shoulders in relief. "Damn it, Naruto! Introduce yourself first before trying to attack me!"

"I was only trying to hug you," I protested as I struggled to my feet with a pout. "What the hell is wrong with…mmmffh!"

She felt warm, soft yet strong as she suddenly engulfed me in the mother of all hugs. Her shoulders heaved gently, and even without hearing it (her sobs were muffled against my shirt), I hugged her just as tightly. So what if she rebuffed my advances and wouldn't give me the time of day in that department? She was still a cool chick and had gone out of her way to take care of me when necessary. I caressed her back in soothing circles, simply allowing her to cry as I shared a look with Haku and the shy smile the other woman was giving me. Of course I would be lying if my more superficial side didn't notice that said woman had quite the rack, but I had no time to ponder bra sizes, because Karin finally pulled back to take off her glasses, while sniffling at the same time.

"Took you long enough to show up," she said with a mock pout, while wiping the lenses with the bottom of her top. I had the grace to blush and look sheepish.

"Sorry…I've been up to my eyeballs with shit…eh…things as well," I said quickly, but all I got was a light punch on my chest as she blushed and slipped her glasses on again. She seemed to straighten up before reaching out to tug the quiet woman closer.

"This is Hyūga Hinata. She works with me at the clinic. Hinata, this is Uzumaki Naruto. I'm sure you must have heard of him."

Hinata's blush deepened as she gave a cute curtsey in greeting. "It's a pleasure to finally meet you face to face, Naruto-sama."

_(Eh? Sama?)_

"Just Naruto's fine," I said quickly as I bowed a little. I wasn't sure a hug would be appropriate; though darn carnal instincts begged to feel that full bosom pressed against…

_(okay, I really do need to find Sasuke and fast)_

"Come help us get some medical supplies," Karin invited with a smile. "The bus that usually delivers it has just arrived, and I need to do some inventory. We can catch up on the way, eh?"

"Sure!" I might as well keep myself busy for a while. It was also during this time that I gathered a few more details about the battle, the aftermath, and Hinata's relationship with Neji (cousins). Like the rest of the Akatsuki members, she and Karin planned to stay here for as long as Itachi (and Sasuke) needed them. I couldn't help asking about the eye thing, and Hinata explained that no, they were in no way related to the Uchiha, though it was once believed that their ocular powers were almost as strong – if not stronger – than Sasuke's clan. Interesting.

By the time we were done, I was dead on my feet and starving. You mustn't forget that I had just gotten off a two-day bus ride, hadn't had the time to take a shower or rest my feet since I arrived. Luckily, Haku finally got the hint and dragged me away from the ladies who wanted me to join them for a lunch that seemed to consist of only salads and fruits (bah! I needed some real food!). We grabbed my duffel bag from Sasuke's office (he wasn't back yet), and Haku led me to my quarters for the night.

Compared to the chaos around the rest of the grounds, this section – which was surrounded by a low brick wall with that familiar symbol of the Uchiha clan etched upon it - was quiet and peaceful, heightened by a beautiful well-tended traditional Japanese garden filled with plants that could only blossom in such cold weather. Beside this was a large koi pond accentuated with a miniature waterfall that created a soothing ripple effect if you stared into the pond long enough. Both garden and pond sat in the midst of a set of bungalows forming a quadrangle of sorts.

Many of the doors to each room were closed – at least the left side of the quadrangle – and it didn't take a scientist to know why there was a sort of 'ghostly' atmosphere about it. I shivered at the idea that Sasuke had lived here all these years with said ghosts for company; knowing that once these lawns and verandas had been filled with happy laughter shared by a close-knit family...it was just too cruel to have to relive that day after day, wasn't it?

Haku – oblivious to my pensive thoughts – pushed open a shoji screen door to reveal a neat room with a few personal items that could only belong to one person. Hell, just that familiar scent that was unique to Sasuke had me trembling a little.

"…I don't get my own room?" I finally asked with a smirk as my host set my things down in a corner.

Haku – smart little bastard – grinned and shook his head. "Sasuke-sama would kill me if I put you anywhere else. Besides, you can't tell me you didn't want to be here anyway, Naruto-kun."

"Why I oughta…!"

I pretended to want to throttle him, but he ducked out of the way with a laugh and made his escape, but only to stop once he was on the veranda.

"I'm really glad you came back, Naruto-kun," he said with such sincerity, damn if that stupid lump didn't form in my throat. His eyes were too shiny, but he hid it with a deep bow that did not betray the pain he must have been feeling (Karin told me about his wound while Haku was out of earshot). I didn't want to tell him to 'go and take a break' because I was sure the last thing he needed was for me to remind him of his physical disability. So instead, I gave him my warmest smile.

"Thank you, Haku," I said fondly. "For everything."

If the eyes are the portals to the soul, I think Haku let me see that beautiful soul one last time that afternoon. I really was glad that someone like him came into my life; that all those months ago, he saw something in me and decided to befriend me instead of walking away. He's a good kid, and I really wish him all the happiness in the world.

For now - while he goes to get me some food - I just need to find the damn bathroom, take a shower and catch a few winks before meeting up with Sasuke.

Something tells me I'm going to need all the energy I can conserve.

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke (and Haku):<em>

He tried.

He really did try to be as focused as he ought to be. Unfortunately, every word droned from Tazuna or his companions' lips assumed the tone of voices trapped in a container; muffled and barely audible. His right hand hasn't stopped tingling from the warmth of Naruto's kiss or the sensation of that skin when it was pressed to the blond's scarred cheek. He hadn't even been aware of his subconscious way of 'protecting' the hand during the tedious meetings; keeping it to his side most often and choosing his left to either point or emphasize something. He refused to shake hands with anyone, choosing to bow lightly or simply acknowledge their existence with the repetition of their names. Sometimes his mind would drift off in the middle of yet another long explanation; thoughts filled with the knowledge that he _really_ was finally _here_. That somewhere, right now, this very minute on these very grounds, Uzumaki Naruto had returned as he promised.

_/Fine then, Sasuke. You hereby have the permission to kick my ass for as long and as much as you want. /_

_(as if I could even if I wanted to…)_

"…specifications, Sasuke-sama?"

Someone tapped his shoulder gently, and he started; fighting the rise of colors to his cheeks as he noticed the mixed expressions of confusion, irritation, and worry on the faces of the men around him. God help him, but what the hell had they been talking about again?

"Tazuna-san was asking if the measurements on the blueprint were the final decisions for the construction of the private homes," Officer Tsubasa whispered into his ear, saving him from further embarrassment.

"Ah, yes…" he began, but Tazuna was already shaking his head and rolling up the large blueprint.

"Perhaps we ought to wait for Itachi-sama's return," the big man growled. "It appears we cannot have a decent conversation on this matter with you today, Sasuke-sama. You've been quite distracted and it is not plausible to work in this sort of environment."

Sasuke bristled at the coated insult, and when he spoke; his voice was icy. "My brother and Shisui-san are away for the week in Tokyo for an important conference. You will be dealing with me in regard to this matter, but if you feel you cannot continue to work for us, by all means turn in your resignation. I have no doubt there are many more contractors willing to take over once your services are terminated."

Tazuna's face flushed and he looked at his men for backup. However, most of them were looking away in embarrassment, for they desperately needed the work and Tazuna's bossy attitude wasn't going to risk them getting a paycheck to put food on the table for their families.

All the same, Sasuke knew he was partly to blame and giving himself a mental slap to concentrate, he nodded toward the blueprint and tried again. "Perhaps we should start over. I apologize for my absentmindedness. I have quite a lot of things to do, so you can forgive me for…straying a little."

Tazuna's ruffled feathers seemed to be appeased at this and with a wan smile, he unrolled the blueprint to begin his speech again.

It wasn't until about seven in the evening, did Sasuke finally find some time to put his feet up – not literally though that idea had crossed his mind at some point. His limp was now a little more pronounced from all the walking he had done and he sank heavily into his chair; listening to his stomach growl in protest from lack of nourishment. Luckily someone (Haku probably) had been astute enough to leave a simple lunch of sandwiches and some tea for him, which he wolfed down hungrily while reading through the never-ending list of potential families willing to relocate back into Byaku-Shinkyou as soon as the residential homes were re-built. There would be the arduous task of allocating homes to said families, and Itachi had felt it would be a good idea to make it a lottery of sorts. If they simply allowed every Tom, Dick, and Harry to move in, there was the likelihood of some people living on the streets. That could not be allowed.

"…wait a minute. What the hell am I doing?" he whispered in disbelief as he polished off the last of his sandwich and blinked at the paper in his hand. Was he actually _working_ when he could be with someone else right now? How could he have forgotten about Naruto for crying out loud? But one could hardly blame him. The past few weeks had left him so conditioned into this routine, he felt his cheeks burn with embarrassment at his blatant stupidity.

_(guess it's my turn to apologize for keeping you waiting)_

He left his office, not bothering to keep to his usual habit of keeping his documents in order. He was careful not to use the more public path to his quarters, choosing instead a 'back' route to lessen the chance of being stopped by another officer or civilian needing his input for one thing or another. Every step he took, he seemed to roll back time, and when he finally approached the wall protecting his 'home', his limp was long forgotten and his head, heart and everything else in-between, seemed to have taken on a weightless quality. He was sure if anyone touched him now, it was bound to send him floating into the heavens.

So mentally charged was he to see Naruto, he almost missed the quiet figure sitting on the narrow wooden bridge over the pond. He stiffened and narrowed his gaze.

"Haku?" he called out warily, a hand subconsciously touching the handle of his _katana_ just in case it wasn't the right person. He was not disappointed when the shadow lifted its head before raising a hand to wave shyly.

He relaxed and made to turn; torn between wishing him a goodnight and dashing off for his rendezvous with a certain someone. However, there was something about Haku actually sitting out here that made him change his mind and walk over to meet him.

"Everything all right?" he asked as he sat beside the younger man, who looked as if he was about to stand up. Sasuke waved for him to remain in his position, and Haku obliged though there was a nervous energy about him as he swung his legs slowly back and forth like a child.

_Please don't tell me he's not given up on Naruto yet,_ a part of Sasuke wailed in dismay; recollecting this same behavior when Haku had 'challenged' him during their stay at Buk-gu. _I really don't want to have another conversation on why –_

"I know you are eager to see Naruto-kun," Haku began quietly without looking at Sasuke. His hands were now clasped tightly on his lap as if hoping to draw some inner strength. "But…I…I wanted to tell you this before I lost my nerve, Sasuke-sama."

Sasuke sighed and braced himself for it. So much for thoughts of Haku moving on. This was going to be much tougher than he could possibly imagine –

"…already told Naruto-kun about it and he gave me his blessing," came the words which had Sasuke's heart and stomach twisting with a pain that made him slightly nauseous. He couldn't believe Naruto would still entertain the idea of being with Haku after everything! Just what the hell was wrong with that inconsiderate blond bastard?!

He realized that Haku was looking at him with an expression that seemed like a cross between fear and hope, and Sasuke realized he'd have to say something soon. He squared his shoulders and took a deep breath.

"Listen…Haku," he said with what he hoped was understanding in his tone, though there was a slight hint of irritation in there. "I know you're still not over Naruto, but…and I hate to say this bluntly…I can't let you do this again, all right?"

He met the bemused brown eyes and forced himself to continue. So what if he was going to sound like a bastard? He wasn't going to give up Naruto without a fight if it came to that, and as much as he loved Haku like a brother, he'd really have to put his foot down. "I can't let you have him," he added firmly. "My feelings for him are…well…you should know this by now. We cannot continue to have these little battles of will over his…what? Why are you giggling? What's so funny?"

"Oh, Sasuke-sama," Haku giggled and threw his arms around Sasuke's neck, taking them both by surprise at his daring. However, considering this wasn't the first time they had shared a hug, Sasuke could only suffer this in silence, though he couldn't help the blush as Haku placed a tender kiss on his cheek. "So typical of you to have selective hearing when it comes to Naruto-kun."

"Hey now -"

Haku placed a finger against his former master's lips and shook his head lightly. "Will you promise not to interrupt me until I'm finished, Sasuke-sama?"

He chuckled at the frown this elicited, but at Sasuke's reluctant nod, he withdrew his finger and took another deep breath. He reached for those strong lean fingers – which tensed at first at the contact – before eventually relaxing within Haku's gentle grasp.

Holding onto his former master's hand, Haku began to speak quietly and earnestly; his words cocooning them in such warmth that seemed to protect them against the chilly night air. He seemed to turn back the clock, taking them back to a time when their future seemed uncertain; when all he could do was watch and admire the young master from afar, never knowing if his fate was to remain Orochimaru's slave for the rest of his life. He recounted the moment Sasuke chose him and how his life had changed because of it.

He raised Sasuke's hand to his lips. "I know I've told you this a thousand times, but you'll never really know just how much it meant to me, Sasuke-sama. Perhaps that was part of the reason why I was so keen on introducing you to Naruto-kun after I met him." A wistful smile came to his visage. "It's hard to put into words what it is about that man that makes you never forget him, right Sasuke-sama?"

Sasuke nodded in agreement; not sure he would have found his voice anyway. Haku was right; right that he had been the one to get them 'together' even if it had been in a roundabout way. Right in that Naruto's aura/charisma/whatever you wished to call it, was unexplainable to anyone who had not witnessed it firsthand. Naruto was simply put – _an experience_.

"Our time in Buk-gu was a period of learning for me…for all of us, I think," Haku continued just as something – akin to feather-like kisses - fell onto their skins. They both looked up at the same time, realizing it was nothing more than a few snow flurries; not bad enough to have them running in for shelter just yet. If they were lucky it would only leave a light dusting of snow come morning.

All the same, Sasuke found himself shielding Haku as if to protect him from the weather. It was something the younger man noticed and appreciated as he lay his head upon the stronger shoulder; hands still clasped and held to his chest.

"I know I did some things I'm not proud of," Haku continued softly. "But I grew up a little because of it, and I'm so glad because I had you, Naruto-kun, Karin-chan, Shikamaru-san and Temari-chan as my mentors and friends. I discovered a side of me I never knew I possessed and as time has gone by, I realize that I wanted that side of me to keep getting stronger." He paused for a long minute before continuing; his voice even lower as if afraid to speak. "I realize I was raised to be subservient to everyone else, and for years that was all I was made to believe. However, you've taught me that I could be more than that, Sasuke-sama, that there is potential for me beyond these constrictions I've put on myself, and because of that…I've…I've…I've made the decision to do just that."

He pulled away then and forcing himself to meet the thoughtful dark eyes before him, Haku finished brokenly. "Sasori-sama has invited me to live with him at his birthplace by the end of the month. He thinks it's best I get away from all of this…and to discover who I really am. Oh, Sasuke-sama, I've struggled with this for the past two days because I didn't know what to do or how to tell you. I was so happy that Sasori-sama wanted me because of _me_ – not because of what I could do for him. You've seen how he is, Sasuke-sama, do you think I'm making the right decision? Do you think I should go with him? You only need to tell me to stay, Sasuke-sama, and I'll do it. I'll - "

"How can you say that after all that talk about hoping to discover your full potential?" came the quiet but strained reply, which sent a rush of color to Haku's cheeks. He lowered his gaze; dismayed that he might have upset a man who meant the world to him.

"I'm sor…sorry," Haku whispered. "I don't -"

He was silenced as Sasuke's hand cupped his cheek to force his gaze upwards. Within those dark eyes, there was a warmth which seemed to make the weather inconsequential. It was made even more irrelevant when a tender kiss was placed on his forehead, though lingering for a while before Sasuke finally pulled away.

"What does your heart tell you?" came the question that held so much weight, it hung between them like lead.

"My…heart…" Haku stammered; his eyes shimmering with tears. "My heart says…yes. It says "yes", Sasuke-sama. I _want_ to be with him." His voice became steadier, stronger as if this confirmation was all he really needed. "I want him…to be with him so very much."

Sasuke gave a small smile. "Well there you go. I think you've already answered your own question. The doors have been opened, Haku, and you have to take that final plunge into the unknown. Just like you pushed me when it came to Naruto, remember? If you hadn't opened my eyes…where would I be today?"

Haku's heart leapt at the deep words of sincerity; realizing that this was Sasuke's way of 'apologizing' as well as acknowledging just how influential Haku's presence had been in his life. He stole a quick glance toward the building where the warm and inviting glow of the lamps within seemed to beckon them…well at least one of them. He turned back to Sasuke and reached for his hands to clasp them again.

_(I will miss you both terribly)_

"And here I am keeping you away from him," he said aloud in a voice that trembled with the emotions he tried to hold in check. "How selfish of me."

"Considering I'm about to lose my close companion and confidant before he showed up…I think it's a fair trade," Sasuke drawled.

"You'll probably forget all about me after a few weeks," Haku teased, though the tears he had struggled so hard to control finally broke free. Sobbing even harder when Sasuke reached out to brush them away gently. "You'll…forget about me…"

"Don't be silly," Sasuke chided, and pulled the younger man into a hard embrace. His voice was gruff; a clear sign he was having to control himself as well. "You'll come back here whenever you want. You know these gates and my home will always be open, Haku. Always. Now wipe those tears. Besides, we've still got a couple of weeks before you leave. I've got to test Sasori to make sure he's definitely the man for you before he whisks you away."

Haku gave a breathless giggle in between sniffles. "Just like Naruto-kun. You two act like you're my fathers. Promise you won't hurt Sasori-sama too much."

Sasuke smirked and shrugged. "We'll see. Come on…let's get up before we freeze our asses off out here." He stood and helped Haku to his feet.

"Will you be okay?" he asked as he reached out to tenderly wipe Haku's face with the sleeve of his uniform.

Haku nodded and then gently nudged Sasuke toward his room. "Don't worry about me, Sasuke-sama. I believe someone else needs you more than I do right now." He stopped and seemed to consider something before surprising them again with another hug that just about took Sasuke's breath away. This time, he whispered into the older man's ear; words that had Sasuke blushing up a storm.

"Not in this lifetime," Sasuke murmured when Haku pulled away with a grin. He shook his head and spun on his heels; face still flaming at what was insinuated. "Get some sleep, Haku. Until Sasori takes you away, you're still technically my semi-manservant. I expect a hot breakfast…for two in the morning."

Haku bowed. "As you wish, Sasuke-sama. Have a good…no…a great night! And it's okay if you wish to take the day off tomorrow, I'll make some kind of excuse for you."

For that, he received nothing but an exasperated shake of Sasuke's head; still smiling as he watched his former master walk across the bridge and toward his bedroom. He watched as Sasuke's steps appeared slower as he approached the screen door before coming to a complete stop; perhaps frozen by something he was seeing or simply unable to go through with it. Haku was unaware he was silently urging Sasuke to go inside; hoping that Sasuke wouldn't get cold feet and decide it wasn't worth dealing with Naruto tonight. However, as if his fervent plea was heard, the screen door was finally pushed open then closed leaving nothing but a silhouette of a man he would never stop admiring. Haku sagged in relief and closed his eyes before lifting his head to the heavens where the snow flurries seemed to shower him with a million feathery kisses.

_Be happy, Sasuke-sama… Naruto-kun,_ he prayed silently with a peaceful smile on his features. _Be good to each other, my dearest friends and mentors, for I'll always love you both until my dying day._

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke and Naruto:<em>

_A heart burdened must seek its peace…_

He faltered in his steps; not because he was afraid or in doubt of what must be done. He faltered for despite his words of encouragement and consolation to Haku, it began to dawn on him that he had just severed yet another valuable bond in his life. There had been Asuma – a brother, a mentor and a friend - whose death still plagued him from time to time. And now Haku. He was the only other person who had dared to crack the wall he had built around himself all those years, and losing him was going to much harder than he had flippantly assumed earlier.

_(but look on the bright side, Sasuke. Your brother has returned. You have new friends in Karin and the members of the Akatsuki willing to be by your side, and the most important of all? There's a man in that room willing to share a future with you. Think of it as Haku's eternal gift to you; a realization that you could still find the humanity within)_

_An eternal gift, huh?_ He smiled ruefully and finally pushed open the _shoji_ screen door; only for the smile to waver as his heavy heart began to beat in an entirely different rhythm. It was a throbbing ache that soon followed; an ache that seemed to pierce through said heart as if hoping to wrench out every remnant of emotion left within. It sent an almost violent rush of blood to the head; creating a feverish sensation that burned his retinas. There was absolutely nothing strange about the sight before him. Hadn't he shared a futon with Naruto before? And yet –

_(oh be still his heart)_

…how could one explain the simple joy experienced at the figure sprawled haphazardly on pristine white sheets? How could he utter into coherent words the guilty pleasure experienced at the sight of long bare legs (all thanks to the _yukata_ riding up his hips with every toss and turn), the tantalizing view of a bare chest with a hint of a rosy nipple as the sleeves of the robe slid off a shoulder that begged to be caressed? And there was the strong neck that was slightly arched, leading to facial features he had memorized and dreamed about far too many times. Pink-tinted lips were parted and inviting; his now shoulder-length blond tresses stuck to his cheeks and forehead, eager to be brushed aside lovingly. How unfortunate he couldn't see those eyes hidden behind closed lids, but he could wait. He had waited for more than eight months for this reunion, so a few extra minutes couldn't hurt.

_(just give me a little more time)_

It was with an effort that he tore his gaze away and walked into the next room; his steps so silent, his companion did not stir. Carefully, he began to undress and when he was completely nude, he made his way into the bathroom for his 'final purification' rites. It wasn't so much a washing away of his sins, for he was sure the Great One had already complied a large book filled with his iniquities over the years – no amount of purification rites could absolve them. This was purely symbolic; a realization that he was going to wash away the remnants of Orochimaru's influence and to prepare himself for a new life with Naruto.

_Just who do you think you are?_ came the taunting voice. _His blushing bride?_

He struggled against the flood of color to fill his cheeks as he scrubbed even harder. _A bride?_ How…stupid. He wasn't naive and was more than aware that just as Itachi and Shisui had to hide their relationship from the public, he and Naruto would have to do the same. The irony was that he could put himself in the shoes of those who considered such a partnership as disgusting; after all, once upon a time, he had thought the very same, hadn't he? However, it was not his job to try to convince others that he was happy with the way he was now, but eventually he knew that the rumors would begin; that the rest of the world will begin to wonder why either Uchiha brother had not picked a wife to extend the family tree. What then? Would he gave in to public pressure and select a bride for the hell of it and choose to be with Naruto in 'secret'? Could he really live the rest of his life as a lie just to please others?

He sighed and doused himself with lukewarm water to rinse off. Slowly, he lowered the basin to the floor and stared glumly at it for a long minute.

"To live a lie," he whispered. "Haven't I been doing that for so long now? What do I do, Naruto? What can we do?"

With a deep breath, he rose to his feet; ignoring the tub he had filled with water to soak in at least for a few extra minutes. He didn't even bother reaching for a towel to dry himself. His wet footprints stained the _tatami_ mats as he padded back into the bedroom; his body glistening with water like jeweled dew drops. He came to a stop beside the futon to stare at the sleeping figure in solemn silence. He knew he ought to let the weary man sleep; after all it was a relatively long journey from Kyoto, but…

_(not tonight)_

"Naruto?" he called out in a voice that was barely above a whisper. He stuck out a foot and nudged the blond's side gently. All he received was a low groan and Naruto turning away to bury his face into a pillow.

Sasuke rolled his eyes; aware of the dark stains he was now leaving on the sheet as he nudged Naruto again. This time, he used his big toe to press against the scarred cheek; smirking lightly as a hand reached out to swipe it away absently. Not giving in, Sasuke poked again – harder still – raising his foot when Naruto made another attempt to smack it. One more poke – a muttered curse and finally –

_(finally)_

…heavy eyelids were lifted slowly to reveal eyes that never ceased to leave him breathless. They were still slightly unfocused, but when Sasuke's toe (and foot) came into view again, one could only imagine what Naruto was thinking –

_(dreams about Big Foot?)_

…until his teeth suddenly clamped gently but firmly around the naughty toe; the cobwebs of sleep gradually being erased as he looked up to meet the dark and hooded gaze trained on him. Sasuke swallowed a groan as the teeth eased its pressure, only for his toe to be swallowed within the warmth of that talented mouth. He shivered, with delight, at the sensation of Naruto's tongue caressing his flesh, biting hard on his lip as his knees began to weaken with the effort it was taking to remain standing. Unashamedly, his erection became more evident with every suckle; growing in length and teasing the man below to take what was now rightfully his.

Naruto noticed and eventually released the toe with a hard kiss before sitting up; though he was now holding the foot as prisoner within his hands.

"Nice way to wake me up," he drawled; his voice still husky from sleep.

Sasuke gave a small smile and reached out to sink his fingers into the tousled blond hair; fingertips seeking the scalp to massage it in a way that had Naruto closing his eyes to moan in pleasure. For his part, his hands began to move up Sasuke's damp legs – blindly touching…feeling every hard joint or smooth curve of his ankles, shin, knees and thighs. His fingertips caressed the scars left from his battles; and even without opening his eyes; he could feel the most recent wound inflicted by Orochimaru (he was sure) not much further from the original stab wound he had caused. Blindly, he moved closer; fingertips making way for lips that worshipped the scars with affectionate kisses. He felt Sasuke tremble above him, the fingers in his hair tightening as he sought to steady himself. He would never know how close his actions were to making Sasuke cry; how the sharp memory of Orochimaru piercing him would be erased with this selfless action by the one he loved.

When something wet and sticky fell onto his cheek, Naruto forced his lashes open to notice what it was. Unable to stop a smile, he licked his lips and dared to dart a tongue beneath the throbbing length that teased ever so wickedly.

Someone moaned.

"That bad, huh?" Naruto asked huskily as more drops of Sasuke's pre-cum fell upon his nose and lips.

Blushing, embarrassed and yet not about to apologize for his body's betrayal, Sasuke cocked his head and dared his lover to proceed. "Why don't you do something about it?"

To emphasize this, he pushed aside Naruto's _yukata_ with a foot to reveal the pair of blue boxers that could barely contain the stiff arousal begging to be released. With an almost cruel smirk, he allowed his toes to torture Naruto; pressing against the hard length, stroking up and down ever so slowly until Naruto's trembling hands gripped Sasuke's hips so tight, there would be faint bruises come morning. He hissed back a groan and met the challenge posed in those dark eyes, and as his lips captured the tip of Sasuke's cock –

_(oh God yes)_

…Sasuke returned the favor with a much harder press of his foot against Naruto, gasping just as he was promptly swallowed whole and his toes felt the damp wetness of pre-cum against the boxers. Pity he had to give that up quickly, for Naruto seemed hell bent on driving him insane with his expertise. He had no idea how many 'lessons' the blond had learned since the last time they shared a futon, but goodness! How adept this man had become to knowing just when to pause, swallow, take as deep as possible, tease, fondle, and leave him wanting more. He clung onto Naruto's shoulders; fingers burrowed deeply into his shoulders as he struggled to remain standing. His head spun like an uncontrollable top; his eyes squeezed tightly as his breath- shallow and ragged – mingled with Naruto's name hung upon his lips in a fevered mantra. Sasuke knew he wasn't going to last another moment, and it was with a monumental effort that he pushed himself away from his lover, but only to sag onto his knees before Naruto with a choked sob.

"…Sas…Sasuke?" Naruto panted breathlessly; an obvious sign that he too was exhibiting a lot of self-control. "What…what's wrong? Did I do something wrong? Do you want us to sto…stop?"

Sasuke shook his head, his arms wrapping around Naruto's neck as he seemed to want to melt into the man before him. He buried his face against the blond's neck and inhaled his scent like a man deprived. The hot sting of unshed tears burned within eyes that had once and will always see the true beauty within Naruto. Perhaps it was now finally hitting him that this was no longer a dream; that for now…Naruto was here with him – in this room where he had spent so many lonely nights…it was almost too much to take in at once.

His lips tasted the slightly salty flesh, trembling as Naruto's arms encircled his waist to pull him closer still. He hated the fact that the blasted _yukata_ was still a hindrance between their bodies completely fusing as one, but at this moment – as he licked and bit tenderly – he would savor this for as long as he could.

"Sasuke…?" came the quiet question filled with worry.

He finally pulled away, but just far enough to stare into those blue eyes that were filled with an emotion any blind man could see. It didn't need his 'special abilities' to know that he was loved, and that was a feeling no words could ever describe. None would be suitable anyway.

"Absolve me," he began in a trembling whisper as his lips moved toward Naruto's ear. The blond's shiver brought a smile to his visage.

"Teach me…purify me," Sasuke continued in that same whisper, his lips now trailing down the scarred cheek; a tongue tracing each etched mysterious mark as if hoping to unlock its secret.

"Strengthen me…" This time he lowered his arms, but only to finally tug away the sash barely holding the robe together. Onyx eyes held blue prisoner; neither man unable to look away even if they wanted to. Naruto was hardly aware of raising his hips to allow Sasuke access to his boxers, which were lowered roughly and impatiently.

"Sasuke," came the guttural groan of desire as Naruto felt those strong fingers wrap around his throbbing cock to stroke tenderly…then faster…harder. "I want..." he began, but only to be silenced as Sasuke's lips pressed against his gently.

"Take me to thyself," he moaned as he sat up a little higher and positioned himself above the organ he had so lovingly prepared. "That I may be thine…and thine only, Uzumaki Naruto."

He fought back a low cry as he impaled himself upon Naruto; gasping when his hips were restrained and his lips seized in a kiss that said all that was left to be unsaid. Hearts pounded and throbbed as one; a steady rhythm eventually established as they rocked and strained into each other as if desperate to reach a peak of nirvana yet unheard of.

It was Naruto who broke down first for the enormity of what was happening was so much better than what his fantasies could construct. He buried his flushed features against the heaving chest; no longer able to look into those eyes that could read him so easily. He sobbed silently as he felt the familiar surge of adrenaline beginning from the tip of his toes to the part of them which had become one; forcing his thrusts to go even harder, deeper and faster than before. He sobbed harder still as he heard Sasuke's heartbeat against his ear; knowing damn well that once he had been so close to death; not sure if he'd ever get to hear such a beautiful sound. He sobbed when Sasuke moaned his name, and when he felt Sasuke stiffen and jerk at his impending orgasm; he finally forced himself to look up and into that sweaty visage. He lifted a trembling hand to push away the long strands of damp black hair that clung to his cheeks, and in a voice that was steady yet filled with emotion, Naruto finally said what he had known for far too long.

"I love you, Uchiha Sasuke."

Timed perfectly, for the widening dark eyes – now just a little too bright – glazed over as a more carnal reaction followed. He exploded with a breathless cry; his body a perfect arch of ecstasy that was further heightened with those three words he had longed to hear. Under ordinary circumstances, the very idea of crying at this moment would have made him want to kick himself for being so weak, but damn the consequences.

He flung himself upon Naruto, sending them toppling back to the futon though more than aware that his lover was yet to reach his completion. He sat up a little; hands placed on either side of Naruto's head and slowly…cruelly…tortuously…

"Christ," Naruto whimpered as he threw back his head in delight. "Sasuke…don't…"

…rotated his hips – once, twice…three times…each time swallowing a little more of that thick, hard cock until…

"Naruto?" he called out softly.

"Hmm…oh God…"

"Look at me."

"Wha…what?"

Glazed blue eyes met warm black ones again.

"Sasuke…"

"Say it again."

"Say…say what again?"

"What you said earlier…"

"…ah…oh…that…I said…fuck! Sasuke…I'm gonna come…"

Sasuke grinned and shook his head. "Wrong words." He moved and made as if to withdraw, when his hips were trapped again and Naruto strained to repeat his confession.

"I…love…you."

"Again."

"I love you."

"…ah…ah…again…" This time it was a breathless request for he felt Naruto's peaking point within him. Swollen. Thicker. Stretching him until he felt he'd go mad with the sensation.

_(oh Naruto) _

"I love you, Sasuke. Always…always…_always_!"

He came with a much louder cry; his teeth sinking into Sasuke's shoulder as if on reflex, breaking skin without meaning to until the taste of something warm and metallic filled his mouth. He would later apologize profusely for the bite – not that Sasuke seemed to mind much, for this only seemed to trigger yet another orgasm for him; perhaps the last vestibules of a certain man's sadistic and masochistic nature still buried within.

_(I will never stop loving you…)_

* * *

><p>In the aftermath, they lay cocooned in an embrace as if afraid that the other would vanish if they weren't any closer. Outside, the flurries continued to descend; bathing Byaku-Shinkyou with a thin layer of Nature's white blanket. It would make for a beautiful sight come morning, but for now, the couple were content to bask in the glow of their lovemaking; once racing hearts finally settling into a normal and steady rhythm.<p>

Naruto continued to trace shapeless forms upon Sasuke's back; the even breathing a clear sign that his exhausted lover had finally fallen asleep. As much as he would have loved to talk 'til dawn, he had to be considerate of the kind of day Sasuke had been through. Haku had been right about the dark circles of weariness around Sasuke's eyes, but at least tonight they had looked less obvious; perhaps due to their 'other activities'. He couldn't help the faint blush that came to his cheeks as he re-called how wanton they (especially Sasuke) had behaved, and the climax – in his humble opinion – coming when Sasuke had finally whispered a sleepy but sincere "I love you so much more, Uzumaki Naruto" into his ear.

He looked down to the thick head of dark hair upon his chest, and felt his heart stir with that gut-wrenching emotion he couldn't describe. The overwhelming need to protect this guy (even though he was sure Sasuke needed no such 'protection') was so intense he couldn't stand it. He knew he had promised to return to Kyoto before the end of the year, but how could he leave after this? How could he bear to walk away from this man even if it was just for a few days or weeks?

_I can't do it. I won't be able to do it. It will probably kill me to be apart from him again. _

He tightened his lips as he came to a decision, and with a tender kiss upon Sasuke's head, he carefully slid away from the embrace – which brought about a frown on Sasuke's face though he only flopped onto his back and kept on sleeping – slipped into his _yukata_ and went in search of a telephone. Unfortunately, it took him poking around into a few more rooms before he could find the damn device. He'd really have to do something about furnishings around here. Most of the rooms were empty or dusty.

Sitting on the floor, he dialed the familiar numbers with trembling fingers; aware that it was quite early in the morning and Jiraiya was more than likely to –

"You had better be captured and tortured to death to be calling me by this time, Naruto," came the groggy but familiar voice that brought a smile to his face.

"And I love you too, old man," he teased quietly. "Sorry to wake you up this early, but…" He took a deep breath and ran fingers through his hair.

_(justsayitjustsayitjustsayit)_

"…I don't think I'll be able to make it back…at least not by the end of the year," he finally blurted out with his heart in his throat. At Jiraiya's stony silence, Naruto pressed on earnestly. "It's almost the end of the year anyway. I mean November then December and then we're in January. All I'm asking is that I spend these next few months with him before I return. That's not too much to ask, is it?"

He sighed heavily; his voice now thick with emotion. "You don't understand. I can't leave him now. I just can't. I want to spend some more time with him, and I know I have my obligations too, but…but…I love him all right? And I just want to be with the one I really care about for as long as I can. So please…make up some excuse for me, cover for me until I get back. I beg of you."

_(if he insists…I swear if he insists, I'll go rogue! I swear I'll…!)_

"Fine, fine," Jiraiya eventually said with a sigh of resignation. "At least you've finally stopped beating around the goddamn bush and finally admitted your feelings for the man." He grumbled beneath his breath about having to make up some excuse to the family heads at the next meeting, but returned in a much firmer and kinder voice. "Enjoy your time with him then, Naruto, and be sure to invite him to Kyoto one of these days so we can share another cup of _sake_, eh?"

Naruto blushed at the invitation for he knew this was a blessing of sorts. He bowed his head in gratitude though the older man couldn't see it. "Thank you," he croaked for he was sure he'd burst into tears if he spoke any louder. "Thank you so much…for everything."

"I have done nothing, Naruto. I should be the one thanking you for showing me just how wonderful life can be if you look on the bright side of things. Something your father would be proud of I'm sure. Now please go and get some sleep and do not call me again unless you're on fire…literally. Good night and be happy."

He hung up before Naruto could get another word in, but that was okay with him. He all but ran back to the bedroom, his intention to blurt out the good news to Sasuke, when he remembered that his lover was still passed out in exhaustion. His heart full, he knelt beside the futon to study the peaceful features in repose.

_(Uchiha…Sasuke…you really are something special)_

To think that of all the people in the world he'd want to spend the rest of his life with…it would have to be this man. A man he fell in love with on a hot stuffy day in a bus leading him straight to Hell – so what if the gender was all mixed up at first – the attraction had been there from the moment they met, hadn't it? He chuckled and shook his head. Amazing all the shit they had gone through and to come out of it alive and still capable of choosing to love and live. Why it was like something out of a movie script or it would make for one great novel if he was that good of a writer.

_(but then again…why not?)_

On his hands and knees, his body trembling with excitement at the idea that suddenly hit him, he crawled to his duffel bag and pulled out his notebook and pen. He snuggled back into the futon to lay on his stomach, Sasuke immediately sensing his return and rolling back to press himself closer to the warmth of his partner.

Naruto smiled, leaned close to place a tender kiss on his lover's forehead, before opening the first blank page.

_(how to begin…how to begin…how the hell does one begin? To go back to the past and to relieve it all over again…oh how to begin?)_

Well, from the start would be nice, wouldn't it? And taking a deep breath, Uzumaki Naruto allowed his pen to do all the talking.

_Chapter One:_

_Porcelain Skin_

_It was impossible to miss her…_


	46. Epilogue: Coda

**Notes: **Poem by Dante Alighieri

**Epilogue**

**Coda**

[Excerpts randomly taken from the journals of Uchiha Sasuke]

_"When you find peace within yourself, you become the kind of person who can live at peace with others."_

- Itachi and Shisui's trip was a success in more ways than one. Not only did the conference with the various Watchdog divisions across the country go well, they were able to find a lawyer who worked closely with my father while he was alive. This lawyer had to go into hiding – for obvious reasons – and only agreed to cooperate because of Orochimaru's defeat. As we had falsely assumed, our parents had _not_ left us empty-handed. Unfortunately, Orochimaru had managed to get his hands on the Will where he forced more weak-minded lawyers to change its content. Allegedly, this Will now bequeathed everything in the Uchiha's name to Orochimaru. A 'trust' had been set up for me until I reached the age of twenty-one, which for some reason would still transfer funds to Orochimaru's overseas bank accounts. Needless to say, it was quite a messy affair, but after months of court cases and dealings, the government finally relinquished its hold on Orochimaru's frozen funds and gave it back to my brother and I.

- With more funds available, the final stages for construction were completed in about six months. We now had less land devoted to prisoners (we eliminated the dreaded East Block); returning Byaku-Shinkyou to its original roots where prisoners incarcerated were only kept for a few months, rehabilitated and sent back out to society to become better people. However, those who were deemed too dangerous for public life and were sentenced to death by the courts, would either get the electric chair or lethal injection. No more beheadings.

- We have yet to decide on what to do with Orochimaru's former 'lair' (although Itachi's leaning toward a complete overhaul to create a new school), hence it's still closed off to the general public until a final decision is made. The arena once designated for that pagan festival of Gudan is now a baseball field; much to the townsfolk's' delight. Speaking of townsfolk, we now have about a thousand families living within the grounds; mostly made up of officers, long-lost Uchiha members who had lived in the shadows for so long, and those who were lucky to win a home with the successful lottery Itachi set up. I cannot describe the pleasure it brings me to see familiar childhood sights of families wandering the grounds at all times of the day, children free to run around and play without fear of being exploited, and laughter…oh the laughter…

_(how I've missed that)_

- On the personal side, Karin has established herself as Kabuto's equal in the medical field. Both now work well as a team, and Kabuto has proven to be quite dedicated to his craft, though I still keep a watchful eye on him in case he tries to defect. Though Karin still seems to harbor feelings for me, she is not as overt with them as before and has perhaps come to terms that I will never reciprocate those emotions. I am tempted to let her know that Officer Suigetsu has shown some interest in courting her; although with that man's uncouth attitude, it's hard to tell if he's being serious or not. By the way, he finally accosted me over the unjust beheading of his older brother who was arrested several years ago. I made it clear that I was in a different state of mind back then, and if I went about apologizing to every damn person I upset in those fourteen years, I'd never be finished in this lifetime. He eventually dropped the subject, but only if I agreed to spar with him on occasion. That seemed like a fair deal.

- For the first time in history – okay, since Orochimaru took over – we now have three female officers on the grounds. Officers Tenten, Karin and Hinata were officially sworn in a few weeks ago to much fanfare and publicity. Karin and Hinata will still be a part of the medical team, but will have the honor of wearing their badges and showing off their status proudly. In fact, I do believe all the main players within the Akatsuki organization (including Kisame) were promoted to officers. Kiba returned briefly for the swear-in ceremony, but chose to be stationed in Okinawa to be closer to his family.

- Sasori and Haku bade farewell to us at the end of the month as promised. Karin – who seemed to be on a never-ending cry fest the moment Haku told her the news – threw a party for the couple the night before. Everyone was there – including my brother and Shisui – and between good food, funny anecdotes and exchange of presents; tears were shed, countless photographs were taken and many hugs given. I couldn't get myself to see him off in the morning, though my partner was more than happy to take my place for the both of us. I miss him with every passing day, but if his last happy phone call was any indication, I'll say he's adjusting just fine to 'civilian' life again. Sasori has enrolled him in pre-college classes where he hopes to eventually study Internal Medicine. Wonderful, isn't it? We couldn't be prouder of him.

- As for said partner, I came to discover his notebooks of writings (typos abound) by accident. I was stunned, embarrassed yet terribly pleased at his devotion to store the memories of our relationship in such form. It encouraged me to do the same, and on some nights, we'd sit in companionable silence to write, interrupted only by the occasional "do you remember that time when we…?" or "I'm pretty sure that wasn't the way it happened" or "if you lie about that, Naruto, I'll fucking kill you"…and so on and so forth. So far I've complied quite a few more notebooks than he has; something that's left him baffled since it was all his idea in the first place.

- We spent our first Christmas together and welcomed in the New Year as well. The 'honeymoon' was wonderful, but we both knew he'd have to return to Kyoto; a realization that was much harder to swallow than I thought. All the same, he promised to return in a month, but by then, I knew we would have to make a compromise of sorts when it came to our 'long-distance' relationship. I discussed it with Itachi, who was open to the idea and didn't see a problem with it, and when Naruto returned, he was thrilled to learn that I could follow and live with him in Kyoto whenever we wanted. In fact, we made plans to see the world when we were less swamped with responsibilities (and this, of course, included checking up on Haku). Hopefully, with Sasori's permission, we could drag him around with us on some of the trips. Surely he'd want a break from his studies every now and then, wouldn't he?

- Last but not least, we finally did it…in a subtle way. Once, on a cold winter night, Haku had whispered into my ear that I ought to 'settle' down with Naruto in more ways than one. However, Naruto and I knew that such a thing was impossible in the world we found ourselves in. We knew we were committed to each other spiritually, mentally and physically, so that was more than okay, right? Not for Naruto apparently, for the foolish, stupid, lovable, wonderful idiot showed up to bed one night (while we were in his home in Kyoto) with a small velvet black box he urged me to open. Inside were twin plain gold bands; nothing extravagant. However etched on the inside were our initials and the simple phrase –

_S & N…Eternally Yours_

…which had me stunned into silence at his audacity and yet extraordinary thoughtfulness.

_(ah how I love him)_

- We vowed to wear the rings until our dying day, even though we knew society might frown and begin to demand we prove our heterosexuality. However - and until that day arrives - Naruto and I will continue to love and live as we choose and be _happy_ no matter what anyone else thinks. Why just the other day we actually held hands in public as we walked through the breathtaking Kyoto Botanical Gardens without drawing any extra attention. Could this be a sign of things to come?

One can only hope, my dear reader. One can only hope.

_There is a gentle thought that often springs__  
><em>_to life in me, because it speaks of you.__  
><em>_Its reasoning about love's so sweet and true,__  
><em>_the heart is conquered, and accepts these things__  
><em>_this is love's messenger and newly sent__  
><em>_to bring me all Love's words and desires._

**THE END**


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